1
00:00:00,961 --> 00:00:01,794
Thank you.
2
00:00:01,829 --> 00:00:04,311
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Samples!
3
00:00:04,336 --> 00:00:05,535
Mmm!
4
00:00:05,569 --> 00:00:07,220
Mmm.
5
00:00:07,271 --> 00:00:08,788
Excuse me, do I know you?
6
00:00:08,823 --> 00:00:10,090
I don't think so.
7
00:00:10,124 --> 00:00:12,809
You look so familiar. Why
am I picturing a bench ad?
8
00:00:12,811 --> 00:00:14,861
Minor celebrity. Guilty as charged.
9
00:00:14,912 --> 00:00:17,163
Oh! You're the "Accidentes" guy.
10
00:00:17,214 --> 00:00:19,115
Mm. No. No, no, no.
11
00:00:19,150 --> 00:00:21,484
Um, I'm, uh...
12
00:00:21,519 --> 00:00:23,503
I'm Mr. Real Estate... Phil Dunphy.
13
00:00:23,537 --> 00:00:24,671
Oh, right.
14
00:00:24,705 --> 00:00:27,307
I am actually looking
for a house right now.
15
00:00:27,358 --> 00:00:29,109
Wow. Well, if I could
be of any service...
16
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:31,244
I don't... I don't have any cards.
I'm in my gym clothes.
17
00:00:31,295 --> 00:00:33,930
Oh, I see you earned that hot chocolate.
18
00:00:33,981 --> 00:00:36,966
Yeah, I rocked a pretty intense
Shake Weights/power walk combo.
19
00:00:37,001 --> 00:00:38,418
Morning, neighbors.
20
00:00:38,469 --> 00:00:42,105
Saw your daughter yesterday.
Boy, she is growing up fast.
21
00:00:44,041 --> 00:00:46,009
My name is Angie.
22
00:00:46,043 --> 00:00:47,560
Here is my number.
23
00:00:47,595 --> 00:00:49,862
If you find any good three-bedrooms
in the neighborhood,
24
00:00:49,947 --> 00:00:51,381
I'd love to see them.
25
00:00:51,415 --> 00:00:53,216
Well, I'll call you. I'd
love to show them to you.
26
00:00:53,250 --> 00:00:54,767
I'm not just a pretty
face people sit on.
27
00:00:54,818 --> 00:00:56,319
Forget... I said that.
28
00:00:58,906 --> 00:01:00,223
Here you go.
29
00:01:00,257 --> 00:01:01,924
Oh, thanks, honey.
30
00:01:01,975 --> 00:01:04,027
Who's Angie?
31
00:01:04,061 --> 00:01:06,913
Oh. Just a woman I m-met inside.
32
00:01:06,964 --> 00:01:08,464
Really? She gave you her number?
33
00:01:08,515 --> 00:01:10,350
And dotted her "I" with a little heart?
34
00:01:10,384 --> 00:01:12,118
Oh, yeah. She's looking for a house.
35
00:01:12,152 --> 00:01:12,919
Sweet old lady.
36
00:01:12,953 --> 00:01:14,037
Don't know why I said that.
37
00:01:14,088 --> 00:01:15,004
Little overweight.
38
00:01:15,039 --> 00:01:16,472
No idea where that came from.
39
00:01:16,474 --> 00:01:17,473
Thick Irish accent.
40
00:01:17,475 --> 00:01:18,441
I panicked!
41
00:01:18,492 --> 00:01:19,659
I should have told the truth,
42
00:01:19,710 --> 00:01:22,562
but Claire knows I have... a type.
43
00:01:22,596 --> 00:01:25,481
It was just a little white lie.
44
00:01:25,499 --> 00:01:26,883
Ironically.
45
00:01:35,707 --> 00:01:38,386
- sync and corrections by Caio -
- www.addic7ed.com -
46
00:01:41,098 --> 00:01:42,098
Hey, America!
47
00:01:42,149 --> 00:01:43,900
I didn't see you there.
48
00:01:43,934 --> 00:01:47,370
Welcome to another live
webcast of "Jay Talking."
49
00:01:47,404 --> 00:01:49,538
You know what really gets my goat?
50
00:01:49,573 --> 00:01:50,640
Goat cheese.
51
00:01:50,674 --> 00:01:51,707
It's on everything.
52
00:01:51,742 --> 00:01:52,708
I hate it.
53
00:01:52,743 --> 00:01:54,694
The only thing worse than goat cheese
54
00:01:54,745 --> 00:01:56,445
is eating it at a communal table
55
00:01:56,496 --> 00:01:59,015
with some jerk wearing a hat inside.
56
00:01:59,049 --> 00:02:00,416
Have some respect.
57
00:02:00,450 --> 00:02:02,084
And pull up your pants!
58
00:02:02,119 --> 00:02:04,687
Only crack I want to see
is in the Liberty Bell.
59
00:02:04,721 --> 00:02:07,039
Greatest country on the damn planet.
60
00:02:07,090 --> 00:02:08,290
If, six months ago,
61
00:02:08,341 --> 00:02:09,959
you'd have told me I'd
have a big Internet show,
62
00:02:09,961 --> 00:02:11,710
I would have said, "Yeah, that adds up."
63
00:02:11,762 --> 00:02:14,597
I used to entertain my staff
with jokes and observations.
64
00:02:14,631 --> 00:02:15,765
When I retired,
65
00:02:15,799 --> 00:02:17,516
I started sharing those
gems around the house.
66
00:02:17,551 --> 00:02:20,853
Manny went so nuts for it,
he set up the whole webcast.
67
00:02:20,887 --> 00:02:23,222
Sorry, Internet. He's your problem now.
68
00:02:23,273 --> 00:02:25,691
Bottom line, you can keep your hashtags,
69
00:02:25,725 --> 00:02:27,893
'cause I like hashbrowns.
70
00:02:27,944 --> 00:02:29,211
But, hey...
71
00:02:29,246 --> 00:02:31,213
that's just "Jay Talking."
72
00:02:35,235 --> 00:02:36,619
And we're out.
73
00:02:36,653 --> 00:02:38,988
Wow. 90 minutes just flew by.
74
00:02:38,990 --> 00:02:40,072
Hey, guys!
75
00:02:40,123 --> 00:02:42,491
The comments are already rolling in!
