1
00:00:01,230 --> 00:00:04,073
Okay, folks, you might want
to put on some sunscreen.
2
00:00:04,119 --> 00:00:06,338
Up this high,
the trees start to thin out.
3
00:00:06,424 --> 00:00:08,244
Oh, this might be a good place
for a picture.
4
00:00:08,330 --> 00:00:09,347
Oh, let me go behind that rock.
5
00:00:09,432 --> 00:00:10,635
I'll change into my next look.
6
00:00:10,721 --> 00:00:11,746
Another one?
7
00:00:11,832 --> 00:00:14,198
He has to. His Instagram
follower demands it.
8
00:00:14,284 --> 00:00:16,299
Eagle!
Oh, wait, false alarm.
9
00:00:16,385 --> 00:00:17,924
It's just a plastic bag
in a tree.
10
00:00:18,010 --> 00:00:20,112
Eagle!
Nope. Sorry.
11
00:00:20,198 --> 00:00:21,338
Bag fell.
12
00:00:22,385 --> 00:00:23,658
Every winter,
13
00:00:23,744 --> 00:00:25,963
I take a bird-watching trip
with my buddies...
14
00:00:26,049 --> 00:00:27,969
specifically to see
a bald eagle.
15
00:00:28,055 --> 00:00:29,672
So far, no luck.
16
00:00:29,758 --> 00:00:33,179
This year, my buddies bailed...
back spasm, cracked hip.
17
00:00:33,305 --> 00:00:35,867
And I'm the idiot
for installing a shower chair.
18
00:00:36,010 --> 00:00:37,586
I was all set to go solo,
19
00:00:37,672 --> 00:00:40,422
when those three tagalongs
invited themselves.
20
00:00:40,529 --> 00:00:42,065
They invaded my territory
21
00:00:42,151 --> 00:00:44,500
like a bunch
of bay-breasted warblers.
22
00:00:44,728 --> 00:00:46,842
Darned if I didn't feel
like a bay-breasted warbler
23
00:00:46,927 --> 00:00:50,056
horning in on Jay's trip,
but Gloria made us go.
24
00:00:50,142 --> 00:00:51,642
She was worried
about my dad
25
00:00:51,728 --> 00:00:53,345
being out in the woods
alone at his age,
26
00:00:53,431 --> 00:00:56,114
so she... she gently nudged us to
join him.
27
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,696
Gloria, if my dad
doesn't want us t...
28
00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:01,103
Hey, Dad, uh,
whatcha doin' this weekend?
29
00:01:01,189 --> 00:01:03,470
- Ah, little nature trip.
- Oh! Sounds like fun.
30
00:01:03,556 --> 00:01:04,572
- Count us in!
- Yes.
31
00:01:04,658 --> 00:01:05,729
Actually, I was looking
for a little
32
00:01:05,814 --> 00:01:06,696
- alone time...
- Hey!
33
00:01:06,782 --> 00:01:09,614
Am I the only one with
bald eagles on the brain?
34
00:01:10,898 --> 00:01:12,295
You know what?
I think in about 10 minutes,
35
00:01:12,380 --> 00:01:13,396
the light's gonna
be perfect
36
00:01:13,481 --> 00:01:15,107
for my
"Afternoon Adventurer" look.
37
00:01:15,216 --> 00:01:17,501
Okay, uh, before we
head deeper into the woods,
38
00:01:17,598 --> 00:01:19,028
I should warn you
folks that there's been
39
00:01:19,113 --> 00:01:21,016
several bear
sightings in the area.
40
00:01:21,102 --> 00:01:22,188
So if you happen to have
any food
41
00:01:22,274 --> 00:01:23,526
- with you...
- Got it!
42
00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:27,877
I was going to say
you can store it
43
00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:29,597
in this bear box... here.
44
00:01:29,698 --> 00:01:31,035
Oh. Um, okay.
45
00:01:31,121 --> 00:01:32,286
Well, then,
talk amongst yourselves.
46
00:01:32,371 --> 00:01:33,632
It... could take me
a while
47
00:01:33,717 --> 00:01:36,051
to find where my
manly heave sent that heavy...
48
00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:38,004
Ah! Here it is.
Someone must've heaved it back.
49
00:01:38,090 --> 00:01:39,484
Thank you!
50
00:01:47,255 --> 00:01:48,981
*MODERN FAMILY*
Season 10 Episode 11
51
00:01:49,081 --> 00:01:51,316
*MODERN FAMILY*
Episode Title: "The Wild"
52
00:01:52,300 --> 00:01:53,703
Synchronized by srjanapala
53
00:01:53,789 --> 00:01:55,151
Hello!
54
00:01:55,237 --> 00:01:57,448
Oh, hey, Gloria.
Thanks for coming.
55
00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:58,914
It's gonna be
such a fun girls' night...
56
00:01:58,999 --> 00:02:01,316
drinking wine,
planning the nursery.
57
00:02:01,402 --> 00:02:02,914
Okay, I was
going to surprise you,
58
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,042
but I can't wait anymore.
59
00:02:05,549 --> 00:02:09,550
It's a handmade mobile
of great women in history!
60
00:02:09,636 --> 00:02:11,117
Eleanor Roosevelt,
61
00:02:11,167 --> 00:02:12,231
Rosa Parks!
62
00:02:12,317 --> 00:02:13,386
Ohh!
63
00:02:13,472 --> 00:02:14,520
I just hope
it goes with the theme
64
00:02:14,605 --> 00:02:15,930
that Dylan wants
for the room.
65
00:02:16,016 --> 00:02:17,535
Are any of these women
important in the fields
66
00:02:17,620 --> 00:02:19,300
of fire trucks or unicorns?
67
00:02:19,386 --> 00:02:20,482
Oh!
68
00:02:20,568 --> 00:02:22,409
How perfect is this?
69
00:02:22,495 --> 00:02:24,339
They delivered the crib,
70
00:02:24,425 --> 00:02:27,300
and I know
just the crew of handy honeys
71
00:02:27,393 --> 00:02:28,378
to help me
put it together.
