1
00:00:02,246 --> 00:00:04,746
And, as we make our way
out of the gourmet kitchen,

2
00:00:04,746 --> 00:00:07,646
we find ourselves back in
the warm embrace of the parlor.

3
00:00:07,646 --> 00:00:09,246
Easy ***. It's just
one room, not *** Park.

4
00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:11,812
Where'd you get
all this sweet furniture?

5
00:00:11,813 --> 00:00:14,145
Oh, we rented it to make the house
feel more comfortable and inviting.

6
00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:15,925
Don't sit there!
Oh, my gosh.

7
00:00:15,926 --> 00:00:18,598
It took me 20 minutes
to get these chops just right.

8
00:00:18,916 --> 00:00:19,990
There.
Does that look straight?

9
00:00:19,991 --> 00:00:21,662
Nothing about that looks straight.

10
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:24,091
I love the house. 
It's beautiful.

11
00:00:24,092 --> 00:00:25,255
Here is a tree.

12
00:00:25,256 --> 00:00:26,247
It's a pachira,

13
00:00:26,248 --> 00:00:28,685
a Taiwanese symbol
of good financial fortune.

14
00:00:28,874 --> 00:00:30,010
It's also known as a money tree.

15
00:00:30,011 --> 00:00:31,240
That makes two of us.

16
00:00:31,241 --> 00:00:33,607
Well, I would like
to propose a toast.

17
00:00:35,534 --> 00:00:36,574
Mm. Missed me.

18
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:39,055
To the hard work
of Claire and Cameron--

19
00:00:39,056 --> 00:00:41,106
or as I like to call them,
"Clameron"... oh!

20
00:00:41,107 --> 00:00:43,108
Which is what potential
home buyers will be doing

21
00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:44,629
when they see this place.

22
00:00:44,630 --> 00:00:45,830
Clamorin'.

23
00:00:47,596 --> 00:00:50,213
- Clamoring t-to buy it f--
- Phil, don't go back for it.

24
00:00:50,622 --> 00:00:53,622
Because this house
is going to sell.

25
00:00:53,771 --> 00:00:55,470
Who's the best realtor in town?

26
00:00:55,471 --> 00:00:56,643
- Gil Thorpe.
- That's right,

27
00:00:56,644 --> 00:00:58,632
- and he has buyers coming over tomorrow.
- That's right.

28
00:00:58,633 --> 00:01:00,073
Wow! All right.

29
00:01:00,074 --> 00:01:02,333
To Claire and Cam.

30
00:01:02,334 --> 00:01:04,407
My sister. My partner.

31
00:01:04,549 --> 00:01:06,498
My sister! My partner!
My sister! My partner!

32
00:01:06,499 --> 00:01:08,526
- "Chinatown." Hilarious.
- Still empty.

33
00:01:08,527 --> 00:01:09,543
Okay, you know you're my ride.

34
00:01:09,544 --> 00:01:11,255
- To Clameron!
- Here, here.

35
00:01:11,256 --> 00:01:12,325
- Cheers.
- Speech!

36
00:01:12,326 --> 00:01:14,497
Oh! Well, gosh,
I wasn't prepared for this.

37
00:01:14,498 --> 00:01:15,531
I...I think we should just
really thank the people--

38
00:01:15,532 --> 00:01:17,814
- Here's to the best construction crew
in the business. - Okay. Okay.

39
00:01:17,815 --> 00:01:20,070
Hank. Luis. Paco!

40
00:01:20,523 --> 00:01:22,154
Wish you could be here
right now, buddy.

41
00:01:22,155 --> 00:01:22,889
What? Did he die?

42
00:01:22,890 --> 00:01:24,135
No, he's on the roof,
fixing a shingle

43
00:01:24,136 --> 00:01:25,718
that he should've
gotten right the first time.

44
00:01:25,719 --> 00:01:27,944
- I guess the most important people--
- And then to my partner. - Yes.

45
00:01:27,945 --> 00:01:29,586
My lifelong companion.

46
00:01:29,897 --> 00:01:30,929
- My lovah.
- Aw.

47
00:01:31,209 --> 00:01:32,239
- Mm.
- Okay, Cam. - Oh.

48
00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,080
Who had his doubts about
this project the whole time,

49
00:01:35,081 --> 00:01:37,687
and never, even
in my darkest moment,

50
00:01:37,688 --> 00:01:38,949
- said "I told you so."
- Oh.

51
00:01:38,950 --> 00:01:40,525
Which is good because
he would've been wrong.

52
00:01:40,683 --> 00:01:42,052
- Very gracious.
- Okay.

53
00:01:42,053 --> 00:01:44,411
And I'm sure that the house
is gonna sell in no time.

54
00:01:44,412 --> 00:01:45,400
Hey!

55
00:01:45,401 --> 00:01:47,236
- Hear, hear.
- Yeah!

56
00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:49,418
Hey, I've got a friend
who wants to buy a house.

57
00:01:49,419 --> 00:01:51,315
Maybe I can show it
to him after school.

58
00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:53,425
Then if he buys it,
I'd get the commission.

59
00:01:53,426 --> 00:01:54,191
What would that be?

60
00:01:54,192 --> 00:01:55,419
- Adorable.
- Oh!

61
00:01:55,420 --> 00:01:57,465
I'm serious.
And I'm not adorable.

62
00:01:57,466 --> 00:01:58,882
I'm getting a mustache.

63
00:02:01,370 --> 00:02:03,198
I know my A-B-C's.

64
00:02:03,199 --> 00:02:05,397
Wow. I guess things weren't
about you for a second.

65
00:02:05,398 --> 00:02:07,297
- Okay, wrapping this up.
- Yeah.

66
00:02:07,298 --> 00:02:09,352
To the fastest sale
in real estate history.

67
00:02:09,353 --> 00:02:11,030
- Yes!
- Bravo!

68
00:02:11,031 --> 00:02:13,279
Seriously, it's bad luck
to toast with an empty glass.

69
00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:25,860
Synced by YYeTs, corrected by gloriabg
www.addic7ed.com

70
00:02:26,402 --> 00:02:27,754
Dunphy, I'm not gonna lie to you.

71
00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:30,538
You guys did a nice job on the house.
My buyer wants in.

72
00:02:30,539 --> 00:02:33,243
Fantastic!
That is great news!

73
00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:34,790
You know,
when we first got into this--

74
00:02:34,791 --> 00:02:36,280
Whoa, the small talk's over.

