1 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:06,480 No. 2 00:00:06,550 --> 00:00:08,580 Has it been a year already? 3 00:00:08,620 --> 00:00:11,650 ♪ You're a grand old flag, you're a high-flying flag ♪ 4 00:00:11,690 --> 00:00:15,150 ♪ And forever in peace may you wave ♪ 5 00:00:15,220 --> 00:00:17,390 We love the Fourth of July. 6 00:00:17,430 --> 00:00:18,630 It's the perfect holiday. 7 00:00:18,660 --> 00:00:22,330 You get to cook outside, blow stuff up, wear shorts. 8 00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:23,800 Easter should be taking notes. 9 00:00:23,830 --> 00:00:27,830 ♪ Keep your eyes on the grand old flag ♪ 10 00:00:27,870 --> 00:00:29,540 That was longer than I remember. 11 00:00:30,670 --> 00:00:32,070 Hello? 12 00:00:32,110 --> 00:00:35,780 Joe, you should be thankful that you live in this country. 13 00:00:35,810 --> 00:00:39,280 I spent half of my childhood in a Banana Republic. 14 00:00:39,310 --> 00:00:42,180 It was the only store in my village that had air-conditioner. 15 00:00:42,340 --> 00:00:43,970 Yes, Mr. President. 16 00:00:44,010 --> 00:00:46,210 Yes, sir, I'd be honored to, sir. Thank you. 17 00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:47,980 Amazing news. 18 00:00:48,010 --> 00:00:50,440 The grand marshal for today's parade just got #MeToo'd, 19 00:00:50,480 --> 00:00:51,810 and they need me to fill in. 20 00:00:51,850 --> 00:00:54,750 Jay, I'm so happy for you! 21 00:00:54,780 --> 00:00:56,980 So, now the only thing left on your bucket list 22 00:00:57,020 --> 00:00:59,120 is to bare-knuckle fight a Russian! 23 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:00,590 Ay! 24 00:01:00,620 --> 00:01:02,760 And Manny's gonna be back home 25 00:01:02,790 --> 00:01:05,960 from his big road trip just in time for the parade. 26 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:08,330 He's been gone for so long. I can't wait to see him. 27 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:09,460 That's great! 28 00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:11,210 We'll have the whole family back together with me 29 00:01:11,230 --> 00:01:13,230 to ride in the convertible LeBaron. 30 00:01:13,270 --> 00:01:15,120 Joe, how's your parade wave? 31 00:01:15,370 --> 00:01:16,770 We'll work on it. 32 00:01:17,010 --> 00:01:18,270 ♪ Every heart beats true ♪ 33 00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:19,710 ♪ For the red, white, and blue ♪ 34 00:01:19,740 --> 00:01:21,170 ♪ Where there's never a... ♪ 35 00:01:21,210 --> 00:01:26,210 Modern Family Season 10 Episode 01 36 00:01:26,210 --> 00:01:28,210 "I Love a Parade" == resynced by Brach_Movic aka GilangPC == 37 00:01:35,090 --> 00:01:36,260 More! 38 00:01:38,030 --> 00:01:40,590 Yeah. I've got time to help you. 39 00:01:40,630 --> 00:01:42,500 Look at your cousin being so sweet 40 00:01:42,530 --> 00:01:43,760 and helping out a friend. 41 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,530 Such a weak little coward. Are we done yet? 42 00:01:47,970 --> 00:01:50,070 No. It's a really big bridge. 43 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,370 Or maybe you're just a really tiny man. 44 00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:55,580 Things were going great on my cross-country drive 45 00:01:55,610 --> 00:01:57,310 until I fell behind schedule 46 00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:59,910 after I developed a perfectly rational, fact-based fear 47 00:01:59,950 --> 00:02:02,430 of driving over bridges. 48 00:02:02,450 --> 00:02:04,500 I called Cam for support since he taught driver's ed, 49 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:06,920 - but he wasn't around. - What? 50 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,490 Turns out a strong verbal lashing 51 00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:11,060 was exactly what I needed to get me across that bridge 52 00:02:11,090 --> 00:02:13,730 and the many others that cover this country like a cancer. 53 00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:16,860 Okay, Cal. Let's say hi to Mommy. 54 00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:18,200 - Say, "Hi, Mommy!" - Whoa, whoa. 55 00:02:18,230 --> 00:02:20,570 if I'm in that shot, back up a-and turn the lights down. 56 00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:22,900 We had Chinese food last night. I look like a blowfish. 57 00:02:22,940 --> 00:02:24,720 Okay, you know what, Mitchell? It's not about you. 58 00:02:24,740 --> 00:02:27,370 I promised we would send a video of Cal 59 00:02:27,410 --> 00:02:29,640 to my sister for her birthday, 60 00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:32,610 and that was a week ago, so we got to get it done. 61 00:02:32,650 --> 00:02:36,220 We have been watching my big-for-his-age nephew Cal 62 00:02:36,250 --> 00:02:37,720 while my sister Pameron is... 63 00:02:37,750 --> 00:02:39,690 is back in Missouri paying off a little debt. 64 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,090 To society. She's in prison. 65 00:02:41,120 --> 00:02:42,520 For a tiny parole violation. 66 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:43,840 She tried something on in a store 67 00:02:43,860 --> 00:02:44,970 and accidentally walked out. 68 00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:46,560 It was another woman's purse. 