72
00:02:28,464 --> 00:02:30,870
Uh, not now, Mom.
I've had the worst day.
73
00:02:30,956 --> 00:02:32,753
Me, too.
Quick, start crying.
74
00:02:32,839 --> 00:02:35,198
We need to derail her enthusiasm
before she's...
75
00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:36,581
Unh! Too late.
76
00:02:36,667 --> 00:02:37,844
She's dancing.
77
00:02:37,969 --> 00:02:40,464
Way to rock it,
girlfriend!
78
00:02:41,146 --> 00:02:43,190
I cannot deny it anymore.
79
00:02:43,276 --> 00:02:45,890
I am turning into
a white woman.
80
00:02:48,324 --> 00:02:50,504
Is there a problem,
girlfriends?
81
00:02:50,590 --> 00:02:52,292
Spin class was canceled!
82
00:02:52,378 --> 00:02:53,421
No!
83
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:54,917
What are we gonna do
with our day?
84
00:02:55,005 --> 00:02:56,331
"When In Doubt...
85
00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:57,468
Brunch."
86
00:02:57,561 --> 00:02:59,339
Where's the nearest
place that serves kale
87
00:02:59,425 --> 00:03:01,331
and also has a pun
in its name?
88
00:03:01,464 --> 00:03:03,651
There's an Underground
Kale-Road down the street!
89
00:03:03,737 --> 00:03:05,323
- Let's go!
- Thank God.
90
00:03:05,706 --> 00:03:07,783
I've gotten soft
lately.
91
00:03:07,868 --> 00:03:09,917
I think I've lost my
Colombian edge.
92
00:03:10,003 --> 00:03:12,486
I think we'll all feel better
if we accomplish something.
93
00:03:12,572 --> 00:03:14,167
Yes. Unlike Jay.
94
00:03:14,253 --> 00:03:17,417
He's been going on these
hunting trips for 20 years,
95
00:03:17,503 --> 00:03:21,706
and not once has he
brought home a bald eagle!
96
00:03:25,362 --> 00:03:26,534
Oh, God.
97
00:03:26,757 --> 00:03:28,081
Hendrix couldn't read music,
98
00:03:28,167 --> 00:03:29,659
Shaq couldn't make free throws,
99
00:03:29,745 --> 00:03:32,489
and I have a little trouble
visualizing space and scale.
100
00:03:32,592 --> 00:03:35,190
So, I think this closet
design gives us everything we need
101
00:03:35,276 --> 00:03:36,519
in a tight,
residential space.
102
00:03:36,605 --> 00:03:37,987
Yeah.
Very clever.
103
00:03:38,073 --> 00:03:39,128
Take
a walk-through.
104
00:03:39,214 --> 00:03:40,597
Does the flow
make sense?
105
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:42,261
Well, um...
106
00:03:42,393 --> 00:03:44,026
I would
get out of the shower
107
00:03:44,112 --> 00:03:46,995
and... throw my
clothes in the hamper here,
108
00:03:47,120 --> 00:03:49,007
pick out an outfit, and
then get dressed right here.
109
00:03:49,092 --> 00:03:51,175
You just threw your
clothes in the fireplace
110
00:03:51,261 --> 00:03:53,089
and got dressed
in front of the picture window.
111
00:03:53,174 --> 00:03:55,987
Well, you have your
morning routine, Mia.
112
00:03:56,073 --> 00:03:57,651
I have mine.
113
00:03:59,054 --> 00:04:01,019
All right,
let's get this over with.
114
00:04:01,105 --> 00:04:02,480
Mom, where do we start?
115
00:04:02,566 --> 00:04:03,597
Um...
116
00:04:03,683 --> 00:04:07,269
Maybe Mommy just needs
some cougar juice!
117
00:04:07,909 --> 00:04:09,472
What's wrong with me?
118
00:04:11,222 --> 00:04:12,503
Watch your step,
folks.
119
00:04:12,589 --> 00:04:14,009
Some of the terrain
gets a little tricky
120
00:04:14,094 --> 00:04:15,065
on this part of the hike.
121
00:04:15,151 --> 00:04:16,612
Oh. Good.
I thought I'd changed
122
00:04:16,698 --> 00:04:19,081
into my "Remote Trailhead"
look too soon. So...
123
00:04:19,167 --> 00:04:21,386
You okay, Dad?
Want to stop and take a break?
124
00:04:21,472 --> 00:04:23,737
No, no. I just want to stop
and maybe see an eagle.
125
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:25,337
Everybody look.
126
00:04:27,979 --> 00:04:29,998
You've been doing this for 20
years and never seen one, huh?
127
00:04:30,083 --> 00:04:33,057
- Correct. Shh.
- Oh.
128
00:04:34,472 --> 00:04:35,526
Yeah.
129
00:04:35,683 --> 00:04:37,526
- Mother Nature can be a real...
- Phil,
130
00:04:37,612 --> 00:04:38,961
stop talking!
131
00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:40,409
You're scaring the eagles!
132
00:04:40,495 --> 00:04:42,557
I'm sorry.
My bad. My bad.
133
00:04:42,643 --> 00:04:44,987
- Also sorry in my head.
- Oh, my God!
134
00:04:45,487 --> 00:04:48,284
Since we're talking again, uh,
we should start heading back.
135
00:04:48,370 --> 00:04:49,580
It'll be dark soon.
136
00:04:49,665 --> 00:04:51,800
Or, if you'd like,
there's a cabin just up this trail.
137
00:04:51,886 --> 00:04:52,976
It's pretty run-down, but, uh,
138
00:04:53,034 --> 00:04:54,038
you're welcome
to spend the night.
139
00:04:54,123 --> 00:04:55,651
- I'll do it.
- Oh.
140
00:04:55,737 --> 00:04:57,220
Uh! Are...
Are we sure that's a good idea?
