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[narrator]
Previously on Sister Wives...
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Kody and I
are officially done.
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I'm upset that I was
neglected and abandoned,
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and the story
that he's been telling.
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He's a slob
and I'll leave him.
[laughs]
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He's gonna be
so mad at me
in this interview,
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and I'm kind of
not giving
a flying rat's ass.
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[Ysabel] Hello, Mama.
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Ysabel's going
to be moving
to Salt Lake.
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Not with me.
She's made it
very clear.
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-I think this one
qualifies as heavy.
-[laughs]
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The kids don't have
a great relationship
with Kody.
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Not all the wives have
a good relationship
with each other,
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so that's why
I wouldn't say
it's a plural family.
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I would say that what
Janelle and I have
is a sister wife family.
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Mykelti's pregnant with twins,
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and so we have
to have a party
to celebrate that.
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Hola, mi bambina.
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Mykelti's like,
"Dad and Robyn
are here."
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I'm like, "Okay, okay."
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And this little piggy
went "Hoo, hoo, hoo,
hee, hee, hee."
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I'm not gonna
necessarily say hi.
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That would mean
I was gonna be friendly,
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and I'm not.
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The divorce has put me in...
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I'll be honest,
a pretty dark place.
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[tense music playing]
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Just the failure
of the experience
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that was everything.
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All my goals.
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[Meri] I kind of suspect
that he's gonna
wake up
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one day and be like,
"Wow, what the hell
did I just do?"
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He's gonna be
accountable for that.
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Whether he likes it or not.
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[theme music playing]
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[upbeat music playing]
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Are you ready?
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So we just finished
moving Ysabel
to Salt Lake.
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We got her
into her new apartment.
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Maddie is six months pregnant
and she was using her big SUV
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to pull the trailer of stuff.
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Maddie and Caleb
have talked about
coming west.
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We've been dreaming
about buying
a piece of property.
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As we were driving across,
we found a couple
of listings for property
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that's not very far
from Salt Lake.
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So Maddie and I and
the grandbabies are gonna
go up and look at it.
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Thank you, Julie,
for letting me sleep
in your room.
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You're welcome.
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When Janelle and I
were in Idaho together
visiting my brothers
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on the way back,
Maddie and Caleb
started looking at property
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and sending her pictures
and calling Janelle
on the phone.
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And I listened
to all of it.
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Basically, if Maddie and Caleb
end up buying property,
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then Janelle was talking
about moving with them.
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-Have a safe drive.
-Thank you.
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-You bet. True.
-Have fun taking
Truely to school.
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So I'm like,
"So, are you,
like, leaving Kody?"
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That kind of... She's like,
"Well, yeah, yeah."
The woman doesn't share much.
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I don't want to overstep
or anything like that.
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I do want to overstep.
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But I really reigned it back
because I'm like,
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"That's a lot of information."
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[country music playing]
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Kody and I are not
in communication.
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Our relationship is over,
but we both still live
in Flagstaff.
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Yeah, there's not been
an official divorce.
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I don't know how to get one,
and I don't need one.
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I'm already like,
I'm already count--
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Like I'm counting myself
into this already. [laughs]
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But that's the plan,
I guess, right?
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I was like,
"Aren't we
buying it together?"
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Yes, we are.
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Like, I have this piece
in Flagstaff.
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Well, I don't know
if I really have it,
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-because...
-Yeah, what's going
on there?
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It's not paid off yet.
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The note is due in about...
Mmm, six months.
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And they keep asking
your dad and he's like,
"I'm not gonna
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make a plan till blah."
And then it's like,
"I'm not going to make a plan
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till blah,"
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So the first two-acre lot
right now is Kody and I.
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The second two-acre lot
is Kody and Robyn.
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The third is a four-acre lot,
and it's Meri,
myself and Kody.
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And then the five-acre lot,
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because Christine
quitclaimed it,
is Kody and Robyn.
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Robyn's got her house.
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Christine had her house.
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Meri has built a business,
but she didn't use
family money.
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She built that herself.
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So she and I are both, like...
This represents basically
the only asset
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we would be taking
from the marriage.
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So what happens
if you don't make the note?
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He, I mean, technically,
the guy can take back
the entire purchase.
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Which is idiotic.
I'm sure your...
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I'm sure your dad's gonna...
wanna pay that off, right?
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I mean...
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That's how the...
how it's written.
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The rest of our property
is collateral, um,
for the note.
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It's insane to me
that Kody is not taking
this more seriously.
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Well, Janelle asks me about
the property all the time,
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but I don't trust her anymore.
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And so I don't give
her any information.
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We will pay off the property
when the time comes.
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And I'm not giving you
any details about what
I'm doing or whatever,
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because I'm tired
of disclosing information
that goes through
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the gossip mill
of our broken family.
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He leaks like a sieve.
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He told me stuff about
his other relationships
and his other wives
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that I was like,
"I don't think you're supposed
to be telling me that."
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-I don't know.
-Is he having interest?
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Robyn's sitting on the house.
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-What are they gonna do
with that property?
-They say they wanna...
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They say they want...
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They say they want
to build out there.
I don't know.
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Here's the thing.
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I don't know if I...
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really want to be
next-door neighbors
with them.
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-I...
-Oh, yeah. No, I wouldn't.
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I would be great being
neighbors with Janelle
or Meri or even Christine,
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to be honest, um...
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I still have hopes
for Meri and Kody
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and definitely with
Janelle and Kody.
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I see it highly unlikely
that I would ever build
on the property.
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I mean, I'm kind of
in the middle of this
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separation from Kody
and from the family.
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And doesn't make sense
that I would end up
building out there.
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[Kody scoffs] We're never
going to be neighbors.
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Christine and I are never
going to be neighbors.
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Meri, I don't think
she would build
on Coyote Pass.
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She's always said, "I'm part
of this, part of this,"
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but, nah, I don't believe
she's going to.
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Janelle, I think,
would build
on Coyote Pass.
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And if Janelle builds
on Coyote Pass,
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then I've got to decide
if I'm going to be neighbors
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with somebody who pretty much
just said I'm done with you.
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Your dad always
has this weird way...
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-And give you... And then
you would take some.
-I would want four acres,
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-and we would sell it.
-Yeah.
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If that were to happen,
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if somehow we came in
and bought the debt,
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we would make sure Meri
got her share and Robyn
and Kody could take
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what was left because all
the family money helped buy
the house that Robyn's in,
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and they have an extra
lot there, so I feel
like that's kind of fair.
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I will always pretty much
want what's fair,
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and I feel like Meri
has been treated very badly
by Kody for years.
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And I just want
to make sure that
that doesn't carry forward
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into this property division.
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That would get you some
of the money back that you
put in for Robyn's equity.
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Yeah, I know.
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Back in the day.
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Our family used to run...
we would use all the resources
to help one person,
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then we would all rally
to support the other person.
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That's how it
always worked.
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Until the last
ten years or so.
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And all of sudden
it's been about,
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well, my estate and everybody
needs their own estate.
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[Robyn] The whole plan
at that point,
was for that home, my home,
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to be kind of an asset
for the family.
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Eventually, when I'm built
out on the property.
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It was never supposed
to end up being something
that was just mine.
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When I put the money
into the house, I said,
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"Well, I think it would
be fair if all of our names
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were on the the mortgage,"
and he's like," No, no,
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we need to protect,
you know...
protect Robyn's estate.
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She needs to have it
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so it's hers.
And so it's ours."
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So with me leaving
or trying to go somewhere
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and do something different,
I want my value
of the property,
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and I'd like to recoup
some of the money
I put into Robyn's house.
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I mean, it's like we were
working together for
so long and we didn't
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actually stop
working together until,
you know, just recently.
