1 00:00:12,573 --> 00:00:16,213 Alright. The options for this month's game night are: 2 00:00:16,393 --> 00:00:20,172 checkers, cards, Double Dutch, Tiddly Winks and-- 3 00:00:21,142 --> 00:00:23,752 "My Mom" isn't a game, Muscle Man. 4 00:00:23,842 --> 00:00:25,072 That doesn't even make sense. 5 00:00:25,122 --> 00:00:27,292 Looks like I win! 6 00:00:27,851 --> 00:00:30,161 Let's play Ball-bo Catcher! 7 00:00:32,001 --> 00:00:33,601 A crossword puzzle? 8 00:00:33,691 --> 00:00:35,221 Okay, let's vote. 9 00:00:37,021 --> 00:00:38,450 Yes, Mordecai? 10 00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:39,650 Oh, nothing. 11 00:00:39,770 --> 00:00:41,540 Do you have a better idea? 12 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:44,840 We could play one of those stale old games we usually play. 13 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:49,000 Or we could play the sci-fi fantasy epic of the century! 14 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:52,119 Behold, The Realm of Darthon! 15 00:00:54,279 --> 00:00:55,479 So, what is it? 16 00:00:55,479 --> 00:00:56,859 It's a role-playing game. 17 00:00:56,859 --> 00:00:59,229 We make up an adventure and you guys try to beat it. 18 00:00:59,229 --> 00:01:01,028 You can use magic and stuff! 19 00:01:01,028 --> 00:01:04,008 A game of imagination? What fun! 20 00:01:04,048 --> 00:01:05,268 Sounds lame. 21 00:01:05,268 --> 00:01:06,328 No way! 22 00:01:06,328 --> 00:01:09,098 The guy at the store told us it's the hottest RPG of the year! 23 00:01:10,068 --> 00:01:11,527 All in favor? 24 00:01:11,627 --> 00:01:14,007 - Yeah, yeah! - I guess. 25 00:01:14,947 --> 00:01:16,727 Darthon! Darthon! 26 00:01:18,017 --> 00:01:20,317 Get ready for the best game night of your life! 27 00:01:20,797 --> 00:01:24,666 Your party walks down a long hallway and reaches a locked door. 28 00:01:24,666 --> 00:01:25,986 What do you do? 29 00:01:26,156 --> 00:01:28,846 I smash it open with my war claw! 30 00:01:28,896 --> 00:01:32,286 Then, a bunch of ladies come out, and they're all, 31 00:01:32,306 --> 00:01:37,335 "Ooh Muscle Man, quit pinching my butt with your war claw!" 32 00:01:37,335 --> 00:01:39,925 Roll the 50-sided die to see if you unlock the door. 33 00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:43,644 All we have is a 48-sided die and two marbles. 34 00:01:43,714 --> 00:01:44,654 Close enough. 35 00:01:47,234 --> 00:01:48,294 Did it work? 36 00:01:50,054 --> 00:01:51,084 I don't think so. 37 00:01:51,084 --> 00:01:52,284 This blows. 38 00:01:52,284 --> 00:01:54,194 Mordecai! Mordecai! 39 00:01:54,194 --> 00:01:57,373 But I'll reckon I'd like a turn now! 40 00:01:57,423 --> 00:02:00,573 Cyborg cowboys take three days to awaken from hypersleep. 41 00:02:00,783 --> 00:02:02,093 Sorry, Pops. 42 00:02:02,993 --> 00:02:05,412 Can't he cast a saving throw? 43 00:02:06,342 --> 00:02:08,082 What does all this stuff mean? 44 00:02:08,082 --> 00:02:10,572 Are we even in Darthon yet? 45 00:02:11,382 --> 00:02:13,552 Or is that just an artifact for something? 46 00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:17,471 Your party is suddenly ambushed by a flock of manbats! 47 00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,321 Skips the Mighty gets first strike! 