1 00:00:01,042 --> 00:00:03,044 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 2 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,982 {\an8}LINDA: Look at us going to a birthday party as a family. 3 00:00:23,982 --> 00:00:26,359 {\an8}Nothing cooler than partying with your parents. 4 00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,695 {\an8}Damn straight. See, they even let us say damn. 5 00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:29,821 {\an8}Uh-huh. Don't say damn. 6 00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:32,574 {\an8}So I sort of see how me, Gene and Tina 7 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:34,617 {\an8}got invited to Rudy's dad's birthday party, 8 00:00:34,617 --> 00:00:35,910 {\an8}'cause we're Rudy's friends. 9 00:00:35,910 --> 00:00:37,996 {\an8}But Mom and Dad, what's going on there? 10 00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:40,415 {\an8}Well, we saw him at the parent-teacher conference. 11 00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:41,666 {\an8}He guilt-invited us. 12 00:00:41,666 --> 00:00:43,126 {\an8}- We were guilt-invited. - Yeah. 13 00:00:45,962 --> 00:00:47,714 {\an8}Oh. Sorry to be "on his phone" guy. 14 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:49,049 {\an8}Just shooting off a quick email. 15 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,301 {\an8}Ooh, email? Who are you emailing? 16 00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,762 {\an8}- Oh, a bowling alley. - That's fun. 17 00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:56,973 {\an8}- Yeah, just planning a bowling party. - Uh, Rudy's party? 18 00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:00,060 {\an8}No. Mine. It's a little thing I do for my birthday every year. 19 00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:01,478 {\an8}Oh, I love bowling. 20 00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:04,939 {\an8}Oh, uh, do you want to come 21 00:01:04,939 --> 00:01:06,441 {\an8}- to the party? - You don't have to do that. 22 00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:07,776 {\an8}Yeah. Yes. 23 00:01:08,526 --> 00:01:10,487 {\an8}Well, I just hope Rudy has a good time. 24 00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:12,781 {\an8}He's up to his butt in divorced parent dating drama, 25 00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:14,407 {\an8}and he deserves to have fun tonight. 26 00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:17,869 {\an8}By the way, have we made you guys sign paperwork saying you won't get divorced? 27 00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:20,830 {\an8}No? I'll have Ken draw it up. He did my estate papers. 28 00:01:20,830 --> 00:01:22,290 {\an8}I like our odds. 29 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:25,293 {\an8}I love your dad as much as I did the first time I told him I loved him. 30 00:01:25,502 --> 00:01:28,254 {\an8}Remember that, Bob? You remember when I first said I love you? 31 00:01:28,254 --> 00:01:29,756 {\an8}(HESITANTLY) Y... Yes. 32 00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:33,009 {\an8}- Remember where we were? - I do. 33 00:01:33,218 --> 00:01:35,095 {\an8}Where were you guys, Dad? 34 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,221 {\an8}Um... 35 00:01:36,971 --> 00:01:40,350 {\an8}Maybe he remembers, but he's getting choked up thinking about it? 36 00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:43,103 {\an8}We were, um... Uh... 37 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,939 {\an8}- No, he forgot. - Oh, it's okay you forgot. 38 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,607 {\an8}Your brain is just full of burger toppings. 39 00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:50,527 {\an8}I'm gonna remember. It's, um... 40 00:01:50,527 --> 00:01:52,570 Do you remember when I farted 41 00:01:52,570 --> 00:01:55,365 and it sounded like someone saying, "What's up?" 42 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:57,325 - Yes. - So you can remember that. 43 00:01:57,325 --> 00:01:58,993 Well, that was right when we got in the car. 44 00:01:58,993 --> 00:02:00,745 - Yeah. - Yeah. So that's more recent. 45 00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:03,456 GENE: I just wanted to make sure everyone caught that. Pretty special. 46 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:04,582 BOB: Certainly was. 47 00:02:06,251 --> 00:02:10,171 BOB: Was it outdoors, the place where you first said I love you, or indoors? 48 00:02:10,171 --> 00:02:11,339 LINDA: Bob, don't worry about it. 49 00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:13,967 - Hey, Rudy. - Hey, guys. Thanks for coming. 50 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,927 It was surprisingly hard to get kids our age excited 51 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,138 about a 44-year-old man's birthday party. 52 00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:21,850 I don't know why. We love people talking about podcasts and back pain. 53 00:02:22,016 --> 00:02:23,434 You guys want to get some slushies? 54 00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:25,645 It's all-you-can-drink slushies. My dad's treat. 55 00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:26,729 - Whoa! - Nice. 56 00:02:26,729 --> 00:02:28,481 All I can drink? 'Cause that's probably different 57 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:29,774 from all you can drink. 58 00:02:29,774 --> 00:02:32,110 Whoa! I'm getting a brain freeze just thinking about it. 59 00:02:32,443 --> 00:02:35,280 - Mom, Dad, smell you later. Bye. - Smell... Yeah, yeah. 60 00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:40,577 - Who doesn't love a free slushy? - Maybe that lady. 61 00:02:41,411 --> 00:02:42,620 (GROANS) 62 00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:45,748 If it was socially acceptable to lick that off the floor, I would. 63 00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:48,543 - It isn't, is it? - Uh, Rudy? Everything okay? 64 00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:50,587 You're looking very un-slushy. 