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When Janelle's bringing up,
oh, that Kody and I
owe her something.
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It's like, how do you...
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How do you calculate,
how do you figure that out?
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It's so confusing.
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I think it's ridiculous
you haven't paid off
that property yet.
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-Your dad's typical.
-How does he not have
the money to pay it?
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Because he says
we had all these
other debts,
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-but yet I've watched--
-What other debts?
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I've watched him add enough,
like he keeps buying assets
that he sits on.
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Trailers and blah, blah
and blah, blah, blah.
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I see all the art
on their walls.
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I see all these things
and that's fine.
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They can... I have money,
and I've spent it
on things, too.
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[Kody] Janelle took care
of her household.
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Christine took care
of her household.
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Robyn took care
of her household.
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Meri took care
of her household.
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Then I focused mostly on,
sort of getting the cars
for the kids,
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00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,734
you know, basically had
a fleet, insuring the cars
for the kids.
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Kody and Robyn
shared everything.
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They shared
the house payments.
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They shared the utilities,
they shared everything.
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I don't know how it worked
at Robyn's house.
I don't know.
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But I used to always
be surprised at how nice
her backyard was.
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It was completely finished
and there was always, like,
stuff at her house,
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and I'm like, "Wow, huh."
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00:09:24,567 --> 00:09:26,567
Kody and my money have...
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00:09:26,567 --> 00:09:31,767
has always been separate
up until Christine
and Janelle chose
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00:09:31,767 --> 00:09:34,967
and asked to be out
of the family financially.
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00:09:34,967 --> 00:09:36,934
I used to be
not so great with money.
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00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,433
When I was young,
I had hard knocks.
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00:09:39,500 --> 00:09:41,767
And then I learned,
during my divorce,
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00:09:41,767 --> 00:09:45,767
really how to budget myself
very, very well.
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You just must have had
a different priority
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00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:52,467
of where your money
was going to go
than I did. That's all.
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Like he doesn't prioritize
what I need or what I want,
you know?
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00:09:57,166 --> 00:09:58,433
Yeah.
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00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:01,533
I think after a while
I began to see it,
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00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,934
and my kids were getting
very angry about it.
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Like my adult children.
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00:10:04,667 --> 00:10:06,567
Like, "What the hell, Mom?"
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00:10:06,567 --> 00:10:11,266
[Kody] There's a lot
of misguided jealousy here,
a lot of trash talk.
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00:10:11,266 --> 00:10:12,667
Is it true?
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00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:14,767
Well, some of it
probably is.
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00:10:14,767 --> 00:10:17,300
But most of it's not.
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00:10:19,066 --> 00:10:21,066
[Janelle] Kody really did,
sort of, kind of
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00:10:21,066 --> 00:10:23,567
cut off communication
with Caleb and Maddie
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00:10:23,567 --> 00:10:26,333
when the family started
to really dissolve,
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00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:27,867
and the kids really
don't know who he is.
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He's not been out to visit,
he doesn't call.
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I have encouraged Kody
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00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:36,967
to work any relationship out
that he can with his kids,
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00:10:36,967 --> 00:10:39,567
but I guess it's been
a two way street.
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00:10:39,567 --> 00:10:43,033
Maddie hasn't been reaching
out to her dad, either.
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00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:45,266
Maddie is mama bear
to an extreme.
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00:10:45,266 --> 00:10:47,667
She has felt like
until he can be consistent
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00:10:47,667 --> 00:10:48,934
and show up
229
00:10:48,934 --> 00:10:52,166
and not be dramatic,
that she feels like
it's probably better
230
00:10:52,166 --> 00:10:54,066
if they don't know about him.
231
00:10:54,066 --> 00:10:55,667
And Maddie and Caleb
don't really have
232
00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:58,433
much relationship with him
because he doesn't call them.
233
00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:02,000
I do think it's smart for you
to move away from Flagstaff.
234
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,767
To be honest with you,
I didn't really cut off
communications with Madison.
235
00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:06,266
She cut them off with me.
236
00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:08,033
Every time I talked to her,
237
00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:10,767
it was a fish for gossip.
238
00:11:10,767 --> 00:11:12,133
And I got tired of it.
239
00:11:17,567 --> 00:11:19,467
[Toni] Are you gonna
make mud pies?
240
00:11:19,467 --> 00:11:20,533
[Janelle] I love
this property.
241
00:11:20,533 --> 00:11:23,367
It's like everything
that we had wanted in a piece.
242
00:11:23,367 --> 00:11:25,033
Maddie, look how big
this property is.
243
00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:26,200
It goes clear back.
244
00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:28,567
[Christine] Where do I need
to throw my support?
245
00:11:28,567 --> 00:11:29,967
Get out of Flagstaff.
246
00:11:29,967 --> 00:11:31,734
Move in with Maddie.
247
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:34,333
[Robyn] If Janelle
were to move,
it would devastate me.
248
00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,266
I don't know how
to let this all go,
and I am not
249
00:11:37,266 --> 00:11:38,834
letting go of Janelle.
250
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:41,200
[upbeat music playing]
251
00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:49,767
As Maddie and I
were coming
across country
252
00:11:49,767 --> 00:11:52,000
with Ysabel
to come back
to Salt Lake.
253
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,367
Maddie was just
looking up property,
254
00:11:54,367 --> 00:11:56,233
and we found this
and we were like,
255
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:58,667
"Oh, we need
to see this property."
256
00:11:58,667 --> 00:12:00,967
And so we started
making phone calls.
[laughs]
257
00:12:00,967 --> 00:12:03,467
The real estate agent,
she was amazing.
258
00:12:03,467 --> 00:12:05,367
She'd agreed to meet us, so.
259
00:12:05,367 --> 00:12:08,634
-Hi, I'm Maddie.
-Hi!
260
00:12:08,700 --> 00:12:09,967
Hi, Maddie. I'm Toni.
261
00:12:09,967 --> 00:12:11,867
-Nice to meet you, Toni.
-You, too!
262
00:12:11,867 --> 00:12:14,667
This location is really great
because it's about five hours
263
00:12:14,667 --> 00:12:16,867
from Christine
and her children
in the Salt Lake area.
264
00:12:16,867 --> 00:12:19,767
So that's really good,
because that's really
the core group of the family.
265
00:12:19,767 --> 00:12:22,567
There's no contact, really,
with Meri or Robyn or Kody.
266
00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:26,033
I don't really foresee
that's gonna change much.
267
00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:27,467
Now the creek
268
00:12:27,467 --> 00:12:28,734
-feeds the ranch.
-Oh, wow, it's running.
269
00:12:28,734 --> 00:12:32,667
-Oh, yes,
this is a year round creek.
-[Janelle] Year round.
270
00:12:32,667 --> 00:12:35,333
This part of Montana
is just beautiful.
271
00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:37,634
There's a big river
that runs through here.
272
00:12:37,700 --> 00:12:39,667
And there's a lake
that's not far away
273
00:12:39,667 --> 00:12:42,367
and I just think
it's wonderful,
274
00:12:42,367 --> 00:12:44,734
So, the lot starts here.
275
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:49,100
-At the road, goes all the way
back to that fence line there.
-[Janelle] Okay.
276
00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:52,033
We'll see
the far end down there.
277
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:57,100
Yeah, you know,
it's really hard to visualize
what 40 acres looks like.
278
00:12:57,100 --> 00:13:00,567
You know you're used to seeing
half an acre or an acre,
279
00:13:00,567 --> 00:13:02,467
maybe in
a residential area.
280
00:13:02,467 --> 00:13:06,867
But when you take 40
and there's nothing on it,
it's a pretty big space.
281
00:13:06,867 --> 00:13:09,467
[Toni] Are you
gonna make mud pies?
