1 00:00:01,008 --> 00:00:02,908 We got some bad news yesterday. 2 00:00:03,008 --> 00:00:06,308 Phil's mom died. It wasn't unexpected. 3 00:00:06,508 --> 00:00:09,908 He was with her and she went very peacefully in her sleep. 4 00:00:10,108 --> 00:00:11,608 She and I had a special connection. 5 00:00:11,808 --> 00:00:13,808 - We all did. - But mostly me. 6 00:00:14,008 --> 00:00:15,408 She said I was just like her. 7 00:00:15,908 --> 00:00:17,108 Was she weirdly competitive too? 8 00:00:17,882 --> 00:00:20,282 The whole family is going down to Florida 9 00:00:20,282 --> 00:00:21,482 tomorrow to be with Phil for the service. 10 00:00:22,561 --> 00:00:23,661 Such a relief. 11 00:00:23,721 --> 00:00:26,521 I can feel how much he needs me right now. 12 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,820 There they are. 13 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:31,520 Hey, guys. 14 00:00:32,959 --> 00:00:34,079 Oh, you brought my neck pillow. 15 00:00:34,300 --> 00:00:35,972 I missed you so much. 16 00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:38,727 Phil, I'm so sorry. 17 00:00:39,241 --> 00:00:39,914 Thanks. 18 00:00:39,915 --> 00:00:42,687 Grace was such a kind and whimsical soul. 19 00:00:42,688 --> 00:00:45,865 The different animals she put antlers on for Christmas cards-- 20 00:00:45,948 --> 00:00:46,752 inspired. 21 00:00:46,753 --> 00:00:48,382 Not a single one was photoshopped. 22 00:00:48,383 --> 00:00:50,764 - Not even the alligator? - Cost her the tip of her pinkie, 23 00:00:50,765 --> 00:00:52,226 - but she had no regrets. - Oh! 24 00:00:53,153 --> 00:00:54,188 I'm so glad you guys are here. 25 00:00:54,189 --> 00:00:56,016 I hope it wasn't too hard to get away from work. 26 00:00:56,017 --> 00:00:58,048 No. Please, anything for family. 27 00:00:58,159 --> 00:00:59,983 Anything to get me out of that office. 28 00:01:00,498 --> 00:01:03,354 Ugh! It's all boring paperwork and endless meetings. 29 00:01:03,770 --> 00:01:06,317 Honestly, this funeral could not have come at a better time. 30 00:01:06,318 --> 00:01:08,721 Aw, that's sweet. You should put that on the flowers. 31 00:01:09,963 --> 00:01:11,850 Gloria, you must be so hot in that. 32 00:01:11,851 --> 00:01:15,365 I am in mourning. In Colombia, we take death very seriously. 33 00:01:15,366 --> 00:01:16,026 Where don't they? 34 00:01:16,027 --> 00:01:18,473 Can we lose the veil? Nobody's looking for you, Gloria. 35 00:01:18,474 --> 00:01:19,754 Who is Gloria? 36 00:01:20,236 --> 00:01:22,350 I am a wanted woman in Florida. 37 00:01:22,630 --> 00:01:24,741 I used to live there, and when I left, 38 00:01:24,742 --> 00:01:29,429 my roommate made our apartment into a house of prostitution, 39 00:01:29,563 --> 00:01:31,092 and my name was still on the lease. 40 00:01:31,093 --> 00:01:32,076 It's like a traffic ticket. 41 00:01:32,077 --> 00:01:33,941 You walk into court, pay a fine, it's done. 42 00:01:34,063 --> 00:01:34,892 Quick and easy. 43 00:01:34,893 --> 00:01:37,269 Yes, that was the name of the whorehouse. 44 00:01:37,874 --> 00:01:39,481 Mitchell, can you go with her to court? 45 00:01:39,482 --> 00:01:41,075 She's gonna need some sort of lawyer. 46 00:01:41,076 --> 00:01:43,272 Uh, you know, Jay, Mitchell is so burnt out right now. 47 00:01:43,273 --> 00:01:44,957 He is in desperate need of a break. 48 00:01:44,958 --> 00:01:47,001 Bench warrants are a no-brainer. And, I mean, come on. 49 00:01:47,002 --> 00:01:48,740 Does Gloria really look like the kind of woman 50 00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,064 who would run a brothel? 51 00:01:52,602 --> 00:01:53,681 - Yeah, I better go with her. - You should go. 52 00:01:53,682 --> 00:01:54,672 - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. 53 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,751 There they are! 54 00:02:09,752 --> 00:02:10,988 - Hey. - Hi. 55 00:02:10,989 --> 00:02:12,273 Oh, you look beautiful. Hi, Claire. 56 00:02:12,274 --> 00:02:13,434 How are you holding on, hmm? 57 00:02:13,435 --> 00:02:14,186 Oh, well, you know... 58 00:02:14,187 --> 00:02:15,650 We're getting through it. Huh, dad? 59 00:02:16,175 --> 00:02:18,152 Ah. I'm doing okay. A little trouble sleeping. 60 00:02:18,333 --> 00:02:19,396 I'm so used to her snoring, 61 00:02:19,397 --> 00:02:21,406 I may have to borrow the neighbor's bulldog. 62 00:02:23,013 --> 00:02:23,922 Morning, Charlotte! 63 00:02:23,923 --> 00:02:26,267 This is my family from California! 64 00:02:26,944 --> 00:02:29,779 I can tell. They all look like movie stars. 65 00:02:29,780 --> 00:02:30,703 Ah. Oh, thank you. 66 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:33,749 That's nuts. I know that woman, but I have no idea from where. 67 00:02:33,750 --> 00:02:35,929 Yeah. This place is full of stories like that. 68 00:02:37,983 --> 00:02:39,633 Good morning, Mr. Dunphy, visitors. 