1 00:00:02,393 --> 00:00:04,917 - Hot tea for my milady? - Oh, thanks, sweetie. 2 00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:06,832 With the wedding coming up, what do you think about 3 00:00:06,919 --> 00:00:08,617 the two of us taking dance lessons? 4 00:00:08,704 --> 00:00:10,793 What are you talking about? I'm already a fine dancer. 5 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,926 Some might say, a dancin' machine. 6 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,972 Well, I do love the Mike Biggs signature 7 00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:18,061 side-step, side-step, air punch. 8 00:00:19,802 --> 00:00:21,673 I call that my "Rock 'em sock 'em robot." 9 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:23,110 I've been known to clear a dance floor 10 00:00:23,197 --> 00:00:25,155 with that thing. 11 00:00:25,242 --> 00:00:28,332 Oh, yeah, I've seen it. One, two, punch, punch, punch.. 12 00:00:32,728 --> 00:00:34,730 Hey, I throw in a couple of hitch-hikes 13 00:00:34,817 --> 00:00:36,688 every now and then. 14 00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,560 Gimme a little fries with that shake. 15 00:00:40,301 --> 00:00:43,608 If you have a dollar, I'll give you a lap dance. 16 00:00:43,695 --> 00:00:45,523 Yeah, bring it on, Cinnamon Britches. 17 00:00:47,351 --> 00:00:51,007 I'm just doing this to work my way through college. 18 00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:53,401 No touchy the tushy. 19 00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:56,186 You guys are so cute. 20 00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:59,972 - Aren't they cute? - Adorable. 21 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:02,758 - Guys, this is Dylan. - Nice to meet you. 22 00:01:02,845 --> 00:01:04,803 Mr. Flynn. Mrs. Flynn. 23 00:01:04,890 --> 00:01:06,196 Hi. 24 00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:10,331 No, sweetie, this is Mike and Molly. 25 00:01:10,418 --> 00:01:11,462 Right. 26 00:01:11,549 --> 00:01:14,422 My parents are Eileen and Gary. 27 00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:17,816 Well, it seems like Eileen and Gary did a very good job. 28 00:01:19,427 --> 00:01:21,994 - Where did you two meet? - Gas station. 29 00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:23,953 Oh. You work at the gas station? 30 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:25,346 I wish. 31 00:01:27,913 --> 00:01:29,393 Can I talk to you in the kitchen? 32 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,047 Sure. 33 00:01:31,134 --> 00:01:32,527 Be right back, baby. 34 00:01:32,614 --> 00:01:33,789 Make yourself at, uh.. 35 00:01:33,876 --> 00:01:35,617 We'll be right back. 36 00:01:37,140 --> 00:01:39,751 - Wanna sit down? - Sure. 37 00:01:39,838 --> 00:01:41,013 [Molly] 'You pick up some weirdo at the gas station' 38 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:42,798 'and bring him into our home?' 39 00:01:42,885 --> 00:01:45,757 [Victoria] 'He's not a weirdo, he's a musician.' 40 00:01:45,844 --> 00:01:47,107 So, you're a musician? 41 00:01:49,283 --> 00:01:50,980 Yep. 42 00:01:51,067 --> 00:01:52,590 [Molly] 'You don't know anything about this guy.' 43 00:01:52,677 --> 00:01:53,939 'For all you know, he could be a serial killer!' 44 00:01:54,026 --> 00:01:55,115 [Victoria] 'Serial killers don't offer' 45 00:01:55,202 --> 00:01:56,159 'to clean your windshield' 46 00:01:56,246 --> 00:01:57,334 'and tell you you're hot!' 47 00:01:57,421 --> 00:01:58,683 [Molly] 'Yes! Yes, they do!' 48 00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:04,602 You're not a serial killer, are you? 49 00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:06,648 Nope. 50 00:02:06,735 --> 00:02:08,171 I only asked because of your 51 00:02:08,258 --> 00:02:09,564 "Manson-esque" quality. 52 00:02:09,651 --> 00:02:13,176 It's cool. I get that a lot. 53 00:02:13,263 --> 00:02:14,612 [Molly] '...bringing home these strays.' 