1 00:00:02,160 --> 00:00:03,693 Here's what you missed on Glee: Regionals is coming up 2 00:00:03,764 --> 00:00:05,131 and Jessie's left the glee club, and though it seems like 3 00:00:06,272 --> 00:00:07,839 which is confusing. 4 00:00:07,910 --> 00:00:10,211 I think I kind of like her. I don't want her to get hurt. 5 00:00:10,284 --> 00:00:12,752 Quinn's preggo and feels like she's totally alone. 6 00:00:12,825 --> 00:00:14,792 And Sue won't leave Will alone as the poor guy's trying 7 00:00:14,864 --> 00:00:15,964 to get over divorcing his terrible wife, Terri. 8 00:00:16,035 --> 00:00:17,435 I mean, she's not terrible. 9 00:00:17,506 --> 00:00:19,140 She's just kind of... you know, terrible. 10 00:00:19,211 --> 00:00:21,421 Sorry. And that's what you missed on Glee. 11 00:00:23,490 --> 00:00:25,023 (bell ringing) 12 00:00:25,095 --> 00:00:26,462 MERCEDES: Is it just me, or does it feel like 13 00:00:26,533 --> 00:00:28,100 we have a real shot at Regionals next month? 14 00:00:28,171 --> 00:00:29,938 The Ohio Show Choir chat rooms have all been buzzing 15 00:00:30,009 --> 00:00:31,610 about how Vocal Adrenaline has lost a step. 16 00:00:31,681 --> 00:00:33,482 I agree-- the judges know all of their tricks 17 00:00:33,554 --> 00:00:34,754 and now that we have Jessie, 18 00:00:34,824 --> 00:00:36,358 they've lost their best performer. 19 00:00:36,428 --> 00:00:39,697 You guys have to come to the auditorium-- it's an emergency! 20 00:00:39,772 --> 00:00:41,273 (bell ringing) 21 00:00:45,790 --> 00:00:48,559 Jessie? 22 00:00:48,632 --> 00:00:50,800 What are you doing up there with them? 23 00:00:50,872 --> 00:00:53,073 I've transferred back to Carmel High, Rachel. 24 00:00:53,146 --> 00:00:54,947 I'm sorry that it's come to this, 25 00:00:55,017 --> 00:00:57,185 but you guys were awful to me. 26 00:00:57,258 --> 00:00:58,625 You never accepted me, 27 00:00:58,696 --> 00:01:00,830 you never listened to my clearly superior ideas. 28 00:01:00,902 --> 00:01:03,170 Why are you here in our auditorium? 29 00:01:03,242 --> 00:01:04,776 The blogs and the chat rooms say that we're finished, 30 00:01:04,847 --> 00:01:06,448 and that you guys are ripe to topple us. 31 00:01:06,518 --> 00:01:07,685 We just wanted to show you 32 00:01:07,756 --> 00:01:10,124 a something we came up with a few days ago 33 00:01:10,197 --> 00:01:12,331 to see if you agree with that assessment. 34 00:01:16,047 --> 00:01:19,516 (bass line to "Another One Bites the Dust" playing) 35 00:01:20,727 --> 00:01:22,161 * Bom-bom-bom * 36 00:01:22,232 --> 00:01:25,234 Ooh, let's go. 37 00:01:25,308 --> 00:01:26,442 * Steve walks warily down the street * 38 00:01:26,512 --> 00:01:28,446 * With the brim pulled way down low * 39 00:01:28,518 --> 00:01:30,886 * Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet * 40 00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:32,893 * Machine gun's ready to go * 41 00:01:32,964 --> 00:01:34,632 * Are you ready? * * Hey * 42 00:01:34,703 --> 00:01:36,370 * Are you ready for this? * 43 00:01:36,442 --> 00:01:38,076 * Are you hanging on the edge of your seat? * 44 00:01:38,146 --> 00:01:39,814 * Out of the doorway the bullets rip * 45 00:01:39,885 --> 00:01:42,420 * To the sound of the beat * * Yeah * 46 00:01:42,493 --> 00:01:43,893 * Bom-bom-bom * 47 00:01:43,964 --> 00:01:45,832 * Another one bites the dust * 48 00:01:45,903 --> 00:01:48,438 * Bom-bom-bom * 49 00:01:48,511 --> 00:01:50,712 * Another one bites the dust * 50 00:01:50,784 --> 00:01:53,552 * How do you think I'm gonna get along * 51 00:01:53,626 --> 00:01:55,127 * Without you when you're gone? * 52 00:01:55,197 --> 00:01:57,298 * You took me for everything that I had * 53 00:01:57,370 --> 00:01:59,471 * And kicked me out on my own * 54 00:01:59,544 --> 00:02:00,844 * Are you happy? * 55 00:02:00,915 --> 00:02:02,315 * Are you satisfied? * 56 00:02:02,385 --> 00:02:03,752 * How long can you stand the heat? * 57 00:02:03,823 --> 00:02:06,091 * Out of the doorway the bullets rip * 58 00:02:06,164 --> 00:02:08,632 * To the sound of the beat, look out * 59 00:02:08,704 --> 00:02:10,172 * Bom-bom-bom * 60 00:02:10,242 --> 00:02:12,377 * Another one bites the dust. * 61 00:02:12,448 --> 00:02:13,649 (song ends) 62 00:02:16,996 --> 00:02:19,364 Thanks for letting us borrow your auditorium, guys. 63 00:02:19,436 --> 00:02:20,603 It's quaint. 64 00:02:20,674 --> 00:02:22,308 (laughing) 65 00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:27,789 (sighs) 66 00:02:34,782 --> 00:02:36,617 (bell ringing) 67 00:02:36,688 --> 00:02:38,556 ARTIE: It's a Carmel High tradition. 68 00:02:38,628 --> 00:02:41,129 They psych out the competition a few weeks before the big show. 69 00:02:41,202 --> 00:02:42,936 They call it a funkification. 70 00:02:43,007 --> 00:02:44,474 Meaning they show us what they've got, 71 00:02:44,544 --> 00:02:46,312 and we spiral into a deep black funk. 72 00:02:46,384 --> 00:02:47,918 Yeah. Yeah, we used to do the same thing 73 00:02:47,988 --> 00:02:49,489 to other football teams. 74 00:02:49,559 --> 00:02:51,060 You know, try and get inside their head before a big game, 75 00:02:51,132 --> 00:02:52,832 pull little pranks to intimidate them. 76 00:02:52,903 --> 00:02:54,971 Yeah, well, the difference was our football team sucked. 77 00:02:55,043 --> 00:02:56,243 Those guys are golden. 78 00:02:56,314 --> 00:02:57,847 KURT: Come on, keep your heads up, guys. 79 00:02:57,918 --> 00:02:58,985 It's going to take more than that 80 00:02:59,055 --> 00:03:01,256 to get us into a funk. 81 00:03:08,784 --> 00:03:10,418 TINA: I feel so violated. 82 00:03:10,489 --> 00:03:12,323 It's like someone broke into our home. 83 00:03:12,395 --> 00:03:14,496 Look, it was just a lame little prank. 84 00:03:14,568 --> 00:03:16,168 And the fact that they're trying to get to us 85 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,141 means maybe we got them spooked. 86 00:03:18,212 --> 00:03:20,480 Uh-uh, Mr. Shue. They aren't afraid of anything. 87 00:03:20,552 --> 00:03:22,620 That number they did was fantastic. 88 00:03:22,692 --> 00:03:24,059 You know, which doesn't make any sense. 89 00:03:24,130 --> 00:03:25,163 They had all that equipment. 90 00:03:25,233 --> 00:03:26,366 How did they even get in? 91 00:03:26,437 --> 00:03:27,504 I gave 'em all keys. 92 00:03:27,573 --> 00:03:28,707 Helped them do a sound check 93 00:03:28,778 --> 00:03:30,612 over the weekend. 94 00:03:30,682 --> 00:03:32,050 Hey, this way, fellas. 95 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:33,721 Let's punch out this wall here. 96 00:03:33,793 --> 00:03:36,227 That'll open up the space a little bit. Sue, what are you doing? 97 00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:37,700 I can't talk to you now, William. 98 00:03:37,770 --> 00:03:39,871 Drafting class is helping me redecorate around here. 99 00:03:39,944 --> 00:03:41,578 You see, I have Nationals over the weekend, 100 00:03:41,649 --> 00:03:43,349 and I expect to return with a comically large 101 00:03:43,421 --> 00:03:44,655 first place trophy for which 102 00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:47,026 I have absolutely no room in my trophy case. 103 00:03:47,099 --> 00:03:49,033 As soon as you hurry up and lose at Regionals, 104 00:03:49,105 --> 00:03:51,773 this choir room will become my official trophy annex. 105 00:03:51,846 --> 00:03:53,713 You know what it has to look like? 106 00:03:53,785 --> 00:03:57,187 Elvis' gold record room at Graceland. 107 00:03:57,262 --> 00:03:59,196 Except I'll be wanting far fewer morbidly obese 108 00:03:59,268 --> 00:04:01,236 white women waddling around and crying. 