141
00:04:57,305 --> 00:04:59,483
Um... wasn't there...
wasn't there mention of bears?
142
00:04:59,569 --> 00:05:01,518
No, you go home.
I'll stay by myself.
143
00:05:01,603 --> 00:05:02,690
Uh, huh.
144
00:05:02,876 --> 00:05:04,066
We...
We can't let him stay by himself.
145
00:05:04,151 --> 00:05:05,488
We told Gloria
we'd keep him safe.
146
00:05:05,573 --> 00:05:07,292
Yeah, if he's staying,
we're staying.
147
00:05:07,378 --> 00:05:09,620
Yeah. Yeah. What...
What's the worst that could happen?
148
00:05:09,706 --> 00:05:11,925
I mean, in the movies,
when city folk stay overnight
149
00:05:12,011 --> 00:05:14,460
in abandoned cabins,
things usually pan out okay.
150
00:05:14,545 --> 00:05:16,676
Anyway, I'm gonna run ahead,
see if they have any postcards
151
00:05:16,761 --> 00:05:19,143
up at this poorly
guarded mental institution.
152
00:05:21,448 --> 00:05:22,816
Damn it,
I'm starving.
153
00:05:22,901 --> 00:05:24,840
Nothing in here
but an old bottle of whiskey.
154
00:05:24,926 --> 00:05:26,895
Well, just try not to
think about how hungry you are
155
00:05:26,980 --> 00:05:28,653
or that Mitchell left
the food in the bear box.
156
00:05:28,738 --> 00:05:30,176
We all left the food in the...
157
00:05:30,262 --> 00:05:31,410
Did you change again?
158
00:05:31,757 --> 00:05:33,472
Yeah, I just threw a few things
together
159
00:05:33,558 --> 00:05:35,801
to create a "Rustic Cabin" look.
160
00:05:35,925 --> 00:05:37,949
Well, at least
the bears won't be a concern.
161
00:05:38,035 --> 00:05:39,105
Take it from a Realtor.
162
00:05:39,199 --> 00:05:41,902
This Smith & Wiley lock
is the gold standard.
163
00:05:49,793 --> 00:05:52,442
All right, I think
we are now ready to put together
164
00:05:52,528 --> 00:05:55,872
our beautiful,
L-shaped crib.
165
00:05:56,072 --> 00:05:58,412
I-I... This can't be right.
One's way bigger.
166
00:05:58,529 --> 00:06:01,099
And what, my babies are supposed
to come and go as they please,
167
00:06:01,185 --> 00:06:02,434
like they're in
a halfway house?
168
00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:05,731
Um, so, a minor misreading of the
diagram.
169
00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:07,021
I think we're just
gonna need to swap
170
00:06:07,106 --> 00:06:08,685
a short side for a long side.
171
00:06:08,771 --> 00:06:10,583
And in the meantime,
we bent that bracket.
172
00:06:10,669 --> 00:06:12,475
Alex, would you mind running down
to the hardware store?
173
00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:13,638
No way.
174
00:06:13,724 --> 00:06:15,554
I don't trust myself
to drive anymore.
175
00:06:15,657 --> 00:06:17,497
I signed up
to be the student liaison
176
00:06:17,583 --> 00:06:19,161
for a visiting scholar
on campus...
177
00:06:19,247 --> 00:06:20,695
Sir Kenneth Penrose.
178
00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:23,028
Yes, that Sir Kenneth Penrose.
179
00:06:23,114 --> 00:06:25,114
Rock star
of the microbiology world.
180
00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:26,669
I know you must
hear this a lot,
181
00:06:26,755 --> 00:06:28,341
but you're the reason
I took up snooker.
182
00:06:28,427 --> 00:06:29,528
Do you still play?
183
00:06:29,614 --> 00:06:31,388
I've had to lay down my cue lately.
184
00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:33,872
I've been working for
months on an Ebola vaccine.
185
00:06:33,959 --> 00:06:35,645
Just moments ago,
I had a breakthrough.
186
00:06:35,731 --> 00:06:37,561
I can't wait to get
to the lab and jot...
187
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:38,924
- Hey!
- Aah!
188
00:06:39,395 --> 00:06:41,942
Whoa! That was my chemistry advisor.
189
00:06:42,028 --> 00:06:44,113
I would not want to be
known as the girl who...
190
00:06:45,037 --> 00:06:46,675
Sir Kenneth?
191
00:06:47,368 --> 00:06:48,730
W-Where am I?
192
00:06:49,144 --> 00:06:50,534
You don't know the shame.
193
00:06:50,620 --> 00:06:51,973
Now they won't let me drive around
194
00:06:52,058 --> 00:06:54,816
anyone smarter
than a sociology professor.
195
00:06:54,902 --> 00:06:57,159
You know what else
hit the ground today? Me.
196
00:06:57,245 --> 00:06:59,980
While I was bending over to
pickup a doughnut off the floor!
197
00:07:00,066 --> 00:07:02,316
It was covered in dust balls,
but I didn't care,
198
00:07:02,402 --> 00:07:03,848
'cause I'm a disgusting
pig monster.
199
00:07:03,934 --> 00:07:05,085
Oh, honey, please.
200
00:07:05,171 --> 00:07:06,198
You're as...
201
00:07:06,284 --> 00:07:07,518
as beautiful as ever.
202
00:07:07,604 --> 00:07:09,136
Tell that to MugScan.
203
00:07:09,459 --> 00:07:12,917
MugScan is a face-recognition
program we use at work.
204
00:07:13,098 --> 00:07:14,753
It was really mean to me.
205
00:07:16,385 --> 00:07:17,769
Good morning, Wayne.
206
00:07:17,910 --> 00:07:18,933
Wayne?
207
00:07:19,019 --> 00:07:20,886
I'm not Wayne, you jerk!
208
00:07:21,627 --> 00:07:23,131
Gosh!
209
00:07:31,808 --> 00:07:33,308
You all right, Haley?