54 00:02:14,699 --> 00:02:16,310 'You gotta grow up. You're 30 years old!' 55 00:02:16,397 --> 00:02:18,964 [Victoria] 'Hey, be quiet! He thinks I'm jailbait!' 56 00:02:26,189 --> 00:02:28,800 Let me ask your opinion as a musician. 57 00:02:34,415 --> 00:02:36,547 Do you think I need to take dance lessons? 58 00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,854 That depends. Are you dancing now? 59 00:02:41,813 --> 00:02:45,165 You just don't get it, 'cause I'm blowing your mind. 60 00:02:45,252 --> 00:02:47,210 ♪ For the first time ♪ 61 00:02:47,297 --> 00:02:49,734 ♪ In my life ♪ 62 00:02:50,779 --> 00:02:53,434 ♪ I see love ♪♪ 63 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:05,054 [instrumental music] 64 00:03:06,882 --> 00:03:08,275 Got a full day ahead of me 65 00:03:08,362 --> 00:03:10,581 and I got three hours of sleep last night. 66 00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:12,235 When did Victoria and the missing link 67 00:03:12,322 --> 00:03:14,542 finally stop doing it? 68 00:03:14,629 --> 00:03:16,413 Uh, a little after 4:00. 69 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:19,721 That's the last time I heard, "Oh, yeah. Right there, baby." 70 00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:22,898 You know, I could do it for that long, too. 71 00:03:22,985 --> 00:03:25,379 I just think you can make your point in far less time. 72 00:03:26,902 --> 00:03:28,251 Let me tell you something. 73 00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,471 Last night's noisy booty-booty-bang-bang 74 00:03:30,558 --> 00:03:31,689 was a dig at me. 75 00:03:31,776 --> 00:03:33,038 When she knocked over that lamp? 76 00:03:33,125 --> 00:03:35,084 Come on, it's socliche. 77 00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:39,262 You know, I'm capable of pulling an all-nighter, too. 78 00:03:39,349 --> 00:03:41,786 It's just that you're so darn sexy. 79 00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:43,266 It's like holding in a sneeze. 80 00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:48,750 Good morning, Mike. And only Mike. 81 00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:53,537 Morning. Sugar? 82 00:03:53,624 --> 00:03:55,757 Oh, yeah. There it is. 83 00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:57,628 Ah, that's the sweet stuff. 84 00:03:57,715 --> 00:03:59,021 Oh, yeah! 85 00:04:00,936 --> 00:04:04,635 Oh, I'm sorry, did Dylan and I keep you up last night? 86 00:04:04,722 --> 00:04:06,637 No. We slept like babies. 87 00:04:06,724 --> 00:04:08,291 Right after we made love. 88 00:04:08,378 --> 00:04:10,206 For an appropriate amount of time. 89 00:04:15,559 --> 00:04:17,169 So what time did prince charming 90 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,607 finally skateboard back to the Mobil station? 91 00:04:21,957 --> 00:04:24,960 For your information, he's still here. 92 00:04:25,047 --> 00:04:27,745 Well, you need to get him out because we're all going to work. 93 00:04:27,832 --> 00:04:29,573 - He can leave when he gets up. - No! 94 00:04:29,660 --> 00:04:31,488 We cannot leave a stranger alone in this house. 95 00:04:31,575 --> 00:04:34,056 - What if he steals from us? - Dylan is not a thief. 96 00:04:34,143 --> 00:04:35,362 How would you know that? 97 00:04:35,449 --> 00:04:38,365 Because he doesn't have anything. 98 00:04:38,452 --> 00:04:40,149 A thief would have all sorts of stuff. 99 00:04:42,064 --> 00:04:43,326 She's got you there. 100 00:04:45,981 --> 00:04:47,287 I should go. 101 00:04:49,027 --> 00:04:51,378 - Bye, sweetie. - Have a good day, Mike. 102 00:04:51,465 --> 00:04:52,814 And only Mike. 103 00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:57,166 [instrumental music] 104 00:04:57,253 --> 00:04:59,386 It was scary the way those girls were going at it. 105 00:04:59,473 --> 00:05:01,213 Normally it's a very peaceful household 106 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,085 but things started to get pretty hot. 107 00:05:03,172 --> 00:05:04,304 You talking about hair-pulling, nail-scratching 108 00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:05,696 and nipple twisting? 