1
00:00:02,080 --> 00:00:03,764
(PLATES CLATTER)
2
00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,881
This is what happens when you
miss an episode of Shameless.
3
00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:10,688
Your entire life goes
completely to shit.
4
00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:15,844
Anyone try to find me when I was
in the ICU for the last month?
5
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,365
We were kind of
hoping you were dead.
6
00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:19,762
- FIONA: You good?
- LIP: I learned I'm not an alcoholic.
7
00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:22,283
What about finishing college,
is that off the table?
8
00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:24,250
I got a professor, he's gonna
help me find something.
9
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:27,206
A tech start-up. ltjust might be a
while before I get paid, you know?
10
00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:30,284
This management thing is a pain in my ass.
I'm losing money.
11
00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:32,528
Tell you what, pay yourself
an extra 50 cents an hour.
12
00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:34,563
- Make up the difference.
- An extra buck an hour.
13
00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:36,041
Done.
14
00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:39,849
- Nice stroller. Where'd you get it?
-(RATTLE JINGLING)
15
00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:42,168
DEBBIE: Well, I found it in the park.
I'm gonna sell it.
16
00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:44,562
Dom won't go down on me
'cause I'm not circumcised.
17
00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:47,286
It has all this extra skin and
it kind of freaks me out.
18
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:49,041
I can't feel a thing.
19
00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:52,207
DR. SACHS: Don't
worry, you will soon.
20
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:54,850
I'm meeting an old high
school friend for dinner.
21
00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:56,805
IAN: Old friend? CALEB: Denise.
22
00:00:57,280 --> 00:00:58,691
Please tell me she has a dick.
23
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:01,531
You have no balance sheet, no
income or cash flow forecasts.
24
00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:04,366
Our yield on gross
revenues are shit.
25
00:01:04,880 --> 00:01:07,724
Are we seriously not gonna have sex?
'Cause I kinda took a Viagra.
26
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,010
Oh, yeah, just walk right by.
27
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:14,847
Ignore your father that you
tried to drown in the river.
28
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,844
I was only telling the truth.
29
00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:20,967
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
30
00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:29,927
(BANGING ON DOOR)
31
00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:34,324
FIONA: Come on, Frank!
Open the damn door.
32
00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:37,082
- Come on, Frank.
-(POUNDING CONTINUES)
33
00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:39,081
(BANGING ON DOOR)
34
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:41,331
Open the door.
35
00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:45,201
(GROANS)
36
00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:51,450
Hey, Hector? Hi, it's Fiona.
Shit. Hang on.
37
00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:56,882
Hi, you still there?
Sorry. Uh...
38
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,847
Can you work today? Santos
called in sick again.
39
00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:03,407
Yeah. I'm tired of his bullshit, too.
(GROANS)
40
00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:08,486
You can? Oh, that's great.
Okay, I'll see you at 10:00.
41
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:11,441
(SIGHS)
42
00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:22,686
Thought you were
livin' at Caleb's.
43
00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:24,127
LIP: Caleb's sleeping
with a chick.
44
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:25,640
He's bi?
45
00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:29,003
No dude is bi, all right? Lick
dick, you're supposed to be gay.
46
00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:30,321
30 YOU guys broke up?
47
00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:35,969
Haven't decided yet. Probably. God, I
can't believe he's licking vag, too.
48
00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:39,320
All right, can you guys please
stop talking about licking vag?
49
00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:40,567
You're gonna give me a boner.
50
00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:41,807
You sleep at all last night?
51
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,241
No. If I wake up with morning
wood, it'll pop my stitches.
52
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:47,171
You're 16. How you gonna
not get wood for 72 hours?
53
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:50,006
- Eyes on the prize, my brother.
- Yeah, which is? (CHUCKLES)
54
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:52,163
A blowie. From Dominique.
55
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,249
The chick who made
you cut your dick?
56
00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:55,806
Yeah, man, no girl's worth that.
57
00:03:56,360 --> 00:04:01,287
She didn't make me. I wanted to. You
guys just don't understand true love.
58
00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:04,325
Uh, you know, it's pretty cold out there.
You better put on a turtleneck.
59
00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:06,683
(EXCLAIMS IN SURPRISE)
Excuse you.
60
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,042
Well, you gotta forgive Carl. His
manners were in his foreskin.
61
00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:11,681
Ugh! Stop it. It just
gives me the willies,
62
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,370
thinking about someone
near my junk with a knife.
63
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:14,726
Where is my vacuum cleaner?
64
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,007
Upstairs, probably.
65
00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:17,650
Kev, grab our cleaning shit.
66
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:19,807
What's all that crap?
67
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,361
I'm helping Fiona with the
bills over at Patsy's.
68
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,045
Place is in a
financial shit storm.
69
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:25,526
Yeah, the Alibi, too.
70
00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:29,561
Svetlana's getting things in order.
Which makes me the house husband.
71
00:04:29,840 --> 00:04:31,524
I keep forgetting about
the weird situation
72
00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:32,841
you got going on
with the two wives.
73
00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:34,724
It's not weird. It's modern.
74
00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:37,686
Yeah, you could draw me a Venn
diagram to explain how that works.
75
00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:38,967
What's up with mopey?
76
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:40,367
Boy trouble.
77
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:41,847
Girl trouble.
78
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:45,529
I'll draw you a Venn diagram
to explain that, too.
79
00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:49,521
(SIGHS) Where's my vacuum?
What are you doing?
80
00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:53,128
Uh, vacuum, hall closet. And I'm
getting rid of Frank's shit.
81
00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,011
That fuckhead's
back in the house?
82
00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:58,370
Yeah. Nailed the door
shut from the inside.
83
00:04:58,760 --> 00:04:59,841
How's he getting in and out?
84
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,042
I don't know. Window?
Ladder? (SIGHS)
85
00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,250
Get a restraining
order on his ass.
86
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,611
That would mean that I cared.
And I don't anymore.
87
00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:10,841
Aren't you angry with him
about destroying your future?
88
00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:19,528
Did me a favor. Come on. Help
me bring his crap downstairs.
89
00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:25,291
Good morning, my wasted sperms.
90
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:28,570
Frank! You're walking. In a
weird way, but you're walkin'.
91
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,007
LIP: Yeah, why don't
you go away, Frank?
92
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:32,601
Is that any way to greet
your soon-to-be-ex father?
93
00:05:32,840 --> 00:05:34,729
"Ex-father"? We
would be so lucky.
94
00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:39,926
Filling out the paperwork to disinherit
you abortion-should-have-beens.
95
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:42,487
"Disinherit"? Wow. So we
don't get that jelly jar?
96
00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:44,922
Or the three pieces of silverware
you stole from the Ramada Inn?
97
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:46,849
Yeah, or the shame and
the embarrassment?
98
00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:48,531
Go ahead. Joke all you like,
99
00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,449
but once my parental
rights are terminated,
100
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:53,530
you can no longer use the
Gallagher family name.
101
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:57,287
Hallelujah. I'm just gonna be
like Cher and go by "Fiona."
102
00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:01,131
Here's your shit. I'm
taking my room back.
103
00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:02,640
And I'm padlocking the house.
104
00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:06,043
Aw, you made me toast. Thanks.
105
00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:08,804
Buh-bye. Gotta go to work.
106
00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:10,805
You can't get rid
of me that easily.
107
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,327
Has she talked to anybody about
what happened at the wedding?
108
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,445
- Not to me.