210
00:07:33,423 --> 00:07:35,424
I'm fine, Wayne.
211
00:07:35,668 --> 00:07:37,660
One of my shoes
flew off in the fall,
212
00:07:37,746 --> 00:07:40,347
and I couldn't put it back on
because my feet were so swollen.
213
00:07:40,519 --> 00:07:43,170
You know who makes a great shoe?
New Balance.
214
00:07:43,255 --> 00:07:45,590
I wear them when I power-walk
to Neil Diamond.
215
00:07:46,465 --> 00:07:48,824
Hey, Mom,
is this divider a little too high?
216
00:07:48,958 --> 00:07:50,762
No. No, it's
supposed to be that way.
217
00:07:50,848 --> 00:07:53,308
That way, if one twin
wants to visit the other,
218
00:07:53,394 --> 00:07:56,387
he can just go,
"Ah, doot, doot, doot. Hi!"
219
00:07:56,473 --> 00:07:58,074
- Aaaah!
- Hey!
220
00:07:59,894 --> 00:08:01,941
Couple thoughts.
221
00:08:02,766 --> 00:08:04,418
- Pair of 7s.
- Ace high.
222
00:08:04,556 --> 00:08:07,808
Everyone, I'd like you to
meet Don Lemon and RuPaul,
223
00:08:07,894 --> 00:08:09,324
a pair of black queens.
224
00:08:09,410 --> 00:08:11,918
Mitchell, that's the third time
you've wandered over there.
225
00:08:12,004 --> 00:08:13,097
What are you doing?
226
00:08:13,207 --> 00:08:14,846
- Nothing.
- He's got something in his mouth.
227
00:08:14,931 --> 00:08:16,491
- Get him!
- No. No, I don't. - Come here!
228
00:08:16,576 --> 00:08:18,869
- No, no, no!
- Don't... Don't fight. Don't...
229
00:08:18,955 --> 00:08:19,934
He has beef jerky!
230
00:08:20,020 --> 00:08:21,207
That's the last of it. I swear.
231
00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:23,252
- He's lying. Check his pockets.
- No, I...
232
00:08:23,369 --> 00:08:25,431
- Stop it, stop it, stop it!
- It's a family pack!
233
00:08:25,601 --> 00:08:27,729
I hope the jerky was as
delicious as the irony.
234
00:08:27,815 --> 00:08:29,645
- Give it!
- No, stop it! Stop it...
235
00:08:29,731 --> 00:08:31,220
No!
236
00:08:31,945 --> 00:08:34,111
Great. We're sending
beef smoke signals
237
00:08:34,197 --> 00:08:35,517
to a forest full of bears.
238
00:08:35,603 --> 00:08:37,296
I'm sorry!
I should've shared!
239
00:08:37,382 --> 00:08:39,638
Meanwhile, there is a
sack full of hiking snacks
240
00:08:39,724 --> 00:08:40,765
just up the road!
241
00:08:40,851 --> 00:08:41,666
Brie, prosciutto,
242
00:08:41,751 --> 00:08:44,261
not to mention a wonderful
maple-walnut butter
243
00:08:44,346 --> 00:08:46,218
that Gloria recommended
on her Pinterest board.
244
00:08:46,304 --> 00:08:47,430
That's it.
I'm going out there.
245
00:08:47,515 --> 00:08:48,516
Jay, wait!
246
00:08:48,602 --> 00:08:50,695
If you see a bear,
remember...
247
00:08:50,837 --> 00:08:52,577
blind it
with the flash on your phone,
248
00:08:52,663 --> 00:08:54,585
then lie on your back
in a submissive pose.
249
00:08:54,671 --> 00:08:56,715
I'm not doing that.
If I come face-to-face with a bear,
250
00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:58,171
he better run!
251
00:09:03,152 --> 00:09:04,598
It's darker
out there...
252
00:09:04,730 --> 00:09:06,220
Aaaaaaaah!
253
00:09:07,683 --> 00:09:09,359
Are you sure
it was the best idea
254
00:09:09,445 --> 00:09:10,117
to attach these
255
00:09:10,203 --> 00:09:11,507
before moving them upstairs?
256
00:09:11,608 --> 00:09:13,030
Yeah, I eyeballed the space.
257
00:09:13,116 --> 00:09:15,124
- It really should fit easily.
- Ow!
258
00:09:15,492 --> 00:09:18,523
Except Alex apparently has
steered us into a jam.
259
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:21,364
Oh, that must be the pizza guy.
Coming, Carl!
260
00:09:21,542 --> 00:09:23,210
You know the pizza guy's name?
261
00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:24,515
No!
262
00:09:26,930 --> 00:09:28,499
- Hi.
- Hey, Haley.
263
00:09:28,585 --> 00:09:30,820
Surprised to get an order
from you before midnight.
264
00:09:30,906 --> 00:09:33,290
By the way, how'd you like that
custom shrimp and potato pizza?
265
00:09:33,375 --> 00:09:36,354
I don't even know
what you're talking about.
266
00:09:36,614 --> 00:09:37,796
Loved it. Love you.
267
00:09:37,882 --> 00:09:39,515
Gonna go get my wallet!
268
00:09:42,609 --> 00:09:43,640
Mom?
269
00:09:43,726 --> 00:09:44,641
Okay.
270
00:09:44,727 --> 00:09:46,984
Alex, run downstairs
and get a screwdriver.
271
00:09:47,070 --> 00:09:49,305
This whole thing will fit easily
once we take the cribs apart.
272
00:09:49,390 --> 00:09:50,405
We don't even know
273
00:09:50,491 --> 00:09:52,531
if this thing is gonna
fit through the bedroom door.
274
00:09:52,621 --> 00:09:53,906
Of course it will.
275
00:09:53,992 --> 00:09:56,679
But if it makes you happy,
I will measure again.
276
00:09:56,901 --> 00:09:58,220
Hmm.
277
00:09:58,375 --> 00:09:59,812
Hmm?
278
00:10:02,862 --> 00:10:03,960
See?