282
00:13:09,467 --> 00:13:11,934
I love this property,
and I know Maddie does, too.
283
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:15,000
It's like everything
that we had wanted
in a piece.
284
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,266
We're not farmers,
we're not ranchers,
285
00:13:17,266 --> 00:13:19,467
but we want
to live that rural lifestyle.
286
00:13:19,467 --> 00:13:22,900
A couple animals,
maybe a green house.
287
00:13:24,166 --> 00:13:25,467
Pretty basic.
288
00:13:25,467 --> 00:13:27,133
Maddie, look how big
this property is.
289
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:28,734
It goes clear back.
290
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,700
[Maddie] I know.
291
00:13:29,700 --> 00:13:31,433
[Janelle] So the price
is really good.
292
00:13:31,433 --> 00:13:38,567
The biggest thing is,
it is 40 minutes from "town,"
which is about 1,000 people.
293
00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:42,000
But it would mean
that we would have
to take the kids to school.
294
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,166
Like, it sounds all great.
295
00:13:43,166 --> 00:13:44,000
Forty minutes, no big deal.
296
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,567
But when you're running
back and forth
297
00:13:45,567 --> 00:13:48,667
every single day,
it's just a little bit outside
298
00:13:48,667 --> 00:13:52,467
of the range of
what's probably doable.
299
00:13:52,467 --> 00:13:55,200
[Maddie] Oh, they got out and
ran and ran and ran.
300
00:13:55,266 --> 00:13:57,867
[Robyn] If Janelle
were to move,
it would devastate me.
301
00:13:57,867 --> 00:14:00,066
I don't know how
to let this all go,
302
00:14:00,066 --> 00:14:02,567
and I am not
letting go of Janelle.
303
00:14:02,567 --> 00:14:06,166
They could still
work it out and
we could still be a family.
304
00:14:06,166 --> 00:14:09,767
That's how I see this.
305
00:14:09,767 --> 00:14:12,367
And I feel like
I'm kind of the idiot
that just won't get it.
306
00:14:12,367 --> 00:14:13,800
But I don't know
how to let it go.
307
00:14:14,467 --> 00:14:16,667
-Okay.
-[Axel] Are we going
in there?
308
00:14:16,667 --> 00:14:18,834
-Come here, get in.
-[Janelle] Come on, Axel.
309
00:14:18,900 --> 00:14:21,567
[Kody] When Maddie and Caleb
were living with us
in Las Vegas,
310
00:14:21,567 --> 00:14:25,266
that was the best time
of my life.
311
00:14:25,266 --> 00:14:28,333
-[somber music playing]
-We had the four
homes together.
312
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:30,166
Everything was going
along smoothly,
313
00:14:30,166 --> 00:14:31,667
Maddie and Caleb were around,
314
00:14:31,667 --> 00:14:33,767
and it was great
having them around.
315
00:14:33,767 --> 00:14:35,033
And I loved Caleb.
316
00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,767
He was definitely
like family.
317
00:14:37,767 --> 00:14:40,066
You know,
things started to fall apart
with the divorce,
318
00:14:40,066 --> 00:14:44,734
and then with my differences
with Janelle and
the differences over COVID,
319
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:48,333
it just made all those
relationships go sour.
320
00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,734
[Christine] Kody's allegations
are absolutely ridiculous.
321
00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:55,166
All the kids that were
frustrated, were frustrated
way before I left.
322
00:14:55,166 --> 00:14:59,367
My leaving didn't change
his kids' relationship
with him.
323
00:14:59,367 --> 00:15:03,233
Kody can still fix
his relationships
with his children.
324
00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:09,767
[Kody] I'm so angry about
how I've been treated that
I haven't gotten past that.
325
00:15:09,767 --> 00:15:11,634
Here's the thing is,
I'm not willing
326
00:15:11,700 --> 00:15:15,266
to take blame for things
that my wife or ex wife
327
00:15:15,266 --> 00:15:18,367
is sitting there telling them
that I did.
328
00:15:18,367 --> 00:15:22,867
I hope the time comes
when the contempt
will subside
329
00:15:22,867 --> 00:15:26,300
and we'll be able to find
forgiveness and love again.
330
00:15:27,367 --> 00:15:29,133
[upbeat music playing]
331
00:15:40,166 --> 00:15:42,367
This is a welcome home
party for Ysabel.
332
00:15:42,367 --> 00:15:43,634
Ysabel moved to Utah.
333
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:46,367
So Mykelti,
Avalon are here.
334
00:15:46,367 --> 00:15:50,634
But Maddie's here, of course,
with Axel and Evie,
Hunter's here, too.
335
00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:52,634
And then it's me,
Truely and Ysabel.
336
00:15:52,700 --> 00:15:54,667
It's just, ugh... chaos.
337
00:15:54,667 --> 00:15:55,533
It's awesome.
338
00:15:55,533 --> 00:15:57,567
I'm glad you all came over
to hang out.
339
00:15:57,567 --> 00:15:58,800
-You, too.
-Thanks.
340
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,834
-[Christine] Thank you
for having us.
-And now I can relax.
341
00:16:00,900 --> 00:16:03,467
Maddie and Janelle
just got back from Montana.
342
00:16:03,467 --> 00:16:05,367
They looked at
some property there.
343
00:16:05,367 --> 00:16:07,367
[indistinct chatter]
344
00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:10,000
Janelle's back
in Flagstaff already.
345
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,767
I need to find out
what's going on,
346
00:16:11,767 --> 00:16:13,634
like she really
opened up the conversation,
347
00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:16,467
when we were
traveling back from
my brother's house in Idaho,
348
00:16:16,467 --> 00:16:20,634
about really being
separated from Kody,
but more separated
349
00:16:20,700 --> 00:16:23,333
because she's talking
about buying land
350
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,133
and moving in with Maddie.
351
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:27,567
Where do I need
to throw my support?
352
00:16:27,567 --> 00:16:28,533
Because for me, I'm like,
353
00:16:28,533 --> 00:16:31,667
totally supportive of,
get out of Flagstaff,
354
00:16:31,667 --> 00:16:33,033
move in with Maddie,
355
00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:35,100
get going living with her,
things like that.
356
00:16:35,100 --> 00:16:38,166
That's like, yes,
but I don't know
if she's there.
357
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:39,567
I have no idea.
358
00:16:39,567 --> 00:16:41,033
-You got it on your foot.
-She didn't have to--
359
00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:42,433
No. No, no, no.
360
00:16:43,367 --> 00:16:45,433
It's a water stain.
361
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:47,467
-[Ysabel] Oh, you're fine.
You have a child.
-[laughs]
362
00:16:47,467 --> 00:16:49,867
-[Hunter] What does that
have to do with anything?
-Oh, my God.
363
00:16:49,867 --> 00:16:53,266
You have a child,
so it's an excuse
to look like a slob.
364
00:16:53,266 --> 00:16:54,667
[Ysabel] Exactly.
365
00:16:54,667 --> 00:16:56,734
Oh, Mykelti hates
being pregnant.
366
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:57,967
She hates it.
367
00:16:57,967 --> 00:17:00,266
But Maddie's pregnant now,
too, so they can commiserate.
368
00:17:00,266 --> 00:17:02,367
Janelle and I were pregnant
together, too,
369
00:17:02,367 --> 00:17:05,333
but I loved being pregnant,
whereas Janelle really didn't.
370
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:06,867
It's kind of funny, right?
371
00:17:06,867 --> 00:17:08,934
That our daughters
are pregnant together, too.
372
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,000
[whispers] It's funny.
373
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,634
Mykelti really can have
the babies anytime.
374
00:17:12,700 --> 00:17:15,166
So this is towards
the very end
of her pregnancy.
