1
00:00:28,279 --> 00:00:29,410
AARON: Hello?

2
00:00:29,410 --> 00:00:31,912
Hey Aaron,
it's Sloane Spencer.

3
00:00:31,912 --> 00:00:33,574
I was calling to check
on the arrangements

4
00:00:33,574 --> 00:00:35,035
for the Snow Angel
premiere party.

5
00:00:35,326 --> 00:00:38,459
Sloane, darling.
It's going to
be exquisite.

6
00:00:38,459 --> 00:00:39,750
Valhalla.

7
00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:42,163
We're going to have
100 white doves

8
00:00:42,163 --> 00:00:44,545
preset in cages
over the entrance.

9
00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:46,837
So when Caitlin Quinn arrives,
we'll release them!

10
00:00:47,298 --> 00:00:49,300
Picture it. The Snow Angel

11
00:00:49,300 --> 00:00:53,384
with all those gorgeous
white birds swooping
around her. Spectacular!

12
00:00:53,384 --> 00:00:55,266
Wow.
I know, right?

13
00:00:55,476 --> 00:00:56,767
Now, just one question.

14
00:00:56,767 --> 00:00:57,848
Sure.

15
00:00:57,848 --> 00:00:59,730
What happens when
you stick those birds

16
00:00:59,730 --> 00:01:01,682
next to hot lights for
a couple of hours?

17
00:01:01,682 --> 00:01:02,773
Hmm?

18
00:01:02,773 --> 00:01:04,064
They die, brain trust!

19
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:06,107
It's like sticking them
in a rotisserie.

20
00:01:06,107 --> 00:01:07,858
Do you want a
hundred charred,
roasted birds

21
00:01:07,858 --> 00:01:09,490
plummeting down on
the star of our movie?

22
00:01:09,490 --> 00:01:11,282
No. I didn't think...

23
00:01:11,282 --> 00:01:12,493
Damn right,
you didn't think!

24
00:01:12,493 --> 00:01:14,325
Now, you have exactly
one hour to call me back

25
00:01:14,325 --> 00:01:15,866
with ideas for a
premier event

26
00:01:15,866 --> 00:01:17,958
that doesn't belong in
a Stephen King novel.

27
00:01:21,372 --> 00:01:23,754
Javier, find me some
heat-resistant doves.

28
00:01:24,044 --> 00:01:25,466
JAVIER: Right away.

29
00:01:43,063 --> 00:01:45,646
Hey, you can't park here.
That's a handicapped spot.

30
00:01:47,067 --> 00:01:48,819
Oh, God. I'm so sorry.

31
00:02:03,204 --> 00:02:04,705
Sloane!

32
00:02:10,461 --> 00:02:12,633
We were starting to
think you were gonna
take the day off.

33
00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:16,056
Not at all. I figured
you'd like a latte to get
you through the morning.

34
00:02:16,847 --> 00:02:18,058
You read my mind.

35
00:02:18,519 --> 00:02:20,471
So, how's the Snow Angel's
party coming along?

36
00:02:20,471 --> 00:02:23,814
Awesome. It is gonna be
the biggest thing to ever
happen on Christmas Day.

37
00:02:23,814 --> 00:02:26,026
Except for the whole
Jesus being born
thing, right?

38
00:02:26,026 --> 00:02:27,688
(CHUCKLES)
It's gonna be
bigger than that.

39
00:02:27,978 --> 00:02:29,690
Exactly. Where are we
with the press?

40
00:02:29,690 --> 00:02:31,772
Well, I've got
phone calls out to
all the major networks.

41
00:02:31,772 --> 00:02:33,113
I'm just waiting
for confirmation...

42
00:02:33,113 --> 00:02:36,657
Wait, they haven't
confirmed yet?
This party is in three days!

43
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,158
I know when the party is.

44
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,700
And I'll make sure
the networks are there.

45
00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:42,373
You know, I'd be
happy to pitch in,
make some calls myself,

46
00:02:42,373 --> 00:02:44,124
if Sloane's feeling
overwhelmed...

47
00:02:44,124 --> 00:02:46,877
I'm not. Thank you.
I've got everything
under control.

48
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,339
Even Caitlin?

49
00:02:48,339 --> 00:02:49,420
Of course.

50
00:02:49,420 --> 00:02:51,131
Sloane?

51
00:02:51,131 --> 00:02:52,132
We've got
a problem.

52
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:53,674
Caitlin?

53
00:02:54,755 --> 00:02:55,846
CAITLIN: (ON VIDEO)
I know you!

54
00:02:55,846 --> 00:02:58,299
ANDREW: Oh, God!
She's drunk. Again.

55
00:02:58,759 --> 00:02:59,850
SANTA: Oh, ho, ho!

56
00:02:59,850 --> 00:03:01,802
Is she trying to
tank her career?

57
00:03:01,802 --> 00:03:03,684
I shouldn't have had
that fifth margarita.

58
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,356
(VOMITS)
Oh, dear!

59
00:03:05,356 --> 00:03:08,729
(CHILDREN EXCLAIMING)
WOMAN: All right,
we're going. Come with me.

60
00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,862
Caitlin Quinn does not
make enough money
to behave this badly.

61
00:03:11,862 --> 00:03:13,524
One of you two...
I'm on it.

62
00:03:13,524 --> 00:03:15,316
I'll make sure
they take it down.

63
00:03:15,316 --> 00:03:16,657
Great.

64
00:03:16,657 --> 00:03:18,699
Anything I can do
to help?

65
00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:21,081
Yeah. Can you get me
a Red Bull?

66
00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:22,823
(SCOFFS)
I'll take one, too.

67
00:03:23,324 --> 00:03:26,417
Thank God you're here,
so I don't have to deal
with this idiotic...

68
00:03:26,417 --> 00:03:29,670
Caitlin!
Can you believe they sold
that video to the tabloids?

69
00:03:31,131 --> 00:03:33,884
Stupid elves,
always looking to
make a buck.

70
00:03:34,174 --> 00:03:35,256
I need you to fix this!

71
00:03:36,757 --> 00:03:39,139
I know, I know.
It's an elf thing.

72
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,762
You're the victim here.
But don't you worry,

73
00:03:42,393 --> 00:03:45,516
'cause Sloane is gonna
take care of everything,
all right?

74
00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:48,108
All right.

75
00:03:48,108 --> 00:03:49,560
This is cold.

76
00:03:54,315 --> 00:03:57,278
Sweetie, listen.
You know we all love you,

77
00:03:57,278 --> 00:03:59,450
but you gotta stop
doing stuff like this.

78
00:03:59,450 --> 00:04:01,452
Like what?
Let me see.

79
00:04:01,452 --> 00:04:03,203
Attacking Heidi Montag
at the VMAs.

80
00:04:03,203 --> 00:04:04,244
She provoked me.

81
00:04:04,455 --> 00:04:07,458
Getting arrested for
smuggling drugs across
the Mexican border?

82
00:04:07,458 --> 00:04:08,579
They were diet pills.

83
00:04:08,579 --> 00:04:09,630
Two hundred of them?

84
00:04:09,870 --> 00:04:11,372
The camera adds
10 pounds.

85
00:04:12,423 --> 00:04:16,797
Okay, what about
shoplifting a $4,000
coat from Prada?

86
00:04:17,638 --> 00:04:20,681
(CHUCKLES)
Look, I told you,
I wasn't shoplifting.

87
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:24,014
I was just so drunk that
I forgot I'd tried it on.

88
00:04:25,686 --> 00:04:29,229
Oh, okay, I guess
I should have told
the public that.

89
00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:32,353
Look. Caitlin.

90
00:04:32,603 --> 00:04:35,155
You're starring in
a family movie now,

91
00:04:35,155 --> 00:04:38,319
and believe it or not,
there is such thing
as bad publicity.

92
00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:41,572
Snow Angel, it can make
or break your career.

93
00:04:41,572 --> 00:04:43,324
If you blow this,

94
00:04:43,324 --> 00:04:45,326
you might not get
another chance.

95
00:04:46,206 --> 00:04:48,909
So you might want
to be just a little
bit more careful

96
00:04:48,909 --> 00:04:50,871
with the way you present
yourself to others.

97
00:04:52,212 --> 00:04:54,675
Like now,
for instance.

98
00:04:57,678 --> 00:04:59,340
Caitlin!
Hmm?

99
00:05:00,681 --> 00:05:02,262
Oh, I'll put it back.

100
00:05:05,386 --> 00:05:08,098
The story's contained
and Caitlin promised
to lay low

101
00:05:08,098 --> 00:05:09,480
until after the
movie's released.

102
00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:11,602
It's good work, Sloane.
It's really good work.

103
00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:13,103
Good enough to get me
the promotion to VP?

104
00:05:13,484 --> 00:05:15,486
I don't know,
that's a big step.

105
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:19,700
Well, you are the son of
the firm's president.

106
00:05:19,990 --> 00:05:22,322
Is there anything
that I can do to help

107
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,824
influence that
decision?

108
00:05:25,035 --> 00:05:26,367
Like this?

109
00:05:27,578 --> 00:05:30,621
Or maybe this, or...

110
00:05:32,663 --> 00:05:34,004
...this?

111
00:05:34,004 --> 00:05:36,046
Mmm. Mmm-hmm.

112
00:05:37,007 --> 00:05:38,338
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

113
00:05:38,879 --> 00:05:40,551
Well, that works
for me.

114
00:05:41,051 --> 00:05:43,924
Just promise me you won't
try to influence my dad
the same way.

115
00:05:43,924 --> 00:05:45,596
(GIGGLING)

116
00:05:46,056 --> 00:05:48,138
Are you
coming over later?

117
00:05:48,138 --> 00:05:50,350
It'll be a lot later.
I've got a client
meeting tonight.

118
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,183
But I'll tell you what,
why don't I take you out
tomorrow night

119
00:05:53,183 --> 00:05:56,477
and we'll celebrate
your victory in handling
this whole Caitlin mess.

120
00:05:56,477 --> 00:06:00,651
And we'll go
someplace special.
Like, say, Panache?

121
00:06:00,981 --> 00:06:03,824
Really? (GASPS)
That would be amazing!

122
00:06:04,074 --> 00:06:05,696
I've been dying
to go there.

123
00:06:05,696 --> 00:06:09,410
I know. So, why don't you
call them and get us
some reservations. Okay?

124
00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:11,331
Will do.

125
00:06:11,952 --> 00:06:13,454
Okay, that's my girl.

126
00:06:14,665 --> 00:06:15,796
(SIGHS)

127
00:06:16,917 --> 00:06:18,589
I talked Caitlin
off the ledge.

128
00:06:18,589 --> 00:06:20,000
Oh, it's a
Christmas miracle!

129
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,672
Well, Andrew
thought so.

130
00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:23,424
You know,
I stopped caring
about who you date

131
00:06:23,424 --> 00:06:25,175
exactly two seconds
after I dumped you.

132
00:06:25,175 --> 00:06:27,307
(CHUCKLES)
First of all,
I dumped you.

133
00:06:27,307 --> 00:06:29,640
(LAUGHS)
Second, it's just pitifully
obvious how jealous you are

134
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:31,432
that I'm gonna get
get the VP slot
instead of you.

135
00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:33,724
I think it takes more than
sleeping with the boss
to get a promotion.

136
00:06:33,724 --> 00:06:36,977
Yeah, it's gonna take
turning the Snow Angel party
into the event of the decade.

137
00:06:36,977 --> 00:06:39,019
Once I do that,
I'm a shoo-in
for VP.

138
00:06:39,019 --> 00:06:41,652
I'll get
the best clients,
the corner office,

139
00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:43,193
bonus, use of
the company jet,

140
00:06:43,193 --> 00:06:46,366
basically everything
you ever wanted, and
that makes you crazy.

141
00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:50,991
It's not a contest,
you know.

142
00:06:51,992 --> 00:06:53,333
Oh, yes, it is.

143
00:06:54,034 --> 00:06:55,035
And I'm winning.

144
00:07:03,804 --> 00:07:06,136
VIVIAN:
Let's go in here. Ooh!

145
00:07:06,136 --> 00:07:08,849
I need to decide what
Larry's buying me
for Christmas!

146
00:07:09,049 --> 00:07:11,722
Ooh, that one
would look stunning

147
00:07:11,722 --> 00:07:14,975
with the red dress that
I'm wearing at brunch
on Christmas morning.

148
00:07:14,975 --> 00:07:16,186
I wish you
were there
to see it.

149
00:07:16,607 --> 00:07:18,609
I told you, I have to
work all day Christmas.

150
00:07:18,609 --> 00:07:20,731
Of course. I just...

151
00:07:21,401 --> 00:07:23,654
We used to have so much fun
on Christmas mornings.

152
00:07:23,654 --> 00:07:27,658
Getting all dressed up,
posing for pictures
by the Christmas tree.

153
00:07:27,658 --> 00:07:29,660
Remember?
Of course I do.

154
00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:33,574
Oh, I know. Have Larry
take a picture of you
and email it to me.

155
00:07:34,665 --> 00:07:35,876
Will do.

156
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:38,338
I'll see that
one, please.
Certainly, madam.

157
00:07:38,338 --> 00:07:39,670
Here, hold your brother.

158
00:07:39,670 --> 00:07:41,752
(SCOFFS) Mom, please
don't call him that.

159
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:46,046
Now, how come Larry
isn't getting you
your present himself?

160
00:07:46,046 --> 00:07:48,298
He's in Cleveland
on business
till the 24th.

161
00:07:48,298 --> 00:07:49,850
He doesn't have
time to shop.

162
00:07:50,721 --> 00:07:52,683
Pretty.
Pretty expensive!

163
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:55,095
The more it costs,
the more Larry knows
he loves me.

164
00:07:55,395 --> 00:07:57,057
That's not very romantic.

165
00:07:57,057 --> 00:08:01,862
Darling, men come and go,
but diamonds are forever.

166
00:08:02,312 --> 00:08:04,605
(CHUCKLING)
You want one? Yeah?

167
00:08:04,605 --> 00:08:05,906
I think your brother
wants one.

168
00:08:05,906 --> 00:08:07,237
Please don't call him that.

169
00:08:07,818 --> 00:08:10,490
SLOANE: Hey, Jenny!
I know you're gonna
be shocked.

170
00:08:10,821 --> 00:08:13,493
I'm late. Again.
I'll see you in five.

171
00:08:14,074 --> 00:08:16,707
Oh, my God,
this is fantastic!

172
00:08:16,957 --> 00:08:19,920
It is a chestnut tartlet
with a tangelo glaze.

173
00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:21,501
Hey, it's insane.

174
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,293
Your customers must
eat this up.

175
00:08:23,293 --> 00:08:25,175
Well, they would,
if we had any.

176
00:08:25,385 --> 00:08:27,127
It's probably slow
'cause of the holiday.

177
00:08:27,127 --> 00:08:29,179
And I would eat this
every day.

178
00:08:29,179 --> 00:08:32,392
Good. I'm thinking about
making it for Christmas
dinner on Saturday.

179
00:08:32,392 --> 00:08:33,684
Oh, about dinner...

180
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,185
You can't come.

181
00:08:35,185 --> 00:08:36,637
I'm sorry,
I have to work.

182
00:08:36,897 --> 00:08:38,518
On Christmas Day?

183
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:41,732
Oh, Sloane Spencer
makes a rare appearance.

184
00:08:41,732 --> 00:08:43,143
It's a Christmas miracle!

185
00:08:43,644 --> 00:08:45,105
Merry Christmas, Ed.

186
00:08:46,066 --> 00:08:47,527
What's up
with Scrooge?

187
00:08:47,818 --> 00:08:49,990
He's worried
about money.
We both are.

188
00:08:49,990 --> 00:08:51,992
I don't know why
I ever thought it would
be a good idea

189
00:08:51,992 --> 00:08:53,654
to open
a restaurant in LA.

190
00:08:53,654 --> 00:08:56,496
Uh, because you're
an amazing chef.
Always have been.

191
00:08:56,496 --> 00:08:58,709
You know,
you're the reason
for my freshman 15.

192
00:08:58,709 --> 00:09:00,330
Oh, come on!

193
00:09:00,330 --> 00:09:03,083
Who knew that truffle oil
was so good on top of
mac and cheese.

194
00:09:03,083 --> 00:09:04,665
My specialty.

195
00:09:04,665 --> 00:09:07,087
And once people realize
how irresistible
your food is,

196
00:09:07,087 --> 00:09:08,969
you're gonna have a line
outside the door.

197
00:09:08,969 --> 00:09:11,802
Actually, I wanted to
talk to you about that.
(CELL PHONE BEEPING)

198
00:09:12,132 --> 00:09:14,975
I know that people
would love this place,
if they'd ever heard of it.

199
00:09:14,975 --> 00:09:16,637
But I just don't know
how to get the word out.

200
00:09:17,517 --> 00:09:21,271
So, I was hoping that
maybe you could help me,

201
00:09:21,271 --> 00:09:24,685
since you are
the best publicist
in the entire city.

202
00:09:25,185 --> 00:09:27,277
Flattery will get you
everywhere.

203
00:09:27,277 --> 00:09:28,398
(BOTH LAUGHING)

204
00:09:28,398 --> 00:09:31,782
Okay, what this place
needs is star power.

205
00:09:31,992 --> 00:09:33,864
Okay.
We'll get the
celebrities in here,

206
00:09:33,864 --> 00:09:37,157
we'll get the paparazzi
out there, and you'll get
a full house, guaranteed.

207
00:09:37,828 --> 00:09:41,161
Do you still have those
gift certificates left over
from the grand opening?

208
00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:43,333
They're in
the storeroom.

209
00:09:43,664 --> 00:09:46,166
Oh! Could you give them
to some of your
famous clients?

210
00:09:46,166 --> 00:09:47,758
(GASPS) No.

211
00:09:48,709 --> 00:09:50,671
I'll give them to all
my famous clients.

212
00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:53,884
(EXCLAIMING)
I'll put them inside
our company gift bags,

213
00:09:53,884 --> 00:09:56,386
and I promise you,
by New Year's,

214
00:09:56,386 --> 00:09:58,478
this will be the hottest
place in Hollywood.

