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Community
S04E06
Advanced Documentary Filmmaking
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(Dramatic music)
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My name is Kevin,
or so they tell me.
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Actually, they told me my
birth name is Benjamin Chang,
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but I can't remember anything
before six months ago.
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But by using
a special, shiny glass
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called a mirror,
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I've estimated
that I'm 15 years old,
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although I have no way
of knowing.
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Changnesia is a fascinating
and extremely rare disease
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on the forefront of the
psychological landscape.
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Dr. Kedan: Compared with your
garden variety amnesia,
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Changnesia is immeasurably
more complex.
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Its varied and seemingly
random symptoms,
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its resistance to both traditional
and new age medicine,
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why Changnesia
affects the memory
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but not the ability
to make forced puns...
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These are all things we can study
now that someone finally has it.
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I first met Chang when I hired him
as a Spanish teacher at Greendale.
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Then he became
a disgraced student,
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psychopathic music major,
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homeless vent dweller,
security guard, keytarist,
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power hungry warlord,
and now, Kevin.
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It's sad to see him like this.
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Well, it's mixed.
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He was pretty terrible before.
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I'm developing a theory
which some find controversial.
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Perhaps Chang
actually used to be Kevin,
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went crazy, and became Chang.
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And then, at some point,
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Chang hit his head,
went un-crazy,
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thereby reverting back
to regular old Kevin again.
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Dr. Kedan:
That makes no sense.
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Science tells us
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hitting his head
would only cure him
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if hitting his head
was the original cause.
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Told you it was controversial.
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Here at Greendale,
we accept all students,
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whoever they may be
or have forgotten they were.
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But assisting
in Kevin's recovery
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has put a financial strain
on the school.
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That's why we are appealing
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to the Macguffin Neurological Institute
for this $40,000 Grant,
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so we can continue to fight
this terrible disease
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and hopefully, one day,
pay for this documentary.
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How was that, Abed?
That's too beggy?
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Abed:
No, that was great.
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But I could use a new camera,
with a smoother zoom.
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Oh, okay. Well, just be sure
to get my good side, okay?
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This documentary
needs to be convincing.
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This needs to be the hoop dreams
of things people care about.
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We rolling?
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The dean
wants a propaganda film,
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but I intend to explore all
sides of this serious issue,
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including those who don't
think it's a serious issue.
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- Hey, Jeff.
- What are you doing?
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Making a documentary
on Changnesia.
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- You gotta be fucking kidding me.
- Abed: Got it. Beautiful.
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All right, let's get
one more for safety.
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Jeff, back to one.
Jeff?
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♪ Give me some rope
tie me to dream
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♪ give me the hope
to run out of steam
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♪ somebody said it can be here
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♪ we could be roped up,
tied up, dead in a year
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♪ I can't count the reasons
I should stay
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♪ one by one they all
just fade away ♪
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Sync and corrections by Norther
www.addic7ed.com
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I'm telling you, we should have
sprung for the name brand glitter.
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Look, cheap glitter,
expensive glitter.
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Money talks, people.
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Guys, did you hear?
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The history of ice cream class
had another heart attack.
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Three more, and we're all in.
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Yes.
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What's the Macguffin Institute?
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Pierce: Fine.
I'll tell him.
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But one day, you'll all be old
and slow and lose at things,
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and when that day comes,
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I won't remember
what I'm doing now.
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Lord, the Macguffin institute is
coming to Greendale on Friday
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because they might give the
school money to study Changnesia.
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Changnesia isn't a disease.
It's a con.
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You're seriously
helping this lunatic?
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He kept the dean in a dungeon.
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He tried to kill us.
He ate his twin in utero.
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That was Chang.
This is Kevin.
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They're the same idiot.
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How would you know? Have you ever
even spent any time with him, Jeff?
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I was reluctant to accept
Kevin at first, too, but...
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he's just so sweet.
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The world is brand new to him.
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He approaches everything
with the wonderment
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of a small child
or a cartoon alien.
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Whoa.
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This makes things smaller.
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No, no...
Bigger.
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Oh, bigger.
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Well, enjoy your collective delusion.
I'm going to go get a sandwich,
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which, unlike Changnesia,
is real.
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Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff,
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
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We want to know how you feel about
the Macguffin people visiting.
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I need it on camera.
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- It's stupid.
- What's stupid?
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- The whole thing.
- Okay, put it together for me.
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"The whole thing is stupid." All right,
thanks, buddy. I'll cut it together.
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(People talking indistinctly)
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- Shirley.
- Hmm?
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You don't seriously think
Chang is Kevin, do you?
