1 00:00:00,670 --> 00:00:02,430 Don't know where the fuck you were last week, 2 00:00:02,438 --> 00:00:04,106 but here's what you missed on Shameless. 3 00:00:04,141 --> 00:00:05,812 They're digging out the sewer main in a few days 4 00:00:05,846 --> 00:00:06,848 and shutting the water off. 5 00:00:06,882 --> 00:00:08,183 What about Aunt Ginger? 6 00:00:08,217 --> 00:00:09,785 Let me spell this out for you. 7 00:00:09,819 --> 00:00:11,585 The city digs up some bones, the police show up. 8 00:00:11,619 --> 00:00:14,990 You buried a body and you stole from the Federal Government. 9 00:00:15,025 --> 00:00:17,294 You will never get out of prison. 10 00:00:17,329 --> 00:00:19,096 "My dad is gay for your brother" thing, 11 00:00:19,131 --> 00:00:21,332 it's, like, on film loop in my brain. 12 00:00:21,366 --> 00:00:23,100 I'll be back for dinner. Buck up, kiddo. 13 00:00:23,135 --> 00:00:25,701 No biggie, just my universe falling apart. 14 00:00:25,735 --> 00:00:28,804 We are literally digging up a body. 15 00:00:28,839 --> 00:00:30,539 Walk away. 16 00:00:30,574 --> 00:00:33,108 Yeah, why don't you go cry to your gay dad about it? 17 00:00:33,143 --> 00:00:34,877 Hey, what did the doc say this morning? 18 00:00:34,911 --> 00:00:37,045 I need to know the truth. Can I have a damn baby or not? 19 00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,548 What about a surrogate? 20 00:00:38,582 --> 00:00:39,617 You two take it from me when it comes out. 21 00:00:39,651 --> 00:00:41,219 Yes, mama. 22 00:00:41,253 --> 00:00:42,988 It will be our child. It will be your grandchild. 23 00:00:43,023 --> 00:00:44,223 You know the guy you beat the shit out of? 24 00:00:44,257 --> 00:00:45,790 He wants me to sneak into his mansion 25 00:00:45,824 --> 00:00:47,558 and take all of his crap. 26 00:00:47,593 --> 00:00:48,726 Don't know what you see in that geriatric viagroid. 27 00:00:48,761 --> 00:00:50,596 He isn't afraid to kiss me. 28 00:00:51,831 --> 00:00:52,830 I can take care of you at home. 29 00:00:52,865 --> 00:00:54,199 No, you can't. 30 00:00:54,233 --> 00:00:55,400 Get in the car. Debbie, get in the car. 31 00:00:55,434 --> 00:00:58,670 I love you, Debbie! 32 00:00:58,704 --> 00:01:03,142 Operator, can you connect me with Child Welfare Services? 33 00:01:03,177 --> 00:01:06,513 I would like to report a negligent situation. 34 00:01:06,547 --> 00:01:08,214 Who the hell are you? 35 00:01:08,249 --> 00:01:10,369 I'm Britney Sturgess from Child Protective Services. 36 00:01:12,394 --> 00:01:16,863 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 37 00:01:17,790 --> 00:01:20,757 [High Strung's The Luck You Got] 38 00:01:20,791 --> 00:01:24,761 ♪ ♪ 39 00:01:24,796 --> 00:01:28,032 ♪ Think of all the luck you got ♪ 40 00:01:28,066 --> 00:01:31,102 ♪ know that it's not for naught ♪ 41 00:01:31,136 --> 00:01:34,372 ♪ You were beaming once before ♪ 42 00:01:34,406 --> 00:01:38,876 ♪ but it's not like that anymore ♪ 43 00:01:38,911 --> 00:01:42,113 ♪ What is this downside ♪ 44 00:01:42,147 --> 00:01:45,617 ♪ that you speak of? ♪ 45 00:01:45,651 --> 00:01:47,619 ♪ What is this feeling ♪ 46 00:01:47,653 --> 00:01:52,090 ♪ you're so sure of? ♪ 47 00:01:52,124 --> 00:01:59,031 ♪ ♪ 48 00:01:59,065 --> 00:02:02,268 ♪ Round up the friends you got ♪ 49 00:02:02,302 --> 00:02:05,538 ♪ know that they're not for naught ♪ 50 00:02:05,572 --> 00:02:08,609 ♪ You were willing once before ♪ 51 00:02:08,643 --> 00:02:13,380 ♪ but it's not like that anymore ♪ 52 00:02:13,415 --> 00:02:16,417 ♪ What is this downside ♪ 53 00:02:16,452 --> 00:02:20,054 ♪ that you speak of? ♪ 54 00:02:20,088 --> 00:02:21,889 ♪ What is this feeling ♪ 55 00:02:21,924 --> 00:02:26,553 ♪ you're so sure of? ♪ 56 00:02:26,588 --> 00:02:29,546 [Train horn blaring] 57 00:02:29,580 --> 00:02:31,248 [Dog barking] 58 00:02:40,947 --> 00:02:43,276 Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Hey, what the hell's going on? 59 00:02:43,311 --> 00:02:45,040 Department of Family Services is taking us away. 60 00:02:45,074 --> 00:02:46,406 They what? Can they do that? 61 00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:47,538 It won't last, Debs. I promise. 62 00:02:47,572 --> 00:02:49,238 What was it last time? A week? 63 00:02:49,272 --> 00:02:50,739 Nine days. 64 00:02:50,774 --> 00:02:52,941 Aw, 20 bucks says we're back in five. 65 00:02:52,975 --> 00:02:54,895 Can I get their placement addresses from you now? 66 00:02:54,910 --> 00:02:58,779 Not until the intake interviews with the children are complete. 67 00:02:58,813 --> 00:03:01,248 Who reported us? 68 00:03:01,282 --> 00:03:03,748 [Engine starting] 69 00:03:03,782 --> 00:03:05,782 Come on! Who was it? 70 00:03:05,817 --> 00:03:07,916 [Sighs] 71 00:03:19,936 --> 00:03:20,960 Frank. 72 00:03:20,994 --> 00:03:21,986 [Footsteps approaching] 73 00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:25,465 Frank. Frank. 74 00:03:25,499 --> 00:03:27,585 Frank. 75 00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,791 I'm off to my hypnotherapy appointment. 76 00:03:29,825 --> 00:03:31,649 I need you to watch Hiram. 77 00:03:31,676 --> 00:03:33,369 I'm kind of in the middle of something here, Sheils. 78 00:03:33,403 --> 00:03:34,790 Where's Jody? 79 00:03:34,824 --> 00:03:36,584 He's working at the tattoo parlor. 80 00:03:36,619 --> 00:03:38,866 Marking idiots with ink so the rest of us can recognize them. 81 00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:42,515 Frank, you have tattoos. 82 00:03:42,549 --> 00:03:44,134 Point well taken. 83 00:03:44,169 --> 00:03:46,317 So-- and if you're doing laundry, 84 00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:49,329 can you put some of Hymie's onesie's in? 85 00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:52,939 Might as well. You're both covered in pee-pee. 86 00:03:52,974 --> 00:03:56,550 [Hushed laughter] 87 00:03:56,584 --> 00:03:58,938 [Shushes] 88 00:04:02,389 --> 00:04:04,670 There you go, buddy. 89 00:04:06,959 --> 00:04:08,353 I just want you to know that 90 00:04:08,388 --> 00:04:12,198 my dumping you and leaving town... 91 00:04:12,232 --> 00:04:15,840 is in no way a reflection of my feelings toward you, Hiram. 92 00:04:15,875 --> 00:04:18,029 I just gotta lay low a little bit 93 00:04:18,064 --> 00:04:21,606 in case they find Ginger's body in my backyard. 94 00:04:24,590 --> 00:04:27,305 [Exhales] 95 00:04:27,339 --> 00:04:28,333 [Sighs] 96 00:04:28,367 --> 00:04:31,222 [Plates clattering] 97 00:04:31,556 --> 00:04:34,338 Oh, shit! I got a shift in ten minutes. 98 00:04:34,373 --> 00:04:37,881 Yeah, go to your shift. I'll take care of this. 99 00:04:37,916 --> 00:04:39,237 I wasn't sure I'd see you again. 100 00:04:39,243 --> 00:04:42,258 Yeah. I wasn't either. 101 00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:48,323 I'm gonna see if I can get one of the evil cock gobblers 102 00:04:48,358 --> 00:04:50,939 to cover my shift so I can get over to the DFS 103 00:04:50,973 --> 00:04:53,061 and start tracking down the kids. 104 00:04:57,139 --> 00:04:58,099 You guys okay? 105 00:04:58,133 --> 00:04:59,494 Oh, yeah. 106 00:04:59,528 --> 00:05:01,248 Ain't our first time at the rodeo. 107 00:05:01,283 --> 00:05:02,836 'Cause Liam's still cute and little... 108 00:05:02,871 --> 00:05:04,398 [Babbling] 109 00:05:04,432 --> 00:05:05,886 He'll go to some loving home with people 110 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,108 who really want a family, but waited so long 111 00:05:08,143 --> 00:05:09,830 their egg batter rotted so they can't have one of their own. 112 00:05:09,864 --> 00:05:12,319 And Debbie can Carl will be placed together because... 113 00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:15,569 Because the State always tries to keep siblings together. 114 00:05:15,596 --> 00:05:17,651 And Lip and I can handle whatever foster nut jobs 115 00:05:17,686 --> 00:05:18,913 we end up with. 116 00:05:18,947 --> 00:05:20,540 Remember that last guy with the, uh... 117 00:05:20,569 --> 00:05:22,129 was it the fucking bathroom peephole? 118 00:05:22,163 --> 00:05:23,784 Oh, yeah. 119 00:05:23,818 --> 00:05:25,079 Well, this time's gonna be a little different. 120 00:05:25,113 --> 00:05:27,894 I've placed Liam and Carl together, 121 00:05:27,929 --> 00:05:32,238 but Debbie unfortunately has to be placed separately. 122 00:05:32,273 --> 00:05:36,809 All by myself? 123 00:05:36,844 --> 00:05:39,426 And, Philip and Ian, you're too old to be placed, 124 00:05:39,460 --> 00:05:41,647 so you're going to a group home. 125 00:05:52,225 --> 00:05:55,073 Like a whore's period. Late again, bitch. 126 00:05:55,107 --> 00:05:56,327 You're wasting your talents, Patty. 127 00:05:56,362 --> 00:05:59,310 You should be tweeting this crap. 128 00:05:59,345 --> 00:06:00,838 [Knocks on door] 129 00:06:00,873 --> 00:06:02,693 You're late. 130 00:06:02,728 --> 00:06:04,054 I know. I'm sorry. 131 00:06:04,089 --> 00:06:06,437 Look, I kind of have a family emergency 132 00:06:06,471 --> 00:06:09,520 and was wondering if I could skip my shift today? 133 00:06:09,555 --> 00:06:12,904 Would you look at this? It's filthy. 134 00:06:12,938 --> 00:06:16,213 My back is filthy. 