69 00:02:39,634 --> 00:02:41,872 - Please, Shelley, call me Frank. - No, sir. 70 00:02:41,873 --> 00:02:43,907 That might be the way they do things at Whistling Pines, 71 00:02:43,908 --> 00:02:46,084 but we run a tight ship here at Leisure Park. 72 00:02:46,085 --> 00:02:47,649 As per your request, I have reserved 73 00:02:47,650 --> 00:02:50,009 the lakeside promenade this evening for one hour, 74 00:02:50,010 --> 00:02:52,166 beginning at 5:00 P.M., for your memorial service. 75 00:02:52,167 --> 00:02:54,197 May I remind you that there's no smoking on the grounds, 76 00:02:54,198 --> 00:02:56,413 no glass near the lake, no feeding the ducks? 77 00:02:56,414 --> 00:02:57,105 And I'm sorry for your loss. 78 00:02:57,106 --> 00:02:59,416 - Thank you. - No feeding the ducks. 79 00:02:59,417 --> 00:03:01,169 What are you looking at me for? 80 00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:10,533 I love it here-- 81 00:03:10,540 --> 00:03:11,683 manicured lawns, 82 00:03:11,684 --> 00:03:13,565 planned activities, early dinners. 83 00:03:13,566 --> 00:03:14,857 What more does a kid need? 84 00:03:14,858 --> 00:03:16,632 Oh, yeah. And everyone's so polite and considerate-- 85 00:03:16,633 --> 00:03:18,725 nothing like the constant catfights in my circle, 86 00:03:18,726 --> 00:03:19,946 where every week, 87 00:03:19,947 --> 00:03:22,309 somebody's mad at somebody for God knows who what, 88 00:03:22,310 --> 00:03:24,158 and I'm always thrown into the middle. 89 00:03:24,242 --> 00:03:26,330 You seem tense. You know, they have a steam room. 90 00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:28,200 - Wanna join me for a schvitz? - Please, it's Florida. 91 00:03:28,201 --> 00:03:30,736 If I wanna sweat more, I'll just move my arms. You go have fun. 92 00:03:31,633 --> 00:03:32,561 Hey, you. 93 00:03:33,061 --> 00:03:34,335 Are you liking that book? 94 00:03:34,336 --> 00:03:36,408 Well, it's not the worst thing I've picked up at an airport, 95 00:03:36,409 --> 00:03:37,377 but close. 96 00:03:37,669 --> 00:03:38,617 What is this, 97 00:03:38,618 --> 00:03:40,587 a book club or a Miss America Pageant? 98 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:43,949 We're looking for our next book. 99 00:03:43,950 --> 00:03:44,918 Oh, what are you reading now? 100 00:03:44,919 --> 00:03:46,815 "Tempted by her innocent kiss." 101 00:03:47,303 --> 00:03:48,396 I-I'm sure you don't know it. 102 00:03:48,397 --> 00:03:50,908 Oh, please. Devon Carter was Ashley's first, 103 00:03:50,947 --> 00:03:52,584 she wants their passion to last, 104 00:03:52,585 --> 00:03:54,923 but her hopes of true love are crushed when she finds out 105 00:03:54,924 --> 00:03:57,643 their marriage is just another one of daddy's business deals. 106 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:58,993 I'm gay. 107 00:03:58,994 --> 00:04:01,002 Oh! My grandson is gay. 108 00:04:01,024 --> 00:04:03,742 His name is Daniel Schulman. Uh, do you know him? 109 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:06,911 Oh! Is he about this tall, dark hair, circumcised? 110 00:04:08,393 --> 00:04:09,615 Terrible. 111 00:04:10,164 --> 00:04:11,164 Don't be nervous, all right? 112 00:04:11,165 --> 00:04:12,337 I'll explain your situation. 113 00:04:12,338 --> 00:04:13,480 We'll have you out of here in no time. 114 00:04:13,481 --> 00:04:15,480 30 days in county jail. 115 00:04:16,559 --> 00:04:18,968 What? Ooh, she's tough. 116 00:04:19,084 --> 00:04:20,164 Next. 117 00:04:20,536 --> 00:04:23,244 Anita Menchaca. Petty theft. 118 00:04:23,245 --> 00:04:24,157 Si. 119 00:04:24,552 --> 00:04:26,764 Mister, you're a lawyer? Help me, please. 120 00:04:26,765 --> 00:04:28,149 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm her lawyer. 121 00:04:28,337 --> 00:04:30,973 No, no, help her, so this will go faster. 122 00:04:31,527 --> 00:04:32,894 And she reminds me of my abuela, 123 00:04:32,895 --> 00:04:36,147 with her head scarf and her petty theft charges. 124 00:04:36,869 --> 00:04:37,924 Here, your honor. 125 00:04:38,107 --> 00:04:40,414 I'm Mitchell Pritchett, attorney to Miss Manchego. 126 00:04:40,415 --> 00:04:41,514 - Menchaca. - Ah, yeah... 127 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,013 Are you ready to enter a plea? 128 00:04:43,014 --> 00:04:44,115 Absolutely. 129 00:04:44,116 --> 00:04:45,742 I see no reason why this matter should 130 00:04:45,743 --> 00:04:47,775 take up any more of the court's valuable time. 131 00:04:48,165 --> 00:04:49,163 Not guilty, your honor. 132 00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:50,068 Why? 133 00:04:51,530 --> 00:04:52,770 Gonna need a minute. 