375
00:17:15,166 --> 00:17:17,433
-[Kody] Here, Avalon.
-[Mykelti] Oh, my God.
376
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:18,600
[Christine]
Mykelti loves Robyn.
377
00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:21,367
And, of course, Robyn's
going to be at the birth.
378
00:17:21,367 --> 00:17:22,300
And it is awkward.
379
00:17:22,300 --> 00:17:25,066
It is awkward,
but it just doesn't matter.
380
00:17:25,066 --> 00:17:27,033
Robyn and I are going
to behave like adults.
381
00:17:28,867 --> 00:17:33,033
Yeah, that could
be awkward, but I'm just
not gonna let it be.
382
00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:35,266
This isn't about me
or my feelings,
383
00:17:35,266 --> 00:17:38,634
It's about Tony and Mykelti,
especially Mykelti,
384
00:17:38,700 --> 00:17:41,000
feeling safe,
secure and supported.
385
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:46,767
And that I'm there to help
with babies and Mykelti
and Tony in any way possible.
386
00:17:46,767 --> 00:17:49,533
Your carrot cake
is here somewhere.
387
00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:51,033
-Somebody ate one of them.
-Really, it is?
388
00:17:51,100 --> 00:17:52,000
And it's gluten free.
389
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,100
Isn't that cute?
390
00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:54,433
Hey, husband.
391
00:17:54,433 --> 00:17:57,333
[Christine]
I don't have a relationship
with Kody and Robyn.
392
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,467
I know that Kody
and Robyn are still...
393
00:17:59,467 --> 00:18:01,266
well, Kody is angry.
394
00:18:01,266 --> 00:18:05,166
Robyn's heartbroken, um...
395
00:18:05,166 --> 00:18:06,867
I have moved on.
396
00:18:06,867 --> 00:18:09,166
And I love being single.
397
00:18:09,166 --> 00:18:10,767
I love my life now.
398
00:18:10,767 --> 00:18:12,333
I've been on a few dates.
399
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,467
Met some really nice guys.
400
00:18:14,467 --> 00:18:17,066
But nothing
emotionally attaching.
401
00:18:17,066 --> 00:18:19,300
It's just fun.
I really like it.
402
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:21,734
[upbeat music playing]
403
00:18:28,567 --> 00:18:30,767
[Aspyn] All right, everyone.
You've got your butter.
404
00:18:30,767 --> 00:18:33,467
You have your lobster.
405
00:18:33,467 --> 00:18:37,266
Thank you all for being here,
for eating at our home.
406
00:18:37,266 --> 00:18:39,467
Our small home,
that accommodates children.
407
00:18:39,467 --> 00:18:40,667
Yes, it does.
408
00:18:40,667 --> 00:18:43,233
[Christine] I love a table
409
00:18:43,300 --> 00:18:47,867
with a lot of people
and not room for everything.
410
00:18:47,867 --> 00:18:49,300
I just feel blessed.
411
00:18:49,300 --> 00:18:54,266
I feel so blessed
that I was able to leave
and still have a rich life.
412
00:18:54,266 --> 00:18:56,734
-[Ysabel] Paedon!
-[all] Paedon!
413
00:18:57,700 --> 00:18:59,233
-[Hunter] What's up?
-Hi, everyone.
414
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:00,600
It's great to see you.
415
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:02,233
-[Ysabel] You're almost
as tall as the ceiling.
-Oh, yeah.
416
00:19:02,300 --> 00:19:03,667
Paedon lives in Ogden.
417
00:19:03,667 --> 00:19:05,667
It's about an hour
away from us.
418
00:19:05,667 --> 00:19:08,300
He often makes it
late to gatherings.
419
00:19:10,266 --> 00:19:11,200
[Paedon] Mmm-hmm.
420
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:12,900
-Yeah? What are you doing?
-[Paedon] Um...
421
00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:26,567
Oh, uh...
422
00:19:26,567 --> 00:19:28,000
Wait, wait. You got a job?
423
00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:35,934
Oh, my gosh, what?
424
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,367
-Dude, Paedon is a bouncer.
That is awesome.
-That is so cool.
425
00:19:38,367 --> 00:19:40,700
Yeah, no,
Paedon has a job at a bar,
426
00:19:41,467 --> 00:19:42,767
I'm just going
to leave it at that.
427
00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:44,166
-Yeah.
-[Aspyn] Seriously?
428
00:19:44,166 --> 00:19:45,367
Yes, seriously.
429
00:19:45,367 --> 00:19:47,433
-[Aspyn] Oh, my God.
-Yep, honestly.
430
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:48,700
Yeah, I'm a bouncer.
431
00:19:48,700 --> 00:19:51,066
[Aspyn] Wait, which one?
If we go there,
will we see you?
432
00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:52,634
[Maddie laughs]
433
00:19:55,567 --> 00:19:57,300
[all laughing]
434
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:03,166
This is not the Utah
I was raised in.
435
00:20:03,166 --> 00:20:08,133
This is not the Utah
I ever dreamed my children
would live in, either.
436
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,100
You know, I thought
we'd get that more in Vegas.
437
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:12,333
No, this is just proof
that my kids are growing up
438
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,166
and they're gonna
do their own thing.
439
00:20:14,166 --> 00:20:16,367
Hey, you guys want
to clean up dinner
and we can play some games?
440
00:20:16,367 --> 00:20:17,767
Love to.
441
00:20:17,767 --> 00:20:19,367
-[Mykelti] It's been great,
thank you for dinner.
-Thank you, Aspyn.
442
00:20:19,367 --> 00:20:21,533
This was
an incredible dinner.
443
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,100
And it's cool to see
everybody all together.
444
00:20:24,100 --> 00:20:26,667
But now Ysabel's
part of our Utah group.
445
00:20:26,667 --> 00:20:31,333
So maybe Maddie and Caleb
and Janelle and Hunter
and Logan.
446
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:33,133
Maybe they'll come more.
That'd be great.
447
00:20:36,667 --> 00:20:38,567
He's not talking
to me about it,
448
00:20:38,567 --> 00:20:41,100
so I think I'm gonna
have to lawyer up.
449
00:20:41,100 --> 00:20:43,967
It's really complicated
because there's no
legal marriage.
450
00:20:43,967 --> 00:20:45,066
I think it's wise.
451
00:20:45,066 --> 00:20:46,734
I think it's really wise.
452
00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:49,734
-Like I think...
-Is your marriage
with Kody over?
453
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:52,300
I feel like I'm on trial,
like I'm being cross-examined.
454
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:56,700
[upbeat music playing]
455
00:21:03,967 --> 00:21:06,734
Oh, my gosh,
Ysabel's back home.
456
00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:10,767
She lives about 20 minutes
away from me now in Utah,
457
00:21:10,767 --> 00:21:13,166
and she's doing great.
458
00:21:13,166 --> 00:21:15,834
Then I'm gonna go hang out
with Janelle for a little bit
459
00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:18,867
to see how she liked
the property in Montana.
460
00:21:18,867 --> 00:21:22,767
This is a big deal for her
to be thinking about moving
in with Maddie,
461
00:21:22,767 --> 00:21:25,000
and if she's going to be
building with Maddie,
462
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,433
is she still going to be
building in Flagstaff?
463
00:21:26,433 --> 00:21:29,266
I just have questions.
I'm just gonna meet up
with Janelle in Flagstaff.
464
00:21:29,266 --> 00:21:30,433
[knock on door]
465
00:21:31,667 --> 00:21:33,333
-Hey.
-I like your wreath.
466
00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:35,000
-I know. It's just that--
-I love it.
467
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,367
I'm just concerned
about her situation with Kody.