75
00:02:36,318 --> 00:02:37,584
Here's what
we're prepared to offer.

76
00:02:37,585 --> 00:02:38,626
You're joking, right?

77
00:02:38,627 --> 00:02:40,051
I don't joke about real estate.

78
00:02:40,663 --> 00:02:43,439
I joke about golf and Mexicans.

79
00:02:43,610 --> 00:02:45,140
It's okay, though.
I'm married to one.

80
00:02:45,141 --> 00:02:46,251
W-we're not gonna take this.

81
00:02:46,252 --> 00:02:47,233
It's the first day on the market.

82
00:02:47,234 --> 00:02:49,271
- We'd barely break even.
- Take it.

83
00:02:49,929 --> 00:02:50,617
No.

84
00:02:50,618 --> 00:02:52,492
- The market's crashing!
- Nuh-unh.

85
00:02:52,493 --> 00:02:53,535
You're in over your head.

86
00:02:53,536 --> 00:02:54,625
Maybe you're in over your head.

87
00:02:54,626 --> 00:02:55,866
Dunphy, listen to me.

88
00:02:56,063 --> 00:02:58,398
If you pass up on this,
you're gonna regret it.

89
00:02:58,399 --> 00:03:01,606
I don't know the meaning
of the word "regret."

90
00:03:01,607 --> 00:03:04,055
Here we go.
French toast, double bacon.

91
00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:05,586
Egg whites, dry toast.

92
00:03:05,587 --> 00:03:06,555
Damn it.

93
00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:08,870
Let me tell you something, Gil.

94
00:03:08,871 --> 00:03:10,264
You may be top dog,

95
00:03:10,265 --> 00:03:12,016
but you're the one
who's gonna have regrets,

96
00:03:12,084 --> 00:03:14,702
'cause this house
is gonna sell like... that.

97
00:03:18,457 --> 00:03:19,360
Well...

98
00:03:21,073 --> 00:03:22,616
that's it for today.

99
00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:24,739
We're going to die in this house.

100
00:03:24,740 --> 00:03:26,504
Oh, the pillows
have lost their fluff.

101
00:03:26,505 --> 00:03:29,033
The pillows are not the problem!

102
00:03:33,438 --> 00:03:35,437
It's okay, Manny.
I'll see you in a minute.

103
00:03:35,438 --> 00:03:38,870
Yes, I'll be polite and
I'll be nice. I promise.

104
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,677
I'm going to kill him.

105
00:03:40,678 --> 00:03:41,859
What'd Javier do this time?

106
00:03:41,860 --> 00:03:43,846
His one big weekend
alone with his son,

107
00:03:43,847 --> 00:03:45,082
and I just found out

108
00:03:45,083 --> 00:03:47,578
that he brought
his latest bimbo along.

109
00:03:47,579 --> 00:03:49,076
He always does this.

110
00:03:49,077 --> 00:03:52,107
You remember that time that he took
Manny and that stripper fishing?

111
00:03:52,108 --> 00:03:53,610
Yeah. They barely got a nipple.

112
00:03:54,612 --> 00:03:56,438
Come on. That was good.
I just thought of that.

113
00:03:56,439 --> 00:03:57,176
Are you done?

114
00:03:57,177 --> 00:03:59,048
I bet she was comfortable
with the pole.

115
00:03:59,984 --> 00:04:01,323
Ah. Should've quit after "nipple."

116
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,071
How does Leno
do it night after night?

117
00:04:03,072 --> 00:04:05,241
I was just wondering
that about myself.

118
00:04:07,727 --> 00:04:09,943
Phil, please. Tell us that
you have some good news.

119
00:04:09,944 --> 00:04:12,183
Well, it's complicated because
I don't have good news,

120
00:04:12,184 --> 00:04:13,871
but I really want you
guys to like me.

121
00:04:13,872 --> 00:04:16,237
What? Gil Thorpe called back
with another offer,

122
00:04:16,238 --> 00:04:18,291
but it was $10,000 lower
than the last one.

123
00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:19,187
Lower?

124
00:04:19,188 --> 00:04:21,079
Oh, that is perfect.
That's just perfect.

125
00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:22,784
Something you wanna say, Mitchell?

126
00:04:23,382 --> 00:04:26,165
Yes. I told you so.
I warned you this would happen.

127
00:04:26,166 --> 00:04:28,173
I tried to stop it,
but you wouldn't let me.

128
00:04:28,174 --> 00:04:29,698
I was right,
and you were wrong.

129
00:04:29,699 --> 00:04:32,989
Uh, you live in this ridiculous
candy-colored fantasy land.

130
00:04:32,990 --> 00:04:34,611
I am so much smarter than you,

131
00:04:34,612 --> 00:04:36,845
and it is killing me
not to rub your nose in it!

132
00:04:36,846 --> 00:04:38,220
No. I'm just thinking.

133
00:04:38,221 --> 00:04:39,649
Okay, guys,
we have to do something.

134
00:04:39,650 --> 00:04:41,699
We can't carry this house
for much longer.

135
00:04:41,754 --> 00:04:43,546
Cam, what did you
spend on staging?

136
00:04:43,711 --> 00:04:45,065
Uh, let's see.
I don't know.

137
00:04:45,066 --> 00:04:46,395
How can you not know?!

138
00:04:46,396 --> 00:04:49,663
Because I was hungry,
and everything was so pretty.

139
00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:50,849
And I didn't think
it would matter

140
00:04:50,850 --> 00:04:51,820
because who could've guessed

141
00:04:51,821 --> 00:04:53,870
we wouldn't have sold
the house by now?

142
00:04:54,222 --> 00:04:55,142
Me.

143
00:04:55,315 --> 00:04:56,869
Phil, do you think you can

144
00:04:56,870 --> 00:04:58,555
get Gil Thorpe
up to his original offer?

145
00:04:58,556 --> 00:04:59,767
- How?
- I don't know.

146
00:04:59,768 --> 00:05:02,141
You could, uh, flatter him,
stroke his ego.

147
00:05:02,142 --> 00:05:04,534
No, he'd never fall for that.
He's too smart.

148
00:05:04,826 --> 00:05:07,713
Ohh. But, honey, if anybody
can pull it off, you can.

149
00:05:08,198 --> 00:05:10,092
You're so good at everything.

150
00:05:10,489 --> 00:05:11,441
Mm. That is true.

151
00:05:11,442 --> 00:05:12,395
- I'll do it.
- Mm.