69 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:48,130 The silver lining is, 70 00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:51,400 Cal is benefiting from our parenting experience. 71 00:02:51,430 --> 00:02:53,770 Mitchell is molding young Cal's brain 72 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:56,440 while I handle the young boy's body. 73 00:02:56,470 --> 00:02:57,940 It's a miracle we're not in prison. 74 00:02:57,970 --> 00:02:59,070 Yeah. 75 00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:01,810 Okay, let's sing the alphabet for Mommy. 76 00:03:01,840 --> 00:03:03,480 Come on, you and I worked on this. 77 00:03:04,950 --> 00:03:06,280 6! 78 00:03:06,310 --> 00:03:08,230 You know, I think I put so much information in there, 79 00:03:08,250 --> 00:03:09,760 it's getting jumbled up on the way out. 80 00:03:09,790 --> 00:03:11,300 Well, let's... let's do some of your stuff. 81 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:12,360 Throw him a ball or something. 82 00:03:12,390 --> 00:03:14,320 Okay, yeah. That's a great idea. 83 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:16,320 Okay, on the count of 3, Cal. 84 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,660 Are you ready? 1, 2, 3! 85 00:03:18,690 --> 00:03:20,160 Okay. 86 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,590 All right, um... well, hugs! 87 00:03:21,630 --> 00:03:23,730 Hey, how about a hug? 88 00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:26,430 Aww. He is such a good hugger. 89 00:03:26,470 --> 00:03:27,500 Okay, here's the thing... 90 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,170 football camp started when Cal came. 91 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:30,340 Then I was laid up 92 00:03:30,370 --> 00:03:32,240 because of that dinner at Absolutely Crabulous. 93 00:03:32,270 --> 00:03:34,970 Well, don't worry. I've been slacking on my end, too. 94 00:03:35,010 --> 00:03:37,580 Yeah, but I've been telling Pam that Cal is thriving here. 95 00:03:37,610 --> 00:03:40,610 We can't send her a video of him reciting his AB6s! 96 00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:43,850 - I wonder... - Go on. I'm in. 97 00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:45,890 Is it possible to shoot him in a way 98 00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:47,790 that makes him look better than he is? 99 00:03:47,820 --> 00:03:49,700 Honey, are you kidding? Vin Diesel's a movie star. 100 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:51,040 Anything's possible with editing. 101 00:03:54,430 --> 00:03:55,560 What do you got there? 102 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,100 Just choosing some classes for college. 103 00:03:58,130 --> 00:03:59,630 This one looks interesting. 104 00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:02,870 "In this intensive"... Nope. 105 00:04:02,900 --> 00:04:05,440 Drop that! 106 00:04:05,470 --> 00:04:07,110 Game day, buddy. 107 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:09,510 For the first time ever, Luke and I are taking part 108 00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:12,410 in the sport of kings, the savory science. 109 00:04:12,450 --> 00:04:14,910 We're teamed in a parent/child hot-dog-eating contest. 110 00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:17,030 We've been training for weeks, and I'm proud to say that Luke, 111 00:04:17,050 --> 00:04:20,390 like his old man, is blessed with a dogger's mouth. 112 00:04:20,420 --> 00:04:22,220 I felt something tear inside. 113 00:04:22,260 --> 00:04:23,620 Push through it. 114 00:04:23,660 --> 00:04:26,090 You'll thank me when you start to feel the gorger's high. 115 00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:32,400 Aah! What the hell?! 116 00:04:32,430 --> 00:04:34,200 Is the hot dog making you angry? 117 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,970 An angry stomach is 12% larger. Boo! 118 00:04:37,010 --> 00:04:38,610 I think we've got a real shot 119 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:40,510 to take down Rhonda and Thandie Hodak. 120 00:04:40,540 --> 00:04:41,740 But they're undefeated. 121 00:04:41,780 --> 00:04:43,980 I guess that makes us "under-dogs." 122 00:04:44,010 --> 00:04:46,380 How long you been sitting on that one? 123 00:04:46,410 --> 00:04:48,580 Not as long as you've been sitting on that couch. 124 00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:49,750 Hey, hey. 125 00:04:49,780 --> 00:04:51,320 Can I get in on that floor bagel? 126 00:04:51,350 --> 00:04:54,320 Alex decided to take off some time earlier this summer, 127 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:56,390 and, like everything else she does, 128 00:04:56,420 --> 00:04:58,020 she did it a little too well. 129 00:04:59,530 --> 00:05:02,030 Who's there? Did you bring food? 130 00:05:02,060 --> 00:05:03,630 Tomatoes. 131 00:05:03,670 --> 00:05:05,830 But they won't be ready for six weeks. 132 00:05:05,870 --> 00:05:07,200 You have a backup? 133 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:08,670 Well, I fell asleep on my phone, 134 00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:11,070 and I think my face ordered another one. 135 00:05:12,210 --> 00:05:14,070 You know, do you want to join me? 136 00:05:14,110 --> 00:05:15,390 You go back to work in a few weeks. 137 00:05:15,410 --> 00:05:17,180 You'll regret it if you don't relax a little. 