[narrator] Previously on Sister Wives...
You and I have intimacy.
I'm sorry it's conditional based upon being part of a plural family.
[Christine] I feel like, to Kody, Robyn is more important.
I think he has a favorite wife.
And that's why all of this is like it is.
You want to be with me, but you're not courting me to that relationship.
I didn't know I was supposed to court you.
I'm not suggesting that Meri chase me.
In fact, that could be off-putting.
She's not making any effort.
I have somebody in my life who is fundamentally loyal to me,
who sees me as the head of the family.
I'm saying to you that you and I get that if you're loyal to me.
I just can't believe what he's saying.
You and I have been acting like we weren't a married couple
for most of our marriage, Janelle.
Okay, I'm spitting mad now.
You guys, thank you for coming.
Hey, it means a lot to me that you came.
[sobbing]
It's just devastating.
[Kody] I'm sorry I'm angry.
-I just... I just survived a really, really, dark place. -I understand that.
You don't give a [bleep] though.
-Look at you, dismissing it. -Okay.
-[Kody] Would you ever have any empathy for me? -[Robyn] Please don't leave.
-[Kody] When you're in pain, I try to understand you. -Can we just keep talking?
Kody. Can we please keep talking, Janelle? Please?
Janelle, this is a really bad idea for you to walk off on this one.
[voice shaking] Well, all you're doing is yelling at me.
[Kody] Well, the state of the family is... strained.
I mean, like, it almost feels like a civil war.
I- I don't even know how to describe it.
[sighs]
Christine moved me out of her house a year ago.
And she said we were divorced.
And basically, that's been months now.
Meri and I have infrequent interactions.
We talk about what's going on,
having functioned in a marriage-like relationship for about seven or eight years.
It's been a long time.
Things with Janelle and I are pretty strained.
It's like, I can't figure this out
because I'm so upset.
The holidays are coming up. I don't know what we're going to do for the holidays.
The family is not talking.
Today I am getting the trailer ready to haul off to winter storage.
Clean it out, roll in the slides, hook it up
to the truck and take it down south to store for the winter.
You know, when we first all moved to Flagstaff three and a half years ago,
we bought this piece of property with the intention
that we would all build houses here.
And since then, Robyn has bought a house,
and I've been holding out, waiting for this dream on this property, this house.
So, now I've decided to rent an apartment in town for the winter.
But I am kind of sad. I feel like I've somehow failed a little bit.
[Kody] When our family first moved to Flagstaff,
our full intention was to build on our property that we had bought.
Robyn got a rental, Janelle got a rental, Meri found a rental.
A year later, Robyn's rental sold out from under her.
We couldn't find a rental, so we ended up having to buy a house.
Two years later, Janelle should've bought a house.
[Robyn] I did not want to buy a house.
All I wanted was to get out on that property.
Okay, let's see... what we need to here.
Hang on. Hey, there's some stuff I got to trade out,
so it goes to storage with the RV.
Oh, so that it goes to the storage?
-In the back of the storage trailer, -Mmm-hmm.
there's the septic hose.
-Okay, yeah, we got to throw some stuff in, right? -And... Yeah.
Kody and I, since COVID, have really been struggling in our relationship.
Everything really started to fall apart
with the beginning of COVID and the quarantine.
Kody didn't feel like my boys were being very safe. He didn't trust them.
He thought they were going to contaminate us all.
So, I mean, at one point, Garrison, who was very frustrated
with how he felt like I was being neglected called Robyn
and said, "Hey, can we have our dad back? Because he hasn't been around."
Kody feels like Robyn's been severely wronged,
and that my children need to apologize.
I never asked for an apology. I don't want an apology.
I want to be able to be okay with these boys,
and that was never my intention.
[Janelle] And now with some prompting from Robyn,
he's come around to where there has to be a conversation.
But, yeah, I still see no movement on his part towards reconciliation.
-Where are you going for Christmas? -Here, here.
-Okay. -But my kids, they're renting an Airbnb.
Because I don't think they're welcome. Right?
-Well-- -I never said my kids weren't welcome.
-If they apologize, and they're kind of like-- -No, no, no.
All I want to do is talk to 'em.
[Kody] Well, Janelle's going to back east.
See Madi and Caleb for Thanksgiving.
Okay, all right. I get it a little bit.
But I am still sore. I am tender, emotionally, from a divorce.
This would be the time that I would wish that my wife would
look me in the eyes and say, "I support you."
Sure, I've been an ogre.
But I love you and I support you.
I understand what you're going through.
She's not doing any of that.
She's literally telling me she doesn't like me,
she'd prefer other things, she even prefers my ex-wife.