76
00:02:42,493 --> 00:02:43,993
"Keep it up, Jay."
77
00:02:43,995 --> 00:02:45,995
"You're saying what we're all thinking."
78
00:02:46,046 --> 00:02:47,830
"I miss chop suey, too."
79
00:02:47,832 --> 00:02:50,666
I love it, because now everybody
gets to see what I live with.
80
00:02:50,717 --> 00:02:52,501
- What the hell? This guy again?
- Who?
81
00:02:52,552 --> 00:02:54,403
Some meatball named "LadyKiller52"
82
00:02:54,437 --> 00:02:55,671
been dogging me for days.
83
00:02:55,673 --> 00:02:56,839
Look what he wrote.
84
00:02:56,890 --> 00:02:59,341
"Hey, Grandpa, no one
cares what you think."
85
00:02:59,343 --> 00:03:01,844
Are you sure that that's not from Haley?
86
00:03:01,846 --> 00:03:03,345
Here's another one. The same jerk!
87
00:03:03,396 --> 00:03:05,481
"It's weird you don't like goat cheese
88
00:03:05,515 --> 00:03:07,182
when you've got a goat face."
89
00:03:07,184 --> 00:03:08,650
- Well, that makes no sense.
- Mnh-mnh.
90
00:03:08,685 --> 00:03:10,903
What kind of goat eats its own cheese?
91
00:03:10,937 --> 00:03:14,022
Here I am, trying to make
America laugh and think,
92
00:03:14,073 --> 00:03:16,441
and this hockey puck's coming
at me with tired insults.
93
00:03:16,493 --> 00:03:17,993
Okay, I-it's called a troll, Jay.
94
00:03:18,027 --> 00:03:19,695
But you can't let him or anything else
95
00:03:19,746 --> 00:03:21,697
keep you from directing
all of your opinions
96
00:03:21,699 --> 00:03:22,531
into that computer.
97
00:03:22,582 --> 00:03:23,532
You're right, Manny.
98
00:03:23,534 --> 00:03:25,751
It's tough being in the public eye.
99
00:03:25,785 --> 00:03:27,869
Now I know why Sinatra was
always punching guys.
100
00:03:29,505 --> 00:03:30,872
Hola, Claire.
101
00:03:30,923 --> 00:03:32,424
Hey. What's going on?
102
00:03:32,458 --> 00:03:34,376
You do a lot of yoga, right?
103
00:03:34,378 --> 00:03:35,177
Ah, I used to.
104
00:03:35,211 --> 00:03:36,545
But all those judgy vegans
105
00:03:36,547 --> 00:03:38,547
with their ponytails
and their Lululemon,
106
00:03:38,549 --> 00:03:40,882
I'm like, "nama-stay
home," you know what I mean?
107
00:03:41,851 --> 00:03:42,968
Um...
108
00:03:43,019 --> 00:03:44,970
I just started taking it,
109
00:03:45,021 --> 00:03:47,773
but I think that the
instructor is hitting on me.
110
00:03:47,807 --> 00:03:48,890
- He is.
- How do you know?
111
00:03:48,892 --> 00:03:50,609
Because you're you in yoga pants.
112
00:03:50,643 --> 00:03:51,526
Ugh.
113
00:03:51,561 --> 00:03:52,727
Just go to another class.
114
00:03:52,779 --> 00:03:54,446
But this one is perfect.
115
00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,865
It's at the same time as Joe's Gymboree,
116
00:03:56,899 --> 00:03:58,617
right next door.
117
00:03:58,651 --> 00:04:00,285
Ay, why don't you come with me today
118
00:04:00,319 --> 00:04:01,953
and tell me if I'm just being crazy?
119
00:04:01,988 --> 00:04:03,488
Sure. Text me the info.
120
00:04:03,539 --> 00:04:04,956
Hey, remind her!
121
00:04:04,991 --> 00:04:06,741
Oh! And don't forget...
122
00:04:06,792 --> 00:04:10,078
today, all-new episode of "Jay Talking."
123
00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:11,913
He takes on restaurants
124
00:04:11,915 --> 00:04:14,249
that write their menus on blackboards.
125
00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:16,001
I want to feel a menu in my hands!
126
00:04:18,387 --> 00:04:19,504
Hey, girl.
127
00:04:19,555 --> 00:04:20,755
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
128
00:04:20,757 --> 00:04:22,841
Just wanted to say hi, talk about stuff.
129
00:04:22,892 --> 00:04:24,559
- What stuff?
- I don't know.
130
00:04:24,593 --> 00:04:25,593
I just miss you.
131
00:04:25,644 --> 00:04:27,178
We could talk about anything.
132
00:04:27,229 --> 00:04:29,314
How about... Watergate?
133
00:04:29,348 --> 00:04:31,733
Like, what would you say were
the three most significant ways
134
00:04:31,767 --> 00:04:33,268
it changed American politics?
135
00:04:33,319 --> 00:04:34,769
Cite your sources.
136
00:04:34,820 --> 00:04:35,937
I'm not writing your essay.
137
00:04:35,939 --> 00:04:37,405
Okay. See you at Easter.
138
00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:38,940
Hey. I'm back.
139
00:04:38,991 --> 00:04:41,443
How'd your showing with
Angie-with-a-heart go?
140
00:04:41,445 --> 00:04:43,444
Oh, fine. Uneventful.
141
00:04:43,496 --> 00:04:44,863
Nondescript.
142
00:04:44,914 --> 00:04:46,948
This shower's really small.
143
00:04:46,999 --> 00:04:49,167
Could you imagine me in here?
144
00:04:51,370 --> 00:04:52,871
Weird thing... I was
with her for two hours,
145
00:04:52,922 --> 00:04:54,172
I couldn't pick her out of a crowd.
146
00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:55,373
Really? That is weird.
147
00:04:55,424 --> 00:04:56,257
Nothing weird about it.
148
00:04:56,292 --> 00:04:57,375
You just said it was weird.
149
00:04:57,426 --> 00:04:58,593
That's weird. Give me a kiss!
150
00:04:58,627 --> 00:04:59,460
Mwah!
151
00:04:59,462 --> 00:05:00,712
What are you up to, buddy?
152
00:05:00,763 --> 00:05:02,630
Writing a paper on President Nixon.
153
00:05:02,681 --> 00:05:04,132
What an idiot.
