1
00:00:33,878 --> 00:00:36,274
Hello and welcome to Top Gear.

2
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We are back and, as you can see,

3
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things are a little bit different.

4
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Because of Covid - pesky Covid!

5
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We can't have a studio audience,
but we've got the next best thing.

6
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That's right, Pad, they said
work from home if possible,

7
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so here we are
at the home of the BBC.

8
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Yes, the mighty Television Center.
Wonderful.

9
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You can literally smell the history,

10
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and the gin.

11
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So no audience, but we do have
our trusty production team.

12
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Hello, everybody!

13
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Yes, look at them.

14
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They've had a shave and a wash
and everything. It's fantastic.

15
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And we've got a few locals up in
the flats. Hello, there, everybody!

16
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Hello! Right up the top.

17
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We won't be long. Get the kettle on.

18
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Imagine settling down to your dinner

19
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and finding Paddy McGuinness
yelling outside your window. Lucky.

20
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It's probably a good time to put
a low offer on one of these flats.

21
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Looking round, a few of them
have shut the curtains, Pad.

22
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Now, the BBC wants to make clear -

23
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us three,
we've been Covid tested... Yep.

24
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...we're bubbled up,

25
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so we're officially allowed
to be nice and close.

26
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I've got to be honest - I prefer
the social distancing. Sorry.

27
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Anyhow, things might be
a bit different,

28
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but we've still been hard at work
messing around in cars

29
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and have we got a belter of a series
lined up for you.

30
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Here's what's in store.

31
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Have you got high heels on?
Why are you walking like that?

32
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Can we do this, please?

33
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No, no, no, no.
Slow down, slow down.

34
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That is ridiculous!

35
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Aye-aye, Captain.

36
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Just look at these.

37
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Stop.

38
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Have you got an earring in? Yeah.

39
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I like it.

40
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Geez, what a sight!

41
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Brake. Brake. What are you doing?
I'm braking.

42
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Have a bit of smoke, gentlemen.

43
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I'm not in character here.

44
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Well, at least
we've still got our dignity.

45
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It's so fast!

46
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All over the place.

47
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Mamma Mia! Here we go again!

48
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Exciting. Exciting. Exciting.

49
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All that coming up
over the next few weeks,

50
00:03:22,939 --> 00:03:27,064
but tonight it's time to slip on
the old rose-tinted spectacles -

51
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you already have... Thank you.

52
00:03:28,658 --> 00:03:30,764
...to talk about memorable cars.

53
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Because we reckon
the most important car in your life

54
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isn't the one you learn to drive in,
or the first car you bought.

55
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No, it's your dad's car. Yes!

56
00:03:37,768 --> 00:03:39,665
The one you sat in the back of
as a kid.

57
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So, to celebrate the most memorable
cars of all, the producers said,

58
00:03:42,858 --> 00:03:46,045
'"Tell us what your dads drove,
we'll find the nearest thing we can,

59
00:03:46,069 --> 00:03:48,049
' "you get yourselves to Cumbria.'"

60
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Our trip down memory lane

61
00:04:03,898 --> 00:04:07,584
would be set against
the rugged, ancient backdrop

62
00:04:07,608 --> 00:04:09,168
of the Lake District...

63
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...where, on a remote farm,

64
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we'd been told to meet up
for a very special reunion.

65
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Here we go.

66
00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:25,224
Are you excited? I am excited.
Yeah, me too.

67
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I mean, this is a big moment.

68
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Oh, look at this, boys.

69
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Aaah! DOOR SCRAPES NOISILY

70
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Oh, my ears.

71
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I think I know mine. Really?

72
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Come on, then. Shall I?
Yeah, go on, go on, go on.

73
00:04:40,248 --> 00:04:41,777
Why am I so excited?

74
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Cos it's your dad's car.
Your dad's car was everything.

75
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Take it off! When you were a kid,
it was everything. Take it off!

76
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,846
Boys, it's the legendary..

77
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...Cortina.

78
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20th Century Boy by T. Rex

79
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What do you think? Beautiful.
I love a Cortina.

80
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,976
Is that a brown interior as well?

81
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:09,150
Yeah. It doesn't get more '70s.

82
00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:13,136
1.6 GL. THE car.

83
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It just oozes dad.

84
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It's just a dad car, innit?

85
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It's a proper rolling up,

86
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arm out the window, here's my dad.

87
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My mum and dad used to sleep in it.

88
00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:28,576
When we were at the cricket...
Too much information! No!

89
00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:31,336
What happened was I used to stay
in hotels with the teams and that.

90
00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:33,616
And they would...?
I only found out years later

91
00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:35,897
that my mum and dad
used to sleep in the car a lot

92
00:05:35,921 --> 00:05:38,240
cos they couldn't afford
hotel rooms and things.

93
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I don't know what to say
to that, Fred. Yeah.

94
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Look at this.

95
00:05:49,510 --> 00:05:52,256
If my dad saw this,
he would be so happy.

96
00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:55,256
Can I say one thing,
Mr Flintoff? Yeah.

97
00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:58,486
You've a reputation for bending
things. You're not bending this.

98
00:05:58,510 --> 00:06:02,276
I'm not going anywhere near.
No chance. No way.

99
00:06:02,300 --> 00:06:06,726
Go on, who's next? Shall we have
a go? Yeah, go on. What have we got?

100
00:06:06,750 --> 00:06:08,926
Father To Son by Queen

101
00:06:08,950 --> 00:06:11,266
Oh, of course it was yellow,
of course it was!

102
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Come on, boys! Here we go!

103
00:06:17,590 --> 00:06:21,200
Bring on the sunshine. Did every
bloke in the North have a Ford?

104
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That is a honey. Look at this.

105
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I would have a go about it
being yellow but it works.

106
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Yeah, because it was
built in Seville, that.

107
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Those lads out there -
a bit of sunshine on their back,

108
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a couple of sangrias,
it fitted. It does.

109
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It's only
when they got made over here

110
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they all came out as brown and Grey.

111
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Do you know, this car -
my earliest memories of this car

112
00:06:44,210 --> 00:06:46,136
what make me smile
was not being in it.

113
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When my dad used to pick me up
at the weekend,

114
00:06:48,430 --> 00:06:50,366
he'd roll up outside our house

115
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and he'd always drive over
the grid in the front of our house

116
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and it made a certain
clanking noise.

117
00:06:55,070 --> 00:06:57,816
Whenever I hear it now
it just makes me smile,

118
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so when I think about his car,

119
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I think about him
driving over that grid.

120
00:07:01,801 --> 00:07:05,006
But the years I spent
sat in the passenger side.

121
00:07:05,030 --> 00:07:06,496
I never went in the back.

122
00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,726
I was always... Why? Just...

123
00:07:08,750 --> 00:07:11,016
I just wanted to be
up front with my dad.

124
00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:15,446
I wanted to be out there,
and back then you were allowed.

125
00:07:15,470 --> 00:07:16,897
Seat belt on, or not?

126
00:07:16,921 --> 00:07:19,446
Please! In the '80s?

127
00:07:19,470 --> 00:07:21,976
Paddy, just come here and just see
this angle of the two Fords.

128
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,777
Look at it. It's beautiful.
Look at them.

129
00:07:23,801 --> 00:07:26,496
Let's get down here
and have a look at that. Yes.

130
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,767
If that is an Escort or a Granada,
we've got the full set.

131
00:07:29,791 --> 00:07:33,206
Funny feeling I might
disappoint you here. Oh. Here we go.

132
00:07:33,230 --> 00:07:35,286
Come on. Granada. Sierra. Sierra.

133
00:07:35,310 --> 00:07:36,787
I 'd love a Sierra.

134
00:07:36,811 --> 00:07:40,976
It could be a Sierra. It's not, is
it? Did you see? Different country.

135
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:43,086
Straight away!

136
00:07:43,110 --> 00:07:45,520
Heroes by David Bowie

137
00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:49,870
Geez. E21 323i.

138
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Look at these. You've got
windscreen wipers on the headlights.

139
00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:03,166
Oh, my lord. Do you know what?

140
00:08:03,190 --> 00:08:04,907
I'm not often lost for words,

141
00:08:04,931 --> 00:08:10,446
but that's my entire childhood back
in one piece. I just adored these.

142
00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:12,856
140 horsepower in the late '70s.
Wow.

143
00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,166
Rear-wheel drive. And I was...

144
00:08:15,190 --> 00:08:18,086
What are you thinking now you're
seeing it? What are you thinking?

145
00:08:18,110 --> 00:08:21,936
I'm trying quite hard not to cry.
Honestly? Oh, mate. Fantastic.

146
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,806
And I never...
You know I've got a few cars,

147
00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:27,536
but I've never bought one of these
cos it was my dad's car.

148
00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:29,866
I've never driven one.
You've never driven one?

149
00:08:29,890 --> 00:08:32,266
I've never sat in the driver's seat
cos I don't think I'm...

150
00:08:32,290 --> 00:08:34,816
I don't think I deserve to cos
it's my dad's car. Get in.

151
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:35,880
Go on, Chris.

152
00:08:37,290 --> 00:08:39,256
Get in. Look at this.

153
00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:41,907
Paddy, that's a nice car. Yeah.

154
00:08:41,931 --> 00:08:44,366
That is a lovely car. 323i.

155
00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:48,166
It's absolutely gorgeous, lads.
Is it?

156
00:08:48,190 --> 00:08:50,040
And I remember
the clock faces and...

157
00:08:51,551 --> 00:08:54,806
So you never sat in the driver's
seat of it? Never got to drive it?

158
00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:56,016
I wasn't allowed to.

159
00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:58,376
I wasn't allowed to touch
the heater controls or anything

160
00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:00,446
cos it was Dad's. Dad's car.
Pride and joy?

161
00:09:00,470 --> 00:09:02,806
You don't mess with Dad's car.
It's...

162
00:09:02,830 --> 00:09:06,626
It was a space that was not to
be touched. It was to be respected,

163
00:09:06,650 --> 00:09:09,336
and if you went anywhere near
any of it, you were in trouble.

164
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:11,926
Yeah. Don't even think
about touching the radio. No.

165
00:09:11,950 --> 00:09:13,787
Don't even think about
touching the radio.

166
00:09:13,811 --> 00:09:15,787
I'm getting the smells,
I'm getting the smiles,

167
00:09:15,811 --> 00:09:18,636
I'm getting the arguments.
I'm getting the frustrations.

168
00:09:18,660 --> 00:09:21,376
I'm getting the... All of it,
and it comes through a car.

169
00:09:21,400 --> 00:09:22,561
How do cars do that?

170
00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:26,647
Do you want me to give you
a few...? Oh!

171
00:09:26,671 --> 00:09:28,917
It's got the optional
five-speed gearbox.

172
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:35,216
Won't Get Fooled Again
by The Who

173
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,016
Look at this.

174
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,006
Seat belt on.

175
00:09:39,030 --> 00:09:41,470
I'm actually quite nervous
about starting it up.

176
00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:45,480
Right...

177
00:09:46,890 --> 00:09:50,160
I'm actually going to start up
my dad's car.

178
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:52,270
Here we go.

179
00:09:53,530 --> 00:09:54,880
Ignition on.

180
00:10:07,410 --> 00:10:09,240
Oh, there we go!