152
00:05:15,096 --> 00:05:16,320
We're back!

153
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:21,420
I cannot believe that again
you brought a girl.

154
00:05:21,421 --> 00:05:23,923
What is it this time?
A cocktail waitress?

155
00:05:23,924 --> 00:05:26,194
A boat show model? A stripper?

156
00:05:26,248 --> 00:05:29,784
No, then I could make
real money. I'm just a PhD.

157
00:05:29,785 --> 00:05:31,185
Mom, this is Trish.

158
00:05:31,315 --> 00:05:33,211
- Gloria, hi.
- Hi.

159
00:05:33,212 --> 00:05:33,988
- Jay.
- How do you do?

160
00:05:33,989 --> 00:05:36,008
I have heard so much about you.

161
00:05:36,009 --> 00:05:37,581
She works at the museum of art.

162
00:05:37,582 --> 00:05:39,988
It was so cool.
We got an after hours tour,

163
00:05:39,989 --> 00:05:42,586
and Trish said I could take
flash pictures of the paintings.

164
00:05:42,587 --> 00:05:43,597
But don't worry. I didn't.

165
00:05:43,598 --> 00:05:44,208
That's a relief.

166
00:05:44,209 --> 00:05:45,758
I was afraid I was gonna
have to look at 'em.

167
00:05:45,759 --> 00:05:47,447
So you work at the museum?

168
00:05:47,561 --> 00:05:48,865
Oh, no. I'm just on the board.

169
00:05:48,866 --> 00:05:51,454
I run the art and antiquities
department at Christie's.

170
00:05:51,575 --> 00:05:52,203
Oh.

171
00:05:52,204 --> 00:05:54,228
Let me see. What is the word
I am looking for?

172
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:55,937
Oh, yes. Bam!

173
00:05:56,694 --> 00:05:58,301
So how did you two meet?

174
00:05:58,302 --> 00:06:00,639
I won a car in a poker game,
but it caught on fire,

175
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:02,197
so the guy gave me a painting.

176
00:06:02,198 --> 00:06:03,567
I took it to the auction house,

177
00:06:03,568 --> 00:06:05,276
eh, ticky ticky,
I made a big profit

178
00:06:05,277 --> 00:06:08,053
but I still came home
with a masterpiece.

179
00:06:08,403 --> 00:06:09,546
He means her.

180
00:06:10,022 --> 00:06:13,255
May I tell you,
you have a wonderful boy?

181
00:06:13,328 --> 00:06:15,660
So well-mannered and chivalrous.

182
00:06:15,661 --> 00:06:17,347
It's like he leapt off the canvas

183
00:06:17,348 --> 00:06:20,492
of a 16th century portrait
by Gainsborough or van Dyke.

184
00:06:21,140 --> 00:06:22,928
Listen to that brain.
Hmm?

185
00:06:22,929 --> 00:06:23,949
Can they stay for dinner?

186
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,725
Well, that's up to them, papi.

187
00:06:25,726 --> 00:06:27,441
How can I turn down a free meal?

188
00:06:27,442 --> 00:06:28,632
First time's the hardest.

189
00:06:28,633 --> 00:06:29,849
What do you say, my love?

190
00:06:29,850 --> 00:06:33,097
Well, I'm not sure I'm ready
to say good-bye to this guy yet.

191
00:06:33,098 --> 00:06:35,514
But I'll only stay
if you let me contribute.

192
00:06:35,515 --> 00:06:39,286
I did bring along a fabulous
bottle of '82 Bordeaux

193
00:06:39,287 --> 00:06:40,610
that we didn't get
to this weekend.

194
00:06:40,611 --> 00:06:42,169
For that, you can take Manny home.

195
00:06:42,170 --> 00:06:43,750
See what I have to put up with?

196
00:06:45,185 --> 00:06:46,089
Gil!

197
00:06:46,229 --> 00:06:48,662
- Phil Dunphy.
- Ha ha ha!

198
00:06:48,727 --> 00:06:50,543
I knew you'd come slinking back!

199
00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:51,382
Hey, guys!

200
00:06:51,383 --> 00:06:54,008
It's Dunphy. He's cavin'.
What did I tell you?

201
00:06:54,009 --> 00:06:55,305
What did I tell you, hey?

202
00:06:56,715 --> 00:07:00,070
Oh, Dunphy,
I can play you like a ukulele,

203
00:07:00,071 --> 00:07:02,156
'cause you're small and dainty.

204
00:07:02,157 --> 00:07:04,391
Gil, I wanna talk to you
about your offer.

205
00:07:04,392 --> 00:07:05,872
Oh, ho!
Let me stop you right there.

206
00:07:05,963 --> 00:07:07,292
This is how this is gonna go down.

207
00:07:07,951 --> 00:07:10,159
First of all, I'm gonna take you
out to a very nice dinner.

208
00:07:10,794 --> 00:07:12,634
I'm gonna talk
really sweet to you.

209
00:07:12,848 --> 00:07:15,379
And then I'm gonna lay
you down by the fire...

210
00:07:15,380 --> 00:07:16,860
- Oh.
- Slow at first, then...

211
00:07:16,861 --> 00:07:18,274
If you guys are talking
about the house,

212
00:07:18,275 --> 00:07:19,598
my friend Zack's still looking.

213
00:07:19,599 --> 00:07:21,869
Honey, 14-year-olds
can't afford to buy houses.

214
00:07:21,870 --> 00:07:23,126
He's not 14.

215
00:07:23,133 --> 00:07:25,685
He's a software guy
who volunteers at my school.

216
00:07:25,987 --> 00:07:28,091
- We're gonna be sweating...
- He's an adult with money?

217
00:07:28,095 --> 00:07:29,836
He drives a nicer car than you.

218
00:07:29,837 --> 00:07:30,922
Get me his number right now!

219
00:07:30,923 --> 00:07:31,676
And then you're gonna go home

220
00:07:31,677 --> 00:07:33,325
and tell everybody
you went to the movies,

221
00:07:33,518 --> 00:07:36,288
but you and I both know
that you got thorpedoed.

222
00:07:36,826 --> 00:07:38,579
Guess what, Gil.
This was a courtesy call

223
00:07:38,580 --> 00:07:40,335
to tell you that
I have another buyer.

224
00:07:40,678 --> 00:07:43,440
So you can tell your buyer
that you cost them a get house...

225
00:07:43,441 --> 00:07:46,754
Because you got cocky
and overplayed your hand.