154
00:05:04,183 --> 00:05:05,550
He had it all and just threw it away
155
00:05:05,601 --> 00:05:06,684
because of some stupid lie.
156
00:05:06,719 --> 00:05:08,136
Well, maybe it came out of his mouth
157
00:05:08,138 --> 00:05:09,470
before he knew what he was saying.
158
00:05:09,472 --> 00:05:11,939
Okay, but then he just
kept lying over and over
159
00:05:11,974 --> 00:05:13,641
and making it worse and worse.
160
00:05:13,692 --> 00:05:14,859
Phil, how old is Angie?
161
00:05:14,893 --> 00:05:17,145
Oh, uh, gosh... 70. Why?
162
00:05:17,196 --> 00:05:18,813
I was thinking about
that house on Forsyth.
163
00:05:18,815 --> 00:05:20,398
It's nice but has a lot of stairs.
164
00:05:20,449 --> 00:05:22,366
No. She's too... fat for that.
165
00:05:22,401 --> 00:05:23,618
Hmm.
166
00:05:23,652 --> 00:05:25,486
Therefore, I shall resign the presidency
167
00:05:25,537 --> 00:05:27,038
effective at noon tomorrow.
168
00:05:27,072 --> 00:05:28,489
If only he had told the truth.
169
00:05:28,491 --> 00:05:30,041
He was in too deep!
170
00:05:32,828 --> 00:05:35,163
Ta-da! Check out what I got!
171
00:05:35,165 --> 00:05:36,214
No, thanks.
172
00:05:36,248 --> 00:05:38,666
Thought we could go to the park
tomorrow and you could finally learn.
173
00:05:38,668 --> 00:05:41,002
What pavement tastes like?
I don't think so.
174
00:05:41,004 --> 00:05:44,589
Well, Lily, when you're
ready, it's here for you.
175
00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,307
Mitchell, can I, um, speak
to you in the bedroom
176
00:05:46,341 --> 00:05:47,675
about the, uh, dust ruffle?
177
00:05:47,677 --> 00:05:50,478
Don't worry... the
dust ruffle's leaving.
178
00:05:52,898 --> 00:05:54,098
Okay, why are you doing this?
179
00:05:54,149 --> 00:05:55,433
We need Lily to get on this bike.
180
00:05:55,484 --> 00:05:57,068
Why are you pushing this so hard?
181
00:05:57,102 --> 00:05:58,185
She's clearly afraid.
182
00:05:58,236 --> 00:05:59,904
She's been afraid of a
lot of things lately.
183
00:05:59,938 --> 00:06:01,606
Last week, she wouldn't
even open her closet door
184
00:06:01,657 --> 00:06:04,025
because she thought something
scary was in there.
185
00:06:04,109 --> 00:06:05,910
Could be the denim jumpsuit
your mom made her.
186
00:06:05,944 --> 00:06:07,244
This is a pivotal moment.
187
00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:08,446
We can't raise a child
188
00:06:08,497 --> 00:06:11,615
who won't ride a bike
or get on an airplane
189
00:06:11,666 --> 00:06:12,917
or eat mayonnaise.
190
00:06:12,951 --> 00:06:14,935
It's a texture thing. How
does egg become that?
191
00:06:14,970 --> 00:06:17,188
We are doing this tomorrow.
She is getting on this bike.
192
00:06:17,222 --> 00:06:18,689
What's the rush? She's 8 years old.
193
00:06:18,740 --> 00:06:22,293
Most Vietnamese kids her age are
already riding a bike to work.
194
00:06:23,378 --> 00:06:25,012
So, where's Mahatma Handsy?
195
00:06:25,014 --> 00:06:27,431
I noticed that you have a
lot of these yoga puns.
196
00:06:27,482 --> 00:06:28,816
I don't think we need any more.
197
00:06:29,951 --> 00:06:31,418
Namaste.
198
00:06:31,453 --> 00:06:33,304
Okay. Now I get the one from before.
199
00:06:33,355 --> 00:06:34,555
Uh-huh.
200
00:06:34,606 --> 00:06:35,906
- Hi.
- Hi.
201
00:06:35,941 --> 00:06:37,157
We haven't met.
202
00:06:37,209 --> 00:06:38,359
Oh. Claire.
203
00:06:38,393 --> 00:06:39,460
- Claire.
- Mm-hmm.
204
00:06:39,462 --> 00:06:40,928
Beautiful.
205
00:06:40,962 --> 00:06:42,896
Like the sunrise in Tanjung Rhu.
206
00:06:42,931 --> 00:06:44,598
You have a great yoga body.
You've done this before?
207
00:06:44,649 --> 00:06:46,450
Um, yeah. I mean, it's been
a little while, but yeah.
208
00:06:46,484 --> 00:06:49,336
Great posture, strong core.
209
00:06:51,773 --> 00:06:53,691
We're going to have fun.
210
00:06:53,725 --> 00:06:56,493
Maybe I've just been stressed
lately, but I was wrong.
211
00:06:56,544 --> 00:06:58,212
Yoga felt good.
212
00:06:58,263 --> 00:07:01,098
We are lifting our hips
towards the ceiling.
213
00:07:01,149 --> 00:07:03,016
Very nice, Claire.
214
00:07:04,102 --> 00:07:05,569
Ra was very supportive.
215
00:07:05,620 --> 00:07:08,072
Maybe I just never had
the right teacher.
216
00:07:11,576 --> 00:07:12,993
Am I doing it right?
217
00:07:13,044 --> 00:07:13,961
Shh!
218
00:07:15,830 --> 00:07:17,748
And they validate parking.
219
00:07:20,037 --> 00:07:21,204
Another one?
220
00:07:21,287 --> 00:07:23,403
I've had it with this
LadyKiller son of a bitch.
221
00:07:23,428 --> 00:07:24,978
He's been lobbing insults all night.
222
00:07:25,013 --> 00:07:27,881
"Hey, dumbbell, I can smell your
breath through the Internet."
223
00:07:27,932 --> 00:07:29,060
They can't do that, right?
224
00:07:29,107 --> 00:07:31,158
Jay, take it from a fellow performer...
225
00:07:31,193 --> 00:07:32,827
If you're going to put
yourself out there,
226
00:07:32,829 --> 00:07:34,645
you need to let the criticism
roll off your back.
