1 00:00:01,379 --> 00:00:02,896 [Sukanya] Previously on Sister Wives One On One... 2 00:00:02,931 --> 00:00:05,758 The blame lays on one thing and one thing only. 3 00:00:05,793 --> 00:00:07,689 If you're going to marry and you're going to marry for eternity, 4 00:00:07,724 --> 00:00:10,965 you should start out in love. 5 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,000 How do you feel you started out with Robyn, then? 6 00:00:13,034 --> 00:00:14,482 Well, I fell in love with Robyn, 7 00:00:14,517 --> 00:00:16,274 I never fell in love with anybody else. 8 00:00:16,309 --> 00:00:20,000 I was just choosing to be in that covenant. 9 00:00:20,034 --> 00:00:21,862 You realize at that point, 10 00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,517 everything now is going to change. 11 00:00:23,551 --> 00:00:25,172 I know that he's happy with her. 12 00:00:25,206 --> 00:00:28,620 It's very unfortunate 13 00:00:28,655 --> 00:00:32,551 that the rest of the family had to go by the wayside. 14 00:00:32,586 --> 00:00:33,793 You're not listening. 15 00:00:33,827 --> 00:00:35,000 You're not listening to me. 16 00:00:35,034 --> 00:00:36,206 And I'm not going to. 17 00:00:36,241 --> 00:00:37,310 [bleep] you! 18 00:00:38,482 --> 00:00:39,896 Kody has had harsh words with me 19 00:00:39,931 --> 00:00:41,068 and I've had harsh words with him, 20 00:00:41,103 --> 00:00:43,172 but not to this, not to this level. 21 00:00:43,206 --> 00:00:44,758 That moment, I was thinking to myself, 22 00:00:44,793 --> 00:00:46,551 I don't ever want to talk to Janelle again. 23 00:00:46,586 --> 00:00:48,310 That's weird to me 'cause I kept saying, 24 00:00:48,344 --> 00:00:50,344 "You guys have how many years together 25 00:00:50,379 --> 00:00:52,413 and you have six kids." 26 00:00:52,448 --> 00:00:53,413 Yeah, 30 years. 27 00:00:54,379 --> 00:00:55,241 [sobbing] Sorry. 28 00:00:57,103 --> 00:00:59,551 Does he feel betrayed because Janelle is friends with you? 29 00:00:59,586 --> 00:01:01,137 Yes. 30 00:01:01,172 --> 00:01:03,758 And I'm like, "Well, buddy, this is what jealousy looks like." [laughs] 31 00:01:03,793 --> 00:01:05,551 -So, you guys distanced yourself after a fight? -No. 32 00:01:05,586 --> 00:01:07,241 No texting, no talking, no anything. 33 00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:08,517 I just didn't want to, 34 00:01:08,551 --> 00:01:10,344 he didn't reach out to me, I didn't reach out to him. 35 00:01:10,379 --> 00:01:13,068 I'm not gonna be angry with you anymore, okay? 36 00:01:13,103 --> 00:01:15,448 If you want to do a separation, I understand, 37 00:01:15,482 --> 00:01:16,827 but I'm not gonna be angry. 38 00:01:16,862 --> 00:01:18,896 So, Janelle is not in love with me. 39 00:01:18,931 --> 00:01:20,724 I think she thinks I'm hot. 40 00:01:20,758 --> 00:01:23,758 I got nice pecks and a great six-pack abs. 41 00:01:23,793 --> 00:01:25,862 But that's all she's interested in. 42 00:01:25,896 --> 00:01:27,344 He loves his pecks so much 43 00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:30,103 that I'm like, "I don't know. You love 'em so much now." 44 00:01:30,137 --> 00:01:31,206 So, you just felt like a resource? 45 00:01:31,241 --> 00:01:33,310 I felt like a piece of meat! 46 00:01:33,344 --> 00:01:35,586 -Did you guys just have great sex? -Mm. 47 00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:43,689 [Sukanya] Over the next three hours, 48 00:01:43,723 --> 00:01:45,378 I'm sitting down with each of the adults, 49 00:01:45,931 --> 00:01:46,827 Kody, 50 00:01:46,862 --> 00:01:47,931 Meri, 51 00:01:48,310 --> 00:01:49,137 Janelle, 52 00:01:49,965 --> 00:01:50,758 Christine, 53 00:01:51,413 --> 00:01:53,137 and Robyn 54 00:01:53,172 --> 00:01:56,344 to talk about some of the biggest and most dramatic moments 55 00:01:56,378 --> 00:01:57,310 of their lives. 56 00:01:57,758 --> 00:01:59,896 I want to believe 57 00:01:59,931 --> 00:02:02,620 that there is a part of him 58 00:02:02,655 --> 00:02:05,965 that is still the man that I married. 59 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,689 Were you in love with Meri when you married her? 60 00:02:08,275 --> 00:02:09,482 I told her I loved her 61 00:02:09,517 --> 00:02:12,413 and she thinks we were mad about each other 62 00:02:12,448 --> 00:02:16,655 and we acted that, we played that out. 63 00:02:16,689 --> 00:02:19,448 I don't know why Meri hasn't left before now. 64 00:02:19,482 --> 00:02:21,000 I would have. 65 00:02:21,034 --> 00:02:22,448 [Sukanya] What do you think about the whole ring thing? 66 00:02:22,482 --> 00:02:24,689 I don't know, I don't feel like it's all the way my place, 67 00:02:24,724 --> 00:02:25,793 but here we are. 68 00:02:25,827 --> 00:02:28,206 So, Kody and Meri had a wedding ring. 69 00:02:28,241 --> 00:02:30,241 He melted down the ring, 70 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,586 saved the gold, saved the diamonds... 71 00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:34,034 And it was over here 72 00:02:34,067 --> 00:02:35,655 and my wedding ring was on, 73 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,275 and, you know, I just went, 74 00:02:37,310 --> 00:02:39,896 "Those relationships are over." 75 00:02:39,930 --> 00:02:42,034 I don't know why he hates his life so much. 76 00:02:42,067 --> 00:02:44,000 But that's really sad, I've never heard him say that. 77 00:02:44,724 --> 00:02:46,275 But it shows. 78 00:02:46,310 --> 00:02:48,275 How does he sabotage your relationship? 79 00:02:48,310 --> 00:02:51,586 Um... He picks fights with me. 80 00:02:52,310 --> 00:02:53,275 Why? 81 00:02:53,930 --> 00:02:54,965 You love her. 82 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,310 Yeah, but I wanted to punish myself. 83 00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:58,896 They deserve to be happy. 84 00:02:58,930 --> 00:03:01,655 Go be happy with each other, for goodness sakes. 85 00:03:01,689 --> 00:03:03,482 Let the rest of us go. 86 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:07,137 [Sukanya] This isSister Wives One On One. 87 00:03:08,206 --> 00:03:09,724 [producer] Is that good? 88 00:03:09,758 --> 00:03:11,965 Standby please, be very quiet. 89 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:14,344 I don't know much about your relationship 90 00:03:14,379 --> 00:03:15,655 -with Janelle. -Yeah. 91 00:03:15,689 --> 00:03:18,586 Did you guys just have great sex? 92 00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:19,344 Mm. 93 00:03:20,379 --> 00:03:21,655 [Sukanya] I'm gonna ask that 94 00:03:21,689 --> 00:03:22,758 'cause if you're saying that you were just a piece of meat-- 95 00:03:22,793 --> 00:03:23,517 [Kody] I won't answer that question. 96 00:03:23,551 --> 00:03:24,758 That's not what it is. 97 00:03:24,793 --> 00:03:26,620 -These are loving relationships. -[Sukanya] Yeah. 98 00:03:26,655 --> 00:03:27,620 Sex is part of it. 99 00:03:27,655 --> 00:03:29,517 But let's not focus-- 100 00:03:29,551 --> 00:03:30,827 But was it a physical relationship 101 00:03:30,862 --> 00:03:32,689 where you both were just attracted to each other? 102 00:03:33,620 --> 00:03:35,000 No, is that... 103 00:03:35,896 --> 00:03:36,827 There was a... 104 00:03:37,448 --> 00:03:38,448 I don't know. 105 00:03:38,482 --> 00:03:40,103 She asked to be in the family. 106 00:03:40,137 --> 00:03:43,310 For what reasons she thought was in this, 107 00:03:43,344 --> 00:03:44,930 but it was-- 108 00:03:44,965 --> 00:03:46,310 'Cause she loved you? 109 00:03:46,344 --> 00:03:48,103 No, she was attracted to me. 110 00:03:48,137 --> 00:03:49,655 I know she wasn't in love with me. 111 00:03:50,586 --> 00:03:52,379 Most people fall in love first, right? 112 00:03:52,413 --> 00:03:54,586 Physically, they look at each other compatibly. 113 00:03:54,620 --> 00:03:56,930 You guys had this spiritual covenant between the two of you. 114 00:03:56,965 --> 00:03:58,724 There was definitely physical compatibility. 115 00:03:58,758 --> 00:03:59,724 -[Sukanya] Yeah. -Yeah. 116 00:03:59,758 --> 00:04:01,758 Well, I feel like... okay. 117 00:04:01,793 --> 00:04:04,793 -I feel like you've buried the lede all of these years... -[Janelle laughs] 118 00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:09,137 ...that you and Kody had a way more physical connection 119 00:04:09,655 --> 00:04:11,413 than... 120 00:04:11,448 --> 00:04:14,241 -anybody had ever imagined. -[Janelle laughs] 121 00:04:14,275 --> 00:04:16,620 Yeah, because I'm not someone who goes around blabbing about that. 122 00:04:16,654 --> 00:04:18,310 It's not my... that's not me. 123 00:04:18,344 --> 00:04:19,517 I don't talk about that stuff. 124 00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:21,172 -[Sukanya] Yeah, but all those kids-- -Oh, he tatted? 125 00:04:21,206 --> 00:04:23,862 Listen, all those kids later, you gotta imagine-- 126 00:04:23,896 --> 00:04:25,827 No, I'll hint at it. But yes, of course. 127 00:04:25,862 --> 00:04:28,482 Everything was very good in that department. 128 00:04:28,517 --> 00:04:31,206 [Sukanya] So, when you fought, make up, 129 00:04:31,241 --> 00:04:33,724 making up was really the best part of it all. 130 00:04:33,758 --> 00:04:34,758 Oh, yeah. 131 00:04:34,793 --> 00:04:37,413 I'm sitting here from a perspective of like, 132 00:04:37,448 --> 00:04:40,344 my whole family is dismantling. 