109 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:12,660 What? No, they were just arguing. 110 00:05:12,747 --> 00:05:14,749 Oh. Well, then you and I have very different ideas 111 00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:16,228 of what hot is, my friend. 112 00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:19,884 By the way, I can't make it tonight. 113 00:05:19,971 --> 00:05:21,408 Molly and I have plans. 114 00:05:21,495 --> 00:05:22,626 Man, it's roller derby night. 115 00:05:22,713 --> 00:05:24,280 Foxy chicks on skates. 116 00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:27,065 Look like a fool sitting there by myself. 117 00:05:27,152 --> 00:05:28,893 Sorry, Molly wants us to be all graceful 118 00:05:28,980 --> 00:05:30,330 for the wedding so she signed us up 119 00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:31,766 for dance classes. 120 00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:33,942 You're taking dance classes? Can I go watch that? 121 00:05:34,029 --> 00:05:37,380 That sounds way better than the roller derby. 122 00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:40,035 And I'm guessing twice as many women will be knocked down. 123 00:05:43,168 --> 00:05:45,083 I don't know why I have to take these stupid classes. 124 00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:47,347 For a big man, I'm actually very light on my feet. 125 00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:49,131 I think your feet would have a different opinion. 126 00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,049 Hey, I can fake my way through two minutes 127 00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:55,790 of slow dancing at my wedding. 128 00:05:55,877 --> 00:05:57,357 I think I'm gonna have to side with Molly on this one. 129 00:05:57,444 --> 00:05:58,967 It's your first dance, and all eyes on you. 130 00:05:59,054 --> 00:06:01,926 Not to mention video cameras and cell phones. 131 00:06:02,013 --> 00:06:03,493 Yeah, that stuff gets on the Internet 132 00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,365 and for the next 20 years people are gonna be googling 133 00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:06,801 "Fat guy backs into wedding cake." 134 00:06:09,107 --> 00:06:10,892 Although, it will never be as funny 135 00:06:10,979 --> 00:06:12,676 as "Fat cop chases hat." 136 00:06:12,763 --> 00:06:14,983 Mm. 137 00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:18,769 I can't believe you put that on YouTube. 138 00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:20,641 Hey, I made you famous, as of last week 139 00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:23,687 that thing was up to a hundred thousand hits. 140 00:06:23,774 --> 00:06:26,124 You're beating the masturbating kangaroo. 141 00:06:26,211 --> 00:06:28,605 [instrumental music] 142 00:06:31,652 --> 00:06:33,654 Great, it's gone. Your boyfriend stole my iPod. 143 00:06:33,741 --> 00:06:34,785 Think it through, Molly. 144 00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:36,265 If he was gonna steal from us 145 00:06:36,352 --> 00:06:39,268 why would he have borrowed money, too? 146 00:06:39,355 --> 00:06:41,096 Well, if you're planning on sleeping with him again 147 00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,358 you're gonna do it at his place. 148 00:06:42,445 --> 00:06:43,881 I can't stay at his place. 149 00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,796 They don't allow women at the halfway house. 150 00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:49,104 Molly, now back off. 151 00:06:49,191 --> 00:06:53,282 Yes, your sister has a faulty picker. 152 00:06:53,369 --> 00:06:54,849 But we don't know for sure 153 00:06:54,936 --> 00:06:57,634 that this particular dirt-bag is a thief. 