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No, I believe the good lord made
Chang Chang. Kevin is a choice.
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Thank you. I'm seriously worried
about the rest of the group.
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Not only have they
drunk the Kevin kool-aid,
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they're in the study room right now,
making banners, debating glitter...
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Well, I'd love to keep talking about this,
but I gotta get to work.
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No, Shirley, you've got
to help me stop this.
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You're the only
sane person left.
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Welcome to Shirley's sandwiches,
where the food is Kevin-ly.
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- You hired Chang?
- Hmm?
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The customers love Kevin.
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I think it's because
he's a good listener.
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Most words are new to him, so
it's all still fascinating.
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I'm Kevin.
And you are?
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Not calling you Kevin.
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Hi, not calling you Kevin.
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What are you having?
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- None of this.
- Okay.
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Uh, listen.
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I don't care what he calls
himself, he's a hard worker.
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We're all broken people, Jeffrey,
we all deserve a second chance.
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Like how I gave Andre
a second chance.
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It doesn't mean I forgot.
I just forgave.
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Chang didn't sleep with a stripper.
He tried to kill us.
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Why does everyone keep
forgetting about that?
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But he didn't. And you used
to be a sleazy lawyer.
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What if Greendale never
gave you a second chance?
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Jeff: What Shirley said
really made me think.
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I mean, all my friends
believe this guy.
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What does it say about me
that I don't?
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(Knocking at door)
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Hmm?
Yes?
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Ugh, and cue wet blanket Winger
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to tell us that we're
all wasting our time.
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Actually, no.
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I had a really good
conversation with Shirley,
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and I realized
I've been acting like a jerk.
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If it's not too late,
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I'd love to help out
in any way I can.
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Jeffrey, that's amazing.
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I knew you'd come around.
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All right, Abed, get
us in panning singles.
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And can you say "powwow"
instead of "conversation"?
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It just sounds more you.
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All right, action. Okay, you going to
make an entrance? Great.
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What does it say?
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It says I have gullible friends
who will believe anybody,
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and I need
to make that anybody me.
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By exposing Chang
in front of the whole school.
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Abed: Wow. Much like the
classic documentary
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Capturing the Friedmans,
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my story just took a
completely unexpected turn.
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Jeff, if you want this done right,
I'm going to need a steadicam for Garrett.
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That's showbiz.
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(Shouts)
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(Crashes)
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Annie: We were all pretty
happy when Jeff came around.
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He became really gung-ho
about Abed's documentary,
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and had a lot of great ideas
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about how to impress
the Macguffin people.
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And that's why Pierce
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should host the reception.
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He speaks their language.
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Finally, somebody's
making some sense.
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I've got a blackface
senor Wences bit
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I've been workshopping.
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Perfect.
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Annie, we need to find out
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what happened to Kevin before
he showed up at Greendale.
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What hellish experiences did he
overcome during those missing months?
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Do you think you can use your forensic
knowhow to do some investigating?
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Investigating?
Obvi.
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Can I help?
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If you're willing to
learn, sure, partner.
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"Partner."
I like that.
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I'm going
to call you "Houlihan."
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"Partner" and "Houlihan."
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Jeff: Okay.
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The postman found Kevin here.
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He said he was soaking wet
and smelled like fish.
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I know it's not a lot
to go on...
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Um, it's almost
too much to go on.
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Look, Sullivan's trout farm
is just 1/4 mile away.
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Who do you think you're
dealing with, Winger?
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I don't know, Houlihan.
Seems sort of thin.
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In an investigation, one dude always
has to go opposite the other dude.
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That's how they
get things done.
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Well, you guys can work it out.
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- Yeah, we will.
- No, we won't.
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- Britta, Shirley...
- Shirley: Oh, that's me.
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I want you to take this camera
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and follow Chang around
for his day-to-day.
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Really get into the life of
a functioning Changnesiac.
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I want you to go
inside his home, work, pod.
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Just get everything.
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Ooh, that's great advertising
for my growing business.
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Okay, I'll do it. And with
my photography skills...
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Jeff, thank you.
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When the dean told me
you were going to help me,
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I couldn't believe it.
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A cool, smart lawyer
like yourself
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reaching out
to a little nobody like me?
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I never told you
I was a lawyer.
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No, you didn't.
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Shirley said it, remember?
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You said,
"You hired Chang?"
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And I said, "I'm
Kevin, and you are?"
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And you said,
"Not calling you Kevin,"
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and I said, "Hi, not calling you Kevin.
What are you having?"
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And you said,
"None of this."