133 00:04:40,379 --> 00:04:43,413 You know, and I'm reaching to this one to try and save. 134 00:04:43,448 --> 00:04:45,965 But why couldn't you in that moment say, 135 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:48,827 "I want to reconcile with you. I love you." 136 00:04:48,862 --> 00:04:52,275 I do think I wanna stay separated for now. 137 00:04:52,758 --> 00:04:53,620 [Kody] Really? 138 00:04:54,931 --> 00:04:56,413 Really, you want to stay separated? 139 00:04:56,448 --> 00:04:57,482 Yeah, I do. 140 00:04:58,482 --> 00:04:59,724 No, no, no, no, no. 141 00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:01,413 No, I am not in that place. 142 00:05:01,448 --> 00:05:03,931 I am not wanting to pursue her. 143 00:05:03,965 --> 00:05:06,379 I'm not wanting to drop everything and say, 144 00:05:06,413 --> 00:05:09,413 "Baby, you're the be all end all, I want you." 145 00:05:09,448 --> 00:05:10,482 I'm not there now. 146 00:05:10,517 --> 00:05:12,655 We haven't talked for four weeks. 147 00:05:12,689 --> 00:05:15,655 And I'm coming from a position where I feel totally betrayed. 148 00:05:15,689 --> 00:05:17,862 Now I'm ashamed of that fight 149 00:05:17,896 --> 00:05:20,172 because instead of communicating, 150 00:05:20,206 --> 00:05:23,068 it just was, boom, boom, boom triggers. 151 00:05:23,103 --> 00:05:25,517 I need you to stop blaming me for everything 152 00:05:25,551 --> 00:05:28,034 and start being culpable for what you have done. 153 00:05:28,068 --> 00:05:29,965 That is accountability. 154 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,137 You made this about all these other problems 155 00:05:32,172 --> 00:05:33,896 that we have that we can't sleep on. 156 00:05:33,931 --> 00:05:35,068 -[Kody] I did not! -This became... 157 00:05:35,103 --> 00:05:37,827 -Yes, you did. -I did not, I did not, I did not. 158 00:05:37,862 --> 00:05:41,137 But now, I'm like, going, "I don't want to be triggered. 159 00:05:41,172 --> 00:05:43,793 Let's see if we can reconcile. Let's talk about this." 160 00:05:43,827 --> 00:05:46,862 And she's going, "I think I want a separation." 161 00:05:46,896 --> 00:05:50,103 So, it's a fine line between like, "We got to make this work" 162 00:05:50,137 --> 00:05:51,551 and "This is unfixable." 163 00:05:51,586 --> 00:05:54,103 Because I'm going through a process of... 164 00:05:55,724 --> 00:05:57,137 just like she is. 165 00:05:57,172 --> 00:05:58,965 I know she's in this space 166 00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:02,965 where if we reconcile, 167 00:06:03,586 --> 00:06:05,413 will I lose myself 168 00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:07,344 or will I find myself? 169 00:06:07,379 --> 00:06:09,965 I don't think Kody really does hold out hope for me. 170 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:11,965 I think he likes the idea... 171 00:06:12,482 --> 00:06:16,206 of our family and... 172 00:06:16,241 --> 00:06:20,965 I think he feels like he promised Robyn a plural family. 173 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:22,586 There's a little bit of his ego tied up, 174 00:06:22,620 --> 00:06:26,103 but I don't think it's about that he's holding out hope pining for me. 175 00:06:26,137 --> 00:06:27,724 He's never really come to me and said, 176 00:06:27,758 --> 00:06:29,586 "Look, I really love you 177 00:06:29,620 --> 00:06:31,103 and I really wanna make this work." 178 00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,551 He's never said that? 179 00:06:33,586 --> 00:06:37,931 No, not like in that very deep, intimate connection way. 180 00:06:37,965 --> 00:06:40,517 I needed more of what was between us. 181 00:06:41,586 --> 00:06:43,379 For him, it became about 182 00:06:43,413 --> 00:06:44,758 I needed to co-parent, 183 00:06:44,793 --> 00:06:45,965 I needed to be less independent. 184 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,241 I needed to do all these things 185 00:06:47,275 --> 00:06:50,103 in order to earn that relationship. 186 00:06:50,137 --> 00:06:53,448 And I'm like, "Dude, no. I don't need to earn a relationship. 187 00:06:53,482 --> 00:06:55,172 I always felt like, 188 00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:58,482 I needed to do something to earn love to earn... 189 00:06:58,517 --> 00:06:59,620 earn acceptance 190 00:06:59,655 --> 00:07:02,344 or I had to do something a certain way 191 00:07:02,379 --> 00:07:06,068 and I didn't even realize how much stress I was under. 192 00:07:06,103 --> 00:07:08,448 Kody's had really specific things that he liked. 193 00:07:08,482 --> 00:07:09,793 And when he came over, 194 00:07:09,827 --> 00:07:11,793 I wanna, you know, "Sure, let's go ahead 195 00:07:11,827 --> 00:07:13,689 and cook the kind of dinner that you like. 196 00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:15,965 Or make sure the house is cleaned a certain way 197 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:17,931 or you know, whatever and things like that. 198 00:07:17,965 --> 00:07:20,758 I just wanted him to be comfortable in my home. 199 00:07:20,793 --> 00:07:23,310 Do you think that Kody ever saw that in you that loyalty... 200 00:07:23,344 --> 00:07:27,482 that loyalty that he is struggling to find 201 00:07:27,517 --> 00:07:29,241 -in Janelle right now? -No. 202 00:07:29,758 --> 00:07:31,448 He said that he did, 203 00:07:31,482 --> 00:07:33,758 you know years ago, 204 00:07:33,793 --> 00:07:36,655 but I don't think he saw that. 205 00:07:36,689 --> 00:07:38,931 I don't think what he saw he valued. 206 00:07:40,413 --> 00:07:41,827 But you're saying you're loyal and that's something 207 00:07:41,862 --> 00:07:43,724 that he really values right now. 208 00:07:44,758 --> 00:07:46,034 But it's not good enough. 209 00:07:47,137 --> 00:07:48,758 You know, he would ask me to do things 210 00:07:48,793 --> 00:07:50,241 and asked me to be a certain way 211 00:07:50,275 --> 00:07:51,689 or asked me to fix a situation 212 00:07:51,724 --> 00:07:54,448 or asked me to share some information with him or whatever. 213 00:07:54,482 --> 00:07:58,137 All these things to be able to fix our relationship. 214 00:07:58,172 --> 00:08:00,896 And I did every one of the things that he asked me to, 215 00:08:00,931 --> 00:08:02,379 and then it just wasn't good enough. 216 00:08:02,413 --> 00:08:05,034 So, it just came down to... 217 00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:08,034 I mean, you're asking if loyalty was enough, 218 00:08:08,068 --> 00:08:09,551 and it wasn't for him. 219 00:08:09,586 --> 00:08:11,620 Was he just not emotionally available to you? 220 00:08:12,310 --> 00:08:13,000 Correct. 221 00:08:14,413 --> 00:08:15,896 Yeah. 222 00:08:15,931 --> 00:08:18,517 Is it hard for you to see him be emotionally available to somebody else? 223 00:08:18,551 --> 00:08:20,172 Yeah, yep. 224 00:08:20,206 --> 00:08:22,137 Is that like a dagger in your heart? 225 00:08:22,172 --> 00:08:24,482 [laughs sarcastically] It's like a knife in my kidneys. 226 00:08:26,758 --> 00:08:29,482 Man, just the knife in the kidneys 227 00:08:29,517 --> 00:08:31,241 over all these years! 228 00:08:33,895 --> 00:08:36,379 -[laughing] Sorry. -[Sukanya] I know where that line is from. 229 00:08:36,413 --> 00:08:38,965 So, were you in love with Meri when you married her? 230 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,413 I told her I loved her and I chose to love her. 231 00:08:42,136 --> 00:08:44,034 And I chose to be romantic 232 00:08:44,068 --> 00:08:47,103 because she thinks I was madly head over heels over her 233 00:08:47,137 --> 00:08:51,379 and it was not that experience for me. 234 00:08:51,413 --> 00:08:53,793 But I was always a life affirming person. 235 00:08:53,827 --> 00:08:55,586 I would always affirm what I wanted. 236 00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:57,172 And so, I told her 237 00:08:57,206 --> 00:09:00,896 and did everything I could to love her. 238 00:09:00,931 --> 00:09:03,862 And she thinks we were mad about each other 239 00:09:03,896 --> 00:09:05,310 and... 240 00:09:06,275 --> 00:09:08,620 we acted that, 241 00:09:08,655 --> 00:09:10,344 we played that out. 242 00:09:10,379 --> 00:09:12,379 That's gonna hurt when she hears that, you know that, right? 243 00:09:12,413 --> 00:09:16,068 It's just... I... It just... 244 00:09:17,137 --> 00:09:20,896 Well, we did have a very romantic experience. 245 00:09:20,931 --> 00:09:21,793 [Sukanya] Okay. 246 00:09:21,827 --> 00:09:24,586 We started out that way, but there was... 247 00:09:25,413 --> 00:09:27,586 a lot of dysfunction that we had. 248 00:09:28,241 --> 00:09:29,137 [Sukanya] Coming up... 249 00:09:29,172 --> 00:09:30,896 So, do you think Robyn is pressuring Kody 250 00:09:30,931 --> 00:09:33,241 to rekindle the relationship at this point? 251 00:09:33,275 --> 00:09:35,103 Robyn wants Meri to stay so badly, 252 00:09:35,137 --> 00:09:37,310 but there's no life for Meri. if she stays. 