1 00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:03,700 Here's what you missed last week. Quinn's pregnant. 2 00:00:03,771 --> 00:00:06,171 - You're off the Cheerios. - And everyone thinks that Finn's the father. 3 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,538 Though really, it's Puck. But Quinn thinks he's a Lima loser... 4 00:00:08,609 --> 00:00:11,203 - and doesn't want anything to do with him. - What's up, MILF? 5 00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:14,839 Also, Kurt told everybody he's gay, including his dad, who was actually cool about it. 6 00:00:14,915 --> 00:00:16,712 - Thanks for telling me, Kurt. - And that's what you missed on... 7 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,775 # Glee # 8 00:00:19,787 --> 00:00:21,721 [Whistle Blows] 9 00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:25,754 [Whistle Blows] 10 00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:32,228 [Girl] Five, six, seven! 11 00:00:32,299 --> 00:00:34,324 Five, six, seven! 12 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:39,270 Five, six, seven! One, two, three, four! 13 00:00:39,340 --> 00:00:41,331 Five, six, seven! 14 00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:44,634 Five, six, seven, eight! 15 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,779 You shouldn't do this to yourself. 16 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:51,841 Do what? 17 00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:55,645 I know how much it hurts to be off the team. 18 00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,816 You're just torturing yourself watching. 19 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,588 I need a good distraction. 20 00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:03,926 - From what? - [Sighs] 21 00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:17,233 - $685? - That's how much a sonogram costs. 22 00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:19,245 This is just the beginning. 23 00:01:19,313 --> 00:01:21,713 There's gonna be more doctors' visits... 24 00:01:21,782 --> 00:01:24,683 vitamins, new clothes for when I explode. 25 00:01:24,752 --> 00:01:26,913 [Sighs] What are we gonna do? 26 00:01:26,987 --> 00:01:28,750 What are you gonna do? 27 00:01:28,822 --> 00:01:32,223 Well, I'm looking for a job. I mean, no one's hiring. 28 00:01:32,292 --> 00:01:35,955 I almost got in at Olive Garden, but they said I was too tall to be a busboy. 29 00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:39,931 Somewhere in that pea brain of yours... 30 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,934 is a man. 31 00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:46,666 Access him and tell him to prove to me that I chose the right guy to have a baby with. 32 00:01:46,740 --> 00:01:48,674 I will. 33 00:01:48,742 --> 00:01:52,803 I'll-I'll find a job. You can count on me, I swear. 34 00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,815 - Where-Where are you goin' ? - You were right. 35 00:01:55,883 --> 00:01:58,875 - [Whistle Continues Blowing] - This does hurt too much. 36 00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:05,625 My blog has lit up with comments suggesting... 37 00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:08,627 you don't have a shot at nationals since you lost Quinn Fabray. 38 00:02:08,695 --> 00:02:11,129 No, the Cheerios are stronger than ever. 39 00:02:11,198 --> 00:02:13,860 We're gonna take nationals with this routine. 40 00:02:18,705 --> 00:02:22,664 Mediocre! Hit the showers! 41 00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:25,837 - [Chattering] - [School Bell Rings] 42 00:02:25,913 --> 00:02:29,144 I have several sources reporting Quinn didn't wanna leave... 43 00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:31,878 but you kicked her out because of the pregnancy scandal. 44 00:02:31,952 --> 00:02:34,182 Well, Jacob, this is Ohio, and in order to win... 45 00:02:34,254 --> 00:02:37,018 my Cheerios need to appeal to that panel of judges. 46 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:40,025 So if I have a pregnant girl doing a handspring into a double layout... 47 00:02:40,093 --> 00:02:43,119 the judges aren't going to be admiring her impeccable form. 48 00:02:43,197 --> 00:02:45,927 They're going to be wondering if the centrifugal force... 49 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:48,092 is going to make the baby's head start crowning. 50 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:50,932 Oh, and by the way, all this... off the record. 51 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,938 Probably should've told you that earlier. 52 00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,997 - This isn't fair. - Is it fair that... 53 00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:58,533 I have to stop providing the baseball team with protective cups? 54 00:02:58,612 --> 00:03:01,843 I only get a certain amount of dollars a year to spend, William. 55 00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,509 - Yeah, but Artie... - He's used to overcoming challenges. 56 00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:07,418 He'll just have to find his own ride to sectionals. 57 00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:11,584 That "handicapable" bus costs $600 a week to rent. 58 00:03:11,658 --> 00:03:13,956 - We can't afford it. - But there's enough money in the budget... 59 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,928 to fly the Cheerios all over the country for their competitions? 60 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:21,058 Sue Sylvester has boosters that write fat checks. 61 00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:24,069 None of her travel expenses come out of the school budget. 62 00:03:24,137 --> 00:03:26,833 Look. When I was in the Glee Club... 63 00:03:26,907 --> 00:03:30,206 the best part of the competitions was the bus ride to the event. 64 00:03:30,277 --> 00:03:32,609 It was about camaraderie and supporting each other. 65 00:03:32,679 --> 00:03:34,442 You think I feel good about this? 66 00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:37,609 Well, my students won't stand for it. 67 00:03:37,684 --> 00:03:40,619 That's very moving, but my hands are tied, Schue. 68 00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:45,056 If you want that bus, you're gonna have to find a way to pay for it yourself. 69 00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,585 [Sighs] 70 00:03:52,132 --> 00:03:54,623 [School Bell Rings] 71 00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:59,804 - What about Target? - Tried. Not hiring. 72 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:03,240 Another doctor bill came to my parents' house last night, Finn. 73 00:04:03,310 --> 00:04:06,245 We're lucky that I'm clever and intercepted it. 74 00:04:06,313 --> 00:04:08,440 But we have to start paying these doctors' bills... 75 00:04:08,515 --> 00:04:10,915 or they're gonna go to a collection agency. 76 00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:14,750 And then my parents are gonna find out that I'm with child... your child. 77 00:04:14,821 --> 00:04:18,018 All right, guys. We're doin' a new number for sectionals. 78 00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:21,492 I know that pop songs have sort of been our signature pieces. 79 00:04:21,562 --> 00:04:23,826 But I did a little research on past winners... 80 00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:26,798 and it turns out that the judges like songs that are more accessible. 81 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:30,598 Stuff they know. Uh, standards, Broadway. 82 00:04:30,671 --> 00:04:33,367 "Defying Gravity"? I have an iPod shuffle... 83 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:36,034 dedicated exclusively to selections from Wicked. 