215
00:09:58,719 --> 00:10:01,311
Oh, my gosh!
Thank you so much!

216
00:10:01,311 --> 00:10:02,522
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
You have no idea...

217
00:10:02,522 --> 00:10:03,894
Oh, hold on,
hold on.

218
00:10:04,144 --> 00:10:05,565
Hey, Aaron.

219
00:10:05,565 --> 00:10:07,147
I'll go get the
gift certificates.

220
00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:09,609
Yeah, you better be
calling me with
some good news,

221
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,152
or you will be singing
Christmas carols
as a soprano!

222
00:10:14,154 --> 00:10:15,996
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

223
00:10:18,538 --> 00:10:20,040
Hi, Caitlin. What's up?

224
00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:22,332
Hey, hey. Okay.

225
00:10:22,332 --> 00:10:24,374
Do you know if you
need a passport to
go out in the ocean,

226
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:26,166
since technically
you're leaving the States?

227
00:10:26,546 --> 00:10:29,009
Oh, God. Caitlin,
what have you gotten
yourself into now?

228
00:10:29,009 --> 00:10:31,842
Nothing, nothing.
I just met this awesome guy
who owns a yacht

229
00:10:31,842 --> 00:10:33,463
and he's taking me sailing!

230
00:10:33,463 --> 00:10:34,594
Caitlin, no.

231
00:10:34,805 --> 00:10:36,847
Do not get on the boat.
Promise me.

232
00:10:36,847 --> 00:10:39,259
Oh, my gosh,
it's not a boat, Sloane,
it's a yacht!

233
00:10:39,519 --> 00:10:40,761
Promise me!

234
00:10:40,761 --> 00:10:42,352
Fine. I promise.

235
00:10:42,352 --> 00:10:43,854
Okay, we just
talked about this.

236
00:10:43,854 --> 00:10:46,066
You promised
to not get into
any trouble until...

237
00:10:46,066 --> 00:10:47,978
I said fine,
party-pooper!

238
00:10:51,822 --> 00:10:53,323
MAN: Here you go!

239
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:55,575
(LAUGHING)

240
00:10:55,575 --> 00:10:56,907
(WHOOPS)

241
00:10:59,740 --> 00:11:01,952
(CHOKING)

242
00:11:08,588 --> 00:11:10,000
(RINGING)

243
00:11:17,257 --> 00:11:18,799
Hello? Caitlin?

244
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,011
(DISTORTED CHATTER)

245
00:11:21,011 --> 00:11:23,473
Sweetie, it's
a bad connection.
Call me back.

246
00:11:23,473 --> 00:11:24,725
(HANGS UP)

247
00:11:24,725 --> 00:11:27,517
(SIGHS) I swear,
if you're calling me from
the middle of the Pacific,

248
00:11:27,517 --> 00:11:30,150
I will swim out there
and drown you myself.

249
00:11:31,772 --> 00:11:32,983
(SIGHS)

250
00:11:33,573 --> 00:11:34,985
(RINGING)

251
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:41,241
Hello? Caitlin? Hello?
CAITLIN: (DISTORTED)
Hello? Hello?

252
00:11:41,912 --> 00:11:43,453
Hello?
(COMPUTER BUZZING)

253
00:11:43,453 --> 00:11:45,996
Sloane. Sloane. Sloane.

254
00:11:46,496 --> 00:11:48,208
Sloane.
Caitlin?

255
00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,170
(STATIC HISSING ON TV)
Hello? Sloane.

256
00:11:50,170 --> 00:11:52,502
(PHONE RINGING)
Sloane. Hello? Sloane.

257
00:11:53,253 --> 00:11:55,505
Hello?
Hello? Sloane.

258
00:11:55,675 --> 00:11:58,138
Sloane. Sloane.
Oh, my God, shut up. Shut up!

259
00:12:05,105 --> 00:12:06,516
Sloane.

260
00:12:06,516 --> 00:12:07,768
(BOTH SCREAMING)

261
00:12:07,768 --> 00:12:10,650
Caitlin! Jeez! Oh, my...

262
00:12:10,650 --> 00:12:13,153
You scared me to death!
How did you get in here?

263
00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:17,067
(IN DEEP TONE)
Sloane Spencer,
time is running out.

264
00:12:17,527 --> 00:12:20,120
You must
change your ways
or pay the price.

265
00:12:21,281 --> 00:12:23,824
(EXCLAIMS) Oh, my God.
How good was that?

266
00:12:24,164 --> 00:12:25,705
You know, I should
have totally won
Best Actress

267
00:12:25,705 --> 00:12:27,167
at the Teen Choice
Awards last year.

268
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:28,248
Stupid Dakota Fanning.

269
00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:32,502
Okay. you know what,
sit down. Sit down.

270
00:12:32,502 --> 00:12:35,375
What happened?
Did you break up with
a boyfriend or something?

271
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,717
Oh, God,
please don't tell me
there's a sex tape.

272
00:12:37,717 --> 00:12:40,470
This isn't about me, Sloane,
it's too late for me.

273
00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:43,093
But you still
have a chance.
A chance for what?

274
00:12:43,093 --> 00:12:44,594
Not to die alone.

275
00:12:45,976 --> 00:12:47,477
Okay, are you drunk?

276
00:12:47,477 --> 00:12:48,478
No!

277
00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:51,061
Okay, maybe a little.

278
00:12:51,061 --> 00:12:55,025
I mean, I only had,
like, one, two, four...

279
00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:56,486
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
That bottle.

280
00:12:56,486 --> 00:12:58,278
You know what,
that's not the point.

281
00:12:59,489 --> 00:13:00,821
(IN DEEP TONE)
For the next
three nights,

282
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:04,164
you will be visited
by three ghosts at
the stroke of midnight.

283
00:13:04,164 --> 00:13:06,827
Three ghosts?
You mean like
Dickens' three ghosts?

284
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:09,499
Exactly. They're gonna
give you your only shot
at redemption.

285
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,172
Okay, here's what
we're gonna do.

286
00:13:12,172 --> 00:13:13,874
You're gonna
go home now,

287
00:13:13,874 --> 00:13:15,836
and tomorrow morning,
we're going to go see about

288
00:13:15,836 --> 00:13:18,048
getting you some
professional help, okay?

289
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:19,880
It'll be completely
confidential.

290
00:13:21,091 --> 00:13:22,132
Promise.

291
00:13:22,512 --> 00:13:24,514
I'm not the one
who needs help,
Sloane.

292
00:13:25,685 --> 00:13:29,019
All right, that's it.
I put up with a lot with
my clients, but I've never...

293
00:13:32,732 --> 00:13:33,894
How did you do that?

294
00:13:33,894 --> 00:13:36,486
Listen to me, Sloane.
Listen to me!

295
00:13:38,108 --> 00:13:39,399
Go away!

296
00:13:41,651 --> 00:13:43,203
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

297
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:47,037
Get out of my house!

298
00:13:47,037 --> 00:13:48,328
Babe, are you okay?

299
00:13:48,498 --> 00:13:49,829
(SIGHS)

300
00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:51,251
Yes. Yes. I am.

301
00:13:51,661 --> 00:13:53,293
The craziest thing
just happened. Caitlin...

302
00:13:53,293 --> 00:13:55,005
Oh, God,
you haven't heard.

303
00:13:55,005 --> 00:13:57,087
Heard what?
Turn on your TV.

304
00:14:00,630 --> 00:14:03,263
Quinn was dancing
on this spot
earlier this evening

305
00:14:03,263 --> 00:14:05,095
when she apparently
choked to death

306
00:14:05,305 --> 00:14:07,677
on an olive while
drinking her martini.

307
00:14:08,058 --> 00:14:09,769
Too bad it wasn't
an apple martini,

308
00:14:09,769 --> 00:14:11,641
or she'd be alive today.

309
00:14:12,022 --> 00:14:13,353
Back to you.

310
00:14:18,738 --> 00:14:20,110
(GASPS)

311
00:14:27,407 --> 00:14:28,658
Thank you.

312
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:33,543
Hi, I was told
Caitlin Quinn
was brought here?

313
00:14:34,294 --> 00:14:35,415
Are you family?

314
00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:37,918
I'm her publicist.

315
00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:39,259
PATRICK: Sloane.

316
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:42,592
Oh, my God.
Sloane Spencer.

317
00:14:42,592 --> 00:14:45,175
Come here.
Patrick? Oh, my God!

318
00:14:45,675 --> 00:14:46,886
I can't believe it!

319
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,138
How many years
has it been?

320
00:14:48,428 --> 00:14:51,011
Too many.
I'm so happy to see you.

321
00:14:51,311 --> 00:14:53,273
What are you
doing here?
I work here.

322
00:14:53,513 --> 00:14:56,066
What are you doing here?
What, are you sick?

323
00:14:56,066 --> 00:14:59,149
No, I'm here to see
one of my clients.

324
00:14:59,149 --> 00:15:00,190
(WHISPERS)
Caitlin Quinn?

325
00:15:02,782 --> 00:15:04,985
Come on.
I'll take you to her.

326
00:15:05,865 --> 00:15:07,407
Wow. It's good
to see you.
You, too.

327
00:15:19,839 --> 00:15:21,881
I just had to see
for myself.

328
00:15:22,132 --> 00:15:24,504
I can't believe it.
She's dead.

329
00:15:25,545 --> 00:15:27,677
I told her
to stop getting
into so much trouble.

330
00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:28,928
Hey, you can't
blame yourself.

331
00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:31,181
(SIGHS)
No, you don't
understand.

332
00:15:31,811 --> 00:15:34,014
Her movie premiere
is in three days!

333
00:15:34,014 --> 00:15:36,726
I know. It's hard to lose
someone so young,
with so much ahead of them.

334
00:15:36,726 --> 00:15:38,148
This is a nightmare.

335
00:15:39,649 --> 00:15:42,192
I'll give you
some time alone
with her.

336
00:15:42,562 --> 00:15:43,943
Say your goodbyes.

337
00:16:00,630 --> 00:16:02,082
(SIGHS)

338
00:16:04,504 --> 00:16:06,506
Do you think that gurney
makes me look fat?

339
00:16:06,506 --> 00:16:09,139
(GASPS)
No. No, no, no, no.
This is impossible.

340
00:16:09,139 --> 00:16:10,640
You're dead!
That is your body.

341
00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:12,892
Yeah, draped in the
tackiest sheets ever.

342
00:16:12,892 --> 00:16:14,054
What is this, polyester?

343
00:16:14,434 --> 00:16:15,935
All right.
This isn't happening.

344
00:16:16,226 --> 00:16:17,267
Seriously.

345
00:16:17,517 --> 00:16:20,400
They need to swap this out
for Egyptian cotton before
anyone else views me.

346
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:22,562
No, no, no, no, no.
You aren't happening.

347
00:16:23,103 --> 00:16:24,484
How could you be
talking to me
if you're dead?

348
00:16:24,694 --> 00:16:26,276
I'll give you a hint.

349
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:31,911
Boo!
(GASPS)

350
00:16:32,452 --> 00:16:34,874
You're...
You're a ghost?

351
00:16:35,245 --> 00:16:37,617
Yup. Just like Marley from
A Christmas Carol.

352
00:16:39,669 --> 00:16:42,672
Okay, no. This isn't real.
You're dreaming.
You're dreaming.

353
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:44,624
Wake up, Sloane!
Wake up!

354
00:16:44,924 --> 00:16:46,256
(GASPS)

355
00:16:46,586 --> 00:16:47,587
(SIGHS)

356
00:16:47,797 --> 00:16:48,838
You awake now?

357
00:16:51,261 --> 00:16:52,592
PATRICK: Sloane?

358
00:16:55,095 --> 00:16:57,307
What's the matter?
You're covered in sweat.

359
00:16:58,688 --> 00:16:59,729
Are you okay?

360
00:17:01,351 --> 00:17:03,022
I see dead people.

361
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,029
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

362
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,952
I've heard you have
your first psychotic break
in your early 20's.

363
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,205
Do you think that's
what's happening to me?

364
00:17:15,205 --> 00:17:16,576
No. You're not crazy.

365
00:17:17,117 --> 00:17:18,248
(SIGHS)
I promise.

366
00:17:19,369 --> 00:17:21,751
I had a conversation
with a dead celebrity.

367
00:17:22,001 --> 00:17:25,425
It was a hallucination,
a reaction to your
friend dying.

368
00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:27,167
Oh, no,
we weren't friends.

369
00:17:27,167 --> 00:17:29,719
Okay, still.
Stress messes
with the head.

370
00:17:29,719 --> 00:17:31,841
It makes you
see things that
aren't there.

371
00:17:32,592 --> 00:17:34,053
So you don't
believe in ghosts?

372
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:36,055
Sure I do.
Really?

373
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,598
Absolutely.
When I was
in the tenth grade,

374
00:17:38,598 --> 00:17:40,480
we had this seance
at a slumber party,

375
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:43,062
and I promise you
the Ouija board moved
on its own.

376
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,945
It said that
Christina Aguilera was gonna
go to the prom with me.

377
00:17:47,607 --> 00:17:50,530
She didn't, but that's not
the Ouija board's fault.

378
00:17:52,652 --> 00:17:54,694
Sloane! Come on.
Wake up!

379
00:17:55,034 --> 00:17:58,748
You don't need an exorcist.
You need just a vacation.

380
00:17:58,748 --> 00:18:01,251
I know! I need to just
chuck everything and

381
00:18:01,501 --> 00:18:03,082
lie on a beach in
the middle of Hawaii.

382
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:04,584
(PHONE BEEPING)

383
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,629
I should be able to
get off of work
sometime in January

384
00:18:09,879 --> 00:18:11,511
of 2018. (LAUGHS)

385
00:18:13,173 --> 00:18:15,014
Yeah, you know what,
Sloane, you're right.

386
00:18:15,014 --> 00:18:17,677
Who needs Hawaii
when you can have

387
00:18:17,677 --> 00:18:20,480
LA traffic,
dead celebrities.

388
00:18:21,060 --> 00:18:22,812
Hmm. Impending
schizophrenia?

389
00:18:25,225 --> 00:18:26,606
I've missed you.

390
00:18:29,569 --> 00:18:31,151
Whose fault is that?

391
00:18:32,732 --> 00:18:34,574
You didn't have to leave.

392
00:18:34,574 --> 00:18:38,658
Yes, I did.
It was med school.
It was my dream.

393
00:18:40,039 --> 00:18:41,120
What else was
I supposed to do?

394
00:18:41,581 --> 00:18:43,873
I know. I just...
You could have
come with me.

395
00:18:45,705 --> 00:18:49,249
In fact, I thought
you were coming with me.

396
00:18:49,919 --> 00:18:52,552
I couldn't.
Could you imagine me,

397
00:18:52,752 --> 00:18:55,305
stuck out in the
middle of nowhere,
working as a cashier

398
00:18:55,965 --> 00:18:58,388
at a Pick 'n Save,
while you're
at your classes?

399
00:18:58,758 --> 00:19:00,350
What kind of life
would that have been?

400
00:19:03,723 --> 00:19:05,104
(PHONE BEEPING)

401
00:19:11,691 --> 00:19:13,233
You better get that.

402
00:19:15,945 --> 00:19:17,577
I guess I better.

403
00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,095
(ALARM RINGING)

404
00:20:04,744 --> 00:20:06,496
(SCREAMING)
(LAUGHING)

405
00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:08,828
I know, I know.
You're startled by
my good looks.

406
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,881
Okay. You are not
really here.

407
00:20:11,881 --> 00:20:14,254
No, no.
This is a figment
of my imagination,

408
00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:16,095
caused by too
much stress.

409
00:20:16,296 --> 00:20:18,258
Who are you trying
to convince here,
you or me?

410
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:20,009
Leave me alone!

411
00:20:21,341 --> 00:20:22,512
(GASPS)

412
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:26,396
Damn. Does he
do Pilates? Yum.

413
00:20:27,437 --> 00:20:29,108
Go away!

414
00:20:31,901 --> 00:20:35,024
Wow! That's a nice way
to start the day.

415
00:20:35,024 --> 00:20:38,618
No. I mean, yes,
maybe later.
Go back to sleep.

416
00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:41,741
(MUFFLED)
Mmm. I can't breathe.
Honey?

417
00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:46,125
(SCREAMING)

418
00:20:46,125 --> 00:20:47,417
(LAUGHING)

419
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,208
That never gets old.
What do you want?

420
00:20:49,208 --> 00:20:51,631
I told you.
I was sent to
give you a warning.

421
00:20:51,831 --> 00:20:54,213
"Change your ways,
(DISTORTED TONE)
or suffer the consequences."

422
00:20:54,213 --> 00:20:56,135
Sent by who? God?

423
00:20:56,135 --> 00:20:58,428
The universe?
Freaking Tom Cruise?

424
00:20:58,428 --> 00:21:00,009
Yeah, I wasn't really
paying attention.

425
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,591
(SIGHS) Why not?

426
00:21:01,591 --> 00:21:02,932
I thought I saw
Michael Jackson.

427
00:21:04,183 --> 00:21:05,765
Morning, babe.

428
00:21:06,936 --> 00:21:08,888
A little early
for vodka,
don't you think?

429
00:21:08,888 --> 00:21:11,351
It's not mine.
It's hers.
It's Caitlin's.

430
00:21:12,191 --> 00:21:13,693
Yeah. He can't see me,
you know.

431
00:21:14,734 --> 00:21:16,446
Look.

432
00:21:16,446 --> 00:21:18,568
Uh... (CLEARS THROAT)
It's in...

433
00:21:18,568 --> 00:21:20,570
It's in honor
of Caitlin.

434
00:21:21,451 --> 00:21:23,242
Doesn't seem like
she's really gone.

435
00:21:23,823 --> 00:21:25,785
Oh, honey. I can't
believe it either.

436
00:21:26,115 --> 00:21:29,078
She was so young
and full of life and...

437
00:21:29,078 --> 00:21:30,960
(BEEPING)
Hey, coffee's ready!

438
00:21:32,121 --> 00:21:34,504
The good news is,
I have decided
to put you in charge

439
00:21:34,504 --> 00:21:35,795
of Caitlin's
memorial service.