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And then Shirley said, "I don't
care what he calls himself.
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"He's a hard worker.
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"We're all broken people, and
we all deserve a second chance.
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"Like how I gave Andre
a second chance.
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"Doesn't mean I forgot.
I just forgave."
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And you said, "Chang didn't
sleep with a stripper.
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"He tried to kill us.
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"Why does everyone keep
forgetting all that?"
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And then Shirley said,
"But he didn't.
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"And you used
to be a sleazy lawyer."
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Her words.
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Wow. That's quite a
memory you have.
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Well, my short term memory
has actually improved.
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My doctor calls it a, um...
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side effect.
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Jeff: Oh.
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Well played, Chang.
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The chess match has begun.
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What...
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I'm Chinese?
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Do you want to get some footage
while we're waiting for Kevin?
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Shirley: Maybe we could take some shots
of my delicious bread baking,
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or the affordable prices
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on our new Shirley's
sandwiches super saver menu.
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Or we could get to know the
Shirley behind the sandwiches.
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- Here, give me that camera.
- Oh. Okay.
244
00:09:15,449 --> 00:09:17,582
Be careful, now.
It's Abed's camera.
245
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:18,628
- All right.
- Watch it.
246
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:22,775
Britta: Oh, where is
the stop button on this?
247
00:09:22,792 --> 00:09:24,373
Oh, here it is.
Okay.
248
00:09:24,404 --> 00:09:25,821
- You want to hear my pitch?
- Mmm-hmm.
249
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:28,081
A strong, independent woman,
250
00:09:28,115 --> 00:09:29,613
starting her own business.
251
00:09:29,626 --> 00:09:32,326
An "entrepreneu-her,"
if you will.
252
00:09:32,354 --> 00:09:33,815
Or maybe a businesswoman?
253
00:09:33,833 --> 00:09:36,152
Okay, fine.
Think inside the box.
254
00:09:36,167 --> 00:09:38,212
All right.
Are you ready?
255
00:09:38,230 --> 00:09:40,330
- Mmm-hmm.
- Action.
256
00:09:41,625 --> 00:09:43,783
- (Whimpering)
- Cut. Oh! Beautiful.
257
00:09:43,814 --> 00:09:45,362
You don't think
the song was too much?
258
00:09:45,387 --> 00:09:47,760
Are you kidding me?
It made the scene.
259
00:09:47,791 --> 00:09:48,467
You know what?
260
00:09:48,492 --> 00:09:50,378
I want to get some better
lighting up in this noise.
261
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,691
Let's go hit up Abed.
262
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:53,618
I never told anybody
that story, Britta.
263
00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:55,404
Oh, it was beautiful.
264
00:09:55,414 --> 00:09:57,602
Shirley: I was dead
for three minutes.
265
00:09:57,614 --> 00:09:58,758
Britta: Three minutes?
266
00:09:58,764 --> 00:10:01,228
Shirley: Three whole minutes.
They thought I was gone.
267
00:10:01,394 --> 00:10:02,326
Pierce.
268
00:10:02,429 --> 00:10:03,558
How's your act coming?
269
00:10:03,588 --> 00:10:05,735
- Blackface senor Wences?
- Mmm-hmm.
270
00:10:05,883 --> 00:10:07,983
How do you think it's coming?
271
00:10:08,796 --> 00:10:09,659
(Laughing)
272
00:10:09,690 --> 00:10:10,859
In the unlikely event
273
00:10:10,876 --> 00:10:12,789
I fail to expose Chang,
274
00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:15,930
I'm pretty confident Pierce will
make sure we don't get a Grant.
275
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,736
What you talkin' about, hookey?
276
00:10:17,772 --> 00:10:20,556
Wow, that bit could not
get any more perfect.
277
00:10:20,569 --> 00:10:21,524
Wait a minute.
278
00:10:21,543 --> 00:10:25,326
I haven't introduced you
to my Asian wife yet.
279
00:10:25,911 --> 00:10:27,919
(High-pitched)
Uh-oh...
280
00:10:27,991 --> 00:10:29,032
I was wrong.
281
00:10:29,056 --> 00:10:31,440
(Humming)
282
00:10:32,548 --> 00:10:34,916
- This is the place.
- No, it's not.
283
00:10:34,955 --> 00:10:36,725
- (Sighs)
- (Sighs)
284
00:10:36,808 --> 00:10:38,002
(Dog barking)
285
00:10:38,033 --> 00:10:39,175
Garrett, here he comes. Get up.
286
00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:40,853
I can't.
It's too heavy!