227
00:07:34,679 --> 00:07:36,831
I must say, I was impressed
you didn't mope for a month
228
00:07:36,865 --> 00:07:39,366
after that brutal review of
you in "Sound of Music."
229
00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:41,469
What are you talking about?
There was no review.
230
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:43,137
There was no school paper that week.
231
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,457
Eeeeeexactly. There was
no paper that week.
232
00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:47,591
Oh, yeah.
233
00:07:47,642 --> 00:07:48,726
What did you do?
234
00:07:48,777 --> 00:07:49,777
I...
235
00:07:49,811 --> 00:07:51,579
I am not going to stand here
236
00:07:51,613 --> 00:07:55,132
and let you accuse me of
stealing all of those papers!
237
00:07:57,285 --> 00:07:59,453
He didn't say that.
238
00:07:59,455 --> 00:08:01,005
"After seeing Manny Delgado
239
00:08:01,056 --> 00:08:03,023
mangle the role of Captain Von Trapp,
240
00:08:03,058 --> 00:08:06,126
all I can say is "Doe-a-dear
Lord, make it stop.
241
00:08:06,177 --> 00:08:08,963
I am 16 going on antidepressants.
242
00:08:08,997 --> 00:08:11,832
I wanted to climb every
mountain and jump off."
243
00:08:11,834 --> 00:08:14,134
What teacher allowed this?
244
00:08:15,387 --> 00:08:16,570
Hey, Grandpa.
245
00:08:16,604 --> 00:08:17,538
Hi, honey!
246
00:08:17,572 --> 00:08:18,622
Oh, I'm so glad you called.
247
00:08:18,657 --> 00:08:20,074
I've just been having the worst week.
248
00:08:20,108 --> 00:08:21,975
It's been so overwhelming and so much...
249
00:08:22,010 --> 00:08:23,610
You know what helps? A cocktail.
250
00:08:23,645 --> 00:08:25,145
Listen, I've got a situation.
251
00:08:25,180 --> 00:08:26,714
Do you know any computer nerds
252
00:08:26,748 --> 00:08:28,849
that can track someone
down on the Internet?
253
00:08:31,152 --> 00:08:33,704
Yeah, I think I can find a few.
254
00:08:33,755 --> 00:08:35,989
Okay! How exciting is this, Lily?
255
00:08:36,024 --> 00:08:38,225
In no time at all, you're
gonna be a bike rider.
256
00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:39,860
- Or a corpse.
- Okay...
257
00:08:39,894 --> 00:08:42,045
I know you're afraid, and
sometimes it's helpful
258
00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:45,682
if you say exactly what
you're afraid of out loud.
259
00:08:45,733 --> 00:08:46,567
So...?
260
00:08:46,569 --> 00:08:49,536
I'm afraid I'll fall because I'm
not ready and you forced me,
261
00:08:49,538 --> 00:08:51,972
so for the rest of my life,
I'll hold it against you.
262
00:08:52,023 --> 00:08:53,190
And then other times, it's just best
263
00:08:53,224 --> 00:08:55,042
to tamp it down and soldier on.
264
00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:57,244
I said this when you pried
her out of the car,
265
00:08:57,246 --> 00:08:59,846
and I'll say this again...
she doesn't want to do this!
266
00:08:59,848 --> 00:09:02,049
She will when she sees
how easy it is for me.
267
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,951
See? Easy as pie!
268
00:09:03,985 --> 00:09:06,336
Okay, look, Lily, if you
don't want to do this...
269
00:09:06,387 --> 00:09:07,721
- I don't want to do this.
- Okay.
270
00:09:09,357 --> 00:09:10,474
Aah! I'm good!
271
00:09:10,525 --> 00:09:12,325
Um... look. All right.
I'm gonna talk to Daddy.
272
00:09:12,327 --> 00:09:15,462
But just promise me you'll
learn someday, okay?
273
00:09:15,464 --> 00:09:16,847
And that you'll get on a plane.
274
00:09:16,881 --> 00:09:19,066
Why wouldn't I get on a plane?
What's wrong with them?
275
00:09:19,117 --> 00:09:20,567
Nothing. They're safer than cars.
276
00:09:20,618 --> 00:09:22,202
- Cars aren't safe?!
- Oh, my God.
277
00:09:22,236 --> 00:09:23,754
Okay! Look... here's Daddy.
278
00:09:23,805 --> 00:09:25,806
Here we are, safe and sound!
279
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:27,107
- What's wrong?
- Nothing.
280
00:09:27,158 --> 00:09:28,909
I just think I left the oven
on at home after breakfast,
281
00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:29,960
so we should get going.
282
00:09:30,011 --> 00:09:30,927
Thank God.
283
00:09:30,962 --> 00:09:32,546
No, you had cereal for breakfast.
284
00:09:32,597 --> 00:09:33,647
What's going on?
285
00:09:33,649 --> 00:09:35,282
I wiped out, and I think I broke my arm.
286
00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,750
I've never been in so much pain.
287
00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:37,918
Keep smiling.
288
00:09:37,920 --> 00:09:38,919
Got to get you to an ER.
289
00:09:38,921 --> 00:09:40,220
No, don't! No, no!
290
00:09:40,254 --> 00:09:42,322
If Lily sees me hurt, she's
never gonna get on a bike.
291
00:09:42,356 --> 00:09:44,040
You crashed because of that
shirtless jogger, didn't you?
292
00:09:44,075 --> 00:09:45,842
Oh, my God. Right?
293
00:09:47,094 --> 00:09:49,779
Oh, Gloria! I was wondering if
you were gonna be here today.
294
00:09:49,814 --> 00:09:51,114
What are you doing here?
295
00:09:51,165 --> 00:09:53,833
I got to say, I thought I was over yoga,
296
00:09:53,868 --> 00:09:56,303
but yesterday was a real eye-opener.
297
00:09:56,305 --> 00:09:57,854
"Eye" or "thigh"?
298
00:09:57,905 --> 00:09:59,072
Hmm. Wow.
299
00:09:59,106 --> 00:10:01,041
I thought it was a very
challenging class,
300
00:10:01,075 --> 00:10:03,710
and I don't really appreciate
anything else you're implying,
301
00:10:03,761 --> 00:10:05,178
'cause you're a little...
302
00:10:05,212 --> 00:10:06,146
I'm what?