440
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:36,796
(EXCLAIMS) Yes!

441
00:21:37,086 --> 00:21:40,009
Uh, so how is
that good news?

442
00:21:40,009 --> 00:21:43,262
Pulling off a good funeral
is like the litmus test
for a PR agent.

443
00:21:43,262 --> 00:21:45,595
Yup.
This could get you
a lock on that promotion.

444
00:21:45,845 --> 00:21:48,428
Sure can.
And since you're already
working on the premiere party,

445
00:21:48,428 --> 00:21:50,189
it'll be cake.
Cake.

446
00:21:50,930 --> 00:21:53,232
Besides, I only deal
with living clients.

447
00:21:53,232 --> 00:21:54,774
Dead ones don't
generate revenue.

448
00:21:54,774 --> 00:21:56,646
(SCOFFS)
What a jerk!

449
00:21:57,897 --> 00:21:59,569
Ooh! That was
kind of fun.

450
00:21:59,569 --> 00:22:00,900
Don't!

451
00:22:01,401 --> 00:22:02,572
Don't what?

452
00:22:03,743 --> 00:22:05,495
Um... (CLEARS THROAT)

453
00:22:05,495 --> 00:22:09,118
Put your coffee cup
on the counter, please.

454
00:22:10,209 --> 00:22:12,412
Wow. Okay.

455
00:22:13,873 --> 00:22:15,415
I've got an early meeting,
so I'm gonna run,

456
00:22:15,415 --> 00:22:17,417
but I will see you
at the office.

457
00:22:24,424 --> 00:22:25,595
(GIGGLES)

458
00:22:26,426 --> 00:22:27,597
Okay, you've had your fun,

459
00:22:27,597 --> 00:22:30,930
you've given me your warning,
will you just please
go away, already?

460
00:22:30,930 --> 00:22:32,392
Sorry.

461
00:22:34,684 --> 00:22:37,607
Garlic?
I'm a ghost, Sloane,
not a vampire.

462
00:22:38,237 --> 00:22:40,400
You're a pain in the ass!
Now, get out!

463
00:22:40,980 --> 00:22:42,071
Mmm, I don't think so.

464
00:22:42,572 --> 00:22:45,074
Until you actually
heed my warning,
you're stuck with me.

465
00:22:45,074 --> 00:22:47,987
Okay, I'll heed your
warning right now.

466
00:22:47,987 --> 00:22:49,368
Just tell me what
I gotta do.

467
00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:51,080
Change your ways.
Change...

468
00:22:52,492 --> 00:22:54,704
Change them how?
To be better.

469
00:22:54,704 --> 00:22:57,587
Okay. What do you
need me to do?
Specifically.

470
00:22:57,757 --> 00:23:01,260
See, that's the other thing.
I was in the bathroom when
they explained that part.

471
00:23:01,591 --> 00:23:03,673
Tiny bladder.
This is so unfair.

472
00:23:03,673 --> 00:23:05,264
You die, and I'm in hell.

473
00:23:09,268 --> 00:23:10,770
Nice apartment.

474
00:23:11,100 --> 00:23:12,432
(ELEVATOR DINGS)

475
00:23:16,776 --> 00:23:18,357
Oh! Hold the
elevator, please.

476
00:23:22,612 --> 00:23:24,694
Oh, sir, your briefcase!

477
00:23:24,694 --> 00:23:25,695
MAN: What the...

478
00:23:27,076 --> 00:23:28,578
Wait, wait.
Hey!

479
00:23:36,586 --> 00:23:38,037
Morning.

480
00:23:38,918 --> 00:23:41,841
Are you sure
you don't want to just
wait in my office?

481
00:23:42,091 --> 00:23:44,253
By myself? Yawn.

482
00:23:44,714 --> 00:23:46,716
Fine. Not a word.

483
00:23:48,848 --> 00:23:50,600
CARL: Really nice work, guys.

484
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:53,222
That's exactly
the kind of event that
we were looking for.

485
00:23:59,939 --> 00:24:02,191
So sorry I'm late,
everyone, I was

486
00:24:03,062 --> 00:24:04,734
dealing with Caitlin
all morning.

487
00:24:04,734 --> 00:24:06,946
We were just
getting to her.
Have a seat.

488
00:24:09,408 --> 00:24:11,741
Hey! Respect for
the dead, missy!

489
00:24:12,411 --> 00:24:15,575
You do realize this party
needs to go on as planned,
Caitlin or no Caitlin.

490
00:24:15,575 --> 00:24:18,247
Yes, of course.
I'm on top of it.

491
00:24:18,578 --> 00:24:22,001
Oh, really? Because you
missed your meeting with
the caterers this morning.

492
00:24:22,842 --> 00:24:25,384
Oh, my God.
I completely forgot.

493
00:24:26,085 --> 00:24:28,177
Don't worry.
I will go call them
right now.

494
00:24:28,177 --> 00:24:30,590
Sit back down.
Jason already handled it.

495
00:24:33,092 --> 00:24:34,303
You're welcome.

496
00:24:35,434 --> 00:24:38,437
Now, even though
our client has expired

497
00:24:38,437 --> 00:24:40,600
before fulfilling her
three picture deal,

498
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:42,862
she can still
generate revenue.

499
00:24:43,402 --> 00:24:44,944
I remember '63...

500
00:24:44,944 --> 00:24:48,487
Oh, Carl!
Your old wrinkled hands

501
00:24:48,487 --> 00:24:51,951
would feel so good
on my young, firm...

502
00:24:51,951 --> 00:24:53,412
Back off!
(CLEARS THROAT)

503
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:02,672
(SIGHS) I'm so bored.

504
00:25:03,002 --> 00:25:05,004
I thought we were
going to be talking
about my memorial.

505
00:25:05,004 --> 00:25:07,086
It's not a memorial,
it's a party.

506
00:25:08,047 --> 00:25:12,221
Sloane, you have
something to add?

507
00:25:13,553 --> 00:25:18,978
Well, since they're
doing a memorial service
for Caitlin...

508
00:25:19,939 --> 00:25:20,980
(CLEARS THROAT)
For Caitlin.

509
00:25:21,601 --> 00:25:25,404
And since we're handling
the premiere party

510
00:25:26,315 --> 00:25:28,648
why don't we just
combine them

511
00:25:29,198 --> 00:25:30,860
to make them
one big event?

512
00:25:31,070 --> 00:25:32,361
Her tragedy...

513
00:25:32,361 --> 00:25:36,996
Her tragedy will become
a brilliant photo op.

514
00:25:38,828 --> 00:25:40,830
That is a great idea!

515
00:25:40,830 --> 00:25:43,002
You know, movie stars
love opportunities

516
00:25:43,002 --> 00:25:45,164
to make the public think
they actually care
about people,

517
00:25:45,164 --> 00:25:48,718
and if we spin this right,
we could get every A-lister
in town to show up.

518
00:25:50,590 --> 00:25:51,761
What do you think, Dad?

519
00:25:51,761 --> 00:25:53,092
(CARL LAUGHING)

520
00:25:53,092 --> 00:25:57,016
I love it!
We'll turn Caitlin's death
into a gold mine!

521
00:25:57,266 --> 00:25:59,518
That's exactly
what Caitlin
would have wanted.

522
00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:02,982
We'll make Saturday
an all-day
media extravaganza.

523
00:26:03,352 --> 00:26:06,395
It will be the biggest
PR event of the year.

524
00:26:06,395 --> 00:26:07,396
Oh, yeah.

525
00:26:08,487 --> 00:26:11,530
I'm gonna need everyone
to work overtime between
now and then, okay?

526
00:26:13,112 --> 00:26:16,405
But Saturday's
Christmas.

527
00:26:17,747 --> 00:26:19,118
You said we could
take the day off.

528
00:26:19,118 --> 00:26:21,410
That was before I decided
I needed you to work.

529
00:26:22,411 --> 00:26:25,915
But we won't get to
see our families.

530
00:26:27,627 --> 00:26:29,298
Our client is dead.

531
00:26:29,669 --> 00:26:30,760
Try and have
a little heart.

532
00:26:31,510 --> 00:26:32,802
(MOUTHING)

533
00:26:33,092 --> 00:26:34,924
All right.
Let's make this happen.

534
00:26:37,767 --> 00:26:39,268
Hey, Sloane.

535
00:26:39,268 --> 00:26:41,851
I know you've got a lot
on your plate right now,

536
00:26:41,851 --> 00:26:43,432
so after I met
with the caterers,

537
00:26:43,432 --> 00:26:45,144
I confirmed the party
with all the networks.

538
00:26:45,144 --> 00:26:48,147
Well, you're just
wasting your time because
I already did that.

539
00:26:48,147 --> 00:26:49,939
I was just
waiting for them
to call me back, so...

540
00:26:49,939 --> 00:26:52,401
Oh, it wasn't a waste of time.
See, Carl was getting worried,

541
00:26:52,401 --> 00:26:54,403
so I figured somebody
around here needed to

542
00:26:54,403 --> 00:26:56,365
stop waiting
and start doing.

543
00:26:56,365 --> 00:26:58,077
Have a productive day.

544
00:26:58,738 --> 00:27:00,499
(SIGHS)

545
00:27:02,541 --> 00:27:04,203
(SITAR MUSIC PLAYING)

546
00:27:04,203 --> 00:27:07,707
Did you see the way that
Jason sabotaged me with
that whole catering thing?

547
00:27:07,707 --> 00:27:09,508
He was helping you.
Yeah, right.

548
00:27:09,709 --> 00:27:12,301
There's only one
VP slot opening up
in the new year,

549
00:27:12,301 --> 00:27:13,673
and he's trying to
steal it from me.

550
00:27:13,673 --> 00:27:15,755
But he better watch out
because I am going to
throw the most

551
00:27:15,755 --> 00:27:17,516
talked about,
star-studded event ever!

552
00:27:17,887 --> 00:27:18,968
Awesome. How?

553
00:27:19,759 --> 00:27:21,600
I have no idea.
Good plan.

554
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:23,432
(SIGHS)
I have three days!

555
00:27:23,432 --> 00:27:24,934
Jason's right.
I'm screwed.

556
00:27:24,934 --> 00:27:27,396
Sloane,
do you want to
do some yoga?

557
00:27:27,396 --> 00:27:28,858
Yoga?

558
00:27:28,858 --> 00:27:30,479
No, I'm too stressed.

559
00:27:30,479 --> 00:27:31,981
It's just a party.

560
00:27:31,981 --> 00:27:36,275
It was. Now, we got to
turn it into a celebration
of your entire life!

561
00:27:36,275 --> 00:27:37,366
Good thing I died young.

562
00:27:38,738 --> 00:27:40,740
I have to make a
career retrospective,

563
00:27:40,740 --> 00:27:43,282
make blowups of the stills
of all the movies
that you've been in,

564
00:27:43,282 --> 00:27:45,995
find other stars
to make touching
anecdotes about you,

565
00:27:45,995 --> 00:27:47,246
if they even
have one.

566
00:27:47,246 --> 00:27:50,960
And figure out a way
to make "death by cocktail
garnish" seem dignified.

567
00:27:51,290 --> 00:27:52,752
It's three days
before Christmas.

568
00:27:52,752 --> 00:27:53,963
No one's in
their office.

569
00:27:53,963 --> 00:27:56,886
And even we don't
have direct numbers
to celebrities.

570
00:27:57,927 --> 00:27:59,258
But I do.

571
00:28:04,183 --> 00:28:05,394
What is this thing?

572
00:28:05,765 --> 00:28:07,106
Aluminum man.

573
00:28:07,106 --> 00:28:08,647
You paid money
for this?

574
00:28:08,647 --> 00:28:11,480
Sloane, I'm a movie star.
Disposable income?

575
00:28:15,404 --> 00:28:17,236
All right. Where did you say
I could find these keys?

576
00:28:17,576 --> 00:28:18,818
Under one of those
little rocks.

577
00:28:18,818 --> 00:28:20,699
Uh, yeah.
That's really helpful.

578
00:28:21,450 --> 00:28:24,203
You know, I feel kind of
guilty breaking into
your house like this.

579
00:28:24,203 --> 00:28:26,585
Shouldn't your parents
be coming over to take
care of your things?

580
00:28:26,585 --> 00:28:27,917
Oh, both my parents
are dead.

581
00:28:28,537 --> 00:28:30,459
Oh, I'm so sorry.

582
00:28:30,750 --> 00:28:32,922
Yeah, apparently
it's hereditary.

583
00:28:32,922 --> 00:28:35,424
So, what's going to
happen with your stuff?

584
00:28:36,255 --> 00:28:38,968
You know, maybe I should
give some of it to my charity.

585
00:28:38,968 --> 00:28:40,800
Right. Your charity.

586
00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:41,931
No, seriously.

587
00:28:42,391 --> 00:28:44,934
...as the new spokeswoman
for Project Pearly Whites,

588
00:28:44,934 --> 00:28:47,346
I am thrilled to announce
that we have already donated

589
00:28:47,346 --> 00:28:50,729
over 5,000 tooth-bleaching
kits to the children
of Uzbekistan.

590
00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:54,733
They may be refugees,
but now they have
something to smile about.

591
00:28:56,275 --> 00:28:59,909
That way, my legacy will
live on in their hearts
and gums forever.

592
00:29:00,319 --> 00:29:01,320
Got it!

593
00:29:10,209 --> 00:29:12,081
Wait. How did you...

594
00:29:12,291 --> 00:29:13,752
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

595
00:29:15,925 --> 00:29:18,587
Hello?
Sloane, hey.
It's Patrick.

596
00:29:18,798 --> 00:29:20,259
Patrick. Hi!

597
00:29:21,140 --> 00:29:23,142
Um... What's up?

598
00:29:23,142 --> 00:29:24,884
You know, I know
you were pretty
upset last night.

599
00:29:24,884 --> 00:29:26,265
Caitlin seemed like
an awesome girl.

600
00:29:26,265 --> 00:29:27,386
Aw!

601
00:29:27,596 --> 00:29:29,388
I just wanted to make sure
you were doing okay.

602
00:29:29,598 --> 00:29:31,100
Oh, yeah. I'm fine.

603
00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:33,813
I mean, considering.

604
00:29:34,063 --> 00:29:35,564
It's really sweet
of you to call.

605
00:29:36,395 --> 00:29:38,898
I must have seemed like
a total lunatic last night.

606
00:29:39,108 --> 00:29:41,951
(LAUGHS)
Not to me, you didn't.

607
00:29:42,862 --> 00:29:43,953
(CHUCKLES)

608
00:29:44,403 --> 00:29:46,575
You still into
country line dancing?

609
00:29:46,785 --> 00:29:48,207
I know this great place
in the valley.

610
00:29:48,207 --> 00:29:51,750
What? Wait, wait, wait.
When was I ever into
country line dancing?

611
00:29:52,171 --> 00:29:53,752
Try all through college.

612
00:29:53,963 --> 00:29:56,085
No. Uh-uh.
That was you.

613
00:29:56,085 --> 00:29:57,466
You were into
line dancing.

614
00:29:57,466 --> 00:30:00,419
I only went along with it
because I thought
the boots were hot.

615
00:30:00,419 --> 00:30:01,720
(CHUCKLES) Okay.

616
00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:05,424
Well, you know, they also
have really great tacos.
You still like those?

617
00:30:05,424 --> 00:30:07,516
Yes, I still like tacos.

618
00:30:07,766 --> 00:30:10,229
(LAUGHS) All right.
Then how about it, huh?

619
00:30:10,519 --> 00:30:13,102
Say I'll pick
you up around,
I don't know, 8:00?

620
00:30:13,692 --> 00:30:16,896
You wear the sexy boots,
and I'll wear
the oversized cowboy hat.

621
00:30:16,896 --> 00:30:19,778
Great. I mean...

622
00:30:19,778 --> 00:30:21,400
Yeah. Well, maybe.

623
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:22,651
You know, I have to
check my schedule.

624
00:30:22,862 --> 00:30:26,615
Can I call you back
and then we'll,
you know...

625
00:30:27,246 --> 00:30:28,367
It sounds like a plan.

626
00:30:28,577 --> 00:30:30,579
Oh, great.
Okay, thanks. Bye.

627
00:30:30,579 --> 00:30:32,872
What was that?
What?

628
00:30:32,872 --> 00:30:34,373
Why didn't you make
a date with him?

629
00:30:34,373 --> 00:30:36,585
I'm dating Andrew.
Hello.

630
00:30:36,585 --> 00:30:38,717
Please.
Patrick is so much
better than Andrew.

631
00:30:39,378 --> 00:30:41,170
You're just saying that
because he complimented you.

632
00:30:41,170 --> 00:30:43,632
No. I like him
because he's funny,

633
00:30:43,632 --> 00:30:45,634
he's gorgeous and
he smells like cake.

634
00:30:46,555 --> 00:30:48,307
I know. He does, right?

635
00:30:49,678 --> 00:30:53,062
Stop. Anything with Patrick
and I is all in the past.

636
00:30:53,772 --> 00:30:55,394
I'm happy with Andrew.
But Patrick...

637
00:30:55,394 --> 00:30:57,526
Look. You want me to
change my ways?

638
00:30:57,937 --> 00:31:01,070
Well then, help me out
with pulling off this party
and getting that promotion,

639
00:31:01,070 --> 00:31:02,281
and that will change
my entire life.

640
00:31:02,861 --> 00:31:03,943
Fine.

641
00:31:06,245 --> 00:31:07,987
There. That ought
to do it.

642
00:31:09,949 --> 00:31:13,412
I have got the phone numbers
of everyone who's anyone
in Hollywood.

643
00:31:14,203 --> 00:31:15,254
Now you do, too.

644
00:31:16,625 --> 00:31:19,258
Now don't you feel bad
for yelling at me
to go away before?

645
00:31:19,668 --> 00:31:21,380
I do. I'm sorry.

646
00:31:24,093 --> 00:31:26,505
(LAUGHS)
You should be sorry! Sucka!

647
00:31:38,727 --> 00:31:40,859
Okay, I've texted,

648
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:43,983
emailed, tweeted, and IM-ed
every big name in town.