109 00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:02,908 Sue, get out of my room. 110 00:04:02,980 --> 00:04:05,882 Glee Clubbers, for you those of you whose hearing 111 00:04:05,955 --> 00:04:09,791 has not been damaged by massive doses of Acutane, listen up. 112 00:04:09,866 --> 00:04:12,168 In a few weeks, Glee Club will be finished. 113 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:13,607 Now how do I know that? 114 00:04:13,678 --> 00:04:16,246 Well, I recently checked the odds with my Vegas bookie, 115 00:04:16,319 --> 00:04:19,788 who told me that you're 40-1 underdogs at Regionals. 116 00:04:19,863 --> 00:04:21,497 You are going to lose, and your dreams 117 00:04:21,569 --> 00:04:22,569 will be crushed. 118 00:04:22,638 --> 00:04:24,206 Sue, can I see your trophy? 119 00:04:24,276 --> 00:04:25,443 Sure, Will. 120 00:04:25,514 --> 00:04:26,480 Hope and dream. 121 00:04:31,599 --> 00:04:33,566 You dropped your trophy, Sue. 122 00:04:33,638 --> 00:04:36,173 You know, for me, trophies are like herpes. 123 00:04:36,246 --> 00:04:39,281 You can try to get rid of them, but they just keep coming. 124 00:04:39,355 --> 00:04:40,989 You know why? 125 00:04:41,059 --> 00:04:44,428 Sue Sylvester has hourly flare-ups of burning, itchy, 126 00:04:44,503 --> 00:04:45,870 highly contagious talent. 127 00:04:45,941 --> 00:04:47,174 Enjoy your last few days here. 128 00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,847 This room is mine. 129 00:04:49,919 --> 00:04:54,423 (bell ringing) 130 00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:55,933 So you sign here, 131 00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:59,006 and here. 132 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:02,282 And you sign here and here. 133 00:05:05,299 --> 00:05:06,866 (pens clicking) 134 00:05:24,590 --> 00:05:26,858 (pens scribbling) 135 00:05:28,067 --> 00:05:30,168 (clearing throat) 136 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:33,776 Well... 137 00:05:33,851 --> 00:05:35,652 By the power vested in me by the bar association 138 00:05:35,723 --> 00:05:38,158 of the great State of Ohio, 139 00:05:38,230 --> 00:05:41,266 I know pronounce you no longer husband and wife. 140 00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:43,241 Mazel tov. 141 00:05:46,689 --> 00:05:49,724 (door closing) 142 00:06:02,035 --> 00:06:04,770 You're still that 16-year-old boy to me. 143 00:06:06,081 --> 00:06:07,948 You always will be. 144 00:06:22,262 --> 00:06:23,696 (door closing) 145 00:06:23,767 --> 00:06:26,035 (bell ringing) 146 00:06:26,107 --> 00:06:29,810 All right, guys, today I want to talk to you about regrets. 147 00:06:29,885 --> 00:06:31,185 Who has some? 148 00:06:31,256 --> 00:06:33,924 Giving my heart to Jessie, just to have it crushed 149 00:06:33,997 --> 00:06:35,864 like the stage floor at a performance of Stomp. 150 00:06:35,936 --> 00:06:38,871 Thinking "trust me" was a sensible birth control option. 151 00:06:38,945 --> 00:06:40,045 We all have them. 152 00:06:40,116 --> 00:06:42,117 I just finalized my divorce. 153 00:06:42,189 --> 00:06:42,955 I regret living in a relationship 154 00:06:43,024 --> 00:06:44,658 that wasn't working. 155 00:06:44,730 --> 00:06:47,531 Letting her put me in these deep funks 156 00:06:47,605 --> 00:06:49,006 and not fighting back. 157 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:51,944 Besides creeping us out, why are you telling us this? 158 00:06:52,018 --> 00:06:55,620 Because if we lose to Vocal Adrenaline at Regionals, 159 00:06:55,696 --> 00:06:57,030 none of us are going to regret it. 160 00:06:57,099 --> 00:06:58,199 We will have given it our best shot 161 00:06:58,270 --> 00:06:59,971 and we won't look back. 162 00:07:00,042 --> 00:07:02,543 But we will regret letting them get the best of us 163 00:07:02,616 --> 00:07:04,083 before the competition. 164 00:07:04,154 --> 00:07:06,889 Which is why we need to hit them back just like they hit us. 165 00:07:06,962 --> 00:07:11,132 So you want us to TP their choir room? 166 00:07:11,209 --> 00:07:13,644 Whatever the better, cooler version of that is. 167 00:07:13,717 --> 00:07:17,419 Like, uh, maybe-maybe we should steal their school statue. 168 00:07:17,494 --> 00:07:18,894 Their school statue 169 00:07:18,965 --> 00:07:22,401 is a giant bronze of a great white shark eating a seal pup. 170 00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:25,180 It weighs three tons. 171 00:07:25,251 --> 00:07:26,585 Okay, how about this one. 172 00:07:26,654 --> 00:07:28,388 All right, we get like... 173 00:07:28,460 --> 00:07:30,194 PUCK: Everyone knows this is going to come down to me. 174 00:07:30,266 --> 00:07:33,869 Revenge, fear, the merciless infliction of pain. 175 00:07:33,943 --> 00:07:36,111 These are my kingdoms. 176 00:07:36,183 --> 00:07:39,385 First time I gave a wedgie to a kid, I was four years old. 177 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:42,195 Finn and I may still hate each other for some reason, 178 00:07:42,268 --> 00:07:45,503 but we both know that defending the honor of New Directions 179 00:07:45,578 --> 00:07:47,779 is going to be our dirty job. 180 00:07:47,852 --> 00:07:49,653 (dog barking in distance) 181 00:07:49,723 --> 00:07:51,558 (hissing) 182 00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:56,908 Yeah, I did it. 183 00:07:56,979 --> 00:07:59,314 And I'm proud. All I did was step up and be a man. 184 00:07:59,386 --> 00:08:01,120 They got what was coming to them. 185 00:08:01,191 --> 00:08:02,325 A few of my students TP'd your choir room. 186 00:08:02,394 --> 00:08:04,562 You slashed the tires on the Range Rovers 187 00:08:04,635 --> 00:08:07,203 of all 26 of my performers. 188 00:08:07,276 --> 00:08:08,443 Those were gifts for our win at Sectionals. 189 00:08:08,513 --> 00:08:09,647 That's 200 times 26 190 00:08:09,717 --> 00:08:10,917 times four equals... 191 00:08:10,988 --> 00:08:12,655 I don't have a calculator. 192 00:08:12,726 --> 00:08:14,627 I'm sorry, you bought all your kids Range Rovers? 193 00:08:14,698 --> 00:08:15,999 We have a very active booster club. 194 00:08:16,069 --> 00:08:17,270 Look, nobody got hurt. 195 00:08:17,339 --> 00:08:18,907 It was a harmless prank. 196 00:08:18,978 --> 00:08:21,013 SUE: That's what they said about a young man in Chicago 197 00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,852 in 1871, who thought he'd play a harmless prank 198 00:08:22,923 --> 00:08:25,724 on the dairy cow of one Mrs. O'Leary. 199 00:08:25,798 --> 00:08:27,465 He successfully ignited its flatulence 200 00:08:27,537 --> 00:08:28,904 and a city burned, William. 201 00:08:28,974 --> 00:08:30,508 That young terrorist went on to become 202 00:08:30,579 --> 00:08:33,381 the first gay president of the United States, 203 00:08:33,454 --> 00:08:34,521 Abraham Lincoln. Enough. 204 00:08:34,591 --> 00:08:36,459 These students have committed a felony. 205 00:08:36,530 --> 00:08:38,264 They are hereby expelled. 206 00:08:38,336 --> 00:08:42,238 Look, I don't want anyone to get expelled. 207 00:08:42,314 --> 00:08:43,982 I'm not going to press charges... 208 00:08:44,052 --> 00:08:45,953 as long as you pay for the damage. 209 00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,926 You can take it out of the glee club budget. 210 00:08:47,998 --> 00:08:49,064 That'll bankrupt the glee club. 211 00:08:49,135 --> 00:08:50,469 We don't have that kind of money. 212 00:08:50,538 --> 00:08:51,572 We'll get jobs. 213 00:08:51,642 --> 00:08:53,076 Give us a month. 214 00:08:53,147 --> 00:08:54,347 We'll pay you back, 215 00:08:54,417 --> 00:08:55,884 Ms. Corcoran, I promise. 216 00:08:55,955 --> 00:08:57,756 Fine. 217 00:08:57,827 --> 00:09:00,929 Ms. Corcoran, you are as wise and magnanimous 218 00:09:01,003 --> 00:09:02,137 as you are beautiful. 219 00:09:04,715 --> 00:09:08,251 Thank you. 220 00:09:08,325 --> 00:09:09,793 Well, you just can't win, can you, William? 