154 00:06:57,721 --> 00:06:59,897 Thank you, mom. 155 00:06:59,984 --> 00:07:01,943 Fine, let's pretend that we haven't lost 156 00:07:02,030 --> 00:07:03,597 several major appliances 157 00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:06,077 after one of Victoria's conjugal visits. 158 00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:11,169 Yeah, I do miss that Margarita machine. 159 00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:16,000 My night stand looks naked without it. 160 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:20,527 And what kind of a grown man wants a bread maker? 161 00:07:20,614 --> 00:07:22,616 The kind of man that likes to bake fresh bread 162 00:07:22,703 --> 00:07:24,313 for his wife and children! 163 00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:28,926 Sweetie, uh, maybe you should think 164 00:07:29,013 --> 00:07:32,147 about a more thorough screening process for your fellas. 165 00:07:32,234 --> 00:07:33,583 You always take her side 166 00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:35,455 because you think she's the smart one! 167 00:07:37,239 --> 00:07:39,067 'And if we're gonna accuse each other's boyfriends' 168 00:07:39,154 --> 00:07:41,417 'of stealing, why don't you ask your boyfriend' 169 00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:43,506 'what happened to all my pudding cups?' 170 00:07:43,593 --> 00:07:44,899 Uh-oh. 171 00:07:55,779 --> 00:07:57,651 Sorry about your pudding. 172 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,305 Maybe you could hide 'em better. 173 00:08:02,264 --> 00:08:04,353 She's such a know-it-all. 174 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:05,789 How do you put up with her? 175 00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:07,661 Well, the fact that she has sex with me 176 00:08:07,748 --> 00:08:09,053 buys her a lot of goodwill. 177 00:08:13,014 --> 00:08:15,799 I'm so sick of her telling me what to do. 178 00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:18,541 I realize sometimes she can come off like kind of a pit bull 179 00:08:18,628 --> 00:08:22,458 but just remember, it's coming from a very caring place. 180 00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:26,114 Neither of them like anybody I bring home. 181 00:08:26,201 --> 00:08:30,640 Doesn't matter if it's an unemployed drummer 182 00:08:30,727 --> 00:08:33,600 or a married orthodontist who likes bread. 183 00:08:37,995 --> 00:08:40,389 Well, as long as you're living with your mom and your sister 184 00:08:40,476 --> 00:08:43,305 they're always gonna be looking out for the baby of the family. 185 00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:45,307 - But I'm not a baby. - I know. 186 00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:47,614 You're a beautiful girl with a wonderful 187 00:08:47,701 --> 00:08:49,354 trusting nature, but a lot of guys will 188 00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:51,879 take advantage of that. 189 00:08:51,966 --> 00:08:54,577 I lead with my heart, Mike.. 190 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,840 ...and my breasts. 191 00:09:02,933 --> 00:09:05,893 I mean, my breasts are on top so they kinda get there first. 192 00:09:12,639 --> 00:09:14,510 Mom, maybe if you didn't baby her all the time 193 00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:15,946 she wouldn't act so immature. 194 00:09:16,033 --> 00:09:18,166 Well, maybe if you had sense enough 195 00:09:18,253 --> 00:09:19,950 to hide your things when there are strangers 196 00:09:20,037 --> 00:09:21,648 in the house, you'd still have your iPod. 197 00:09:21,735 --> 00:09:23,345 Oh great, so now it's my fault 198 00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:25,782 because I didn't hide my belongings in my own house? 199 00:09:25,869 --> 00:09:27,784 Molly, give me a break, I'm trying to get drunk here. 200 00:09:31,919 --> 00:09:34,443 Victoria's outside and she's pretty upset. 201 00:09:34,530 --> 00:09:37,098 - Oh really, she's upset? - Yeah, crying and everything. 202 00:09:37,185 --> 00:09:40,057 So maybe you ladies could just, I don't know.. 203 00:09:40,144 --> 00:09:42,016 maybe cut the poor kid a little slack. 