287
00:10:40,878 --> 00:10:41,914
Garrett, now.
288
00:10:41,935 --> 00:10:42,866
Now.
289
00:10:42,994 --> 00:10:45,228
(Garrett breathing heavily)
290
00:10:45,730 --> 00:10:47,470
Excuse me,
Mr. Sullivan.
291
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:49,126
This is Houlihan.
I'm her partner, Partner.
292
00:10:49,151 --> 00:10:51,885
- Wait, I'm Partner.
- No, you're not.
293
00:10:52,399 --> 00:10:53,778
We'd like to ask you
a couple of questions.
294
00:10:53,804 --> 00:10:55,330
What are you, the trout police?
295
00:10:55,556 --> 00:10:58,347
Because if you are, you're legally bound
to tell me, or else it's entrapment.
296
00:10:58,377 --> 00:10:59,787
We're not the trout police.
297
00:10:59,814 --> 00:11:02,390
Have you seen this man?
298
00:11:03,789 --> 00:11:06,136
One morning, I see something
coming out of the trout tank,
299
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,122
and at first, I was scared,
because, uh, I'm the last face
300
00:11:09,134 --> 00:11:11,455
that a lot of trout ever see.
301
00:11:11,486 --> 00:11:14,224
I'm not saying that the
trout are a vengeful breed,
302
00:11:14,255 --> 00:11:15,865
but if they were, I...
303
00:11:16,171 --> 00:11:18,821
I'd probably be public enemy number one.
(Chuckles)
304
00:11:18,852 --> 00:11:21,816
So the figure that emerged,
it was that man?
305
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:24,634
Yeah, and I was pretty relieved when
I found out it was a naked Asian guy,
306
00:11:24,657 --> 00:11:25,970
and not an angry trout.
307
00:11:25,988 --> 00:11:27,151
And when was this?
308
00:11:27,213 --> 00:11:29,442
Oh, it must have been
around June.
309
00:11:29,466 --> 00:11:31,717
I remember because
my milkweed allergies
310
00:11:31,736 --> 00:11:33,565
were acting up
something fierce.
311
00:11:33,615 --> 00:11:37,188
I gave him some clothes, and sent
him on his way the next morning.
312
00:11:37,335 --> 00:11:38,854
I don't know what happened
to him after that.
313
00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:41,372
Mr. Sullivan, how many
employees do you have here?
314
00:11:41,428 --> 00:11:42,734
Employees?
315
00:11:42,797 --> 00:11:44,454
What do I look like,
trout world?
316
00:11:44,478 --> 00:11:45,597
(Laughs)
317
00:11:45,707 --> 00:11:47,738
No employees.
Heh, just me.
318
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:48,457
(Dog barking)
319
00:11:48,505 --> 00:11:49,496
And my dog.
320
00:11:50,342 --> 00:11:51,884
Annie: I knew he was
hiding something.
321
00:11:51,910 --> 00:11:53,505
A spike in production in June,
322
00:11:53,524 --> 00:11:55,800
at the peak
of milkweed allergy season?
323
00:11:55,824 --> 00:11:59,951
Something on this trout farm was
starting to smell... wrong.
324
00:12:00,377 --> 00:12:03,209
The problem was, I didn't have
any way to make him talk.
325
00:12:03,437 --> 00:12:04,603
Or did I?
326
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:07,820
Well, looks like
everything checks out here.
327
00:12:07,826 --> 00:12:08,651
Right, Troy?
328
00:12:08,700 --> 00:12:11,823
No, Houlihan, I don't think
anything checks out here.
329
00:12:11,835 --> 00:12:14,275
No, don't fly off the handle, Partner.
330
00:12:14,295 --> 00:12:16,850
Oh, I will fly
off the handle, Houlihan.
331
00:12:16,877 --> 00:12:18,540
What the hell
are you talking about?
332
00:12:18,577 --> 00:12:19,876
I'm sorry,
Mr. Sullivan.
333
00:12:19,904 --> 00:12:22,675
Clearly, you have
nothing to hide.
334
00:12:22,710 --> 00:12:24,235
What are you hiding?
335
00:12:24,253 --> 00:12:25,555
Fine!
(Dog barking)
336
00:12:25,581 --> 00:12:26,795
You got me.
337
00:12:26,861 --> 00:12:29,492
I've been using that Asian
guy as unpaid, manual labor
338
00:12:29,504 --> 00:12:32,115
for three months before
I drove him into town.
339
00:12:32,141 --> 00:12:34,306
But he wanted me to!