226
00:07:46,835 --> 00:07:51,036
Prepare to Phil
the agony of dun-feat.

227
00:07:51,755 --> 00:07:53,426
Both names!

228
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:02,556
Now I'm not an art expert like you,

229
00:08:02,557 --> 00:08:04,611
but I did acquire
this piece in a gallery

230
00:08:04,612 --> 00:08:06,741
in one of the finer Vegas casinos.

231
00:08:06,742 --> 00:08:07,877
What do you think?

232
00:08:08,551 --> 00:08:10,105
It does say something.

233
00:08:10,106 --> 00:08:12,170
He used to, before
his little voice box broke.

234
00:08:12,171 --> 00:08:15,259
It said, "welcome home,
master. Ruff day?"

235
00:08:16,777 --> 00:08:17,679
Again?

236
00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:19,780
Would you believe she made
me keep this in the attic?

237
00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:21,957
Gloria, Trish says this is art.

238
00:08:21,958 --> 00:08:23,653
What was it Thoreau said?

239
00:08:23,877 --> 00:08:26,195
"It's not what you look at that matters.
It's what you see."

240
00:08:26,196 --> 00:08:27,101
Hear that?

241
00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:28,156
You were wrong.

242
00:08:28,157 --> 00:08:29,679
Keep talking like that,

243
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,823
and you will find out
how he lost his voice box.

244
00:08:32,979 --> 00:08:35,426
- What have we here?
- His name's Barkley.

245
00:08:36,157 --> 00:08:37,050
That's delightful.

246
00:08:37,051 --> 00:08:39,360
It's not delightful.
It's disgusting.

247
00:08:39,361 --> 00:08:41,684
Uh, look at Warhol. Look at Koons.

248
00:08:41,685 --> 00:08:43,528
A lot of great works
of contemporary art

249
00:08:43,529 --> 00:08:45,750
were initially dismissed as garbage.

250
00:08:45,751 --> 00:08:46,999
Excellent point, Trish.

251
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,557
This is not even garbage.

252
00:08:48,558 --> 00:08:51,344
They wouldn't take it.
It's too big for the can.

253
00:08:51,345 --> 00:08:54,252
Now what I see
is a man who is not man.

254
00:08:54,253 --> 00:08:56,599
He is a servant who
has lost his dignity.

255
00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:59,277
It is a commentary
on the class system in society--

256
00:08:59,278 --> 00:09:02,712
as well as a handy place
to put your keys and sunglasses.

257
00:09:02,713 --> 00:09:05,932
Whatever he is, your barkley
is going back to the attic.

258
00:09:05,933 --> 00:09:07,309
I'm going to see the baby.

259
00:09:08,335 --> 00:09:09,358
Ohh. Barkley.

260
00:09:09,359 --> 00:09:10,199
Very clever.

261
00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,528
Come on, guys. Let's play.

262
00:09:11,687 --> 00:09:12,786
What are you going to play?

263
00:09:12,787 --> 00:09:15,334
Charades. Me and Trish
against dad and Jay.

264
00:09:15,335 --> 00:09:17,677
I have to warn you, Jay.
These two are very good.

265
00:09:17,678 --> 00:09:19,373
It's like they have
their own language.

266
00:09:19,374 --> 00:09:20,815
I want to play, too.

267
00:09:21,157 --> 00:09:22,395
Which team should I join?

268
00:09:22,396 --> 00:09:23,314
- Go with Manny.
- Go with Jay.

269
00:09:23,315 --> 00:09:24,179
- Them.
- His team.

270
00:09:25,812 --> 00:09:27,880
Okay, then.
Great.

271
00:09:28,116 --> 00:09:29,396
Well, we'll see you tonight.

272
00:09:30,081 --> 00:09:31,729
Well, Zack Barbie
is indeed an adult,

273
00:09:31,730 --> 00:09:33,583
he likes the neighborhood,
and he's interested.

274
00:09:33,584 --> 00:09:34,600
Oh, thank God.

275
00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:37,475
Really? Did God come in here
and tell you about him?

276
00:09:37,476 --> 00:09:39,253
Because I don't
remember it that way.

277
00:09:39,254 --> 00:09:40,792
Okay, okay, this is it, people.

278
00:09:40,793 --> 00:09:42,466
We cannot afford
to lose this buyer.

279
00:09:42,467 --> 00:09:43,500
Why am I standing?

280
00:09:43,501 --> 00:09:46,139
Phil, do you think this is
the right house for him?

281
00:09:46,140 --> 00:09:47,773
It's hard to tell.
He's young. He's single.

282
00:09:47,774 --> 00:09:49,398
I don't know anything
else about him.

283
00:09:49,559 --> 00:09:51,590
Zack Barbie. Born 1986.

284
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,242
Went to college at a place called "mit."

285
00:09:53,243 --> 00:09:53,864
M.I.T.

286
00:09:53,865 --> 00:09:55,265
I know how to spell it.

287
00:09:56,411 --> 00:09:57,358
Five words.

288
00:09:57,359 --> 00:09:58,567
It's a book.

289
00:09:59,361 --> 00:10:00,753
There's an old man...

290
00:10:01,018 --> 00:10:02,514
On the boat...

291
00:10:02,847 --> 00:10:04,117
He caught a big fish.

292
00:10:04,118 --> 00:10:05,829
The old man and the fish!

293
00:10:05,830 --> 00:10:06,547
Uh, time!

294
00:10:06,548 --> 00:10:07,974
"The old man and the sea"!

295
00:10:07,975 --> 00:10:09,211
Never heard about it.

296
00:10:09,212 --> 00:10:11,609
Hemingway's classic tale
of man versus nature.

297
00:10:11,610 --> 00:10:12,724
Leave it to a guy
with a hundred cats

298
00:10:12,725 --> 00:10:14,128
to write a good fish story, right?

299
00:10:14,129 --> 00:10:15,407
Oh, ho, Trish!

300
00:10:15,993 --> 00:10:18,845
What is this, a book club
or a fun game?

301
00:10:18,846 --> 00:10:19,758
Go.

302
00:10:25,854 --> 00:10:26,782
Play.

303
00:10:26,977 --> 00:10:28,047
Five words.

304
00:10:28,048 --> 00:10:30,086
Second word. Scared. Afraid.

305
00:10:30,087 --> 00:10:31,552
- "Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf?"
- Got it!

306
00:10:31,553 --> 00:10:32,542
- You're amazing!
- Oh!

307
00:10:32,622 --> 00:10:34,781
Wowie!
You could do this for a living.