After Christmas, Christine said that
Ysabel and everybody are coming home,
and they want to come see the family here.
Oh, man. This is exactly what I was afraid of
with Christine leaving.
Kody, it just was working out that we had a vacation rental,
so we extended it so Julie and Ysabel can see you,
But you're talking about everybody going to some neutral zone.
This is my house.
Welcome to my house in Utah. [chuckles softly]
I'm really so excited.
So excited.
Like, I left Flagstaff two months ago.
Yeah, it feels like I'm ripping things apart.
I thought that it would just be a little bit easier.
But it's an end of a book. It's an end of a saga. I don't know.
And so, everything just feels a little unsettling.
[Kody] Christine's gone. And Janelle doing stuff with Christine...
She's not doing stuff with the rest of us. Or even me.
[exhales]
So, I don't know what to make of this.
[Robyn] It's tense in the family across the board.
It's tense for a couple of different reasons.
There's Christine leaving. and her divorcing Kody,
it's... there's a lot of tension going on.
Now they're talking about doing Christmas separate.
It's just this whole new like, worrying, heartbreaking stress
about whether or not we'll not be together for Christmas.
But it's still like, horrible to sit and think about.
It's like... It's scaring me and stressing me out a lot.
-I'm letting it out. -I need someone to do my...
[Robyn] From the minute I met the family, we've been doing holidays together.
Every single holiday together.
And this is just such a weird experience to go,
"Who's going to be together for the holidays?"
It just seems so, ugh, screwed up, and I hate it.
What's up?
[Janelle] Okay, I just need to move all this stuff out here.
-Like, all at once? -[Janelle] No. Well, I don't know.
Just put it in the backseat.
[Kody] You know, everybody made choices.
Christine chose to leave.
Janelle's choosing her as somebody that she wants to be close to
rather than Meri and Robyn. Or even me.
People make choices. We made choices all the way along.
So, it frustrates me if anybody in this family
starts acting like they're a victim.
Uh, Jenelle. Uh, go ahead and start pulling it in.
I'm going to watch it.
[whirring]
Yeah, it's going great. Just keep going.
-Oh, sorry. Keep going. -[Janelle] You scared me.
You scared me. Sorry, I heard your voice.
It'll be more of a yell than that if it's not going good.
[Janelle] You know, I think that this trailer thing has been
even more strain on Kody and I's relationship, to be fair.
I didn't anticipate it. I thought we'd have this grand adventure,
didn't anticipate it would be so hard.
[whirring]
-[whirring stops] -Good.
And when it wasn't all easy and it wasn't comfortable,
and it was hard, I think Kody really got disillusioned very fast.
And it was very easy for him to blame me for this.
Okay, I'm going to close this trailer.
And then, uh, we can hook up and leave.
As soon as the dang land is paid off,
I can break ground.
So, I'll come back out next spring 'cause we have one year
until the property has to be paid off.
You know, when we brought this property, the seller carried the note.
He carried the loan.
And as any other bank, he has the right to foreclose if we default on the loan.
So, the clock is really ticking.
We could lose it all if we default.
I really, really would like to have an amiable divorce.
-How's it going? -How are you?
-Oh, here's... I didn't... -Oh.
-Nice to see you. -[laughs] Hi.
I'm not feeling like I'm in a great place.
It was late up with covid. I was out of my mind.
-But when I talk about getting anxiety, Christine, -Sorry, I'm sorry. [laughs]
-the depression-- -I know, and I'm sorry to even laugh a little bit.
But Gwendolyn was like--
-You didn't mean it that way. It's okay. -Yeah. I...
I'm back in Flagstaff again, just visiting with family, Janelle, her kids.
[knocking at door]
Come in.
-Hey, Janelle. [gasps] -[Janelle] Oh, hey.
I know. So, I got the bookshelf that we walked about.
For right here?
-Oh, my gosh. -[Janelle] Yes, 'cause I'm struggling, like with
-all the... where to put everything. -[Christine] That's beautiful.
-That's perfect. -So, okay.
-[Janelle] Cool. -Yeah, let's do it.
[Janelle] Let's put it. If you want to help me, 'cause I'm
-sort of intimidated about putting it together. -Please.
This is my favorite thing to do.
I'm visiting Janelle in her apartment today.
This is the first time that I get to see it.
And she asked if I would come over and help her build the shelf. [laughs]
Here.
Oh, there.
-'Cause my steak knives, really, actually are just... -Oh, no.
-And Paedon's like, "Make sure you don't use those knives -[Savanah chuckles]
to cut carboard." I'm like, "Oh, my gosh."