134 00:04:58,448 --> 00:04:59,857 Look what my dad just gave me. 135 00:05:00,618 --> 00:05:02,164 Please tell me that's not your mom. 136 00:05:02,165 --> 00:05:03,932 No, no. She picked out her own urn. 137 00:05:04,503 --> 00:05:05,083 My dad keeps saying 138 00:05:05,084 --> 00:05:07,365 it's a size too small but she squeezed into it. 139 00:05:08,484 --> 00:05:10,589 No, this is stuff she left for the kids. 140 00:05:11,384 --> 00:05:12,902 - Can I... open it? - Yeah. 141 00:05:13,638 --> 00:05:15,357 Wow. There's a note for you. 142 00:05:16,055 --> 00:05:17,111 I can't read it. 143 00:05:17,502 --> 00:05:18,489 - Okay. - Would you? 144 00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:19,345 All right. 145 00:05:22,532 --> 00:05:23,461 "Dear Phil, 146 00:05:23,846 --> 00:05:26,252 "you've always been the most wonderful son, 147 00:05:26,381 --> 00:05:28,613 and now I need you to do one last thing for me." 148 00:05:28,614 --> 00:05:29,395 Oh, no! 149 00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:32,060 She's gonna ask me to throw her ashes in the Pope's face. 150 00:05:33,564 --> 00:05:35,097 "Don't say anything to your father 151 00:05:35,098 --> 00:05:36,564 "because he'll just resist, 152 00:05:36,565 --> 00:05:38,562 "but there's a woman named Annie Fitzsimmons 153 00:05:38,563 --> 00:05:40,132 "who lives a few streets over. 154 00:05:40,133 --> 00:05:42,548 "We don't know her very well, but I've always admired her, 155 00:05:42,549 --> 00:05:45,077 "and I think she'd be perfect for your dad. 156 00:05:45,449 --> 00:05:47,940 So before you go home, I want you to fix him up with her." 157 00:05:47,941 --> 00:05:49,024 That is crazy! 158 00:05:49,025 --> 00:05:50,447 "I know this sounds crazy, 159 00:05:50,626 --> 00:05:52,698 "but single men are in short supply here. 160 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:54,462 "And a lot of scheming harpies will swoop in 161 00:05:54,463 --> 00:05:56,287 "before your father knows what hit him. 162 00:05:56,607 --> 00:05:58,701 I love Frank, but he'll follow anything with a casserole." 163 00:05:58,702 --> 00:06:00,168 I don't believe this. 164 00:06:00,539 --> 00:06:02,771 It's too soon, and my dad's not a cartoon bear. 165 00:06:02,772 --> 00:06:05,479 He's perfectly capable of making intelligent decisions. 166 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,271 Hey, guys? I made cookies. 167 00:06:07,272 --> 00:06:09,024 Oh, good. I thought that was a neighbor. 168 00:06:14,351 --> 00:06:17,143 Hey, kids, your grandma left each of you something. 169 00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,657 Cool! Rockports! 170 00:06:18,658 --> 00:06:19,878 It's just the box. 171 00:06:21,647 --> 00:06:23,175 Oh, my God. There's a letter. 172 00:06:23,309 --> 00:06:24,562 I don't know if I'm ready for this. 173 00:06:24,724 --> 00:06:25,746 Although if grandma wrote it, 174 00:06:25,747 --> 00:06:26,538 she must have sensed I was ready. 175 00:06:26,539 --> 00:06:28,187 Because you had such a bond? 176 00:06:28,547 --> 00:06:29,364 You felt it, too? 177 00:06:29,365 --> 00:06:30,898 Haley, why don't you tell us what yours says? 178 00:06:30,899 --> 00:06:32,109 Well, it's so sweet. 179 00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:34,378 It's about how beautiful I am inside and-- 180 00:06:34,379 --> 00:06:36,506 score! Jewelry 181 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:37,842 Whoa! Check it out! 182 00:06:37,843 --> 00:06:38,770 Oh, look at that. 183 00:06:38,926 --> 00:06:40,576 Your grandma loved pocket watches. 184 00:06:40,577 --> 00:06:42,243 - Aw! - She said they made a man look dignified. 185 00:06:42,244 --> 00:06:43,869 Is this chain in case you swallow it? 186 00:06:43,870 --> 00:06:45,615 No, but suddenly I'm glad it's there. 187 00:06:45,616 --> 00:06:48,225 - A lighter? - Huh. What does the note say? 188 00:06:50,311 --> 00:06:51,428 "This is a lighter." 189 00:06:52,407 --> 00:06:53,663 I don't understand. 190 00:06:54,030 --> 00:06:55,661 How much clearer could she have been? 191 00:06:55,709 --> 00:06:57,239 I wouldn't read too much into it. 192 00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:58,626 Your grandma loved you very much. 193 00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:01,420 She just did a couple of bizarre things towards the end. 194 00:07:02,018 --> 00:07:04,009 Here, Alex, I can help you out with that. 195 00:07:04,511 --> 00:07:06,543 You are getting very sleepy. 196 00:07:06,901 --> 00:07:09,621 A crappy old lighter is not a sucky gift. 197 00:07:09,622 --> 00:07:12,875 Honey, hey, hey. So you're not gonna do what your mom asked? 198 00:07:12,876 --> 00:07:14,842 Marry off my dad to a complete stranger 199 00:07:14,843 --> 00:07:16,541 on the day of her funeral? I think not. 200 00:07:16,542 --> 00:07:17,846 It was her last wish. 201 00:07:17,847 --> 00:07:20,479 When my dad is ready, he gets to pick his own girlfriend. 202 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:22,256 That's the big upside to your wife dying. 