303
00:10:06,148 --> 00:10:07,280
Jealous.
304
00:10:07,331 --> 00:10:09,082
Of what... of him rubbing you
305
00:10:09,116 --> 00:10:11,434
like he was expecting
a genie to come out?
306
00:10:11,469 --> 00:10:15,105
Look, you are so used to being
the center of men's attention
307
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:18,691
that yesterday, it probably
bothered you that I... got some.
308
00:10:18,726 --> 00:10:20,560
Attention. That's all. Just attention.
309
00:10:20,611 --> 00:10:23,396
That's insane. I am a married woman.
310
00:10:23,398 --> 00:10:26,049
I am used to getting no attention.
311
00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:28,568
No, Angie, you're like right
around the corner from me.
312
00:10:28,602 --> 00:10:30,103
Yeah, turn left, walk west,
313
00:10:30,105 --> 00:10:32,121
and I'll see you in front
of the hair salon.
314
00:10:32,156 --> 00:10:33,623
All right. See you in a minute.
315
00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:34,841
Phil?
316
00:10:34,843 --> 00:10:35,642
Ohh!
317
00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:36,392
Hey!
318
00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:37,343
No!
319
00:10:39,196 --> 00:10:40,346
What are you guys up to?
320
00:10:40,381 --> 00:10:41,331
I have a yoga class.
321
00:10:41,365 --> 00:10:43,766
And, apparently, Claire does, too.
322
00:10:43,801 --> 00:10:44,934
What are you doing here?
323
00:10:44,969 --> 00:10:46,719
Oh, just on my way to show more houses
324
00:10:46,770 --> 00:10:50,123
to my fat, Irish client, Angie O'Plasty.
325
00:10:50,174 --> 00:10:51,524
Huh. I'm going in.
326
00:10:51,558 --> 00:10:53,893
I will tell Ra that you're here.
327
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:57,080
Ra is our yoga instructor.
328
00:10:57,114 --> 00:10:59,215
Oh, she must be great. You're
here two days in a row.
329
00:10:59,266 --> 00:11:01,300
She is great.
330
00:11:01,302 --> 00:11:02,452
She's a little old.
331
00:11:02,486 --> 00:11:04,037
Don't know why I said that.
332
00:11:06,039 --> 00:11:07,039
I got to go.
333
00:11:08,058 --> 00:11:09,809
See you black home.
334
00:11:10,944 --> 00:11:13,296
Pretty sure I know why I said that.
335
00:11:15,282 --> 00:11:17,233
This is the most pain I've
ever been in in my life.
336
00:11:17,284 --> 00:11:19,669
And a horse once kicked me
into an electric fence.
337
00:11:19,703 --> 00:11:21,120
Well, C-Cam, yeah, you broke your arm.
338
00:11:21,171 --> 00:11:22,421
You got to go to the hospital.
339
00:11:22,423 --> 00:11:23,389
No. Not yet.
340
00:11:23,423 --> 00:11:24,590
I'll go in, draw myself a bath,
341
00:11:24,592 --> 00:11:25,825
pretend to fall and break my arm.
342
00:11:25,859 --> 00:11:27,410
In the meantime, go
get those painkillers
343
00:11:27,444 --> 00:11:29,161
that they gave you when
you twisted your ankle.
344
00:11:29,212 --> 00:11:30,963
- Oh, I think I threw those away.
- Did you?
345
00:11:31,014 --> 00:11:32,465
Or are they in the
nightstand next to your bed
346
00:11:32,516 --> 00:11:33,933
because they go good
with a glass of wine?
347
00:11:38,789 --> 00:11:39,538
Dad?
348
00:11:39,589 --> 00:11:41,040
Yeah?
349
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:42,425
Can you open these?
350
00:11:42,476 --> 00:11:43,642
'Course I can.
351
00:11:43,644 --> 00:11:44,944
Well? Will you?
352
00:11:44,946 --> 00:11:46,946
Uh... sure. Yeah. Now?
353
00:11:46,948 --> 00:11:47,913
Okay.
354
00:11:47,964 --> 00:11:49,048
Let's see here.
355
00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:50,349
Ohh! Ooh, you know what?
356
00:11:50,383 --> 00:11:51,851
There's a fun way to open these
357
00:11:51,885 --> 00:11:53,602
I don't know if I've ever taught you.
358
00:11:53,637 --> 00:11:55,020
There! Whoopsie-daisy!
359
00:11:55,071 --> 00:11:56,956
Bon appétit. Bath time!
360
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,457
Okay, so, I got the... Uh...
361
00:11:58,508 --> 00:11:59,809
What happened here?
362
00:11:59,843 --> 00:12:01,093
Daddy opened the chips.
363
00:12:01,144 --> 00:12:02,728
With what... a snowblower?
364
00:12:06,234 --> 00:12:08,117
Whew!
365
00:12:08,151 --> 00:12:09,869
Oh!
366
00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:11,554
- Oh!
- Oh, I wonder what that noise was.
367
00:12:11,588 --> 00:12:13,639
I hope Daddy's okay!
368
00:12:15,392 --> 00:12:16,775
- Daddy!
- Oh, no!
369
00:12:16,810 --> 00:12:18,444
Looks like you fell and
broke your, uh, left arm.
370
00:12:18,495 --> 00:12:19,912
No, Mitchell, I fell. I really fell.
371
00:12:19,946 --> 00:12:20,996
- Oh, really?
- Really.
372
00:12:21,031 --> 00:12:23,299
- Are you okay?
- My head hurts. And my arm.
373
00:12:23,350 --> 00:12:25,217
I'm never taking a bath again!
374
00:12:25,268 --> 00:12:26,385
Oh, great.
375
00:12:26,436 --> 00:12:27,803
Too bad you didn't fall
off a stripper pole.
376
00:12:27,854 --> 00:12:28,771
- Ow!
- I-I'm sorry.
377
00:12:28,805 --> 00:12:30,022
That is the left. Left.
378
00:12:31,908 --> 00:12:34,026
Well, this is the address
Alex's nerds gave me,
379
00:12:34,077 --> 00:12:37,112
but it's not where I
pictured a troll living.
380
00:12:37,163 --> 00:12:39,365
"After his performance in
'The Sound of Music, '
381
00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:42,117
Christopher Plummer went on to
a distinguished acting career.
