1 00:00:44,300 --> 00:00:48,669 ln New York City, there's a fine line between law and chaos. 2 00:00:48,771 --> 00:00:51,535 On that line live Danson and Highsmith. 3 00:00:54,777 --> 00:00:57,268 Tell me again why l decided to get on this roof! 4 00:00:58,214 --> 00:01:01,650 l think you can chalk that up to bad life choices. 5 00:01:17,833 --> 00:01:18,959 Get rid of that asshole. 6 00:01:19,034 --> 00:01:21,002 - Uh-oh! - l hate it when you say ''uh-oh!'' 7 00:01:31,547 --> 00:01:33,481 Dude, you put a ding in my hood! 8 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:38,578 Come on with it, then! 9 00:01:44,193 --> 00:01:45,990 Whoa, hey! 10 00:01:52,868 --> 00:01:54,199 That's trouble. 11 00:02:08,884 --> 00:02:12,342 Did someone call Nine-One-holy-shit? 12 00:02:22,698 --> 00:02:24,598 That's it. l'm sick of all this running. 13 00:02:32,508 --> 00:02:33,600 Hang on! 14 00:02:44,086 --> 00:02:49,991 You have the right to remain silent! 15 00:02:50,526 --> 00:02:53,120 But l wanna hear you scream! 16 00:03:08,611 --> 00:03:09,703 Down on the ground! 17 00:03:10,012 --> 00:03:12,207 Detective! Yeah, yeah! Detective! 18 00:03:12,881 --> 00:03:14,940 One at a time, all right? 19 00:03:15,284 --> 00:03:19,311 Yeah, Detectives, Rick Grayson, New York Observer Online. 20 00:03:19,455 --> 00:03:22,356 These suspects were caught with only a quarter pound of marijuana, 21 00:03:22,458 --> 00:03:23,857 a misdemeanor in some states. 22 00:03:23,959 --> 00:03:27,190 Do you think this arrest was worth $12 million in property damages? 23 00:03:27,396 --> 00:03:30,627 Why don't we let New York City answer that question? 24 00:03:30,699 --> 00:03:33,190 The greatest city on Earth, yeah! 25 00:03:36,372 --> 00:03:39,739 Hi, Sarah Gapone from TMZ print edition. 26 00:03:39,842 --> 00:03:43,403 Danson, are the rumors about you and Kim Kardashian true? 27 00:03:43,512 --> 00:03:45,070 No comment. 28 00:03:45,547 --> 00:03:46,912 But, yes. 29 00:03:48,484 --> 00:03:51,976 Danson and Highsmith, free hot dogs for life! 30 00:03:55,424 --> 00:03:59,588 No drinks. No drinks. l can't do it. l can't do it. 31 00:03:59,928 --> 00:04:05,389 Danson and Highsmith shoot, drive, and sex with style. They're rock stars. 32 00:04:05,501 --> 00:04:08,493 Then you got your jokers, your ball busters, your vets... 33 00:04:09,605 --> 00:04:11,505 ...and the other guys. 34 00:04:14,410 --> 00:04:17,436 We know, we know. We know. 35 00:04:17,546 --> 00:04:19,707 All right, all right, all right. Listen up, listen up! 36 00:04:19,782 --> 00:04:23,343 We're having a celebration tonight at Butter. 37 00:04:23,419 --> 00:04:26,013 Brody Jenner's gonna be there. Bai Ling. 38 00:04:26,088 --> 00:04:28,886 - That little short bitch from Jersey Shore. - Yeah! 39 00:04:28,957 --> 00:04:32,051 And most of you are on the list. 40 00:04:32,127 --> 00:04:34,061 You're the best. 41 00:04:34,129 --> 00:04:36,097 Guys, l'm gonna say something right now. 42 00:04:36,198 --> 00:04:38,564 lt's about a man who came from Austria with a dream. 43 00:04:38,634 --> 00:04:41,467 - Arnold Schwarzenegger! - Let me finish. 44 00:04:41,570 --> 00:04:43,936 He became a champion and then a movie star, all right? 45 00:04:44,039 --> 00:04:46,200 - Arnold Schwarzenegger! - God damn it, let me... 46 00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:48,209 They ruined the story. They ruined the story. 47 00:04:48,277 --> 00:04:49,904 Let... What... The point is, 48 00:04:49,978 --> 00:04:53,072 we couldn't do our job if it weren't for you guys doing all the paperwork, 49 00:04:53,148 --> 00:04:55,446 answering the phones, and all that stupid shit that we don't like to do. 50 00:04:55,551 --> 00:04:57,542 All the gun fights, all the car chases, 51 00:04:57,619 --> 00:05:01,487 all the sex we don't wanna have with women, but we have to, 52 00:05:01,590 --> 00:05:05,253 all due to what you guys do. Thank you. 53 00:05:05,327 --> 00:05:06,589 And we'd do it again and again. 54 00:05:06,662 --> 00:05:08,960 Hey, you shut your face! 55 00:05:09,064 --> 00:05:10,258 lf we wanna hear you talk, 56 00:05:10,332 --> 00:05:13,233 l will shove my arm up your ass and work your mouth like a puppet! 57 00:05:13,435 --> 00:05:14,993 You hear me? You hear me? 58 00:05:15,571 --> 00:05:17,471 - Cash bar. - Yeah. 59 00:05:17,573 --> 00:05:19,404 Peace out, bitches. 60 00:05:20,776 --> 00:05:23,745 Hey, fellas. All right, bring it in. 61 00:05:23,812 --> 00:05:25,302 Come on. Bring it in a little bit. 62 00:05:25,581 --> 00:05:27,572 All right, right there. 63 00:05:27,649 --> 00:05:29,617 Just back up, just like right there. 64 00:05:30,252 --> 00:05:32,311 All right, just one... Just a... 65 00:05:32,421 --> 00:05:34,150 There you go, right there. Right there. 66 00:05:34,757 --> 00:05:36,816 This is their paperwork. You know they're not gonna do it. 67 00:05:36,925 --> 00:05:40,122 That's right. This paperwork is like Bob's wife here. 68 00:05:40,195 --> 00:05:43,858 lt's thick, ugly, got Danson's fingerprints all over it. 69 00:05:43,966 --> 00:05:45,365 - No offense, Bob. - That's all right. 70 00:05:45,467 --> 00:05:47,594 - Anyway, now who wants it? - l do! 71 00:05:47,669 --> 00:05:50,331 All right! Paper Bitch and Yankee Clipper on the case! 72 00:05:51,106 --> 00:05:52,505 - Nice work. Thanks, Allen. - Thank you, Captain. 73 00:05:52,608 --> 00:05:53,870 ''l'll do it! l'll do it!'' 74 00:06:03,952 --> 00:06:06,045 Stop humming that song! 75 00:06:06,889 --> 00:06:09,881 - l can hum if l want to. - No, l know you can. 76 00:06:09,992 --> 00:06:11,220 l'm asking you to stop. 77 00:06:11,527 --> 00:06:13,552 - Well, if you're asking, then l'll stop. - Thank you. 78 00:06:19,067 --> 00:06:20,659 Could you not smile like that? 79 00:06:21,236 --> 00:06:24,569 Now you're asking me to mask my emotions because of how it makes you feel. 80 00:06:24,673 --> 00:06:26,470 That l will not do. 81 00:06:30,312 --> 00:06:33,145 Seriously, stop humming! Okay? 82 00:06:33,215 --> 00:06:35,240 This isn't accounting or wherever the hell 83 00:06:35,350 --> 00:06:38,683 you and your little pocket calculator were transferred from. 84 00:06:38,754 --> 00:06:41,723 Forensic accounting, okay. And it's an important part of the job. 85 00:06:41,824 --> 00:06:45,885 Yeah, whatever. Stop being so overtly happy about doing shit work, you moron. 86 00:06:45,994 --> 00:06:47,859 Hey, guys. Reminder. 87 00:06:47,930 --> 00:06:51,161 The police union picnic's coming up this weekend. 88 00:06:51,233 --> 00:06:55,863 My wife's making her famous deviled eggs, again. My waistline's furious. 89 00:06:55,938 --> 00:06:57,337 lt's a bad time, Bob! 90 00:06:57,773 --> 00:07:00,435 All right. 91 00:07:01,009 --> 00:07:02,101 Going to get a slice. 92 00:07:13,755 --> 00:07:15,552 You know what l just did? 93 00:07:15,624 --> 00:07:17,922 l just walked out that door, saw a couple detectives, 94 00:07:18,026 --> 00:07:20,517 and l was about to start bad mouthing you behind your back, 95 00:07:20,596 --> 00:07:22,791 but l stopped myself, because my pops taught me 96 00:07:22,898 --> 00:07:25,526 that a man who talks behind somebody's back is a coward. 97 00:07:25,601 --> 00:07:26,795 Wow, l actually appreciate that. 98 00:07:26,902 --> 00:07:28,699 Good, 'cause l'm gonna tell you directly to your face. 99 00:07:28,770 --> 00:07:31,534 - No. You don't have to. - No, l don't like you. 100 00:07:31,607 --> 00:07:33,040 l think you're a fake cop. 101 00:07:33,108 --> 00:07:36,874 The sound of your piss hitting the urinal? lt sounds feminine. 102 00:07:36,945 --> 00:07:39,709 lf we were in the wild, l would attack you. 103 00:07:39,781 --> 00:07:44,480 Even if you weren't in my food chain, l would go out of my way to attack you. 104 00:07:44,586 --> 00:07:46,144 lf l were a lion, and you were a tuna, 105 00:07:46,255 --> 00:07:48,849 l would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you! 106 00:07:49,324 --> 00:07:52,316 And then l'd bang your tuna girlfriend. 107 00:07:52,427 --> 00:07:56,761 Okay, first off, a lion swimming in the ocean? 108 00:07:56,832 --> 00:07:58,026 Lions don't like water. 109 00:07:58,467 --> 00:08:02,164 lf you'd placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source, that'd make sense. 110 00:08:02,471 --> 00:08:04,803 But you find yourself in the ocean, 20-foot waves, 111 00:08:04,873 --> 00:08:06,636 l'm assuming it's off the coast of South Africa, 112 00:08:07,009 --> 00:08:12,276 coming up against a full-grown, 800-pound tuna with his 20 or 30 friends? 113 00:08:12,347 --> 00:08:13,507 You lose that battle. 114 00:08:13,615 --> 00:08:16,516 You lose that battle nine times out of ten. And guess what? 115 00:08:16,618 --> 00:08:20,884 You've wandered into our school of tuna, and we now have a taste of lion. 116 00:08:20,989 --> 00:08:23,389 We've talked to ourselves. We've communicated. 117 00:08:23,492 --> 00:08:24,652 - Yeah? - And said, ''You know what? 118 00:08:24,726 --> 00:08:27,889 ''Lion tastes good. Let's go get some more lion.' ' 119 00:08:27,996 --> 00:08:30,556 We've developed a system to establish a beachhead 120 00:08:30,666 --> 00:08:33,567 and aggressively hunt you and your family. 121 00:08:33,669 --> 00:08:35,830 And we will corner your pride, 122 00:08:35,904 --> 00:08:37,804 - your children, your offspring. - How you gonna do that? 123 00:08:37,873 --> 00:08:41,468 We will construct a series of breathing apparatus with kelp. 124 00:08:41,543 --> 00:08:44,034 We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen. 125 00:08:44,146 --> 00:08:48,583 lt's not gonna be days at a time, but an hour, hour 45, no problem. 126 00:08:48,684 --> 00:08:51,346 That will give us enough time to figure out where you live, 127 00:08:51,420 --> 00:08:54,514 go back to the sea, get more oxygen, and then stalk you. 128 00:08:54,589 --> 00:08:58,081 You just lost at your own game. You're outgunned and outmanned. 129 00:09:01,563 --> 00:09:04,157 Did that go the way you thought it was gonna go? 130 00:09:04,232 --> 00:09:05,358 Nope. 131 00:09:12,941 --> 00:09:14,533 Two minutes before the markets open, 132 00:09:14,609 --> 00:09:17,874 Pamela Boardman, CEO of Lendl Global, ringing the opening bell. 133 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,548 With Boardman is investment banker, David Ershon, 134 00:09:20,615 --> 00:09:24,073 who manages 40% of Lendl's $70-billion equity pool. 135 00:09:24,186 --> 00:09:27,019 How much did we lose? 136 00:09:27,089 --> 00:09:29,387 You may ring the bell now, Ms. Boardman. 137 00:09:29,458 --> 00:09:31,551 - $32. - Million? 138 00:09:31,626 --> 00:09:33,856 No, billion. 139 00:09:35,964 --> 00:09:37,397 Shit! 140 00:09:38,166 --> 00:09:42,569 Chinatown. Three Triad gang members. l popped two of them off the draw. 141 00:09:42,738 --> 00:09:44,433 - Bang, bang. - Yeah. 142 00:09:44,539 --> 00:09:46,131 Then l raise up to take the leader out. 143 00:09:46,241 --> 00:09:47,731 Shit, l feel like l'm there now. 144 00:09:47,809 --> 00:09:50,004 l hear a whistle. My partner's on the roof. 145 00:09:50,579 --> 00:09:52,410 He says, ''Let's even the odds!'' 146 00:09:52,714 --> 00:09:56,912 He tosses me down a Mossberg pump. l send one through his chest. 147 00:09:57,953 --> 00:09:59,477 Game over, bitches. 148 00:10:01,556 --> 00:10:03,251 - All right. - Yeah. 149 00:10:04,225 --> 00:10:08,855 Jimmy? Let's talk about how that story made you feel. 150 00:10:09,431 --> 00:10:10,921 Like my cock was made out of concrete. 151 00:10:12,267 --> 00:10:14,167 l know it's very tempting. 152 00:10:14,669 --> 00:10:16,330 You want to impress your friends. 153 00:10:16,504 --> 00:10:18,995 But this is serious stuff we're dealing with, okay? 154 00:10:19,107 --> 00:10:22,508 This is firing your weapon in the line of duty. 155 00:10:22,611 --> 00:10:23,669 Officer Hoitz? 156 00:10:24,312 --> 00:10:25,643 Oh, man. 157 00:10:25,714 --> 00:10:26,874 - Come on! - Here we go. 158 00:10:26,948 --> 00:10:28,347 Would you like to share? 159 00:10:28,450 --> 00:10:29,576 No, l'd rather not. 160 00:10:29,918 --> 00:10:32,318 Officer Hoitz, you've been coming here for six months now, 161 00:10:32,420 --> 00:10:34,183 and you haven't said a word. 162 00:10:34,255 --> 00:10:36,621 This is a safe room, no judgment here. 163 00:10:36,691 --> 00:10:37,783 Jerkoff. 164 00:10:37,859 --> 00:10:40,157 That's judgment, Jimmy. Come on. 165 00:10:40,629 --> 00:10:41,755 l relive it every night. 166 00:10:43,131 --> 00:10:45,031 Bronx, October. 167 00:10:45,133 --> 00:10:46,930 Game 7 of the World Series. 168 00:10:47,002 --> 00:10:50,267 For all the marbles. High pressure, unruly crowd, and l pulled tunnel duty. 169 00:10:50,338 --> 00:10:53,171 l mean, l saw a shadowy figure in the tunnel. l told him to stop. 170 00:10:53,274 --> 00:10:55,174 Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is a restricted area! 171 00:10:55,276 --> 00:10:56,607 Finally pulled my gun. 172 00:10:56,678 --> 00:10:57,975 Pulled a deadly weapon. He started running at me. 173 00:10:58,046 --> 00:10:59,946 Don't make me shoot! l'll do it! 174 00:11:01,182 --> 00:11:03,047 Are you deaf? You hear me yell, ''Freeze''? 175 00:11:03,151 --> 00:11:06,279 You dick! l'm Derek Jeter! You shot me! 176 00:11:06,354 --> 00:11:09,118 - You cost me 20 grand on that game! - Douche bag. 177 00:11:09,190 --> 00:11:10,657 Cost the city a championship. 178 00:11:10,725 --> 00:11:13,057 l was being groomed for a top position in homicide. 179 00:11:13,294 --> 00:11:16,024 Now l'm stuck with a desk jockey partner. Everybody calls me the Yankee Clipper. 180 00:11:16,131 --> 00:11:17,792 Because you shot Derek Jeter! 181 00:11:17,866 --> 00:11:19,163 He's a biracial angel. 182 00:11:19,234 --> 00:11:20,895 You should've shot A-Rod. 183 00:11:28,510 --> 00:11:29,875 Yo, Paper Bitch. 184 00:11:30,245 --> 00:11:31,906 - What's up, man? - Hey. Hey, guys. 185 00:11:32,013 --> 00:11:33,708 - Paper Bitch. - Paper Bitch. 186 00:11:33,815 --> 00:11:34,873 l don't like that, actually. 187 00:11:34,983 --> 00:11:36,746 l know you guys think it's fun, but l don't like that name. 188 00:11:36,851 --> 00:11:38,409 Still working on the Danson and Highsmith paperwork? 189 00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:40,579 - Shit. - No, actually, actually, that's... 190 00:11:40,689 --> 00:11:42,054 What is this? That looks stupid. 191 00:11:42,157 --> 00:11:45,752 Guys, it's illegal permitting for construction. Specifically, scaffolding. 192 00:11:45,860 --> 00:11:47,384 Some of the guys were talking. 193 00:11:47,696 --> 00:11:50,256 They were like, ''How come you've never fired your weapon in the office before?'' 194 00:11:50,331 --> 00:11:51,059 Good point. 195 00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:53,131 l'm sorry, l don't follow. 196 00:11:53,234 --> 00:11:54,667 You've never fired your weapon in the office. 197 00:11:54,769 --> 00:11:56,896 We all have, you know. lt's called a desk pop. 198 00:11:56,971 --> 00:11:59,667 Fellas, look, l know you don't respect me as a police officer. 199 00:11:59,774 --> 00:12:00,900 - Not true. - l'm not stupid. 200 00:12:00,975 --> 00:12:03,443 l'm not gonna discharge my firearm in the office. 201 00:12:03,511 --> 00:12:05,103 Gamble, listen to me. l'll try to make it real clear. 202 00:12:05,180 --> 00:12:09,344 We honor the flag, and you crap on it when you don't shoot your gun in the office. 203 00:12:09,451 --> 00:12:11,510 Jimmy. When's the last time you had a desk pop? 204 00:12:11,619 --> 00:12:13,246 September '08. 205 00:12:13,954 --> 00:12:15,683 - Be a man. Do it. - Now. 206 00:12:15,789 --> 00:12:17,450 - Please, please, do it. - Pop one off! 207 00:12:17,525 --> 00:12:19,618 - There you go. Pop it off! - Don't think, just go! 208 00:12:19,693 --> 00:12:21,251 - Here we go. - Do it, yes. 209 00:12:22,830 --> 00:12:23,922 He did it! 210 00:12:24,031 --> 00:12:25,862 Hey! Shots fired! 211 00:12:25,966 --> 00:12:29,094 Hey, Terry, l did it! l did my first desk pop! 212 00:12:29,603 --> 00:12:31,161 lt's a real thing, right? 213 00:12:31,272 --> 00:12:32,762 - A desk pop? - Yeah. 214 00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:33,966 No, that's not real! 215 00:12:34,041 --> 00:12:38,000 They were so convincing in their argument, they swung me. 216 00:12:41,015 --> 00:12:42,846 All right, Allen, you're gonna have to hand over your gun. 217 00:12:42,950 --> 00:12:44,042 Yes, sir. 218 00:12:44,151 --> 00:12:48,144 Captain, you really wanna disarm this guy, take out the batteries in the calculator. 219 00:12:48,222 --> 00:12:51,623 All right, l'm gonna give you this. This is a dummy gun. l use it for ceremony. 220 00:12:51,692 --> 00:12:52,852 There. 221 00:12:54,194 --> 00:12:57,789 You get this back when l feel you know how to handle it. 222 00:12:58,399 --> 00:13:02,062 Listen, guys. l'm working two jobs. l'm working here. 223 00:13:02,169 --> 00:13:05,332 And l got another job at Bed Bath and Beyond. Okay? 224 00:13:05,406 --> 00:13:08,034 l'm doing that just to put a kid through NYU 225 00:13:08,108 --> 00:13:11,874 so he can explore his bisexuality and become a deejay. 226 00:13:11,946 --> 00:13:15,404 Now the last thing l need is a ballistics report in the unit. 227 00:13:15,516 --> 00:13:17,882 l'm just gonna ask you guys, please, come on, really. 228 00:13:17,952 --> 00:13:19,715 Just think about... Just be smart. 229 00:13:49,249 --> 00:13:50,716 211 in progress. 230 00:13:50,784 --> 00:13:53,878 They're using a wrecking ball to clean out Castien Jewelry. 231 00:13:53,954 --> 00:13:55,387 All right, we got it. 232 00:13:55,456 --> 00:13:57,788 - Good luck, guys. Have a good one. - Allen, let's go. 233 00:13:57,891 --> 00:14:00,758 - No, l got work to do. - What? This is work! 234 00:14:00,828 --> 00:14:04,423 Hey, yo! Danson and Highsmith. We roll in heavy. 235 00:14:04,498 --> 00:14:05,829 You cream puffs, sit tight. 236 00:14:05,933 --> 00:14:07,264 You gotta be shitting me! 237 00:14:07,768 --> 00:14:10,430 You can't keep me cooped up in here, okay? 238 00:14:10,504 --> 00:14:13,598 l am a peacock! You gotta let me fly! 239 00:14:19,780 --> 00:14:21,975 Did he just... Did he just call himself a peacock? 240 00:14:25,519 --> 00:14:26,747 Let's go! Let's go! 241 00:14:29,790 --> 00:14:30,848 Come on, fellas! 242 00:14:31,091 --> 00:14:33,491 Wednesday night is taco night at Rikers lsland! 243 00:14:47,341 --> 00:14:48,968 That's the second one this week! 244 00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:52,335 Hey, you monkeys! Stop! 245 00:14:53,013 --> 00:14:54,139 Let's go! 246 00:14:54,982 --> 00:14:56,040 Yeah! 247 00:14:56,617 --> 00:14:57,811 Heads up! 248 00:14:58,152 --> 00:14:59,278 Shit. 249 00:15:13,367 --> 00:15:14,459 Special Forces zipline. 250 00:15:15,069 --> 00:15:16,832 Cut that line! Cut it! Let's go! 251 00:15:18,072 --> 00:15:20,336 - These guys are pros. - Let's go! 252 00:15:20,407 --> 00:15:21,806 You thinking what l'm thinking, partner? 253 00:15:22,409 --> 00:15:23,501 Aim for the bushes. 254 00:15:51,105 --> 00:15:54,768 Cops still argue to this day why Danson and Highsmith jumped. 