65 00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:53,548 Yeah. Sorry. It's my mom's boyfriend, Paul. 66 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:57,427 Look at him. Smiling, listening to people talk, making eye contact. 67 00:02:57,427 --> 00:02:58,553 What's up with that? 68 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:01,639 - Ugh! Hate that. - RUDY: I'm just worried about my dad. 69 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:04,434 He's fragile, especially since he and Vicki broke up. 70 00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:07,353 - Oh, no. Who broke up with who? - It was pretty mutual. 71 00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:09,772 He sent her a text saying, "We need to talk," 72 00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:11,608 and she wrote back, "Break up?" 73 00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:12,984 Then she gave her own text a thumbs up, 74 00:03:12,984 --> 00:03:14,319 and that was that. 75 00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:15,445 Damn. 76 00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:17,697 So what I'm hearing is your dad's a free man again. 77 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:18,823 He's back on the market. 78 00:03:18,823 --> 00:03:21,117 Yeah, he's selling hot dad by the pound. 79 00:03:21,117 --> 00:03:23,828 It's just Dad's like a delicate caterpillar 80 00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:26,247 waiting to become a big, strong, beautiful butterfly. 81 00:03:26,247 --> 00:03:28,708 But that's not gonna happen if Mr. Nice All the Time Paul 82 00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:30,960 comes over and steps on Dad's sweet little cocoon. 83 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,922 And how is Paul stepping on your dad's cocoon? 84 00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:38,009 Seriously, Tina? Look at him. I just... It doesn't feel good. 85 00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:41,304 - It's just not good. - Rudy. Rudy, just breathe. 86 00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:43,306 - I'm bad at that. - Oh, right. 87 00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:46,059 I just want tonight to be the bowling party of his dreams 88 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:48,269 and the perfect 44th birthday. 89 00:03:48,269 --> 00:03:49,354 Okay. Done. 90 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:51,105 - What? - Done. It shall be so. 91 00:03:51,105 --> 00:03:53,942 Just leave it to me, Gene and also Tina. 92 00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,110 - Okay. - Another round, please, sir. 93 00:03:56,110 --> 00:03:58,363 And don't skimp on the cheer-up syrup. 94 00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:01,616 MAN: Men's size 11 and a ladies' size nine and a half. 95 00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:03,785 {\an8}These are cute. Look at these, Bob. 96 00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:06,162 {\an8}I mean, they're bowling shoes. But sure. 97 00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:08,248 I would wear these, like, in the world. 98 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:11,000 - Really? - It's hard to find cute shoes. You know. 99 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,586 - Oh, I do know. - Oh, hey. You guys made it. 100 00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:15,713 - Yeah. Hi. - Happy birthday. 101 00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:18,341 - Great shoes. Aren't they nice? - Ah. Yes. 102 00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:22,178 We were just waiting for our lane assignment. I guess it's pretty busy. 103 00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:24,430 - Oh, do you want to... - No. 104 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,641 - ...bowl in our lane? - I wasn't... I was not... 105 00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:29,018 - ...saying that at all. - Sure. Right, Bob? 106 00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:30,353 - Yeah. - Yeah. 107 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:33,564 Okay. I'll just tell the guy at the counter to add you. 108 00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:36,776 - Yay! Fun. - Oh, my God. We did it again. 109 00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:39,612 I love these shoes. I'm putting them on. 110 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:42,365 They got my size right on the back. That's fun. 111 00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,993 So, our job tonight is to make your dad look good. 112 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,078 Set him up for success. Help him shine. 113 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:50,540 And if Paul looks like a pathetic dork by comparison, that's fine too. 114 00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,833 So, what are your dad's strengths? 115 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,002 Well, the man knows how to rock a pant pleat. 116 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:56,879 I've noticed. You can cut a finger on those bad boys. 117 00:04:56,879 --> 00:04:58,256 He's also a pretty good bowler. 118 00:04:58,256 --> 00:05:00,174 They don't call him Spare-ticus for nothing. 119 00:05:00,174 --> 00:05:01,551 And by they, I mean me. 120 00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:03,177 Great. Okay. Well, we can work with that. 121 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:06,431 RUDY: But Paul is Paul. He's probably great at bowling. 122 00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:07,640 He's good at everything. 123 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:10,977 I once saw a valet throw him his keys from, like, six feet away. 124 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:12,937 And Paul caught it like it was nothing. 125 00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:14,063 - Whoa... - Right? 