382
00:12:42,168 --> 00:12:44,453
After Delgado's performance,
I expect he'll go on
383
00:12:44,504 --> 00:12:46,255
to a distinguished plumbing career."
384
00:12:46,289 --> 00:12:48,874
Focus! I need you to film
this for my show tomorrow.
385
00:12:51,761 --> 00:12:53,879
By the way, if the punk's under
18, you have to hit him.
386
00:12:53,930 --> 00:12:56,014
What?! I never agreed to that!
387
00:12:57,717 --> 00:12:58,717
Pritchett?
388
00:12:58,768 --> 00:13:00,102
Earl?
389
00:13:00,136 --> 00:13:01,637
You've got to be kidding me.
390
00:13:01,688 --> 00:13:02,971
What the hell are you doing here?
391
00:13:03,022 --> 00:13:05,891
I'm here to punch
LadyKiller in his fat face.
392
00:13:05,893 --> 00:13:08,393
I'm sorry. Can we start over?
I was on "Photo."
393
00:13:08,395 --> 00:13:10,145
Go ahead. Any time.
394
00:13:11,737 --> 00:13:12,703
You're pathetic.
395
00:13:12,808 --> 00:13:14,534
I crushed you in the closet game,
396
00:13:14,635 --> 00:13:16,166
and I'm crushing it on the Internet.
397
00:13:16,245 --> 00:13:18,346
Put that rat down, and I'll
crush you on your porch.
398
00:13:18,409 --> 00:13:21,211
Like that is gonna be any more
painful than your stupid rant,
399
00:13:21,245 --> 00:13:23,062
"When did restaurants get so loud?"
400
00:13:23,097 --> 00:13:24,364
I should have known it was you...
401
00:13:24,398 --> 00:13:26,573
all those typos from
your stubby fingers.
402
00:13:26,612 --> 00:13:28,167
Watch it. I got my mother's hands.
403
00:13:28,201 --> 00:13:29,752
You also have your mother's mustache.
404
00:13:29,793 --> 00:13:31,677
- Hold this!
- Hold this.
405
00:13:34,949 --> 00:13:37,300
That went on for a good 20 seconds.
406
00:13:41,188 --> 00:13:42,989
Why do we keep doing this?!
407
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:43,923
Who knows?
408
00:13:43,925 --> 00:13:45,358
Isn't it obvious?
409
00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:47,243
You two need each other.
It's what drives you.
410
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,128
The kid is right.
411
00:13:49,130 --> 00:13:51,897
Beating you is half the
reason I get out of bed.
412
00:13:51,932 --> 00:13:53,199
Locking horns.
413
00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:55,918
We made each other better than
I ever thought we could be.
414
00:13:55,969 --> 00:13:57,136
Pushed each other to greatness.
415
00:13:57,138 --> 00:13:58,604
We touched the sky.
416
00:13:58,638 --> 00:14:00,406
We're talking about closets here, right?
417
00:14:00,457 --> 00:14:02,258
Oh, I'm sorry... You mean the sanctuary
418
00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:04,210
where a man dons his
armor in the morning
419
00:14:04,244 --> 00:14:05,911
and takes stock of the battle at night?!
420
00:14:05,962 --> 00:14:08,113
The one thing we all have in common...
421
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:10,850
presidents to postmen,
tycoons to teachers,
422
00:14:10,901 --> 00:14:12,618
from sea to shining sea!
423
00:14:12,669 --> 00:14:13,919
This is taking a weird turn.
424
00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:16,322
We did kind of bring out the
best in each other, didn't we?
425
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,741
Why did you have to retire, Pritchett?
426
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:19,792
I miss the fire.
427
00:14:19,794 --> 00:14:21,093
I guess I miss it, too.
428
00:14:21,144 --> 00:14:23,062
All right, here's something.
429
00:14:23,096 --> 00:14:24,363
What if we do the show together?
430
00:14:24,365 --> 00:14:25,698
What? No!
431
00:14:25,700 --> 00:14:28,017
I'm not gonna let you glom
onto my new hit show!
432
00:14:28,051 --> 00:14:29,268
43 views.
433
00:14:29,270 --> 00:14:31,437
We could do like a...
like a point/counterpoint
434
00:14:31,439 --> 00:14:32,504
kind of thing.
435
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,340
Like I would say something like, uh...
436
00:14:34,391 --> 00:14:36,475
"Let's get rid of pennies,"
and you would say...
437
00:14:36,526 --> 00:14:37,977
Of course we should get rid of pennies!
438
00:14:38,011 --> 00:14:39,044
They're annoying to own
439
00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:40,546
and make you feel bad
when you throw them out.
440
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:42,698
All right, what... what if
I said, "I miss milkmen"?
441
00:14:42,732 --> 00:14:44,066
Who doesn't miss milkmen?
442
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:46,051
The glass bottle, little bow tie.
443
00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:48,020
What am I, an idiot? I
don't miss milkmen?
444
00:14:48,071 --> 00:14:49,655
Okay, well, then you think of something!
445
00:14:49,657 --> 00:14:50,789
I'm not the one auditioning.
446
00:14:50,791 --> 00:14:52,424
Okay.
447
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:55,928
Here's something that represents
my unique brand of thinking.
448
00:14:55,962 --> 00:14:58,797
When I fly, I like luggage fees.
449
00:14:58,799 --> 00:14:59,932
Me too.
450
00:14:59,966 --> 00:15:01,900
Why should us carry-on
folk have to foot the bill
451
00:15:01,951 --> 00:15:03,702
for those morons who
don't know how to pack?!
452
00:15:03,753 --> 00:15:05,637
Three weeks, I went from
Edinburgh to Warsaw
453
00:15:05,639 --> 00:15:07,940
on two pairs of pants
and a tam-o'-shanter.
454
00:15:07,942 --> 00:15:08,740
I'm falling asleep.
455
00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,342
- I love naps!
- Who doesn't?
456
00:15:10,376 --> 00:15:11,760
This is ridiculous!
457
00:15:11,811 --> 00:15:14,529
The irony that, despite you
two being mortal enemies,
458
00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:15,781
it appears you agree on everything?
459
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:16,582
No!
460
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:18,300
It's that this jackass thinks
461
00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:20,702
he can actually bring something
new to "Jay Talking."
462
00:15:20,737 --> 00:15:22,621
Come on! We would be magic!