138 00:05:17,210 --> 00:05:19,110 Okay. Sure. 139 00:05:19,150 --> 00:05:21,410 The... This can wait 10 minutes 140 00:05:21,450 --> 00:05:24,880 until I get him into the ground, right? 141 00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:28,290 Can you scratch my nose? I feel like you're closer. 142 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:29,760 Okay, up on the table 143 00:05:29,790 --> 00:05:32,690 for a little stomach massage and heckler prep. 144 00:05:32,730 --> 00:05:34,930 Hey, gals, things haven't been going that great 145 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,830 between me and Arvin, and he's stopping by 146 00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:38,870 to say goodbye before leaving for Switzerland. 147 00:05:38,900 --> 00:05:40,270 Could you take off the onesies 148 00:05:40,300 --> 00:05:42,540 and make it look like we don't live in an insane asylum? 149 00:05:42,570 --> 00:05:45,440 You suck! You eat like a moron! 150 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:47,810 My God! It's like you want Arvin 151 00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:50,280 to throw his return ticket off an Alp! 152 00:05:50,310 --> 00:05:52,350 No wonder she's so stressed. 153 00:05:52,380 --> 00:05:54,310 She's wearing, like, a seven-sie. 154 00:05:57,850 --> 00:06:00,050 Haley. Fancy meeting you here. 155 00:06:00,090 --> 00:06:02,220 Wait, why? I-I live here. 156 00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:04,790 No, I-I know. I was... I was making a joke. 157 00:06:04,830 --> 00:06:05,960 It was stupid. 158 00:06:05,990 --> 00:06:07,960 No, it... it wasn't stupid. It was funny. 159 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,130 Well, you didn't laugh. 160 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,360 Well, do it again. I'll laugh this time. 161 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:12,770 I'd rather not. 162 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:14,970 Sorry. I'm just, um, a little... 163 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:18,390 I'm really nervous, and I feel like this goodbye 164 00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:19,660 has so much pressure on it. 165 00:06:19,690 --> 00:06:22,440 So let's just relax and be with each other. 166 00:06:23,670 --> 00:06:24,800 I actually have to go. 167 00:06:24,840 --> 00:06:27,210 No, seriously. 168 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:28,980 I misread my itinerary, 169 00:06:29,010 --> 00:06:31,180 and I have to get to the airport. 170 00:06:31,210 --> 00:06:33,080 No! So, this is it? 171 00:06:33,110 --> 00:06:34,650 This is goodbye? 172 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:36,320 I'm afraid so. 173 00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:37,380 I'm gonna miss you. 174 00:06:37,420 --> 00:06:38,520 I'll miss you, too. 175 00:06:38,550 --> 00:06:40,350 Aww. 176 00:06:40,390 --> 00:06:42,160 That's my car. I should probably... 177 00:06:42,190 --> 00:06:43,920 Okay. 178 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,970 Well... goodbye, Haley. 179 00:06:51,500 --> 00:06:52,830 Love you. 180 00:06:53,940 --> 00:06:55,640 Love you, too. 181 00:06:59,310 --> 00:07:00,310 Is he gone? 182 00:07:01,410 --> 00:07:02,880 - Yeah? - Good. 183 00:07:02,910 --> 00:07:04,510 No one wants old fuddy-duddy dad 184 00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:06,050 ruining the big romantic moment. 185 00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,150 I'll be upstairs hiding in Luke's closet. 186 00:07:11,770 --> 00:07:14,890 All right. There we go, Cal. Chew the peanut butter. 187 00:07:14,970 --> 00:07:16,780 See? Now, with editing, we can make it look like 188 00:07:16,810 --> 00:07:18,050 he's saying anything we want... 189 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,340 numbers, the alphabet, a joke about Jewish people. 190 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:21,400 Pam loves those. 191 00:07:21,630 --> 00:07:23,100 Movie tricks come easy to me... 192 00:07:23,130 --> 00:07:25,370 you know, clowns being naturals at deception. 193 00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:27,700 It's true... a couple months into dating, 194 00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:29,170 Cam told me he was a clown, 195 00:07:29,210 --> 00:07:30,840 did a little performance for me, 196 00:07:30,870 --> 00:07:32,570 and I... I did feel deceived. 197 00:07:33,940 --> 00:07:36,080 Okay, now, when I say "action," 198 00:07:36,110 --> 00:07:37,940 Cal's gonna throw me the ball. 199 00:07:37,980 --> 00:07:39,150 You're gonna walk backwards, 200 00:07:39,180 --> 00:07:40,650 and then in editing, I'll reverse it 201 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:42,260 to make it look like Cal's catching the ball 202 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:43,480 and you're walking normally. 203 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:44,820 Why am I even in it at all? 204 00:07:44,850 --> 00:07:46,970 Remind me of something, Mitchell... is the best art made 205 00:07:46,990 --> 00:07:50,560 by a million voices chiming in or one man with a single vision? 206 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:54,770 Okay, and we lay in the piano later. 