255 00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:58,834 Maybe it was just pride, having survived so many brushes with death. 256 00:15:58,912 --> 00:16:01,073 Maybe their egos pushed them off. 257 00:16:01,181 --> 00:16:03,877 l don't know. But that shit was crazy. 258 00:16:03,951 --> 00:16:08,684 Either way, there was a hole in New York City, and it needed to be filled. 259 00:16:08,756 --> 00:16:11,054 Two days ago, this city wept. 260 00:16:11,125 --> 00:16:15,084 We lost two heroes who gave everything for us, 261 00:16:15,195 --> 00:16:20,098 who paid that ultimate sacrifice so that we may walk these streets safely. 262 00:16:21,034 --> 00:16:22,592 There wasn't even an awning in their direction. 263 00:16:22,703 --> 00:16:24,864 - No, l know. - They just jumped 20 stories. 264 00:16:24,938 --> 00:16:26,269 Doesn't make sense, does it? 265 00:16:26,373 --> 00:16:30,241 l only hope God lets them take their.357s with them to heaven. 266 00:16:30,310 --> 00:16:33,643 lt's our moment, Allen. Our moment to step up and be the guys. 267 00:16:34,148 --> 00:16:36,810 - We're at a funeral. Show some respect. - What? 268 00:16:37,117 --> 00:16:40,143 You don't think every other detective here isn't thinking the same thing? 269 00:16:42,956 --> 00:16:45,049 Allen, listen to me. Danson and Highsmith are gone. 270 00:16:45,125 --> 00:16:48,117 Their desks are empty. Someone has to fill those seats. 271 00:16:48,228 --> 00:16:51,755 That someone is us, okay? The city's dying for a hero. 272 00:16:52,099 --> 00:16:53,589 - ls it? - Yeah. 273 00:16:53,667 --> 00:16:57,296 What about nine million socially-conscious and unified citizens, 274 00:16:57,404 --> 00:16:59,133 all just stepping up and doing their part? 275 00:16:59,239 --> 00:17:01,469 As a little kid, didn't you dress up and play cops and robbers? 276 00:17:01,575 --> 00:17:03,736 l'll tell you what l did as a little kid. 277 00:17:03,811 --> 00:17:06,143 l went to school and made my bed. 278 00:17:06,246 --> 00:17:08,840 And at age 11, l audited my parents. 279 00:17:08,949 --> 00:17:12,248 And believe me, there were some discrepancies, and l was grounded. 280 00:17:12,319 --> 00:17:14,184 What the hell are you? 281 00:17:14,288 --> 00:17:17,257 Well, well, well. What do we got here? 282 00:17:17,324 --> 00:17:21,420 Look at these two jamokes, would you? One shot Jeter and the other shot an office. 283 00:17:24,698 --> 00:17:27,428 Have some decorum. We're at a funeral. 284 00:17:27,501 --> 00:17:29,696 You wanna dance, brolio? 285 00:17:29,803 --> 00:17:34,035 l will rock your body with big, nasty hooks. You'll be pissing blood out of your ass. 286 00:17:34,141 --> 00:17:35,199 That's horrible. 287 00:17:35,309 --> 00:17:36,469 Why don't you step back, man? 288 00:17:36,543 --> 00:17:38,010 You touch him, l swear to God 289 00:17:38,111 --> 00:17:39,942 l'm gonna beat the shit out of you with Allen's head. 290 00:17:40,013 --> 00:17:42,538 He's not gonna do that. That's hyperbole. But that's a weird example. 291 00:17:42,649 --> 00:17:44,446 - You wanna go? - l wanna go! 292 00:17:45,853 --> 00:17:47,218 - Get him off. - Kick his ass, Martin. 293 00:17:47,855 --> 00:17:49,049 Yeah. How do you like that? 294 00:17:50,457 --> 00:17:51,981 - Pull his hair! - l love it. 295 00:17:52,192 --> 00:17:53,853 This hurts so good. 296 00:17:54,795 --> 00:17:56,956 - Very sorry for your loss, ma'am. - What a lovely hat. 297 00:17:57,030 --> 00:17:58,588 l love your shoes. 298 00:17:59,165 --> 00:18:00,689 - lt's fine, it's fine. - Go, go. 299 00:18:01,334 --> 00:18:02,460 Punish him! 300 00:18:03,036 --> 00:18:04,560 Oh, man. 301 00:18:05,238 --> 00:18:07,206 Do it. That's how we do it in the hood. 302 00:18:07,307 --> 00:18:08,501 - Punish him. - That's not even a move. 303 00:18:09,743 --> 00:18:12,041 l'm the winner. l'm the winner, everybody saw it. 304 00:18:12,145 --> 00:18:14,113 What the hell is going on here? 305 00:18:14,681 --> 00:18:16,239 Two good men are dead, 306 00:18:16,316 --> 00:18:19,410 and you guys are fighting over who's gonna be the next hotshot? 307 00:18:19,486 --> 00:18:20,612 ls that what's happening? 308 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:22,244 Yes, that's exactly what's happening. 309 00:18:23,490 --> 00:18:24,980 Let me tell you something. 310 00:18:25,658 --> 00:18:26,989 - Sorry for your loss, Lorraine. - Very sorry. 311 00:18:27,494 --> 00:18:29,394 - Sorry, Lorraine. - Sorry, Lorraine. 312 00:18:29,929 --> 00:18:31,226 Hi, l'm Jimmy. 313 00:18:32,432 --> 00:18:34,093 - Too soon? - Why'd you say that? 314 00:18:34,667 --> 00:18:36,259 l'll tell you something about those guys. 315 00:18:37,303 --> 00:18:40,932 They knew that to become a good cop, you had to solve cases. Okay? 316 00:18:41,741 --> 00:18:45,006 Okay, and maybe you start with the Castien robbery. 317 00:18:45,445 --> 00:18:47,675 Okay? So just watch it. 318 00:18:48,915 --> 00:18:50,849 Next time, me, you, library. 319 00:18:50,950 --> 00:18:53,077 - Not even close. - Come on, guys. Guys, come on. 320 00:18:53,820 --> 00:18:55,754 - You are... - l'm the winner! 321 00:18:55,822 --> 00:18:59,087 l didn't need you to stick up for me, okay? l could've handled that myself. 322 00:18:59,159 --> 00:19:02,856 Hey, don't flatter yourself. lt's the partner's code. l had no choice. 323 00:19:02,962 --> 00:19:04,190 Move. 324 00:19:13,206 --> 00:19:16,369 -9:15, let's have a great day, everybody! - Cut the shit! 325 00:19:23,382 --> 00:19:24,576 Good morning. 326 00:19:25,451 --> 00:19:28,750 We've got shots fired. 509 East 10th Street. 327 00:19:28,821 --> 00:19:30,755 There are large amounts of cocaine on the scene. 328 00:19:30,823 --> 00:19:31,949 Try to stay out of trouble, boys. 329 00:19:32,057 --> 00:19:33,718 There's no chance you'd wanna go on that call, right? 330 00:19:33,792 --> 00:19:35,623 No chance. Too busy. 331 00:19:35,895 --> 00:19:40,264 All right, ladies. Starting to get the picture? We're about to lock shit down. 332 00:19:40,332 --> 00:19:42,323 - That's right. - You girls stay here and get your type on. 333 00:19:42,434 --> 00:19:44,334 Go get them, guys. Lot of energy, lot of focus. 334 00:19:44,470 --> 00:19:45,562 Shut up! 335 00:19:45,638 --> 00:19:47,902 Allen, could l see you in the hallway for a second? 336 00:19:47,973 --> 00:19:49,440 l... l'm super busy right now, Terry. 337 00:19:49,508 --> 00:19:51,408 No, no, no, l know. This'll be real quick. 338 00:19:51,477 --> 00:19:53,342 lt's about the construction permits you were talking about. 339 00:19:53,445 --> 00:19:55,436 - The scaffolding violations? - This is our thing, yeah. 340 00:19:57,082 --> 00:19:58,640 So, what do you got? 341 00:19:58,751 --> 00:20:01,242 l got this! l'll put one right in your neck. 342 00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:02,412 What are you doing? 343 00:20:02,488 --> 00:20:05,184 Let's go. We're going to that call. 344 00:20:05,291 --> 00:20:06,849 - What is this? - Shut up. 345 00:20:06,959 --> 00:20:09,291 We're going to the car, and we're going after this case. 346 00:20:09,361 --> 00:20:10,794 - You're not gonna shoot me. - l won't? 347 00:20:10,863 --> 00:20:12,330 - No. - l shot Jeter. 348 00:20:12,431 --> 00:20:14,592 - That was an accident. - Was it? 349 00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:16,191 - Now move. - Okay. 350 00:20:16,936 --> 00:20:18,267 Hey. 351 00:20:18,337 --> 00:20:21,534 Does anybody see this? He's got a gun on me. 352 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:23,437 l'm being kidnapped. 353 00:20:23,509 --> 00:20:26,603 Really, we're in a police station and no one is interested in this? 354 00:20:26,812 --> 00:20:29,212 - So, then what happened? - What do you think happened? 355 00:20:29,315 --> 00:20:32,682 l woke up, l took the belt off my neck, and l got in my car, and l got out of there. 356 00:20:32,785 --> 00:20:34,309 Talk about a wild weekend, right? 357 00:20:34,386 --> 00:20:37,685 l thought l was gonna have to shoot my way out. 358 00:20:37,790 --> 00:20:39,951 What are you gonna do, though, you know? Bar mitzvahs. 359 00:20:42,328 --> 00:20:44,193 What the hell is this? 360 00:20:44,296 --> 00:20:46,992 lt's my car. lt's a Prius. 361 00:20:47,066 --> 00:20:50,729 l feel like we're literally driving around in a vagina. 362 00:20:50,836 --> 00:20:53,669 Detective Hoitz and Gamble are on that 518 on East 10th. 363 00:20:53,739 --> 00:20:55,832 Negatory, Martin and Fosse, two minutes out. 364 00:20:55,908 --> 00:20:57,637 We'll just see who's there first. 365 00:20:57,710 --> 00:21:00,406 You stay out of our crime scene! You hear me? 366 00:21:00,579 --> 00:21:02,137 Go, go, go! 367 00:21:02,548 --> 00:21:05,244 You feel that, Allen? That tingling in your balls? 368 00:21:05,351 --> 00:21:07,216 Big metal butterflies fluttering around in your stomach? 369 00:21:07,319 --> 00:21:08,911 Are you sure you don't have testicular cancer? 370 00:21:09,021 --> 00:21:11,046 l got something to get you going. 371 00:21:13,892 --> 00:21:16,053 Let's go do some damage! 372 00:21:17,496 --> 00:21:18,724 Nope. 373 00:21:21,066 --> 00:21:22,226 What the hell is that? 374 00:21:22,568 --> 00:21:24,695 LRB. Little River Band. 375 00:21:25,037 --> 00:21:27,369 This music makes me feel like l'm going shopping for a training bra. 376 00:21:27,706 --> 00:21:30,174 You know what? We go with no music, okay? 377 00:21:30,242 --> 00:21:31,368 - Fine. - Say bye. 378 00:21:31,443 --> 00:21:32,569 No, no, no, don't say bye... 379 00:21:32,678 --> 00:21:34,373 You just signed your own death warrant, Hoitz! 380 00:21:34,446 --> 00:21:37,677 Allen, punch that accelerator or l will shoot you in the foot! 381 00:21:37,750 --> 00:21:39,183 America! 382 00:21:39,518 --> 00:21:41,782 Allen! Allen, hit the brake! 383 00:21:42,788 --> 00:21:45,552 Seriously, slow the car down! We're approaching the crime scene! 384 00:21:45,624 --> 00:21:46,716 Terry, l'm coming in. 385 00:21:46,792 --> 00:21:48,623 You're gonna smash right through the tape! Allen! 386 00:21:48,961 --> 00:21:50,394 Dude! What... 387 00:21:55,601 --> 00:21:57,728 That's a lot of cocaine. 388 00:21:58,704 --> 00:22:01,696 Did you yell ''America'' when you hit the accelerator? 389 00:22:01,774 --> 00:22:03,571 Nope. No. No. 390 00:22:04,276 --> 00:22:06,608 l've never actually put my foot all the way down 391 00:22:07,413 --> 00:22:10,610 to the ground with the accelerator like that. 392 00:22:11,784 --> 00:22:14,082 lt got me slightly aroused. 393 00:22:16,622 --> 00:22:18,214 Here we go. 394 00:22:20,292 --> 00:22:23,750 Way to put your stamp on the crime scene, guys. 395 00:22:23,829 --> 00:22:26,263 - Prius, huh? - Yep, yep. 396 00:22:26,331 --> 00:22:27,593 Good mileage? 397 00:22:27,666 --> 00:22:29,065 - Outstanding. - Yeah. 398 00:22:29,134 --> 00:22:31,728 Did this come with a dental dam? 399 00:22:32,438 --> 00:22:34,338 - No. - Get it? 400 00:22:35,841 --> 00:22:37,809 My Suburban shit one of these last night. 401 00:22:37,910 --> 00:22:39,502 l didn't know they put tampons on wheels. 402 00:22:41,113 --> 00:22:42,273 We've had our fun, huh? 403 00:22:42,347 --> 00:22:45,316 Looks like Scarface sneezed on your car. 404 00:22:46,085 --> 00:22:47,177 All right, everybody! 405 00:22:47,286 --> 00:22:50,312 l'm gonna need you all to back up now. We're taking over. 406 00:22:50,422 --> 00:22:52,822 ''At the crime scene, LOL.' ' 407 00:22:52,925 --> 00:22:54,620 - Good tweet, good tweet. - Yeah, thanks. 408 00:22:54,993 --> 00:22:58,759 America has always been defined by its excess. 409 00:22:59,965 --> 00:23:02,433 The Grand Canyon, professional sports contracts. 410 00:23:02,501 --> 00:23:04,935 Wendy's Baconator, extra bacon. 411 00:23:05,003 --> 00:23:08,871 l myself have 18 Lamborghinis 412 00:23:10,042 --> 00:23:11,976 and a Subaru station wagon. 413 00:23:12,311 --> 00:23:15,178 And it's because of this excess that l have flourished. 414 00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:18,875 l implore you, please, do not stop profiting. 415 00:23:18,984 --> 00:23:22,681 Live for excess. lt's the American way. 416 00:23:29,228 --> 00:23:30,525 Hello. 417 00:23:31,230 --> 00:23:34,393 Mr. Ershon? l believe this call's for you. 418 00:23:37,836 --> 00:23:38,962 Sir David. 419 00:23:39,037 --> 00:23:42,666 David. You're not returning my calls, so l'd like you to meet Roger Wesley. 420 00:23:42,741 --> 00:23:44,368 - G'day, mate. - Hey. 421 00:23:44,810 --> 00:23:47,074 Roger and his team are gonna babysit you because l don't trust you, 422 00:23:47,179 --> 00:23:48,441 because l think you're going to take off. 423 00:23:49,214 --> 00:23:52,012 Pamela, this is ridiculous. l'm not going anywhere. 424 00:23:52,084 --> 00:23:54,518 David, listen, the Lendl quarterlies come out on the 26th. 425 00:23:54,586 --> 00:23:57,419 You have until then to give me my money. l'm not reporting any losses, David. 426 00:23:57,523 --> 00:23:59,354 l have zeroed in on a new investor. 427 00:23:59,424 --> 00:24:02,450 Well, then, you get their money, make it disappear, and then pay us back. 428 00:24:02,561 --> 00:24:05,860 Yes, yes, l'll tell him he doesn't need to keep watching me. 429 00:24:05,931 --> 00:24:08,422 - David! - Okay, sweetheart, bye-bye. 430 00:24:08,534 --> 00:24:12,903 Yeah. She overreacted. She's a woman. So, you're good to go. 431 00:24:13,372 --> 00:24:14,430 Heard everything, mate. 432 00:24:14,706 --> 00:24:15,798 Ladies and gentlemen, 433 00:24:15,908 --> 00:24:20,402 guess who gave me the secrets to making my first billion dollars. 434 00:24:22,314 --> 00:24:23,781 That man there. 435 00:24:24,583 --> 00:24:26,574 Go! Go! 436 00:24:26,885 --> 00:24:28,716 - Side! - Step aside, please. 437 00:24:29,488 --> 00:24:31,251 You don't think l'm a real cop, do you? 438 00:24:31,323 --> 00:24:33,587 No, l don't. l've said that directly to your face numerous times. 439 00:24:33,659 --> 00:24:34,785 l was really honest about that. 440 00:24:34,893 --> 00:24:37,384 l'm working on a huge case, all right? 441 00:24:37,462 --> 00:24:39,589 Property owner with seven buildings under construction. 442 00:24:39,665 --> 00:24:42,793 He hasn't applied for a single scaffolding permit. 443 00:24:42,901 --> 00:24:46,837 Now, according to Ask Jeeves, this perp is at the Plaza Hotel speaking right now. 444 00:24:46,939 --> 00:24:50,636 - That's your big case? Scaffolding permits? - Yeah. 445 00:24:51,276 --> 00:24:53,972 Guess what? You're coming with me. 446 00:24:54,746 --> 00:24:56,646 lt's a wooden gun. 447 00:24:59,117 --> 00:25:00,982 That hurts, man! 448 00:25:03,255 --> 00:25:07,123 l've always got Little River Band loaded up here. l've got six disks in here. 449 00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:11,123 Claude, meet me outside, at the back of the service entrance. 450 00:25:11,196 --> 00:25:13,664 l'm flying Air Singapore. 451 00:25:13,765 --> 00:25:15,460 - Hey, Douglas. How's the wife? - She died. 452 00:25:15,534 --> 00:25:16,626 Attaboy! 453 00:25:16,702 --> 00:25:18,670 l'll be there in two minutes exactly. 454 00:25:18,837 --> 00:25:22,432 Another thing l hate about you? You always pay in exact change. 455 00:25:22,507 --> 00:25:24,805 You're just mad because l have a nice change purse. 456 00:25:24,876 --> 00:25:26,002 Why do you even care? 457 00:25:26,111 --> 00:25:29,046 How can l help it? You know what? You know what's worse? 458 00:25:29,147 --> 00:25:31,172 The way you fart. Even your farts, they're not manly. 459 00:25:31,283 --> 00:25:32,375 You're being ridiculous. 460 00:25:32,484 --> 00:25:35,044 They sound like a baby blowing out the candles on a birthday cake. 461 00:25:35,153 --> 00:25:36,450 - What? - Like a little... 462 00:25:36,521 --> 00:25:38,386 - You know what bugs me about you? - What? 463 00:25:38,490 --> 00:25:39,821 l'm pretty sure you've never voted. 464 00:25:39,891 --> 00:25:43,224 No, l vote. Sports radio, AM 880. Play of the week. 465 00:25:43,328 --> 00:25:45,660 You're like a child in a leather jacket. That's what you're like. 466 00:25:45,731 --> 00:25:46,823 Get out of the way, man! 467 00:25:46,898 --> 00:25:48,798 Wait. Are you David Ershon? 468 00:25:49,368 --> 00:25:52,166 Yeah, well, it's Sir David Ershon, but l don't bother with the... 469 00:25:52,237 --> 00:25:55,502 Anyway, little bit of a rush, gentlemen, if you don't mind. Thank you. 470 00:25:55,574 --> 00:25:58,839 - Excuse me, but you're under arrest, okay? - What? 471 00:25:58,910 --> 00:26:03,847 You have the right to remain silent. Anything you do or say can be used... 472 00:26:03,915 --> 00:26:06,042 - What's the next part? - As a floatation device. 473 00:26:06,151 --> 00:26:07,641 As a floatation device. 474 00:26:07,719 --> 00:26:11,246 You know what? That's very funny. l have never Miranda-ed anyone before. 475 00:26:11,356 --> 00:26:13,153 - Really? - Are you guys for real? 476 00:26:13,225 --> 00:26:14,317 Am l being punk'd? 477 00:26:15,460 --> 00:26:16,757 Detective Allen Gamble. 478 00:26:16,828 --> 00:26:19,763 We are in a cocaine-covered car, and we are bringing in a perp. 479 00:26:19,865 --> 00:26:22,663 - One David Ershon. -175 pounds. 480 00:26:22,734 --> 00:26:24,759 - Thank you. 175 pounds. - Shut up, man, shut up! 481 00:26:25,003 --> 00:26:28,769 Martin and Fosse are probably on Studio B talking to Shepard Smith right now. 482 00:26:28,874 --> 00:26:31,707 We arrest this jerkoff for a scaffolding permit? 483 00:26:31,777 --> 00:26:34,007 Wait, wait, wait, what am l being arrested for? 484 00:26:34,079 --> 00:26:35,944 For scaffolding permit violation... 485 00:26:44,956 --> 00:26:46,856 - l got my insurance card. Somewhere. - Easy, mate. 486 00:26:46,925 --> 00:26:49,291 - What the hell? You ran right into us! - Stand over there. 487 00:26:49,861 --> 00:26:50,919 Wood? 488 00:26:51,463 --> 00:26:52,589 What the... 489 00:26:52,698 --> 00:26:54,461 - Couldn't see the car. lt's big enough, mate. - What? 490 00:26:54,566 --> 00:26:56,193 Do not let these men take me. 491 00:26:57,969 --> 00:26:59,061 Hi. 492 00:27:00,205 --> 00:27:01,695 Why's she looking at you like that? 493 00:27:01,773 --> 00:27:03,263 That's my car! 494 00:27:03,375 --> 00:27:07,106 Hey, hey, hey! We didn't exchange insurance information! 495 00:27:07,479 --> 00:27:09,037 Hey! Excuse me! 496 00:27:09,915 --> 00:27:12,315 Why did they take our shoes? 497 00:27:12,417 --> 00:27:15,818 - What the hell just happened? - Where's my iPhone? 498 00:27:16,988 --> 00:27:19,115 l think we've walked 30 blocks, man. 499 00:27:19,224 --> 00:27:24,252 l don't get why we can't just call the office and have a squad car come pick us up. 500 00:27:24,329 --> 00:27:26,820 No. They took our shoes, our guns, and our car. 501 00:27:26,932 --> 00:27:28,559 There's no way that's going out on the radio. 502 00:27:28,934 --> 00:27:32,062 Look, if we're gonna do this together, there's some issues we need to settle, okay? 503 00:27:32,137 --> 00:27:35,732 l mean, you said l had a weak chin. You said the way l pee is feminine. 