253 00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:40,137 -Did you expect more from Kody in that moment? -No. 254 00:09:40,172 --> 00:09:42,241 That was basically what I expected from him. 255 00:09:42,275 --> 00:09:43,862 -[Sukanya] Really? -Yeah. 256 00:09:43,896 --> 00:09:46,068 I don't know, it's kind of a big mess to me. 257 00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:55,827 [producer] All right, settle. And mark it please. 258 00:09:55,862 --> 00:09:57,000 [Sukanya] All right, Meri, 259 00:09:57,034 --> 00:09:58,413 talking about you moving your business. 260 00:09:59,103 --> 00:10:01,551 It was a difficult decision 261 00:10:01,586 --> 00:10:03,586 -that you were making at that time. -Mm-hmm. 262 00:10:03,620 --> 00:10:07,689 And that decision to then tell Kody 263 00:10:07,724 --> 00:10:09,068 along with Robyn 264 00:10:09,103 --> 00:10:11,137 was even more heart wrenching for you 265 00:10:11,172 --> 00:10:12,517 as we saw play out... 266 00:10:12,551 --> 00:10:13,551 -Yeah. -...in this clip. 267 00:10:13,586 --> 00:10:15,034 -Let's take a look at it. -Okay. 268 00:10:15,068 --> 00:10:16,172 -And then, we'll talk about it. -Okay. 269 00:10:17,586 --> 00:10:20,482 Okay, well, thanks for coming over. 270 00:10:20,517 --> 00:10:22,034 I told Robyn this the other day 271 00:10:22,068 --> 00:10:24,586 and just thought I'd let you know... [laughs nervously] 272 00:10:25,413 --> 00:10:27,034 ...that I am... 273 00:10:28,103 --> 00:10:29,620 am... 274 00:10:29,655 --> 00:10:30,931 going to downsize. 275 00:10:34,310 --> 00:10:36,482 And get a smaller place and move 276 00:10:36,517 --> 00:10:38,896 my clothing business out to the B&B. 277 00:10:39,896 --> 00:10:41,827 Cool. That's good, right? 278 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,655 -[Meri] So-- -[Robyn] It freaks me out. 279 00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:49,413 so I was stressed out about it 280 00:10:49,448 --> 00:10:50,413 'cause I was worried. 281 00:10:50,758 --> 00:10:51,793 Oh. 282 00:10:51,827 --> 00:10:53,689 [Robyn] We just have to make sure that we're... 283 00:10:54,931 --> 00:10:55,862 scheduling. 284 00:10:56,275 --> 00:10:57,000 Yep. 285 00:11:00,482 --> 00:11:02,482 He's scowling at you. [laughs] 286 00:11:02,517 --> 00:11:03,931 [Kody] What... 287 00:11:03,965 --> 00:11:06,586 Like, in order for us to see each other. 288 00:11:08,172 --> 00:11:09,448 Yeah. 289 00:11:09,482 --> 00:11:12,241 [laughing] There's some cognitive dissonance going on here. 290 00:11:12,551 --> 00:11:13,551 You know? 291 00:11:14,517 --> 00:11:17,241 We're not admitting where we're at. 292 00:11:17,275 --> 00:11:19,206 Robyn and Meri are still talking about 293 00:11:19,241 --> 00:11:21,275 this relationship that the three of us have, 294 00:11:21,310 --> 00:11:23,034 like we're a family. 295 00:11:23,068 --> 00:11:25,689 And what I'm gathering from what Robyn is saying 296 00:11:25,724 --> 00:11:27,620 is like, "Well, you gotta be around 297 00:11:27,655 --> 00:11:29,000 because this is your wife." 298 00:11:30,034 --> 00:11:30,896 And I'm like... 299 00:11:32,620 --> 00:11:35,275 "And I just don't need that kind of pressure from you." 300 00:11:36,517 --> 00:11:38,896 Sorry, I'm distracted by your ring, that's it. 301 00:11:38,931 --> 00:11:39,724 A different ring. 302 00:11:41,241 --> 00:11:42,379 [Kody] Just a ring. 303 00:11:42,413 --> 00:11:44,862 So, are you going to actually... [laughs nervously] 304 00:11:44,896 --> 00:11:47,206 -What? -...address the concern that you have? 305 00:11:47,241 --> 00:11:48,413 What concern? 306 00:11:49,689 --> 00:11:50,862 [scoffs] 307 00:11:50,896 --> 00:11:52,103 No, I'm not gonna... 308 00:11:52,137 --> 00:11:54,241 Why would I address that concern? 309 00:11:54,275 --> 00:11:58,448 Well, now you want us to make it something specifically clear, so. 310 00:11:58,482 --> 00:12:03,068 Fine. This does not mean I'm leaving the family or you. 311 00:12:03,827 --> 00:12:04,724 So... 312 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:06,068 Okay, good on you, Meri. 313 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,103 In my head, 314 00:12:08,137 --> 00:12:10,551 I'm really wondering why she lives in Flagstaff. 315 00:12:11,137 --> 00:12:12,137 Hm. 316 00:12:12,172 --> 00:12:15,586 I don't want you to think that I'm walking away 317 00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:18,724 because sorry, I still have hope. 318 00:12:18,758 --> 00:12:20,413 [Kody] Meri doesn't know what she wants. 319 00:12:21,137 --> 00:12:22,517 But she's asking me. 320 00:12:22,551 --> 00:12:24,482 I'm just gonna throw out ideas. 321 00:12:24,517 --> 00:12:27,172 I want a place to put my car 322 00:12:27,206 --> 00:12:29,482 that I don't drive except for in the summer. 323 00:12:29,517 --> 00:12:31,551 I want a place to put my stuff. 324 00:12:33,103 --> 00:12:37,827 The barndominium is basically a big giant garage or barn 325 00:12:37,862 --> 00:12:39,965 that has a loft apartment in it. 326 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,413 You could live in that loft. 327 00:12:42,965 --> 00:12:44,724 It could be about this big. 328 00:12:44,758 --> 00:12:47,793 He just wants to put me out there with all the stuff, 329 00:12:47,827 --> 00:12:49,068 the extra stuff 330 00:12:49,103 --> 00:12:51,172 that he doesn't want to see, he doesn't want to deal with. 331 00:12:51,206 --> 00:12:52,310 It's just insulting. 332 00:12:53,137 --> 00:12:54,862 Well, thanks for letting me know. 333 00:12:55,482 --> 00:12:56,310 Yep. 334 00:12:58,034 --> 00:13:00,655 [Robyn] She can really be in this, like, dark place 335 00:13:00,689 --> 00:13:02,793 and she'll go like, "Why am I trying?" 336 00:13:03,551 --> 00:13:04,896 I said, 337 00:13:04,931 --> 00:13:06,965 "Meri, if you don't want to try any more, 338 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:10,206 I don't want to be selfish and keep you here." 339 00:13:10,241 --> 00:13:13,137 And she said, "Don't ever say that to me again." 340 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,103 She says, "I need you to always... 341 00:13:19,310 --> 00:13:21,965 be fighting for our relationship 342 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,827 because there's days when I am too weak 343 00:13:24,862 --> 00:13:26,103 to continue to fight. 344 00:13:26,137 --> 00:13:28,931 I need someone else to fight." 345 00:13:31,448 --> 00:13:33,724 I think I wanna talk about Kody's reaction. 346 00:13:33,758 --> 00:13:36,206 -Did you expect more from Kody in that moment? -No. 347 00:13:36,241 --> 00:13:37,689 I expected... 348 00:13:37,724 --> 00:13:40,172 -That was basically what I expected from him. -[Sukanya] Really? 349 00:13:40,586 --> 00:13:41,517 Yeah. 350 00:13:41,551 --> 00:13:44,172 I think at that point, I had hoped 351 00:13:44,206 --> 00:13:46,344 that there would be something different, 352 00:13:46,379 --> 00:13:48,482 but I didn't really expect anything. 353 00:13:48,517 --> 00:13:49,793 You know what I mean? 354 00:13:49,827 --> 00:13:51,793 And then you've got Robyn here, 355 00:13:51,827 --> 00:13:54,172 saying, you know, she's telling me to fight for her. 356 00:13:54,206 --> 00:13:55,862 She's telling me that she can't be strong 357 00:13:55,896 --> 00:13:57,034 and she needs somebody to fight. 358 00:13:57,068 --> 00:13:58,689 Did you actually asked her to do that? 359 00:13:58,724 --> 00:14:00,655 There were times years ago 360 00:14:00,689 --> 00:14:04,137 that we had those conversations. 361 00:14:04,172 --> 00:14:06,931 Because, you know, she would say things like that, 362 00:14:06,965 --> 00:14:09,068 like, "It's okay if you want to go," you know? 363 00:14:09,103 --> 00:14:11,689 Like, "Our family doesn't have to look the same way 364 00:14:11,724 --> 00:14:12,931 that it always has." 365 00:14:12,965 --> 00:14:15,000 And I'm like, "Listen, this is not what I want. 366 00:14:15,034 --> 00:14:18,482 I want to hold to my commitment. 367 00:14:18,517 --> 00:14:21,482 I want to hold to the promises that we made 368 00:14:21,517 --> 00:14:22,517 when we got married. 369 00:14:22,551 --> 00:14:24,689 I want to believe 370 00:14:24,724 --> 00:14:27,206 that there is a part of him 371 00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:30,724 that is still the man that I married 372 00:14:30,758 --> 00:14:33,862 and wants the person that he married to. 373 00:14:33,896 --> 00:14:36,551 Did you hope that Kody was gonna react just a little bit differently? 374 00:14:36,586 --> 00:14:38,344 -Mm-hmm. -It's kind of like you were looking at him like, 375 00:14:39,137 --> 00:14:40,103 "Come on, Kody." 376 00:14:40,137 --> 00:14:42,310 Yeah, yeah. I'm like, looking at him going, 377 00:14:42,344 --> 00:14:46,068 "Listen, you know that she is very vulnerable here talking about this. 378 00:14:46,103 --> 00:14:47,310 You know that she's... 379 00:14:49,172 --> 00:14:51,275 you know, hopeful 380 00:14:51,310 --> 00:14:52,655 -that-- -And when he reacted the way he did, 381 00:14:52,689 --> 00:14:54,275 were you disappointed? 382 00:14:55,344 --> 00:14:56,862 Yeah, just a little frustrated. 383 00:14:56,896 --> 00:15:01,103 It was like, "Okay, that's not helpful." 384 00:15:01,137 --> 00:15:01,965 'Cause I don't... 385 00:15:04,724 --> 00:15:06,620 'Cause I didn't want her to leave. 