181
00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:15,986
Look at the exhaust fumes
out the back of that Cortina.

182
00:10:16,010 --> 00:10:18,170
First gear, handbrake off.

183
00:10:19,600 --> 00:10:20,890
Sorry, Dad.

184
00:10:27,310 --> 00:10:30,256
Oh, my word! I'm so happy.

185
00:10:32,551 --> 00:10:34,056
Yes!

186
00:10:38,170 --> 00:10:41,960
The sound of that straight six!
That's the sound...

187
00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:44,270
...of my childhood.

188
00:10:46,650 --> 00:10:48,816
We were on our way,

189
00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:51,280
and exactly where
wasn't important...

190
00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:55,456
...because, for once, we hadn't
been told to head straight

191
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,000
to the nearest racetrack
or airfield.

192
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:03,446
Instead, we'd been told
to just soak up the memories

193
00:11:03,470 --> 00:11:05,811
and see where they'd take us.

194
00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:10,657
Lads, now, obviously,
your dad's your dad

195
00:11:10,681 --> 00:11:13,866
and your mum's your mum
and we all refer to our dads as Dad,

196
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:15,366
but they have names.

197
00:11:15,390 --> 00:11:17,146
What were your dads' names?

198
00:11:17,170 --> 00:11:19,527
My dad was called Ian Harris.

199
00:11:19,551 --> 00:11:22,416
My dad's called Colin.
Yes! I like it.

200
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,176
Ian and Colin,
and my dad were called Joe.

201
00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:27,826
Three proper dad names.

202
00:11:27,850 --> 00:11:30,640
Brilliant. Brilliant names.

203
00:11:32,050 --> 00:11:35,040
For Benjamin by Helmuth Franke

204
00:11:38,830 --> 00:11:41,866
My dad - he started off life
as a coalminer,

205
00:11:41,890 --> 00:11:44,657
so he worked down the pits, my dad,

206
00:11:44,681 --> 00:11:50,456
and he had these big man's hands -
big thick veins on the back,

207
00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:52,936
and this steering wheel is so tiny

208
00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,616
and so thin,
even my hands look big on it,

209
00:11:55,640 --> 00:12:01,216
so my dad's hands? God, it was like
Andre the Giant driving the car.

210
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:04,320
Oh, I just loved being in the car
with my dad. Loved it.

211
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:10,456
You know what I'm going to do?

212
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:13,066
To pay homage to my dad,
I'm going to put glasses on.

213
00:12:13,090 --> 00:12:14,270
There we go.

214
00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,896
Now that is a look.
Just call me Colin.

215
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:21,170
Oh, I love that!

216
00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,320
The more I drive, the more memories
are coming flooding back.

217
00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:34,537
Just wanted to be a cricketer.
That's all I wanted to do.

218
00:12:34,561 --> 00:12:36,896
I wanted to play for Lancashire,

219
00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:40,840
and then maybe -
maybe just maybe - play for England.

220
00:12:42,090 --> 00:12:45,080
And this is the car that took me
to all the matches as a kid.

221
00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:50,466
The conversations we had in this car
with my dad about cricket.

222
00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:53,136
Even daft stuff
like opening the boot

223
00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,686
and all my cricket kit's in there,
my bat -

224
00:12:55,710 --> 00:12:59,936
my first one, my V12
I bought myself, 21.50 Slazenger.

225
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:03,561
My pads from Hamleys toy shop in
London where my Auntie Joan took me.

226
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:06,200
Ah, it's bonkers.

227
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,527
Do you two just find yourselves
just looking round the car,

228
00:13:10,551 --> 00:13:12,426
then all these different
memories come back

229
00:13:12,450 --> 00:13:13,976
with different things you see?

230
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:16,886
Everything -
every button, every switch -

231
00:13:16,910 --> 00:13:18,530
brings back a memory for me.

232
00:13:23,710 --> 00:13:25,306
The strange situation
in my household

233
00:13:25,330 --> 00:13:29,606
was that this was my dad's car,
the 323i, and he was -

234
00:13:29,630 --> 00:13:33,240
and I'm sorry to say this, Pa -
he was quite an average driver.

235
00:13:34,270 --> 00:13:37,136
My mum could really drive.
My mum was a rally driver,

236
00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,016
so for me
the perfect combination

237
00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,016
was to be collected
from a party or school

238
00:13:42,040 --> 00:13:44,896
in my dad's car with Mum driving,

239
00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:48,506
and then I always knew
we were in for a ride,

240
00:13:48,530 --> 00:13:52,016
and she would drive it
like an absolute lunatic.

241
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,586
A bit of lock on, wet roads.

242
00:13:54,610 --> 00:13:57,046
In fact, I can remember
another friend's dad

243
00:13:57,070 --> 00:14:00,256
making a woman Driver joke
and thinking, or assuming,

244
00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:02,667
that meant that
that was a really good driver

245
00:14:02,691 --> 00:14:06,360
cos in my household it was the mum
that could really pedal.

246
00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:14,026
I tell you what, boys,
do you remember as kids

247
00:14:14,050 --> 00:14:17,746
peering through the window
and seeing how far the speedo went?

248
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,586
I used to love that.

249
00:14:19,610 --> 00:14:22,896
And you just presume the car
will do that speed.

250
00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:27,866
I have a potential maximum
on my speedometer of 140mph.

251
00:14:27,890 --> 00:14:29,306
Ooh!

252
00:14:29,330 --> 00:14:34,667
Snap, Chris. Mine also says 140mph.

253
00:14:34,691 --> 00:14:40,240
Well, mine says 100, and that is
very, very, very optimistic.

254
00:14:42,170 --> 00:14:45,720
What we needed, funnily enough,
was an airfield...

255
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:51,826
...where, in honor of the universal
truth that as a kid your dad's car

256
00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:54,586
would always go
as fast as the speedo showed,

257
00:14:54,610 --> 00:14:59,000
we'd now see which of ours could
get closest to their magic number.

258
00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:04,537
Technically, lads,
this isn't even a drag race, is it?

259
00:15:04,561 --> 00:15:06,746
We could have done this separately.

260
00:15:06,770 --> 00:15:08,056
This saves a load of time

261
00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:11,146
and cuts out the boring bit
of your car doing it on its own.

262
00:15:11,170 --> 00:15:13,336
Just pointing out the facts.

263
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:16,330
Gypsy by Uriah Heap

264
00:15:19,060 --> 00:15:21,400
I'll be pleased
if I can get to 50...

265
00:15:24,610 --> 00:15:27,026
...and that's being ambitious.

266
00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:36,826
Here we go.

267
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,540
I'm off!
First moral victory for the Fiesta!

268
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:48,360
Watch this. Watch this.

269
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:54,407
Oh, there he goes. Wow!

270
00:15:54,431 --> 00:15:56,516
Look at that go!

271
00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:57,537
70.

272
00:15:57,561 --> 00:15:59,800
This feels like a modern car. 80.

273
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:04,720
40mph!

274
00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:11,506
60. Come on, the Cortina. I'm
starting to wobble a little bit.

275
00:16:11,530 --> 00:16:13,466
90.

276
00:16:13,490 --> 00:16:17,456
Nearly 100 already. I mean,
they're specks. They are specks.

277
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:18,986
Oh, hang on.

278
00:16:19,010 --> 00:16:21,160
60? That's a surprise.

279
00:16:22,770 --> 00:16:24,776
Go on, baby!

280
00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:26,780
Keep going, keep going.

281
00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:31,080
105, 110.

282
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:35,976
I mean, that's outrageous.

283
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,691
80, 80.

284
00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:40,330
85.

285
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,496
Can I get 65?

286
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,571
Go on, go on, go on.

287
00:16:46,710 --> 00:16:48,150
65!

288
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:54,746
Wow!

289
00:16:54,770 --> 00:16:57,906
And that, gentlemen,
is why, in the early '80s,

290
00:16:57,930 --> 00:17:00,336
you paid a bit extra for a 323i.

291
00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:03,616
What did you get to?
She was still pulling at 110.

292
00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:06,417
85. Paddy?

293
00:17:06,441 --> 00:17:08,186
Let me just get this right.

294
00:17:08,210 --> 00:17:14,466
I've got 100 so I got 65,
so I'm within 35mph of my top speed.

295
00:17:14,490 --> 00:17:17,236
What did you get? 112.

296
00:17:17,260 --> 00:17:19,746
What's your top speed? 140.

297
00:17:19,770 --> 00:17:23,216
I know you think you've got
one here, but you haven't. Swine.

298
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:26,226
All you've done is expose
the fact that you can't add up.

299
00:17:26,250 --> 00:17:28,206
I think you've pipped me,
though, Paddy.

300
00:17:28,230 --> 00:17:30,946
I honestly thought yours
would give a bit more, Fred.

301
00:17:30,970 --> 00:17:33,547
Me too, but never mind
about top speeds -

302
00:17:33,571 --> 00:17:35,970
dads driving, all about reversing.

303
00:17:37,050 --> 00:17:39,026
Reversing?

304
00:17:39,050 --> 00:17:40,547
Oh, yes.

305
00:17:40,571 --> 00:17:41,720
The great leveller.

306
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:46,906
I wanted to test the superpower
that every dad must have,

307
00:17:46,930 --> 00:17:49,466
no matter what they drive.

308
00:17:49,490 --> 00:17:50,856
What are you doing?

309
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:54,626
Straight-line reverse,
slalom all the way back round,

310
00:17:54,650 --> 00:17:56,186
then straight-line reverse here.

311
00:17:56,210 --> 00:17:58,667
Fastest wins. Dad driving.

312
00:17:58,691 --> 00:18:01,980
I don't remember my dad reversing
around hay bales, but I'll do it.

313
00:18:03,510 --> 00:18:05,667
And with the course laid out,

314
00:18:05,691 --> 00:18:09,256
I decided to show them
how it was done.

315
00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:12,186
With those glasses on
and that jumper in that car,

316
00:18:12,210 --> 00:18:15,306
he looks like an ITV documentary

317
00:18:15,330 --> 00:18:18,667
remaking some hideous serial killer.

318
00:18:21,210 --> 00:18:24,506
Three, two, one, go!

319
00:18:26,850 --> 00:18:28,866
We're off.

320
00:18:28,890 --> 00:18:32,036
Old dad technique,
arm over the shoulder.

321
00:18:32,060 --> 00:18:33,456
This is very Sweeney.

322
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:36,547
It is very Sweeney.
Vroom! Round it goes.

323
00:18:36,571 --> 00:18:38,427
Get round, get round.

324
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:39,826
The pressure's on.

325
00:18:39,850 --> 00:18:41,626
By rights, you should win this. Why?

326
00:18:41,650 --> 00:18:44,547
You're in the faster car
for a kick-off.

327
00:18:46,010 --> 00:18:48,056
I'm getting dizzy. Whoa!

328
00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:50,466
Why would they make this
a faster car in reverse?

329
00:18:50,490 --> 00:18:52,417
Because it's German.
They do that, don't they?

330
00:18:52,441 --> 00:18:55,256
It's down to driver skill, so you're
right - I probably should win it.

331
00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:57,547
Backwards, backwards, backwards.

332
00:18:57,571 --> 00:19:00,230
Go, go, go, go, go, go.

