1 00:00:02,578 --> 00:00:04,586 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:20,246 --> 00:00:22,670 Louise, your breakfast is getting cold. 3 00:00:22,839 --> 00:00:23,838 It's just cereal. 4 00:00:23,858 --> 00:00:25,006 It's supposed to be cold. 5 00:00:25,026 --> 00:00:26,025 Or have I been doing it wrong? 6 00:00:26,176 --> 00:00:27,918 I was gonna make cheesy eggs 7 00:00:28,011 --> 00:00:29,086 for everybody this morning, 8 00:00:29,104 --> 00:00:30,845 but someone ate the entire 9 00:00:30,939 --> 00:00:32,089 brand-new block of cheddar. 10 00:00:32,107 --> 00:00:33,515 It was sharp cheddar, 11 00:00:33,609 --> 00:00:35,701 which is the best-dressed of all the cheddars. 12 00:00:35,928 --> 00:00:37,519 -That's true. -(yawns) 13 00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:39,596 Morning, Louise. You seem tired. 14 00:00:39,615 --> 00:00:41,948 Why you so sleepy, honey? Did you have a bad dream 15 00:00:42,101 --> 00:00:44,101 where your father goes crazy and kills the whole family? 16 00:00:44,194 --> 00:00:45,693 -What? -No, nothing cool like that. 17 00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:48,380 It's just tomorrow is my last show-and-tell ever. 18 00:00:48,532 --> 00:00:50,607 -Ever. -Oh, right, it stops after fourth grade. 19 00:00:50,626 --> 00:00:52,700 But then in fifth grade you get social studies, 20 00:00:52,795 --> 00:00:54,369 -so that's cool. -Anyway, 21 00:00:54,463 --> 00:00:56,296 I'm kind of the rock star of show-and-tell. 22 00:00:56,448 --> 00:00:58,223 It's my thing, it's what I'm known for. 23 00:00:58,450 --> 00:00:59,966 -Everyone agrees. -That and your dainty feet. 24 00:01:00,119 --> 00:01:01,209 -Thank you. -Mm-hmm. 25 00:01:01,287 --> 00:01:02,877 I've always knocked it out of the park, 26 00:01:02,897 --> 00:01:04,121 and this is my last one, 27 00:01:04,123 --> 00:01:05,305 I really have to bring it. 28 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,215 So I was up all night trying to figure out 29 00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:09,126 what to do for my last hurrah 30 00:01:09,144 --> 00:01:10,736 and I came up with nothing! 31 00:01:10,963 --> 00:01:13,297 Well, why don't you bring one of your fun Japanese toys? 32 00:01:13,465 --> 00:01:15,074 That octopus-looking one, maybe? 33 00:01:15,301 --> 00:01:16,483 He's got a story to tell, I bet. 34 00:01:16,635 --> 00:01:18,151 Or at least a funny thing that happened to him 35 00:01:18,320 --> 00:01:19,486 in the checkout line at the grocery store? 36 00:01:19,638 --> 00:01:22,081 Oh, Tina, Tina, Tina. You really don't get it. 37 00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:23,398 I've set a very high bar. 38 00:01:23,492 --> 00:01:25,475 My completely mechanical replacement arm 39 00:01:25,494 --> 00:01:28,236 has ten times the strength of a normal arm. 40 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:30,130 This is a drawing of my pet monkey, Bjorn. 41 00:01:30,316 --> 00:01:31,498 Couple things about Bjorn-- 42 00:01:31,575 --> 00:01:32,332 he can do the Macarena, 43 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,167 he is an ordained minister... 44 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,095 This is a tooth from the shark that tried to eat me, 45 00:01:36,322 --> 00:01:38,097 and I kickboxed my way out of its mouth. 46 00:01:38,248 --> 00:01:39,172 We're actually good friends now. 47 00:01:39,249 --> 00:01:41,082 It's made with human remains 48 00:01:41,102 --> 00:01:42,542 from the crematorium next door. 49 00:01:42,603 --> 00:01:44,436 Louise, I think maybe some of your show-and-tells 50 00:01:44,663 --> 00:01:48,089 weren't exactly honest. Because they were lies. 51 00:01:48,183 --> 00:01:50,000 For your last one, maybe you do something real. 52 00:01:50,002 --> 00:01:52,427 What? No. Real life is boring. 53 00:01:52,521 --> 00:01:55,096 Just look at Dad over there, reading the newspaper. 54 00:01:55,116 --> 00:01:56,356 -Boring. -Hey. 55 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,375 You think people want to hear about that life? 56 00:01:58,377 --> 00:02:00,268 This actually isn't boring, Louise. 57 00:02:00,287 --> 00:02:01,361 I'm reading about that old 58 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,104 artillery battery near the wharf. 59 00:02:03,198 --> 00:02:04,514 It says some cannonballs washed ashore. 60 00:02:04,533 --> 00:02:06,774 Speaking of cannonballs washing ashore, 61 00:02:06,794 --> 00:02:07,868 I got to go to the bathroom. 62 00:02:08,020 --> 00:02:09,277 Thank you for that, Gene. 63 00:02:09,296 --> 00:02:10,629 There was an artillery battery around here? 64 00:02:10,780 --> 00:02:13,023 And what kind of batteries do artilleries take? 65 00:02:13,041 --> 00:02:14,133 Double-A? It's always double-A. 66 00:02:14,284 --> 00:02:16,543 A battery is a bunch of cannons, I think. 67 00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:20,046 They used them in the War of 1812 against 68 00:02:20,199 --> 00:02:21,306 the bad guys? 69 00:02:21,533 --> 00:02:23,142 You know the spot, there's a cannon there. 70 00:02:23,369 --> 00:02:24,643 Or a statue of a cannon. 71 00:02:24,794 --> 00:02:26,979 We maybe let you play on it when you were little, 72 00:02:27,130 --> 00:02:29,039 which I assume was okay. 73 00:02:29,057 --> 00:02:30,632 Our town should get playgrounds. 74 00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:32,800 So, yeah, after that big storm last month, 75 00:02:32,895 --> 00:02:35,136 these old cannonballs washed up on the beach near the battery, 76 00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:36,396 which is pretty cool. 77 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,381 Oh, that storm. 78 00:02:37,399 --> 00:02:38,973 I had to reset all the clocks. 79 00:02:39,067 --> 00:02:40,384 And I didn't check what time it was, 80 00:02:40,402 --> 00:02:41,326 so don't use the clocks 81 00:02:41,553 --> 00:02:42,903 if you need to know what time it is. 82 00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,329 Yes, that's it! 83 00:02:44,556 --> 00:02:46,072 I'm gonna go look for a cannonball. 84 00:02:46,167 --> 00:02:48,167 That's a real thing, right, Tina? 85 00:02:48,318 --> 00:02:49,409 Uh, wait. what? 86 00:02:49,561 --> 00:02:51,486 No one is gonna go look for a cannonball. 87 00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:53,413 I don't want any of my babies getting exploded. 