386 00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:08,689 So, do you think Robyn is pressuring Kody 387 00:15:08,724 --> 00:15:11,172 to rekindle the relationship at this point? 388 00:15:11,206 --> 00:15:14,689 I feel like, for years she's been telling Meri to, "Hold on, hold on, hold on." 389 00:15:14,724 --> 00:15:15,793 You know, "Stay, stay, stay." 390 00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:18,517 And I feel like, for years, Kody has been going, 391 00:15:18,551 --> 00:15:20,103 "Leave, leave, leave, leave, leave, leave." 392 00:15:20,137 --> 00:15:22,724 You know, so I feel like, there's a big disconnect 393 00:15:22,758 --> 00:15:24,724 'cause Robyn wants Meri to stay so badly. 394 00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:26,172 But what, what... 395 00:15:26,931 --> 00:15:28,793 There's no life for Meri. 396 00:15:28,827 --> 00:15:31,137 There's no life for Meri if she stays. 397 00:15:31,172 --> 00:15:34,172 She's been here for how long without a relationship, 398 00:15:34,206 --> 00:15:35,896 how long without a marriage, how... 399 00:15:35,931 --> 00:15:38,827 To occasionally see the kids, 400 00:15:38,862 --> 00:15:40,724 it's not enough, that's not a life. 401 00:15:40,758 --> 00:15:45,103 So, I just don't know what Robyn's motive is. 402 00:15:45,137 --> 00:15:46,793 I don't know why 403 00:15:46,827 --> 00:15:51,793 she is pressuring Meri to stay 404 00:15:51,827 --> 00:15:53,965 in a situation where she's not happy. 405 00:15:54,793 --> 00:15:56,034 I understand what she's saying. 406 00:15:56,068 --> 00:15:57,413 But at the same time, 407 00:15:57,448 --> 00:15:59,172 I see things from Kody. 408 00:15:59,206 --> 00:16:03,137 He gets kind of, he gets very inclusive about her. 409 00:16:03,172 --> 00:16:04,965 He talks about how he needs to contact her, 410 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,551 "It's been a while." 411 00:16:06,586 --> 00:16:10,655 And he really, it's like he considers her. 412 00:16:10,689 --> 00:16:13,896 Even though it's not the consideration that she wants, 413 00:16:14,655 --> 00:16:16,310 he does consider her. 414 00:16:17,068 --> 00:16:19,103 -What do you think? -Well... 415 00:16:19,137 --> 00:16:20,586 What Meri said, the last part. 416 00:16:20,620 --> 00:16:22,620 "It's almost like what Robyn wants..." 417 00:16:22,655 --> 00:16:26,000 Me and Robyn wants Meri and I to reconcile 418 00:16:26,034 --> 00:16:30,137 and I've been frustrated by that pressure. 419 00:16:30,172 --> 00:16:33,448 And she, from day one, has been advocating. 420 00:16:33,482 --> 00:16:36,931 She'd been, "You need to reconcile with Meri," for seven years. 421 00:16:38,172 --> 00:16:39,827 Yeah, she's like, "You need to reconcile with Meri, 422 00:16:39,862 --> 00:16:41,379 you got to figure this out." 423 00:16:41,413 --> 00:16:44,000 But I don't feel any... 424 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:48,379 I feel the emotions of friendship with Meri. 425 00:16:51,551 --> 00:16:52,655 I don't understand... 426 00:16:56,551 --> 00:16:58,000 Why she doesn't understand 427 00:16:58,034 --> 00:17:00,241 that where our relationship is. 428 00:17:00,275 --> 00:17:03,034 I think she's in this position waiting 429 00:17:03,931 --> 00:17:04,964 for me to go, 430 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:06,758 "Oh, no, don't move to Parowan. 431 00:17:06,792 --> 00:17:08,241 I'm worried that you're doing this." 432 00:17:08,275 --> 00:17:09,034 You know, stuff like that. 433 00:17:09,068 --> 00:17:11,413 I'm just like, in a place from... 434 00:17:13,550 --> 00:17:17,586 I'm not... I'm a little too ambivalent, to be fair. 435 00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:20,275 Well, have you ever told Robyn that you don't feel married to Meri? 436 00:17:20,310 --> 00:17:22,241 Yeah, of course, Robyn knows where I'm at. 437 00:17:22,931 --> 00:17:24,275 Do you think Robyn being there 438 00:17:24,310 --> 00:17:27,792 and kind of in-between, the go-between in that relationship, 439 00:17:27,827 --> 00:17:30,172 is that kind of giving' a sense of false hope? 440 00:17:30,862 --> 00:17:32,172 Um... 441 00:17:32,206 --> 00:17:36,344 No, I think Robyn really does try to advocate for Meri 442 00:17:36,896 --> 00:17:38,620 for better or for worse. 443 00:17:38,655 --> 00:17:41,172 As Robyn, I never would have put myself in that position. 444 00:17:41,206 --> 00:17:44,482 If Kody can't talk to Meri alone, 445 00:17:44,517 --> 00:17:47,275 then they probably shouldn't be having any kind of conversations, 446 00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:49,482 but I know that Meri calls Robyn in. 447 00:17:51,275 --> 00:17:53,448 I don't know, it's kind of a big mess to me. 448 00:17:53,482 --> 00:17:55,551 Do you think Kody is just kind of afraid to... 449 00:17:55,586 --> 00:17:57,862 in front of Robyn say, 450 00:17:57,896 --> 00:18:00,655 "Hey, this is not working." 451 00:18:00,689 --> 00:18:01,689 No, I don't think so. 452 00:18:01,724 --> 00:18:04,620 Because he even would say it in front of me. 453 00:18:04,655 --> 00:18:06,206 I mean, he was very vocal with me, 454 00:18:06,241 --> 00:18:10,551 even that there was no hope of a relationship there. 455 00:18:10,586 --> 00:18:12,862 So, I don't think he's afraid to say it. 456 00:18:13,655 --> 00:18:15,655 There's been a lot of moments 457 00:18:15,689 --> 00:18:19,137 I feel where Kody has been emotionally so withdrawn from Meri, 458 00:18:19,172 --> 00:18:22,413 but Meri has hope, a lot of hope. 459 00:18:22,448 --> 00:18:25,275 I think you have hope and you have hope and you have hope 460 00:18:25,310 --> 00:18:27,724 until you realize you don't have hope anymore. 461 00:18:27,758 --> 00:18:32,241 And that realization that there's no hope anymore, 462 00:18:32,275 --> 00:18:36,172 it can still be a while after that until you can leave. 463 00:18:36,206 --> 00:18:37,931 I had hope for so long, for so long. 464 00:18:37,965 --> 00:18:39,586 And I imagine this is how Meri felt. 465 00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,620 Even though he was saying that, 466 00:18:41,655 --> 00:18:43,206 she still had hope. 467 00:18:43,241 --> 00:18:45,103 And there comes a time when you realize, 468 00:18:45,689 --> 00:18:48,551 "Oh, there is no hope." 469 00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:50,344 I will always love her. 470 00:18:51,206 --> 00:18:52,931 I can't be in love with her. 471 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:54,931 It's not safe for me. 472 00:18:56,965 --> 00:18:58,793 And when I say that, there's... 473 00:18:58,827 --> 00:19:00,551 makeup any bull [bleep] you want, 474 00:19:00,586 --> 00:19:03,758 but I'm telling you, I'm not going to sit here and drive the bus over her. 475 00:19:04,413 --> 00:19:06,206 Because this is sad, 476 00:19:06,241 --> 00:19:07,551 it's heartbreaking, 477 00:19:07,586 --> 00:19:10,517 it just didn't work. 478 00:19:10,551 --> 00:19:11,655 [Sukanya] Coming up... 479 00:19:11,689 --> 00:19:14,689 -I had a separate conversation with Robyn. -Mm-hmm. 480 00:19:14,724 --> 00:19:18,137 And then, I asked her to come to this conversation with Kody. 481 00:19:18,172 --> 00:19:19,137 Why did you ask her? 482 00:19:19,172 --> 00:19:22,275 Because she speaks Kody. 483 00:19:22,310 --> 00:19:23,551 Do you think you speak Kody? 484 00:19:23,586 --> 00:19:25,551 I think I get Kody pretty well. 485 00:19:25,586 --> 00:19:27,551 Like, I feel like, I understand him, yeah. 486 00:19:27,586 --> 00:19:30,482 Robyn says that she can speak Kody and I'm like, "Bull [bleep]" 487 00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:32,655 Sorry. Okay, sorry. I'm going to be nice. 488 00:19:32,689 --> 00:19:33,344 No, I'm not. 489 00:19:43,137 --> 00:19:45,655 [producer] Eleven, and mark it please. 490 00:19:45,689 --> 00:19:48,413 So, I had a separate conversation with Robyn. 491 00:19:48,448 --> 00:19:49,965 Mm-hmm. 492 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:53,517 And then, I asked her to come to this conversation with Kody because-- 493 00:19:53,551 --> 00:19:54,586 [Sukanya] Oh, you asked her to be here? 494 00:19:54,620 --> 00:19:56,724 -Yeah, I asked her. -Wow. 495 00:19:56,758 --> 00:19:57,862 Why did you ask her? 496 00:19:57,896 --> 00:20:00,862 Because she speaks Kody. 497 00:20:00,896 --> 00:20:02,344 Do you think you speak Kody? 498 00:20:02,379 --> 00:20:03,344 You think you get Kody? 499 00:20:05,379 --> 00:20:07,379 I think I get Kody pretty well. 500 00:20:07,413 --> 00:20:09,758 Like, I feel like, I understand him, yeah. 501 00:20:09,793 --> 00:20:12,862 Do you think other wives get him, other Sister Wives? 502 00:20:12,896 --> 00:20:15,413 -I think they have the capacity to. -Yeah. 503 00:20:15,448 --> 00:20:17,241 I think sometimes they miss... 504 00:20:17,275 --> 00:20:19,068 He can be misunderstood very easily 505 00:20:19,103 --> 00:20:22,172 because he says everything that's in his head. 506 00:20:22,206 --> 00:20:23,931 Most people filter it, he doesn't. 507 00:20:25,172 --> 00:20:28,586 But I think that it's hard for other people to understand. 508 00:20:28,620 --> 00:20:30,103 Meri did ask her to be there. 