- Me, neither.
109
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,563
Tumors are repressed
feelings, you know.
110
00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:20,446
- Come on. Liam, let's go.
- What?
111
00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:23,963
He's the only one who stands a fighting
chance to become a real Gallagher.
112
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,043
- No fucking way.
- Yeah, you can't just take him, Frank.
113
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:28,647
Yes, I can. I'm his father.
114
00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:32,168
And he is staying in the will.
Aren't ya? (KISSES)
115
00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:36,208
(LAUGHING)
116
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:39,842
Do you think in his own way, Frank's
actually a pretty good dad?
117
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:42,770
- No.
- Jesus.
118
00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:46,045
FRANK: Well, look who it
is, Beauty and the Beast.
119
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,083
I'll leave it to you two
to figure out who's who.
120
00:06:48,280 --> 00:06:49,281
Too bad you're walking
again, Frank.
121
00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:51,169
I was praying for
permanent paralysis.
122
00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:52,811
Where'd you get the
stroller, Debs?
123
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,241
The only thing Monica
and I could afford
124
00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:58,166
to stroll you guys around in
was a Kroger shopping cart.
125
00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:00,050
Hey! Give me that.
That's not yours.
126
00:07:00,280 --> 00:07:02,760
Well, apparently, it's
not yours, either.
127
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:04,765
-(DEBBIE GROANS)
-"Maureen Wilson."
128
00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:08,164
Looks like you already cleaned out
the cash, Little Orphan Angry.
129
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:11,091
So, uh, I'll take the platinum.
130
00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:12,521
You can't do that, Frank!
131
00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:15,561
Should I call Ms. Wilson,
let her know you found it?
132
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,041
Fine, take it. Careful, Liam,
133
00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:20,328
I used to think Frank would
be a real dad someday, too.
134
00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:24,690
You and that little spic you sneezed out
of the cavern you called your uterus
135
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:26,803
better start looking
for a new last name.
136
00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:30,090
I'm disinheriting both of you and
taking back the Gallagher name.
137
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:34,848
Gladly. And while I'm at it, Franny's
gonna go by her middle name from now on.
138
00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:37,851
Harriet. Harry. So she has
no more connection to you.
139
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:41,847
"Harry!" Well, that's a perfect
name for the diesel dyke
140
00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:44,088
she's gonna grow
up to be some day.
141
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:46,210
Come on, kid, we got work to do.
142
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:50,565
Hey, Carl. Hey. Bunch of us going
to the movies tonight. Wanna come?
143
00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,167
I told you. I can't hang
out with you for 72 hours.
144
00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:54,686
Thought that meant we just
couldn't fool around.
145
00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:56,809
Even just being in your
vicinity gives me a boner.
146
00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:59,646
-(CHUCKLES) That's so sweet.
- Seriously, stop.
147
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,800
Hey, freak fuck! Heard you
got a tranny operation.
148
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:06,564
I only told a couple of people.
149
00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:09,247
Got your penis chopped off.
Now you're a lady.
150
00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:10,931
Not that you were that
far off to begin with.
151
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:12,525
See you around, Bruce Jenner.
152
00:08:12,920 --> 00:08:16,208
Hey, Bruce Jenner was the dude, so fuck
you guys! Thanks for the compliment.
153
00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:19,963
Don't listen to them. Okay, I think
you're manly for what you did.
154
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:23,926
And when the 72 hours
and one second is over,
155
00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:28,888
I'm gonna loosen your belt.
Then take off your pants.
156
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,526
- No.
- Then your underwear.
157
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,768
- No, no, stop.
- Then suck your lollipop.
158
00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:34,490
- Seriously.
-(CHUCKLES)
159
00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,326
Oh, fuck!
160
00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:38,609
Thought you said I just
couldn't go near you!
161
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:40,684
Where are you going?
We have class.
162
00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:42,883
Doctor. Clinic. Now.
163
00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:48,642
So, burger well-done with crispy
fries, and a Denver omelet, extra ham.
164
00:08:48,880 --> 00:08:52,646
- Thank you very much. Yes, thank you.
- Let me get you a refill on these sodas.
165
00:08:53,040 --> 00:08:54,041
MALE COOK: Order up!
166
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,804
We'll get that cleared up
for you in just a sec.
167
00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:57,121
You get my order on 14?
168
00:08:57,400 --> 00:08:59,767
Oh, yeah, I did.
You're two hours late.
169
00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,004
I called Melinda.
Said it wasn't busy.
170
00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:06,484
So you figured you'd just come
in whenever you felt like it?
171
00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:09,531
I had laundry to do.
Melinda was cool with it.
172
00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:11,321
(SCOFFS)
173
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:14,610
I'm glad you guys feel like you can just
change my schedule whenever you want.
174
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:16,725
What Sean always let us do?
175
00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:23,600
In case you haven't noticed, Sean's
not here anymore. Excuse me.
176
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:25,404
And that's too bad.
177
00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:27,925
FEMALE SECRETARY: Game
Change, please hold.
178
00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:30,170
- Phillip. Tito. Senior intern.
- Hey. Nice to meet you.
179
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,329
All right, follow me.
I'll show you around.
180
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:34,642
Oh, you can start by getting
coffee for the Three Musketeers.
181
00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:36,285
- Who?
- The owners, Phillip.
182
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,971
- Two million! Whoo!
-(ALL CHEERING)
183
00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:45,248
This is, uh, Sarah. Head
of sales and marketing.
184
00:09:45,560 --> 00:09:47,688
- Yeah.
- Black coffee. Extra hot. Splash of 2%.
185
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:50,645
Jesse, I buy ad space on your
stupid network every Sunday.
186
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,683
Least you could do is cut
me a deal for the playoffs.
187
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:54,770
Joe. Brains behind
the operation.
188
00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:56,649
And the VC guy. Raised the
money to start this place.
189
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,367
- He okay?
- Uh, new heated floors. He gets cold.
190
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,643
Green tea. Steeped for three minutes.
One Truvia.
191
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:05,049
Gene. Tech. Four double shots of espresso.
Before noon.
192
00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:06,406
Wears a new pair of
socks every day.
193
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:08,682
Throws out the old ones.
You'll help him put them on.
194
00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:10,524
- He doesn't like to take the goggles off.
- Copy that.
195
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:13,160
Uh, the sign is
self-explanatory.
196
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,527
Kitchen is yours, too. There's a
grocery list on the bulletin board.
197
00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:16,847
EXCITED EMPLOYEE: Three million!
198
00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:18,491
(CHEERING)
199
00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:25,281
Hey... Listen, you, you get paid,
you know, being the senior intern?
200
00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:28,728
No, but last senior intern just
got a job at Porsche Marketing.
201
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:29,927
100 grand a year.
202
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:31,804
- Fuck.
- Was only here eight months. So...
203
00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,885
But you can get started with
the coffee and the tea. So...
204
00:10:36,120 --> 00:10:37,121
Yeah.
205
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:40,085
All right? And, Phillip, um,
get me an iced soy latte.
206
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:41,681
(LIP SNIFFS)
207
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:48,610
MAN: (ON P A.) Home and
Garden, line four.
208
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,401
Buenos dias. Frank Gallagher.
209
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:57,046
My son, Liam. Looking for some workers
to help with a home masonry project.
210
00:10:57,800 --> 00:10:59,564
- Right here.
- Pick three guys
211
00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,888
with a strong physique
and a dumb disposition.