88 00:02:53,565 --> 00:02:56,491 Well, the cannonballs themselves don't explode, Lin. 89 00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:59,678 They're just a ball of iron. The gunpowder was in the cannon. 90 00:02:59,905 --> 00:03:01,513 Unless that's their evil plan. 91 00:03:01,665 --> 00:03:04,683 To blow us up a hundred and something years after the war? 92 00:03:04,910 --> 00:03:06,018 I don't know. 93 00:03:06,245 --> 00:03:07,577 Eh, it was a false alarm. 94 00:03:07,671 --> 00:03:09,429 But still give it a few minutes in there. 95 00:03:09,581 --> 00:03:11,081 Lot of smoke but no fire. What'd I miss? 96 00:03:11,099 --> 00:03:13,841 I'm gonna look for cannonballs on the beach after breakfast. 97 00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:15,027 -Who's in? -Sounds fun, 98 00:03:15,178 --> 00:03:16,436 but I don't think I should go anywhere. 99 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,513 I'd feel better if I could lose this cheddar. 100 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,106 Tina, what about you? You coming? 101 00:03:20,201 --> 00:03:21,441 I mean, I'll go to the beach with you 102 00:03:21,518 --> 00:03:22,534 because that sounds nice, 103 00:03:22,778 --> 00:03:24,203 but I don't think we'll find any cannonballs. 104 00:03:24,430 --> 00:03:25,520 We may find a pleasant breeze, though. 105 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,522 Aw, a sister cannonball run. 106 00:03:27,616 --> 00:03:29,783 You know, when I was a kid, we found a box of bullets 107 00:03:29,935 --> 00:03:31,192 in the woods and threw 'em at each other. 108 00:03:31,212 --> 00:03:32,360 But don't do that. And, hey, 109 00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:33,712 stay on the beach, you two. 110 00:03:33,863 --> 00:03:35,105 No going on slippery rocks 111 00:03:35,123 --> 00:03:36,122 where the waves can knock you in. 112 00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:37,624 And there's some caves near there. 113 00:03:37,776 --> 00:03:38,700 Don't go in those. 114 00:03:38,794 --> 00:03:40,201 Because of drowning. 115 00:03:40,221 --> 00:03:42,946 And if we see a volcano, should we jump in that or no? 116 00:03:42,965 --> 00:03:44,223 No. No volcanos. 117 00:03:44,374 --> 00:03:46,450 They seem fun but they're not. 118 00:03:46,468 --> 00:03:49,210 So, Bob, you know how Kathleen likes to watch hurling? 119 00:03:49,304 --> 00:03:51,212 -Uh, no. -Well, she does. A lot. 120 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:52,898 She likes watching people vomit? 121 00:03:53,049 --> 00:03:54,791 -Hurling is a sport, Gene. -Sports? 122 00:03:54,884 --> 00:03:56,293 Ugh, I'd rather watch people vomit. 123 00:03:56,462 --> 00:03:57,477 It's like hockey but on grass. 124 00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:59,554 And they have a ball instead of a puck 125 00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:02,799 and then you can pick up the ball, I think. 126 00:04:02,818 --> 00:04:04,910 It's a little confusing. But, uh, I love it. 127 00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:06,411 Sounds like you do. 128 00:04:06,563 --> 00:04:07,988 Uh, yeah, anyway, the bar where 129 00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:09,397 she usually watches it is closing. 130 00:04:09,475 --> 00:04:10,991 The owner's moving back to Ireland, 131 00:04:11,085 --> 00:04:12,567 -to start an American bar. -Okay. 132 00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:15,921 So, I kind of invited her here to watch the game today. 133 00:04:16,148 --> 00:04:17,905 But is it even on regular TV? 134 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,666 No, uh, but I have a computer 135 00:04:19,835 --> 00:04:21,318 and a little projector in my truck. 136 00:04:21,336 --> 00:04:23,487 And I can rig it all up. Doesn't that sound fun? 137 00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:24,488 I guess. 138 00:04:24,581 --> 00:04:26,506 Aw, Teddy, look at you rigging up 139 00:04:26,658 --> 00:04:28,433 sports stuff for your special friend. 140 00:04:28,585 --> 00:04:30,176 Some hurlin' and girlin'. But she's a woman. 141 00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:32,012 Yeah, well, Kathleen likes hurling, 142 00:04:32,164 --> 00:04:33,497 so I'm gonna like hurling. Because 143 00:04:33,515 --> 00:04:35,590 it's good to have, you know, shared hobbies. 144 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,609 My ex-wife Denise and I had nothing in common. 145 00:04:37,761 --> 00:04:39,686 Her favorite thing was going on trips by herself 146 00:04:39,838 --> 00:04:41,947 and not telling me when or where she was going, 147 00:04:42,098 --> 00:04:43,431 and mine was just sitting at home, 148 00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,008 rocking back and forth a little, 149 00:04:45,177 --> 00:04:46,267 and saying, "We're still in love." 150 00:04:46,361 --> 00:04:48,011 (chuckles) Over and over. 151 00:04:48,180 --> 00:04:49,604 -Aw, Teddy. -Look at you two. 152 00:04:49,698 --> 00:04:52,607 You share some hobbies. You both like burgers and fries. 153 00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:55,294 Hurling could be me and Kathleen's "burgers and fries." 154 00:04:55,445 --> 00:04:57,111 I mean, not a hobby, but... 155 00:04:57,205 --> 00:04:59,372 -Anyway, great. We're doing it. -Yes! 156 00:04:59,525 --> 00:05:01,207 It's happening! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 157 00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:03,135 Thank you, Gene. That's very supportive. 158 00:05:03,244 --> 00:05:05,045 Uh, Teddy, I think he's talking about 159 00:05:05,121 --> 00:05:06,196 -going to the bathroom. -Oh. 160 00:05:06,214 --> 00:05:08,048 Wait. Nope, not happening. 161 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,457 Dang it. What's wrong with me? 162 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:12,052 This is where I shine. This is who I am! 163 00:05:12,204 --> 00:05:13,961 Aw, my poor blocked-up baby. 164 00:05:14,056 --> 00:05:15,296 I'm gonna beat this. They're gonna make 165 00:05:15,316 --> 00:05:16,982 an independent movie about it someday. 166 00:05:17,133 --> 00:05:19,300 LOUISE: Well, that's the cannon up there. 167 00:05:19,394 --> 00:05:20,802 We're definitely looking in the right place. 168 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,062 Where are the cannonballs? 