509 00:20:30,137 --> 00:20:32,344 I know it's because Robyn says that she can speak Kody 510 00:20:32,379 --> 00:20:33,827 and I'm like, "Bull [bleep]" 511 00:20:33,862 --> 00:20:35,793 Sorry. Okay, sorry. I'm going to be nice. 512 00:20:35,827 --> 00:20:36,724 No, I'm not. 513 00:20:36,758 --> 00:20:39,103 I have known Kody for... 514 00:20:39,137 --> 00:20:41,206 I met him when I was 18. 515 00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:42,482 What, 32 years ago. 516 00:20:42,517 --> 00:20:44,275 I've known Kody for a long time. 517 00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:45,965 And I can actually read Kody pretty well 518 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,965 and I can speak Kody well, too. 519 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:50,103 But Robyn convinced all of us 520 00:20:50,758 --> 00:20:52,655 that she could speak Kody 521 00:20:52,689 --> 00:20:55,275 and that she would mediate our relationships. 522 00:20:55,310 --> 00:20:57,275 I haven't asked one time to mediate our relationship 523 00:20:57,310 --> 00:20:59,482 and I remember going, "No, no, no, no. 524 00:20:59,517 --> 00:21:01,827 Girl, you know him. You can talk to him yourself. 525 00:21:01,862 --> 00:21:03,413 You're just fine." 526 00:21:03,448 --> 00:21:06,206 She convinced all of us that she needed to be there in the relationship. 527 00:21:06,241 --> 00:21:07,586 That she can speak Kody and we can't. 528 00:21:08,379 --> 00:21:09,586 [chuckles] 529 00:21:09,620 --> 00:21:10,413 She always, like... 530 00:21:10,448 --> 00:21:12,275 It's always this Robyn speaks Kody. 531 00:21:12,310 --> 00:21:16,413 I'm like, "Well, I don't know if I really need someone to translate for me." 532 00:21:16,448 --> 00:21:17,724 We've been married a long time, 533 00:21:17,758 --> 00:21:19,206 we did okay without you. 534 00:21:19,241 --> 00:21:21,517 I think I speak Kody. 535 00:21:21,551 --> 00:21:23,724 But she likes to position herself as, like, "I speak Kody." 536 00:21:23,758 --> 00:21:25,551 She says that to my children. 537 00:21:25,586 --> 00:21:27,241 Wanting to come over, 538 00:21:27,275 --> 00:21:29,344 like, in the past, she said, "Why don't you have a conversation with your dad? 539 00:21:29,379 --> 00:21:31,724 -I'll be there 'cause, you know, I speak Kody." -Mm-hmm. 540 00:21:31,758 --> 00:21:33,103 And my kids are like, "It's our dad. 541 00:21:33,137 --> 00:21:34,896 We don't really need you to speak Kody." 542 00:21:34,931 --> 00:21:36,896 It does bug me, that one does bug me. 543 00:21:36,931 --> 00:21:38,689 -Mm-hmm. -[Janelle] I speak Kody. 544 00:21:38,724 --> 00:21:40,482 Well, Kody can speak for himself. 545 00:21:40,517 --> 00:21:41,517 He's a grown-ass man. 546 00:21:42,551 --> 00:21:43,965 I just have to own my truth 547 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,172 and if that truth hurts him, 548 00:21:47,034 --> 00:21:48,689 you know, I'm sorry for that. 549 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:52,551 And I completely accept the fact 550 00:21:52,586 --> 00:21:54,137 that he's gonna do the same thing. 551 00:21:54,172 --> 00:21:56,862 There's gonna be things that he's gonna say that are gonna really hurt me 552 00:21:56,896 --> 00:21:58,103 and I'll get mad about it 553 00:21:58,137 --> 00:22:00,931 and I'll just have to deal with it. 554 00:22:00,965 --> 00:22:02,413 Yeah, but something that he has said 555 00:22:02,448 --> 00:22:03,758 that has really hurt you. 556 00:22:03,793 --> 00:22:04,758 [sighs] 557 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:07,000 Um... 558 00:22:08,206 --> 00:22:10,344 Well, in that clip, 559 00:22:10,379 --> 00:22:11,862 -you know, when-- -[Sukanya] Oh, the barndominium? 560 00:22:11,896 --> 00:22:13,965 Yeah, "Let's see. Let's put you out in the barn." 561 00:22:15,482 --> 00:22:18,689 You know, that wasn't very nice. 562 00:22:18,724 --> 00:22:21,413 You know, but it's also, it's what he feels. 563 00:22:21,448 --> 00:22:26,000 You know, like, I can't, like, fault him for saying what he feels. 564 00:22:26,034 --> 00:22:28,551 And then, the way you interpreted it, 565 00:22:28,586 --> 00:22:31,206 saying like, "Oh, I'm back there with all the clothes that-- 566 00:22:31,241 --> 00:22:32,551 All right! 567 00:22:32,586 --> 00:22:35,068 The car that he drives only in the summertime and, you know-- 568 00:22:35,103 --> 00:22:37,620 But then, when he was like, you know, 569 00:22:37,655 --> 00:22:39,620 "Robyn, don't put this pressure on me 570 00:22:39,655 --> 00:22:42,034 of the fact that we're a family 571 00:22:42,068 --> 00:22:43,034 'cause we're not. 572 00:22:43,068 --> 00:22:45,172 You know, there's this cognitive dissonance. 573 00:22:45,206 --> 00:22:49,241 And I'm like, "Well, maybe you should have communicated that we weren't." 574 00:22:49,275 --> 00:22:51,724 And then, maybe I wouldn't be acting 575 00:22:51,758 --> 00:22:55,310 like I'm trying to still be part of the family. 576 00:22:55,344 --> 00:22:57,379 I saw your reaction to the barndominium. 577 00:22:58,758 --> 00:23:00,724 Oh, how insulting. Oh, good God. 578 00:23:00,758 --> 00:23:02,517 How insulting is that? 579 00:23:02,551 --> 00:23:06,655 "Why don't you live with all of my garbage 580 00:23:06,689 --> 00:23:09,103 and all of the stuff I don't really want. 581 00:23:09,137 --> 00:23:11,965 We can make it look really cool. 582 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:15,275 Let's have the perception of something cool. 583 00:23:15,310 --> 00:23:18,448 But really, what you're going to be is sleeping with my garbage 584 00:23:18,482 --> 00:23:20,275 and the stuff I don't really care about." 585 00:23:20,310 --> 00:23:22,448 That was one of the most insulting things I've ever heard. 586 00:23:22,482 --> 00:23:24,896 And I think he was thinking, he was being benevolent. 587 00:23:24,931 --> 00:23:26,517 She stuck around. 588 00:23:26,551 --> 00:23:28,655 And for him just to discard her like that. 589 00:23:28,689 --> 00:23:29,344 [Sukanya] Mm-hmm. 590 00:23:30,448 --> 00:23:31,896 What do you think about the whole ring thing? 591 00:23:31,931 --> 00:23:35,137 [laughing] The ring thing is so funny. 592 00:23:35,172 --> 00:23:36,310 Meri noticed it right away. 593 00:23:36,344 --> 00:23:38,241 Oh, okay, that's because there's a backstory here. 594 00:23:38,275 --> 00:23:40,689 And I don't know, I don't feel like it's all the way my place, 595 00:23:40,724 --> 00:23:41,896 but here we are. 596 00:23:41,931 --> 00:23:44,310 So, Kody and Meri had a wedding ring 597 00:23:44,344 --> 00:23:46,724 that right... I... 598 00:23:46,758 --> 00:23:49,793 Robyn was in the picture, I don't know if they were married quite yet. 599 00:23:49,827 --> 00:23:51,827 He melted down the ring, 600 00:23:51,862 --> 00:23:54,379 saved the gold, saved the diamonds. 601 00:23:54,413 --> 00:23:55,724 Well, Meri found out. 602 00:23:55,758 --> 00:23:57,827 She was like, "Where's my ring? You don't wearing it anymore?" 603 00:23:57,862 --> 00:23:59,206 He's like, "I melted it down." 604 00:23:59,241 --> 00:24:00,344 Just like that. 605 00:24:00,379 --> 00:24:02,137 And I was like... 606 00:24:02,172 --> 00:24:05,379 He's like, "I didn't want Meri to have control over me and power over me anymore." 607 00:24:05,413 --> 00:24:08,275 I'm like, "It's still your wedding ring. 608 00:24:08,310 --> 00:24:13,482 It's what you've had for 15, however many years, right? 609 00:24:13,517 --> 00:24:15,724 So, we all got together and we got him a ring. 610 00:24:15,758 --> 00:24:17,000 And we bought him a ring together. 611 00:24:17,034 --> 00:24:18,551 It was a cotter ring. 612 00:24:18,586 --> 00:24:20,344 We all went in on the design, the four of us. 613 00:24:20,379 --> 00:24:21,517 We got him the ring, 614 00:24:21,551 --> 00:24:23,241 and that's what he wore for a long time. 615 00:24:23,275 --> 00:24:26,000 And then, he designed his own ring with Robyn. 616 00:24:26,034 --> 00:24:27,827 He and Robyn designed a ring together that he wore. 617 00:24:27,862 --> 00:24:30,655 I'm like, "Okay, whatever, we can all see what it's like." 618 00:24:30,689 --> 00:24:32,448 And so, him having a new ring now, 619 00:24:32,482 --> 00:24:33,551 I'm sure from Robyn. 620 00:24:33,586 --> 00:24:35,241 I'm sure they went together and bought a ring 621 00:24:35,275 --> 00:24:37,965 because maybe it's signifying a new beginning for them 622 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,344 or new things or something like that. 623 00:24:39,379 --> 00:24:40,137 I don't know. 624 00:24:51,517 --> 00:24:52,896 Um... [clears throat] 625 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:06,000 I am extremely frustrated right now. 626 00:25:07,586 --> 00:25:08,551 Beyond. 627 00:25:10,206 --> 00:25:11,827 Um... [clears throat] 628 00:25:13,655 --> 00:25:16,620 After we did the taping 629 00:25:16,655 --> 00:25:18,655 for the One On Oneinterviews with Suki... 630 00:25:20,965 --> 00:25:25,068 I found out that a story was brought up about me. 631 00:25:25,103 --> 00:25:27,655 That is not a story that I have ever shared publicly. 632 00:25:28,655 --> 00:25:30,172 That is my story to tell 633 00:25:31,275 --> 00:25:34,620 when, where and how I want to. 634 00:25:34,655 --> 00:25:38,172 And somebody else took it upon themselves to tell that story. 