207 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:59,000 ♪ Twinkle, twinkle, little star ♪ 208 00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:03,400 ♪ How I wonder what you are ♪ 209 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:04,860 - I have to pee! - He has to pee. 210 00:08:04,890 --> 00:08:05,950 - Okay, he has to pee. - Yep. 211 00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:07,700 All right. Take five! 212 00:08:08,770 --> 00:08:09,970 Lily, this is our first cut, 213 00:08:10,010 --> 00:08:12,940 so if you see anything wonky, let us know. 214 00:08:16,110 --> 00:08:17,510 Hello, Mommy. 215 00:08:17,550 --> 00:08:18,980 Happy birthday. 216 00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:21,950 1 plus 1 is 2. 217 00:08:21,990 --> 00:08:23,720 Simple math. 218 00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:25,950 I can catch a ball. 219 00:08:28,790 --> 00:08:30,530 How'd you miss the cat? 220 00:08:30,580 --> 00:08:32,680 I didn't. That take was your best walk. 221 00:08:38,190 --> 00:08:40,360 That is gold. 222 00:08:47,190 --> 00:08:48,660 Why the giant bottle of wine? 223 00:08:48,690 --> 00:08:51,290 It's for perspective, and nobody's asking that question. 224 00:08:51,330 --> 00:08:53,760 - Didn't I just ask it? - Cam. 225 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:56,030 Yeah, I know. It's certified rotten. 226 00:09:02,170 --> 00:09:03,610 Luke. 227 00:09:03,970 --> 00:09:05,950 He's only getting 1/3 of the dog on his first bite. 228 00:09:05,970 --> 00:09:07,950 Anything less than half, and you're playing for second. 229 00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:11,640 Well, the good news is, the Fourth is weeks away. 230 00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:12,850 Um... 231 00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:15,350 it's... it's today. 232 00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:17,520 Toda... June...? 233 00:09:17,550 --> 00:09:19,180 Yeah... gone. 234 00:09:21,180 --> 00:09:23,980 There you are! It's almost time for our show. 235 00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:26,210 - Wait... what are you wearing? - Clothes? 236 00:09:26,250 --> 00:09:27,360 I got to get back into school mode 237 00:09:27,380 --> 00:09:28,980 before I lose my edge. 238 00:09:29,020 --> 00:09:30,660 Mom, you might want to think about rejoining life 239 00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:32,480 before your brain freezes, too. 240 00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,420 Yeah, don't you worry about... 241 00:09:34,460 --> 00:09:35,490 me. 242 00:09:37,930 --> 00:09:39,090 What's that? 243 00:09:39,130 --> 00:09:40,960 Um... 244 00:09:40,990 --> 00:09:42,090 Listen. 245 00:09:43,260 --> 00:09:46,000 No dad wants to have this talk with his son, but... 246 00:09:46,030 --> 00:09:47,930 you're just not eating enough hot dogs. 247 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,700 I'm sorry. 248 00:09:49,740 --> 00:09:52,700 For some reason, I just... I can't focus. 249 00:09:53,270 --> 00:09:55,210 I think what Luke is trying to say is, 250 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:56,440 he's too old for this contest 251 00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,380 and he doesn't have the heart to tell you. 252 00:09:58,410 --> 00:10:00,980 That's impossible. I'm an adult. I'm still super into it. 253 00:10:01,010 --> 00:10:04,350 Yeah. My 20s should be my prime hot-dog-eating years. 254 00:10:04,380 --> 00:10:06,120 That was just my first attempt. 255 00:10:06,150 --> 00:10:07,980 I'm gonna figure this out. Hang on. 256 00:10:08,020 --> 00:10:11,520 Despite what Alex says, I have not lost my edge. 257 00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,560 Something just clicked. 258 00:10:14,190 --> 00:10:16,520 Fine. You're right... it's college. 259 00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:17,720 - It is? - Yeah. 260 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:19,540 I'm distracted because I'm feeling some pressure 261 00:10:19,560 --> 00:10:21,260 on which classes to take. 262 00:10:21,290 --> 00:10:23,530 But don't worry. I'm gonna figure it out. 263 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:27,430 Wow. How could you tell? 264 00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,960 I'm just a... perceptive guy. 265 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,140 I wasn't talking about Luke. The clicking was in my jaw. 266 00:10:33,170 --> 00:10:36,130 My old TMJ injury was back, thanks to all the training. 267 00:10:36,170 --> 00:10:38,040 I got it in college when I bet my roommate 268 00:10:38,070 --> 00:10:40,870 I could out-Frisbee-catch his golden retriever. 269 00:10:40,910 --> 00:10:42,770 And guess who wo... Aah! 270 00:10:45,230 --> 00:10:46,300 Aw. 271 00:10:46,330 --> 00:10:48,100 Arvin and I had the worst goodbye. 272 00:10:48,140 --> 00:10:50,570 It's been such a weird past couple months. 273 00:10:50,610 --> 00:10:51,700 That long? 274 00:10:51,740 --> 00:10:53,640 It feels like it all started in the hospital, 275 00:10:53,680 --> 00:10:54,840 after I told him I loved him. 276 00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:56,080 There you go. 277 00:10:56,110 --> 00:10:57,740 That's it. You pressured him. 278 00:10:57,780 --> 00:10:59,750 - Too much, too soon. - Maybe. 279 00:10:59,780 --> 00:11:01,680 Something's not lining up. 280 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:03,820 Okay, you're right. 281 00:11:03,860 --> 00:11:04,960 Seriously?! 282 00:11:04,990 --> 00:11:07,490 Something happened in the hospital while Arvin was gone. 283 00:11:09,860 --> 00:11:10,930 Lost again? 