279
00:10:06,842 --> 00:10:08,334
You always record
over my programs...
280
00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:09,646
Whoa!
281
00:10:09,732 --> 00:10:11,287
Gah! Aah!
282
00:10:11,373 --> 00:10:13,271
- Oh!
- Ow!
283
00:10:15,524 --> 00:10:17,141
Okay, no, how about this?
284
00:10:17,227 --> 00:10:20,381
We all band together
to form one big man
285
00:10:20,467 --> 00:10:21,289
to go get the food.
286
00:10:21,374 --> 00:10:22,373
- No! - Okay,
- How's that supposed to work?
287
00:10:22,459 --> 00:10:24,396
Back to back, um, and...
and then link arms.
288
00:10:24,482 --> 00:10:26,498
- Okay.
- Turn around, give me your arm.
289
00:10:26,590 --> 00:10:28,068
See, look?
Like this, all right?
290
00:10:28,154 --> 00:10:30,482
- Do we look big and scary?
- Well, I think so.
291
00:10:30,568 --> 00:10:32,313
Let's move towards the door.
292
00:10:34,693 --> 00:10:35,951
Okay.
293
00:10:36,393 --> 00:10:37,920
Nice and easy.
294
00:10:38,376 --> 00:10:42,982
We're just one big man
out for a walk in the woods.
295
00:10:43,301 --> 00:10:44,450
Scatter!
296
00:10:44,723 --> 00:10:46,298
Aah!
297
00:10:47,654 --> 00:10:49,333
We made it. Oh!
298
00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:51,178
Wait!
Where's Mitchell?
299
00:10:51,264 --> 00:10:52,200
He didn't make it!
300
00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:53,584
One of you two
need to go get him!
301
00:10:53,669 --> 00:10:55,380
I'm better staying here
as a bear decoy.
302
00:10:55,466 --> 00:10:56,818
I give off
a natural musk.
303
00:10:56,904 --> 00:10:59,022
Birds land on me all the time.
Squirrels eat out of my hand.
304
00:10:59,107 --> 00:11:01,693
Well, I can't go!
Lily needs at least one living parent!
305
00:11:02,504 --> 00:11:03,700
Wait!
306
00:11:04,483 --> 00:11:05,740
How do we know
it's not the bear?
307
00:11:05,825 --> 00:11:07,163
It's me!
308
00:11:07,598 --> 00:11:09,257
You just left me!
309
00:11:09,343 --> 00:11:10,827
Oh, you weren't out there
that long.
310
00:11:10,913 --> 00:11:12,007
You didn't get the food?!
311
00:11:12,093 --> 00:11:13,749
I almost was food!
312
00:11:13,835 --> 00:11:16,132
Okay, I-I wish I never even
came on this stupid trip!
313
00:11:16,218 --> 00:11:17,249
Well, who forced you?
314
00:11:17,335 --> 00:11:18,639
Gloria!
315
00:11:23,196 --> 00:11:24,681
It's my delivery ankle.
316
00:11:24,766 --> 00:11:26,124
It's really bad, dudes.
317
00:11:26,210 --> 00:11:29,194
It was already weak from
your paintball injury, Carl.
318
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:30,585
I told you
to get it checked out,
319
00:11:30,671 --> 00:11:32,272
but you and doctors.
320
00:11:33,397 --> 00:11:35,210
Okay, fine,
I know him a little.
321
00:11:35,296 --> 00:11:36,910
When it rains,
it pours, huh?
322
00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:38,952
- Margaret-Anne left me this morning.
- Aw!
323
00:11:39,038 --> 00:11:41,035
Then my dad called me "Craig"
on the phone again.
324
00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:42,564
That's the name
of his new son.
325
00:11:42,686 --> 00:11:44,773
Oh, God. Carl,
can we at least drive you home?
326
00:11:44,859 --> 00:11:46,171
Not now.
327
00:11:46,257 --> 00:11:49,186
I have 10 pizzas going to my enemies,
the Sigmas.
328
00:11:49,272 --> 00:11:51,436
Those rich kids get their
kicks taking advantage
329
00:11:51,522 --> 00:11:52,812
of our "30 Minutes or it's Free"
policy...
330
00:11:52,897 --> 00:11:54,788
use every trick in the
book to slow me down.
331
00:11:54,925 --> 00:11:56,879
Well, not tonight,
Chad and Chip.
332
00:11:56,983 --> 00:11:58,186
Not to... Aaaah!
333
00:11:58,272 --> 00:11:59,980
The bone's got to be
sticking out, right?
334
00:12:00,065 --> 00:12:01,952
No, it's not even swollen.
335
00:12:02,441 --> 00:12:04,352
Look, Carl,
we've all had rough days.
336
00:12:04,438 --> 00:12:06,164
Why don't you let us finish
this delivery for you?
337
00:12:06,249 --> 00:12:08,160
Okay, but we've only got,
like, 10 minutes.
338
00:12:08,246 --> 00:12:09,522
Let's go, then!
Come here.
339
00:12:09,608 --> 00:12:10,769
- Okay.
- Come on!
340
00:12:10,854 --> 00:12:12,827
It'll feel good to get
something right today.
341
00:12:12,913 --> 00:12:15,608
Plus, I wouldn't mind sticking
it to some preppy, white jerks.
342
00:12:15,694 --> 00:12:18,838
Hey! That life comes with its
own problems!
343
00:12:23,537 --> 00:12:25,046
Don't be mad, Dad.
344
00:12:25,132 --> 00:12:26,522
Gloria was just worried
about you.
345
00:12:26,608 --> 00:12:27,811
I don't want to talk about it.
346
00:12:27,897 --> 00:12:29,694
Let's just have a drink
and be quiet.
347
00:12:32,688 --> 00:12:34,624
Lot of colors in that fire,
huh?
348
00:12:35,109 --> 00:12:37,100
Red, green...
349
00:12:37,186 --> 00:12:38,757
- yellow, blue...
