1
00:00:00,119 --> 00:00:01,319
_

2
00:00:02,120 --> 00:00:03,019
Haley, your dad's on the phone.

3
00:00:03,088 --> 00:00:04,487
He says it's urgent.

4
00:00:04,556 --> 00:00:06,322
- He's with a surgeon?
- I think he said "sturgeon."

5
00:00:06,391 --> 00:00:08,391
Cam, is it "surgeon"
or "sturgeon"?

6
00:00:08,460 --> 00:00:11,060
I am ripping these stupid braces
off the second I get home.

7
00:00:11,387 --> 00:00:14,321
Phil, hold on. I'm gonna put
you on speakerphone, okay?

8
00:00:14,390 --> 00:00:15,923
Andy's on his way
to propose to Beth!

9
00:00:15,991 --> 00:00:17,257
We can't hear anything!

10
00:00:17,326 --> 00:00:18,759
Just toss me the phone.

11
00:00:18,828 --> 00:00:20,327
- No! ‭- No, no.
- No, you're right.

12
00:00:20,396 --> 00:00:21,995
We all have our strengths.
I'm a great gift giver.

13
00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:23,597
- Here, Cam.
‭- Oh.

14
00:00:23,666 --> 00:00:25,132
Dad?

15
00:00:25,201 --> 00:00:27,101
Haley, Andy's on his way
to propose to Beth!

16
00:00:27,169 --> 00:00:28,202
Aww!

17
00:00:28,270 --> 00:00:30,170
- That's very sweet!
- It's not sweet!

18
00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:32,506
Haley and Andy love each other,
but they don't know it!

19
00:00:32,575 --> 00:00:34,174
- Whoa.
- Is that true, honey?

20
00:00:33,761 --> 00:00:35,494
Dad, what makes you think
he's in love with me?

21
00:00:35,563 --> 00:00:37,363
I could tell by the way
he hugged you goodbye.

22
00:00:37,398 --> 00:00:39,164
Phil, are you sure about this?

23
00:00:39,233 --> 00:00:42,034
Claire, I think I know the look
of love in another man's eyes.

24
00:00:42,573 --> 00:00:45,006
This is crazy.
Should I call him?

25
00:00:45,075 --> 00:00:47,235
His phone's off, but he said
he was going to the beach.

26
00:00:47,244 --> 00:00:49,344
‭I know what beach he likes.

27
00:00:49,413 --> 00:00:52,114
I thought you were
the "beach" he likes.

28
00:00:56,420 --> 00:00:58,186
Oh, god, there they are.

29
00:00:58,255 --> 00:01:00,155
Should I do this?
I shouldn't do this.

30
00:01:00,224 --> 00:01:01,423
I'm gonna do this.

31
00:01:01,492 --> 00:01:02,491
W-- honey, honey,
‭wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

32
00:01:02,559 --> 00:01:06,328
You got to be
really sure of this.

33
00:01:06,397 --> 00:01:09,865
You're gonna go over there
and break them up for what?

34
00:01:09,933 --> 00:01:14,069
To hang out or to date
until the next guy comes along?

35
00:01:14,138 --> 00:01:15,437
Who knows?

36
00:01:15,506 --> 00:01:18,039
But shouldn't we get a chance
to find out what we are?

37
00:01:18,108 --> 00:01:21,042
I'm just saying
look down the road a little.

38
00:01:21,111 --> 00:01:24,212
You're 21,
‭and that looks like a guy

39
00:01:24,281 --> 00:01:26,081
who is ready to settle down.

40
00:01:34,391 --> 00:01:36,324
‭ Well, um...

41
00:01:36,393 --> 00:01:39,294
I guess it's decided for me.

42
00:01:39,363 --> 00:01:41,329
I feel like such an idiot.

43
00:01:41,398 --> 00:01:43,532
No. Honey, no, no, no, no, no.

44
00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:45,734
You have nothing
to be ashamed of.

45
00:01:45,803 --> 00:01:47,235
Oh, god!
Here they come! Hide!

46
00:01:47,304 --> 00:01:48,405
Just -- oh...

47
00:01:58,929 --> 00:02:02,262
Sync and corrections by gloriabg
www.addic7ed.com

48
00:02:02,825 --> 00:02:04,025
_

49
00:02:05,622 --> 00:02:08,123
Oh, god. Oh.

50
00:02:08,192 --> 00:02:09,291
Daddy looks tense.

51
00:02:09,359 --> 00:02:10,993
He's just paying bills.

52
00:02:11,862 --> 00:02:13,328
Is everything okay, honey?

53
00:02:13,407 --> 00:02:14,506
Oh, you walked over here.

54
00:02:14,575 --> 00:02:16,108
I just thought
you Uber-ed everywhere.

55
00:02:16,177 --> 00:02:17,910
- Okay.
‭- Okay, I got to breathe.

56
00:02:17,978 --> 00:02:19,444
That's still free, isn't it?

57
00:02:19,513 --> 00:02:20,746
Mitchell, it's not that bad.

58
00:02:20,814 --> 00:02:22,581
Really? Because I haven't
worked in weeks.

59
00:02:22,650 --> 00:02:24,082
I have no prospects.

60
00:02:24,151 --> 00:02:25,751
We're living off
‭of a gym teacher's salary,

61
00:02:25,819 --> 00:02:27,920
and --
And somehow I let you

62
00:02:27,988 --> 00:02:29,588
talk me into buying
the apartment upstairs.

63
00:02:29,657 --> 00:02:31,757
What's going on? Are we poor?

64
00:02:31,825 --> 00:02:34,092
No, while other daddy
looks for a job,

65
00:02:34,161 --> 00:02:35,260
I'm gonna be taking on some work

66
00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:36,862
as a summertime
driver's Ed teacher.

67
00:02:36,931 --> 00:02:38,330
How much can that pay?

68
00:02:38,399 --> 00:02:39,498
Every little bit helps.

69
00:02:39,567 --> 00:02:40,933
And besides, Mitchell,
before you know it,

70
00:02:41,001 --> 00:02:42,521
you're gonna be back
in a stuffy office

71
00:02:42,570 --> 00:02:44,069
with some stuffy lawyers,

72
00:02:44,138 --> 00:02:46,805
wishing you had taken advantage
of this time.

73
00:02:46,874 --> 00:02:47,940
Am I right?

74
00:02:48,008 --> 00:02:49,808
Well, that doesn't
not sound like me.

75
00:02:49,877 --> 00:02:51,643
Exactly, so why don't
you take this chance...