308
00:10:34,782 --> 00:10:35,792
Really? There's such a thing?

309
00:10:35,793 --> 00:10:37,290
No, just like there's no such thing

310
00:10:37,291 --> 00:10:39,370
as a professional
Broadway enthusiast.

311
00:10:39,371 --> 00:10:40,733
You're gonna have
to get a real job.

312
00:10:40,734 --> 00:10:42,054
Okay, it's my turn.

313
00:10:45,873 --> 00:10:47,017
I don't know this.

314
00:10:49,661 --> 00:10:50,685
I don't know this.

315
00:10:50,686 --> 00:10:52,346
Mom, you have to do
the one you pick.

316
00:10:52,347 --> 00:10:53,440
Oh, no, Manny. It's fine.

317
00:10:53,441 --> 00:10:54,651
Just keep picking until
you get one you like.

318
00:10:54,652 --> 00:10:57,772
No, no. I don't have to keep picking.
I'm gonna do this one.

319
00:11:01,372 --> 00:11:02,094
- Uh-oh.
- No, I got this.

320
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:03,851
Is it a play, a book, or a movie?

321
00:11:03,852 --> 00:11:05,267
Yeah, one of those.

322
00:11:06,260 --> 00:11:07,453
"Lost"! "Clueless"!

323
00:11:07,454 --> 00:11:08,499
"Dazed and confused"!

324
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:09,566
This is stupid.

325
00:11:09,572 --> 00:11:11,068
Nobody can get this.

326
00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,075
You're probably right.

327
00:11:13,684 --> 00:11:16,026
Yeah. See? This is one of mine.
It's really hard.

328
00:11:16,027 --> 00:11:17,925
Really? What is it?
You do it.

329
00:11:17,926 --> 00:11:18,991
Well...

330
00:11:19,606 --> 00:11:20,542
Play.

331
00:11:21,802 --> 00:11:22,722
"Sweeney Todd"!

332
00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:23,899
- Exactly.
- Ah!

333
00:11:23,921 --> 00:11:24,945
What a team.

334
00:11:26,008 --> 00:11:28,624
This is a stupid... game!

335
00:11:31,302 --> 00:11:33,245
Okay, so after a quick scan
of his Facebook, Twitter,

336
00:11:33,246 --> 00:11:34,643
Tumblr, Pinterest, and Instagram,

337
00:11:34,644 --> 00:11:35,871
here is what I know.

338
00:11:35,872 --> 00:11:37,248
Privacy is dead?

339
00:11:38,074 --> 00:11:40,610
Likes-- Chicago Blackhawks,
kickboxing,

340
00:11:40,611 --> 00:11:42,117
the movie "Die hard," and beer.

341
00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:44,528
- He sounds like a frat boy.
- Oh, he's many things.

342
00:11:44,529 --> 00:11:46,335
He meditates,
he loves Indian food,

343
00:11:46,336 --> 00:11:48,328
and he's crazy about his dog Otis.

344
00:11:48,329 --> 00:11:49,458
Does the house
have a doggie door?

345
00:11:49,459 --> 00:11:50,219
- No.
- No.

346
00:11:50,220 --> 00:11:52,168
Put one in.
You get to Barbie through Otis.

347
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:53,908
She's like the girl
with the dragon tattoo.

348
00:11:53,909 --> 00:11:54,716
With cuter hair.

349
00:11:54,717 --> 00:11:56,527
- Stop talking!
- Oh, she really is.

350
00:11:56,528 --> 00:11:58,480
Dude has a thing
for chicks in black tights,

351
00:11:58,481 --> 00:11:59,766
he likes old school funk,

352
00:11:59,767 --> 00:12:01,935
and he chipped his front
tooth playing soccer.

353
00:12:01,995 --> 00:12:03,393
Aw! It's actually kind of cute.

354
00:12:03,394 --> 00:12:04,948
Oh, my God.
You're falling in love with him.

355
00:12:04,949 --> 00:12:06,761
Oh, please.
It's just a job, nothing more.

356
00:12:06,762 --> 00:12:08,751
Okay, that's enough
to go on. Let's move.

357
00:12:08,752 --> 00:12:09,269
We've got two hours

358
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,081
to turn that place into
Zack Barbie's dream house.

359
00:12:11,082 --> 00:12:12,817
- Barbie's dream house.
- We don't have time!

360
00:12:18,220 --> 00:12:20,156
What the hell was all that about?

361
00:12:20,796 --> 00:12:23,048
Why don't you ask Trish?
She knows everything.

362
00:12:23,049 --> 00:12:24,641
Well, at least she's not a bimbo.

363
00:12:24,878 --> 00:12:26,973
She and Manny
seem to hit it off fine.

364
00:12:27,127 --> 00:12:28,407
What's the problem?

365
00:12:28,408 --> 00:12:31,798
Just one weekend,
and he already idolizes her.

366
00:12:31,831 --> 00:12:34,897
And why wouldn't he?
She's so much smarter than me.

367
00:12:34,898 --> 00:12:37,931
She knows so much more about
the things that he loves.

368
00:12:37,932 --> 00:12:40,412
They have their
little inside jokes.

369
00:12:41,083 --> 00:12:42,878
If she learns how
to froth his cappuccino,

370
00:12:42,879 --> 00:12:43,894
I am history.

371
00:12:43,895 --> 00:12:46,607
You and Manny have the closest
relationship I've ever seen.

372
00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:47,711
Hell, he may never form

373
00:12:47,712 --> 00:12:50,088
a healthy attachment
with another woman after you.

374
00:12:50,096 --> 00:12:51,671
You're just saying that.

375
00:12:51,672 --> 00:12:53,324
And it doesn't matter
if Manny likes her.

376
00:12:53,325 --> 00:12:54,626
Knowing Javier's track record,

377
00:12:54,627 --> 00:12:56,545
he'll dump her like
he dumps everybody.

378
00:12:56,546 --> 00:12:59,179
You are wrong, Jay.
I'm not going to dump her.

379
00:12:59,411 --> 00:13:01,946
In fact, this weekend,
I asked Trish to marry me.

380
00:13:04,943 --> 00:13:06,450
You're going to marry her?

381
00:13:06,451 --> 00:13:08,557
I was waiting for
the right time to tell you.

382
00:13:08,558 --> 00:13:09,149
Nailed it.

383
00:13:09,150 --> 00:13:11,796
I wanted to ask you
for my abuela's ring back.