221 00:09:09,863 --> 00:09:12,732 You never have, and you never will. 222 00:09:18,111 --> 00:09:20,913 Are you want to take a trip down that rabbit hole, William? 223 00:09:20,987 --> 00:09:22,854 I'm willing to try anything, Sandy. 224 00:09:22,926 --> 00:09:25,394 I'm just really depressed. 225 00:09:25,467 --> 00:09:27,301 I don't sell to the clinically depressed. 226 00:09:27,373 --> 00:09:29,140 You'll throw yourself off a parking garage 227 00:09:29,211 --> 00:09:31,479 and I can't have that on my conscience. 228 00:09:31,551 --> 00:09:33,452 I used to coach that glee club. 229 00:09:33,524 --> 00:09:35,892 I know what you're up against. 230 00:09:35,965 --> 00:09:38,933 You think Carmel High didn't put the fear of God in me? 231 00:09:39,007 --> 00:09:41,475 I don't know how we can possibly beat them. 232 00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,649 Glee is hanging by a thread. 233 00:09:43,721 --> 00:09:47,791 William, the answer is right in front of your face, 234 00:09:47,867 --> 00:09:49,768 but you can't see it because you're in 235 00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:51,073 too big of a funk. 236 00:09:51,143 --> 00:09:55,847 Vocal Adrenaline has a weakness. 237 00:09:55,925 --> 00:09:58,593 (bell ringing) 238 00:09:58,666 --> 00:10:00,133 Funk. 239 00:10:00,204 --> 00:10:01,804 Use it in a sentence. 240 00:10:01,875 --> 00:10:02,975 Come on. 241 00:10:03,046 --> 00:10:04,813 Rachel. 242 00:10:04,884 --> 00:10:07,185 This cheese smells funky. 243 00:10:07,258 --> 00:10:08,391 That's because it's "from-unda" cheese. 244 00:10:08,462 --> 00:10:09,629 Shut it, Puckerman! 245 00:10:09,699 --> 00:10:11,099 Okay, okay. 246 00:10:11,170 --> 00:10:12,937 I was thinking more along the lines of... 247 00:10:13,009 --> 00:10:15,077 Vocal Adrenaline has sure put us all in a funk. 248 00:10:15,149 --> 00:10:17,416 I'm so depressed, I've worn the same outfit twice this week. 249 00:10:17,489 --> 00:10:18,990 What if I told you 250 00:10:19,060 --> 00:10:21,228 I knew how we could shove it right back down their throats? 251 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:22,534 New Directions is about 252 00:10:22,604 --> 00:10:24,906 to make their funk the P-Funk. 253 00:10:24,977 --> 00:10:27,179 We are going to get funked up. 254 00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:29,886 The only way to do that is to beat them at Regionals. 255 00:10:29,959 --> 00:10:32,360 Vocal Adrenaline has never once done a funk number. 256 00:10:32,433 --> 00:10:34,834 They're a machine, a collective, synthesized, 257 00:10:34,907 --> 00:10:37,375 soulless beat. 258 00:10:37,448 --> 00:10:39,216 Funk is soul meets anger. 259 00:10:39,287 --> 00:10:41,188 Its passion is in its emotion. 260 00:10:41,260 --> 00:10:43,494 And Vocal Adrenaline doesn't perform with any. 261 00:10:43,567 --> 00:10:45,368 So you have your assignment. 262 00:10:45,439 --> 00:10:47,940 I want you guys to turn McKinley High into... 263 00:10:48,013 --> 00:10:49,847 * Funky town! * 264 00:10:49,919 --> 00:10:52,754 You guys can relax, I got this one covered. 265 00:10:52,828 --> 00:10:53,995 Cool. 266 00:10:54,064 --> 00:10:55,198 Hold on a second. 267 00:10:55,269 --> 00:10:56,435 I-I want a chance to get funky, too. 268 00:10:56,505 --> 00:10:57,972 (laughter) 269 00:10:59,113 --> 00:11:00,913 (laughing): Good one, Quinn. 270 00:11:00,985 --> 00:11:02,586 It even sounds funny when you say it. 271 00:11:02,658 --> 00:11:05,393 You said funk was about soul and anger. 272 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:06,799 I have plenty of both. 273 00:11:06,870 --> 00:11:08,704 Look at me. Look at my life. 274 00:11:08,776 --> 00:11:09,776 I'm furious! 275 00:11:09,845 --> 00:11:10,945 MERCEDES: Let's be honest. 276 00:11:11,015 --> 00:11:12,316 When white people try to be funky, 277 00:11:12,386 --> 00:11:15,322 you end up with KC and the Sunshine Band. 278 00:11:15,395 --> 00:11:16,429 I love "Boogie Shoes." 279 00:11:16,498 --> 00:11:18,199 Mercedes' racism aside, 280 00:11:18,271 --> 00:11:20,906 I will have something prepared tomorrow. 281 00:11:20,978 --> 00:11:22,746 All right, Quinn goes first. 282 00:11:23,787 --> 00:11:25,922 (bell ringing) 283 00:11:27,565 --> 00:11:30,233 Rachel, can I see you in my office? 284 00:11:31,577 --> 00:11:33,978 You seem to be taking this Jessie thing pretty hard. 285 00:11:34,051 --> 00:11:36,319 I want him to be eaten by a lion. 286 00:11:36,392 --> 00:11:37,859 (sighs) Jessie, cared about you. 287 00:11:37,929 --> 00:11:39,330 No, he didn't. 288 00:11:39,401 --> 00:11:42,002 Our entire relationship was just some diabolical plan. 289 00:11:42,075 --> 00:11:43,842 They knew if they broke my heart 290 00:11:43,914 --> 00:11:44,914 close enough to the competition, 291 00:11:44,984 --> 00:11:46,618 that I'd lose my will to live, 292 00:11:46,688 --> 00:11:48,489 and then New Directions would have no chance 293 00:11:48,561 --> 00:11:49,828 at winning Regionals. 294 00:11:49,899 --> 00:11:51,733 It's textbook; You destroy the heart 295 00:11:51,804 --> 00:11:54,505 of the team's heart and you destroy the team. 296 00:11:54,579 --> 00:11:56,647 WILL: Sandy told me how to beat Vocal Adrenaline, 297 00:11:56,718 --> 00:11:58,486 and now Rachel was inadvertently telling me 298 00:11:58,558 --> 00:12:00,992 how to beat my other nemesis. 299 00:12:01,065 --> 00:12:04,134 Suddenly, I wasn't feeling nearly as depressed. 300 00:12:04,208 --> 00:12:05,942 (playing tentative melody) 301 00:12:06,013 --> 00:12:08,648 William, I'm gonna have to ask you to clear out. 302 00:12:08,721 --> 00:12:10,255 I received an anonymous tip from someone 303 00:12:10,326 --> 00:12:11,993 who wants to meet me here 304 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,599 to discuss an illegal Hot Cheetos ring. 305 00:12:13,669 --> 00:12:15,003 Hot Cheetos have been proven 306 00:12:15,074 --> 00:12:17,442 to raise endorphins, which makes for happy kids, 307 00:12:17,515 --> 00:12:18,615 and I can't have that. 308 00:12:18,684 --> 00:12:19,784 Yeah, no worries, Sue. 309 00:12:19,854 --> 00:12:21,088 I'll just find someplace else to... 310 00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:23,560 Oh, wow. 311 00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:24,232 What? 312 00:12:24,301 --> 00:12:26,002 It-it's nothing. 313 00:12:26,073 --> 00:12:28,608 It's just... it's just the way the light hit you 314 00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:30,715 just now, you looked stunning. 315 00:12:32,091 --> 00:12:34,226 No, you're radiant. 316 00:12:34,298 --> 00:12:35,698 Well, the week before Nationals every year, 317 00:12:35,769 --> 00:12:37,303 I have a placenta mask 318 00:12:37,373 --> 00:12:40,108 right after a rigorous session of microdermabrasion. 319 00:12:40,182 --> 00:12:43,217 Well, whatever you're doing, keep it up 320 00:12:43,291 --> 00:12:46,660 because you have never looked better. 321 00:12:49,476 --> 00:12:51,877 Well, if you'll excuse me, I should... 322 00:12:51,950 --> 00:12:53,317 I got stuff to do, so... Yeah, um... 323 00:12:53,388 --> 00:12:56,490 Look, Sue, I gotta ask your advice about something. 324 00:12:56,564 --> 00:12:59,532 I know I make it seem like I-I know what I'm doing, 325 00:12:59,606 --> 00:13:01,474 but everyone knows 326 00:13:01,545 --> 00:13:02,746 you're the kingmaker around here. 327 00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:03,883 I mean, you're this school's 328 00:13:03,953 --> 00:13:05,053 arbiter of taste. Continue. 329 00:13:05,123 --> 00:13:06,490 We're doing this funk number for Regionals, 330 00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:08,094 and I wanted to pick your brain about it. 331 00:13:08,166 --> 00:13:10,901 I-I just wanted to know if it's too suggestive. 