333
00:19:01,451 --> 00:19:03,720
This could be interesting.
I don't fancy this.

334
00:19:06,330 --> 00:19:09,226
Ooh! That's unnecessary.
He's flat spotted those.

335
00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:14,336
How'd I do? 51 seconds.
That looked very good.

336
00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:17,496
Do you know the thing about
the Mark IV Cortina, Chris? What?

337
00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:21,336
It's got 15%%% more visibility
than the Mark I I I. Has it?

338
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:23,066
Thought you'd like that.
There you go.

339
00:19:23,090 --> 00:19:25,936
You've been knocking about with him
for too long.

340
00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:29,106
It's a car show, Paddy. We shouldn't
be scared to deliver stats.

341
00:19:34,290 --> 00:19:38,346
With a whole lot of dad pride on the
line, McGuinness was up next...

342
00:19:38,370 --> 00:19:40,506
Have you got the stopwatch? Yeah.

343
00:19:40,530 --> 00:19:42,386
...and things were getting serious.

344
00:19:42,410 --> 00:19:44,986
Whoa. Whoa. What?

345
00:19:45,010 --> 00:19:46,336
What's up with you? What?

346
00:19:46,360 --> 00:19:48,346
Pass that BLEEP stopwatch over. No!

347
00:19:50,220 --> 00:19:51,826
No! No!

348
00:19:51,850 --> 00:19:53,986
I'm timing you. No.
I'm timing you. No.

349
00:19:54,010 --> 00:19:57,116
I want Harris on the stopwatch.
Sit down. He did Fred's.

350
00:19:57,140 --> 00:20:00,476
I'm not having you doing it.
Get in your car. Pass it over.

351
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:02,746
I'm a father. I'm a dad. Bollocks!

352
00:20:02,770 --> 00:20:06,290
The glasses aren't fooling anyone.
Pass it over.

353
00:20:08,420 --> 00:20:10,106
OK, go.

354
00:20:10,130 --> 00:20:11,930
Pretend you've got it.

355
00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:15,960
Just as he goes, hold it up, right?

356
00:20:18,060 --> 00:20:20,616
Three, two, one, go!

357
00:20:20,640 --> 00:20:21,856
You...! THEY LAUGH

358
00:20:26,370 --> 00:20:28,946
Oh, he's going for it. Whoa!

359
00:20:28,970 --> 00:20:30,370
I feel ill.

360
00:20:31,420 --> 00:20:34,916
He's trying to go both ways.
It doesn't work.

361
00:20:38,170 --> 00:20:40,170
Whoa! I've given myself whiplash!

362
00:20:41,690 --> 00:20:43,960
TYRES SQUEAL Whoa!

363
00:20:45,130 --> 00:20:47,290
What happened then?

364
00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:55,650
What do you reckon you got?

365
00:20:56,740 --> 00:21:00,066
Faster than you.
You did, by half a second.

366
00:21:00,090 --> 00:21:02,490
Shut up! 50.72.

367
00:21:03,730 --> 00:21:06,146
I was convinced it was sub 50.
That...

368
00:21:06,170 --> 00:21:08,656
That's a demonstration of honesty
from Andrew Flintoff.

369
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:11,506
Do you know what?
We're in a bubble. We can.

370
00:21:13,850 --> 00:21:16,425
It's nice being honest, isn't it?
It's what happens.

371
00:21:16,449 --> 00:21:19,155
We all get on when we're
being honest. Go on, Chris. Get in.

372
00:21:19,179 --> 00:21:22,155
I think he's going to beat you.
Can I say before I start...? Oh! Oh!

373
00:21:22,179 --> 00:21:24,249
No, no, you can't say anything.
Get in.

374
00:21:25,769 --> 00:21:28,715
Three, two, one, go!

375
00:21:30,089 --> 00:21:32,009
Whoa! Whoa!

376
00:21:33,099 --> 00:21:34,935
OK. Brake, brake, brake, brake.

377
00:21:34,959 --> 00:21:36,935
What's his dad going to say?

378
00:21:36,959 --> 00:21:38,775
Now to the right. That's good.

379
00:21:38,799 --> 00:21:39,995
TYRES SCREECH Oh!

380
00:21:40,019 --> 00:21:41,225
Yeah, he's quick, he's quick.

381
00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:44,849
Oh, he's pressed the horn.
A honk of the horn. Get out the way!

382
00:21:46,089 --> 00:21:48,265
Whoa!

383
00:21:48,289 --> 00:21:49,905
Oh!

384
00:21:49,929 --> 00:21:50,935
And brake.

385
00:21:52,649 --> 00:21:53,939
This is going to be slick.

386
00:21:59,599 --> 00:22:02,865
That's his dad's car.
Why's he doing that?

387
00:22:02,889 --> 00:22:05,416
All this chat about
looking after my dad's car -

388
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,935
the blue smoke was coming,
you nearly hit a bale down here.

389
00:22:08,959 --> 00:22:10,585
What did we get to?

390
00:22:10,609 --> 00:22:12,905
41...

391
00:22:12,929 --> 00:22:14,625
...point 94.

392
00:22:14,649 --> 00:22:18,025
To be expected in that. Wait there.

393
00:22:18,049 --> 00:22:20,575
That's an annihilation.
That's an annihilation.

394
00:22:20,599 --> 00:22:22,585
Do you know what that was, Chris?
What?

395
00:22:22,609 --> 00:22:26,105
A complete lack of respect
for your dad's car. Yeah.

396
00:22:26,129 --> 00:22:27,865
We were testing you.

397
00:22:27,889 --> 00:22:30,416
Unbelievable. Yeah.

398
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:33,115
Children Of The Revolution
by T. Rex

399
00:22:33,139 --> 00:22:38,275
So first dad car bragging rights
to the Harrises.

400
00:22:38,299 --> 00:22:43,320
But then, it has to be said,
the BMW 323i always was...

401
00:22:45,399 --> 00:22:47,019
...a very special car.

402
00:22:48,580 --> 00:22:52,855
Think about it - it's a small,
compact rear-wheel-drive saloon car

403
00:22:52,879 --> 00:22:54,585
with nearly 150 horsepower,

404
00:22:54,609 --> 00:22:57,665
2.3 litre fuel-injected inline-six.

405
00:22:57,689 --> 00:23:00,865
You can always tell a six cylinder
by having four lights at the front,

406
00:23:00,889 --> 00:23:05,355
but the 323i had twin exhausts
either side at the back.

407
00:23:05,379 --> 00:23:08,306
I remember my father turning up
with one and saying,

408
00:23:08,330 --> 00:23:10,179
' "Oh, it's got the twin exhaust.'"

409
00:23:11,739 --> 00:23:14,099
Cor, I was a lucky boy.

410
00:23:18,889 --> 00:23:22,739
How are they driving, boys? Fred,
I've lucked in here. It's gorgeous.

411
00:23:24,570 --> 00:23:28,355
I've got to tell you - the Cortina
is running like an absolute dream.

412
00:23:28,379 --> 00:23:31,369
I've not stopped smiling
since I've started driving.

413
00:23:34,019 --> 00:23:37,416
All right, the 1.6 GL's
whopping 70 horsepower

414
00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:40,659
would never be enough to take on
Harris' Beamer at the lights...

415
00:23:45,179 --> 00:23:47,879
...but that doesn't matter.
It's a Cortina...

416
00:23:49,689 --> 00:23:51,729
...and that makes it an icon.

417
00:23:53,580 --> 00:23:56,345
You don't see many Cortinas
knocking about these days,

418
00:23:56,369 --> 00:23:59,689
but back in the day
these were everywhere.

419
00:24:00,739 --> 00:24:02,945
It was the biggest-selling
British car of the '70s,

420
00:24:02,969 --> 00:24:04,985
and everyone drove them.

421
00:24:05,009 --> 00:24:08,426
You know, sales reps, families,
the police.

422
00:24:08,450 --> 00:24:09,769
It was the car to have.

423
00:24:12,009 --> 00:24:15,099
Well, if you're
talking about the car to have...

424
00:24:19,369 --> 00:24:22,399
...how about the UK's
bestselling car...

425
00:24:24,479 --> 00:24:26,039
...of all time?

426
00:24:27,369 --> 00:24:30,655
The Ford Fiesta.

427
00:24:30,679 --> 00:24:32,815
This car is so popular!

428
00:24:32,839 --> 00:24:34,815
Four million of these
have been sold -

429
00:24:34,839 --> 00:24:36,939
four million!

430
00:24:39,169 --> 00:24:43,689
This car is a proper British icon.

431
00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:49,409
This is where my love affair
with Ford started.

432
00:24:51,409 --> 00:24:54,899
I loved the Fiesta.
I loved everything about it.

433
00:24:58,219 --> 00:25:01,580
And that's the real beauty
of your dad's car.

434
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:06,585
Back in the day, it didn't matter
that it had a one litre engine

435
00:25:06,609 --> 00:25:08,259
and 53 horsepower.

436
00:25:09,559 --> 00:25:10,689
It was still...

437
00:25:12,519 --> 00:25:14,369
...utterly magical.

438
00:25:26,169 --> 00:25:30,995
Honestly, I used to love sitting in
the car with my dad and just dri...

439
00:25:31,019 --> 00:25:33,585
I didn't care where we were going -
as long as we were driving

440
00:25:33,609 --> 00:25:36,825
and we were on the road,
talking and laughing

441
00:25:36,849 --> 00:25:40,436
and he used to do this little thing
when he were driving, my dad,

442
00:25:40,460 --> 00:25:43,436
when he'd change the gear, he'd
grab my leg and give it a squeeze

443
00:25:43,460 --> 00:25:45,585
and it gave me
like a little electric shock,

444
00:25:45,609 --> 00:25:47,595
and he'd do it every now and again

445
00:25:47,619 --> 00:25:50,176
and I used to laugh my head off

446
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:53,385
and, cor, it was just wonderful.

447
00:25:53,409 --> 00:25:55,176
I just...

448
00:25:56,249 --> 00:25:57,875
I think we'd all give anything

449
00:25:57,899 --> 00:26:00,299
to go back to those moments in time,
you know.

450
00:26:01,809 --> 00:26:04,009
I miss them. I miss him.

451
00:26:13,659 --> 00:26:15,505
It's a funny thing,
talking about your dad

452
00:26:15,529 --> 00:26:17,105
when he's been gone a long time,

453
00:26:17,129 --> 00:26:19,995
because mine's been gone 20 years

454
00:26:20,019 --> 00:26:22,025
and I still struggle
to talk about him.

455
00:26:22,049 --> 00:26:23,995
You do. You just...

456
00:26:24,019 --> 00:26:26,025
That doesn't go away.

457
00:26:26,049 --> 00:26:29,969
So, Ian Edward Lorimer Harris...

458
00:26:31,099 --> 00:26:34,379
...I miss you lots
and I'm sorry about...

459
00:26:35,559 --> 00:26:37,385
...a lot of the driving that I do

460
00:26:37,409 --> 00:26:39,609
that you'd find inappropriate,
but...

461
00:26:42,169 --> 00:26:43,539
...I do often keep...

462
00:26:44,849 --> 00:26:48,559
...a box or a tin of barley sugars
in most of my cars.

