1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:02,482 [Kody] Previously on Sister Wives... 2 00:00:02,482 --> 00:00:05,000 So Janelle's coming into town and we're going to Idaho 3 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:05,965 to see my brothers. 4 00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:08,482 I'm sitting here because my finances are all so 5 00:00:08,482 --> 00:00:11,103 mush-mashed right now with everybody's. 6 00:00:11,103 --> 00:00:14,827 I really feel strongly that women should all be empowered 7 00:00:14,827 --> 00:00:16,172 in plural marriage 8 00:00:16,172 --> 00:00:19,103 with financial choices, with claim on their husband's estates. 9 00:00:19,103 --> 00:00:22,103 That would level the playing field like... [exhales] 10 00:00:22,103 --> 00:00:24,172 You guys haven't seen your dad for a while, right? 11 00:00:24,310 --> 00:00:25,172 Nope. 12 00:00:25,172 --> 00:00:27,000 -Have you heard from him? -Nope, nope. 13 00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:29,103 Kody's relationship with his older children, 14 00:00:29,103 --> 00:00:31,206 a lot of them were really, really good. 15 00:00:31,206 --> 00:00:34,586 Christine left, and all that changed. 16 00:00:34,586 --> 00:00:35,793 And you know what, Robyn? 17 00:00:35,793 --> 00:00:39,068 Have him, because we don't care anymore. 18 00:00:39,068 --> 00:00:41,689 I think every kid needs a dad, always. 19 00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:48,379 [Meri] He actually said to me, "I have no desire, 20 00:00:48,379 --> 00:00:52,482 Meri, to have a relationship with you." 21 00:00:52,482 --> 00:00:54,172 He said, "Don't you understand, Meri? 22 00:00:54,172 --> 00:00:56,482 This is never going to happen." 23 00:00:56,482 --> 00:00:58,275 He said, I just have so much criticism. 24 00:00:58,275 --> 00:01:00,896 I don't want to be open and vocal about it. 25 00:01:00,896 --> 00:01:02,931 Let's just keep this between us. 26 00:01:02,931 --> 00:01:04,965 This is my story, too. 27 00:01:06,517 --> 00:01:08,379 [dramatic music playing] 28 00:01:08,379 --> 00:01:11,034 And I have the right to tell my story. 29 00:01:11,827 --> 00:01:14,172 [opening theme music playing] 30 00:01:32,413 --> 00:01:34,551 [music playing] 31 00:01:43,378 --> 00:01:45,172 All right, it is October. 32 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:48,275 There's been a lot of stuff going on. 33 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:54,172 So April was mine and Kody's 32nd anniversary. 34 00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:58,275 And our anniversaries... 35 00:02:00,482 --> 00:02:03,034 ...have been interesting for the past few years. [chuckles] 36 00:02:04,172 --> 00:02:09,172 Our very first anniversary in Flagstaff, he called me. 37 00:02:09,172 --> 00:02:11,275 He's like, "Hey, let's go out on a drive." 38 00:02:11,275 --> 00:02:14,689 Let's go to the Grand Canyon. We went to dinner afterwards. 39 00:02:14,689 --> 00:02:18,482 Even though we had not been living together 40 00:02:18,482 --> 00:02:21,896 for quite a few years, he said things to me 41 00:02:22,793 --> 00:02:25,103 on that date that 42 00:02:25,103 --> 00:02:29,689 completely led me to believe that he was... 43 00:02:29,689 --> 00:02:33,000 wanting to start a relationship with me again. 44 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,517 He literally said, "Sheers to a new beginning." 45 00:02:36,517 --> 00:02:39,000 So this year for our anniversary, number 32, 46 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:43,827 while we were out to dinner, I was just like, 47 00:02:43,827 --> 00:02:45,482 I'm staying around. 48 00:02:45,482 --> 00:02:49,067 I'm, you know, I see value in the family 49 00:02:49,067 --> 00:02:53,689 and my commitment and in our relationship. 50 00:02:54,482 --> 00:02:55,965 And... 51 00:02:57,689 --> 00:03:01,793 He's like, "Meri, that's not happening." 52 00:03:01,793 --> 00:03:03,931 Like, that's never gonna happen. 53 00:03:03,931 --> 00:03:06,482 We're not ever going to have a relationship again. 54 00:03:06,482 --> 00:03:09,896 We're not going to be a married couple ever. 55 00:03:09,896 --> 00:03:12,620 So for the past six months, since he had that 56 00:03:12,620 --> 00:03:14,586 conversation with me, 57 00:03:14,586 --> 00:03:18,310 I've had to really take a lot of time to figure out 58 00:03:18,310 --> 00:03:19,793 what I need. 59 00:03:19,793 --> 00:03:24,241 And the fact that there really is... 60 00:03:25,275 --> 00:03:29,517 No commitment or covenant. He's already broken it. 61 00:03:29,517 --> 00:03:31,931 I really feel like I was emotionally abandoned 62 00:03:31,931 --> 00:03:34,067 by him many, many years ago. 63 00:03:35,275 --> 00:03:37,137 Well before the catfishing. 64 00:03:39,482 --> 00:03:42,000 Well before the catfishing. 65 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,172 It's really no secret that Meri and Kody have had problems 66 00:03:44,172 --> 00:03:46,896 for a very, very, very long time. 67 00:03:46,896 --> 00:03:50,689 Above all, Meri is very loyal, and she's very much a person 68 00:03:50,689 --> 00:03:53,482 of her word, and she feels like she gave a commitment. 69 00:03:53,482 --> 00:03:54,862 But I wonder, 70 00:03:56,379 --> 00:03:59,241 At what point, if it's not very healthy for her? 71 00:04:00,379 --> 00:04:04,689 So then, about a month ago, I saw where he actually said, 72 00:04:04,689 --> 00:04:08,517 "No, I don't consider myself married to Meri anymore." 73 00:04:08,517 --> 00:04:11,724 Usually, our church would say you're divorced. 74 00:04:11,724 --> 00:04:14,482 -You have to go ask for a divorce. -Yeah, yeah. 75 00:04:14,482 --> 00:04:16,896 You have to get paperwork. You have to get approval. 76 00:04:16,896 --> 00:04:20,481 You have to prove that the marriage is broken. 77 00:04:20,481 --> 00:04:23,310 [Kody] I don't really consider myself married to Meri. 78 00:04:23,310 --> 00:04:25,482 If she wanted to move on and marry another, 79 00:04:25,482 --> 00:04:28,517 she wouldn't get in an argument with me. 80 00:04:28,517 --> 00:04:31,896 [Meri] That was pretty insulting and pretty vulgar, 81 00:04:32,793 --> 00:04:35,896 for him to just be open to that. 82 00:04:35,896 --> 00:04:38,275 I think it's disgusting how Kody's been dragging Meri 83 00:04:38,275 --> 00:04:39,517 along for years. 84 00:04:39,517 --> 00:04:41,793 And I think it's equally as disgusting that Robyn's like, 85 00:04:41,793 --> 00:04:43,586 "Stay with the family, stay with the family." 86 00:04:43,586 --> 00:04:44,896 Let that girl go. 87 00:04:47,206 --> 00:04:49,000 [Meri] Okay, what do I do next? 88 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:53,586 Like, do I have a conversation with Robyn and just say, 89 00:04:53,586 --> 00:04:54,793 "Hey, Kody and I have talked 90 00:04:54,793 --> 00:04:56,482 and this is not going anywhere?" 91 00:04:56,482 --> 00:04:58,000 Because she's gonna care. 92 00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:01,000 She's probably the only person who's gonna care. 93 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,379 Kody and I are gonna need to have some conversations. 94 00:05:04,379 --> 00:05:09,689 And then, like, really, do I even bother 95 00:05:09,689 --> 00:05:11,448 staying in Flagstaff at this point? 96 00:05:15,379 --> 00:05:17,655 [upbeat music playing] 97 00:05:25,827 --> 00:05:29,068 So we've been in Burley, Idaho, visiting Christine's brothers. 98 00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:30,793 -Good morning. -[Janelle] Hey, this is beautiful. 99 00:05:30,793 --> 00:05:32,103 How you guys doing? 100 00:05:32,103 --> 00:05:33,517 [Janelle] Today we decided we were going to go on a hike at 101 00:05:33,517 --> 00:05:35,068 the City of Rocks National Preserve. 102 00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,793 It's supposedly this really cool area 103 00:05:36,793 --> 00:05:38,586 with a lot of rocks and good hiking. 