204 00:09:42,103 --> 00:09:44,540 Listen, buddy, don't come waltzing 205 00:09:44,627 --> 00:09:48,283 into my house and tell me how to run things! 206 00:09:48,370 --> 00:09:52,113 Speaking of waltzing, I'm taking dance classes. 207 00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:54,594 Well, you should be taking shut-your-pie-hole classes. 208 00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:56,247 Mom! 209 00:09:56,334 --> 00:09:58,467 I don't need you telling me how to raise my girls 210 00:09:58,554 --> 00:10:00,077 and stick to the areas you know best.. 211 00:10:00,164 --> 00:10:02,253 The cupboard and the fridge. 212 00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:05,126 Wow, gun to a knife fight. 213 00:10:07,084 --> 00:10:09,826 Mom, that is myfiance and a member of this family 214 00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:11,523 and you should be a little bit more considerate 215 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:12,699 of his feelings. 216 00:10:12,786 --> 00:10:15,353 Oh, we're being considerate now? 217 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,138 Well, maybe someone should consider 218 00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:18,618 locking the bathroom door 219 00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:20,837 if they're gonna weigh themselves butt naked. 220 00:10:24,536 --> 00:10:26,147 That's really the only way to get an accurate reading. 221 00:10:26,234 --> 00:10:28,366 My underwear alone weighs almost two pounds. 222 00:10:35,591 --> 00:10:36,374 [instrumental music] 223 00:10:38,550 --> 00:10:42,685 One, two, three. Two, two, three. 224 00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:45,601 Heads high, eyes on your partner. 225 00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:46,907 I've had to be the responsible one 226 00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,386 in that house my entire life. 227 00:10:48,473 --> 00:10:50,519 It's not fair. Do you think it's fair? 228 00:10:50,606 --> 00:10:51,520 Uh, I don't know. 229 00:10:51,607 --> 00:10:52,782 Well, don't you have an opinion? 230 00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:54,392 - No ma'am, I do not. - Why not? 231 00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,046 Because that "pie-hole" comment 232 00:10:56,133 --> 00:10:58,658 kind of knocked the marbles out of my bag. 233 00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:00,181 One, two, three. 234 00:11:00,268 --> 00:11:02,618 - Two, two, three. - Eyes up. 235 00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:04,054 How am I supposed to know what my feet are doing? 236 00:11:06,274 --> 00:11:07,928 I'm the only adult living there. 237 00:11:08,015 --> 00:11:09,625 I have to make sure the bills get paid 238 00:11:09,712 --> 00:11:12,497 I have to maintain the house and work a full-time job. 239 00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:14,064 And if it wasn't for me, those two would be living 240 00:11:14,151 --> 00:11:16,371 in a dumpster, fighting cats for chicken bones. 241 00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:20,288 - Eyes up. - Yeah, I got it. 242 00:11:20,375 --> 00:11:22,246 I'm gonna dry-gulch that broad. 243 00:11:24,814 --> 00:11:27,208 You know what? I'm done being the responsible one. 244 00:11:27,295 --> 00:11:29,253 They can live their lives however they want. 245 00:11:29,340 --> 00:11:31,995 Different man every night, wine glasses in the shower 246 00:11:32,082 --> 00:11:33,605 I don't care anymore. 247 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:36,347 They think I'm too controlling, well, no more. 248 00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:38,219 So you think maybe I could lead for a little while? 249 00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:39,699 Oh, yeah, sorry. 