126 00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:18,401 I mean, Paul doesn't seem that athletic and naturally strong but also gentle. 127 00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:21,821 I don't feel like giving him a trophy just for the cool way he's standing. 128 00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:24,240 (SIGHS) I just wish my dad was still with Vicki. 129 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,492 She was, you know, whatever the opposite of fun is. 130 00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:28,077 But at least he wouldn't be single 131 00:05:28,077 --> 00:05:30,413 while Mom was hugging it up with Paul over there. 132 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:31,497 Okay. All right. All right. 133 00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:34,709 Listen. We've got the bowling thing. We've got the dating thing. 134 00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:37,962 Maybe we just get him a girlfriend that's good at bowling? 135 00:05:37,962 --> 00:05:39,464 You can get a girlfriend in one night, right? 136 00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:40,548 Uh... 137 00:05:40,548 --> 00:05:42,759 Rudy, any prospects here right now, by any chance? 138 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:47,055 I mean, there's that lady over there, Sherry from his Indian cooking class. 139 00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:49,474 They're both allergic to cumin, and they really bonded 140 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:52,560 over how dumb it is for people with a cumin allergy to take that class. 141 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:53,644 - Aw! - Also, 142 00:05:53,644 --> 00:05:56,189 I wish I could have plucked my dad's one crazy eyebrow hair. 143 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,191 I mean, it really would've helped his chances. 144 00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,985 - Oh, yeah, I can see it from here. - Yeah, it's a beast. 145 00:06:00,985 --> 00:06:03,446 Is it possible it's moving around on its own? 146 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:04,989 Rudy, come on. Our lane's ready. 147 00:06:04,989 --> 00:06:07,867 Oh, and, kids, your parents are bowling with us. 148 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:10,536 Lucky you. Seriously, though, they're a fun couple. 149 00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:12,830 Them plus your mom and Paul. That makes six. 150 00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:16,709 - Did you say Mom and Paul? - Yeah. There they are. 151 00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:17,794 - Hey. - Hey. 152 00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:21,506 - See you soon, bowling buddies. - Oh, boy. That's it. 153 00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:24,425 Dad and "good at everything" Paul are bowling against each other. 154 00:06:24,425 --> 00:06:25,885 Paul will crush him. 155 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:29,180 Worst-case scenario, Dad's cocoon getting stomped, 156 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,848 caterpillar guts everywhere. 157 00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:32,975 No, no, no. Okay. All right, listen. 158 00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:36,604 We're not gonna let Paul humiliate your father on his birthday, okay? 159 00:06:36,604 --> 00:06:39,482 I promise. I swear it by my reusable slushy cup. 160 00:06:39,482 --> 00:06:41,692 - (BOTH GASP) - Yeah, you heard me. 161 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:43,778 Ooh! Ow! 162 00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:45,905 - Brain freeze. - Here. Let me rub your head. 163 00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,031 - Thank you. - There you go. 164 00:06:47,031 --> 00:06:49,283 - It still hurts. - I know. Let me really rub it. 165 00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:50,910 - (GRUNTS) - Ahh! Hey. 166 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:52,578 - Really, really rub it. - Rudy! 167 00:06:52,578 --> 00:06:53,871 Rudy! 168 00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:00,336 Oh, God. It's all happening. 169 00:07:00,336 --> 00:07:02,672 Hold it together, Rudes. We're gonna handle this. 170 00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:04,674 I know you're saying words, but all I can hear 171 00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:07,760 is my dad's cocoon crunch, crunch, crunching under Paul's feet. 172 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:10,138 - That's Gene eating tortilla chips. - (CRUNCHING) Sorry. 173 00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:12,723 There he is. Good ball choice, son. 174 00:07:13,182 --> 00:07:15,101 Thanks. Yeah, I coordinated it with my shirt. 175 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,227 Well, I noticed. 176 00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:18,980 - Hey, kids. - Kids, meet shoes. Shoes, meet kids. 177 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:21,232 - Oh. Hi. - PAUL: Hey. There they are. 178 00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:23,776 - And here we are. - Are you ready to roll? 179 00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:25,862 'Cause it's bowling. 180 00:07:26,362 --> 00:07:29,323 - Oh. Yeah. - The balls are round, so they roll. 181 00:07:29,323 --> 00:07:31,367 - (CHUCKLES) Yeah. - (SIGHS) Oh, man. 182 00:07:31,367 --> 00:07:34,829 Lame but somehow charming puns? That's my dad's territory. 183 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,081 Know what? I'm gonna pop over to the men's room. 184 00:07:37,081 --> 00:07:40,042 I got a birthday bladder, AKA too many fizzy waters. 185 00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:42,211 - Don't start without me. - Okay, let's move. 186 00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,255 I'm gonna go stall Paul so he can't bowl, 187 00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:47,175 and I'll just keep that going until the party's over. 188 00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,259 - Tina. - Yeah. 189 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:51,429 Go to the cumin lady from Indian cooking class. Make it happen. 