-I'm definitely using this knives. -I need him to...
-Oh, my word. That looks intimidating. -No it's not. It's fine.
Yeah, I still consider Janelle my sister wife. It's super weird, I think.
But it's just that we're not really just friends.
Christine and I, especially when she first came into the family,
I just did not get her.
I thought she was a princess. I did.
And she thought I was bossy. [chuckles]
[Christine] When I married Kody,
I didn't really even know Janelle that much.
Like, at first, I thought we were okay.
So, Christine and I have joked, "Are we still sister wives?"
We both say yes, even though it's not really
the traditional sense of the word.
This is also the back of the...
-Is that what this... That's what this is, too. -Hmm.
-Oh, weird... -Now, it's a hat.
-Oh, honey. So cute. -[Savanah laughs]
It's so weird to consider the whole sister wife word.
But then I had to think about all the other people in the world that tell me,
"Hey, I consider my best friend my sister wife." And I'm like,
"Heck. If they consider their best friend their sister wife,
I can consider Janelle my sister wife."
Do you like it better than your fifth wheel? The apartment?
[Janelle] Well, yes, It's definitely simpler.
See, I thought we would be some much further along in the building process,
but that's just taking a long time.
'Cause of the building, how's it going? You're still going to...
[Janelle] No, I have my plans.
-For your house? -[Janelle] Yeah.
I mean, I will say, if anything has come out of this crazy summer
where I made a gamble, it wasn't awesome,
like, I have a plan.
-Can you reach them with your long arms? -[Christine] Yeah.
[Janelle] I know what the property looks like.
I have at least a freaking driveway out of this whole thing. [laughs]
-Okay, I want to see. -Okay.
Oh, my gosh. I so excited for you. Are you excited?
-Yes. -When do you think you're going
-to break ground and stuff? Any ideas? -Uh...
-Spring probably. -No. Really?
Yeah, and then it takes about, for these little houses, like, six months.
-Six to nine months. -[gasps]
[Christine] I think if Janelle wants to build, then she should definitely build.
The thing is I know they haven't paid off the property.
[Kody] I don't think we're going to be building on this property by spring.
Coming up with money to pay off Coyote Pass,
very difficult.
Coming up with a downpayment on a house: not hard.
We could've done that. But Janelle was refusing to do that.
So, it's just small. Just 1200 square feet.
-'Cause that's what we can do. -1200?
-That's what we can do with the county. -It's a casita.
-Oh, so this is a casita. -And then eventually, like...
Yeah, and then we'll stay in it
while she goes to school or whatever, once we build.
-Yeah. -Perfect.
You know, I think the biggest problem in forward movement is just this
argument that the family has whether we have
the ability to pay off the property or not.
See, Kody's like, "We don't have the money." I'm like, "We have the money.
We're in the same situation we were in when we gave Christine the money
for her house, and definitely when we gave Robyn the money for her house.
I just feel like nobody's watching out for me. Nobody's prioritizing me.
It's not a five-alarm fire."
I feel like I'm just watching, but I can be your beautiful assistant.
You are going to be my beautiful assistant.
That's a joke, Savanah, we always make about your dad.
He always needs a beautiful assistant when he does something.
Right? It's true.
When Dad is working on something,
he's always like, "No, no, no, no. Let me do it."
And he's always like, frustrated when you don't do it the way he wants you.
And eventually, you just become like, "Can you bring me this tool?"
Or, "Can you hold the flashlight?""
And it's just like you don't even really do much
-except criticize what he does. -[all laughing]
So you need a hammer,
-and a flathead screwdriver and a Philips. -[Savanah] Uh-oh.
Usually, when I was Kody's beautiful assistant,
I would just... you know, it was great. It was a lot of fun.
I loved doing stuff like that.
I loved seeing how things work and how to fix things. I love it.
So, I would never mind.
But if he got too intense, I'd just start messing with him.
I'd be like, "I don't think it's supposed to be like that."
And he would get really frustrated. [laughing]
No, I wouldn't do it on purpose, totally.
If things got too intense, they just needed to come down a little bit.
That is my job, as a beautiful assistant, to calm him down.
So, holidays.
Kody's still feeling like the boys
need to have a conversation with him or whatever.
So, we're separate.
So you're not going to go over to Robyn's house for Christmas?
No. Kody feels like they owe him a big apology
and some sort of conversation and stuff
-for being disrespectful and-- -Have they been disrespectful?
I think it was a disagreement.
[Kody] The whole reason I'm in this place with the boys
is 'cause I don't want to have a holiday experience
where we haven't already cleared the air.
Or something political comes up.