104 00:05:38,586 --> 00:05:43,103 [Christine] Steve is from my bio mom, and then Levi is from my other mom. 105 00:05:43,103 --> 00:05:45,379 We also have Jacey, Levi's wife. 106 00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:48,482 Jacey's mom Kerina's coming, and one of their sons 107 00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:51,172 doesn't have school today. And we're just going to go hang out 108 00:05:51,172 --> 00:05:52,275 and go for a little hike. 109 00:05:52,275 --> 00:05:55,379 -Janelle, we need a picture here. -I know, wow. 110 00:05:55,379 --> 00:05:57,586 A couple years ago, I left Kody. 111 00:05:57,586 --> 00:05:59,689 Janelle's separated from Kody right now. 112 00:05:59,689 --> 00:06:03,000 But we are sister wives, and we're just going to keep on 113 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:06,000 being sister wives and really good friends for the rest of our lives 114 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:08,517 and keep raising our kids together 115 00:06:08,517 --> 00:06:12,172 and just represent the plural part of our family. 116 00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:13,689 It's interesting that Christine and Janelle 117 00:06:13,689 --> 00:06:17,000 have a newfound relationship, because I think it was 118 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,827 more antagonistic before. 119 00:06:18,827 --> 00:06:21,896 I wish it wasn't so, but it seems to me that 120 00:06:21,896 --> 00:06:25,172 they are united in a common enemy 121 00:06:25,172 --> 00:06:28,586 against me and Robyn, because they've got 122 00:06:28,586 --> 00:06:30,793 nothing good to say about us. 123 00:06:30,793 --> 00:06:32,275 [Christine] Just so you guys know, in Janelle's mind, 124 00:06:32,275 --> 00:06:33,482 she's naming all of these plants. 125 00:06:33,482 --> 00:06:34,724 She's like, that's blah, blah, blah. 126 00:06:34,724 --> 00:06:35,793 -That's blah, blah, blah. -She is. 127 00:06:35,793 --> 00:06:37,482 -You are, aren't you? -[Janelle] Oh, yeah. 128 00:06:37,482 --> 00:06:40,068 When Christine and I started, you know, getting to know each other, 129 00:06:40,068 --> 00:06:41,793 I got to know her brothers a little bit. 130 00:06:41,793 --> 00:06:44,103 I've known them since they were teenagers. 131 00:06:44,103 --> 00:06:46,379 You know, prior to Christine and I breaking up, 132 00:06:46,379 --> 00:06:48,689 I would have called them my friends. 133 00:06:48,689 --> 00:06:50,689 So my brothers and I haven't really talked about 134 00:06:50,689 --> 00:06:52,482 my divorce at all with Kody. 135 00:06:52,482 --> 00:06:54,275 So I know they have a lot of questions. 136 00:06:54,275 --> 00:06:55,793 I don't know when it's going to happen, 137 00:06:55,793 --> 00:06:57,172 you know, on the hike or later today. 138 00:06:57,172 --> 00:06:58,689 I'm not sure. 139 00:06:58,689 --> 00:07:01,413 But I know that they've got some things they want to talk to me about. 140 00:07:01,413 --> 00:07:03,000 So you just went back to school. 141 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,413 Do you do a lot of it online or do you go in person? 142 00:07:05,413 --> 00:07:07,206 It's actually all online. 143 00:07:07,206 --> 00:07:10,275 This is Levi's mother-in-law, Kerina. 144 00:07:10,275 --> 00:07:12,896 And I had no idea she was going back to school. 145 00:07:12,896 --> 00:07:13,896 I think it's great. 146 00:07:13,896 --> 00:07:15,689 So Janelle did, too, when the kids were... 147 00:07:15,689 --> 00:07:17,103 Well, when my kids were little, though. 148 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,000 No, when your kids were little, 149 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,000 you, like, you went back to school. 150 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,379 It was amazing. It was super cool. 151 00:07:20,379 --> 00:07:22,000 -Your kids were so... -I was desperate. 152 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,689 Your kids were proud of you. 153 00:07:23,689 --> 00:07:26,068 When Gabe was a baby, I decided that I needed 154 00:07:26,068 --> 00:07:27,517 to complete my college degree. 155 00:07:27,517 --> 00:07:30,586 So back then, online universities were just becoming a thing. 156 00:07:30,586 --> 00:07:32,000 I would work full-time. 157 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,586 Kody was only there, like, every third day or whatever. 158 00:07:34,586 --> 00:07:37,172 And I had all these kids, so I'd put them to bed 159 00:07:37,172 --> 00:07:38,620 and I'd work at night. 160 00:07:38,620 --> 00:07:40,310 I was 33 when I graduated. 161 00:07:40,310 --> 00:07:42,310 Now I think about it, I'm like, oh my word, 162 00:07:42,310 --> 00:07:44,482 -I don't know how I did that. -I don't know how you did it either. 163 00:07:44,482 --> 00:07:46,620 It's a lot of work with not having to deal with kids, too. 164 00:07:46,620 --> 00:07:47,724 Yeah. 165 00:07:47,724 --> 00:07:49,793 I admire Janelle for going back to school with kids. 166 00:07:49,793 --> 00:07:51,413 It was a lot of work. 167 00:07:51,413 --> 00:07:52,620 I mean, I helped her out. 168 00:07:52,620 --> 00:07:55,068 I babysat the kids for her and helped her when I could. 169 00:07:55,068 --> 00:07:56,586 It's amazing still. 170 00:07:56,586 --> 00:08:00,379 When I was younger, oh my gosh, 171 00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:02,931 our group was teaching that the world was going to end. 172 00:08:02,931 --> 00:08:04,896 -So don't get your college education. -Yeah. 173 00:08:04,896 --> 00:08:07,000 -Yeah... -All women need to do is get married. 174 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,068 The world's going to end. 175 00:08:08,068 --> 00:08:09,724 There were different classes and church meetings 176 00:08:09,724 --> 00:08:12,103 we went to where some of the people would teach 177 00:08:12,103 --> 00:08:13,931 that the world was going to end. 178 00:08:13,931 --> 00:08:16,482 And I remember talking to my dad about it, and he was like, 179 00:08:16,482 --> 00:08:19,482 "Oh, Chris, that's not true. That's crazy. 180 00:08:19,482 --> 00:08:21,689 You got to go to college." I'm like, "Oh, all right." 181 00:08:21,689 --> 00:08:22,896 So I went to college. 182 00:08:22,896 --> 00:08:24,586 -Yeah, any time anything happened -Yes. 183 00:08:24,586 --> 00:08:27,103 -in the world at all, like any sort of crisis, -Yes. Yes. 184 00:08:27,103 --> 00:08:28,793 it was like, the world is ending right now. 185 00:08:28,793 --> 00:08:30,379 [Steve] But it's funny, because there's this paradox, too, 186 00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:32,309 where they want to be super prepared. 187 00:08:32,309 --> 00:08:33,724 They want to be, you know, we give you food storage. 188 00:08:33,724 --> 00:08:35,000 You have to know, I grew up, no, look, 189 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,586 I grew up in the mainstream LDS church. 190 00:08:36,586 --> 00:08:37,586 That was a big deal. 191 00:08:37,586 --> 00:08:39,827 So that was the same thing in LDS church, too? 192 00:08:39,827 --> 00:08:41,482 Food storage, yeah. 193 00:08:41,482 --> 00:08:44,000 But hey, during COVID, who had toilet paper? 194 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,931 -[all laughing] -This girl. 195 00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:49,482 Our church was always encouraging us to have food storage. 196 00:08:49,482 --> 00:08:51,689 And I'm not talking about small amounts. 197 00:08:51,689 --> 00:08:55,586 I'm talking about like, yeah, like enough for a very long time 198 00:08:55,586 --> 00:08:57,724 for a large family kind of a thing. 199 00:08:57,724 --> 00:08:59,517 [Kody] So when we buy meat, we buy it in bulk, 200 00:08:59,517 --> 00:09:02,793 and we buy a whole cow, and they send it to the butcher, 201 00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:07,000 and they package it, and we bring it here frozen, 202 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:09,172 and then we stuff it into our freezers. 203 00:09:09,172 --> 00:09:12,586 -600 pounds of meat. -That's a lot of meat. 204 00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:14,068 Yeah, we got a little bit of food storage. 