468
00:21:37,367 --> 00:21:40,066
Are they over?
Are they done? Um...
469
00:21:40,066 --> 00:21:41,500
What does she need?
470
00:21:42,500 --> 00:21:44,467
Are you still thinking
of building out
on Coyote Pass?
471
00:21:44,467 --> 00:21:45,333
I love it here.
472
00:21:45,333 --> 00:21:48,266
-You love it here. Okay.
-I love it here.
473
00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:52,900
But I'm not sure
it's functional for me to stay
for the rest of my life here.
474
00:21:53,700 --> 00:21:56,133
[Christine] The property needs
to be paid off.
475
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:59,000
So how serious is anybody
really about living
on that property?
476
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:00,867
Is anyone really
going to live there?
477
00:22:00,867 --> 00:22:04,100
I've actually thought about
asking him if he wants
to buy me out.
478
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,266
And not have
anything on the...
479
00:22:07,266 --> 00:22:08,667
That's been kind of
a hard realization,
480
00:22:08,667 --> 00:22:10,433
because it's like,
my dream, right?
481
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,333
Like forever, even when
we lived back in Wyoming,
482
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,333
I wanted the whole
homestead thing.
483
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,467
And you really
wouldn't build...
Oh, my God.
484
00:22:16,467 --> 00:22:17,634
[laughs]
485
00:22:17,634 --> 00:22:20,567
I've always wanted
my own piece of land
that I could...
486
00:22:20,567 --> 00:22:23,000
have a garden,
maybe a few animals,
487
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,467
and just kind of
live simply.
488
00:22:24,467 --> 00:22:26,467
And Kody hates
everything about
489
00:22:26,467 --> 00:22:28,100
living on a farm
and living on a ranch.
490
00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:30,967
And he always wanted
to be the city guy with
the fancy car
491
00:22:30,967 --> 00:22:31,867
and the great job
492
00:22:31,867 --> 00:22:34,166
and like that was always
what he wanted.
493
00:22:34,166 --> 00:22:37,467
Kody grew up on a farm,
and I think he was like,
"Nope, had my fill of that.
494
00:22:37,467 --> 00:22:38,533
Not interested."
495
00:22:38,533 --> 00:22:42,834
So what changed my mind
was when I went with Maddie,
496
00:22:42,900 --> 00:22:45,467
to look in Montana,
and I'm like,
497
00:22:45,467 --> 00:22:48,533
"Oh, I could have
this somewhere else."
498
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:49,967
It's no-brainer.
499
00:22:49,967 --> 00:22:55,967
Living with Maddie and Caleb
on a property in Montana
versus living
500
00:22:55,967 --> 00:22:59,166
on Coyote Pass
with a house and who knows?
501
00:22:59,166 --> 00:23:02,567
Maybe Kody and Robyn
right there living on
the same property.
502
00:23:02,567 --> 00:23:05,367
Maybe Meri is going to have
a house there, too.
503
00:23:05,367 --> 00:23:09,100
Yeah, that's just no.
Just no.
504
00:23:09,100 --> 00:23:10,233
However...
505
00:23:10,867 --> 00:23:12,767
if Kody's not willing
to buy me out,
506
00:23:12,767 --> 00:23:14,900
then I think
I'm gonna have to do...
507
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:16,934
I'm gonna have
to do something with it,
508
00:23:16,934 --> 00:23:20,033
But we've got to pay it off,
and he's not talking
to me about it.
509
00:23:20,100 --> 00:23:22,767
So I think I'm going
to have to lawyer up,
I think.
510
00:23:22,767 --> 00:23:25,133
Because I think
that's the only way
I'm ever gonna
511
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,333
-get any kind
of decision out of him.
-Mmm-hmm.
512
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,400
And you need to have a...
513
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,033
Definitely get
a lawyer involved.
I think so.
514
00:23:31,100 --> 00:23:32,667
I don't know
what else to do.
515
00:23:32,667 --> 00:23:34,767
-I don't know
what else to do.
-Mmm-mmm.
516
00:23:34,767 --> 00:23:37,033
Part of it is I really have
no legal rights
517
00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:39,533
to make any kind of claim
on Kody's property.
518
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,200
Like we're not
legally married.
519
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:44,233
It's not like I'm just calling
a lawyer and saying I need
to divorce this person.
520
00:23:44,300 --> 00:23:47,667
No, it's really complicated
because there's no
legal marriage.
521
00:23:47,667 --> 00:23:49,000
Yeah, it sucks
that she just can't
522
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,133
work it out with Kody,
that she's got a lawyer up.
523
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:52,433
That's ridiculous.
524
00:23:52,500 --> 00:23:54,634
I think it's wise, however.
525
00:23:54,700 --> 00:23:56,066
I think it's really wise.
526
00:23:56,066 --> 00:23:57,367
Like I think it, well--
527
00:23:57,367 --> 00:23:59,300
Is your marriage
with Kody over?
528
00:24:00,467 --> 00:24:01,367
Yes, yes.
529
00:24:01,367 --> 00:24:03,233
Does he know?
530
00:24:03,300 --> 00:24:06,567
Well, he's not talked
to me for a very long time,
and now we've resorted,
531
00:24:06,567 --> 00:24:08,467
even business
is done via text.
532
00:24:08,467 --> 00:24:10,567
-Really?
-Like, we aren't even
talking on the phone.
533
00:24:10,567 --> 00:24:12,367
Did you tell him
the words "it's over"?
534
00:24:12,367 --> 00:24:15,266
No, like I don't see him,
he avoids me.
535
00:24:15,266 --> 00:24:17,667
So in our church,
there's no legal marriages
536
00:24:17,667 --> 00:24:20,100
except for,
like Kody and Robyn
are legally married,
537
00:24:20,100 --> 00:24:24,133
the rest of us aren't.
So when you end a marriage...
538
00:24:25,500 --> 00:24:28,467
I mean, for me, um...
539
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:31,233
There was
a definite ending point where
I could look back and go,
540
00:24:31,300 --> 00:24:33,567
"Yes, it's over,"
that kind of a thing,
541
00:24:33,567 --> 00:24:34,934
so I could move on.
542
00:24:34,934 --> 00:24:38,667
Why don't you have
a conversation with him
and tell him it's over?
543
00:24:38,667 --> 00:24:41,567
I've been trying to talk
to him about the land,
and he keeps putting me off.
544
00:24:41,567 --> 00:24:45,100
Keeps, like, can't talk
for this reason,
and then that reason passes,
545
00:24:45,100 --> 00:24:46,333
and then he can't talk
for another reason.
546
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,133
-And so it's like...
-For a lot of reasons
547
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:49,700
you need to make
that call.
548
00:24:50,900 --> 00:24:52,567
[Janelle] So this is
what frustrates me.
549
00:24:52,567 --> 00:24:56,567
Christine comes into town
and she starts grilling me
and expects that
550
00:24:56,567 --> 00:24:59,066
my breakup to look
just like hers and
to cross off
551
00:24:59,066 --> 00:25:01,734
all these boxes
that hers did.
552
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,166
And it's a very
different relationship,
553
00:25:03,166 --> 00:25:05,166
and it's come apart
very differently.
554
00:25:05,166 --> 00:25:08,433
I've told Kody, he knows,
we've had a conversation.
555
00:25:08,500 --> 00:25:11,433
I don't want him to be
part of my new life.
556
00:25:11,500 --> 00:25:15,567
I don't have any official
divorce 'cause we weren't
really ever legally married.
557
00:25:15,567 --> 00:25:19,667
As soon as the Coyote Pass
property is settled and
I can get my part out,
558
00:25:19,667 --> 00:25:22,967
I probably won't interact
with him ever again.