169 00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:23,304 I mean, people probably found them all? 170 00:05:23,398 --> 00:05:24,489 Oh, look, there's something. 171 00:05:24,566 --> 00:05:27,067 Oh. No, just part of a dead crab. 172 00:05:27,219 --> 00:05:28,810 But it's kind of cool. 173 00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:29,828 Could work for show-and-tell? 174 00:05:29,979 --> 00:05:31,071 Aah! The legs moved. 175 00:05:31,165 --> 00:05:33,314 You're gonna be fine, little guy. Heh. 176 00:05:33,334 --> 00:05:35,149 Let's keep going. He's not gonna be fine. 177 00:05:35,243 --> 00:05:36,818 Yeah, besides, I can't walk into show-and-tell 178 00:05:36,986 --> 00:05:38,503 with half a dead crab, Tina. 179 00:05:38,730 --> 00:05:41,081 I'd get laughed out of there. I'd get booed. 180 00:05:41,233 --> 00:05:42,323 Wait, people boo at show-and-tell? 181 00:05:42,343 --> 00:05:44,158 I mean, Ms. Labonz boos sometimes. 182 00:05:44,236 --> 00:05:45,251 -Harsh. -Yeah. 183 00:05:45,404 --> 00:05:47,737 -Hey, there's Gus. -Hi, Gus. 184 00:05:47,756 --> 00:05:48,905 Hello, kids. 185 00:05:48,998 --> 00:05:49,906 You haven't caught any cannonballs 186 00:05:49,999 --> 00:05:51,016 with that thing, have you? 187 00:05:51,167 --> 00:05:52,425 Nope, just trying to catch my dinner. 188 00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,019 Well, I hope you reel in a pizza then. 189 00:05:54,246 --> 00:05:55,503 (chuckles) Just kidding. 190 00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,597 I know pizzas don't live in the ocean. 191 00:05:57,749 --> 00:05:59,916 You know, there were cannons all along the bluff up there. 192 00:05:59,935 --> 00:06:01,175 They went past the point. 193 00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:02,419 If I was looking for a cannonball, 194 00:06:02,512 --> 00:06:04,029 I'd look over there in the rocks. 195 00:06:04,198 --> 00:06:06,106 Not as many people walking around over there. 196 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,941 It's a little harder to get to. 197 00:06:08,093 --> 00:06:10,093 Or I'd look in the caves beyond the point 198 00:06:10,112 --> 00:06:11,611 -if it wasn't so dangerous. -Interesting. 199 00:06:11,763 --> 00:06:14,355 Another reason people don't go there is it gets pretty stinky. 200 00:06:14,375 --> 00:06:16,524 -How stinky we talking? -Pretty nasty. 201 00:06:16,618 --> 00:06:20,027 It comes from a seaweed that gets washed up called sargassum. 202 00:06:20,122 --> 00:06:21,605 Smells like rotten eggs. 203 00:06:21,623 --> 00:06:24,274 I got some in my boat in 1986 and it still smells. 204 00:06:24,292 --> 00:06:27,277 Not that my boat smelled great before that, but still. 205 00:06:27,295 --> 00:06:28,387 -Thanks, Gus. -You're welcome. 206 00:06:28,538 --> 00:06:30,222 Looks like we're going on those rocks. 207 00:06:30,373 --> 00:06:32,391 What? But Mom said no going on the rocks. 208 00:06:32,542 --> 00:06:34,451 And if we don't find anything there, 209 00:06:34,469 --> 00:06:35,877 -we're looking in the caves. -Dad said no caves! 210 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:38,972 Tina, that was before we got all the hot tips from Gus. 211 00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:40,399 The hot Gus goss. 212 00:06:40,550 --> 00:06:42,216 It's obviously where the cannonballs are gonna be. 213 00:06:42,236 --> 00:06:44,069 And look-- the tide's going out. 214 00:06:44,296 --> 00:06:45,311 It's perfectly safe. 215 00:06:45,464 --> 00:06:47,464 Oh, also, the tide's coming in, 216 00:06:47,482 --> 00:06:49,616 so you definitely don't want to go in the caves now. 217 00:06:49,726 --> 00:06:52,302 Unless you like drowning. Most people don't. 218 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,395 (muffled): So be careful looking around over there. 219 00:06:54,415 --> 00:06:55,655 -What did he say? -I don't know. 220 00:06:55,807 --> 00:06:57,657 -I think he caught a fish. -Oh. Way to go, Gus. 221 00:06:57,809 --> 00:07:00,419 -(muffled): Okay, then. -See Tina? Everything's great. 222 00:07:00,570 --> 00:07:03,070 Gus caught his dinner and I'm gonna be the winner. 223 00:07:03,165 --> 00:07:05,674 -Of show-and-tell. That's the spirit. -Aah, aah, aah, aah, aah! 224 00:07:09,412 --> 00:07:11,671 No cannonball there. No cannonball there. 225 00:07:11,823 --> 00:07:13,339 Whoa. Tina, you see anything? 226 00:07:13,492 --> 00:07:15,416 No, I'm kind of more focused on not falling off 227 00:07:15,510 --> 00:07:17,510 these very slippery rocks we're not supposed to be on 228 00:07:17,663 --> 00:07:19,512 and being taken away by the ocean. 229 00:07:19,665 --> 00:07:22,757 Oof, now I smell the seaweed Gus was talking about. 230 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,109 Oh, yeah, the sargassum. 231 00:07:24,260 --> 00:07:25,593 Are you being "sargasstic?" Ha! 232 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:27,779 Look at the not-dangerous fun we're having. 233 00:07:27,931 --> 00:07:29,522 Uh-huh, totally. Hey, 234 00:07:29,675 --> 00:07:31,191 I know I'm the one who said you should do something real 235 00:07:31,343 --> 00:07:33,009 for show-and-tell, but there's lots of real things 236 00:07:33,102 --> 00:07:35,528 -we can find that aren't near smelly, dangerous rocks. -Tina, 237 00:07:35,681 --> 00:07:39,199 this is my final show-and-tell. This has to be spectacular. 238 00:07:39,351 --> 00:07:42,519 I want people to say, "Just being near Louise Belcher 239 00:07:42,537 --> 00:07:43,870 "gives my life meaning. 240 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:47,023 Praise Louise Belcher. Praise Louise Belcher." 241 00:07:47,042 --> 00:07:48,633 Oh! I don't like when it does that. 242 00:07:48,860 --> 00:07:51,285 Well, maybe it doesn't like when you're so negative. 243 00:07:51,379 --> 00:07:52,712 Yup, yup. Sorry, ocean. 244 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:56,382 LINDA: Uh, the screen seems like it might be, uh... 245 00:07:56,535 --> 00:07:58,477 BOB: Incredibly inconvenient? 246 00:07:58,628 --> 00:08:01,629 No, I was gonna say, "a fun obstacle." 