190 00:07:51,554 --> 00:07:55,057 It would be nice if Sylvester had a new girlfriend in, like, 20 minutes. 191 00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:57,059 - (NERVOUSLY) Uh... - Perfect. Gene. 192 00:07:57,059 --> 00:07:58,561 Slushy duty. Got it. 193 00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:00,980 No. Go with Rudy, follow Sylvester to the bathroom 194 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:03,608 and pluck those eyebrows with extreme prejudice. 195 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,859 - On it. - Wait, Rudy. 196 00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:06,777 What's Paul's deal again? What's he do? 197 00:08:06,777 --> 00:08:08,779 He's an occupational therapist. 198 00:08:08,779 --> 00:08:10,990 If people have pain that makes it difficult to do things, 199 00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:13,284 he helps them with exercises or advice. 200 00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:14,785 As if we couldn't hate him any more. 201 00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:17,038 - I know. - Okay. Everybody break. 202 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,206 - Go. Go. - Okay, okay. 203 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,457 - Okay. - Dad. 204 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:20,583 - Hey, Dad. - Yeah. What? 205 00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:21,667 - Dad. - Yeah. What is it? 206 00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:25,755 I just learned that Paul here is an occupational therapist. 207 00:08:25,755 --> 00:08:29,133 - Uh, yeah. Yes, I am. - My dad needs that. Lots of it. 208 00:08:29,133 --> 00:08:31,636 - I do? - Oh. Are certain motions painful? 209 00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:34,555 - I mean, yeah. - Which ones? 210 00:08:34,555 --> 00:08:36,098 - Um, all of them. - See what I mean? 211 00:08:36,098 --> 00:08:37,225 Oh. 212 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,643 {\an8}Hi. 213 00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:42,605 {\an8}- Hi. - Having some popcorn? Cool. Cool. Cool. 214 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:44,732 {\an8}Phew! Birthdays. Am I right? 215 00:08:44,732 --> 00:08:46,192 Stand up. Let me look. 216 00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:48,444 - Sure. (GRUNTS) - Little sound there. 217 00:08:48,444 --> 00:08:51,447 Uh, wait. Do you not make sounds when you stand up? 218 00:08:51,447 --> 00:08:52,990 Let's see you touch your toes. 219 00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:55,159 - Touch, like, touch? - Give it a shot. 220 00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,995 - (GROANS) Oh, my God. - (WHISTLES) Yeah. 221 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:02,917 - You whistled twice. Is that bad? - Yeah. It's a two-whistler. 222 00:09:03,042 --> 00:09:04,085 - Yep. - Oh, God. 223 00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:05,461 Ow! Ow! 224 00:09:05,461 --> 00:09:07,296 It's worth it, Dad. I'm sorry. I love you. 225 00:09:07,296 --> 00:09:10,216 The hair is fighting back. It wants to live! 226 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:13,678 - I'm gonna kill it. - Don't let it into your mind! 227 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:16,597 - Kids. Ow! - It knows what you're afraid of. 228 00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:18,516 It seems like you guys have great chemistry. 229 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:21,727 He's learning to cook Indian food. You're learning to cook Indian food. 230 00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:25,022 Maybe it's time to take it to the next level and move in together. 231 00:09:25,022 --> 00:09:26,399 I'm sorry. Who are you? 232 00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:30,444 So your right shoulder is about two inches higher than your left. 233 00:09:30,444 --> 00:09:32,572 - It is? - Yes. That's even. 234 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,908 - (GROANS) - Does that hurt? It's not supposed to. 235 00:09:35,908 --> 00:09:39,287 I mean, so this is normal? This is how standing is? 236 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,039 - I'm afraid so. - Okay, let's bowl. 237 00:09:42,039 --> 00:09:45,585 - I am very ready. - Yeah. Here. I'll give you my card. 238 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,087 No, no, no. Don't bowl. He needs help now. 239 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:51,549 He's got so many problems. I can't believe he's survived this long. 240 00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:54,760 It's okay, Louise. I'll be fine, I think. 241 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:58,764 - (SIGHS) Crap. - Here we go. My dad's up first. 242 00:09:58,889 --> 00:10:02,435 Go, me. It's my birthday and I'm bowling. 243 00:10:04,061 --> 00:10:06,480 - Oof. - Hey, it's just his first roll. 244 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:09,108 - Tina, how'd it go? - Sherry wants to move slow. 245 00:10:09,525 --> 00:10:11,902 I guess she thinks asking Sylvester to be her boyfriend 246 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:15,114 after they've gone on no dates is "very confusing." 247 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,824 - Ridiculous. - Oh, God. 248 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:19,744 Well, hey, three pins are better than nothing. 249 00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:20,828 Yeah. 250 00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:22,830 The intimidation factor is already there. 251 00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:26,000 Paul's gonna bowl the pants off my dad at his own birthday party. 252 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,585 Beautifully-pleated pants. 