463
00:15:22,623 --> 00:15:24,056
You already stole one company from me.
464
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:25,057
You're not getting this.
465
00:15:25,108 --> 00:15:27,859
Okay, fine!
466
00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:30,495
I will start my own show.
467
00:15:30,546 --> 00:15:33,065
I'll call it... "Earls of Wisdom."
468
00:15:33,067 --> 00:15:34,066
Can't wait.
469
00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:35,584
I'll see you in the comments section.
470
00:15:35,618 --> 00:15:37,069
I'll just turn the comments off.
471
00:15:37,970 --> 00:15:39,571
- You can do that?
- Yeah.
472
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,723
Then why am I here?!
473
00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:44,626
Really, you don't have to do this.
474
00:15:44,677 --> 00:15:46,211
If I don't drive you to get your keys,
475
00:15:46,262 --> 00:15:47,395
how are you gonna get your car?
476
00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:48,313
Well, thank you.
477
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:49,414
This is me right here.
478
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:50,715
Not here. Not here. Two down.
479
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:52,017
Oh, there's a stomach cramp.
480
00:15:53,402 --> 00:15:55,454
Much better. Uh, right here.
481
00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:57,973
With the mailbox that
says "Porterfields"?
482
00:15:58,007 --> 00:16:00,825
Yep. It is a joke that we play
with the mailman. Long story.
483
00:16:00,860 --> 00:16:02,544
I will be right back.
484
00:16:26,252 --> 00:16:26,968
Hello?
485
00:16:27,002 --> 00:16:28,887
Hey, Claire? It's Ra.
486
00:16:28,938 --> 00:16:29,938
Oh. Hi.
487
00:16:29,972 --> 00:16:32,157
The readout said "Ira Burnbaum."
488
00:16:32,224 --> 00:16:34,676
Yeah. Uh, "Ra" is short for "Ira."
489
00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:36,761
Anyway, I was wondering if
you wanted to get together,
490
00:16:36,812 --> 00:16:38,079
maybe grab a shower and a movie?
491
00:16:39,031 --> 00:16:40,698
No. No.
492
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:43,101
Oh, I am... Mm.
493
00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:46,154
Ira, I'm a married woman.
That's not gonna happen.
494
00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:48,756
Wow. I didn't pick up that
energy when I was planking you.
495
00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:49,807
Mm.
496
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:50,859
Aaah! Ohh!
497
00:16:50,893 --> 00:16:52,277
Phil! What are you doing home?
498
00:16:52,328 --> 00:16:54,162
I lost my car keys. Who
were you talking to?
499
00:16:54,213 --> 00:16:56,047
- Nobody. Why are your pants ripped?
- No reason.
500
00:16:56,049 --> 00:16:57,715
Here they are. See you later!
501
00:17:05,140 --> 00:17:06,791
Hey! There you are.
502
00:17:06,825 --> 00:17:07,859
Off we go.
503
00:17:07,910 --> 00:17:09,627
Phil, why didn't you show me this house?
504
00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:10,895
It has everything I want.
505
00:17:10,929 --> 00:17:12,313
I forgot it was for sale.
506
00:17:12,348 --> 00:17:13,398
You're the agent.
507
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,116
Oh. I remember... It's built cheap.
508
00:17:15,167 --> 00:17:17,585
It... looks pretty solid to me.
509
00:17:17,636 --> 00:17:19,137
Well, it's mostly held up by beehives.
510
00:17:19,171 --> 00:17:21,072
- Let's go.
- Phil, what is going on?
511
00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:23,291
Nothing. Just trying to keep you
away from all that asbestos.
512
00:17:23,325 --> 00:17:25,043
Do you not want me as a neighbor?
513
00:17:25,077 --> 00:17:26,677
Okay.
514
00:17:26,729 --> 00:17:29,030
I-I can't do this anymore. No more lies.
515
00:17:29,081 --> 00:17:30,581
It is related to that.
516
00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:32,083
Wow.
517
00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:34,268
I did not peg you for a racist.
518
00:17:34,319 --> 00:17:35,820
Wait. No, no, no, no, no!
519
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:37,238
Wait, wait, wait. Angie...
520
00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:39,123
It's always the last people you think.
521
00:17:39,158 --> 00:17:40,725
We're done. Goodbye, Phil.
522
00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:43,227
No, Angie! That's not it!
523
00:17:43,278 --> 00:17:46,881
I lied to my wife because she knows
I have a thing for black women!
524
00:17:46,932 --> 00:17:47,965
Oh, really?
525
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:49,066
Hey, there!
526
00:17:49,117 --> 00:17:51,202
So, that was Angie O'Hara?
527
00:17:51,253 --> 00:17:52,753
Okay.
528
00:17:52,788 --> 00:17:53,804
Full disclosure...
529
00:17:53,839 --> 00:17:54,555
Mm-hmm.
530
00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:56,607
- ...I did lie.
- Mm-hmm.
531
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:59,126
But only because she's beautiful
and you get a little crazy.
532
00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:02,997
Why the hell did I say that?!
533
00:18:06,385 --> 00:18:07,218
I'm sorry.
534
00:18:07,269 --> 00:18:09,020
Oh, it's okay.
535
00:18:09,071 --> 00:18:11,288
You're being so understanding.
It's so unlike you.
536
00:18:11,323 --> 00:18:12,456
Are you secretly mad?
537
00:18:12,507 --> 00:18:14,792
Are you lulling me into a
false sense of security?
538
00:18:14,826 --> 00:18:17,061
Are you gonna do something
to me while I'm asleep?
539
00:18:17,112 --> 00:18:20,030
Phil, you know what really gets my goat?
540
00:18:20,082 --> 00:18:21,832
That you lied.
541
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:23,200
Guess men are men.
542
00:18:23,235 --> 00:18:24,652
I don't know why I
expected anything more.
543
00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:27,204
Hello?
544
00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:29,173
I want to apologize. You were right.
545
00:18:29,175 --> 00:18:32,610
It did bother me that Ra
gave you all the attention.
546
00:18:32,661 --> 00:18:35,145
He's an attractive man, and
you're a very sexy woman.
547
00:18:35,180 --> 00:18:37,565
Of course he put his hands all over you.
548
00:18:37,599 --> 00:18:38,849
- What?!
- Ra?
549
00:18:39,851 --> 00:18:41,151
It's Phil.