332 00:13:10,974 --> 00:13:12,875 And I only need two minutes of your time. 333 00:13:12,946 --> 00:13:14,681 Okay. 334 00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:17,320 ("Tell Me Something Good" plays) 335 00:13:23,779 --> 00:13:33,488 * You ain't got no kind of feeling insi-ide * 336 00:13:33,575 --> 00:13:36,376 * Oh, whoa-oa-oa * 337 00:13:36,450 --> 00:13:38,218 * And I got something * 338 00:13:38,289 --> 00:13:44,361 * That will sure 'nuff set your stuff on fire * 339 00:13:44,441 --> 00:13:45,741 * Oh, oh-oh * 340 00:13:48,318 --> 00:13:54,724 * You refuse to put anything before your pride * 341 00:13:56,477 --> 00:13:57,844 * Oh, oh-oh... * 342 00:14:00,121 --> 00:14:06,159 * What I got will knock all your pride aside * 343 00:14:08,847 --> 00:14:11,748 * Tell me something good * 344 00:14:14,931 --> 00:14:18,467 * Tell me that you love me, yeah * 345 00:14:20,281 --> 00:14:24,317 * Tell me something good * 346 00:14:24,393 --> 00:14:26,694 * Tell me, tell me, tell me * 347 00:14:26,767 --> 00:14:30,503 * That you like it, yeah * 348 00:14:33,287 --> 00:14:40,726 * "Got no time" is what you're known to say-ay * 349 00:14:44,721 --> 00:14:46,155 * Tell me something good * 350 00:14:46,225 --> 00:14:50,862 * Oh, tell me, oh, tell me, yeah-eah! * 351 00:14:50,939 --> 00:14:53,074 * Tell me that you love me, yeah * 352 00:14:53,146 --> 00:14:56,415 * I like it, I like it, yeah-eah * 353 00:14:56,489 --> 00:14:59,191 * Tell me something good! * 354 00:14:59,264 --> 00:15:00,365 (song ends) 355 00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:02,068 So... 356 00:15:02,140 --> 00:15:03,607 you feel anything there? 357 00:15:03,678 --> 00:15:05,278 No. 358 00:15:05,349 --> 00:15:07,450 Was I... 359 00:15:07,522 --> 00:15:08,589 too dirty? 360 00:15:08,659 --> 00:15:10,227 I didn't notice. I was bored. 361 00:15:12,872 --> 00:15:14,706 Okay. 362 00:15:26,598 --> 00:15:29,233 Right, left, and flip, okay? 363 00:15:29,306 --> 00:15:30,740 Can I go shirtless under this apron? 364 00:15:30,811 --> 00:15:33,045 Look, I only hired you two losers 365 00:15:33,117 --> 00:15:35,218 because I'm desperate to increase my quarterly sales 366 00:15:35,291 --> 00:15:36,658 and you'll work for less than immigrants. 367 00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:38,528 As I'm you know, 368 00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:40,268 Mr. Schuester and I are now officially divorced. 369 00:15:40,339 --> 00:15:42,874 I mean, I'm sure he talks about it all the time. 370 00:15:44,083 --> 00:15:47,352 Anyway, I'm on my own now. 371 00:15:47,427 --> 00:15:50,629 And I need to make manager by the end of the year 372 00:15:50,703 --> 00:15:53,138 so that I can maintain my lifestyle. 373 00:15:53,210 --> 00:15:55,845 Terri, that guy who gave me Bell's palsy is 374 00:15:55,919 --> 00:15:57,253 back again today. 375 00:15:57,323 --> 00:15:58,256 So... 376 00:15:58,326 --> 00:15:59,759 help him. 377 00:15:59,830 --> 00:16:01,397 He's our best customer. 378 00:16:03,374 --> 00:16:04,774 You need to go help him. 379 00:16:04,845 --> 00:16:06,879 But she just told you to do it. 380 00:16:06,952 --> 00:16:08,619 I have got seniority over you two losers, 381 00:16:08,690 --> 00:16:10,691 which means you have to do what I say. 382 00:16:10,763 --> 00:16:12,330 Well, then I need to kick your ass. 383 00:16:12,401 --> 00:16:14,001 MAN: Bamboo...! 384 00:16:17,349 --> 00:16:20,017 You two... apron boys. 385 00:16:21,261 --> 00:16:23,829 You're not gonna fondle us, are you, Mr. Ryerson? 386 00:16:23,902 --> 00:16:25,836 I've recently redone my bathroom 387 00:16:25,908 --> 00:16:27,942 as an homage to Miss Jayne Mansfield. 388 00:16:28,984 --> 00:16:31,051 Pink! It's all pink! 389 00:16:31,124 --> 00:16:32,658 This is amaranth pink. 390 00:16:32,729 --> 00:16:33,929 I need rose pink. 391 00:16:33,999 --> 00:16:36,967 But this is all the pink that we have. 392 00:16:37,042 --> 00:16:38,476 Wrong answer. 393 00:16:38,547 --> 00:16:41,348 Did they change the name of this place to Losers N' Things? 394 00:16:41,421 --> 00:16:42,955 Did everyone in 395 00:16:43,026 --> 00:16:44,660 the whole world die so they had 396 00:16:44,731 --> 00:16:46,666 to give these jobs to you two morons? 397 00:16:46,737 --> 00:16:48,171 And where's my Muzak?! 398 00:16:48,242 --> 00:16:50,877 How am I supposed to shop without my Kenny G? 399 00:16:50,950 --> 00:16:53,351 (clapping hands) Let's go! 400 00:16:55,095 --> 00:16:55,928 Crank it! 401 00:16:58,807 --> 00:17:00,774 ("Loser" bluesy intro playing) 402 00:17:06,196 --> 00:17:09,698 * In the time of chimpanzees, I was a monkey * 403 00:17:09,773 --> 00:17:12,475 * Butane in my veins and I'm out to cut the junkie * 404 00:17:12,548 --> 00:17:15,483 * With the plastic eyeballs, spray-paint the vegetables * 405 00:17:15,557 --> 00:17:18,792 * Dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose * 406 00:17:18,867 --> 00:17:21,368 * Kill the headlights and put it in neutral * 407 00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:24,143 * Stock car flamin' with a loser and the cruise control * 408 00:17:24,215 --> 00:17:25,716 * Baby's in Reno with the Vitamin D * 409 00:17:25,788 --> 00:17:29,624 * Got a couple of couches, sleep on the love seat * 410 00:17:29,699 --> 00:17:31,299 * Someone keeps saying I'm insane * 411 00:17:31,371 --> 00:17:33,305 * To complain about a shotgun wedding * 412 00:17:33,377 --> 00:17:35,612 * And a stain on my shirt * 413 00:17:35,683 --> 00:17:37,718 * Don't believe everything that you breathe * 414 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:40,759 * You get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve * 415 00:17:40,833 --> 00:17:43,601 * So shave your face with some mace in the dark * 416 00:17:43,674 --> 00:17:45,041 * Savin' all your food stamps * 417 00:17:45,112 --> 00:17:47,246 * Aand burnin' down the trailer park * 418 00:17:47,319 --> 00:17:48,219 Yo. 419 00:17:49,492 --> 00:17:51,259 HOWARD: Cut it. 420 00:17:51,330 --> 00:17:56,701 * Soy, un perdedor * 421 00:17:56,780 --> 00:18:00,049 * I'm a loser, baby * 422 00:18:00,123 --> 00:18:02,024 * So why don't you kill me? * 423 00:18:02,096 --> 00:18:03,363 * So why don't you kill me? * 424 00:18:03,434 --> 00:18:05,868 (song stops, soft Muzak plays) 425 00:18:05,941 --> 00:18:07,575 (sighs) 426 00:18:11,323 --> 00:18:14,392 I thought Jews were supposed to be smart. 427 00:18:14,467 --> 00:18:16,634 (sighs) 428 00:18:16,706 --> 00:18:19,441 Go restack the space heaters. 429 00:18:22,958 --> 00:18:24,258 Mrs. Schuester, 430 00:18:24,329 --> 00:18:27,464 can you show me how to fold this sham again? 431 00:18:29,077 --> 00:18:30,444 Mrs. Schuester? 432 00:18:30,515 --> 00:18:32,215 Oh. I'm sorry. 433 00:18:32,286 --> 00:18:33,853 Yes, sure. Of course. 434 00:18:35,530 --> 00:18:37,731 How old are you? 435 00:18:37,803 --> 00:18:39,403 Sixteen. 436 00:18:39,474 --> 00:18:41,809 Oh. 437 00:18:43,821 --> 00:18:45,555 SUE: Dear Journal, 438 00:18:45,626 --> 00:18:47,961 Something strange happened yesterday. 439 00:18:48,033 --> 00:18:50,734 I felt something below the neck. 440 00:18:50,808 --> 00:18:53,076 Dare I admit it? 441 00:18:53,149 --> 00:18:55,417 I have feelings for one Will Schuester. 442 00:18:55,488 --> 00:18:58,357 Sexy, non-murdering feelings. 443 00:18:58,431 --> 00:19:00,498 Oh, it all makes sense now, Journal. 444 00:19:00,570 --> 00:19:04,206 True love always springs from true hate. 445 00:19:04,282 --> 00:19:06,350 I'll admit, in the past, I've fantasized about waking up 446 00:19:06,421 --> 00:19:08,522 with Will's head on the pillow next to me, 447 00:19:08,594 --> 00:19:10,629 except now I picture it 448 00:19:10,701 --> 00:19:12,502 attached to the rest of his body. 449 00:19:12,573 --> 00:19:13,273 (knocking) 450 00:19:13,342 --> 00:19:15,877 Sue, you got a sec? 451 00:19:15,950 --> 00:19:17,350 Yes, William. How can I help you? 452 00:19:17,421 --> 00:19:20,223 I, uh, I wanted to bring you these. 