76
00:02:51,712 --> 00:02:54,313
...to do something fun, find a hobby?

77
00:02:54,381 --> 00:02:57,149
You know, every time we go
to a gallery, you always say,

78
00:02:57,218 --> 00:02:58,698
"I could paint something
that stupid."

79
00:02:58,719 --> 00:03:00,219
Well, prove it.

80
00:03:00,287 --> 00:03:02,654
You know what? I have.
I've always wanted to paint.

81
00:03:02,723 --> 00:03:04,990
And the place upstairs is
gonna be a rental gold mine --

82
00:03:05,059 --> 00:03:07,359
Once we paint it, we furnish it,
we fix the electric,

83
00:03:07,428 --> 00:03:08,660
redo the plumbing,

84
00:03:08,729 --> 00:03:11,663
and figure out why that
brown spot won't stop growing.

85
00:03:11,732 --> 00:03:13,999
It's growing?

86
00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:17,202
Wow, did you two really just
waste your entire day quilting?

87
00:03:17,271 --> 00:03:20,038
We had a wonderful time,
didn't we, sweetie?

88
00:03:20,107 --> 00:03:21,873
I'm not crying anymore.

89
00:03:21,942 --> 00:03:23,709
To help get her mind
off of Andy,

90
00:03:23,777 --> 00:03:25,210
Haley and I have
been making a quilt

91
00:03:25,279 --> 00:03:27,546
out of all her old clothes...

92
00:03:27,615 --> 00:03:30,048
And some stuff I need Phil
to stop wearing.

93
00:03:30,117 --> 00:03:33,385
Oh, cool. That square is the
same pattern as my kangol hat.

94
00:03:33,454 --> 00:03:35,887
Can you believe how gorgeous
it is outside?

95
00:03:35,956 --> 00:03:37,656
And now it's gorgeous inside.

96
00:03:38,792 --> 00:03:40,125
Because you're inside.
Was that clear?

97
00:03:40,194 --> 00:03:42,327
Hey, do you want to go quiz me
on the periodic table?

98
00:03:42,396 --> 00:03:43,562
Oxygen potassium.

99
00:03:43,631 --> 00:03:46,064
Ohh, he used the elements
to say "okay."

100
00:03:47,568 --> 00:03:49,835
Oh, well, that was fun for me.

101
00:03:49,903 --> 00:03:51,903
Mom, can we drink now?

102
00:03:51,972 --> 00:03:53,872
- Honey, it's lunchtime.
- Ohh.

103
00:03:53,941 --> 00:03:55,240
That's a "yes."

104
00:03:57,077 --> 00:03:59,578
Why do I feel like
you're enjoying this?

105
00:03:59,647 --> 00:04:02,314
- What?
‭- Sad Haley needs her mommy again.

106
00:04:02,383 --> 00:04:03,448
Oh, that's ridiculous.

107
00:04:03,517 --> 00:04:04,983
I'm just helping her
channel her broken heart

108
00:04:05,052 --> 00:04:06,451
into something more positive.

109
00:04:06,520 --> 00:04:08,954
Please, that's the saddest
blanket since the AIDS quilt.

110
00:04:09,023 --> 00:04:11,523
Haley's wallowing in self-pity,
and you're feeding off of it.

111
00:04:11,592 --> 00:04:12,991
You don't know what
you're talking about.

112
00:04:13,060 --> 00:04:14,860
Mom, I'm just gonna
go take a nap.

113
00:04:14,928 --> 00:04:16,328
Oh, sweetheart, do you
want me to snuggle with you

114
00:04:16,397 --> 00:04:17,429
till you fall asleep?

115
00:04:17,498 --> 00:04:19,464
Okay, that's it.
Pity party's over.

116
00:04:19,533 --> 00:04:22,267
Time for some Dunphy fun.
We are going to the movies.

117
00:04:22,336 --> 00:04:24,202
When was the last time
you showered?

118
00:04:24,271 --> 00:04:25,470
What day is it?

119
00:04:25,539 --> 00:04:26,539
We will wait.

120
00:04:27,841 --> 00:04:30,409
I know you can't tell me,
but that B. Willis Jungle Gym --

121
00:04:30,477 --> 00:04:32,077
That's Bruce Willis, right?

122
00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:33,445
His kid goes here?

123
00:04:33,514 --> 00:04:36,281
Well, we do pride ourselves
on privacy here at Davenport,

124
00:04:36,350 --> 00:04:39,518
but, uh, you may have
a "sixth sense" about this.

125
00:04:39,586 --> 00:04:40,652
I'll be damned.

126
00:04:40,721 --> 00:04:41,841
He looks like the kind of guy

127
00:04:41,889 --> 00:04:43,121
you want to have
a beer with, you know?

128
00:04:43,190 --> 00:04:45,691
We have one educator
for every four children --

129
00:04:45,759 --> 00:04:46,958
I have a question.

130
00:04:47,027 --> 00:04:48,794
Uh, I attend high school
with one of your graduates,

131
00:04:48,862 --> 00:04:50,429
a Theodore Durkas.

132
00:04:50,497 --> 00:04:53,098
Did you turn him into a monster,
or was he always like that?

133
00:04:53,167 --> 00:04:54,933
I actually remember
Teddy Durkas.

134
00:04:55,002 --> 00:04:56,002
He was a lovely boy.

135
00:04:56,070 --> 00:04:57,202
I'll give him your regards

136
00:04:57,271 --> 00:04:58,970
next time he's making
one of my nurples purple.

137
00:05:00,974 --> 00:05:02,541
Ay, Joe, what did you do?!

138
00:05:02,609 --> 00:05:04,176
Oh, it's not his fault.

139
00:05:04,244 --> 00:05:06,244
These cubbies were donated
by a former parent

140
00:05:06,313 --> 00:05:07,779
who fancied himself a carpenter.

141
00:05:07,848 --> 00:05:10,382
I can't say who,
but it is ironic

142
00:05:10,451 --> 00:05:13,251
that he couldn't use a hammer,
and now we "can't touch this."

143
00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,087
You keep saying you can't say,
and then you say.

144
00:05:15,155 --> 00:05:16,888
It's just nice to talk
to adults.

145
00:05:16,957 --> 00:05:19,691
Hey, we're sold.
You want Joe? He's yours.

146
00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:22,394
It was very smart of you
to get a jump on next year.

147
00:05:22,463 --> 00:05:24,496
Next year? What --
What about this year?