203 00:07:23,738 --> 00:07:25,553 Also, not having to think before you speak. 204 00:07:25,554 --> 00:07:26,490 Yeah. 205 00:07:27,808 --> 00:07:29,743 Your honor, it all boils down to this. 206 00:07:29,744 --> 00:07:31,994 The motel owes Miss Menchengo-- 207 00:07:31,995 --> 00:07:33,471 - Menchaca. - Damn it. Every time. 208 00:07:33,472 --> 00:07:35,688 More in wages than she ever could've taken 209 00:07:35,689 --> 00:07:37,998 in soaps and tiny shampoos. 210 00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:39,641 Fine. Case dismissed. 211 00:07:39,642 --> 00:07:40,659 Yes! 212 00:07:41,831 --> 00:07:43,501 Oh! Gracias! Muchas gracias! 213 00:07:43,502 --> 00:07:44,979 - De nada. De nada. - Muchas gracias. 214 00:07:44,982 --> 00:07:48,168 Did you see that? I won! I-I can't believe it! 215 00:07:48,169 --> 00:07:50,705 Yeah. It scares me that winning is such a surprise for you. 216 00:07:50,950 --> 00:07:54,845 Next! Matthew Plonkser. Parking violations. 217 00:07:55,005 --> 00:07:57,789 I thought I'd be a little rusty, but apparently not. 218 00:07:59,151 --> 00:08:01,463 Oh! Really? Sweet. 219 00:08:01,499 --> 00:08:03,449 Yes! Go make your mistakes with him. 220 00:08:03,450 --> 00:08:05,401 I don't want to go to jail for prostitution. 221 00:08:08,065 --> 00:08:09,649 Like you could afford me. 222 00:08:10,078 --> 00:08:11,996 It seems to me it wasn't only the meter 223 00:08:11,997 --> 00:08:14,514 that was broken that fateful afternoon. 224 00:08:14,515 --> 00:08:15,506 Nay! 225 00:08:16,132 --> 00:08:18,460 It was the entire criminal justice system. 226 00:08:18,844 --> 00:08:20,476 Therefore I submit to you, 227 00:08:21,015 --> 00:08:23,535 the only "influence" my client was under that night 228 00:08:23,575 --> 00:08:25,463 was his love of boating. 229 00:08:27,170 --> 00:08:28,529 Shame! 230 00:08:31,191 --> 00:08:33,420 I just don't get it. Why would she give me a lighter? 231 00:08:33,591 --> 00:08:35,535 Maybe she wants you to burn all your clothes. 232 00:08:36,227 --> 00:08:38,497 Is it possible we didn't have the connection I thought we did? 233 00:08:38,911 --> 00:08:40,927 I don't know. You heard dad. 234 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,029 She was on all that medication towards the end. 235 00:08:43,030 --> 00:08:45,254 People do weird things when they're on drugs. 236 00:08:45,469 --> 00:08:47,644 When Dylan was on Vicodin after his root canal, 237 00:08:47,645 --> 00:08:50,861 he bought the complete DVD set of "Dr. Quinn medicine woman." 238 00:08:54,620 --> 00:08:56,796 Get going, ladies. The pool's for residents only. 239 00:08:56,797 --> 00:08:58,429 Oh, okay. Sorry. We'll leave. 240 00:08:58,430 --> 00:09:00,433 Uh, no, we won't. There's nobody here. 241 00:09:00,434 --> 00:09:02,304 - Haley! - Why can't we use the pool? 242 00:09:02,305 --> 00:09:03,932 Because those are the rules. 243 00:09:04,094 --> 00:09:05,590 Are we gonna have a problem here? 244 00:09:05,591 --> 00:09:08,679 You don't scare me I've been in real jail. 245 00:09:08,959 --> 00:09:11,115 Oh, you two are pretty smart, aren't you? 246 00:09:11,116 --> 00:09:12,853 No. Only she is. 247 00:09:17,827 --> 00:09:18,809 North. 248 00:09:18,863 --> 00:09:19,829 Flowers. 249 00:09:19,928 --> 00:09:20,856 Red. 250 00:09:22,034 --> 00:09:23,034 One dot. 251 00:09:23,805 --> 00:09:24,773 Two bam. 252 00:09:26,523 --> 00:09:27,867 I have mahj! 253 00:09:27,893 --> 00:09:29,468 - Hee hee! - Again?! 254 00:09:29,690 --> 00:09:31,650 Wow, you're really on some streak, Edith. 255 00:09:31,808 --> 00:09:33,160 Luck of the tiles. 256 00:09:33,581 --> 00:09:35,397 Anyone else want some punch? 257 00:09:36,147 --> 00:09:37,444 Yeah. I'll join you. 258 00:09:42,100 --> 00:09:43,886 - You are very good. - Well... 259 00:09:43,887 --> 00:09:46,375 Where'd a farm boy like you learn to play mahjong? 260 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:47,710 Oh, well, one summer, 261 00:09:47,711 --> 00:09:49,411 I worked at the central Missouri b'Nai b'rith. 262 00:09:49,412 --> 00:09:51,580 It's the nation's smallest chapter. 263 00:09:52,146 --> 00:09:53,300 Listen, Marilyn, 264 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,266 I don't mean to stir things up, 265 00:09:55,267 --> 00:09:59,531 but I just saw Edith take the winning tile out of her jacket pocket. 266 00:09:59,915 --> 00:10:01,142 I knew it! 267 00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:02,363 Nobody's that good! 268 00:10:02,364 --> 00:10:03,478 Listen, I'm as shocked as you are. 269 00:10:03,479 --> 00:10:05,557 It just doesn't seem like Edith. 270 00:10:05,558 --> 00:10:08,870 Yeah, well, it goes to show, you think you know someone... 271 00:10:14,483 --> 00:10:17,795 Hey. What happened to all the cookies? 