284 00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,260 No. This time, I meant to come back. 285 00:11:13,300 --> 00:11:15,100 I have some pretty big news. 286 00:11:15,140 --> 00:11:17,470 You should probably be sitting for this. 287 00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:18,640 O... kay. 288 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:26,470 I lied. 289 00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:28,140 I'm not married anymore. 290 00:11:28,170 --> 00:11:30,070 My wife left me for her ex-husband. 291 00:11:30,110 --> 00:11:31,540 I'm a divorcé. 292 00:11:32,740 --> 00:11:33,980 Why are you telling me this? 293 00:11:34,010 --> 00:11:36,680 Because I'm back in town, I'm going to nursing school, 294 00:11:36,710 --> 00:11:38,750 and we might run into each other. 295 00:11:38,780 --> 00:11:40,190 I don't want to spend the rest of my life 296 00:11:40,220 --> 00:11:42,120 pretending my wife is in the bathroom. 297 00:11:42,150 --> 00:11:45,250 Yeah, I would start to worry about her after a while. 298 00:11:45,290 --> 00:11:47,220 Well, I'm sorry it didn't work out. 299 00:11:47,770 --> 00:11:50,670 It's okay. I don't think we ever really got each other. 300 00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:53,240 Like, you know how when you and I used to go to concerts, 301 00:11:53,270 --> 00:11:55,870 we used to just look at each other and know... 302 00:11:55,890 --> 00:11:57,510 It was time for me to get on your shoulders 303 00:11:57,530 --> 00:11:58,670 and throw my bra at the drummer. 304 00:11:58,700 --> 00:11:59,760 Yeah. 305 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:01,730 Like, you probably have that with Arvin, right? 306 00:12:01,770 --> 00:12:03,270 - Definitely. - That's awesome. 307 00:12:03,300 --> 00:12:04,330 With my wife, 308 00:12:04,370 --> 00:12:07,870 she's pretty and smart and a doctor. 309 00:12:08,180 --> 00:12:09,910 But if you're always telling yourself 310 00:12:09,950 --> 00:12:11,110 how lucky you are, 311 00:12:11,150 --> 00:12:13,220 it's probably because you're afraid to ask yourself 312 00:12:13,250 --> 00:12:14,450 how happy you are. 313 00:12:14,490 --> 00:12:16,220 Right? 314 00:12:16,250 --> 00:12:18,290 I brought ice chips. 315 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,220 Or are they ice fries here? 316 00:12:22,330 --> 00:12:23,890 Ha. 317 00:12:25,510 --> 00:12:27,710 I can't believe Dylan got into my head. 318 00:12:27,750 --> 00:12:29,710 I can't believe he got into nursing school. 319 00:12:32,950 --> 00:12:34,200 That's the biggest one they got? 320 00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:36,790 Yes, and I'm not going back again. 321 00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:39,120 Have you seen Manny? I've been looking all over for him. 322 00:12:39,140 --> 00:12:40,310 I don't see him. 323 00:12:40,340 --> 00:12:42,680 I've been here, busy inspecting the troops. 324 00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:44,810 Young lady, could you straighten that hat? 325 00:12:44,850 --> 00:12:46,980 Sir, that... that horn could use a shine. 326 00:12:47,020 --> 00:12:48,220 Haircut. 327 00:12:48,250 --> 00:12:50,160 Gloria, if this goes well, in a couple of months, 328 00:12:50,190 --> 00:12:51,850 I'll be lighting the town Christmas tree. 329 00:12:51,890 --> 00:12:54,020 - Take that, Dad! - You know what is weird? 330 00:12:54,060 --> 00:12:56,560 After so many years at Carnaval, 331 00:12:56,590 --> 00:12:59,130 to be at a parade with people fully dressed. 332 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:00,630 Gloria, focus. 333 00:13:00,660 --> 00:13:02,260 You've got a big role in this. 334 00:13:02,310 --> 00:13:05,280 After I cut the ribbon, it's your job to fire off the cannon. 335 00:13:05,310 --> 00:13:07,450 That's the signal for everybody to start marching. 336 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:10,650 But isn't the grand marshal's job to fire the cannon? 337 00:13:10,680 --> 00:13:11,980 So the ribbon cuts itself? 338 00:13:12,020 --> 00:13:13,660 Gloria, what you don't know about parades... 339 00:13:13,690 --> 00:13:14,750 Wait, wait. 340 00:13:14,790 --> 00:13:17,320 Papi! Hello. 341 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:19,590 Are you coming? The parade is about to start. 342 00:13:19,630 --> 00:13:21,590 Hey! Jay! 343 00:13:21,950 --> 00:13:23,080 Hey, Tom! How's it going? 344 00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:26,190 Great, actually. My wife and I, we're back together. 345 00:13:26,220 --> 00:13:28,990 I... Well, not exactly. I mean, we're going on dates. 346 00:13:29,020 --> 00:13:30,270 - We're hoping to recapture... - Yeah, yeah. 347 00:13:30,290 --> 00:13:31,460 I want to hear all about it, 348 00:13:31,490 --> 00:13:33,460 but I think the local paper needs a photo. 349 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:34,930 O-Of course. Yeah. 350 00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:36,330 Gloria, get in the shot. 351 00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:38,600 Gloria. 352 00:13:38,630 --> 00:13:41,470 But you promised that you were going to come. 353 00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:43,200 Just shoot. No, go ahead... shoot it. 354 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:44,870 What? Okay. 355 00:13:44,910 --> 00:13:46,010 No, no, not yet! 356 00:13:50,250 --> 00:13:51,880 Damn it, Gloria! It's not cutting! 