148
00:05:24,565 --> 00:05:27,132
Oh, uh, we enroll
at least a year out.

149
00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:29,334
And even then, there's
a significant waiting list.

150
00:05:29,403 --> 00:05:31,436
You're kidding.
I'm sorry, Mr. Pritchett.

151
00:05:31,505 --> 00:05:32,938
Uh...

152
00:05:33,006 --> 00:05:35,207
You could try The Learnin' Barn.

153
00:05:35,275 --> 00:05:37,309
Ah, yes.
That sounds very nice.

154
00:05:37,378 --> 00:05:39,144
The Learnin' Barn sounds nice?

155
00:05:39,213 --> 00:05:41,246
Yes, in my village,
only the richest kids

156
00:05:41,315 --> 00:05:43,949
were allowed to learn
inside the barn.

157
00:05:45,017 --> 00:05:46,918
Hope you guys like dinosaurs.

158
00:05:46,987 --> 00:05:50,622
I got us tickets to "The Second
Best Exotic Marigold Hotel."

159
00:05:50,691 --> 00:05:51,890
I know you're kidding,

160
00:05:51,959 --> 00:05:55,060
but I found the first one
incredibly moving.

161
00:05:55,129 --> 00:05:57,562
I never realized how many people
hold hands in malls.

162
00:05:57,631 --> 00:05:59,331
And now that gays
are legal or whatever,

163
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:00,999
it's basically everyone.

164
00:06:01,068 --> 00:06:02,834
Oh, honey, I'll hold your hand.
Come here.

165
00:06:02,903 --> 00:06:04,636
Is that Dylan?

166
00:06:05,672 --> 00:06:07,572
No. No, that's --
‭that's definitely not Dylan.

167
00:06:07,641 --> 00:06:08,641
Dylan!

168
00:06:09,676 --> 00:06:11,443
Hello, Dunphy family!

169
00:06:11,512 --> 00:06:12,512
What the what?

170
00:06:12,579 --> 00:06:14,312
How you doing, buddy?

171
00:06:14,381 --> 00:06:16,915
Life's a roller coaster,
but I'm tall enough to ride.

172
00:06:16,984 --> 00:06:18,216
True dat.

173
00:06:18,285 --> 00:06:19,951
Haley, you look
as yummy as ever.

174
00:06:20,020 --> 00:06:22,554
Thanks.
What's going on?

175
00:06:22,623 --> 00:06:24,055
So, I'm designing
t-shirts now,

176
00:06:24,124 --> 00:06:26,258
and I'm trying to get
the stores to sell them.

177
00:06:26,326 --> 00:06:27,326
I'm wearing one.

178
00:06:27,327 --> 00:06:28,427
"Lie"?
‭"live."

179
00:06:28,495 --> 00:06:29,495
The neck is the "v."

180
00:06:29,530 --> 00:06:30,729
Game changer.

181
00:06:30,798 --> 00:06:32,998
Yeah, and I've got all
these great "V" words.

182
00:06:33,066 --> 00:06:34,633
"Love," "dove" --

183
00:06:34,701 --> 00:06:35,701
- Leave.
- ‭..."Governor."

184
00:06:35,702 --> 00:06:38,470
Wow, that is such a cool idea.

185
00:06:38,539 --> 00:06:39,805
It's so good to see you.

186
00:06:39,873 --> 00:06:41,706
Do you want to get
some coffee sometime?

187
00:06:41,775 --> 00:06:43,542
I'm not doing anything
right now.

188
00:06:43,610 --> 00:06:45,477
Uh, movie.

189
00:06:45,546 --> 00:06:47,979
Nice try, but not
‭all "V" words work, Mrs. D.

190
00:06:49,183 --> 00:06:52,284
Have fun, you two.

191
00:06:52,352 --> 00:06:54,353
"Hey, Dylan!"

192
00:06:56,630 --> 00:06:57,630
_

193
00:06:57,654 --> 00:06:58,454
Mitchell, are you aware

194
00:06:58,523 --> 00:07:00,356
our daughter's eating
a ketchup sandwich?

195
00:07:00,414 --> 00:07:01,579
Good, she found something.

196
00:07:01,648 --> 00:07:03,315
So, you didn't go
grocery shopping today.

197
00:07:03,383 --> 00:07:04,916
I am gonna go, but after yoga.

198
00:07:04,985 --> 00:07:06,551
Hey -- hey,
you should come with me,

199
00:07:06,620 --> 00:07:08,019
'cause you seem really tense.

200
00:07:08,088 --> 00:07:10,121
Oh, well, maybe they have
a five-minute class

201
00:07:10,190 --> 00:07:12,357
I could sneak in between
football camp and Driver's Ed?

202
00:07:13,660 --> 00:07:16,161
No, I'm very proud of you
and your grapefruit.

203
00:07:16,229 --> 00:07:18,563
- Chrysler Building.
- Mitchell really embraced

204
00:07:18,632 --> 00:07:19,664
this whole
"take a little break" thing

205
00:07:19,733 --> 00:07:20,832
far more than I expected.

206
00:07:20,901 --> 00:07:22,801
But for years,
he supported both of us

207
00:07:22,869 --> 00:07:24,903
while I pursued my passions --

208
00:07:24,972 --> 00:07:27,639
Photography, hip-hop dancing,
fox hunting.

209
00:07:27,708 --> 00:07:31,343
So I couldn't be the one
to tell him to get a job.

210
00:07:31,411 --> 00:07:33,545
But maybe somebody else could.

211
00:07:36,883 --> 00:07:39,617
Hey, Charlie?
It's -- it's, uh, Cameron.

212
00:07:39,686 --> 00:07:41,419
My husband Mitchell
used to work for you.

213
00:07:41,488 --> 00:07:42,721
Oh!

214
00:07:42,789 --> 00:07:43,688
I remember you.

215
00:07:43,757 --> 00:07:45,590
Yeah, what a nice surprise.

216
00:07:45,659 --> 00:07:47,726
I know! Crazy!

217
00:07:47,794 --> 00:07:49,961
Crazy like that fox
I told Mitchell was chicken.

218
00:07:51,164 --> 00:07:53,398
Was it clear?
I-I stalked Charlie.

219
00:07:53,467 --> 00:07:54,699
I can't believe it.

220
00:07:54,768 --> 00:07:56,935
Mitchell and I were just talking
about you last night.

221
00:07:57,004 --> 00:07:58,236
How are you?