205 00:09:14,068 --> 00:09:18,172 When Christine left, we were storing it all in Christine's garage. 206 00:09:18,172 --> 00:09:20,482 When she left, she didn't want any of it, 207 00:09:20,482 --> 00:09:22,482 so we got our food storage put away. 208 00:09:22,482 --> 00:09:24,172 It's in storage, but it's costing us money 209 00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:26,172 every month to store it. It's taking up space 210 00:09:26,172 --> 00:09:29,172 that I don't feel like I can spare. 211 00:09:29,172 --> 00:09:31,620 I see the wisdom in it, because you just never know 212 00:09:31,620 --> 00:09:33,689 what's gonna happen, but it's not really something 213 00:09:33,689 --> 00:09:36,000 that I've completely embraced. 214 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,586 That was something that Janelle and Christine always did, 215 00:09:38,586 --> 00:09:40,517 and I just left it up to them. 216 00:09:40,517 --> 00:09:43,103 You guys can check out, like, from right here. 217 00:09:43,103 --> 00:09:45,379 You guys can see clear back over there. 218 00:09:45,379 --> 00:09:46,896 [Janelle] Wow! 219 00:09:46,896 --> 00:09:49,310 We could do a family reunion here, because Christine and I 220 00:09:49,310 --> 00:09:51,793 have talked about doing a reunion with our kids. 221 00:09:51,793 --> 00:09:54,896 Like, all the kids, to get them all in the same space again, 222 00:09:54,896 --> 00:09:58,206 I think that would be a feat. 223 00:09:58,206 --> 00:10:00,172 You know, it just, for some reason, 224 00:10:00,172 --> 00:10:03,103 feels like there's this huge gulf between Robyn's children 225 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,275 and the rest of the children. 226 00:10:05,275 --> 00:10:08,827 And I hear from my children and Christine's children, 227 00:10:08,827 --> 00:10:12,379 whenever I'm with them, that they miss Robyn's children. 228 00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:16,000 They miss Dayton. My boys especially really do miss Dayton. 229 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:19,000 You know, I don't know. Like, it's become so estranged 230 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:20,793 and so bitter, and there's things 231 00:10:20,793 --> 00:10:23,068 being said now, and I just don't know 232 00:10:23,482 --> 00:10:24,793 if it'll ever happen. 233 00:10:31,793 --> 00:10:35,000 I am willing to fake being in love with Meri. 234 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,965 I don't want to, but if you're going to insist. 235 00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:45,172 [voice breaking] I wanted to sit on a porch with my sister wives. 236 00:10:46,482 --> 00:10:48,862 [sobs] I don't understand. 237 00:10:56,206 --> 00:10:57,931 [dramatic music playing] 238 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,793 [Kody] Me, Meri, and Robyn are going to sit down 239 00:11:04,793 --> 00:11:06,896 and talk about the property. 240 00:11:06,896 --> 00:11:09,103 Whose property is what? You know, just reaffirming 241 00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:11,068 sort of the division and stuff like that. 242 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:18,793 You know, after Kody and I talked on our anniversaries 243 00:11:18,793 --> 00:11:22,689 about six months ago, we haven't seen each other much. 244 00:11:22,689 --> 00:11:26,034 I think that he basically said what he needed to say. 245 00:11:27,379 --> 00:11:30,931 Every time I'm out here on the property, it makes me ache, 246 00:11:30,931 --> 00:11:33,931 ache, ache, ache to just get out here. 247 00:11:33,931 --> 00:11:36,586 Well, Meri, since you want to build on the property, 248 00:11:36,586 --> 00:11:38,379 we should go walk it. 249 00:11:38,379 --> 00:11:40,000 You're skipping a conversation. 250 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,896 There's quite a few conversations 251 00:11:41,896 --> 00:11:43,379 -that are being skipped here. -[laughing] 252 00:11:43,379 --> 00:11:46,758 One, the property has to be paid off. 253 00:11:46,758 --> 00:11:49,758 Two, the property has to be divided. 254 00:11:49,758 --> 00:11:53,172 After Christine left, I guess she signed over 255 00:11:53,172 --> 00:11:56,793 her property to Kody and Robyn. 256 00:11:56,793 --> 00:11:59,310 And I don't know what's happening with that. 257 00:11:59,310 --> 00:12:03,586 I haven't been involved in the decision-making process of it. 258 00:12:03,586 --> 00:12:05,068 So when Christine got her house, 259 00:12:05,068 --> 00:12:07,862 when she left, she said, well, I'll trade that 260 00:12:07,862 --> 00:12:11,896 with you for my share in Coyote Pass. 261 00:12:11,896 --> 00:12:13,103 So here's the deal. 262 00:12:13,103 --> 00:12:15,379 -We're still doing five lots, okay? -[Meri] Okay. 263 00:12:15,379 --> 00:12:17,000 Christine's just out. 264 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:20,413 -And who gets the other one? -So-- Me. 265 00:12:20,413 --> 00:12:23,379 Lot one is the lot that I kind of always figured 266 00:12:23,379 --> 00:12:25,137 would sort of be the family lot. 267 00:12:25,517 --> 00:12:26,793 And Christine left. 268 00:12:26,793 --> 00:12:28,137 She's gone. 269 00:12:28,137 --> 00:12:31,000 So I'll own lot number three, which was going to be her lot. 270 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,379 Because of things that have gone on in the past with 271 00:12:33,379 --> 00:12:37,586 the family, I'm not going to give the family lot to any wife. 272 00:12:38,793 --> 00:12:40,758 Okay, so you get four. Robyn gets four. 273 00:12:40,758 --> 00:12:43,413 -So you guys get eight together. -No. 274 00:12:43,413 --> 00:12:46,000 -It's two acre lots. -[Meri] Yeah. 275 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,310 -Two acre lots. -[Meri] Yeah, so. 276 00:12:47,310 --> 00:12:48,586 And then four acre lots. 277 00:12:48,586 --> 00:12:52,103 Right, so if you're getting two and two, that's four. 278 00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:54,310 It seems like he's already made the decision, 279 00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:56,103 and I don't think that's fair. 280 00:12:56,103 --> 00:12:58,793 Because regardless of the fact that he and I haven't had 281 00:12:58,793 --> 00:13:01,758 a relationship for, you know, eight or 10 years 282 00:13:01,758 --> 00:13:04,275 or however long it's been, I'm still part of the family, 283 00:13:04,275 --> 00:13:06,379 and I still financially put into it. 284 00:13:06,379 --> 00:13:10,172 And so I deserve to have some of the property 285 00:13:10,172 --> 00:13:14,034 and not just what he decides I'm worthy of. 286 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,344 This is just weird to me. 287 00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,413 You two get eight together, four and four. 288 00:13:20,413 --> 00:13:23,379 Janelle gets four, and I get two. 289 00:13:23,379 --> 00:13:27,000 You know, I have said to Kody several times, well, 290 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,689 I'm not really quite sure how come 291 00:13:30,689 --> 00:13:32,275 we're not dividing this equally. 292 00:13:32,275 --> 00:13:33,689 You know what I mean? "Well, he's like, well, 293 00:13:33,689 --> 00:13:35,793 you're going to still get your four acres." 294 00:13:35,793 --> 00:13:39,896 And I'm like, "Okay, but there's 14 acres." 295 00:13:39,896 --> 00:13:42,172 Like, I think it's time that we have a real appraisal 296 00:13:42,172 --> 00:13:45,103 and decide what the value is and what's fair 297 00:13:45,103 --> 00:13:46,758 for all four of us. 298 00:13:46,758 --> 00:13:50,103 Meri has one child, and I have 18 children. 299 00:13:50,103 --> 00:13:54,931 And I wanted to keep the lot with the pond 300 00:13:54,931 --> 00:13:56,896 to be for the whole family. 