559
00:25:22,967 --> 00:25:25,634
I was always asking Janelle
about our relationship,
560
00:25:25,700 --> 00:25:27,767
and she was always
indicating that she didn't
want to reconcile.
561
00:25:27,767 --> 00:25:31,934
It was kind of this,
sort of just, like,
we're not in the same place.
562
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:33,266
We're not necessarily
in agreement.
563
00:25:33,266 --> 00:25:35,867
We're not really working
on the relationship.
564
00:25:35,867 --> 00:25:38,333
But there was never
anything cut and dried.
565
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:42,367
It was more, like, just,
we're gradually
just fading away.
566
00:25:42,367 --> 00:25:44,834
I just think this is so funny.
567
00:25:44,900 --> 00:25:46,867
This is comical.
568
00:25:46,867 --> 00:25:50,634
Kody's sitting here
complaining about Janelle,
569
00:25:50,700 --> 00:25:55,266
saying that there was
no communication.
Nothing was clear.
570
00:25:55,266 --> 00:26:01,066
Dude. You did the same
exact thing to me.
571
00:26:01,066 --> 00:26:02,500
Exactly.
572
00:26:03,166 --> 00:26:04,767
[whispers] Karma's a bitch.
573
00:26:04,767 --> 00:26:06,467
[laughs]
574
00:26:06,467 --> 00:26:08,433
I mean, like,
look, it's over.
575
00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:11,367
I mean, Kody and I
are never gonna be
a married couple again.
576
00:26:11,367 --> 00:26:13,567
Um... But...
577
00:26:13,567 --> 00:26:16,367
There isn't anybody
because I still have my faith.
578
00:26:16,367 --> 00:26:18,166
I still believe
in the faith.
579
00:26:20,467 --> 00:26:23,767
Christine has just
decided that she doesn't
believe in the faith anymore.
580
00:26:23,767 --> 00:26:26,567
And so their wedding vows
have no validity,
which is fine.
581
00:26:26,567 --> 00:26:27,734
She can decide that.
582
00:26:29,367 --> 00:26:31,834
I still I believe
in my faith.
583
00:26:31,900 --> 00:26:35,100
And if I do,
then my marriage
vows have validity.
584
00:26:35,100 --> 00:26:37,934
Even if I'm no longer
with Kody, physically,
585
00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:40,033
like in
the same house or whatever.
586
00:26:40,667 --> 00:26:42,667
You know,
I don't want to...
587
00:26:42,667 --> 00:26:45,533
but we're all in
this different place
in our faith.
588
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:49,433
I, uh, don't want
to disparage
my former faith.
589
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:52,467
I'm not interested in it.
590
00:26:52,467 --> 00:26:54,667
I'm not interested
in their BS,
591
00:26:54,667 --> 00:26:57,166
but I don't want
to disparage it.
592
00:26:57,166 --> 00:26:59,367
Would you,
if things were different...
593
00:26:59,367 --> 00:27:01,634
If... I mean, whatever,
594
00:27:01,700 --> 00:27:05,100
would you go back to Kody,
or are you interested in...
595
00:27:05,100 --> 00:27:06,867
-Is it over over?
-No, that's been
in progression
596
00:27:06,867 --> 00:27:08,767
last summer,
when we talked about it, yes.
597
00:27:08,767 --> 00:27:09,767
Okay.
598
00:27:09,767 --> 00:27:13,667
-Yeah.
-But I don't see
any path back, really.
599
00:27:13,667 --> 00:27:16,333
I don't want to go back
because I don't want
600
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:19,367
to even do all the work
that would be involved,
601
00:27:19,367 --> 00:27:21,734
if Kody was even open
and he's not really.
602
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:24,567
He sort of feels like
I should conform to him.
603
00:27:24,567 --> 00:27:27,233
I'm gonna be the head
of my household again.
604
00:27:27,300 --> 00:27:29,066
And so,
605
00:27:29,066 --> 00:27:31,767
if everybody
is willing to conform
606
00:27:31,767 --> 00:27:35,300
to patriarchy again,
I guess, because...
607
00:27:36,867 --> 00:27:39,300
I've been fighting
to make everybody happy.
608
00:27:40,100 --> 00:27:42,333
Those things
that he's asking me for now,
609
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:46,266
obedience and whatever,
for him to be the patriarch.
610
00:27:46,266 --> 00:27:48,767
Those were not
ever part of our original
marriage contract.
611
00:27:48,767 --> 00:27:50,467
It was not something
we discussed.
612
00:27:50,467 --> 00:27:52,000
It was not something
he asked of me.
613
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:53,467
I probably never
would have agreed.
614
00:27:53,467 --> 00:27:55,567
I probably never
would have married him.
615
00:27:55,567 --> 00:27:57,967
This whole
patriarchy thing,
616
00:27:57,967 --> 00:27:59,467
I've never done that.
617
00:27:59,467 --> 00:28:01,100
I've never intended to.
618
00:28:01,100 --> 00:28:05,066
And when I spoke of it,
it was out of grief and pain
619
00:28:05,066 --> 00:28:06,033
and failure.
620
00:28:06,033 --> 00:28:08,367
Because I didn't know
what I had done wrong.
621
00:28:08,367 --> 00:28:10,133
Maddie, look how big
this property is.
622
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:11,400
It goes clear back.
623
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:13,767
So that coupled
with the fact
that I'm excited about
624
00:28:13,767 --> 00:28:17,400
where I'm headed with my life,
it just will never work.
625
00:28:23,900 --> 00:28:27,166
About eight weeks ago,
Meri told me that she
was gonna go
626
00:28:27,166 --> 00:28:31,934
to meet with
our church leaders and
basically request a divorce.
627
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:34,233
It's called a "release"
in our church.
628
00:28:34,300 --> 00:28:39,133
The damage was done
so badly that we're not going
to reconcile, no matter what.
629
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:42,200
I needed her just to go away.
630
00:28:42,867 --> 00:28:44,367
It's been done
631
00:28:44,367 --> 00:28:46,300
and over for years.
632
00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:50,300
[upbeat music playing]
633
00:28:57,367 --> 00:28:59,033
[Kody] Um...
634
00:28:59,100 --> 00:29:04,066
About eight weeks ago,
Meri told me that she was
gonna go to Utah,
635
00:29:04,066 --> 00:29:08,667
meet with
our church leaders and
basically request a divorce.
636
00:29:08,667 --> 00:29:11,000
It's called a "release"
in our church.
637
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:16,266
When each of us
four ladies married Kody,
it was through our church.
638
00:29:16,266 --> 00:29:18,634
Obviously, we can't all
be legally married,
639
00:29:18,700 --> 00:29:21,967
but it was what
we called a covenant.
640
00:29:21,967 --> 00:29:24,634
So I feel like it's best
to terminate that
641
00:29:24,700 --> 00:29:28,667
because we're not moving
forward with any marriage
642
00:29:28,667 --> 00:29:31,767
and I don't want to be like
sealed to him for eternity
643
00:29:31,767 --> 00:29:35,834
if he doesn't want me
and, you know,
I'm at a place
644
00:29:35,900 --> 00:29:38,467
that like, let's just separate
this completely.
645
00:29:38,467 --> 00:29:43,567
When I was asking Kody
how he felt about moving
forward with the release,
646
00:29:43,567 --> 00:29:46,133
He was kind of
resistant to it.
647
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:49,667
You know, he said that
he didn't want to...
648
00:29:49,667 --> 00:29:54,934
acknowledge the authority
of the church leaders.
649
00:29:55,000 --> 00:30:00,033
The damage was done so badly
that we are not going
to reconcile, no matter what.
650
00:30:00,100 --> 00:30:03,033
And so, however we are
made accountable to God,
651
00:30:03,100 --> 00:30:06,166
I don't want to be
accountable to this church
and all their BS.