'Cause you haven't washed it. 135 00:06:16,547 --> 00:06:19,069 So why should I wash yours? 136 00:06:19,103 --> 00:06:20,490 Look, I just need a couple hours 137 00:06:20,525 --> 00:06:22,252 to get to the Department of Family Services. 138 00:06:22,287 --> 00:06:24,008 They yanked my brothers and sister from our house 139 00:06:24,042 --> 00:06:25,664 this morning, and I just gotta 140 00:06:25,698 --> 00:06:27,063 find out where they are and make sure they're safe 141 00:06:27,097 --> 00:06:30,843 and not with any psychos or anything, please. 142 00:06:30,878 --> 00:06:34,522 Sorry, but if you can't get anyone to cover your shift... 143 00:06:34,556 --> 00:06:36,611 You know as well as I do none of these bitches 144 00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:39,498 are gonna cover for me. 145 00:06:39,533 --> 00:06:42,058 I still have that video of you and I have no problem 146 00:06:42,093 --> 00:06:43,784 sending it to your wife. 147 00:06:43,819 --> 00:06:45,543 Yeah, and I have no problem going to DFS to tell them 148 00:06:45,577 --> 00:06:47,433 you steal from the register and show up high every day. 149 00:06:47,468 --> 00:06:48,728 Your word against mine. 150 00:06:48,762 --> 00:06:51,711 Actually, the girls will back me up. 151 00:06:51,746 --> 00:06:53,240 And I'm gonna want you to quit 152 00:06:53,273 --> 00:06:56,256 so I don't have to pay you unemployment. 153 00:06:56,284 --> 00:06:58,245 Fuck you, Bobby. 154 00:06:58,273 --> 00:07:00,628 Tell you what, you, uh, tickle the balls a little bit 155 00:07:00,662 --> 00:07:03,085 and maybe I'll write you a letter of recommendation. 156 00:07:11,146 --> 00:07:12,786 It really puts the "home" in "group home." 157 00:07:12,802 --> 00:07:16,169 [Baby babbling] 158 00:07:16,203 --> 00:07:20,416 [Dog barking in distance] 159 00:07:23,154 --> 00:07:25,924 It's only gonna be a couple days, okay? 160 00:07:25,959 --> 00:07:28,766 Every Gallagher can handle that, right? 161 00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:33,042 - I'll take care of Liam. - Yes, you will. 162 00:07:37,315 --> 00:07:38,716 Hey, Debs. 163 00:07:42,488 --> 00:07:43,624 See you soon, all right? 164 00:07:43,658 --> 00:07:47,704 Hey. 165 00:07:47,738 --> 00:07:49,372 Good day, gentlemen. 166 00:07:49,407 --> 00:07:51,308 My name is d'Andre and this is Gunderson House, 167 00:07:51,342 --> 00:07:54,378 a Level 14 boys group home housing underage D&Ds 168 00:07:54,412 --> 00:07:55,746 in the Chicago system. 169 00:07:55,780 --> 00:07:58,916 Is that "Dungeons and Dragons"? 170 00:07:58,950 --> 00:08:02,085 "Delinquents and deviants." Follow me. 171 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:04,321 This will be your primary residence until we figure out 172 00:08:04,355 --> 00:08:05,856 which one you are. 173 00:08:05,890 --> 00:08:07,691 Your wallets and cell phones will be in my care 174 00:08:07,725 --> 00:08:12,162 until you've proven to me that you can follow the rules. 175 00:08:12,196 --> 00:08:15,432 - So it's like prison? - It's up to you. 176 00:08:15,466 --> 00:08:18,201 You will be given an opportunity to earn back your money 177 00:08:18,236 --> 00:08:19,703 and your cell phone privileges. 178 00:08:19,737 --> 00:08:21,271 Gee, thanks. 179 00:08:21,305 --> 00:08:22,605 You would do well to shut your mouth 180 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:27,610 and keep your eyes open in here. 181 00:08:27,644 --> 00:08:30,513 [Clears throat] 182 00:08:30,847 --> 00:08:32,881 The county database says that you're available for placement, 183 00:08:32,916 --> 00:08:37,352 but I'm concerned there are too many children in your care. 184 00:08:37,387 --> 00:08:38,553 I'm sure there's some kind of limit. 185 00:08:38,588 --> 00:08:40,155 [Kids talking indistinctly] 186 00:08:40,189 --> 00:08:41,756 These ain't cats, honey. They're kids. 187 00:08:41,791 --> 00:08:43,993 They need someone to take care of them. 188 00:08:44,027 --> 00:08:45,828 That's why the Good Lord put me here. 189 00:08:45,863 --> 00:08:49,733 So I can take in all his babies don't nobody else want. 190 00:08:49,767 --> 00:08:50,901 [Laughs] 191 00:08:50,935 --> 00:08:54,438 Come here, sweetheart. 192 00:08:54,473 --> 00:08:56,841 Come on, I'm not gonna bite you. 193 00:08:56,875 --> 00:08:58,276 [Laughs] 194 00:08:58,310 --> 00:09:01,012 You're a blessing. 195 00:09:01,046 --> 00:09:06,017 Mama Kamala is truly blessed to have you. 196 00:09:06,051 --> 00:09:09,387 Yup. 197 00:09:09,421 --> 00:09:13,524 It's only for a few days. I'll be okay. 198 00:09:13,558 --> 00:09:15,759 Um, this is my number. 199 00:09:15,794 --> 00:09:17,795 If you have any questions or, you know, if you just 200 00:09:17,829 --> 00:09:21,398 want to talk about anything, you can call me any time, okay? 201 00:09:23,635 --> 00:09:26,504 Okey-dokey. 202 00:09:29,174 --> 00:09:33,144 Bye-bye, now. 203 00:09:38,582 --> 00:09:39,814 Rule number one. 204 00:09:39,848 --> 00:09:41,314 No sitting on the good furniture. 205 00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:43,713 This is the good furniture? 206 00:09:43,748 --> 00:09:46,849 Rule number two. No sassing. You hear me? 207 00:09:48,852 --> 00:09:51,317 Let me look inside that bag. Give me that bag. 208 00:09:51,352 --> 00:09:54,418 Make sure you ain't got nothing in there to get you in trouble. 209 00:10:02,085 --> 00:10:03,651 Why are you standing there eyeballing me? 210 00:10:03,685 --> 00:10:06,119 Get busy minding them kids. 211 00:10:13,758 --> 00:10:15,558 Hi. I'm Debbie. 212 00:10:15,593 --> 00:10:17,260 Laronda. 213 00:10:17,294 --> 00:10:19,729 You ain't getting your bags back. 214 00:10:19,763 --> 00:10:21,630 I know. 215 00:10:21,664 --> 00:10:24,266 And what's your name? 216 00:10:24,300 --> 00:10:27,735 We want to be completely honest with you, Carl. 217 00:10:27,770 --> 00:10:30,070 We have been looking to adopt a bi-racial baby 218 00:10:30,105 --> 00:10:31,672 for quite some time. 219 00:10:31,706 --> 00:10:33,807 And when they called about Liam, we were over the moon. 220 00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:37,343 And then the State told us about you. 221 00:10:37,377 --> 00:10:39,611 And we want to try to keep you two together. 222 00:10:39,646 --> 00:10:42,281 So let's give this foursome a try. 223 00:10:42,315 --> 00:10:43,648 Which one are you again? 224 00:10:43,682 --> 00:10:45,817 I'm Cassius and this is Lanier. 225 00:10:45,851 --> 00:10:47,818 So you guys are gay? 226 00:10:47,853 --> 00:10:49,620 - Yup. - Yes. 227 00:10:49,655 --> 00:10:52,423 Does, like, shit ever get stuck on the tip of your dick? 228 00:10:52,457 --> 00:10:56,127 Yeah. 229 00:10:56,161 --> 00:10:57,561 Uh... 230 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:06,168 Gallagher? 231 00:11:09,606 --> 00:11:11,306 I was hoping to see Marilyn. 232 00:11:11,341 --> 00:11:13,575 She's been our caseworker the last couple of years. 233 00:11:13,609 --> 00:11:16,410 Well, the turnover rate in our field is quite high. 234 00:11:16,444 --> 00:11:20,247 It's really a wonder Marilyn lasted as long as she did. 235 00:11:20,281 --> 00:11:22,149 So how can I help you? 236 00:11:22,183 --> 00:11:23,917 You can give me the addresses where the kids were placed. 237 00:11:23,951 --> 00:11:26,452 I already told you, I can't give out any information 238 00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,621 about the case until the intakes are complete. 239 00:11:28,655 --> 00:11:30,756 Come on. Marilyn always used to give me the info, 240 00:11:30,790 --> 00:11:32,524 just so I can know they're okay, 241 00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:35,093 and can get them stuff, like books or clothes, 242 00:11:35,127 --> 00:11:37,094 or whatever. 243 00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:38,495 Well, that is a clear violation of policy 244 00:11:38,530 --> 00:11:40,097 on Marilyn's part. 245 00:11:40,131 --> 00:11:42,666 Hey. I know you think you're helping, 246 00:11:42,700 --> 00:11:44,180 but as someone who has been in and out 247 00:11:44,201 --> 00:11:45,502 of the system their whole life, 248 00:11:45,536 --> 00:11:48,104 I can tell you it's a nightmare. 249 00:11:48,138 --> 00:11:49,805 These kids have a big sister who loves them, 250 00:11:49,839 --> 00:11:51,940 and I just want to make sure they're okay. 251 00:11:51,975 --> 00:11:53,475 So give me something, Britney. 252 00:11:53,509 --> 00:11:55,710 I mean, break a goddamn rule. 253 00:11:58,013 --> 00:12:00,614 I can tell you that I placed two together 254 00:12:00,649 --> 00:12:03,717 in one foster home, and the girl in another. 255 00:12:03,751 --> 00:12:05,818 And the two older boys are in a group home. 256 00:12:05,853 --> 00:12:08,221 The one on Hester? 257 00:12:08,255 --> 00:12:10,990 No. They're in a Level 14 on Richmond. 258 00:12:14,194 --> 00:12:18,163 Thanks. 259 00:12:18,198 --> 00:12:21,233 Hey, if I can find one family willing to take in all the kids, 260 00:12:21,268 --> 00:12:24,570 could they be placed together? 261 00:12:24,604 --> 00:12:28,171 In theory, yes. 262 00:12:37,076 --> 00:12:39,744 - Stella been in yet? - What's with the bag? 263 00:12:39,778 --> 00:12:41,412 Uh, going fishing for a couple of days. 264 00:12:41,447 --> 00:12:43,013 I heard Stella's pulling a long haul 265 00:12:43,048 --> 00:12:44,214 up to northern Canada. 