453 00:19:20,297 --> 00:19:22,998 I snuck a peek at your tracksuit this morning, 454 00:19:23,071 --> 00:19:24,505 and I got these to match. 455 00:19:24,575 --> 00:19:25,909 Those are cheap gas station flowers. 456 00:19:25,980 --> 00:19:27,047 I-I have no interest. 457 00:19:27,116 --> 00:19:29,117 Okay. 458 00:19:29,189 --> 00:19:32,291 But I also got you these. 459 00:19:32,366 --> 00:19:35,802 A tub of Extreme Challenge Lifestyle CarboGels. 460 00:19:35,876 --> 00:19:38,812 I had to drive to Dayton to get your favorite flavor. 461 00:19:38,885 --> 00:19:41,587 Appletini. Appletini. 462 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,369 I don't get it either, Sue, 463 00:19:46,441 --> 00:19:49,010 but you can't deny that we have chemistry. 464 00:19:49,082 --> 00:19:52,818 My divorce opened my eyes to a world of possibilities. 465 00:19:52,894 --> 00:19:54,495 I thought I'd finally have the chance 466 00:19:54,565 --> 00:19:57,267 to have all the things I'd ever wanted. 467 00:19:57,340 --> 00:19:59,141 And then I realized, 468 00:19:59,212 --> 00:20:01,981 the only thing I want... 469 00:20:02,055 --> 00:20:03,355 is Sue. 470 00:20:07,203 --> 00:20:09,204 You have Nationals 471 00:20:09,276 --> 00:20:11,243 this Saturday, right? Why do you ask? 472 00:20:11,315 --> 00:20:16,486 Because I'd like to take you to dinner this week. 473 00:20:16,565 --> 00:20:17,598 How's Wednesday night? 474 00:20:17,668 --> 00:20:19,235 Breadstix? 475 00:20:20,442 --> 00:20:21,843 Yeah. 476 00:20:21,913 --> 00:20:24,748 Good. 477 00:20:24,822 --> 00:20:26,823 Oh... 478 00:20:26,895 --> 00:20:28,429 You know what Wednesday is, right? 479 00:20:31,108 --> 00:20:33,343 Hump day. 480 00:20:44,421 --> 00:20:45,688 I'm sorry, Mrs. Schuester, 481 00:20:45,759 --> 00:20:47,226 my heart's not in this. 482 00:20:47,297 --> 00:20:49,298 This whole Vocal Adrenaline thing's really getting me down, 483 00:20:49,369 --> 00:20:51,737 and we have to come up with this funk number for Glee, 484 00:20:51,810 --> 00:20:53,878 and I have like, less-than-zero ideas, and I... 485 00:20:53,950 --> 00:20:55,250 Glee?! 486 00:20:55,956 --> 00:20:57,690 God! 487 00:20:57,761 --> 00:20:59,429 This club is like toxic mold on my life. 488 00:21:01,940 --> 00:21:03,874 I'm sorry. 489 00:21:05,852 --> 00:21:07,653 What am I doing? 490 00:21:07,725 --> 00:21:10,460 This is exactly how I destroyed my marriage. 491 00:21:10,532 --> 00:21:14,369 I have this compulsive need to crush other people's dreams. 492 00:21:14,444 --> 00:21:15,611 Yeah, that's what Mr. Shue said. 493 00:21:16,550 --> 00:21:19,119 I mean, I think you're awesome, though. 494 00:21:19,192 --> 00:21:20,326 I mean, look how hard you've been working 495 00:21:20,396 --> 00:21:23,765 to try and help me fold a sham. Well... 496 00:21:23,839 --> 00:21:25,940 And you'd be a total MILF 497 00:21:26,012 --> 00:21:27,379 if it weren't for the whole faking-the-mother thing. 498 00:21:29,891 --> 00:21:30,724 You're very sweet. 499 00:21:32,097 --> 00:21:33,864 You could be my second chance. 500 00:21:35,073 --> 00:21:36,540 I'm gonna change. 501 00:21:36,610 --> 00:21:38,545 I don't have to stay in 502 00:21:38,616 --> 00:21:40,117 this post-divorce funk forever, right? 503 00:21:40,188 --> 00:21:42,689 Yeah. Yeah, right, I guess. 504 00:21:42,762 --> 00:21:44,029 Well, then I am going to help you 505 00:21:44,100 --> 00:21:44,933 with your Glee assignment. 506 00:21:45,939 --> 00:21:47,606 (chuckles) 507 00:21:47,677 --> 00:21:49,845 Okay, you said you needed a funk song, right? 508 00:21:49,917 --> 00:21:52,752 Yeah. Okay, so, 509 00:21:52,825 --> 00:21:54,926 we'll type "funk" into the iTunes, 510 00:21:54,999 --> 00:21:56,399 and we'll see what comes up. 511 00:21:56,470 --> 00:21:58,138 I never thought of that. 512 00:21:58,208 --> 00:22:00,476 Oh, Howard, I'm promoting Finn 513 00:22:00,549 --> 00:22:02,550 to assistant assistant manager. 514 00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:04,422 You'll report to him from now on. 515 00:22:04,494 --> 00:22:06,128 Do you have a problem with that? 516 00:22:06,199 --> 00:22:08,033 (sighs) 517 00:22:09,876 --> 00:22:11,477 Wow, thanks. 518 00:22:11,549 --> 00:22:13,349 I believe in you, Finn. 519 00:22:16,664 --> 00:22:18,431 (bell ringing) Okay, Quinn, 520 00:22:18,503 --> 00:22:20,804 it's your day to show us your funky side. 521 00:22:20,876 --> 00:22:22,109 So, take it away. 522 00:22:22,180 --> 00:22:24,882 For some of us... 523 00:22:26,025 --> 00:22:27,993 ...just simply getting to class 524 00:22:28,065 --> 00:22:29,498 takes a little bit longer. 525 00:22:29,569 --> 00:22:31,470 When you're pregnant, 526 00:22:31,542 --> 00:22:33,643 you're responsible for two lives. 527 00:22:33,715 --> 00:22:35,816 And you're walking down the hallway 528 00:22:35,887 --> 00:22:37,788 oppressed by the man. 529 00:22:37,860 --> 00:22:39,861 Oh, my goodness, she is not about to go there. 530 00:22:39,933 --> 00:22:41,400 Hearing people call you fat. 531 00:22:42,274 --> 00:22:43,841 Sometimes it hurts. 532 00:22:43,911 --> 00:22:47,648 Sometimes you have to stop 533 00:22:47,723 --> 00:22:50,659 and hold that precious life and say no. 534 00:22:50,732 --> 00:22:51,966 This is offensive. 535 00:22:52,036 --> 00:22:53,236 Who are these girls? 536 00:22:53,307 --> 00:22:55,107 We're the "Unwed Mothership Connection." 537 00:22:55,179 --> 00:22:58,181 And that's what we're here to sing about. 538 00:22:58,255 --> 00:23:01,223 ("It's a Man's Man's Man's World" playing) 539 00:23:04,206 --> 00:23:06,307 * This is a man's world * 540 00:23:09,856 --> 00:23:11,890 * This is a man's world * 541 00:23:15,406 --> 00:23:18,742 * But it wouldn't be nothing * 542 00:23:18,816 --> 00:23:21,785 * Nothing * 543 00:23:21,859 --> 00:23:26,028 * Without a woman or a girl * 544 00:23:26,104 --> 00:23:30,408 * Ooh, ooh, ooh * 545 00:23:30,484 --> 00:23:32,952 * You see * 546 00:23:33,025 --> 00:23:35,493 * Man made the cars * 547 00:23:35,566 --> 00:23:37,400 * Ah * 548 00:23:37,472 --> 00:23:39,840 * To take us over the road * 549 00:23:39,913 --> 00:23:41,480 * Ah * 550 00:23:41,551 --> 00:23:46,421 * Man made the train * 551 00:23:46,499 --> 00:23:49,301 * To carry the heavy loads * 552 00:23:51,246 --> 00:23:55,216 * Man made the boat for the water * 553 00:23:55,291 --> 00:23:59,495 * Like Noah made the ark * 554 00:23:59,571 --> 00:24:04,408 * This is a man's, man's, man's world * 555 00:24:04,486 --> 00:24:07,588 * But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing * 556 00:24:07,662 --> 00:24:10,664 * Without a woman or a girl * He-he-he-hoo-hoo-hoo. 557 00:24:10,738 --> 00:24:15,074 * Without a woman or a girl * 558 00:24:15,151 --> 00:24:18,587 He-he-he-hoo-hoo-hoo. 559 00:24:18,662 --> 00:24:22,531 * Man thinks about a little baby girls * 560 00:24:23,743 --> 00:24:26,178 * And the baby boys * 561 00:24:26,251 --> 00:24:32,790 * And after man make everything, everything he can * 562 00:24:34,543 --> 00:24:36,477 * You know that man makes money * 563 00:24:36,549 --> 00:24:37,916 * He makes money * 564 00:24:37,986 --> 00:24:41,521 * To buy from other man * 565 00:24:41,597 --> 00:24:43,798 * To buy from other man * 566 00:24:43,870 --> 00:24:47,239 * This is a man's world * 567 00:24:47,314 --> 00:24:51,117 * But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing * 568 00:24:51,192 --> 00:24:53,527 * Not one little thing * * Nothing * 569 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:56,268 * Without a woman or a girl * 570 00:24:58,046 --> 00:24:59,613 * Ooh * 571 00:24:59,685 --> 00:25:02,620 * He's lost * 572 00:25:02,694 --> 00:25:05,429 * In bitterness * * Ooh * 573 00:25:07,541 --> 00:25:08,441 * Ooh * 574 00:25:08,510 --> 00:25:10,678 * He's lost * 575 00:25:10,751 --> 00:25:12,885 * Lost somewhere * * Ooh * 576 00:25:15,766 --> 00:25:20,470 * In loneliness. * 577 00:25:20,546 --> 00:25:22,114 (song ends) 578 00:25:36,494 --> 00:25:38,462 You're going to have to order something. 