247 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:03,223 BOB: Why not just put the screen on the back wall? 248 00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:04,390 'Cause of the booths, Bob. 249 00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,151 If the screen's on the back wall, 250 00:08:06,378 --> 00:08:07,635 the people facing the door can't see it. 251 00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:10,380 This way everyone just has to turn their head. 252 00:08:10,398 --> 00:08:11,323 Yeah, people like watching things 253 00:08:11,399 --> 00:08:12,807 that are to the side of them. 254 00:08:12,901 --> 00:08:14,234 It's like, "Hey, you." 255 00:08:14,386 --> 00:08:15,810 -Teddy... -Bob, it's fine. 256 00:08:15,979 --> 00:08:17,070 It's just one day. 257 00:08:17,222 --> 00:08:18,388 And it's just one piece of paper. 258 00:08:18,481 --> 00:08:19,647 BOB: And also all of that. 259 00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:23,059 Right. So you had all these printed, Teddy? 260 00:08:23,152 --> 00:08:24,169 Well, I had to. You'd be surprised 261 00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:26,396 how few stores there are that sell posters 262 00:08:26,489 --> 00:08:28,173 with motivational hurling phrases on them. 263 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,250 What does "shorten the grip" mean? 264 00:08:30,344 --> 00:08:32,085 I'm not exactly sure. I just went online 265 00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:33,512 and looked up hurling phrases. 266 00:08:33,663 --> 00:08:34,587 Very smart. 267 00:08:34,740 --> 00:08:36,406 "Three cheers for crisp striking." 268 00:08:36,499 --> 00:08:39,075 I kind of made up the "three cheers" part of that one. 269 00:08:39,094 --> 00:08:40,167 It's good. 270 00:08:40,262 --> 00:08:41,578 Kathleen is gonna love it. 271 00:08:41,596 --> 00:08:43,355 Well, hopefully the other guys will like it, too. 272 00:08:43,582 --> 00:08:45,172 -Other guys? -Yeah, I found a local 273 00:08:45,267 --> 00:08:46,691 hurling enthusiast club online. 274 00:08:46,918 --> 00:08:48,360 -I invited them all. -Y-You did? 275 00:08:48,511 --> 00:08:51,087 Yeah, you can't watch an exciting live sporting event 276 00:08:51,106 --> 00:08:52,346 in a quiet restaurant. 277 00:08:52,366 --> 00:08:54,090 -Not that quiet. -Pretty quiet. 278 00:08:54,109 --> 00:08:55,516 Yeah, you can hear Bob breathing. 279 00:08:55,536 --> 00:08:56,943 -Really? You can? -Yeah, it's nice. 280 00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,278 -It's loud. -I can tell you're alive 281 00:08:58,430 --> 00:08:59,538 when you're back in the kitchen. 282 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,264 -I don't have to check on you. -BOB: Mm. 283 00:09:01,357 --> 00:09:03,357 Well, sounds like we may have a busy day. 284 00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,544 -That's good. -Yeah, I guess it is. 285 00:09:05,695 --> 00:09:07,528 -The online group is just three people. -BOB: Oh. 286 00:09:07,697 --> 00:09:09,864 Should we put this up here or should we put it outside? 287 00:09:09,958 --> 00:09:10,957 What's a good spot? 288 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:13,552 ♪ Oh, my old Irish Rose. ♪ 289 00:09:13,703 --> 00:09:15,887 It's not a real song, Bobby. I made it up. 290 00:09:16,039 --> 00:09:17,204 You thought it was a real song. 291 00:09:17,299 --> 00:09:18,539 It's not, it just sounds like one. 292 00:09:18,633 --> 00:09:22,710 Okay. Cool cave. But it doesn't smell great. 293 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,137 Huh, let's look. 294 00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:25,230 Nope, don't see any cannonballs in there. 295 00:09:25,381 --> 00:09:26,806 Oh, well, we tried. Guess we go back, 296 00:09:26,958 --> 00:09:28,215 see if that interesting 297 00:09:28,310 --> 00:09:28,900 half-crab is still hanging around? 298 00:09:29,127 --> 00:09:29,734 Tina, I'm going in. 299 00:09:29,961 --> 00:09:31,218 But Dad said no. 300 00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:32,796 And you know what's fun? Listening to your parents 301 00:09:32,814 --> 00:09:34,072 and remaining alive. 302 00:09:34,299 --> 00:09:36,575 It's fine, I can just go in there by myself. 303 00:09:36,726 --> 00:09:39,319 No need for you to feel guilty or responsible for my fate. 304 00:09:39,471 --> 00:09:41,246 Just because you're my big sister and my protector 305 00:09:41,397 --> 00:09:43,230 and finding something real and true was all your idea. 306 00:09:43,325 --> 00:09:45,475 But are we sure the tide is going out? 307 00:09:45,568 --> 00:09:47,493 Looks like it might be coming in? 308 00:09:47,646 --> 00:09:50,330 Tina, I've lived by the sea for over nine years now. 309 00:09:50,498 --> 00:09:53,240 I think I know a thing or two about the tides, m'kay? 310 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:54,408 Uh... 311 00:09:54,428 --> 00:09:56,319 Oh, uh-oh, look-- oh, I'm in. 312 00:09:56,412 --> 00:09:57,987 Ah, see how easy it is to go in? 313 00:09:58,081 --> 00:10:00,765 -Look how "in" I am. -Ugh. Fine. 314 00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:03,101 Whoa. (gags) 315 00:10:03,328 --> 00:10:05,586 Right? The smell is another thing 316 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:07,180 that keeps away the looky-loos. 317 00:10:07,332 --> 00:10:08,681 But not us, because we've been training 318 00:10:08,834 --> 00:10:10,442 our whole lives for this by living with Gene. 319 00:10:10,669 --> 00:10:14,428 Now, come on. Let's go find mama a cannonball! 320 00:10:14,448 --> 00:10:15,505 You guys good? 321 00:10:15,598 --> 00:10:17,357 (Irish accent): We're good. Cheers. 322 00:10:17,433 --> 00:10:19,100 Isn't this place great? Good banners, huh? 323 00:10:19,194 --> 00:10:20,510 Such good phrases. 324 00:10:20,528 --> 00:10:23,104 So, uh... who are you guys rooting for today? 325 00:10:23,198 --> 00:10:24,289 Waterford or Tipperary? 326 00:10:24,516 --> 00:10:26,107 Can't you tell by what we're wearing? 327 00:10:26,201 --> 00:10:28,201 It's obviously Waterfor... 328 00:10:28,295 --> 00:10:30,203 -Tipperary. -Of course. (laughs) 329 00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,279 'Cause those are the colors that Tipperary wears. 330 00:10:32,374 --> 00:10:33,706 This guy didn't know that, 331 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:34,874 -but I do. -What? 332 00:10:35,026 --> 00:10:36,042 What can I get you hurly-burlies? 333 00:10:36,194 --> 00:10:37,861 Burger of the day for me, please. 334 00:10:37,863 --> 00:10:38,862 -Same. -Me as well. 335 00:10:38,955 --> 00:10:40,121 And three beers, thanks. 