649
00:31:43,983 --> 00:31:46,735
I... Ah, that's it
for me tonight.

650
00:31:46,735 --> 00:31:48,787
I'm going to go home
and get some sleep.

651
00:31:49,328 --> 00:31:51,080
But it's almost midnight.
So?

652
00:31:51,580 --> 00:31:53,332
I told you.

653
00:31:53,622 --> 00:31:56,455
(IN DEEP TONE)
You are going to be
visited by three ghosts

654
00:31:56,455 --> 00:32:00,209
at the stroke of midnight
for the next three nights.

655
00:32:00,629 --> 00:32:02,711
(IN NORMAL TONE)
You know, I really should
have won Best Actress.

656
00:32:02,711 --> 00:32:04,803
Wait, so you mean...
(SIGHS)

657
00:32:05,344 --> 00:32:08,007
You mean the crap
you said in my apartment
last night was true?

658
00:32:08,007 --> 00:32:09,598
What, you think
I came back
from the grave

659
00:32:09,598 --> 00:32:11,100
to hook you up
with Brangelina?

660
00:32:11,430 --> 00:32:13,892
I am so not in the mood
to meet Casper tonight.

661
00:32:32,071 --> 00:32:34,783
What? Where are we?

662
00:32:36,495 --> 00:32:38,377
Why are you taking
your shoes off?

663
00:32:38,837 --> 00:32:42,001
Oh, I miss the feeling of
fake grass beneath my toes.
(CHURCH BELL TOLLS)

664
00:32:42,001 --> 00:32:44,503
(CROWD CHEERING FAINTLY)
Okay. What in the world
is going on right now?

665
00:32:44,503 --> 00:32:46,005
The clock just
struck 12:00.

666
00:32:47,256 --> 00:32:50,349
CHEERLEADERS:
Are we ready? Yes, we are!

667
00:32:50,589 --> 00:32:52,931
Yes, yes, yes we do!

668
00:32:52,931 --> 00:32:54,683
We got spirit,
how about you?

669
00:32:55,224 --> 00:32:56,935
(CHEERLEADERS SCREAMING)

670
00:33:02,191 --> 00:33:05,194
Oh, my God, is that...
That looks like Brad!

671
00:33:05,654 --> 00:33:07,316
He was my first
boyfriend.

672
00:33:07,526 --> 00:33:09,488
Well, my first
everything.

673
00:33:09,488 --> 00:33:10,949
(LAUGHS) You slut!

674
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:12,741
You! Put! Out!

675
00:33:12,741 --> 00:33:14,163
She! Put! Out!

676
00:33:14,163 --> 00:33:15,244
(CHUCKLES)

677
00:33:17,416 --> 00:33:20,079
Okay,
but what in the world
is he be doing here?

678
00:33:20,619 --> 00:33:23,042
Well, since I came
here to help you
change your ways

679
00:33:23,042 --> 00:33:24,383
by fixing
your love life

680
00:33:24,383 --> 00:33:28,387
instead of the traditional,
ordinary, boring ghosts
like they have in Dickens,

681
00:33:28,387 --> 00:33:31,970
I've arranged for you to
be visited by the spirits
of three ex-boyfriends.

682
00:33:32,761 --> 00:33:34,513
Wait a minute.
Are you telling me that

683
00:33:34,513 --> 00:33:36,395
Brad is the Ghost of
Christmas Past?

684
00:33:36,685 --> 00:33:40,059
Actually,
as your ex-boyfriend,
he's the Ghost of Ex-mas Past!

685
00:33:41,190 --> 00:33:42,521
I have got to cheer.

686
00:33:45,984 --> 00:33:48,947
(WHOOPS)
Merry Ex-Mas!
All right!

687
00:33:48,947 --> 00:33:50,409
That's what
I'm talking about.

688
00:33:50,409 --> 00:33:52,151
(WHOOPING)
(WHISTLE BLOWING)

689
00:33:58,617 --> 00:34:01,710
Wow! Brad,
I can't believe
it's really you.

690
00:34:02,211 --> 00:34:04,213
Oh, my God,
are you dead?

691
00:34:05,084 --> 00:34:06,755
Yes, and it's
because of you.

692
00:34:08,217 --> 00:34:10,299
I guess you can die
from a broken heart.

693
00:34:11,510 --> 00:34:14,723
I'm just kidding!
I'm not the actual Brad
that you dated,

694
00:34:14,723 --> 00:34:16,175
I'm just his spirit.

695
00:34:16,435 --> 00:34:18,477
The real Brad you know
is alive and well, I swear.

696
00:34:18,477 --> 00:34:19,728
So why do you
look like him?

697
00:34:19,728 --> 00:34:21,560
To help you emotionally
access your past

698
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:24,353
because, to you,
Brad represents an
idealized view of love.

699
00:34:25,854 --> 00:34:28,277
It took me, like,
an hour to memorize that.

700
00:34:28,857 --> 00:34:30,989
Since you and Brad
dated so long ago,

701
00:34:30,989 --> 00:34:33,782
I thought he'd be
the perfect ex-boyfriend
to show you your past.

702
00:34:34,243 --> 00:34:36,285
I know you.
You're in Blood Prom!

703
00:34:36,285 --> 00:34:38,076
You're the one
who got decapitated.

704
00:34:38,076 --> 00:34:39,788
Sorority sister
number two.

705
00:34:39,788 --> 00:34:41,790
That was the first movie
I ever did.

706
00:34:41,790 --> 00:34:43,041
You were awesome
in that.

707
00:34:43,502 --> 00:34:45,254
I saw your boobs.
Congrats.

708
00:34:46,415 --> 00:34:48,547
Ghost of Brad,
meet Ghost of Caitlin.

709
00:34:48,797 --> 00:34:51,130
I hope you don't mind
if I tag along
with you guys.

710
00:34:51,130 --> 00:34:54,012
Technically, I'm not
supposed to horn in on
the other ghosts' time,

711
00:34:54,012 --> 00:34:55,013
but I got bored.

712
00:34:55,424 --> 00:34:57,806
That's cool,
you should stay.
Hang out with us.

713
00:34:58,217 --> 00:34:59,848
Yeah. It'll be a blast!

714
00:35:00,349 --> 00:35:02,221
Yeah, it will.
Ready to get started?

715
00:35:02,561 --> 00:35:03,682
Do I have a choice?

716
00:35:03,682 --> 00:35:04,893
No.
No.

717
00:35:04,893 --> 00:35:07,816
(GASPS) Oh, my God,
that's me and my mom!

718
00:35:08,357 --> 00:35:10,989
Oh, you were so cute.
What happened?

719
00:35:11,530 --> 00:35:13,192
This is where
it all started.

720
00:35:13,612 --> 00:35:16,195
Okay, now, sweetie.
what's the golden rule?

721
00:35:16,535 --> 00:35:18,997
"It's just as easy
to marry a rich man

722
00:35:18,997 --> 00:35:20,949
"as it is to marry
a poor one."

723
00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:22,661
Good girl.

724
00:35:22,951 --> 00:35:25,664
See, it's not
really your fault
you're so shallow.

725
00:35:26,165 --> 00:35:27,956
You were just taught
from a very young age.

726
00:35:27,956 --> 00:35:30,629
Oh, so we're blaming
all my problems
on my mother?

727
00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:32,711
Well, guess what,
I'm nothing like her.

728
00:35:32,711 --> 00:35:34,012
(LAUGHING)

729
00:35:34,213 --> 00:35:36,635
Are you kidding?
You're exactly like her.

730
00:35:37,386 --> 00:35:39,598
Hey, Sloane.
Can I talk to you
for a second?

731
00:35:39,888 --> 00:35:41,560
Hi, Darin,
what's up?

732
00:35:43,101 --> 00:35:45,394
You know the
Snowflake Formal
is next week...

733
00:35:45,394 --> 00:35:46,645
I know,
I can't wait.

734
00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:47,976
Yeah, me neither.

735
00:35:48,227 --> 00:35:49,358
Oh, are you going?

736
00:35:50,068 --> 00:35:52,321
No. I mean, not yet.

737
00:35:52,861 --> 00:35:55,944
I mean, I want to.
Which is why I'm here.

738
00:35:56,865 --> 00:36:00,158
See, I've always
really liked you...

739
00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:01,660
Oh, my God,
here comes me!

740
00:36:01,660 --> 00:36:03,121
Oh, my God,
here comes Brad.

741
00:36:03,121 --> 00:36:05,244
Hey, Sloane, want to
go to the dance?

742
00:36:05,244 --> 00:36:06,665
(GASPS)

743
00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:08,166
I was hoping you'd ask.

744
00:36:08,417 --> 00:36:09,998
Dude, you totally
crotch-blocked him.

745
00:36:11,250 --> 00:36:12,341
That was sweet.

746
00:36:12,631 --> 00:36:13,792
(GIGGLES)

747
00:36:15,173 --> 00:36:16,755
Take a picture,
it'll last longer.

748
00:36:16,755 --> 00:36:18,096
(BRAD AND SLOANE LAUGHING)

749
00:36:19,848 --> 00:36:20,929
Who was that guy?

750
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:23,222
So, are you going to
rent a limo?

751
00:36:23,562 --> 00:36:24,723
Totally.

752
00:36:25,804 --> 00:36:28,227
See that?
This was the first time

753
00:36:28,227 --> 00:36:30,939
you left a guy hanging
when someone better
came along.

754
00:36:30,939 --> 00:36:32,691
Not the last, though.

755
00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:38,367
SLOANE: I cannot believe
Mike finally called you!

756
00:36:38,367 --> 00:36:39,738
I know!

757
00:36:39,738 --> 00:36:42,661
Okay, I've been crushing
on him for, like, ever.

758
00:36:42,661 --> 00:36:45,324
So I need to wear
something hot,

759
00:36:45,584 --> 00:36:48,206
maybe a little bit slutty,
so that when we go out...

760
00:36:48,206 --> 00:36:49,378
He'll want to stay in.
Exactly!

761
00:36:49,378 --> 00:36:50,959
Yes!
(BOTH CHUCKLING)

762
00:36:51,420 --> 00:36:53,382
Okay, what do you
have in mind?

763
00:36:53,382 --> 00:36:57,175
Okay, ideally, I would
like to find something

764
00:36:57,175 --> 00:36:59,508
exactly like your
worship-me dress.

765
00:36:59,888 --> 00:37:01,550
Oh, okay.
Okay.

766
00:37:01,550 --> 00:37:03,221
But under 10 bucks.

767
00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:04,603
Oh, what?

768
00:37:04,603 --> 00:37:07,055
I know. I maxed out
my Visa getting a
plane ticket home,

769
00:37:07,055 --> 00:37:08,607
so I am broke.

770
00:37:09,017 --> 00:37:12,651
Well, luckily for you,
I know a little store
called Sloane's Closet.

771
00:37:12,651 --> 00:37:14,983
And I think
you'll find exactly
what you want in there.

772
00:37:15,193 --> 00:37:16,945
JENNY: You'll let me borrow
your worship-me dress?

773
00:37:16,945 --> 00:37:18,777
SLOANE: Although,
I'm sure if you're
wearing the dress,

774
00:37:18,777 --> 00:37:21,069
I'm gonna have
to keep the dorm room
cleared out for the night.

775
00:37:21,069 --> 00:37:22,781
Shut up.

776
00:37:22,991 --> 00:37:24,913
You know,
you're really lucky
you have Patrick

777
00:37:24,913 --> 00:37:28,166
because he would
worship you even if
you were in a paper bag.

778
00:37:28,166 --> 00:37:29,708
I am pretty lucky,
aren't I?

779
00:37:31,039 --> 00:37:33,502
Oh, well, speaking of
clearing out...

780
00:37:35,083 --> 00:37:36,214
Hi.

781
00:37:36,214 --> 00:37:37,716
Oh, hey, babe.

782
00:37:37,716 --> 00:37:39,137
Hey.

783
00:37:40,218 --> 00:37:42,090
Hi, Jenny.
Hi, Patrick.

784
00:37:42,090 --> 00:37:45,143
Oh, how sweet.
It's the guy you
dumped me for!

785
00:37:45,143 --> 00:37:46,975
I dumped you because
I was going to college

786
00:37:46,975 --> 00:37:49,097
and you were staying back
to work in a tollbooth.

787
00:37:49,308 --> 00:37:50,729
See? Trading up.

788
00:37:51,019 --> 00:37:53,352
Okay, I'm gonna go.

789
00:37:53,352 --> 00:37:54,693
Bye.
Bye.

790
00:37:55,103 --> 00:37:57,896
Okay, colored lights
or red lights on the tree?

791
00:37:58,156 --> 00:37:59,778
Colored. And blinking.

792
00:38:00,198 --> 00:38:01,700
With at least one
strand burned out.

793
00:38:01,990 --> 00:38:03,201
(LAUGHING)

794
00:38:03,201 --> 00:38:05,784
All right, it's my turn now.
Christmas ham
or Christmas turkey?

795
00:38:05,784 --> 00:38:07,536
Turkey. Duh!

796
00:38:07,536 --> 00:38:09,207
Ham is for Easter.

797
00:38:09,207 --> 00:38:10,579
Never let my grandma
hear you say that.

798
00:38:10,579 --> 00:38:12,501
She'll clobber you
with her basting spoon.

799
00:38:12,501 --> 00:38:14,042
I'm not kidding.
All right, all right.

800
00:38:14,042 --> 00:38:16,214
Frosty or Rudolph?

801
00:38:16,465 --> 00:38:18,717
The Grinch!
Me, too!

802
00:38:18,717 --> 00:38:20,419
Oh, I've got one.
Okay.

803
00:38:21,420 --> 00:38:23,051
Letters to Santa...
Hmm.

804
00:38:23,051 --> 00:38:25,804
...or sitting on Santa's lap
telling him what you want?

805
00:38:25,804 --> 00:38:27,135
Oh, the lap, definitely.

806
00:38:27,726 --> 00:38:30,479
Well, I always figured
I'd have a way better shot
at convincing him

807
00:38:30,479 --> 00:38:32,230
to bring me the pony
if I asked him in person.

808
00:38:32,521 --> 00:38:34,643
(LAUGHS)
Well, yeah,
that never happened.

809
00:38:35,524 --> 00:38:36,695
Well, here's
your chance.

810
00:38:38,857 --> 00:38:42,320
Go on, hop on up there.
One lap, no waiting.

811
00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:44,242
Yeah, but that's
for the kids.
I'm way too old.

812
00:38:44,242 --> 00:38:46,204
No, no, you're not.
Come on, it'll be fun.

813
00:38:46,865 --> 00:38:49,157
Tell Santa to hear your
Christmas wish list.

814
00:38:49,157 --> 00:38:51,370
You know what?
I've already got
exactly what I want.

815
00:38:51,370 --> 00:38:52,501
Come on.

816
00:38:52,911 --> 00:38:55,163
Hey!
Let's go, buddy.

817
00:38:55,163 --> 00:38:56,545
Okay, smile.

818
00:38:57,215 --> 00:38:58,377
(CHUCKLING)

819
00:38:58,377 --> 00:39:00,719
Cute, Santa.
Merry Christmas.

820
00:39:01,219 --> 00:39:02,421
SANTA: Ho! Ho! Ho!

821
00:39:02,421 --> 00:39:04,092
CAITLIN: This picture
is adorable.

822
00:39:04,593 --> 00:39:06,344
Looks like you guys
were in love.

823
00:39:06,344 --> 00:39:08,387
I never said
we weren't.

824
00:39:08,387 --> 00:39:10,018
Then how could you
let this happen?

825
00:39:30,038 --> 00:39:31,870
What'd you do,
sneak out in the middle
of the night?

826
00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:34,453
No. I waited till
he went off to class,

827
00:39:34,453 --> 00:39:35,664
and then
I packed up
my car.

828
00:39:39,548 --> 00:39:42,711
Come on.
He was going off to
medical school in Iowa.

829
00:39:43,211 --> 00:39:44,553
What was I going
to do there?

830
00:39:44,553 --> 00:39:46,675
Wear some overalls
and watch the corn grow?

831
00:39:47,556 --> 00:39:50,679
It was unfair of him
to ask me to go with him.

832
00:39:50,679 --> 00:39:52,511
Okay, so you didn't
trade up from a guy,

833
00:39:52,511 --> 00:39:54,182
you traded up
for what?

834
00:39:54,723 --> 00:39:56,605
Glamour?
A bigger paycheck?

835
00:39:56,605 --> 00:39:58,106
Okay, I made a choice.

836
00:39:58,106 --> 00:40:00,188
I'm allowed to breakup
with a guy if I want to.

837
00:40:01,690 --> 00:40:03,071
But you didn't even
have the guts

838
00:40:03,071 --> 00:40:04,443
to tell him in person
you were leaving him?

839
00:40:05,193 --> 00:40:07,526
That's cold, Sloane.
Even for you.

840
00:40:07,526 --> 00:40:09,327
Hey, if I want
the opinion

841
00:40:09,327 --> 00:40:11,079
of some dead B-lister,
I'll ask, okay?

842
00:40:11,910 --> 00:40:13,291
(MIMICS CAT MEOWING)

843
00:40:13,912 --> 00:40:15,534
What? Two chicks
fighting is hot.

844
00:40:16,495 --> 00:40:18,036
Okay. What do you
want from me?

845
00:40:18,036 --> 00:40:19,918
He was my college
boyfriend, that's all.

846
00:40:20,378 --> 00:40:23,752
It's not like we were
to spend the rest
of our lives together.

847
00:40:32,721 --> 00:40:33,892
He was going
to propose?

848
00:40:36,555 --> 00:40:39,317
I didn't know.
How was I supposed
to know that?

849
00:40:39,317 --> 00:40:40,438
You couldn't have.

850
00:40:40,819 --> 00:40:43,982
You didn't stick around
long enough to find out.

851
00:40:52,531 --> 00:40:54,833
(SCOFFS)
It's barely
a quarter carat.

852
00:40:54,833 --> 00:40:57,245
I would have held out
for something better, too.

853
00:40:58,076 --> 00:40:59,417
Oh, you went
for something
better, all right.

854
00:41:04,002 --> 00:41:05,383
You made trading up
an art form.

