1 00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:04,950 - Hey, Cam. - Louise, what are you doing here? 2 00:00:04,975 --> 00:00:06,867 You're not dropping out of the league championship tonight, are you? 3 00:00:06,892 --> 00:00:08,945 Louise is dropping out of the league championship? 4 00:00:08,970 --> 00:00:10,421 Did you shoot yourself in the leg again? 5 00:00:10,446 --> 00:00:12,523 Oh, my God, we're one win away from my first sports trophy, 6 00:00:12,548 --> 00:00:13,625 and then this happens. 7 00:00:13,650 --> 00:00:15,171 All I said was "Hey, Cam." 8 00:00:15,196 --> 00:00:17,242 So, this year, I invited Mitchell 9 00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,976 to join my gay bowling team... the Britney Spares. 10 00:00:20,001 --> 00:00:21,940 I came up with the team name, I designed the shirts. 11 00:00:21,965 --> 00:00:23,331 It's not important who gets the credit. 12 00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:26,491 When we first stated, my bowling was, um... well, it was iffy. 13 00:00:26,516 --> 00:00:28,609 But then I practiced and I practiced 14 00:00:28,634 --> 00:00:32,015 until the shoe-rental guy called me "decent." 15 00:00:32,328 --> 00:00:33,773 I'm not here as a teammate. 16 00:00:33,798 --> 00:00:35,998 - I'm here on official police business. - What? 17 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:38,218 Please tell me that is not you. 18 00:00:38,243 --> 00:00:39,398 What is that? 19 00:00:40,548 --> 00:00:42,000 Oh, no. 20 00:00:42,246 --> 00:00:43,273 Oh. 21 00:00:43,298 --> 00:00:44,523 Oh. 22 00:00:47,675 --> 00:00:48,688 No, no, no. 23 00:00:48,735 --> 00:00:50,101 - Hmm. - That's Fizbo... 24 00:00:50,126 --> 00:00:51,437 - Mm-hmm. - ... with a scary mask. 25 00:00:51,462 --> 00:00:53,468 - That's clearly not me. - It's not him. 26 00:00:53,493 --> 00:00:55,159 No! Who would do that? 27 00:00:55,184 --> 00:00:56,697 Who would take something so beautiful 28 00:00:56,722 --> 00:00:58,861 and turn it into something so ugly? 29 00:00:58,912 --> 00:01:00,411 How did the guy get the costume? 30 00:01:00,436 --> 00:01:01,755 Oh, who knows? 31 00:01:01,780 --> 00:01:03,306 Your father gave it to charity. 32 00:01:03,331 --> 00:01:04,629 By accident. 33 00:01:04,654 --> 00:01:06,079 How did I not hear that fight? 34 00:01:06,104 --> 00:01:07,400 Was I in town? 35 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:09,519 All right, then, uh, case closed. 36 00:01:09,544 --> 00:01:10,822 I'll see you guys tonight. 37 00:01:10,847 --> 00:01:12,816 What? No "case closed." 38 00:01:12,841 --> 00:01:14,369 We haven't even found the perp! 39 00:01:14,394 --> 00:01:16,165 Look, the only reason I was following up on this 40 00:01:16,190 --> 00:01:17,806 is 'cause I thought it might be you. 41 00:01:17,831 --> 00:01:19,392 Well, yeah, but we have to get my costume back. 42 00:01:19,417 --> 00:01:21,126 We have to restore Fizbo's good name. 43 00:01:21,151 --> 00:01:23,151 Oh, but we're... we're still gonna go bowling, right? 44 00:01:23,176 --> 00:01:24,204 Wow. 45 00:01:24,229 --> 00:01:25,603 You give away my beloved alter ego, 46 00:01:25,628 --> 00:01:27,267 and you won't even allow me 30 seconds 47 00:01:27,292 --> 00:01:28,947 to have an emotional reaction? 48 00:01:28,972 --> 00:01:30,783 Yeah. No, it sounded fast as I was saying it. 49 00:01:40,075 --> 00:01:43,192 Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb www.addic7ed.com 50 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,895 And now for the finishing touch. 51 00:01:47,105 --> 00:01:49,005 Franks for Frank! 52 00:01:49,030 --> 00:01:51,137 Dad's bachelor party's gonna be epic. 53 00:01:51,162 --> 00:01:53,085 You couldn't see it. That's why... Boom! 54 00:01:53,110 --> 00:01:55,950 Chicken wraps, white wine, fudge. 55 00:01:55,975 --> 00:01:57,327 Is this a bachelor party 56 00:01:57,352 --> 00:01:59,973 or a party where ladies sit around watching "The Bachelor"? 57 00:01:59,998 --> 00:02:02,184 And why did you get me a triple-XL? 58 00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:03,507 The lady said it'd shrink in the wash. 59 00:02:03,532 --> 00:02:05,222 - How's it gonna do in the trash? - Jay. 60 00:02:05,247 --> 00:02:07,713 Kidding. I'll use it to wash my car. 61 00:02:07,782 --> 00:02:10,403 My dad is marrying my old babysitter Lorraine, 62 00:02:10,428 --> 00:02:11,629 who has a son, 63 00:02:11,654 --> 00:02:15,614 which means that I am finally getting a brother! 64 00:02:15,857 --> 00:02:17,567 When I was young, I wanted a brother so much, 65 00:02:17,592 --> 00:02:19,364 my folks got me bunk beds. 66 00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:21,638 At night, I'd pretend he was up there and talk to him, 67 00:02:21,663 --> 00:02:23,763 and when he didn't answer back, I always just figured, 68 00:02:23,788 --> 00:02:26,575 "Well, Marty's in a mood again." 69 00:02:31,038 --> 00:02:33,223 Excuse me. Do you serve crabs here? 70 00:02:33,248 --> 00:02:34,896 We serve anyone. 71 00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:36,829 Jokes only get old because they're good, right? 72 00:02:38,075 --> 00:02:39,144 Nailed it. 73 00:02:39,169 --> 00:02:40,402 Phil, this is Ray. 74 00:02:40,427 --> 00:02:43,145 Wow. I guess we're gonna be brothers. 75 00:02:43,170 --> 00:02:44,360 Bring it in. 76 00:02:44,385 --> 00:02:46,090 - Ah. Oh! - Oh! No. 77 00:02:46,115 --> 00:02:47,857 Oh! What's happening? 