272 00:10:17,871 --> 00:10:20,175 Oh, well, you know I hate to stir things up... 273 00:10:23,609 --> 00:10:25,083 - Excuse me. - Yes? 274 00:10:25,084 --> 00:10:28,162 Jay Pritchett. Frank Dunphy's son is married to my daughter. 275 00:10:28,163 --> 00:10:29,361 Oh, I'm so sorry. 276 00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:30,826 Ah, he grows on you. 277 00:10:31,267 --> 00:10:33,159 Oh, you're talking about the death. Thank you. 278 00:10:33,452 --> 00:10:37,397 You look very familiar to me. Did you ever live in Ohio? 279 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:40,566 No. I'm from Pensacola. 280 00:10:41,235 --> 00:10:42,443 And then it hit me. 281 00:10:42,510 --> 00:10:45,391 I had done my basic training in Pensacola. 282 00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:46,944 She was my first. 283 00:10:47,209 --> 00:10:49,122 I'll never forget her-- Charlotte somebody. 284 00:10:49,136 --> 00:10:51,352 I was 18, and she was 31. 285 00:10:51,816 --> 00:10:53,978 And we fell pretty hard for each other. 286 00:10:54,307 --> 00:10:55,677 I always felt bad I never called her 287 00:10:55,678 --> 00:10:56,950 when I got back from Vietnam. 288 00:10:57,321 --> 00:10:59,890 Especially because by then I had, you know... 289 00:11:00,408 --> 00:11:01,711 learned a few things. 290 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,830 I'm sorry. You'll have to forgive me. 291 00:11:03,831 --> 00:11:05,379 My memory isn't what it used to be. 292 00:11:05,380 --> 00:11:08,485 I was in the Navy. Jay Pritchett. 293 00:11:08,849 --> 00:11:10,241 Little more up here, 294 00:11:10,406 --> 00:11:11,482 little less down here. 295 00:11:11,483 --> 00:11:13,021 I'm sure you're a very nice man, 296 00:11:13,022 --> 00:11:16,308 but I-I think you may have mistaken me for someone else. 297 00:11:16,448 --> 00:11:17,551 I was shipping off to Vietnam. 298 00:11:17,552 --> 00:11:19,446 You had the ass of a young Ann-Margret. 299 00:11:19,555 --> 00:11:20,691 Yeah, that was me. 300 00:11:21,820 --> 00:11:23,484 Grandma looks so happy here. 301 00:11:24,367 --> 00:11:25,944 Yeah. We were pretty hammered. 302 00:11:27,193 --> 00:11:30,049 That was last 4th of July-- grandma's favorite holiday. 303 00:11:30,942 --> 00:11:32,485 The Plimptons had a barbecue, 304 00:11:32,494 --> 00:11:35,146 and gram and I got a little tipsy on ginger margaritas. 305 00:11:35,147 --> 00:11:37,265 We came home for a catnap 306 00:11:37,410 --> 00:11:39,470 and slept right through the big fireworks show. 307 00:11:39,806 --> 00:11:41,213 First one she ever missed. 308 00:11:41,734 --> 00:11:42,933 Boy, was she mad. 309 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:44,240 I made it up to her 310 00:11:44,241 --> 00:11:46,366 with a little fireworks show of our own later. 311 00:11:46,367 --> 00:11:47,361 Grandpa! 312 00:11:47,546 --> 00:11:50,678 A couple of glow sticks and a slingshot in the backyard. 313 00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:55,038 Which led to some pretty memorable lovemaking. 314 00:11:56,585 --> 00:11:58,618 Not to change the subject, 315 00:11:58,789 --> 00:12:01,042 but I don't really get the gift grandma left me. 316 00:12:01,043 --> 00:12:02,835 Well, didn't she explain it in the note? 317 00:12:02,953 --> 00:12:04,800 No. The note's four words. 318 00:12:06,389 --> 00:12:07,909 You know it opens, right? 319 00:12:08,347 --> 00:12:09,283 It does? 320 00:12:09,711 --> 00:12:13,399 Sure. Look, it's Florida. Everything sticks together. 321 00:12:17,219 --> 00:12:18,388 It's all so weird. 322 00:12:19,164 --> 00:12:20,644 - Mm. - This thing you dread in the back of your mind 323 00:12:20,645 --> 00:12:22,070 suddenly becomes real. 324 00:12:22,109 --> 00:12:23,069 I know. 325 00:12:24,063 --> 00:12:25,669 I feel better having you here, though. 326 00:12:25,670 --> 00:12:27,166 Oh, I'm always here for you. 327 00:12:28,275 --> 00:12:29,387 Look at that house. 328 00:12:29,590 --> 00:12:30,789 That is a cute house. 329 00:12:30,790 --> 00:12:32,278 I wonder who lives there. 330 00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:33,723 I don't know. 331 00:12:35,059 --> 00:12:36,663 Claire, what are you doing? 332 00:12:36,664 --> 00:12:37,932 I love this house. 333 00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:39,996 I bet you anything I would love whoever lives here. 334 00:12:39,997 --> 00:12:40,617 Wait a minute. 335 00:12:40,618 --> 00:12:42,490 That lady from my mom's letter lives here, doesn't she? 336 00:12:42,491 --> 00:12:43,652 Annie Fitzsimmons. 337 00:12:43,653 --> 00:12:44,969 Phil, listen to me. 338 00:12:45,117 --> 00:12:47,296 You may have your reasons for not wanting to do this, 339 00:12:47,297 --> 00:12:49,864 but your mother was a very wise woman. 340 00:12:49,865 --> 00:12:52,233 She believed that whoever is behind that door 341 00:12:52,343 --> 00:12:54,911 would make your father happy for the rest of his life. 342 00:12:56,748 --> 00:12:58,157 Yeah. What can I do for you? 343 00:12:58,738 --> 00:12:59,906 She's perfect. 