635 00:25:38,206 --> 00:25:41,172 And now, I'm being forced to talk about it. 636 00:25:42,586 --> 00:25:44,034 I'm not happy about it. 637 00:25:46,517 --> 00:25:48,482 It was not Christine's business to tell. 638 00:25:49,551 --> 00:25:51,862 She can laugh about it all she wants, 639 00:25:51,896 --> 00:25:54,517 but it was not her business to tell. 640 00:25:54,551 --> 00:25:58,275 If I wanted to have shared that story in the last 13 years 641 00:25:58,896 --> 00:26:00,379 in a public way, 642 00:26:00,413 --> 00:26:02,620 I would have done that. 643 00:26:02,655 --> 00:26:04,448 She doesn't get to come on here 644 00:26:04,482 --> 00:26:07,275 and tell my story 645 00:26:08,758 --> 00:26:10,517 without me even knowing it. 646 00:26:11,068 --> 00:26:12,827 And me finding out later 647 00:26:12,862 --> 00:26:13,931 that this is what happened. 648 00:26:13,965 --> 00:26:16,413 And so, now I feel like my hand is being forced 649 00:26:16,448 --> 00:26:18,551 and I have to tell my story. 650 00:26:22,724 --> 00:26:24,482 So right around the time 651 00:26:24,517 --> 00:26:26,310 that Robyn came into the family 652 00:26:26,344 --> 00:26:28,758 and I honestly, I cannot remember 653 00:26:29,931 --> 00:26:32,275 if she was married or if they were dating, 654 00:26:32,310 --> 00:26:35,000 I want to say that they were just dating or courting. 655 00:26:35,034 --> 00:26:37,172 And he had kind of talked about... 656 00:26:37,206 --> 00:26:39,965 Kody had kind of talked about 657 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:44,724 not wearing the wedding ring that I gave to him anymore. 658 00:26:44,758 --> 00:26:46,517 And it was right around that same time. 659 00:26:48,034 --> 00:26:50,034 He had told me 660 00:26:50,068 --> 00:26:53,310 that he did not want me to have claim on him. 661 00:26:54,689 --> 00:26:57,275 He didn't think that it was fair that I had claim on him. 662 00:26:57,862 --> 00:26:59,344 And so, 663 00:26:59,379 --> 00:27:02,862 his way of doing that was to melt down the wedding ring. 664 00:27:05,172 --> 00:27:06,689 That was a symbol, 665 00:27:06,724 --> 00:27:08,482 that was a sign of... 666 00:27:10,137 --> 00:27:11,793 like, our marriage and our commitment 667 00:27:11,827 --> 00:27:12,620 and he... 668 00:27:13,689 --> 00:27:14,827 melted it down. 669 00:27:18,172 --> 00:27:20,827 Who's to say that he didn't just melt down 670 00:27:20,862 --> 00:27:22,758 our whole relationship in that moment. 671 00:27:24,586 --> 00:27:27,586 Symbolically, that's what he did to me. 672 00:27:31,517 --> 00:27:33,068 Because I remember asking him, 673 00:27:33,103 --> 00:27:34,379 "If you're not gonna wear it, 674 00:27:34,413 --> 00:27:37,000 can I just have it? Can I keep it?" 675 00:27:37,931 --> 00:27:39,172 "Oh, no, I melted it down. 676 00:27:39,206 --> 00:27:41,000 I didn't want you to have any claim on me." 677 00:27:45,448 --> 00:27:46,310 [sniffles] 678 00:27:53,655 --> 00:27:56,655 It was a very, very painful situation. 679 00:27:56,689 --> 00:28:01,551 This thing with Kody telling me that I didn't have any claim on him 680 00:28:02,241 --> 00:28:03,551 or on our marriage, 681 00:28:03,586 --> 00:28:05,103 and him melting down 682 00:28:06,482 --> 00:28:07,586 like a symbol, 683 00:28:07,620 --> 00:28:10,793 like a very important symbol of our marriage 684 00:28:11,344 --> 00:28:12,241 happened... 685 00:28:14,655 --> 00:28:19,586 probably seven years prior to the catfishing. 686 00:28:19,620 --> 00:28:23,517 And I spent those seven years trying to like, 687 00:28:23,551 --> 00:28:25,620 be in this relationship with Kody 688 00:28:25,655 --> 00:28:28,344 that he did not want to be in with me. 689 00:28:30,965 --> 00:28:35,793 Was it things like that that had happened throughout all these years 690 00:28:37,310 --> 00:28:41,172 leading up to me just wanting to have a friend... 691 00:28:43,310 --> 00:28:45,724 'Cause Lord knows I didn't have any in my family. 692 00:28:49,758 --> 00:28:51,344 Christine shared this... 693 00:28:52,413 --> 00:28:55,758 -Okay. -...that when they all were together 694 00:28:55,793 --> 00:28:58,068 -when you came into the picture, -[Robyn] 695 00:28:58,103 --> 00:29:00,137 Meri had given him a gold ring, 696 00:29:00,172 --> 00:29:02,482 and then he kind of wore that gold ring. 697 00:29:02,517 --> 00:29:05,551 But then, he melted down the gold ring 698 00:29:05,586 --> 00:29:06,965 that Meri had given him 699 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:08,448 when you came into-- 700 00:29:08,482 --> 00:29:11,206 -No, he had done that before I came along. -Okay. 701 00:29:11,241 --> 00:29:13,448 [Robyn] It wasn't when I came in the family. 702 00:29:13,482 --> 00:29:15,103 It was way before that, 703 00:29:15,137 --> 00:29:18,758 'cause he wasn't wearing a wedding ring 704 00:29:18,793 --> 00:29:20,379 -when I met him. -[Sukanya] Oh, okay. 705 00:29:20,413 --> 00:29:22,206 The other thing is your ring. 706 00:29:22,241 --> 00:29:23,517 -Remember, Meri pointed it out. -Yeah. 707 00:29:23,551 --> 00:29:25,517 She said, "Oh, what about the ring? I'm staring at your ring." 708 00:29:25,551 --> 00:29:26,448 Tell me about the ring. 709 00:29:28,689 --> 00:29:31,482 -I just saw this really cool ring. -Okay. 710 00:29:31,517 --> 00:29:33,172 It was way nicer. 711 00:29:33,206 --> 00:29:35,103 I went, "That's cool, I want that." 712 00:29:35,137 --> 00:29:36,413 And it was over here 713 00:29:36,448 --> 00:29:38,103 and my wedding ring was on 714 00:29:38,137 --> 00:29:40,724 and some things happened 715 00:29:40,758 --> 00:29:41,827 and I went... 716 00:29:43,206 --> 00:29:46,172 you know, I just went, "Those relationships are over." 717 00:29:47,758 --> 00:29:49,206 And went like this. 718 00:29:49,241 --> 00:29:50,965 And I went, "You know, like, if I could save 719 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:52,172 my relationship with Janelle, 720 00:29:52,206 --> 00:29:55,275 that's the only one that's got any potential left now. 721 00:29:56,448 --> 00:29:58,206 Wow, so, you took the cotter ring off 722 00:29:58,241 --> 00:29:59,586 -just to say-- -"Yeah, the cotter ring is off, I'm done." 723 00:30:00,241 --> 00:30:01,413 It's a new beginning. 724 00:30:02,103 --> 00:30:03,137 [Sukanya] Coming up... 725 00:30:03,172 --> 00:30:05,137 Like, "Why don't you just say the words finally? 726 00:30:05,172 --> 00:30:06,482 Why don't you just tell me?" 727 00:30:06,517 --> 00:30:07,793 He's not saying it. 728 00:30:07,827 --> 00:30:11,034 He just says the things that are not kind. 729 00:30:11,068 --> 00:30:13,448 And I'm not gonna just be like, 730 00:30:13,482 --> 00:30:16,034 "Well, you're a jerk, so I'm leaving." 731 00:30:16,068 --> 00:30:18,137 -"Meri, what do you need in this marriage... -Right. 732 00:30:18,896 --> 00:30:20,827 ...I can't give you that. 733 00:30:20,862 --> 00:30:22,206 We can fake through this. 734 00:30:22,241 --> 00:30:25,896 And I'm willing to actually put more effort into that fake 735 00:30:25,931 --> 00:30:26,793 if you want to." 736 00:30:36,793 --> 00:30:39,172 What weren't you receiving 737 00:30:39,206 --> 00:30:41,862 when he's putting that out there? 738 00:30:41,896 --> 00:30:45,172 I know the kind of person that he can be. 739 00:30:45,724 --> 00:30:46,862 I've seen it. 740 00:30:46,896 --> 00:30:49,827 I've seen the kind Kody Brown. 741 00:30:49,862 --> 00:30:53,103 I've seen the happy Kody Brown. 742 00:30:53,137 --> 00:30:57,034 -I've seen the giving and the loving Kody Brown. -Mm-hmm. 743 00:30:57,068 --> 00:31:02,103 And I fully expected that to come back around. 744 00:31:02,137 --> 00:31:02,827 Hm. 745 00:31:04,551 --> 00:31:06,344 But instead you're in the barndominium. 746 00:31:06,379 --> 00:31:08,965 Oh, I'm not. I am not in a barndominium. 747 00:31:10,206 --> 00:31:12,034 It's just those kinds of things 748 00:31:12,068 --> 00:31:15,206 that led me closer and closer and closer to be like, 749 00:31:15,241 --> 00:31:19,103 "Really, like, why don't you just say the words finally? 750 00:31:19,137 --> 00:31:20,896 Why don't you just tell me? 751 00:31:20,931 --> 00:31:22,241 Instead of all this... 752 00:31:26,103 --> 00:31:27,586 I don't even know. 753 00:31:27,620 --> 00:31:29,896 It's like, he's not saying it. 754 00:31:29,931 --> 00:31:33,137 He just says the things that are not kind. 755 00:31:33,172 --> 00:31:35,482 And I'm not gonna just be like, 756 00:31:35,517 --> 00:31:37,931 "Well, you're a jerk, so I'm leaving 757 00:31:38,586 --> 00:31:40,000 this committed marriage. 758 00:31:40,034 --> 00:31:43,862 I take my commitment more serious than that. 759 00:31:43,896 --> 00:31:45,931 So, in our faith, 760 00:31:46,689 --> 00:31:48,655 when we got married, 761 00:31:48,689 --> 00:31:50,172 when he and I got married, 762 00:31:50,206 --> 00:31:54,379 it was a marriage of an eternal nature. 763 00:31:54,413 --> 00:31:57,448 So, after so many years 764 00:31:57,482 --> 00:32:00,758 of him not coming around and him, like... 765 00:32:00,793 --> 00:32:04,310 for lack of a better word, abandoning me emotionally, 766 00:32:04,344 --> 00:32:05,137 you know, like... 767 00:32:06,862 --> 00:32:09,310 And then, saying all these mean things. 