222
00:07:58,305 --> 00:08:00,265
Well, I don't want to
burden you with my problems.

223
00:08:00,307 --> 00:08:02,774
Uh, I think
I've outgrown my boat.

224
00:08:02,843 --> 00:08:03,875
Oh.

225
00:08:03,944 --> 00:08:05,477
- Hey, how is Mitchell?
- He's fine.

226
00:08:05,545 --> 00:08:07,445
Actually, he's fielding
a few job offers right now,

227
00:08:07,514 --> 00:08:08,747
and he's running into problems

228
00:08:08,815 --> 00:08:11,116
because he keeps comparing
everyone to you.

229
00:08:11,184 --> 00:08:12,184
Huh.

230
00:08:12,252 --> 00:08:13,218
Sometimes I think the only thing

231
00:08:13,286 --> 00:08:14,719
that's gonna make him
feel better

232
00:08:14,788 --> 00:08:17,756
is if you offered him
another job.

233
00:08:17,824 --> 00:08:18,990
What the hell?
I'll do it.

234
00:08:19,059 --> 00:08:21,026
Really?
Yeah, I'm getting a new boat.

235
00:08:21,094 --> 00:08:23,461
- Oh.
‭- And I will talk to Mitchell.

236
00:08:23,530 --> 00:08:25,230
I miss that $3 bill.

237
00:08:27,234 --> 00:08:29,200
You scheduled your breakup?

238
00:08:29,269 --> 00:08:31,636
Yes, Labor Day.
‭That's when I leave for school.

239
00:08:31,705 --> 00:08:34,039
86% of long-distance
relationships end in failure.

240
00:08:34,107 --> 00:08:36,474
It's the only logical
course of action.

241
00:08:36,543 --> 00:08:39,210
That is the least romantic thing
I've ever heard.

242
00:08:39,279 --> 00:08:40,645
Stay together.

243
00:08:40,714 --> 00:08:42,113
Wrong. Break up.

244
00:08:42,182 --> 00:08:44,549
College is the sexiest
candy store in the world.

245
00:08:44,618 --> 00:08:46,518
You don't want to show up
with your jaws wired shut.

246
00:08:46,586 --> 00:08:48,720
No, take it from Haley and me.

247
00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:50,655
It's hard to be apart
and then together

248
00:08:50,724 --> 00:08:52,590
and then apart and then together

249
00:08:52,659 --> 00:08:55,026
and then apart and then
turned down by the Marines

250
00:08:55,095 --> 00:08:56,461
and then together.

251
00:08:56,530 --> 00:08:59,697
Ugh. I can't believe we've got
that dodo back in our lives.

252
00:08:59,766 --> 00:09:01,032
At least Haley's happy.

253
00:09:01,101 --> 00:09:03,334
Honey, could you at least
take that t-shirt off?

254
00:09:03,403 --> 00:09:06,271
They loved it at the deli.
They were kvelling.

255
00:09:06,339 --> 00:09:07,339
Hey-oh!

256
00:09:07,374 --> 00:09:08,640
- Andy!
‭- Hi.

257
00:09:08,708 --> 00:09:10,575
Sorry to interrupt.
I just want to get these to you.

258
00:09:10,644 --> 00:09:12,343
- Here is the closing on Baywood.
- Awesome.

259
00:09:12,412 --> 00:09:15,447
And this is the Johnsons' offer,
all set for signatures.

260
00:09:15,515 --> 00:09:16,748
You've done a real Mitzvah, buddy.

261
00:09:16,817 --> 00:09:18,683
I hope that's good.

262
00:09:18,752 --> 00:09:20,318
Oh, hey.

263
00:09:20,387 --> 00:09:21,653
Hey.

264
00:09:21,721 --> 00:09:24,289
I -- it's been awhile
since I've seen you.

265
00:09:24,357 --> 00:09:26,191
Yeah, I've been putting
a lot of hours in,

266
00:09:26,259 --> 00:09:28,159
trying to earn extra money
for this wedding.

267
00:09:28,228 --> 00:09:30,862
Hola. I'm Dylan,
Haley's boyfriend.

268
00:09:30,931 --> 00:09:32,397
Uh, hey. I'm Andy.

269
00:09:32,466 --> 00:09:35,567
I didn't realize you two
are back together.

270
00:09:35,635 --> 00:09:36,635
Oh, yeah.

271
00:09:36,670 --> 00:09:38,470
We're like magnets...

272
00:09:38,538 --> 00:09:40,905
...that sometimes take a break
to date other magnets.

273
00:09:40,974 --> 00:09:42,841
What happened was
we were together,

274
00:09:42,909 --> 00:09:44,642
and then we were apart.

275
00:09:44,711 --> 00:09:46,778
Thank you so much
‭for making time for us today.

276
00:09:46,847 --> 00:09:48,713
Oh, I'm sorry it took so long,

277
00:09:48,782 --> 00:09:51,483
but the faculty kind of
scatters for the summer.

278
00:09:51,551 --> 00:09:55,220
I drove my van to Maine
and planted beans.

279
00:09:55,288 --> 00:09:57,055
Let me guess --
And killed a giant.

280
00:09:58,258 --> 00:10:00,492
- Chicken!
- What the -- Joe!

281
00:10:00,560 --> 00:10:01,759
Joe, come back here.

282
00:10:01,828 --> 00:10:03,394
Oh, it's okay.
The chickens won't hurt him.

283
00:10:03,463 --> 00:10:04,863
They're used to the kids.

284
00:10:04,931 --> 00:10:06,197
Chickens are part of this?

285
00:10:06,266 --> 00:10:08,500
We like to utilize
‭the setting here in the hills,

286
00:10:08,568 --> 00:10:11,369
make nature
‭a part of the experience.

287
00:10:11,438 --> 00:10:15,006
We sometimes see mice or
raccoons or little squirrels.

288
00:10:15,075 --> 00:10:16,841
You know they got traps
for those kind of things.

289
00:10:16,910 --> 00:10:19,410
Ay, I love it. Joe gets to
run around in the fresh air.

290
00:10:19,479 --> 00:10:21,613
Erica, I need you!

291
00:10:21,681 --> 00:10:23,681
I'm sorry. Excuse me.

292
00:10:25,552 --> 00:10:26,684
We're out of here.

293
00:10:26,753 --> 00:10:28,520
She's a loon,
‭letting kids call her "Erica"

294
00:10:28,588 --> 00:10:29,628
like they're poker buddies.