344 00:13:00,212 --> 00:13:01,735 I thought Annie Fitzsimmons lived here. 345 00:13:01,736 --> 00:13:03,856 She does. Annie, honey! 346 00:13:03,860 --> 00:13:05,444 There's people here to see ya! 347 00:13:05,929 --> 00:13:07,486 - Hi. - Hi. 348 00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:08,583 Can I help you? 349 00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:10,635 We're selling vacuum cleaners. 350 00:13:10,636 --> 00:13:12,371 Wow. That is strange. 351 00:13:12,372 --> 00:13:12,893 I know. 352 00:13:12,894 --> 00:13:15,543 Because just this morning, my vacuum cleaner broke. 353 00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:18,134 - Huh. - That's on me. I shed like a collie. 354 00:13:18,390 --> 00:13:19,258 Let's see what you got. 355 00:13:19,259 --> 00:13:20,827 Yes, Claire, let's see what you got. 356 00:13:21,316 --> 00:13:22,400 I didn't bring it. 357 00:13:22,401 --> 00:13:23,380 - You didn't bring it? - No. 358 00:13:23,381 --> 00:13:25,648 You had it when we left the vacuum cleaner office. 359 00:13:25,870 --> 00:13:28,446 I guess it's fair to say you've made a huge mistake. 360 00:13:29,518 --> 00:13:31,446 - Mm. - No. Say it. 361 00:13:31,452 --> 00:13:33,476 I'm sorry to do that. It's part of the training. 362 00:13:34,096 --> 00:13:35,961 I've made a huge mistake. 363 00:13:37,626 --> 00:13:39,387 I don't think she's gonna work out. 364 00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:47,788 - That's mahj again! - Oh! Well, shocker. 365 00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,965 - That's it. You're cheating. - I am not. 366 00:13:49,966 --> 00:13:54,046 Oh, please! You've stashed more tiles than Marilyn has cookies! 367 00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:56,258 Oh! O-okay. Uh, let's just take a breath. 368 00:13:56,259 --> 00:13:58,175 Who cares about tiles or cookies 369 00:13:58,176 --> 00:14:00,311 or whatever Hattie's slipping into her coffee? 370 00:14:00,471 --> 00:14:01,875 I knew you were drinking again! 371 00:14:01,876 --> 00:14:04,470 - That's how she lost her license. - You shut your traps! 372 00:14:04,471 --> 00:14:05,495 - Drop dead! - Screw you! 373 00:14:05,496 --> 00:14:06,429 - Yeah, you, too! - Ladies. 374 00:14:06,430 --> 00:14:07,820 - And you! - Ladies. 375 00:14:08,072 --> 00:14:09,633 - Stop it! Stop it. - You-- 376 00:14:09,634 --> 00:14:11,411 You have been friends for 20 years. 377 00:14:11,412 --> 00:14:14,141 What on earth has gotten into you all? 378 00:14:15,449 --> 00:14:18,582 Why does drama keep following me everywhere I go? 379 00:14:18,583 --> 00:14:20,805 It just keeps popping up out of nowhere. 380 00:14:21,082 --> 00:14:22,587 Like Crispin's hair plugs. 381 00:14:23,738 --> 00:14:25,666 And so we went to your apartment. 382 00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:27,509 It's still embarrassing. 383 00:14:27,510 --> 00:14:29,500 I told you I had never been with a woman. 384 00:14:30,176 --> 00:14:32,855 And you took me by the hand and you led me into the bedroom. 385 00:14:32,856 --> 00:14:34,616 You were so sweet and beautiful. 386 00:14:35,047 --> 00:14:36,558 I thought I'd gone to heaven. 387 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:40,042 - Jay Pritchett. - Yes! Yes! 388 00:14:40,043 --> 00:14:41,730 Oh! I remember that. 389 00:14:42,195 --> 00:14:43,589 You were so handsome. 390 00:14:43,743 --> 00:14:45,119 Ohh! I don't know about that. 391 00:14:45,141 --> 00:14:47,285 I mean, cute, maybe. I-- People talk about my eyes. 392 00:14:47,575 --> 00:14:51,130 But I always regretted not getting in touch with you 393 00:14:51,131 --> 00:14:52,221 when I got back, 394 00:14:52,222 --> 00:14:54,942 because you had given me something that I cherished 395 00:14:55,243 --> 00:14:56,917 for almost 50 years. 396 00:14:57,317 --> 00:14:59,189 You gave me something, too. 397 00:14:59,486 --> 00:15:00,412 I did? 398 00:15:00,413 --> 00:15:01,810 You wait right there. 399 00:15:02,744 --> 00:15:04,177 I'm down there for a funeral-- 400 00:15:04,178 --> 00:15:05,660 it's such a sad event-- 401 00:15:06,002 --> 00:15:08,970 and I end up finding something that I thought was lost forever. 402 00:15:09,073 --> 00:15:12,439 This beautiful moment that meant so much to both of us, 403 00:15:12,516 --> 00:15:14,874 set against the backdrop of fighting commies. 404 00:15:15,666 --> 00:15:16,770 There's your movie. 405 00:15:17,396 --> 00:15:20,676 I remember exactly where I was when you gave it to me. 406 00:15:21,445 --> 00:15:22,953 You said, "wear this bec--" 407 00:15:22,954 --> 00:15:24,466 No, no. This isn't mine. 408 00:15:24,792 --> 00:15:26,407 And I never went to Jefferson High. 409 00:15:26,661 --> 00:15:28,837 Oh. My mistake. 