84 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,873 - This is amazing. - Think you can handle it, Rachel? 85 00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:42,848 It's my go-to shower song. It's also my ringtone. 86 00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,714 [Mercedes] Why do we have to go all vanilla on this song? 87 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,653 See, what we need is my chocolate thunder. 88 00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:52,681 We don't have time to rearrange the song for you, Mercedes. Rachel is singing it. 89 00:04:52,759 --> 00:04:55,887 Don't worry. We'll find something for you to dip in chocolate. 90 00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:58,727 - [Laughter] - On to item two. 91 00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,699 The school won't pay for the special bus we need... 92 00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:02,826 to take Artie and his wheelchair with us to sectionals. 93 00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:05,303 - Wh-Wh-What? - That's completely unfair. 94 00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:09,399 So, we're gonna have to raise money to pay for it ourselves. 95 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:14,311 See, when I was in Glee Club and we needed new silk cummerbunds for regionals... 96 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:16,315 we held a bake sale. 97 00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:18,078 [Laughter] 98 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:23,020 Wait. You're joking, right? I mean, bake sales are kind of "bougie." 99 00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:26,150 So hip people stopped eating delicious sugary treats? 100 00:05:26,226 --> 00:05:29,889 It's not that. It's most of us don't know how to bake. 101 00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,431 I find recipes confusing. 102 00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:34,660 My family's fully committed to takeout. 103 00:05:34,735 --> 00:05:37,704 Yeah, Mr. Schue. Kids are busier than when you went here. 104 00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:42,208 We've got homework and football and teen pregnancy, lunch. 105 00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:44,175 Can't Artie's dad just take him? 106 00:05:44,244 --> 00:05:47,543 I can't believe how insensitive you're all being. 107 00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:49,878 - Are you a team? - Of course. 108 00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:52,612 But Artie understands. Don't you, Artie? 109 00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:55,348 Of-Of course. It-It's cool. 110 00:05:55,422 --> 00:05:59,518 I mean, anything that takes away our time from rehearsing doesn't serve as a team. 111 00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:03,425 [School Bell Rings] 112 00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,730 - Let me help you out, buddy. - Thank you. 113 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:15,434 Hey, I'm really sorry about how they all reacted, Artie. 114 00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:19,775 It's okay. I'm used to it. They just... don't get it. [Chuckles] 115 00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:24,716 Can I use the auditorium this afternoon to rehearse, Mr. Schue? 116 00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:27,652 - Some of the band equipment's in there. - Sure. 117 00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:49,170 # On the floor of Tokyo-o # 118 00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:51,904 # Or down in London town to go-o # 119 00:06:51,978 --> 00:06:55,106 # With the record selection with the mirror reflection # 120 00:06:55,182 --> 00:06:57,912 # I'm dancing with myself # 121 00:06:57,984 --> 00:07:00,418 # When there's no one else in sight # 122 00:07:00,487 --> 00:07:03,456 # In the crowded lonely night # 123 00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:06,924 # Well, I wait so long for my love vibration # 124 00:07:06,993 --> 00:07:09,484 # And I'm dancing with myself # 125 00:07:09,563 --> 00:07:12,862 # I'm dancing with myself # 126 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,697 # I'm dancing with myself # 127 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:18,795 # Well, there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove # 128 00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:22,171 # And I'll be dancing with myself # 129 00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:24,267 # If I looked all over the world # 130 00:07:24,344 --> 00:07:27,871 # And there's every type of girl # 131 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,849 # But your empty eyes seem to pass me by # 132 00:07:30,917 --> 00:07:33,886 # And leave me dancing with myself # 133 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:36,787 # So let's sink another drink # 134 00:07:36,857 --> 00:07:39,849 # 'Cause it'll give me time to think # 135 00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:42,827 # If I had the chance I'd ask the world to dance # 136 00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:46,297 # And I'll be dancing with myself # 137 00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:48,857 # Oh, dancing with myself # 138 00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:52,234 # Oh, dancing with myself # 139 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,967 # Oh, there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove # 140 00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:58,033 # I'll be dancing with myself # 141 00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:01,046 # Oh, dancing with myself # 142 00:08:01,114 --> 00:08:03,810 # Oh, dancing with myself # 143 00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:07,183 # Oh, there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove # 144 00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:09,552 # And I'll be dancing with myself ## 145 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,693 - [School Bell Rings] - I have something I'd like to say. 146 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:21,225 I wanna audition for the Wicked solo. 147 00:08:21,301 --> 00:08:23,861 - [Murmuring] - Kurt, there's a high "F" in it. 148 00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:26,337 - That's well within my range. - [Tittering] 149 00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:30,365 Well, I think Rachel's gonna be fine for the female lead. 150 00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:32,377 But I'm happy to have you try out something else, Kurt. 151 00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,743 - And we'll make sure that it's got a killer high note. - [Murmuring] 152 00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:37,181 - You tried. - Anyway... 153 00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:39,377 I wanted to say something to you guys. 154 00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:43,286 I was a little disappointed at how you were all so willing... 155 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,290 to take the bus together to sectionals... 156 00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:48,623 and make Artie drive by himself with his dad. 157 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:52,563 We're a team, guys. We're in this Glee Club together. 158 00:08:52,632 --> 00:08:55,396 Artie doesn't care. His dad drives him everywhere. 159 00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:59,097 I do care. That kind of hurt my feelings. 160 00:08:59,172 --> 00:09:00,764 We didn't think you would take it personally. 161 00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:06,211 Well, you're irritating most of the time, but don't take that personally. 