- Geez. Okay.
350
00:12:38,843 --> 00:12:41,477
What is this yammering with you?!
Seriously!
351
00:12:41,563 --> 00:12:42,921
I don't know.
352
00:12:44,144 --> 00:12:47,374
I guess I just don't like
being alone with my own thoughts.
353
00:12:48,281 --> 00:12:50,499
Maybe it's because I have
a couple of grandkids on the way,
354
00:12:50,584 --> 00:12:52,374
but now, if...
if things get too quiet,
355
00:12:52,460 --> 00:12:54,639
my mind goes
to a dark place fast.
356
00:12:54,944 --> 00:12:56,991
I start to worry about
the people that I love
357
00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:58,997
and all the bad things
that could happen to them.
358
00:12:59,639 --> 00:13:02,952
I suppose talking...
pushes those thoughts out
359
00:13:03,038 --> 00:13:04,595
and helps me feel okay.
360
00:13:05,187 --> 00:13:06,218
I get it.
361
00:13:06,304 --> 00:13:07,705
We can all spiral.
362
00:13:07,884 --> 00:13:09,542
But you can't talk
your way out of it.
363
00:13:09,628 --> 00:13:11,702
You got to think
your way out of it.
364
00:13:11,952 --> 00:13:14,147
You know,
find a happy place.
365
00:13:14,233 --> 00:13:15,372
Try this.
366
00:13:15,499 --> 00:13:18,077
30 seconds,
no talking. Go.
367
00:13:34,626 --> 00:13:36,240
- Buddy, where are you?
- I'm back. Yep.
368
00:13:36,481 --> 00:13:38,593
You know, I think
we can learn a lot from this guy,
369
00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:39,679
because it's not the...
370
00:13:39,804 --> 00:13:42,546
the bears out there
that we're afraid of.
371
00:13:42,632 --> 00:13:44,061
It's the bears
in our lives...
372
00:13:44,147 --> 00:13:46,327
the fear
that keeps us up at night.
373
00:13:46,413 --> 00:13:47,933
And I think
that's an interesting topic
374
00:13:48,102 --> 00:13:50,335
we can return to
once I change into
375
00:13:50,421 --> 00:13:51,602
my "Fireside Chat" look.
376
00:13:51,687 --> 00:13:53,179
Another wardrobe change?
377
00:13:53,358 --> 00:13:55,311
You're like a sultan's bride
on her wedding day.
378
00:13:55,397 --> 00:13:56,843
Go ahead...
make fun of me.
379
00:13:56,990 --> 00:13:58,350
I like my outfits.
380
00:13:58,436 --> 00:13:59,585
Why so many?
381
00:13:59,822 --> 00:14:01,382
Yeah, I guess
when I was a kid,
382
00:14:01,468 --> 00:14:03,186
I realized
I wasn't ever gonna fit in,
383
00:14:03,272 --> 00:14:04,983
so I decided
to stand out.
384
00:14:05,272 --> 00:14:06,944
I embraced
my flamboyance
385
00:14:07,030 --> 00:14:09,231
to let the world know
their insults won't hurt me.
386
00:14:09,366 --> 00:14:12,030
Want to make a joke about me?
Go ahead, 'cause I'm in on it.
387
00:14:13,358 --> 00:14:14,999
That's really beautiful, Cam.
388
00:14:15,389 --> 00:14:16,788
And you're not alone.
389
00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:20,227
Growing up, we were all insecure
nerds in our own way.
390
00:14:22,444 --> 00:14:23,835
I was cool.
391
00:14:26,412 --> 00:14:28,350
What? I thought
we were sharing.
392
00:14:28,688 --> 00:14:31,835
That's very brave, Cam.
That's good stuff.
393
00:14:35,276 --> 00:14:37,468
Are you crazy?!
I shouldn't be the one driving!
394
00:14:37,605 --> 00:14:40,030
There is no time to argue!
Just go! Come on!
395
00:14:41,631 --> 00:14:43,537
Thanks so much for making me
part of your group.
396
00:14:43,708 --> 00:14:46,404
It's not every day
you make four new best friends.
397
00:14:47,605 --> 00:14:49,262
Why are they
going so slow?!
398
00:14:49,347 --> 00:14:50,621
I can't get past them!
399
00:14:50,706 --> 00:14:52,405
This is one of Sigma's tactics.
400
00:14:52,490 --> 00:14:53,750
They track my location
on the app
401
00:14:53,835 --> 00:14:55,303
and send pledges
to try to slow me down.
402
00:14:55,388 --> 00:14:56,716
Ugh! What am I gonna do?!
403
00:14:56,903 --> 00:14:58,049
I'll handle this.
404
00:14:58,135 --> 00:15:00,132
Carl, I'm taking your
paintball guns!
405
00:15:00,732 --> 00:15:03,322
Move! Or I move you!
406
00:15:07,562 --> 00:15:09,335
I do still have my edge!
407
00:15:09,421 --> 00:15:10,421
Yes!
408
00:15:11,275 --> 00:15:13,059
Will you join my
paintball team?
409
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:15,364
What is that?!
410
00:15:15,450 --> 00:15:17,170
Field of Minions.
Classic Sigmas.
411
00:15:17,255 --> 00:15:19,655
Don't get distracted by the cuteness.
We only have five minutes.
412
00:15:19,740 --> 00:15:21,015
Just go around them.
413
00:15:26,221 --> 00:15:27,539
Oh, my God, I did it!
414
00:15:27,624 --> 00:15:28,812
And you're all still in the car!
415
00:15:28,897 --> 00:15:30,803
Okay, now, we can't give
them any reason to say
416
00:15:30,889 --> 00:15:31,834
that we didn't fill the order perfectly,
417
00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:33,249
so check the pizzas,
make sure they didn't shift.
418
00:15:33,334 --> 00:15:35,959
Oh, Haley, I'm sure you're
worrying about nothing...