250 00:11:43,398 --> 00:11:45,356 [laughs] 251 00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:46,662 Hey, you know what would be a great first dance 252 00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:47,707 at the wedding? 253 00:11:47,794 --> 00:11:49,230 The limbo. 254 00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:51,101 - You can't do the limbo. - Doesn't matter. 255 00:11:51,188 --> 00:11:52,712 Bride and groom hold the stick. 256 00:11:54,539 --> 00:11:56,280 There you are. 257 00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:58,195 Well, while you've been out dancing the night away 258 00:11:58,282 --> 00:12:00,632 your sister's upstairs. packing to move out. 259 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,243 What? That's horrible. 260 00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:04,375 Please, she threatens to move out once a month. 261 00:12:04,462 --> 00:12:07,727 - She packed her bong. - Alright, I'll go talk to her. 262 00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:15,125 What family doesn't have its share of drama, huh? 263 00:12:15,212 --> 00:12:16,561 - Pie-hole. - Got it. 264 00:12:23,307 --> 00:12:26,267 Wow, you actually got moving boxes this time. 265 00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:28,748 Not your normal stomping down the stairs 266 00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:30,880 carrying a pair of shoes and a diaphragm. 267 00:12:33,709 --> 00:12:35,450 Thank you for reminding me. 268 00:12:37,017 --> 00:12:38,366 Come on. 269 00:12:38,453 --> 00:12:40,063 I know you're doing this just to get back at me. 270 00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:42,587 No, I'm not. You don't know everything. 271 00:12:42,674 --> 00:12:44,807 See, here's your stupid iPod. 272 00:12:46,809 --> 00:12:49,420 - What are you doing with it? - Thought it was my lighter. 273 00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:52,249 So who's the idiot now? 274 00:12:57,515 --> 00:12:59,039 You know, none of this would've happened 275 00:12:59,126 --> 00:13:00,910 if Molly hadn't given Victoria such a hard time 276 00:13:00,997 --> 00:13:02,303 about that creepy boy. 277 00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:03,826 Mm-hm. 278 00:13:03,913 --> 00:13:05,697 I mean, not that Molly hasn't brought home 279 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,134 her fair share of losers. 280 00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:10,050 No offense. 281 00:13:10,137 --> 00:13:11,399 Mm-hm. 282 00:13:11,486 --> 00:13:13,357 Hey, either add to the conversation 283 00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:15,577 or go wait in the garage with all the other tools. 284 00:13:18,623 --> 00:13:20,234 You really want my opinion? 285 00:13:20,321 --> 00:13:21,801 'Cause, you know, it's gonna come out of my pie-hole. 286 00:13:25,630 --> 00:13:28,329 - Spill it. - Alright. 287 00:13:28,416 --> 00:13:30,113 I think Molly might be a bit overprotective 288 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,594 of her sister because sometimes 289 00:13:32,681 --> 00:13:35,640 you're kinda more of a friend than a parent. 290 00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:36,990 You calling me a bad mother? 291 00:13:37,077 --> 00:13:38,513 No, I'm calling you a good friend. 292 00:13:41,385 --> 00:13:43,126 Let me tell you something, there's one parent 293 00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:45,172 in this house, and you're looking at her. 294 00:13:45,259 --> 00:13:47,522 All I hear is, "Mommy, I need this." 295 00:13:47,609 --> 00:13:51,134 "Mommy, I need that. Mommy, can I borrow $2800?" 296 00:13:51,221 --> 00:13:53,441 Wow, Victoria owes you $2800? 297 00:13:53,528 --> 00:13:55,399 No. The smart one does. 298 00:13:59,142 --> 00:14:02,015 Oh, come on, Victoria, stop this. 299 00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:04,408 You know I love you and I just want what's best for you. 300 00:14:04,495 --> 00:14:07,803 Well, then you need to let this eagle soar. 301 00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:09,587 I am not trying to keep you from soaring. 