463
00:26:49,659 --> 00:26:50,905
And I don't really eat them.

464
00:26:50,929 --> 00:26:52,795
I just buy them
because you used to have them

465
00:26:52,819 --> 00:26:55,865
and it makes me feel good
having them in the car.

466
00:26:55,889 --> 00:26:57,809
Never admitted that
in public before.

467
00:26:58,899 --> 00:27:00,029
Funny old world.

468
00:27:08,969 --> 00:27:10,515
It starts to make you think about,

469
00:27:10,539 --> 00:27:12,705
what's my kids' memories
going to be?

470
00:27:12,729 --> 00:27:14,895
You know, as a father,
you try your best, don't you?

471
00:27:14,919 --> 00:27:16,539
You try your best to provide...

472
00:27:18,049 --> 00:27:20,186
...show your kids the way,

473
00:27:20,210 --> 00:27:24,075
and you just hope you're doing
a good job. I just want to do...

474
00:27:24,099 --> 00:27:27,025
...as good a job as my dad. I don't
think I can do any better than him.

475
00:27:27,049 --> 00:27:28,995
He was amazing.

476
00:27:29,019 --> 00:27:31,179
I hope when my kids get, like,
to my age...

477
00:27:32,499 --> 00:27:35,795
...and they talk about their
childhood, they had a good one,

478
00:27:35,819 --> 00:27:38,129
and they got all the love
and support they need.

479
00:27:40,129 --> 00:27:42,089
That would be
my biggest achievement.

480
00:27:50,049 --> 00:27:52,625
Now, clearly inspired
by the way we've been

481
00:27:52,649 --> 00:27:56,165
so heartedly embracing
the dad's car brief,

482
00:27:56,189 --> 00:27:59,539
the producers had gone and cooked up
a little test of their own.

483
00:28:01,419 --> 00:28:04,225
Which, of course,
meant our trip down memory lane

484
00:28:04,249 --> 00:28:05,905
would now lead us to...

485
00:28:05,929 --> 00:28:08,129
...yes, a local racetrack.

486
00:28:17,739 --> 00:28:18,899
Right.

487
00:28:20,009 --> 00:28:23,895
'"To recreate that authentic
driving -with-your-dad experience,

488
00:28:23,919 --> 00:28:28,155
'"you will now see which of you can
get round this circuit fastest

489
00:28:28,179 --> 00:28:31,515
'"while sitting on the lap
of one of your fellow presenters.'"

490
00:28:31,539 --> 00:28:32,795
Oh...

491
00:28:32,819 --> 00:28:35,515
The question we've got to ask
ourselves here is,

492
00:28:35,539 --> 00:28:37,316
who's having Flintoff
sitting on them?

493
00:28:39,340 --> 00:28:42,929
You might have to get
that sunroof open! Oh, God!

494
00:28:46,099 --> 00:28:49,715
Yes, in a bizarre bid
to relive that giddy thrill

495
00:28:49,739 --> 00:28:53,345
of sitting on your dad's knee
for your first-ever go at the wheel,

496
00:28:53,369 --> 00:28:56,385
under the floodlights
of the Cumbria Kart Racing Club,

497
00:28:56,409 --> 00:28:59,186
we'd now take turns
steering our cars

498
00:28:59,210 --> 00:29:02,119
while sitting on each other's laps.

499
00:29:03,119 --> 00:29:04,979
You ready? Not really.

500
00:29:07,059 --> 00:29:08,905
I've got to get in.
What are you doing?

501
00:29:08,929 --> 00:29:11,395
I'm trying to move my hands!

502
00:29:11,419 --> 00:29:13,115
What is that?!

503
00:29:13,139 --> 00:29:14,755
I'm trying to get in.

504
00:29:14,779 --> 00:29:17,985
I can't get in. Try side-saddle.

505
00:29:18,009 --> 00:29:19,985
Can you get both your legs?

506
00:29:20,009 --> 00:29:22,785
Put your other leg in. Go on.
Try that.

507
00:29:24,979 --> 00:29:27,795
It doesn't work, this.
This don't work.

508
00:29:27,819 --> 00:29:30,895
Have you tried facing him?
Facing him?! That might work.

509
00:29:30,919 --> 00:29:32,235
Try that.

510
00:29:32,259 --> 00:29:33,705
No chance.

511
00:29:33,729 --> 00:29:37,105
But after completely
relocating the seat...

512
00:29:37,129 --> 00:29:40,865
Get that arse out of my face!
McGuinness on pedals.

513
00:29:40,889 --> 00:29:44,316
...we were just about in business.

514
00:29:44,340 --> 00:29:45,625
Shut that door!

515
00:29:45,649 --> 00:29:47,259
It's a natural racing position...

516
00:29:48,419 --> 00:29:49,460
...ish.

517
00:29:51,340 --> 00:29:54,745
Three...
Where's the gear stick? ..two...

518
00:29:54,769 --> 00:29:57,755
Jesus! Are you all right? ..one...

519
00:29:57,779 --> 00:29:58,795
Oh, right on me...!

520
00:29:58,819 --> 00:30:01,436
...go! Ready?

521
00:30:01,460 --> 00:30:04,835
Have you got the handbrake on? No.
Right, get it into second.

522
00:30:04,859 --> 00:30:07,009
Get it into second.
Second? I'm trying!

523
00:30:09,499 --> 00:30:11,905
Right, you're going to have to
start braking. Start braking.

524
00:30:11,929 --> 00:30:13,545
Nice and easy. Brake, brake, brake.

525
00:30:13,569 --> 00:30:16,115
What are you doing? I'm braking.
Not stop!

526
00:30:16,139 --> 00:30:18,465
They've stopped!

527
00:30:18,489 --> 00:30:20,289
They've stopped!

528
00:30:21,619 --> 00:30:23,955
Right, just keep it like that
cos we've got a hairpin.

529
00:30:23,979 --> 00:30:27,176
Are you all right?
I'm getting cramp. Easy, Pad, easy.

530
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:30,139
They're either stationary
or they're going flat out.

531
00:30:32,259 --> 00:30:36,186
Slow down, slow down.
Brake, bit of brake, bit of brake.

532
00:30:36,210 --> 00:30:37,819
A bit of accelerator.

533
00:30:42,179 --> 00:30:45,279
Oh, my God. My left knacker...

534
00:30:46,849 --> 00:30:48,805
Here they come.

535
00:30:48,829 --> 00:30:51,316
I don't know what gear I'm in.
I can't get it back.

536
00:30:51,340 --> 00:30:53,505
It's my dad's car!

537
00:30:53,529 --> 00:30:55,515
That'll do. That'll do.
Are we there?

538
00:30:55,539 --> 00:30:57,545
Get me out of this car!

539
00:30:57,569 --> 00:30:59,795
You could have bought me
a drink first, Paddy.

540
00:30:59,819 --> 00:31:01,745
Do you want a bit more time
together, you two?

541
00:31:01,769 --> 00:31:03,875
Get two cigarettes down here!

542
00:31:06,090 --> 00:31:09,825
Oh, God. A cigarette
and a good cry. Oh, God!

543
00:31:09,849 --> 00:31:11,719
What's the time? You did it...

544
00:31:12,729 --> 00:31:15,899
...in 2:24.51. Get in, Pad.

545
00:31:17,539 --> 00:31:19,755
It felt a lot longer.

546
00:31:19,779 --> 00:31:25,729
Still, now with a time to beat, next
it was Harris' turn to go on top.

547
00:31:27,009 --> 00:31:28,515
Absolutely ridiculous.

548
00:31:28,539 --> 00:31:31,755
If you'd said to me
as I was watching the 2005 Ashes

549
00:31:31,779 --> 00:31:34,635
that I 'd be giving you
a lap dance in my dad's old car...

550
00:31:34,659 --> 00:31:36,595
No touching! Gentlemen, are you set?

551
00:31:36,619 --> 00:31:38,859
Sort of. All right.

552
00:31:41,179 --> 00:31:44,316
Three... You in gear. In gear.
..two...

553
00:31:44,340 --> 00:31:47,179
First. OK, let's go... one, go!

554
00:31:48,729 --> 00:31:49,989
Off they go.

555
00:31:51,779 --> 00:31:53,785
Can't see a thing, Chris.
I've got it, I've got it.

556
00:31:53,809 --> 00:31:55,985
Can't see where I'm going.
I'll tell you when to brake.

557
00:31:56,009 --> 00:31:58,395
Brake, brake, brake, brake.

558
00:31:58,419 --> 00:31:59,729
Looking smooth, lads.

559
00:32:01,259 --> 00:32:04,035
Roll it in now, roll it in.
I feel like a ventriloquist.

560
00:32:04,059 --> 00:32:07,090
It's all right for Chris,
cos he is the size of a child.

561
00:32:08,259 --> 00:32:10,395
How we doing, Chris?
You've got to tell me. I can't see.

562
00:32:10,419 --> 00:32:11,989
Brake, brake, fricking brake!

563
00:32:13,269 --> 00:32:17,316
I can't see. No use shouting at me.
I can see but I've got no tail.

564
00:32:17,340 --> 00:32:20,915
A bit of gas, a bit of gas.
I don't want to crash this.

565
00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:22,076
Oh, sh...!

566
00:32:22,100 --> 00:32:25,549
That was overseer! Overseer!
Wahey! Well done, Harris.

567
00:32:27,979 --> 00:32:30,035
And over the line.

568
00:32:30,059 --> 00:32:32,485
Stop here, stop there. Are we done?

569
00:32:32,509 --> 00:32:34,785
My leg. Oh, my God.

570
00:32:34,809 --> 00:32:38,059
Come on, then, McGuinness, give us
the good news. Your time is...

571
00:32:39,259 --> 00:32:43,196
...1:37.16.

572
00:32:43,220 --> 00:32:46,115
Do you feel violated, Christopher?
I don't know.

573
00:32:46,139 --> 00:32:49,149
I mean, I'm a massive cricket fan,
so it's partly an honor.

574
00:32:50,979 --> 00:32:55,186
The Beamer had been a minute quicker
than the Cortina.

575
00:32:55,210 --> 00:32:58,649
Now, could the humble Fiesta
do any better?

576
00:33:00,779 --> 00:33:02,345
Daddy...

577
00:33:02,369 --> 00:33:03,915
...can we go to the pub?

578
00:33:03,939 --> 00:33:06,465
No! No!

579
00:33:06,489 --> 00:33:08,835
Oh, McGuinness! Look at that.

580
00:33:08,859 --> 00:33:10,275
Are you ready, boys?

581
00:33:10,299 --> 00:33:13,705
What are you doing?
Come in, Fiesta. Come in, Fiesta.

582
00:33:13,729 --> 00:33:14,995
When you put your hand there,

583
00:33:15,019 --> 00:33:16,705
what are you thinking's
going to be there?

584
00:33:16,729 --> 00:33:19,316
There's something digging into
my you - know-what. Yes, my...!

585
00:33:19,340 --> 00:33:21,425
Boys, when you've finished arguing,
are you ready?

586
00:33:21,449 --> 00:33:23,435
We are ready.

587
00:33:23,459 --> 00:33:25,675
In three... Oh! ..two...

588
00:33:25,699 --> 00:33:28,340
No! ..one... Go! Give it some.