410 00:15:29,576 --> 00:15:30,784 Ah! Here it is. 411 00:15:31,525 --> 00:15:33,908 - You said, "pin this--" - No, no. N-no. Never got a medal. 412 00:15:34,691 --> 00:15:35,559 And, uh... 413 00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:38,108 this is the wrong branch of service. 414 00:15:38,582 --> 00:15:39,510 Of course. 415 00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:41,573 These are th-- 416 00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:42,674 Never wrote. 417 00:15:44,838 --> 00:15:46,397 Why don't you look through here? 418 00:15:47,208 --> 00:15:50,520 Turns out she sent more men off to war than Lyndon Johnson. 419 00:15:52,257 --> 00:15:52,892 Well, we're here. 420 00:15:52,893 --> 00:15:54,674 You wanna try to sell my dad a vacuum? 421 00:15:54,675 --> 00:15:55,794 Tease me all you want. 422 00:15:55,795 --> 00:15:57,371 I am glad that we at least tried. 423 00:15:57,372 --> 00:15:59,875 I know you mean well, but he's gonna be fine on his own. 424 00:16:00,201 --> 00:16:01,432 So funny. 425 00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,142 Ooh! Here. Try mine, Frank. 426 00:16:04,143 --> 00:16:05,598 - Oh! I bet it's delicious. - Mmm. 427 00:16:05,599 --> 00:16:07,075 If your taste buds are dead. 428 00:16:07,076 --> 00:16:08,553 Dead? Real sensitive, Myra. 429 00:16:08,554 --> 00:16:10,996 The woman's not even cold... unlike your eggplant parm. 430 00:16:10,997 --> 00:16:12,524 What is going on? 431 00:16:12,561 --> 00:16:14,868 Oh, it's a feeding frenzy. They're all over him. 432 00:16:14,869 --> 00:16:16,663 They're practically measuring the windows for new drapes. 433 00:16:16,664 --> 00:16:17,686 It's disgusting. 434 00:16:17,687 --> 00:16:19,705 I must get this recipe, Myra. 435 00:16:19,706 --> 00:16:20,512 Oh, sure. 436 00:16:20,513 --> 00:16:22,827 You want the recipe? It's thaw, heat, and serve. 437 00:16:22,828 --> 00:16:25,853 My mom was right. They're gonna eat him alive. 438 00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:26,772 Do you think we can break up 439 00:16:26,773 --> 00:16:28,574 - Annie Fitzsimmons and her boyfriend? - Boyfriend? 440 00:16:28,575 --> 00:16:31,817 Oh, you mean Marv? Oh, that's hilarious. Oh! 441 00:16:32,217 --> 00:16:34,321 Marv's her brother, visiting from Pompano. 442 00:16:34,322 --> 00:16:35,165 He's here for the week, 443 00:16:35,166 --> 00:16:37,150 slept with half the women in this place. 444 00:16:37,211 --> 00:16:38,907 She's single? This is fantastic. 445 00:16:38,908 --> 00:16:40,111 Cam, how do you know that? 446 00:16:40,112 --> 00:16:41,952 This place is lousy with gossips. 447 00:16:43,558 --> 00:16:45,428 Next. Gloria Delgado? 448 00:16:45,429 --> 00:16:46,350 I'm here! 449 00:16:46,356 --> 00:16:49,799 Conspiring to promote prostitution. How do you plead? 450 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,613 - Not guilty, your honor. - Oh, good. It's you. 451 00:16:52,614 --> 00:16:55,609 Your majesty. I didn't do anything wrong. 452 00:16:55,610 --> 00:16:57,503 But I will say that I am guilty 453 00:16:57,504 --> 00:16:59,839 if I can just pay the fine and go home. 454 00:16:59,879 --> 00:17:00,972 No, you won't. 455 00:17:00,973 --> 00:17:02,631 You're innocent, and I can prove it. 456 00:17:02,632 --> 00:17:04,949 Your honor, this document here shows 457 00:17:04,950 --> 00:17:07,785 that my client was a resident of California at the time. 458 00:17:07,786 --> 00:17:09,529 And these canceled checks prove 459 00:17:09,530 --> 00:17:12,186 that she was legally subletting the apartment in question. 460 00:17:12,689 --> 00:17:15,314 I might be a simple man, but I do know one thing... 461 00:17:15,792 --> 00:17:17,200 If a dog don't bark-- 462 00:17:17,201 --> 00:17:19,052 Okay, I can't listen to him anymore. 463 00:17:19,053 --> 00:17:21,848 Case dismissed. Court adjourned. 464 00:17:22,314 --> 00:17:24,762 - Oh! - Ah! Gracias, Mitchell! You're wonderful! 465 00:17:25,714 --> 00:17:29,042 You know what? We got lucky because I had no ending to that dog thing. 466 00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:31,041 If you don't have anything to do next week, 467 00:17:31,042 --> 00:17:33,720 maybe you can go with me to Texas. 468 00:17:35,659 --> 00:17:36,395 Hello again. 469 00:17:36,396 --> 00:17:38,332 Oh, no. You're alone. 470 00:17:38,477 --> 00:17:40,369 Did you fire that nice girl? 471 00:17:40,370 --> 00:17:42,918 No. She's not a nice girl. She's my wife. 472 00:17:42,919 --> 00:17:44,436 And we don't sell vacuums. 473 00:17:44,437 --> 00:17:46,230 Thank God. You'd starve. 474 00:17:47,673 --> 00:17:49,522 U-um, I-I-I'm actually Phil Dunphy. 475 00:17:49,523 --> 00:17:51,493 I-I'm Frank and Grace Dunphy's son. 476 00:17:51,494 --> 00:17:54,360 Oh, I heard about your mom. I'm--I'm so sorry. 