336 00:10:40,289 --> 00:10:41,531 I'll put that order in for you gentlemen, 337 00:10:41,549 --> 00:10:42,882 and now, if you'll excuse me, 338 00:10:43,034 --> 00:10:44,625 I'm gonna go see if can tickle the ivory. 339 00:10:44,719 --> 00:10:46,719 I'm assuming that's what toilets are made of. 340 00:10:46,872 --> 00:10:47,871 -Wish me luck. -Gene. 341 00:10:47,889 --> 00:10:48,872 Go get 'em, honey. 342 00:10:48,890 --> 00:10:51,040 Okay, not loving this. 343 00:10:51,134 --> 00:10:52,800 Not loving this at all. 344 00:10:52,894 --> 00:10:55,320 Everything in my body is telling me we should leave. 345 00:10:55,547 --> 00:10:57,138 Mostly my nose, because of the smell. 346 00:10:57,232 --> 00:10:59,883 Oh, and yup, that's more water. 347 00:10:59,901 --> 00:11:01,217 Huh. That's more water! 348 00:11:01,219 --> 00:11:02,719 -Louise! -Yeah? 349 00:11:02,888 --> 00:11:03,811 Cool update. 350 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:04,904 The tide is coming in. 351 00:11:05,056 --> 00:11:06,981 Well, that's odd. And kind of rude. 352 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,667 But even if it is just now coming in, 353 00:11:08,894 --> 00:11:10,226 we have plenty of time. 354 00:11:10,245 --> 00:11:11,485 Come help me look over here. 355 00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:14,247 If I was a cannonball, I'd love this area. 356 00:11:14,399 --> 00:11:15,415 Whoa. But watch your step. 357 00:11:15,567 --> 00:11:17,250 There's a crevice. Not in a bad way. 358 00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:19,678 It's the good kind of crevice. (grunts) 359 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,589 Okay, that's a little bit alarming. 360 00:11:23,742 --> 00:11:27,427 I can see now that it doesn't seem totally safe to be in here. 361 00:11:27,579 --> 00:11:28,578 So, can we go? 362 00:11:28,596 --> 00:11:29,929 Did I hear you say five more minutes? 363 00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:30,763 That seems fair. 364 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,765 -Louise! -Ugh, okay. 365 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,008 Crap. It should not 366 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,601 be this hard to find a cannonball 367 00:11:35,754 --> 00:11:37,011 from the War of 1812. 368 00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:39,105 I want to write an angry letter to somebody. 369 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:41,182 Ken Burns, maybe? Damn it. 370 00:11:41,276 --> 00:11:42,608 Yeah, damn, damn, damn. 371 00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,536 And also if we could just pick up the pace a bit. 372 00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:45,929 -Tina. -What is it? 373 00:11:45,947 --> 00:11:47,430 Something that we can walk and talk about? 374 00:11:47,523 --> 00:11:49,265 Cannonball! 375 00:11:49,284 --> 00:11:51,267 Wait, seriously? I can't believe it. 376 00:11:51,286 --> 00:11:52,769 Yeah, sneaky little cannonball. 377 00:11:52,787 --> 00:11:54,528 Thought you could hide from me. 378 00:11:54,548 --> 00:11:57,290 Oh, it's stuck. Here, help me dig around it. 379 00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,050 -Louise! -Yeah, yeah, yeah, the tide. 380 00:11:59,277 --> 00:12:00,719 I know. That's all you talk about now. 381 00:12:00,795 --> 00:12:02,111 Keep digging! (grunting) 382 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:03,704 I don't want to die, I don't want to die. 383 00:12:03,798 --> 00:12:04,781 Saying that is super helpful. 384 00:12:04,799 --> 00:12:06,307 -Is it? -No. 385 00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:11,212 I did it! I found it! I'm the amazing girl 386 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,064 who found a cannonball in a stinky cave. 387 00:12:13,216 --> 00:12:14,715 Congratulations, Louise. But you know 388 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:17,310 what's a little more important right now than that cannonball-- 389 00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:19,812 -air, and breathing it. -Agree to disagree. 390 00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:21,297 We have to go. 391 00:12:21,316 --> 00:12:22,982 Uh-uh, no way am I leaving this thing. 392 00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:24,225 She's my baby now. 393 00:12:24,319 --> 00:12:25,985 Which makes you her aunt. Keep digging. 394 00:12:26,137 --> 00:12:27,579 Louise, it's wedged between the rocks. 395 00:12:27,730 --> 00:12:29,581 -Digging's not gonna help. -Is that what they said 396 00:12:29,732 --> 00:12:31,491 when those raiders discovered the lost Ark? 397 00:12:31,585 --> 00:12:33,084 -No. So dig. -(groans) 398 00:12:33,236 --> 00:12:35,236 Dig till our faces melt off! 399 00:12:35,404 --> 00:12:36,921 BOB: This is really not ideal. 400 00:12:37,073 --> 00:12:39,148 I like turning my head like this. 401 00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:40,333 I'm stretching out my neck. 402 00:12:40,485 --> 00:12:41,742 Also, it's kind of like you're in prison 403 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:42,819 and I've come to visit you. 404 00:12:42,837 --> 00:12:44,578 -BOB: Mm. -Hey, Kathleen. 405 00:12:44,672 --> 00:12:46,005 -Hiya. -Kathleen, you made it. 406 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:48,249 Wow! Look at all this. 407 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,935 It's fun, right? Welcome to the Hurling Zone. 408 00:12:51,162 --> 00:12:52,845 (laughs) Eh... 409 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,255 -Do you like the banners? -Yeah. 410 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:55,756 -I don't think it's too many. -No. 411 00:12:55,776 --> 00:12:57,442 I-I think it's the right amount of banners. And those 412 00:12:57,593 --> 00:12:59,519 are some fellow hurling heads. (chuckles) 413 00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:01,762 Ooh, I think some of them are from Ireland. 414 00:13:01,931 --> 00:13:03,006 Do you know them? 415 00:13:03,024 --> 00:13:03,931 It's a pretty big country, Teddy. 416 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,099 Oh, wait, that's my dad. 417 00:13:05,176 --> 00:13:06,509 -What? -I'm kidding. 418 00:13:06,528 --> 00:13:08,011 -Right, right. -Could be a cousin though. 