212
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:06,771
You. You. You.
213
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,607
(CHUCKLES) You make me
proud, my one and only son.
214
00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:14,367
Very proud. Uh, the
supplies I need.
215
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:16,324
(VEHICLE BEEPING)
216
00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,165
MAN: (OVER SPEAKER) Shelby,
report to Hardware.
217
00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:21,886
- JOHN: Frank fucking Gallagher.
-(LAUGHS)
218
00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:24,041
You got money for once, Frank?
219
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:29,128
Credit card. And could I get a
$400 cash advance on that card?
220
00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:30,850
And keep $100 for yourself.
221
00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:33,967
Whatever you say, "Mrs. Wilson."
222
00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:39,242
(DISPATCHER SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY)
223
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:40,961
(DOOR CLOSES)
224
00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:47,205
Yo. How come you didn't come home
last night? Or answer my texts?
225
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,047
-(BELT BUCKLE RATTLES)
- Busy.
226
00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:52,966
Care to elaborate?
227
00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:55,487
I don't know, ask Denise.
228
00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:58,361
Is that what this is about?
My high school girlfriend?
229
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:01,251
Your high school
girlfriend who you fuck.
230
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:04,331
- Whoa! What are you talking about? I--
- I saw you with her last night.
231
00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:05,970
You're spying on me?
232
00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:07,770
Yeah, 'cause I knew you'd
been cheating on me.
233
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:09,161
I wasn't cheating.
234
00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,165
So you didn't fuck Denise, then?
235
00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,807
Cheating would be if I sucked
some guy's cock, all right?
236
00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:15,327
So, you didn't sleep with her?
237
00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:17,205
- I didn't say that.
- I'm confused.
238
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,328
How do you think I feel? You're
the one calling me a cheater.
239
00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:22,888
You still haven't answered the question.
Did you or did you not fuck Denise?
240
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:24,844
Jesus. What's the big deal?
241
00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:27,811
-(LAUGHS) What's the big deal?
- She's an old friend.
242
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:29,041
Who you fuck!
243
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:30,850
We've been sleeping together
since we were kids.
244
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,570
Don't make this into
somethin' more than it is.
245
00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:35,200
You're taking your dick, you're
putting it into a vagina.
246
00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:36,845
And you're telling me you've
never done that before?
247
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,002
No. I haven't. I'm gay.
248
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:43,001
So am I! Sticking my dick in a friend's
vagina doesn't make me not gay.
249
00:12:43,320 --> 00:12:44,924
(SCOFFS) Are you
hearing this, Raul?
250
00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:46,651
This is why I didn't
wanna tell you.
251
00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:49,681
Because I didn't want you freaking
out the way you are right now.
252
00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:54,886
Oh. Geez. Sorry. Hey, how should I react
when you say you've been screwing a woman?
253
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:58,170
I don't know. Maybe by
being more accepting
254
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,806
of your partner's normal,
sexually-fluid experiences.
255
00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:02,929
Maybe by sharin'
some of your own.
256
00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:08,606
I don't have anything to share.
I'm gay. All right? 100% gay.
257
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,201
No one's a 100% anything.
258
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:11,771
Yeah, well, I am. All right?
259
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:15,726
So now this inexperienced vagina
fucker has got to get to work.
260
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:17,962
(SIRENS BLARING IN THE DISTANCE)
261
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:21,204
-(SIGHS)
-(DOOR CLOSES)
262
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,807
- Uh, you Trisha?
- I am.
263
00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:26,605
It's brand-new.
264
00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:33,925
(HORN HONKING)
265
00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:45,886
How much did you want, again?
266
00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:50,370
Like I said in the ad, at the store it's
$2,500, but I can let it go for two.
267
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,240
How about $1,500?
268
00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:53,881
You're haggling with me?
269
00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:55,525
Isn't that what
Craigslist is all about?
270
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:59,605
It's also about people
advertising baby stuff,
271
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,924
and when the pregnant lady shows up,
they cut the baby out of her stomach.
272
00:14:09,520 --> 00:14:12,888
- DR. SACHS: You doing all right?
- You're sewing up my penis, you tell me.
273
00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:16,609
You don't have a lot of
undamaged skin left down here.
274
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,769
Yeah, because you
chopped it all off.
275
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:21,202
I warned you this
would be difficult.
276
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:23,966
It's harder than I thought to
not get an erection. (SIGHS)
277
00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,925
You can get through this, son.
Just put your mind to it.
278
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,851
I literally think about
sex 70,000 times a day.
279
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:32,083
Have to find other
things to focus on.
280
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:33,801
Like what?
281
00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:38,122
Hairy balls can work. Or
your grandmother naked.
282
00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:40,489
I've even had patients
suggest to me
283
00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:42,722
that watching Ted
Cruz on C-SPAN is an
284
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:46,327
effective measure for
preventing an erection.
285
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:53,011
Okay, guys. Here's your Snappy.
Snap, snap, snap.
286
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:55,767
Here's- I don't know what this
is, but you guys like it.
287
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:57,007
And here's your tennis racquet.
288
00:14:57,160 --> 00:15:00,323
All right, you guys play. Daddy's
gotta clean this place up. All right?
289
00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:02,643
Yevgeny! Get that
out of your mouth!
290
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,730
What are you doin', man? You're gonna
light yourself up like a Christmas tree.
291
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,526
How'd you get my phone?
How'd you get my phone?
292
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:13,130
Come on, now. I gotta move all these
weights. I gotta clean this place up.
293
00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:16,364
Okay. Let me just take a break here first.
Just a second.
294
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:19,122
You know what? I'm gonna
use you as my weights.
295
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:22,211
Don't worry, Gemma, I'll
use you in my next set.
296
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,841
- AMY: (GIGGLES) Whee!
- Whee! Whee!
297
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:27,449
Shit. You are heavy.
298
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,571
LEGAL STAFF: (SINGING)
Happy birthday to you
299
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,045
Happy birthday to you
300
00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:45,521
Happy birthday, dear Sherry
Happy birthday to you
301
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,201
(ALL CHEERING)
302
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:54,521
(KNOCKING)
303
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:58,685
Excuse me. I'm looking for Chad.
Is he around?
304
00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:00,326
Chad!
305
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,451
Okay. Thank you.
306
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:16,285
Actually, sorry to bother you. I work
at Patsy's. I wanted to let Chad know-
307
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:17,726
Where?
308
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,089
Patsy's. Pies.
309
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:23,603
Oh, yeah. The dump on Franklin.
310
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,571
You know it. I've been
filling in as manager.
311
00:16:26,880 --> 00:16:28,928
I'd like to quit. Go
back to waiting tables.
312
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,282
That's fine. Do
whatever you want.
313
00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,408
Are you allowed to say that? I mean,
don't you have to run it by Chad first?
314
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:39,126
Red velvet. (CHUCKLES) I know
it's not your favorite, boss,
315
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:40,930
but Sherry wanted it
for her birthday.
316
00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:42,841
Oh.
317
00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:45,325
- Hey.
- Hi.
318
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,051
MARGO: Zoning board
is on my ass.
319
00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:50,204
Where's that environmental impact
study for the redevelopment project?
320
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:52,528
- Which one?
- The west side.
321
00:16:52,760 --> 00:16:54,569
I'll call Fitz. Tell
him we need it ASAP.
322
00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:59,690
Oh, and this one. She works at
that shithole over on Franklin.