162 00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:08,304 I don't know if you guys really understand how much harder... 163 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,645 - Artie has to work just to keep up. - Preach. 164 00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:13,550 We're riding to sectionals together... 165 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,554 or we're not going at all. 166 00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:18,887 And to pay for the bus, we're having a bake sale. 167 00:09:18,959 --> 00:09:23,896 - [Boy] Bake sale. - St. Ignatius nursing home was having a tag sale. 168 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:27,422 And my A.V. Club friends here agreed to help out. 169 00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:32,972 For the next week, each of you is going to spend... 170 00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:35,906 three hours a day in a wheelchair. 171 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:41,312 Oh, oh, oh. And we're doing a wheelchair number. 172 00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:43,576 [Artie Clapping Softly] 173 00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:48,450 ## [Rock] 174 00:09:48,521 --> 00:09:51,081 - # On the floors of Tokyo # - Oh! 175 00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:54,251 # Or down in London town to go, go # 176 00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:56,454 # With the record selection and the mirror's reflection # 177 00:09:56,529 --> 00:09:58,997 # I'm dancing with myself # 178 00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:02,000 # When there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove # 179 00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:04,229 # I'll be dancing with myself # 180 00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:07,330 # Oh, oh, oh, oh ## 181 00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,736 - [Laughing] - [Whimpering Softly] 182 00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:16,339 [Puck] I didn't even know we had a home ec room. 183 00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:18,850 [Scoffs] What's all this? 184 00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:23,356 Ingredients for cupcakes... for the stupid bake sale. 185 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:32,457 - What's this? - It's what I had left over from my pool cleaning money... 186 00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:35,330 after I bought dip and nunchakus. 187 00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:38,496 I was getting that you kind of need money... for our kid. 188 00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:40,163 For my kid. 189 00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:44,241 Eighteen dollars. 190 00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:46,643 How much has Finn given you? 191 00:10:47,948 --> 00:10:50,178 Just stop. 192 00:10:51,418 --> 00:10:53,386 I told you before. 193 00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:56,047 I don't care if that baby comes out with a Mohawk. 194 00:10:56,122 --> 00:10:59,091 I will go to my grave swearing it's Finn's. 195 00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:08,667 It would be pretty awesome if it came out with a Mohawk. 196 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:13,105 [Chuckles] You are such an egghead. 197 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,334 I'm not. 198 00:11:25,919 --> 00:11:27,580 [Laughing] 199 00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:36,294 - [Grunts Loudly] - [Squeals] That was perfectly measured! 200 00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:39,855 - There you go. Oh! - [Laughing] 201 00:11:39,933 --> 00:11:42,094 Come on. Oh! 202 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,699 What the hell? 203 00:11:51,978 --> 00:11:55,778 [Chuckles] We're baking. 204 00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:57,908 I can see that. 205 00:11:57,984 --> 00:12:00,418 I'm gonna go change. 206 00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:08,423 Where's my jelly cream center? 207 00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:11,123 Sorry, Dad. I must've forgotten. 208 00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,131 What's up with your brain today? 209 00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:16,225 You know, I think it's goin' soft from all that crap you put in your hair. 210 00:12:16,302 --> 00:12:18,964 It's organic, and I'm fine. 211 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:24,241 I'm sorry. It's a Glee Club thing. 212 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:28,644 It's not about a guy, is it? Because I'm not ready to have that conversation. 213 00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:31,309 Well, at least you don't have to worry about me getting someone pregnant. 214 00:12:31,384 --> 00:12:34,080 [Chuckling] 215 00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:39,023 It's not a guy. We're doing this amazing song for sectionals... 216 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:42,994 a personal favorite of mine, and Mr. Schuester won't give me a chance to sing it. 217 00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:46,863 - Why? - It's traditionally sung by a girl. 218 00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:49,925 Well, you sing like a girl. You know, in a good way. 219 00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:51,698 Look, Kurt. 220 00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:53,739 I don't know how this music stuff works. 221 00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:57,106 I'm pretty exclusively committed to my Mellencamp collection, but... 222 00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:59,236 isn't there more crossover nowadays? 223 00:12:59,312 --> 00:13:01,246 You know, chicks doin' construction? 224 00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:04,545 Guys wearin' dress shoes with no socks? 225 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:08,018 Didn't that girl from your high school just join the boys' wrestling team? 226 00:13:08,088 --> 00:13:10,556 - [Whistle Blowing] - Yes! Whoo! 227 00:13:11,891 --> 00:13:14,121 Yes, but her parents had to sue the school. 228 00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:19,898 This is really gettin' you down, isn't it? 229 00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:22,230 I'm... full of ennui. 230 00:13:23,336 --> 00:13:26,203 So it's... really getting you down? 231 00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:30,342 Yes. 232 00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:33,072 You can't discriminate against my kid because of his sex... 233 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,478 religion, political affiliation... 234 00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,573 or the fact that he's queer as a three-dollar bill. 235 00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:41,347 - And I won't accept it. - This isn't academics or athletics, Mr. Hummel. 236 00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:46,017 It's an arts program, and Mr. Schuester's judgments are subjective. 237 00:13:46,092 --> 00:13:48,219 You put on a blindfold and listen to my kid sing... 238 00:13:48,294 --> 00:13:50,319 and you will swear you're hearing Ronnie Spector. 239 00:13:50,396 --> 00:13:52,887 - Wait... - Don't try to backpedal on this, Schuester. 240 00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:55,196 I was just going to agree with you. 241 00:13:55,268 --> 00:13:57,759 I know this is gonna be hard on you, Rachel... 242 00:13:57,837 --> 00:14:01,034 but I can't in good conscience preach about the importance of helping Artie... 