504 00:27:35,807 --> 00:27:37,001 How do you think that makes me feel? 505 00:27:37,109 --> 00:27:42,172 l mean, that list you have, you put a lot of thought in. lt's weird. 506 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,510 l hear you. 507 00:27:44,616 --> 00:27:49,349 Let's clean the slate right now. Fresh start. 508 00:27:49,454 --> 00:27:52,082 All right. Fresh start. 509 00:27:53,792 --> 00:27:57,353 Maybe we should call ourselves the Febreze Brothers, 510 00:27:57,462 --> 00:27:59,020 'cause it's feeling so fresh right now. 511 00:28:00,599 --> 00:28:01,657 Right? 512 00:28:01,967 --> 00:28:04,834 Let's do another fresh start, 'cause l just wanted to punch you in the face. 513 00:28:05,036 --> 00:28:07,698 Fine, fresh start. 514 00:28:07,806 --> 00:28:09,603 lt's the last one. 515 00:28:09,674 --> 00:28:11,608 l have to be able to express myself and say things, you know. 516 00:28:14,546 --> 00:28:17,310 - Okay, folks! Everybody, listen up! - Listen up! 517 00:28:17,382 --> 00:28:19,316 Got a high profile kidnapping. 518 00:28:19,518 --> 00:28:22,851 David Ershon, wealthy banker, multinational team. 519 00:28:22,954 --> 00:28:24,979 Maybe a sleeper cell, but it's too early to tell. 520 00:28:25,056 --> 00:28:29,493 Hey, Bilbo Baggins. Where are your shoes? 'Cause your feet are black. 521 00:28:29,561 --> 00:28:31,552 Who cares? lt's not important, okay? 522 00:28:31,663 --> 00:28:34,188 Hoitz, Gamble, Captain. Not good. 523 00:28:36,134 --> 00:28:37,795 - Bye, guys. - Bye-bye. 524 00:28:37,869 --> 00:28:38,961 Come on. 525 00:28:39,404 --> 00:28:42,567 Guys, this is Don Beaman, the attorney for Mr. Ershon. 526 00:28:42,674 --> 00:28:44,801 Roger Wesley, head of his private security. 527 00:28:44,876 --> 00:28:46,810 - Hey, how are you? You son of a bitch! - Hey, hey, hey! 528 00:28:46,878 --> 00:28:48,641 Hey, Terry! Take it easy! 529 00:28:48,713 --> 00:28:50,681 - That's the guy who took our guns, Captain. - And my shoes! 530 00:28:50,749 --> 00:28:53,809 Wait a minute, wait a minute. Did you identify yourselves as police officers? 531 00:28:53,885 --> 00:28:54,977 What is this? 532 00:28:55,053 --> 00:28:57,385 - Allen, tell me. Did you? - No, we did not. 533 00:28:57,489 --> 00:29:01,482 Sorry, gentlemen. We thought you were abducting Mr. Ershon. 534 00:29:02,027 --> 00:29:03,187 lt's only protocol. 535 00:29:03,395 --> 00:29:08,025 Mr. Ershon has agreed to correct this scaffolding situation. The case is closed. 536 00:29:08,099 --> 00:29:10,590 l've taken care of all necessary paperwork. 537 00:29:10,702 --> 00:29:12,795 And you fellas, at this point, should just be glad that 538 00:29:12,904 --> 00:29:16,396 Mr. Ershon is not pressing charges for excessive use of force. 539 00:29:16,475 --> 00:29:17,942 - Thank you, Captain. - You bet. 540 00:29:18,477 --> 00:29:20,069 Australian? 541 00:29:20,145 --> 00:29:21,578 Special Forces, right? 542 00:29:21,947 --> 00:29:24,472 Best watch your step, Detective. 543 00:29:24,583 --> 00:29:27,279 There are three things l love in this world. 544 00:29:27,385 --> 00:29:28,443 Kylie Minogue, 545 00:29:30,055 --> 00:29:32,819 small dimples just above a woman's buttocks... 546 00:29:32,924 --> 00:29:34,289 Beautiful features. 547 00:29:34,392 --> 00:29:37,122 ...and the fear in a man's eye who knows l'm about to hurt him. 548 00:29:37,229 --> 00:29:41,757 Hey! Shake your dicks. This pissing contest is over. 549 00:29:41,833 --> 00:29:43,164 Come on, man. 550 00:29:45,737 --> 00:29:48,831 All right, look, they returned your shoes. 551 00:29:49,274 --> 00:29:53,506 And they returned your weapons. Here you go, Terry. 552 00:29:55,113 --> 00:29:57,809 Allen, someone was nice enough to put linseed oil on it, 553 00:29:57,916 --> 00:30:00,749 some kind of stain on that, dark walnut or something. 554 00:30:00,819 --> 00:30:03,413 You might wanna think about dropping them a thank you note. 555 00:30:03,488 --> 00:30:04,614 Okay. 556 00:30:04,689 --> 00:30:05,815 You're mad at us, huh, Gene? 557 00:30:05,924 --> 00:30:09,621 First off, don't call me Gene. l'm your captain. 558 00:30:09,694 --> 00:30:12,288 Guys, do you remember the ''Be Smart'' speech? 559 00:30:12,364 --> 00:30:13,490 - Sure. - All right. 560 00:30:13,598 --> 00:30:16,192 Well, what did you do? What'd you do about it? 561 00:30:16,301 --> 00:30:19,099 The opposite. We were not smart, Captain Gene. 562 00:30:19,170 --> 00:30:21,138 lt's just ''Captain.' ' 563 00:30:21,206 --> 00:30:24,266 Just ''Captain.' ' lt's not ''Captain Gene.' ' l don't have a kiddie show. 564 00:30:24,342 --> 00:30:25,969 That sounds creepy, ''Captain Gene.' ' 565 00:30:26,378 --> 00:30:30,439 Police mistakenly arrest investment banker, David Ershon. 566 00:30:30,515 --> 00:30:33,450 Was he the victim of financial profiling? 567 00:30:33,518 --> 00:30:38,217 Financial profiling? That's crazy. He broke the law and we arrested him. 568 00:30:38,323 --> 00:30:42,384 That wasn't a security team. He said, ''Don't let these people take me.' ' 569 00:30:42,494 --> 00:30:44,894 l mean, when you hear hooves, you think horses, not zebras. 570 00:30:46,197 --> 00:30:47,994 What about donkeys or deer? 571 00:30:48,066 --> 00:30:50,034 They have hooves. What about bovine creatures? 572 00:30:52,037 --> 00:30:54,164 Were you just thinking to yourself, ''Fresh start''? 573 00:30:54,239 --> 00:30:57,208 - Yeah. - Yeah. l could see it. 574 00:30:57,309 --> 00:30:59,368 Listen, why don't we just go over to my place? 575 00:30:59,477 --> 00:31:00,808 We'll talk the case down. 576 00:31:00,879 --> 00:31:02,904 We can have a little dinner. You can meet Sheila. 577 00:31:03,014 --> 00:31:05,710 Two cops talking down a case while eating food, all right? 578 00:31:05,817 --> 00:31:06,977 - lt's not dinner. - Fine. 579 00:31:07,052 --> 00:31:08,849 And let me apologize in advance, okay, 580 00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:11,320 in case my wife acts like a world-class bitch. 581 00:31:11,389 --> 00:31:16,588 She's a big old broad, and she likes to wield it. 582 00:31:17,262 --> 00:31:22,598 Okay, so l put together a little bio, complete with pictures of Mr. David Ershon. 583 00:31:22,701 --> 00:31:26,102 l used Adobe Premiere. l like to do a little weekend editing. 584 00:31:26,204 --> 00:31:29,765 l recently just cut three minutes out of Goodfellas. 585 00:31:29,874 --> 00:31:33,105 David Ershon is currently the CEO of Ershon Consortium. 586 00:31:33,211 --> 00:31:34,269 Who's that talking? 587 00:31:34,379 --> 00:31:36,904 lt's the Frontline Narration App. lt's only 99 cents. 588 00:31:37,015 --> 00:31:41,008 Ershon Consortium, current financial investments exceed $70 billion. 589 00:31:41,086 --> 00:31:44,112 His largest clients include Schering-Plough and Lendl Global. 590 00:31:44,222 --> 00:31:46,918 Lendl Global has those TV ads where l can't figure out what they do. 591 00:31:47,025 --> 00:31:50,085 Yeah, oil, media, health care, you've probably heard their jingle. 592 00:31:50,195 --> 00:31:53,130 Lendl Global, we're in everything 593 00:31:53,231 --> 00:31:56,064 David Ershon is often found in the company of Judge Scalia... 594 00:31:56,134 --> 00:31:58,466 - Yeah. - ... and the lead singer of Maroon 5. 595 00:31:58,570 --> 00:32:00,401 l mean, this guy could be connected to drug cartels, 596 00:32:00,472 --> 00:32:03,305 black market organ sales, human trafficking, all of it. 597 00:32:03,408 --> 00:32:05,035 How do you get that from anything l just said? 598 00:32:05,110 --> 00:32:06,907 Hey, guys! Soup's on. 599 00:32:06,978 --> 00:32:08,377 What do you mean? 600 00:32:10,482 --> 00:32:11,574 Hi. 601 00:32:11,650 --> 00:32:13,242 - Hi. - You must be Terry. 602 00:32:13,318 --> 00:32:16,549 l'm sorry l've been hiding, honey, but this dinner was tricky. 603 00:32:17,922 --> 00:32:20,652 - Who are you? - l'm Dr. Sheila Gamble, his wife. 604 00:32:20,959 --> 00:32:23,587 - Come on, seriously. Who is that? - His old lady. 605 00:32:23,662 --> 00:32:26,153 - Sweetie, it's a workstation. - Got it. 606 00:32:26,264 --> 00:32:29,791 And you come in here, dressed like a hobo, it's distracting. 607 00:32:29,901 --> 00:32:31,835 l know you're working. l'm so sorry. 608 00:32:31,936 --> 00:32:33,927 - Come on, seriously. - Come on, what? 609 00:32:34,005 --> 00:32:35,233 Who is that? 610 00:32:35,306 --> 00:32:37,331 That's the old... That's the old ball and chain. 611 00:32:39,678 --> 00:32:41,236 Get over here. 612 00:32:41,312 --> 00:32:42,939 - Not... Not right now. - Okay. 613 00:32:43,014 --> 00:32:45,005 Look, they're not all first-round picks, okay? 614 00:32:45,417 --> 00:32:46,816 Come on, are you gonna tell me who that is? 615 00:32:47,686 --> 00:32:51,178 - Are you really Allen's wife? - l know. 616 00:32:51,289 --> 00:32:54,747 People are shocked because he's Episcopalian and l'm Catholic, 617 00:32:55,427 --> 00:32:56,860 but somehow it works. 618 00:32:57,595 --> 00:33:00,155 - Are you gonna change? - l already did. 619 00:33:00,365 --> 00:33:02,492 lt's no big deal. You look really, really nice. 620 00:33:02,600 --> 00:33:06,661 Terry, you don't have to be polite, okay? She looks kind of shitty. 621 00:33:06,771 --> 00:33:08,102 Don't speak to her like that, Allen. 622 00:33:08,173 --> 00:33:12,439 Look, if l put that in my Cosmo Fashion App, you'd probably get a D-. 623 00:33:13,010 --> 00:33:14,807 Allen and his apps. He loves them. 624 00:33:14,879 --> 00:33:18,337 You know he's designed three of his own? One of them... Can l tell him? 625 00:33:18,983 --> 00:33:20,883 One of them, you can take a picture of anybody's face, 626 00:33:20,985 --> 00:33:23,783 and it'll tell you what the back of his head looks like. 627 00:33:24,021 --> 00:33:25,352 - Faceback. - Faceback. 628 00:33:25,456 --> 00:33:27,481 Got some horrible reviews coming out of the gate. 629 00:33:27,858 --> 00:33:29,018 - lt's gonna hit. - lt's gonna catch. 630 00:33:29,126 --> 00:33:31,151 Why are you with Allen? 631 00:33:31,228 --> 00:33:35,130 l mean, that's not what l meant. l meant, how did you guys meet? 632 00:33:35,199 --> 00:33:37,667 lt's a really typical ''how we met'' story, Terry. 633 00:33:38,235 --> 00:33:39,429 You're gonna be bored by it. 634 00:33:39,503 --> 00:33:43,496 l was a dancer for the Knicks while finishing my residency at Columbia Hospital. 635 00:33:43,608 --> 00:33:45,838 Allen came into the ER with poison ivy on his rectum. 636 00:33:45,943 --> 00:33:47,001 Yes. 637 00:33:47,111 --> 00:33:49,739 Needless to say, l fell for him immediately. 638 00:33:50,147 --> 00:33:54,379 We immediately spent the next three days at the La Quinta lnn, 639 00:33:55,119 --> 00:33:57,451 - and, to be honest, we didn't speak. - Three days 640 00:33:57,521 --> 00:34:00,081 of not communicating once verbally. 641 00:34:00,391 --> 00:34:02,450 We had actually, without knowing it, 642 00:34:02,526 --> 00:34:07,793 developed a language of eye flutters and non-verbal gestures. 643 00:34:08,032 --> 00:34:10,694 You know, Terry, it was just this primal connection. 644 00:34:11,135 --> 00:34:16,129 After those three days of non-verbal communication and a whole lot of loving, 645 00:34:16,374 --> 00:34:19,673 l had to go to a specialist to get my hips realigned. 646 00:34:20,077 --> 00:34:23,706 Similar to operating on a German shepherd 647 00:34:24,448 --> 00:34:28,009 - when they have hip dysplasia. - Very painful. 648 00:34:28,352 --> 00:34:32,379 lt's funny, it's like a scene from that one movie, always forget the name of it. 649 00:34:32,490 --> 00:34:33,650 - With Meg Ryan. - Yes. 650 00:34:33,724 --> 00:34:36,693 l don't remember a movie where Meg Ryan meets a guy with poison ivy up his ass. 651 00:34:36,794 --> 00:34:39,194 - l'll think of it. l'll think of it. - Okay. 652 00:34:39,296 --> 00:34:40,991 So, what about you, Terry? Do you have a girl? 653 00:34:41,065 --> 00:34:43,056 l did, yeah. 654 00:34:43,167 --> 00:34:45,635 We were supposed to get married, but she backed out. lt's complicated. 655 00:34:45,703 --> 00:34:48,171 - Terry shot Derek Jeter. - Shut up, Allen. This was before. 656 00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:49,501 That's okay. 657 00:34:49,573 --> 00:34:51,541 She's Got Mail. That's the name of the movie. 658 00:34:51,642 --> 00:34:53,576 That's it! Honey! 659 00:34:53,678 --> 00:34:54,736 - With Tom Hanks? - Right. 660 00:34:54,845 --> 00:34:55,903 - And Meg Ryan. - Meg Ryan. 661 00:34:56,013 --> 00:34:57,071 He didn't have poison ivy up his ass. 662 00:34:57,181 --> 00:34:58,478 - Yes, he did. - Yes, he did. Yeah. 663 00:34:58,549 --> 00:34:59,811 Way up there. 664 00:35:00,317 --> 00:35:02,911 Well, Terry, can't thank you enough for coming by. What a... 665 00:35:03,020 --> 00:35:04,647 What a wonderful, lovely evening. Thank you. 666 00:35:04,722 --> 00:35:08,351 - lt was so, so nice meeting you, Terry. - lt was my pleasure. Thank you. 667 00:35:08,426 --> 00:35:12,920 And remember, all l ask of you is, you don't let him get hurt, Terry. 668 00:35:13,030 --> 00:35:15,396 - She tells me that every day before l leave. - Yep, l do. 669 00:35:15,733 --> 00:35:18,566 l come downstairs and l make him his fresh-cut strawberries, 670 00:35:18,669 --> 00:35:21,433 and l say, ''Listen, my little sugar balls, whatever you do today, 671 00:35:21,539 --> 00:35:22,836 ''you just don't get hurt.' ' 672 00:35:22,907 --> 00:35:24,238 Yeah. Every morning. 673 00:35:24,675 --> 00:35:28,167 And then l show him my breasts, and l say, ''These are waiting for you 674 00:35:28,245 --> 00:35:29,371 - ''when you get back home.' ' - Right. 675 00:35:29,447 --> 00:35:32,348 You know, Terry, they're not the biggest breasts he's ever seen, 676 00:35:32,416 --> 00:35:34,850 - but, man, are they perky. - Not by a long shot. 677 00:35:34,919 --> 00:35:37,581 - And they are firm, and they are yours. - You're a nice lady. 678 00:35:39,390 --> 00:35:40,584 Thank you for coming. 679 00:35:40,958 --> 00:35:44,917 Detectives Hoitz and Gamble? Detectives Hoitz and Gamble? Over. 680 00:35:45,029 --> 00:35:46,087 Go for Hoitz. 681 00:35:46,197 --> 00:35:47,721 - We found your red Prius. - Great. 682 00:35:47,798 --> 00:35:49,891 lt was trying to vote for Ralph Nader. 683 00:35:49,967 --> 00:35:52,197 - Come on. - Okay, sugar balls, listen up. 684 00:35:52,269 --> 00:35:53,566 There's gonna be fingerprints on that car. 685 00:35:53,637 --> 00:35:55,969 Tomorrow, we're gonna run those fingerprints through the system. 686 00:35:56,073 --> 00:35:59,736 And if we get a hit, this case is gonna heat up faster than a junkie's spoon. 687 00:35:59,810 --> 00:36:02,142 You do one thing when you wake up tomorrow, bring it. 688 00:36:02,246 --> 00:36:03,304 - Okay. - Thank you, Sheila. 689 00:36:03,414 --> 00:36:04,472 He'll bring it. 690 00:36:04,582 --> 00:36:06,209 - Good night! - Good night. 691 00:36:06,283 --> 00:36:07,614 Thank you, Sheila. 692 00:36:07,952 --> 00:36:10,978 - Bye, Terry! - Bye, Sheila! l'll never forget tonight. 693 00:36:11,088 --> 00:36:12,885 - Bye, Terry! - All right, Allen, whatever. Go inside. 694 00:36:12,957 --> 00:36:14,049 Bye, Sheila! 695 00:36:14,125 --> 00:36:15,615 - Night! - See you... See you, Terry! 696 00:36:16,093 --> 00:36:17,583 Bye, Sheila. 697 00:36:21,565 --> 00:36:24,159 l don't know if he heard me. Bye, Terry! 698 00:36:24,268 --> 00:36:25,826 Bye, Sheila! 699 00:36:29,273 --> 00:36:33,676 Well, here she is. They left her under an overpass for the night. 700 00:36:33,778 --> 00:36:35,439 You find anything? 701 00:36:35,513 --> 00:36:38,277 Yeah. We found a lot of stuff. 702 00:36:38,349 --> 00:36:40,317 From bodily fluid and hair samples, 703 00:36:40,417 --> 00:36:43,443 we determined that a bunch of old, homeless dudes had an orgy in the car. 704 00:36:43,521 --> 00:36:45,785 - Oh, God. - Yeah. 705 00:36:45,856 --> 00:36:47,687 You know what that's called when they do that in there? 706 00:36:47,792 --> 00:36:49,259 That's called a soup kitchen. 707 00:36:49,326 --> 00:36:50,918 lt's pretty rough stuff. 708 00:36:50,995 --> 00:36:54,487 Not long after that, a mama raccoon came along 709 00:36:54,598 --> 00:36:55,997 and gave birth on the floor. 710 00:36:56,834 --> 00:36:58,426 Placenta blew out all over the back window there. 711 00:36:59,570 --> 00:37:02,198 Yeah, and then to top it all off, some joker comes along 712 00:37:02,473 --> 00:37:05,567 takes himself a nifty little dump in the driver's seat. 713 00:37:05,910 --> 00:37:07,639 l think he knew you guys were cops, 714 00:37:08,045 --> 00:37:10,513 because this is what l would call a spite shit. 715 00:37:10,981 --> 00:37:12,414 You were able to determine all of that 716 00:37:12,483 --> 00:37:14,314 - from the hair and fluid samples? - Oh, yeah. 717 00:37:14,718 --> 00:37:16,583 What about fingerprints? You find any fingerprints? 718 00:37:16,654 --> 00:37:18,679 - Nope, couldn't get a one. - Found a cell phone. 719 00:37:19,156 --> 00:37:20,350 Yeah, that's mine. 720 00:37:20,491 --> 00:37:21,924 Any signs of a struggle or spent shells? 721 00:37:22,526 --> 00:37:26,724 No. Believe me, everybody that was in on this orgy was more than willing. 722 00:37:26,797 --> 00:37:28,890 ln fact, they even left you a note here. 723 00:37:28,966 --> 00:37:32,663 ''Thanks for the F-shack. Love, Dirty Mike and the boys.' ' 724 00:37:32,803 --> 00:37:33,827 Here's something we found. 725 00:37:33,904 --> 00:37:36,498 We found about a dozen unscratched lottery tickets. 726 00:37:36,674 --> 00:37:39,734 No fingerprints or nothing. Check that out. 727 00:37:39,910 --> 00:37:43,243 Yeah, it's a real shame, you know. l got myself a Prius. lt's a hell of a machine. 728 00:37:44,081 --> 00:37:47,050 lt's my first brand-new car. l've never owned a new car. 729 00:37:47,117 --> 00:37:48,880 Found a deer vagina. 730 00:37:49,753 --> 00:37:51,948 - What? - Thought it was human lips at first. 731 00:37:52,056 --> 00:37:54,524 Then we took a closer look. lt was definitely a deer vagina. 732 00:37:56,861 --> 00:37:57,725 Not even a free ticket. 733 00:37:58,963 --> 00:38:00,191 What are we gonna do? 734 00:38:00,297 --> 00:38:03,357 We got no fingerprints, a bunch of losing lottery tickets. 735 00:38:03,601 --> 00:38:06,069 Look at this, there's a two-minute phone call made after we were jumped. 736 00:38:06,637 --> 00:38:08,605 - They used your phone? - They ghost dialed. 737 00:38:08,672 --> 00:38:09,832 Someone probably sat on it. 738 00:38:09,940 --> 00:38:12,670 lt could have recorded some of their conversation when Ershon got grabbed. 739 00:38:12,776 --> 00:38:14,107 We gotta hear the other side of that call. 740 00:38:15,279 --> 00:38:16,644 Nope, no, it's nothing. 741 00:38:16,713 --> 00:38:18,977 - Nothing? lt's the only lead we have. - lt's nothing. lt's nothing. 742 00:38:19,049 --> 00:38:20,448 Why did you just get super jumpy? 743 00:38:21,552 --> 00:38:22,644 What? 744 00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:24,687 lt's an ex-girlfriend, okay? 745 00:38:24,788 --> 00:38:26,517 What's the matter? What happened with you guys? 746 00:38:26,623 --> 00:38:28,454 She was just a bit of a handful, that's it. 747 00:38:33,463 --> 00:38:35,397 Allen, it's the only lead we have. 748 00:38:35,499 --> 00:38:37,831 We either go with this or we walk away from this case right now. 749 00:38:38,402 --> 00:38:40,302 Fine. Let's go see her. 750 00:38:53,217 --> 00:38:54,479 Hello, Christinith. 