357 00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:53,250 These aren't lefties! 358 00:13:55,890 --> 00:13:58,920 Grand-marshal. Take that, Grandpa! 359 00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:00,360 You must be on top of the world. 360 00:14:00,460 --> 00:14:01,740 Well, I'm putting on a brave face 361 00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,380 for the good of the country, but the truth is, 362 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:05,100 we did not get off to a great start. 363 00:14:05,130 --> 00:14:06,900 Gloria is not on her game today, 364 00:14:06,940 --> 00:14:08,010 and I'm afraid she's gonna forget 365 00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:10,300 to lead the standing ovation after my speech. 366 00:14:10,680 --> 00:14:12,580 In fact, I'm tagging you in. 367 00:14:12,610 --> 00:14:14,610 Your cue is "pursuit of happiness." 368 00:14:14,650 --> 00:14:16,530 And if you could sell it, a "bravo" would be nice. 369 00:14:16,550 --> 00:14:18,780 Okay. I-I know what's wrong with Gloria. 370 00:14:18,820 --> 00:14:20,860 This is a big day for you, and she's feeling left out. 371 00:14:20,890 --> 00:14:21,920 No, that's not it. 372 00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:22,990 Damn it. 373 00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:25,050 You're not getting here till tomorrow? 374 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:27,720 How does your name even have the word "man" in it? 375 00:14:27,750 --> 00:14:28,780 Something just clicked. 376 00:14:28,820 --> 00:14:30,180 - Jaw trouble? - No! 377 00:14:30,220 --> 00:14:33,290 She was just on with Manny, who's not coming. 378 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:36,490 Don't Gloria and Manny have some Fourth of July tradition? 379 00:14:36,580 --> 00:14:37,820 Come to think of it, 380 00:14:37,850 --> 00:14:39,930 they share a slice of apple pie and watch the fireworks. 381 00:14:39,950 --> 00:14:42,190 They've been doing that every year since he was born! 382 00:14:42,220 --> 00:14:45,820 Until this year, which is why Gloria is upset. 383 00:14:45,860 --> 00:14:46,990 - Yes! - You're right! 384 00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:48,530 I let the sash go to my head. 385 00:14:48,560 --> 00:14:49,800 I never should have brought it! 386 00:14:49,830 --> 00:14:51,230 I can help you out, 387 00:14:51,260 --> 00:14:53,140 but you're gonna have to give up on your little speech thing. 388 00:14:53,170 --> 00:14:55,110 Hey, kid. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where'd you get the fireworks? 389 00:14:55,130 --> 00:14:57,300 - You a cop? - Co... 390 00:14:57,340 --> 00:14:59,300 There's a stand in the grocery store parking lot. 391 00:14:59,340 --> 00:15:00,800 But he's closing up. 392 00:15:01,290 --> 00:15:02,920 You get the fireworks and the apple pie. 393 00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:04,260 I will take care of Manny. 394 00:15:04,290 --> 00:15:06,190 I am back. I am really back! 395 00:15:06,230 --> 00:15:07,330 My car's blocked in. 396 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:08,670 All this traffic, I'll never make it. 397 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:09,930 Look at that... right there. 398 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:12,800 Check out! I'm a Shriner. 399 00:15:12,830 --> 00:15:15,200 Cool! Listen, I need to borrow your car. 400 00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:16,440 It's kind of an emergency. 401 00:15:16,470 --> 00:15:18,410 But my dad's excited to see me in the parade. 402 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:19,780 He was a Tuskegee Airman. 403 00:15:19,810 --> 00:15:21,780 Maybe the minute you stop trying so hard 404 00:15:21,810 --> 00:15:23,410 is the minute he'll start loving you. 405 00:15:23,450 --> 00:15:25,130 Now hop out of there and go clear a path for me 406 00:15:25,150 --> 00:15:26,420 through those lawn chairs. 407 00:15:26,450 --> 00:15:28,370 - Come on. I'll help you out. - But... I don't... 408 00:15:30,110 --> 00:15:32,240 How about this one, okay? 409 00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:33,860 Maybe we'll get lucky and he'll be good at this. 410 00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:35,980 Okay, don't you think this is a little hateful... 411 00:15:36,020 --> 00:15:38,020 - waterboarding a clown for a prize? - Come on. 412 00:15:38,050 --> 00:15:39,830 You guys spray each other with seltzer all the time. 413 00:15:39,850 --> 00:15:41,200 That's between two consenting clowns. 414 00:15:41,220 --> 00:15:43,550 All right, one second. Let's get this. 415 00:15:43,590 --> 00:15:45,360 Okay, go ahead. Okay. 416 00:15:45,390 --> 00:15:47,960 - No. No. Wrong way, wrong way. - Okay, all right, you got to... 417 00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:49,680 - Okay, it's fine. - You know what? 418 00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:53,200 Maybe it's just time we admit to Pam we haven't taught him a thing. 419 00:15:53,230 --> 00:15:55,970 You know, I just... I don't want to let him down. 420 00:15:56,050 --> 00:15:58,620 I-I've come to really enjoy having him around. 421 00:15:58,660 --> 00:16:00,090 I know, I know. Me too. 422 00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:01,820 But it's not like we're bad at parenting. 