243 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:03,007 and then reject Kurt's request out of hand. 244 00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:04,873 So you're giving him my part? 245 00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:07,435 Now, I can't just give him the part. That would be just as wrong. 246 00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:09,448 But I can let him audition. 247 00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:13,612 What do you mean, like a tryout? All right, that seems fair. 248 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:16,519 This is totally unfair. You gave me the part. 249 00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:21,083 And I will give it to you again if you can sing the song better than Kurt. 250 00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,561 Okay, this seems like a reasonable deal. 251 00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:26,224 But how do I know this isn't just some show... 252 00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:28,961 to stop me from takin' a flamethrower to this place? 253 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,034 Who's gonna judge? 254 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,073 Now, all of you are gonna judge. 255 00:14:34,140 --> 00:14:38,975 And in the spirit of full access, each of you is going to get a vote. 256 00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:41,411 Whatever singer has the most votes gets the part. 257 00:14:41,481 --> 00:14:45,713 This isn't gonna be about talent, Mr. Schuester. It's gonna be a popularity contest. 258 00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:48,879 Stop right there. Mr. Schue, if I may? 259 00:14:54,027 --> 00:14:56,427 We all know I'm more popular than Rachel. 260 00:14:56,496 --> 00:14:58,464 And I dress better than her. 261 00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:02,433 But I want you all to promise me that you're going to vote for whoever sings the song better. 262 00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:05,130 Raise your right hand. 263 00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:07,332 Your right hand, Brittany. 264 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:09,739 - It's this one. - Sorry. 265 00:15:09,809 --> 00:15:13,245 Repeat after me. I promise to vote for whoever sings the song better. 266 00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:17,647 I promise to vote for whoever sings the song better. 267 00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:19,912 Good luck. 268 00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,619 - It's on. - [School Bell Rings] 269 00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:29,151 All right, guys. 270 00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:34,760 Maybe one of these days, you'll find a way... 271 00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:38,133 to create teaching moments without ruining my life. 272 00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:52,477 Schue, I saw all your kids in their wheelchairs, and I was very impressed. 273 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:55,077 Well, thank you, Principal Figgins. But actually... 274 00:15:55,154 --> 00:15:58,317 it's made me realize that there's only one wheelchair entrance in this school... 275 00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,723 and it's all the way in the far end of campus. 276 00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:02,658 McKinley needs ramps. 277 00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:05,960 No way. Those are what I call "lazy makers." 278 00:16:06,032 --> 00:16:07,966 They discourage our able-bodied students... 279 00:16:08,034 --> 00:16:10,298 from getting their proper exercise by using the stairs. 280 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:12,668 - What is she doing here? - Yes. What am I doing here? 281 00:16:12,739 --> 00:16:15,299 I have a Cheerios routine to polish that's gonna clinch us nationals. 282 00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:18,640 I brought you two in here because both of you have a point. 283 00:16:18,711 --> 00:16:23,239 Handicapped ramps are expensive, but inspiration is free. 284 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:26,012 Will, I'm so inspired by your stunt... 285 00:16:26,085 --> 00:16:28,849 that I'm insisting that Miss Sylvester do the same with the Cheerios. 286 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:32,516 - I beg your pardon? - Cheerios is not accessible, Sue. 287 00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:34,526 It's by invitation only. 288 00:16:34,594 --> 00:16:39,122 I want to see a squad that reflects our community's diversity. 289 00:16:39,198 --> 00:16:42,690 - Now, Glee Club held open auditions. - And everyone got in. 290 00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:45,533 Now that Quinn Fabray is off the squad... 291 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:48,039 you will hold open auditions to fill her slot. 292 00:16:48,107 --> 00:16:52,407 And Mr. Schuester will monitor them to make sure that they're fair to all. 293 00:16:52,478 --> 00:16:54,275 Okay, let me break this down for you here. 294 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:58,283 There comes a point when you've gotta stop seeing people for what they look like... 295 00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,581 and ask them to show you what they can do. 296 00:17:00,653 --> 00:17:05,886 And as soon as a cheerleader rolls herself out onto the field in a wheelchair... 297 00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:09,985 she becomes decidedly less effective at cheering people up. 298 00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,031 - It's just a fact. - No, Sue. 299 00:17:12,098 --> 00:17:16,364 The fact is, you've never given other students the fair shake that they deserve. 300 00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:20,170 I'm asking you to try it. What do you have to lose? 301 00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:22,707 Maybe somebody at the school will surprise you. 302 00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:29,310 Cupcake? [Sniffs] 303 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,475 Cupcakes suck. That's why we're not selling any. 304 00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:33,781 It's not about the cupcakes. It's about us. 305 00:17:33,853 --> 00:17:36,048 Nobody wants to buy from losers. 306 00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:38,920 We're in Glee Club and in wheelchairs. 307 00:17:38,991 --> 00:17:40,925 She has a point. Six months ago... 308 00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:43,120 I could've sold 50 of these things on fear alone. 309 00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:47,132 Oh, my God. What is she doing? 310 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:49,725 I actually think they're kind of friends. 311 00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:52,100 Brittany's always cheating off her test papers in math class. 312 00:17:52,171 --> 00:17:56,164 See so many? And look how pretty they are, Becky. 313 00:17:56,242 --> 00:17:57,607 Wow! 314 00:17:57,677 --> 00:17:59,736 Brittany, you're supposed to be in your wheelchair. 315 00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:01,302 I lost it. 316 00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:04,646 Are you a cheerleader? It's so cool. 317 00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:07,015 So is buying a cupcake. That's really cool. 318 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:10,681 - But I don't have any money. - That's okay. I have some. 319 00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:16,621 Thank you. 320 00:18:18,765 --> 00:18:20,756 Thanks. 