589
00:33:29,739 --> 00:33:32,865
It's not a bad start, that, to be
fair. Get it into second, Daddy.

590
00:33:32,889 --> 00:33:34,419
Nice tight line.

591
00:33:35,699 --> 00:33:39,115
Brake now, brake now, brake now.
Right hand, right hander.

592
00:33:39,139 --> 00:33:42,019
Give me some. Give me summat.
Not too much, not too much!

593
00:33:43,169 --> 00:33:46,115
They're going quite quick,
aren't they? Brake hard, brake hard.

594
00:33:46,139 --> 00:33:48,045
Nice tight line.

595
00:33:48,069 --> 00:33:49,605
Right-hander coming up, Daddy.

596
00:33:49,629 --> 00:33:53,425
Stop shouting where we're going.
Brake! Ow!

597
00:33:53,449 --> 00:33:56,125
They're nearly off the track.
I'm giving it everything.

598
00:33:56,149 --> 00:33:59,235
Go on, this is a good time, Daddy.
Here they come. What's the time?

599
00:33:59,259 --> 00:34:01,835
1:22. They're going to
have to be quick.

600
00:34:01,859 --> 00:34:04,076
Brake!

601
00:34:04,100 --> 00:34:05,939
Right, give me a big hand.

602
00:34:08,779 --> 00:34:10,225
Yes, we're over!

603
00:34:10,249 --> 00:34:11,675
We're over.

604
00:34:11,699 --> 00:34:13,429
Never again. Daddy...

605
00:34:14,489 --> 00:34:16,145
...I need a wee.

606
00:34:16,169 --> 00:34:17,915
How was that, Pad?

607
00:34:17,939 --> 00:34:19,865
A lot more comfortable steering.

608
00:34:19,889 --> 00:34:21,915
Yeah, it was a better run than ours.

609
00:34:21,939 --> 00:34:24,425
Do you want to know the time?
That felt like the winning time.

610
00:34:24,449 --> 00:34:26,355
1:37 to beat.

611
00:34:26,379 --> 00:34:30,275
You two did it in one minute...

612
00:34:30,299 --> 00:34:32,955
...30... Yes!

613
00:34:32,979 --> 00:34:34,505
Are you ready? Go on.

614
00:34:34,529 --> 00:34:36,705
...two. Yes!

615
00:34:36,729 --> 00:34:39,275
Well done, Daddy. Yes!

616
00:34:39,299 --> 00:34:40,755
Stop calling me Daddy.

617
00:34:40,779 --> 00:34:42,529
Come on, bath night, Daddy.

618
00:34:43,779 --> 00:34:45,555
So, lesson learned -

619
00:34:45,579 --> 00:34:48,035
if you're a dad and you
want your kids to have a head start

620
00:34:48,059 --> 00:34:51,755
behind the wheel,
get yourself a Fiesta.

621
00:34:51,779 --> 00:34:53,149
Oh, I enjoyed that, Daddy.

622
00:34:54,350 --> 00:34:56,485
Give me your hand. No! Get off.

623
00:34:56,509 --> 00:34:58,145
Can I be Mummy?

624
00:34:58,169 --> 00:35:00,845
You're Mummy. Give me your hand.
Go away.

625
00:35:00,869 --> 00:35:02,875
Get off! Carry me, Daddy.

626
00:35:02,899 --> 00:35:05,029
We can swing him.
I want to be carried!

627
00:35:14,220 --> 00:35:17,505
Now, I've jumped a car off a dam,
I've rolled a hearse -

628
00:35:17,529 --> 00:35:21,480
both are less stressful than getting
a lap dance off Chris Harris.

629
00:35:21,504 --> 00:35:24,898
It was like having a frisky badger
crawling all over me. It really was.

630
00:35:24,922 --> 00:35:27,179
You were all right
with frisky badger.

631
00:35:27,203 --> 00:35:28,978
I had Bigfoot crawling all over me.

632
00:35:29,002 --> 00:35:31,818
That... That in my face.

633
00:35:31,842 --> 00:35:33,568
Lucky lad! LAUGHTER

634
00:35:33,592 --> 00:35:35,888
If you ever call me Daddy again,
I'm off. I'm done.

635
00:35:35,912 --> 00:35:37,698
I thought you liked that.
No, I didn't.

636
00:35:37,722 --> 00:35:40,418
Can we not just hold hands
while we do this? Get off!

637
00:35:40,442 --> 00:35:41,668
But seriously, though,

638
00:35:41,692 --> 00:35:44,978
seeing those cars for the first time
in 40-odd years, it was emotional.

639
00:35:45,002 --> 00:35:47,458
I mean, you had a lump in
your throat. It was a tricky moment,

640
00:35:47,482 --> 00:35:50,028
boys. It was a tricky moment.
It brought back so many memories.

641
00:35:50,052 --> 00:35:52,428
Absolutely it did.
Good ones as well.

642
00:35:52,452 --> 00:35:54,098
Right, moving on, it's time

643
00:35:54,122 --> 00:35:56,738
to talk about peak-flow
traffic light systems.

644
00:35:56,762 --> 00:36:00,698
Is it heck! Here's Chris Harris
in a new supercar.

645
00:36:04,842 --> 00:36:08,128
This is the Lamborghini Sian.

646
00:36:11,232 --> 00:36:13,618
That means thunderbolt,

647
00:36:13,642 --> 00:36:17,098
and that means this is a hybrid.

648
00:36:17,122 --> 00:36:21,828
Yes, Lamborghini has finally
entered the electric era.

649
00:36:21,852 --> 00:36:25,028
And, as you'd expect,
it's not done it subtly.

650
00:36:27,279 --> 00:36:29,262
This spaceship of a supercar

651
00:36:29,286 --> 00:36:33,646
melds petrol and electricity
to generate over 800 horsepower.

652
00:36:35,706 --> 00:36:40,316
It is nothing short of the most
powerful Lamborghini ever made.

653
00:36:42,926 --> 00:36:45,933
So why am I not as excited
as I should be?

654
00:36:45,957 --> 00:36:49,582
Don't get me wrong -
it looks brilliantly ridiculous,

655
00:36:49,606 --> 00:36:51,552
but there was a time
when a new supercar -

656
00:36:51,576 --> 00:36:55,292
especially a new Lamborghini -
was a big event.

657
00:36:55,316 --> 00:36:58,462
Now it seems there's a new supercar
from Ferrari or Lamborghini

658
00:36:58,486 --> 00:37:00,286
or McLaren every other week.

659
00:37:05,486 --> 00:37:06,686
So...

660
00:37:08,776 --> 00:37:13,193
...let's see if the Sian
can stand out from the crowd.

661
00:37:20,046 --> 00:37:21,087
Wow!

662
00:37:22,566 --> 00:37:23,936
It's lively!

663
00:37:25,596 --> 00:37:28,006
It's oversteering and moving around.

664
00:37:30,236 --> 00:37:32,806
It is sodding fast.

665
00:37:34,087 --> 00:37:36,686
It's asking lots of questions
of my driving!

666
00:37:38,526 --> 00:37:43,122
This is not only the most powerful
Lamborghini ever made,

667
00:37:43,146 --> 00:37:47,596
it's the fastest too -
over 217 mph!

668
00:37:52,207 --> 00:37:56,342
Yeah, OK, this is
a very, very fast car.

669
00:37:56,366 --> 00:37:59,272
And when it comes to
the whole hybrid thing,

670
00:37:59,296 --> 00:38:02,446
the Sian is also
a very different car.

671
00:38:03,736 --> 00:38:06,342
The engine is no
downsized fuel sipper,

672
00:38:06,366 --> 00:38:11,316
but Lamborghini's very large,
very thirsty, 6.5 litre V12.

673
00:38:12,526 --> 00:38:15,632
And, unlike other hybrids
that you can plug into the mains,

674
00:38:15,656 --> 00:38:19,126
the Sian only gets electricity
from its own brakes.

675
00:38:20,716 --> 00:38:23,142
It doesn't even have a battery.

676
00:38:23,166 --> 00:38:25,967
Instead, it uses something else.

677
00:38:28,016 --> 00:38:29,822
Tucked away behind my head

678
00:38:29,846 --> 00:38:33,933
but in front of the engine is
something called a supercapacitor.

679
00:38:33,957 --> 00:38:37,183
It sounds very cool
and it is very cool.

680
00:38:37,207 --> 00:38:40,782
Now, a normal battery stores
electricity in chemical format,

681
00:38:40,806 --> 00:38:44,572
so it has to convert electricity
into a chemical and that takes time.

682
00:38:44,596 --> 00:38:46,662
That's why your battery
takes time to charge.

683
00:38:46,686 --> 00:38:49,492
But a supercapacitor stores
electricity as electricity

684
00:38:49,516 --> 00:38:51,702
which means it charges much faster,

685
00:38:51,726 --> 00:38:54,742
but most importantly it can
chuck it out much faster too -

686
00:38:54,766 --> 00:38:57,166
which means instant power.

687
00:38:58,816 --> 00:39:03,296
So when you brake hard into
a corner, you see it recharging...

688
00:39:05,456 --> 00:39:07,632
...then when you accelerate
out the other side...

689
00:39:07,656 --> 00:39:09,576
..you see it boosting.

690
00:39:12,166 --> 00:39:14,272
Clever stuff.

691
00:39:14,296 --> 00:39:18,542
So why isn't every hybrid -
in fact, every electric car -

692
00:39:18,566 --> 00:39:21,606
using supercapacitors
instead of batteries?

693
00:39:25,936 --> 00:39:27,967
Firstly, they're expensive...

694
00:39:29,566 --> 00:39:32,352
...which explains
why the Sian costs...

695
00:39:32,376 --> 00:39:35,782
Well, Lamborghini won't tell us
exactly how much it costs,

696
00:39:35,806 --> 00:39:39,073
but we're talking about a million.

697
00:39:39,097 --> 00:39:42,217
Plus another million and a bit.

698
00:39:44,926 --> 00:39:49,342
Secondly, supercapacitors
don't hold as much juice.

699
00:39:49,366 --> 00:39:54,012
About a quarter of the power
of an equivalent size battery.

700
00:39:54,036 --> 00:39:59,352
In fact, the motor in your Sian
only adds about 30 horsepower.

701
00:39:59,376 --> 00:40:03,022
Power that is only used
for a bit of extra low-speed shove

702
00:40:03,046 --> 00:40:05,012
and to smooth out the gear changes

703
00:40:05,036 --> 00:40:08,006
in what is a rather
antiquated gearbox.

704
00:40:10,326 --> 00:40:13,372
Really, once you're up
and going fast,

705
00:40:13,396 --> 00:40:16,073
this doesn't even
feel like a hybrid.

706
00:40:16,097 --> 00:40:19,992
I'm barely aware of anything
battery-related going on.

707
00:40:20,016 --> 00:40:26,222
All I can sense is that wonderful
V12 screaming away behind me.

708
00:40:30,696 --> 00:40:33,902
Truth is,
under the deranged bodywork,

709
00:40:33,926 --> 00:40:37,217
this revolutionary hybrid
is a bit of a gimmick.