Or something about COVID, or my own experience with it, or anything comes up,
and we end up devolving into an angry conversation.
That's a stupidity that I'm not going to bring into my house for holidays.
I mean, I always said, I'd pick my kids before Kody. And that sounds like
-is that what-- -[Janelle] What am I going to do?
Go over to Robyn's house and hangout?
Savanah, you go to Robyn's house and hangout with Robyn's kids and Meri and Kody?
They're not going to do Christmas together.
Janelle's going to do Christmas with her kids.
Because Kody has to have a conversation with his sons?
[sighs] The whole thing frankly makes me nauseous.
Is me leaving Kody causing any problems?
Like, he told me, like, you're breaking up the family and it's your fault
-that we're splitting. You... -[Savanah] Whoa!
-[Christine] Is it? -No, I don't think so. He's angry.
[Christine] I think he's just angry at her, right?
He's really angry and he admits that
-that he's really angry. -Okay
Kody told me I was breaking up the family.
Like, it's my fault that the family is breaking up.
Dude.
If my relationship with my sister wives is up to me,
and it's my fault that I have a bad relationship with my sister wives,
why isn't it your fault if you have a bad relationship with your children?
Do I worry that we will be able to turn this around? Absolutely.
-Oh, really? It's that bad? -I am worried just because Kody is in such a place
where he just is like, "I'm just tired of doing all the work
to hold the family together."
And I feel like, as a husband in a plural family,
that's kind of your responsibility.
When a wife, like Janelle, undermines your rules
she undermines my ability to actually lead in the family.
I could be a great leader in the family,
and I should be in spite of their undermining.
But I don't have the exposure to the children
that the mothers have in this family.
So, having the mothers support me would be the thing to do.
Like, you can't be a husband in a plural family and just be like,
-"Well, I don't want to do any more work." -No, you cant.
"I want you guys to all get together so it's easy for me."
-I'm sorry, that's not how it works. -[Christine] It doesn't work.
[Janelle] I mean, look, Kody and I have been through some tough spots,
and we've always come out of them.
But I can't really be in a full relationship with him
if he's going to be estranged from my children.
I just...
It just seems really wrong.
Well, you got the pegs. And so, if you look in the...
In the things, it has like, a number four is there.
I mean, look, a big part of my relationship with Kody has been the fact
that he was such an engaged father. He was such a good dad.
And now he doesn't want to be that anymore.
So, I don't even know who that guy is.
Who is that guy?
I'm trying really hard not to feel like it's the end of our world.
And like, it's just hopeless. Completely hopeless.
This whole thing with Kody and Christine has just floored me.
And I know that... I know that [sighs] that there was,
like, issues and stuff like that. But every marriage has issues.
Was there stuff that I didn't know about?
Hey, I saw you pull up.
-Hi. -Hi.
How's it going?
-Hey, Meri. -It's cold, Robyn.
I think I remember Kody giving you some coats for Christmas.
-Where are they? [laughs] -Yeah, yeah.
-Well, they're at home. -Do you want me to go get you another...
-They're at home in my closet. -...blanket?
-No, I forgot to bring it. -Do you want me to get you another blanket?
-It's possible this might not keep me warm enough. -[laughs]
-I'll go get you one. -It's that time of year that it's like
-coming out of fall and I forget that it's cold outside. -[laughing]
So mine and Kody's relationship is basically
we see each other when I come over to Robyn's house.
I've heard him refer to us as friends, which is kind of weird for me.
Because I think friends talk to each other
more than Kody and I talk to each other.
-It's Kody's. -Aw, it'll be kind of like Kody's giving me hug.
[both laughing]
-I can like, squeeze you and put it on you. -That's... Do that.
-You can just close your eyes. -Do that.
-[laughing] -It probably won't... [chuckles]
I'll just pretend. Thank you.
-Well, thank you. -You're welcome, honey.
-Okay, okay. -[both laughing]
There was a time when he would give me his coat to wear.
He would be all chivalrous when it was cold.
And now Robyn's being all chivalrous for me, for him.
Ah, it's a very nice coat. Maybe it will go missing.
So, not too long ago,
Kody and Jenelle and Robyn and I all got together,
and we had a discussion about the holidays,
and who's going to be around, and what's going to happen with that.
The last I knew is that the boys couldn't come
until they showed respect and apologized.
-And this is the year-- -Please do no communicate to my children for me.
Because you and I struggle enough to communicate.
-I'm afraid that message will get mixed. -What was I supposed to say?
"Call Dad."
Yeah, that conversation was very emotional.
Okay. Am I the only one that sees this as some kind of betrayal?