321 00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:24,202 So how much do we have now? 322 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:27,603 Well, with this one dollar, we have one dollar. 323 00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:29,800 This is ridiculous. 324 00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:34,040 - Maybe if we put a jellybean on top, we'd sell more. - Are you an idiot? 325 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,877 How am I supposed to trust you to take care of our baby... 326 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:39,440 when you can't even figure out how to sell a damn cupcake? 327 00:18:39,519 --> 00:18:42,181 - Stop attacking me. I'm sick of it. - Get a job. 328 00:18:42,255 --> 00:18:46,521 I'm trying! Stupid wheelchair! 329 00:18:46,592 --> 00:18:49,459 [Sighs] 330 00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:56,292 I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing here. 331 00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:58,860 You just call a name. They come in and try out. 332 00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,872 Just give 'em a chance to express themselves. 333 00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:04,000 I'm about to projectile express myself all over your Hush Puppies. 334 00:19:04,076 --> 00:19:07,773 McKinley! Hey, hey! McKinley! 335 00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:09,815 - Hey, hey... - No. 336 00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,417 No. 337 00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:20,391 You're not serious, are you? 338 00:19:21,627 --> 00:19:24,721 Tell me you're not serious. 339 00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:26,321 No! 340 00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:28,196 No friggin' way, Jacob. 341 00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,042 Freak! 342 00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:43,281 Okay, I've been at this for an hour. That's all I promised. 343 00:19:43,349 --> 00:19:47,012 Sue, there's just one more person on the list. Give her a shot. 344 00:19:47,086 --> 00:19:49,077 - Becky Johnson. - Jackson. 345 00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:52,022 Jackson. 346 00:19:53,392 --> 00:19:55,587 Be nice, Sue. 347 00:19:55,661 --> 00:19:58,630 I heard that you do a routine with jump ropes. 348 00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,757 I wanted to show you what I could do. 349 00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:14,737 Becky, I'm gonna stop you right there. 350 00:20:16,449 --> 00:20:21,716 You're in. Be at practice tomorrow at 4:00 p.m. Congratulations. 351 00:20:26,626 --> 00:20:29,857 - What are you up to, Sue? - I'm just following orders, Will. 352 00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:34,025 I'm doing what I was told. And I found myself a brand-new Cheerio. 353 00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:36,466 You're up to something. 354 00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:39,437 I don't like this, Sue. 355 00:20:40,506 --> 00:20:42,303 - [Sighs] - [School Bell Rings] 356 00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:46,911 I'm just saying, she has a point. You are kind of an idiot. 357 00:20:46,979 --> 00:20:49,311 Nice support, dude. Whatever happened to "bros before ho's"? 358 00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:52,681 You've got a baby on the way, bro, and you haven't done spit to take care of it. 359 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:55,220 - Like you'd do any different? - Damn straight. 360 00:20:55,288 --> 00:20:57,381 How? Nobody's hiring. 361 00:20:57,456 --> 00:20:59,481 Sell your Xbox. Rob a bank. 362 00:20:59,559 --> 00:21:03,154 Go all Robin Hood on this joint. Whatever it takes. 363 00:21:03,229 --> 00:21:08,292 All I ever hear is you whining and crying about how hard this is on you. What about her? 364 00:21:08,367 --> 00:21:11,359 Dude, you are so out of line. You don't know what I'm dealing with. 365 00:21:11,437 --> 00:21:15,032 All I know is that you're a punk who doesn't deserve to have Quinn as his girlfriend! 366 00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,631 You're a punk! 367 00:21:21,347 --> 00:21:23,975 - [Finn Groans Loudly] - [Gasping, Chattering] 368 00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:30,153 Hey, hey! Break it up! Break it up! 369 00:21:30,222 --> 00:21:32,816 - Come on! Hey... - He started it! 370 00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:36,055 - I don't care! Now. - [Pants] 371 00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:41,327 You-You guys are best friends. What the hell's goin' on? 372 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:44,301 I'm just really stressed about the bake sale. 373 00:21:44,370 --> 00:21:46,600 I really like Artie, okay? 374 00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:51,032 You okay? 375 00:21:57,550 --> 00:22:01,247 The key to a double turn is to just go for it. 376 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,652 You push with the right wheel, and pull as hard as you can with the left... 377 00:22:03,723 --> 00:22:07,090 and find a spot on the wall to spot you so you don't get dizzy. 378 00:22:07,159 --> 00:22:09,684 Whoo! 379 00:22:13,599 --> 00:22:15,897 [Will] Okay, guys. Uh, take five, all right? 380 00:22:15,968 --> 00:22:19,028 Oh! Remember to show up early on Thursday. 381 00:22:19,105 --> 00:22:21,596 It's Rachel versus Kurt for the big solo. 382 00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:24,074 [Students Gasping, Chuckling] 383 00:22:25,411 --> 00:22:29,040 Careful. Respect the chair. 384 00:22:33,486 --> 00:22:36,114 I really admire you, Artie. 385 00:22:36,188 --> 00:22:38,588 I had no idea how difficult this was. 386 00:22:38,658 --> 00:22:40,250 It's just like you with your stutter. 387 00:22:40,326 --> 00:22:43,022 You don't really notice it after a while. 388 00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:47,258 H-H-How did it happen? 389 00:22:47,333 --> 00:22:49,267 You don't talk about it. 390 00:22:49,335 --> 00:22:53,066 My mom and I got in a really bad car accident when I was eight. 391 00:22:53,139 --> 00:22:56,700 And she was fine, but I've been in the chair ever since. 392 00:22:56,776 --> 00:23:00,212 But I wanna be very clear. 393 00:23:00,279 --> 00:23:02,372 I still have the use of my penis. 394 00:23:05,785 --> 00:23:07,548 [Softly] Oh, God. 395 00:23:23,803 --> 00:23:26,328 ## [Singing Notes] 396 00:23:26,405 --> 00:23:28,396 ## [Continues: Raising Pitch] 397 00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:33,077 - ## [Continues] - [Phone Ringing] 398 00:23:33,145 --> 00:23:35,477 Excuse me a second. 399 00:23:35,548 --> 00:23:37,539 ## [Continues] 400 00:23:39,318 --> 00:23:41,309 [Ringing Continues] 401 00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:46,956 ## [Continues: Raising Pitch] 402 00:23:47,026 --> 00:23:50,154 Hummel Tires and Lube. Yep. Who's this? 403 00:23:52,765 --> 00:23:54,699 [Man] Your son's a fag. 404 00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:56,758 [Line Clicks, Dial Tone] 405 00:23:58,537 --> 00:24:00,528 [Beeps] 406 00:24:02,241 --> 00:24:05,802 - Hey, Dad. - What the hell is wrong with this machine? 407 00:24:05,878 --> 00:24:07,937 I hit it... the high "F." 408 00:24:08,013 --> 00:24:10,004 The magical note I need for "Defying Gravity." 409 00:24:10,082 --> 00:24:12,277 - I hit it. It means I'm gonna win. - That's great. 410 00:24:12,351 --> 00:24:15,149 Good for you. Just how long until the damn coffee's ready? 