295
00:10:29,689 --> 00:10:31,589
We're too late
for anywhere else.

296
00:10:31,658 --> 00:10:33,525
If Bruce Willis
can jungle-gym his way

297
00:10:33,593 --> 00:10:36,194
into that fancy school,
then I can...

298
00:10:36,263 --> 00:10:37,795
I don't know --
I can cubbie my way in.

299
00:10:37,864 --> 00:10:39,784
They hate their cubbies?
I'll make them new ones.

300
00:10:39,833 --> 00:10:41,399
Cubbies are nothing
but little closets.

301
00:10:41,468 --> 00:10:43,368
Ay, but look at Joe.
He loves it.

302
00:10:43,436 --> 00:10:45,537
He's chasing after the chickens.

303
00:10:46,740 --> 00:10:49,174
He even caught one.
Huh.

304
00:10:49,242 --> 00:10:50,775
Oh, no! No!

305
00:10:50,844 --> 00:10:52,744
No, Joe! Let go!

306
00:10:54,447 --> 00:10:57,782
We will be very happy
to pay for that chicken.

307
00:10:57,851 --> 00:10:59,417
Mitchell, Mitchell!

308
00:10:59,486 --> 00:11:01,686
Look who I bumped
into accidentally by chance.

309
00:11:01,755 --> 00:11:02,954
Hey, stranger.

310
00:11:03,023 --> 00:11:04,222
Charlie!

311
00:11:04,291 --> 00:11:05,823
Ah, I didn't know you painted.

312
00:11:05,892 --> 00:11:07,058
I didn't, either.

313
00:11:07,127 --> 00:11:08,960
It sort of started
as a therapeutic thing,

314
00:11:09,029 --> 00:11:10,862
but then I just
really fell for it.

315
00:11:10,931 --> 00:11:12,463
I always wanted to paint.

316
00:11:12,532 --> 00:11:13,631
Damn it!

317
00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:14,899
Why am I not painting?

318
00:11:14,968 --> 00:11:17,035
Well, you're so busy
running your company.

319
00:11:17,103 --> 00:11:19,304
Maybe if you hired more people,
you'd have more time.

320
00:11:19,372 --> 00:11:21,573
I sleep with so many actresses
and models

321
00:11:21,641 --> 00:11:24,142
who are into guys with jets
and boats and ski houses,

322
00:11:24,211 --> 00:11:26,411
but I always wondered,
wouldn't it be more satisfying

323
00:11:26,479 --> 00:11:29,480
to sleep with actresses
and models who are into artists?

324
00:11:29,549 --> 00:11:31,916
Anyway, you were saying how
overwhelmed you were at work.

325
00:11:31,985 --> 00:11:33,218
I'm overwhelmed by this work.

326
00:11:33,286 --> 00:11:35,453
How do you decide what to paint?

327
00:11:35,522 --> 00:11:37,282
You know, I just see
these images in my head,

328
00:11:37,324 --> 00:11:39,691
uh, things I want to see,
places I want to go,

329
00:11:39,759 --> 00:11:42,126
uh, how much paint I have left.

330
00:11:42,195 --> 00:11:43,895
Um, sometimes I just tap
into my emotions,

331
00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:45,997
and I see where that takes me.

332
00:11:46,066 --> 00:11:49,234
And -- you cannot imagine
the sense of contentment.

333
00:11:49,302 --> 00:11:51,035
Imagine how much more
satisfying it would be

334
00:11:51,104 --> 00:11:52,303
after a good day's work.

335
00:11:52,372 --> 00:11:53,652
You know, I came here
to talk you

336
00:11:53,707 --> 00:11:55,139
into coming back to the company,

337
00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:57,875
but you're the most at-peace
son of a bitch I've ever met,

338
00:11:57,944 --> 00:12:00,311
and I hired the Dalai Lama
for a pool party.

339
00:12:00,380 --> 00:12:01,679
Hmm.

340
00:12:02,515 --> 00:12:04,249
- Thank you, Commander.
- Mm-hmm.

341
00:12:04,317 --> 00:12:06,351
I will drop these at the office
on the way out of town.

342
00:12:06,419 --> 00:12:08,086
So, unless there's
something else?

343
00:12:08,154 --> 00:12:10,274
You're something else.
Claire, get this man a cupcake.

344
00:12:10,290 --> 00:12:12,023
- Mm?
‭- No, thank you, Mrs. Dunphy.

345
00:12:12,092 --> 00:12:14,325
I've got to fit into
a wedding tux pretty soon.

346
00:12:14,394 --> 00:12:16,427
All right, get out of here.
Happy motoring.

347
00:12:16,496 --> 00:12:19,030
- Bye, Andy.
- See you.

348
00:12:19,099 --> 00:12:20,832
Where's he off to?

349
00:12:20,900 --> 00:12:22,834
Utah for a month
to plan his wedding.

350
00:12:22,902 --> 00:12:25,903
I'm kicking myself.
Andy is great.

351
00:12:25,972 --> 00:12:27,672
And if I hadn't opened
my big, fat mouth,

352
00:12:27,741 --> 00:12:31,242
Haley might be with him
right now instead of with Dylan.

353
00:12:31,311 --> 00:12:33,044
Hmm.

354
00:12:33,113 --> 00:12:34,712
- What?
‭- Nothing.

355
00:12:34,781 --> 00:12:35,880
Claire?

356
00:12:35,949 --> 00:12:37,749
Oh, I was just wondering
what would happen

357
00:12:37,817 --> 00:12:41,419
if Andy were to find out
that Haley almost --

358
00:12:41,488 --> 00:12:43,187
No. We are not
meddling like that.

359
00:12:43,256 --> 00:12:45,823
No, we're not.
Of course we're not.

360
00:12:45,892 --> 00:12:48,259
But you meddled
when you called Haley

361
00:12:48,328 --> 00:12:49,861
and told her
that Andy liked her.

362
00:12:49,929 --> 00:12:51,496
That's a far cry
from telling Andy

363
00:12:51,564 --> 00:12:52,630
Haley was in love with him

364
00:12:52,699 --> 00:12:54,899
and raced to the beach
to stop his proposal.

365
00:12:57,671 --> 00:12:59,037
Luke?

366
00:12:59,105 --> 00:13:00,105
Nope.

367
00:13:00,140 --> 00:13:01,140
Ohh.

368
00:13:01,141 --> 00:13:02,740
I accidentally took your pen.

369
00:13:02,809 --> 00:13:04,909
I didn't want to go
plan my wedding

370
00:13:04,978 --> 00:13:06,411
with something so big
weighing on my mind.