384
00:13:11,797 --> 00:13:12,901
I really want Trish to wear it.

385
00:13:12,902 --> 00:13:15,753
She is the most amazing
woman I've ever known.

386
00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:17,706
You see that I am holding a knife.

387
00:13:17,707 --> 00:13:20,216
Please. Half our marriage
was you with a knife.

388
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:22,674
Trish is the one.
And Manny already loves her.

389
00:13:22,675 --> 00:13:24,052
He can spend more time
with us now--

390
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:25,582
Holidays, summers even.

391
00:13:25,583 --> 00:13:27,534
Fine. I'll go get you the ring.

392
00:13:27,535 --> 00:13:28,965
But you owe me $8

393
00:13:28,966 --> 00:13:31,189
because I had
to replace "the emerald."

394
00:13:44,830 --> 00:13:46,864
Javier, you've brought a lot
of 30-year-olds around here,

395
00:13:46,865 --> 00:13:48,489
but this one's my favorite.

396
00:13:48,490 --> 00:13:50,009
And I like Trish, too.

397
00:13:50,397 --> 00:13:51,134
Me, too.

398
00:13:51,135 --> 00:13:52,401
Well, then I suppose this is

399
00:13:52,402 --> 00:13:55,130
as good a moment
as any to tell you, Manny.

400
00:13:55,527 --> 00:13:57,243
Trish and I are getting married.

401
00:13:57,244 --> 00:13:59,828
Oh, my gosh.
This is the best news ever!

402
00:14:01,293 --> 00:14:02,645
Here. Drink.

403
00:14:02,814 --> 00:14:04,182
Now listen, my love.

404
00:14:05,081 --> 00:14:07,513
This belonged to my abuela.

405
00:14:07,774 --> 00:14:09,336
Um, maybe not now, Javier.

406
00:14:09,337 --> 00:14:10,528
No, no. Please. Please.

407
00:14:10,529 --> 00:14:12,856
It will fill my heart to see
this ring on your...

408
00:14:13,777 --> 00:14:14,817
your finger.

409
00:14:15,282 --> 00:14:17,250
Oh. It's-- it's a little small.

410
00:14:18,064 --> 00:14:18,787
I can't do this.

411
00:14:18,788 --> 00:14:20,488
No, no.
I'll just push a little harder.

412
00:14:20,489 --> 00:14:23,266
Javier, stop.
It'll never work.

413
00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:24,991
But wait, my love.

414
00:14:25,191 --> 00:14:26,990
We can put butter on your finger.

415
00:14:29,882 --> 00:14:31,090
That's him. Hit it.

416
00:14:35,127 --> 00:14:36,514
Hey! Not him.

417
00:14:36,803 --> 00:14:38,481
Hey, guys.
Sorry it took me so long.

418
00:14:38,482 --> 00:14:40,838
I've never bought beer before.
There's just so many choices.

419
00:14:40,839 --> 00:14:42,062
Do we really need that much?

420
00:14:42,063 --> 00:14:43,719
I don't know.
Is this a lot?

421
00:14:44,980 --> 00:14:46,292
Showtime!

422
00:14:47,895 --> 00:14:49,367
Hey! Not him.

423
00:14:49,564 --> 00:14:52,612
Hey! Thought I'd just swing by
and see how it's going.

424
00:14:52,613 --> 00:14:53,741
Zack here?

425
00:14:53,772 --> 00:14:54,796
Oh, my God.

426
00:14:55,033 --> 00:14:56,992
You are wearing black tights.

427
00:14:56,993 --> 00:14:58,841
Alex was right.
You are into him.

428
00:14:58,842 --> 00:15:01,062
That skank Zoey broke his heart.
I can make him whole again!

429
00:15:01,063 --> 00:15:02,111
Haley.

430
00:15:03,054 --> 00:15:04,324
Okay, that has to be him.

431
00:15:04,325 --> 00:15:05,679
Everyone we know is already here.

432
00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:08,609
- Everyone, places. Let's make this perfect.
- Yes.

433
00:15:09,056 --> 00:15:09,976
I'm Ira Glass.

434
00:15:09,977 --> 00:15:10,962
- Today on the program...
- No, no.

435
00:15:10,963 --> 00:15:12,007
- That's not it.
- Turn that off!

436
00:15:12,008 --> 00:15:13,599
- No, no, no, no, no!
- Turn it off!

437
00:15:13,932 --> 00:15:14,879
It's the back button.

438
00:15:15,556 --> 00:15:17,360
Hey! You must be Zack.

439
00:15:17,361 --> 00:15:18,848
- Yeah.
- I'm Phil Dunphy. Come on in.

440
00:15:18,849 --> 00:15:20,129
- Hi.
- Yeah.

441
00:15:20,166 --> 00:15:21,306
These are my associates.

442
00:15:21,307 --> 00:15:22,692
- Hello!
- Good evening. - Hi!

443
00:15:22,693 --> 00:15:23,694
- Hello.
- Hi!

444
00:15:23,695 --> 00:15:25,631
Oh, and my, uh, my daughter.

445
00:15:25,918 --> 00:15:28,558
So... this is the place.

446
00:15:28,618 --> 00:15:29,514
Looks nice.

447
00:15:29,515 --> 00:15:30,923
So, Zack, you hungry?

448
00:15:30,924 --> 00:15:33,220
Uh, no.
But, uh, it smells great.

449
00:15:33,221 --> 00:15:36,375
Yeah, it's from this amazing
Indian place just down the road.

450
00:15:36,376 --> 00:15:37,640
It's walking distance.

451
00:15:37,641 --> 00:15:39,879
Which is awesome if you've had
one too many brewskis,

452
00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:41,008
am I right?

453
00:15:41,032 --> 00:15:42,048
Yeah.

454
00:15:43,695 --> 00:15:46,893
Oh. Is someone a Blackhawks fan?
Love the hawks.

455
00:15:47,008 --> 00:15:49,272
Yeah, well,
that's a weird coincidence.

456
00:15:49,597 --> 00:15:51,081
Let's go check out
the kickboxing gym.

457
00:15:51,082 --> 00:15:52,861
Seriously? I kickbox.

458
00:15:52,862 --> 00:15:53,817
- What?!
- Yeah.

459
00:15:53,818 --> 00:15:54,803
Come on!

460
00:15:57,115 --> 00:15:58,059
Haley!

461
00:16:00,241 --> 00:16:01,800
Trish, open up!