423 00:16:01,860 --> 00:16:04,490 I mean, Lily turned out to be a smart, sensitive little girl. 424 00:16:04,530 --> 00:16:07,130 You're a disgrace to this family! 425 00:16:07,170 --> 00:16:09,570 I don't think you heard me. I'm over the bridge. 426 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:11,830 I know. Now we're just catching up. 427 00:16:11,870 --> 00:16:13,700 Sorry I didn't win. 428 00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:16,070 No, no, no. You don't have to apologize, okay? 429 00:16:16,110 --> 00:16:17,240 No, no, you did just great. 430 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:19,710 We're the ones who need to do better. 431 00:16:19,890 --> 00:16:21,760 And you know what? You give great hugs. 432 00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:23,660 Hey. We taught him that. 433 00:16:23,700 --> 00:16:26,010 Well, too bad it isn't exactly a skill. 434 00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:27,670 Yeah. Or is it? 435 00:16:29,170 --> 00:16:30,570 Mutton busting?! 436 00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:31,670 Why? What is that? 437 00:16:31,710 --> 00:16:34,310 It's a sheep rodeo for kids. 438 00:16:34,340 --> 00:16:36,270 It's like you didn't even have a childhood. 439 00:16:36,310 --> 00:16:37,740 Come on! 440 00:16:37,780 --> 00:16:40,950 The hot dog contest is about to begin. 441 00:16:41,010 --> 00:16:42,540 Sorry I'm not in worse shape for this. 442 00:16:42,580 --> 00:16:45,080 Don't worry about it, buddy. You've had a lot on your mind. 443 00:16:45,110 --> 00:16:46,810 Any luck choosing your courses? 444 00:16:46,850 --> 00:16:48,010 Not yet. 445 00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:50,090 I don't really want to talk about that right now. 446 00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:51,730 Maybe you're putting too much pressure on... 447 00:16:51,750 --> 00:16:53,650 It's more than just picking classes, okay? 448 00:16:53,690 --> 00:16:55,800 Can we just drop it and focus on what we're doing here? 449 00:16:55,820 --> 00:16:57,690 Yeah. Of course. 450 00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:03,790 Exciting to be in the competition? 451 00:17:03,820 --> 00:17:06,270 Instead of sitting up in the bleachers, like the last three years? 452 00:17:06,290 --> 00:17:07,420 I guess. 453 00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,360 Scary, sure, but it does feel good 454 00:17:09,390 --> 00:17:10,960 putting our butts on the line. 455 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,160 You lose 100% 456 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,060 of the hot-dog-eating contests you don't enter. 457 00:17:14,100 --> 00:17:15,970 Dad, I know what your bumper sticker is, 458 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:17,800 and I know what you're trying to do here. 459 00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:19,240 But college is different. 460 00:17:19,270 --> 00:17:22,240 I mean, you screw up at community college, you're out of options. 461 00:17:22,370 --> 00:17:23,830 You're not gonna screw it up. 462 00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:26,470 I've messed up a lot of things in my life. 463 00:17:26,500 --> 00:17:27,840 I'm scared I'll do it again. 464 00:17:27,870 --> 00:17:29,640 - Good. - What? 465 00:17:29,670 --> 00:17:30,910 Being scared means you care. 466 00:17:30,940 --> 00:17:34,240 Maybe... Maybe that's what's been missing in the past. 467 00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,110 It's the biggest thing I've ever tried to do. 468 00:17:36,150 --> 00:17:38,350 Contestants, ready position. 469 00:17:38,380 --> 00:17:39,950 Just take it one step at a time. 470 00:17:39,980 --> 00:17:42,720 Don't worry about the 50 to hopefully 75 hot dogs 471 00:17:42,750 --> 00:17:43,780 you're gonna eat. 472 00:17:43,820 --> 00:17:45,620 Just worry about the dog in front of you. 473 00:17:47,460 --> 00:17:48,790 And wet the buns. 474 00:17:48,830 --> 00:17:49,960 Eat! 475 00:17:52,070 --> 00:17:53,630 Are we sure this is safe? My gosh, yes. 476 00:17:53,670 --> 00:17:55,110 The kids love it, the sheep love it. 477 00:17:56,070 --> 00:17:57,700 And I'm pretty sure it's too late. 478 00:17:57,740 --> 00:18:00,370 - Whoa! - Hang on, Cal! Keep hugging! 479 00:18:00,410 --> 00:18:02,140 My gosh. Pam is gonna be so excited. 480 00:18:02,180 --> 00:18:04,140 He's already busting at a first-grade level. 481 00:18:07,410 --> 00:18:09,850 Better get an X-ray. You got trampled pretty bad. 482 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,820 Looks like that ankle's broken. 483 00:18:13,390 --> 00:18:14,590 Really, Jerry? 484 00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:17,960 Haley? What are you doing here? 485 00:18:18,570 --> 00:18:19,850 Well, you tweeted you were working, 486 00:18:19,870 --> 00:18:21,620 the water tower's in the back of your Instagram story, 487 00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:22,750 and you just left a Yelp rating 488 00:18:22,780 --> 00:18:24,050 for that falafel place around the corner, 489 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:25,250 so I figured out where you were. 490 00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:27,280 Could you please stop being so obsessed with me? 491 00:18:27,310 --> 00:18:28,380 Wait... what? 492 00:18:28,420 --> 00:18:30,410 That thing that you said at the hospital? 