855
00:41:06,004 --> 00:41:07,716
(INAUDIBLE)

856
00:41:15,353 --> 00:41:17,516
Wait, you slept
with Jason?

857
00:41:17,516 --> 00:41:18,727
You are such a slut!

858
00:41:19,357 --> 00:41:20,899
I like it!

859
00:41:20,899 --> 00:41:22,691
And you traded up
from him to Andrew.

860
00:41:22,691 --> 00:41:24,152
And that's where
I'm going to stay.

861
00:41:24,362 --> 00:41:26,364
No. What's so wrong
with trading up?

862
00:41:26,364 --> 00:41:28,777
The older you get,
the more you know
what you want.

863
00:41:28,777 --> 00:41:30,198
But you're not
going after what
your heart wants.

864
00:41:30,909 --> 00:41:33,702
All you care about is
the shiny wrappings,
not what's inside.

865
00:41:33,702 --> 00:41:36,494
Bull.
Andrew's everything
I've been looking for.

866
00:41:36,494 --> 00:41:39,327
He's powerful,
ambitious,
well-connected.

867
00:41:39,618 --> 00:41:41,419
His family practically
built Hollywood.

868
00:41:41,419 --> 00:41:44,623
Plus, he's got an ass
you just want to
sink your teeth into.

869
00:41:44,623 --> 00:41:46,084
Oh, yes, he does.

870
00:41:46,084 --> 00:41:47,335
I'm not trading him in
for anyone.

871
00:41:47,716 --> 00:41:50,088
Hmm. But would he say
the same thing about you?

872
00:41:50,629 --> 00:41:51,890
No doubt.

873
00:41:53,221 --> 00:41:55,554
You're not
the only one looking
for the shiniest penny.

874
00:41:56,264 --> 00:41:59,017
What do you think he's doing
all those late nights
when he's not with you?

875
00:41:59,017 --> 00:42:00,809
Meeting with clients.

876
00:42:00,809 --> 00:42:03,021
Yeah, blonde clients
willing to do anything

877
00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:04,563
to break
into Hollywood.

878
00:42:04,563 --> 00:42:06,024
You're lying.

879
00:42:19,658 --> 00:42:20,709
Nice nap?

880
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:23,211
(SIGHS)

881
00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:30,008
You know, I only got
two hours of sleep,

882
00:42:30,008 --> 00:42:31,720
because of you
and your damn
ghost parade.

883
00:42:31,930 --> 00:42:33,762
(SIGHING)

884
00:42:34,302 --> 00:42:36,134
He was lying,
wasn't he?

885
00:42:39,227 --> 00:42:40,268
I thought you knew.

886
00:42:43,441 --> 00:42:44,562
I mean,
everybody knows.

887
00:42:47,986 --> 00:42:49,277
Did you and Andrew...

888
00:42:49,527 --> 00:42:51,690
Ew! No! He's like 30.

889
00:42:52,070 --> 00:42:53,071
Gross.

890
00:43:06,915 --> 00:43:08,376
Jeez, Sloane,
you look exhausted.

891
00:43:08,376 --> 00:43:10,338
You didn't let any clients
see you like that, did you?

892
00:43:10,338 --> 00:43:11,469
(EXCLAIMS)

893
00:43:11,469 --> 00:43:12,550
The hell?
What was that for?

894
00:43:12,550 --> 00:43:13,551
The blonde!

895
00:43:13,882 --> 00:43:14,883
Which blonde?

896
00:43:15,303 --> 00:43:16,344
There was more than one?

897
00:43:31,860 --> 00:43:33,191
SLOANE: I can't believe
you cheated on me.

898
00:43:33,191 --> 00:43:35,864
Sloane, it was one time
and she meant nothing to me.

899
00:43:35,864 --> 00:43:37,656
I can't even remember
Sarah's name!

900
00:43:37,656 --> 00:43:38,867
Sarah?

901
00:43:38,867 --> 00:43:40,949
Sarah, Debra...
Whatever.

902
00:43:40,949 --> 00:43:42,580
Look, please give me
a chance to make this
up to you.

903
00:43:42,580 --> 00:43:44,042
We've got our reservations
at Panache tonight.

904
00:43:44,042 --> 00:43:46,044
Let's go out,
you and me,

905
00:43:46,044 --> 00:43:48,747
and just spend
some time together,
out of the office.

906
00:43:48,747 --> 00:43:52,380
Let's not let my little
mistake turn into a tragedy
by losing our table.

907
00:43:52,590 --> 00:43:54,132
Little mistake?

908
00:43:54,552 --> 00:43:56,845
The only mistake I made
was trusting you.

909
00:43:57,135 --> 00:43:58,927
And those reservations
are mine.

910
00:43:58,927 --> 00:44:01,349
I'm going to dinner
and you can't come.

911
00:44:02,100 --> 00:44:03,221
Sloane...

912
00:44:03,521 --> 00:44:06,144
(CHOKING) What the...

913
00:44:08,026 --> 00:44:09,187
Is that vodka?

914
00:44:11,529 --> 00:44:13,531
Oh, my God,
where did that
come from?

915
00:44:16,194 --> 00:44:18,947
I'm sorry, Sloane.
This completely sucks.

916
00:44:18,947 --> 00:44:22,200
I know.
I'm never gonna get
that promotion now.

917
00:44:22,871 --> 00:44:25,373
Andrew's father
owns this firm.

918
00:44:25,373 --> 00:44:26,544
Hell, he... He...

919
00:44:27,836 --> 00:44:28,837
Hey!

920
00:44:30,128 --> 00:44:32,000
He practically owns
half of Hollywood.

921
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:34,923
And now that
Andrew and I broke up,
he'll probably fire me.

922
00:44:34,923 --> 00:44:36,755
Might even have
me blacklisted.

923
00:44:37,055 --> 00:44:38,556
(GASPS) Oh, God!

924
00:44:39,427 --> 00:44:40,598
I'm going to have to
move to the Valley.

925
00:44:41,009 --> 00:44:44,062
And do PR for people
that are castmates
on Rock of Love.

926
00:44:44,062 --> 00:44:45,263
My life is over!

927
00:44:45,894 --> 00:44:47,395
Yeah, I know
how you feel.

928
00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:49,808
Sorry.

929
00:44:50,108 --> 00:44:51,149
It's fine.

930
00:44:51,689 --> 00:44:53,071
Look, Andrew's a jerk.

931
00:44:53,401 --> 00:44:55,193
You should go out
and bang someone
else to get even.

932
00:44:55,193 --> 00:44:56,194
That's what I'd do.

933
00:44:56,945 --> 00:44:57,986
Patrick!

934
00:45:00,318 --> 00:45:03,031
I'm not going to
sleep with Patrick
to get back at Andrew.

935
00:45:03,531 --> 00:45:06,584
Okay, well, why not
sleep with Patrick
for no reason at all?

936
00:45:10,919 --> 00:45:12,630
Sloane! How you doing?

937
00:45:12,831 --> 00:45:14,422
Uh, good, good.

938
00:45:15,423 --> 00:45:18,336
You know, I am free
tonight and I wanted
to see what you're up to.

939
00:45:18,336 --> 00:45:19,677
Uh, you want
to go to dinner,

940
00:45:19,677 --> 00:45:21,139
Panache? 9:00?

941
00:45:21,429 --> 00:45:22,470
Definitely.

942
00:45:23,261 --> 00:45:24,342
See you then.

943
00:45:25,393 --> 00:45:26,434
(BOTH SQUEAL)

944
00:45:26,434 --> 00:45:27,515
Mission accomplished!

945
00:45:27,806 --> 00:45:29,227
Hey, Sloane,

946
00:45:29,517 --> 00:45:31,519
I heard you
and Andrew broke up.

947
00:45:34,352 --> 00:45:35,443
Who's winning now?

948
00:45:36,694 --> 00:45:37,816
(SCOFFS)

949
00:45:38,196 --> 00:45:39,527
What a dill weed.

950
00:45:39,527 --> 00:45:40,658
Yeah, screw him.

951
00:45:40,658 --> 00:45:42,781
You know,
we'll see who's laughing
when I get that promotion.

952
00:45:43,361 --> 00:45:44,412
Sloane, you know
that Andrew...

953
00:45:44,412 --> 00:45:45,533
Screw him, too!

954
00:45:45,533 --> 00:45:47,455
You know what?
He doesn't decide
who gets the VP slot,

955
00:45:47,455 --> 00:45:48,536
his dad does.

956
00:45:48,536 --> 00:45:51,419
And when I show Carl
what a kickass memorial
that I can throw,

957
00:45:51,419 --> 00:45:54,502
I will get the promotion
whether I'm dating Andrew
or not.

958
00:45:54,502 --> 00:45:56,254
I am loving the new you.

959
00:45:56,584 --> 00:45:59,137
Screw you all!
We've got a party to plan.

960
00:45:59,137 --> 00:46:00,138
SLOANE: Let's go
to your house.

961
00:46:01,299 --> 00:46:04,382
Okay, you have to help me
pick out the most amazing
dress to wear

962
00:46:04,382 --> 00:46:05,643
to my memorial.

963
00:46:05,643 --> 00:46:07,305
I want to be
the first person ever

964
00:46:07,305 --> 00:46:10,018
to make it on to
the best-dressed list
posthumously.

965
00:46:11,019 --> 00:46:12,230
Sounds like fun.

966
00:46:16,815 --> 00:46:20,899
Um, usually people wear
something a little more
conservative in the afterlife.

967
00:46:22,951 --> 00:46:24,742
What did I die of, boredom?

968
00:46:31,079 --> 00:46:32,410
You look like Big Bird.

969
00:46:35,293 --> 00:46:36,754
I think
we have a winner!

970
00:46:40,298 --> 00:46:42,380
Damn! I am
one hot corpse.

971
00:46:44,382 --> 00:46:45,473
Okay, now what?

972
00:46:46,014 --> 00:46:47,345
Well, uh,
now I got to run.

973
00:46:47,345 --> 00:46:49,557
Oh! I'm going to be
late to meet Patrick
for dinner.

974
00:46:50,268 --> 00:46:52,931
Okay, you cannot
go to Panache
looking like that.

975
00:47:05,033 --> 00:47:07,205
I'm seeing this patient,
little girl,

976
00:47:07,365 --> 00:47:08,496
and she's, uh...

977
00:47:09,207 --> 00:47:14,082
She stuck six string beans
all the way up her nose,
just one after the other.

978
00:47:14,502 --> 00:47:17,005
Oh, my God,
what did you do?

979
00:47:17,215 --> 00:47:18,376
I told her
she wasn't eating right.

980
00:47:18,836 --> 00:47:19,958
(LAUGHING)

981
00:47:23,171 --> 00:47:24,512
It's like deja vu, huh?

982
00:47:24,802 --> 00:47:25,843
Us having dinner.

983
00:47:26,804 --> 00:47:29,928
Hmm. Me telling
terrible jokes
and you...

984
00:47:30,678 --> 00:47:31,809
Molting.

985
00:47:31,809 --> 00:47:34,272
(STAMMERING) Okay,
it was the only
thing that fit.

986
00:47:34,272 --> 00:47:36,234
I didn't have the time
to find anything to wear.

987
00:47:36,234 --> 00:47:37,395
I've been
a little stressed.

988
00:47:38,186 --> 00:47:40,028
It is a good thing
you're dining
with Dr. Love.

989
00:47:40,438 --> 00:47:41,529
Dr. Love?

990
00:47:41,900 --> 00:47:44,402
(CHUCKLING)
Well, it's either that
or Dr. Feel-Good.

991
00:47:44,943 --> 00:47:47,195
Drink two of these.
Call me in the morning.

992
00:47:48,656 --> 00:47:50,698
You were always good
at making me laugh.

993
00:47:51,199 --> 00:47:52,250
Yeah?

994
00:47:52,250 --> 00:47:53,371
Yeah, I miss that.

995
00:47:54,202 --> 00:47:55,203
I miss you.

996
00:47:55,703 --> 00:47:57,835
Yeah, well,
I got to be honest.

997
00:47:57,835 --> 00:47:59,918
I was a little nervous
about meeting you tonight.

998
00:47:59,918 --> 00:48:01,129
What? Why?

999
00:48:01,129 --> 00:48:03,421
Ah, 'cause, you know,
what if you'd changed,

1000
00:48:03,421 --> 00:48:05,173
and you weren't
the same girl that
I'd fell in love with?

1001
00:48:06,634 --> 00:48:10,388
What I was really
scared of is what if
you hadn't changed

1002
00:48:11,389 --> 00:48:12,850
and all those feelings
came rushing back?

1003
00:48:14,142 --> 00:48:15,893
(SIGHING) Patrick.

1004
00:48:16,274 --> 00:48:17,355
Sloane.

1005
00:48:19,107 --> 00:48:20,188
Come here.

1006
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:23,571
ANDREW: Sloane!

1007
00:48:23,901 --> 00:48:26,114
Andrew? What...
What are you
doing here?

1008
00:48:26,654 --> 00:48:27,825
Who's this guy?

1009
00:48:27,825 --> 00:48:29,907
This is my...boss,
Andrew.

1010
00:48:29,907 --> 00:48:31,289
Andrew,
this is Patrick.

1011
00:48:31,289 --> 00:48:32,290
Hey, how're you doing?

1012
00:48:33,031 --> 00:48:35,833
I was going to wait
until Christmas
to do this, but, um...

1013
00:48:38,957 --> 00:48:41,960
Okay!
What's going on here?

1014
00:48:41,960 --> 00:48:46,044
Patrick, I am so sorry.
I have no idea
what he is doing.

1015
00:48:46,044 --> 00:48:49,217
Sloane, this morning
you told me that the only
way you would take me back

1016
00:48:49,507 --> 00:48:51,469
was that if I could prove
that I'm committed to you

1017
00:48:52,390 --> 00:48:53,391
and only you.

1018
00:48:53,721 --> 00:48:54,973
Is this proof enough?

1019
00:48:57,355 --> 00:48:58,646
(LAUGHING)

1020
00:49:00,768 --> 00:49:01,819
Marry me.

1021
00:49:02,110 --> 00:49:04,362
What? (LAUGHING) Okay.

1022
00:49:04,822 --> 00:49:09,067
(STAMMERING)
I don't know
what to say.

1023
00:49:13,201 --> 00:49:14,702
ALL: Say yes!

1024
00:49:25,043 --> 00:49:26,634
I can't believe
you did all this!

1025
00:49:26,634 --> 00:49:27,925
So, what do you say?

1026
00:49:29,887 --> 00:49:31,139
Yes!

1027
00:49:31,139 --> 00:49:32,390
(PEOPLE CHEERING)

1028
00:49:56,744 --> 00:49:58,826
SLOANE: (GIGGLING)
Don't you love it?

1029
00:49:58,826 --> 00:49:59,997
It's beautiful.

1030
00:50:03,251 --> 00:50:05,123
Ah!
Beautiful.

1031
00:50:05,383 --> 00:50:07,465
Wow!
It's perfect
for you.

1032
00:50:10,798 --> 00:50:12,130
Are you happy?

1033
00:50:12,130 --> 00:50:14,342
I'm ecstatic.
We're getting married!

1034
00:50:14,762 --> 00:50:15,933
Sweet!

1035
00:50:19,977 --> 00:50:21,139
(EXCLAIMS)

1036
00:50:22,190 --> 00:50:23,311
Still?

1037
00:50:23,311 --> 00:50:26,274
I thought you'd be gone.
Crossed over or whatever.

1038
00:50:26,564 --> 00:50:27,985
Why would you think that?

1039
00:50:27,985 --> 00:50:30,568
'Cause I heeded
your warning
and changed my life.

1040
00:50:31,489 --> 00:50:33,821
Oh, my God,
it's a glacier!

1041
00:50:33,821 --> 00:50:35,243
Congratulations!

1042
00:50:35,243 --> 00:50:37,865
Now that is quite
an improvement on the last
ring he bought you.

1043
00:50:37,865 --> 00:50:39,036
What are you
talking about?

1044
00:50:39,036 --> 00:50:41,119
That chip
Patrick bought you
in the past.

1045
00:50:41,329 --> 00:50:44,332
Caitlin.
I didn't choose Patrick.
I chose Andrew.

1046
00:50:45,123 --> 00:50:46,664
Well, good choice.

1047
00:50:46,664 --> 00:50:48,966
Come on!
Look, I'm going
to have it all.

1048
00:50:48,966 --> 00:50:51,219
The perfect job,
the perfect husband
the perfect life!

1049
00:50:51,509 --> 00:50:52,880
Yeah, well,
it won't be perfect.

1050
00:50:53,671 --> 00:50:55,843
You know, you haven't
changed your ways at all.

1051
00:50:55,843 --> 00:50:57,225
Not at all.

1052
00:50:58,346 --> 00:51:00,098
Hanging out by the
ladies' room, loser?

1053
00:51:00,098 --> 00:51:01,389
I came to find you.

1054
00:51:01,979 --> 00:51:04,442
Why, to congratulate
me on my engagement?

1055
00:51:04,442 --> 00:51:06,644
(LAUGHS)
No, because
it's midnight.

1056
00:51:06,644 --> 00:51:07,685
So what?

1057
00:51:09,147 --> 00:51:10,648
Do you want to tell
her or should I?

1058
00:51:11,779 --> 00:51:13,451
Wait, you can see her?

1059
00:51:13,651 --> 00:51:15,283
Duh! I'm the last guy
that dumped you.

1060
00:51:15,283 --> 00:51:16,824
I dumped you.
Whatever makes
you feel better.

1061
00:51:17,115 --> 00:51:19,407
Either way,
I'm your most
recent ex-boyfriend.

1062
00:51:19,787 --> 00:51:22,700
Sloane, meet
the Ghost of
Ex-mas Present.

1063
00:51:22,700 --> 00:51:24,412
Okay, so you're not
the real Jason,

1064
00:51:24,412 --> 00:51:26,504
you're just a spirit
that looks like him.

1065
00:51:26,504 --> 00:51:28,336
Bingo.
And I get to
show you

1066
00:51:28,336 --> 00:51:31,259
all the ways your
bitchitude affects
those around you.