371
00:13:06,479 --> 00:13:07,745
Andy, I am really sorry.

372
00:13:07,814 --> 00:13:09,280
I didn't mean for you
to hear that.

373
00:13:09,349 --> 00:13:12,050
Do not worry.
No big dip!

374
00:13:12,118 --> 00:13:13,118
Really?

375
00:13:13,119 --> 00:13:14,152
Sure!

376
00:13:14,220 --> 00:13:16,254
It's actually kind of funny,
you know?

377
00:13:16,323 --> 00:13:17,922
'Cause how crazy is life?

378
00:13:17,991 --> 00:13:19,223
I was all,
"should I propose to Beth?

379
00:13:19,292 --> 00:13:20,291
I have feelings
for someone else."

380
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:21,760
Meantime,
I was talking about Haley.

381
00:13:21,828 --> 00:13:24,529
Haley apparently had feelings
for me, and I had no clue!

382
00:13:24,597 --> 00:13:27,699
How could you not laugh
at something like that, right?

383
00:13:29,436 --> 00:13:31,536
Oh-oh-oh! Ohh.

384
00:13:31,604 --> 00:13:33,705
Mmm! So good.

385
00:13:33,773 --> 00:13:35,540
All right.
Mmm. Happy Fourth.

386
00:13:35,608 --> 00:13:38,509
I am so fine.

387
00:13:42,179 --> 00:13:43,179
_
Hello, hello.

388
00:13:43,442 --> 00:13:44,408
Where do I put this?

389
00:13:44,429 --> 00:13:46,495
Hi. Anywhere on the counter
is great, thanks. Hi, dad.

390
00:13:46,792 --> 00:13:50,260
Hey.
What's, uh, "e-olve" mean?

391
00:13:50,329 --> 00:13:51,795
Oh, no.
It says "evolve."

392
00:13:51,846 --> 00:13:54,780
It's one of Dylan's designs.
The neck is the "v."

393
00:13:54,849 --> 00:13:56,815
- There's two v's.
- There can't be two necks.

394
00:13:56,884 --> 00:13:59,418
- Then why even do it?
‭- Don't make me defend this, dad.

395
00:13:59,487 --> 00:14:00,807
I am just
trying to be supportive.

396
00:14:00,855 --> 00:14:02,254
Ignore him.
He's just grumpy

397
00:14:02,323 --> 00:14:04,390
because Joe starts school
tomorrow.

398
00:14:04,458 --> 00:14:05,691
Well, that's hard
when they leave the nest

399
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:06,760
for the first time.

400
00:14:06,827 --> 00:14:08,128
I don't care about that.

401
00:14:08,996 --> 00:14:11,330
All I wanted was to bribe
my way into that fancy school

402
00:14:11,399 --> 00:14:13,832
by making cubbies
stuff didn't fall out of.

403
00:14:18,472 --> 00:14:20,641
We can't say more.
Litigation is pending.

404
00:14:22,410 --> 00:14:25,411
All right, who's ready
for my famous chicken salad?

405
00:14:25,479 --> 00:14:26,745
Oh, thank you!

406
00:14:26,814 --> 00:14:29,181
- We need the foil back.
- Right.

407
00:14:29,250 --> 00:14:31,116
Whoa. What happened
to your ear, Van Gogh?

408
00:14:31,185 --> 00:14:32,918
Oh, I was painting
sunflowers outside,

409
00:14:32,987 --> 00:14:34,219
and I got stung by a bee.

410
00:14:34,288 --> 00:14:36,121
You know, I take it
as a compliment.

411
00:14:36,190 --> 00:14:37,556
From the bee community?

412
00:14:37,625 --> 00:14:39,058
Oh, my goodness, Claire.
That's one of mine.

413
00:14:39,126 --> 00:14:40,993
Yes, it is.
Oh, that looks so good there.

414
00:14:41,062 --> 00:14:43,596
- Right? - ‭I just love all the colors.
It makes me feel so happy.

415
00:14:43,664 --> 00:14:44,563
Yeah.

416
00:14:44,632 --> 00:14:46,599
I call it
"Rape Of The Immigrant."

417
00:14:46,667 --> 00:14:47,933
I think we left
‭the brownies in the car.

418
00:14:48,002 --> 00:14:50,202
- Oh, I'll get those.
- Well, way to go, pal.

419
00:14:51,606 --> 00:14:54,073
Okay, what is wrong
with you people?

420
00:14:54,141 --> 00:14:56,342
I am dying here,
‭trying to hold down two jobs

421
00:14:56,410 --> 00:14:57,810
while you enable
a once-proud man

422
00:14:57,878 --> 00:15:00,646
who is clearly having
a talent-free breakdown.

423
00:15:00,715 --> 00:15:02,615
You know why
‭he reminds you of Van Gogh?

424
00:15:02,683 --> 00:15:03,882
It's because
he's earning nothing,

425
00:15:03,951 --> 00:15:05,017
and he's losing his mind!

426
00:15:05,086 --> 00:15:08,821
Hey, everybody!
Guess who's back?!

427
00:15:08,889 --> 00:15:09,788
Who? Who is back?

428
00:15:09,857 --> 00:15:10,857
Andy.

429
00:15:10,925 --> 00:15:13,158
Andy! Sorry,
it took me a second.

430
00:15:13,227 --> 00:15:16,228
No, I know. I -- I'm parting
my hair a little differently.

431
00:15:16,297 --> 00:15:17,997
- Yeah.
- That's one thing that's new about me.

432
00:15:18,065 --> 00:15:20,032
- Uh-huh.
‭- So, Beth likes it this way.

433
00:15:20,101 --> 00:15:21,433
- I-I love it, looks great.
- It looks great.

434
00:15:21,502 --> 00:15:23,002
Thank you.

435
00:15:23,670 --> 00:15:24,970
Hi, uncle Mitchell.

436
00:15:25,039 --> 00:15:27,840
Hey! Oh, uh --
Honey, what's wrong?

437
00:15:27,908 --> 00:15:30,275
Nothing. I-I-I just
said goodbye to Sanjay.

438
00:15:30,344 --> 00:15:31,477
We broke up.

439
00:15:31,545 --> 00:15:32,545
No.

440
00:15:32,613 --> 00:15:33,813
No, it's -- it's --
It's great.

441
00:15:33,881 --> 00:15:35,761
We're -- we're both
going to school unencumbered

442
00:15:35,783 --> 00:15:37,383
and ready to focus.