751 00:38:54,551 --> 00:38:56,143 Hello, Allen. 752 00:38:58,555 --> 00:39:01,319 - That's my partner, Terry. - Hi, Telly. 753 00:39:01,758 --> 00:39:04,921 - Holy shit. Dude. - Just relax, relax. 754 00:39:05,696 --> 00:39:10,099 l waited for you in Tower Records for four hours. 755 00:39:11,034 --> 00:39:13,002 That was 13 years ago. 756 00:39:16,073 --> 00:39:21,010 Arnold Palmer alert. Arnold Palmer alert. Who wants some Arnie Palmies? 757 00:39:22,346 --> 00:39:23,938 Sweetie, this one has the vodky, right here. 758 00:39:24,047 --> 00:39:27,210 - Hal, just place it down, please. - All righty. 759 00:39:28,051 --> 00:39:29,279 Okay. 760 00:39:33,423 --> 00:39:38,554 l did things in bed with you that l haven't done with anyone since. 761 00:39:38,629 --> 00:39:39,926 No. 762 00:39:40,030 --> 00:39:42,794 - Christinith, your husband, it's awkward. - Oh, no, he knows all of this. 763 00:39:42,899 --> 00:39:45,390 - You're a lucky dog. - lt's true. 764 00:39:48,438 --> 00:39:50,303 Christine, this is a lovely house. 765 00:39:50,407 --> 00:39:53,433 lt's Christinith. Are you stupid, or are you deaf? 766 00:39:53,644 --> 00:39:56,238 Christinith, you idiot! 767 00:39:56,580 --> 00:40:00,949 You come to our house, you get my wife's name right! 768 00:40:01,385 --> 00:40:02,750 - What? - Christinith! 769 00:40:02,819 --> 00:40:05,583 Look, we really appreciate the hospitality. 770 00:40:05,922 --> 00:40:08,083 We'd just love to get the message off your cell phone. 771 00:40:08,158 --> 00:40:12,117 We believe it might give us information regarding a kidnapping. 772 00:40:14,931 --> 00:40:18,701 Okay. Why don't you come to the kitchen, and l will let you listen to it 773 00:40:18,736 --> 00:40:21,226 and everyone else stay here. 774 00:40:21,638 --> 00:40:24,266 - Okay, sweetie. - Come on. 775 00:40:28,144 --> 00:40:30,510 - There's my phone. - Great, thank you for... 776 00:40:33,917 --> 00:40:37,353 l hate you, you son of a bitch! 777 00:40:37,420 --> 00:40:40,821 - You're so strong. - l'm stronger than you will ever know! 778 00:40:40,890 --> 00:40:43,916 l hate you! l hate you! 779 00:40:44,027 --> 00:40:47,519 You're so adorable. Look at your face. Look at your face. 780 00:40:47,597 --> 00:40:51,533 You go, ''l wuv you.' ' Say it. ''l wuv you, Cwistinith.' ' 781 00:40:57,340 --> 00:41:01,777 You probably think because of the beard that l'm really hairy. 782 00:41:01,878 --> 00:41:03,846 But l'm not. 783 00:41:05,248 --> 00:41:06,715 Shaved. 784 00:41:07,217 --> 00:41:08,946 - Allen! - He's fine. 785 00:41:09,919 --> 00:41:11,113 Question. 786 00:41:12,155 --> 00:41:13,315 What would you rather be, 787 00:41:14,691 --> 00:41:17,159 a bear or a dog? 788 00:41:17,327 --> 00:41:20,262 - l don't care. - l wanna be 789 00:41:21,631 --> 00:41:24,191 a bear dog. Half dog, half bear. 790 00:41:24,868 --> 00:41:27,234 'Cause that way, l could live in the house 791 00:41:27,504 --> 00:41:30,473 but l still get to make a doodie out in the woods. 792 00:41:31,274 --> 00:41:32,502 Allen! 793 00:41:36,779 --> 00:41:38,269 Allen! Allen! 794 00:41:38,348 --> 00:41:41,579 - This is police evidence. Terry! Let's go! - Hey! 795 00:41:41,651 --> 00:41:44,176 You get back here and you make love to my wife! 796 00:41:44,287 --> 00:41:45,811 Allen! Allen! 797 00:41:46,656 --> 00:41:50,183 l don't get it, man. l just do not get it. 798 00:41:50,293 --> 00:41:52,523 l mean, that girl Christinith was seriously hot. 799 00:41:52,629 --> 00:41:54,256 Your wife is crazy hot. 800 00:41:54,330 --> 00:41:57,026 l mean, even that Brazilian security chick, she threw you a ''Do me'' vibe. 801 00:41:57,600 --> 00:41:59,067 What is it with you and hot ladies? 802 00:41:59,135 --> 00:42:02,502 First off, my wife is cute, but she's not hot. 803 00:42:02,605 --> 00:42:06,666 Dude, you're insane. Your wife is scalding hot. 804 00:42:06,776 --> 00:42:09,142 - You wanna listen to this message or not? - Yeah, whatever. 805 00:42:09,245 --> 00:42:10,212 You have one job, mate. 806 00:42:10,913 --> 00:42:12,904 Find a sucker to invest with you 807 00:42:12,982 --> 00:42:14,950 so you can pay my boss back the money you lost. 808 00:42:15,017 --> 00:42:16,245 And l don't care who. 809 00:42:16,319 --> 00:42:18,651 Right. l actually think l found a sucker... 810 00:42:18,754 --> 00:42:21,188 - He's talking to Ershon. - ... to invest $32 billion. 811 00:42:21,290 --> 00:42:22,848 Who's got $32 billion to rob? 812 00:42:22,959 --> 00:42:25,189 Once l get the money, l'll falsify the records 813 00:42:25,328 --> 00:42:28,092 to show their massive losses and then repay your employer. 814 00:42:28,164 --> 00:42:31,827 Now, since you're following me, l need to go to 2300 Park Avenue, 815 00:42:31,934 --> 00:42:33,492 and after that... 816 00:42:33,603 --> 00:42:35,366 l told you it wasn't a security team. 817 00:42:35,671 --> 00:42:38,834 - He was being abducted. - Obviously, but what kind... Holy... 818 00:42:38,941 --> 00:42:40,465 Nobody leaves our house without making love to my wife! 819 00:42:40,543 --> 00:42:41,703 - ls that him? - Yeah! 820 00:42:41,811 --> 00:42:43,608 Oh, my God, they came out of nowhere! 821 00:42:43,679 --> 00:42:45,510 - Holy shit! - They chased us 20 miles. 822 00:42:45,615 --> 00:42:47,810 - You come back here! You get back here! - Allen! 823 00:42:55,558 --> 00:42:59,153 2300 Park Avenue. lt's the offices of the lottery. 824 00:43:00,296 --> 00:43:01,991 Holy shit, the lottery tickets we found. 825 00:43:02,365 --> 00:43:04,799 Ershon is using the lottery money to cover his losses. 826 00:43:04,867 --> 00:43:07,700 $32 billion. That's the state's money. 827 00:43:07,803 --> 00:43:09,998 Well, what do we tell Mauch? A guy lost some money. 828 00:43:10,072 --> 00:43:13,564 We have a scratchy cell phone message and an address. lt's still half a case. 829 00:43:13,676 --> 00:43:17,635 There's gotta be some sort of paper trail. lf we can find that, if we can track it, 830 00:43:17,713 --> 00:43:18,907 then we can go to Mauch. 831 00:43:19,682 --> 00:43:23,675 So, l did some more research on Ershon's accounting firm, 832 00:43:23,753 --> 00:43:25,482 and l found some pretty interesting stuff. 833 00:43:25,555 --> 00:43:28,718 lt turns out that Gretchel and Dawson has... 834 00:43:30,159 --> 00:43:31,854 Hold on, l'm up. 835 00:43:33,162 --> 00:43:36,222 l gave my love to Erin 836 00:43:37,199 --> 00:43:40,862 She promised to be true 837 00:43:41,404 --> 00:43:45,397 l went to war to come back 838 00:43:45,508 --> 00:43:49,444 And find five British soldiers 839 00:43:49,545 --> 00:43:52,742 Had their way with her 840 00:43:52,915 --> 00:43:57,284 lt was consensual 841 00:43:58,020 --> 00:43:59,078 Done? 842 00:43:59,188 --> 00:44:02,123 Gretchel and Dawson Accounting Firm in Fair Lawn, New Jersey 843 00:44:02,224 --> 00:44:05,284 has only one client, David Ershon. 844 00:44:05,394 --> 00:44:07,919 Pretty rinky-dink operation for a guy like that. 845 00:44:08,030 --> 00:44:10,726 Looks like we're going to Jersey to visit an accounting firm. 846 00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:13,564 That's a shitty day. 847 00:44:14,804 --> 00:44:18,865 And all their fathers were hanged 848 00:44:18,941 --> 00:44:22,399 And the children all got pink eye 849 00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:31,318 While their Harry Potter books were burned 850 00:44:36,959 --> 00:44:39,393 Do you have fun singing those songs? They're really depressing. 851 00:44:39,462 --> 00:44:41,896 l do. They're full of rich history. 852 00:44:43,099 --> 00:44:45,090 Damn it, l'm late. l was supposed to go meet my lady. 853 00:44:45,167 --> 00:44:47,567 l thought you said you guys split up. 854 00:44:47,637 --> 00:44:50,162 Let's just keep our thing about work, okay? 855 00:44:50,272 --> 00:44:51,830 All right. Goodbye, buddy. 856 00:44:51,941 --> 00:44:53,932 Hey, get off me, man. 857 00:45:12,528 --> 00:45:15,258 What the hell are you doing? 858 00:45:15,331 --> 00:45:17,925 l'm dancing, Terry. What the hell are you doing here? 859 00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:20,161 l love you, Francine. 860 00:45:20,269 --> 00:45:23,500 lf you were with me, you wouldn't be here in this strip club, shaking it for dollar bills! 861 00:45:23,606 --> 00:45:28,634 This is a ballet studio, Terry. Okay? These poles are horizontal. 862 00:45:28,711 --> 00:45:30,770 He loves you very much, Francine. 863 00:45:30,846 --> 00:45:33,314 - Who is this guy? - What are you doing here, Allen? 864 00:45:33,382 --> 00:45:35,009 lt's the code. l'm your partner. 865 00:45:35,217 --> 00:45:38,277 l'm here to support a friend and a work colleague. 866 00:45:38,354 --> 00:45:39,844 Francine, is this guy bothering you? 867 00:45:39,955 --> 00:45:42,822 Who's this, your new boyfriend? Great. You got a new boyfriend. 868 00:45:42,892 --> 00:45:46,328 He is my dance partner, Terry. Okay? 869 00:45:46,395 --> 00:45:48,192 l know that this is a big surprise, 870 00:45:48,297 --> 00:45:51,130 but there are other things in the world besides being a cop. Okay? 871 00:45:51,801 --> 00:45:54,668 Now, if you will excuse me, l'm gonna dance. 872 00:45:54,737 --> 00:45:56,534 What, you don't think l can do this shit? 873 00:46:13,055 --> 00:46:15,250 That was surprisingly good, Terry. 874 00:46:15,558 --> 00:46:18,254 - l love you, Francine. - You don't know what love is. 875 00:46:18,360 --> 00:46:20,294 He loves you very much, Francine! 876 00:46:20,396 --> 00:46:22,296 l heard it when he said it. Thank you. 877 00:46:22,398 --> 00:46:24,593 You know what you're doing to me? You're killing me inside. 878 00:46:24,700 --> 00:46:25,792 And don't eyeball me, man! 879 00:46:25,901 --> 00:46:27,869 You're running around with this crack-dealing drug addict? 880 00:46:27,937 --> 00:46:29,029 Terry! 881 00:46:29,105 --> 00:46:30,800 He does not approve of your behavior! 882 00:46:30,906 --> 00:46:32,874 Can you please go? 883 00:46:32,942 --> 00:46:35,240 And you, too, creepy guy standing in the door? 884 00:46:39,381 --> 00:46:40,575 Let's go, Allen. 885 00:46:41,050 --> 00:46:43,610 l think we all experienced our own ballet today. 886 00:46:43,953 --> 00:46:45,750 The ballet of emotion and feelings. 887 00:46:46,222 --> 00:46:47,780 You're kind of making things worse. 888 00:46:57,399 --> 00:47:00,232 - You okay? - Yeah, l'm fine. 889 00:47:01,670 --> 00:47:04,161 Hey, l didn't know you could dance. 890 00:47:05,107 --> 00:47:07,575 We used to do those dance moves to make fun of guys when we were kids, 891 00:47:07,643 --> 00:47:09,008 show them how queer they were, okay? 892 00:47:10,946 --> 00:47:13,938 - You learned to dance like that sarcastically? - Yeah, l guess. 893 00:47:14,016 --> 00:47:17,577 Stay out of my personal life, okay? The kid flies private. 894 00:47:17,653 --> 00:47:20,816 Stay focused on the case, man. l'll see you in Jersey tomorrow. 895 00:47:21,257 --> 00:47:22,815 All right, Terry. 896 00:47:23,359 --> 00:47:26,954 Hey, that was liberating for me. l don't know how it felt for you. 897 00:47:49,484 --> 00:47:52,851 Here, check this out. Article from six months ago. 898 00:47:52,955 --> 00:47:54,513 Talking about how the lottery is looking 899 00:47:54,623 --> 00:47:57,023 to invest their $30-billion fund more aggressively. 900 00:47:57,726 --> 00:47:58,852 So he's dealing drugs? 901 00:47:59,227 --> 00:48:03,027 No, it's not drugs. This isn't Miami Vice. 902 00:48:06,134 --> 00:48:07,965 Look, l'm sorry. l just... 903 00:48:08,670 --> 00:48:13,369 l am in a bit of a state today. Sheila and l got into it last night. 904 00:48:13,909 --> 00:48:15,274 What happened? 905 00:48:17,179 --> 00:48:19,977 She was interested in taking this class at The Learning Annex, right? 906 00:48:20,615 --> 00:48:22,549 Called ''The Art of Oral Sex''? 907 00:48:22,818 --> 00:48:25,514 You know, we just don't have it in the budget right now. 908 00:48:26,121 --> 00:48:28,089 lt's always about her. 909 00:48:28,490 --> 00:48:30,458 Yeah, that's... That's messed up. 910 00:48:32,194 --> 00:48:33,354 Hey, l got you a gift. 911 00:48:34,196 --> 00:48:37,962 l just saw something, and l thought of you, and so, l don't want it to be weird. 912 00:48:38,033 --> 00:48:39,159 l just wanted to be nice. 913 00:48:39,267 --> 00:48:40,598 Of course it's weird. 914 00:48:40,669 --> 00:48:42,500 lt's a grown man giving another man a present. 915 00:48:44,172 --> 00:48:46,504 There you go. Open it up. 916 00:48:47,109 --> 00:48:49,009 lt's okay, you're welcome. 917 00:48:49,544 --> 00:48:51,512 l like to do things like that. 918 00:48:51,646 --> 00:48:53,705 Take a look what it says. 919 00:49:02,557 --> 00:49:05,025 You know, because we're both in law enforcement. 920 00:49:05,127 --> 00:49:06,685 We both like women. 921 00:49:06,795 --> 00:49:09,787 But l got a weird sense of humor. l'm a sick puppy. 922 00:49:10,132 --> 00:49:12,293 l can't look at it. lt makes me laugh so hard. 923 00:49:12,367 --> 00:49:13,664 Me, too. 924 00:49:17,072 --> 00:49:20,235 Real nice. You know, it's all class. 925 00:49:22,477 --> 00:49:23,876 - Okay. - Don't do that shit any more. 926 00:49:23,979 --> 00:49:25,344 Yeah, believe me, l won't. 927 00:49:25,981 --> 00:49:28,279 Do you understand what's so funny about it, though? 928 00:49:29,851 --> 00:49:33,446 'Cause it's the FBl, right? lt has the same logo, the same shield. 929 00:49:33,522 --> 00:49:36,355 And at first glance, you're like, it's just a mug that says ''FBl.' ' 930 00:49:36,925 --> 00:49:41,589 But then at second glance, you're like, ''Female Body lnspector''? 931 00:49:41,663 --> 00:49:43,824 Get out of town. This is outrageous... 932 00:49:43,932 --> 00:49:45,194 Shut up! 933 00:49:57,712 --> 00:49:59,942 l'm gonna climb over that anger wall of yours 934 00:50:00,015 --> 00:50:01,107 one of these days, 935 00:50:01,183 --> 00:50:03,344 and it's gonna be glorious. 936 00:50:06,888 --> 00:50:09,550 Shouldn't we tell Mauch that we're going to check this place out? 937 00:50:09,658 --> 00:50:10,926 For what? We're just going to check it out. 938 00:50:10,961 --> 00:50:12,791 l know, but it's procedure. 939 00:50:13,862 --> 00:50:15,989 Terry answers to no one. 940 00:50:16,665 --> 00:50:18,826 l do what l do. 941 00:50:19,868 --> 00:50:22,336 What accounting firm is closed at 11:00 a.m. on a Tuesday? 942 00:50:22,404 --> 00:50:23,666 This is a shithole. 943 00:50:31,346 --> 00:50:32,404 l love bombs. 944 00:50:32,514 --> 00:50:35,677 l can't hear! l can't hear! 945 00:50:37,152 --> 00:50:39,143 There's blood blisters on my hands! 946 00:50:39,221 --> 00:50:40,313 Oh, my God! 947 00:50:40,388 --> 00:50:42,686 How do they walk away in movies without flinching 948 00:50:42,757 --> 00:50:44,486 when it explodes behind them? 949 00:50:44,559 --> 00:50:47,824 There's no way! l call bullshit on that! 950 00:50:48,163 --> 00:50:51,496 When they flew the Millennium Falcon outside of the Death Star, 951 00:50:51,566 --> 00:50:55,559 and it was followed by the explosion, that was bullshit! 952 00:50:55,670 --> 00:50:58,935 Don't you dare badmouth Star Wars! That was all accurate! 953 00:50:59,040 --> 00:51:01,008 l need an MRl. 954 00:51:01,076 --> 00:51:05,376 l need an MRl! l've got soft tissue damage. 955 00:51:05,847 --> 00:51:07,872 There's no way l don't have soft tissue damage. 956 00:51:07,949 --> 00:51:09,041 Please stop. 957 00:51:09,117 --> 00:51:10,846 l just wanna go somewhere and breastfeed right now! 958 00:51:15,023 --> 00:51:19,392 Fire Department said it was a gas leak, but no way. That was timed. 959 00:51:19,461 --> 00:51:21,258 They didn't wanna kill us, but they wanted to scare us. 960 00:51:21,363 --> 00:51:23,854 Yeah, well, they succeeded, okay? 961 00:51:23,932 --> 00:51:26,560 l'm tired of this. All right? 962 00:51:26,635 --> 00:51:29,195 l'm tired of explosions and people pointing guns at me. 963 00:51:29,271 --> 00:51:31,398 l wanna go back to my desk. 964 00:51:31,473 --> 00:51:34,965 Guess what? Life gets loud sometimes and messes with your ears. 965 00:51:35,076 --> 00:51:37,544 You can't escape it by hiding at your desk for your whole life. 966 00:51:37,612 --> 00:51:40,376 You know what? Yes, you can. l've done it for years, okay? 967 00:51:40,448 --> 00:51:43,383 There's no explosions at my desk. 968 00:51:43,451 --> 00:51:48,388 There's no explosions at my home with my plain wife, in my plain house. 969 00:51:50,725 --> 00:51:52,454 What are you afraid of, man? 970 00:51:53,595 --> 00:51:58,089 l'm your partner. You can tell me. What the hell are you hiding from? 971 00:51:58,833 --> 00:52:01,199 l was a sophomore in college. 972 00:52:02,604 --> 00:52:06,665 The university l went to decided they needed to raise tuition. 973 00:52:07,809 --> 00:52:13,645 A classmate of mine, Brenda, in an effort to raise money and stay in school, 974 00:52:13,715 --> 00:52:15,683 came up with a nifty plan 975 00:52:15,784 --> 00:52:18,218 where she thought she'd date guys and charge them money. 976 00:52:18,386 --> 00:52:19,978 l go on dates all the time, 977 00:52:20,055 --> 00:52:22,182 with a whole bunch of, you know, boys and stuff. 978 00:52:22,290 --> 00:52:25,623 And l kind of need somebody to help me out, like, you know, my partner in crime. 979 00:52:26,194 --> 00:52:28,458 Yeah, l could make a schedule. 980 00:52:28,530 --> 00:52:30,122 Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what l was thinking. 981 00:52:30,198 --> 00:52:32,723 - Provide transportation services. - Yeah, yeah. 982 00:52:32,834 --> 00:52:34,961 - lt's gonna be a good time. - Thanks so much for asking me. 983 00:52:35,036 --> 00:52:37,504 She said she needed my help to make sure that the dates went okay 984 00:52:37,572 --> 00:52:41,030 and that the guys paid her. She said she'd give me a percentage. 985 00:52:41,142 --> 00:52:44,407 - Oh, my God. You were a pimp. - What? God, no. 986 00:52:44,512 --> 00:52:46,571 No, l was just trying to help a friend. 987 00:52:46,681 --> 00:52:49,241 We started making a lot of money. 988 00:52:50,251 --> 00:52:53,152 And wouldn't you know it, some of Brenda's girlfriends 989 00:52:53,221 --> 00:52:55,917 decided they wanted to be a part of it. 990 00:52:56,024 --> 00:52:58,686 Pretty soon, there were about 14 ladies that l was protecting 991 00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,387 while they gave me money. 992 00:53:00,495 --> 00:53:02,019 That's called a stable of whores. 993 00:53:02,931 --> 00:53:07,868 We decided l shouldn't use my real name. So we came up with the name ''Gator.' ' 994 00:53:08,103 --> 00:53:09,570 l'm telling you, you were a pimp. 995 00:53:09,671 --> 00:53:12,265 No! Are you even listening to the story? 