340
00:12:34,609 --> 00:12:36,125
We were friends,
341
00:12:36,144 --> 00:12:40,197
and I treated him
with respect and dignity.
342
00:12:40,494 --> 00:12:42,311
Partner and Houlihan.
343
00:12:42,323 --> 00:12:43,272
(Dog barking)
344
00:12:43,297 --> 00:12:44,328
Shut up, Kevin!
345
00:12:44,802 --> 00:12:47,168
Both: (Whispering)
Partner and Houlihan.
346
00:12:47,855 --> 00:12:48,861
Jeff: I don't understand.
347
00:12:48,886 --> 00:12:50,136
Why would he work for no money?
348
00:12:50,161 --> 00:12:51,364
Because he doesn't know
about money.
349
00:12:51,390 --> 00:12:53,789
Kevin doesn't know about labor
laws, or 40-hour work weeks,
350
00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:55,633
or that that dude named him
after a dog.
351
00:12:55,657 --> 00:12:57,233
Growing up,
I had a cat named Troy,
352
00:12:57,258 --> 00:12:59,648
a bird named Troy,
and a hamster named Troy.
353
00:12:59,938 --> 00:13:02,138
They were all older than me.
354
00:13:02,870 --> 00:13:04,058
Oh, my God.
355
00:13:04,084 --> 00:13:07,899
I think Kevin's struggle just
got a lot sexier, Grant-wise.
356
00:13:07,919 --> 00:13:09,860
This is horrible.
357
00:13:10,284 --> 00:13:11,717
Jeff: It was horrible.
358
00:13:11,995 --> 00:13:13,864
They were supposed to
come back with a smoking gun,
359
00:13:13,889 --> 00:13:15,887
and all they found was a
little human rights abuse.
360
00:13:15,915 --> 00:13:17,620
Which, normally, is terrible.
361
00:13:17,646 --> 00:13:18,834
Abed: So do you
believe Kevin now?
362
00:13:18,852 --> 00:13:20,723
No.
I want all your footage.
363
00:13:20,757 --> 00:13:22,191
I know Chang slipped up.
364
00:13:22,216 --> 00:13:24,461
He's not smart enough
to play dumb all the time.
365
00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:26,054
What about
Shirley and Britta's footage?
366
00:13:26,073 --> 00:13:27,085
It's unusable crap.
367
00:13:27,117 --> 00:13:28,459
I don't care.
I want it all.
368
00:13:28,478 --> 00:13:29,910
Do you want it bad enough
to rent me a crane?
369
00:13:29,932 --> 00:13:31,442
And maybe license
an expensive song?
370
00:13:31,467 --> 00:13:32,824
Yeah, whatever.
371
00:13:33,314 --> 00:13:35,816
♪ The itsy-bitsy spider
372
00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:39,849
♪ went up the water spout
373
00:13:42,966 --> 00:13:45,381
unusable crap is generous.
374
00:13:46,233 --> 00:13:47,748
It goes on like this
for another 12 hours.
375
00:13:47,773 --> 00:13:50,746
I couldn't even get through it all,
and I sat through The Tree of Life.
376
00:13:52,806 --> 00:13:54,867
Wait, right there.
What's that?
377
00:13:56,058 --> 00:13:58,698
Oh, come on,
you slippery snake, slip up.
378
00:13:58,717 --> 00:13:59,787
Doubtful.
When he's alone,
379
00:13:59,793 --> 00:14:03,495
he mostly just practices smiling
and frowning. We've all done it.
380
00:14:10,132 --> 00:14:11,620
(Phone dialing)
381
00:14:11,648 --> 00:14:12,983
Abed: Who's he calling?
382
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,901
Jeff: Good question.
383
00:14:15,591 --> 00:14:16,791
We figure that out,
384
00:14:16,820 --> 00:14:18,717
we've got our smoking gun.
385
00:14:19,035 --> 00:14:20,480
And all thanks to Britta.
386
00:14:20,505 --> 00:14:22,138
Don't ruin this.
387
00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:25,226
Abed: The stage was set for
a climatic final set piece.
388
00:14:25,263 --> 00:14:26,891
The Macguffin people
were on campus,
389
00:14:26,910 --> 00:14:29,233
and Jeff had prepared
quite the presentation.
390
00:14:29,241 --> 00:14:30,942
(High-pitched gibberish)
391
00:14:30,966 --> 00:14:32,017
You shut up.
392
00:14:32,036 --> 00:14:33,104
(High-pitched)
But I love you.
393
00:14:33,142 --> 00:14:35,020
You get yourself in the kitchen,
and make me a burrito.