78 00:02:47,882 --> 00:02:49,648 We're brothers! Isn't this what brothers do? 79 00:02:49,673 --> 00:02:51,310 I don't know, but I love it! 80 00:02:51,335 --> 00:02:52,435 Whoa! 81 00:02:52,626 --> 00:02:54,703 This guy totally tried to touch my ding-dong. 82 00:02:54,728 --> 00:02:55,819 - Oh. - I didn't know 83 00:02:55,844 --> 00:02:56,986 it was that kind of party. 84 00:02:57,011 --> 00:02:59,111 I guess you didn't see the white wine and fudge. 85 00:02:59,136 --> 00:03:01,804 White wine? That's not gonna get me there. 86 00:03:02,035 --> 00:03:03,401 Am I the only one who sees me 87 00:03:03,426 --> 00:03:04,691 choking that guy out tonight? 88 00:03:04,764 --> 00:03:05,770 I don't know. 89 00:03:05,795 --> 00:03:07,193 I got a good feeling about Ray, 90 00:03:07,218 --> 00:03:08,568 and I-I felt a lot of him. 91 00:03:08,593 --> 00:03:10,279 He's just a little wound up from the drive. 92 00:03:10,304 --> 00:03:13,232 I'm sure you'll find he's a real solid citizen. 93 00:03:14,381 --> 00:03:16,615 The sap across the hall left his door open. 94 00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:17,715 That's my room! 95 00:03:17,740 --> 00:03:20,518 Oh. So, I guess you'll need these. 96 00:03:22,389 --> 00:03:24,112 Before we start, thanks for agreeing 97 00:03:24,137 --> 00:03:26,166 to do this read through of my latest play, 98 00:03:26,191 --> 00:03:28,335 "A Withering Farewell Under a Harvest Moon"... 99 00:03:28,362 --> 00:03:30,560 - So catch... - ... colon, "The Tears of Angels." 100 00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,334 - So catchy! - Right? 101 00:03:32,359 --> 00:03:34,259 It's a story of four women who come together 102 00:03:34,284 --> 00:03:35,930 to mourn the loss of the family patriarch. 103 00:03:35,955 --> 00:03:38,295 Oh, no. So sad, so very sad. 104 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:40,580 Pace yourself, crazy. We haven't even started. 105 00:03:40,605 --> 00:03:42,244 A man died, Claire. 106 00:03:42,269 --> 00:03:43,301 A fake man, 107 00:03:43,326 --> 00:03:45,683 and if he was a patriarch, he was a fake old man, 108 00:03:45,708 --> 00:03:46,887 and old men die. 109 00:03:46,912 --> 00:03:48,122 Surely, this is a thought 110 00:03:48,147 --> 00:03:50,901 that has occurred to you from time to time, huh? 111 00:03:51,252 --> 00:03:52,526 Please don't make me part of this. 112 00:03:52,551 --> 00:03:53,650 Anyway, when it's over, 113 00:03:53,675 --> 00:03:55,041 feel free to share your thoughts... 114 00:03:55,066 --> 00:03:57,514 what you liked, what you loved, but also the negatives... 115 00:03:57,539 --> 00:03:59,839 what went over your head, any words you didn't know. 116 00:03:59,871 --> 00:04:02,672 I'm submitting my latest play to a young playwrights festival, 117 00:04:02,697 --> 00:04:04,096 but I want to hear it out loud first 118 00:04:04,121 --> 00:04:06,110 to be sure I've hit all my emotional marks. 119 00:04:06,230 --> 00:04:08,565 One might ask, "Why all female characters?" 120 00:04:08,667 --> 00:04:11,040 Let's just say, write what you know. 121 00:04:11,213 --> 00:04:13,537 Wait. To clarify, I understand women. 122 00:04:13,562 --> 00:04:15,610 I don't feel like I am one. 123 00:04:16,766 --> 00:04:18,109 110 pages? 124 00:04:18,134 --> 00:04:19,509 What time are we supposed to get out of here? 125 00:04:19,534 --> 00:04:21,087 Oh, honey, you got a hot date tonight? 126 00:04:21,112 --> 00:04:23,446 Mom, don't be mean. Ignore her. 127 00:04:23,471 --> 00:04:25,324 I actually am in a relationship, 128 00:04:25,349 --> 00:04:26,805 but I've been hiding it from everybody 129 00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:29,062 because I have once again chosen somebody 130 00:04:29,087 --> 00:04:31,287 that is completely inappropriate. 131 00:04:31,478 --> 00:04:33,071 It's this older guy... Ben. 132 00:04:33,096 --> 00:04:36,731 He works for my mother, and he lives with his mother. 133 00:04:36,961 --> 00:04:38,760 I'm like a moth to a flame 134 00:04:38,785 --> 00:04:41,063 if the flame is an underachieving man-child 135 00:04:41,088 --> 00:04:43,790 with a Tasmanian Devil tattoo on his butt. 136 00:04:43,869 --> 00:04:46,016 Sorry, this is going to take longer than I expected. 137 00:04:46,041 --> 00:04:47,649 - Can you wait there? - Sure. 138 00:04:47,674 --> 00:04:50,188 My mom's got her poker girls over, anyway. 139 00:04:50,213 --> 00:04:52,960 This one lady, Karen, she gets real handsy with me. 140 00:04:52,985 --> 00:04:54,175 She's not un-hot, either. 141 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,415 She's like an older, curvy... 142 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,393 Emily Blunt but Indian. 143 00:04:58,418 --> 00:05:00,058 Don't try to make me jealous, Ben. 144 00:05:00,083 --> 00:05:01,430 One of my regulars at the coffee shop 145 00:05:01,455 --> 00:05:03,895 is always asking if I want to do some motorboating. 146 00:05:03,920 --> 00:05:05,953 If I didn't get seasick, I'd go. 147 00:05:06,879 --> 00:05:09,173 Now, okay, I don't want to get ahead of myself, 148 00:05:09,198 --> 00:05:11,326 but does the trophy have each of our names, 149 00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:12,551 or is it just the team name, 150 00:05:12,576 --> 00:05:14,606 'cause I kind want one of my own, but... 151 00:05:14,631 --> 00:05:16,259 You know what? No, never mind. I'll just get it engraved. 152 00:05:16,284 --> 00:05:17,642 Okay, how can you be thinking 153 00:05:17,667 --> 00:05:19,733 about bowling at a time like this? 154 00:05:19,801 --> 00:05:22,302 You mean as we're going in to our bowling championship? 155 00:05:23,393 --> 00:05:24,554 Oh. Text message. 