419
00:15:36,045 --> 00:15:37,054
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
420
00:15:41,386 --> 00:15:43,085
Carl, do you have a pizza slicer?
421
00:15:43,170 --> 00:15:45,626
Only the commemorative one
I got for 10 years of service.
422
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,595
Give it to me. I have a vision.
423
00:15:47,793 --> 00:15:50,399
Shaq and Hendrix never got past
their blind spots.
424
00:15:50,485 --> 00:15:52,047
Maybe they didn't
want it enough.
425
00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:54,656
Turning 9 pizzas into 10
was a simple matter
426
00:15:54,742 --> 00:15:56,570
of removing one slice
from each pie,
427
00:15:56,656 --> 00:15:58,282
then trimming off
a V-shaped portion of pizza
428
00:15:58,367 --> 00:15:59,736
from each
of the remaining slices,
429
00:15:59,821 --> 00:16:01,931
turning them from 36-degree
angles to 40-degree angles,
430
00:16:02,016 --> 00:16:03,478
then putting together
the 40-degree angles
431
00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:05,215
into nine slightly smaller pies.
432
00:16:05,301 --> 00:16:07,595
After that,
one had only to repurpose
433
00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:09,549
the nine
previously removed slices
434
00:16:09,641 --> 00:16:10,882
into a 10th pie.
435
00:16:11,937 --> 00:16:13,617
And... 10!
436
00:16:13,703 --> 00:16:14,750
It worked!
437
00:16:14,836 --> 00:16:15,852
It really did.
438
00:16:15,938 --> 00:16:17,365
I do have a visual brain.
439
00:16:17,450 --> 00:16:18,266
That was your thing?
440
00:16:18,352 --> 00:16:20,953
I do not miss having
white-people problems.
441
00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:23,273
We're here! I did it!
442
00:16:23,359 --> 00:16:25,690
We only have a minute to get
the pizzas inside. Let's go!
443
00:16:25,775 --> 00:16:28,141
Oh, wait, wait, wait!
Uh, the frat has a video doorbell.
444
00:16:28,227 --> 00:16:30,345
If they see it's a delivery,
they try to run out the clock.
445
00:16:30,430 --> 00:16:32,231
I'll handle this.
446
00:16:33,662 --> 00:16:35,172
Stay on that side.
447
00:16:36,581 --> 00:16:37,642
Yeah?
448
00:16:37,728 --> 00:16:39,725
Hi. Um...
449
00:16:39,811 --> 00:16:42,529
I go to U of A,
and I'm super drunk.
450
00:16:42,615 --> 00:16:45,504
Is there a place where I
can sober up for the night?
451
00:16:46,886 --> 00:16:50,360
At least my looks can still
get me into a frat house.
452
00:16:50,512 --> 00:16:51,953
Okay, guys, go, go!
453
00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:54,598
10 pizzas on time.
454
00:16:54,684 --> 00:16:55,860
Pay up!
455
00:16:55,976 --> 00:16:57,063
You guys with Carl?
456
00:16:57,149 --> 00:16:58,985
We are Carl.
457
00:17:01,617 --> 00:17:03,524
Come on, hurry up!
A bet's a bet!
458
00:17:03,610 --> 00:17:05,742
I told you I could stand
on one leg longer than you!
459
00:17:05,828 --> 00:17:08,024
You're the only one
whose balance gets better
460
00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:09,506
after drinking
a jug of whiskey.
461
00:17:09,592 --> 00:17:12,075
All right.
My follower is gonna love this!
462
00:17:12,161 --> 00:17:13,334
Everybody say "Cheese!"
463
00:17:13,420 --> 00:17:14,545
- Cheese.
- Yes.
464
00:17:14,646 --> 00:17:16,132
Okay, now,
that is how you build a brand.
465
00:17:16,217 --> 00:17:18,257
Well, I guess we should kill
the rest of this whiskey.
466
00:17:18,342 --> 00:17:20,218
But then we'll have nothing
to serve the murderers
467
00:17:20,303 --> 00:17:22,693
- when they arrive.
- You know, you joke,
468
00:17:22,779 --> 00:17:25,287
but you have a certain
paranoia about you.
469
00:17:25,373 --> 00:17:26,646
What...
What's behind that?
470
00:17:26,732 --> 00:17:27,490
Well...
471
00:17:27,576 --> 00:17:30,037
Ooh! Are we about to hear
about Mitchell's bear?
472
00:17:30,123 --> 00:17:31,732
Uh, okay.
It... It's, um...
473
00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:33,842
I've never told anyone this,
but, uh,
474
00:17:33,951 --> 00:17:36,162
a fortune teller
once predicted
475
00:17:36,248 --> 00:17:38,818
that I would not live
to see my 46th winter.
476
00:17:38,904 --> 00:17:41,623
Was that that kook that used
to live next door to us?
477
00:17:41,709 --> 00:17:42,756
She's nuts.
478
00:17:42,842 --> 00:17:44,048
She told your mother
she was gonna
479
00:17:44,133 --> 00:17:45,318
win a Tony one day.
480
00:17:45,404 --> 00:17:47,459
But she was right
about a lot of other things.
481
00:17:47,545 --> 00:17:49,302
She said that I'd
become a lawyer.
482
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:52,076
She said that I would
marry a clown one day.
483
00:17:52,223 --> 00:17:53,873
Laughed a long time
about that one.
484
00:17:53,959 --> 00:17:54,896
Why?
485
00:17:54,982 --> 00:17:57,130
Anyway,
I-I guess my "bear"
486
00:17:57,216 --> 00:17:58,757
is the fear
of dying young.
487
00:17:59,028 --> 00:18:00,771
Uh, I mean,
if that fortune teller's right,
488
00:18:00,864 --> 00:18:02,946
I only have
three more years to live.
489
00:18:03,168 --> 00:18:04,739
Well, y-you know what?
The way I see it,
490
00:18:04,825 --> 00:18:06,638
this little curse
is actually a gift...
491
00:18:06,980 --> 00:18:09,435
a reason to live life
to the fullest.