710
00:40:38,246 --> 00:40:41,872
Really, it's an Aventador -

711
00:40:41,896 --> 00:40:44,742
a car we first saw a decade ago,

712
00:40:44,766 --> 00:40:49,166
now with a very small amount
of added electricity.

713
00:40:50,576 --> 00:40:54,912
And, in this age of cutting -edge,
dripping -with-tech,

714
00:40:54,936 --> 00:40:58,943
do-it-all-for-you supercars,
it has to be said,

715
00:40:58,967 --> 00:41:03,606
that really does make the Sian
stand out from the crowd.

716
00:41:05,646 --> 00:41:10,022
This couldn't be more different
to a super-clever Ferrari SF90.

717
00:41:10,046 --> 00:41:11,592
This isn't Lamborghini saying,

718
00:41:11,616 --> 00:41:14,943
'" Hey, we've made the supercar
for the next millennium, '"

719
00:41:14,967 --> 00:41:17,562
this is Lamborghini saying,
'"Ah, you know what?

720
00:41:17,586 --> 00:41:20,382
'"We slapped a bit of electricity
in there to smooth things over,

721
00:41:20,406 --> 00:41:22,286
' "but ultimately you're on your own.'"

722
00:41:23,526 --> 00:41:26,712
The Sian makes no sense.

723
00:41:26,736 --> 00:41:30,502
The back wants to step out
and the front wants to move around

724
00:41:30,526 --> 00:41:33,206
and I'm fighting it the whole time!

725
00:41:34,456 --> 00:41:37,512
It is utterly preposterous.

726
00:41:37,536 --> 00:41:40,823
I think that when
the next generation looks back

727
00:41:40,847 --> 00:41:42,943
from their electric cars
and what we were up to,

728
00:41:42,967 --> 00:41:47,452
they'll look at these
V12 Lamborghinis and say,

729
00:41:47,476 --> 00:41:48,967
' "That was insane! '"

730
00:41:50,196 --> 00:41:54,056
And that is exactly
the way it should be.

731
00:41:56,406 --> 00:41:57,446
Whoo!

732
00:41:59,016 --> 00:42:02,462
A Lamborghini should largely
make you... yourself!

733
00:42:02,486 --> 00:42:04,376
That's what this one's doing.

734
00:42:07,326 --> 00:42:09,352
Oh, it... It...

735
00:42:09,376 --> 00:42:13,342
It just reminds you that,
for all the cynicism,

736
00:42:13,366 --> 00:42:15,837
it's a wonderfully
ridiculous object.

737
00:42:18,256 --> 00:42:21,097
This is quite a machine!

738
00:42:32,536 --> 00:42:33,566
Wow.

739
00:42:36,977 --> 00:42:40,352
Look at it, Paddy.
That is a bit of you, that.

740
00:42:40,376 --> 00:42:43,392
It's got to be a big piggy bank,
though, to buy something like this.

741
00:42:43,416 --> 00:42:45,992
Chris, you're saying
it's too expensive... Yep.

742
00:42:46,016 --> 00:42:47,542
...it's basically an old car... Yep.

743
00:42:47,566 --> 00:42:50,102
...and the hybrid stuff doesn't
really do anything. Not really.

744
00:42:50,126 --> 00:42:51,222
But you love it?

745
00:42:51,246 --> 00:42:54,012
You drive it for ten minutes
and it tears your underwear off.

746
00:42:54,036 --> 00:42:57,582
It's so easy to be cynical
about these things. It's a supercar!

747
00:42:57,606 --> 00:43:00,272
But it's a hybrid, does that mean
it's better for the environment?

748
00:43:00,296 --> 00:43:02,542
Of course it's not. LAUGHTER

749
00:43:02,566 --> 00:43:05,272
I mean, listen, it's a stunning car,
it's a work of art,

750
00:43:05,296 --> 00:43:08,953
but when I see that name,
I know it's pronounced "see-Ann",

751
00:43:08,977 --> 00:43:10,992
but all's I see is Sian.

752
00:43:12,566 --> 00:43:16,102
Sian in Welsh,
in English, translated - Jane.

753
00:43:16,126 --> 00:43:18,012
So it's the Lamborghini Jane?

754
00:43:18,036 --> 00:43:20,362
LAUGHTER Yes.

755
00:43:20,386 --> 00:43:22,063
I'm just waiting
for the Ferrari Trevor.

756
00:43:23,376 --> 00:43:27,352
Anyhow, it's time to head back down
memory lane with our dads' cars,

757
00:43:27,376 --> 00:43:30,656
where we're getting a bit more dad
with every passing mile.

758
00:43:44,616 --> 00:43:46,222
Oh, my word!

759
00:43:46,246 --> 00:43:48,712
You know what, Fred, honestly?

760
00:43:48,736 --> 00:43:50,992
There were one chart
when we were kids,

761
00:43:51,016 --> 00:43:52,872
and you knew who number one was.

762
00:43:52,896 --> 00:43:54,432
Now, not a clue!

763
00:43:55,736 --> 00:43:58,592
Tell you what, it makes
my ears bleed, that rubbish.

764
00:44:00,456 --> 00:44:05,953
Funky Fanfare by Keith Mansfield

765
00:44:05,977 --> 00:44:09,616
It was the start of another day
with our dads' cars.

766
00:44:11,097 --> 00:44:13,312
And clearly already
in the right mind -set

767
00:44:13,336 --> 00:44:16,512
for more nostalgic pottering about
the Lake District...

768
00:44:16,536 --> 00:44:20,182
Never buy petrol on the services -
too expensive!

769
00:44:20,206 --> 00:44:26,126
...talk soon turned to that special
kind of wisdom that only dads have.

770
00:44:27,486 --> 00:44:30,392
I never once saw him
pull out an A to Z.

771
00:44:30,416 --> 00:44:32,712
He just knew everywhere.
It's just...

772
00:44:32,736 --> 00:44:34,902
I don't know,
it's just dad knowledge.

773
00:44:34,926 --> 00:44:36,472
Yeah, my dad had the map

774
00:44:36,496 --> 00:44:38,462
and he'd plan his route
meticulously -

775
00:44:38,486 --> 00:44:42,362
he knew exactly what road to go on,
but if we went on a long trip,

776
00:44:42,386 --> 00:44:44,792
it was like five o'clock
in the morning, we were all up,

777
00:44:44,816 --> 00:44:46,422
trying to beat the traffic.

778
00:44:46,446 --> 00:44:50,462
And actually pulling up and asking
for directions is a no-no.

779
00:44:50,486 --> 00:44:52,592
Not even an option.
Never saw it happen.

780
00:44:52,616 --> 00:44:53,823
He would rather...

781
00:44:53,847 --> 00:44:56,312
He would rather have
just spent the night in the car.

782
00:44:57,626 --> 00:45:00,262
The other one I had which is
really weird was dad facts -

783
00:45:00,286 --> 00:45:03,083
that you assumed they were real
because your dad told them to you.

784
00:45:03,107 --> 00:45:06,232
I can remember, he wouldn't
keep his hand on the gear lever

785
00:45:06,256 --> 00:45:08,392
cos he reckoned
it wore out the gearbox.

786
00:45:08,416 --> 00:45:11,073
Ha! I always remember my dad saying
to me when we were a kid,

787
00:45:11,097 --> 00:45:13,802
we lived at... You've been down my
street, so it's a narrow street,

788
00:45:13,826 --> 00:45:15,242
and they were doing...

789
00:45:15,266 --> 00:45:17,622
It used to be cobbled and they were
putting the tarmac down,

790
00:45:17,646 --> 00:45:19,742
and when they were digging
the cobbles out, I said,

791
00:45:19,766 --> 00:45:22,512
"What are they doing, Dad?" He said,
"Oh, they're getting it ready.

792
00:45:22,536 --> 00:45:24,902
"They're going to put a swimming
pool in front of the house."

793
00:45:24,926 --> 00:45:26,032
And I believed it!

794
00:45:26,056 --> 00:45:29,512
The disappointment when they come
pouring the tarmac down.

795
00:45:32,456 --> 00:45:34,953
Now, overnight,
the producers had been busy

796
00:45:34,977 --> 00:45:37,176
concocting another nostalgic test.

797
00:45:38,366 --> 00:45:40,977
This time, of us, the drivers.

798
00:45:42,056 --> 00:45:44,073
And to find out what
they had in store,

799
00:45:44,097 --> 00:45:46,432
we were told to park up
our dads' cars...

800
00:45:46,456 --> 00:45:49,982
Ah, glorious.

801
00:45:50,006 --> 00:45:54,442
...and head deep
into Grizedale Forest.

802
00:45:54,466 --> 00:46:00,242
Which, tantalisingly, is an area
renowned for its rallying heritage.

803
00:46:06,136 --> 00:46:07,872
Oh, gentleman!

804
00:46:07,896 --> 00:46:10,462
Oh! Look at that!

805
00:46:10,486 --> 00:46:13,056
Mark I I Escorts - on gravel?!

806
00:46:14,696 --> 00:46:16,752
Ohh! We're in!

807
00:46:16,776 --> 00:46:19,022
Oh, there's a challenge on this one.
Shall I get it?

808
00:46:19,046 --> 00:46:20,953
Very good.

809
00:46:20,977 --> 00:46:24,073
'"Time for some good,
old -fashioned dad motorsport.

810
00:46:24,097 --> 00:46:27,792
'"A bit of rallying in the woods.
In these classic Ford Escorts,

811
00:46:27,816 --> 00:46:31,152
'"you will see how close
you can get to a benchmark time

812
00:46:31,176 --> 00:46:32,592
' "set by Stig's dad.'"

813
00:46:32,616 --> 00:46:34,752
What are you laughing at?
I got through that.

814
00:46:34,776 --> 00:46:36,882
That was good, that was good.

815
00:46:36,906 --> 00:46:39,442
I was worried about the first line,
but then I just ploughed on.

816
00:46:39,466 --> 00:46:41,382
I ploughed on. I'm sorry!

817
00:46:45,296 --> 00:46:46,833
Oh, I think he's here.

818
00:46:46,857 --> 00:46:48,146
Is this Stig's dad?

819
00:46:49,566 --> 00:46:50,977
Yes, it was.

820
00:46:54,336 --> 00:46:58,622
And he'd be laying down the gauntlet
in that British motorsport icon,

821
00:46:58,646 --> 00:47:00,936
the MG Metro 6R4.

822
00:47:02,906 --> 00:47:06,272
Born out of World Rallying's
deranged Group B era

823
00:47:06,296 --> 00:47:10,320
back in the '80s, with 380
horsepower and four-wheel-drive...

824
00:47:12,926 --> 00:47:15,242
...it was fair to say
that Stig's dad...

825
00:47:15,266 --> 00:47:16,982
Dear Lord!

826
00:47:17,006 --> 00:47:18,496
...was in his element.

827
00:47:20,336 --> 00:47:21,912
Look at the top.
He's got a tank top on.

828
00:47:21,936 --> 00:47:23,953
He's got a pair
of flares on as well.

829
00:47:23,977 --> 00:47:26,102
Very nice.

830
00:47:26,126 --> 00:47:28,472
Right! Your last rallying
experience, how did that end?

831
00:47:28,496 --> 00:47:29,682
I rolled it.

832
00:47:29,706 --> 00:47:31,112
Oh. Yeah, I hit a tree.