768 00:32:09,344 --> 00:32:10,172 Yeah. 769 00:32:10,206 --> 00:32:11,517 It's very, very hurtful 770 00:32:11,551 --> 00:32:13,344 and it just leads to me 771 00:32:13,379 --> 00:32:17,482 when I'm ready to do the move for my clothing business 772 00:32:17,517 --> 00:32:18,689 up to the B&B. 773 00:32:19,896 --> 00:32:22,103 I wanted to do it. 774 00:32:22,137 --> 00:32:24,689 The real damage here is, like, anything that I say 775 00:32:24,724 --> 00:32:26,724 is gonna be like, ripping that wound back open 776 00:32:26,758 --> 00:32:28,103 and I just don't want to say it. 777 00:32:28,137 --> 00:32:30,586 It's like I love her 778 00:32:30,620 --> 00:32:32,896 and want her to have a happy life. 779 00:32:32,931 --> 00:32:37,034 But I don't think her and I can functionally be in a relationship 780 00:32:37,758 --> 00:32:39,482 of marriage. 781 00:32:39,517 --> 00:32:42,206 There's other big conversation that happened at this moment, too. 782 00:32:42,241 --> 00:32:46,137 This is the conversation between you, Meri and Robyn, 783 00:32:46,793 --> 00:32:50,103 where basically, it was over 784 00:32:50,137 --> 00:32:52,310 and it was a difficult time, it was a pivotal moment. 785 00:32:52,344 --> 00:32:55,000 This one's pivotal, I am aware, let's go. 786 00:32:56,172 --> 00:32:58,275 [Mire] 787 00:33:00,137 --> 00:33:02,862 -What needs to be talked about? -You and me. 788 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:06,931 Meri, we have had those discussions. 789 00:33:07,586 --> 00:33:08,724 [Meri sighs] 790 00:33:09,724 --> 00:33:10,586 Yeah. 791 00:33:11,931 --> 00:33:15,793 [Kody] 792 00:33:15,827 --> 00:33:17,448 Yeah, they're very clear. 793 00:33:19,448 --> 00:33:20,931 He said, "Don't you understand, Meri, 794 00:33:20,965 --> 00:33:23,172 this is never going to happen. 795 00:33:23,206 --> 00:33:25,931 I have no interest in having a relationship with you. 796 00:33:25,965 --> 00:33:29,172 Your life is not one that I wanna insert myself into. 797 00:33:30,448 --> 00:33:32,275 Like, I'll never forget those words. 798 00:33:32,310 --> 00:33:35,103 You've been feeling like we would reconcile. 799 00:33:35,137 --> 00:33:38,310 I have felt like 800 00:33:39,551 --> 00:33:41,034 that we could, 801 00:33:41,068 --> 00:33:42,413 if given the chance, 802 00:33:43,034 --> 00:33:44,758 learn who each other are, 803 00:33:44,793 --> 00:33:47,241 like, re-learn who we are now. 804 00:33:47,275 --> 00:33:50,965 Because I don't think that we know who we are now. 805 00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:54,965 When he told me that he has no desire to ever work on our relationship 806 00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,965 and for our marriage 807 00:33:58,724 --> 00:34:00,275 to ever heal, 808 00:34:00,310 --> 00:34:05,862 like that was very, very painful for me. 809 00:34:05,896 --> 00:34:08,516 And I felt my heart, like, really speeding up 810 00:34:08,551 --> 00:34:09,655 because I'm like... 811 00:34:12,172 --> 00:34:14,000 "But you promised." 812 00:34:14,034 --> 00:34:15,034 You know? 813 00:34:15,068 --> 00:34:15,965 [sniffles] 814 00:34:24,447 --> 00:34:26,379 [Kody] I'm trying to be totally honest. 815 00:34:26,413 --> 00:34:30,620 You want something that we can't have together. 816 00:34:31,551 --> 00:34:34,516 Time changes and things, you know, like, 817 00:34:34,551 --> 00:34:36,931 what you're looking for is something very different 818 00:34:36,965 --> 00:34:37,896 and it was... 819 00:34:39,516 --> 00:34:41,000 I sort of felt like, there was... 820 00:34:43,655 --> 00:34:46,206 A lot of what was there was just naivety. 821 00:34:46,241 --> 00:34:48,447 And I was sincere three years ago 822 00:34:48,482 --> 00:34:50,413 when I was saying, "Let's see if we can make this work." 823 00:34:50,447 --> 00:34:51,379 [Meri] Four years ago. 824 00:34:51,413 --> 00:34:52,241 Four years ago. 825 00:34:52,275 --> 00:34:54,000 And I was very confused 826 00:34:55,068 --> 00:34:57,862 why nothing ever happened after that. 827 00:34:57,896 --> 00:35:01,689 I was so excited at that anniversary when you said that. 828 00:35:01,724 --> 00:35:04,103 At our first anniversary here in Flagstaff, 829 00:35:04,137 --> 00:35:07,517 he's like, "Cheers to a new beginning." 830 00:35:08,275 --> 00:35:09,172 Well... 831 00:35:09,965 --> 00:35:11,965 nothing really happened. 832 00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:14,931 And by our next anniversary, 833 00:35:14,965 --> 00:35:17,931 which was the year of COVID... [laughs nervously] 834 00:35:18,931 --> 00:35:20,103 ...we went out on a drive 835 00:35:20,137 --> 00:35:21,827 and it started this whole conversation 836 00:35:21,862 --> 00:35:23,103 and it was... 837 00:35:24,068 --> 00:35:26,862 It was a pretty intense conversation. 838 00:35:26,896 --> 00:35:28,586 No, I told you 839 00:35:28,620 --> 00:35:30,206 that I didn't think it was gonna work. 840 00:35:30,241 --> 00:35:33,137 [Meri] You were not, I did not feel like... 841 00:35:35,241 --> 00:35:36,965 that you were very clear on it 842 00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:39,206 and, like, definite with it with me 843 00:35:40,310 --> 00:35:42,344 until this year on our anniversary, 844 00:35:43,275 --> 00:35:44,275 like, six months ago, 845 00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:46,310 seven months ago, whenever. 846 00:35:47,896 --> 00:35:50,551 I didn't know it was a definite until then. 847 00:35:51,758 --> 00:35:53,310 Hm. 848 00:35:53,344 --> 00:35:57,172 [Meri] And then, when you said you didn't consider yourself married to me, 849 00:35:57,206 --> 00:35:58,448 I was like, "Okay." 850 00:36:01,206 --> 00:36:02,344 I didn't know that either. 851 00:36:03,965 --> 00:36:06,793 I saw him say publicly, 852 00:36:06,827 --> 00:36:09,137 "I don't even consider marrying my wife. 853 00:36:09,172 --> 00:36:11,655 And if she were to go find another guy, 854 00:36:11,689 --> 00:36:12,793 it wouldn't bother me." 855 00:36:14,482 --> 00:36:16,689 And that was a turning point for me. 856 00:36:19,448 --> 00:36:20,724 Am I being fair with you? 857 00:36:21,862 --> 00:36:23,965 You've been honest with me. 858 00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:26,068 You're being kind and I appreciate that. 859 00:36:29,413 --> 00:36:31,413 Doesn't mean I'm not mad at you for... 860 00:36:37,965 --> 00:36:40,068 not giving me what we promised each other. 861 00:36:43,724 --> 00:36:45,379 I know that you don't feel 862 00:36:47,758 --> 00:36:49,724 or consider yourself married to me. 863 00:36:51,206 --> 00:36:53,931 -[Robyn] -[Mire laughs] 864 00:37:00,068 --> 00:37:02,275 Hey, he feels it. 865 00:37:02,310 --> 00:37:03,827 And that's fair for him to say. 866 00:37:03,862 --> 00:37:05,413 Kody and I disagree on this, 867 00:37:05,448 --> 00:37:07,620 but I don't think that he has. 868 00:37:09,379 --> 00:37:13,275 -[Meri] Okay-- -This is the agreement you required of me 869 00:37:13,310 --> 00:37:15,068 in order to get married. 870 00:37:17,896 --> 00:37:20,586 This agreement that I gave you, 871 00:37:21,448 --> 00:37:23,448 our sacred covenant 872 00:37:25,413 --> 00:37:29,413 was if I'm ever not in love with you, 873 00:37:29,448 --> 00:37:31,172 I won't just sit there 874 00:37:31,206 --> 00:37:33,379 and be in a pathetic place with you. 875 00:37:34,758 --> 00:37:37,068 You made me promise you that. 876 00:37:40,241 --> 00:37:42,655 But that doesn't mean the marriage is over. 877 00:37:44,551 --> 00:37:46,724 [Meri] How is it fair to be in a marriage 878 00:37:46,758 --> 00:37:49,413 when there's nothing there? 879 00:37:51,275 --> 00:37:53,241 I can't do it one-sided, Robyn. 880 00:37:56,206 --> 00:37:57,172 I've tried. 881 00:38:06,103 --> 00:38:07,586 I know, I know. 882 00:38:13,827 --> 00:38:16,103 [Mire] And I'm not gonna continue living lonely either. 883 00:38:18,620 --> 00:38:19,448 It's not fair to me. 884 00:38:23,379 --> 00:38:24,241 So, walk me through that. 885 00:38:24,275 --> 00:38:27,275 How did we get here to this point 886 00:38:27,310 --> 00:38:30,655 where we're looking at you and Meri-- 887 00:38:30,689 --> 00:38:33,034 Yeah, I think Meri and I had a conversation 888 00:38:33,965 --> 00:38:35,620 that day or the day before, 889 00:38:36,275 --> 00:38:37,931 in private. 890 00:38:37,965 --> 00:38:40,241 Or it's just a little bit more of an awareness. 891 00:38:40,275 --> 00:38:41,931 -Mm. -[Kody] It was just like, 892 00:38:41,965 --> 00:38:45,310 this is the issue in a breakup. 893 00:38:45,862 --> 00:38:47,413 Meri wants love 894 00:38:47,448 --> 00:38:49,758 in a specific format, in a specific way, 895 00:38:49,793 --> 00:38:51,310 it's something that she wants. 896 00:38:51,344 --> 00:38:53,551 And I have a different kind of love 897 00:38:53,586 --> 00:38:56,137 and a specific way and format for her. 898 00:38:56,172 --> 00:38:59,172 And it was more like, "Meri, what you need in this marriage..." 