266 00:12:44,249 --> 00:12:45,749 Hoping to hitch a ride. 267 00:12:45,783 --> 00:12:48,151 Fishing? You gonna use your tiny dick as a worm? 268 00:12:48,185 --> 00:12:50,185 I've caught some big whales with this little worm, 269 00:12:50,220 --> 00:12:53,154 yourself included there, Moby. 270 00:12:53,188 --> 00:12:55,255 Hello, Stella. How are you, sunshine? 271 00:12:55,289 --> 00:12:59,659 - What the hell do you want? - Oh, you know, same as you. 272 00:12:59,693 --> 00:13:02,728 Free pussy and a life on the road. 273 00:13:02,763 --> 00:13:05,264 - Could I hitch a ride? - Where you headed? 274 00:13:05,298 --> 00:13:07,532 Anywhere but here. 275 00:13:07,567 --> 00:13:09,868 - Kill somebody? - No, no, no. 276 00:13:09,902 --> 00:13:13,071 But I did bury her. 277 00:13:13,106 --> 00:13:14,906 Could always use some company. 278 00:13:14,941 --> 00:13:16,041 I'll meet you here tomorrow morning 279 00:13:16,075 --> 00:13:17,575 before I pick up my load. 280 00:13:17,610 --> 00:13:18,910 A couple of boilermakers to take the edge off 281 00:13:18,944 --> 00:13:20,345 the long haul, huh? 282 00:13:20,379 --> 00:13:21,746 I don't drink before I drive. 283 00:13:21,780 --> 00:13:23,114 I end up ramming smart cars in the ass 284 00:13:23,148 --> 00:13:24,548 just for shits and giggles. 285 00:13:24,583 --> 00:13:28,018 [Laughter] 286 00:13:28,053 --> 00:13:29,953 [Camera buzzing] 287 00:13:29,988 --> 00:13:32,289 [Beep] 288 00:13:32,323 --> 00:13:34,024 - V? - Upstairs! 289 00:13:41,269 --> 00:13:42,771 Making a video for one of those 290 00:13:42,805 --> 00:13:44,874 do-it-yourself websites online. 291 00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:46,742 Pays 150 bucks. 292 00:13:46,776 --> 00:13:49,479 This one's on a high colonic. Next week I bleach my exit ramp. 293 00:13:49,513 --> 00:13:50,882 DFS took the kids this morning. 294 00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:52,651 Oh, shit. 295 00:13:52,685 --> 00:13:53,719 You think you and Kevin could talk to your foster caseworker 296 00:13:53,753 --> 00:13:55,455 about taking them in? 297 00:13:55,489 --> 00:13:56,824 - Five Gallaghers in my house? - Just for a couple days. 298 00:13:56,858 --> 00:13:58,427 A week, maximum. 299 00:13:58,461 --> 00:14:00,397 Lip and Ian got placed in a Level 14 group home. 300 00:14:00,432 --> 00:14:01,901 Level 14? 301 00:14:01,935 --> 00:14:03,804 For kids that light their parents on fire, 302 00:14:03,838 --> 00:14:05,939 or stab them in the face while they're napping on the couch. 303 00:14:05,973 --> 00:14:07,273 Well, you're over 21 now. 304 00:14:07,308 --> 00:14:08,708 Can't they just release them to you? 305 00:14:08,709 --> 00:14:10,243 I'd have to file for guardianship. 306 00:14:10,278 --> 00:14:11,912 [Groans] Five Gallaghers. 307 00:14:11,947 --> 00:14:16,149 I'm gonna be the lone black dot on a map of Ireland. 308 00:14:16,183 --> 00:14:19,152 [Hip-hop music playing] 309 00:14:19,186 --> 00:14:25,791 ♪ ♪ 310 00:14:25,826 --> 00:14:28,760 You been in a group home before? 311 00:14:28,795 --> 00:14:30,295 It's always like this? 312 00:14:30,329 --> 00:14:33,798 No, last place I was in was an actual home. 313 00:14:33,832 --> 00:14:36,667 This is more like a fucking labor camp. 314 00:14:40,038 --> 00:14:42,039 Yo, give me your cash. 315 00:14:42,073 --> 00:14:43,874 - What? - Give me your cash. 316 00:14:43,908 --> 00:14:47,143 Now. Come on. 317 00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:51,048 Hey, Salvador, check it out. 318 00:14:51,082 --> 00:14:53,383 It's that chick from the movie Brave. 319 00:14:53,418 --> 00:14:57,220 - He your boyfriend? - No. Brother. 320 00:14:57,254 --> 00:15:00,056 I'm Lip. This is Ian. 321 00:15:00,091 --> 00:15:03,326 We don't want any trouble, all right? 322 00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,028 We're just passing through. 323 00:15:05,062 --> 00:15:08,065 Long as you show respect, you're gonna be fine. 324 00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:19,509 You're like a fucking cockroach. 325 00:15:19,544 --> 00:15:22,312 Able to live anywhere and feed off anything. 326 00:15:22,346 --> 00:15:24,948 Lemonade, man. 327 00:15:42,199 --> 00:15:44,801 [Exhales] 328 00:16:03,721 --> 00:16:08,726 [Cries] 329 00:16:14,733 --> 00:16:17,769 [Grunts] 330 00:16:20,073 --> 00:16:22,608 [Sighs] 331 00:16:22,642 --> 00:16:23,776 [Door opens] 332 00:16:23,810 --> 00:16:25,479 - Jimmy? - Darker. 333 00:16:25,514 --> 00:16:29,253 - Hey. Talk to your caseworker? - Unfortunately, yeah. 334 00:16:29,287 --> 00:16:31,390 Two reasons why we can't take in your brood. 335 00:16:31,425 --> 00:16:34,994 One. The fact that you had a foster child 336 00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:37,930 in your home that ran away under your "supervision." 337 00:16:37,964 --> 00:16:41,400 Two. Technically, the investigation's still pending 338 00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:43,502 as to the quality of your care. 339 00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,070 The quality of my care? 340 00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:46,505 You're saying her running away is my fault? 341 00:16:46,540 --> 00:16:48,107 Oh, you know what? 342 00:16:48,141 --> 00:16:50,910 Do not get all up in my grill, sister girl, okay? 343 00:16:50,945 --> 00:16:53,146 Well, it was worth a shot. 344 00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:55,415 Now what? 345 00:16:55,450 --> 00:16:56,817 Gotta kick it into high gear. 346 00:16:56,851 --> 00:16:58,785 Figure out where the kids are staying. 347 00:16:58,819 --> 00:17:00,954 Get the house ready for home inspection. 348 00:17:00,989 --> 00:17:03,257 They're gonna require a fit parent to get the kids back, 349 00:17:03,291 --> 00:17:04,591 so I'm hoping to find Monica 350 00:17:04,626 --> 00:17:07,461 so I don't have to deal with Frank. 351 00:17:07,495 --> 00:17:09,463 Why does it always come down to Frank? 352 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:14,167 [Sighs] 353 00:17:14,202 --> 00:17:15,802 Carl, it's dinner time. 354 00:17:15,836 --> 00:17:17,437 Carl? 355 00:17:17,472 --> 00:17:18,772 Where is that boy? 356 00:17:18,806 --> 00:17:20,607 Oh, I'm gonna pound your fucking hole. 357 00:17:20,641 --> 00:17:23,877 Yeah. Oh, that fucker's going up your ass. 358 00:17:23,911 --> 00:17:26,680 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 359 00:17:26,714 --> 00:17:27,881 Why don't you get those pants off 360 00:17:27,915 --> 00:17:29,983 so I can eat your fucking hole? 361 00:17:30,017 --> 00:17:31,684 Why do they all have moustaches? 362 00:17:31,719 --> 00:17:34,654 Out. Now. 363 00:17:34,688 --> 00:17:37,123 That was an invasion of our privacy and we won't have it. 364 00:17:37,157 --> 00:17:40,560 You are not to touch things that don't belong to you. 365 00:17:40,594 --> 00:17:41,895 Now sit down. 366 00:17:41,929 --> 00:17:43,563 Am I allowed to touch the chair? 367 00:17:43,597 --> 00:17:45,898 Don't be smart. 368 00:17:48,602 --> 00:17:52,171 - What the hell is this? - Kale, brown rice, and tofu. 369 00:17:52,206 --> 00:17:53,806 Your body is a temple, Carl, 370 00:17:53,841 --> 00:17:57,043 and you only want to put things in it that are natural. 371 00:17:57,078 --> 00:17:59,312 Like fists? 372 00:17:59,346 --> 00:18:01,915 I saw it in that movie. [Sighs] 373 00:18:01,949 --> 00:18:03,316 [Clears throat] 374 00:18:03,350 --> 00:18:06,319 [Christian TV's 1,2,3 Turnaround] 375 00:18:06,353 --> 00:18:08,755 ♪ Do, do, do, do, do, do ♪ 376 00:18:08,789 --> 00:18:11,090 ♪ do, do, do, do, do, do ♪ 377 00:18:11,125 --> 00:18:12,692 ♪ do, do, do ♪ 378 00:18:12,726 --> 00:18:15,362 ♪ I race my feet, I miss a beat ♪ 379 00:18:15,396 --> 00:18:16,829 ♪ throw my seat ♪ 380 00:18:16,864 --> 00:18:18,397 ♪ don't care, get off my back ♪ 381 00:18:18,432 --> 00:18:20,666 ♪ I make a sound, I wash it down ♪ 382 00:18:20,701 --> 00:18:22,168 ♪ around so round ♪ 383 00:18:22,202 --> 00:18:24,270 ♪ get off, don't touch my stack ♪ 384 00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:27,006 ♪ come step outside to shoot me high ♪ 385 00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:28,741 ♪ 'cause I'm about to crack ♪ 386 00:18:28,776 --> 00:18:32,212 ♪ 1, 2, 3, turn around, don't you watch me now ♪ 387 00:18:32,247 --> 00:18:34,047 ♪ just turn around ♪ 388 00:18:34,082 --> 00:18:37,718 ♪ touch your knees, don't look, just turn around ♪ 389 00:18:37,752 --> 00:18:39,353 ♪ do it now, do it now ♪ 390 00:18:39,387 --> 00:18:41,555 ♪ walk right through that door ♪ 391 00:18:41,590 --> 00:18:44,059 [Bottles clinking] 392 00:18:44,093 --> 00:18:45,360 Holes in your backyard have been filled. 393 00:18:45,394 --> 00:18:46,461 [Bottle opening] 394 00:18:46,496 --> 00:18:48,731 Hey, grandma, it's Fiona... 395 00:18:48,765 --> 00:18:50,699 Gallagher. 396 00:18:50,734 --> 00:18:53,235 Yeah. Yeah, it's been a while. 397 00:18:53,270 --> 00:18:55,604 Yeah, I was just wondering if you by any chance... 398 00:18:55,639 --> 00:18:58,074 maybe know where my mom might be? 399 00:18:58,108 --> 00:19:00,576 Your daughter. 