253 00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:30,046 And those eyebrows are bringing the razzle dazzle. 254 00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,422 I can't watch. 255 00:10:31,422 --> 00:10:33,799 Maybe I'll bail and go drown my sorrows in slushy. 256 00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,551 - I'm in. - I can slush. Louise? 257 00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:36,677 Uh... 258 00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:41,223 Huh. What if we... Guys, come with me. I have an idea. 259 00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:44,018 - Come with you where? - Anywhere but here is good. 260 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,478 - Hey, bud. - Your turn. 261 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,105 Go on without me. We're doing kid stuff. 262 00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:51,275 Not that I'm not totally comfortable with everything going on here 263 00:10:51,275 --> 00:10:53,277 in this area of the bowling alley, so... 264 00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:54,945 Um... Okay, bye. 265 00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:58,240 - What are we doing? - Also a question I was going to ask. 266 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,826 We're doing what it takes to give your dad an amazing night. 267 00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:04,747 Are we getting him a gift from what I think is an extension cord museum? 268 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,916 - (ALL GASP) - You kids aren't allowed back here. 269 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,127 Right, right. So sorry for whatever this is we're doing. 270 00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,338 I was thinking this didn't look like a bathroom. 271 00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:13,673 Okay. Get out now. 272 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:15,716 - Wait. Please. - What? 273 00:11:15,716 --> 00:11:18,469 - This is Rudy. Rudy, say hi. - Hello. I'm Rudy. 274 00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:19,845 And it's his dad's birthday, 275 00:11:19,845 --> 00:11:24,058 and his dad's about to bowl against Paul, who's his mom's new boyfriend. 276 00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:25,518 And Paul's good at everything. 277 00:11:25,643 --> 00:11:28,562 And he's gonna kick Rudy's dad's butt, and he's gonna look like... 278 00:11:28,729 --> 00:11:31,440 Like, what were you saying? Like a dead caterpillar or something? 279 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:34,318 Yeah, he's gonna look like an unrealized butterfly. 280 00:11:34,318 --> 00:11:38,698 Yeah. So we just wanna help him win. You know, from back here somehow. 281 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:42,159 I mean, it would be a lot like cheating, but it would be for charity. 282 00:11:42,284 --> 00:11:46,247 So, yeah. It's fine. We'll figure out something else. 283 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:47,540 I love it. 284 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,458 - Huh? What? - I've got a Paul. 285 00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:54,338 But my Paul is named Penny and she makes my dad very happy. 286 00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:57,299 - How dare she? - Okay. We're cheating. 287 00:11:57,299 --> 00:11:59,969 - We are? - Yeah, Tina, we are. 288 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,887 - You're going down, Penny. - Paul. 289 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,639 - Uh-uh. - No, it's important. 290 00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:10,020 LOUISE: Lane check. Rudy's dad and Paul are playing on this lane right now. 291 00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:12,565 And last we saw, my dad was bowling like ass. 292 00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:13,733 Sorry. I said ass. 293 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:16,485 So we've got to make this cheating stuff happen soon. 294 00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:20,030 I feel like helping Sylvester by cheating is maybe not the best idea. 295 00:12:20,239 --> 00:12:21,782 And also just cheating in general. 296 00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:24,577 Tina, Rudy is our friend, and if our friend wants his dad 297 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,704 to bowl an amazing game and teach Paul a lesson 298 00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:29,665 he will never freaking forget, that's what we're gonna do. 299 00:12:29,665 --> 00:12:30,875 - Thank you. - Yeah. 300 00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,502 How is this gonna work? Sorry. I didn't catch your name. 301 00:12:33,502 --> 00:12:35,880 No names. The less we know about each other, the better. 302 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,131 It's on your nametag. 303 00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:38,257 - Rachel. - Crap. 304 00:12:38,257 --> 00:12:41,427 Okay. I have an idea of how we can do this, but I haven't tried it before. 305 00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:42,928 And it's risky. 306 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:46,056 When your dad's ball hits the pins, there's just enough clearance 307 00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,684 over the backstop for us to toss an extra pin in there. 308 00:12:48,684 --> 00:12:52,521 And if we hit them just right, then it's nothing but strikes. 309 00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:53,814 Fantastic. 310 00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:57,234 - Oh. Gutter ball. - Please don't let it be Spare-ticus. 311 00:12:57,234 --> 00:13:00,488 Argh! They look good, but they don't actually help me bowl better. 