It's just a big mess. And so, I just want to
And so, I just wanna talk to Meri about, like,
what she wants to do for the holidays.
She's the only one that's interested,
in, uh, spending it together.
Please go on.
Just trying to again wrap my brain around, uh,
-kind of some of the last few conversations, but... -[Meri] Mmm-hmm.
...you know, just...
you know, no matter what's going on with the parents,
I gotta make sure my kids have a good Thanksgiving, so...
I mean, are you gonna be around or...
-Yes. -[Robyn] Okay.
-Is that okay? [chuckles] -[Robyn] Yes.
I... But, I mean, you've got Mariah.
I just... You just never know.
-No, I'll be here. -[Robyn] So, I just don't wanna assume.
-No. -[Robyn] So...
I'm really struggling with what's going on right now
with the rest of the family.
Not just with Christine leaving,
but the boys and Kody and Janelle and all that stuff,
it's just like,
"Who are you people? I don't get it."
I'm grateful that Meri...
is not giving up on our family.
It's ironic because she...
wants to keep figuring this out and working it out.
But yeah, her and Kody or where they're at.
And I just wish it was different.
I do.
But yeah, no, I'll be here.
-So, it's you and me again... -[Meri] Yeah. [chuckling]
...pulling this off.
Last year's Thanksgiving was weird,
in that it wasn't our whole family.
Usually, during the holidays,
it's just all of us, and it's...
big and loud and fun and...
it wasn't that.
-[pensive music playing] -[indistinct conversation]
It's just Robyn and Kody and her kids and me.
[chuckling] Are you gonna do the turkey again?
[Robyn] If... if you want me to. Yeah, if we want to.
-I do want you to. -[Robyn] Okay. Okay, cool.
Kody really liked it.
-Oh, yeah. -[Meri] And it's nice to not have to mess with it.
[both laughing]
Last year, I made the meat turkey, the animal turkey,
and Meri made a Rice Krispies turkey,
and she stuffed it with chocolate, candies and stuff.
-[woman] Oh, my God. -[man] Wait a second. Wait.
-What is that? Oh, my God. -[woman] That sauce.
-[woman] Oh, that's so fun. -[indistinct conversation]
[Meri] Okay, listen. I have done the turkey for years.
Kody used to like my turkey until he had Robyn's,
and I guess hers is that much...
That just sounds...
[laughing loudly]
Mine is sweet, hers is savory.
He could like it both if he wanted.
He did sign up for liking everybody's turkeys.
[chuckling] Can we just stop?
It's weird 'cause this whole situation
has me thinking so much,
and... and I'm going... [clears throat]
Trying really hard not to get, like...
What's that word when you're just feeling
like everything's falling apart and it's bad?
-Oh, yeah, that everything's falling apart and it's bad. -[both chuckle]
-I'm trying not to get... What is that word? -[Meri] I hear ya.
-There's a word. -[Meri] I don't know, is there a word for that?
Mmm, like, you're just... kind of letting it
kind of hold you down sort of thing, and I'm...
I'm thinking about other plural families a lot.
And, like, the... the knowledge that I know about other plural families.
How do they operate in these situations?
I'm trying really hard not to feel like it's the end of our world
and like that... like it's just hopeless, completely hopeless.
I'm looking for some light at the end of the tunnel 'cause...
'cause I'm struggling so bad.
I mean, I'm struggling not to be, like, blue
and crying constantly and depressed and stuff like that.
I still think there's ways to get it figured out and fixed,
but I feel like...
You know, I just need to, like, look at it from a different perspective
so I don't go all dark every single time I think about it.
'Cause it just feels so much like...
Uh, it's such a difference and such a...
a deviation from that big picture
-that, you know, that I wanted, and... -Yeah.
[Robyn] ...saw and wanted. I mean,
COVID's really made me wonder if...
what I saw was real,
and I'm not trying to be insulting there,
but it's making me wonder if it was as real as I thought it was
because of what has happened
the last, you know, year and a half.
I'm struggling with depression over it.
I feel like...
I feel like we've failed, you know?
I feel like it's been
definitely amplified,
definitely amplified during COVID.
-"The tension that was always there" kind of thing? -[Meri] I don't know how--
Was it... was it there, Meri?
Like, I just... I seriously want to sit down
and go, "Okay, was there things I was missing
when I first came in the family with you guys
that I didn't quite realize were underneath everything?"
Like, this whole thing with Kody and Christine, it's just floored me.
And I know that... I mean, I know that...
that there was, like, issues and stuff like that,
but every marriage has issues.
Was there stuff that I didn't know about?
-[Kody] Nice to see you. -[Christine chuckling] Hi.
