Ah, the Savage Land,
a volcanic oasis smack dab in the middle of Antarctica.
Ms. Marvel, I'm happy to report that
SHIELD's incredibly remote monitoring station
is just the way I left it.
Sit tight, Captain America.
Mr. Fantastic and I are on our way.
With the Earth ready to leave the solar system
we've got to find the Super Hero Squad.
Yes, find the Squaddies...
in the other dimensions they were scattered to by the Dark Surfer.
SHIELD'S Savage Land satellite dish
is the only one in the world made of pure vibranium.
I'll de-polarize the ion exchanger at the base of the dish.
-Then I'll re-route the circuits...
Once I reverse the magnetic fields...
Did I ever tell you my Sputnik stories?
Seems like only yesterday that the Russians
were trying to put a Soviet satellite into space.
Oh, uh, Reed... uh, Dr. Richards,
someone's here. See you soon. Bye.
Oh, now you're in a big hurry, huh?
I ordered that pizza an hour ago.
-Baron Strucker.
Yes, Guten morgen, Herr Kapitan.
My morgen just took
a turnen for the worsen.
I said hold the anchovies.
Take him outside, my Hydra henchmen.
The jungle animals need their breakfast.
We could take off his mask. Find out who he is.
Nein! We have bigger schnitzel to fry, Hans.
In the name of Hydra,
we're about to take over the world!
But it won't be this world
because this one is getting too stinking cold!
With this Infinity Gauntlet,
I, Thanos, will rule the universe!
All right, Squaddies, time to Hero up!
Ah, this used to be such a nice dimension, Hans.
But then along comes this Dark Surfer,
and suddenly the Earth is thrown out of orbit.
Ja, and everyone's f-f-freezing now!
Ach, du Winter!
Ah, you see what happens when you give the good guys even an inch?
They go bad and then crowd us out!
But don't worry, Hans,
we'll use this dish to find another universe.
A nice, lush, warm place.
Ja, und no Dark Surfers allowed!
Ms. Marvel and Mr. Fantastic!
I'm prepared for this.
Guten morgen!
I mean, uh, good morning.
What's with the German accent?
Uh, too many history programs? Please, please, come in.
So, what is the purpose of this visit?
What's the purpose of that monocle you're wearing, Cap?
Contacts make my eyes itch.
Your turn.
Like you don't already know.
Mr. Fantastic needs a satellite dish.
Was? I mean, what?
I, uh...
I'm in the middle of maintenance.
Ja, ja, maintenance.
I'll put it this way: I order you to leave. Immediately!
-Hup! Hup! Huppen Sie, hup!
All right, what gave me away? Was it my German accent?
That, and a bad case of bratwurst breath.
Now, who are you really?
We are Hydra, she-doofus!
What did you call me?
I suppose that makes you Baron Strucker.
Boy, oh, boy,
that Mr. Fantastic is so smart.
Huh?
I'll make you smart. See what I did there?
Oh!
Everyone, retreat!
This won't keep them out for long.
We need a barricade.
Our plane is a few kilometers from here, Baron.
We can be at Hydra Island faster than you can say,
"My strudel just bit me."
Look at me.
Do you think I'm going to let
a woman and some rubber man drive me away?
No, Hans, they're about to find out why
we're called Hydra!
Huh?
Oh, for the love of... Where's my monocle?
Has anyone seen my monocle?
Careful where you are stepping.
We are 50 miles from the nearest lens...
The antimatter coil isn't reacting to
the ion exchanger's de-polarization.
How much longer?
I'm guessing it'll be ready
toward the end of the episode.
Dang! The station's surrounded.
Where'd they all come from?
Just like the mythical Hydra.
Cut off one head, and two grow back.
Then don't cut off their heads!
Dad, I've tried drinking milk shakes.
I can't break 90 pounds.
Aw, Dad, all the other fellas have zoot suits.
Hey-o!
Nice pussycat... Smilodon.
He's not a smilodon, he's a laughadon!
Hey, who are you anyway tabby?
Don't you recognize Zabu?
Ha. Well, then maybe you recognize your old friend Ka-Zar.
Whew. Just the ape-man
and prehistoric cat I wanted to see.
I did see the men you speak of,
but I thought they were friends of yours.
Friends of mine?
Well, they had masks.
Jungle buddy, some wear masks
to conceal their evil intent.
But don't worry, we'll do to them what we did to a certain
schnitzel-gobbler in Bastogne, back in '44.
Ka-Zar has no idea what you're talking about.
Whew.
Mr. Fantastic, hurry!
Doesn't anything ever rattle you?
They'll attack when they attack.
Attack!
Which is right now.
Attack!
Mien!
Hey, you punched me, but it hurt.
How are you holding up?
Little busy.
Too many of 'em!
Mr. Fantastic?