996 00:53:15,076 --> 00:53:17,169 Anyway, one day, l wake up and l look in the mirror, 997 00:53:17,245 --> 00:53:19,509 and l don't like what l see. 998 00:53:20,749 --> 00:53:24,276 l mean, l had gotten out of control, and l didn't even realize it. 999 00:53:25,086 --> 00:53:27,418 You can't have a conscience in the pimp game. 1000 00:53:28,189 --> 00:53:29,918 One night, two of my favorite girls, 1001 00:53:30,025 --> 00:53:32,220 Candy and Jolene, said, ''We gotta take you in,'' 1002 00:53:32,293 --> 00:53:34,591 and they dropped me off at the emergency room. 1003 00:53:34,696 --> 00:53:36,596 That's where l met Sheila. l was a mess. 1004 00:53:36,698 --> 00:53:41,897 l made a promise to myself and to her that l would never get out of control again. 1005 00:53:42,737 --> 00:53:44,102 So, as soon as l graduated from college, 1006 00:53:44,205 --> 00:53:47,106 l became an accountant for the police department. 1007 00:53:47,742 --> 00:53:50,438 The most stable job l could think of. 1008 00:53:52,047 --> 00:53:54,447 An accountant for law and order. 1009 00:53:56,751 --> 00:54:00,812 l just don't wanna ever feel out of control like that ever again. 1010 00:54:00,922 --> 00:54:03,618 Don't worry. l got your back. 1011 00:54:03,725 --> 00:54:06,125 Now l say we go get in Ershon's grill and see if he cracks. 1012 00:54:06,227 --> 00:54:09,993 - l'm tired of all this tippy-toeing around. - Okay. 1013 00:54:10,331 --> 00:54:13,061 You can either walk the plank or take your panties off. 1014 00:54:13,134 --> 00:54:14,761 The choice is yours. 1015 00:54:14,836 --> 00:54:19,102 - l want to take my panties off. - You've made a wise choice, you have. 1016 00:54:19,174 --> 00:54:23,975 Mr. Ershon, Detective Gamble and the officer who shot Derek Jeter are here. 1017 00:54:24,512 --> 00:54:25,774 Gentlemen, please. 1018 00:54:25,847 --> 00:54:29,146 - Remember us, hotshot? - Of course l do. Please, sit. 1019 00:54:29,250 --> 00:54:30,911 There she blows. 1020 00:54:33,321 --> 00:54:36,586 Two of those Russian waters, please. No lime wedges, just cucumber. 1021 00:54:36,658 --> 00:54:39,786 Guess where we just came from? An explosion at your accounting office. 1022 00:54:40,128 --> 00:54:42,358 Yes, that awful gas leak. 1023 00:54:42,464 --> 00:54:46,366 Gas leak? The only gas leak is the one coming out of your mouth right now. 1024 00:54:46,468 --> 00:54:51,496 l just thank God no one was hurt or injured in a bad way. 1025 00:54:51,606 --> 00:54:54,302 l absolutely abhor death. 1026 00:54:54,542 --> 00:54:58,000 Hey, Andrew Lloyd Webber. The jig is up, okay? 1027 00:54:58,146 --> 00:54:59,977 We know that wasn't your security team that grabbed you. 1028 00:55:00,048 --> 00:55:02,380 And we know you're targeting a big fish to cover losses. 1029 00:55:02,484 --> 00:55:04,816 You talk or l beat you so it don't show no bruises. 1030 00:55:05,186 --> 00:55:07,950 God, this water is good. Terry, have you tried the water? 1031 00:55:08,022 --> 00:55:09,512 Shut up, Allen. 1032 00:55:09,624 --> 00:55:12,889 l assure you, l have no idea what you're talking about. 1033 00:55:12,994 --> 00:55:16,896 l understand there was a bit of a mix-up with the whole scaffolding business. 1034 00:55:16,998 --> 00:55:22,402 The cucumber accents the water in such a way that... 1035 00:55:23,571 --> 00:55:28,304 Perhaps by way of apology, l can offer you my personal courtside seats 1036 00:55:28,376 --> 00:55:32,540 for the Knicks game, with access to the Ambassador Club. 1037 00:55:34,916 --> 00:55:40,047 Come on, Knicks! Come on! l got Knicks' fever and it's catching! 1038 00:55:41,389 --> 00:55:45,416 Hey. This feels weird sitting here. lt feels like it's a bribe. 1039 00:55:45,527 --> 00:55:50,055 lt is a bribe. Son-of-a-bitch, l saw courtside and l went blind. 1040 00:55:50,165 --> 00:55:51,427 Come on. 1041 00:55:52,267 --> 00:55:53,598 Call me! 1042 00:55:55,069 --> 00:55:56,866 - Excuse me. - That was a trick. 1043 00:55:56,938 --> 00:55:58,337 No more. 1044 00:55:58,406 --> 00:56:03,776 Gentlemen, you have a choice. Mamma Mia or Jersey Boys. 1045 00:56:07,115 --> 00:56:10,175 Fantastic! You're so unbelievable! 1046 00:56:14,689 --> 00:56:16,589 Damn it. He did it again. 1047 00:56:17,559 --> 00:56:19,857 - Excuse me. - No more tickets. 1048 00:56:19,928 --> 00:56:21,862 Mr. Ershon, l tried to keep them in the waiting room. 1049 00:56:21,930 --> 00:56:25,195 That's okay, Susan. Two Glacier waters with Mediterranean limes. 1050 00:56:25,266 --> 00:56:27,131 No, no, no. No more water. We're not here for that. 1051 00:56:27,235 --> 00:56:29,260 No, l was very much looking forward to having a water. 1052 00:56:29,370 --> 00:56:33,807 - How great is Jersey Boys? - lt's not great. lt's fantastic! 1053 00:56:33,908 --> 00:56:37,241 You totally undersold it. The pageantry, the costumes. 1054 00:56:37,312 --> 00:56:38,939 Wow, what a musical. 1055 00:56:39,047 --> 00:56:40,912 Hey. Get over here. 1056 00:56:42,050 --> 00:56:43,210 - What's wrong with you? - What? 1057 00:56:43,284 --> 00:56:44,774 That's not what we're here for. 1058 00:56:45,720 --> 00:56:47,779 We're gonna do good cop, bad cop. Okay? 1059 00:56:48,089 --> 00:56:51,115 lt's the oldest game in the book for a reason, it works. 1060 00:56:51,226 --> 00:56:52,557 l come strong, then you come in. 1061 00:56:52,627 --> 00:56:53,719 - You got it? - Yeah. 1062 00:56:53,795 --> 00:56:56,457 - l come strong, then you come in. - Right. Got it. 1063 00:56:56,564 --> 00:56:58,464 Now you listen to me, you piece of shit. 1064 00:56:58,733 --> 00:57:01,293 lt's just you and me, and l'm gonna rip you apart! 1065 00:57:01,402 --> 00:57:05,600 How did you cover your losses up? What drug cartel are you working with now? 1066 00:57:05,673 --> 00:57:09,609 - Okay, l'll talk to you, you're reasonable! - No, no, look at me! 1067 00:57:09,677 --> 00:57:12,145 You wanna talk to me? You wanna talk to me? 1068 00:57:12,247 --> 00:57:15,739 Allen, what are you doing? What are you doing? Allen! 1069 00:57:16,584 --> 00:57:18,814 l'm gonna make you eat a plate of human shit! 1070 00:57:19,487 --> 00:57:21,284 Get away from me! 1071 00:57:25,994 --> 00:57:27,461 Where is he? 1072 00:57:29,497 --> 00:57:32,091 Look, l'm really sorry about that. 1073 00:57:32,934 --> 00:57:35,459 l saw how aggressive you were being, and l thought, 1074 00:57:35,536 --> 00:57:39,165 ''Wow, l gotta go even bigger than that, since we're doing bad cop, bad cop.' ' 1075 00:57:39,274 --> 00:57:44,337 What? No, l said, ''Good cop, bad cop.' ' l'm the bad cop, you're the good cop. 1076 00:57:44,445 --> 00:57:48,848 Okay, then there it is. That's it. l thought you said, ''Bad cop, bad cop.' ' 1077 00:57:49,183 --> 00:57:52,619 Well, while you were going crazy, look what l snagged from his desk. 1078 00:57:52,687 --> 00:57:54,780 - Think it's his phone sheet. - Nice. 1079 00:57:55,123 --> 00:57:56,818 Seven calls to the lottery office. 1080 00:57:57,158 --> 00:57:58,682 That could be the evidence we need for Mauch. 1081 00:58:01,462 --> 00:58:04,329 - Get back. Colombian drug lords. - Where are you getting that from? 1082 00:58:06,134 --> 00:58:07,328 Jesus! 1083 00:58:16,144 --> 00:58:18,578 Can you imagine where you'd be in your career if you hadn't shot Jeter? 1084 00:58:26,387 --> 00:58:29,720 - We call this in, right? - Looks like we got all the evidence we need. 1085 00:58:29,824 --> 00:58:31,883 l'm sorry, my butterfly. 1086 00:58:33,261 --> 00:58:36,196 We'll load them up, send them back to go. 1087 00:58:44,939 --> 00:58:48,238 - Holy shit. - What? 1088 00:58:48,343 --> 00:58:51,039 What do you mean, what? Where are we? 1089 00:58:52,413 --> 00:58:53,846 We're in the high desert. 1090 00:58:53,915 --> 00:58:57,681 They took my shoes again, man! What the hell is it with taking shoes? 1091 00:58:57,752 --> 00:58:59,276 - They took your wooden gun? - Yeah. 1092 00:59:05,860 --> 00:59:08,090 - Hello? - Hello, Gene? l mean, Captain. 1093 00:59:08,196 --> 00:59:09,595 Captain, it's Allen Gamble. 1094 00:59:09,697 --> 00:59:11,528 Yeah, yeah. Where are you? What's going on? 1095 00:59:11,599 --> 00:59:13,897 Captain, it's a long story, but l'm just gonna cut to the chase. 1096 00:59:13,968 --> 00:59:15,936 We are in Las Vegas, all right? 1097 00:59:16,037 --> 00:59:19,404 We were kidnapped, put on a freight train, and shipped out here. 1098 00:59:19,474 --> 00:59:21,908 Let me just stop you right there. Don't bullshit me. 1099 00:59:21,976 --> 00:59:23,375 Captain, l am being straight with you. 1100 00:59:23,444 --> 00:59:25,776 Look, we think something's going on, okay? 1101 00:59:25,880 --> 00:59:28,747 We think Ershon is targeting the lottery to cover his losses. 1102 00:59:28,816 --> 00:59:34,254 Wait. How many times did l explicitly say to you, ''Lay off Ershon''? 1103 00:59:34,756 --> 00:59:36,053 Terry, Captain wants to know 1104 00:59:36,124 --> 00:59:38,058 how many times has he asked us to lay off of Ershon. 1105 00:59:38,126 --> 00:59:39,218 Twice. 1106 00:59:40,061 --> 00:59:41,824 Twice. Terry says twice. l agree. 1107 00:59:41,929 --> 00:59:43,988 l'm hanging up. l'm done. 1108 00:59:48,269 --> 00:59:52,797 l gotta tell you, l started getting a hand for that, a taste for that Pai Gow. 1109 00:59:53,508 --> 00:59:58,104 Martin and Fosse, super cops, in three, two... 1110 00:59:58,179 --> 01:00:04,084 So, we busted that junkie. Got back 74 thou in diamonds. 74 thou. 1111 01:00:05,186 --> 01:00:06,619 Solved the Castien case. 1112 01:00:06,687 --> 01:00:09,485 $74,000? That's all they took? 1113 01:00:09,590 --> 01:00:11,820 There's millions of dollars of diamonds in that place. 1114 01:00:11,926 --> 01:00:14,087 How about this, Gamble? How about you shut your face? 1115 01:00:14,162 --> 01:00:15,754 All right? Just shut it. 1116 01:00:15,830 --> 01:00:17,457 Hoitz, Gamble, Captain's looking for you. 1117 01:00:20,435 --> 01:00:22,665 l know it's off the subject, but is Kevlar copyrighted? 1118 01:00:22,770 --> 01:00:24,032 - Captain? - Yeah. 1119 01:00:24,138 --> 01:00:26,629 - ls it a bad time? - No, come on. Come on. 1120 01:00:27,008 --> 01:00:28,839 - Not me, right? - Yeah, and you. 1121 01:00:28,943 --> 01:00:32,640 Fellows, l'm sure you're familiar with the venerable DA Radford. 1122 01:00:32,713 --> 01:00:34,374 He wanted to come down and pay us a visit. 1123 01:00:34,482 --> 01:00:35,710 Hello, gentlemen. 1124 01:00:35,817 --> 01:00:36,943 - Hello, sir. - Hey. 1125 01:00:37,018 --> 01:00:40,385 - You know, l was talking to Gene here. - He prefers ''Captain.' ' 1126 01:00:40,488 --> 01:00:43,980 Yes, l was talking to Gene here, and, you know, it's funny. 1127 01:00:44,292 --> 01:00:46,522 l don't know what you two have been up to, 1128 01:00:46,627 --> 01:00:49,994 but l've been getting calls from people l don't ever get calls from. 1129 01:00:50,064 --> 01:00:52,999 ln 40 years of enforcing the law, l've learned one thing. 1130 01:00:53,634 --> 01:00:55,329 When that happens, stop. 1131 01:00:56,904 --> 01:00:59,998 - Gene, how's the family? - Good, good, Louis, thanks for asking. 1132 01:01:00,074 --> 01:01:02,065 - My son's bisexual, so... - Tremendous. 1133 01:01:04,879 --> 01:01:06,403 Gentlemen, do we understand each other? 1134 01:01:07,715 --> 01:01:09,876 - Cut the crap! - Will do. 1135 01:01:14,255 --> 01:01:15,688 Guy never comes down here. 1136 01:01:15,756 --> 01:01:18,589 Twenty years, l think l've seen that guy in this building one time. 1137 01:01:18,693 --> 01:01:21,856 - He's a heavyweight cat, that guy. - He was sitting right here. 1138 01:01:22,263 --> 01:01:25,699 Yeah. l think you missed the point. Anyway, look. 1139 01:01:25,766 --> 01:01:29,202 Blue and white found your firearms down by the Hudson River. Here you go, Terry. 1140 01:01:30,872 --> 01:01:32,362 You know what? 1141 01:01:33,040 --> 01:01:35,008 l'm gonna hang on to the wooden gun. 1142 01:01:35,076 --> 01:01:36,941 - To give me back my real gun? - No. 1143 01:01:37,044 --> 01:01:39,103 'Cause l'm gonna give you this. 1144 01:01:39,847 --> 01:01:43,010 lt's a rape whistle. You blow that if you run into any trouble 1145 01:01:43,618 --> 01:01:46,178 and someone with an actual gun will come and help you out. 1146 01:01:47,555 --> 01:01:52,219 We were abducted, Captain! This shit is real! Ershon's dirty. He's targeting the lottery! 1147 01:01:52,293 --> 01:01:57,196 Next, l want you guys to hand in all the evidence you think you have to the SEC. 1148 01:01:57,265 --> 01:01:59,096 The financial district's under their jurisdiction. 1149 01:01:59,200 --> 01:02:01,668 Don't you get it? This case is talking to us! 1150 01:02:01,736 --> 01:02:04,864 l'm a peacock, Captain! You gotta let me fly on this one! 1151 01:02:04,939 --> 01:02:07,840 You know what, Terry? Let's just settle this. Peacocks don't fly. 1152 01:02:07,909 --> 01:02:11,367 - They fly, they fly a little bit. - Yeah, about as much as a penguin. 1153 01:02:11,445 --> 01:02:15,074 One more thing, do me a favor, don't go chasing waterfalls. 1154 01:02:15,783 --> 01:02:18,343 Was that accidental, or were you trying to quote TLC on purpose? 1155 01:02:19,186 --> 01:02:20,244 l don't even understand the reference. 1156 01:02:20,788 --> 01:02:22,915 - You don't understand what you said? - l don't know what that is. 1157 01:02:23,024 --> 01:02:24,457 Get out. Go. 1158 01:02:35,202 --> 01:02:37,432 How did they get that story? 1159 01:02:38,973 --> 01:02:41,942 l'm tired of being treated like a jerk for trying to do the right thing. 1160 01:02:42,043 --> 01:02:43,101 Hey, guys. 1161 01:02:43,477 --> 01:02:47,379 There's a proxy vote for a big reinvestment of the pension coming up, 1162 01:02:47,448 --> 01:02:50,315 - so if you just wanna come by the old... - Damn it, Bob! 1163 01:02:50,418 --> 01:02:51,476 Let me ask you something. 1164 01:02:51,586 --> 01:02:53,986 What do you even do around here besides interrupt people? 1165 01:02:54,688 --> 01:02:57,088 Well, l serve as treasurer to the union. 1166 01:02:57,157 --> 01:02:59,990 l make a wicked pot of decaf. 1167 01:03:00,094 --> 01:03:03,325 Exactly! You're a worthless piece of shit! 1168 01:03:05,265 --> 01:03:08,792 Probably right, Terry. That's why l feel so sad all the time. 1169 01:03:09,703 --> 01:03:11,500 l'm gonna go for a walk. 1170 01:03:11,605 --> 01:03:12,867 - Bob! - Say something. 1171 01:03:12,973 --> 01:03:14,838 Come on! Bob! 1172 01:03:14,942 --> 01:03:17,843 l didn't mean it, all right? l'm upset. 1173 01:03:35,662 --> 01:03:40,759 Actually, we don't do that here. This is an installation art piece. 1174 01:03:41,135 --> 01:03:43,228 - This coffee table? - Yes. We don't put drinks on it. 1175 01:03:47,007 --> 01:03:49,669 - Five hundred thousand? - He can read! Congratulations. 1176 01:03:50,144 --> 01:03:52,305 - What? - l'm sorry, are you in the right place? 1177 01:03:52,379 --> 01:03:54,677 Or not? l'm... 1178 01:03:55,883 --> 01:03:57,077 - Terry. - Does he... Okay. 1179 01:03:57,151 --> 01:04:00,416 - Well... - Sorry. Terry! What are you doing here? 1180 01:04:01,655 --> 01:04:06,024 - l want to be with you. - No, Terry, that's not gonna happen. 1181 01:04:06,393 --> 01:04:09,021 You know where you belong. On top of me in the Poconos. 1182 01:04:09,863 --> 01:04:11,888 lnstead, you're here selling dirty coffee tables? 1183 01:04:12,065 --> 01:04:13,623 l mean, look at this. This is nonsense! 1184 01:04:13,700 --> 01:04:16,134 Terry, this is an original Haverfield-Jameson. 1185 01:04:16,503 --> 01:04:20,701 The chaos of the coffee table? lt represents our fractured egos. 1186 01:04:21,175 --> 01:04:23,166 You think l don't know about this artsy-fartsy crap? 1187 01:04:23,544 --> 01:04:28,004 This coffee table isn't the ego. lt represents our shattered sense of community 1188 01:04:28,348 --> 01:04:30,111 in the face of capitalist-driven isolation. 1189 01:04:30,417 --> 01:04:32,977 Looks like the work of Cindy Sherman or Frank Stella. 1190 01:04:33,654 --> 01:04:34,951 How did you know that, Terry? 1191 01:04:35,422 --> 01:04:36,821 l took some classes at RlSD 1192 01:04:36,890 --> 01:04:39,222 so l could make fun of these lame artsy douches in my neighborhood. 1193 01:04:39,293 --> 01:04:41,693 - Terry, lower your voice! - l don't have to lower my voice. 1194 01:04:41,762 --> 01:04:44,560 - ls this man bothering you? - Are you actually having sex with this creep? 1195 01:04:44,898 --> 01:04:46,729 Terry, he's gay. Okay? 1196 01:04:48,001 --> 01:04:50,663 He's even wearing a T-shirt that says, ''l'm gay''! 1197 01:04:50,938 --> 01:04:52,803 All right? And also, he is my boss. 1198 01:04:53,140 --> 01:04:54,300 Happy for you, man. Good. 1199 01:04:54,374 --> 01:04:56,239 Can you get out of here now? l'm talking to my lady. 1200 01:04:56,443 --> 01:04:59,776 Mr. Reger, everything is fine. Terry is actually leaving now. 1201 01:05:00,214 --> 01:05:02,273 Nice toot, sailor. Jesus. 1202 01:05:03,517 --> 01:05:05,451 Terry, what are you doing? 1203 01:05:05,953 --> 01:05:09,354 Look, l waited three years for you to be more than a cop, okay? 1204 01:05:09,690 --> 01:05:10,918 Just give me one more year. 1205 01:05:11,358 --> 01:05:13,758 Terry, you don't get another year. l'm done. 1206 01:05:14,261 --> 01:05:15,319 Fine. 1207 01:05:15,796 --> 01:05:18,993 - Terry, don't touch that! Terry! - Oh, my God! 1208 01:05:19,333 --> 01:05:21,267 l don't need this shit. l don't need you! 1209 01:05:22,269 --> 01:05:24,362 And when you call me, l'm not coming back! 1210 01:05:25,639 --> 01:05:28,699 - Oh, boy! Over the top! - How outré! 1211 01:05:29,076 --> 01:05:31,203 l'll burn this bitch down to the ground! 1212 01:05:32,479 --> 01:05:34,811 - Fresh! Energetic! - l love his rawness! 1213 01:05:35,215 --> 01:05:38,742 Stop critiquing me, okay? l'm a human being! l'm not a piece of art! 1214 01:05:39,052 --> 01:05:40,883 - Yes, you are. - Bravo! 1215 01:05:41,221 --> 01:05:43,917 l'm a peacock flying into a rainbow! 1216 01:05:44,591 --> 01:05:46,684 Yes! Yes! 1217 01:05:56,303 --> 01:05:58,897 These braised short ribs taste like a dog's asshole. 1218 01:05:59,006 --> 01:06:00,701 - Sweetie. - You know what, l'm sitting here thinking, 1219 01:06:00,807 --> 01:06:03,970 ''Who in the world would slow roast a dog's asshole 1220 01:06:04,044 --> 01:06:06,012 ''and serve it to their husband?'' 1221 01:06:06,079 --> 01:06:09,515 - You would. - You are being awful. What's wrong? 1222 01:06:09,583 --> 01:06:14,316 - Captain took us off the case. - l'm sorry. 1223 01:06:15,222 --> 01:06:20,057 l told Terry about my dark days in college, and it brought up some feelings. 1224 01:06:20,460 --> 01:06:25,693 Well, honeydick, that was a long time ago. You're not that same person you were. 1225 01:06:25,799 --> 01:06:29,235 No, you don't get it. There is a darkness inside of me. 1226 01:06:29,336 --> 01:06:32,328 lt wants to get out. lt wants to walk around. 1227 01:06:32,406 --> 01:06:35,534 lt wants some walking around money, and it wants to buy some shoes. 