411 00:24:15,221 --> 00:24:17,689 What's going on? 412 00:24:17,757 --> 00:24:20,885 I got a phone call this morning. The anonymous kind. 413 00:24:22,228 --> 00:24:24,822 It was some dude telling me my son was a fag. 414 00:24:24,897 --> 00:24:29,391 Oh. Well, that's not a big deal. I get that all the time. 415 00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:31,333 Yeah, but I don't. 416 00:24:31,403 --> 00:24:33,837 Now, look, Kurt. 417 00:24:33,906 --> 00:24:36,340 I try to do right by you. You know, open some doors. 418 00:24:36,408 --> 00:24:39,070 What father wouldn't do that for his kid? And I know it's good for you... 419 00:24:39,145 --> 00:24:42,171 to be out there with... with all this Glee Club stuff. 420 00:24:42,248 --> 00:24:46,150 I just... I don't want you to get hurt. 421 00:24:47,419 --> 00:24:50,149 So you don't want me to audition for the solo? 422 00:24:50,222 --> 00:24:52,156 No, no. Let me be clear, all right? 423 00:24:52,224 --> 00:24:55,751 No one pushes the Hummels around, especially cowards on the phone. 424 00:25:00,232 --> 00:25:03,326 Sometimes, I just... I wish your mom was still around, you know? 425 00:25:03,402 --> 00:25:05,870 She was better at... 426 00:25:05,938 --> 00:25:08,338 you know, handlin' this kind of thing. 427 00:25:08,407 --> 00:25:10,341 You know, handlin' me. 428 00:25:13,179 --> 00:25:15,113 Look, congrats on, uh... 429 00:25:15,181 --> 00:25:17,672 you know, the cool "A" or the high "C" or, you know, whatever it was. 430 00:25:17,750 --> 00:25:20,218 - High "F." - Yeah. 431 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:31,056 There's your problem. You just had a bent push rim. 432 00:25:32,965 --> 00:25:35,957 - Good as new. - Thanks, Finn. 433 00:25:36,035 --> 00:25:38,765 You're the only one who was willing to help me. 434 00:25:38,838 --> 00:25:42,274 - I'm really nervous about the "diva off" tomorrow. - Don't be. 435 00:25:42,341 --> 00:25:44,935 You know, I don't wanna win out of charity. 436 00:25:45,010 --> 00:25:47,240 I wanna win the solo because it's right for the club. 437 00:25:47,313 --> 00:25:49,247 I really think that the judges at sectionals... 438 00:25:49,315 --> 00:25:53,581 will find a female version of"Defying Gravity" much more accessible. 439 00:25:53,652 --> 00:25:57,748 But... I don't think that's gonna happen. 440 00:25:57,823 --> 00:25:59,757 People just don't like me. 441 00:25:59,825 --> 00:26:02,623 Yeah, you might wanna work on that. 442 00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:06,791 I like you. 443 00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:11,333 - We need to talk. - I'll get out of your way. 444 00:26:11,403 --> 00:26:14,167 Nope! You stay. I need a witness. Do you know what this is? 445 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:17,073 Oh. It's just a "past due" notice. My mom gets 'em all the time. 446 00:26:17,142 --> 00:26:19,770 Right. But if this sonogram bill doesn't get paid... 447 00:26:19,845 --> 00:26:21,779 it's not your phone that's gonna get cut off. 448 00:26:21,847 --> 00:26:23,781 You will get cut off. 449 00:26:23,849 --> 00:26:25,612 You need to help me with this, Finn... 450 00:26:25,684 --> 00:26:28,414 or else we're gonna go our separate ways. 451 00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:34,081 [Sighs] I'm screwed. 452 00:26:35,694 --> 00:26:37,685 Not necessarily. 453 00:26:44,036 --> 00:26:45,936 [Chattering] 454 00:26:47,039 --> 00:26:48,973 I know. I know. I know, I know. 455 00:26:49,041 --> 00:26:52,135 - Hey. Hey, guys. Hey, guys, this is amazing. - [Girl] Hi. 456 00:26:52,211 --> 00:26:56,147 Puck found his Nana Connie's old recipe. They're addictive. Do you want one? 457 00:26:56,215 --> 00:26:59,446 No. No, thanks. I don't wanna take one away from a paying customer. 458 00:26:59,518 --> 00:27:01,281 - Yeah, I know. Sure. - Hey, uh... 459 00:27:01,353 --> 00:27:03,787 Nice work, buddy. 460 00:27:03,856 --> 00:27:05,847 These are so good. 461 00:27:05,925 --> 00:27:08,189 [Puck Narrating] This isn't Nana Connie's old recipe. 462 00:27:08,260 --> 00:27:10,524 She couldn't cook at all. She was a diabetic. 463 00:27:10,596 --> 00:27:13,463 So the only sweets she had in her house was dried fruit. 464 00:27:14,833 --> 00:27:18,098 I knew I had to do something to help Quinn out with our baby. 465 00:27:18,170 --> 00:27:21,628 I don't know what kind of stuff you need for a baby that's still in your stomach. 466 00:27:21,707 --> 00:27:24,198 Bottles, diapers... That kind of thing, I guess. 467 00:27:24,276 --> 00:27:27,973 But my baby mama was gonna get it all. 468 00:27:28,047 --> 00:27:32,347 To make sure that happened, I used the two things I know the most about... 469 00:27:32,418 --> 00:27:34,215 lying and crime. 470 00:27:34,286 --> 00:27:36,481 Is there a lot of pain, Noah? 471 00:27:36,555 --> 00:27:39,524 [Mock Sobbing] The doctor said the shark fractured my spinal cord. 472 00:27:39,591 --> 00:27:41,889 This is why I don't go to the aquarium. 473 00:27:41,961 --> 00:27:46,898 I'm going to give you as much as you want, 20 cents on the dollar. 474 00:27:46,966 --> 00:27:49,560 [Puck Narrating] I don't put in enough to get you hallucinatin' . 475 00:27:49,635 --> 00:27:52,126 Just enough to give you a wicked case of the munchies. 476 00:27:52,204 --> 00:27:55,196 - That's why they keep coming back for more. - Yeah. 477 00:27:55,274 --> 00:27:57,936 See? I told you I'd make a great dad. 478 00:27:59,078 --> 00:28:02,411 Faster. Harder! 479 00:28:04,016 --> 00:28:07,110 Those better be tears of joy, Becky. 480 00:28:07,186 --> 00:28:09,677 Faster! Harder! 481 00:28:09,755 --> 00:28:12,223 Okay, stop. [Sighs] 482 00:28:12,291 --> 00:28:14,691 Becky, this is terrible. 483 00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:17,388 I've tried, Coach. This is really hard. 484 00:28:17,463 --> 00:28:20,125 You think this is hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch... 485 00:28:20,199 --> 00:28:22,133 and being told that they're going in another direction. 486 00:28:22,201 --> 00:28:24,635 That was hard. Hit the showers. 487 00:28:24,703 --> 00:28:27,695 Thanks, Coach. [Giggles] 488 00:28:34,980 --> 00:28:36,971 Hi. 489 00:28:40,352 --> 00:28:42,286 Sue, you are unbelievable. 490 00:28:42,354 --> 00:28:44,345 And you are a terrible spy. 491 00:28:44,423 --> 00:28:47,950 You might try breathing through your nose sometime. If you were a sniper... 492 00:28:48,027 --> 00:28:51,087 I'd have already radioed in your coordinates, just like in the Falklands. 493 00:28:51,163 --> 00:28:54,098 - I'm not gonna let you bully that girl, Sue. - Oh, I bully everybody, Will. 494 00:28:54,166 --> 00:28:56,225 - It's the way I roll. - Yeah, but this is different. 495 00:28:56,301 --> 00:28:58,235 She's not like everybody else. 496 00:28:58,303 --> 00:29:00,533 I want you to listen to what you just said, William. 497 00:29:00,606 --> 00:29:03,268 You're asking me to treat this girl differently because she has a disability... 498 00:29:03,342 --> 00:29:06,436 when actually, it seems to me she just wants to be treated like everybody else. 499 00:29:06,512 --> 00:29:10,414 - Why are you doing this? - Because I know you, and you're up to something. 500 00:29:10,482 --> 00:29:14,009 You don't know the first thing about me. 501 00:29:18,891 --> 00:29:21,519 [Door Closes] 502 00:29:25,164 --> 00:29:28,861 Good luck. I'm rooting for you. 503 00:29:32,171 --> 00:29:38,007 All right. Welcome to the Glee Club's first official "diva off." 504 00:29:38,077 --> 00:29:41,672 - [Applause] - Let's get this party started! 