462
00:16:01,801 --> 00:16:03,602
No. I don't want
to see you right now.

463
00:16:03,603 --> 00:16:05,623
Open up, or I'm going
to break down the door!

464
00:16:05,624 --> 00:16:08,200
Hey! Hey, hey, hey!
Don't break down the door!

465
00:16:08,233 --> 00:16:08,857
Ay, caramba.

466
00:16:08,858 --> 00:16:10,706
I'm beginning to think
I should've just bought a ring.

467
00:16:10,707 --> 00:16:12,236
- Let me talk to her.
- You?

468
00:16:12,744 --> 00:16:15,276
Yes. She's scared.
Maybe I can help.

469
00:16:15,277 --> 00:16:17,509
Help her go... adios.

470
00:16:17,701 --> 00:16:18,514
Go ahead.

471
00:16:18,515 --> 00:16:20,663
And you tell her
she's being crazy and irrational.

472
00:16:20,664 --> 00:16:23,220
And if she doesn't come out,
I'm going to burn down this house!

473
00:16:23,221 --> 00:16:25,117
Don't burn down the house!

474
00:16:25,807 --> 00:16:28,159
Trish, open! It's Gloria.

475
00:16:30,107 --> 00:16:32,474
I'm sorry. I needed to be alone.

476
00:16:32,501 --> 00:16:33,972
In Manny's bedroom?

477
00:16:34,239 --> 00:16:36,794
Well... I thought
it was a bathroom.

478
00:16:36,795 --> 00:16:38,428
It smells like potpourri.

479
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:39,756
Mm. Listen,

480
00:16:39,757 --> 00:16:42,213
I would be the first person
to understand that

481
00:16:42,214 --> 00:16:45,012
you're having second thoughts
about marrying Javier.

482
00:16:45,302 --> 00:16:46,279
I am,

483
00:16:46,426 --> 00:16:48,099
but I do love him.

484
00:16:48,100 --> 00:16:49,260
Of course you do,

485
00:16:49,261 --> 00:16:52,869
even though he's irresponsible
and impulsive,

486
00:16:52,870 --> 00:16:54,692
and if your sisters
are even a little bit pretty,

487
00:16:54,693 --> 00:16:56,805
- he's gonna try--
- No, no, no, no, no. It's not that.

488
00:16:56,870 --> 00:16:58,245
Is it the drinking?

489
00:16:59,191 --> 00:17:00,527
Is it the gambling?

490
00:17:01,176 --> 00:17:02,855
Is it because of your fat fingers?

491
00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:04,596
- No, it's you.
- Me?

492
00:17:04,597 --> 00:17:06,205
How can I compete with you?

493
00:17:06,206 --> 00:17:07,508
All Manny talks about

494
00:17:07,509 --> 00:17:09,836
is how he's got
the world's greatest mom.

495
00:17:09,837 --> 00:17:11,923
And I know Javier
regrets losing you.

496
00:17:11,924 --> 00:17:13,053
No, he doesn't.

497
00:17:13,054 --> 00:17:14,918
Oh, believe me, he does.

498
00:17:15,087 --> 00:17:17,643
And who could blame him?
I mean...

499
00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:19,322
Look at you!

500
00:17:19,373 --> 00:17:21,461
Who has a body like that?!

501
00:17:21,682 --> 00:17:24,145
And you just had a baby
two months ago?

502
00:17:24,146 --> 00:17:26,641
I mean, what--
do you just live at the gym?

503
00:17:26,642 --> 00:17:28,697
Who has time for the gym?

504
00:17:30,232 --> 00:17:31,737
You know what I had for lunch?!

505
00:17:31,738 --> 00:17:33,318
I had a half a granola bar,

506
00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:36,205
and I can't button my pants!

507
00:17:36,206 --> 00:17:37,943
I can't cook!

508
00:17:38,148 --> 00:17:41,492
And at best,
I am average in bed!

509
00:17:41,610 --> 00:17:42,672
And I will never,

510
00:17:42,673 --> 00:17:47,490
ever, ever live up
to the great Gloria!

511
00:17:48,825 --> 00:17:50,905
Welcome to the family!

512
00:17:54,353 --> 00:17:56,605
And did I mention that
from the back of the garden,

513
00:17:56,606 --> 00:17:58,494
you can almost see
a piece of the building

514
00:17:58,495 --> 00:18:00,238
that they shot "Die hard" in?

515
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:02,662
I like to sit back there sometimes.

516
00:18:02,663 --> 00:18:05,575
It's a great place to gather
my thoughts and just...

517
00:18:05,731 --> 00:18:06,942
I don't know. Be in the now.

518
00:18:06,943 --> 00:18:08,319
I meditate every day.

519
00:18:08,375 --> 00:18:09,681
- Yippee-ki-yay!
- Yeah.

520
00:18:09,682 --> 00:18:11,298
What are the odds?

521
00:18:11,973 --> 00:18:13,542
You know, this is probably
not gonna help

522
00:18:13,543 --> 00:18:15,247
my negotiating power, but...

523
00:18:15,515 --> 00:18:17,627
I kinda can't believe
how perfect this house is.

524
00:18:17,979 --> 00:18:22,067
And how much is little Otis
gonna enjoy this doggie door?

525
00:18:23,193 --> 00:18:25,346
How do you...
know my dog's name?

526
00:18:25,581 --> 00:18:26,198
I don't.

527
00:18:26,199 --> 00:18:28,239
Yeah, you do.
You just said "Otis."

528
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:29,899
No. No, no, he said,

529
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:33,108
"oh, dis doggie door would be
perfect for your dog..."

530
00:18:33,997 --> 00:18:35,342
Should you own one.

531
00:18:35,582 --> 00:18:37,743
- That's not even close to what
he just said. - That's what I heard.

532
00:18:37,757 --> 00:18:39,228
Anyway, we can
do a very fast escrow

533
00:18:39,229 --> 00:18:41,283
and get you in this house
by the end of the month.

534
00:18:41,284 --> 00:18:43,941
Oh! Just in time for your birthday!

535
00:18:44,137 --> 00:18:45,201
- Ohh.
- This is weird!

536
00:18:45,271 --> 00:18:46,180
It's totally weird.

537
00:18:46,181 --> 00:18:48,684
Okay, the Blackhawks,
you know my birthday,

538
00:18:48,892 --> 00:18:50,362
and you know my dog's name.

539
00:18:50,363 --> 00:18:52,582
- You guys are freaking me out.
- Okay, wait a second.