1228 01:06:35,642 --> 01:06:40,170 And it wants to walk up with the people and say, ''Hey, Gator don't play no shit.' ' 1229 01:06:40,514 --> 01:06:41,879 - You feel me? - Yeah. 1230 01:06:41,982 --> 01:06:46,043 Gator never been about that, never been about playing no shit. 1231 01:06:49,089 --> 01:06:51,080 - Sweetie, l'm sorry. - lt's okay. 1232 01:06:51,725 --> 01:06:55,092 - l just... - Remember that night we met? 1233 01:06:55,862 --> 01:07:00,526 The attending physician told me, ''We got a drugged-out pimp in the back.' ' 1234 01:07:01,268 --> 01:07:04,704 And l went back there, and l pulled open that curtain, 1235 01:07:04,771 --> 01:07:06,329 and l saw you. 1236 01:07:07,074 --> 01:07:09,406 You were weak, scared, 1237 01:07:09,977 --> 01:07:14,073 ass up, inflamed, crying. 1238 01:07:14,181 --> 01:07:19,278 At that moment, l knew. ''Hey, he's no pimp. Pimps don't cry.' ' 1239 01:07:20,253 --> 01:07:24,747 Pimps don't cry 1240 01:07:26,059 --> 01:07:28,584 Pimps don't cry 1241 01:07:28,695 --> 01:07:31,596 No, they don't 1242 01:07:31,965 --> 01:07:34,934 They don't shed a tear 1243 01:07:35,635 --> 01:07:40,971 Pimps don't cry 1244 01:07:41,241 --> 01:07:43,141 They never shed a tear 1245 01:07:48,047 --> 01:07:51,483 Come lay with me. Be safe, and let's make love. Come on. 1246 01:07:51,584 --> 01:07:53,984 Every time you say, ''Be safe,'' it tears me apart. 1247 01:07:54,087 --> 01:07:56,647 You gotta let me be who l'm gonna be. 1248 01:07:58,258 --> 01:08:00,749 Allen, l'm pregnant. 1249 01:08:01,628 --> 01:08:02,993 Whose baby is that? 1250 01:08:03,096 --> 01:08:06,554 Who's the man who did that to you? Gator's bitches better be using jimmies! 1251 01:08:08,401 --> 01:08:11,461 l'm sorry. See, that's what l'm talking about. 1252 01:08:11,571 --> 01:08:13,163 Oh, my God. 1253 01:08:15,074 --> 01:08:16,473 You need to leave. 1254 01:08:16,576 --> 01:08:20,171 Get out! Get out, Allen! Get out! 1255 01:08:36,963 --> 01:08:37,861 Hey. 1256 01:08:39,131 --> 01:08:41,656 Hey. What are you doing here? 1257 01:08:44,136 --> 01:08:49,199 Come here when l have lady troubles, which means l come here about every night. 1258 01:08:49,308 --> 01:08:51,333 What are you doing here? 1259 01:08:52,511 --> 01:08:55,002 Sheila and l got into it tonight. 1260 01:08:55,881 --> 01:08:58,179 She threw me out. 1261 01:08:59,218 --> 01:09:02,278 Well, you're not a cop till your wife throws you out of the house, partner. 1262 01:09:02,354 --> 01:09:06,188 Does it bother you that the Castien robbers only took 74 grand in diamonds? 1263 01:09:06,525 --> 01:09:08,993 They're junkies. Who cares? l mean... 1264 01:09:09,061 --> 01:09:12,861 l don't know if a junkie can go down a 20-story zipline, though. 1265 01:09:12,965 --> 01:09:13,863 How you fellas doing? 1266 01:09:15,534 --> 01:09:18,697 We're about to have us a little screw party in this red Prius over here 1267 01:09:18,804 --> 01:09:19,998 if you wanna join us. 1268 01:09:20,106 --> 01:09:22,165 You're not going anywhere near that Prius, okay? 1269 01:09:22,508 --> 01:09:25,375 Here's what we're talking about. We're talking about a bunch of hobos 1270 01:09:25,811 --> 01:09:27,745 with fingers in each other's pooper 1271 01:09:27,813 --> 01:09:30,611 in a stranger's car with talk radio playing really loud. 1272 01:09:30,683 --> 01:09:31,843 lt's gonna be a nice evening. 1273 01:09:32,218 --> 01:09:34,516 Well, we're not participating in that. We have no interest. 1274 01:09:34,720 --> 01:09:35,812 Let me rephrase it. 1275 01:09:36,222 --> 01:09:39,055 We got a jar of old mustard, and we got a poodle, 1276 01:09:39,258 --> 01:09:42,421 and we're just get in there and we're gonna put some D's in some A's. 1277 01:09:42,761 --> 01:09:44,592 Hey, are you Dirty Mike and the boys? 1278 01:09:44,663 --> 01:09:47,188 - How do you know who we are? - You left a note in that car. 1279 01:09:47,299 --> 01:09:49,859 - Police, shithead. - He's a copper. We gotta go. Come on! 1280 01:09:49,969 --> 01:09:51,800 Hey! Goose it, boys! They're cops! 1281 01:09:52,271 --> 01:09:54,034 Rub your dicks on the car as you're running away! 1282 01:09:54,106 --> 01:09:56,438 You turned my beautiful Prius into a nightmare! 1283 01:09:56,542 --> 01:10:00,205 We are gonna have sex in your car! lt will happen again! 1284 01:10:02,348 --> 01:10:04,043 l don't know where l'm gonna sleep tonight. 1285 01:10:04,116 --> 01:10:05,913 Fortunately, l know where you're gonna be drinking. 1286 01:10:06,018 --> 01:10:08,350 Jack of All Trades. Drinks on me. Come on. 1287 01:10:08,888 --> 01:10:10,583 - No, l already have a beer. - No, no, no, no. 1288 01:10:10,923 --> 01:10:13,255 l'm talking about doing some serious drinking. 1289 01:10:13,359 --> 01:10:14,690 Drinking with Terry Hoitz. 1290 01:11:03,576 --> 01:11:05,441 This sucks, man. Work our ass off on this case, 1291 01:11:05,511 --> 01:11:07,103 now we gotta hand over all of our evidence? 1292 01:11:07,179 --> 01:11:08,441 Yeah, it's not right. 1293 01:11:08,514 --> 01:11:10,573 Oh, my God, l'm hungover. 1294 01:11:12,918 --> 01:11:13,714 So, you guys are law enforcement? 1295 01:11:14,386 --> 01:11:16,320 Yeah, we're an independent government agency who, 1296 01:11:16,388 --> 01:11:18,288 along with the FBl and the Federal Reserve, 1297 01:11:18,357 --> 01:11:20,518 regulate the stock market and corporate fraud. 1298 01:11:20,859 --> 01:11:23,487 And the Federal Reserve is a prison? 1299 01:11:23,729 --> 01:11:26,493 No, basically, it's a held-for-profit bank that sets interest rates 1300 01:11:26,565 --> 01:11:27,691 and loans money to other banks. 1301 01:11:28,534 --> 01:11:30,729 - ls that a wastebasket? - Yeah, right there. 1302 01:11:30,836 --> 01:11:32,201 Thank you. 1303 01:11:33,906 --> 01:11:37,239 - You all right? - Holy hell! 1304 01:11:38,877 --> 01:11:40,572 l'm so sorry. 1305 01:11:41,180 --> 01:11:42,545 l got so drunk last night. 1306 01:11:42,648 --> 01:11:46,516 l think l thought a tube of toothpaste was astronaut food. 1307 01:11:47,586 --> 01:11:49,383 Come on in, fellas. 1308 01:11:50,489 --> 01:11:52,684 You gotta be kidding me. You're Ershon's lawyer. 1309 01:11:52,758 --> 01:11:54,521 We're turning over our investigation to you? 1310 01:11:54,927 --> 01:11:57,191 Let me assure you there will be no conflict of interest 1311 01:11:57,262 --> 01:11:58,729 between me and David Ershon. 1312 01:11:58,830 --> 01:12:02,926 And if this were an actual investigation, l would immediately recuse myself. 1313 01:12:03,035 --> 01:12:07,267 This is all the evidence we have, and l truly hope you take this seriously. 1314 01:12:07,372 --> 01:12:08,669 Yes. Very much so. 1315 01:12:08,740 --> 01:12:10,503 From everything l've heard, l understand 1316 01:12:10,576 --> 01:12:13,841 you guys are the best at these types of investigations. 1317 01:12:13,912 --> 01:12:16,676 Outside of Enron and AlG 1318 01:12:16,748 --> 01:12:18,215 and Bernie Madoff, 1319 01:12:18,850 --> 01:12:21,546 WorldCom, Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers. 1320 01:12:21,620 --> 01:12:23,520 Okay. Thank you. Thank you, Detective. 1321 01:12:23,589 --> 01:12:25,386 - Would you like a seat, or you're fine? - No, l'm good. 1322 01:12:25,457 --> 01:12:27,084 Okay. Let me just assure you fellas, 1323 01:12:27,559 --> 01:12:30,050 David Ershon is an upstanding citizen. 1324 01:12:30,796 --> 01:12:32,559 l am playing squash with him tonight at the club, 1325 01:12:32,631 --> 01:12:33,461 and we're having dinner. 1326 01:12:34,032 --> 01:12:36,125 You listen to me, you Windsor knot-wearing monkey, 1327 01:12:36,234 --> 01:12:38,293 you play squash with Ershon, right? 1328 01:12:38,403 --> 01:12:41,634 Your kids go to school with his? How would you know if he's clean or not? 1329 01:12:41,740 --> 01:12:43,401 l will take a look at your evidence, 1330 01:12:43,475 --> 01:12:44,703 and l will take a second look at the financials. 1331 01:12:45,410 --> 01:12:47,469 And when l come back and bust your ass, 1332 01:12:47,579 --> 01:12:50,070 we're locking David Ershon in the Federal Reserve! 1333 01:12:50,148 --> 01:12:51,615 He still doesn't understand the concept. 1334 01:13:13,037 --> 01:13:14,561 What are you doing? 1335 01:13:15,106 --> 01:13:18,405 We just handed all of our evidence over to the bad guy's lawyer! 1336 01:13:18,476 --> 01:13:20,740 Are you a big man, huh? 1337 01:13:20,812 --> 01:13:22,279 - l'm talking to you. - What? 1338 01:13:22,447 --> 01:13:25,211 You wake up in the morning, you say, ''l'm putting on my big boy pants''? 1339 01:13:25,283 --> 01:13:26,511 ''Look, l'm wearing a belt! 1340 01:13:26,618 --> 01:13:28,745 - ''l've got big boy pants on!'' - No! 1341 01:13:28,987 --> 01:13:30,750 You borrow a little jacket, you go? 1342 01:13:30,955 --> 01:13:33,014 You take your lunch 'cause you got big boy pants on? 1343 01:13:33,525 --> 01:13:35,356 You got your big boy pants and your snack? 1344 01:13:36,127 --> 01:13:37,754 l could say big, loud things! 1345 01:13:38,263 --> 01:13:39,662 l could be demonstrative! 1346 01:13:39,998 --> 01:13:41,898 - Stop! - We don't, we don't do this! 1347 01:13:42,000 --> 01:13:44,093 You're scaring the shit out of me, man! Stop it! 1348 01:13:44,202 --> 01:13:47,399 ls this how you conduct yourself? ln a democracy? 1349 01:13:47,505 --> 01:13:49,166 What the hell are you doing, man? 1350 01:13:49,607 --> 01:13:54,010 l'm so tired of you getting angry and yelling all the time. 1351 01:13:54,913 --> 01:13:56,574 lt's exhausting. 1352 01:13:58,716 --> 01:14:00,581 l feel like l'm partners with the Hulk. 1353 01:14:01,019 --> 01:14:03,510 You wanna know why l'm so angry all the time? 1354 01:14:03,588 --> 01:14:06,955 'Cause the more l try and do right, the more l screw things up. 1355 01:14:07,692 --> 01:14:12,720 We've got a possible jumper at 3 World Financial Center, 23rd floor. 1356 01:14:12,797 --> 01:14:15,061 All units, fire department, en route. 1357 01:14:15,133 --> 01:14:17,260 - SEC. - Beaman's office. 1358 01:14:17,836 --> 01:14:18,894 We have to go. 1359 01:14:19,103 --> 01:14:20,866 - But the Captain. - We have to go, Allen. 1360 01:14:20,939 --> 01:14:25,638 All units, l need a respondent. Possible jumper, 3 World Financial Center. 1361 01:14:36,787 --> 01:14:38,982 Shit. lt's Beaman! 1362 01:14:39,790 --> 01:14:42,623 - He's gotta know something. - Wesley! 1363 01:14:42,893 --> 01:14:44,724 Detective Hoitz and Gamble. We got this. 1364 01:14:45,162 --> 01:14:47,255 l took an online class at University of Phoenix on negotiating. 1365 01:14:47,831 --> 01:14:49,992 l'm gonna need a priest and a bullhorn. 1366 01:14:50,100 --> 01:14:52,466 - l got no bullhorn. - Does anyone have a bullhorn? 1367 01:14:52,569 --> 01:14:54,764 - Bullhorn, anyone? - Truck. 1368 01:14:55,806 --> 01:14:57,797 Police business. l need to use your PA system. 1369 01:14:57,908 --> 01:14:59,136 Okay, let me turn it on. 1370 01:15:01,078 --> 01:15:03,911 Mr. Beaman? Mr. Don Beaman? 1371 01:15:03,981 --> 01:15:07,178 lt's Wesley. l know Ershon's Wesley's... 1372 01:15:07,284 --> 01:15:10,117 Look, there's a lot to live for in this life. 1373 01:15:10,187 --> 01:15:15,250 A lot of great things, like soda pop, big fresh can of soda pop. 1374 01:15:15,326 --> 01:15:16,691 They do not care! 1375 01:15:16,794 --> 01:15:19,092 Give me this. l know how to talk to him. 1376 01:15:19,163 --> 01:15:22,826 Listen, we all know you're a scumbag, and nobody cares about you. 1377 01:15:22,933 --> 01:15:24,264 Rotten piece of shit. 1378 01:15:24,335 --> 01:15:26,303 That's worse than what l was saying. 1379 01:15:26,704 --> 01:15:28,296 l'm not gonna lie to you, Don. 1380 01:15:28,372 --> 01:15:32,138 People down here are starting to murmur that you don't have the balls to do it. 1381 01:15:32,509 --> 01:15:34,534 - l don't care! - Yeah. 1382 01:15:34,645 --> 01:15:36,977 l say you can do it. 1383 01:15:37,715 --> 01:15:41,708 l mean, l don't want you to jump. l'm just saying you have the capability. 1384 01:15:42,319 --> 01:15:43,377 Look, he's flying! 1385 01:15:49,126 --> 01:15:50,354 Stop that. 1386 01:15:51,128 --> 01:15:52,993 Half empty bottle of gin. Chair knocked over. 1387 01:15:53,063 --> 01:15:56,055 Look at this, it's a clear sign of a struggle. Make sure you get this, all right? 1388 01:15:56,934 --> 01:15:59,801 Detectives, all your work's done here. You can go. 1389 01:15:59,870 --> 01:16:01,462 What about Ershon targeting the lottery? 1390 01:16:01,538 --> 01:16:05,702 You know why Ershon was calling down to the lottery offices all those times? 1391 01:16:05,809 --> 01:16:07,800 Because he was hooking up with the Powerball girl, 1392 01:16:07,878 --> 01:16:10,176 the one on TV with all the numbered balls. 1393 01:16:10,280 --> 01:16:12,441 Yeah. She filed a restraining order on him last week. 1394 01:16:12,950 --> 01:16:14,781 lt was right there in front of you the whole time. 1395 01:16:14,852 --> 01:16:16,820 - Can't be. - You guys are getting transferred. 1396 01:16:16,887 --> 01:16:19,014 - What? - Traffic. 1397 01:16:19,123 --> 01:16:20,215 Yeah, that's right. 1398 01:16:20,324 --> 01:16:23,987 You, you're gonna walk a beat downtown. You're gonna walk a beat downtown. 1399 01:16:24,061 --> 01:16:26,393 - lt's done. No, no. lt's done. - Captain, what are you talking about? 1400 01:16:26,497 --> 01:16:28,362 - Save yourselves some gas. - Captain! 1401 01:16:28,899 --> 01:16:30,298 ls there an appeal process we can... 1402 01:16:30,367 --> 01:16:33,530 Had to do what you had to do, Captain. 1403 01:16:33,637 --> 01:16:35,832 Wow! That hurt. 1404 01:16:37,975 --> 01:16:40,136 - Excuse me. Where's my car? - They towed it. 1405 01:16:40,210 --> 01:16:42,678 Couple of homeless people were messing around in it. 1406 01:16:42,746 --> 01:16:46,409 - That's an official police car. - Could have fooled me. 1407 01:16:51,555 --> 01:16:52,852 Wow, Mauch was upset, huh? 1408 01:16:53,390 --> 01:16:54,550 Really? 1409 01:16:54,658 --> 01:16:57,024 The only thing l had to be proud of in my life was being a detective. 1410 01:16:57,094 --> 01:16:59,654 That was all l had. Now it's gone. 1411 01:17:00,397 --> 01:17:02,888 l know. l know. You still got me. 1412 01:17:03,000 --> 01:17:06,527 Don't you get it? l don't want you, Allen, okay? l never did. 1413 01:17:06,603 --> 01:17:08,833 l told you that scaffolding violation was dogshit. 1414 01:17:09,173 --> 01:17:11,266 l can't believe you still doubt me after everything we've seen. 1415 01:17:11,375 --> 01:17:15,903 lt's a real case, and l'm a real cop. We just got the wrong target for Ershon. 1416 01:17:16,013 --> 01:17:18,243 - You carry a rape whistle. - This is real cop work. 1417 01:17:18,348 --> 01:17:21,181 There is nothing about you that makes a man a man, okay? 1418 01:17:21,251 --> 01:17:24,687 You got no gun, no car, no wife, and now you got no partner. 1419 01:17:24,755 --> 01:17:26,347 Leave me alone. 1420 01:17:26,957 --> 01:17:28,447 A mutt case. 1421 01:17:28,559 --> 01:17:31,084 Terry, l am a cop, for your information, okay? 1422 01:17:31,195 --> 01:17:33,356 A broken partnership. 1423 01:17:33,430 --> 01:17:34,556 l'm a cop! 1424 01:17:34,631 --> 01:17:38,294 And getting busted down to a shitty assignment. 1425 01:17:38,402 --> 01:17:41,462 Allen and Terry hit the trifecta. 1426 01:17:44,241 --> 01:17:47,301 But sometimes when you get your ass kicked, 1427 01:17:48,545 --> 01:17:51,241 that's when you find out what's real... 1428 01:17:53,584 --> 01:17:55,609 ...and what needs doing. 1429 01:18:01,558 --> 01:18:03,617 Whether it's directing traffic... 1430 01:18:03,727 --> 01:18:04,751 Come on! 1431 01:18:05,229 --> 01:18:08,665 ...or cracking a multibillion dollar fraud. 1432 01:18:20,143 --> 01:18:22,236 - Do you work here? - Yeah, l do. 1433 01:18:22,312 --> 01:18:25,145 The wrecking ball that crashed into Castien down there. 1434 01:18:25,249 --> 01:18:26,807 They also did damage to your office? 1435 01:18:26,917 --> 01:18:29,442 Some police officers came by and sealed it off. 1436 01:18:29,520 --> 01:18:30,851 Do you recall what they looked like? 1437 01:18:30,954 --> 01:18:33,650 One of them had an Australian accent. 1438 01:18:34,191 --> 01:18:37,991 You don't happen to do any business for the state lottery, do you? 1439 01:18:38,095 --> 01:18:41,462 No. Our main client is Lendl Global. 1440 01:18:41,532 --> 01:18:43,159 Can l ask what this is about? 1441 01:18:56,613 --> 01:18:58,843 Gator needs his gat, you punkass bitch! 1442 01:19:08,225 --> 01:19:10,318 'Cause that's what a real cop is. 1443 01:19:10,394 --> 01:19:12,885 No, l didn't say ''Lock her up.' ' l never said, ''Lock her up.' ' 1444 01:19:12,996 --> 01:19:15,794 A guy who does what needs to be done. 1445 01:19:15,866 --> 01:19:19,825 A guy who knows how to use his dark side for good. 1446 01:19:19,903 --> 01:19:21,530 And then you move to Florida. 1447 01:19:30,847 --> 01:19:31,973 One, two, three, attack! 1448 01:19:34,685 --> 01:19:35,879 Terry, it's me. 1449 01:19:35,986 --> 01:19:38,216 - Tap out. Tap out. - lt's me, Allen. 1450 01:19:38,322 --> 01:19:39,880 Are you tapping out, or are you hitting me in the face? 1451 01:19:39,990 --> 01:19:41,651 l'm tapping out! 1452 01:19:42,526 --> 01:19:45,552 You crazy? What are you doing, man? 1453 01:19:45,662 --> 01:19:47,095 - They might be watching us. - Could've killed you. 1454 01:19:47,197 --> 01:19:48,323 - Turn out the lights. - What? 1455 01:19:48,398 --> 01:19:49,490 - They could be watching us. - Who? 1456 01:19:49,833 --> 01:19:52,358 l found some big information, okay? 1457 01:19:52,436 --> 01:19:55,564 - About what? - Some scary shit, Terry. This is big. 1458 01:19:55,872 --> 01:19:58,670 How'd you get in here? This place is foolproof. 1459 01:19:58,742 --> 01:20:01,210 - We can't be too careful. - What are you talking about? 1460 01:20:01,278 --> 01:20:04,441 - This place might be bugged. - There's no bugs in here. 1461 01:20:08,719 --> 01:20:11,711 First off, l missed you. 1462 01:20:11,788 --> 01:20:14,586 - What's going on? - Did you hear what l said? 1463 01:20:14,691 --> 01:20:18,684 - Fine, l kind of missed you, too. - Thank you. 1464 01:20:18,762 --> 01:20:23,062 Okay. l found out whose losses Ershon has to cover. 1465 01:20:23,133 --> 01:20:25,431 - lt's Lendl Global. - What? 1466 01:20:25,535 --> 01:20:28,060 Lendl staged the Castien robbery as a distraction 1467 01:20:28,138 --> 01:20:31,130 so they could break into their own accounting firm next door. 1468 01:20:31,241 --> 01:20:34,438 They then altered all the records to cover the losses 1469 01:20:34,544 --> 01:20:37,308 that Ershon had cost them through all of his bad investments. 1470 01:20:37,547 --> 01:20:40,880 You're not supposed to be doing this. You're supposed to be walking the beat. 1471 01:20:40,951 --> 01:20:43,545 l know. Pretty tricky, though, huh? 1472 01:20:44,054 --> 01:20:46,079 This is bad, Allen. This is bad. 1473 01:20:46,156 --> 01:20:48,624 No wonder the captain wanted us to stay out of this. 1474 01:20:48,725 --> 01:20:50,818 Yeah, l bet Beaman started asking questions. 1475 01:20:50,927 --> 01:20:52,895 - That's why they killed him. - Man. 1476 01:20:52,963 --> 01:20:54,123 Here's the other thing. 