550
00:18:41,153 --> 00:18:41,902
Oh.
551
00:18:41,953 --> 00:18:43,787
B-Bye-bye!
552
00:18:43,838 --> 00:18:45,556
Claire...
553
00:18:45,590 --> 00:18:48,525
You know what really gets my goat?
554
00:18:48,527 --> 00:18:50,711
Okay, Lily. Let's do this.
555
00:18:50,745 --> 00:18:52,129
Can we just please give this a rest
556
00:18:52,163 --> 00:18:53,380
until you're fully recovered?
557
00:18:53,431 --> 00:18:54,632
No. Mitchell, we're in too deep.
558
00:18:54,682 --> 00:18:56,233
I have a broken arm,
and I can't remember
559
00:18:56,267 --> 00:18:57,735
any of my grade-school teachers' names.
560
00:18:57,786 --> 00:18:59,369
Yeah, you've mentioned
that four times now.
561
00:18:59,371 --> 00:19:00,921
Have I really? Yeah.
562
00:19:00,972 --> 00:19:03,056
All right. Uh, Lily, let's...
let's get on the bike.
563
00:19:03,108 --> 00:19:04,191
- Carefully. Carefully.
- Yep.
564
00:19:04,225 --> 00:19:05,609
One leg at a time over.
565
00:19:05,611 --> 00:19:07,244
Feet on the pedals. Perfect.
566
00:19:07,295 --> 00:19:08,412
And then we start pedaling.
567
00:19:08,414 --> 00:19:09,546
Mitchell, we start pedaling.
568
00:19:09,597 --> 00:19:11,181
Good. Now let go.
569
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,065
- Don't let go!
- Okay.
570
00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:13,183
Mitchell, let go.
571
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:14,818
- I'm not ready.
- She's not ready!
572
00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:16,253
Mitchell, sidebar, please.
573
00:19:16,287 --> 00:19:17,454
Okay. Okay. Stopping.
574
00:19:17,505 --> 00:19:19,206
Just put your feet down. Be right back.
575
00:19:19,257 --> 00:19:21,558
What's wrong, Lily? Don't you
know how to ride a bike?
576
00:19:21,609 --> 00:19:24,378
Yeah, Sydney. I'm just showing
him how to teach a kid.
577
00:19:24,412 --> 00:19:26,830
Okay, I'm dragging my feet
because I have a brain injury.
578
00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:28,465
Why are you dragging yours, again?
579
00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:29,967
Because I don't want her to get hurt!
580
00:19:30,018 --> 00:19:31,818
No, see, it's not the
worst thing in the world
581
00:19:31,853 --> 00:19:33,620
that she's actually
starting to be cautious.
582
00:19:33,655 --> 00:19:36,423
She used to fly off of bookcases
and jump off of swing sets,
583
00:19:36,474 --> 00:19:38,425
and now she's trying to protect herself.
584
00:19:38,476 --> 00:19:39,843
And what kind of life is she gonna have
585
00:19:39,894 --> 00:19:41,061
if she's scared of everything?
586
00:19:41,112 --> 00:19:42,496
A life where I don't
have to worry about her.
587
00:19:42,530 --> 00:19:43,964
Ohh. I get it.
588
00:19:43,998 --> 00:19:45,665
So you're the one that's afraid.
589
00:19:45,717 --> 00:19:47,050
It's dangerous out there.
590
00:19:47,085 --> 00:19:49,469
T-There's so much weird stuff
going on in the world,
591
00:19:49,504 --> 00:19:51,671
and I just... I want her to be safe.
592
00:19:51,723 --> 00:19:54,591
I guess we can wait a couple
weeks if she wants to.
593
00:19:54,593 --> 00:19:55,425
Lily, it's...
594
00:19:56,477 --> 00:19:57,427
Lily?
595
00:19:57,478 --> 00:19:58,428
Lily?!
596
00:19:58,479 --> 00:19:59,513
Cam, look!
597
00:19:59,564 --> 00:20:02,015
Oh, my gosh! That's so great!
598
00:20:02,066 --> 00:20:03,767
God, I hope so.
599
00:20:03,818 --> 00:20:05,936
Ohh, everything's gonna be okay.
600
00:20:05,938 --> 00:20:06,987
Yeah.
601
00:20:07,021 --> 00:20:08,989
Miss Tweeddale... fourth grade.
602
00:20:09,023 --> 00:20:11,441
Mr. Kleezak! Mr. Lundgren!
603
00:20:11,492 --> 00:20:12,776
I'm back!
604
00:20:12,827 --> 00:20:14,778
Ow! Oh, my God. I tol...
605
00:20:18,429 --> 00:20:20,256
Angie, thank you so much for meeting me.
606
00:20:20,281 --> 00:20:22,116
- This is my wife, Claire.
- Hi.
607
00:20:22,140 --> 00:20:25,585
You need to know that my husband is
the furthest thing from a racist.
608
00:20:25,703 --> 00:20:28,371
- I love black women.
- Maybe a little too much.
609
00:20:28,422 --> 00:20:32,125
So, I told her that you were
white, which is the only reason
610
00:20:32,176 --> 00:20:34,010
I didn't want you living
across the street.
611
00:20:34,045 --> 00:20:35,762
I didn't want her to find
out that I was lying.
612
00:20:35,796 --> 00:20:38,298
- Is that true?
- Sadly, yes.
613
00:20:38,349 --> 00:20:39,849
Well, I am relieved.
614
00:20:39,884 --> 00:20:42,886
Although it is a little offensive
to be reduced to a type.
615
00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:44,304
Of course. I'm sorry.
616
00:20:44,815 --> 00:20:48,820
- Hey, babe. Everything okay?
- Yeah, everything is fine.
617
00:20:48,867 --> 00:20:51,352
Just a big misunderstanding.
This is Phil.
618
00:20:51,429 --> 00:20:52,257
- Hi.
- Hi.
619
00:20:52,397 --> 00:20:53,796
And his wife, Claire.
620
00:20:53,906 --> 00:20:55,109
- Hi.
- Well...
621
00:20:55,679 --> 00:20:56,765
Hello.
622
00:20:57,461 --> 00:20:59,445
Yeah, apology accepted.
623
00:20:59,625 --> 00:21:00,727
I'm on fire.
624
00:21:01,156 --> 00:21:03,953
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