I think it's good to just things lighthearted
and keep things casual as much as possible.
'Cause who knows what's gonna happen
in the next ten seconds?
I have no idea.
[Meri] When Robyn came into the family,
if she saw that we were perfect,
either we were all really good actors
or she had blinders on. [chuckles] I don't know.
[pensive music playing]
A couple of days ago, I asked Kody
if he could meet me at Salsa Brava
just to discuss Truely and what she's doing
and how she is and then the holidays as well.
I really, really would like to have an amiable divorce,
you know, be able to talk to him about stuff.
[pensive music playing]
I don't really know how I feel about meeting for lunch.
I'm not feeling like I'm in a great place.
-[Kody] Thank you. -[maître d'] You're welcome.
-[Kody] Hey. -Hey.
-Thanks a lot. -[Christine] Hi.
-How's it going? -[Christine] How are you?
-Here's... Oh, here's... -Oh,
[Christine] I didn't...
-[Kody] Nice to see you. -[Christine chuckling] Hi.
Good to see you, too.
So, what are... Uh, well, we...
Are we ordering, or are we talking business first?
Well, we can do whatever.
So... No, I'm really not talking business.
-[Kody] Oh, I thought-- -I just wanna talk to you
-about the holidays a little bit. -[Kody] Okay.
-It's not business. -[Kody] Okay.
I think it's good to just things lighthearted
and keep things casual as much as possible.
'Cause who knows what's gonna happen
in the next ten seconds?
I have no idea.
Like, I just... I seriously want to sit down
and go, "Okay, was there things I was missing?"
[Meri] When Robyn came into the family,
we were not a perfect family,
but we were a really good family.
I think people are looking back
and trying to pick it apart,
if she saw that we were perfect,
then either we were all really good actors
or she had blinders on. [chuckles] I don't know.
And I'm not saying that to be rude.
We just... We were not perfect, but we were good.
I don't know. I don't know what their relationship was.
But it's not...
It's not what I would've expected from Christine.
It's also not what I would've expected from Kody.
[Robyn] Like, everything that's going on with Kody and Christine,
and then everything that what happened through COVID,
I am questioning my reality.
[clears throat] I'm starting to even wonder
if I didn't really know what was happening back then.
I am... I'm not the only person in love with Robyn.
[all chuckling]
I'm... I'm just looking for answers 'cause I don't understand this.
I know some people would be like, "What does it matter?"
But it matters to me.
And when I got divorced,
uh, you know, it was... it was a tough situation,
and my most important thing was my kids
and feeling like there was a safe family
to be a part of.
And when I met Kody's family,
I saw them operating as one family.
I saw all these different things going on in the family
that seemed very functional.
Like, I thought this was a safe place for my kids to be.
[Kody] The first 20 years of our family... [chuckles]
was pretty dysfunctional.
And I think because we wanted to be functional,
we had a very different attitude about it.
We were trying so hard
that we believed we were functional,
but we weren't.
[Janelle] You know, once Robyn entered the family,
there was a shake-up.
And I don't know if things were ever settled again.
[Christine] We became very, very separate,
and the family traditions stopped.
And I don't know, and I'm not accusing Robyn
of stopping all the family traditions.
I don't know what happened.
I just know
that us getting together again as a family stopped happening.
Are you having a hard time with it? 'Cause you don't sleep much.
[Meri] I feel, like,
just completely rejected.
Like, I know what our relationship used to be,
and it was good and it was fun and we laughed a lot.
Hold on, Christine, I'm gonna go look at that one.
I think that one might beat the other one.
[Christine] Holy hell, if you go look over there, I'll tackle you.
-[Meri chuckles] -I will tackle you.
[woman 1] I wanna see that. I wanna see it.
[woman 2] Run, Meri! Run! Run!
-Oh! -[Christine] Oh, my God.
[both panting and chuckling playfully]
[Meri] Yeah, so I don't know. And then, you know,
clearly, when she was telling us when we were there last time...
[sighs]
...over at her house, when she was telling us she was leaving,
and she basically said to us,
"Well, I don't wanna have a relationship
or work on things with you guys."
Are you interested in some sort of a...
like, trying to work stuff out?
I think for right now, I need space.
-[Robyn] Okay. -For right now.
So, some of the emotions that I have been feeling
throughout this whole situation
and the things that I've said are,
I'm angry and I feel betrayed.
But I... know 100% that that is a secondary emotion,
and really, I'm just sad.
[sighs] You know, I always thought that,
like, one day, there would be
the closeness that I wanted.
You know, we would come... someday figure it out.
You know, you hear the... the ladies
in our culture and church talk about that.