400 00:19:00,610 --> 00:19:01,844 Monica. 401 00:19:04,247 --> 00:19:05,614 Yup. Yeah, I figured. 402 00:19:05,648 --> 00:19:07,282 But I just thought I'd try. 403 00:19:07,316 --> 00:19:09,918 Okay. Thanks. 404 00:19:09,952 --> 00:19:11,786 [Sighs] 405 00:19:13,622 --> 00:19:15,090 Now what? 406 00:19:15,124 --> 00:19:17,992 With no Monica, I kind of have no choice. 407 00:19:18,027 --> 00:19:19,561 I gotta find Frank. 408 00:19:19,595 --> 00:19:21,897 Get him sober and ready to appear in court. 409 00:19:21,931 --> 00:19:23,666 [Chuckles] 410 00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:28,671 He's like my sad-ass Obi Wan Kenobi. 411 00:19:28,706 --> 00:19:32,676 I can help you with that. 412 00:19:32,710 --> 00:19:35,445 That's a pretty nice offer considering 413 00:19:35,479 --> 00:19:37,647 how much of a dick I was to you about your dad. 414 00:19:37,682 --> 00:19:39,249 No, you're always a dick. 415 00:19:39,283 --> 00:19:40,884 Seriously, I don't mean to be an asshole. 416 00:19:40,885 --> 00:19:45,422 It's just... genetic. 417 00:19:45,456 --> 00:19:48,625 Yeah. You're not wrong. 418 00:19:52,329 --> 00:19:55,598 I need to suck it up about my dad being gay... 419 00:19:55,633 --> 00:19:57,366 and a liar. 420 00:19:57,401 --> 00:20:00,002 And I need to get over it. And I am. 421 00:20:00,037 --> 00:20:04,641 I'm good. 422 00:20:04,675 --> 00:20:06,376 Silver lining? 423 00:20:06,411 --> 00:20:07,711 Huh? 424 00:20:07,745 --> 00:20:10,681 Finally have the house to ourselves. 425 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:18,956 I'm sorry. I'm just not feeling it. 426 00:20:18,990 --> 00:20:22,994 You mind if we just lay here? 427 00:20:23,028 --> 00:20:26,431 Yeah. Yeah, sounds nice. 428 00:20:38,078 --> 00:20:39,545 What is this stuff? 429 00:20:39,579 --> 00:20:41,414 It's pus from your mother's monkey. 430 00:20:41,448 --> 00:20:42,848 Thought you liked the taste of that. 431 00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:44,217 What's your problem, dude? 432 00:20:44,252 --> 00:20:46,920 Nick, Salvador, find another table. 433 00:20:46,921 --> 00:20:48,029 Come on, chop-chop. 434 00:20:50,425 --> 00:20:51,725 Proof of your employment came through, 435 00:20:51,759 --> 00:20:53,327 so you go to work today. 436 00:20:53,361 --> 00:20:55,729 I need your employer to sign this, times in and out. 437 00:20:55,763 --> 00:20:57,397 Understand? 438 00:20:57,431 --> 00:20:59,332 You know, I'm actually pretty excited to get out there. 439 00:20:59,367 --> 00:21:01,067 - Start looking for work. - Nice try. 440 00:21:01,102 --> 00:21:04,270 You have court-mandated community service hours you owe. 441 00:21:04,305 --> 00:21:05,872 Yeah, but only a few. 442 00:21:05,906 --> 00:21:07,173 Then I can get out there and start looking for work, 443 00:21:07,208 --> 00:21:08,575 so I can become a contributing member 444 00:21:08,609 --> 00:21:10,777 of our great, capitalistic society. 445 00:21:10,812 --> 00:21:15,783 You think you're better than everyone here, don't you? 446 00:21:15,818 --> 00:21:18,686 Oh, that's-- that's rhetorical, right? 447 00:21:18,721 --> 00:21:21,088 I mean, you don't actually want me to answer that, do you? 448 00:21:21,123 --> 00:21:23,724 Cute. See, I could smack you across the face. 449 00:21:23,758 --> 00:21:25,426 But I think it's better I get out of your way. 450 00:21:25,460 --> 00:21:28,729 Let life bend you over instead. 451 00:21:33,068 --> 00:21:36,103 Dude thinks he's in an episode ofScared Straight. 452 00:21:41,643 --> 00:21:43,244 Ethel really fucked up our kid credit. 453 00:21:43,279 --> 00:21:44,713 Yup. 454 00:21:44,747 --> 00:21:46,482 Now we can't even get a foster kid? 455 00:21:46,516 --> 00:21:48,984 - Anybody can get a foster kid. - I think it's a sign. 456 00:21:49,018 --> 00:21:51,720 Jerry Sandusky could probably get a foster kid. 457 00:21:51,755 --> 00:21:52,955 It's a sign we need to step it up 458 00:21:52,989 --> 00:21:54,590 in the surrogate department. 459 00:21:54,624 --> 00:21:55,991 Look, we just did the baster thing with your mom. 460 00:21:56,026 --> 00:21:57,760 Let's just see if it works. 461 00:21:57,794 --> 00:21:59,495 Mama always pukes the morning after she gets knocked up. 462 00:21:59,529 --> 00:22:02,231 As a kid, it was like watching someone take ipecac, 463 00:22:02,265 --> 00:22:03,632 you could set your watch by it. 464 00:22:03,667 --> 00:22:05,000 My super "spermazoa" too much for her? 465 00:22:05,035 --> 00:22:07,803 Spermatozoa. I don't think it worked. 466 00:22:07,837 --> 00:22:11,340 We need to try something else. 467 00:22:11,375 --> 00:22:13,108 Frank? 468 00:22:13,143 --> 00:22:16,078 God damn it, did you sleep here last night? 469 00:22:16,113 --> 00:22:19,415 Guilty. 470 00:22:19,450 --> 00:22:21,618 Stella here yet? 471 00:22:21,652 --> 00:22:22,919 Oh, come on. I'm not helping you up. 472 00:22:22,953 --> 00:22:24,387 Get up. 473 00:22:28,792 --> 00:22:32,427 As of right now, you are officially on the wagon. 474 00:22:32,461 --> 00:22:34,762 DFS made a surprise appearance and the kids got pulled. 475 00:22:34,797 --> 00:22:36,437 It's time for your father-of-the-year act. 476 00:22:36,465 --> 00:22:38,299 Oh, my God. Are they all right? 477 00:22:38,334 --> 00:22:40,201 I'll tell you what. 478 00:22:40,236 --> 00:22:42,103 Let's meet back at the house and we'll get this all settled. 479 00:22:42,138 --> 00:22:43,972 Looks heavy. 480 00:22:44,006 --> 00:22:45,807 Why don't I carry this back to the house for you? 481 00:22:45,841 --> 00:22:48,942 But I need it for some errands I'm going to run a little-- 482 00:22:48,976 --> 00:22:50,776 Back at the house now, 483 00:22:50,810 --> 00:22:52,878 or you'll lose your kids and the welfare checks 484 00:22:52,912 --> 00:22:54,613 that come with them. 485 00:22:54,647 --> 00:22:56,715 I go to the house, the city finds Ginger's body. 486 00:22:56,750 --> 00:22:57,983 I'm toast. 487 00:22:58,018 --> 00:23:00,485 I found Ginger and I tossed her bones. 488 00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:01,787 You're safe. 489 00:23:01,821 --> 00:23:04,890 Oh. That's great. 490 00:23:04,924 --> 00:23:06,692 Not for you. 491 00:23:06,726 --> 00:23:09,395 You don't do exactly as I say, and I'll rat you out 492 00:23:09,429 --> 00:23:11,664 about Aunt Ginger's checks and your fake disability. 493 00:23:11,698 --> 00:23:15,535 - You don't have the balls. - Jesus Christ! 494 00:23:15,569 --> 00:23:19,673 I need you to do this! Can you just do this? 495 00:23:19,707 --> 00:23:22,576 I'm sorry. Did you just say you need me? 496 00:23:22,610 --> 00:23:24,745 Yes! I need you to get your shit together 497 00:23:24,779 --> 00:23:26,380 and get the kids back. 498 00:23:26,414 --> 00:23:29,216 Well, seeing as how you need something from me, 499 00:23:29,250 --> 00:23:32,085 maybe I need something from you. 500 00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:34,154 For starters, I would like to be shown 501 00:23:34,188 --> 00:23:36,022 the respect which I deserve. 502 00:23:36,057 --> 00:23:38,024 I believe I'm already doing that. 503 00:23:38,059 --> 00:23:39,593 And this one is non-negotiable. 504 00:23:39,627 --> 00:23:42,930 I want free roam of my own house. 505 00:23:42,964 --> 00:23:45,565 Fine. 506 00:23:45,600 --> 00:23:47,734 We're gonna go visit Lip and Ian in the group home. 507 00:23:47,769 --> 00:23:49,536 God knows what they've been dealing with in that shithole. 508 00:23:49,570 --> 00:23:53,374 And then we go find your lawyer. 509 00:23:53,408 --> 00:23:54,875 He has a lawyer? 510 00:24:00,249 --> 00:24:01,782 Don't worry, Liam. 511 00:24:01,817 --> 00:24:03,117 Soon as I steal enough stuff from these guys, 512 00:24:03,151 --> 00:24:05,219 we're outta here. 513 00:24:09,124 --> 00:24:12,860 [Rock music playing in car] 514 00:24:12,894 --> 00:24:14,528 I spent some time here. 515 00:24:14,563 --> 00:24:18,566 That summer mom was sent away for knifing a poodle. 516 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:22,603 - Hey! I missed you guys. - Oh, yeah! 517 00:24:22,638 --> 00:24:24,472 - How you holding up? - Aw, we're fine. 518 00:24:24,506 --> 00:24:25,940 The place is a joke. 519 00:24:25,974 --> 00:24:27,708 They still serving that rotten porridge? 520 00:24:27,743 --> 00:24:28,943 He already on the wagon? 521 00:24:28,977 --> 00:24:30,444 Oh, why do you have to say that? 522 00:24:30,479 --> 00:24:32,246 As of right now. You out on furlough? 523 00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:34,114 No, I've gotta work. He's gotta finish parole hours. 524 00:24:34,149 --> 00:24:35,816 You guys want a lift? 525 00:24:35,850 --> 00:24:37,951 No, we gotta get our bus passes signed by the driver. 526 00:24:37,986 --> 00:24:40,721 - You find Debs and the boys? - Not yet, but I will. 527 00:24:40,755 --> 00:24:42,556 Do you need anything? You need cash? Clothes? 528 00:24:42,590 --> 00:24:46,727 No, no. Look, don't worry about us, we're fine. 529 00:24:46,761 --> 00:24:50,331 Worry about him. 530 00:24:50,365 --> 00:24:52,833 Where's my hug? 531 00:24:52,868 --> 00:24:56,003 [Laughs] 532 00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:02,476 I'll wash, you dry. 533 00:25:02,511 --> 00:25:05,345 [Sneezes] 534 00:25:08,116 --> 00:25:11,351 Grab a cup of kool-aid from the table. 