156 00:05:24,579 --> 00:05:26,587 Read text message. 157 00:05:26,612 --> 00:05:28,342 You have a message from Martin. 158 00:05:28,410 --> 00:05:29,809 "I keep picturing you guys 159 00:05:29,878 --> 00:05:31,445 "holding the trophy later tonight. 160 00:05:31,470 --> 00:05:32,602 "Just kidding. 161 00:05:32,627 --> 00:05:34,643 "You're not invited to my victory party. 162 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:35,676 "Ha ha." 163 00:05:37,753 --> 00:05:38,783 Oh. 164 00:05:39,447 --> 00:05:40,620 Hello, Martin. 165 00:05:40,660 --> 00:05:42,336 Hello, Cameron. Hello, Mitchell. 166 00:05:42,361 --> 00:05:43,799 Where's the rest of Britney Queers? 167 00:05:43,824 --> 00:05:46,425 It's the Britney Spares, Martin. 168 00:05:46,528 --> 00:05:48,233 The Britney Queers were eliminated weeks ago. 169 00:05:48,258 --> 00:05:49,424 Yes, by us. 170 00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:52,049 Eventually, all will fall to The Gay City Bowlers. 171 00:05:52,074 --> 00:05:53,916 I forget. Do all the names have to be puns? 172 00:05:53,941 --> 00:05:55,311 Yes. It's like hair salons. 173 00:05:55,336 --> 00:05:57,046 Unpleasant as always, Martin. 174 00:05:57,071 --> 00:05:58,404 I'll see you in the alley. 175 00:05:58,506 --> 00:06:00,557 I'm sure you say that to a lot of men. 176 00:06:03,010 --> 00:06:04,654 Mitchell! Fizbo! 177 00:06:04,679 --> 00:06:06,179 - What? - Over there! 178 00:06:06,247 --> 00:06:07,729 Cam... Cam, do you think it's possible 179 00:06:07,754 --> 00:06:09,715 with how upset you are about Fizbo 180 00:06:09,740 --> 00:06:11,262 that... that maybe you're seeing things? 181 00:06:11,287 --> 00:06:12,325 Oh. No. 182 00:06:12,350 --> 00:06:14,903 Maybe it's another guy with purple hair and a size 23 shoe. 183 00:06:14,928 --> 00:06:17,231 Maybe Dennis Rodman bowls here! 184 00:06:18,776 --> 00:06:21,009 And we begin. 185 00:06:21,034 --> 00:06:23,268 "Lights up on the living room of James Pickett. 186 00:06:23,293 --> 00:06:25,893 "The furnishings and art tell us he was a wealthy man, 187 00:06:25,918 --> 00:06:27,385 "but his money couldn't buy taste. 188 00:06:27,410 --> 00:06:29,978 "Enter four women in black returning from a funeral. 189 00:06:30,003 --> 00:06:32,244 "First, James' widow Chloe Dubois-Pickett"... 190 00:06:32,269 --> 00:06:33,322 That's me! 191 00:06:33,347 --> 00:06:35,127 "... a beautiful French commoner who married up." 192 00:06:35,152 --> 00:06:36,197 Ooh, là là. 193 00:06:36,222 --> 00:06:37,926 "Next is Bailey, the granddaughter... 194 00:06:37,951 --> 00:06:39,751 "cute as a button and just as smart." 195 00:06:39,819 --> 00:06:40,985 I like her. 196 00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:42,803 "Following her is James' sister, 197 00:06:42,828 --> 00:06:44,732 "Professor Alma Diller, 60s. 198 00:06:44,757 --> 00:06:46,240 "There's no problem she can't solve 199 00:06:46,265 --> 00:06:47,896 "except her own loneliness. 200 00:06:47,921 --> 00:06:49,764 "Finally, James' daughter Kate... 201 00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:52,090 "attractive, intense, sharp-tongued, 202 00:06:52,115 --> 00:06:53,582 "fleeting moments of warmth." 203 00:06:53,607 --> 00:06:55,357 "Fleeting moments of warmth"? 204 00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:56,600 I get it. 205 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,087 This is the story of the four of us 206 00:06:58,112 --> 00:06:59,813 through some sort of distorted Manny lens. 207 00:06:59,838 --> 00:07:00,881 Yeah, just because I'm smart, 208 00:07:00,906 --> 00:07:02,225 - I end up a spinster? - Mm-hmm. 209 00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:03,615 You know what I could be doing right now 210 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:05,506 - if I didn't get seasick? - Okay, calm down. 211 00:07:05,531 --> 00:07:07,043 These characters are a compilation 212 00:07:07,068 --> 00:07:09,217 of many other women I've known, not you people. 213 00:07:09,242 --> 00:07:10,568 Okay, let's start. 214 00:07:10,593 --> 00:07:13,094 "Kate enters and crosses straight to the credenza. 215 00:07:13,119 --> 00:07:15,990 "As she pours herself a much-needed glass of wine"... 216 00:07:16,974 --> 00:07:18,014 Mm. 217 00:07:18,328 --> 00:07:19,356 Right. 218 00:07:19,381 --> 00:07:21,023 "To be honest, I can't believe 219 00:07:21,092 --> 00:07:23,159 "the old grump didn't die years ago." 220 00:07:23,227 --> 00:07:26,193 Nice. My first line is something horrible about my dead dad. 221 00:07:26,218 --> 00:07:27,521 How cold do you think I am? 222 00:07:27,546 --> 00:07:28,964 Didn't I just say it's not you? 223 00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:32,177 - Isn't it, though? - What? 224 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:35,136 "Old people die, get over it"? 225 00:07:35,177 --> 00:07:36,605 That was, like, 20 minutes ago. 226 00:07:36,630 --> 00:07:38,774 - Okay, now, hang on a second. - Okay, this seems like a whole thing, 227 00:07:38,799 --> 00:07:40,253 so I'm just gonna go grab a water real quick. 228 00:07:40,278 --> 00:07:41,710 Oh, come on. 229 00:07:43,576 --> 00:07:45,326 - Who are you texting? - Ahh! No one. 230 00:07:45,351 --> 00:07:46,537 I'm just reading my horoscope. 231 00:07:46,562 --> 00:07:48,685 Liar. Why would anyone read their horoscope so late in the day? 232 00:07:48,710 --> 00:07:50,218 Everything's already happened. 233 00:07:50,321 --> 00:07:52,404 - There's a dude, isn't there? - What? No. 234 00:07:52,429 --> 00:07:54,787 Sneaking off with your phone, the clean hair, 235 00:07:54,812 --> 00:07:57,091 your one bra that fits properly... spill. 