323
00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:01,610
- Patsy's.
- Yeah, she wants to quit.
324
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,049
- You do?
-well, as manager.
325
00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:05,770
I wanna go back to
waiting tables.
326
00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:07,086
We should just shut it down.
327
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:10,410
- What?
- Uh, it's just not worth the aggravation.
328
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:12,927
-well, you can't close it.
- Why not?
329
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:15,726
- I depend upon it to feed my family.
- You just quit.
330
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,086
That's the problem
with havin' a family.
331
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,288
Well, I didn't think it would
lead to you closin' it.
332
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:21,410
Ah, it's on its
last legs, anyway.
333
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:23,564
We're planning on redeveloping
that whole block.
334
00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:26,929
You sure? Remember what happened to
that chicken place over on LeSalle?
335
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:30,368
Homeless guy started that kitchen fire to
stay warm, burned half the building down.
336
00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:33,450
If I stayed on as manager,
would you keep it open?
337
00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:36,127
Fine. Just don't lose any money.
338
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:39,561
Well, the only way to do
that is to fire people.
339
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:41,882
I mean, the old manager
hired so many unreliable-
340
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:45,562
Did you hear what I said?
Just keep it afloat.
341
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,245
Okay-
342
00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:57,682
Andale, gringos! Andale.
343
00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:17,251
Ooh! Nice wheels.
344
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,166
Ah, thanks. ljacked it.
345
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,844
Or it's one of my boss's cars.
Sent me to get it detailed.
346
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:26,527
Looks pretty clean already.
347
00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:29,645
Yeah, I was thinking aboutjust wiping
it down. Pocketing the 100 bucks.
348
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:31,205
I don't have a lot of time,
so I ordered for you.
349
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:32,447
Sweet. Thanks.
350
00:18:33,120 --> 00:18:36,124
So, what's up? You
sounded pretty freaked.
351
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:40,322
I, uh, confronted Caleb
about that chick.
352
00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:42,484
He's screwin' her.
353
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:45,564
I guess there's something to
be said for honesty, right?
354
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:48,047
Except he says
it's not cheating.
355
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:49,601
How'd he come up
with that reasoning?
356
00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:52,411
Says if it were a guy,
then he'd be cheating.
357
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:56,368
Guess that kinda
sort of makes sense.
358
00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:59,771
I'd rather have my girlfriend sleeping
with another chick than some dude.
359
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:01,765
- You ever fuck a guy before?
- Fuck,no.
360
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,729
-'Cause you're 100% straight, right?
- Absolutely.
361
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,890
Yeah, well, Caleb's trying to argue
that no one's 100% anything.
362
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,641
It's cheater's logic.
363
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:13,291
Ever think about experimenting?
364
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:16,566
With a dude? No.
365
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,249
Think it makes you less
worldly or some shit?
366
00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:23,287
Why?
367
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:26,485
You thinking about
experimenting with a chick?
368
00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:27,926
No.
369
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:31,603
I don't know. Maybe. (CHUCKLES)
370
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:36,124
So what would you do, right?
371
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:40,761
You're with this chick, bombshell
chick, you're fooling around, you know.
372
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:43,491
You look down, you realize
a guy had joined.
373
00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:45,170
He's suckin' your dick.
374
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:48,207
How far along am I?
375
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:50,125
So you're, like, 93% straight.
376
00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:52,169
It's like 96% straight.
377
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:54,767
All right.
378
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,281
Help wanted?
379
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:07,724
Yeah, I gotta cover the mornings when
you need to do your laundry. Right?
380
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:12,643
Girl, you got a
target on your back.
381
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,201
You're the bitch who told me
to stay home this morning.
382
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:16,481
(SCOFFS)
383
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,445
Let's make things a little
easier for us this time, Harry.
384
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:24,324
(CAMERA CLICKING)
385
00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:26,130
We'll steal the
stroller someone wants,
386
00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:29,608
instead of finding someone who
wants the stroller we have.
387
00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:34,771
And now, we wait and see
what happens, Harry.
388
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:44,721
(MESSAGE TONE DINGS)
389
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,287
Holy shit, Harry, we
got an e-mail already.
390
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:51,130
It's for the Bugaboo stroller.
391
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:56,324
Uh, hello, Melanie?
392
00:20:56,520 --> 00:20:59,126
Hi. You contacted me
about the baby Bugaboo?
393
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:00,970
Yes, it's still here.
394
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,844
I mean, available.
Uh, just one sec.
395
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:14,283
Hi, sorry, um, where
are you coming from?
396
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:17,046
Great. I'm not too far from you.
397
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,681
Why don't we meet at the, uh,
Trader Joe's on Ontario?
398
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:22,569
Great. I'll see you
there in 30 minutes.
399
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,801
-(CUTLERY CLATTERS)
-(CUSTOMERS CHATTERING)
400
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:38,647
ARIEL: Excuse me?
401
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:42,168
I saw the "help wanted"
sign at the window.
402
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:43,881
Uh-huh.
403
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:46,006
Can I leave my résumé with you?
404
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:47,601
Uh-huh.
405
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:48,881
Thanks.
406
00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:51,881
Uh-huh.
407
00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:53,201
(CHUCKLES)
408
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:57,441
(DOOR OPENS)
409
00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:05,361
(SOFTLY) Oh, fuck.
410
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:06,931
Son of a bitch.
411
00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:10,285
- Chuga-chuga-chuga-chuga-choo
-(KIDS GIGGLING)
412
00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:13,605
Hully-gully-hull
y--gully-hully-gully-goo
413
00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:15,285
Hully-gully-hully-gully--
414
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:19,449
Hey, Hully Gully, I just
cleaned that floor, man.
415
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,401
(GIGGLES)
416
00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:25,562
Man, what are you laughing at?
Again with my clean floor.
417
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:26,881
Here we go.
418
00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,568
-(AMY BABBLES)
- Oh!
419
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:31,684
No, you didn't.
420
00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:35,125
No, you didn't.
421
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:41,087
Ah, screw this. Food fight.
Animal crackers. Fighting.
422
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,530
-(SCREAMS)
-(AMY GIGGLES)
423
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,123
-(YELLS AND LAUGHS)
-(AMY GIGGLES)
424
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,331
Work looks good, gentlemen.
425
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:50,561
Gracias.
426
00:22:51,440 --> 00:22:53,010
Fiona's gonna be mad.
427
00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:54,327
Well, tough titties.
428
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:58,122
Gallagher and son would like to
thank you for your efficiency.
429
00:22:58,360 --> 00:22:59,361
Uno momento.
430
00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:04,606
(WHISPERS) This is where
we Iowball the illegals.
431
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:07,726
They got nothing over us
after the work is done.
432
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,451
Here we go. As
promised, $50 each.
433
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:13,927
You said $100.
434
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:19,364
How about we make it $75, and
I won't have you deported?
435
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,921
-(TOOLS CLATTER)
-(CHUCKLES) How about we make it $100,
436
00:23:23,120 --> 00:23:25,327
and we won't murder you and the
little brown boy in your sleep?
437
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:30,166
You've jogged my memory.
438
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,561
(STAMMERS) It was $100 each.
439
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:34,441
I was in a coma.
440
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:37,281
I was in the hospital. I was in a coma.
I get... (STAMMERS)
441
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,360
Lucky you caught me.
Was about to go home.
442
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:47,971
(SIGHS) I don't feel
so lucky right now.