419 00:13:08,029 --> 00:13:10,029 So, you folks watch hurling, then? 420 00:13:10,106 --> 00:13:11,364 -They do now. -Yeah, we do. 421 00:13:11,516 --> 00:13:13,516 -Sports. -We're-we're trying it out today 422 00:13:13,535 --> 00:13:15,794 and seeing how it goes. I don't love the screen 423 00:13:15,870 --> 00:13:17,036 being where it is 424 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,355 and I-I miss the way things were before. 425 00:13:19,374 --> 00:13:21,357 -Oh. -But, yeah, everything's fine. 426 00:13:21,376 --> 00:13:23,876 I miss the way things were before, too. 427 00:13:24,029 --> 00:13:24,952 When I could poop. 428 00:13:25,046 --> 00:13:26,379 -What? -Don't look at me! 429 00:13:26,531 --> 00:13:27,697 -He's constipated. -GENE: Just in my butt. 430 00:13:27,790 --> 00:13:30,533 -Uh, have a seat, Kathleen. -Okay. Thank you. 431 00:13:30,626 --> 00:13:32,310 -Can you see okay? -Yeah, sure. 432 00:13:32,537 --> 00:13:33,460 Is there any sound? 433 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,129 It's coming out of the projector. 434 00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,222 If you're really quiet, you can hear it. 435 00:13:36,299 --> 00:13:37,816 Shh, shh, shh. Do you hear it? 436 00:13:38,043 --> 00:13:38,817 Oh, yeah, there it is. 437 00:13:39,044 --> 00:13:40,043 Oh, it's starting. 438 00:13:40,061 --> 00:13:41,044 Look at those guys. 439 00:13:41,062 --> 00:13:42,378 Look at them hurl. 440 00:13:42,471 --> 00:13:44,380 Okay, I'm gonna pull. Move over. 441 00:13:44,399 --> 00:13:46,215 TINA: Quickly. They're gonna be pulling us out of here 442 00:13:46,234 --> 00:13:48,234 -once we drown. -Don't be so dramatic 443 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:51,478 just because it might happen. Hey, maybe we can pry it out. 444 00:13:51,573 --> 00:13:52,997 People pry stuff out of things, right? 445 00:13:53,149 --> 00:13:54,815 And another wave. 446 00:13:54,909 --> 00:13:56,576 We've got this, Tina. All that's left 447 00:13:56,728 --> 00:13:59,412 is to pop this sucker out and skip to freedom. 448 00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:01,247 -I'm not very good at skipping. -Aah! 449 00:14:01,399 --> 00:14:03,875 Just let go, cannonball. Come to me. 450 00:14:04,027 --> 00:14:06,069 I can take you away from all of this. 451 00:14:06,162 --> 00:14:07,846 Wow, look at them 452 00:14:07,997 --> 00:14:09,405 do what they're doing. 453 00:14:09,424 --> 00:14:11,424 I mean, I knew I was gonna see some hurling, 454 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,259 but I didn't know I was gonna see hurling. 455 00:14:13,411 --> 00:14:16,020 Uh, yeah. Excuse me, I have to go 456 00:14:16,172 --> 00:14:17,188 to the restroom. I've been holding it in 457 00:14:17,415 --> 00:14:18,414 since, uh, I got here. (short chuckle) 458 00:14:18,433 --> 00:14:20,007 GENE: Have fun in there. 459 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,934 -Must be nice. -It's just a wee. 460 00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,844 GENE: That's how they all start. 461 00:14:23,864 --> 00:14:24,770 -TEDDY: Guys. -What? 462 00:14:24,923 --> 00:14:25,846 I'm so nervous. 463 00:14:25,940 --> 00:14:27,181 I-I don't get this game at all. 464 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,608 Does it seem like I know what I'm talking about? 465 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:31,260 -Oh, yeah. -Really? Good, 'cause I'm freaking out. 466 00:14:31,279 --> 00:14:34,097 Why? It's going good. Right, Bob? 467 00:14:34,115 --> 00:14:35,281 Oh, oh, yeah. 468 00:14:35,433 --> 00:14:36,690 Um, from what I can see from under here, 469 00:14:36,710 --> 00:14:40,103 you're-you're not acting too strangely at all. 470 00:14:40,196 --> 00:14:42,380 Uh, no. What? We don't want more fries. 471 00:14:42,531 --> 00:14:44,941 Always upselling the fries, these two. 472 00:14:44,959 --> 00:14:47,051 -Oh, I'll take more fries. -Great. More fries, please. 473 00:14:47,278 --> 00:14:48,720 That's what I was trying to tell you, Bob. 474 00:14:48,871 --> 00:14:50,947 -You got to learn to listen. -BOB: Mm-hmm. 475 00:14:50,965 --> 00:14:52,056 (Tina and Louise grunting) 476 00:14:52,208 --> 00:14:53,799 Pull harder! 477 00:14:53,968 --> 00:14:55,393 (both grunting) 478 00:14:55,544 --> 00:14:57,729 Oh! Oh, oh, my butt. 479 00:14:57,956 --> 00:14:59,880 (gasps) Tina, look. We did it! 480 00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:02,734 Yeah, great. Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go. 481 00:15:02,885 --> 00:15:03,960 Ow. Butt. 482 00:15:03,978 --> 00:15:04,903 Ow. So heavy. 483 00:15:05,130 --> 00:15:07,313 Ow. Butt. Okay, dropping it. 484 00:15:07,465 --> 00:15:10,133 -Okay, picking it up again. Ow, ow, -Faster. 485 00:15:10,151 --> 00:15:11,725 -ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. -Faster, faster. 486 00:15:11,819 --> 00:15:13,244 Oh, my butt. Oh, my butt. 487 00:15:13,471 --> 00:15:16,139 Okay, this crevice is probably easier to jump over 488 00:15:16,232 --> 00:15:18,082 when you're not carrying a heavy cannonball. 489 00:15:18,309 --> 00:15:19,976 I'm assuming. Stand back. 490 00:15:19,994 --> 00:15:21,568 I'm gonna shot-put this baby over. 491 00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:23,479 Wait, is that a good idea? Oh, you're doing it. 492 00:15:23,572 --> 00:15:24,830 -Aah! -Aah! 493 00:15:24,925 --> 00:15:25,982 No! My angel! 494 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:27,425 Aah! I can't reach it. 495 00:15:27,652 --> 00:15:29,576 I can't even see it. Where did it go? 496 00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,337 I'm pretty sure it went down there. 497 00:15:31,414 --> 00:15:33,322 Is that not what you wanted to hear? 498 00:15:33,341 --> 00:15:34,974 -Aah! -Guess not. 499 00:15:38,587 --> 00:15:42,181 -Louise, we have to go. -No. I can swim down and get it. 500 00:15:42,333 --> 00:15:44,834 It's fine, I'm already covered in stink water. 501 00:15:44,852 --> 00:15:46,760 Do you have any scuba gear? No? 502 00:15:46,854 --> 00:15:49,338 That crevice is so deep we can't even see the bottom. 503 00:15:49,357 --> 00:15:51,674 The cannonball is gone. We have to go. 504 00:15:51,693 --> 00:15:52,617 -But... -Now! 505 00:15:52,768 --> 00:15:55,178 (groans) Okay, fine. 506 00:15:55,196 --> 00:15:57,956 Let's go. Goodbye, stupid cannonball. 507 00:15:58,183 --> 00:15:59,606 You could have had a beautiful life. 508 00:15:59,701 --> 00:16:02,368 You could have been part of show-and-tell history. 