652
00:30:06,166 --> 00:30:09,433
So I'm going to let Meri
go and do her thing.
653
00:30:09,500 --> 00:30:11,467
Because if I
am angry at her,
654
00:30:11,467 --> 00:30:13,133
it becomes a fight.
655
00:30:13,767 --> 00:30:17,433
I needed her
just to go away.
656
00:30:17,500 --> 00:30:21,233
Because it just took forever
for her to finally realize.
657
00:30:23,266 --> 00:30:24,834
It's been done
658
00:30:24,900 --> 00:30:27,667
and over for years.
659
00:30:27,667 --> 00:30:31,533
[Meri] I've been living
in limbo in this relationship
for nearly a decade,
660
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,467
and I'm just not going
to keep doing that.
661
00:30:33,467 --> 00:30:35,400
So I'm moving forward
with this.
662
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:39,000
When Meri and I
got married,
663
00:30:41,467 --> 00:30:46,433
there was a lot of wisdom
that we lacked
in our marriage.
664
00:30:46,500 --> 00:30:48,967
I didn't know who she was.
When we got married,
665
00:30:48,967 --> 00:30:50,600
she was very different.
666
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:54,467
And I think just there was
some baggage that Meri had
that I didn't know about.
667
00:30:54,467 --> 00:30:56,834
Initially, I felt like
I could live with it.
668
00:30:59,100 --> 00:31:00,533
I mean, "Here, baby,
669
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:01,567
want a piece of gum?"
670
00:31:01,567 --> 00:31:03,767
[angrily] "You know
I don't like spearmint."
671
00:31:03,767 --> 00:31:09,200
I can't live in a world
where she is constantly
angry at me.
672
00:31:09,767 --> 00:31:11,634
And as time went on,
673
00:31:12,500 --> 00:31:16,567
our relationship
just got worse
and worse and worse.
674
00:31:16,567 --> 00:31:21,233
Janelle came in the family,
and it diluted this experience
I had with Meri.
675
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,233
What ended up happening
is that sort of...
676
00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:27,467
anger or...
677
00:31:27,467 --> 00:31:31,233
dysfunction started
to manifest between
Janelle and Meri.
678
00:31:32,266 --> 00:31:33,400
And...
679
00:31:34,300 --> 00:31:36,133
that got pretty bad.
680
00:31:37,066 --> 00:31:39,333
Christine came in
the family,
sort of diluted
681
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,500
the relationship
between Janelle and Meri.
682
00:31:42,767 --> 00:31:44,734
Which I'll be
really honest with you,
683
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:46,300
probably saved it.
684
00:31:47,367 --> 00:31:49,467
You know the thing
in plural marriage
685
00:31:49,467 --> 00:31:50,900
that is very funny
686
00:31:51,767 --> 00:31:55,467
about divorcing,
is a man has no choice
687
00:31:55,467 --> 00:31:57,567
after he's already married
in plural marriage.
688
00:31:57,567 --> 00:32:00,667
If he wants to stay faithful
and in the faith,
689
00:32:00,667 --> 00:32:03,667
he cannot request
a divorce.
690
00:32:03,667 --> 00:32:04,834
It's not allowed.
691
00:32:04,834 --> 00:32:09,467
So I was not able
to get out
of that relationship.
692
00:32:09,467 --> 00:32:12,266
At the same time,
I didn't necessarily
want out of the relationship.
693
00:32:12,266 --> 00:32:14,734
I wanted to know
if we could save it
and fix it.
694
00:32:16,667 --> 00:32:18,467
There was
a complete nuance about,
695
00:32:18,467 --> 00:32:21,133
well, we're going to
figure out our relationship.
696
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,266
Like there were
several times I was with her,
where I'm like,
697
00:32:23,266 --> 00:32:24,467
"Well, here's
to a new beginning.
698
00:32:24,467 --> 00:32:25,834
We're gonna
figure this out."
699
00:32:26,700 --> 00:32:29,934
Every time I was with her,
she wasn't nice.
700
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:31,667
She wasn't fun.
701
00:32:31,667 --> 00:32:33,467
She wasn't kind.
702
00:32:33,467 --> 00:32:34,667
She wasn't interesting.
703
00:32:34,667 --> 00:32:37,000
I'm trying
to be curious with her.
704
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:38,066
And I'm bored.
705
00:32:40,166 --> 00:32:44,367
And so I guess, to be fair,
Meri feels abandoned.
706
00:32:44,367 --> 00:32:47,100
But I didn't kick me out.
707
00:32:48,667 --> 00:32:53,600
Christine, Janelle
and Meri all chose
to have me leave the home.
708
00:32:55,166 --> 00:32:57,233
And I'm not playing
the victim card.
709
00:32:58,567 --> 00:33:01,100
I'm just saying
it's just the way that it was.
710
00:33:02,567 --> 00:33:04,734
And that I wasn't ever
going to leave them.
711
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:07,934
No matter how much
I didn't love them.
712
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,734
But they made choices
that separated us.
713
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:17,834
And maybe I made choices
that separated us,
but they eventually moved on.
714
00:33:17,900 --> 00:33:20,767
Robyn has always
been a loyal wife.
715
00:33:20,767 --> 00:33:24,133
She's always been loyal
to her sister wives,
716
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,233
and she has always
been loyal to me.
717
00:33:26,300 --> 00:33:30,934
The one thing that Robyn
brought to this family
was loyalty.
718
00:33:32,367 --> 00:33:35,100
And so my loyalty
is to Robyn.
719
00:33:35,767 --> 00:33:37,133
In the end,
720
00:33:38,367 --> 00:33:42,333
it's not about blame,
it's about choice.
721
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:47,367
We chose the road
we've been on.
This is the life we chose.
722
00:33:47,367 --> 00:33:49,967
And when we chose well,
we were a happy family.
723
00:33:49,967 --> 00:33:51,900
And when we chose badly,
we weren't.
724
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:56,233
But everybody's
on their journey.
725
00:33:56,300 --> 00:33:58,800
And I hope in the end
that everybody is happy.
726
00:34:03,367 --> 00:34:05,033
There's a lot
of hurt feelings.
727
00:34:05,100 --> 00:34:09,066
I have hope that
in a few years this will
all sort of calm down.
728
00:34:09,066 --> 00:34:10,367
I hope so, too.
729
00:34:10,367 --> 00:34:14,533
[Kody] I'm going
to move forward and
find happiness and joy
730
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:16,533
outside of my club.
731
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:19,233
Because it was my club
and I got kicked out of it.
732
00:34:21,100 --> 00:34:22,900
[upbeat music playing]
733
00:34:28,266 --> 00:34:29,266
[Christine] Are you gonna do
734
00:34:29,266 --> 00:34:30,166
Thanksgiving with Logan?
735
00:34:30,166 --> 00:34:31,634
-Because they sent
out that text.
-Yes.
736
00:34:31,700 --> 00:34:33,166
-Are you?
-Yes.
737
00:34:33,166 --> 00:34:34,767
-At Logan and Michelle's?
-'Cause they're so excited
at their new house.
738
00:34:34,767 --> 00:34:37,367
And Hunter lives there now,
in Vegas.
739
00:34:37,367 --> 00:34:41,767
So for Thanksgiving this year,
we're gonna be
gathering at Logan,
740
00:34:41,767 --> 00:34:43,233
my oldest son's, house.
741
00:34:43,300 --> 00:34:46,166
He and Michelle
are hosting. Um...
742
00:34:46,166 --> 00:34:49,066
All my kids are going
to be there,
except for Maddie and Caleb.
743
00:34:49,066 --> 00:34:51,634
Have you told Kody
that you're not gonna
be here for Thanksgiving?