443
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:53,646
Can barely find any skin you
haven't torn to sew back together.
444
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,001
Jesus.
445
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:57,366
Did the best I could.
446
00:23:58,720 --> 00:23:59,801
Put on your pants.
447
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:03,921
Carefully.
448
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:06,363
If it happens again, you're
gonna be in trouble.
449
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:10,042
May have no choice but to turn
that thing into a vagina.
450
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:13,843
Hairy balls, son. Hairy balls.
451
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:17,161
(SIGHS)
452
00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:18,886
You got restaurant experience?
453
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:20,685
Been waiting tables
since I was 13.
454
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:23,369
- Any felony convictions?
- Nope.
455
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:25,641
Are you working right now?
456
00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:28,043
Place I was at,
Pelloni's, closed down.
457
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:31,166
Uh, it's being turned
into an Urban Outfitters.
458
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:34,289
The owner here wanted to
close this place down, too.
459
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:35,971
But she's giving me a
shot to turn it around.
460
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:37,521
- Sounds cool.
-(DOOR OPENS)
461
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:39,882
That is just the kind of
enthusiasm that I'm looking for.
462
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:41,486
-(SIERRA CHUCKLES)
- FIONA: When can you start?
463
00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:42,721
Soon as you want me to.
464
00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:45,247
That's great. It's minimum
wage plus shared tips.
465
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,243
-(SIGHS)
- See you tomorrow at noon for training.
466
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:49,045
Thank you so much,
Miss Gallagher.
467
00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:58,041
- Hey, Olga?
- OLGA: Yeah.
468
00:24:58,240 --> 00:24:59,241
You're fired.
469
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:00,767
You can't fire me.
470
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:04,324
I'm the only woman of color.
And I will sue your ass.
471
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:06,081
DIDI: Excuse me,
where's the manager?
472
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:09,489
Hi, I saw your "help
wanted" sign.
473
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,165
You're hired. Come back
tomorrow at noon for training.
474
00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:17,726
Thank you. (CHUCKLES)
475
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:40,728
(INAUDIBLE)
476
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:46,001
(LAUGHS)
477
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:13,007
DR. SACHS". Hairy balls, son.
Hairy balls.
478
00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:04,768
(WILMA MOANING AND KISSING)
479
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:11,281
(IAN GASPS)
480
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:13,728
(WILMA MOANING AND KISSING)
481
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:15,726
You're making me so wet.
482
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:17,570
Here, feel.
483
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:21,367
Yeah, it's, you know, like a rainforest.
It's like a Slip 'N Slide.
484
00:27:21,520 --> 00:27:22,521
(MOANS) Yeah.
485
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:24,041
Lick my pUSSY-
486
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:26,561
_(lvlOANS) - Okay.
487
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:29,081
(IAN GRUNTS)
488
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:30,801
WILMA: Mmm-hmm.
489
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:32,081
(INHALES THROUGH TEETH)
490
00:27:32,360 --> 00:27:34,408
(MOANING)
491
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:40,086
Oh, God. I could come right now.
(MOANING)
492
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,926
But not yet. Come up here.
(MOANS)
493
00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:44,929
Come up here. (MOANS)
494
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:46,491
I wanna come with you inside me.
495
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:48,080
Whenever you're ready, okay?
496
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,209
- Oh, okay. I'll do that.
-(MOANS)
497
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,767
-(WILMA MOANING)
-(IAN GRUNTING)
498
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:01,881
TED CRUZ: (ON TV) Good morning.
499
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,881
God bless CPA C.
500
00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:07,681
(AUDIENCE CHEERS)
501
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:10,410
We're at the edge of a cliff.
502
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:13,481
- Liberty is under assault.
{DOOR CLOSES)
503
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:16,530
Why are you watching this crap?
504
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,007
To not get a boner.
505
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:19,601
Is it working?
506
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:21,840
So far.
507
00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:24,120
Is your penis doing okay?
508
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:26,880
It's all right.
509
00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:30,802
-(KEYS JINGLING)
- All right. I'm gonna go take a shower.
510
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:33,247
No, you're not.
511
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:36,486
- Huh?
- Go take a look for yourself.
512
00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:43,962
- Frank?
- I assume so.
513
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:45,726
The other side, too?
514
00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:47,407
Yep.
515
00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:54,121
(DOOR CLOSES)
516
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:56,011
- Hey, V.
- VERONICA: Hey.
517
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:58,245
Hey. Can I get a
beer and a water?
518
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:00,601
Thank you.
519
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,166
Starting to remind me of him.
520
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:07,207
Lip.
521
00:29:07,760 --> 00:29:09,364
(LAUGHS) Hey. Buddy, hey.
522
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:10,841
- FRANK: Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- What's going on?
523
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:12,730
Don't be talking
to strangers, son.
524
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:14,685
Frank, Liam can't be in here.
525
00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:17,565
Drinking age in my country is four.
And a half.
526
00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:19,365
KERMIT: That half really
makes the difference.
527
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:20,601
Fine. He can stay.
528
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:23,806
But no booze. And we
charge the same for sodas.
529
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,647
- Uh, extra for sodas.
- FRANK: Oh.
530
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:29,011
Don't be corrupting my son
531
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:31,720
with your interracial,
bisexual funny business.
532
00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:34,042
- What do you want, Frank?
- FRANK: Two Cokes.
533
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:36,329
Never thought I'd hear that
come out of your mouth.
534
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:40,651
Well, being a good role model for my
progeny is an important job, Kermit.
535
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,685
Unlike the bad influences
he's had up to this point.
536
00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:45,769
Hey, buddy. Hey. You doing okay?
537
00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:47,360
I'm having fun with Frank.
538
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:48,647
Well, of course you are.
539
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:50,444
Well, if you need anything,
you know how to call, yeah?
540
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:51,886
LIAM: Mmm-hmm.
541
00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:53,326
All right.
542
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:55,642
(MAN CHATTERING ON TV)
543
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:02,401
He'!-
544
00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,970
Wanna have some
real fun tonight?
545
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:09,245
What do you say you and me get
some female company for tonight?
546
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:11,731
You can have your
pick of the litter.
547
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:16,371
Now, the important criteria
to look for is who's DTF,
548
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:18,688
who's holding weed or coke,
549
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:22,210
and who makes your
wee-wee tingle.
550
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:24,765
- Now, go get the one you want.
-(WOMAN LAUGHS)
551
00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:37,848
Oh, tiny dude.
552
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,730
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
553
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:41,001
I've got a date.
554
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:44,970
A lovely choice.
555
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:47,011
- Hello.
- Hello.
556
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:48,926
Care to join us, doll face?
557
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:50,921
Sure.
558
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:52,771
LIP: Dude, it's
really not that bad.
559
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:54,561
How do you deal with it?
560
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:58,043
With the taste, and the
folds, and the slime.
561
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:00,846
Like a cheese dick and a throat
full of spooge, that's better?
562
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:02,121
Give me a beer.
563
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:04,281
(CHUCKLES)
564
00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:07,289
(GARGLES)
565
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:08,851
Man, if I sucked
some guy's dick,
566
00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:10,724
I wouldn't be half as dramatic
as you're being right now.
567
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:12,445
You're a better man than I.
568
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:14,081
You at least feel more worldly?
569
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:15,401
Not at all.
570
00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:17,803
- I think I had steam coming off of me.
-(CHUCKLES)
571
00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:19,641
Should I just get you
the Drano, then?