301 00:13:56,896 --> 00:13:58,413 Because the whole family kind of understands 302 00:13:58,413 --> 00:14:01,379 that Meri doesn't want to really, you know, this is from living with her. 303 00:14:01,379 --> 00:14:03,689 She doesn't really want to share resources. 304 00:14:03,689 --> 00:14:09,103 The other thing is that you never know if Kody and I 305 00:14:09,103 --> 00:14:10,517 are gonna stay together. 306 00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,517 -I mean... -You never know. 307 00:14:12,517 --> 00:14:13,758 It's gonna happen. 308 00:14:13,758 --> 00:14:16,000 [Meri] Another 22 years down the road. 309 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,793 [Robyn] That was a bad joke, Kody. 310 00:14:17,793 --> 00:14:19,275 Sorry. Sorry. 311 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:20,896 What do you think of a comeback? 312 00:14:20,896 --> 00:14:22,413 [Robyn] No, I'm just saying, like, here's the thing. 313 00:14:22,413 --> 00:14:24,793 -No, this is... -10 years in, 12 years in, 314 00:14:24,793 --> 00:14:26,103 I wouldn't have thought either. 315 00:14:26,103 --> 00:14:27,482 That was a bad joke. Sorry, sweetheart. 316 00:14:27,482 --> 00:14:29,241 I'm sorry. I apologize. 317 00:14:31,172 --> 00:14:32,896 We have no idea what the future holds. 318 00:14:32,896 --> 00:14:35,275 I'm not saying that Kody and I are gonna really split up, 319 00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:38,620 but, I mean, it's just like, I deserve my fourth two, 320 00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:41,586 is what my point is, not to be counted with Kody. 321 00:14:41,586 --> 00:14:44,482 I actually get tired of that, to constantly 322 00:14:44,482 --> 00:14:45,758 always be counted with Kody, 323 00:14:45,758 --> 00:14:50,206 and, like, everybody always thinks that if Kody has it, 324 00:14:50,206 --> 00:14:52,310 Robyn has it. Kody says it, Robyn says it. 325 00:14:52,310 --> 00:14:54,482 Kody thinks it and feels it, Robyn thinks and feels it. 326 00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:55,689 That is not true. 327 00:14:56,310 --> 00:15:03,172 No, my point is that my lot 328 00:15:03,172 --> 00:15:07,103 will eventually be passed down 329 00:15:07,103 --> 00:15:07,896 to my children. 330 00:15:07,896 --> 00:15:09,517 Well, that's for you. Right. 331 00:15:09,517 --> 00:15:12,172 -I get it. -His lots will be more about 332 00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:14,413 the more of the children. 333 00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:16,517 That's how I see it. Is that how you see it? 334 00:15:16,517 --> 00:15:18,103 -Not really, but... -Really? 335 00:15:18,103 --> 00:15:19,068 No. 336 00:15:19,793 --> 00:15:21,137 How do you see it? 337 00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:25,068 -I see... -No, no, no, no. 338 00:15:25,068 --> 00:15:28,379 You don't answer right now because you're in a headspace 339 00:15:28,379 --> 00:15:29,896 -that's not cool. -Yeah, I know. 340 00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:33,000 -You're in a bad place right now. No. -Oh, I know, I just-- 341 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,896 I don't see... I'm not making any plans. 342 00:15:35,896 --> 00:15:37,758 [Robyn] Well, that's how I see it. 343 00:15:38,620 --> 00:15:42,103 That's how I see it and you just need to wait 344 00:15:42,103 --> 00:15:45,103 until you've got your headspace clear and clean 345 00:15:45,103 --> 00:15:47,931 and calm before you say anything else. 346 00:15:49,172 --> 00:15:52,000 There's just... There's way more 347 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:55,379 to the picture that... Why discuss? 348 00:15:55,379 --> 00:15:57,413 It's all speculation at this point. 349 00:15:57,413 --> 00:15:59,379 It's constantly changing. 350 00:16:00,275 --> 00:16:03,310 And we are constantly changing. 351 00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:06,172 And who's to say that I don't just get fed up with 352 00:16:06,172 --> 00:16:07,482 all of this myself and just go, 353 00:16:07,482 --> 00:16:10,413 "I want to move out of Flagstaff." 354 00:16:10,413 --> 00:16:14,103 I don't think I will, but anybody, any one of us 355 00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:17,275 could do that, just like Christine did. 356 00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:19,379 What would you think would be different? 357 00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:21,172 What were you imagining would be different? 358 00:16:21,172 --> 00:16:23,793 No, I just wasn't really imagining anything. 359 00:16:23,793 --> 00:16:26,241 I just knew that there was now two more acres. 360 00:16:27,103 --> 00:16:30,517 And so does that mean, like, I get them 361 00:16:30,517 --> 00:16:34,241 because Robyn and Janelle each have four? 362 00:16:35,206 --> 00:16:38,137 -I'm not thinking that. -Okay. [laughs] 363 00:16:38,793 --> 00:16:40,068 I understand. 364 00:16:42,172 --> 00:16:43,448 I understand. 365 00:16:44,275 --> 00:16:46,275 Oh, I understand what he's saying. 366 00:16:46,689 --> 00:16:47,862 [chuckles] 367 00:16:49,758 --> 00:16:54,689 It's just the same thing that's always... been. 368 00:16:55,103 --> 00:16:57,965 I only have one child. 369 00:16:58,931 --> 00:17:02,137 And now it's, but I'm not really a wife. 370 00:17:03,103 --> 00:17:04,000 You know what I mean? 371 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:07,931 And so it's just this, you're less than. 372 00:17:07,931 --> 00:17:10,378 And that's not true. 373 00:17:10,378 --> 00:17:12,448 I'm just as important as anybody else. 374 00:17:13,586 --> 00:17:15,137 So yeah, I understand. 375 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,448 Also, is now a good time to drop a bomb? 376 00:17:21,103 --> 00:17:22,413 What's the bomb? 377 00:17:22,413 --> 00:17:23,689 [Robyn sighs] 378 00:17:23,689 --> 00:17:26,448 My heart just started pounding hard. 379 00:17:27,586 --> 00:17:29,068 [dramatic music playing] 380 00:17:36,965 --> 00:17:38,241 [upbeat music playing] 381 00:17:41,586 --> 00:17:43,275 We have a barbecue at Levi's house now. 382 00:17:43,275 --> 00:17:44,586 This is the last thing we're gonna do with him. 383 00:17:44,586 --> 00:17:47,068 And, oh, my gosh, it's just been a fun couple of days. 384 00:17:48,689 --> 00:17:50,862 That's how I would throw. 385 00:17:50,862 --> 00:17:52,275 We're playing Ultimate Frisbee. 386 00:17:52,275 --> 00:17:54,793 Now, what I want to do is lay it up right over the top, 387 00:17:54,793 --> 00:17:56,241 and you're just gonna be right behind it 388 00:17:56,241 --> 00:17:57,379 like a backboard and dunk it down. 389 00:17:57,379 --> 00:17:58,482 -Okay. -That's three points. 390 00:17:58,482 --> 00:18:01,000 It'll be me and Chris against Matthew and Janelle. 391 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:02,241 Oh, no, no, I promise. 392 00:18:02,241 --> 00:18:04,137 -He doesn't want to be on my team. -We'll help each other. 393 00:18:04,137 --> 00:18:05,758 -Doesn't matter. -You're gonna be just fine. 394 00:18:05,758 --> 00:18:07,586 Between Meri and Robyn and Janelle, 395 00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:09,586 I am definitely the most competitive. 396 00:18:09,586 --> 00:18:13,862 That is why I left first, is because I wanted to win. [laughs] 397 00:18:16,275 --> 00:18:18,724 -[Levi] Yeah! That's how you do it. -Nice. 398 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:20,965 Nice! 399 00:18:21,482 --> 00:18:22,931 Oh. 400 00:18:22,931 --> 00:18:25,000 [Janelle] I have thrown a frisbee, like, four times in my life. 401 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,000 Like, it would just go wherever it wanted to. 402 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,689 Oh, gosh! Can I please do it again? 403 00:18:29,689 --> 00:18:31,103 Please, please, please, please. 404 00:18:31,103 --> 00:18:33,379 Think if we split Janelle and I, we'd split the difference, 405 00:18:33,379 --> 00:18:35,379 we might actually make it super close 406 00:18:35,379 --> 00:18:36,896 to one of the goals. 