-Reed! -Soup's on!
We're going to need help.
Agreed. We only have so much soup.
They can't hold out forever. They can't!
But we can't, either!
That's where you're wrong, Hans.
That is the beauty of Hydra.
There are always more of us!
Joachim! Heinz! Fritz!
Join the others down by the station.
Und you, Harvey.
No!
You'll be forward observer, yeah?
Go climb the highest tree you can find.
Um, shouldn't we have held some in reserve?
Who needs reserves, Hans?
We're Hydra.
Is this high enough?
Oh, this is furry tree.
Ahh, kitty!
Oh, does not feel good.
That's one down.
-How many to go? -Hard to say.
Legend has it that whenever you cut off one of the Hydra's heads,
two will grow back.
Ha! That's impossible.
Not even one would grow back.
I'll show you.
No, no, Ka-Zar. That's all right.
All right, let's go.
Is everyone ready? Joachim?
Ja, Herr Baron.
Heinz?
Ja, he's ready.
Gut, gut. Harvey?
Harvey?
Not answering? We'll just get another.
Oh, not this time, Hans. I have a bad feeling.
What's taking Reed so long?
And why haven't they attacked yet?
Aw, what Hulk mess up now?
-Was that? -Not exactly.
What up with home?
Hulk!
He's not really here.
The tesseracts are misaligned.
He can't see or hear us.
Frankly, I'm stumped.
Dumb hole.
This tree has a perfect view of the station.
If I know Hydra, another one of their operatives will be along any minute.
Zabu, come!
Zabu? Zabu!
So it has a name. Zabu?
Zabu!
What have you masked men
done to Ka-Zar's best friend?
Hold it, Ka-Zar. Those are energy blasters.
Surrender, both of you,
or I'll throw him into a deadly tiger pit.
Which also works on...
whatever this hairy beast is.
Smilodon.
You know, Kaz, I know a fella who used to work in the circus.
Maybe he could get you another one.
It's not the same.
You're right.
I never thought I'd say this,
but there is a life at stake.
Captain America... surrenders.
Hulk head feel funny.
Aw, what Hulk mess up now?
I thought I had it.
Maybe you should step away
from it for a while. Find a distraction.
Ms. Marvel! Mr. Fantastic!
Hello?
Um, it's time to talk!
Why are we fighting, hmm?
Look, all we want is to move to a warmer dimension.
Then you can do what you want with your satellite dish.
What do you say?
You want me to let you invade
some unsuspecting dimension?
No way!
Oh, I hoped you'd say that.
You want us to use these three for target practice?
Sure, go ahead. But then what?
Ms. Marvel!
Shh. I know what I'm doing.
Then what?
Um, well, I...I haven't thought about that as such.
I mean, you are the good guys, so I just assumed...
You're taking quite a gamble.
I... That's it.
What's it?
The distraction I needed.
Really? Because I don't get...
Battle stations!
Put your hands near Zabu's mouth.
He'll chew through your ropes.
You first.
-How's it coming? -Much better.
I'm doing here what your bluff did to Strucker.
Really?
Rendering causation commutative.
Oh. That's good, right? 'Cause we're out of soup.
Yeah. Ha-ha! Hup-hup-hup-hup!
Now.
-This could be it.
Yellow Hair! Rubber-man!
Where home?
This is home, Hulk, you big lug.
Aww.
Hey, is it me,
or did somebody superheat ions to excite a vibranium dish
thereby forming an interdimensional portal?
Bingo!
Uh, what that mean?
It mean friends fixed what Dark Shiny did to us.
No, what "bingo" mean?
Huzzah!
What year is it?
-Whee!
Whew. About time.
"Bingo" means that after all we've been through,
I can get some rest now.
Get my joints lubricated and...
I've been waiting to say this:
Super Hero Squad, it's time to Hero up!
Have at you, villains!
Hi, remember us?
You know, super heroes?
Hulk missed dumb bad guys.
Hans! My seasick pills, quick!
I'm not Hans!
Ach du, Larry Lieber! Why do you always dress alike?
Whoo!
That's America to me, baby.
Ooh, tricky style points.
Hydra, retreat!
Come on, fellas! Hup, hup, ho!
Not a good idea, Cap.
There's a word for outlanders who go beyond this point:
lunch.
Owie!
How long has it been like this?
Pretty much since you left.
We're getting further away every day.
Brrr. Green Hulk turning blue.
The Dark Surfer did his best to get rid of us,
but we made it back.
Even with all his power
and all his Infinity stuff, he can be beaten.
So come on!
We're gonna get a new Helicarrier,
and then we're gonna Hero up
like we have never Heroed up before!
Good luck and Hero speed, my friends.
The world depends on what you do next.
Listen, if you happen to find a monocle, it...
Oh, never mind.