493 00:18:30,420 --> 00:18:32,550 How if a person felt lucky to be in a relationship, 494 00:18:32,590 --> 00:18:34,230 that means that they couldn't really be happy? 495 00:18:34,260 --> 00:18:35,620 Obviously, you did that 496 00:18:35,660 --> 00:18:37,070 to try and ruin what I have with Arvin, 497 00:18:37,090 --> 00:18:38,830 because you're not over me. 498 00:18:38,860 --> 00:18:40,630 I seriously don't know whether to laugh 499 00:18:40,660 --> 00:18:42,800 or check you for a spider bite. 500 00:18:42,830 --> 00:18:44,640 I'm sorry that you're questioning your relationship, 501 00:18:44,670 --> 00:18:45,730 but it's not my fault. 502 00:18:45,770 --> 00:18:47,440 Just admit it! 503 00:18:47,470 --> 00:18:49,700 You said that to try and get back with me. 504 00:18:50,070 --> 00:18:52,440 Look, in my heart of hearts... 505 00:18:52,470 --> 00:18:54,710 which does not exist, by the way... 506 00:18:54,740 --> 00:18:57,540 yeah, I still think about us. We were great. 507 00:18:57,580 --> 00:18:59,510 - Aha! - Nuh-ha! 508 00:18:59,550 --> 00:19:00,890 You're the one who drove across town, 509 00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:02,480 paid $12 for parking 510 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:05,220 and then an additional $2 for the yellow wristband 511 00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:07,950 for beer and medical tent access. 512 00:19:08,090 --> 00:19:10,190 It sounds like you're the one who's into me. 513 00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:11,660 You're crazy. 514 00:19:11,700 --> 00:19:13,330 There's no crime in wondering 515 00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:15,400 if we might still be good together. 516 00:19:15,430 --> 00:19:18,100 I still see us together in my mind's eye... 517 00:19:18,140 --> 00:19:20,500 - which, by the way, doesn't exist. - I can't hear it again. 518 00:19:22,470 --> 00:19:24,270 Diagnosis... nothing. 519 00:19:34,050 --> 00:19:35,320 How was the parade? 520 00:19:35,350 --> 00:19:36,980 I had something more important to do. 521 00:19:37,020 --> 00:19:38,190 Apple pie? 522 00:19:38,220 --> 00:19:40,090 I got a few weird looks at the drive-through, 523 00:19:40,120 --> 00:19:43,920 but it was worth it to help keep your tradition alive. 524 00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,730 You mean Manny and me? 525 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:47,540 It's not gonna happen, because... 526 00:19:47,580 --> 00:19:49,010 I've got that covered, too. 527 00:19:51,210 --> 00:19:52,450 ♪ Ta-da! ♪ 528 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:54,520 Hi, Mom! I miss you! 529 00:19:54,550 --> 00:19:55,980 Jay! That's perfect! 530 00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:57,320 It's not perfect yet. 531 00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:01,700 Should we really give the dangerous job 532 00:20:01,730 --> 00:20:03,890 to my only smart one? 533 00:20:03,930 --> 00:20:05,730 ♪ 534 00:20:08,730 --> 00:20:11,500 Happy Fourth of July, Papi! 535 00:20:11,530 --> 00:20:13,700 I'll be home soon... before you know it. 536 00:20:13,740 --> 00:20:14,940 "Thomas Jefferson, 537 00:20:14,970 --> 00:20:16,940 who was sort of the grand marshal of his time, 538 00:20:16,970 --> 00:20:19,610 believed this country should be a place where people are free 539 00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:22,310 to pursue happiness and a better life, 540 00:20:22,350 --> 00:20:26,210 where we can set our sights on the stars 541 00:20:26,250 --> 00:20:28,180 and, with hard work and determination... 542 00:20:29,390 --> 00:20:31,890 ...make the impossible a reality. 543 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:33,020 No! 544 00:20:33,060 --> 00:20:35,490 Because Americans don't run from challenges. 545 00:20:35,530 --> 00:20:36,790 We embrace them. 546 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:40,930 God bless America. 547 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,030 Hold for applause." 548 00:20:43,070 --> 00:20:44,600 That would've killed, right? 549 00:20:44,630 --> 00:20:46,170 Bravo! 550 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,840 You know, I gave up a lot today. You could mean it. 551 00:20:51,550 --> 00:20:53,920 Never too late to start training for next year! 552 00:20:53,950 --> 00:20:55,960 Let's loosen up first with some exercises. 553 00:20:55,990 --> 00:20:59,520 Lamalick. Dizzy Gillespie. Tiffy pop it. 554 00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:00,960 Hold it. 555 00:21:00,980 --> 00:21:03,480 - And out. Tiffy... - Dad, I don't think I can ever eat 556 00:21:03,510 --> 00:21:04,700 another hot dog again. 557 00:21:05,420 --> 00:21:07,140 Yeah, I thought you might feel this way. 558 00:21:07,590 --> 00:21:10,090 - Hey, you there? - What? 559 00:21:10,120 --> 00:21:12,640 We're having some trouble getting these bad boys down. 560 00:21:12,660 --> 00:21:14,860 I'm not surprised, you pathetic losers. 561 00:21:14,880 --> 00:21:17,620 You two disgust me more than what's in those hot dogs. 562 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:18,900 What's the hold up? 563 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:21,790 Are we saving our bodies for bikini season, ladies? 564 00:21:22,650 --> 00:21:25,250 - She's good. - She better be. She's expensive. 565 00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:30,280 == resynced by Brach_Movic aka GilangPC ==