48 00:02:21,571 --> 00:02:22,221 Let's see... 49 00:02:22,301 --> 00:02:24,701 Pirate samurai have plus two times two shen... 50 00:02:24,701 --> 00:02:26,831 minus three charisma... divide by number of geese... 51 00:02:26,831 --> 00:02:27,970 Do we have a protractor? 52 00:02:27,970 --> 00:02:28,850 I'm outta here. 53 00:02:28,850 --> 00:02:31,200 Worst game night ever! 54 00:02:32,090 --> 00:02:34,420 Dude, they're right! This game sucks! 55 00:02:34,420 --> 00:02:35,930 Let's get our money back. 56 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:40,899 Out of the way! Out of the way, everybody! 57 00:02:40,899 --> 00:02:42,809 Coming through, coming through! 58 00:02:42,809 --> 00:02:44,779 Out of the way! Out of the way people! 59 00:02:45,189 --> 00:02:47,349 We're here for a refund. 60 00:02:47,479 --> 00:02:51,208 I'd love to give you a refund, but, you need a receipt for that. 61 00:02:51,208 --> 00:02:52,678 I got a receipt right here. 62 00:02:52,678 --> 00:02:55,008 Excellent. And now the unopened product? 63 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,248 What?! You can't return it if it's opened?! 64 00:02:57,338 --> 00:03:00,967 Well, yes! It's clearly stated on the back of your receipt. 65 00:03:00,967 --> 00:03:03,627 What?! That's lame! You can barely even see the writing! 66 00:03:03,627 --> 00:03:06,567 Yes, well, perhaps if you learned to read, it would be easy for you to see. 67 00:03:06,567 --> 00:03:07,867 Good day, gentlemen! 68 00:03:07,867 --> 00:03:10,626 Dude, just give us our money back. This game blows! 69 00:03:10,626 --> 00:03:13,206 Uh, The Realm of Darthon does not blow! 70 00:03:13,206 --> 00:03:14,916 You're probably doing it wrong. 71 00:03:14,916 --> 00:03:16,566 It's a role-playing game. 72 00:03:16,566 --> 00:03:18,786 You have to use your imagination. 73 00:03:18,786 --> 00:03:21,995 No way, dude! The game is the problem, not us! 74 00:03:21,995 --> 00:03:24,935 Uh, hey, are you guys gonna be wrapping this up soon? 75 00:03:24,935 --> 00:03:27,025 We're done here. 76 00:03:27,835 --> 00:03:32,235 Okay, I guess you won't mind if we tell people how "cool" your game is! 77 00:03:32,324 --> 00:03:36,324 Hey, everybody! Don't waste your time waiting in line for this huge piece. 78 00:03:36,324 --> 00:03:38,464 It's probably the worst game we've ever played. 79 00:03:38,464 --> 00:03:40,194 Yeah, and he won't even give us a refund. 80 00:03:40,194 --> 00:03:42,864 This guy doesn't give refunds, people! 81 00:03:45,243 --> 00:03:48,303 Let's go! I want you two out of my store, now! 82 00:03:51,063 --> 00:03:52,863 We can't let that guy get away with this. 83 00:03:52,863 --> 00:03:55,042 Dude, we spent the last of our cash on it! 84 00:03:55,042 --> 00:03:56,412 We have to get our money back. 85 00:03:58,312 --> 00:04:00,242 So, how do we do that? 86 00:04:00,402 --> 00:04:04,442 We'll just sabotage his business until he gives us our refund. 87 00:04:09,081 --> 00:04:12,841 Heh, nice outfits! Losers! 88 00:04:13,491 --> 00:04:15,041 You don't like these costumes? 89 00:04:15,041 --> 00:04:18,420 But they're from the "Make Your Own" section of the Darthon gamebook! 90 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:22,790 That's right! We followed the instructions perfectly. 