1067
00:51:31,259 --> 00:51:32,420
Ooh, nice one!

1068
00:51:32,420 --> 00:51:33,511
Thank you.

1069
00:51:33,511 --> 00:51:36,634
Awesome. This is so much
more fun than celebrating
with my fiance.

1070
00:51:37,014 --> 00:51:39,427
Oh, you want to spend
time with the people
you care about?

1071
00:51:40,478 --> 00:51:41,929
Well, guess what,
so does everyone else.

1072
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:43,981
Don't cry, baby.

1073
00:51:45,433 --> 00:51:47,064
(SOBBING)
We'll still have
Christmas, just...

1074
00:51:48,486 --> 00:51:49,647
a day late.

1075
00:51:51,189 --> 00:51:54,192
Because Mommy
has to work
on Christmas Day.

1076
00:51:55,613 --> 00:51:56,824
Meanie!
I know.

1077
00:51:57,034 --> 00:51:59,697
What? We all have to
make sacrifices for work.

1078
00:51:59,997 --> 00:52:02,620
But you only make them
when they benefit who?

1079
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:04,452
Oh! You.

1080
00:52:09,337 --> 00:52:10,338
Hey, babe.

1081
00:52:10,838 --> 00:52:14,212
Sweetie, we should talk
about Christmas bonuses
for the staff.

1082
00:52:14,212 --> 00:52:16,214
We'll be lucky
to pay them at all.

1083
00:52:16,514 --> 00:52:17,715
It's that bad?

1084
00:52:17,715 --> 00:52:18,846
It is.

1085
00:52:19,677 --> 00:52:20,928
You know,

1086
00:52:21,599 --> 00:52:24,812
maybe once Sloane's clients
start using their
gift certificates,

1087
00:52:24,812 --> 00:52:26,184
business will pick up.

1088
00:52:26,184 --> 00:52:27,315
Don't hold your breath.

1089
00:52:27,315 --> 00:52:29,397
Oh! Oh, my God,
I forgot.

1090
00:52:29,897 --> 00:52:31,148
I'll just take care
of it tomorrow.

1091
00:52:31,689 --> 00:52:34,232
You're too late.
The firm's gift bags
are packed today.

1092
00:52:34,232 --> 00:52:35,483
You missed
your chance.

1093
00:52:35,483 --> 00:52:36,864
At least I offered.

1094
00:52:36,864 --> 00:52:38,616
Oh, I'm sure that'll
be a comfort to them

1095
00:52:38,616 --> 00:52:39,907
when the business
goes under.

1096
00:52:39,907 --> 00:52:41,489
ED: We're talking
about Sloane Spencer.

1097
00:52:41,489 --> 00:52:43,491
I don't know why
you even bother being
friends with her.

1098
00:52:43,491 --> 00:52:45,413
She was my roommate
in college.

1099
00:52:45,413 --> 00:52:46,494
What do you
want me to do,

1100
00:52:46,494 --> 00:52:47,835
just stop speaking
to her altogether?

1101
00:52:47,835 --> 00:52:50,087
If that'll stop her
taking you for granted?

1102
00:52:50,087 --> 00:52:51,168
Then yes.

1103
00:52:51,839 --> 00:52:52,920
Ed...

1104
00:52:54,171 --> 00:52:55,172
(SIGHS)

1105
00:52:56,173 --> 00:52:58,596
Oh! That was fun!
You ready to go?

1106
00:53:01,679 --> 00:53:03,511
You're going to
be so handsome!

1107
00:53:04,181 --> 00:53:05,353
(DOG WHINING)

1108
00:53:05,353 --> 00:53:06,604
(PHONE RINGING)

1109
00:53:06,604 --> 00:53:08,566
Oh! Hello?

1110
00:53:08,566 --> 00:53:10,438
Hey, baby. Bad news.

1111
00:53:10,808 --> 00:53:12,980
Uh, my business trip
got extended a few days.

1112
00:53:12,980 --> 00:53:14,812
I won't be back
tonight after all.

1113
00:53:15,072 --> 00:53:16,734
You're not coming home
for Christmas?

1114
00:53:16,734 --> 00:53:19,237
Sorry, Viv, but it's
a million dollar deal.

1115
00:53:20,197 --> 00:53:21,319
Tell you what,

1116
00:53:21,319 --> 00:53:23,871
buy yourself
something pretty,
that'll cheer you up.

1117
00:53:26,494 --> 00:53:28,165
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

1118
00:53:28,165 --> 00:53:29,247
Hello again.

1119
00:53:32,129 --> 00:53:34,001
SLOANE: Well,
she can just spend
the day with me.

1120
00:53:34,001 --> 00:53:35,793
I mean, no one wants to
be alone on Christmas.

1121
00:53:36,173 --> 00:53:38,466
You're going to be busy
working at Caitlin's party.

1122
00:53:38,756 --> 00:53:41,098
Unless you think
your mom is worth
skipping it.

1123
00:53:41,098 --> 00:53:42,640
(LAUGHS) No,
I can't skip that,

1124
00:53:42,640 --> 00:53:44,512
I'll lose the promotion
for sure.

1125
00:53:44,512 --> 00:53:46,804
I'll just see her
on the 26th. Who cares?

1126
00:53:46,804 --> 00:53:48,556
Not you.
That's for sure.

1127
00:53:49,307 --> 00:53:50,768
VIVIAN:
I think you need
a little brother.

1128
00:53:51,228 --> 00:53:55,813
Purebred, show quality,
wildly expensive
little brother.

1129
00:53:57,194 --> 00:54:00,318
All right, one more look
at Ex-mas Present to go.

1130
00:54:05,122 --> 00:54:08,576
MAN: (OVER EARPIECE)
I just heard we're doing six
days on location in Mexico.

1131
00:54:08,576 --> 00:54:09,827
Are you happy?

1132
00:54:09,827 --> 00:54:12,079
Hell, yeah!
I'm ecstatic!
We're getting married!

1133
00:54:12,290 --> 00:54:13,421
Sweet!

1134
00:54:13,421 --> 00:54:15,753
You're damn right,
it's sweet.
It's fantastic.

1135
00:54:16,173 --> 00:54:19,216
I don't believe it.
He was on the phone
the entire time?

1136
00:54:19,507 --> 00:54:20,678
Yep.

1137
00:54:20,678 --> 00:54:23,050
Hurts when someone
you care about
ignores you, huh?

1138
00:54:23,050 --> 00:54:24,802
So, why are you
showing me this?

1139
00:54:24,802 --> 00:54:27,515
This isn't me doing
anything wrong.
I'm the victim here!

1140
00:54:27,515 --> 00:54:29,887
No, you're not.
He is.

1141
00:54:34,061 --> 00:54:35,062
Patrick.

1142
00:54:37,485 --> 00:54:38,606
God, he left?

1143
00:54:38,816 --> 00:54:39,987
Guess he doesn't
like threesomes.

1144
00:54:42,450 --> 00:54:44,071
I can't believe I didn't
even notice him leave.

1145
00:54:45,403 --> 00:54:46,664
Wait, why are we
watching this?

1146
00:54:47,164 --> 00:54:50,998
To try and make you
realize that your actions
have consequences.

1147
00:54:51,369 --> 00:54:53,210
If you go on treating
people like this,

1148
00:54:53,501 --> 00:54:55,002
you're going to
end up alone.

1149
00:54:55,002 --> 00:54:57,004
That's what I meant by
changing your ways, Sloane.

1150
00:54:57,214 --> 00:54:59,216
Fine. I'll call everyone
and apologize.

1151
00:54:59,467 --> 00:55:01,419
(LAUGHS)
It's going to take
more than words, Sloane.

1152
00:55:01,799 --> 00:55:07,635
All right. Well,
Caitlin's party is in exactly
33 hours and 10 minutes.

1153
00:55:07,635 --> 00:55:10,307
So, once that's done,
I'll make nice
with everyone, okay?

1154
00:55:10,307 --> 00:55:11,689
Oh! She's going to make
nice with everyone.

1155
00:55:11,689 --> 00:55:12,770
Hmm, imagine that.

1156
00:55:13,731 --> 00:55:14,812
You just don't
get it, do you?

1157
00:55:24,201 --> 00:55:26,534
Hi, Patrick,
it's me again.

1158
00:55:27,204 --> 00:55:30,327
I really
need to talk to you,
so can you call me?

1159
00:55:31,248 --> 00:55:32,249
Bye.

1160
00:55:32,580 --> 00:55:34,251
CAITLIN: Still not
calling you back, huh?

1161
00:55:34,542 --> 00:55:37,955
Some people are
so inconsiderate
these days.

1162
00:55:38,506 --> 00:55:40,718
I feel like I haven't
slept in three days.

1163
00:55:41,338 --> 00:55:44,882
Well, you've been running
around with ghosts all night,
what'd you expect?

1164
00:55:45,222 --> 00:55:46,343
I, on the other hand,

1165
00:55:46,343 --> 00:55:48,345
feel better rested
than I have
in my entire life!

1166
00:55:48,345 --> 00:55:50,518
Hmm. Death'll
do that to you.

1167
00:55:51,308 --> 00:55:52,430
(SIGHS)

1168
00:55:55,643 --> 00:55:57,024
How you doing, babe?

1169
00:55:57,024 --> 00:55:59,026
I'm upset.
I got in a fight
with someone,

1170
00:55:59,026 --> 00:56:01,188
and I'm not sure
how to make things
right with him.

1171
00:56:01,188 --> 00:56:03,320
Well, get him a basket
of pears from Harry and David
or something.

1172
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:06,323
We can't afford to lose
anymore clients
now that Caitlin's gone.

1173
00:56:06,323 --> 00:56:09,577
He's not a client.
He's... (SIGHS)
A guy I knew in college.

1174
00:56:09,907 --> 00:56:11,869
Oh! So no biggie.

1175
00:56:13,581 --> 00:56:15,873
But it is.
He's my friend.

1176
00:56:15,873 --> 00:56:17,755
I think I hurt
his feelings and...

1177
00:56:17,755 --> 00:56:19,917
Babe, I'm, I'm sorry.
I'm really under
the gun here.

1178
00:56:19,917 --> 00:56:21,459
Can we talk
about this later?

1179
00:56:23,050 --> 00:56:25,382
Oh, sure, I guess.

1180
00:56:25,713 --> 00:56:26,884
I'll tell you what.

1181
00:56:29,056 --> 00:56:32,139
Go out and buy yourself
something pretty.
It'll cheer you up.

1182
00:56:34,391 --> 00:56:35,563
Thanks.

1183
00:56:39,226 --> 00:56:41,228
CAITLIN: You guys
are going to have
an awesome marriage.

1184
00:56:41,228 --> 00:56:42,940
Oh, my God.
I am trying, okay?

1185
00:56:42,940 --> 00:56:46,073
I can't fix
a lifetime's worth of
relationships in one day.

1186
00:56:46,073 --> 00:56:47,284
Well, try harder.

1187
00:56:49,366 --> 00:56:51,408
(OVER PHONE)
Hey, Jenny! It's Sloane.

1188
00:56:51,408 --> 00:56:54,121
Hey, sweetie,
I've got my hands full.
Can I call you back?

1189
00:56:54,492 --> 00:56:56,163
I really need
to talk to you.

1190
00:56:56,494 --> 00:56:57,705
What's wrong?
Are you okay?

1191
00:56:58,035 --> 00:56:59,166
Yeah, I just...

1192
00:57:00,377 --> 00:57:01,589
It's just
I've been thinking.

1193
00:57:02,710 --> 00:57:06,423
I know that my work
has been taking up
a lot of my attention lately,

1194
00:57:06,423 --> 00:57:07,885
and I just wanted
to tell you...

1195
00:57:07,885 --> 00:57:09,346
(WHISPERING) 9-1-1!

1196
00:57:09,346 --> 00:57:10,848
I need to call you back.

1197
00:57:11,178 --> 00:57:12,389
Ella, what's wrong?

1198
00:57:12,389 --> 00:57:16,514
I was watching
the DVD of Caitlin's
career retrospective

1199
00:57:16,514 --> 00:57:19,186
and it includes
the COPS episode where
Caitlin got arrested

1200
00:57:19,186 --> 00:57:21,228
for shoplifting
(WHISPERS)
herpes medicine.

1201
00:57:22,149 --> 00:57:24,862
Okay, that whole thing
was so not my fault.

1202
00:57:26,273 --> 00:57:29,697
What? I was gonna pay for it,
but the pharmacy guy
was smoking hot!

1203
00:57:30,327 --> 00:57:32,159
Okay, you want me
to go over there
and be like,

1204
00:57:32,159 --> 00:57:36,203
"Hello, can I buy some
ointment to put out the fire
in my underpants?"

1205
00:57:36,203 --> 00:57:37,414
No! It's humiliating!

1206
00:57:37,875 --> 00:57:40,538
Oh, and there's nothing
embarrassing at all
about stealing it?

1207
00:57:41,078 --> 00:57:42,209
Um...

1208
00:57:44,752 --> 00:57:45,753
Are you sure?

1209
00:57:47,044 --> 00:57:48,846
'Cause I think
it's a little
embarrassing.

1210
00:57:49,757 --> 00:57:53,891
We put a copy
in every gift bag.
All 2,000 of them.

1211
00:57:54,892 --> 00:57:56,473
Oh! I mean, yes.

1212
00:57:56,764 --> 00:57:58,646
You're right.
Get the gift bags
back, right away.

1213
00:57:58,646 --> 00:57:59,687
Got it.

1214
00:58:01,809 --> 00:58:04,732
You know, what I want to know
is why in the world would
someone that good-looking

1215
00:58:04,732 --> 00:58:06,193
become a pharmacist?

1216
00:58:06,193 --> 00:58:08,776
Hey, Jenny!
It's Sloane again.
I'm really sorry.

1217
00:58:08,776 --> 00:58:10,067
Hey! What happened?
Are you okay?

1218
00:58:10,658 --> 00:58:14,491
It's just I'm surrounded
by crazy people here at work

1219
00:58:14,491 --> 00:58:16,113
and they just won't
leave me alone.

1220
00:58:16,113 --> 00:58:17,374
Try being married to Ed!

1221
00:58:17,374 --> 00:58:19,707
Okay, he is so stressed
out, he's acting
like a total lunatic.

1222
00:58:19,707 --> 00:58:23,000
This morning, I literally
caught him talking
to a Cornish game hen.

1223
00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:25,042
(LAUGHS) As long as
the chicken's not
talking back to him.

1224
00:58:25,042 --> 00:58:26,714
(LAUGHING)
Seriously.

1225
00:58:26,714 --> 00:58:29,677
But you know what?
He's going to chill out
once business picks up

1226
00:58:29,677 --> 00:58:32,590
and people start using
those gift certificates
you sent out for us.

1227
00:58:32,930 --> 00:58:36,013
Oh! The gift certificates.

1228
00:58:37,555 --> 00:58:38,686
You didn't send
them out, did you?

1229
00:58:38,686 --> 00:58:39,727
Um...

1230
00:58:39,727 --> 00:58:41,689
Sloane! You promised!

1231
00:58:41,689 --> 00:58:43,350
I know,
and I'm really sorry.

1232
00:58:43,350 --> 00:58:45,142
There's just been so much
going on with work.

1233
00:58:45,142 --> 00:58:46,984
Did you hear?
You got the promotion!

1234
00:58:47,855 --> 00:58:48,856
What?

1235
00:58:49,526 --> 00:58:51,198
Sloane?
Uh, Jenny, I'm sorry.

1236
00:58:51,198 --> 00:58:52,449
I'm gonna have to
call you back again,

1237
00:58:52,449 --> 00:58:54,912
I'm really, really sorry.
But I need... Sloane!

1238
00:58:56,363 --> 00:58:57,494
I got the promotion?

1239
00:58:57,825 --> 00:58:59,747
(CHUCKLING)
Uh-uh! You gotta be
kidding me, right?

1240
00:59:00,457 --> 00:59:01,749
Of course
I'm kidding.

1241
00:59:02,289 --> 00:59:03,621
Why would they
promote you?

1242
00:59:11,669 --> 00:59:13,591
Listen, you little jerk.

1243
00:59:15,052 --> 00:59:18,936
So far today,
I've set up visas
with the state department

1244
00:59:18,936 --> 00:59:21,478
to allow the Vienna Boys Choir
to perform at the premiere.

1245
00:59:21,769 --> 00:59:26,734
I've arranged transpo
and housing for 23 of
Caitlin's childhood friends.

1246
00:59:26,734 --> 00:59:29,687
I just confirmed Lady Gaga
to sing Paparazzi,

1247
00:59:29,687 --> 00:59:31,148
Caitlin's favorite song,

1248
00:59:31,148 --> 00:59:35,362
and I just negotiated
with Elton John to rewrite
Candle in the Wind

1249
00:59:35,362 --> 00:59:36,994
to sing at Caitlin's
graveside.

1250
00:59:37,244 --> 00:59:39,366
I haven't showered,
I haven't slept,

1251
00:59:39,366 --> 00:59:41,699
I've got ex-boyfriends
popping up left and right

1252
00:59:41,699 --> 00:59:44,702
and you want to take out
your prepubescent
insecurities on me,

1253
00:59:44,702 --> 00:59:45,913
to make yourself
feel better?

1254
00:59:50,708 --> 00:59:51,919
It was just a joke.

1255
00:59:51,919 --> 00:59:53,761
I don't have time
for jokes!

1256
00:59:57,214 --> 00:59:58,806
Now, will you
please excuse me.

1257
01:00:00,427 --> 01:00:04,101
Oh! Have a productive day.

1258
01:00:10,277 --> 01:00:12,109
CAITLIN: Well done.
SLOANE: Thank you.

1259
01:00:12,690 --> 01:00:14,031
I've to call Jenny back.

1260
01:00:14,441 --> 01:00:15,532
Yes, you do.

1261
01:00:16,493 --> 01:00:18,826
Jenny! It's me again.

1262
01:00:19,196 --> 01:00:21,949
Oh, hey, Sloane.
Can you hold on
just a second?

1263
01:00:27,705 --> 01:00:28,706
(SIGHS)

1264
01:00:28,916 --> 01:00:30,337
She hung up on me.