579 00:25:38,534 --> 00:25:40,268 My date will be here any minute. 580 00:25:40,339 --> 00:25:41,940 Your date's not coming. 581 00:25:42,011 --> 00:25:43,478 You got stood up. 582 00:25:52,709 --> 00:25:54,643 (audience cheering on TV) (pounding on door) 583 00:25:54,715 --> 00:25:56,716 Right on time. 584 00:25:56,788 --> 00:25:57,988 (rapid knocking) 585 00:25:58,059 --> 00:25:59,726 How dare you?! 586 00:25:59,797 --> 00:26:01,197 You led me on. 587 00:26:01,268 --> 00:26:02,835 You told me you had feelings for me, 588 00:26:02,907 --> 00:26:04,274 then you ask me out, you don't show up, 589 00:26:04,344 --> 00:26:06,078 humiliating me. In public. 590 00:26:06,149 --> 00:26:08,117 Gosh, Sue, I wonder where I learned how to do all that. 591 00:26:08,189 --> 00:26:10,323 You meddled around in my marriage, 592 00:26:10,396 --> 00:26:11,963 you terrorize the glee club, 593 00:26:12,034 --> 00:26:14,135 you continue to sabotage my relationship with Emma. 594 00:26:14,207 --> 00:26:16,675 I tried playing nice, but nothing seems to work with you. 595 00:26:16,748 --> 00:26:17,881 Cruelty was the only way 596 00:26:17,952 --> 00:26:19,586 to get your attention. 597 00:26:19,657 --> 00:26:22,191 I have no interest in dating you, Sue. 598 00:26:22,264 --> 00:26:24,065 You're a bully and you're mean to kids. 599 00:26:24,137 --> 00:26:25,504 I'm mean to everyone. 600 00:26:25,574 --> 00:26:27,175 Yeah, well, fine. 601 00:26:27,246 --> 00:26:30,648 Consider this a little taste of what you love dishing out. 602 00:26:30,723 --> 00:26:33,458 Now, if you'll excuse me. 603 00:26:33,532 --> 00:26:36,854 This is uncalled for, William. 604 00:26:36,895 --> 00:26:38,947 (sighs) Good night, Sue. 605 00:26:44,121 --> 00:26:46,689 (mutters) Santana, are you all right? 606 00:26:46,762 --> 00:26:48,363 What...? 607 00:26:48,434 --> 00:26:50,268 (sobbing) 608 00:26:55,555 --> 00:26:58,056 Kurt, what is going on around here? 609 00:26:58,130 --> 00:27:00,164 Coach Sylvester won't get out of bed. 610 00:27:00,236 --> 00:27:01,903 We haven't had practice in days. 611 00:27:01,974 --> 00:27:03,441 I'm fine because I have Glee, 612 00:27:03,512 --> 00:27:05,947 but these girls have sort of lost it. 613 00:27:06,019 --> 00:27:07,620 No Nationals means that four of the girls 614 00:27:07,692 --> 00:27:09,059 will lose their college scholarships. 615 00:27:09,128 --> 00:27:10,996 And the rest are just depressed and confused. 616 00:27:11,068 --> 00:27:12,735 Please, please, love me, please. 617 00:27:14,311 --> 00:27:17,881 It's really hard to feel bad for Sue Sylvester-- 618 00:27:17,955 --> 00:27:19,756 she doesn't need another trophy-- 619 00:27:19,828 --> 00:27:22,396 but some of these girls, they really do. 620 00:27:26,447 --> 00:27:28,382 FINN: Mr. Shue, 621 00:27:28,453 --> 00:27:30,021 Puck and I would like to show the class 622 00:27:30,091 --> 00:27:31,058 the true meaning of funk. 623 00:27:31,128 --> 00:27:32,795 With a little help 624 00:27:32,867 --> 00:27:34,901 from our special guest Mercedes. 625 00:27:34,973 --> 00:27:36,073 Whoo. Yeah. 626 00:27:36,143 --> 00:27:37,743 Fasten your seat belts, people. 627 00:27:37,815 --> 00:27:39,716 It's going to be a funky ride. 628 00:27:39,788 --> 00:27:41,288 ("Good Vibrations" by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch playing) 629 00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:42,292 * Yeah * 630 00:27:42,362 --> 00:27:44,964 * Can you feel it, baby? * 631 00:27:45,036 --> 00:27:46,604 * Come on, swing it * 632 00:27:46,674 --> 00:27:48,575 * Come-come on, swing it * 633 00:27:48,647 --> 00:27:51,015 * Come on, swing it * 634 00:27:51,088 --> 00:27:52,521 * Come-come on, swing it * 635 00:27:52,592 --> 00:27:54,693 * Yo, it's about that time * 636 00:27:54,765 --> 00:27:56,265 * To bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme * 637 00:27:56,337 --> 00:27:58,639 * I'm gonna get mine, so get yours * 638 00:27:58,710 --> 00:28:00,511 * I want to see sweat comin' out your pores * 639 00:28:00,583 --> 00:28:02,384 * On the house tip is how I'm swingin' this * 640 00:28:02,455 --> 00:28:04,056 * Strictly hip-hop, boy, I ain't singing this * 641 00:28:04,127 --> 00:28:06,928 * Bringing this to the entire nation * 642 00:28:07,002 --> 00:28:10,004 * Black, white, red, brown, feel the vibration * * Vibration * 643 00:28:10,078 --> 00:28:11,445 * Come on, feel the vibration * * Vibration * 644 00:28:11,516 --> 00:28:15,452 * It's such a good vibration * 645 00:28:15,528 --> 00:28:20,265 * It's such a sweet sensation * 646 00:28:20,341 --> 00:28:22,443 * The vibrations good like Sunkist * 647 00:28:22,515 --> 00:28:24,316 * Many wanna know who done this * 648 00:28:24,387 --> 00:28:26,088 * Pucky Puck and I'm here to move you * 649 00:28:26,159 --> 00:28:28,728 * Rhymes will groove you and I'm here to prove to you * 650 00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:30,534 * That we can party on the positive side * 651 00:28:30,606 --> 00:28:32,040 * And pump positive vibes, so come along for the ride * 652 00:28:32,111 --> 00:28:34,779 * Making you feel the rhythm is my occupation * 653 00:28:34,852 --> 00:28:36,519 * So feel the vibration * * Vibration * 654 00:28:36,591 --> 00:28:38,759 * Come on, feel the vibration * * Vibration * 655 00:28:38,830 --> 00:28:42,366 * It's such a good vibration * 656 00:28:42,441 --> 00:28:46,344 * It's such a sweet sensation * 657 00:28:46,419 --> 00:28:47,686 Finnie D, break it down. 658 00:28:47,757 --> 00:28:49,191 * Down, down, down, down * 659 00:28:52,404 --> 00:28:53,838 * Finnie D's on the back up * 660 00:28:53,909 --> 00:28:56,377 * Drug free, so put the crack up * 661 00:28:56,449 --> 00:28:59,518 * No need for speed, I'm the anti D-R-U-G-G-I-E * 662 00:28:59,592 --> 00:29:01,459 * My body is healthy, my rhymes make me wealthy * 663 00:29:01,531 --> 00:29:04,500 * And the Funky Bunch helps me * 664 00:29:04,574 --> 00:29:06,374 * To bring you a show with no intoxication * 665 00:29:06,446 --> 00:29:09,682 * Come on, and feel the vibration * * Vibration * 666 00:29:09,756 --> 00:29:10,923 * Yeah * 667 00:29:10,993 --> 00:29:13,061 * Can you feel it, baby? * 668 00:29:13,132 --> 00:29:14,900 * I can, too * 669 00:29:14,972 --> 00:29:17,240 * It's such a good vibration * 670 00:29:18,683 --> 00:29:21,919 * It's such a sweet sensation * 671 00:29:21,993 --> 00:29:24,728 * It's such a good vibration. * 672 00:29:24,801 --> 00:29:26,435 (song ends, applause and whoops) 673 00:29:26,506 --> 00:29:28,307 WILL: All right. 674 00:29:28,379 --> 00:29:30,413 Great job, guys, but that's not funk. 675 00:29:30,485 --> 00:29:31,585 I mean, the group is called 676 00:29:31,655 --> 00:29:32,788 Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, 677 00:29:32,859 --> 00:29:33,959 but that is a rap song. 678 00:29:34,029 --> 00:29:36,030 A kick-butt old school rap song. 679 00:29:36,101 --> 00:29:38,269 ARTIE: Does it really matter, Mr. Shue? 680 00:29:38,342 --> 00:29:41,444 We're so clinically depressed, we're doing the wrong songs. 681 00:29:41,518 --> 00:29:43,385 We're in a deeper funk than ever. 682 00:29:50,946 --> 00:29:53,748 Mercedes, 683 00:29:53,822 --> 00:29:55,589 I'm so sorry. 684 00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:56,960 You may not be a minority, 685 00:29:57,031 --> 00:29:59,532 but you certainly get how it feels sometimes. 686 00:29:59,605 --> 00:30:01,306 For nine months. 