236 00:07:57,177 --> 00:07:58,256 Okay, fine. 237 00:07:58,281 --> 00:07:59,599 There is a dude. 238 00:07:59,624 --> 00:08:01,474 Oh, God, it's not another high-school boy, is it? 239 00:08:01,499 --> 00:08:02,545 No. He's legal. 240 00:08:02,570 --> 00:08:04,402 He's just embarrassing in a different way. 241 00:08:04,427 --> 00:08:06,144 You know you've been like this your whole life... 242 00:08:06,169 --> 00:08:08,937 ashamed of the romantic, sexual part of you. 243 00:08:08,972 --> 00:08:10,738 Honestly, it seems like you think you don't deserve it, 244 00:08:10,763 --> 00:08:11,795 but you do. 245 00:08:11,820 --> 00:08:13,620 And if this guy is fun and good to you 246 00:08:13,645 --> 00:08:15,405 and doesn't ride a scooter, 247 00:08:15,613 --> 00:08:17,071 let it be okay. 248 00:08:17,305 --> 00:08:18,478 Haley. 249 00:08:18,849 --> 00:08:20,209 Thanks. 250 00:08:20,273 --> 00:08:22,072 Ladies, I don't know what emotional thing 251 00:08:22,097 --> 00:08:23,107 is playing out right now, 252 00:08:23,132 --> 00:08:24,697 but how about you save it for over there? 253 00:08:24,817 --> 00:08:27,017 And then I sent you the cutest video 254 00:08:27,042 --> 00:08:29,422 of a puppy nursing on a mama lion, 255 00:08:29,447 --> 00:08:30,912 and what do you text back? 256 00:08:30,957 --> 00:08:32,259 "She's getting him fat 257 00:08:32,284 --> 00:08:34,209 so that he tastes better at lunch"? 258 00:08:34,234 --> 00:08:36,507 Yeah, so what? My crime is I'm hilarious? 259 00:08:36,532 --> 00:08:38,267 Can we get back to this, please? 260 00:08:38,292 --> 00:08:39,842 Kate just said she couldn't believe 261 00:08:39,867 --> 00:08:42,046 her father didn't die sooner, then... 262 00:08:42,071 --> 00:08:44,881 "The Widow Dubois slumps in a chair, emotional." 263 00:08:44,906 --> 00:08:47,232 "Ohh, ma chérie, 264 00:08:47,257 --> 00:08:50,158 "your papa would be devastated to hear you say 265 00:08:50,183 --> 00:08:52,216 "such insensitive things." 266 00:08:52,524 --> 00:08:53,523 Really? 267 00:08:53,548 --> 00:08:56,392 Are you gonna do the whole accent thing? 268 00:08:57,332 --> 00:08:59,167 Lo and behold... 269 00:08:59,353 --> 00:09:00,890 what do we see? 270 00:09:01,091 --> 00:09:03,145 The queen of spades is gone! 271 00:09:03,170 --> 00:09:04,634 Where could she be? 272 00:09:04,659 --> 00:09:07,005 In Frank's pocket. I saw you put it there. 273 00:09:07,858 --> 00:09:09,424 So it is! 274 00:09:09,577 --> 00:09:11,197 Great trick, Phil. 275 00:09:11,222 --> 00:09:12,578 And nice assist, Ray. 276 00:09:12,603 --> 00:09:15,111 I thought this was supposed to be a bachelor party. 277 00:09:15,136 --> 00:09:17,253 Where's the female entertainment? 278 00:09:17,278 --> 00:09:19,544 Oh, don't you worry about that. 279 00:09:19,604 --> 00:09:21,976 ♪ Mr. Sandman ♪ 280 00:09:22,001 --> 00:09:24,111 - ♪ Bring me a dream ♪ - ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪ 281 00:09:24,136 --> 00:09:27,090 ♪ Make him the cutest that I've ever seen ♪ 282 00:09:27,115 --> 00:09:28,210 ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪ 283 00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:29,506 ♪ Give him two lips ♪ 284 00:09:29,531 --> 00:09:32,103 - ♪ Like roses and clover ♪ - ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪ 285 00:09:32,128 --> 00:09:34,046 ♪ And tell him that his lonesome nights are... ♪ 286 00:09:34,071 --> 00:09:35,204 What are you doing?! 287 00:09:35,229 --> 00:09:36,696 Calling time of death. 288 00:09:36,721 --> 00:09:37,763 Oh, not you ladies. 289 00:09:37,788 --> 00:09:39,521 You're still very vital, of course. 290 00:09:39,546 --> 00:09:40,545 Hey, we really appreciate 291 00:09:40,570 --> 00:09:42,522 all the riveting you did during the war. 292 00:09:42,547 --> 00:09:44,014 Dad was enjoying them. 293 00:09:44,039 --> 00:09:45,739 Just as well. 294 00:09:45,764 --> 00:09:46,930 I'm about to be married. 295 00:09:46,955 --> 00:09:48,024 I don't need to be tempted 296 00:09:48,049 --> 00:09:49,938 by all those bum, bum, bums. 297 00:09:49,963 --> 00:09:52,180 Oh, is that it for the planned activities? 298 00:09:52,205 --> 00:09:53,760 No, we're just getting started. 299 00:09:53,785 --> 00:09:56,551 For the next hour, it's a $5 buy-in game of Uno, 300 00:09:56,576 --> 00:09:58,799 then downstairs to Captain Scupper's, 301 00:09:58,824 --> 00:10:00,655 the best oysters in the desert. 302 00:10:00,680 --> 00:10:02,783 And finally, put on your neckties, gentlemen, 303 00:10:02,808 --> 00:10:04,496 'cause I have four balcony seats... 304 00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,267 to Mr. Neil... 305 00:10:06,292 --> 00:10:08,403 - Please say "Diamond." - ... Sedaka. 306 00:10:08,428 --> 00:10:09,687 What a night! 307 00:10:09,712 --> 00:10:11,278 Oh, we need some ice. 308 00:10:11,303 --> 00:10:12,703 I'll be right back. 309 00:10:12,728 --> 00:10:13,760 What the hell's Uno? 310 00:10:13,785 --> 00:10:15,986 Sort of a thinking man's Crazy Eights. 311 00:10:16,011 --> 00:10:17,849 Instead of playing cards up here, 312 00:10:17,874 --> 00:10:20,030 there is a casino downstairs 313 00:10:20,055 --> 00:10:21,579 with actual big-boy drinks. 314 00:10:21,604 --> 00:10:22,965 I'm right behind him. 315 00:10:23,059 --> 00:10:24,730 We'll grab Phil on the way. 316 00:10:24,755 --> 00:10:27,374 Or wouldn't it be fun for him... 317 00:10:27,399 --> 00:10:29,124 to try and find us? 318 00:10:29,149 --> 00:10:31,351 Oh, he'll love that! 319 00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:33,382 Hey, Louise, 320 00:10:33,414 --> 00:10:34,846 I just saw that psycho imposter clown 321 00:10:34,871 --> 00:10:36,833 out by the dumpster giving me threatening looks. 