833
00:47:35,286 --> 00:47:39,312
Just as well then that our retro
motorsport-inspired challenge

834
00:47:39,336 --> 00:47:42,422
would now play out
as a full-bore time trial

835
00:47:42,446 --> 00:47:46,616
across four miles of torturous,
tree-lined gravel tracks.

836
00:47:49,446 --> 00:47:52,272
As much a test of bravery
as it was skill,

837
00:47:52,296 --> 00:47:55,512
Stig's dad would set off first
in the 6R4,

838
00:47:55,536 --> 00:47:58,703
with our plucky Escorts
each lining up behind

839
00:47:58,727 --> 00:48:02,056
to see who could finish
closest to the rally legend.

840
00:48:19,456 --> 00:48:21,823
Harris is up to the line.

841
00:48:21,847 --> 00:48:24,542
Mark I I Escort with 300 horsepower.

842
00:48:24,566 --> 00:48:26,242
Here we go, then.

843
00:48:32,026 --> 00:48:34,112
What?!

844
00:48:34,136 --> 00:48:37,032
Where does it go?
I'm not quite sure!

845
00:48:45,226 --> 00:48:49,576
Wow! This is proper adrenaline
going now!

846
00:48:55,446 --> 00:48:59,416
Oh, this is sketchy!

847
00:49:00,646 --> 00:49:02,266
Man!

848
00:49:04,420 --> 00:49:05,726
Come on, Fred.

849
00:49:06,775 --> 00:49:08,952
Three, two, one.

850
00:49:14,915 --> 00:49:17,591
Not the smoothest of starts,

851
00:49:17,615 --> 00:49:19,415
but we're off.

852
00:49:22,485 --> 00:49:23,795
On the brake!

853
00:49:25,415 --> 00:49:27,871
Steer it, Fred. Steer, steer!

854
00:49:27,895 --> 00:49:29,661
Whoa!

855
00:49:29,685 --> 00:49:31,925
So we were all up and running.

856
00:49:33,155 --> 00:49:37,795
But, way out front,
the Stig's dad was flying.

857
00:49:45,155 --> 00:49:49,031
And while we had no idea
how fast each other was going...

858
00:49:49,055 --> 00:49:51,251
Overseer everywhere!

859
00:49:51,275 --> 00:49:53,471
...all we could do was try
and stay on the road...

860
00:49:53,495 --> 00:49:55,131
Got to get round!

861
00:49:55,155 --> 00:49:57,411
Oh, that's lost time!

862
00:49:57,435 --> 00:49:59,861
...and keep pushing
as hard as we dared.

863
00:49:59,885 --> 00:50:02,591
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa! Go, go, go!

864
00:50:02,615 --> 00:50:04,365
Come on, switch on, McGuinness!

865
00:50:06,215 --> 00:50:10,551
As we passed the halfway mark,
we were just hanging on.

866
00:50:10,575 --> 00:50:12,015
Brake, brake, brake!

867
00:50:13,205 --> 00:50:14,741
Oh, rescued it!

868
00:50:14,765 --> 00:50:16,411
But fair play to Harris...

869
00:50:16,435 --> 00:50:18,661
Trying drive on a line of sides!

870
00:50:18,685 --> 00:50:21,515
...he found another level.

871
00:50:23,515 --> 00:50:25,615
Whoa-ho-ho! Fully sideways!

872
00:50:27,846 --> 00:50:31,551
No idea where I'm going,
I'm just guessing!

873
00:50:31,575 --> 00:50:33,331
Oh, bit of a wobble!

874
00:50:33,355 --> 00:50:35,846
The back end's all over the shop!

875
00:50:37,565 --> 00:50:39,085
Nearly headed off then!

876
00:50:40,765 --> 00:50:43,981
As Stig's dad crossed
the finish line,

877
00:50:44,005 --> 00:50:46,445
the end was in sight.

878
00:50:48,165 --> 00:50:49,435
Wow!

879
00:50:50,685 --> 00:50:52,631
Man!

880
00:50:52,655 --> 00:50:55,726
If my dad could see me now! Go on!

881
00:50:58,575 --> 00:51:00,671
Whoa!

882
00:51:00,695 --> 00:51:02,391
I'm round!

883
00:51:02,415 --> 00:51:04,726
Oh, I'm round in one piece.

884
00:51:06,695 --> 00:51:08,261
That is proper driving, boys.

885
00:51:08,285 --> 00:51:09,421
Loved it!

886
00:51:09,445 --> 00:51:13,131
That's the first time I've been
round a rally stage and finished it.

887
00:51:13,155 --> 00:51:14,621
Thank you. HE LAUGHS

888
00:51:14,645 --> 00:51:17,541
I don't know if I'm fast
or 30 seconds behind you. Thank you.

889
00:51:17,565 --> 00:51:19,861
I think we'll be pretty close.
I haven't got a clue.

890
00:51:19,885 --> 00:51:22,101
The results! Oh, oh, oh, oh.

891
00:51:22,125 --> 00:51:23,822
Paddy, that's me. Yep.

892
00:51:23,846 --> 00:51:27,351
63 seconds slower than Stig's dad.

893
00:51:27,375 --> 00:51:29,141
So that's a minute.

894
00:51:29,165 --> 00:51:30,861
Ooh. Public school for you, that.

895
00:51:30,885 --> 00:51:32,101
And three seconds!

896
00:51:32,125 --> 00:51:33,771
Fred. Yep.

897
00:51:33,795 --> 00:51:37,851
37 seconds slower than Stig's dad.

898
00:51:37,875 --> 00:51:40,582
So he's nearly half a minute
quicker than you?

899
00:51:40,606 --> 00:51:43,261
S... Yeah. I'm going to have to
have a steward's inquiry into that.

900
00:51:43,285 --> 00:51:44,741
Can you say that out loud to me now?

901
00:51:44,765 --> 00:51:46,822
Nearly half a minute?
That can't be right.

902
00:51:46,846 --> 00:51:48,861
Anyway... I know
you're smiling on the outside,

903
00:51:48,885 --> 00:51:50,331
but are you embarrassed on the in?

904
00:51:50,355 --> 00:51:52,211
No, just hurting. FRED LAUGHS

905
00:51:52,235 --> 00:51:54,491
Wait, because he's got the card,
he can keep reading...

906
00:51:54,515 --> 00:51:55,861
No, no, no. But I don't mind...

907
00:51:55,885 --> 00:51:58,191
If the tables were turned,
if the tables were turned...

908
00:51:58,215 --> 00:52:00,911
I don't mind... If the tables
were turned, you would hammer him.

909
00:52:00,935 --> 00:52:03,141
I wouldn't cos I'm...
I'm not about that.

910
00:52:03,165 --> 00:52:05,832
Now... Now we're into
the meat and gravy.

911
00:52:05,856 --> 00:52:08,911
Chris, you were only...

912
00:52:08,935 --> 00:52:13,031
...12 seconds slower than Stig's dad!
Oh, Chris Harris. Well done, son.

913
00:52:13,055 --> 00:52:14,741
That is quick, pal. Well done, pal.

914
00:52:14,765 --> 00:52:16,621
That is quick! Well tried.

915
00:52:16,645 --> 00:52:18,981
Right, there's more.

916
00:52:19,005 --> 00:52:21,671
"These times will be
your handicap..."

917
00:52:21,695 --> 00:52:22,911
Oh, God.

918
00:52:22,935 --> 00:52:24,671
And I'm in a Fiesta.

919
00:52:24,695 --> 00:52:26,181
You're already handicapped!

920
00:52:26,205 --> 00:52:28,901
"..For the best bit
of any true dad's road trip -

921
00:52:28,925 --> 00:52:30,411
"the dash to the ferry."

922
00:52:30,435 --> 00:52:31,751
Oh!

923
00:52:31,775 --> 00:52:34,681
"We've booked one space
on the Windermere Ferry,

924
00:52:34,705 --> 00:52:37,421
"which departs in 20 minutes.

925
00:52:37,445 --> 00:52:41,221
"First dad's car to get there
gets the space."

926
00:52:41,245 --> 00:52:43,125
Right, we better get going.

927
00:52:44,805 --> 00:52:48,621
Yes, in our last
and most important test,

928
00:52:48,645 --> 00:52:50,931
we'd now have to get
back to the motors

929
00:52:50,955 --> 00:52:54,101
and make a last-minute dash
for the ferry.

930
00:52:54,125 --> 00:52:57,681
And with no phones, maps or sat navs
to help us,

931
00:52:57,705 --> 00:53:02,055
that's right,
it was time to go full dad!

932
00:53:06,525 --> 00:53:07,645
Oh, he's gone.

933
00:53:09,165 --> 00:53:11,805
I'm going right, boys,
I'm going right.

934
00:53:16,495 --> 00:53:18,315
When can I go? When can I go?

935
00:53:19,565 --> 00:53:23,061
This reminds me of racing
to the hovercraft with my father.

936
00:53:23,085 --> 00:53:25,645
Here we go,
we're off in the Cortina.

937
00:53:27,125 --> 00:53:28,661
He set off quick as well.

938
00:53:28,685 --> 00:53:30,551
I don't know
whether to go left or right,

939
00:53:30,575 --> 00:53:31,965
so I'm going to go straight.

940
00:53:33,795 --> 00:53:35,885
Come on, be the right choice!

941
00:53:41,215 --> 00:53:43,261
' "Windermere via ferry'"?

942
00:53:43,285 --> 00:53:44,901
Those are words I want to see!

943
00:53:46,055 --> 00:53:49,391
Here we go.
Oh, can't find it? Grind it.

944
00:53:49,415 --> 00:53:51,572
No need for fancy wheels spins
in this.

945
00:53:51,596 --> 00:53:54,781
Not with a top speed of 60. Ha!

946
00:53:54,805 --> 00:53:57,935
Right, this way. Here we go.

947
00:54:00,935 --> 00:54:03,421
The little Fiesta was on its way,

948
00:54:03,445 --> 00:54:06,351
but already
a long way behind the others.

949
00:54:06,375 --> 00:54:07,781
What's that?

950
00:54:07,805 --> 00:54:09,501
Windermere? Is it that way?

951
00:54:09,525 --> 00:54:13,781
To catch up, I 'd need
my dad - nav on full power.

952
00:54:13,805 --> 00:54:16,631
Eh-up. Eh-up!

953
00:54:16,655 --> 00:54:18,031
That's a sign!

954
00:54:18,055 --> 00:54:21,045
Hush by Deep Purple

955
00:54:23,215 --> 00:54:25,071
Where's Windermere?

956
00:54:25,095 --> 00:54:27,165
Where is it? I can't see a lake.

957
00:54:28,325 --> 00:54:31,931
I'm not sure this is the right way.
There's no lakes round here.

958
00:54:31,955 --> 00:54:34,877
Do you know, you're so used to
looking at your modern dashboard,

959
00:54:34,901 --> 00:54:36,835
where you've got your map on there,

960
00:54:36,859 --> 00:54:41,144
in these old -school motors, you've
got to be like a homing pigeon.

961
00:54:41,168 --> 00:54:43,764
And if you're not like
a homing pigeon...

962
00:54:43,788 --> 00:54:46,754
Oh, I've got no idea
if I'm going the right way or what.