505 00:29:46,418 --> 00:29:48,147 ## [Piano] 506 00:29:53,225 --> 00:29:56,353 # Something has changed within me # 507 00:29:56,428 --> 00:29:58,988 # Something is not the same # 508 00:29:59,064 --> 00:30:02,864 # I'm through with playing by the rules # 509 00:30:02,935 --> 00:30:05,563 # Of someone else's game # 510 00:30:05,637 --> 00:30:08,936 # Too late for second-guessing # 511 00:30:09,007 --> 00:30:11,669 # Too late to go back to sleep # 512 00:30:11,743 --> 00:30:15,201 # It's time to trust my instincts # 513 00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:18,681 # Close my eyes and leap # 514 00:30:18,750 --> 00:30:20,980 # It's time to try # 515 00:30:21,053 --> 00:30:24,648 # Defying gravity # 516 00:30:24,723 --> 00:30:27,157 # I think I'll try # 517 00:30:27,226 --> 00:30:30,992 # Defying gravity # 518 00:30:31,063 --> 00:30:33,395 # Kiss me good-bye # 519 00:30:33,465 --> 00:30:36,764 # I'm defying gravity # 520 00:30:36,835 --> 00:30:40,362 # And you won't bring me down # 521 00:30:45,344 --> 00:30:48,404 # I'm through accepting limits # 522 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:51,210 # 'Cause someone says they're so # 523 00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:53,877 # There's some things I cannot change # 524 00:30:53,952 --> 00:30:57,513 # But till I try I'll never know # 525 00:30:57,589 --> 00:31:00,524 # Too long I've been afraid # 526 00:31:00,592 --> 00:31:03,891 # Of losing love I guess I've lost # 527 00:31:03,962 --> 00:31:10,390 # Well, if that's love it comes at much too high a cost # 528 00:31:10,469 --> 00:31:12,960 # I'd sooner buy # 529 00:31:13,038 --> 00:31:16,371 # Defying gravity # 530 00:31:16,441 --> 00:31:19,137 # Kiss me good-bye # 531 00:31:19,211 --> 00:31:22,772 # I'm defying gravity # 532 00:31:22,848 --> 00:31:25,578 # I think I'll try # 533 00:31:25,651 --> 00:31:28,950 # Defying gravity # 534 00:31:29,021 --> 00:31:32,582 # And you won't bring me down # 535 00:31:32,658 --> 00:31:34,990 # I'd sooner buy # 536 00:31:35,060 --> 00:31:38,723 # Defying gravity # 537 00:31:38,797 --> 00:31:41,391 # Kiss me good-bye # 538 00:31:41,466 --> 00:31:45,095 # I'm defying gravity # 539 00:31:45,170 --> 00:31:47,661 # I think I'll try # 540 00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:51,038 # Defying gravity # 541 00:31:51,109 --> 00:31:55,170 [Off-key] # And you won't bring me down # 542 00:31:55,247 --> 00:31:58,648 # Bring me down # 543 00:31:58,717 --> 00:32:03,950 ## [Vocalizing] 544 00:32:04,022 --> 00:32:05,956 ## [Ends] 545 00:32:08,594 --> 00:32:10,585 [Applause] 546 00:32:12,064 --> 00:32:14,294 [Will] Good job, Kurt. Good job. 547 00:32:14,366 --> 00:32:16,357 [School Bell Rings] 548 00:32:18,537 --> 00:32:20,869 Hey, wait up. 549 00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:25,342 I cracked open the piggy bank. It's for you. Well, it's for "it." 550 00:32:25,410 --> 00:32:27,605 "It" is a she. 551 00:32:29,081 --> 00:32:31,879 Cool. I told you I wasn't a deadbeat. 552 00:32:31,950 --> 00:32:34,885 Look, Puck, this is really sweet, but... 553 00:32:34,953 --> 00:32:36,944 I can get more. 554 00:32:38,223 --> 00:32:40,817 People call me a screwup because... 555 00:32:40,892 --> 00:32:42,917 I think school's for suckers. 556 00:32:42,995 --> 00:32:45,623 But I got ambition. 557 00:32:45,697 --> 00:32:51,135 Get us a house, some stuff, furniture. We could be a family. 558 00:32:53,138 --> 00:32:55,231 Finn is your best friend. 559 00:32:55,307 --> 00:32:57,241 He'd be pissed for a while. 560 00:32:57,309 --> 00:33:01,905 But then he'd realize he doesn't have to deal with all this. He'd bake me a damn cake. 561 00:33:01,980 --> 00:33:04,005 You stole from the cupcake fund. 562 00:33:04,082 --> 00:33:06,380 No, I didn't. 563 00:33:06,451 --> 00:33:09,045 [Sighs] Fine. I did. 564 00:33:09,121 --> 00:33:11,248 I made all those cupcakes. 565 00:33:11,323 --> 00:33:14,383 I'm all about being a team player, but my family comes first. 566 00:33:16,128 --> 00:33:21,088 I get it. And... I'm sorry. 567 00:33:21,166 --> 00:33:25,102 I should've never called you a Lima loser. You're not. 568 00:33:25,170 --> 00:33:29,903 You're special and romantic... 569 00:33:29,975 --> 00:33:33,502 and a good enough person to realize that... 570 00:33:33,578 --> 00:33:36,172 we are not gonna take money from a friend in a wheelchair. 571 00:33:37,649 --> 00:33:39,344 Hey. 572 00:33:43,088 --> 00:33:44,953 Here. 573 00:33:45,023 --> 00:33:48,049 - What's this? - I got a job. 574 00:33:48,126 --> 00:33:50,617 Excuse me. 575 00:33:50,696 --> 00:33:52,288 - Are you the manager? - Yes. 576 00:33:52,364 --> 00:33:55,026 You need to hire my friend Finn. He is clearly "handicapable"... 577 00:33:55,100 --> 00:33:58,126 and refusing to hire him could be seen as discrimination. 578 00:33:58,203 --> 00:34:00,763 My dads are gay. And unless you want the full force... 579 00:34:00,839 --> 00:34:02,932 of the American Civil Liberties Union coming down on you... 580 00:34:03,008 --> 00:34:06,102 I'd work something out. 581 00:34:06,178 --> 00:34:08,806 Gonna need to stay in my wheelchair as long as I'm working there. 582 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,144 But... screw it. It's worth it. 583 00:34:12,351 --> 00:34:15,377 Can I give you a lift to rehearsal? 584 00:34:23,695 --> 00:34:25,788 [School Bell Rings] 585 00:34:29,067 --> 00:34:31,763 1,200 bucks. That's enough for the short bus... 586 00:34:31,837 --> 00:34:33,828 and two cases of Natty light for the ride home. 587 00:34:33,905 --> 00:34:37,272 - Ah. Dream on, brother. - [Applause] 588 00:34:37,342 --> 00:34:39,276 [Sighs] 589 00:34:39,344 --> 00:34:41,437 I'm very proud of you guys. 590 00:34:43,815 --> 00:34:46,079 Artie. 591 00:34:46,151 --> 00:34:48,085 Why don't you bring this to Principal Figgins yourself. 592 00:34:48,153 --> 00:34:51,919 - All right, Artie. - [Girl] Go, Artie! 593 00:34:54,092 --> 00:34:58,756 - What's wrong, dude? - I really appreciate what you guys did for me. 594 00:34:58,830 --> 00:35:02,027 But I'm not the only kid in a wheelchair at this school. 595 00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:05,194 And I'm sure there'll be others after I graduate. 596 00:35:05,270 --> 00:35:08,933 And I know how important it is for all of us to go to sectionals together... 597 00:35:09,007 --> 00:35:11,703 but I think I'd rather just get a ride from my dad... 598 00:35:11,777 --> 00:35:15,042 and use this for a handicap ramp in the auditorium. 599 00:35:16,748 --> 00:35:18,340 Any objections? 600 00:35:18,417 --> 00:35:21,284 Well, it sure beats having to carry him in every day. 601 00:35:26,425 --> 00:35:29,861 You think she has a brain tumor? That can cause erratic behavior. 602 00:35:29,928 --> 00:35:33,193 All I know is that she walked in unannounced... 603 00:35:33,265 --> 00:35:37,201 and she wrote me a check for three new handicap ramps. 604 00:35:37,269 --> 00:35:40,864 I just don't get it. I mean, first, putting Becky in Cheerios. 605 00:35:40,939 --> 00:35:43,499 Now this. What is her angle? 606 00:35:43,575 --> 00:35:47,841 Why ask why? Just enjoy the fact that you're getting your bus after all. 607 00:35:51,783 --> 00:35:54,377 - How's she doing? - Great. 608 00:35:54,453 --> 00:35:58,048 She asks about you. She's been watching you on TV. 609 00:35:58,123 --> 00:36:00,216 I need to get here more often. 610 00:36:00,292 --> 00:36:02,226 Oh, you get here plenty. 611 00:36:02,294 --> 00:36:04,819 - [Knocking] - Jean? 612 00:36:04,896 --> 00:36:06,830 Your little sister's here to see you. 613 00:36:06,898 --> 00:36:08,661 - Hey, Sue! - Hi, honey! 614 00:36:08,733 --> 00:36:11,634 - My sister's famous! - You got that right. 615 00:36:11,703 --> 00:36:13,933 I got something for you. 616 00:36:14,005 --> 00:36:16,030 What's this? 617 00:36:16,107 --> 00:36:19,508 - Wow! A pom-pom. Thank you. - That's for you. 618 00:36:19,578 --> 00:36:22,513 - What do you feel like doing today? - Can we read today? 619 00:36:22,581 --> 00:36:24,947 - Look what I have. - Little Red Riding Hood. 620 00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:26,779 Right. Your favorite book. 621 00:36:26,852 --> 00:36:28,285 Wanna start at the beginning? 622 00:36:28,353 --> 00:36:30,048 - Yes. - All right. 623 00:36:30,121 --> 00:36:32,612 - You ready? - Ready. 624 00:36:38,263 --> 00:36:41,562 [Chuckles] 625 00:36:41,633 --> 00:36:45,262 "Once upon a time... 626 00:36:45,337 --> 00:36:49,103 "there was a little girl who lived in the forest. 627 00:36:49,174 --> 00:36:54,077 "Whenever she went out, the little girl wore a red riding cloak. 628 00:36:54,145 --> 00:36:58,878 So everyone in the village called her Little Red Riding Hood." 629 00:36:58,950 --> 00:37:00,781 - Right? - Right. 