687 00:30:01,378 --> 00:30:02,945 You've had to deal with this 688 00:30:03,016 --> 00:30:06,084 your whole life. 689 00:30:06,158 --> 00:30:09,394 People making assumptions, calling you names. 690 00:30:09,468 --> 00:30:13,038 I seriously can't understand why don't feel like 691 00:30:13,112 --> 00:30:14,679 yelling at people all the time. 692 00:30:14,750 --> 00:30:17,118 What's the point in getting angry? 693 00:30:17,191 --> 00:30:18,691 Because it's infuriating. 694 00:30:18,762 --> 00:30:21,264 I hate all the looks at school. 695 00:30:21,336 --> 00:30:24,472 Don't even get me started on Puck's mom. 696 00:30:24,547 --> 00:30:26,648 You're not angry. 697 00:30:26,719 --> 00:30:28,220 You're hurt. 698 00:30:28,291 --> 00:30:29,724 You just need someplace safe 699 00:30:29,795 --> 00:30:31,463 where you can dig through all that rage. 700 00:30:31,534 --> 00:30:34,369 Get to the pain beneath it. 701 00:30:34,442 --> 00:30:35,776 So it's decided. 702 00:30:35,847 --> 00:30:37,280 Saturday you move out of Puck's house 703 00:30:37,351 --> 00:30:39,152 and you move in with me. 704 00:30:40,995 --> 00:30:43,063 I already talked to my mom about it. 705 00:30:43,136 --> 00:30:46,004 My brother went off to college and we have an extra room. 706 00:30:46,078 --> 00:30:47,745 Mercedes... 707 00:30:47,816 --> 00:30:49,617 It's cool. 708 00:30:49,688 --> 00:30:52,223 Us sisters got to stick together, right? 709 00:30:53,332 --> 00:30:55,867 (chuckles) 710 00:30:56,910 --> 00:30:59,411 (both laughing softly) 711 00:31:00,755 --> 00:31:01,955 (doorbell rings) 712 00:31:05,067 --> 00:31:07,068 Mr. Schuester? Yes. 713 00:31:07,141 --> 00:31:08,575 Come in. Thank you. 714 00:31:10,217 --> 00:31:13,385 Um, is she doing okay? 715 00:31:13,459 --> 00:31:15,694 Never seen her like this. 716 00:31:15,766 --> 00:31:18,168 She won't leave her room, and refuses her protein shakes. 717 00:31:18,241 --> 00:31:20,041 Bad. 718 00:31:20,112 --> 00:31:22,480 Very bad. Well, please, tell her I'd love to speak with her. 719 00:31:22,553 --> 00:31:24,220 Let me ask. 720 00:31:24,292 --> 00:31:25,525 Thank you. 721 00:31:28,337 --> 00:31:29,604 Careful. 722 00:31:29,674 --> 00:31:31,275 That Regionals '85. 723 00:31:31,346 --> 00:31:33,014 Very precious to Ms. Sue. 724 00:31:33,084 --> 00:31:34,118 Sorry. 725 00:31:36,561 --> 00:31:38,362 Mija, Mr. Schuester is here. 726 00:31:38,434 --> 00:31:39,968 SUE: Okay. Okay. 727 00:31:41,142 --> 00:31:42,676 She agreed to see you. 728 00:31:42,746 --> 00:31:44,447 Oh, gracias por tu ayuda. 729 00:31:44,519 --> 00:31:45,452 De Nada. 730 00:31:51,105 --> 00:31:53,340 (knocking) 731 00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:55,480 So have you come to gloat? 732 00:31:55,552 --> 00:31:58,821 I, uh... 733 00:31:58,895 --> 00:32:01,230 I hear you're pulling out of Nationals, Sue. 734 00:32:01,302 --> 00:32:02,769 You know, for some of your girls 735 00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:05,441 that's going to have some really big consequences. 736 00:32:05,515 --> 00:32:06,715 I'm tired of those kids. 737 00:32:06,785 --> 00:32:08,052 I devoted my life to them. 738 00:32:08,123 --> 00:32:10,057 And what have I got to show for it? 739 00:32:10,129 --> 00:32:13,931 Five consecutive National championships. 740 00:32:14,007 --> 00:32:15,741 Oh, big deal. 741 00:32:15,812 --> 00:32:18,046 I'm alone, William. 742 00:32:18,119 --> 00:32:20,254 I don't even like you and I was willing 743 00:32:20,325 --> 00:32:22,193 to jump at the chance to be with you. 744 00:32:22,265 --> 00:32:26,201 And, you know, for a second, 745 00:32:26,277 --> 00:32:28,178 I saw a flash of something. 746 00:32:28,249 --> 00:32:29,950 I pictured myself 747 00:32:30,022 --> 00:32:33,291 living a normal life. 748 00:32:33,364 --> 00:32:35,599 Having someone to come home to every night. 749 00:32:38,714 --> 00:32:42,083 And though I completely loathe you, 750 00:32:42,158 --> 00:32:44,793 you'd make a great trophy husband. 751 00:32:44,866 --> 00:32:46,333 And as you can see 752 00:32:46,403 --> 00:32:49,506 by my decor, I love me some trophies. 753 00:32:49,580 --> 00:32:52,349 Sue, I did what I did to you out of anger. 754 00:32:52,421 --> 00:32:53,855 I thought destroying you 755 00:32:53,926 --> 00:32:56,628 would pull me out of my funk. 756 00:32:56,701 --> 00:33:00,471 But... just made things worse. 757 00:33:00,546 --> 00:33:03,981 So is that an apology? 758 00:33:04,056 --> 00:33:06,224 Yes, it is. 759 00:33:06,297 --> 00:33:08,798 And you're not alone, Sue. 760 00:33:08,871 --> 00:33:11,105 Your kids need you, 761 00:33:11,178 --> 00:33:13,179 so you do have love in your life. 762 00:33:13,251 --> 00:33:15,552 My kids don't love me; They fear me. 763 00:33:15,624 --> 00:33:17,658 But you love them, Sue. 764 00:33:23,448 --> 00:33:25,882 Hand me my bullhorn, will you? 765 00:33:29,767 --> 00:33:32,102 (feedback squeals) 766 00:33:32,173 --> 00:33:33,774 Amelda! 767 00:33:33,846 --> 00:33:35,346 Make me a shake! 768 00:33:35,417 --> 00:33:36,417 To go! 769 00:33:36,487 --> 00:33:37,587 AMELDA: Hooray. 770 00:33:37,657 --> 00:33:39,024 Make it two. 771 00:33:41,836 --> 00:33:43,570 (bell ringing) 772 00:33:43,641 --> 00:33:45,075 (cell phone rings) 773 00:33:48,088 --> 00:33:49,155 Hello. 774 00:33:49,224 --> 00:33:51,492 JESSIE: Meet me out in the parking lot. 775 00:33:57,783 --> 00:34:00,385 (piano plays gentle melody) 776 00:34:30,214 --> 00:34:32,482 (laughing) 777 00:34:32,555 --> 00:34:34,022 I hear you're a vegan, Berry. 778 00:34:34,092 --> 00:34:35,326 The souls of those poor egg fetuses 779 00:34:35,396 --> 00:34:36,596 are all on your conscience now. 780 00:34:36,667 --> 00:34:37,433 (laughs) 781 00:34:37,503 --> 00:34:39,537 Do it, Jessie. 782 00:34:41,748 --> 00:34:44,524 Are you with us or not? 783 00:34:53,015 --> 00:34:55,216 Do it. 784 00:34:55,289 --> 00:34:57,190 Break it like you broke my heart. 785 00:34:57,262 --> 00:35:00,323 I loved you. 786 00:35:22,508 --> 00:35:24,676 Now... nightmares of all of the mothers 787 00:35:24,748 --> 00:35:26,950 of the little baby chicks coming after me for revenge. 788 00:35:27,021 --> 00:35:28,322 Oh, this is bull! 789 00:35:28,392 --> 00:35:30,493 Finn, Mike, Matt, come with me. 790 00:35:30,565 --> 00:35:32,066 Right on. It's time for less talking and more punching. 791 00:35:32,136 --> 00:35:34,271 Hey, what's going on? 792 00:35:34,344 --> 00:35:35,978 We're on our way to go all Braveheart on Vocal Adrenaline. 793 00:35:36,048 --> 00:35:37,916 Guys, violence is never the answer. 794 00:35:37,988 --> 00:35:40,356 It is when the question is "What's the best way to mess up 795 00:35:40,428 --> 00:35:41,362 that Jessie kid's face?!" 796 00:35:41,431 --> 00:35:42,898 Mr. Shue, Rachel's one of us. 797 00:35:42,969 --> 00:35:44,837 We're the only ones who get to humiliate her. 798 00:35:44,908 --> 00:35:46,476 Stop! 799 00:35:46,546 --> 00:35:48,781 Get back here and sit down! 800 00:35:51,595 --> 00:35:53,062 Look, I know from experience 801 00:35:53,133 --> 00:35:55,534 that making someone else suffer doesn't make your pain go away. 802 00:35:55,607 --> 00:35:57,141 You're all amazing, no matter 803 00:35:57,211 --> 00:35:59,212 what Vocal Adrenaline says or does. 804 00:35:59,284 --> 00:36:01,052 We just need to find a way to remind ourselves of that. 805 00:36:01,123 --> 00:36:02,891 We can't just let Vocal Adrenaline get away 806 00:36:02,962 --> 00:36:04,229 with turning Rachel into an omelet. 807 00:36:04,299 --> 00:36:05,733 We're not. 808 00:36:05,804 --> 00:36:08,972 Rachel, dial Jessie's number on your phone. 809 00:36:11,421 --> 00:36:14,490 SANTANA: You haven't deleted his number yet? 810 00:36:14,564 --> 00:36:16,164 Jessie St. James? 811 00:36:16,235 --> 00:36:18,436 Will Schuester here. You and Vocal Adrenaline need 812 00:36:18,509 --> 00:36:21,511 to meet at our auditorium Friday, 3:00 sharp. 