407 00:18:36,896 --> 00:18:38,896 Okay, I have got to get this, damn it. 408 00:18:38,896 --> 00:18:39,689 Okay. 409 00:18:39,689 --> 00:18:41,862 I was asking for divine intervention. 410 00:18:42,551 --> 00:18:44,689 Oh, see, that was the wind. 411 00:18:44,689 --> 00:18:45,931 But I did not get it. 412 00:18:51,758 --> 00:18:53,586 -Oh, that's game. Nice hit. -I hit it. 413 00:18:53,586 --> 00:18:55,551 -That's two points, right? -Yeah. 414 00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:58,379 -See, I told you, but I won it for you. -Oh, my gosh. 415 00:18:58,379 --> 00:19:01,482 Yeah, thank goodness for Matt, because it wasn't me who won this game. 416 00:19:01,482 --> 00:19:02,827 It was really him. 417 00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:05,172 [upbeat music playing] 418 00:19:08,965 --> 00:19:10,586 I was really glad that we came up here, 419 00:19:10,586 --> 00:19:13,586 'cause Christine has always told me stories about her family. 420 00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:16,586 But this was a really good chance to get to know them. 421 00:19:16,586 --> 00:19:18,586 And they're awesome. 422 00:19:18,586 --> 00:19:20,689 [Levi] I have so many more questions we'll have to discuss. 423 00:19:20,689 --> 00:19:23,586 You said in the last few years you kind of had your moment 424 00:19:23,586 --> 00:19:26,241 realizing that maybe you did need to move away. 425 00:19:26,241 --> 00:19:28,689 -What happened in the last few years? -Um... 426 00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:30,000 No, we're direct people. 427 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,000 We're very, very, very direct. 428 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,172 Levi was raised by the same parents I was, 429 00:19:34,172 --> 00:19:38,241 and I think we both just have a tendency to go in for the conversation. 430 00:19:39,275 --> 00:19:41,275 -Well, Kody and I had... -[Steve] We're gonna hit you with 431 00:19:41,275 --> 00:19:43,034 the hard questions, sweetie. I'm sorry. 432 00:19:43,034 --> 00:19:45,000 Well, this is kind of life, Steve. 433 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:48,344 So he just said that, um, he wasn't attracted to me, 434 00:19:48,344 --> 00:19:50,241 and there was no real chemistry, 435 00:19:50,241 --> 00:19:52,448 and it wasn't gonna be, and I wasn't nice enough 436 00:19:52,448 --> 00:19:54,172 to my sister wives. 437 00:19:54,172 --> 00:19:56,275 Christine and I both know that that's a code word 438 00:19:56,275 --> 00:19:57,551 for, you weren't nice to Robyn. 439 00:19:57,551 --> 00:19:59,448 -You were nice to me. -I was nice to you. 440 00:19:59,448 --> 00:20:00,793 [laughs] 441 00:20:00,793 --> 00:20:03,241 I used to hear all these crazy stories, like, Kody 442 00:20:03,241 --> 00:20:05,862 really believed that Christine was being so mean. 443 00:20:05,862 --> 00:20:08,758 And I don't think Christine really was. 444 00:20:08,758 --> 00:20:11,137 I mean, like, he's basically accused me that my boys, 445 00:20:11,137 --> 00:20:13,862 especially, have been so mean to this one person 446 00:20:13,862 --> 00:20:16,172 who's given everything to this family. 447 00:20:16,172 --> 00:20:19,965 I think that's a pretty one-sided view of this situation. 448 00:20:19,965 --> 00:20:23,000 And then it came out that he never was really attracted to me 449 00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:26,034 -or anything like that. -I don't believe that. 450 00:20:26,034 --> 00:20:28,896 Look, she and I have discussed this, but it feels like such 451 00:20:28,896 --> 00:20:30,172 a public venue to be talking about 452 00:20:30,172 --> 00:20:31,551 this in front of all of us. 453 00:20:31,551 --> 00:20:34,344 So I'm just feeling a little awkward. [laughs] 454 00:20:34,344 --> 00:20:37,689 But before all of that, anyway, he told me 455 00:20:37,689 --> 00:20:40,586 he wanted me to get his name off of the house. 456 00:20:40,586 --> 00:20:43,000 He wanted to just finance a house with Robyn 457 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:46,000 and he didn't want to be part of my house on paperwork. 458 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:48,689 So that kind of was like, it was hard. 459 00:20:48,689 --> 00:20:52,034 That hurt so bad because we were on a house together. 460 00:20:52,034 --> 00:20:53,482 Finally, we had something in our name 461 00:20:53,482 --> 00:20:56,344 that was combined and we'd never really had that before, 462 00:20:56,344 --> 00:20:58,172 and I thought it was super, super special. 463 00:20:58,172 --> 00:21:01,172 Me refinancing the house and giving it to Christine 464 00:21:01,172 --> 00:21:03,655 had nothing to do with us breaking up. 465 00:21:03,655 --> 00:21:06,482 Our breakup wasn't even on the horizon. 466 00:21:06,482 --> 00:21:08,379 I never even saw it coming. 467 00:21:08,379 --> 00:21:11,068 I'd paid every payment on the house anyway. 468 00:21:11,068 --> 00:21:12,862 It's not like he ever did anything. 469 00:21:12,862 --> 00:21:15,379 But it was one of those final steps that was 470 00:21:15,379 --> 00:21:18,000 so hard, so hard. 471 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:19,689 Um... 472 00:21:19,689 --> 00:21:22,103 But it made it easily financially in the end. 473 00:21:22,103 --> 00:21:24,448 You know, Kody and I talked about what to do with the property 474 00:21:24,448 --> 00:21:26,655 and my house before I left. 475 00:21:26,655 --> 00:21:28,689 So I was like, why don't I keep all of the money 476 00:21:28,689 --> 00:21:30,965 from the proceeds of the sale of my house, 477 00:21:30,965 --> 00:21:34,689 and then I'll turn the property back over to the family. 478 00:21:34,689 --> 00:21:38,482 So financial-wise, it was very easy for me to walk away. 479 00:21:38,482 --> 00:21:40,379 I mean, I believe that's the biggest reason why 480 00:21:40,379 --> 00:21:42,896 Janelle is staying with Kody, is because 481 00:21:42,896 --> 00:21:46,000 she has nothing in her name. 482 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:49,482 And the property, Kody's name is on every piece of property. 483 00:21:49,482 --> 00:21:51,689 I don't know if Robyn's is on every piece, 484 00:21:51,689 --> 00:21:55,068 but Robyn's name was also on my piece of property. 485 00:21:55,068 --> 00:21:58,068 So I'm stuck here with really nothing that's free and clear 486 00:21:58,068 --> 00:22:00,379 in my name. I'm jointly titled on these pieces 487 00:22:00,379 --> 00:22:02,103 with other members of the family. 488 00:22:02,103 --> 00:22:05,000 We all have the same problem that Janelle has, 489 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,586 is that our assets are all combined. 490 00:22:07,586 --> 00:22:11,551 From the day that I asked him to not stay there anymore, 491 00:22:11,551 --> 00:22:15,586 I took my life back, and I got it back. 492 00:22:15,586 --> 00:22:18,172 And I became stronger that day. 493 00:22:18,172 --> 00:22:20,034 This conversation just isn't for my brothers. 494 00:22:20,034 --> 00:22:21,448 It's for Janelle, too. 495 00:22:21,448 --> 00:22:23,862 I'm not saying that Janelle has to follow the same path. 496 00:22:23,862 --> 00:22:26,965 She has a way different situation than mine. 497 00:22:27,896 --> 00:22:30,862 But she needs to know it is okay on the other side. 498 00:22:30,862 --> 00:22:34,172 I don't know, like, life is too, life is short. 499 00:22:34,172 --> 00:22:35,448 Yeah. 500 00:22:35,448 --> 00:22:37,551 You know, and I mean, I raised, you know, we were raised in 501 00:22:37,551 --> 00:22:40,068 a culture where divorce or marriage is forever, right? 502 00:22:40,068 --> 00:22:42,862 So that's, it's been a harder thing to like reconcile, 503 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:45,482 but like, I think, I mean, we're 50. 504 00:22:45,482 --> 00:22:47,551 That's, we still have a long time. 505 00:22:47,551 --> 00:22:49,344 Because I still... 506 00:22:50,482 --> 00:22:51,551 have my faith. 