509 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:05,463 Not just dumb old War of 1812 history. 510 00:16:05,614 --> 00:16:08,091 -Up here. -(grunts) 511 00:16:10,119 --> 00:16:12,470 Okay, that was probably the last wave. 512 00:16:12,547 --> 00:16:14,263 Should we head back in? 513 00:16:15,049 --> 00:16:16,641 Yeah, never mind. 514 00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:19,702 Mmm. Oh, wow. (laughs) 515 00:16:19,871 --> 00:16:21,370 It's like I'm nervous. 516 00:16:21,389 --> 00:16:22,647 Do you eat more when you're nervous? 517 00:16:22,874 --> 00:16:24,557 I mean, I'm not. I don't. I mean, I don't. 518 00:16:24,709 --> 00:16:25,966 -Yeah, no. -Uh, Linda. 519 00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:28,319 -Can we get more fries, please? -Uh, sure. 520 00:16:28,546 --> 00:16:30,304 This is so much better than hockey. 521 00:16:30,398 --> 00:16:32,882 I-I can't even believe I liked that garbage. 522 00:16:32,900 --> 00:16:34,516 And watched every game I could 523 00:16:34,518 --> 00:16:36,310 and I'm involved in a bunch of fantasy hockey leagues. 524 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,312 -Remind me to quit those. -(chuckles): Okay. 525 00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,905 How we doing on those fries, Bob? 526 00:16:40,058 --> 00:16:40,906 Coming up, Teddy. 527 00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:43,392 You literally just ordered them. 528 00:16:43,411 --> 00:16:44,985 -Uh-oh. Oh, no. -Oh, boy. 529 00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:47,005 -Oh... -I think we're gonna head out. 530 00:16:47,232 --> 00:16:48,006 -Thanks. -Wait. 531 00:16:48,233 --> 00:16:49,323 Where are you guys going? 532 00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,676 It's just a bit hard to hear. And see. 533 00:16:51,827 --> 00:16:53,736 so we might watch the rest at Julian's house. 534 00:16:53,829 --> 00:16:55,588 Uh, no, no, no. Don't leave. 535 00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:57,590 This is the Hurling Zone. We're having fun. 536 00:16:57,742 --> 00:16:58,850 Hey, can you believe, uh, 537 00:16:59,019 --> 00:17:00,743 how much those guys shortened the grip? 538 00:17:00,836 --> 00:17:02,912 You said that a few times today. 539 00:17:02,930 --> 00:17:04,930 I'm not sure you know what it means. 540 00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,024 But, thanks. Bye. 541 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,192 The grip. They shortened it. 542 00:17:08,419 --> 00:17:09,935 Damn it. No, wait. Don't you leave, too. 543 00:17:10,012 --> 00:17:11,529 I'll get better at hurling watching. 544 00:17:11,756 --> 00:17:13,013 I'll learn to love it and then we can 545 00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:14,681 have the same hobbies and it'll be great. 546 00:17:14,701 --> 00:17:17,093 I was just getting up to get more napkins, Teddy. 547 00:17:17,186 --> 00:17:18,611 Oh. Oh, good. (chuckles) 548 00:17:18,763 --> 00:17:21,597 Ah! Oh. Something's changed. Opportunity's knocking. 549 00:17:21,690 --> 00:17:22,689 Time to take my shot. 550 00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:24,024 -BOB: Ow. -Sorry. 551 00:17:24,118 --> 00:17:25,451 Excuse me. This is bigger than all of us! 552 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:28,028 Teddy, it seems like maybe you're trying 553 00:17:28,197 --> 00:17:30,531 way too hard for us to like the same thing? 554 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,440 Damn it. Greasy fingers. 555 00:17:31,459 --> 00:17:33,384 But isn't that what people who 556 00:17:33,536 --> 00:17:35,628 may or may not want to spend more time 557 00:17:35,780 --> 00:17:37,129 with another person do? 558 00:17:37,282 --> 00:17:38,890 Because, I mean, in the past, 559 00:17:39,117 --> 00:17:41,300 I've spent time with people where we had 560 00:17:41,452 --> 00:17:43,895 none of the same interests and it didn't end great, 561 00:17:44,122 --> 00:17:45,121 'cause we got divorced. 562 00:17:45,123 --> 00:17:46,213 Teddy, I think it's fine 563 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:47,473 we have different interests. 564 00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,550 I like learning what different stuff you like. 565 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,569 And I already know about what stuff I like. 566 00:17:51,796 --> 00:17:53,720 I don't even like some of the stuff I like. 567 00:17:53,815 --> 00:17:55,055 -BOB: Come on. -So, it's okay 568 00:17:55,149 --> 00:17:57,483 that I-I don't like hurling very much? At all. 569 00:17:57,635 --> 00:17:59,468 And I can't seem to follow it for some reason 570 00:17:59,562 --> 00:18:00,486 and it makes me angry? 571 00:18:00,638 --> 00:18:02,471 Of course it is. You're not Irish. 572 00:18:02,490 --> 00:18:05,399 We legally have to like it. Linda, tell him. 573 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,326 Do you and Bob like all the same things? 574 00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:09,478 Oh, God, no. I like cool stuff 575 00:18:09,497 --> 00:18:10,663 and Bob likes working on that little 576 00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:13,091 model airplane for, like, the last ten years. 577 00:18:13,318 --> 00:18:14,575 It hasn't been ten years. 578 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,410 Wait, it might be longer. 579 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:17,929 -Crap. -See? 580 00:18:18,156 --> 00:18:19,655 You big, stupid dummy. 581 00:18:19,748 --> 00:18:21,432 So I get to keep all my hockey embroidery art 582 00:18:21,584 --> 00:18:22,767 -from Etsy? -KATHLEEN: Hell no. 583 00:18:22,918 --> 00:18:25,252 -Okay. -Teddy, of course you can. 584 00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:27,663 -Oh, thank God. -Mom! Dad! 585 00:18:27,756 --> 00:18:29,423 The eagle has landed! 586 00:18:29,592 --> 00:18:31,334 I'm myself again. I'm better than myself. 587 00:18:31,502 --> 00:18:33,277 I feel like I can do a cartwheel. 588 00:18:33,429 --> 00:18:34,112 (grunts) 589 00:18:34,339 --> 00:18:35,613 Nope, still can't do that. 590 00:18:35,764 --> 00:18:37,448 We're very happy for you, Gene. 591 00:18:37,675 --> 00:18:39,175 You put in the effort and you did it. 592 00:18:39,268 --> 00:18:41,285 You know, we don't have to watch the second half, Teddy. 