322 00:10:36,858 --> 00:10:38,424 - Look, Flouncy... - It's Fizbo. 323 00:10:38,449 --> 00:10:39,582 I'm talking to you. 324 00:10:39,607 --> 00:10:42,040 I don't have time for your clown nonsense. 325 00:10:42,065 --> 00:10:43,708 We've got a championship to win. 326 00:10:43,733 --> 00:10:45,863 I'm gonna go warm up with the Pindigo Girls. 327 00:10:46,942 --> 00:10:49,042 Why does this have to be happening today? 328 00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:50,820 Mitchell, 329 00:10:50,845 --> 00:10:53,424 maybe it's happening because it's today. 330 00:10:53,521 --> 00:10:55,748 Maybe somebody is trying to get in my head 331 00:10:55,773 --> 00:10:57,172 to throw me off my game. 332 00:10:57,197 --> 00:10:59,130 Oh, honey, do you really think people care enough to... 333 00:10:59,155 --> 00:11:01,750 Hey, you know what, there are six people just in my eyesight 334 00:11:01,775 --> 00:11:03,816 that would do anything to break my winning streak. 335 00:11:03,841 --> 00:11:05,908 For instance, Martin. 336 00:11:06,968 --> 00:11:08,561 He's never forgiven me for making him feel 337 00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:09,719 like your father was in love with him. 338 00:11:09,744 --> 00:11:10,743 Okay, it couldn't have been Martin. 339 00:11:10,768 --> 00:11:12,816 We saw him, like, three seconds before you thought that you saw Fiz... 340 00:11:12,841 --> 00:11:13,873 - Actually saw. - Okay. 341 00:11:13,898 --> 00:11:14,909 And what's this about my dad? 342 00:11:14,934 --> 00:11:16,368 Fine. It's not Martin. 343 00:11:16,463 --> 00:11:18,696 But it certainly could be Señor Kaplan. 344 00:11:18,734 --> 00:11:21,801 Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis. 345 00:11:22,309 --> 00:11:24,159 Hola, Señor Kaplan. 346 00:11:24,228 --> 00:11:25,968 If you're here to talk trash, I'm not interested. 347 00:11:25,993 --> 00:11:27,010 Where were you 20 minutes ago, 348 00:11:27,035 --> 00:11:28,663 and can anybody account for your whereabouts? 349 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:29,855 Not that it's any of your business, 350 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:32,270 but I happened to be in the photo booth taking some solos. 351 00:11:32,371 --> 00:11:34,104 I'm gonna use number three for my new passport. 352 00:11:34,129 --> 00:11:35,981 I would use number two. There's a twinkle in your eye. 353 00:11:36,006 --> 00:11:37,238 But I have a different theory 354 00:11:37,263 --> 00:11:38,562 as to where you were 20 minutes ago, 355 00:11:38,587 --> 00:11:41,016 and it would have given you exactly enough time 356 00:11:41,041 --> 00:11:43,854 to change out of a clown costume into your bowling outf... 357 00:11:46,081 --> 00:11:47,358 - What's wrong? - Wha... No. No, no. 358 00:11:47,383 --> 00:11:48,750 I just saw... I just saw Fi... Fizbo 359 00:11:48,818 --> 00:11:50,053 in... in... in the mirror. 360 00:11:50,078 --> 00:11:51,663 I don't know what's going on with you, Tucker, 361 00:11:51,688 --> 00:11:53,379 but in my culture, we like to call it... 362 00:11:53,404 --> 00:11:55,338 loco en la cabeza. 363 00:11:55,363 --> 00:11:57,454 Okay, you know what? Knock it off. You're Canadian. 364 00:11:58,907 --> 00:12:00,978 "You all seem to forget I'm not alone. 365 00:12:01,003 --> 00:12:02,376 "I have Albert. 366 00:12:02,401 --> 00:12:04,071 "You can search the world, and I defy you 367 00:12:04,096 --> 00:12:06,674 "to find a more devoted, loving... 368 00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:08,449 "parrot." 369 00:12:08,474 --> 00:12:10,373 "I used to like talking to Albert, 370 00:12:10,398 --> 00:12:12,683 "but then we got into a fight over a cracker." 371 00:12:12,708 --> 00:12:15,002 "Kate whispers to Bailey as they watch the Widow 372 00:12:15,027 --> 00:12:17,026 "sadly plunking notes on the piano." 373 00:12:17,051 --> 00:12:19,194 "How long do we have to stay with her? 374 00:12:19,219 --> 00:12:21,076 "We can leave now, right?" 375 00:12:21,101 --> 00:12:22,803 "I knew when your papa died, 376 00:12:22,828 --> 00:12:24,793 "I would never see you again." 377 00:12:24,818 --> 00:12:26,876 "No matter what I do, 378 00:12:26,901 --> 00:12:28,510 "you refuse to accept 379 00:12:28,555 --> 00:12:30,643 "that I accepted you." 380 00:12:30,668 --> 00:12:31,688 "Mais non. 381 00:12:31,713 --> 00:12:32,712 "I'm sorry. 382 00:12:32,737 --> 00:12:35,014 "I'm just so emotional today." 383 00:12:35,039 --> 00:12:36,806 "But of course you are, Chloe. 384 00:12:36,831 --> 00:12:40,106 "And I'm sorry if I made you feel like an outsider." 385 00:12:40,131 --> 00:12:43,078 "I love you, you know? Je t'aime." 386 00:12:43,327 --> 00:12:44,766 "I love you, too." 387 00:12:44,935 --> 00:12:45,982 Black out. 388 00:12:46,050 --> 00:12:47,716 Bravo! Bravo! 389 00:12:47,741 --> 00:12:48,790 Really, Manny? 390 00:12:48,815 --> 00:12:51,397 My character gets into a fight with a parrot over a cracker? 391 00:12:51,422 --> 00:12:53,191 I told you that story in confidence. 392 00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:55,007 And for the record... 393 00:12:55,639 --> 00:12:57,873 I am nothing like my character. 394 00:12:57,898 --> 00:12:58,937 I'm not lonely at all. 395 00:12:58,962 --> 00:13:00,275 I have tons of options. 