535 00:25:13,387 --> 00:25:15,421 Hey, strawberry shortcake! 536 00:25:15,456 --> 00:25:17,123 Get on in here and cut my toenails! 537 00:25:17,157 --> 00:25:18,591 [Groans] 538 00:25:18,625 --> 00:25:20,526 Okay, um, take over. 539 00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:23,095 Come on, come on. 540 00:25:26,133 --> 00:25:28,001 I mean, there's just no privacy. 541 00:25:28,035 --> 00:25:30,035 If I wanna jack-off, I gotta do it in the bathroom. 542 00:25:30,037 --> 00:25:33,841 Can't even begin to imagine what a pussy you'd be in juvie. 543 00:25:33,875 --> 00:25:35,008 [Laughs] 544 00:25:35,043 --> 00:25:37,611 You fuck anyone in there yet? 545 00:25:37,646 --> 00:25:38,712 God, no. 546 00:25:38,747 --> 00:25:40,681 Wise choice. 547 00:25:40,715 --> 00:25:42,983 Even if you're propositioned, it's probably just a setup. 548 00:25:43,018 --> 00:25:44,384 Guys want to find out if you're gay 549 00:25:44,419 --> 00:25:45,686 and pound the shit outta you. 550 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:47,654 And not in a good way. 551 00:25:47,688 --> 00:25:49,890 Great. 552 00:25:49,924 --> 00:25:51,724 Hey, my dad took my brothers on a run out of town 553 00:25:51,759 --> 00:25:54,961 for a couple days, so you wanna ditch that dump 554 00:25:54,995 --> 00:25:59,232 and crash at my place, you can. 555 00:25:59,266 --> 00:26:01,067 Was I just invited to a sleepover? 556 00:26:01,101 --> 00:26:05,571 Fuck you, is what you were invited to. 557 00:26:05,605 --> 00:26:08,741 [Laughs] 558 00:26:11,078 --> 00:26:13,045 Fiona here? She's not home. 559 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:14,547 Are you okay? 560 00:26:14,582 --> 00:26:16,316 Did you foster parents hurt you? 'Cause I will-- 561 00:26:16,350 --> 00:26:18,184 - No. We ran away. - Honey, you can't stay here. 562 00:26:18,219 --> 00:26:19,819 The police will come looking for you. 563 00:26:19,854 --> 00:26:21,588 We're with these two gay robot guys 564 00:26:21,622 --> 00:26:23,657 and they keeping talking about how they want to swipe Liam. 565 00:26:23,691 --> 00:26:25,525 Honey, you gotta go back. 566 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:27,027 I know what it's like to have a foster kid run away on me. 567 00:26:27,061 --> 00:26:28,428 Come on, I'll take you. 568 00:26:28,463 --> 00:26:30,097 What if they really want to keep Liam? 569 00:26:30,131 --> 00:26:31,766 The only reason why they would want to keep him 570 00:26:31,801 --> 00:26:33,902 is if they want him, so be sure that they don't. 571 00:26:33,936 --> 00:26:35,370 Be creative. 572 00:26:35,405 --> 00:26:37,273 Can you at least hold some of my stuff? 573 00:26:37,307 --> 00:26:40,109 What stuff? 574 00:26:40,144 --> 00:26:43,046 [Clattering] 575 00:26:49,322 --> 00:26:53,458 Jesus, Lou! [Laughs] When did that happen? 576 00:26:53,492 --> 00:26:56,028 - It's not mine. - Get to the point, Frank. 577 00:26:56,062 --> 00:26:57,295 Who's this? 578 00:26:57,330 --> 00:26:59,431 My daughter and her girlfriend. 579 00:26:59,466 --> 00:27:01,734 - Who's in trouble? - DFS snatched my kids. 580 00:27:01,768 --> 00:27:04,437 - I need you to get them back. - Catch? 581 00:27:04,471 --> 00:27:06,939 I have no money and no promise of any coming my way 582 00:27:06,974 --> 00:27:09,475 any time soon. 583 00:27:09,509 --> 00:27:11,644 Okay. 584 00:27:11,678 --> 00:27:14,713 First order of business, you need to get your ass to DFS. 585 00:27:14,748 --> 00:27:17,149 You need to file a petition to reinstate custody 586 00:27:17,183 --> 00:27:18,484 and you're gonna need to dig up 587 00:27:18,518 --> 00:27:19,951 that useless wife of yours, Monica. 588 00:27:19,986 --> 00:27:21,286 It's always better to have signatures 589 00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:23,054 from two shitty parents instead of one. 590 00:27:23,089 --> 00:27:24,890 What if we can't find her? 591 00:27:24,924 --> 00:27:27,059 Well, find someone that looks like her. 592 00:27:27,093 --> 00:27:29,061 And you're gonna need her to take parenting classes. 593 00:27:29,095 --> 00:27:31,397 And I'm gonna go ahead and get the case filed. 594 00:27:31,431 --> 00:27:33,566 And then I'll see you at the hearing. 595 00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,269 In the meantime, no drugs, no booze. 596 00:27:36,303 --> 00:27:37,770 No poppy seed bagels. 597 00:27:37,805 --> 00:27:41,674 I need your piss clean and your eyes white. 598 00:27:48,049 --> 00:27:50,450 Thanks for the phone call. 599 00:27:50,485 --> 00:27:52,352 You know how hard it is to find a public phone? 600 00:27:52,387 --> 00:27:53,987 Ian managed. 601 00:27:54,022 --> 00:27:55,622 Then I had to track your ass down through the city. 602 00:27:55,657 --> 00:27:57,324 Sorry, I've been busy. 603 00:27:57,358 --> 00:28:00,460 Molly's mom showed up at my house. 604 00:28:00,495 --> 00:28:04,098 - Oh, she's still alive? - Turns out Molly's a runner. 605 00:28:04,132 --> 00:28:05,533 What, you just let her take her? 606 00:28:05,567 --> 00:28:07,434 Oh, I was supposed to stop her? 607 00:28:07,468 --> 00:28:08,702 I don't know, if she ran it was probably 608 00:28:08,736 --> 00:28:10,469 for a good reason, no? 609 00:28:10,504 --> 00:28:12,939 Or not. I used to run away all the time when I was little. 610 00:28:12,973 --> 00:28:16,609 My point exactly. 611 00:28:16,643 --> 00:28:18,277 My dad's out of town for a few days 612 00:28:18,311 --> 00:28:20,045 and I told Mickey he could have the place. 613 00:28:20,079 --> 00:28:21,847 Can I stay with you? 614 00:28:21,881 --> 00:28:24,684 I got to play it straight in this group home for a bit. 615 00:28:28,688 --> 00:28:31,557 Maybe I can sneak you in tonight though. 616 00:28:31,592 --> 00:28:33,526 Promise I won't get gang raped? 617 00:28:33,560 --> 00:28:35,895 Nope. 618 00:28:35,929 --> 00:28:39,164 Whatever, I'm in. 619 00:28:42,434 --> 00:28:44,302 Why are you eating candy before dinner? 620 00:28:44,336 --> 00:28:47,672 'Cause it says here that dark chocolate has an amino acid 621 00:28:47,706 --> 00:28:49,340 that doubles your sperm count. 622 00:28:49,374 --> 00:28:50,908 I didn't read that one, but mama says 623 00:28:50,942 --> 00:28:54,077 asparagus and garlic does the trick, so tah-dah. 624 00:28:54,112 --> 00:28:56,513 If I eat all that, my piss is gonna stink for a month. 625 00:28:56,548 --> 00:28:59,149 And mama's bringing over oysters. 626 00:28:59,184 --> 00:29:01,853 But we gotta think of a better delivery system 627 00:29:01,887 --> 00:29:06,324 than the turkey baster. 628 00:29:06,359 --> 00:29:08,093 Squirt gun. 629 00:29:08,127 --> 00:29:09,395 Kind of messy. 630 00:29:09,429 --> 00:29:13,198 What about a straw? Silly straw? 631 00:29:13,233 --> 00:29:17,069 - Jacobs. - Here. 632 00:29:17,104 --> 00:29:21,508 And Weston. 633 00:29:21,542 --> 00:29:22,709 Weston! 634 00:29:22,743 --> 00:29:25,078 Here. 635 00:29:25,112 --> 00:29:28,548 All right, good night, you shits of Chicago! 636 00:29:28,582 --> 00:29:31,551 Pricks of Illinois! 637 00:29:50,239 --> 00:29:54,109 Have fun. 638 00:30:03,019 --> 00:30:04,720 How did you get the private room? 639 00:30:04,754 --> 00:30:06,288 I made some friends. 640 00:30:06,322 --> 00:30:07,789 Is this what it's gonna be like 641 00:30:07,824 --> 00:30:09,057 when you sneak me into your dorm in college? 642 00:30:09,092 --> 00:30:10,659 A little different. 643 00:30:10,693 --> 00:30:14,096 I'm guessing my dorm mates would be literate. 644 00:30:16,265 --> 00:30:18,233 You are out of your mind. 645 00:30:18,267 --> 00:30:20,335 Have you seen that fucking ponytail? 646 00:30:20,369 --> 00:30:22,270 It's a powerful ponytail, man. That's bullshit. 647 00:30:22,305 --> 00:30:24,239 Segal could totally kick Van Damme's ass. 648 00:30:24,273 --> 00:30:27,809 Oh, unless-- unless... 649 00:30:27,844 --> 00:30:29,644 It's Double Impact Van Damme. 650 00:30:29,679 --> 00:30:31,346 'Cause that's some Van double Damme! 651 00:30:31,380 --> 00:30:33,448 [Laughs] 652 00:30:36,719 --> 00:30:39,621 I wanna fuck Van Damme. 653 00:30:39,655 --> 00:30:42,624 [Movie music playing] 654 00:30:42,658 --> 00:30:47,262 ♪ ♪ 655 00:30:47,296 --> 00:30:49,197 Both: Are you out of your fucking mind? 656 00:30:49,231 --> 00:30:51,271 Kev is just gonna lie down with you for procreation, 657 00:30:51,300 --> 00:30:52,768 not sex. 658 00:30:52,802 --> 00:30:54,136 - What is the difference? - It's clinical. 659 00:30:54,170 --> 00:30:55,637 So no one enjoys it. 660 00:30:55,672 --> 00:30:57,807 Millions of sperm died in that turkey baster. 661 00:30:57,841 --> 00:30:59,541 This will deliver the biggest batch. 662 00:30:59,576 --> 00:31:01,710 The bigger the batch, the better the chance. 663 00:31:01,745 --> 00:31:03,345 Uh-uh. No, honey. 664 00:31:03,380 --> 00:31:05,648 This is an express bus to The Maury Povich Show. 665 00:31:05,682 --> 00:31:07,950 [Chuckles] 666 00:31:07,984 --> 00:31:10,286 I want nothing more than to be able to give you the baby 667 00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:12,388 that I know you want. 668 00:31:12,422 --> 00:31:16,793 And the grandbaby that you deserve. 