312 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:02,448 - You're lucky you're hot. - You talking to me? 313 00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,033 - Yeah, you too. - I know. 314 00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:06,660 Okay. I need two kids. One to grab the pin 315 00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:08,454 before it gets swept into the pin elevator 316 00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:10,956 and one to hold on to the person grabbing the pin 317 00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:12,541 so they don't fall into the machine. 318 00:13:12,541 --> 00:13:14,001 Sounds dangerous. 319 00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:16,086 Pin-setting used to be done by child laborers, 320 00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:18,339 so I'm sure that means it's perfectly safe. 321 00:13:18,339 --> 00:13:20,007 We can't see anything from back here. 322 00:13:20,007 --> 00:13:21,926 How will we know when it's Rudy's dad's turn? 323 00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:23,219 Good point. We need eyes on the outside. 324 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,303 I'll do it. 325 00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:26,305 Gene, no offense, but if we send you out there, 326 00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,641 we're gonna find you face down at the slushy bar. 327 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:33,020 - And your point is? - I'll go. I would love to be not here. 328 00:13:33,020 --> 00:13:36,357 No. Your "I'm not doing anything bad" face is... 329 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:38,067 Let's just say it. Really bad. 330 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:41,445 - Oh. Well, what about... (WHIMPERS) - Ugh. I'll go. 331 00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:43,280 Be sneaky. Peek at the scoreboard, 332 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:45,533 memorize the bowling order, and report back. 333 00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:46,951 Sneak and a peek. Got it. 334 00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,292 Oof. Sylvester's losing pretty bad. 335 00:13:55,292 --> 00:13:58,420 But we still have, like, half a game left to turn it around. 336 00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:01,048 {\an8}Whoa. Mom and Dad are not bringing it. 337 00:14:01,048 --> 00:14:03,634 - BOB: Hey, Louise. - Ugh. They spotted me. 338 00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:06,262 Hey, Dad, Mom. Rough game. 339 00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:09,765 I'm beginning to think that as athletes, you guys are kind of not elite. 340 00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:11,934 Yeah. We're bad at this. 341 00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:15,729 Oh! Did you say I love you when we were at a sports game of some kind? 342 00:14:15,729 --> 00:14:18,566 No. But one time you threw up on me at a baseball game. 343 00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:20,526 - Yeah, but lovingly. - Yeah. Kinda. 344 00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:21,652 Lot of peanuts. 345 00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:24,029 Check out Paul with the big blue ball. 346 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:27,116 Okay. So Sylvester's up after Paul. 347 00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:29,618 Hmm. You can totally see Rachel's elbow right now, 348 00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:32,037 and I think Gene's knees for some reason. 349 00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:36,083 It's fine. It's fine. These lanes are so long and adult eyesight is so bad. 350 00:14:38,627 --> 00:14:40,588 Oh! Bananas. It's a split. 351 00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:43,424 You're still way ahead of me. It's gonna be hard to catch you. 352 00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:45,301 That's a good pun, though. Banana split. 353 00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:48,762 - Oh! I didn't realize I did that. - Really? (CHUCKLES) 354 00:14:49,013 --> 00:14:50,264 Better get back there. 355 00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:51,473 - Huh. - What? 356 00:14:51,473 --> 00:14:53,893 - You're not doing it again, are you? - Doing what? 357 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,270 Letting someone win. I've been watching you. 358 00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:59,148 You haven't been doing that spinny thing with your wrist you usually do. 359 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:02,526 My trademark spinderella? I don't know what you're talking about. 360 00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:05,195 Yeah, you do. Did you pluck your eyebrow hair? 361 00:15:05,195 --> 00:15:07,448 - Gene and Rudy pulled it out of my face. - Oh! 362 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,241 And it was long. 363 00:15:09,241 --> 00:15:11,911 Wait. Why would he let Paul win? 364 00:15:12,536 --> 00:15:13,746 Oh, boy. 365 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:15,581 (GRUNTS) 366 00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:18,000 Are we a go? Is Sylvester up? 367 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:21,003 He's next. But we might need to call off the plan, like, right now. 368 00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:22,713 - What? Why? - We don't need it. 369 00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:26,425 I don't think... I'm pretty sure Sylvester is letting Paul win. 370 00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:29,637 - What did you say, Louise? - Your dad is letting Paul win. 371 00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:31,347 Huh? But why? 372 00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:33,641 I say we're still doing the plan. Paul has this coming. 373 00:15:33,641 --> 00:15:38,103 Penny has this coming, always fostering shelter dogs, asking about my day, 374 00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:40,689 making Christmas magical. You're not my mom, Penny. 375 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:41,815 She sounds like a monster. 