396 00:13:00,300 --> 00:13:01,530 I'm actually going to see one right now. 397 00:13:01,555 --> 00:13:02,611 And thanks to Haley, 398 00:13:02,636 --> 00:13:03,976 I'm no longer ashamed of talking about him. 399 00:13:04,027 --> 00:13:05,451 Ooh! Who is it? 400 00:13:05,476 --> 00:13:06,512 - No one. - What's his name? 401 00:13:06,537 --> 00:13:07,802 - Nothing. - But... 402 00:13:07,871 --> 00:13:09,214 Well, if that's it for the feedback... 403 00:13:09,239 --> 00:13:10,939 - No, actually... - Oh. Yay. 404 00:13:11,008 --> 00:13:14,259 ... for me, the ending felt a little trite. 405 00:13:14,284 --> 00:13:15,644 There's a lot of good stuff in there, 406 00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:17,879 but the whole "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, 407 00:13:17,904 --> 00:13:19,532 "I love you, I love you"... I just... 408 00:13:19,662 --> 00:13:21,844 I think women are more complicated than that. 409 00:13:21,973 --> 00:13:23,518 Don't listen to her, Manny. 410 00:13:23,587 --> 00:13:24,818 The ending was beautiful. 411 00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:27,078 It's just that some women have a hard time 412 00:13:27,103 --> 00:13:28,849 expressing their feelings. 413 00:13:28,874 --> 00:13:29,890 Oh, this again? 414 00:13:29,915 --> 00:13:32,800 - Gloria, I'm a very feeling person. - Oh, really? 415 00:13:32,825 --> 00:13:35,540 From the woman that writes in my birthday cards 416 00:13:35,565 --> 00:13:37,065 "Best, Claire." 417 00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:38,166 How is that not warm? 418 00:13:38,191 --> 00:13:40,368 I am wishing you quite literally the best. 419 00:13:40,437 --> 00:13:41,969 I am a person in your family. 420 00:13:41,994 --> 00:13:44,715 I am not the woman that does your eyebrows. 421 00:13:44,740 --> 00:13:47,052 Why would I send her a birthday card? 422 00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:48,439 The question is... 423 00:13:48,464 --> 00:13:51,120 why can't you write "Love, Claire"? 424 00:13:51,145 --> 00:13:52,813 I write "Love, Gloria." 425 00:13:52,848 --> 00:13:56,083 I even dot the "I" with a huge heart. 426 00:13:56,151 --> 00:13:58,918 I tell you that I love you, and you say "Me, too." 427 00:13:58,943 --> 00:14:01,065 Why? Why can't you tell me that you love me? 428 00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:03,022 I don't know why I can't tell you that I... 429 00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:04,791 There was a time when I wanted to, 430 00:14:04,826 --> 00:14:07,327 and then the moment passed and time went by 431 00:14:07,396 --> 00:14:09,262 and then it just felt forced. 432 00:14:09,298 --> 00:14:10,970 You... you say it all the time. 433 00:14:10,995 --> 00:14:12,709 One could argue that dilutes it. 434 00:14:12,734 --> 00:14:13,800 Oh, so now it's my fault? 435 00:14:13,902 --> 00:14:14,960 I am lashing out at you 436 00:14:14,985 --> 00:14:17,030 because this is not the first time... 437 00:14:17,072 --> 00:14:18,821 I've been accused of this. 438 00:14:18,846 --> 00:14:22,010 I am sorry I haven't said it before, Gloria. 439 00:14:22,035 --> 00:14:23,306 I love you. 440 00:14:23,886 --> 00:14:25,111 I love you. 441 00:14:25,179 --> 00:14:26,737 - Mm. - Okay. 442 00:14:27,315 --> 00:14:28,645 My God, you're right. 443 00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:29,986 It is trite. 444 00:14:31,627 --> 00:14:33,193 - You got this, Sam! - Come on. 445 00:14:33,387 --> 00:14:34,471 Come on! 446 00:14:34,496 --> 00:14:36,899 You on the other hand... you throw one more gutter ball, 447 00:14:36,924 --> 00:14:39,576 and I will literally frame you for murder. 448 00:14:39,985 --> 00:14:41,180 No pressure. 449 00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:49,804 Mwah! 450 00:14:50,170 --> 00:14:51,939 I wonder what that's about. 451 00:14:52,435 --> 00:14:53,505 Oh! Shh, shh, shh! 452 00:14:53,607 --> 00:14:55,411 - Shh, shh, shh! - Hmm. 453 00:14:55,575 --> 00:14:57,142 You two seem awfully chummy. 454 00:14:57,167 --> 00:14:58,376 Well, if by "chummy," you mean, 455 00:14:58,411 --> 00:15:01,179 "in the throes of an electric sexual relationship," 456 00:15:01,281 --> 00:15:04,133 then, yes, you bet your bowling balls we're chummy. 457 00:15:06,986 --> 00:15:08,853 Oh, my gosh. 458 00:15:08,921 --> 00:15:10,488 I just put it all together. 459 00:15:10,550 --> 00:15:12,288 You're both Fizbo. 460 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:13,328 When I'm with one of you, 461 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,610 the other's wearing the costume, creating the perfect alibi. 462 00:15:15,635 --> 00:15:16,961 Light-bulb moment! 463 00:15:16,986 --> 00:15:17,995 This clown thing again. 464 00:15:18,064 --> 00:15:20,297 Look, Tucker, if I wanted to get back at you 465 00:15:20,332 --> 00:15:22,101 for, oh, I don't know, say something like 466 00:15:22,126 --> 00:15:24,100 setting me up with your straight father-in-law, 467 00:15:24,125 --> 00:15:26,925 I certainly wouldn't do it by stealing your stupid Bozo suit. 468 00:15:26,950 --> 00:15:29,235 - It's Fizbo. - Way to take the high road, sweetie. 469 00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:31,724 First, I'd hack your e-mails, 470 00:15:32,046 --> 00:15:34,837 then I'd create several fake social-media accounts, 471 00:15:34,862 --> 00:15:37,295 which I would use to mount the multi-pronged smear campaign 472 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,720 to drive a wedge between you and everything you love. 473 00:15:40,042 --> 00:15:41,341 Wow. 474 00:15:41,366 --> 00:15:43,293 That's maybe a bit of a red flag. 475 00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:45,468 And then I'd get several credit cards in your name 476 00:15:45,493 --> 00:15:47,760 and then embark on a massive identity-theft scheme 477 00:15:47,785 --> 00:15:49,218 that would leave you bankrupt 478 00:15:49,270 --> 00:15:51,061 and, with any luck at all, facing criminal charges. 