507 00:22:51,551 --> 00:22:53,862 Like, I'm still spiritually married to Kody. 508 00:22:53,862 --> 00:22:56,689 Like, I don't know how to get a divorce that way. 509 00:22:56,689 --> 00:22:59,000 So I'm still technically married to him, 510 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:00,344 but I don't want to live with him. 511 00:23:00,344 --> 00:23:02,896 I don't want to get back together with him. 512 00:23:02,896 --> 00:23:06,241 Some of the kids have wondered if I really have left their dad 513 00:23:06,241 --> 00:23:09,862 because I'm not out dating or, you know, moving on. 514 00:23:09,862 --> 00:23:12,896 And it's just because I don't really know how 515 00:23:12,896 --> 00:23:16,758 to reconcile my faith with where I am now in my life. 516 00:23:16,758 --> 00:23:18,896 So I'm not in any hurry. 517 00:23:18,896 --> 00:23:20,517 Just going to wait and see how it works out. 518 00:23:26,448 --> 00:23:30,000 This is the agreement you required of me 519 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:31,965 in order to get married. 520 00:23:32,793 --> 00:23:35,000 Our sacred covenant. 521 00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,896 In so many ways, this moment is just about what we each want. 522 00:23:39,896 --> 00:23:41,551 And those aren't the same things. 523 00:23:45,689 --> 00:23:47,310 [upbeat music playing] 524 00:23:50,448 --> 00:23:52,482 I wasn't even planning on talking about this, 525 00:23:52,482 --> 00:23:55,310 but I guess here we are. Um... 526 00:23:57,379 --> 00:24:01,551 I was up at the bed and breakfast this past weekend, 527 00:24:02,448 --> 00:24:04,000 and... 528 00:24:06,137 --> 00:24:07,655 it needs me. 529 00:24:10,655 --> 00:24:14,758 I don't know if it's because mom is gone, 530 00:24:14,758 --> 00:24:19,000 but there's an empty feeling, and I'm feeling very, 531 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,344 very drawn to being there. 532 00:24:23,137 --> 00:24:24,689 What does that mean, Meri? 533 00:24:24,689 --> 00:24:30,241 So it means, and it's all coupled with everything else 534 00:24:30,241 --> 00:24:31,896 that's been going on and the statements 535 00:24:31,896 --> 00:24:33,758 that Kody has made to me this year, 536 00:24:35,275 --> 00:24:39,137 that I probably won't be renewing my lease here. 537 00:24:42,137 --> 00:24:45,482 I'm not saying anything about this property 538 00:24:45,482 --> 00:24:51,034 because my intention has always been to build here. 539 00:24:53,655 --> 00:24:58,241 And then just, it's like a temporary sort of situation. 540 00:24:58,241 --> 00:24:59,344 I don't know. 541 00:25:01,275 --> 00:25:02,241 Okay. 542 00:25:03,344 --> 00:25:04,413 [sighs] 543 00:25:04,896 --> 00:25:06,068 [sniffles] 544 00:25:08,896 --> 00:25:12,724 Meri is saying that she needs to move. 545 00:25:14,586 --> 00:25:18,034 Despite the fact that I just feel like my world 546 00:25:18,034 --> 00:25:19,620 is crumbling down, 547 00:25:20,586 --> 00:25:23,275 I can't... 548 00:25:23,275 --> 00:25:24,965 fight it, 549 00:25:25,862 --> 00:25:27,931 because it's not fair to Meri. 550 00:25:28,275 --> 00:25:29,379 [scoffs] 551 00:25:29,379 --> 00:25:32,482 What I really want to do is yell. 552 00:25:32,482 --> 00:25:34,724 What I really want to do is scream. 553 00:25:36,448 --> 00:25:40,000 What I really wanna do is just say, 554 00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:42,758 "No, please don't do this." 555 00:25:44,655 --> 00:25:47,689 I'm not gonna apologize for what I know in my heart 556 00:25:47,689 --> 00:25:49,689 is what I need to do. 557 00:25:49,689 --> 00:25:52,275 If it's gonna hurt Robyn's feelings, 558 00:25:52,275 --> 00:25:54,379 if Kody's gonna be jumping for joy, 559 00:25:54,379 --> 00:25:58,000 whatever the emotion that somebody else 560 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:01,034 has about it is irrelevant. 561 00:26:06,586 --> 00:26:09,000 Do you even want to look at the lot, Meri? 562 00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:10,896 Or is it just off your radar temporarily? 563 00:26:10,896 --> 00:26:12,344 It's not off my radar. 564 00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:18,034 It's not off my radar at all. It's just so different. 565 00:26:18,586 --> 00:26:20,137 How do you mean? 566 00:26:20,137 --> 00:26:22,275 Like, just so that I understand. 567 00:26:22,275 --> 00:26:25,206 Things that you've said to me and about me this year. 568 00:26:27,586 --> 00:26:31,655 -It changes things. -You're making about what I said. 569 00:26:32,862 --> 00:26:35,275 Why can't we get on the page where we're making about 570 00:26:35,275 --> 00:26:38,000 where we are instead about what I say? 571 00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,103 So a couple of days ago, Kody and I had had 572 00:26:41,103 --> 00:26:43,689 this discussion about where our marriage was 573 00:26:43,689 --> 00:26:46,034 and that it really was not going to move forward. 574 00:26:46,034 --> 00:26:48,000 But the thing is, every conversation that 575 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:50,551 he and I have had about it has been private. 576 00:26:50,551 --> 00:26:52,586 It's just been between me and him 577 00:26:52,586 --> 00:26:58,000 and he actually has said that he did not want it to be public. 578 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:00,068 And I don't think that's fair, because I think 579 00:27:00,068 --> 00:27:02,586 it's important that it's public. 580 00:27:02,586 --> 00:27:04,965 And I think it's important that Robyn hears it. 581 00:27:04,965 --> 00:27:07,172 No, I feel like Kody and I are in a good place. 582 00:27:07,172 --> 00:27:09,689 He was over the other day. We had a good conversation. 583 00:27:09,689 --> 00:27:14,689 But I feel like he's not as in a good of a place. 584 00:27:14,689 --> 00:27:17,137 And I don't know if it's me or if it's something else going on. 585 00:27:17,137 --> 00:27:18,482 It's blame. 586 00:27:18,482 --> 00:27:20,379 I'm not meaning to blame you, Kody. 587 00:27:20,379 --> 00:27:22,137 Then just don't. 588 00:27:22,137 --> 00:27:26,137 Her and I, a day or two ago, just had a discussion. 589 00:27:26,137 --> 00:27:28,000 And it was kind of one of these things, are we going 590 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,551 to work this out, is what Meri's kind of always asking. 591 00:27:30,551 --> 00:27:34,551 I'm like, Meri, romance for you and I 592 00:27:34,551 --> 00:27:36,689 is not in this picture. 593 00:27:36,689 --> 00:27:39,344 Felt like we had decided that we're just going to have to go on 594 00:27:39,344 --> 00:27:43,241 being friends because we're not going to be in a marriage. 595 00:27:43,241 --> 00:27:46,793 That's what I thought we had literally agreed to. 596 00:27:46,793 --> 00:27:50,068 Kody, I loved the conversation when you stopped by my house 597 00:27:50,068 --> 00:27:52,862 -the other day and we talked for like an hour. -Okay. 598 00:27:52,862 --> 00:27:54,689 Like, it was a good conversation. 599 00:27:54,689 --> 00:27:55,793 Thank you. 600 00:27:55,793 --> 00:27:58,379 -And that's all I wanted to be, Meri. -So that's-- 601 00:27:58,379 --> 00:28:00,655 -It's just safe and easy. -[Robyn] Stay on that vein. 602 00:28:00,655 --> 00:28:01,862 Okay, well, I want to be. 603 00:28:01,862 --> 00:28:05,793 And not lump people into those things. 604 00:28:05,793 --> 00:28:07,482 I didn't feel like I was lumping. 605 00:28:07,482 --> 00:28:10,379 What did I say that made you feel like I was blaming you? 606 00:28:10,379 --> 00:28:13,482 Just you you brought up things I've said 607 00:28:13,482 --> 00:28:14,689 and things that I've done. 608 00:28:14,689 --> 00:28:17,137 -Right. She's saying-- -That feels like blame. 609 00:28:17,137 --> 00:28:19,482 -She's saying-- -I said... 610 00:28:19,482 --> 00:28:21,965 -Let me-- Can I, can I... -Yeah, yeah, go ahead. 