1265
01:00:30,668 --> 01:00:31,839
(MIMICS CAT SCREECHING)

1266
01:00:32,089 --> 01:00:35,252
What? Brad was right.
Chick fights are hot.

1267
01:00:36,093 --> 01:00:38,255
Maybe you should
send her a basket
of pears.

1268
01:00:48,315 --> 01:00:49,436
11:30.

1269
01:00:50,027 --> 01:00:51,689
It's almost Christmas,
you know.

1270
01:00:51,859 --> 01:00:53,440
If you want to make
things right with Patrick,

1271
01:00:53,440 --> 01:00:54,732
you kind of
need to do it now.

1272
01:00:56,653 --> 01:00:58,275
Where do you
think I'm going?

1273
01:01:06,543 --> 01:01:07,995
PATRICK: Hey, man.

1274
01:01:07,995 --> 01:01:11,548
It is really, really late,
and you need some sleep
so Santa can come.

1275
01:01:11,548 --> 01:01:12,629
All right?

1276
01:01:15,462 --> 01:01:16,794
Did you hear that?

1277
01:01:16,794 --> 01:01:18,595
I think I just heard
reindeer on the rooftop.

1278
01:01:19,346 --> 01:01:21,969
Close your eyes. Come on.
Gotta get some sleep.

1279
01:01:23,801 --> 01:01:25,723
(CHUCKLES)
Goodnight, buddy.

1280
01:01:31,308 --> 01:01:32,609
Patrick? Uh...

1281
01:01:33,731 --> 01:01:34,812
Patrick! Wait!

1282
01:01:35,112 --> 01:01:36,273
What?

1283
01:01:36,273 --> 01:01:39,156
I wanted to
explain to you
about last night.

1284
01:01:39,156 --> 01:01:40,697
No, that's okay,
I understand.

1285
01:01:40,697 --> 01:01:42,579
I mean, what,
we've been apart
for years.

1286
01:01:42,579 --> 01:01:44,872
It would be silly for me
to think that you hadn't
met somebody else

1287
01:01:44,872 --> 01:01:46,533
in all this time,
but what I don't
understand

1288
01:01:46,533 --> 01:01:48,415
is why you felt
the need to flaunt it
in front of me.

1289
01:01:48,415 --> 01:01:49,747
Flaunt it?

1290
01:01:49,747 --> 01:01:50,918
What do you mean?

1291
01:01:50,918 --> 01:01:52,329
We were on a date.

1292
01:01:52,669 --> 01:01:56,003
And you left in the middle
of that date to get...
Oh, what was that? Engaged!

1293
01:01:57,504 --> 01:01:59,006
What kind of a person
does that?

1294
01:01:59,006 --> 01:02:00,097
Look, you don't
understand.

1295
01:02:00,097 --> 01:02:02,299
I thought that Andrew
and I had broken up.

1296
01:02:02,549 --> 01:02:04,511
He cheated on me,
see, so I called you...

1297
01:02:04,511 --> 01:02:05,642
To get back at him?

1298
01:02:08,265 --> 01:02:09,396
Kind of.

1299
01:02:10,107 --> 01:02:11,268
Who are you?

1300
01:02:12,309 --> 01:02:13,560
Excuse me?
Who are you?

1301
01:02:15,022 --> 01:02:18,195
I'm me, Sloane, the same
girl that you fell in love
with in college.

1302
01:02:19,316 --> 01:02:22,529
No, no,
you see, that Sloane,
she was warm and funny

1303
01:02:22,529 --> 01:02:24,741
and she cared
a lot about people.

1304
01:02:24,992 --> 01:02:26,203
You're nothing like her.

1305
01:02:28,165 --> 01:02:29,746
I can never fall in love
with a girl like you now.

1306
01:02:32,749 --> 01:02:34,962
That's a terrible
thing to say.

1307
01:02:35,292 --> 01:02:36,373
Yeah, well.

1308
01:02:38,505 --> 01:02:39,797
The truth hurts.

1309
01:02:46,723 --> 01:02:48,185
Wait.
Where are you going?

1310
01:02:48,185 --> 01:02:49,226
Home.

1311
01:02:49,226 --> 01:02:51,388
You're not going to go
straighten things out
with Patrick?

1312
01:02:51,388 --> 01:02:53,600
No. He made it
clear how he feels.

1313
01:02:53,600 --> 01:02:55,692
If he changes his mind,
he knows where to find me.

1314
01:02:55,692 --> 01:02:57,104
Sloane, he was just mad.

1315
01:02:57,694 --> 01:02:59,106
I'm sure
if you talk to him,

1316
01:02:59,106 --> 01:03:01,698
he'll know that you're not
as horrible a person
as you seem.

1317
01:03:01,698 --> 01:03:02,779
Thank you.

1318
01:03:02,779 --> 01:03:04,321
Come on, you know
what I mean.

1319
01:03:04,902 --> 01:03:07,454
Look, you have
to go back there
and apologize to Patrick.

1320
01:03:07,454 --> 01:03:10,908
Only thing I need to do
is go over the invites for
the final list for the party.

1321
01:03:10,908 --> 01:03:12,039
Seriously?

1322
01:03:12,709 --> 01:03:14,872
After all that,
you're still putting
work first?

1323
01:03:15,332 --> 01:03:16,623
It's all I have left.

1324
01:03:16,964 --> 01:03:18,465
Merry Christmas...

1325
01:03:21,258 --> 01:03:22,379
Sloane.

1326
01:03:23,550 --> 01:03:24,721
Midnight.

1327
01:03:25,262 --> 01:03:27,885
You? You mean,
you're the Ghost
of Ex-mas Yet To Come?

1328
01:03:29,556 --> 01:03:32,729
Really?
'Cause I'm pretty sure
I never banged Santa.

1329
01:03:34,021 --> 01:03:36,854
(LAUGHING)
Actually, that sounds like
something Caitlin would do.

1330
01:03:38,105 --> 01:03:39,276
Where did she go?

1331
01:03:39,566 --> 01:03:40,938
She can't come
on this one.

1332
01:03:41,528 --> 01:03:43,200
Her future ended
the moment she died.

1333
01:03:43,200 --> 01:03:45,492
But she will be there
when I wake from this,
in the morning.

1334
01:03:47,324 --> 01:03:48,405
What? Why not?

1335
01:03:48,906 --> 01:03:50,077
She's gone.

1336
01:03:52,039 --> 01:03:53,951
But she can't be
gone for good. I...

1337
01:03:55,042 --> 01:03:56,163
I'm not ready.

1338
01:03:56,163 --> 01:03:59,216
You do realize that
Caitlin is dead, right?

1339
01:04:00,167 --> 01:04:02,669
Whether she leaves
now or later,
she is gone forever.

1340
01:04:02,960 --> 01:04:04,551
But I never got
to say goodbye.

1341
01:04:04,551 --> 01:04:07,424
Well, you had plenty
of chances. You just
wasted them all.

1342
01:04:08,926 --> 01:04:10,387
Well, aren't you jolly!

1343
01:04:11,428 --> 01:04:13,891
It is time to go see what
your future holds, Sloane.

1344
01:04:14,521 --> 01:04:16,233
No, I really don't have
the time for this.

1345
01:04:16,233 --> 01:04:18,605
I'm afraid you don't
have much time left,
period.

1346
01:04:18,896 --> 01:04:20,817
It is now officially
Christmas Day.

1347
01:04:21,318 --> 01:04:23,400
Your future is
about to be sealed,

1348
01:04:23,400 --> 01:04:25,983
and once it is,
you can't change it.

1349
01:04:32,199 --> 01:04:33,370
Let's go.

1350
01:04:34,701 --> 01:04:35,872
(MOCKING)
Let's go.

1351
01:04:39,706 --> 01:04:41,498
Okay,
I'm heading out now.

1352
01:04:42,049 --> 01:04:45,342
Are you sure you wouldn't
like to come join my family
for Christmas dinner?

1353
01:04:45,552 --> 01:04:47,384
I hate the thought
of leaving you here
all alone.

1354
01:04:48,135 --> 01:04:50,767
I won't be alone.
I'm spending Christmas
with my daughter.

1355
01:04:51,268 --> 01:04:53,140
But she couldn't
come visit this year.
Remember?

1356
01:04:53,390 --> 01:04:56,143
What are you
talking about?
Sloane is right here.

1357
01:04:56,143 --> 01:04:58,515
Sloane? Sloane?
Where are you?

1358
01:04:59,316 --> 01:05:03,020
Where is she?
Where's my daughter?
Sloane? Sloane!

1359
01:05:05,232 --> 01:05:06,863
Oh! There she is!

1360
01:05:06,863 --> 01:05:07,945
(LAUGHING)

1361
01:05:10,617 --> 01:05:13,200
Bad girl! Bad girl.

1362
01:05:13,870 --> 01:05:15,872
Wandering away
from Mommy!

1363
01:05:16,663 --> 01:05:19,206
See? We always spend
Christmas together.

1364
01:05:21,458 --> 01:05:22,799
Merry Christmas, Vivian.

1365
01:05:24,381 --> 01:05:28,045
Merry Christmas!
Say Merry Christmas, Sloane!

1366
01:05:28,215 --> 01:05:29,426
Merry Christmas.

1367
01:05:29,967 --> 01:05:32,349
SLOANE: Holy crap.
She's gone insane!

1368
01:05:32,679 --> 01:05:34,051
SANTA: No, she hasn't.

1369
01:05:34,391 --> 01:05:36,393
She thinks
that dog is me.

1370
01:05:37,014 --> 01:05:40,017
I mean,
she always referred
to them as my brothers,

1371
01:05:40,017 --> 01:05:43,190
but as far as I knew,
she understood that
I'm a human being.

1372
01:05:43,190 --> 01:05:45,192
If she's not crazy,
then what is she?

1373
01:05:45,402 --> 01:05:46,523
Lonely.

1374
01:05:46,523 --> 01:05:48,615
That's my little girl.

1375
01:05:48,615 --> 01:05:50,367
Oh, you had me
so worried.

1376
01:05:50,697 --> 01:05:52,699
Never leave Mommy. Never.

1377
01:05:53,240 --> 01:05:54,871
SANTA: After her
fifth husband...

1378
01:05:54,871 --> 01:05:56,333
SLOANE: Larry's
her fourth husband.

1379
01:05:56,623 --> 01:05:59,376
I know.
Carlos is her fifth.

1380
01:05:59,376 --> 01:06:02,919
And after he moves out,
she will fall apart.

1381
01:06:02,919 --> 01:06:05,712
And since you certainly
can't be bothered
with caring for her,

1382
01:06:05,712 --> 01:06:07,464
she becomes obsessed
with dogs,

1383
01:06:07,464 --> 01:06:10,387
whom she knows
love her unconditionally.

1384
01:06:10,387 --> 01:06:12,139
Okay, this is ridiculous.

1385
01:06:12,139 --> 01:06:15,302
And you sound
like an idiot speaking
in the future tense.

1386
01:06:15,552 --> 01:06:17,144
That's because
it's your future.

1387
01:06:17,514 --> 01:06:18,765
Come on.

1388
01:06:19,596 --> 01:06:23,690
VIVIAN: Oh,
you had me so worried.
Never leave Mommy. Never.

1389
01:06:33,110 --> 01:06:34,281
Hey.
Hey.

1390
01:06:35,782 --> 01:06:38,035
Good lord,
what's she wearing?

1391
01:06:38,035 --> 01:06:39,746
When the restaurant
went out of business,

1392
01:06:39,746 --> 01:06:43,620
the only job she could find
was waiting tables
at the local Applebee's.

1393
01:06:43,620 --> 01:06:46,923
Oh, okay, I refuse
to take the blame
for that.

1394
01:06:47,584 --> 01:06:49,586
Sloane sent us a card.
Want to see it?

1395
01:06:50,387 --> 01:06:51,508
No.

1396
01:06:54,091 --> 01:06:55,682
Okay, that was harsh.

1397
01:06:56,433 --> 01:06:58,014
We're supposed to
be friends.

1398
01:06:58,014 --> 01:06:59,726
But you never
acted like one.

1399
01:07:00,016 --> 01:07:02,689
Jenny got tired
of always being
rejected by you,

1400
01:07:03,270 --> 01:07:04,851
so she just gave up.

1401
01:07:05,352 --> 01:07:07,904
Sooner or later,
everyone does.

1402
01:07:11,908 --> 01:07:14,241
Oh, we're visiting
Patrick now?

1403
01:07:14,241 --> 01:07:17,154
Awesome. I can't wait
to see how he's stopped
caring about me now, too.

1404
01:07:17,494 --> 01:07:19,156
No, we're not going
to visit Patrick.

1405
01:07:19,156 --> 01:07:21,578
Actually,
after you walked
away from him tonight,

1406
01:07:21,578 --> 01:07:22,869
you will never
see him again.

1407
01:07:23,500 --> 01:07:25,122
But I thought you said
he still loves me.

1408
01:07:25,122 --> 01:07:29,045
He does.
But you don't care
about love anymore.

1409
01:07:29,045 --> 01:07:30,046
Do you?

1410
01:07:30,427 --> 01:07:34,131
Okay, screw you, Santa!
Of course I care about love.
I'm engaged.

1411
01:07:34,131 --> 01:07:35,472
So that means
that you're lying.

1412
01:07:35,472 --> 01:07:38,305
And if you guys are my exes,
and I'm getting married
to Andrew,

1413
01:07:38,305 --> 01:07:41,098
then I'm not going to
have a future ex-boyfriend.

1414
01:07:41,098 --> 01:07:42,349
(LAUGHING)

1415
01:07:45,102 --> 01:07:47,023
Wrong again.

1416
01:08:01,498 --> 01:08:03,660
How can you be my ex?
I thought we get married.

1417
01:08:04,000 --> 01:08:05,702
Yes, we do.
We also get divorced.

1418
01:08:06,042 --> 01:08:07,043
What? Why?

1419
01:08:07,414 --> 01:08:08,705
Well, we wanted
different things.

1420
01:08:08,705 --> 01:08:11,047
You wanted power
and prestige.
And I wanted...

1421
01:08:11,838 --> 01:08:12,879
The blonde.

1422
01:08:14,921 --> 01:08:18,475
Oh, can the theatrics.
In the end, we both got
exactly what we wanted.

1423
01:08:18,475 --> 01:08:19,596
What do you mean?

1424
01:08:19,596 --> 01:08:21,428
You take half my assets
in the divorce.

1425
01:08:21,768 --> 01:08:24,931
Half my clients,
half my company.
You're set for life.

1426
01:08:25,722 --> 01:08:26,853
Come on,
I'll show you.

1427
01:08:28,104 --> 01:08:30,727
You can afford
the best of everything.

1428
01:08:39,866 --> 01:08:41,077
WOMAN: Much better. Yes.

1429
01:08:41,077 --> 01:08:42,449
(ALL CHATTERING)

1430
01:08:44,241 --> 01:08:45,832
SLOANE:
If we're not here
to see Patrick,

1431
01:08:45,832 --> 01:08:47,043
then what are
we doing here?

1432
01:08:47,043 --> 01:08:48,335
Where are we going?

1433
01:08:48,665 --> 01:08:52,169
To see what all of
your money and promotions
and power got you.

1434
01:08:59,966 --> 01:09:02,559
Is that...
Is that me?

1435
01:09:04,761 --> 01:09:05,762
It is.

1436
01:09:09,266 --> 01:09:10,727
But I look so young.

1437
01:09:13,270 --> 01:09:17,113
Where are my flowers?
Where are my visitors?
Why...

1438
01:09:18,575 --> 01:09:19,906
Why am I all alone?

1439
01:09:20,407 --> 01:09:22,659
Because this is the way
you've chosen to live.

1440
01:09:23,119 --> 01:09:25,412
No, no.
I didn't choose this.

1441
01:09:25,872 --> 01:09:27,744
I never chose
to be alone.

1442
01:09:27,744 --> 01:09:29,085
But this is
what you got.

1443
01:09:29,916 --> 01:09:32,499
All of your wealth,
success...

1444
01:09:32,499 --> 01:09:33,710
(SNIFFLING)

1445
01:09:33,710 --> 01:09:34,961
It comes to nothing.

1446
01:09:35,252 --> 01:09:37,294
It doesn't have to
happen like this.

1447
01:09:37,294 --> 01:09:38,675
I'll change.

1448
01:09:39,426 --> 01:09:40,927
It's too late, Sloane.

1449
01:09:40,927 --> 01:09:45,472
No! I can fix this!
It hasn't happened yet!

1450
01:09:46,353 --> 01:09:47,394
It's too late.

1451
01:09:50,477 --> 01:09:52,229
You've already
made your choice.

1452
01:09:52,689 --> 01:09:54,231
That ring is
on your finger.

1453
01:09:54,441 --> 01:09:56,523
Patrick's heart
is already broken.

1454
01:09:56,523 --> 01:09:58,074
Caitlin is in the ground.

1455
01:09:58,735 --> 01:10:00,987
Christmas is over.

1456
01:10:00,987 --> 01:10:03,410
Please! Please don't
let this happen to me!

1457
01:10:24,100 --> 01:10:25,342
(RINGING)

1458
01:10:37,444 --> 01:10:39,736
Caitlin?
Where are you?

1459
01:10:40,567 --> 01:10:41,818
Caitlin!

1460
01:10:42,068 --> 01:10:43,280
God, why are you
shouting?

1461
01:10:43,530 --> 01:10:46,743
(SIGHING)
I thought for sure
you would be gone.

1462
01:10:47,494 --> 01:10:49,125
No. The future's not
quite here yet.

1463
01:10:49,416 --> 01:10:50,497
What day is it?

1464
01:10:50,497 --> 01:10:52,499
It's Christmas.
Morning.

1465
01:10:52,499 --> 01:10:53,580
It's not too late?

1466
01:10:54,250 --> 01:10:55,632
(GASPING)

1467
01:10:55,632 --> 01:10:57,334
I'm not too late?
I can fix things?

1468
01:10:57,584 --> 01:10:59,376
Yes, but you
have to hurry.

1469
01:10:59,796 --> 01:11:00,837
Right.