I mean, I know that she doesn't believe in this anymore.
And maybe that is just as simple as that. I don't know.
But I don't know, 'cause like, I would...
I would choose our family
even if I didn't have a belief anymore.
Yeah.
[Meri] People tell me all the time,
"Oh, well, you're only staying there because you're forced to
and you think that you can't go to heaven without it."
It's, like, bull. Like, you don't know me.
[Christine] What are you gonna do?
Like, you can either laugh about things
or cry about things.
And if you can't look back with a sense of humor,
what a waste.
[Robyn] I don't know. I don't... I don't...
And I don't... I don't wanna, like, judge or something like that,
but I just felt like...
I kept kinda having this, like,
"Someday, we'll figure stuff out.
We can have that closeness still.
We'll figure out the issues or whatever.
We'll have the closeness."
And then, when she talked about leaving,
it just... Oh, man, it shattered me.
[Meri] We all believe in a God.
But if we're not involved in our church anymore,
how does that affect it?
Even if we don't believe in church or authority
or even the principle of plural marriage,
even if we got to that point,
like, we still are a family.
This thing that I thought we could figure out,
you know, this kind of end goal,
you know, just got taken away.
[Meri] People tell me all the time, you know,
"Oh, well, you're only staying there because you're forced to
and you think that you can't go to heaven without it."
It's, like, bull. Like, you don't know me.
When I married Kody, I made a commitment to him,
and I loved him and I still love him
and I still honor that commitment.
And when we decided that we...
wanted to have a plural family,
I didn't make that decision because...
I thought that was the only way I was gonna get to heaven.
I made the decision because I loved Kody
and I wanted to spend
my eternities with him.
I know that everybody is dealing with it in different ways,
and I know that Kody's dealing with it in a very, very big way,
and we need to acknowledge that and...
I'm not trying to, like, tell anybody what to do,
but, like, he really, really is going
through some major, weird stuff in his head
trying to figure this out.
I probably talk to him maybe once every other week...
-[Robyn] Mmm-hmm. -...and I can see that.
Well, I think that's why I'm, like, trying to say, like,
we need to kinda carry the... the torch
'cause he's been kinda carrying it, like,
a long time, and he's tired.
[crying] Yeah, he's so discouraged.
[chuckles softly]
You guys, if somebody just can pick up that torch,
then it's gonna go out.
I mean, I respect that and I'm okay with that and whatever,
-and I'm open to having, you know, conversations... -[Robyn] Mmm-hmm.
-...that involve me... -[Robyn] Mmm-hmm.
-[Meri] ...that I would need to be included in. -Mmm-hmm.
[Meri] I would worry about...
that he is expecting, like, 100% perfection
in order to, like, move forward.
I completely understand
and support what Robyn's talking about.
But because mine and Kody's relationship
is basically non-existent,
it's not a strong relationship,
I don't think that he would recognize
any support that I was giving
to the family or to him.
I feel like Kody is pretty...
He's so optimistic, and he has the tendency to be really, like...
I watched him, like, sort of change his tune with someone.
Like, he'll be mad at somebody one day,
and then he changes his tune about what he thinks
and what's going on with him
just based on, like, a good day or a couple of good days
or good... you know...
you know, he's connecting or whatever it is.
And so, I think if we're just, like, diligently trying
to actually talk,
actually communicate what the issues are,
you know, I wanna try and do. 'Cause he's...
Yeah, he's just tired, but...
[Meri] Life is heavy on him.
Like, he doesn't smile,
he doesn't laugh, he doesn't joke,
at least not when I'm around.
It's just this heavy, heavy scowl.
I mean, it's the only thing I feel like is...
the only we're gonna be able to, like,
you know, pick up the baton for him
-as if we're doing it together, the three of us. -Yeah.
I mean, wouldn't that be just, be really cool, Meri?
Just to, like, get together and...
look at everybody in the room and feel like,
"I trust them and they trust me"?
Yeah, it would.
I appreciate that I have that with you.
I have her back.
Do I agree with everything that she does
or thinks or says? No.
All right, I guess I'll give you back
-[sigh] the pretend Kody hug. -[Robyn laughs]
[Meri] You know, Kody and I have been in... in this place
for quite a while,
where we're just, I guess...
The word that you would put to it would be "estranged."
And this has been going on for quite a few years,
but I am also in this place of working it out.
-See ya. -[Robyn chuckling] Bye.
[Meri] You know, I think there's work that we would have to do,
but I think that we could do it,
you know, if we actually just put the effort in.
[Kody] Seeing Christine for the first time is like,
"Hey, how are ya?"
Well, it's a little uncomfortable, but...