91 00:04:22,980 --> 00:04:26,610 But you used toilet paper rolls instead of paper towel rolls! 92 00:04:26,610 --> 00:04:28,949 The costumes look awesome when you do it right. 93 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:32,959 Yeah? Do they look as awesome as the game pieces? 94 00:04:35,179 --> 00:04:38,748 Wait! There's lots of other characters if you don't like the pixie sorcerer! 95 00:04:38,748 --> 00:04:41,998 No there aren't! They're all just the same with different costumes. 96 00:04:44,268 --> 00:04:47,058 I didn't realize it was that kind of game! 97 00:04:47,058 --> 00:04:49,517 Nobody knows what kind of game it is. 98 00:04:49,517 --> 00:04:52,547 Is it medieval? Sci-fi? Western? 99 00:04:52,547 --> 00:04:54,667 It's a role-playing game! 100 00:04:54,667 --> 00:04:56,827 You have to use your imagination! 101 00:04:58,567 --> 00:05:00,946 That's right! Go get us our refund! 102 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:03,556 No way! 103 00:05:06,196 --> 00:05:09,286 Dude. This campaign is just getting started. 104 00:05:59,111 --> 00:06:00,221 That's it! 105 00:06:01,071 --> 00:06:04,251 The Realm of Darthon does not suck! 106 00:06:04,251 --> 00:06:06,250 Yeah, but your costume does. 107 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:13,180 No refunds! 108 00:06:23,199 --> 00:06:25,189 Dude, check out our costumes! 109 00:06:25,269 --> 00:06:27,418 Yeah, where are we? 110 00:06:27,728 --> 00:06:30,778 Welcome, to the Realm of Darthon! 111 00:06:30,778 --> 00:06:33,488 Leave while you still can! 112 00:06:33,718 --> 00:06:36,238 We're not leaving without a refund! 113 00:06:37,967 --> 00:06:39,897 Then come and get it! 114 00:06:44,217 --> 00:06:45,317 Did you hear that? 115 00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:47,497 I think it's coming from a-- ...head! 116 00:06:48,516 --> 00:06:49,996 What are these things? 117 00:06:49,996 --> 00:06:51,246 Ignore it, dude. 118 00:06:51,246 --> 00:06:53,366 They're just lame enemies from the game. 119 00:06:53,366 --> 00:06:56,696 Lame? What do you think of manbats' teamwork? 120 00:07:02,765 --> 00:07:05,395 Next time, send enemies that don't blow! 121 00:07:05,515 --> 00:07:08,425 Well, if you didn't like those enemies, 122 00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:10,844 then how about some Mutant jellyfish! 123 00:07:10,844 --> 00:07:12,764 Robo-bears! 124 00:07:12,764 --> 00:07:15,804 Angry tree people with pixie sorcerers? 125 00:07:21,133 --> 00:07:21,983 Watch out! 126 00:07:23,503 --> 00:07:25,363 Dude! there are too many of the... 127 00:07:25,363 --> 00:07:29,893 Come on! Everyone knows technomancers can summon allies! 128 00:07:29,893 --> 00:07:30,533 Rigby! 129 00:07:31,093 --> 00:07:32,712 Summon allies! 130 00:07:36,542 --> 00:07:40,002 What the?! I told you guys I didn't wanna play this game. 131 00:07:40,002 --> 00:07:41,012 We need your help! 132 00:07:41,012 --> 00:07:43,271 We need the refund from the game master! 133 00:07:43,271 --> 00:07:43,981 What? 134 00:07:48,271 --> 00:07:50,401 When this is over, you two are dead! 135 00:08:05,259 --> 00:08:08,359 I changed my mind! Technomancers can't summon allies! 136 00:08:09,009 --> 00:08:11,469 What?! He's just cheating so he can win! 137 00:08:11,469 --> 00:08:12,699 Quit cheating! 