394
00:14:35,039 --> 00:14:37,450
Oh, okay, yay!
Oh, thank you.
395
00:14:37,465 --> 00:14:39,144
Okay, thank you,
Pierce Hawthorne
396
00:14:39,157 --> 00:14:42,769
for your special blend
of playful racial humor.
397
00:14:42,796 --> 00:14:45,800
Pelton: And genuine thoughts
on Geraldine ferraro.
398
00:14:45,812 --> 00:14:47,236
(Chuckles)
He's an old Teddy bear.
399
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:50,283
And now, I believe Jeff
Winger has a presentation.
400
00:14:50,318 --> 00:14:52,184
- Yay.
- Ugh.
401
00:14:53,221 --> 00:14:55,332
Thank you.
I must confess,
402
00:14:55,345 --> 00:14:58,217
I was just a short while
ago quite skeptical
403
00:14:58,242 --> 00:14:59,599
about Changnesia.
404
00:14:59,610 --> 00:15:00,671
But, with the help
of my friends,
405
00:15:00,687 --> 00:15:03,443
we have uncovered a lot
about this terrible,
406
00:15:03,482 --> 00:15:06,651
newly-discovered,
completely real disease.
407
00:15:06,657 --> 00:15:09,622
I think you'll find it
as eye-opening as I did.
408
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:11,065
Wait till you see
what we found.
409
00:15:11,096 --> 00:15:13,414
Kevin was a victim
of human trafficking.
410
00:15:13,592 --> 00:15:17,577
Our purpose here tonight
is to help cure Kevin
411
00:15:17,614 --> 00:15:19,175
of his Changnesia.
412
00:15:19,228 --> 00:15:21,177
Who better to jog his memory
413
00:15:21,190 --> 00:15:24,395
than someone special from
his allegedly erased past.
414
00:15:24,535 --> 00:15:29,817
So please welcome to the stage
the former Mrs. Ben Chang, Alessandra.
415
00:15:29,841 --> 00:15:31,321
Alessandra, come on up.
416
00:15:31,346 --> 00:15:32,745
Thank you.
417
00:15:37,018 --> 00:15:38,492
Ben...
418
00:15:38,773 --> 00:15:40,607
do you remember me?
419
00:15:42,615 --> 00:15:44,224
I'm sorry.
420
00:15:45,613 --> 00:15:46,814
I don't.
421
00:15:46,831 --> 00:15:47,807
Admit it, Kevin.
422
00:15:47,844 --> 00:15:49,167
You remember her.
423
00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:52,140
This is the woman
you never stopped loving.
424
00:15:52,165 --> 00:15:53,865
Hit the lights!
425
00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:57,856
(Phone dialing on screen)
426
00:15:59,099 --> 00:16:00,933
(All gasp)
427
00:16:05,636 --> 00:16:06,436
Oh...
428
00:16:06,473 --> 00:16:08,464
You love her so much,
429
00:16:08,495 --> 00:16:12,211
you called her over and
over and over again,
430
00:16:12,234 --> 00:16:13,749
even though you don't know her
431
00:16:13,772 --> 00:16:16,941
or how to use a phone
or what a number is.
432
00:16:17,035 --> 00:16:18,067
(All gasp)
433
00:16:18,632 --> 00:16:19,960
Alessandra:
What's going on here?
434
00:16:19,991 --> 00:16:21,501
You told me
I was here to help him.
435
00:16:21,526 --> 00:16:23,823
Oh, we are here
to help him, all right.
436
00:16:23,976 --> 00:16:28,775
We are here to help him admit that he
has been faking this whole time.
437
00:16:28,793 --> 00:16:30,376
Where'd you get
the number, Chang?
438
00:16:30,382 --> 00:16:32,213
I found it in the vents!
439
00:16:33,107 --> 00:16:35,342
It's 555-0190.
440
00:16:36,316 --> 00:16:38,883
And it was the most beautiful
thing I'd ever seen.
441
00:16:39,204 --> 00:16:41,596
But I always hung up,
because...
442
00:16:42,451 --> 00:16:44,034
I didn't know if the
person on the other end
443
00:16:44,059 --> 00:16:46,128
would ever want
to talk to Kevin...
444
00:16:46,867 --> 00:16:48,434
after knowing Chang.
445
00:16:48,491 --> 00:16:50,024
You seem so nice.
446
00:16:50,170 --> 00:16:51,761
If we were really married,
447
00:16:52,215 --> 00:16:55,297
I wish I could remember for even
one moment how lucky I was.
448
00:16:55,322 --> 00:16:56,642
- Oh...
- Aw...