593 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:43,121 It's-it's... it's just a beautiful game, 594 00:18:43,272 --> 00:18:45,790 -and kind of a metaphor for life. -No, I want to. 595 00:18:46,017 --> 00:18:47,274 Now that I'm not pretending to like it, 596 00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:48,793 -I-I might actually like it. -Oh, my God. 597 00:18:48,944 --> 00:18:50,611 You like it because it doesn't make any sense, is that right? 598 00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:52,279 I will stick this fork in you, Teddy. 599 00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:54,615 All right, all right. Teach me something. 600 00:18:54,709 --> 00:18:56,525 Okay, the ball is called a sliotar. 601 00:18:56,619 --> 00:18:58,452 -TEDDY: Sleeter? -KATHLEEN: (chuckles) Sliotar. 602 00:18:58,546 --> 00:19:00,138 -Shleeter. -That's it. Kind of. 603 00:19:00,365 --> 00:19:01,788 TEDDY: I never was good at languages. 604 00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:03,641 LOUISE: Ugh. What a frickin' bust. 605 00:19:03,792 --> 00:19:07,203 No cannonball, my butt hurts, I smell like a butt. 606 00:19:07,296 --> 00:19:09,054 (sniffs) I think I might not smell. 607 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,540 But it's hard to tell 'cause I'm walking next to you. 608 00:19:11,634 --> 00:19:12,966 What the hell am I gonna do for tomorrow? 609 00:19:13,060 --> 00:19:15,227 Hey, what if we made our own cannonball? 610 00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:16,637 No one knows what they really look like. 611 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,898 We could paint a Skee-Ball from Wonder Wharf. 612 00:19:19,050 --> 00:19:19,991 They'll never know the difference. 613 00:19:20,218 --> 00:19:21,492 I could put some fake blood on it. 614 00:19:21,644 --> 00:19:23,494 Not sure if a cannonball would have blood on it, 615 00:19:23,721 --> 00:19:24,662 just thinking out loud. 616 00:19:24,813 --> 00:19:26,146 You know, Louise, you could 617 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:27,314 tell what really happened. 618 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:30,059 Oh, what, Tina-- that I failed? 619 00:19:30,077 --> 00:19:31,502 That I lost the cannonball, 620 00:19:31,579 --> 00:19:33,729 I got stinky sarguss-whatever on me, 621 00:19:33,822 --> 00:19:34,855 I bruised my butt? 622 00:19:34,916 --> 00:19:36,582 Everyone's always talking about how cool 623 00:19:36,751 --> 00:19:39,844 butt bruises are, right? No, I'm not doing that. 624 00:19:39,995 --> 00:19:41,679 Real life Louise is too disappointing. 625 00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:44,348 Louise, I know you think you've got to impress everybody, 626 00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:46,575 but I bet the kids in your class would like to hear about 627 00:19:46,627 --> 00:19:48,761 the stuff that's maybe a little embarrassing. 628 00:19:48,913 --> 00:19:51,505 Sometimes those stories are even better than the stories 629 00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:53,749 where everything goes right. 'Cause they're real. 630 00:19:53,842 --> 00:19:56,009 And because that kind of stuff happens to everybody. 631 00:19:56,029 --> 00:19:59,012 I mean, there's probably not always a cannonball involved, 632 00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:00,347 but sometimes, I'm assuming? 633 00:20:00,441 --> 00:20:02,258 And I hope you won't take it too personally 634 00:20:02,276 --> 00:20:04,202 if I walk a few feet away from you. 635 00:20:04,429 --> 00:20:06,019 'Cause I mean, it is personal, um, 636 00:20:06,113 --> 00:20:07,354 from a hygienic standpoint, 637 00:20:07,490 --> 00:20:09,624 but, you know. You know what I mean. 638 00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:14,027 So, yeah, I tried, 639 00:20:14,047 --> 00:20:16,029 but I didn't get the cannonball, 640 00:20:16,123 --> 00:20:17,364 and... the end. 641 00:20:17,458 --> 00:20:19,533 Of show-and-tell, for me, forever. 642 00:20:19,627 --> 00:20:22,127 Uh... so... 643 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:23,462 What's that smell? 644 00:20:23,631 --> 00:20:26,115 It's called sargassum. It's a stinky seaweed 645 00:20:26,117 --> 00:20:28,284 that I'm thinking of selling to the government 646 00:20:28,302 --> 00:20:30,786 -as a biological weapon. -(chuckling) 647 00:20:30,788 --> 00:20:33,456 The cool part is you can wash your hair five times, 648 00:20:33,549 --> 00:20:34,640 and it doesn't come out. 649 00:20:34,792 --> 00:20:36,883 But luckily, I love the smell of fish farts, 650 00:20:36,978 --> 00:20:38,402 -so that works for me. -(laughing) 651 00:20:38,554 --> 00:20:40,404 Oh, and by the way, I also fell 652 00:20:40,556 --> 00:20:42,631 and hit my butt on a rock. I have a bruise 653 00:20:42,725 --> 00:20:46,059 that looks sort of like this. Like Australia. 654 00:20:46,153 --> 00:20:49,580 -Or "Ass-tralia?" -Louise, don't say Ass-tralia. 655 00:20:49,807 --> 00:20:51,140 And no butt drawings. 656 00:20:51,233 --> 00:20:53,233 Hey, no bruise shaming, Labonz. 657 00:20:53,253 --> 00:20:54,418 Does anybody else have a question? 658 00:20:54,645 --> 00:20:57,571 ♪ One hand tackle and a two hand catch ♪ 659 00:20:57,590 --> 00:20:59,815 -♪ Now we've got shemozzle ♪ -♪ Got the... thing ♪ 660 00:20:59,834 --> 00:21:02,075 -♪ And we're leading the match, come on ♪ -♪ Uh... ♪ 661 00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:04,820 ♪ Sitting on the town end, no place I'd rather be ♪ 662 00:21:04,913 --> 00:21:08,582 ♪ If it's our fate to lose then let's blame the referee ♪ 663 00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:10,659 ♪ You think your team can take us? ♪ 664 00:21:10,678 --> 00:21:12,661 -♪ Just look at the score ♪ -♪ Dah-bah, dah-dah, score ♪ 665 00:21:12,755 --> 00:21:16,089 ♪ 'Cause we've been winning since 1884 ♪ 666 00:21:16,183 --> 00:21:19,852 ♪ Yeah, we've been winning since 1884 ♪ 667 00:21:20,004 --> 00:21:22,004 ♪ So, raise a glass to the tip-top ♪ 668 00:21:22,097 --> 00:21:23,430 ♪ We'll never be knocked off ♪ 669 00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:26,175 ♪ And if you root for someone else ♪ 670 00:21:26,268 --> 00:21:27,601 KATHLEEN: ♪ Well, then you can just... ♪ 671 00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:28,677 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 672 00:21:28,679 --> 00:21:29,996 and TOYOTA.