611 00:28:21,965 --> 00:28:24,000 Sorry. I was trying to help. I'll shut up. 612 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,862 I understand. Thank you. 613 00:28:26,862 --> 00:28:29,448 I am just defensive a little bit for because of 614 00:28:29,448 --> 00:28:31,793 what's gone on with Janelle and with Christine 615 00:28:31,793 --> 00:28:33,000 and with the kids. 616 00:28:34,379 --> 00:28:36,275 I'm more defensive actually just because of 617 00:28:36,275 --> 00:28:37,965 my relationship with Meri. 618 00:28:39,965 --> 00:28:42,551 'Cause I've been managing it carefully, 619 00:28:43,379 --> 00:28:46,379 very carefully, for seven years. 620 00:28:46,379 --> 00:28:49,793 Listen, you break up, you have a divorce, 621 00:28:49,793 --> 00:28:52,689 you both whip out your victim cards. 622 00:28:52,689 --> 00:28:54,655 And I don't want that to happen here. 623 00:28:55,793 --> 00:29:01,103 I'm trying to be as honest as I possibly can without being... 624 00:29:02,034 --> 00:29:03,275 A jackass. 625 00:29:03,275 --> 00:29:06,206 [laughs] Thank you for not being a jackass. 626 00:29:06,793 --> 00:29:07,862 I appreciate that. 627 00:29:07,862 --> 00:29:10,586 Well, Robyn, how do you feel right now? [laughs] 628 00:29:10,586 --> 00:29:14,482 [Kody] Well, you know, maybe it's fair that Robyn's here, 629 00:29:14,482 --> 00:29:19,137 and she's been your advocate for seven years. 630 00:29:19,137 --> 00:29:21,551 Robyn was always, you have no business, 631 00:29:21,551 --> 00:29:23,862 you have no right to leave her. 632 00:29:23,862 --> 00:29:27,862 She's always advised me that I seek healing in 633 00:29:27,862 --> 00:29:30,551 this relationship, and she's still doing it. 634 00:29:31,586 --> 00:29:33,620 In a way against my wishes. 635 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:35,241 It's like, stop. 636 00:29:36,482 --> 00:29:39,689 I have to determine if this is right for me or not. 637 00:29:39,689 --> 00:29:41,586 I know you're a part of this. 638 00:29:41,586 --> 00:29:44,241 And I know you have a covenant inside of this 639 00:29:44,241 --> 00:29:45,965 that includes them. 640 00:29:49,275 --> 00:29:53,275 But we have to be in a place where I can love her 641 00:29:53,275 --> 00:29:55,275 the way she wants to be loved, 642 00:29:55,275 --> 00:29:59,103 or she is going to move on anyway. 643 00:29:59,103 --> 00:30:02,551 I think she's been my advocate for longer than that. 644 00:30:02,551 --> 00:30:08,034 According to our religion, sister wives are supposed 645 00:30:08,034 --> 00:30:09,586 to advocate for each other. 646 00:30:09,586 --> 00:30:14,000 I have always advocated for Kody's relationships 647 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:15,586 with his wives. 648 00:30:15,586 --> 00:30:18,896 And I feel like it's very important in order 649 00:30:18,896 --> 00:30:21,034 to live plural marriage successfully. 650 00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:29,413 You want something that we can't have together. 651 00:30:34,137 --> 00:30:36,620 And we can always have something else. 652 00:30:38,241 --> 00:30:39,413 But not that. 653 00:30:46,379 --> 00:30:47,620 [sniffles] 654 00:31:04,862 --> 00:31:05,758 [sighs] 655 00:31:09,482 --> 00:31:11,448 I can see where they're going with this. 656 00:31:12,172 --> 00:31:13,827 And they're both really calm. 657 00:31:17,068 --> 00:31:18,517 And that's scaring me. 658 00:31:20,689 --> 00:31:21,896 [exhales] 659 00:31:23,689 --> 00:31:26,241 And I just don't know how I'm supposed to sit here 660 00:31:28,172 --> 00:31:29,965 and watch them decide. 661 00:31:31,758 --> 00:31:33,586 If this is what they're gonna do, I just... 662 00:31:33,586 --> 00:31:35,758 I don't know if I can sit here with them. 663 00:31:37,241 --> 00:31:38,034 [sobs] 664 00:31:42,172 --> 00:31:43,862 [soft music playing] 665 00:31:58,586 --> 00:32:00,620 [music playing] 666 00:32:05,793 --> 00:32:09,793 I sit here feeling like it's ridiculous to stay 667 00:32:09,793 --> 00:32:11,689 in a duty-bound marriage. 668 00:32:11,689 --> 00:32:14,793 And I don't think it's fair to either of us. 669 00:32:14,793 --> 00:32:18,275 In so many ways, this moment is just about what 670 00:32:18,275 --> 00:32:22,137 we each want, and those aren't the same things. 671 00:32:22,137 --> 00:32:28,000 The hardest thing is accepting that it's not going to go back 672 00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:32,827 to a place that works for what you're looking for. 673 00:32:34,689 --> 00:32:38,482 I don't like that he's putting all this on me. 674 00:32:38,482 --> 00:32:43,689 And he's also not owning that he just doesn't have the interest. 675 00:32:43,689 --> 00:32:47,344 He said it to me in private, but he's still not 676 00:32:47,344 --> 00:32:48,448 saying it here. 677 00:32:50,793 --> 00:32:53,310 Doesn't mean I'm not mad at you for... 678 00:32:55,379 --> 00:32:56,551 [chuckles softly] 679 00:32:59,379 --> 00:33:01,862 ...not giving me what we promised each other. 680 00:33:07,448 --> 00:33:11,379 I walked away because I just couldn't handle 681 00:33:11,379 --> 00:33:15,068 the conversation and the direction it was going. 682 00:33:16,896 --> 00:33:21,758 Maybe if I'm there, I can stop him 683 00:33:21,758 --> 00:33:22,965 from finalizing it. 684 00:33:22,965 --> 00:33:27,241 And maybe if I'm there, then I can sort of say, well, 685 00:33:27,241 --> 00:33:29,344 let's not make any decisions today. 686 00:33:32,379 --> 00:33:34,655 You didn't have to be sorry you left. 687 00:33:35,551 --> 00:33:39,103 It's... Really painful, I know. 688 00:33:40,655 --> 00:33:42,551 And I want to be supportive, so. 689 00:33:45,448 --> 00:33:48,413 I don't know, I feel like we just had a breakup conversation. 690 00:33:49,586 --> 00:33:52,551 I'm glad we've gone this long so that we can be friends 691 00:33:52,551 --> 00:33:54,344 in the departure. 692 00:33:56,103 --> 00:33:57,862 [Kody] I do know-- 693 00:34:02,965 --> 00:34:06,137 [laughing] 694 00:34:06,137 --> 00:34:09,482 What else am I supposed to do with it, Robyn? 695 00:34:09,482 --> 00:34:11,688 You've been doing a certain thing for a long time. 696 00:34:11,688 --> 00:34:13,896 -I know I have. -Okay. 697 00:34:13,896 --> 00:34:17,068 I'm not going to force somebody to be with me 698 00:34:17,068 --> 00:34:18,551 who doesn't want to be with me. 699 00:34:18,551 --> 00:34:22,482 I'm not going to make somebody act 700 00:34:22,482 --> 00:34:24,137 how they don't want to act. 701 00:34:24,137 --> 00:34:25,310 Yeah, I get that. 702 00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:28,103 -I do. -And that's not fair. 703 00:34:28,103 --> 00:34:29,724 [Kody] Oh, the act is easy. 704 00:34:33,757 --> 00:34:35,000 The act is easy. 705 00:34:36,034 --> 00:34:37,655 The act is obvious. 706 00:34:38,379 --> 00:34:40,000 -Is it really that obvious? -Yes. 707 00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:42,000 The act is easy? What's the act? 708 00:34:42,000 --> 00:34:43,000 What are you saying? 709 00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,585 Just performing my duty as a husband. 710 00:34:45,585 --> 00:34:48,551 And I am not going to be a duty. 711 00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:52,172 And it wasn't an act, it was performance. 712 00:34:52,172 --> 00:34:53,137 It was performance. 713 00:34:53,137 --> 00:34:55,241 It was doing what I was supposed to. 714 00:34:55,241 --> 00:34:57,689 I'm sorry to call it an act. 715 00:34:57,689 --> 00:35:00,689 Nobody wants to be that. 716 00:35:00,689 --> 00:35:04,172 And I've experienced it and it's not fun. 717 00:35:05,793 --> 00:35:08,000 So one of the reasons why I fell in love with him... 718 00:35:10,586 --> 00:35:13,655 is because he loved Meri and he loved his wives. 719 00:35:15,137 --> 00:35:17,137 It's not an act. 720 00:35:17,137 --> 00:35:20,137 I know he's bitter now, I know he's struggling. 721 00:35:20,137 --> 00:35:22,379 So he's going into these weird, dark places, 722 00:35:22,379 --> 00:35:24,137 but it just... 723 00:35:25,965 --> 00:35:28,000 I'm so tired of him... 724 00:35:28,896 --> 00:35:31,931 [sighs] talking like this. 725 00:35:33,689 --> 00:35:36,517 I'm not deciding that this is over. 726 00:35:37,448 --> 00:35:42,172 This is me saying, Meri, what you want... 727 00:35:42,172 --> 00:35:44,448 -Is never gonna happen. -Doesn't work. 728 00:35:45,862 --> 00:35:48,827 Christine just said, I'm gone. I'm done. 729 00:35:50,482 --> 00:35:54,034 And she might not have been wrong, but I was upset 730 00:35:54,034 --> 00:35:55,896 because there was no negotiation. 