1470
01:11:02,258 --> 01:11:04,180
No, Sloane,
where are you going?

1471
01:11:04,180 --> 01:11:05,261
The party's this way.

1472
01:11:10,477 --> 01:11:13,099
Sloane, come on!
We cannot be late
for my party!

1473
01:11:13,099 --> 01:11:14,771
I know, I know.
I gotta find something.

1474
01:11:14,771 --> 01:11:16,653
It's really,
really important!

1475
01:11:16,653 --> 01:11:19,486
More important
than my party?
I don't think so.

1476
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:25,782
Sloane!
This is my night.
It's all about me.

1477
01:11:28,745 --> 01:11:30,036
Is that it?

1478
01:11:30,036 --> 01:11:32,369
This is it.
Okay. Let's go!

1479
01:11:33,330 --> 01:11:35,752
SLOANE: Hey, Andrew,
I need to get a couple
of things done

1480
01:11:35,752 --> 01:11:37,914
before the party,
so I'll just meet you
there, okay? Bye.

1481
01:11:42,008 --> 01:11:43,179
Does dinner come
with a show?

1482
01:11:43,800 --> 01:11:45,382
(CAR HONKING)

1483
01:11:46,593 --> 01:11:47,724
Merry Christmas!

1484
01:11:48,845 --> 01:11:50,056
(SCOFFS)

1485
01:11:50,056 --> 01:11:51,097
Hey!

1486
01:11:51,097 --> 01:11:52,349
(CAR HORNS BLARING)

1487
01:11:52,349 --> 01:11:53,480
Happy Holidays!

1488
01:11:55,311 --> 01:11:56,483
(PEOPLE HOOTING)

1489
01:11:58,565 --> 01:12:00,607
(PIANO PLAYING CAROLS)

1490
01:12:09,155 --> 01:12:10,497
You didn't get
a second puppy?

1491
01:12:11,618 --> 01:12:15,752
The breeder didn't have
any males, and Schatzi
wants a little brother.

1492
01:12:16,413 --> 01:12:17,914
How did you know
about that?

1493
01:12:17,914 --> 01:12:20,216
(LAUGHS)
It doesn't matter.

1494
01:12:20,837 --> 01:12:22,549
All that matters
is that I'm here.

1495
01:12:23,380 --> 01:12:25,422
I didn't think
I'd see you today.

1496
01:12:25,922 --> 01:12:27,424
Of course
I'd come see you.

1497
01:12:27,424 --> 01:12:29,596
It's Christmas,
we should spend it
together.

1498
01:12:30,847 --> 01:12:32,228
I love you, Mom.

1499
01:12:32,228 --> 01:12:33,520
Huh.

1500
01:12:33,890 --> 01:12:35,642
Well, I love
you too, sweetie.

1501
01:12:36,102 --> 01:12:37,734
Okay, now get
yourself together,

1502
01:12:37,734 --> 01:12:39,235
'cause we are
going to a party!

1503
01:12:39,235 --> 01:12:42,068
(LAUGHS) Oh!
Can I bring your
little brother?

1504
01:12:42,068 --> 01:12:44,070
(SIGHING) Oh, Mom,
don't call him that.

1505
01:12:44,481 --> 01:12:45,822
But, yes, you can.

1506
01:12:46,072 --> 01:12:47,153
(GIGGLING)

1507
01:12:47,153 --> 01:12:49,075
Your sister's taking
us to a party.

1508
01:12:50,657 --> 01:12:53,079
(GASPING)
I knew you'd come!
I knew it!

1509
01:12:54,621 --> 01:12:56,122
Thank you for not
giving up on me.

1510
01:12:56,493 --> 01:12:57,624
Never!

1511
01:12:57,624 --> 01:12:59,085
And you brought
your mom!

1512
01:12:59,916 --> 01:13:02,208
I hope you don't mind
me showing up without
an invitation.

1513
01:13:02,208 --> 01:13:04,090
The more the merrier!
Get your butt in here.

1514
01:13:04,090 --> 01:13:05,211
(LAUGHING)

1515
01:13:06,302 --> 01:13:07,464
I thought you had
to work today.

1516
01:13:07,464 --> 01:13:10,096
I do. Uh, but I just
wanted to swing by
here first.

1517
01:13:11,097 --> 01:13:12,679
To drop off your mom.

1518
01:13:14,561 --> 01:13:17,353
And to apologize
for the way that
I've treated you.

1519
01:13:18,224 --> 01:13:20,316
I've been losing
a lot of friends lately,

1520
01:13:20,316 --> 01:13:23,019
and I couldn't stand
if I lost you, too.

1521
01:13:23,980 --> 01:13:26,402
Never. You're not
getting rid of me
that easily.

1522
01:13:28,074 --> 01:13:29,576
Okay, I'm going to be
back as soon as I can.

1523
01:13:29,576 --> 01:13:31,578
I just need to go
take care of your
Christmas present.

1524
01:13:31,788 --> 01:13:34,741
But you already got me
that sweet baseball cap.

1525
01:13:34,741 --> 01:13:35,992
(GIGGLES)

1526
01:13:35,992 --> 01:13:37,243
Your real present.

1527
01:13:37,664 --> 01:13:39,085
You're thinking
what I'm thinking?

1528
01:13:39,085 --> 01:13:40,166
I am.

1529
01:13:44,300 --> 01:13:45,882
(CLEARING THROAT) Yeah.

1530
01:13:45,882 --> 01:13:48,094
I will see you later.
Okay, bye.

1531
01:13:48,094 --> 01:13:49,596
Okay. Hurry back!

1532
01:14:02,939 --> 01:14:03,940
Hello.

1533
01:14:04,440 --> 01:14:06,232
Hey! What are you
doing here?

1534
01:14:07,023 --> 01:14:09,696
You told me
we were working today.

1535
01:14:09,696 --> 01:14:10,907
No, no.
You know what?

1536
01:14:10,907 --> 01:14:12,408
Take the rest
of the day off.

1537
01:14:12,699 --> 01:14:14,571
Really?
Yeah, it's Christmas.

1538
01:14:14,571 --> 01:14:16,072
Go home and be
with your daughter.

1539
01:14:16,072 --> 01:14:17,243
Son. Max.

1540
01:14:18,074 --> 01:14:20,246
Sorry! (LAUGHS)
I'll see you on Monday.

1541
01:14:22,418 --> 01:14:25,882
(WHISPERING) We already
pulled all the incriminating
DVDs of Caitlin.

1542
01:14:26,212 --> 01:14:27,924
Oh, good.
Then there'll be
space for these.

1543
01:14:28,254 --> 01:14:31,678
Hey, I need you
to put one of these
in every single gift bag.

1544
01:14:31,678 --> 01:14:33,009
It's very important.
Okay.

1545
01:14:34,971 --> 01:14:36,092
What are those?

1546
01:14:36,092 --> 01:14:37,393
Oh, gift certificates.

1547
01:14:37,393 --> 01:14:39,686
Just trying to help
a friend's new
restaurant take off.

1548
01:14:39,686 --> 01:14:41,598
We'll have every
celebrity in town
in there

1549
01:14:41,598 --> 01:14:42,809
and that ought
to do it.

1550
01:14:42,809 --> 01:14:45,021
That's really
nice of you.

1551
01:14:46,192 --> 01:14:47,944
Wow, you just
called me nice.

1552
01:14:48,565 --> 01:14:49,906
That's never
happened before.

1553
01:14:52,318 --> 01:14:53,409
Can I still go home?

1554
01:14:54,320 --> 01:14:57,453
Of course.
Merry Christmas! Go!

1555
01:15:00,166 --> 01:15:03,329
Sloane! You gotta admit,
the camera loves me.

1556
01:15:10,757 --> 01:15:13,339
You think
Caitlin's somewhere,
watching all of this?

1557
01:15:14,631 --> 01:15:16,633
(SIGHING)
Oh, yeah.
Definitely.

1558
01:15:16,633 --> 01:15:18,264
And I think
she's loving it.

1559
01:15:30,987 --> 01:15:32,318
(PEOPLE CHEERING)

1560
01:15:33,950 --> 01:15:36,703
I'm coming to you
live from the red carpet

1561
01:15:36,703 --> 01:15:38,414
at the Snow Angel
premiere party,

1562
01:15:38,414 --> 01:15:41,918
where all of Hollywood
has turned out
in all its glamour

1563
01:15:41,918 --> 01:15:44,370
to honor the memory
of one of their own.

1564
01:15:44,370 --> 01:15:47,624
It is a moving tribute
to a fallen star.

1565
01:15:47,924 --> 01:15:49,165
But don't you dare
touch that remote

1566
01:15:49,165 --> 01:15:51,257
because we've got
this beautiful life,

1567
01:15:51,257 --> 01:15:52,929
cut way too short,

1568
01:15:53,169 --> 01:15:57,053
covered from every
imaginable angle,
right here on SHOWBIZ.

1569
01:15:57,053 --> 01:15:59,305
Whoo! It's going
to be a fun night.

1570
01:16:27,754 --> 01:16:29,125
There you are!

1571
01:16:29,465 --> 01:16:30,757
I need
to talk to you.

1572
01:16:30,757 --> 01:16:32,338
And I need
to talk to you,

1573
01:16:32,919 --> 01:16:34,050
Ms. Vice President!

1574
01:16:36,262 --> 01:16:38,094
Oh, you mean
I got the promotion?

1575
01:16:38,094 --> 01:16:39,595
I just got word
from my dad.

1576
01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:43,139
Oh, my God!
(GASPING)
That is amazing!

1577
01:16:43,139 --> 01:16:44,480
Congratulations.

1578
01:16:45,642 --> 01:16:50,066
Uh, but that...
It's gonna make
this even harder.

1579
01:16:50,566 --> 01:16:51,728
What?

1580
01:16:51,728 --> 01:16:53,690
Oh, God, uh,
how do I say this?

1581
01:16:54,490 --> 01:16:56,402
Uh, my whole life,

1582
01:16:56,863 --> 01:16:58,614
I was taught
that relationships
are based

1583
01:16:58,614 --> 01:17:00,947
on what
the other person
can do for you.

1584
01:17:00,947 --> 01:17:02,078
Right.

1585
01:17:02,078 --> 01:17:05,702
Financially,
emotionally,
or in your career.

1586
01:17:05,702 --> 01:17:06,743
Mmm-hmm.

1587
01:17:06,743 --> 01:17:08,294
But I realize
how wrong that is.

1588
01:17:09,245 --> 01:17:11,587
It's not about
what someone
can do for you,

1589
01:17:12,709 --> 01:17:15,051
it's about how they
make you feel when
you're with them,

1590
01:17:15,922 --> 01:17:17,133
or how you both feel.

1591
01:17:17,133 --> 01:17:18,254
Absolutely.

1592
01:17:18,514 --> 01:17:20,216
I don't want to feel
like an accessory.

1593
01:17:20,757 --> 01:17:21,928
I don't blame you.

1594
01:17:23,099 --> 01:17:25,972
I need someone
that can be there
for me emotionally,

1595
01:17:26,392 --> 01:17:30,396
that listens to me
and loves me the way
that I love him.

1596
01:17:33,149 --> 01:17:35,902
Andrew? Andrew!

1597
01:17:41,157 --> 01:17:42,238
Andrew!

1598
01:17:42,238 --> 01:17:43,489
Yeah, babe.

1599
01:17:46,743 --> 01:17:47,874
Of course.

1600
01:17:49,996 --> 01:17:51,127
I'm sorry.

1601
01:17:51,127 --> 01:17:52,418
Oh, come on, Sloane.

1602
01:17:52,418 --> 01:17:53,549
Mmm-mmm.

1603
01:17:58,254 --> 01:18:00,556
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

1604
01:18:03,139 --> 01:18:04,220
(GASPS)

1605
01:18:04,220 --> 01:18:05,932
(CAITLIN GIGGLING)

1606
01:18:07,764 --> 01:18:10,226
I couldn't resist.
Once more for
old times' sake.

1607
01:18:11,607 --> 01:18:13,479
So, mission
accomplished, huh?

1608
01:18:14,570 --> 01:18:15,732
Did you get
your wings?

1609
01:18:16,442 --> 01:18:17,984
Actually, it's more
like a pitchfork.

1610
01:18:18,614 --> 01:18:20,656
No!
(LAUGHS) I'm kidding.

1611
01:18:20,656 --> 01:18:22,118
Yes, I'm all set.

1612
01:18:24,580 --> 01:18:27,083
So, then I guess
this is goodbye?

1613
01:18:32,088 --> 01:18:33,539
And you're gonna
be okay?

1614
01:18:33,539 --> 01:18:35,381
You kidding?
Heaven has an open bar!

1615
01:18:36,252 --> 01:18:38,294
And Heath Ledger
and James Dean...

1616
01:18:38,594 --> 01:18:40,256
Yeah, sounds like
heaven to me.

1617
01:18:43,049 --> 01:18:44,931
You know, I think
that you're going to
find a guy down here

1618
01:18:45,221 --> 01:18:46,763
who's almost as perfect.

1619
01:18:50,847 --> 01:18:53,609
Well, um,
I guess I'll be off.

1620
01:18:56,562 --> 01:19:00,406
Sloane, thank you
for everything.

1621
01:19:01,988 --> 01:19:03,910
No, I should
be thanking you.

1622
01:19:04,570 --> 01:19:06,072
You gave me
a whole new life.

1623
01:19:07,073 --> 01:19:08,915
Well, goodbye.

1624
01:19:10,917 --> 01:19:11,958
Bye.

1625
01:19:30,266 --> 01:19:31,597
(ALL CHEERING)

1626
01:20:37,583 --> 01:20:38,875
Excuse me.

1627
01:20:39,215 --> 01:20:43,089
I heard about the promotion
and I just wanted to say

1628
01:20:43,089 --> 01:20:45,591
there's no freaking way
I'm bringing you coffee.

1629
01:20:45,591 --> 01:20:47,093
(GIGGLES)
Ever.

1630
01:20:47,093 --> 01:20:48,925
How about tea?

1631
01:20:49,765 --> 01:20:51,097
Deal.

1632
01:20:51,847 --> 01:20:53,930
I'm out of here.

1633
01:20:53,930 --> 01:20:57,143
Wait. You're leaving?
Where are you going?

1634
01:20:57,733 --> 01:20:59,235
To get a life.

1635
01:21:11,447 --> 01:21:12,448
Patrick.

1636
01:21:21,547 --> 01:21:25,761
Patrick, um...
I'm so sorry.

1637
01:21:26,212 --> 01:21:27,383
For what?

1638
01:21:27,593 --> 01:21:29,425
For everything.

1639
01:21:30,506 --> 01:21:33,309
For what I said
at the hospital,

1640
01:21:33,309 --> 01:21:35,641
for letting you
leave the restaurant
when Andrew showed up,

1641
01:21:37,183 --> 01:21:42,438
for running away
instead of taking
your ring

1642
01:21:44,280 --> 01:21:45,521
and becoming your wife.

1643
01:21:49,735 --> 01:21:50,987
How do you know
about that?

1644
01:21:51,527 --> 01:21:53,909
I... I just know.

1645
01:21:56,292 --> 01:22:00,746
Most of all,
I'm sorry that it has
taken me until now

1646
01:22:00,746 --> 01:22:03,379
to realize
how I feel about you,

1647
01:22:05,421 --> 01:22:07,753
when, inside,
I've known it
all along.

1648
01:22:11,347 --> 01:22:15,761
I'm not that horrible
girl that you saw
at the restaurant,

1649
01:22:16,762 --> 01:22:18,644
at least, not anymore.

1650
01:22:20,516 --> 01:22:25,191
I'm me, the Sloane
you knew in college,

1651
01:22:25,731 --> 01:22:30,116
and I would love the chance
to reintroduce you to her.

1652
01:22:34,740 --> 01:22:37,743
She used to look
something like this.

1653
01:22:46,422 --> 01:22:47,963
Oh, my God.

1654
01:22:49,255 --> 01:22:51,507
I can't believe
that you kept this
all these years.

1655
01:22:52,048 --> 01:22:53,639
Of course I did.

1656
01:22:54,760 --> 01:22:56,762
It's a present
from the man
that I love.

1657
01:23:04,150 --> 01:23:05,271
(CHUCKLES)

1658
01:23:33,049 --> 01:23:34,590
Merry Christmas, babe.

1659
01:23:34,590 --> 01:23:36,132
Thank you.

1660
01:23:36,892 --> 01:23:38,184
Hey, Vivian.

1661
01:23:38,514 --> 01:23:40,186
Oh, my darling,
you look so good.

1662
01:23:40,186 --> 01:23:41,597
You look beautiful.
Haven't changed a bit.

1663
01:23:42,438 --> 01:23:44,230
I'm so glad
you're here.

1664
01:23:44,230 --> 01:23:45,521
Me, too.

1665
01:23:46,812 --> 01:23:48,144
VIVIAN:
Get back over there.
Get back over there.

1666
01:23:48,144 --> 01:23:49,355
You got her, now,
don't lose her.

1667
01:23:49,565 --> 01:23:50,816
(EXCLAIMS)
I'm going, I'm going!

1668
01:23:51,447 --> 01:23:53,149
(LAUGHING)

1669
01:23:53,149 --> 01:23:55,321
Did I ever tell you
the story about
my three marriages?

1670
01:23:55,321 --> 01:23:58,494
My first husband,
he was tall,
and I was in love.

1671
01:23:58,494 --> 01:24:00,746
My second husband,
he was short,
but he was rich.

1672
01:24:00,746 --> 01:24:02,368
And my third husband,
well, who knows,

1673
01:24:02,368 --> 01:24:04,080
he might be
under the table
right now.

1674
01:24:04,080 --> 01:24:05,581
(LAUGHING)

1675
01:24:05,581 --> 01:24:07,002
Are you married?

1676
01:24:07,002 --> 01:24:08,294
(ALL LAUGHING)

1677
01:24:11,377 --> 01:24:13,089
Merry Ex-mas, Caitlin.

1678
01:24:17,383 --> 01:24:19,225
Merry Christmas,
everyone.

1679
01:24:19,725 --> 01:24:21,347
ALL: Merry Christmas.