572
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,805
If I knew I could gargle with
it without dying, I'd say yes.
573
00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:24,765
You're 100% gay.
574
00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:27,205
I have PTSD.
575
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:28,970
(LAUGHING)
576
00:31:29,440 --> 00:31:31,363
-(DOOR OPENS)
-(CHATTERING)
577
00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:33,250
(LAUGHING)
578
00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:35,605
What the hell happened here?
579
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:36,841
SVETLANA: Did we get robbed?
580
00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:38,765
- Kev?
- Wake up. Hey.
581
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:40,401
(GROANS)
582
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,644
Hey, sexy. Hey, beautiful.
583
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:45,168
- What is going on?
- Uh, this place is a disaster.
584
00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:46,566
You were supposed
to clean today.
585
00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:49,565
Oh, I'm sorry. I know.
I got too busy.
586
00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:51,410
But we had a great day.
587
00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:54,445
Oh, my... Did you know Gemma can climb
up on the couch all by herself?
588
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:56,170
Your only job was
to clean today.
589
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:57,361
Really?
590
00:31:57,600 --> 00:31:59,409
I thought I was supposed to
keep the kids alive, too.
591
00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:02,162
We were at work all day
busting our butts.
592
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:04,288
Yeah, all we ask is to come
home to a clean house.
593
00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:05,931
I was working all day, too.
594
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:07,531
Doing what? Having a food fight?
595
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:09,370
- Did you even shower?
- VERONICA: Make us dinner?
596
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:11,927
Oh, my God. I'm not a maid. Why
are you two riding my ass?
597
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,771
Because you sat on that ass
all day doing nothing.
598
00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:17,490
Oh, that's exactly
what I did today.
599
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:19,161
Nothing. (LAUGHS)
600
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:22,524
I did a heaping shit pile
of absolutely nothing!
601
00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:30,685
- WOMAN: Uh, $328. (LAUGHS)
- Please.
602
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:32,485
No, no, no. No, wait, no, no.
603
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,007
Come on. Not the front door.
We have a special entrance.
604
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:38,604
- WOMAN: Whoa!
-(FRANK GRUNTS)
605
00:32:38,880 --> 00:32:39,881
You got a plan.
606
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:41,571
Yeah, of course there's a plan.
607
00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:44,004
Shit. Let's just...
608
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:45,486
WOMAN: Okay.
609
00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:47,802
(RACCOON CHITTERING)
610
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:51,850
- Ladies first.
- Okay. Oh, boy.
611
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:53,690
- I'll give you a boost.
- Okay.
612
00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:55,046
Liam, come on.
613
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:57,163
- Okay.
- Just don't fall. Okay?
614
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:00,091
Are you sure this thing is safe?
615
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:02,404
- Well, we'll find out soon. Okay.
- Okay.
616
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:03,886
Liam, grab my ankles.
617
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:07,687
- Okay.
- In you 90-
618
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:09,086
Yeah. Thank you.
619
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:11,681
-(WOMAN LAUGHS)
- FRANK: Jesus.
620
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:14,923
-(FRANK GRUNTS)
-(WOMAN LAUGHS)
621
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:18,121
(FRANK CHUCKLES)
622
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:27,841
(SIGHS)
623
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,046
Holy shit.
624
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:32,730
I had no idea our
floor was so slanted.
625
00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:36,240
It'd be nice to have a toothbrush
and a change of clothes.
626
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:37,607
Yeah, I need a shower.
627
00:33:37,960 --> 00:33:40,122
My ass is numb from this chair.
628
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:43,122
This couch is pretty comfy.
629
00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:44,885
You still not mad at Frank, huh?
630
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:47,847
I refuse to let him
have any of my energy.
631
00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:51,806
Dibs on the kitchen bathroom.
632
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:53,565
Oh, shit, you--
633
00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:55,321
(FIONA YELLS)
634
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:57,450
Shit. (GRUNTS)
635
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:00,121
We gotta get upstairs.
636
00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:02,806
Yeah, we can throw a stink bomb up
there if Liam weren't with him.
637
00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:04,451
He put bars up on the window.
638
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:07,849
FIONA: Do you guys think we can set
fire to the top floor of the house?
639
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:09,405
(BANGING) Hurry up in there.
640
00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:10,681
I'm using the sink.
641
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:19,327
Holy shit.
642
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,209
(CHUCKLES) Dude, that's
a mangled mess. Ugh!
643
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:25,643
Oh, my God. It's all
bloody and raw, man.
644
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:28,041
(CHUCKLES) You shouldn't have gotten
that stupid circumcision, man.
645
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,441
All right, well, I did. And there's
nothing I can do about it now.
646
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:31,840
So, fuck you guys.
647
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:33,001
I already feel like
enough of a freak
648
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:35,401
being the only Gallagher
who's not circumcised.
649
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,445
Thanks for making me
feel worse about it.
650
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:44,841
What the hell?
651
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:56,806
Hey, kids. You see those
ladies over there?
652
00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:58,840
They're gonna help
us clean the house
653
00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:00,883
so we can spend more
time playing together.
654
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:02,127
(CAMERA CLICKS)
655
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:05,241
Ah, what the hell.
656
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:07,528
(CAMERA CLICKING)
657
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:09,961
Yeah.
658
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:13,884
Main's off. And the
outside spigot's open.
659
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:15,605
All right. Hand me the hack saw.
660
00:35:16,520 --> 00:35:17,521
Thanks.
661
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:21,531
Let's see how long he lasts
up there without water.
662
00:35:27,640 --> 00:35:30,689
This is so fun, Harry. We
have such a great life now.
663
00:35:32,560 --> 00:35:34,050
Double stroller.
664
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:36,245
We could get a lot for that.
665
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:51,569
Pretty soon, we'll be able to
start saving up for college.
666
00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:55,250
Oh, no, it's okay, you don't have to go
to college if you don't want to, Harry.
667
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:57,482
(BABY CRYING)
668
00:36:01,240 --> 00:36:02,287
Shit.
669
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:04,488
(BABY CONTINUES CRYING)
670
00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:22,131
(GRUNTING)
671
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:30,370
That smell could knock a
buzzard off a gut wagon.
672
00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:31,801
(GRUNTS)
673
00:36:32,280 --> 00:36:33,725
He'!-
674
00:36:34,120 --> 00:36:35,963
Doll face, we gotta
hose you down.
675
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:40,367
You're riper than a fat
boy in a clown costume.
676
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:42,602
- Hey. (GIGGLES)
- Sorry.
677
00:36:43,240 --> 00:36:45,811
Liam, coffee on the hot plate.
678
00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:55,688
(TAP RUMBLES)
679
00:36:56,840 --> 00:36:58,729
(CREAKING)
680
00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:00,041
God damn it.
681
00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:04,921
(SNIFFS)
682
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:09,928
I think that it's
recently flushed.
683
00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:12,162
(CHEERING AND CLAPPING)
684
00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:16,165
Two raptors circling the nest.
685
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:33,161
Phew! Nest is secured.
686
00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:43,807
(KEYS JINGLE)
687
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:02,326
What's in the box?
688
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,364
New uniforms.
689
00:38:05,800 --> 00:38:07,882
Oh, those are so cute.
690
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,520
Oh, hell, no. I am not
exposing my legs.
691
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:11,881
Oh, come on, you'll
make more tips.
692
00:38:12,160 --> 00:38:13,571
Nobody sees my spider veins
693
00:38:13,720 --> 00:38:15,848
except my gyno and the
neighbor with the binoculars.