963
00:54:46,778 --> 00:54:50,994
...you might well be forced
to do something deeply shameful.

964
00:54:51,018 --> 00:54:53,024
HORN HONKS Excuse me.

965
00:54:53,048 --> 00:54:55,124
Do you know which way
Windermere is, the lake?

966
00:54:55,148 --> 00:54:57,374
I "m trying to get the ferry.

967
00:55:00,158 --> 00:55:02,234
Right?

968
00:55:02,258 --> 00:55:05,224
This is pretty. Oh, 30.

969
00:55:05,248 --> 00:55:07,194
Windermere... Seven miles?!

970
00:55:07,218 --> 00:55:08,398
Better get a wriggle on.

971
00:55:10,688 --> 00:55:12,764
Oh, eh-up!

972
00:55:12,788 --> 00:55:16,184
"Windermere via ferry"!

973
00:55:16,208 --> 00:55:18,274
The race is on!

974
00:55:21,048 --> 00:55:22,938
Brilliant. Thank you so much.

975
00:55:24,318 --> 00:55:27,354
Hawkshead,
follow the signs to Hawkshead.

976
00:55:27,378 --> 00:55:29,864
So Flintoff was on his way again

977
00:55:29,888 --> 00:55:32,764
and now heading
straight for the ferry.

978
00:55:32,788 --> 00:55:34,575
Road signs, road signs,
come on, come on.

979
00:55:34,599 --> 00:55:36,554
Hawkshead, get in!

980
00:55:36,578 --> 00:55:38,474
Get in!

981
00:55:38,498 --> 00:55:40,864
But, by asking for directions,

982
00:55:40,888 --> 00:55:44,074
he had, of course,
broken the dad code.

983
00:55:44,098 --> 00:55:48,098
And the driving gods had soon
lined up a suitable punishment.

984
00:55:50,088 --> 00:55:52,154
Oh, no. Come on.

985
00:55:52,178 --> 00:55:54,595
I don't need to be behind
the camper van in the Lake District.

986
00:55:54,619 --> 00:55:55,778
Blooming heck!

987
00:55:59,458 --> 00:56:02,124
Ooh, what lake's this?
This looks quite big.

988
00:56:02,148 --> 00:56:03,678
Here we go, boys!

989
00:56:05,118 --> 00:56:07,544
As a family, we didn't really
win much, the Harrises,

990
00:56:07,568 --> 00:56:12,418
we were a bit useless,
so this might be a maiden victory.

991
00:56:13,938 --> 00:56:15,504
What's that there?

992
00:56:15,528 --> 00:56:17,304
' "Welcome to Windermere Ferry.'"

993
00:56:17,328 --> 00:56:18,938
Where is it? Down there?

994
00:56:22,298 --> 00:56:23,578
Is this right?

995
00:56:24,648 --> 00:56:27,938
Come on!
Oh, get this camper out the way!

996
00:56:29,408 --> 00:56:32,734
It's got to be that way,
there's water down there.

997
00:56:32,758 --> 00:56:35,138
Ferries like water.

998
00:56:38,098 --> 00:56:41,378
I can't believe there's a ferry
down here. It's a bit narrow.

999
00:56:43,938 --> 00:56:45,994
No, all wrong.
No signs for the ferry.

1000
00:56:46,018 --> 00:56:48,028
No nothing. Idiot.

1001
00:56:49,578 --> 00:56:51,378
Idiot, idiot, idiot.

1002
00:56:55,859 --> 00:56:58,744
Can I get past? Oh, I can.

1003
00:56:58,768 --> 00:57:01,024
We're going past,
the Cortina's overtaking.

1004
00:57:01,048 --> 00:57:03,224
It's only overtaking.

1005
00:57:03,248 --> 00:57:05,304
There's a lake!
Is that Lake Windermere?

1006
00:57:05,328 --> 00:57:06,489
Come on!

1007
00:57:07,578 --> 00:57:09,674
Oh, oh, oh!

1008
00:57:09,698 --> 00:57:12,595
Bloody hell, it's my dad's car!

1009
00:57:12,619 --> 00:57:15,914
Oh, here we are. What's that?

1010
00:57:15,938 --> 00:57:18,504
Via the ferry? That way.

1011
00:57:18,528 --> 00:57:20,178
Boats, that's a good sign.

1012
00:57:21,458 --> 00:57:25,234
Where am I now?
' "Windermere via ferry.'"

1013
00:57:25,258 --> 00:57:26,739
On track, lads.

1014
00:57:28,499 --> 00:57:31,258
Harris is definitely
going to have got there before me.

1015
00:57:33,098 --> 00:57:34,178
Definitely.

1016
00:57:37,378 --> 00:57:39,448
He's got there before me,
I know he has!

1017
00:57:40,888 --> 00:57:42,619
"Welcome to the ferry." I'm here!

1018
00:57:45,248 --> 00:57:48,258
Can I see him? Is he on? Is he on?

1019
00:57:53,609 --> 00:57:55,354
I can't be the first here.

1020
00:57:55,378 --> 00:57:56,588
I can't be!

1021
00:58:01,328 --> 00:58:04,024
They've shut the gate!
He's got to be on, it's a wind - up.

1022
00:58:04,048 --> 00:58:06,595
It's a wind - up,
he's got to be on here.

1023
00:58:06,619 --> 00:58:08,744
He must be!

1024
00:58:08,768 --> 00:58:10,248
Have you seen a little fella?

1025
00:58:11,258 --> 00:58:12,924
No?

1026
00:58:12,948 --> 00:58:14,514
HORN HONKS Oh, it's Flintoff!

1027
00:58:14,538 --> 00:58:16,174
You are winding me up.

1028
00:58:16,198 --> 00:58:17,818
I think the Fiesta's done it!

1029
00:58:19,098 --> 00:58:20,914
I think the little Fiesta's done it!

1030
00:58:20,938 --> 00:58:25,234
Oh! Dad, I hope you're seeing this!

1031
00:58:25,258 --> 00:58:27,184
How? How?

1032
00:58:27,208 --> 00:58:28,524
I don't know!

1033
00:58:28,548 --> 00:58:30,354
Did you ask for directions?

1034
00:58:30,378 --> 00:58:32,384
No, because I were driving

1035
00:58:32,408 --> 00:58:34,465
and there were a massive sign
saying Windermere.

1036
00:58:34,489 --> 00:58:36,304
That's just you all over!

1037
00:58:36,328 --> 00:58:38,024
What? No matter how far you drop,

1038
00:58:38,048 --> 00:58:39,864
your arse lands
in butter every time.

1039
00:58:39,888 --> 00:58:42,104
Oh, dear me! HORN HONKS

1040
00:58:42,128 --> 00:58:44,634
Eh-up. Oh, no.

1041
00:58:44,658 --> 00:58:45,884
Here he is.

1042
00:58:45,908 --> 00:58:48,154
Here we go. Oh, mate.

1043
00:58:48,178 --> 00:58:49,364
How?

1044
00:58:49,388 --> 00:58:51,184
I got carried away
and went off on the road.

1045
00:58:51,208 --> 00:58:52,354
I was enjoying it.

1046
00:58:52,378 --> 00:58:54,944
When I saw the sign saying ferry,
I turned right. Yeah.

1047
00:58:54,968 --> 00:58:57,754
But I didn't turn left,
I just turned right and carried on.

1048
00:58:57,778 --> 00:58:59,564
I've been to another village.

1049
00:58:59,588 --> 00:59:01,104
Also... Oh! Also... BUZZING

1050
00:59:01,128 --> 00:59:04,074
Lads, I can't talk, boys.
Dad's ferry's off.

1051
00:59:04,098 --> 00:59:06,874
Take your elbows off there, mate.

1052
00:59:06,898 --> 00:59:08,595
Have a good'un!

1053
00:59:08,619 --> 00:59:11,715
Right, Captain Birdseye,
get us out of here.

1054
00:59:14,698 --> 00:59:16,384
That wants some oil on it.

1055
00:59:16,408 --> 00:59:18,514
See you, Pad!

1056
00:59:18,538 --> 00:59:20,644
Have a good'un!

1057
00:59:20,668 --> 00:59:23,715
Come on, Chris. Let's go get
some food. Let's get some food.

1058
00:59:25,128 --> 00:59:27,794
I'll do you a postcard, lads!

1059
00:59:27,818 --> 00:59:30,178
"From Dad, with love."

1060
00:59:33,538 --> 00:59:34,668
Lovely.

1061
00:59:36,418 --> 00:59:38,314
Right.

1062
00:59:38,338 --> 00:59:39,848
Bit chilly on these ferries.

1063
00:59:55,568 --> 00:59:56,864
Amazing.

1064
00:59:56,888 --> 00:59:59,504
You see? You want to skid
a supercar around Silverstone,

1065
00:59:59,528 --> 01:00:00,944
call Chris Harris.

1066
01:00:00,968 --> 01:00:03,074
But if you want to get
to a small ferry

1067
01:00:03,098 --> 01:00:04,914
in the north of England on time,

1068
01:00:04,938 --> 01:00:07,524
you'll be needing me
and an old Fiesta.

1069
01:00:07,548 --> 01:00:10,184
It doesn't get more dad than that.
Lovely stuff!

1070
01:00:10,208 --> 01:00:12,114
Pad, the producers
stuck you on a ferry

1071
01:00:12,138 --> 01:00:13,664
to somewhere you didn't want to go.

1072
01:00:13,688 --> 01:00:15,644
You didn't so much win
as get deported.

1073
01:00:15,668 --> 01:00:18,644
Yeah, I did realise that
when I got to the other side

1074
01:00:18,668 --> 01:00:20,154
and no-one were there.

1075
01:00:20,178 --> 01:00:22,964
So I got back on, come across
and there was no-one there either.

1076
01:00:22,988 --> 01:00:24,595
Me and Chris did
have a lovely dinner.

1077
01:00:24,619 --> 01:00:25,884
Did you? We did.

1078
01:00:25,908 --> 01:00:28,954
Genuinely, I think this
is my favourite thing we've done.

1079
01:00:28,978 --> 01:00:31,994
Yeah. Just pottering round
the Lake District in old cars.

1080
01:00:32,018 --> 01:00:35,034
It just shows you, you don't have
to go abroad to have some fun.

1081
01:00:35,058 --> 01:00:36,314
Absolutely.

1082
01:00:36,338 --> 01:00:38,465
And I know we've been
talking about dads all show,

1083
01:00:38,489 --> 01:00:40,475
but we haven't forgot
about you, mums.

1084
01:00:40,499 --> 01:00:42,234
Happy Mother's Day, mums!

1085
01:00:42,258 --> 01:00:44,768
Happy Mother's Day! Mwah!

1086
01:00:48,048 --> 01:00:49,725
Love the mums!

1087
01:00:49,749 --> 01:00:53,314
We're back next week
with the best Bond cars ever. Yes!

1088
01:00:53,338 --> 01:00:57,554
And this lunatic races
another lunatic in a jetpack.

1089
01:00:57,578 --> 01:00:59,074
There goes the no-claims.

1090
01:00:59,098 --> 01:01:02,178
See you then. Goodnight!

1091
01:01:02,202 --> 01:01:04,202
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