138 00:08:13,039 --> 00:08:16,178 I'm not cheating! I'm using my imagination! 139 00:08:16,178 --> 00:08:18,618 That's what makes this game fun! 140 00:08:18,618 --> 00:08:20,618 That's what makes this game blow! 141 00:08:20,618 --> 00:08:21,378 Enough! 142 00:08:21,828 --> 00:08:25,568 I won't allow you to insult my realm any longer! 143 00:08:30,627 --> 00:08:33,397 I am Darthon! 144 00:08:38,486 --> 00:08:40,906 Still think this game blows? 145 00:08:44,496 --> 00:08:47,735 Lightning bolts have no effect on giant monsters! 146 00:08:49,035 --> 00:08:51,885 Projectile weapons deal damage to the user! 147 00:08:54,355 --> 00:08:57,555 Oh no! You stepped in a permafrost puddle! 148 00:08:58,455 --> 00:09:00,494 Players are frozen in place! 149 00:09:02,214 --> 00:09:03,264 Stay back! 150 00:09:05,234 --> 00:09:06,494 Self-destruct? 151 00:09:09,523 --> 00:09:11,023 We are not frozen. 152 00:09:11,973 --> 00:09:13,633 Looks like it's our turn! 153 00:09:14,803 --> 00:09:17,463 Your party is washed away by a flood! 154 00:09:18,113 --> 00:09:20,542 Our +3 awesomeness repels water! 155 00:09:24,152 --> 00:09:26,202 Fireballs are made of kittens! 156 00:09:26,462 --> 00:09:28,262 Kittens are man-eating tigers! 157 00:09:28,512 --> 00:09:30,542 Man-eating tigers turn into stuffed animals! 158 00:09:32,761 --> 00:09:34,571 Players lose their weapons when running! 159 00:09:36,351 --> 00:09:39,811 Warriors carry the immunity sword, which is immune to all rule changes! 160 00:09:39,961 --> 00:09:42,020 W-what? No! That's not-- 161 00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,160 Now give us our refund. 162 00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:01,879 Yeah, we did it! 163 00:10:02,469 --> 00:10:04,518 Dude, are you okay? 164 00:10:04,798 --> 00:10:07,388 Yeah. I'm fine. Here's your refund. 165 00:10:07,388 --> 00:10:09,308 No, it's cool. You should keep it. 166 00:10:09,308 --> 00:10:11,848 No, no. You beat me fair and square. 167 00:10:12,538 --> 00:10:13,638 Are you sure you're okay? 168 00:10:13,638 --> 00:10:15,947 Yeah. We can take you to the hospital. 169 00:10:15,947 --> 00:10:18,347 No. No. I'm fine. 170 00:10:18,517 --> 00:10:20,887 I just need an icepack. 171 00:10:21,487 --> 00:10:23,087 I... just... gotta... 172 00:10:23,087 --> 00:10:25,237 I gotta go up and lay down for a bit. 173 00:10:26,446 --> 00:10:28,576 Mordecai! Rigby! 174 00:10:28,766 --> 00:10:30,816 Pops! Where have you guys been? 175 00:10:30,816 --> 00:10:33,306 We were hiding in the armor closet, then suddenly, 176 00:10:33,306 --> 00:10:35,466 we were in the stock room at Shoe Farm. 177 00:10:35,466 --> 00:10:39,295 Good thing it was worth it! Seven bones, baby! 178 00:10:39,295 --> 00:10:43,635 Seven dollars?! We almost died for seven dollars?! 179 00:10:43,635 --> 00:10:45,285 The numbers aren't important! 180 00:10:45,285 --> 00:10:46,465 It was the principle! 181 00:10:46,465 --> 00:10:50,324 Yeah! If we're gonna spend that kind of money, it's gotta be on a cool game! 182 00:10:50,404 --> 00:10:54,504 Yeah! Something like Trail of Elderich or The Lair of Anthalon. 183 00:10:54,624 --> 00:10:56,254 Dude! Is that out? 184 00:10:56,254 --> 00:10:58,293 Yeah. It came out last week.