"Um, hope you're doing well."
I feel so betrayed
after all that I have done for this marriage,
and then to have her sort of [bleep] talk me to the kids,
I kind of feel like, in my heart,
"I just never wanna see her again,
and I wanna spend some time hating her."
Anyway, you wanted to talk about Christmas.
Holidays. Right, Christmas.
-[Kody] Holidays. -Okay, okay.
Um, so I was thinking
about leaving a couple of days after Christmas.
So, like, the 27th, we're gonna drive down.
So, we'll be here for a few days
between Christmas and New Year's.
Can you guys test in Utah?
So, even though you had COVID and everything,
you still want us to test?
Well, Aurora hasn't had COVID.
-And she's... -[gasps] Wait, seriously?
-So, everyone got it but Aurora? -[Kody] No, she never got...
-Nope, she never got it. Yeah, isn't that trippy? -[gasps]
I haven't talked to Kody about COVID.
I really, honestly forgot how concerned he is about it.
You... you travel here, you get here, you take the test.
-Okay. -What I'd like to do is have 'em come over
if they can, stay close,
go see everybody else after
-so that we've got 'em just solid. -[Christine] Okay.
Then they're just gonna go up to Robyn's house,
and I'll just go over to the rental
and just hang out with Janelle and the kids.
I'm not going to go to Robyn's, no.
No, that's... No. Why?
Um, I... When Janelle told us
that she and her kids are gonna do Christmas separate from us,
it... broke my heart. It was very sad to hear it.
-Thank you. -[Christine] Mmm-hmm.
-So, Gwendlyn's not gonna be here for Christmas. -[Christine] Mmm-mmm.
Uh, I was sick during her birthday with the...
I was laid up with COVID.
[chuckling] You also had other issues.
Was she thinking that was funny, too?
I was out of my mind.
-But when I talk about getting anxiety, -Sorry, I'm so--
Christine, and depression...
I know, and I'm sorry to even laugh a little bit,
-but Gwendlyn was like... -[Kody] Oh.
You didn't mean it that way, it's okay.
-I... -[Kody chuckles]
[Christine] I was married to him for 27 years, all right?
Every time that guy got sick,
it was like the whole world revolved around his being sick.
COVID was overwhelming for me,
not being able to sleep and not being able to breathe.
[chuckling] I'm sorry, I really...
The... Kody, her description of you is what's funny.
What are you gonna do?
Like, you can either laugh about things
or cry about things.
And if you can't look back with a sense of humor,
what a waste.
I was in the fetal position on the floor, sobbing.
Well, I'm not laughing.
I'm not laughing here. I'm not laughing...
I haven't been laughing with her leaving.
I've never been laughing about this thing.
She... she... she asked me to stop staying at her place,
I wasn't laughing then.
She moved my stuff into the garage,
I wasn't laughing then.
She left with Truely, and she left early,
I wasn't laughing then.
I've never been laughing about this.
[laughing] My reactions were just terrible today.
I'm so sorry.
I'm not married to him anymore.
It's so freaking awesome.
[Kody] This season onSister Wives...
Do you really wanna still have a plural family?
Sometimes, I can't tell.
I'm in this bad place with Janelle, and Christine's gone.
Don't even know what to do with Meri.
I don't want you to think that I'm walking away
because, I'm sorry, I still have hope.
[Kody] In my head, I'm really wondering
why she lives in Flagstaff.
I'm growing, and I need something different.
Like, I don't wanna be married anymore.
There's no question, Robyn.
He's done with me.
Kody's gonna do what Kody's gonna do.
You know what, Robyn? Have him.
We're all grown adults
that don't need a father figure anymore.
I've really struggled.
I've been pretty grouchy, very, very angry.
So, you're still kind of angry and stuff?
Yeah, I've got anger issues.
[Meri] This is not the happy-go-lucky Kody Brown that I used to know.
So, what partnership do we have?
This is not only me, Kody.
Don't you dare point your finger at me.
I just wanted to let you know I'm not gonna be around.
It's not what I want.
[choking up] I wanted to sit on a porch
with my sister wives,
with her kids and her grandkids.
Everything is changing.
There's been a lot of, dare I say, drama?
Everybody's angry.
Everybody's angry, right?
[Kody] I worked so hard to do what was right.
And when you lose them, well,
I should just be the devil I think I am now.
-[Kody] No, you make this excuse forever. -Listen to me.
But I've--
Shut your [bleep] mouth and let me talk to you for a minute.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
-You stay and talk. -[Kody] I'm done listening to you.
-Okay, so... -[Kody] Goodbye.
[bleep] you.