443
00:15:37,451 --> 00:15:38,817
It's the smart thing to do.

444
00:15:38,886 --> 00:15:40,986
We both feel
really good about it.

445
00:15:41,055 --> 00:15:42,388
You don't look like
you feel good.

446
00:15:42,456 --> 00:15:44,590
Well, yeah, he was --
He was sadder than I imagined,

447
00:15:44,659 --> 00:15:46,692
so I'm being strong
for the both of us,

448
00:15:46,761 --> 00:15:48,460
which he said he admires.

449
00:15:48,529 --> 00:15:49,762
I think.

450
00:15:49,830 --> 00:15:51,230
It was hard to hear him

451
00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:53,065
with all the John Legend
and the sobbing.

452
00:15:54,568 --> 00:15:55,968
You know what?

453
00:15:56,037 --> 00:15:57,403
I recently went through
a very hard time,

454
00:15:57,471 --> 00:15:59,338
and I found something
that really helped me

455
00:15:59,407 --> 00:16:00,407
navigate my feelings.

456
00:16:00,474 --> 00:16:02,375
- I don't want to paint.
- Painting.

457
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:07,413
Oh, my god, right?

458
00:16:07,481 --> 00:16:08,847
I am freaking out.

459
00:16:08,916 --> 00:16:10,816
You don't think that's because
of what he heard us say, do you?

460
00:16:10,885 --> 00:16:12,951
No, lots of people gain weight
during their engagement.

461
00:16:13,020 --> 00:16:14,086
- You did.
‭- I was pregnant.

462
00:16:14,155 --> 00:16:15,320
I'm trying, Claire.

463
00:16:15,389 --> 00:16:16,622
I don't want to believe
we're responsible.

464
00:16:16,691 --> 00:16:17,923
Of course we're responsible.

465
00:16:17,992 --> 00:16:20,192
Clearly, Andy has been
stuffing his face ever since

466
00:16:20,261 --> 00:16:22,594
he found out that Haley
almost stopped his proposal.

467
00:16:22,663 --> 00:16:23,762
What?

468
00:16:23,831 --> 00:16:25,297
We have got to start
talking in the garage.

469
00:16:25,366 --> 00:16:27,566
Uh, Dylan, could you
make me a plate?

470
00:16:27,635 --> 00:16:29,234
If I can make a bong
out of a carrot,

471
00:16:29,303 --> 00:16:30,903
I think I can make you a plate.

472
00:16:30,971 --> 00:16:33,472
You told Andy I tried
to stop his proposal?

473
00:16:33,541 --> 00:16:34,707
Not on purpose.

474
00:16:34,775 --> 00:16:36,308
Before he left for Utah,
your father and I

475
00:16:36,377 --> 00:16:39,078
were privately discussing
how bad it would be

476
00:16:39,146 --> 00:16:41,413
if he found out,
and Andy overheard us.

477
00:16:41,482 --> 00:16:42,381
What did he say?

478
00:16:42,450 --> 00:16:43,916
- He said he was fine.
- Mm.

479
00:16:43,984 --> 00:16:47,386
But... now we're not so sure.

480
00:16:49,557 --> 00:16:50,956
Oh, my god.

481
00:16:51,025 --> 00:16:53,058
- Oh, my god, that's Andy?
- Mm-hmm.

482
00:16:53,127 --> 00:16:54,727
You think he got fat
'cause of me?

483
00:16:54,795 --> 00:16:56,428
Possibly. Yes.

484
00:16:56,497 --> 00:16:57,863
Should I talk to him about it?

485
00:16:57,932 --> 00:16:59,465
Honey, that has to be
your decision.

486
00:16:59,533 --> 00:17:01,300
We are through meddling
in your love life.

487
00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,602
- Yeah. - Though I will say
he's still very much engaged.

488
00:17:03,671 --> 00:17:04,903
Whereas, I would
‭want to know if he got fat

489
00:17:04,972 --> 00:17:06,412
because he was
still in love with me.

490
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:07,506
And now we're out.

491
00:17:09,276 --> 00:17:10,476
See, don't you feel better?

492
00:17:10,544 --> 00:17:11,544
No.

493
00:17:11,545 --> 00:17:13,245
Don't stress out about light

494
00:17:13,314 --> 00:17:14,880
and perspective and --
And color.

495
00:17:14,949 --> 00:17:18,083
You know, just let your painting
be what it wants to be.

496
00:17:18,152 --> 00:17:20,519
- How's this?
- Here, let's see.

497
00:17:20,588 --> 00:17:22,554
What the hell?
Why are you so good?

498
00:17:22,623 --> 00:17:24,990
I don't know.
I'm just good at most things.

499
00:17:25,059 --> 00:17:26,925
So am I, usually.

500
00:17:26,994 --> 00:17:29,695
Wait a second.
So is Sanjay.

501
00:17:29,764 --> 00:17:32,531
I-I-I-I have to get to him
before he leaves.

502
00:17:34,001 --> 00:17:35,734
Wow!

503
00:17:35,803 --> 00:17:38,137
You're really getting better.
Maybe you should go inside.

504
00:17:39,406 --> 00:17:42,207
Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe,
get down from there!

505
00:17:42,276 --> 00:17:44,376
- You're gonna get hurt.
- What happened?

506
00:17:44,445 --> 00:17:46,044
This is why he shouldn't
go to your commune.

507
00:17:46,113 --> 00:17:48,147
He'll fall,
‭those hippies won't notice,

508
00:17:48,215 --> 00:17:49,948
and he'll be eaten alive
by chickens.

509
00:17:50,017 --> 00:17:51,250
I think we have established

510
00:17:51,318 --> 00:17:53,278
that he can take care of himself
around a chicken.

511
00:17:53,287 --> 00:17:56,989
You keep forgetting
‭that Joe is tough. He's part me.

512
00:17:57,057 --> 00:17:59,424
That's the son that you should
be worrying about.

513
00:18:02,663 --> 00:18:04,897
I really thought
I was done with that one.

514
00:18:04,965 --> 00:18:06,431
Hmm.

515
00:18:08,369 --> 00:18:09,601
How's it going?

516
00:18:09,670 --> 00:18:12,371
I got a splinter...
And a few other issues.

517
00:18:12,439 --> 00:18:14,406
You know what's happening here,
don't you?

518
00:18:14,475 --> 00:18:16,074
You're having
a mid-life crisis.