376 00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:42,900 She is. 377 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,360 Louise, this is happening. 378 00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,111 - No, wait. - I'm closing the door now. 379 00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:47,488 - Watch your fingers. - What? No. 380 00:15:47,488 --> 00:15:50,574 - RUDY: She said watch your fingers. - Son of a bowling ball. 381 00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:57,957 Rudy. Gene. Tina. Come on. Someone, open up. 382 00:15:57,957 --> 00:16:00,751 Everyone in position. Ignore the pounding and the yelling 383 00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:02,878 and any dumb voices inside of you that are like, 384 00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:04,838 "This is wrong. I shouldn't do this." (MUMBLES) 385 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:07,675 - Tina, what should we do? - Uh... 386 00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:10,427 - Okay, great. - Stay strong. That's what you should do. 387 00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:13,681 Okay. Not good. Not good. Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap. 388 00:16:14,723 --> 00:16:15,808 Whoa! 389 00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:17,476 - Street shoes. - LOUISE: Sorry. 390 00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:19,478 - Louise? - What the heck are you doing? 391 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:23,148 Well, I dropped a nickel over here, and I gotta get it. 392 00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:25,150 - You dropped a nickel? - Yes. 393 00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,528 Louise, we're poor, but we're not that poor. 394 00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:31,740 - I can get you another nickel, I think. - One second. Sorry. Sorry. 395 00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:33,826 You're still wearing shoes on the lane. 396 00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:35,744 I know. I know. Just one second. 397 00:16:35,744 --> 00:16:37,162 SYLVESTER: Lane integrity is important. 398 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,081 Rudy. Rudy, can you hear me in there? 399 00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:41,458 - Buddy. - Don't try and change my mind, Louise. 400 00:16:41,458 --> 00:16:44,461 Are you standing on the lanes? That's pretty frowned upon. 401 00:16:44,628 --> 00:16:47,840 Listen. We don't have to do this. Your dad doesn't need our help. 402 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,800 There's a good chance he's throwing the game 403 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,886 because he's a nice guy who's really good at bowling 404 00:16:52,886 --> 00:16:56,849 but doesn't want to make his ex-wife's new boyfriend look bad, or something. 405 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:59,059 And doing this plan could ruin everything. 406 00:16:59,059 --> 00:17:02,312 And I'm pretty sure our hands would get mangled by this machine. 407 00:17:02,312 --> 00:17:03,689 But the dad stuff too. 408 00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:06,066 Also, if you get caught, which I'm gonna tell you 409 00:17:06,066 --> 00:17:08,986 with some outside knowledge is not not a possibility... 410 00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:11,613 And me being here right now isn't helpful. Sorry. 411 00:17:11,613 --> 00:17:15,034 Anyway, if you get caught cheating, it'll make it weird with you and Paul. 412 00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:17,453 It'll make it weird with Paul and your dad. 413 00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:18,829 It'll make everything weird. 414 00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:20,831 Don't listen to her. We've got to do this. 415 00:17:21,248 --> 00:17:24,293 Stuff actually seems pretty okay between Sylvester and Paul. 416 00:17:24,293 --> 00:17:27,755 I'm realizing the person who doesn't seem okay is you. 417 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,673 - Me? - No. Rudy. 418 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,091 - Oh. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. 419 00:17:31,091 --> 00:17:33,802 MAN: Child in lane 10, talking to the pins. 420 00:17:33,802 --> 00:17:36,597 Clear the lane, please. That's not how bowling works. 421 00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:37,681 Just a minute! 422 00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:40,893 Rudy, listen. 'Cause they're about to put me in bowling jail. 423 00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:44,521 It's possible you just needed a friend to talk to 424 00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:48,901 and not a genius to make a slightly complicated cheating plan. 425 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:50,027 - BOB: Louise? - Yeah? 426 00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:52,738 It would be a cool birthday present to Sylvester 427 00:17:52,738 --> 00:17:55,532 if you stop doing that in the middle of his game. 428 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:58,911 Also, we forgot to get you a birthday present. Just remembering now. 429 00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:00,079 Whoops. 430 00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,457 (SIGHS) Fine. Well, here comes the strike. 431 00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:15,594 - Huh. - Not bad. 432 00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:17,096 Hey. 433 00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,973 So, you're not gonna do the cheating thing? 434 00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:21,850 I don't want to say it was my nervous farts 435 00:18:21,850 --> 00:18:24,645 that convinced them to leave that back room, but maybe. 436 00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:26,688 I mean, the farts were possibly a factor. 