694
00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:17,850
Don't have to work here anymore.
695
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:20,007
Fine.
696
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:22,849
Bunch of us are going to The
Melody Lounge after work.
697
00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:24,326
- You should come.
- Is that a club?
698
00:38:24,680 --> 00:38:25,681
It'll be fun.
699
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:27,401
I don't have a
change of clothes.
700
00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:29,369
- Of course you do.
- Yeah, right.
701
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:33,247
(LAUGHS) Come on, you look fine.
Hey, bring Lip, too.
702
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:47,048
(SHARPLY INHALES AND EXHALES)
703
00:38:49,240 --> 00:38:51,481
You know, the Feds showed
up at my internship today.
704
00:38:52,240 --> 00:38:53,685
They took a couple of servers.
705
00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:57,087
- What for?
- No idea.
706
00:38:57,840 --> 00:38:59,080
Those nerds are
richer than balls.
707
00:39:02,720 --> 00:39:06,441
I texted Caleb. Told him to
meet me at the loft after work.
708
00:39:07,160 --> 00:39:10,289
- You gonna compare vagina stories?
- That's exactly what we're gonna do.
709
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:11,927
There's Carl.
710
00:39:14,680 --> 00:39:15,681
(RADIO STATIC)
711
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,366
Carl Gallagher, please
approach the ambulance.
712
00:39:19,720 --> 00:39:21,245
Gonna need you to
speed up, Carl.
713
00:39:24,240 --> 00:39:25,241
(KNOCKING)
714
00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:28,281
I'm coming.
715
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,089
You're gonna wake
up the damn babies.
716
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:37,290
You must be from the
topless maid company.
717
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:40,486
- You're quick. Can I come in?
- Yes.
718
00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:42,481
Yes.
719
00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:44,650
Let me show you around.
720
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:47,122
As you can see, the
place is a mess.
721
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:50,764
I'm gonna need you to do the
laundry, wash the dishes.
722
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:53,771
Clean the floors, vacuum
and dust the furniture.
723
00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:55,485
Sound good? Okay.
724
00:39:55,720 --> 00:39:57,245
Wow. Sorry.
725
00:39:57,480 --> 00:39:58,481
This is happening.
726
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:01,761
Those are spectacular.
727
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:03,606
It's amazing how you
stuffed them in there.
728
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:06,280
And now they're out in all their glory.
Hallelujah.
729
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:08,806
(CHATTERING ON RADIO)
730
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:10,485
What's happening to me?
731
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:12,922
Gave you a jumbo
dose of Thorazine.
732
00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:15,289
My brain feels
like cotton candy.
733
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:17,841
And that's the way you're gonna
feel for the next 72 hours.
734
00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:20,288
No way you get a
boner on that shit.
735
00:40:20,800 --> 00:40:23,121
Don't have to think about
hairy balls anymore?
736
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:25,361
(CHUCKLES) What?
737
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:28,323
You guys are the best.
738
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:38,968
(SIGHS) Wendy, don't
get me wrong.
739
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:40,361
I like what's going on here,
740
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:42,329
but are you gonna be doing
any cleaning today?
741
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,121
Cleaning?
742
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:48,291
You didn't bring any Lysol, or
ammonia, or a mop or anything.
743
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:52,722
You thought a topless maid
service actually did cleaning?
744
00:40:54,040 --> 00:40:55,121
Yes.
745
00:40:55,960 --> 00:40:57,007
That's cute.
746
00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:01,050
Here. My services are a la carte.
Pick what you like.
747
00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:04,042
-"Mop and Glow."
- That's one of my specialties.
748
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:05,726
I'm sure it is.
749
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,482
-"Pipe Cleaning."
- Old dudes like that one.
750
00:41:09,680 --> 00:41:10,841
"Brazilian Floorwax."
751
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:12,407
That one's not what
you think it is.
752
00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:14,881
I have no idea what
I think that is.
753
00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:18,846
"Sham Wow"?
754
00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:22,521
(DOOR OPENS)
755
00:41:23,240 --> 00:41:25,208
Hey. Finally decided
to come home.
756
00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:28,644
Did you trick me into
having sex with a woman?
757
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:30,367
What?
758
00:41:30,520 --> 00:41:31,726
So that you wouldn't feel
bad about what you did?
759
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:33,160
Look, what are you
talking about?
760
00:41:33,720 --> 00:41:35,927
You made me feel like a
freak 'cause I'm only gay.
761
00:41:36,240 --> 00:41:37,366
How you feel is on you.
762
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:40,606
I slept with some random
chick 'cause of you.
763
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:42,921
I didn't force you
to do anything.
764
00:41:43,240 --> 00:41:47,086
I can still taste her hairspray.
And her pubes, and her vagisitis.
765
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:49,011
You obviously picked
the wrong woman.
766
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:51,931
Don't turn this around on me. You're
the weirdo, all right? Not me.
767
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,169
Because I like to have sex
with women once in a while?
768
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:56,204
- It's not normal.
- It's very normal.
769
00:41:56,440 --> 00:41:58,283
If you're gay, it's not.
It's disgusting.
770
00:41:58,600 --> 00:41:59,761
Then don't do it anymore.
771
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:02,251
And it's a turn-off.
772
00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:05,123
Me? I'm the turn-off?
773
00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:07,602
If you sleep with women? Yeah.
774
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:09,440
Then why are we even going out?
775
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:14,885
I keep asking myself
the same thing.
776
00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:17,043
- Judgmental much?
- Vagina-fucker much?
777
00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:18,441
When did you become such a baby?
778
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:20,449
When did you become
such a bisexual?
779
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:25,281
So, that's it, then?
780
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:33,130
Yeah, I guess so.
781
00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:37,449
- Have a nice life.
- Already am.
782
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:41,247
(CLICKING AND HISSING)
783
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:44,161
Kevin, what are you doing?
784
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,164
I got a great idea
for a business.
785
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:49,564
- VERONICA: Where are the babies?
- Sleeping.
786
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:51,445
- Monitor.
-ls the house clean?
787
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:54,803
That is a great question, which is
directly related to my new business plan.
788
00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:56,923
- So,no?
- You are correct.
789
00:42:57,440 --> 00:43:00,330
The topless maid that I hired
was more of an escort.
790
00:43:00,560 --> 00:43:01,641
You hired a topless maid?
791
00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:03,808
- Did you have sex with her?
- Of course not.
792
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:05,809
What else did you think a
topless maid service did, Kev?
793
00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:09,004
I was focused on the maid part
and not the topless part.
794
00:43:09,280 --> 00:43:10,520
Which gave me this idea.
795
00:43:13,760 --> 00:43:15,808
-"Nooks and Fannies"?
- Yes.
796
00:43:16,480 --> 00:43:19,370
We are gonna start a maid service
that is not only topless,
797
00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:22,009
but also cleans. We'll
corner the market.
798
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:23,970
You expect me to clean
someone else's house?
799
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:25,804
Don't have to. That's
the genius part.
800
00:43:26,040 --> 00:43:28,486
You two are the boobs
of the operation.
801
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:29,806
She's gonna do the cleaning.
802
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:38,762
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
803
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:41,888
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
804
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,964
I think these girls just
invited me so I'd bring you.
805
00:43:47,720 --> 00:43:48,721
He'!-
806
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:52,041
- He's here, he's here. Oh, my God.