302 00:14:09,674 --> 00:14:10,719 I'm trying to keep you from flying 303 00:14:10,806 --> 00:14:12,329 into a homeless shelter. 304 00:14:12,416 --> 00:14:13,896 I have to move out of here 305 00:14:13,983 --> 00:14:15,724 or you'll never treat me like an adult. 306 00:14:15,811 --> 00:14:18,814 That's not true, I just want you to make smarter choices. 307 00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:22,252 Molly, the smart choices are not always the right choices. 308 00:14:24,167 --> 00:14:27,562 - Yeah, they kind of are. - Here we go. 309 00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:29,564 It's just like Mike said, you're a pit bull 310 00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:31,958 and I gotta get as far away from you as I can. 311 00:14:33,698 --> 00:14:36,049 Mike said that? 312 00:14:36,136 --> 00:14:38,442 Let me tell you something, if-if I had a dollar 313 00:14:38,529 --> 00:14:40,357 for every time Molly wanted to borrow money from me 314 00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:43,317 she'd wanna borrow that, too. 315 00:14:43,404 --> 00:14:45,580 Alright, Victoria's moving out. 316 00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:46,755 Mike, why don't you help her 317 00:14:46,842 --> 00:14:48,931 since this was your brilliant idea? 318 00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:50,890 - What?! - You told my baby to move out? 319 00:14:50,977 --> 00:14:52,456 - God, no. - Oh! 320 00:14:52,543 --> 00:14:54,806 Don't remember telling the eagle to soar, huh? 321 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:57,418 How about calling yourfiance a pit bull? 322 00:14:57,505 --> 00:15:01,117 Now, before you see it as a bad thing.. 323 00:15:01,204 --> 00:15:03,641 Pit bulls are actually sweet, loving dogs. 324 00:15:03,728 --> 00:15:06,166 It's the owners who make them mean. 325 00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:09,473 Is that another shot at how I raised my kids? 326 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:11,649 God, no. 327 00:15:11,736 --> 00:15:14,261 Mom, I love you, but I have to do this. 328 00:15:17,220 --> 00:15:18,743 It's the only way, right, Mike? 329 00:15:18,830 --> 00:15:20,310 Ooh, look, Victoria 330 00:15:20,397 --> 00:15:22,704 if this is about our conversation on the front porch 331 00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:23,792 you shouldn't pay any attention to me. 332 00:15:23,879 --> 00:15:25,446 I really got my head up my ass. 333 00:15:25,533 --> 00:15:28,101 It'd sure fit. 334 00:15:28,188 --> 00:15:30,364 And why are you listening to him in the first place? 335 00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:33,410 Contrary to popular opinion, Molly 336 00:15:33,497 --> 00:15:36,283 I'm the parent in this house. 337 00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:38,415 You told her what I said? 338 00:15:38,502 --> 00:15:40,243 Hey, some people aren't good with secrets 339 00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:42,811 some people aren't good with money. 340 00:15:42,898 --> 00:15:45,292 Pie-hole! 341 00:15:45,379 --> 00:15:47,772 I told you I would pay you back with our wedding money. 342 00:15:47,859 --> 00:15:49,339 Wait, you're already spending our wedding money? 343 00:15:49,426 --> 00:15:51,211 Mike, now is not the time! 344 00:15:52,734 --> 00:15:54,301 And I don't appreciate you gossiping 345 00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:55,911 about me to myfiance. 346 00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:58,044 Oh, I'm sorry, mommy. 347 00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:00,046 Are you gonna send me to bed without any supper? 348 00:16:00,133 --> 00:16:03,223 What difference would it make? You drink your dinner, anyway! 349 00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:04,964 Hey, I am the one moving out. 350 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:07,444 This is supposed to be about me! 351 00:16:07,531 --> 00:16:09,272 See, I told you, it's all for show! 352 00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:11,753 Oh, I know that! But a good mother fakes concern! 