492
00:18:09,521 --> 00:18:10,904
And have no regrets.
493
00:18:11,005 --> 00:18:12,560
Okay, so we're all just accepting
494
00:18:12,646 --> 00:18:14,545
this 46-year thing as true?
495
00:18:14,631 --> 00:18:16,117
We've made our peace with it.
496
00:18:16,322 --> 00:18:17,537
And so should you.
497
00:18:17,623 --> 00:18:20,090
Why not just live your
limited days
498
00:18:20,176 --> 00:18:22,043
with leaving nothing unsaid?
499
00:18:22,225 --> 00:18:24,535
Tell the people who matter
the most how you feel.
500
00:18:24,621 --> 00:18:27,410
I tell you and Lily
I love you every single day.
501
00:18:27,496 --> 00:18:29,168
True. What about Phil?
502
00:18:29,254 --> 00:18:32,129
He did text me with a
"Love ya" this morning.
503
00:18:32,215 --> 00:18:33,433
Close enough.
504
00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:35,161
And your dad?
505
00:18:39,253 --> 00:18:40,925
- Seriously?!
- I just have a hard time
506
00:18:41,011 --> 00:18:43,177
- saying that word to him.
- Which is fine for the both of us.
507
00:18:43,262 --> 00:18:44,691
Okay, well, it sounds like
508
00:18:44,777 --> 00:18:46,793
you might be uncomfortable
with that word, too.
509
00:18:46,879 --> 00:18:48,841
No! I don't have a problem with it.
I use it all the time.
510
00:18:48,926 --> 00:18:50,558
I'm always saying
I love things. I...
511
00:18:50,708 --> 00:18:53,090
I love the feel of toasty
socks out of the microwave.
512
00:18:53,176 --> 00:18:55,937
I love the far-off sound
of a train whistle.
513
00:18:56,023 --> 00:18:57,082
You know, "Ooh!"
514
00:18:57,168 --> 00:18:58,784
What adventure have
they gotten off to?"
515
00:18:58,870 --> 00:19:01,176
I l... I love watching
a baby stretch.
516
00:19:01,262 --> 00:19:03,832
Those are all good things
in your life, Jay, but...
517
00:19:04,318 --> 00:19:05,332
what's your "bear"?
518
00:19:05,418 --> 00:19:06,457
I don't have one.
519
00:19:06,569 --> 00:19:08,222
Oh, come on!
We all told you ours.
520
00:19:08,308 --> 00:19:10,066
Now, when you get to my age,
521
00:19:10,152 --> 00:19:12,558
there are less things
that you're afraid of.
522
00:19:13,173 --> 00:19:14,872
Except maybe...
523
00:19:14,958 --> 00:19:16,832
being a burden to your family.
524
00:19:17,081 --> 00:19:18,449
Which is starting already,
525
00:19:18,535 --> 00:19:21,191
because Gloria forced
you guys to babysit me,
526
00:19:21,356 --> 00:19:24,035
which is why I wanted
to spend the night here
527
00:19:24,231 --> 00:19:28,457
so I could prove I'm not some...
frail old man.
528
00:19:29,241 --> 00:19:30,761
But, if I'm being honest,
529
00:19:30,910 --> 00:19:33,386
that hike gets tougher
for me every year.
530
00:19:34,294 --> 00:19:37,402
And I was relieved that
I didn't have to do it alone.
531
00:19:37,488 --> 00:19:38,972
Oh, Dad.
532
00:19:39,082 --> 00:19:40,441
You could never be
a burden.
533
00:19:40,527 --> 00:19:43,043
Yeah, you're the one who's always
taking care of all of us.
534
00:19:43,129 --> 00:19:45,511
We'd love the chance to return
the favor.
535
00:19:47,370 --> 00:19:49,090
All right. It's getting late.
536
00:19:49,176 --> 00:19:51,324
This mountain pimp
outfit's making me sweat.
537
00:19:51,410 --> 00:19:53,220
Let's...
Let's get some rest.
538
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:55,082
- Good night.
- Good night.
539
00:19:55,168 --> 00:19:56,425
I'll take the sofa.
540
00:19:56,519 --> 00:19:57,905
Sure you're gonna be okay
out here?
541
00:19:57,999 --> 00:19:59,808
- Yeah, I'll be fine.
- Okay.
542
00:20:01,602 --> 00:20:02,728
Do... Do you want me
to grab you
543
00:20:02,813 --> 00:20:04,237
- an extra blanket or something?
- No, no.
544
00:20:04,322 --> 00:20:05,923
I'll get something
if I need it.
545
00:20:06,281 --> 00:20:08,040
Okay. Well...
546
00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:10,955
Good night.
547
00:20:15,736 --> 00:20:16,955
I know.
548
00:20:33,887 --> 00:20:35,699
All right, Dad.
We're ready to go.
549
00:20:35,785 --> 00:20:36,629
Yeah, Jay.
550
00:20:36,715 --> 00:20:38,908
I'm sorry you didn't see
a bald eagle this time around.
551
00:20:39,043 --> 00:20:40,562
Y-Yeah.
It's too bad.
552
00:20:40,647 --> 00:20:43,129
I guess we'll all have to
come back here again next year.
553
00:20:43,215 --> 00:20:44,340
Yeah.
554
00:20:44,426 --> 00:20:46,263
I don't know about you guys,
but I slept great.
555
00:20:46,348 --> 00:20:49,207
That cot was so soft.
I'm not always a sound sleeper.
556
00:20:49,293 --> 00:20:50,710
Been meaning to
try that melatonin.
557
00:20:50,796 --> 00:20:52,168
I hear
it's a real game-changer.
558
00:20:52,254 --> 00:20:53,793
And you can get it anywhere
nowadays.
559
00:20:53,879 --> 00:20:55,403
Has it always been
over-the-counter?
560
00:20:55,489 --> 00:20:57,410
Kind of a funny phrase,
isn't it... "over-the-counter"?