1477 01:20:54,231 --> 01:20:56,222 Tomorrow, there's a massive business deal going down. 1478 01:20:56,433 --> 01:20:57,798 Ershon's leading it. 1479 01:20:57,901 --> 01:21:00,768 l still can't figure out who the poor sucker is they're making the deal with, 1480 01:21:00,837 --> 01:21:01,997 but we gotta stop it. 1481 01:21:02,105 --> 01:21:03,766 lt's time to let the peacock fly. 1482 01:21:04,808 --> 01:21:06,673 l'm not going, Allen. l like what l do. 1483 01:21:07,110 --> 01:21:09,237 So do l. We're cops. 1484 01:21:09,312 --> 01:21:13,840 No. l like what l do now. l like working traffic. lt's a great gig. 1485 01:21:13,950 --> 01:21:14,974 What? 1486 01:21:15,585 --> 01:21:19,351 l like working traffic. l'm not going with you. 1487 01:21:19,456 --> 01:21:21,947 What is this traffic bullshit? 1488 01:21:25,762 --> 01:21:29,289 - What are you talking about? - l'm talking about my life. 1489 01:21:29,366 --> 01:21:32,096 The corner l run on 54th and 3rd Avenue? lt hums. 1490 01:21:32,169 --> 01:21:35,866 lt's Terry's intersection. And the traffic guys? They're good guys. 1491 01:21:35,972 --> 01:21:38,998 There's this one guy, Phillip? He can pee in the urinal from 20 feet. 1492 01:21:39,109 --> 01:21:40,269 You've gotta see it, Allen. You've got to. 1493 01:21:40,343 --> 01:21:42,971 What happened to you? What happened to this being our time? 1494 01:21:43,280 --> 01:21:45,441 No way, Allen. l'm out. l'm done. 1495 01:21:46,683 --> 01:21:49,550 - Get in the car. - Come on, Allen. We both know it's wooden. 1496 01:21:51,121 --> 01:21:54,955 - Apartment pop. Now get in the car. - You're not gonna shoot me. 1497 01:21:55,025 --> 01:21:57,550 Okay, l'll be honest. This is only the second time l've ever fired this. 1498 01:21:57,794 --> 01:21:58,988 So stop pointing it at me. 1499 01:21:59,062 --> 01:22:03,123 Look, tomorrow morning, all l know is l'm going to Mauch, all right? 1500 01:22:03,366 --> 01:22:04,526 For what? He doesn't care. 1501 01:22:04,634 --> 01:22:07,797 He's been dodging this case for too long and l want answers. 1502 01:22:07,871 --> 01:22:10,135 l want him to look me in the eye and tell me why. 1503 01:22:10,207 --> 01:22:13,005 Turn on the news, man. Nobody cares. 1504 01:22:13,677 --> 01:22:15,042 l hope l'm not alone. 1505 01:22:15,846 --> 01:22:18,371 Hope you bring it. 1506 01:22:20,083 --> 01:22:22,210 We got a big day out there. Big one. 1507 01:22:22,319 --> 01:22:24,810 We got a full moon. People are gonna be amped, all right? 1508 01:22:25,188 --> 01:22:27,679 Let's see what we got on hot tips, all right? 1509 01:22:29,226 --> 01:22:30,318 The new bathmats are in. 1510 01:22:33,163 --> 01:22:37,361 One more thing. We got a serial rapist in Crown Heights. 1511 01:22:37,434 --> 01:22:40,926 Jeez, l'm sorry. That's from my other job. lgnore that. Forget that. 1512 01:22:41,037 --> 01:22:42,197 Well, don't ignore it. 1513 01:22:42,272 --> 01:22:45,503 lf you live in Crown Heights, you know, walk in pairs. 1514 01:22:45,575 --> 01:22:49,909 Gene Mauch to kitchen accessories. Gene Mauch to kitchen accessories. 1515 01:22:50,013 --> 01:22:53,608 l gotta go. Go get 'em. Let's be careful out there. 1516 01:22:55,685 --> 01:22:56,845 The oak. 1517 01:22:56,920 --> 01:23:00,447 l like to keep the oak together and the maple separately, okay? 1518 01:23:00,557 --> 01:23:01,615 And these chopping boards? 1519 01:23:01,892 --> 01:23:02,950 Hey, Captain. 1520 01:23:04,394 --> 01:23:06,919 Hey, Allen. Hey, how you doing? 1521 01:23:07,030 --> 01:23:08,793 What are you doing here? Are you here for the bathmats? 1522 01:23:09,299 --> 01:23:12,962 - l need you to be straight with me. - Straight with us. 1523 01:23:13,069 --> 01:23:15,765 Hey, Terry. Look at this. 1524 01:23:15,872 --> 01:23:19,535 - l thought you were working traffic today. - Let them block the box. 1525 01:23:19,943 --> 01:23:23,401 - Besides, partners' code, right? - Thanks. 1526 01:23:24,948 --> 01:23:27,542 Hey, why have you worked your ass off trying to kill this case? 1527 01:23:28,985 --> 01:23:32,079 All right, fine. l'm gonna tell you guys something. 1528 01:23:32,155 --> 01:23:35,454 You really went into deep water on this one. You really went in deep. 1529 01:23:35,559 --> 01:23:37,493 Ershon's connected to all the higher ups, 1530 01:23:37,594 --> 01:23:40,461 and l gotta save what little ass l have left, okay? 1531 01:23:41,097 --> 01:23:43,258 You keep hiding from shit in the world, 1532 01:23:43,333 --> 01:23:45,597 and eventually the world comes to your front door. 1533 01:23:46,069 --> 01:23:48,299 - Nice. - That's very nice. 1534 01:23:48,405 --> 01:23:49,963 l heard it in an episode of Touched By An Angel. 1535 01:23:50,507 --> 01:23:54,500 You keep this thing real quiet, and you make sure you have real evidence, 1536 01:23:54,611 --> 01:23:56,169 and maybe l'll see what l can do. 1537 01:23:56,279 --> 01:23:57,473 But if you make a lot of noise 1538 01:23:57,581 --> 01:24:00,744 and you attract the media attention, and you bring the DA in on this, 1539 01:24:00,817 --> 01:24:02,341 l am out, okay? 1540 01:24:02,485 --> 01:24:03,782 Yeah, we'll go in there like church mice. 1541 01:24:03,854 --> 01:24:08,257 But there's one case, one case in a career where you go all in. 1542 01:24:08,325 --> 01:24:09,451 This is it. 1543 01:24:10,026 --> 01:24:13,359 All right. Then you do us proud. 1544 01:24:13,864 --> 01:24:15,161 'Cause l don't want no scrubs. 1545 01:24:15,866 --> 01:24:18,426 - Really? - No. 1546 01:24:18,501 --> 01:24:21,834 - You're not aware that's a TLC song? - l have no idea what you're talking about. 1547 01:24:22,105 --> 01:24:23,504 - Second time. - You said chasing waterfalls, 1548 01:24:23,607 --> 01:24:24,767 now you're saying you don't want no scrubs. 1549 01:24:24,841 --> 01:24:26,638 - l don't even understand the reference. - lt's like a tic. 1550 01:24:26,710 --> 01:24:27,836 l have no idea what you're talking about. 1551 01:24:27,944 --> 01:24:30,208 Remember, this thing gets messy, we never talked. 1552 01:24:30,647 --> 01:24:32,342 - You can trust us. - Real quiet. 1553 01:24:32,449 --> 01:24:34,713 You gotta creep. Creep. 1554 01:24:34,985 --> 01:24:36,282 Come on. 1555 01:24:37,220 --> 01:24:39,711 You don't say ''Creep-creep'' unless you're quoting TLC. 1556 01:24:39,990 --> 01:24:41,355 Hey, guys. 1557 01:24:42,325 --> 01:24:44,190 You know Danson and Highsmith were not good cops, right? 1558 01:24:44,861 --> 01:24:46,658 Yeah, l guess we kind of knew that, but it's a drag. 1559 01:24:46,730 --> 01:24:48,630 l mean, at a certain point, who's left to be a hero? 1560 01:24:48,965 --> 01:24:52,128 Not to be corny, maybe it's you guys. 1561 01:24:53,570 --> 01:24:55,128 You ready? 1562 01:24:55,205 --> 01:24:56,866 - Yeah. - Let's go. 1563 01:25:05,382 --> 01:25:07,748 - No, but the highlights are great. - Thank you. 1564 01:25:07,851 --> 01:25:09,910 - Sexy but serious. - Thank you. 1565 01:25:10,020 --> 01:25:11,385 Excuse me. 1566 01:25:12,389 --> 01:25:15,051 Who the hell are all these people? l was only expecting one man. 1567 01:25:15,158 --> 01:25:19,652 You know, they're just some people l owe money to who wanted to be here. 1568 01:25:19,729 --> 01:25:20,821 Who are they? 1569 01:25:22,332 --> 01:25:27,031 Well, they are some Chechen patriots, entrepreneurs. 1570 01:25:27,103 --> 01:25:32,939 And the black chaps are some businessmen from Nigeria. 1571 01:25:33,043 --> 01:25:35,238 You owe money to the Nigerians and Chechens? 1572 01:25:35,345 --> 01:25:36,835 Yes. Yes, l do. 1573 01:25:36,913 --> 01:25:40,076 - You're a piece of work. - Thank you. 1574 01:25:40,250 --> 01:25:43,617 Probably best to get started. 1575 01:25:44,054 --> 01:25:47,512 This is good, baby. We're in the game, we know the score. 1576 01:25:47,590 --> 01:25:50,525 The only thing that bugs me is we still don't know who Ershon's targeting. 1577 01:25:50,593 --> 01:25:54,689 - ls it the lotto? Who is it? - Who cares? Some rich prick. 1578 01:25:54,764 --> 01:26:00,725 l have to tell you, l am tremendously excited by this deal. 1579 01:26:00,804 --> 01:26:03,272 And l can assure you that every dime of your money 1580 01:26:03,373 --> 01:26:06,399 will be invested with the utmost diligence. 1581 01:26:06,476 --> 01:26:08,444 Your rates of return are really exciting. 1582 01:26:08,545 --> 01:26:10,069 We think our members are gonna be just thrilled. 1583 01:26:10,146 --> 01:26:13,980 Yeah. l mean, we've averaged, like, 18% over the last 10 years. 1584 01:26:15,085 --> 01:26:17,280 All right. Quiet as a church mouse, in and out. 1585 01:26:17,387 --> 01:26:19,617 l can feel that tingling in my balls you were talking about. 1586 01:26:19,723 --> 01:26:20,781 Beautiful. 1587 01:26:20,890 --> 01:26:22,289 All right, listen up. 1588 01:26:22,392 --> 01:26:25,293 l am Detective Gamble. This is Detective Hoitz. 1589 01:26:25,395 --> 01:26:27,556 We need your cooperation. 1590 01:26:27,630 --> 01:26:29,097 David Ershon. 1591 01:26:29,165 --> 01:26:31,497 You're under arrest for fraud, embezzlement, 1592 01:26:31,601 --> 01:26:33,296 and in connection to the murder of Don Beaman. 1593 01:26:33,803 --> 01:26:35,236 This is a bad idea. 1594 01:26:35,739 --> 01:26:37,104 Hey, guys. 1595 01:26:38,675 --> 01:26:41,143 Bob? What are you doing here? 1596 01:26:41,611 --> 01:26:42,942 l'm investing. 1597 01:26:43,013 --> 01:26:45,447 Do you remember we talked about that proxy vote a while back? 1598 01:26:45,515 --> 01:26:47,142 - This is what it was for. - Holy shit. 1599 01:26:47,250 --> 01:26:49,775 lt's a more aggressive investment strategy for the pension. 1600 01:26:49,853 --> 01:26:54,085 Allen! We're the suckers. They're targeting the police pension fund. 1601 01:27:00,430 --> 01:27:04,059 Gentlemen, you're here illegally and without a warrant. 1602 01:27:04,968 --> 01:27:06,435 We are within our rights to take action. 1603 01:28:04,827 --> 01:28:06,624 So much for quiet as church mice! 1604 01:28:07,196 --> 01:28:08,288 Go! 1605 01:28:13,436 --> 01:28:14,801 Who the hell are those guys? 1606 01:28:14,871 --> 01:28:17,931 Gentlemen, l can get you obstructed view tickets for Rock of Ages. 1607 01:28:18,007 --> 01:28:21,966 Even l admit that's not very tempting, but l'm not made of tickets, God damn it! 1608 01:28:22,045 --> 01:28:24,013 - Get in the front! - How do you start this freaking thing? 1609 01:28:24,280 --> 01:28:25,269 Go on! Go! 1610 01:28:26,015 --> 01:28:27,004 - Shit! - Go! 1611 01:28:29,485 --> 01:28:30,474 Oh, my... 1612 01:28:31,888 --> 01:28:34,755 Jeanie! Get over here! You, go get the bloody car! 1613 01:29:21,337 --> 01:29:22,326 Hold the wheel! 1614 01:29:28,044 --> 01:29:30,410 - Open the back! - l got it. l got it! 1615 01:29:38,421 --> 01:29:41,356 They're gonna kill me. And then they will kill you. 1616 01:29:41,457 --> 01:29:43,857 - Well, l'm gonna kill you first! - And then they will kill me. 1617 01:29:43,960 --> 01:29:46,986 We have two rogue police officers. They are armed and dangerous, 1618 01:29:47,096 --> 01:29:48,757 - and holding David Ershon hostage. - Stupid pricks! 1619 01:29:48,831 --> 01:29:52,323 - lt's us, we're good guys! - Exactly. They're the good guys. 1620 01:29:52,435 --> 01:29:54,596 Where do we go? Where do we go? 1621 01:29:54,670 --> 01:29:57,332 l have a small apartment. No one knows about it. 1622 01:29:57,440 --> 01:30:00,136 l use it mainly for my parents and prostitutes. 1623 01:30:00,209 --> 01:30:02,302 Not at the same time. That would be wrong. 1624 01:30:05,548 --> 01:30:08,244 Let's hear it from the top, every detail. 1625 01:30:08,818 --> 01:30:13,448 l think the best way to tell the story is by starting at the end, briefly, 1626 01:30:13,523 --> 01:30:18,517 then going back to the beginning, and then periodically returning to the end, 1627 01:30:18,628 --> 01:30:21,688 maybe giving different characters' perspectives throughout. 1628 01:30:21,798 --> 01:30:25,097 Just to give it a bit of dynamism, otherwise, it's just sort of a linear story. 1629 01:30:25,168 --> 01:30:26,328 Just tell us what happened. 1630 01:30:26,435 --> 01:30:29,165 l lost a bunch of money from some people and now they want it back. 1631 01:30:29,505 --> 01:30:30,802 What about Don Beaman? 1632 01:30:30,873 --> 01:30:33,364 Beaman knew that l had falsified my financials, 1633 01:30:33,476 --> 01:30:35,774 so they sent down Wesley to try and keep him quiet. 1634 01:30:36,478 --> 01:30:38,343 He forced him at gunpoint to drink a bunch of gin 1635 01:30:38,447 --> 01:30:40,472 and then forced him onto the ledge. 1636 01:30:40,549 --> 01:30:42,278 lt was only a matter of time before he fell. 1637 01:30:42,350 --> 01:30:45,786 At least we stopped you from getting the pension fund. 1638 01:30:45,854 --> 01:30:49,119 Well, but, yeah, but you didn't. lt's already in my account. 1639 01:30:49,191 --> 01:30:51,785 By 9:00 in the morning, it goes into the Lendl equity fund 1640 01:30:51,860 --> 01:30:54,556 and from there it's transferred to a dozen offshore accounts. 1641 01:30:54,663 --> 01:30:56,187 By 9:01, it's gone. 1642 01:30:56,298 --> 01:30:59,290 - Well, what if we stop the transfer? - But you can't. l mean, there's a... 1643 01:30:59,367 --> 01:31:01,835 What if we stop the transfer? 1644 01:31:01,903 --> 01:31:04,804 You'd have to be at Endemic Bank for 9:00 exactly, 1645 01:31:04,873 --> 01:31:07,341 find the clerk, get the routing number. 1646 01:31:07,409 --> 01:31:08,467 We gotta stop it. 1647 01:31:08,543 --> 01:31:09,737 There's no way. 1648 01:31:09,845 --> 01:31:13,474 Every cop, the crazy Australian and his crew, they'll all be after us. 1649 01:31:13,548 --> 01:31:17,644 You could let me go, and l'll give you $10 million each. 1650 01:31:18,253 --> 01:31:21,313 - lt's not a bribe. - Of course it's a bribe. 1651 01:31:21,389 --> 01:31:23,516 You're offering to pay us money to not do our job. 1652 01:31:25,594 --> 01:31:26,856 lt's not a bribe. 1653 01:31:27,496 --> 01:31:29,896 We hang low here tonight. Nobody knows about this place. 1654 01:31:29,998 --> 01:31:31,727 We'll be safe. And tomorrow, we hit it. 1655 01:31:32,501 --> 01:31:34,025 First things first, l gotta go see Sheila. 1656 01:31:34,102 --> 01:31:35,501 No way, it's too dangerous. 1657 01:31:35,604 --> 01:31:37,902 Look, Terry, we don't know what's gonna happen to us tomorrow, 1658 01:31:38,006 --> 01:31:41,533 but tonight, l need to make things right with Sheila. 1659 01:31:42,043 --> 01:31:43,943 All right, go. Go. Be careful. 1660 01:31:44,412 --> 01:31:46,039 Thanks, l will. 1661 01:31:46,882 --> 01:31:48,110 Will you say hi to Sheila for me? 1662 01:31:48,283 --> 01:31:50,046 - Okay. - Okay. 1663 01:31:50,118 --> 01:31:53,087 Tell her. Say Terry was asking about you. 1664 01:31:53,188 --> 01:31:54,621 He wants to make sure you know 1665 01:31:54,723 --> 01:31:57,089 that he'll be there for you if anything happens. 1666 01:31:57,192 --> 01:31:59,251 - Yeah. - Drop of a hat, l'm there. 1667 01:31:59,461 --> 01:32:01,452 Look, it's starting to get a little weird, man. 1668 01:32:01,563 --> 01:32:04,464 lf something happens to you, l need to be there to take care of her. 1669 01:32:04,566 --> 01:32:07,467 All of her wants, her needs, and desires are now my responsibility. 1670 01:32:07,569 --> 01:32:09,730 Why do you say it like it's a predetermined thing? 1671 01:32:09,938 --> 01:32:11,303 Just go, man. 1672 01:32:12,040 --> 01:32:13,530 Okay. Thanks. 1673 01:32:14,476 --> 01:32:15,568 Go. 1674 01:32:19,548 --> 01:32:20,708 Janeco Gallery. 1675 01:32:21,650 --> 01:32:23,743 Francine, it's Terry. Please don't hang up. 1676 01:32:34,462 --> 01:32:35,622 Please pick up. 1677 01:32:36,498 --> 01:32:37,658 Hello. 1678 01:32:37,766 --> 01:32:40,929 Hey, sweetie. l was praying you'd be at your mom's house. 1679 01:32:41,002 --> 01:32:44,267 You know what, l can't talk anymore. l think the phone's being tapped. 1680 01:32:44,506 --> 01:32:46,997 Baby, where are you? l wanna see you. 1681 01:32:47,108 --> 01:32:49,269 l'm near the place where we did it three Halloweens ago. 1682 01:32:49,344 --> 01:32:50,402 Do you remember? 1683 01:32:51,346 --> 01:32:52,745 Okay, yeah, l got it. 1684 01:32:52,814 --> 01:32:56,443 l'm just warning you, though. Watch out. l think they're watching the house. 1685 01:32:56,518 --> 01:32:59,112 Don't worry, sweetie. l think l have a way of talking to you. 1686 01:32:59,654 --> 01:33:03,590 l have to admit, l wasn't gonna come. l mean... 1687 01:33:04,759 --> 01:33:08,195 After all those years, after the restraining order. 1688 01:33:08,296 --> 01:33:11,663 l was worried l might not see you again. 1689 01:33:11,766 --> 01:33:13,358 There's some very dangerous people after him, 1690 01:33:13,468 --> 01:33:14,492 and now they're after us. 1691 01:33:17,706 --> 01:33:19,105 lt's just the old lady. 1692 01:33:24,679 --> 01:33:26,112 Hello, Allen. 1693 01:33:26,180 --> 01:33:28,774 Hello, Mama Ramos. What are you doing out here? 1694 01:33:28,850 --> 01:33:31,944 Sheila said she doesn't know what happened and she wants you back. 1695 01:33:33,287 --> 01:33:35,152 - She also says... - Yes. 1696 01:33:35,223 --> 01:33:39,057 ...she wants you on top of her, holding her hair, 1697 01:33:39,160 --> 01:33:41,185 and riding her like a bucking bronco 1698 01:33:41,829 --> 01:33:45,458 while she sucks your thumb and says, ''Mommy likey.' ' 1699 01:33:46,300 --> 01:33:47,858 You, you tell your daughter... 1700 01:33:48,236 --> 01:33:50,670 He said he'll always love you. 1701 01:33:50,738 --> 01:33:53,400 And he's so happy that you're having his child. 1702 01:33:53,508 --> 01:33:54,668 Allen. 1703 01:33:54,742 --> 01:33:56,573 He also says that 1704 01:33:56,677 --> 01:34:00,704 he wants you to stare into each other's eyes without blinking while you do it. 1705 01:34:01,349 --> 01:34:03,874 - l love when we do that, Mom. - And then afterward, 1706 01:34:03,951 --> 01:34:05,919 lick the sex off each other. 1707 01:34:07,789 --> 01:34:09,689 l don't wanna do this. 1708 01:34:11,092 --> 01:34:14,493 - You say things that are too personal. - Okay, but just one more thing. 1709 01:34:14,829 --> 01:34:16,763 She said she loves you, 1710 01:34:16,831 --> 01:34:19,925 and wants to hold your hand and have iced tea with you. 1711 01:34:20,601 --> 01:34:23,126 Come on. That's not all she said. 1712 01:34:23,604 --> 01:34:24,798 No. 1713 01:34:25,873 --> 01:34:29,468 - She says other things, but l don't want... - Please, please, please. 1714 01:34:29,544 --> 01:34:31,808 You don't realize, l may be killed tomorrow. 1715 01:34:32,280 --> 01:34:33,474 Okay. 1716 01:34:36,017 --> 01:34:40,886 She says she wants to unplug all the clocks and the phones 1717 01:34:40,955 --> 01:34:44,186 - and have a three-day F marathon. - That's more like it. Yeah. 1718 01:34:44,492 --> 01:34:49,623 She wants to walk wrong for a week because you guys F'd so hard. 1719 01:34:49,697 --> 01:34:50,925 That's just lovely. 1720 01:34:51,332 --> 01:34:54,961 No more! He says things l can't say. 1721 01:34:55,036 --> 01:35:00,804 lt involves a mannequin hand and an electric shaver taped to a golf club. 1722 01:35:09,350 --> 01:35:10,408 Now what'd she say? 1723 01:35:12,887 --> 01:35:14,650 She says she loves you. 1724 01:35:20,895 --> 01:35:23,227 l'm so sorry about everything. 