477 00:17:54,361 --> 00:17:55,234 Thank you. 478 00:17:55,235 --> 00:17:57,068 I only met her a few times, 479 00:17:57,069 --> 00:17:59,373 but she seemed like a lovely woman. 480 00:18:00,659 --> 00:18:02,619 Mm, but I'm still confused. 481 00:18:02,676 --> 00:18:04,964 Well, this probably won't help, but, um... 482 00:18:07,508 --> 00:18:12,132 Her last request was for me to fix you up with my dad. 483 00:18:12,754 --> 00:18:13,929 Oh, my. 484 00:18:13,995 --> 00:18:16,699 Yeah. I really wish I sold vacuums. 485 00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:18,023 So earlier... 486 00:18:18,371 --> 00:18:20,295 We were thrown when your brother answered the door. 487 00:18:20,296 --> 00:18:22,000 We thought he was your boyfriend. 488 00:18:22,513 --> 00:18:24,288 I don't know what to say. 489 00:18:24,323 --> 00:18:27,484 Really? This is such a-a normal request I'm making. 490 00:18:27,704 --> 00:18:30,105 Please, by the way, don't feel pressured at all. 491 00:18:30,325 --> 00:18:32,093 My dad doesn't even know about this. 492 00:18:32,341 --> 00:18:35,310 I-I just--I had to tell you. It's what she wanted. 493 00:18:35,613 --> 00:18:37,573 She was always doing crazy stuff like this... 494 00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:40,737 Going out of her way to take care of us. 495 00:18:42,391 --> 00:18:44,895 I coughed on the phone once, and she overnighted me soup. 496 00:18:45,713 --> 00:18:48,174 When I wanted to learn how to ski, she knit me a sweater. 497 00:18:49,797 --> 00:18:51,276 When I wanted to be a marine biologist, 498 00:18:51,277 --> 00:18:53,293 she knit me a sweater with a whale on it. 499 00:18:56,056 --> 00:18:57,143 Who does that? 500 00:18:59,188 --> 00:19:00,956 That's just the kind of person she is. 501 00:19:01,430 --> 00:19:02,390 Was. 502 00:19:02,756 --> 00:19:04,004 Oh, sweetie. 503 00:19:05,995 --> 00:19:07,690 You're a good son. 504 00:19:09,492 --> 00:19:11,772 She was right. You are very nice. 505 00:19:23,608 --> 00:19:24,675 It's a beautiful service. 506 00:19:24,676 --> 00:19:27,180 It really makes you think about how you wanna live your life. 507 00:19:28,216 --> 00:19:30,333 I wanna quit my job and get back into the courtroom. 508 00:19:30,334 --> 00:19:31,269 What? 509 00:19:31,431 --> 00:19:33,121 Yeah. Just--just don't say anything to anyone. 510 00:19:33,122 --> 00:19:34,530 Well, who am I gonna tell? 511 00:19:36,531 --> 00:19:37,723 Thank you, Mel. 512 00:19:38,281 --> 00:19:39,313 That was beautiful. 513 00:19:42,837 --> 00:19:44,423 Um, before we say good night, 514 00:19:44,424 --> 00:19:47,239 my daughter Alex would like to pay tribute. 515 00:19:50,494 --> 00:19:51,598 Thanks, sweetie. 516 00:19:58,548 --> 00:20:01,292 My grandmother and I had a very special bond. 517 00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:02,869 Seriously? Again? 518 00:20:03,056 --> 00:20:04,896 This may not make sense to everyone, 519 00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:07,304 but I'm pretty sure she would've loved it. 520 00:20:19,391 --> 00:20:20,462 "This is a lighter. 521 00:20:21,551 --> 00:20:24,167 "It belonged to my favorite actor, Paul Newman. 522 00:20:24,524 --> 00:20:26,931 "One day, he came into the restaurant where I was waitressing 523 00:20:26,932 --> 00:20:28,593 "and accidentally left it behind. 524 00:20:29,153 --> 00:20:30,735 "For the first time in my life, 525 00:20:31,131 --> 00:20:32,722 "I did something I wasn't supposed to 526 00:20:32,723 --> 00:20:34,347 and slipped it into my pocket." 527 00:20:35,303 --> 00:20:36,725 "One of the customers saw 528 00:20:36,726 --> 00:20:39,205 "and said, 'don't worry. Your secret's safe with me. 529 00:20:39,778 --> 00:20:42,266 "That customer turned out to be the love of my life, 530 00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:43,857 "your grandfather. 531 00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:46,788 "So, my Alex, who I love so dearly, 532 00:20:46,789 --> 00:20:49,148 "who is probably too much like me for her own good, 533 00:20:49,997 --> 00:20:51,275 "every once in a while, 534 00:20:51,276 --> 00:20:53,125 "don't be afraid to break the rules. 535 00:20:54,149 --> 00:20:55,371 You never know what can happen." 536 00:21:00,691 --> 00:21:01,797 How 'bout this weather? 537 00:21:02,415 --> 00:21:04,855 Yep. They say it's supposed to rain. 538 00:21:05,095 --> 00:21:06,046 We need it. 539 00:21:06,260 --> 00:21:07,170 Muriel. 540 00:21:07,730 --> 00:21:10,193 Hey! Are you two packed up and ready to go? 541 00:21:10,194 --> 00:21:11,226 Yep. 542 00:21:12,415 --> 00:21:13,534 Where does the time go? 543 00:21:13,889 --> 00:21:15,090 Darned if I know. 544 00:21:15,490 --> 00:21:17,322 Everyone's always in such a hurry. 545 00:21:17,502 --> 00:21:19,904 And why? We're all gonna end up in the same place. 546 00:21:21,669 --> 00:21:23,349 Well, I guess we better mosey.