449
00:16:56,654 --> 00:16:58,190
Oh, Ben.
450
00:16:58,400 --> 00:16:59,903
(Giggling)
451
00:16:59,926 --> 00:17:00,608
Uh!
452
00:17:00,625 --> 00:17:01,488
(Thuds)
(All gasp)
453
00:17:01,506 --> 00:17:02,884
Jeffrey, what are you doing?
454
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:06,076
Look, if he doesn't remember her,
then this wouldn't bother him.
455
00:17:06,087 --> 00:17:07,854
My logic is flawless!
456
00:17:07,905 --> 00:17:09,604
(All shriek, shocked chatter)
457
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:12,270
Doesn't that bother you?
That bothers you!
458
00:17:12,295 --> 00:17:13,088
Abed: Things got so ugly,
459
00:17:13,091 --> 00:17:14,848
I hesitate to even
show you this footage.
460
00:17:14,866 --> 00:17:16,615
But I will let you see
me reacting to it.
461
00:17:16,646 --> 00:17:18,842
That'll probably be
more than you can handle.
462
00:17:20,850 --> 00:17:22,402
(Shocked chatter)
463
00:17:22,432 --> 00:17:23,832
Mmm...
464
00:17:25,972 --> 00:17:28,506
Actually, it's not that bad,
but this keeps the story moving.
465
00:17:29,453 --> 00:17:30,548
Hey, Alessandra,
466
00:17:30,554 --> 00:17:33,050
his last girlfriend
was a charred mannequin leg!
467
00:17:33,074 --> 00:17:34,979
Jeffrey!
Have you lost your mind?
468
00:17:35,079 --> 00:17:36,224
You never believed Kevin?
469
00:17:36,242 --> 00:17:39,186
You were just lying to manipulate
us into helping you hurt him?
470
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,397
Jeffrey, I trusted you
and believed in you
471
00:17:41,423 --> 00:17:44,083
and fantasized about celebrating
over mimosas with you!
472
00:17:44,108 --> 00:17:46,621
Dean, if this is the sort
of uphill battle
473
00:17:46,630 --> 00:17:48,856
you're facing in the fight
against Changnesia,
474
00:17:48,879 --> 00:17:51,224
well, then, you're gonna need
all the help you can get.
475
00:17:51,243 --> 00:17:53,995
On behalf of the Macguffin
neurological institute,
476
00:17:54,020 --> 00:17:55,917
Grant granted.
(All exclaim)
477
00:17:55,943 --> 00:17:58,210
(Excited chatter)
478
00:17:59,824 --> 00:18:02,097
Jeff: So...
I guess I did help.
479
00:18:02,133 --> 00:18:04,349
Just not in the way
I wanted to.
480
00:18:04,532 --> 00:18:05,630
But, on the bright side,
481
00:18:05,648 --> 00:18:08,216
this is the most well-documented
failure of my life.
482
00:18:08,246 --> 00:18:10,613
(Indistinct chatter)
483
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:12,295
(Cheers and applause)
484
00:18:12,307 --> 00:18:13,272
Thank you.
485
00:18:13,870 --> 00:18:15,947
Jeff: By trying to make
Kevin a pariah,
486
00:18:16,027 --> 00:18:17,508
I accidentally
became more Chang
487
00:18:17,527 --> 00:18:19,705
than Chang at his Changiest.
488
00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:21,216
(Laughs)
489
00:18:21,234 --> 00:18:22,591
That's funny.
490
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,023
Well, I didn't try
to kill anyone.
491
00:18:25,221 --> 00:18:26,638
Which no one
seems to care about.
492
00:18:26,667 --> 00:18:28,233
But you know what I'm saying.
493
00:18:28,309 --> 00:18:30,172
(Indistinct chatter)
494
00:18:30,266 --> 00:18:31,966
Can I sit here?
495
00:18:33,393 --> 00:18:35,641
You sure you want
to be seen with me?
496
00:18:35,978 --> 00:18:37,807
You have a brand-new
reputation to uphold.
497
00:18:37,831 --> 00:18:39,334
(Chuckles)
498
00:18:39,730 --> 00:18:41,251
I like you.
499
00:18:41,333 --> 00:18:42,422
Really?
500
00:18:42,700 --> 00:18:45,008
Even after
everything I did to...
501
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:47,031
Whoever you are?
502
00:18:47,238 --> 00:18:48,738
(Chuckles)
Okay, I get it.
503
00:18:48,777 --> 00:18:50,988
Changnesia's hard
to understand.
504
00:18:51,157 --> 00:18:52,999
At least, that's what
people tell me.