479 00:15:51,085 --> 00:15:52,403 - That's what I'd do. - Okay. 480 00:15:52,428 --> 00:15:54,129 She's a bit of a handful, huh? 481 00:15:54,154 --> 00:15:55,514 You know, I was thinking, maybe we should take a beat 482 00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:56,737 on meeting your parents this weekend. 483 00:15:56,762 --> 00:15:57,870 What do you say? All right. 484 00:15:58,554 --> 00:15:59,576 What? 485 00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:01,927 Bravo! 486 00:16:01,952 --> 00:16:03,404 Bravo. 487 00:16:03,429 --> 00:16:06,965 If you think your little over-the-top revenge monologue 488 00:16:07,001 --> 00:16:09,530 is gonna throw me off your scent, 489 00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:11,803 then you are sorely mistaken. 490 00:16:11,905 --> 00:16:14,506 Now open your bag. 491 00:16:14,608 --> 00:16:16,289 - What? - All of you, 492 00:16:16,314 --> 00:16:17,701 open your bags! 493 00:16:17,726 --> 00:16:19,316 You don't have... Cam, you got to stop. 494 00:16:19,341 --> 00:16:20,409 - Open them! - Hey, hey! 495 00:16:20,434 --> 00:16:21,823 You're paranoid. You are paranoid. 496 00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:23,606 No one is dressing up... 497 00:16:23,956 --> 00:16:25,322 Oh, damn it, I hate it when you're right. 498 00:16:25,347 --> 00:16:26,881 What... Oh! There he is! 499 00:16:26,906 --> 00:16:28,463 Chase him! Get him! 500 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:29,935 Stop! 501 00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:31,145 Imposter! 502 00:16:32,937 --> 00:16:34,038 - Oh. - Close your door, ma'am! 503 00:16:34,063 --> 00:16:36,088 - We're in pursuit! Thank you! - Okay, okay, okay. 504 00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:38,738 Okay. 505 00:16:40,724 --> 00:16:42,358 - We lost him. - Wait. His mask. 506 00:16:43,420 --> 00:16:45,620 - It smells like beer and cheese fires. - Oh, Mitchell, 507 00:16:45,645 --> 00:16:46,935 - that's good investigative work. - Yes. 508 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,760 You've narrowed it down to everyone in the bowling alley. 509 00:16:57,123 --> 00:16:58,277 Uno. 510 00:17:00,372 --> 00:17:01,375 There you are. 511 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:03,133 We've been looking all over for you. 512 00:17:03,158 --> 00:17:05,792 Did you check in here, in the room where the party is? 513 00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:07,917 Don't worry. We didn't forget about you. 514 00:17:08,387 --> 00:17:10,008 - Boop. - I hope it was worth it. 515 00:17:10,033 --> 00:17:11,883 We missed our reservation to Captain Scupper's. 516 00:17:11,908 --> 00:17:13,306 Don't worry, Phil. We ate. 517 00:17:13,331 --> 00:17:15,646 Pit boss sent some shrimp cocktails over to our craps table. 518 00:17:15,671 --> 00:17:17,709 Along with some regular cocktails, am I right? 519 00:17:17,734 --> 00:17:18,745 Yeah! 520 00:17:20,059 --> 00:17:21,659 You... you had to be there. 521 00:17:21,684 --> 00:17:23,082 I get it. You had shrimp and drinks. 522 00:17:23,107 --> 00:17:24,483 Now, if it's not too much trouble, 523 00:17:24,508 --> 00:17:25,724 maybe we could get back on schedule. 524 00:17:25,749 --> 00:17:27,479 We don't want to miss Sedaka's opening act... 525 00:17:27,504 --> 00:17:28,670 Extremely Little Richard. 526 00:17:28,700 --> 00:17:30,933 Good golly, is he small! 527 00:17:30,958 --> 00:17:32,892 Change of plans... I traded those tickets 528 00:17:32,917 --> 00:17:34,819 for seats to "Sexcalibur." 529 00:17:34,844 --> 00:17:36,967 - You what? - It's a dirty "Medieval Times." 530 00:17:36,992 --> 00:17:38,315 Are you kidding me? 531 00:17:38,340 --> 00:17:39,605 It's okay, Phil. 532 00:17:39,630 --> 00:17:42,065 I waited 79 years to see Neil Sedaka. 533 00:17:42,090 --> 00:17:43,881 I can wait another 79. 534 00:17:43,906 --> 00:17:45,652 No, Dad. You're being too nice. 535 00:17:45,677 --> 00:17:48,751 This is your bachelor party, not yours! 536 00:17:48,776 --> 00:17:50,308 You're ruining this whole night. 537 00:17:50,333 --> 00:17:52,110 You ruined it when you planned it. 538 00:17:52,135 --> 00:17:54,252 And get that finger out of my face. 539 00:17:54,277 --> 00:17:56,414 Nobody hijacks my dad's party, 540 00:17:56,439 --> 00:17:58,823 and nobody tells me where... 541 00:17:58,848 --> 00:18:00,198 to put my finger. 542 00:18:00,452 --> 00:18:01,505 Boop! 543 00:18:02,042 --> 00:18:03,108 Here we go. 544 00:18:04,762 --> 00:18:06,565 I wanted a brother when I was 10, 545 00:18:06,590 --> 00:18:07,900 not a 10-year-old brother! 546 00:18:07,925 --> 00:18:09,156 You're the baby! 547 00:18:09,181 --> 00:18:11,246 You're older, but you're the baby. 548 00:18:11,271 --> 00:18:12,607 You're no Marty! 549 00:18:12,632 --> 00:18:14,065 It's not much of a fight, but maybe we should... 550 00:18:14,116 --> 00:18:16,246 I know. I thought it was gonna get good. 551 00:18:16,271 --> 00:18:18,470 All right, that's enough. Stop. 552 00:18:18,495 --> 00:18:19,728 Phil, you're being ridiculous. 553 00:18:19,753 --> 00:18:22,587 Ray, I don't know you, but you seem like a horse's ass. 554 00:18:22,612 --> 00:18:24,578 All right, now! Grow up! 555 00:18:24,603 --> 00:18:26,202 Start acting like gentlemen. 