353 00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:14,408 Stop it! Stop it! You're tearing me apart! 354 00:16:21,328 --> 00:16:23,983 And just so you know, I've had exactly two glasses of wine! 355 00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:27,682 Those aren't glasses, they're aquariums with stems! 356 00:16:27,769 --> 00:16:29,118 [Joyce] 'Hey, if it wasn't for the wine' 357 00:16:29,205 --> 00:16:30,815 'the two of you wouldn't even be here.' 358 00:16:30,902 --> 00:16:31,903 [Molly] 'Yeah? With the way you drink' 359 00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,644 'I should have 15 sisters!' 360 00:16:35,342 --> 00:16:37,779 Don't worry, Molly. You'd still be the smart one! 361 00:16:37,866 --> 00:16:40,651 [glass shatters] 362 00:16:40,738 --> 00:16:42,653 [Victoria] 'Why do we even have a lamp there?' 363 00:16:51,749 --> 00:16:54,491 [sighs] 364 00:16:54,578 --> 00:16:56,189 I can't go back in there, Carl. 365 00:16:56,276 --> 00:16:57,494 I've made a mess of things 366 00:16:57,581 --> 00:16:59,496 and two of them have seen me wet and naked. 367 00:17:01,498 --> 00:17:02,934 Lot of victims in that scenario. 368 00:17:06,155 --> 00:17:07,504 But look, this is the life you've chosen 369 00:17:07,591 --> 00:17:09,376 so suck it up and get in that house. 370 00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:11,552 - Will you come in with me? - Hell, no. 371 00:17:12,596 --> 00:17:14,337 Can I come home with you? 372 00:17:14,424 --> 00:17:16,774 Man, cowardice does not become you. 373 00:17:16,861 --> 00:17:19,081 This is what being in a relationship is all about. 374 00:17:19,168 --> 00:17:20,691 You know, you're not just marrying her 375 00:17:20,778 --> 00:17:22,345 you're marrying all three of them crazy bitches. 376 00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:26,436 What happened to my life? 377 00:17:26,523 --> 00:17:29,396 I'm living in a nuthouse, I gotta shower in a jock strap 378 00:17:29,483 --> 00:17:32,747 and dance class was the highlight of my week. 379 00:17:32,834 --> 00:17:34,183 You're also gonna get to spend the rest of your life 380 00:17:34,270 --> 00:17:35,706 with the woman that you love. 381 00:17:35,793 --> 00:17:37,273 And yeah, there's gonna be some ups and downs 382 00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:41,016 but all in all, you're one lucky man. 383 00:17:41,103 --> 00:17:43,192 Yeah, I guess you're right. 384 00:17:43,279 --> 00:17:44,628 So strap on your helmet, cover your nuts 385 00:17:44,715 --> 00:17:46,195 and belly-crawl to the bedroom. 386 00:17:48,415 --> 00:17:50,765 I'll see you tomorrow. 387 00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:52,158 I really hope so. 388 00:17:58,251 --> 00:18:00,296 [instrumental music] 389 00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:02,777 [laughter] 390 00:18:05,214 --> 00:18:08,130 Hey, honey. Where'd you go? 391 00:18:08,217 --> 00:18:10,959 Uh, I grabbed a couple of beers with Carl. 392 00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:12,961 Mom and Victoria made some Rice Krispie Treats 393 00:18:13,048 --> 00:18:14,484 if you want a little dessert. 394 00:18:14,571 --> 00:18:16,182 Sure. 395 00:18:16,269 --> 00:18:18,532 So, everything's good? 396 00:18:18,619 --> 00:18:20,577 - Everybody's staying? - Of course. 397 00:18:20,664 --> 00:18:22,101 Where would anybody be going? 398 00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:30,283 Okay. I'm gonna grab one of those Rice Krispie Treats. 399 00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:33,938 - Have as many as you want. - You enjoy. 400 00:18:34,025 --> 00:18:36,115 [all laughing] 401 00:18:41,468 --> 00:18:43,209 What the hell kind of game are they playing? 402 00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,082 [instrumental music] 403 00:18:52,479 --> 00:18:53,393 [theme music]