540
00:18:52,583 --> 00:18:54,453
We poured our hearts
into this house,

541
00:18:54,454 --> 00:18:56,828
and we just wanted to show you
what it would be like

542
00:18:56,829 --> 00:19:00,933
if you were living here.
Did we go a tiny bit overboard?

543
00:19:04,220 --> 00:19:05,172
Oh, my God.

544
00:19:06,427 --> 00:19:07,411
Mm! Favorite song.

545
00:19:07,573 --> 00:19:08,845
- Way to go.
- Ha. You take care.

546
00:19:10,075 --> 00:19:12,075
Can you even see
the "Die hard" building from here?

547
00:19:12,076 --> 00:19:13,066
- No.
- Mnh-mnh.

548
00:19:14,615 --> 00:19:16,313
I'll be at Coachella, too!
I'll come find you!

549
00:19:16,314 --> 00:19:17,803
- Honey! Haley!
- Haley!

550
00:19:19,309 --> 00:19:20,589
Well, that's it.

551
00:19:21,143 --> 00:19:22,623
We're officially screwed.

552
00:19:22,669 --> 00:19:23,431
Darn it.

553
00:19:23,432 --> 00:19:24,540
It's okay, honey.

554
00:19:24,541 --> 00:19:27,397
No, it's not okay.
I feel responsible.

555
00:19:27,638 --> 00:19:29,806
I dragged us all into this.

556
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:33,948
The whole point was so that
I could make a little extra money

557
00:19:33,949 --> 00:19:35,276
and contribute to the family,

558
00:19:35,277 --> 00:19:37,933
and instead,
I'm gonna end up costing us.

559
00:19:38,571 --> 00:19:39,471
I'm a failure.

560
00:19:39,472 --> 00:19:41,055
Hey. Hey.

561
00:19:41,685 --> 00:19:43,485
No one could've predicted this.

562
00:19:44,603 --> 00:19:45,477
My bad.

563
00:19:45,478 --> 00:19:46,434
We'll find another buyer.

564
00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:49,252
- This time, we'll learn from our mistakes.
- Got it. I got it.

565
00:19:49,724 --> 00:19:50,796
He's back!

566
00:19:51,395 --> 00:19:54,029
No. No, no, no!
Stop! Stop. Stop.

567
00:19:54,116 --> 00:19:56,580
This is a great house.
It was built with integrity.

568
00:19:56,605 --> 00:19:59,107
We should sell it that way, okay?
No more tricks.

569
00:19:59,108 --> 00:20:00,744
- Yeah.
- Let's just be honest.

570
00:20:00,745 --> 00:20:01,689
No tricks.

571
00:20:03,188 --> 00:20:04,732
- Hey, Dunphy.
- Gil.

572
00:20:05,467 --> 00:20:06,644
Your office said
you'd be over here.

573
00:20:06,645 --> 00:20:07,757
Yeah, I am here.

574
00:20:07,908 --> 00:20:09,084
With my buyers.

575
00:20:10,544 --> 00:20:11,274
What do you guys think?

576
00:20:11,275 --> 00:20:13,261
Oh, my God!
This house is perfect.

577
00:20:13,262 --> 00:20:16,734
I especially love the warm
embrace of the parlor!

578
00:20:16,735 --> 00:20:18,931
- It screams you.
- No, it screams you, sweetie.

579
00:20:18,932 --> 00:20:20,858
- Oh, dis doggie door, Cam. Look.
- Ooh!

580
00:20:20,859 --> 00:20:22,954
Damn it. Gays.

581
00:20:23,619 --> 00:20:24,763
They come to play.

582
00:20:25,368 --> 00:20:26,575
I'm busy, Gil.

583
00:20:26,596 --> 00:20:29,580
Don't accept any offers
without talking to me first.

584
00:20:29,581 --> 00:20:31,161
My buyer wants in, all right?

585
00:20:31,162 --> 00:20:33,390
I don't know.
We're pretty far down that road.

586
00:20:33,391 --> 00:20:35,313
All right. We'll up the offer.

587
00:20:35,314 --> 00:20:36,250
Gil...

588
00:20:37,025 --> 00:20:38,856
Let me tell you how
this is gonna go down.

589
00:20:39,704 --> 00:20:42,504
First, you're gonna
buy me a lovely dinner.

590
00:20:42,525 --> 00:20:43,678
No, that's not it.

591
00:20:43,740 --> 00:20:46,581
First, I'm gonna buy you
a lovely dinner.

592
00:20:46,931 --> 00:20:48,843
Then I'm gonna
take you in the back...

593
00:20:48,844 --> 00:20:50,845
It's gonna happen!
It's gonna happen!

594
00:20:50,930 --> 00:20:52,417
We're gonna sell the house.

595
00:20:53,271 --> 00:20:55,974
You see, Mitchell?
I told you so.

596
00:20:56,146 --> 00:20:57,122
Yeah!

597
00:21:07,396 --> 00:21:08,785
That's my wife. I better take it.

598
00:21:08,786 --> 00:21:10,667
Hey, hey. Whoa, listen.
Whatever you do,

599
00:21:10,668 --> 00:21:12,513
don't tell her you're
playing golf on a weekday.

600
00:21:12,514 --> 00:21:14,050
You'll be doing dishes all night.

601
00:21:14,051 --> 00:21:16,051
Good call.
Thank you, my man.

602
00:21:16,459 --> 00:21:17,700
Hey, honey. What's up?

603
00:21:18,625 --> 00:21:20,217
Oh, not much.

604
00:21:20,218 --> 00:21:21,733
Just, uh, in a meeting.

605
00:21:22,653 --> 00:21:24,477
You know, working hard,
bringing home the bacon.

606
00:21:25,259 --> 00:21:26,667
No, he's not! He's playing golf!

607
00:21:26,668 --> 00:21:27,579
No.

608
00:21:27,743 --> 00:21:29,672
Um... fore! Nice putt!

609
00:21:30,329 --> 00:21:32,221
Why you lying to your wife, Dunphy?
Huh?

610
00:21:32,933 --> 00:21:34,549
Hey, he had a beer at lunch, too!

611
00:21:34,550 --> 00:21:35,768
What is wrong with you?

612
00:21:36,342 --> 00:21:37,797
You just got thorpedoed!

613
00:21:37,798 --> 00:21:38,886
Come back here.

614
00:21:39,086 --> 00:21:40,286
Synced by YYeTs, corrected by gloriabg
www.addic7ed.com