899 00:38:59,206 --> 00:39:01,758 This conversation happened before the one where we break up. 900 00:39:01,793 --> 00:39:04,482 -Yeah. -"Meri, what do you need in this marriage, 901 00:39:05,310 --> 00:39:07,275 I can't give you that. 902 00:39:07,310 --> 00:39:08,620 We can fake through this. 903 00:39:08,655 --> 00:39:10,275 And I'm willing to actually 904 00:39:10,310 --> 00:39:13,586 put more effort into that fake if you want to, 905 00:39:13,620 --> 00:39:17,103 but what you're asking for, I don't have to give you 906 00:39:17,137 --> 00:39:19,068 and that's when she said, 907 00:39:21,517 --> 00:39:23,655 "I can't. I can't do that." 908 00:39:23,689 --> 00:39:24,620 [Sukanya] Coming up... 909 00:39:24,655 --> 00:39:27,482 In September is when I saw where he said, 910 00:39:27,517 --> 00:39:30,310 "I don't even consider her a wife," 911 00:39:30,344 --> 00:39:31,551 referring to me. 912 00:39:31,586 --> 00:39:34,517 She said that Kody never told her straight to her face. 913 00:39:34,551 --> 00:39:36,241 I guess because he told me so much, 914 00:39:36,275 --> 00:39:37,724 I figured he was telling her. 915 00:39:37,758 --> 00:39:41,689 If he wasn't then that's a really unfair and uncool thing to do. 916 00:39:49,241 --> 00:39:51,103 [Meri on tape] I can't do it one-sided, Robyn. 917 00:39:51,827 --> 00:39:52,827 I've tried. 918 00:39:58,965 --> 00:40:01,275 And I'm not gonna continue living lonely either. 919 00:40:01,931 --> 00:40:03,758 [sniffles] 920 00:40:03,793 --> 00:40:04,896 It's not fair to me. 921 00:40:07,310 --> 00:40:10,413 Okay, before we saw this, 922 00:40:10,448 --> 00:40:12,517 you mentioned that you kind of knew it was gonna happen, 923 00:40:12,551 --> 00:40:14,724 but you didn't know that it was gonna happen right there. 924 00:40:14,758 --> 00:40:15,931 Walk me through that. 925 00:40:15,965 --> 00:40:17,862 So, if you remember last year, 926 00:40:17,896 --> 00:40:20,103 when you and I were here talking about this, 927 00:40:20,137 --> 00:40:22,793 I had told you the story 928 00:40:22,827 --> 00:40:26,724 about how Kody and I had been out on a drive 929 00:40:26,758 --> 00:40:29,206 -on our anniversary. -[Sukanya] Yes. 930 00:40:29,241 --> 00:40:32,206 [Meri] That's when he and I had our very first conversation 931 00:40:33,517 --> 00:40:35,931 where he told me, "I'm not... 932 00:40:35,965 --> 00:40:39,758 I'm not going to be in a marriage with you. 933 00:40:39,793 --> 00:40:41,413 This is never gonna move forward." 934 00:40:41,448 --> 00:40:42,724 And I said to him, 935 00:40:42,758 --> 00:40:46,241 "Don't you think that we should address this publicly?" 936 00:40:46,275 --> 00:40:47,551 He's like, "No, I don't want to. 937 00:40:47,586 --> 00:40:49,344 I just, I don't want to, I don't need... 938 00:40:50,586 --> 00:40:53,448 I don't need that kind of... 939 00:40:56,172 --> 00:40:57,172 criticism." 940 00:40:57,206 --> 00:40:58,758 He says, "I don't need that kind of criticism. 941 00:40:58,793 --> 00:41:00,448 I don't want to address it publicly." 942 00:41:01,965 --> 00:41:03,482 So, that was in April. 943 00:41:04,517 --> 00:41:06,655 And then, in September 944 00:41:06,689 --> 00:41:08,931 is when I saw where he said... 945 00:41:11,482 --> 00:41:14,482 "I don't even consider her a wife," 946 00:41:14,517 --> 00:41:16,379 referring to me. 947 00:41:16,413 --> 00:41:20,931 This clip is maybe a month or two after that 948 00:41:20,965 --> 00:41:23,551 where he and I did continue 949 00:41:23,586 --> 00:41:25,620 to have a couple of conversations, 950 00:41:25,655 --> 00:41:28,275 but he still wasn't really wanting to do it publicly. 951 00:41:28,310 --> 00:41:30,000 And I didn't think that was fair. 952 00:41:30,034 --> 00:41:32,448 I felt like it was something that needed to be documented. 953 00:41:33,137 --> 00:41:34,965 But he did say it publicly, 954 00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:36,862 he didn't say it to you publicly. 955 00:41:36,896 --> 00:41:38,965 Correct, correct. 956 00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:40,344 And that's where you had an issue. 957 00:41:40,379 --> 00:41:43,931 I was owed that. 958 00:41:43,965 --> 00:41:49,103 I was owed him having that conversation with me publicly, 959 00:41:49,137 --> 00:41:51,965 instead of seeing it after the fact. 960 00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:55,310 I didn't want that to be... 961 00:41:55,344 --> 00:41:57,137 -a big deal breaker for you guys. -No, I appreciate that. 962 00:41:57,172 --> 00:41:58,689 No, it was... 963 00:41:58,724 --> 00:42:01,931 I mean, honestly, it wasn't even the conversation that he had with you. 964 00:42:01,965 --> 00:42:05,206 It was scenes that I had just seen 965 00:42:05,241 --> 00:42:08,241 that we showed right here that day. 966 00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:10,586 I don't really consider myself married to Meri. 967 00:42:11,793 --> 00:42:13,827 I just, if she wanted to... 968 00:42:13,862 --> 00:42:15,965 If she wanted to move on and marry another, 969 00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:18,448 she wouldn't get in an argument with me. 970 00:42:18,482 --> 00:42:20,689 Like, if you remember, I said to you, 971 00:42:20,724 --> 00:42:21,793 I haven't seen... Yeah. 972 00:42:21,827 --> 00:42:24,931 -I just had seen from last year. -[Sukanya] Yeah. 973 00:42:24,965 --> 00:42:27,551 I said, "I literally just saw that a week ago. 974 00:42:27,586 --> 00:42:29,034 I'm still trying to process it 975 00:42:29,068 --> 00:42:31,275 and I need to figure out what I need to do." 976 00:42:31,310 --> 00:42:34,275 I don't know why Meri hasn't left before now. 977 00:42:34,310 --> 00:42:35,172 I would have. 978 00:42:36,206 --> 00:42:38,137 It's been apparent. 979 00:42:38,172 --> 00:42:41,103 She said that Kody never told her straight to her face. 980 00:42:42,275 --> 00:42:43,724 [Janelle] I mean, I-- 981 00:42:43,758 --> 00:42:45,206 And that's what she was waiting for. 982 00:42:45,241 --> 00:42:47,103 I mean, I guess, because he told me so much, 983 00:42:47,137 --> 00:42:50,379 I figured, he was telling her. I don't know. 984 00:42:50,413 --> 00:42:54,758 If he wasn't, then that's a really unfair and uncool thing to do. 985 00:42:54,793 --> 00:42:56,758 Did you pick up the phone and just call him? 986 00:42:56,793 --> 00:42:58,517 I don't think he would have heard me. 987 00:42:58,551 --> 00:42:59,758 -[Sukanya] Really? -Mm-mm. 988 00:42:59,793 --> 00:43:01,689 But isn't it not about him hearing you, 989 00:43:01,724 --> 00:43:03,310 isn't it about you being heard? 990 00:43:05,517 --> 00:43:06,793 Oh, my voice will be heard. 991 00:43:07,448 --> 00:43:09,000 I will no longer be silent. 992 00:43:11,034 --> 00:43:13,241 [Sukanya] Next time onSister Wives One On One... 993 00:43:13,275 --> 00:43:14,793 I thought of myself 994 00:43:14,827 --> 00:43:16,896 leaving Robyn and having another lover 995 00:43:16,931 --> 00:43:17,965 and looking at this lover and going, 996 00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:19,482 "I don't love you. 997 00:43:19,517 --> 00:43:20,689 I'm in love with another woman. 998 00:43:20,724 --> 00:43:22,241 I'm in love with a woman that I left 999 00:43:22,275 --> 00:43:25,379 because I was too much of a piece of [bleep] to manage the relationship. 1000 00:43:25,413 --> 00:43:27,896 Would you still consider her a sister wife? 1001 00:43:27,931 --> 00:43:30,586 No, because when you're a sister wife, 1002 00:43:30,620 --> 00:43:32,206 it's because you're married to the same man, 1003 00:43:32,241 --> 00:43:33,551 and I am a single woman. 1004 00:43:34,344 --> 00:43:35,793 How do you see her? 1005 00:43:35,827 --> 00:43:37,793 [sobbing] She's my sister wife. 1006 00:43:40,275 --> 00:43:41,137 So is Janelle. 1007 00:43:42,206 --> 00:43:43,827 So is Christine. 1008 00:43:43,862 --> 00:43:47,896 No, I don't think that Robyn has any desire to live polygamy or plural marriage. 1009 00:43:47,931 --> 00:43:50,586 I don't think Christine knows Robyn at all. 1010 00:43:50,620 --> 00:43:52,827 She's never tried, she's never been there. 1011 00:43:52,862 --> 00:43:54,517 She was a [bleep] sister wife. 1012 00:43:54,551 --> 00:43:57,896 She'll probably and I hope be a very good wife for David. 1013 00:43:57,931 --> 00:44:01,827 I have looked back and I've dissected my relationship with Robyn. 1014 00:44:01,862 --> 00:44:03,862 Her personality type loves drama. 1015 00:44:03,896 --> 00:44:07,206 They love drama, they love talking about their drama. 1016 00:44:07,241 --> 00:44:09,275 Sorry, I don't know how to let this go. 1017 00:44:10,482 --> 00:44:12,517 And this isn't me just being dramatic. 1018 00:44:12,551 --> 00:44:13,655 Thank you, Christine. 1019 00:44:13,689 --> 00:44:15,000 Are you excited about the engagement? 1020 00:44:15,034 --> 00:44:17,344 Yes, I am excited about the engagement. 1021 00:44:17,379 --> 00:44:18,758 -Can you show off the ring? -Yes. 1022 00:44:18,793 --> 00:44:21,344 I met the love of my life, I did. 1023 00:44:21,379 --> 00:44:23,379 Christine has to destroy my character 1024 00:44:23,413 --> 00:44:26,034 or David doesn't feel like he can marry her 1025 00:44:26,068 --> 00:44:27,586 'cause she left a good man. 1026 00:44:27,620 --> 00:44:28,758 Hey, David, come on out. 1027 00:44:28,793 --> 00:44:30,000 You're gonna meet the love of my life. 1028 00:44:30,034 --> 00:44:30,758 He's amazing. 1029 00:44:30,793 --> 00:44:31,620 Hi, David.