731 00:35:55,896 --> 00:35:58,275 It was just all one-sided. 732 00:35:58,275 --> 00:35:59,896 I'm not trying to do that, Meri. 733 00:35:59,896 --> 00:36:02,379 I'm trying to be fair. 734 00:36:02,379 --> 00:36:05,275 I am willing to fake being in love with Meri, 735 00:36:05,275 --> 00:36:09,034 doing my duties as a husband, sort of putting up with things 736 00:36:09,034 --> 00:36:13,172 that frustrate me so deeply that I struggle 737 00:36:13,172 --> 00:36:14,344 to be around her. 738 00:36:14,551 --> 00:36:15,344 I... 739 00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:19,103 If I need to, 740 00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:24,413 for the sake of whatever, 741 00:36:25,137 --> 00:36:28,275 I don't know, I can fake through this. 742 00:36:28,275 --> 00:36:32,379 I don't want to, but if you're gonna insist, then we will. 743 00:36:32,379 --> 00:36:33,827 And she's like, "I don't want that." 744 00:36:35,275 --> 00:36:38,000 Why is he saying that he's willing to keep acting 745 00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:41,137 when he clearly hasn't been for eight or ten years? 746 00:36:41,137 --> 00:36:44,482 And also, I wouldn't want him to do that. 747 00:36:44,482 --> 00:36:46,172 I've wanted to... 748 00:36:47,172 --> 00:36:50,896 heal our relationship and even create a new relationship, 749 00:36:50,896 --> 00:36:52,310 but I've never insisted on it. 750 00:36:52,862 --> 00:36:54,931 I know that you don't feel 751 00:36:56,793 --> 00:36:58,965 or consider yourself married to me. 752 00:37:01,379 --> 00:37:02,620 [laughs] 753 00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:08,517 Kody and I disagree on this, but I don't think that he has. 754 00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:13,862 This is the agreement you required of me 755 00:37:13,862 --> 00:37:15,862 in order to get married. 756 00:37:18,379 --> 00:37:21,517 This agreement that I gave you, 757 00:37:22,034 --> 00:37:24,448 our sacred covenant, 758 00:37:25,965 --> 00:37:28,793 was if I'm ever not in love 759 00:37:28,793 --> 00:37:31,586 with you, I won't just sit there 760 00:37:31,586 --> 00:37:34,034 and be in a pathetic place with you. 761 00:37:35,344 --> 00:37:37,724 You made me promise you that. 762 00:37:40,793 --> 00:37:44,172 That doesn't mean the marriage is over. 763 00:37:44,172 --> 00:37:48,275 Listen, it's not gonna change what our relationship, 764 00:37:48,275 --> 00:37:52,448 ours, ours, ours, has been for years. 765 00:37:52,448 --> 00:37:54,413 -Nothing's gonna change. -Do you promise? 766 00:37:55,241 --> 00:37:56,172 [Kody] Hmm. 767 00:37:56,172 --> 00:37:58,655 -My intention-- -[Robyn] I was... 768 00:38:00,103 --> 00:38:02,103 ...hanging on with you. 769 00:38:04,379 --> 00:38:06,068 And I think now you need to let go. 770 00:38:06,068 --> 00:38:09,448 It's not fair to either of us. 771 00:38:09,448 --> 00:38:11,793 [sighs] 772 00:38:11,793 --> 00:38:15,344 -I know. -It's not fair for me to be alone 773 00:38:15,344 --> 00:38:17,000 like I have been for years. 774 00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:19,655 -And it's not fair for him... -I know. I know. 775 00:38:19,655 --> 00:38:25,034 -I know. -...to feel like he has to do a duty. 776 00:38:33,068 --> 00:38:34,241 [Robyn sobs] 777 00:38:40,793 --> 00:38:42,379 This isn't what I want. 778 00:38:42,379 --> 00:38:44,103 [Meri] It's not what I want either, Robyn. 779 00:38:45,275 --> 00:38:46,655 It's not what I want. 780 00:38:47,379 --> 00:38:49,172 [Kody] It's not what I wanted either. 781 00:38:51,034 --> 00:38:52,172 [exhales] 782 00:38:53,793 --> 00:38:56,551 Robyn came into our family specifically 783 00:38:56,551 --> 00:38:59,827 because she intended to live plural marriage. 784 00:39:03,344 --> 00:39:06,758 This appears to be the end of our plural marriage. 785 00:39:07,689 --> 00:39:09,862 [music playing] 786 00:39:13,551 --> 00:39:15,965 [Meri] I don't think that mine and Robyn's relationship 787 00:39:15,965 --> 00:39:18,172 will be too much different than what it's been. 788 00:39:18,172 --> 00:39:23,275 And also, I need to figure out how to be friends with 789 00:39:23,275 --> 00:39:25,310 my ex-husband's wife. 790 00:39:34,896 --> 00:39:36,793 [Kody] This is goodbye. 791 00:39:36,793 --> 00:39:39,655 It was a negotiation that was long overdue. 792 00:39:40,689 --> 00:39:43,655 I mean, it's been maybe a wasted seven years for Meri. 793 00:39:43,655 --> 00:39:45,172 I have no idea. 794 00:39:45,862 --> 00:39:48,344 But we've agreed now. 795 00:39:49,241 --> 00:39:52,413 And I hope she finds peace. 796 00:39:55,896 --> 00:39:57,137 'Cause I will. 797 00:39:59,758 --> 00:40:01,655 [music playing] 798 00:40:07,034 --> 00:40:09,241 [Robyn] I always wanted to live plural marriage. 799 00:40:10,793 --> 00:40:15,413 I will just continue to spend time on my knees, 800 00:40:17,172 --> 00:40:19,068 looking for peace and answers. 801 00:40:23,482 --> 00:40:26,172 'Cause there really is no other choice for me. 802 00:40:28,965 --> 00:40:30,551 [sniffles] 803 00:40:32,137 --> 00:40:35,793 I'm looking at that mountain and I'm thinking about 804 00:40:35,793 --> 00:40:37,000 when we came here. 805 00:40:37,586 --> 00:40:40,137 [all screaming] 806 00:40:40,137 --> 00:40:42,172 Oh, my God. 807 00:40:42,172 --> 00:40:44,482 [all screaming] 808 00:40:44,482 --> 00:40:47,172 -[all laughing] -[whooping] 809 00:40:47,172 --> 00:40:49,137 [whooping] 810 00:40:50,482 --> 00:40:53,103 -[all whooping] -[girl] Mom, it's not-- 811 00:40:53,103 --> 00:40:57,379 And we chose, all of us chose, we were so in love with 812 00:40:57,379 --> 00:41:00,241 this property and being together out here. 813 00:41:00,896 --> 00:41:02,724 [exhales] 814 00:41:03,448 --> 00:41:07,586 I wanted to sit on a porch 815 00:41:07,586 --> 00:41:09,655 with my sister wives 816 00:41:10,689 --> 00:41:13,551 here on this property 817 00:41:14,758 --> 00:41:17,103 with our kids and our grandkids. 818 00:41:19,344 --> 00:41:21,758 And Kody running around like he does, 819 00:41:21,758 --> 00:41:24,586 and just looking at that mountain together. 820 00:41:24,586 --> 00:41:29,000 I mean, a family, I don't understand. 821 00:41:30,241 --> 00:41:32,241 I don't understand. 822 00:41:32,586 --> 00:41:33,413 [sighs] 823 00:41:45,965 --> 00:41:47,172 [sniffles] 824 00:41:52,896 --> 00:41:55,103 [Kody reading] 825 00:41:55,103 --> 00:41:57,862 I was thinking to myself, I don't ever want to talk to Janelle again. 826 00:41:57,862 --> 00:42:00,586 You have six kids. 827 00:42:00,586 --> 00:42:02,551 That's worth fighting for. 828 00:42:02,551 --> 00:42:04,379 Were you in love with Meri when you married her? 829 00:42:04,379 --> 00:42:06,586 I told her I loved her, and I chose to love her. 830 00:42:06,586 --> 00:42:09,586 He would ask me to do things and ask me to be a certain way, 831 00:42:09,586 --> 00:42:11,068 but it's not good enough. 832 00:42:11,068 --> 00:42:12,862 I don't know how to let this go. 833 00:42:13,586 --> 00:42:15,689 And this isn't me just being dramatic. 834 00:42:15,689 --> 00:42:16,793 Thank you, Christine. 835 00:42:16,793 --> 00:42:18,172 Meri did ask her to be there. 836 00:42:18,172 --> 00:42:21,068 Because Robyn says that she can speak Kody, and I'm like, bull [bleep] 837 00:42:21,068 --> 00:42:22,965 Sorry, I'm gonna be nice. No, I'm not. 838 00:42:22,965 --> 00:42:24,758 Well, Kody can speak for himself. 839 00:42:24,758 --> 00:42:26,000 He's a grown-ass man. 840 00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:30,482 They're trash-talking me because I'm guilty of not loving them. 841 00:42:30,482 --> 00:42:32,965 -Have you met David? -Yes, I think he's great. 842 00:42:32,965 --> 00:42:34,068 Hey, David, come on out. 843 00:42:34,068 --> 00:42:36,103 -You're gonna meet the love of my life. -Hi, David.