630 00:37:01,853 --> 00:37:03,377 [Laughter] 631 00:37:03,455 --> 00:37:08,154 - Oh, no! Oh, you're so much faster! - You can't keep up. 632 00:37:08,226 --> 00:37:11,161 I can't! This is so hard... No! 633 00:37:11,229 --> 00:37:14,756 [Groans] No, this wasn't fair. You've had eight years of practice. 634 00:37:14,833 --> 00:37:18,234 Excelling at wheelchair races is about my only advantage. 635 00:37:18,303 --> 00:37:22,967 It's like your stutter. It's mostly just a big hassle. 636 00:37:23,041 --> 00:37:27,068 This has been a really fun date. 637 00:37:27,145 --> 00:37:29,841 But... I wanna get out of this chair. 638 00:37:29,915 --> 00:37:31,314 Why? 639 00:37:31,383 --> 00:37:36,582 So... I can do this. 640 00:37:48,667 --> 00:37:51,033 I have to tell you something. 641 00:37:51,102 --> 00:37:54,196 I've been faking it. 642 00:37:54,272 --> 00:37:56,035 Faking what? 643 00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:58,007 I don't have a stutter. 644 00:37:59,210 --> 00:38:02,941 I pretended to have one in sixth grade because... 645 00:38:03,014 --> 00:38:06,711 I didn't wanna give a speech on the Missouri Compromise. 646 00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:09,049 I was really shy. 647 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:13,489 And it made people think I was weird, so they left me alone. 648 00:38:13,558 --> 00:38:17,460 And it wasn't until I joined Glee Club that I realized... 649 00:38:17,529 --> 00:38:20,987 how much I was missing. 650 00:38:21,066 --> 00:38:24,126 I don't wanna push people away anymore. 651 00:38:24,202 --> 00:38:26,193 You understand what that's like, don't you? 652 00:38:26,271 --> 00:38:29,001 No. I don't. 653 00:38:30,442 --> 00:38:32,376 I would never try to push people away... 654 00:38:32,444 --> 00:38:34,344 'cause being in a chair kind of does that for you. 655 00:38:35,981 --> 00:38:39,747 I thought we had something really important in common. 656 00:38:42,153 --> 00:38:45,520 Wait. Artie, I'm sorry. 657 00:38:45,590 --> 00:38:49,151 I am too. I'm sorry now you get to be normal... 658 00:38:49,227 --> 00:38:52,321 and I'm gonna be stuck in this chair the rest of my life. 659 00:38:52,397 --> 00:38:55,560 And that's not something I can fake. 660 00:39:00,672 --> 00:39:03,072 - [Tool Whirring Loudly] - Hey, Dad. 661 00:39:03,141 --> 00:39:05,109 - What are you doing? - I'm makin' biscuits. 662 00:39:05,176 --> 00:39:07,269 What does it look like I'm doing? How'd the tryout go? 663 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:10,739 They gave the part to Rachel. 664 00:39:10,815 --> 00:39:12,749 I knew they were gonna rig it! 665 00:39:12,817 --> 00:39:15,411 I'm goin' down to that school and I'm talkin' to Schuester. 666 00:39:15,487 --> 00:39:17,546 I blew the note. 667 00:39:18,623 --> 00:39:20,352 I wanted to lose. 668 00:39:20,425 --> 00:39:24,361 Kurt, I stuck my neck out for you, and you go and you throw the game? 669 00:39:28,133 --> 00:39:30,567 Dad. 670 00:39:30,635 --> 00:39:33,365 I've known who I was since I was five. 671 00:39:33,438 --> 00:39:37,033 I adapted. Being different made me stronger. 672 00:39:38,977 --> 00:39:42,140 At the end of the day, it's what's gonna get me out of this cow town. 673 00:39:42,213 --> 00:39:44,147 You never had to do that. 674 00:39:44,215 --> 00:39:46,308 I can handle myself just fine. 675 00:39:46,384 --> 00:39:49,785 No, you can't. Not about this. 676 00:39:51,389 --> 00:39:54,153 That phone call yesterday was just the beginning... 677 00:39:54,225 --> 00:39:57,558 especially if I get up in front of a thousand people to sing a girl's song. 678 00:39:59,064 --> 00:40:03,797 When I saw you right after you got the call... 679 00:40:03,868 --> 00:40:08,430 and you were... so hurt and so upset... 680 00:40:12,944 --> 00:40:14,571 it just killed me. 681 00:40:16,514 --> 00:40:20,814 I'm not saying I'm gonna hide in the closet. 682 00:40:20,885 --> 00:40:24,912 I'm-I'm proud of who I am. 683 00:40:24,989 --> 00:40:29,449 I'm just saying that I love you more than I love being a star. 684 00:40:31,196 --> 00:40:34,131 You are your mother. 685 00:40:34,199 --> 00:40:39,660 You know, she was always the strong one. Look, uh... 686 00:40:39,738 --> 00:40:43,265 you wanna help me put a 195 on this bad boy? 687 00:40:43,341 --> 00:40:45,605 Let me change into my coveralls. 688 00:40:45,677 --> 00:40:47,611 This sweater's an Alexander McQueen. 689 00:40:51,683 --> 00:40:53,617 ## [Pop] 690 00:40:53,685 --> 00:40:55,516 # Rollin' # 691 00:40:55,720 --> 00:40:58,120 # Rollin' # 692 00:40:58,189 --> 00:41:00,453 # Rollin' on a river # 693 00:41:00,525 --> 00:41:02,857 This one's for you, Artie! 694 00:41:02,927 --> 00:41:07,193 - # Left a good job in the city # - # Down in the city # 695 00:41:07,265 --> 00:41:11,668 # Workin' for the man every night and day # 696 00:41:11,736 --> 00:41:15,797 # And I never lost one minute of sleepin' # 697 00:41:15,874 --> 00:41:19,810 # I was worrying about the way that things might have been # 698 00:41:19,878 --> 00:41:23,507 # Big wheel keep on turnin' # 699 00:41:23,581 --> 00:41:29,019 # Ooh, the proud Mary keep on burnin' # 700 00:41:29,087 --> 00:41:31,419 - # And we're rollin' # - # Rollin' # 701 00:41:31,489 --> 00:41:33,389 - # Rollin' , yeah # - # Rollin' # 702 00:41:33,458 --> 00:41:35,756 # Rollin' on the river # 703 00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:40,696 # Rollin' on the river # 704 00:41:40,765 --> 00:41:42,596 ## [Tempo Increases] 705 00:41:45,503 --> 00:41:48,529 # So I left a good job in the city # 706 00:41:48,606 --> 00:41:51,541 # Workin' for the man every night and day # 707 00:41:51,609 --> 00:41:54,169 # And I never lost one minute of sleepin' # 708 00:41:54,245 --> 00:41:56,770 # Worryin' about the way things might have been # 709 00:41:56,848 --> 00:41:58,748 - # Big wheel keep on turnin' # - # Turnin' # 710 00:41:58,817 --> 00:42:01,843 # Proud Mary keep on burnin' # 711 00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:03,012 - # Burnin' # - # Rollin' # 712 00:42:03,087 --> 00:42:04,349 - # Rollin' # - # Rollin' # 713 00:42:04,422 --> 00:42:06,686 - # Yeah # - # Rollin' on the river # 714 00:42:06,758 --> 00:42:07,850 # Rollin' on the river # 715 00:42:07,926 --> 00:42:09,291 - # Rollin' # - # Rollin' # 716 00:42:09,360 --> 00:42:10,850 - # Rollin' # - # Yeah # 717 00:42:10,929 --> 00:42:13,193 # Rollin' on the river # 718 00:42:13,264 --> 00:42:16,097 ## [All Vocalizing] 719 00:42:23,107 --> 00:42:24,369 # Yeah # 720 00:42:28,613 --> 00:42:31,309 - # If you come down to the river # - # Doo, doo, doo, doo # 721 00:42:31,382 --> 00:42:33,441 # Bet you gonna find some people who live # 722 00:42:33,518 --> 00:42:36,715 # You don't have to worry if you have the money # 723 00:42:36,788 --> 00:42:39,382 # People on the river are happy to give # 724 00:42:39,457 --> 00:42:42,119 - # Big wheel keep on turnin' # - # Oh, yeah # 725 00:42:42,193 --> 00:42:44,559 - # Proud Mary keep on burnin' # - # Burnin' # 726 00:42:44,629 --> 00:42:47,393 - # Rollin' , rollin' # - # Rollin' # 727 00:42:47,465 --> 00:42:50,093 - # Rollin' on the river # - # Rollin' on the river # 728 00:42:50,168 --> 00:42:51,795 - # Rollin' # - # Rollin' # 729 00:42:51,870 --> 00:42:53,497 - # Rollin' # - # Yeah # 730 00:42:53,571 --> 00:42:55,903 - # Rollin' on the river # - # Rollin' on the river # 731 00:42:55,974 --> 00:42:58,238 ## [All Vocalizing] 732 00:42:58,309 --> 00:43:00,834 # Yeah # 733 00:43:00,912 --> 00:43:04,245 # Hey # 734 00:43:04,315 --> 00:43:07,807 # Oh, yeah ## 735 00:43:07,886 --> 00:43:09,820 [Chatter, Applause] 736 00:43:14,993 --> 00:43:18,121 - Oh, my God! How do you do it? - Whoo! 737 00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:26,633 ## [Vocalizing] 738 00:43:26,704 --> 00:43:30,367 ## [Harmonic Vocalizing] 739 00:43:46,357 --> 00:43:48,291 ## [Ends] 740 00:43:57,302 --> 00:43:58,291 English - US - SDH extracted by rogard