- Stop, stop, stop, stop.
807
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:54,211
- Hi, Lip.
- Hey. Hi.
808
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:55,731
Ah! (GIGGLES)
809
00:43:55,960 --> 00:43:57,166
What are you drinking?
810
00:43:57,800 --> 00:43:59,723
- Uh,been - Okay. You
want something, girl?
811
00:44:00,640 --> 00:44:03,246
Uh, a change of clothes.
You guys look great.
812
00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:05,323
Have a shot. It'll
make you feel sexier.
813
00:44:06,240 --> 00:44:08,641
Uh, two Stellas, and three
shots of Jager. On my tab.
814
00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:11,804
I saw you checking me out
during my interview.
815
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:14,081
It was that obvious?
816
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:15,721
But I liked it.
817
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:17,561
Oh.
818
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:19,367
LIP: Thanks.
819
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:20,921
Cheers, Boss.
820
00:44:21,240 --> 00:44:22,401
Thanks.
821
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:23,561
Cheers.
822
00:44:27,240 --> 00:44:28,241
Ugh!
823
00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:30,250
- Let's dance.
- Yeah. (CLEARS THROAT)
824
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:38,011
Just so you know,
825
00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:39,611
I have a kid and a
stupid ex-boyfriend.
826
00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:41,410
So, I'm not looking
for anything serious.
827
00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:45,845
Okay, well, I just got expelled from
college, did 30 days in rehab, so...
828
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:48,286
So we're a perfect match.
829
00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:54,961
- Hey.
- What's up?
830
00:44:58,400 --> 00:44:59,890
Is that Ariel's boyfriend?
831
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:03,522
No. She just met him on Tinder.
Going to the bathroom to bang.
832
00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:05,769
-(CHUCKLES) Uh-uh.
- You on Tinder?
833
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:08,888
Hmm. Not into the
meaningless, random hook-up?
834
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:13,770
Uh, nah, I'm more of a one-dysfunctional-
relationship-into-another kinda girl.
835
00:45:13,960 --> 00:45:16,042
- I'm taking a break.
- This is why you need Tinder.
836
00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:17,486
Give me your phone.
837
00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:22,484
You're a hot piece of ass. You
should be boning on the regs.
838
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:23,641
- Let's take a picture.
- I don't know.
839
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:30,488
They always seem to get attached.
Or maybe that's me.
840
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:32,406
You bragging about
your golden vagina?
841
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:35,731
No, more like my golden
ability to pick liars.
842
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:38,566
Then don't talk to them.
Just swipe, fuck, leave.
843
00:45:40,120 --> 00:45:41,804
Ooh, you already
have three matches.
844
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:45,322
And Luke is at the bar across the street.
Ready to rumble.
845
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:48,565
- Mmm-hmm.
- Oh!
846
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:01,201
(SNARLS)
847
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:02,970
What the fuck.
848
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:04,481
YO, yo; yo:
849
00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:06,366
- What's going on?
- That.
850
00:46:06,640 --> 00:46:07,641
Oh!
851
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:10,207
Holy shit. Fuck.
852
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:13,605
Don't say Papa never
gave you a pet.
853
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:15,291
(LAUGHS)
854
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:16,806
Hey. He)'-
855
00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:18,041
(SNARLS)
856
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:19,281
(SHUDDERS)
857
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:22,847
(LAUGHS) V!
858
00:46:23,680 --> 00:46:26,729
V! Where are you?
859
00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:29,809
Oh, V! Hi.
860
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:31,326
What the hell are you doing?
861
00:46:31,800 --> 00:46:33,006
Can V come out and play?
862
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:35,851
It's 2:00 a.m. My kids, and my
husband, and wife are sleeping.
863
00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:37,644
(FIONA LAUGHS)
864
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:39,723
You know that that
sounds weird, right?
865
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:41,121
You're drunk.
866
00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:43,727
And fucked. I just
Tinder fucked.
867
00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:47,362
This guy. His name is like a J.
Or an L.
868
00:46:47,720 --> 00:46:48,926
Or some other letter.
I don't care.
869
00:46:49,360 --> 00:46:51,567
Careless, mindless
sex has set me free.
870
00:46:51,720 --> 00:46:53,882
- Tell me more about it tomorrow.
- This guy was doing...
871
00:46:56,240 --> 00:46:57,480
What the fuck?
872
00:46:59,920 --> 00:47:02,002
Did you just close
the door on my face?
873
00:47:12,320 --> 00:47:14,163
- LIP: Found a pickaxe.
- What the hell are you doing?
874
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:16,089
- Looking for demolition tools.
- Fiona?
875
00:47:16,240 --> 00:47:17,924
- There's a shovel in here.
- She's asleep.
876
00:47:19,240 --> 00:47:20,241
(CLATTERS)
877
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:21,441
VERONICA: It's me.
878
00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:26,764
Hey, I brought you some coffee. I
figured you might be hungover.
879
00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:29,522
I am. What time is it?
880
00:47:29,920 --> 00:47:32,571
Not as early as you ringing
my door bell last night.
881
00:47:33,560 --> 00:47:35,130
- Huh?
- Don't "huh" me.
882
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:39,050
- Yo, Fi.
- Hmm?
883
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:40,770
Pickaxe, sledgehammer?
884
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:42,770
Sledgehammer.
885
00:47:42,960 --> 00:47:43,961
(LIP SIGHS)
886
00:47:45,120 --> 00:47:47,441
- I'll see you upstairs.
- FIONA: Yeah, I'll be up in a minute.
887
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:50,283
(GRUNTS) We're getting
rid of Frank.
888
00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:55,044
(GROANS) ow;
889
00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:57,442
So, who is this random guy you
hooked up with last night?
890
00:47:57,960 --> 00:47:59,883
Key word in that
sentence is "random."
891
00:48:00,960 --> 00:48:01,961
I don't know.
892
00:48:03,040 --> 00:48:04,644
Why you sleeping with
random dudes, anyway?
893
00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:07,202
Why am I not hooking
up with random dudes?
894
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:10,490
- Some sort of rebound thing from Sean?
-(SNORTS)
895
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:14,484
I'd have to care for it to
be a Sean rebound thing.
896
00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:16,969
Funny, you said the
same thing about Frank.
897
00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:19,646
Ooh. Having a rebound
thing with Frank?
898
00:48:20,320 --> 00:48:22,163
No, dummy. Caring.
899
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:26,282
You seriously think that I give
a fuck about Sean? Or Frank?
900
00:48:26,480 --> 00:48:29,006
It's been weeks, and you
haven't talked at all
901
00:48:29,160 --> 00:48:30,605
about what happened
on your wedding day.
902
00:48:32,000 --> 00:48:33,411
'Cause there's nothing
to talk about.
903
00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:37,284
So I'm not gonna talk about it.
Ever.
904
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:44,681
(GRUNTS)
905
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:51,000
It's harder than I thought.
906
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:53,801
You're up.
907
00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:00,841
(GRUNTS)
908
00:49:11,360 --> 00:49:12,725
What the fuck?
909
00:49:27,400 --> 00:49:31,849
CARL AND DOMINIQUE: Five,
four, three, two, one.
910
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:34,526
(DOMINIQUE CHUCKLES)
911
00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:37,485
Okay. Well, the 72 hours is up.
912
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:46,482
(MUSIC PLAYING)
913
00:49:46,490 --> 00:50:15,441
English-SDH
BY [PR]