1725 01:35:26,367 --> 01:35:29,537 And l just had to come here tonight to tell you that l love you. 1726 01:35:29,572 --> 01:35:32,506 And the reason why l act like you're a plain wife is that 1727 01:35:34,175 --> 01:35:38,236 l'm afraid that if l admit to how stunning 1728 01:35:38,346 --> 01:35:41,144 and intelligent and wonderful you are, 1729 01:35:42,016 --> 01:35:45,850 - l'd just lose you. - Shut up, Allen. l love you. 1730 01:35:46,354 --> 01:35:49,152 We have a place that's safe. All right. 1731 01:36:01,702 --> 01:36:02,930 l'm gonna break your hip. 1732 01:36:11,712 --> 01:36:14,010 l'm about to do you grandpa-style. 1733 01:36:29,430 --> 01:36:31,057 l brought some music. 1734 01:36:35,569 --> 01:36:37,560 Not what l would've chosen, but screw it. 1735 01:36:37,638 --> 01:36:40,903 All right. Let's go, Monday morning, time to go to work. 1736 01:36:40,975 --> 01:36:42,101 Let's do it. 1737 01:36:42,209 --> 01:36:43,938 - You want my gate code? - Shut up, man! 1738 01:36:51,485 --> 01:36:52,577 That's Wesley! 1739 01:37:03,631 --> 01:37:04,723 Yes! 1740 01:37:07,134 --> 01:37:09,659 - Where'd you learn to drive like that? - Grand Theft Auto! 1741 01:37:12,606 --> 01:37:13,834 Shit, Allen, they're coming. 1742 01:37:16,744 --> 01:37:19,304 - Oh, my God! - Shit. 1743 01:37:20,581 --> 01:37:22,276 - Do something, Allen! - Hold on, hold on. 1744 01:37:43,771 --> 01:37:45,568 Someone's been playing Grand Theft Auto. 1745 01:37:47,341 --> 01:37:48,672 l did that! 1746 01:37:48,775 --> 01:37:50,436 - l did that! - Oh, my God! 1747 01:37:50,511 --> 01:37:52,809 - That's what l'm talking about! - We jackknifed them! 1748 01:37:52,880 --> 01:37:55,371 Did you see that? lt went backwards and then turned upside-down. 1749 01:37:55,482 --> 01:37:59,043 Gator turns vans upside-down like they're in a crazy washing machine! 1750 01:37:59,153 --> 01:38:01,087 Why are you calling yourself Gator? 1751 01:38:01,655 --> 01:38:04,419 lt's a nickname l had in college. l used to run a dating service. 1752 01:38:04,491 --> 01:38:07,688 - He was a pimp. - Yeah, l was. l was a pimp. 1753 01:38:07,828 --> 01:38:10,296 ls it me or does it smell like deer vagina in here? 1754 01:38:11,331 --> 01:38:12,457 My poor car. 1755 01:38:12,799 --> 01:38:15,267 Right now the streets are a bloodbath. 1756 01:38:15,369 --> 01:38:18,463 And, statistically speaking, there's about 30 kids in here, 1757 01:38:18,572 --> 01:38:20,563 10 of you are gonna be dead before your next birthday. 1758 01:38:20,874 --> 01:38:23,934 Got a couple of tips, help you guys stay out of jail. 1759 01:38:24,044 --> 01:38:28,276 One, try your hardest to not be black or Hispanic. 1760 01:38:28,382 --> 01:38:30,612 - lt's a good tip. - Yeah. Two... 1761 01:38:30,717 --> 01:38:32,014 Gentlemen, we got a hot one. 1762 01:38:32,085 --> 01:38:35,714 Hoitz and Gamble have Ershon hostage, high-speed car chase in progress. 1763 01:38:35,789 --> 01:38:37,757 Yes! Gun, gun! 1764 01:38:37,858 --> 01:38:39,792 Pass up the guns. Pass them up. Let's go, people. 1765 01:38:39,893 --> 01:38:41,520 There we go. Anything, any Tasers? No? 1766 01:38:41,595 --> 01:38:43,028 Good. Who wants to go on a ride-along? 1767 01:38:43,096 --> 01:38:44,563 l do! 1768 01:38:45,065 --> 01:38:46,430 All right, you, sweetie. Come on, let's go. Move. 1769 01:38:46,533 --> 01:38:47,727 - Move! Let's go. - Come on! 1770 01:38:58,278 --> 01:39:01,145 Cool, a helicopter! Must be covering the high-speed chase. 1771 01:39:06,419 --> 01:39:07,784 Jesus! 1772 01:39:12,625 --> 01:39:15,423 - Who are those guys? - They're Chechen investors. 1773 01:39:15,495 --> 01:39:18,555 We were gonna do a Chechen version of Dora the Explorer. 1774 01:39:18,631 --> 01:39:20,223 Anyway, it went terribly wrong. 1775 01:39:23,403 --> 01:39:25,598 l feel like it's not fair that they have a helicopter! 1776 01:39:26,606 --> 01:39:27,664 Oh, no. 1777 01:39:29,075 --> 01:39:30,133 Damn it. 1778 01:39:34,013 --> 01:39:36,481 Watch your head. God, your hair is soft. 1779 01:39:36,583 --> 01:39:38,016 VO5 Hot Oil. 1780 01:39:41,354 --> 01:39:43,652 You're gonna wreck! There's cars coming from both directions! 1781 01:39:43,756 --> 01:39:44,848 l'm not gonna wreck! 1782 01:39:46,826 --> 01:39:48,589 - l'm gonna wreck! You're right! - You want me to drive? 1783 01:40:08,615 --> 01:40:11,277 - This was a very clever idea. - Yeah. 1784 01:40:23,363 --> 01:40:24,660 They're gone. 1785 01:40:26,065 --> 01:40:27,157 Let's go. 1786 01:40:39,479 --> 01:40:42,915 They are Nigerians. Yeah, l'd forgotten about them. 1787 01:40:50,790 --> 01:40:52,018 - This is a shortcut. - Are you kidding me? 1788 01:40:52,091 --> 01:40:53,319 You cannot go down there. 1789 01:41:01,234 --> 01:41:02,724 What are you doing? 1790 01:41:08,941 --> 01:41:10,033 Hit him! 1791 01:41:17,750 --> 01:41:19,115 - Where are we? - Chelsea Pier. 1792 01:41:25,591 --> 01:41:26,683 What the hell? 1793 01:41:28,027 --> 01:41:29,085 Jesus! 1794 01:41:36,469 --> 01:41:38,300 Them having a helicopter is definitely cheating. 1795 01:41:39,072 --> 01:41:40,130 Go! 1796 01:41:45,278 --> 01:41:46,370 Come on! 1797 01:41:48,247 --> 01:41:49,805 We're cops! Hit the chopper! 1798 01:42:12,739 --> 01:42:15,606 This is Martin and Fosse, en route. Back off! This is our collar! 1799 01:42:17,443 --> 01:42:20,105 Set up a perimeter. No arrests until we get there! 1800 01:42:20,413 --> 01:42:21,471 Take the light! 1801 01:42:41,667 --> 01:42:43,191 Do not authorize that transfer. 1802 01:42:43,302 --> 01:42:44,860 This is David Ershon. The transfer is for him. 1803 01:42:44,971 --> 01:42:47,371 He will tell you not to authorize it, okay? Tell him. 1804 01:42:47,473 --> 01:42:50,101 - Tell him! - Yeah, do as they say. Stop the transfer. 1805 01:42:50,176 --> 01:42:51,143 Approve it. 1806 01:42:52,711 --> 01:42:53,803 Now. 1807 01:42:53,879 --> 01:42:55,471 Do not touch anything! 1808 01:42:55,881 --> 01:42:58,145 l swear to God l'll blow your head all over this desk. 1809 01:42:58,217 --> 01:43:00,651 Not a person in this room believes you'll shoot this clerk. 1810 01:43:00,719 --> 01:43:01,811 Yeah? 1811 01:43:03,188 --> 01:43:06,680 Thank you so much, gentlemen, for the prompt delivery of Mr. Ershon. 1812 01:43:06,792 --> 01:43:10,193 l have two competing bids from jilted investors. 1813 01:43:10,896 --> 01:43:13,126 They're at 30 million, and holding. 1814 01:43:13,832 --> 01:43:15,800 - Wait! Can't you let me... - Take him away. 1815 01:43:16,368 --> 01:43:17,892 But computers. 1816 01:43:20,072 --> 01:43:23,473 What if, one day, they were in charge? 1817 01:43:25,044 --> 01:43:29,140 Now if you don't shut up, l will cut your ear off with a butter knife. 1818 01:43:29,214 --> 01:43:31,307 That's blunt. Blunt's worse than if it's sharp. 1819 01:43:31,383 --> 01:43:32,645 Now! 1820 01:43:39,692 --> 01:43:40,852 You just stood there! 1821 01:43:40,959 --> 01:43:43,723 l didn't know that ''now'' meant that. How am l supposed to know that? 1822 01:43:43,829 --> 01:43:45,694 - l knew what that meant. - Shut up. 1823 01:43:45,798 --> 01:43:48,824 You kill us and you kill Ershon. You're out 30 million dollars. 1824 01:43:48,901 --> 01:43:50,994 - Who's got the golden goose now, huh? - Yeah. 1825 01:43:55,040 --> 01:43:56,632 Shit! 1826 01:43:57,309 --> 01:43:59,470 He's still valuable with a bullet wound, mate. 1827 01:43:59,545 --> 01:44:01,410 He immediately called your bluff. 1828 01:44:01,513 --> 01:44:03,344 Get up. And kill the police. 1829 01:44:03,415 --> 01:44:04,882 l just wanna make sure l get it right. 1830 01:44:04,983 --> 01:44:08,384 Did you want this transfer approved or not approved? 1831 01:44:08,854 --> 01:44:11,220 You, mate, l'm gonna kill just for fun. 1832 01:44:12,758 --> 01:44:15,556 Police, don't move! Drop your weapons! 1833 01:44:15,661 --> 01:44:18,596 Drop it, or be dropped, homeboy! 1834 01:44:18,664 --> 01:44:21,599 l hope you like the taste of prison food and penis. 1835 01:44:21,700 --> 01:44:24,464 - Police! Down on the ground! - Let me see your hands! 1836 01:44:32,277 --> 01:44:34,643 - Hey, hey, you okay? - Hey. 1837 01:44:35,547 --> 01:44:37,913 Hey, Gene. Captain. l'm sorry. 1838 01:44:38,217 --> 01:44:39,912 - l'm sorry. - That's okay. Don't worry about it. 1839 01:44:39,985 --> 01:44:41,384 You can call me Gene when we're not in the office. 1840 01:44:41,954 --> 01:44:44,081 Okay. Thanks for coming by. 1841 01:44:44,156 --> 01:44:46,249 Attaboy. 1842 01:44:46,325 --> 01:44:48,384 Come on, stay with me. Stay with me. 1843 01:44:48,627 --> 01:44:51,221 We're losing him! We're losing him! He's dying! 1844 01:44:51,963 --> 01:44:55,296 No. No, no, no, no. l'm just resting. l'm just resting. l was just resting. 1845 01:44:55,400 --> 01:44:57,561 l'm sorry. Did l hurt you? 1846 01:44:57,635 --> 01:44:59,159 - Are you all right? - Just resting. 1847 01:44:59,270 --> 01:45:00,669 Hey, let me tell you something. 1848 01:45:00,772 --> 01:45:03,605 As far as paperwork goes, we'll take care of it. 1849 01:45:03,942 --> 01:45:05,500 - You know why? - Why? 1850 01:45:05,610 --> 01:45:07,100 Ain't too proud to beg. 1851 01:45:07,745 --> 01:45:08,939 Come on. 1852 01:45:09,013 --> 01:45:10,844 - What? - lt's not funny anymore. 1853 01:45:10,949 --> 01:45:13,474 - l don't know what you're talking about. - TLC references. 1854 01:45:13,585 --> 01:45:15,576 Still nothing. l swear to you. 1855 01:45:15,920 --> 01:45:21,256 l'm gonna go over and check on Terry. l got a bad knee. Hold on. There you go. 1856 01:45:21,326 --> 01:45:24,124 lt was the king of the mutt cases, 1857 01:45:24,195 --> 01:45:27,323 but Allen and Terry had worked it like stars. 1858 01:45:30,201 --> 01:45:33,329 Within 24 hours of learning about Ershon's scheme 1859 01:45:33,438 --> 01:45:35,463 and Lendl's massive losses, 1860 01:45:35,540 --> 01:45:38,270 the government issued TARP funds to bail out Lendl. 1861 01:45:38,343 --> 01:45:42,871 Lendl is in everything, and we're gonna go everywhere... 1862 01:45:42,981 --> 01:45:44,312 They were too big to fail. 1863 01:45:44,882 --> 01:45:50,047 Ershon now resides in Palomino Federal Correctional Facility in Florida. 1864 01:45:50,154 --> 01:45:53,214 He still invests. Currency's just different. 1865 01:45:54,291 --> 01:45:56,691 Roger Wesley was linked to the Beaman murder 1866 01:45:56,794 --> 01:46:00,594 by security cam footage which Martin and Fosse hadn't checked. 1867 01:46:00,664 --> 01:46:02,495 lt only showed the back of their heads. 1868 01:46:02,600 --> 01:46:06,696 But Allen's Faceback app was able to get a match to their faces. 1869 01:46:07,171 --> 01:46:09,036 Terry married Francine. 1870 01:46:09,140 --> 01:46:12,109 He played harp at the reception and it was beautiful. 1871 01:46:12,176 --> 01:46:13,700 He had learned how to play it in the eighth grade 1872 01:46:13,811 --> 01:46:17,178 to make fun of the fairy that lived up the street. 1873 01:46:17,281 --> 01:46:20,773 Terry asked Sheila to be his best man, but she declined. 1874 01:46:21,052 --> 01:46:25,284 Let's be honest, we all wanna be superstars and hotshots. 1875 01:46:25,356 --> 01:46:26,584 But guess what? 1876 01:46:26,657 --> 01:46:30,149 The people that do the real work, the ones that make the difference, 1877 01:46:30,428 --> 01:46:33,420 you don't see them on TV or on the front page. 1878 01:46:34,065 --> 01:46:37,523 l'm talking about the day-in, day-outers, the grinders. 1879 01:46:37,668 --> 01:46:40,796 Come on, man, you know who l'm talking about/ the other guys. 1880 01:46:40,871 --> 01:46:42,031 - See? That's a no-go. - Hey, hey. 1881 01:46:42,807 --> 01:46:44,798 You think you broke this Ershon case open? 1882 01:46:45,209 --> 01:46:46,437 You did nothing. 1883 01:46:46,844 --> 01:46:48,436 Corporate lobbyists are spending millions 1884 01:46:48,512 --> 01:46:50,776 to make sure guys like Ershon keep doing what they do. 1885 01:46:51,649 --> 01:46:52,638 Derek Jeter? 1886 01:46:54,051 --> 01:46:57,145 Yeah, it's me. You were set up that night you shot me, Terry. 1887 01:46:57,455 --> 01:47:00,253 - l told you! - They knew by putting someone like you 1888 01:47:00,324 --> 01:47:03,293 with a quick trigger finger next to that door where l do my pre-game walk, 1889 01:47:03,461 --> 01:47:05,827 it'd end up bad. Bad for both of us. 1890 01:47:06,363 --> 01:47:08,456 Now, l've been doing my own investigation on the banking industry, 1891 01:47:08,599 --> 01:47:10,658 and l was close. l was real close. 1892 01:47:11,068 --> 01:47:12,228 So l forgive you, Terry. 1893 01:47:12,803 --> 01:47:14,896 l appreciate that, man. l'm sorry about what happened. 1894 01:47:15,673 --> 01:47:16,662 l'm glad you're doing better. 1895 01:47:17,141 --> 01:47:19,439 The whole damn system is clogged up with dirty money. 1896 01:47:20,044 --> 01:47:23,275 And the news doesn't say a word about it. 'Cause who owns them? 1897 01:47:23,447 --> 01:47:25,881 The same corporations that own the government. 1898 01:47:26,484 --> 01:47:28,179 Courts and the law is all we have left. 1899 01:47:29,520 --> 01:47:30,953 So here's you guys' next case. 1900 01:47:32,089 --> 01:47:34,990 Guy by the name of Carl Bachand, CEO of Killister Bank. 1901 01:47:35,626 --> 01:47:39,460 He took three billion in TARP funds. He's crooked. He's real crooked. 1902 01:47:39,997 --> 01:47:44,593 Take him down, but be careful. He's got Blackwater mercenaries 24l7. 1903 01:47:45,636 --> 01:47:46,796 Thanks, Derek. 1904 01:47:48,105 --> 01:47:50,232 Hey, Derek! Wait! What if we need to get in touch with you, 1905 01:47:50,307 --> 01:47:52,673 get some more information or some tickets or something? 1906 01:47:53,410 --> 01:47:54,570 What just happened? 1907 01:47:57,414 --> 01:48:00,508 Goldman Sachs. This case is gonna be nasty. 1908 01:48:03,187 --> 01:48:04,882 Hi. Cute glasses. 1909 01:48:05,890 --> 01:48:07,858 - What was that? - What? 1910 01:48:07,925 --> 01:48:11,554 What? Dude, what is it with you and hot ladies? What's your secret? 1911 01:48:11,629 --> 01:48:14,291 Honestly, l have no idea what you're talking about. 1912 01:48:14,398 --> 01:48:16,423 Tell me who you lost your virginity to. 1913 01:48:16,534 --> 01:48:19,560 She actually became a TV actress. Heather Locklear. 1914 01:48:19,637 --> 01:48:21,298 Heather Locklear, what? 1915 01:48:21,405 --> 01:48:23,032 - You've heard of her? - Come on! 1916 01:48:23,107 --> 01:48:26,907 - She was much chubbier back then. - l don't get it. l really, l don't get it. 1917 01:53:27,810 --> 01:53:29,471 That was you. You don't have a sense of humor. 1918 01:53:29,579 --> 01:53:31,046 l do... l have a wonderful sense of humor. 1919 01:53:31,547 --> 01:53:33,105 lf you say something funny, l'll laugh. 1920 01:53:33,182 --> 01:53:35,878 - All right, l'm gonna tell you a great joke. - Please. l love jokes. 1921 01:53:36,018 --> 01:53:38,578 All right. Little boy on his 13th birthday. 1922 01:53:39,989 --> 01:53:43,117 - lt's time to get laid. - Already feels inappropriate. 1923 01:53:43,426 --> 01:53:45,189 So he goes to the lady at the whorehouse, he goes, ''Miss, 1924 01:53:45,561 --> 01:53:48,724 ''look, l know usually you want money, but l don't have any money and it's my birthday. 1925 01:53:49,065 --> 01:53:50,828 ''Do you think l could have sex with you for this duck?'' 1926 01:53:51,367 --> 01:53:53,562 - Was he a farmer? - No. 1927 01:53:53,770 --> 01:53:58,070 That's probably a Health Code violation, bringing a duck into a place of prostitution. 1928 01:53:58,508 --> 01:54:00,066 They weren't gonna have sex with the duck! 1929 01:54:00,343 --> 01:54:02,106 No, l just mean Health Code violation 1930 01:54:02,178 --> 01:54:05,773 to have the duck brought into a facility like that. 1931 01:54:07,283 --> 01:54:09,444 So, anyway, she says, ''Yes, l'll do it.' ' 1932 01:54:09,986 --> 01:54:12,420 So he goes in there, gives it to her. 1933 01:54:12,989 --> 01:54:16,152 - He gives her what? - The high, hard one! She loves it. 1934 01:54:16,425 --> 01:54:19,417 She goes, ''You know what? lf you do that again, l'll give you your duck back.' ' 1935 01:54:19,762 --> 01:54:21,696 - lt's like getting laid twice for free. - So... l'm sorry. 1936 01:54:21,764 --> 01:54:22,890 l'm so sorry. 1937 01:54:23,199 --> 01:54:27,135 - The duck is payment for sexual intercourse. - Yes. Yes. 1938 01:54:27,303 --> 01:54:28,463 - Very good. - He used the duck as payment, 1939 01:54:28,538 --> 01:54:30,130 and now he's being paid back the duck. 1940 01:54:30,573 --> 01:54:33,667 He goes, ''Oh, my God, this is the greatest birthday ever.' ' He does it again. 1941 01:54:33,976 --> 01:54:37,537 - Now he's walking home, right? Walking... - So she was satisfied with duck. 1942 01:54:37,847 --> 01:54:39,838 - With a duck as currency... - Yes. 1943 01:54:39,916 --> 01:54:42,384 ...to her. Great. Good. 1944 01:54:42,718 --> 01:54:46,449 So he's walking home, now he can't wait to get home to tell his father. Right? 1945 01:54:46,823 --> 01:54:48,984 He's walking down the street with the duck, and all of a sudden, voom, 1946 01:54:49,058 --> 01:54:50,457 truck comes by and runs over his duck. 1947 01:54:50,560 --> 01:54:51,959 - Kills the duck? - Killed the duck. 1948 01:54:52,028 --> 01:54:54,189 - So the duck is now dead. - The duck is dead. 1949 01:54:54,664 --> 01:54:57,963 The kid starts crying, truck driver stops, he's all upset, he didn't mean... 1950 01:54:58,134 --> 01:55:01,262 Of course he's crying! He's a 13-year-old boy who's just had sex, twice, 1951 01:55:01,437 --> 01:55:04,895 - and he watched his beloved duck die. - Will you shut up and let me tell the story? 1952 01:55:05,074 --> 01:55:06,974 So far, l don't know how this is ever gonna be funny. 1953 01:55:07,276 --> 01:55:09,744 The guy feels so bad about killing the duck, he gives him two dollars. 1954 01:55:10,112 --> 01:55:11,443 And the kid's happy with the two bucks? 1955 01:55:11,948 --> 01:55:15,406 He's ecstatic! He got laid twice, and now he's got two dollars on top of it. 1956 01:55:15,484 --> 01:55:17,952 Seems like a duck would be worth a lot more than two dollars. 1957 01:55:19,121 --> 01:55:20,645 This was a while back. You what l'm... 1958 01:55:21,057 --> 01:55:23,548 So he goes home, his dad goes, ''What happened? What happened? 1959 01:55:23,626 --> 01:55:27,084 ''Tell me! Tell me!'' He goes, ''Dad, l got a fuck for the duck, 1960 01:55:27,230 --> 01:55:28,754 ''l got a duck for the fuck, 1961 01:55:28,831 --> 01:55:30,594 ''and l got two bucks for a fucked-up duck!'' 1962 01:55:33,669 --> 01:55:34,897 So it's like a limerick. 1963 01:55:36,105 --> 01:55:37,333 You didn't think that was funny? 1964 01:55:37,807 --> 01:55:39,672 l thought it was entertaining at the end, sure, 1965 01:55:40,376 --> 01:55:42,139 the way all the words were put together, 1966 01:55:42,211 --> 01:55:43,769 but in terms of content? 1967 01:55:45,414 --> 01:55:46,506 No. 1968 01:55:49,719 --> 01:55:53,348 Get the check-check from Shen-Shen. Let's get out of here. 1969 01:55:58,561 --> 01:56:02,759 Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. 1970 01:56:03,232 --> 01:56:04,256 And cut.