519
00:18:16,143 --> 00:18:17,276
Oh, my god.

520
00:18:17,344 --> 00:18:19,244
Some guys,
‭it's fast cars and women.

521
00:18:19,313 --> 00:18:21,046
Me, it was golf.

522
00:18:21,115 --> 00:18:23,549
You, ‭it's just a little gayer.

523
00:18:23,617 --> 00:18:25,584
I know like 10 lesbians
who could out-golf you.

524
00:18:25,653 --> 00:18:28,353
The point is when you're wound
as tight as we are,

525
00:18:28,422 --> 00:18:30,289
you're bound to snap.

526
00:18:30,357 --> 00:18:33,392
Yeah. Yeah, I-I've just been
working so hard for so long.

527
00:18:33,460 --> 00:18:34,693
And now that I've stopped,

528
00:18:34,762 --> 00:18:36,929
I'm -- I'm having
‭a hard time starting again.

529
00:18:36,997 --> 00:18:38,230
Oh, I get it.

530
00:18:38,299 --> 00:18:40,899
I took six weeks off one summer
just to play golf.

531
00:18:40,968 --> 00:18:42,968
And one day, during
the big club tournament,

532
00:18:43,037 --> 00:18:44,770
I hooked a seven-iron
out of bounds.

533
00:18:44,839 --> 00:18:47,873
I got so pissed that
I wrapped the club around a tree

534
00:18:47,942 --> 00:18:50,409
and drove the golf cart off
the little bridge into the lake.

535
00:18:51,378 --> 00:18:53,745
I'll never forget
‭what the club pro said to me.

536
00:18:53,814 --> 00:18:56,381
"Mr. Pritchett,
‭you're not a very good golfer.

537
00:18:56,450 --> 00:18:58,016
Go back
to your day job."

538
00:18:58,085 --> 00:18:59,085
Look...

539
00:18:59,119 --> 00:19:00,786
I know I'm not
a good painter, dad.

540
00:19:00,855 --> 00:19:03,755
I -- I was just hoping
to feel a little bit better

541
00:19:03,824 --> 00:19:05,591
before going back to work.

542
00:19:05,659 --> 00:19:08,193
You're not gonna feel better
until you go back to work.

543
00:19:08,262 --> 00:19:10,329
Mitchell, you're a great lawyer.

544
00:19:10,397 --> 00:19:11,597
Go do that.

545
00:19:11,665 --> 00:19:13,732
- And get a haircut.
‭- Okay.

546
00:19:13,801 --> 00:19:15,534
Hey.

547
00:19:15,603 --> 00:19:17,603
Hey.

548
00:19:17,671 --> 00:19:19,438
So, listen, um,
I heard that you found out

549
00:19:19,506 --> 00:19:20,973
that I was at the beach
that day.

550
00:19:23,410 --> 00:19:24,977
Yeah.

551
00:19:25,045 --> 00:19:27,279
I didn't know you felt
that way about me.

552
00:19:27,348 --> 00:19:28,714
Would have been nice to know.

553
00:19:28,782 --> 00:19:29,848
Well, it would have
been nice to know

554
00:19:29,917 --> 00:19:31,183
you had feelings for me.

555
00:19:31,252 --> 00:19:32,784
A lot of things
would have been nice.

556
00:19:32,853 --> 00:19:35,621
Do you have feelings for me now?

557
00:19:35,689 --> 00:19:39,024
Haley, I'm engaged.

558
00:19:39,093 --> 00:19:40,726
That's not an answer.

559
00:19:42,494 --> 00:19:44,830
Why are you picking now
to talk about all this?

560
00:19:45,099 --> 00:19:47,499
Because I'm worried
about all this.

561
00:19:47,568 --> 00:19:49,334
What? My weight?

562
00:19:49,403 --> 00:19:51,970
Please.
This will drop off in a second.

563
00:19:52,039 --> 00:19:54,640
Andy, don't you think
that there is a chance

564
00:19:54,708 --> 00:19:55,807
that you have been eating

565
00:19:55,876 --> 00:19:57,442
because you regret
getting engaged to Beth?

566
00:19:57,511 --> 00:20:00,612
Why would I do that?
Beth is amazing.

567
00:20:00,681 --> 00:20:03,448
Beth is a psycho who tried
to light my hair on fire.

568
00:20:03,517 --> 00:20:05,951
Meanwhile,
Dylan is in the backyard

569
00:20:06,020 --> 00:20:08,020
trying to make a plate
out of sticks.

570
00:20:08,088 --> 00:20:10,322
Well, at least he knows
what he wants and goes for it.

571
00:20:10,391 --> 00:20:12,291
Then I guess it's a good thing
that we didn't get together.

572
00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:13,558
Best decision I ever made!

573
00:20:13,627 --> 00:20:14,627
Samesies!

574
00:20:19,233 --> 00:20:20,832
I'm not gonna lie, Phil.

575
00:20:20,901 --> 00:20:22,334
I might need
to get back into that.

576
00:20:22,403 --> 00:20:23,403
Yep.

577
00:20:26,346 --> 00:20:27,979
Sanjay!

578
00:20:28,048 --> 00:20:29,480
Oh, god.
‭I can't say goodbye again.

579
00:20:29,549 --> 00:20:30,715
We don't have to.

580
00:20:30,784 --> 00:20:32,684
We're basing this decision
on a statistic.

581
00:20:32,752 --> 00:20:34,686
86% of long-distance
relationships

582
00:20:34,754 --> 00:20:36,354
- end in failure, correct?
- Of course "correct."

583
00:20:36,423 --> 00:20:37,488
You'd never
misquote a statistic.

584
00:20:37,557 --> 00:20:38,557
And neither would you.

585
00:20:38,558 --> 00:20:39,657
When have we ever been

586
00:20:39,726 --> 00:20:41,993
in the bottom 86th percentile
of anything?

587
00:20:42,062 --> 00:20:45,129
Never. I'd kill myself.
We're in the top 1%.

588
00:20:45,198 --> 00:20:48,199
Exactly. I learned how to paint
in an afternoon.

589
00:20:48,268 --> 00:20:50,768
Last night, I developed an app
to feed my fish from college.

590
00:20:50,837 --> 00:20:54,639
If anyone can make this work,
it's you and me.

591
00:20:54,708 --> 00:20:55,807
God, I love numbers.

592
00:20:55,875 --> 00:20:58,176
I love numbers, too.

593
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,200
Sync and corrections by gloriabg
www.addic7ed.com