813 00:36:21,585 --> 00:36:23,853 BRETT PAXTON: Let's hear it from the internationally ranked 814 00:36:23,924 --> 00:36:26,259 Cheerios coach Sue Sylvester. 815 00:36:26,332 --> 00:36:28,600 Coach, six consecutive National titles. 816 00:36:28,672 --> 00:36:31,241 You're the Michael Jordan of cheerleading. 817 00:36:31,313 --> 00:36:32,614 Thanks, Brett, I am. 818 00:36:32,684 --> 00:36:35,419 Sue, let us know about the decision you made 819 00:36:35,493 --> 00:36:37,060 to have Kurt Hummel here 820 00:36:37,131 --> 00:36:39,933 do a 14-and-a-half minute Celine Dion medley, 821 00:36:40,007 --> 00:36:42,275 entirely in French. 822 00:36:42,346 --> 00:36:43,780 Well, I'll tell you what, Brett, 823 00:36:43,851 --> 00:36:45,285 I'm all about finding a freakish, depressed kid 824 00:36:45,355 --> 00:36:46,756 and showing him what winning is all about. 825 00:36:46,826 --> 00:36:48,594 Vive Le difference! 826 00:36:48,666 --> 00:36:50,600 Whoo! (giggles) Well... well, Sue, congratulations, 827 00:36:50,672 --> 00:36:53,707 but I have to ask you, where are you going to put 828 00:36:53,781 --> 00:36:56,382 that mammoth skyscraping trophy? 829 00:36:56,455 --> 00:36:59,157 I know just the place. 830 00:36:59,231 --> 00:37:00,798 (doorbell rings) 831 00:37:13,071 --> 00:37:14,105 Get out. 832 00:37:16,482 --> 00:37:17,682 (whispers): I'm sorry, Mr. Shue. 833 00:37:20,294 --> 00:37:23,062 Wow. You did it, Sue... 834 00:37:23,135 --> 00:37:24,902 I'll do the talking, thank you very much. 835 00:37:24,974 --> 00:37:26,975 Let me break it down for you, William. 836 00:37:27,047 --> 00:37:29,315 You're standing at a crossroads. You have two choices: 837 00:37:29,387 --> 00:37:30,721 Number one: 838 00:37:30,792 --> 00:37:33,060 This trophy will be installed in the choir room 839 00:37:33,131 --> 00:37:34,799 in a custom-built bulletproof case 840 00:37:34,870 --> 00:37:37,005 as a daily reminder of your failure 841 00:37:37,077 --> 00:37:39,845 as a man and an educator. 842 00:37:39,919 --> 00:37:41,052 And what's choice number two? 843 00:37:42,660 --> 00:37:43,893 You can kiss me... 844 00:37:45,335 --> 00:37:47,737 ...right here on the lips... 845 00:37:49,179 --> 00:37:51,047 ...with tongue. 846 00:37:53,024 --> 00:37:54,692 This is payback, isn't it? 847 00:37:59,511 --> 00:38:00,811 No one will know? 848 00:38:02,787 --> 00:38:05,722 Fine. 849 00:38:10,276 --> 00:38:12,444 You know what? 850 00:38:12,516 --> 00:38:14,017 I'm not gonna do this. 851 00:38:15,191 --> 00:38:18,960 Even your breath stinks of mediocrity. 852 00:38:19,036 --> 00:38:20,636 It's making me sick. 853 00:38:25,254 --> 00:38:27,055 ("Loser" by Beck begins playing) 854 00:38:35,819 --> 00:38:37,553 (wheels squeaking) 855 00:38:39,196 --> 00:38:40,963 * Cut it * 856 00:38:41,035 --> 00:38:46,006 * Soy, UN perdedor * 857 00:38:46,083 --> 00:38:49,085 * I'm a loser, baby * 858 00:38:49,159 --> 00:38:51,360 * So why don't you kill me? * 859 00:38:51,432 --> 00:38:52,632 * Double-barrel buckshot * 860 00:38:52,703 --> 00:38:57,140 * Soy, UN perdedor * 861 00:38:57,216 --> 00:39:00,586 * I'm a loser, baby * 862 00:39:00,660 --> 00:39:02,394 * So why don't you kill me? * 863 00:39:02,465 --> 00:39:03,932 * Drive-by body pierce. * 864 00:39:04,003 --> 00:39:06,371 RACHEL: Thanks for coming. 865 00:39:06,444 --> 00:39:08,612 After your brazen escalation of our growing dispute, 866 00:39:08,684 --> 00:39:11,386 which we were willing to put to rest, we decided 867 00:39:11,459 --> 00:39:13,727 the only way to truly funkify you is to show you 868 00:39:13,799 --> 00:39:15,100 the one thing we know you can't do. 869 00:39:15,170 --> 00:39:17,271 So enjoy. 870 00:39:17,343 --> 00:39:18,744 * Roof off * 871 00:39:18,814 --> 00:39:21,116 * We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker * 872 00:39:21,188 --> 00:39:23,223 * Tear the roof off the sucker, tear the roof off * 873 00:39:23,294 --> 00:39:24,728 * We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker * 874 00:39:24,799 --> 00:39:26,466 * Tear the roof off the sucker * 875 00:39:26,537 --> 00:39:28,772 * You've got a real type of thing * 876 00:39:28,844 --> 00:39:30,512 * Going down, gettin' down * 877 00:39:30,582 --> 00:39:34,686 * There's a whole lot of rhythm going round * 878 00:39:34,762 --> 00:39:39,633 * You've got a real type of thing going down, gettin' down * 879 00:39:39,710 --> 00:39:43,813 * There's a whole lot of rhythm going round * 880 00:39:43,889 --> 00:39:46,591 * Ow, we want the funk * 881 00:39:46,664 --> 00:39:48,598 * Give up the funk * 882 00:39:48,670 --> 00:39:50,471 * Ow, we need the funk * 883 00:39:50,542 --> 00:39:52,410 * We gotta have that funk * 884 00:39:52,482 --> 00:39:55,183 * Ow, we want the funk * 885 00:39:55,256 --> 00:39:57,524 * Give up the funk * 886 00:39:57,597 --> 00:39:59,231 * Ow, we need the funk * 887 00:39:59,301 --> 00:40:00,969 * We gotta have that funk * 888 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:03,776 * Na, Na-Na-Na-Na * 889 00:40:03,849 --> 00:40:07,786 * Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo * 890 00:40:07,861 --> 00:40:09,896 * Ow...! * 891 00:40:09,967 --> 00:40:12,769 * Na, Na-Na-Na-Na * 892 00:40:12,842 --> 00:40:15,877 * Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo * 893 00:40:15,952 --> 00:40:19,021 * Ow...! * 894 00:40:19,094 --> 00:40:21,796 * We're gonna turn this mother out * 895 00:40:21,869 --> 00:40:23,102 * Give up the funk * 896 00:40:23,173 --> 00:40:28,177 * We're gonna turn this mother out * 897 00:40:28,255 --> 00:40:30,656 * We're gonna turn this mother out * 898 00:40:30,729 --> 00:40:32,363 * Give up the funk * 899 00:40:32,434 --> 00:40:34,501 * We're gonna turn this mother out * 900 00:40:34,574 --> 00:40:36,809 * We turn this mother out! * 901 00:40:36,881 --> 00:40:38,248 * Na, Na-Na-Na-Na * 902 00:40:38,318 --> 00:40:42,488 * Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo * 903 00:40:42,565 --> 00:40:44,065 * Ow...! * 904 00:40:44,136 --> 00:40:47,238 * You've got a real type of thing going down * 905 00:40:47,312 --> 00:40:49,246 * Gettin' down * 906 00:40:49,318 --> 00:40:51,686 * There's a whole lot of rhythm going down * 907 00:40:51,759 --> 00:40:53,726 * All the rhythm goin' down * 908 00:40:53,798 --> 00:40:58,135 * You've got a real type of thing going down, gettin' down * 909 00:40:58,211 --> 00:41:02,448 * There's a whole lot of rhythm goin' round * 910 00:41:02,524 --> 00:41:03,991 (band plays flourish) 911 00:41:04,062 --> 00:41:04,828 MERCEDES: * Yeah! * 912 00:41:04,898 --> 00:41:06,231 (tempo increases) 913 00:41:06,302 --> 00:41:07,736 * We want the funk * * Yeah * 914 00:41:07,807 --> 00:41:09,774 * Give up the funk * 915 00:41:09,846 --> 00:41:13,248 * We need the funk, gotta have that funk! * * Funky! * 916 00:41:13,323 --> 00:41:14,623 * We want the funk * * Yeah * 917 00:41:14,694 --> 00:41:17,463 * Give up the funk * 918 00:41:17,535 --> 00:41:20,004 * We need the funk, gotta have some funk * 919 00:41:20,076 --> 00:41:21,410 * We want the funk * 920 00:41:21,481 --> 00:41:23,648 * Funky, funky * * Give up the funk * 921 00:41:23,721 --> 00:41:25,822 * We need the funk * * Hey, get down * 922 00:41:25,894 --> 00:41:27,795 * Gotta have that funk * * Hey, yeah! * 923 00:41:27,867 --> 00:41:29,134 * We want the funk * 924 00:41:29,204 --> 00:41:30,471 * Give up the funk * 925 00:41:30,541 --> 00:41:32,509 * We need the funk * 926 00:41:32,580 --> 00:41:34,048 * Gotta have that funk * 927 00:41:39,869 --> 00:41:42,771 See you punks at Regionals. 928 00:41:44,349 --> 00:41:46,384 They did a funk number. 929 00:41:46,456 --> 00:41:49,591 We've never been able to pull off a funk number. 930 00:41:49,665 --> 00:41:52,467 Well, that's because we're soulless automatons. 931 00:41:52,540 --> 00:41:53,975 I'm so depressed.