505
00:18:53,042 --> 00:18:54,414
Now, I don't know
a thing about it,
506
00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:58,086
which apparently is one of the symptoms,
and it's so frustrating.
507
00:18:59,904 --> 00:19:03,407
Look, I know Chang
was a bad guy.
508
00:19:03,657 --> 00:19:07,520
So he probably deserved
everything you did to him.
509
00:19:07,567 --> 00:19:09,284
But you're not a bad guy.
510
00:19:09,302 --> 00:19:11,108
You just made a mistake.
511
00:19:12,251 --> 00:19:15,176
And I'm willing to start
over fresh if you are.
512
00:19:17,049 --> 00:19:18,549
Hi.
513
00:19:18,596 --> 00:19:20,029
My name's Kevin.
514
00:19:20,777 --> 00:19:22,765
Jeff: I'm not saying
I believe him.
515
00:19:22,802 --> 00:19:27,207
But I have got an idea of what
it feels like to be Chang.
516
00:19:27,462 --> 00:19:28,983
Wanting to leave
that name behind
517
00:19:28,989 --> 00:19:31,423
is the sanest decision
anyone can make.
518
00:19:31,665 --> 00:19:34,132
(New radicals'
you get what you give)
519
00:19:35,563 --> 00:19:37,030
♪ 1, 2
520
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:37,879
Hi.
521
00:19:37,904 --> 00:19:39,182
♪ 1, 2, 3
522
00:19:39,253 --> 00:19:41,052
I'm Jeff.
523
00:19:43,784 --> 00:19:47,587
♪ But when the night is falling
524
00:19:47,899 --> 00:19:51,800
♪ you cannot find the light
525
00:19:51,828 --> 00:19:53,028
all: Aw.
526
00:19:53,051 --> 00:19:53,845
Thanks.
527
00:19:53,870 --> 00:19:55,968
A lot of filmmakers use crane
shots to elicit emotion.
528
00:19:55,985 --> 00:19:57,383
What the heck, Abed?
529
00:19:57,402 --> 00:19:59,882
You knew what Jeffrey was
planning to do the whole time?
530
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:01,406
Why can't you ever
make a documentary
531
00:20:01,412 --> 00:20:03,410
about the thing you plan
to make a documentary about?
532
00:20:03,422 --> 00:20:05,121
Don't censor him!
533
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:06,581
Censorship.
(Gasps)
534
00:20:06,612 --> 00:20:08,714
- This is the documentary.
- Ugh.
535
00:20:08,731 --> 00:20:10,814
Abed, you gotta teach me
how to use that camera.
536
00:20:10,832 --> 00:20:12,137
(Imitates gunshot)
537
00:20:13,122 --> 00:20:15,524
Guys... I'm sorry.
538
00:20:15,758 --> 00:20:17,591
I really screwed up.
539
00:20:17,711 --> 00:20:19,811
I hope you can forgive me.
540
00:20:19,908 --> 00:20:21,407
Already forgotten.
541
00:20:21,456 --> 00:20:22,355
(Laughter)
Oh...
542
00:20:22,369 --> 00:20:23,225
(Laughter continues)
543
00:20:23,239 --> 00:20:24,789
- Shirley: Kevin...
- What are we laughing about?
544
00:20:24,819 --> 00:20:26,867
- Jeff: Oh, Kevin.
- All: Kevin...
545
00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:27,692
(Laughter)
546
00:20:27,699 --> 00:20:29,387
- Adorable.
- Good job.
547
00:20:29,456 --> 00:20:31,056
I don't get it.
548
00:20:31,246 --> 00:20:33,147
(Chuckles)
549
00:20:38,087 --> 00:20:40,021
(Haunting music)
550
00:20:40,042 --> 00:20:41,342
(Dialing phone)
551
00:20:41,373 --> 00:20:42,706
Hi, it's me.
552
00:20:42,968 --> 00:20:44,705
They all finally bought it.
553
00:20:44,762 --> 00:20:46,962
Hook, line, and Winger.
554
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,535
I patiently await
your further instructions.
555
00:20:49,596 --> 00:20:51,699
Chang out.
556
00:20:52,202 --> 00:20:53,969
(Chuckling)
557
00:20:54,293 --> 00:20:55,793
(Cackling maniacally)
558
00:20:55,988 --> 00:20:58,789
Why did I do that?
Man...
559
00:20:58,936 --> 00:21:01,604
(Cackling maniacally)
560
00:21:05,204 --> 00:21:10,204
Sync and corrections by Norther
www.addic7ed.com