437 00:18:26,688 --> 00:18:29,942 I think I'm gonna go call Penny and apologize for my text. 438 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,944 I mean, it wasn't actually any words, 439 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:34,947 just a GIF of an orangutan giving the middle finger. 440 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:36,573 But still, I feel bad. 441 00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:38,408 - It's a solid GIF, though. - Yeah. 442 00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:40,828 LOUISE: (SIGHS) Bye, shoes. 443 00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:43,872 {\an8}You weren't good bowling shoes, but you made me feel beautiful. 444 00:18:44,081 --> 00:18:46,250 Do you need more time, or can we... 445 00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:48,418 No, we're good. Are we good? 446 00:18:48,418 --> 00:18:50,003 There you go. And then it's done. 447 00:18:50,504 --> 00:18:52,089 Well, that was fun. Huh? 448 00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:55,676 - Dad, did you let Paul win? - What? No. 449 00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:57,094 Okay, fine. 450 00:18:57,094 --> 00:19:00,848 Hey. The whole macho "must beat ex-wife's new boyfriend at sports" thing 451 00:19:00,848 --> 00:19:02,391 it's just not me. 452 00:19:02,516 --> 00:19:04,893 Plus, he's not my competition, you know? 453 00:19:04,893 --> 00:19:07,980 He's part of your mom's life now and your life and mine. 454 00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,106 Yeah. 455 00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:11,525 But it doesn't change anything about you and me. 456 00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:15,320 I'll always be your dad, and you'll always be my rad son. 457 00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:17,072 My rad son, Rudy. 458 00:19:17,072 --> 00:19:18,365 - I know. - I rhymed it. 459 00:19:18,490 --> 00:19:20,576 I just want you to be okay, Dad. 460 00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:24,246 I am okay. Sure, this is not how I thought our marriage would turn out, 461 00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:26,957 but I've got great friends and a great therapist. 462 00:19:26,957 --> 00:19:30,627 And there are wonderful shows on TV now, Rudy. Wonderful. 463 00:19:30,627 --> 00:19:33,505 - I haven't even started The Crown. - I hear it's very nuanced. 464 00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:37,676 Hey. Don't underestimate your old dad. I've got a lot of life ahead of me. 465 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:40,470 - Hey, Sylvester. - Hey, Sherry. 466 00:19:40,470 --> 00:19:43,348 I'm heading out. Sorry we barely got to talk tonight. 467 00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:47,519 - At least, not directly. - Yeah. Well, see you in class. 468 00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:50,022 Hey, I hear we're cooking chicken vindaloo next week. 469 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:53,775 Yup. I'm vinda-looking forward to seeing you there. 470 00:19:53,775 --> 00:19:56,278 - (BOTH CHUCKLE) - Vinda-you too. 471 00:19:58,280 --> 00:19:59,573 - Whoa! - Yeah. 472 00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:01,158 Oh, my God. Did you see that? 473 00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:03,619 Big time. That girl talked to you. 474 00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:06,538 GENE: Last people to leave the party. 475 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:07,623 TINA: We just keep getting cooler. 476 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:08,707 - Amen. - Hey, Dad. 477 00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:11,251 Did you ever figure out where Mom first said I love you? 478 00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:12,920 No. And thank you for bringing it up, Tina. 479 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,046 You're welcome. 480 00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:17,466 Lin, I'm sorry I can't remember that really nice important thing. 481 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:20,177 Bob, I told you, it's fine. Here's the story. 482 00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:21,261 We were by the beach 483 00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:24,556 and a seagull pooped in my hair and we didn't have any napkins, 484 00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:27,601 and so you just used your shirt and I said it. 485 00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:29,186 Then you said, "That's a lot of poop." 486 00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,312 Aw! 487 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:33,065 - Now you remember? - Yeah. How did I not remember that? 488 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:36,151 Haven't we all wiped seagull poop off Mom at some point in our lives? 489 00:20:36,151 --> 00:20:39,238 You'll just say I love you to anyone who wipes poop off you. 490 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:40,405 TINA: That's how you know. 491 00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:44,576 Middle-aged bowling party MIddle-aged bowling party 492 00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:48,455 MIddle-aged bowling party Ain't too old to roll 493 00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:53,210 Middle-aged bowling party MIddle-aged bowling party 494 00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:56,630 MIddle-aged bowling party Ain't too old to roll 495 00:20:56,630 --> 00:20:58,757 First frame It's a low impact game 496 00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:00,759 Second frame Ooh, back pain 497 00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:02,844 Third frame Joints feel enflamed 498 00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:04,471 Ah 499 00:21:04,596 --> 00:21:08,809 Middle-aged bowling party MIddle-aged bowling party 500 00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:12,020 {\an8}MIddle-aged bowling party Ain't too old to roll