669 00:31:16,827 --> 00:31:19,930 But I can't. And it kills me. 670 00:31:22,933 --> 00:31:27,103 Please, just give it a go while you're still ovulating. 671 00:31:28,773 --> 00:31:33,510 [Groans] 672 00:31:33,545 --> 00:31:35,746 What kind of hard liquor you got and how much? 673 00:31:35,780 --> 00:31:39,650 [Exhales] 674 00:31:39,684 --> 00:31:41,485 Damn, it's hot up here. 675 00:31:41,519 --> 00:31:44,721 That's because heat rises. 676 00:31:44,755 --> 00:31:49,492 Then how come space is so cold? 677 00:31:49,527 --> 00:31:51,561 [Knock on door] 678 00:31:51,595 --> 00:31:54,264 [Gasps] I got it. 679 00:31:54,298 --> 00:31:55,699 Who's at the door? [Door opens] 680 00:31:55,733 --> 00:31:57,000 - Hey. - Hey, uh... 681 00:31:57,035 --> 00:31:58,836 Who's at the door, baby? [Gasps] 682 00:31:58,870 --> 00:32:01,338 - No! Frank, no! - Wait. 683 00:32:01,373 --> 00:32:04,374 You-- first of all, get out! Get out! 684 00:32:04,409 --> 00:32:06,377 - Just hear me out. - You are not allowed in here. 685 00:32:06,411 --> 00:32:09,848 - Get out! - DFS pinched my kids. 686 00:32:09,882 --> 00:32:12,450 I need you to pretend to be Monica to help me get them back. 687 00:32:12,485 --> 00:32:15,286 What? No! No! Why should I do anything for you? 688 00:32:15,321 --> 00:32:19,725 - You left Hiram all alone. - I am begging you. 689 00:32:19,759 --> 00:32:23,295 As someone who knows what it feels like to lose a kid. 690 00:32:23,329 --> 00:32:24,930 Karen ran away. 691 00:32:24,964 --> 00:32:27,032 Can you imagine what it must feel like to have them 692 00:32:27,066 --> 00:32:28,300 taken from you? 693 00:32:28,335 --> 00:32:30,269 This isn't for Frank, okay? 694 00:32:30,303 --> 00:32:35,470 It's for Debbie and Carl and Liam. 695 00:32:35,504 --> 00:32:38,506 Maybe you should do it, Shelly-bear... for the kids. 696 00:32:42,612 --> 00:32:45,313 [Sighs] 697 00:32:45,347 --> 00:32:48,849 [Exhales] 698 00:32:51,486 --> 00:32:55,322 [Grunts] Give it up, Kev. 699 00:32:55,357 --> 00:32:58,925 You can't make it dark enough to deny 700 00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:01,160 what's about to happen in here. 701 00:33:01,194 --> 00:33:04,163 I wish I was drunk as you. 702 00:33:04,197 --> 00:33:05,897 No, I can't risk the whiskey-dick. 703 00:33:05,932 --> 00:33:07,332 Okay, let's get this going. 704 00:33:07,367 --> 00:33:08,467 [Laughs] 705 00:33:08,501 --> 00:33:12,637 Shh! Knock it off, mama! 706 00:33:12,671 --> 00:33:15,806 Hey, wait, wait, wait. What's with the KKK costume? 707 00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:17,407 I saw them use something like this 708 00:33:17,442 --> 00:33:19,976 at that super jewey wedding I went to last year. 709 00:33:20,010 --> 00:33:22,978 It keeps the skin from touching. Acts as a barrier. 710 00:33:23,012 --> 00:33:24,946 I feel like a ghost prostitute. 711 00:33:24,981 --> 00:33:27,481 You know, like that Jennifer Love Hewitt show. 712 00:33:27,516 --> 00:33:29,183 You seen that? 713 00:33:29,217 --> 00:33:32,519 You know, where she's, like, a call girl for ghosts 714 00:33:32,553 --> 00:33:33,987 or some shit. 715 00:33:34,021 --> 00:33:35,255 No, that-- it's two different shows. 716 00:33:35,289 --> 00:33:36,656 - All right, you two ready? - Yeah. 717 00:33:36,690 --> 00:33:37,991 No! Let me get the hell out of here first. 718 00:33:38,025 --> 00:33:41,060 I can't watch this part. 719 00:33:43,396 --> 00:33:47,131 You-- you okay out there? 720 00:33:47,166 --> 00:33:50,167 - Yeah, I'm fine. How are you? - You need any help? 721 00:33:50,202 --> 00:33:53,438 No, I'm fine. I'm fine. Thank you for asking. 722 00:33:53,472 --> 00:33:56,808 Ooh. Why she didn't cut me a mouth hole? 723 00:33:56,842 --> 00:34:01,312 How am I supposed to-- whoa! Hello! Ooh! 724 00:34:01,347 --> 00:34:03,481 Looks like I got a visitor down there! 725 00:34:03,516 --> 00:34:06,218 - Ooh! - God damn it. 726 00:34:06,252 --> 00:34:08,554 Whoops! Ding dong ditch. 727 00:34:08,588 --> 00:34:12,191 Somebody rang my bell and ran away. 728 00:34:12,225 --> 00:34:14,326 I feel like I'm fucking Casper. 729 00:34:14,361 --> 00:34:17,560 Hey, you know, it's getting seriously hard 730 00:34:17,595 --> 00:34:19,494 to breathe under here. 731 00:34:19,528 --> 00:34:22,830 - Can I take this off my face? - No! No! 732 00:34:22,864 --> 00:34:25,266 [Birds chirping] 733 00:34:29,070 --> 00:34:30,537 Can you dump Frank at DFS? 734 00:34:30,571 --> 00:34:32,571 I gotta drop some stuff off for Carl. 735 00:34:32,605 --> 00:34:34,440 Yeah, not a problem. 736 00:34:39,512 --> 00:34:42,180 Let's go, Frank! Showtime. 737 00:34:46,618 --> 00:34:49,586 [Rock music] 738 00:34:49,621 --> 00:34:57,626 ♪ ♪ 739 00:34:59,278 --> 00:35:02,452 _ 740 00:35:07,986 --> 00:35:09,366 _ 741 00:35:19,578 --> 00:35:20,945 Been a while since I've been in. 742 00:35:20,979 --> 00:35:24,682 Maybe I need a new picture. 743 00:35:24,716 --> 00:35:26,517 We had a bad meth run last year 744 00:35:26,551 --> 00:35:29,886 and you know what that stuff can do to you. 745 00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:32,921 They've got a website and everything. 746 00:35:35,625 --> 00:35:38,025 Well, now that you've filed your petition 747 00:35:38,060 --> 00:35:40,895 to reinstate custody, we'll need you to sign up 748 00:35:40,929 --> 00:35:42,530 for parenting classes. 749 00:35:42,564 --> 00:35:44,799 - Parenting classes? - Good. 750 00:35:44,833 --> 00:35:47,602 Also there may be some random drug tests 751 00:35:47,636 --> 00:35:49,804 and we'll need to set up a home visit prior 752 00:35:49,838 --> 00:35:51,439 to the possible release of the children. 753 00:35:51,473 --> 00:35:54,309 So I will get the class registration. 754 00:35:54,343 --> 00:35:58,479 I'll be right back. 755 00:35:58,513 --> 00:36:00,948 Fucking big brother. 756 00:36:00,983 --> 00:36:03,317 I don't want any goddamn parenting classes. 757 00:36:03,352 --> 00:36:04,786 What are they? 758 00:36:04,820 --> 00:36:06,788 You sit in a room and they lecture you 759 00:36:06,822 --> 00:36:09,490 how to be Ozzie and Harriet. 760 00:36:09,525 --> 00:36:12,260 I was thinking maybe I could figure out 761 00:36:12,294 --> 00:36:13,454 where I went wrong with Karen. 762 00:36:13,462 --> 00:36:14,829 Kids come pre-wired, 763 00:36:14,864 --> 00:36:18,634 it has nothing to do with your parenting. 764 00:36:18,668 --> 00:36:23,105 I pretty much like being a blonde. 765 00:36:23,139 --> 00:36:25,307 I feel like cotton candy. 766 00:36:41,461 --> 00:36:43,663 Hi. 767 00:36:43,697 --> 00:36:47,200 Uh, my name's Fiona Gallagher. I'm here to visit Debbie. 768 00:36:47,234 --> 00:36:48,535 Is she here? 769 00:36:48,569 --> 00:36:51,004 - Are you her mother? - Sister. 770 00:36:51,038 --> 00:36:54,474 I just want to say hi. May I see her? 771 00:36:56,377 --> 00:37:00,214 I just want to talk to her! 772 00:37:00,248 --> 00:37:02,483 Hey. 773 00:37:02,517 --> 00:37:04,351 Do all your talking out here. 774 00:37:04,386 --> 00:37:07,855 I'm gonna need her back in 15 for chores. 775 00:37:10,058 --> 00:37:11,659 You okay? 776 00:37:11,693 --> 00:37:15,296 Yeah, I'm fine. 777 00:37:15,330 --> 00:37:17,899 Are there a million kids in there? 778 00:37:17,933 --> 00:37:19,701 Just a few, but they're really nice. 779 00:37:19,735 --> 00:37:22,203 And Kamala's not so bad. 780 00:37:22,238 --> 00:37:25,073 Bed's pretty comfortable and there's hot water. 781 00:37:25,107 --> 00:37:29,411 [Sighs] 782 00:37:29,445 --> 00:37:33,215 I brought you some books and clothes. 783 00:37:33,249 --> 00:37:35,550 - Do you need any money? - Nope. I'm good. 784 00:37:35,585 --> 00:37:38,420 [Zipper] 785 00:37:38,454 --> 00:37:43,025 When do you think we can go back home? 786 00:37:43,059 --> 00:37:47,396 Soon. Real soon. 787 00:37:49,199 --> 00:37:51,000 I brought you some Hershey's Kisses too. 788 00:37:51,034 --> 00:37:55,504 These were like gold when I was in my first foster home. 789 00:37:55,539 --> 00:37:57,373 Thanks. 790 00:37:57,408 --> 00:38:00,377 [Breezy pop music] 791 00:38:00,411 --> 00:38:08,417 ♪ ♪ 792 00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:22,435 Hey, I got your brother's working papers for today. 793 00:38:22,470 --> 00:38:24,150 Oh, great. I'll give them to him. Thanks. 794 00:38:24,171 --> 00:38:27,741 - Where is he? - Uh, latrine. 795 00:38:27,775 --> 00:38:29,442 He's been there most of the night. 796 00:38:29,477 --> 00:38:32,546 Turns out eating diarrhea can actually give you diarrhea, so... 797 00:38:32,581 --> 00:38:34,248 Signed. In and out. 798 00:38:34,282 --> 00:38:36,617 And I better see him at lights out. 799 00:38:40,856 --> 00:38:43,891 That's it, Liam. Big circles. 800 00:38:43,925 --> 00:38:44,925 [Urine tinkling] 801 00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:47,994 [Doorbell rings] 802 00:38:48,029 --> 00:38:49,830 Please, come in. 803 00:38:49,864 --> 00:38:53,568 Carl! Liam! You have a visitor! 804 00:38:53,602 --> 00:38:56,170 - Hi there, I'm Lanier. - Hey, Fiona Gallagher. 805 00:38:56,205 --> 00:38:58,740 [Baby babbling] Fiona! 806 00:38:58,774 --> 00:39:02,811 Hey! Look at you two! 807 00:39:02,846 --> 00:39:04,914 Hey! 808 00:39:04,948 --> 00:39:07,183 Wow, you look so clean. 