556 00:18:26,227 --> 00:18:28,001 Uh, would you two mind 557 00:18:28,026 --> 00:18:29,765 stepping out in the hall for a second? 558 00:18:29,790 --> 00:18:32,252 - I need to have a word with Phil. - All right, but hurry up. 559 00:18:32,277 --> 00:18:34,778 We don't want to miss the unlacing of the first wench. 560 00:18:35,044 --> 00:18:36,230 You know, I really appreciate 561 00:18:36,255 --> 00:18:38,979 all you've done arranging my party, but, you know, 562 00:18:39,113 --> 00:18:41,217 I'm happy doing whatever. 563 00:18:41,242 --> 00:18:42,882 Is something else bothering you? 564 00:18:42,907 --> 00:18:44,219 I don't know. 565 00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:46,217 So much is changing, Dad. 566 00:18:46,242 --> 00:18:48,898 I guess I'm kind of afraid that this is the end of an era. 567 00:18:48,923 --> 00:18:51,291 Now I have to share you with Lorraine, with that. 568 00:18:51,316 --> 00:18:53,034 You're not losing me. 569 00:18:53,059 --> 00:18:55,398 As a matter of fact, you're gonna be seeing a lot more of me. 570 00:18:55,423 --> 00:18:58,509 Lorraine and I have been kind of kicking around the idea of... 571 00:18:58,581 --> 00:19:00,336 moving to California. 572 00:19:00,554 --> 00:19:02,012 To be closer to me? 573 00:19:02,037 --> 00:19:03,436 Yes. 574 00:19:03,461 --> 00:19:05,658 And to be farther from Ray. 575 00:19:07,181 --> 00:19:08,458 Hey, Louise, 576 00:19:08,483 --> 00:19:10,215 we just saw evil Fizbo again. 577 00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:12,357 It's true. I was there. We lost him in the parking lot. 578 00:19:12,382 --> 00:19:13,412 Yeah, we looked in every car. 579 00:19:13,437 --> 00:19:15,430 Geez, Louise, there has to be something you can do. 580 00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:17,150 Fine. First thing tomorrow, I'll look into it... 581 00:19:17,175 --> 00:19:18,894 - if you can focus on bowling. - I can. 582 00:19:18,919 --> 00:19:20,691 There you are. I've been looking all over for you. 583 00:19:20,722 --> 00:19:22,423 - It's your turn. - Sorry. I was in the ladies room. 584 00:19:22,448 --> 00:19:24,200 I was putting IcyHot on my hammies. 585 00:19:24,225 --> 00:19:25,249 Mm. 586 00:19:26,045 --> 00:19:27,411 Ahh! Ohh. 587 00:19:27,436 --> 00:19:28,835 D-Did you do something to your hand? 588 00:19:28,860 --> 00:19:30,535 I just hurt it playing air hockey. 589 00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,359 They got rid of the air hockey table months ago. 590 00:19:32,384 --> 00:19:33,918 Uh... nothing. I mean, I was... 591 00:19:33,943 --> 00:19:35,710 Wait... w-wait... wait a minute. 592 00:19:35,735 --> 00:19:36,867 You go missing, 593 00:19:36,892 --> 00:19:39,005 then you mysteriously hurt your hand, and t... 594 00:19:39,030 --> 00:19:41,650 Okay, okay... there is lipstick in this mask, 595 00:19:41,675 --> 00:19:43,198 and it is... it is the same shade 596 00:19:43,223 --> 00:19:44,765 as the lipstick on your beer. 597 00:19:44,790 --> 00:19:46,690 You're Fizbo? 598 00:19:46,715 --> 00:19:47,747 You wear lipstick? 599 00:19:47,772 --> 00:19:49,391 But you're on our team. 600 00:19:49,416 --> 00:19:50,790 Why would you do this? 601 00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:52,383 Because you bug me. 602 00:19:53,205 --> 00:19:54,311 That's it? 603 00:19:54,336 --> 00:19:56,603 You picked the team name, you designed the shirts, 604 00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:57,664 you take all the credit. 605 00:19:57,689 --> 00:19:59,056 Everything's about you. 606 00:19:59,081 --> 00:20:02,114 You messed with his head so he'd lose us the team championship. 607 00:20:02,139 --> 00:20:04,524 Yeah, opening the door for... for you to be captain. 608 00:20:04,549 --> 00:20:05,952 I should be captain. 609 00:20:05,977 --> 00:20:09,043 Give me my Fizbo. 610 00:20:12,942 --> 00:20:13,986 You get out of my face. 611 00:20:14,011 --> 00:20:15,170 Wait, wait, no. Hold on. Hold on. 612 00:20:15,195 --> 00:20:16,844 Is there still a chance that we could win this? 613 00:20:16,869 --> 00:20:19,448 Not unless we can pick up 57 pins in one frame. 614 00:20:19,473 --> 00:20:21,720 Yeah. And you get out of his face. 615 00:20:24,267 --> 00:20:26,715 Hello, fruit of your father's loins. 616 00:20:26,740 --> 00:20:27,934 "Mitchell's" fine. 617 00:20:27,959 --> 00:20:29,339 You know, speaking of Jay... 618 00:20:29,364 --> 00:20:30,367 You brought him up. 619 00:20:30,392 --> 00:20:33,220 Well, your father and I had a moment... 620 00:20:33,245 --> 00:20:35,035 - Uh-huh... - ... a couple of years ago 621 00:20:35,137 --> 00:20:37,537 when he was pretending to be gay 622 00:20:37,562 --> 00:20:39,294 so that he could bowl in our league. 623 00:20:39,319 --> 00:20:40,718 I know he said it was all an act, 624 00:20:40,743 --> 00:20:43,043 but what I felt from him... 625 00:20:43,112 --> 00:20:44,654 It was just so very real. 626 00:20:44,679 --> 00:20:46,218 Okay, Martin, I hate to break this to you, 627 00:20:46,243 --> 00:20:49,025 but my dad is potentially the straightest man on the planet. 628 00:20:49,050 --> 00:20:50,196 Yeah, but that not withstanding, 629 00:20:50,221 --> 00:20:52,352 do you think maybe you could give me his phone number? 630 00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:54,920 It's just always felt like unfinished business to me. 631 00:20:54,945 --> 00:20:56,656 I am not giving you his phone number. 632 00:20:56,681 --> 00:20:59,248 - I'll give you my trophy. - It's 3-1-0...