809 00:39:07,217 --> 00:39:09,452 Yeah, they make us take baths every night. 810 00:39:09,486 --> 00:39:11,620 And they have this weird toilet that cleans your bits. 811 00:39:11,655 --> 00:39:12,988 A "bidet." 812 00:39:13,023 --> 00:39:14,524 [Laughs] Sometimes in the summer 813 00:39:14,558 --> 00:39:17,193 we use a whacky lawn sprinkler for that, but... 814 00:39:17,227 --> 00:39:19,762 [Laughs] we gotta watch the spinning arms, right? 815 00:39:19,796 --> 00:39:21,765 We gotta watch those spinning arms. 816 00:39:21,799 --> 00:39:24,134 Please, come. Have a seat. 817 00:39:24,168 --> 00:39:27,103 It's nice to see that the boys have someone who loves them. 818 00:39:27,138 --> 00:39:30,674 We're glad you came. 819 00:39:30,708 --> 00:39:34,144 But just to make it clear, we have filed the paperwork 820 00:39:34,179 --> 00:39:36,280 to adopt Liam. 821 00:39:36,314 --> 00:39:38,549 And we're seriously considering adopting Carl too. 822 00:39:38,584 --> 00:39:40,318 But please know that we'd love for you to stay in contact 823 00:39:40,352 --> 00:39:42,287 and visit as often as you'd like. 824 00:39:42,321 --> 00:39:44,689 We think it's important for the boys to know 825 00:39:44,724 --> 00:39:46,391 where they come from. 826 00:39:46,426 --> 00:39:49,194 Why is my seat wet? 827 00:39:49,229 --> 00:39:51,630 Oh, no, Liam. Did you pee on the couch again? 828 00:39:51,665 --> 00:39:54,032 Was that you? And the wall too? 829 00:39:54,067 --> 00:39:56,701 Liam, that is a matte finish! 830 00:39:56,736 --> 00:39:58,303 How the hell are we gonna get that out? 831 00:39:58,337 --> 00:40:00,672 It's just paint, honey. I can touch it up. 832 00:40:00,706 --> 00:40:04,576 Now which color is that now? Summer shadow? 833 00:40:04,610 --> 00:40:06,745 He's just a baby. He didn't mean it. 834 00:40:06,779 --> 00:40:08,747 Babies are just so messy. 835 00:40:12,252 --> 00:40:15,654 [Baby babbling] Did you do that? 836 00:40:15,689 --> 00:40:18,822 - Did you do that? - A boat. 837 00:40:18,856 --> 00:40:20,856 All right, I gotta get to work. 838 00:40:20,891 --> 00:40:24,827 All right, just-- in a minute, okay? 839 00:40:24,862 --> 00:40:28,865 Wanna do the honors? 840 00:40:28,899 --> 00:40:30,833 - Is that a rosary for giants? - No. 841 00:40:30,867 --> 00:40:32,267 - Huh? - No. 842 00:40:32,302 --> 00:40:35,772 No, man, they're Ben Wa beads. 843 00:40:35,806 --> 00:40:40,042 You shove them in my ass and you pull them out real slow. 844 00:40:40,077 --> 00:40:43,713 - How is that fun for me? - Come on. 845 00:40:43,747 --> 00:40:46,182 All right, okay. Just easy on the injured cheek. 846 00:40:46,216 --> 00:40:47,817 I'll just go on the other one, all right? 847 00:40:47,818 --> 00:40:49,851 - Yeah. - Relax. 848 00:40:49,886 --> 00:40:52,749 [Grunts] 849 00:40:55,386 --> 00:41:00,522 [Both grunting] 850 00:41:00,557 --> 00:41:01,623 - Fuck. - Shit. 851 00:41:01,657 --> 00:41:03,191 What the fuck? 852 00:41:03,226 --> 00:41:04,725 [Electronic music] 853 00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:06,860 Dad! Dad! Hold on! Hold on! 854 00:41:06,895 --> 00:41:09,963 - Mandy wasn't enough for you? - Dad, hold on! 855 00:41:09,997 --> 00:41:11,965 Fucking piece of shit! Piece of shit! 856 00:41:11,999 --> 00:41:13,432 Huh? Huh? 857 00:41:13,466 --> 00:41:14,733 Get the fuck off him! 858 00:41:14,767 --> 00:41:19,570 [Both grunting] 859 00:41:26,511 --> 00:41:29,913 No son of mine is gonna be a goddamn AIDS monkey! 860 00:41:31,748 --> 00:41:34,484 Sit your ass down, you fucking ass-digger! 861 00:41:34,518 --> 00:41:36,086 [Groans] 862 00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:38,388 [Grunts] 863 00:41:40,958 --> 00:41:43,359 [Groaning] 864 00:41:54,203 --> 00:41:57,772 It's Terry. Send over the Russian. 865 00:42:01,510 --> 00:42:02,677 Okay, role play. 866 00:42:02,711 --> 00:42:07,650 All right, Monica, Frank. 867 00:42:07,684 --> 00:42:10,352 Okay, Monica, you play the teenage daughter. 868 00:42:10,387 --> 00:42:13,256 And, Frank, you be the father disciplining her 869 00:42:13,290 --> 00:42:16,593 for staying out after curfew. 870 00:42:18,162 --> 00:42:23,133 Um, where the hell were you so late? 871 00:42:23,167 --> 00:42:26,035 I was fucking mom's boyfriend. What do you care? 872 00:42:26,070 --> 00:42:27,837 You're nothing but a little tramp, you know that? 873 00:42:27,871 --> 00:42:29,472 Just like your mother. 874 00:42:29,506 --> 00:42:31,386 You know what, if you weren't stealing from her, 875 00:42:31,408 --> 00:42:33,942 maybe she wouldn't have to screw every Tom, Dick and Harry-- 876 00:42:33,977 --> 00:42:35,609 That bitch gave me herpes! 877 00:42:35,643 --> 00:42:37,443 As far as I'm concerned, I deserve every single dime. 878 00:42:37,477 --> 00:42:41,780 - She did not have herpes. - She fucking well did too. 879 00:42:48,553 --> 00:42:50,020 How was that? 880 00:43:02,332 --> 00:43:05,234 That one. 881 00:43:08,405 --> 00:43:13,009 She's gonna fuck the faggot out of you, kid. 882 00:43:13,043 --> 00:43:15,511 Ride him till he likes it, Suka. 883 00:43:20,250 --> 00:43:23,052 And you're goddamn gonna watch. 884 00:43:25,356 --> 00:43:27,056 [Grunts] 885 00:43:27,091 --> 00:43:30,059 [Rock music] 886 00:43:30,093 --> 00:43:32,695 ♪ ♪ 887 00:43:32,729 --> 00:43:34,864 [Grunts] 888 00:43:34,898 --> 00:43:42,871 ♪ ♪ 889 00:43:50,747 --> 00:43:54,450 [Grunting] 890 00:43:54,485 --> 00:44:00,290 ♪ ♪ 891 00:44:00,324 --> 00:44:02,392 How many more times are we gonna have to do this? 892 00:44:02,426 --> 00:44:05,561 Until we complete the mission. Now, come on, baby. 893 00:44:05,596 --> 00:44:08,030 You're Luke Skywalker and it's up to you 894 00:44:08,065 --> 00:44:11,134 to shoot one in and destroy the Death Star! 895 00:44:13,904 --> 00:44:15,372 Okay. Where's the sheet? 896 00:44:15,406 --> 00:44:18,210 No. No, I couldn't breathe last time. 897 00:44:18,245 --> 00:44:20,112 Well, we gotta put a Guantanamo hood on her 898 00:44:20,147 --> 00:44:21,547 or something. 899 00:44:21,581 --> 00:44:22,915 I don't know why I can't drink. 900 00:44:22,949 --> 00:44:24,083 Okay, shut up! It's hard for all of us. 901 00:44:24,117 --> 00:44:25,384 So both of you, shut up! 902 00:44:25,419 --> 00:44:28,588 Now everyone get in your positions. 903 00:44:28,623 --> 00:44:29,790 [Snapping fingers] 904 00:44:38,467 --> 00:44:42,303 All right. 905 00:44:42,338 --> 00:44:45,406 [Sighs] 906 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:47,508 Oh, come on, man! 907 00:44:47,543 --> 00:44:49,144 Don't do this, you piece of shit! 908 00:44:49,178 --> 00:44:50,980 You get hard when you smell pork chops. 909 00:44:51,014 --> 00:44:52,150 Yelling at it is not gonna help. 910 00:44:52,184 --> 00:44:54,287 Come here. 911 00:44:58,359 --> 00:45:02,696 Oh, there we go. 912 00:45:02,730 --> 00:45:04,532 - Ow! - Come on, you piece of shit! 913 00:45:04,566 --> 00:45:06,867 Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! God, baby! You can't do that. 914 00:45:06,902 --> 00:45:08,269 You're gonna build up calluses 915 00:45:08,303 --> 00:45:09,804 and I won't be able to feel dick. 916 00:45:09,839 --> 00:45:11,472 Well, right now, no one's feeling dick! 917 00:45:11,507 --> 00:45:14,309 - You think this is easy? - It's all my fault! 918 00:45:14,343 --> 00:45:16,778 You can't make the little soldier salute 919 00:45:16,813 --> 00:45:20,982 if he doesn't see an officer in the room. 920 00:45:21,017 --> 00:45:23,618 [Cries] I've lost all my stripes. 921 00:45:23,653 --> 00:45:26,622 Mama, this is not about you losing anything. 922 00:45:26,656 --> 00:45:28,723 [Cries] 923 00:45:28,758 --> 00:45:30,692 It's really me. I'm under a lot of pressure. 924 00:45:30,726 --> 00:45:32,227 - No. - It's all me, mama. 925 00:45:32,261 --> 00:45:34,362 I haven't had a date in months! 926 00:45:34,397 --> 00:45:38,967 I'm old and fat and unattractive 927 00:45:39,001 --> 00:45:42,704 and I'm gonna die alone. 928 00:45:42,738 --> 00:45:47,141 No, mama. [Cries] 929 00:45:47,176 --> 00:45:49,010 Well, this is not helping me get hard. 930 00:45:49,044 --> 00:45:52,414 [Cries] 931 00:45:52,448 --> 00:45:55,250 [Sighs] It's like when a plane goes down. 932 00:45:55,284 --> 00:45:58,719 - What do they call that? - Shitty? 933 00:45:58,753 --> 00:46:00,887 No, it's never just one thing that causes it. 934 00:46:00,921 --> 00:46:03,589 It's a chain reaction. 935 00:46:03,623 --> 00:46:06,391 Cascading failures. That's what this feels like. 936 00:46:06,426 --> 00:46:08,226 Losing my job, losing the kids, 937 00:46:08,260 --> 00:46:11,229 dealing with Frank. 938 00:46:11,264 --> 00:46:12,597 [Sighs] 939 00:46:12,632 --> 00:46:16,935 Someone recently told me to stop whining 940 00:46:16,969 --> 00:46:19,438 and feeling sorry for myself. 941 00:46:19,472 --> 00:46:22,341 [Chuckles] She sounds like a bitch. 942 00:46:22,375 --> 00:46:26,211 Well, she has her moments. 943 00:46:35,990 --> 00:46:39,026 Legally and morally there are acceptable methods of punishment 944 00:46:39,060 --> 00:46:43,264 for children, versus unacceptable methods. 945 00:46:43,299 --> 00:46:46,033 Uh, I'm sorry. 946 00:46:46,067 --> 00:46:49,570 Just hypothetically, if one's teenage daughter gave birth 947 00:46:49,605 --> 00:46:52,640 to a baby with Downs Syndrome and then took off, 948 00:46:52,675 --> 00:46:55,210 relieving her of all responsibility, 949 00:46:55,244 --> 00:46:57,212 if and when she should come back, 950 00:46:57,246 --> 00:46:59,314 would you recommend grounding? 951 00:46:59,349 --> 00:47:04,988 Or in that instance would a firm spanking be more... 952 00:47:05,022 --> 00:47:07,490 You know, before we take any more questions, 953 00:47:07,525 --> 00:47:09,626 let's just go over some of the basic... 954 00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:12,796 - Would you give me a Valium? - No, I only have one. 955 00:47:12,830 --> 00:47:16,833 And it's my safety net in case my hypnotherapy doesn't work. 956 00:47:16,867 --> 00:47:19,735 Hypnotherapy is just paying to nap in someone's office. 957 00:47:19,770 --> 00:47:21,270 Give me a pill. 958 00:47:21,304 --> 00:47:23,238 It's gonna show up in your urine test. 959 00:47:23,273 --> 00:47:25,341 - Give me the goddamn pill. - What's the matter with you? 960 00:47:25,375 --> 00:47:26,842 What this does is it puts the responsibility 961 00:47:26,877 --> 00:47:29,111 - right on the child. - Okay. Come on. 962 00:47:29,146 --> 00:47:30,946 Your job as parents is to define the rules... 963 00:47:30,980 --> 00:47:32,581 - Here. Christ. - And then lay out 964 00:47:32,615 --> 00:47:34,349 the consequences that will follow 965 00:47:34,384 --> 00:47:36,585 when those rules are broken. 966 00:47:36,619 --> 00:47:38,587 Now the child breaking the rules is then responsible 967 00:47:38,622 --> 00:47:40,823 for his or her own consequences. 968 00:47:40,857 --> 00:47:43,759 And this method actually leads to empowerment 969 00:47:43,793 --> 00:47:47,129 and helps him or her feel more in control of their own lives. 970 00:47:47,163 --> 00:47:49,999 How is she still ovulating? What is she, part bovine? 971 00:47:50,033 --> 00:47:52,702 - Shh. Focus on me. - Mm. 972 00:47:52,736 --> 00:47:55,704 Yeah, now you're gonna pretend like you're in high school 973 00:47:55,739 --> 00:47:57,940 and you're gonna come quickly like a rabbit, okay? 974 00:47:57,975 --> 00:47:59,842 - Ooh, yeah. - No, not that quick. 975 00:47:59,877 --> 00:48:01,978 Mama, get in here! 976 00:48:03,380 --> 00:48:05,681 Mm. 977 00:48:08,218 --> 00:48:09,852 [Grunts] 978 00:48:09,886 --> 00:48:12,288 - No. Not there, honey, no. - Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. 979 00:48:12,322 --> 00:48:14,290 You gotta shoehorn or something? 980 00:48:14,324 --> 00:48:16,892 Can you not talk, please? Just don't say a word. 981 00:48:19,029 --> 00:48:23,333 [Cries] 982 00:48:23,367 --> 00:48:25,969 Are you crying? Oh, God, she's crying. 983 00:48:26,003 --> 00:48:28,471 Please don't cry. I'm sorry, okay? 984 00:48:28,505 --> 00:48:30,806 I'm sorry, mama. Hey, hey, hey. 985 00:48:30,841 --> 00:48:32,641 Okay! That's it! 986 00:48:32,676 --> 00:48:34,577 We're gonna do this shit and we're gonna be done with it. 987 00:48:34,611 --> 00:48:36,078 Kev, get that dick hard. 988 00:48:36,112 --> 00:48:37,980 Mama, wipe your tears and focus! 989 00:48:38,014 --> 00:48:40,048 We need to give those little spermies someplace happy 990 00:48:40,083 --> 00:48:41,049 to swim to. 991 00:48:41,083 --> 00:48:42,084 Lay down! 992 00:48:42,118 --> 00:48:44,820 [Groans] 993 00:48:44,854 --> 00:48:46,388 Mm. 994 00:48:46,422 --> 00:48:49,358 - Mama, get on it. - Mm. 995 00:48:54,565 --> 00:48:57,434 Mm. Mm! 996 00:48:58,803 --> 00:49:03,206 [Muffled groaning] 997 00:49:03,241 --> 00:49:06,109 - Aah! - Mm. 998 00:49:06,144 --> 00:49:07,244 Uh-huh. 999 00:49:07,278 --> 00:49:08,278 Ooh! 1000 00:49:08,312 --> 00:49:09,579 Mm! Mm! Mm! 1001 00:49:09,613 --> 00:49:14,084 [All passionately moaning] 1002 00:49:14,118 --> 00:49:16,720 Hi. 1003 00:49:16,754 --> 00:49:19,155 I'm Monica. What's your name? 1004 00:49:23,060 --> 00:49:27,030 Frank, wasn't the last time I had to pee in a cup 1005 00:49:27,064 --> 00:49:29,866 when I was pregnant with Liam? 1006 00:49:29,901 --> 00:49:33,303 Remember that? It was just like yesterday, huh? 1007 00:49:33,337 --> 00:49:37,374 Oh. 1008 00:50:24,126 --> 00:50:27,862 Uh, sorry, the shower ran out of hot water. 1009 00:50:29,565 --> 00:50:31,600 Mama, you want Kevin to take you home? 1010 00:50:31,635 --> 00:50:33,135 Well, he can't drive with that leg. 1011 00:50:33,170 --> 00:50:35,104 No, but he can get you home in a taxi. 1012 00:50:35,138 --> 00:50:37,440 It's the least we can do. 1013 00:50:37,474 --> 00:50:40,509 Well, let me get my bag. 1014 00:50:40,544 --> 00:50:44,013 [Knock at door] 1015 00:50:44,047 --> 00:50:46,216 - Hey, Carol. - Hey, Fiona. 1016 00:50:46,250 --> 00:50:49,619 - Any work at the salon? - Uh, not right now, baby. 1017 00:50:49,653 --> 00:50:51,588 - But I'll keep you in mind. - Thanks. 1018 00:50:54,358 --> 00:50:55,525 [Door closes] 1019 00:50:55,559 --> 00:50:57,027 What was she doing here so early? 1020 00:50:57,061 --> 00:50:58,995 She slept over after she and Kevin had sex. 1021 00:50:59,029 --> 00:51:00,397 What? 1022 00:51:00,431 --> 00:51:01,464 Mama's the best surrogate we got. 1023 00:51:01,499 --> 00:51:02,866 Turkey baster didn't work 1024 00:51:02,900 --> 00:51:04,667 so we had to do it the old-fashioned way. 1025 00:51:04,702 --> 00:51:07,336 Jesus, V, I'm so wrapped up in my own pity party, 1026 00:51:07,371 --> 00:51:09,339 I had no idea what kind of biblical shit 1027 00:51:09,373 --> 00:51:12,008 you had going on here. 1028 00:51:12,043 --> 00:51:13,376 You okay? 1029 00:51:13,411 --> 00:51:16,046 If it works, I'll be fine. 1030 00:51:17,782 --> 00:51:19,250 How's Frank doing in rehab? 1031 00:51:19,284 --> 00:51:21,585 So far he seems to be holding it together. 1032 00:51:21,619 --> 00:51:23,087 Heading over to DFS now to make sure 1033 00:51:23,121 --> 00:51:24,555 he got all the paperwork in. 1034 00:51:24,589 --> 00:51:26,023 What's with all the asparagus? 1035 00:51:26,058 --> 00:51:27,692 You know how popeye gets all big and strong 1036 00:51:27,726 --> 00:51:28,860 when he eats his spinach? 1037 00:51:28,894 --> 00:51:30,261 Mm-hm. 1038 00:51:30,295 --> 00:51:33,265 That's what asparagus does for sperm. 1039 00:51:33,299 --> 00:51:35,434 Hm. 1040 00:51:40,472 --> 00:51:42,674 - You again. - Me again. 1041 00:51:42,708 --> 00:51:44,442 Just wanted to make sure Frank showed up 1042 00:51:44,477 --> 00:51:46,344 and all our paperwork was good to go. 1043 00:51:46,379 --> 00:51:48,880 He did. He passed his urine test with flying colors. 1044 00:51:48,914 --> 00:51:52,350 And yes, your paperwork is all set. 1045 00:51:52,384 --> 00:51:55,520 So now we just wait for a hearing? 1046 00:51:55,554 --> 00:51:57,355 Yeah. 1047 00:51:57,390 --> 00:52:01,292 You've done good, Fiona. You are a great sister. 1048 00:52:01,326 --> 00:52:04,893 And those kids are lucky to have you. 1049 00:52:10,166 --> 00:52:12,968 How did we show up on DFS radar? 1050 00:52:13,002 --> 00:52:16,538 It was an anonymous phone call, actually. 1051 00:52:16,573 --> 00:52:18,240 [Chuckles] I bet it was that bitch 1052 00:52:18,274 --> 00:52:20,409 we turned away from daycare 'cause her kid stunk. 1053 00:52:20,444 --> 00:52:24,580 Um, no. 1054 00:52:24,615 --> 00:52:27,783 - It was a man, actually. - A man? 1055 00:52:27,818 --> 00:52:31,153 It's never a man. Men don't give a shit. 1056 00:52:32,987 --> 00:52:34,788 How is it fair that someone can make one call 1057 00:52:34,822 --> 00:52:37,722 and completely ruin our lives, and they get to be anonymous? 1058 00:52:41,794 --> 00:52:43,562 I have to go to the restroom. 1059 00:52:43,596 --> 00:52:45,631 I'd appreciate it if you didn't click on this file 1060 00:52:45,665 --> 00:52:49,334 while I'm gone. 1061 00:53:10,791 --> 00:53:13,525 Frank: Yes, hello, I would like to report 1062 00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:17,263 a negligent situation. 1063 00:53:17,297 --> 00:53:20,333 2119 North Wallace. 1064 00:53:20,368 --> 00:53:21,968 Gallagher. 1065 00:53:22,003 --> 00:53:23,603 Female: And what's the situation? 1066 00:53:23,638 --> 00:53:26,173 Frank: Six kids living in squalor. 1067 00:53:26,207 --> 00:53:28,008 No parental supervision. 1068 00:53:28,042 --> 00:53:31,311 When the father is there, he's drunk. 1069 00:53:31,346 --> 00:53:36,283 He hits them. Not that they don't deserve it. 1070 00:53:36,317 --> 00:53:39,218 They're all criminals, delinquents, vile-- 1071 00:53:39,253 --> 00:53:40,720 Female: - Excuse me, sir. Frank: - What? 1072 00:53:40,755 --> 00:53:41,988 Female: Could you give me your name, please? 1073 00:53:42,023 --> 00:53:43,223 Frank: No. If it's all right, 1074 00:53:43,257 --> 00:53:44,891 I would like to remain anonymous. 1075 00:53:44,926 --> 00:53:46,727 Female: Thank you for bringing this to our attention. 1076 00:53:46,761 --> 00:53:50,397 Frank: No. Thank you. And God bless you. 1077 00:53:50,432 --> 00:53:52,552 [Leave The Light On by Hannah Cartwright & Ross Tones] 1078 00:53:52,764 --> 00:53:54,641 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 1079 00:53:54,778 --> 00:53:55,917 ♪ Don't believe the lies ♪ 1080 00:53:55,952 --> 00:53:59,708 ♪ your echoing heartbeat, echoing heartbeat ♪ 1081 00:53:59,742 --> 00:54:01,123 ♪ keeps our time ♪