744
00:34:51,700 --> 00:34:52,767
No, I haven't
talked to Kody.
745
00:34:52,767 --> 00:34:55,900
We're not talking, like,
there's no communication.
746
00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:58,867
I'm not tracking
the holiday in Kody.
747
00:34:58,867 --> 00:35:01,533
I don't think he's really
tracking what I'm doing.
748
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,100
I don't think he's really
even tracking
what the kids are doing.
749
00:35:04,100 --> 00:35:07,867
He has been pretty focused
at what's going
on in Robyn's house.
750
00:35:07,867 --> 00:35:09,433
That's his world now.
751
00:35:09,500 --> 00:35:10,867
Did you feel like...
Do you feel like he's, like,
752
00:35:10,867 --> 00:35:13,066
stringing you along
or something?
753
00:35:13,066 --> 00:35:16,467
No, I don't know what
he thinks is going on,
but I'm ready to move on.
754
00:35:16,467 --> 00:35:19,233
But I can't
conclude business without...
755
00:35:19,967 --> 00:35:21,567
-Some sort of...
-The business
756
00:35:21,567 --> 00:35:23,834
part of it is why...
I mean, you can't really say
757
00:35:23,900 --> 00:35:25,767
we're over if you still...
758
00:35:25,767 --> 00:35:27,233
Well, it's the land.
759
00:35:27,300 --> 00:35:28,567
-Honestly, it's the land.
-Right. Okay.
760
00:35:28,567 --> 00:35:31,333
The land keeps me
tied here.
761
00:35:32,667 --> 00:35:35,433
I think Christine's, like,
looking for me
to say the word divorced.
762
00:35:35,500 --> 00:35:37,934
And I guess I don't really
need to say that word.
763
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,233
To me, I hate that word.
I just... I don't want it.
764
00:35:40,300 --> 00:35:41,834
I don't like it.
765
00:35:41,834 --> 00:35:44,333
So what I tell people is
I'm just no longer with
the father of my children.
766
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:46,767
I don't really care what
they think of me.
In this day and age,
767
00:35:46,767 --> 00:35:48,133
lots of people
don't get married.
768
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,567
I don't have
to say divorced.
769
00:35:50,567 --> 00:35:52,967
I think Janelle doesn't want
to define this because
she doesn't want
770
00:35:52,967 --> 00:35:56,567
to have to actually go,
cap in hand,
back to our church leaders.
771
00:35:56,567 --> 00:35:59,166
I think Janelle,
like she does many things,
772
00:35:59,166 --> 00:36:02,266
is just want to sweep it
under the rug and walk away.
773
00:36:02,266 --> 00:36:07,367
If anything, I just hope,
at least, that Kody has
a connection with his kids,
774
00:36:07,367 --> 00:36:08,734
-you know what I mean?
-I hope so, too.
775
00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:10,567
-He and I may never.
-Which is...
776
00:36:10,567 --> 00:36:11,834
Which is okay.
777
00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:13,300
Yeah, it's fine.
778
00:36:13,300 --> 00:36:17,867
Most ex-spouses
don't really go hang out
with each other or whatever.
779
00:36:17,867 --> 00:36:23,667
I know, but I really honestly
hoped that we would get
to that point.
780
00:36:23,667 --> 00:36:27,867
So, you know,
in a few weeks we have
our first big family event,
781
00:36:27,867 --> 00:36:29,634
where we'll all
see each other.
782
00:36:29,700 --> 00:36:31,333
It'll be the first time
we're all together
783
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:35,100
in one space
since Ysabel's
graduation party.
784
00:36:35,100 --> 00:36:37,734
There's a lot
of hurt feelings with Kody
785
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:38,867
and his kids,
but they're going
to be there.
786
00:36:38,867 --> 00:36:40,967
Kody and Robyn
are going to come.
787
00:36:40,967 --> 00:36:42,867
Uh, their kids
will be there.
788
00:36:42,867 --> 00:36:45,333
I don't know what
any of this looks like.
789
00:36:45,400 --> 00:36:46,367
I'm super nervous.
790
00:36:46,367 --> 00:36:49,767
Awkward, awkward will be
the word of the day.
791
00:36:49,767 --> 00:36:54,033
I have hoped that
in a few years this will all
sort of calm down.
792
00:36:54,100 --> 00:36:58,967
I hope so, too,
because honestly,
it's so sad how it is.
793
00:36:58,967 --> 00:37:01,467
It's so sad, and I think
so much goes back
794
00:37:01,467 --> 00:37:03,834
to the very,
very, very beginning.
795
00:37:03,900 --> 00:37:09,667
I know Robyn's kid's,
based on the text thread
from last year, um...
796
00:37:09,667 --> 00:37:11,433
There were just
so many things said.
797
00:37:12,500 --> 00:37:13,834
About a little over
a year ago,
798
00:37:13,834 --> 00:37:17,433
there was a text message
chain about
the Christmas gift exchange.
799
00:37:17,500 --> 00:37:18,266
It all went bad.
800
00:37:18,266 --> 00:37:19,467
It all went south.
801
00:37:19,467 --> 00:37:22,066
Kody and Robyn and
their kids were on one side.
802
00:37:22,066 --> 00:37:24,367
And they wanted nothing
to do with Janelle,
803
00:37:24,367 --> 00:37:25,634
me, our kids.
804
00:37:25,634 --> 00:37:29,133
And there was a split
that happened
after this text thread.
805
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:34,266
And so my older kids
all said, you know,
this was emotionally unsafe.
806
00:37:34,266 --> 00:37:35,667
We just need
to kind of step back.
807
00:37:35,667 --> 00:37:38,033
We just need
to put down a boundary here.
808
00:37:38,100 --> 00:37:42,567
But it was never anything
about, "We don't want
to see you again.
809
00:37:42,567 --> 00:37:43,834
We don't want anything
to do with you."
810
00:37:43,834 --> 00:37:48,066
It was about...
It was just about, like,
"Hey, this got yucky."
811
00:37:48,066 --> 00:37:51,767
They just didn't feel like
they were ever even welcome
into the family.
812
00:37:51,767 --> 00:37:53,066
And for me,
813
00:37:53,066 --> 00:37:55,433
I thought
I was welcoming.
814
00:37:55,500 --> 00:37:56,667
Yeah.
815
00:37:56,667 --> 00:37:59,834
My mom's kids
and I have each had
816
00:37:59,900 --> 00:38:01,734
our own experiences.
817
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:04,266
Um, being told directly...
818
00:38:04,266 --> 00:38:07,667
I have been told directly
in multiple circumstances
819
00:38:07,667 --> 00:38:09,433
by multiple
different people
820
00:38:09,500 --> 00:38:12,166
that I was not accepted,
that I was not their sister,
821
00:38:12,166 --> 00:38:14,066
that they didn't consider
or see me that way.
822
00:38:14,066 --> 00:38:17,500
The parents could have done
a better job with...
823
00:38:18,467 --> 00:38:21,233
you know,
connecting us as a family.
824
00:38:21,300 --> 00:38:22,734
And it never
really happened.
825
00:38:23,367 --> 00:38:24,767
[somber music playing]
826
00:38:24,767 --> 00:38:26,100
They're yours?
827
00:38:26,100 --> 00:38:29,066
[Christine] Robyn's kids
and Robyn were invited
to everything.
828
00:38:29,066 --> 00:38:31,266
Like everything that we did,
they were always invited.
829
00:38:31,266 --> 00:38:33,166
And I would just say,
"Just come in.
830
00:38:33,166 --> 00:38:35,667
Come into the house
anytime you want."
831
00:38:35,667 --> 00:38:39,166
Like Ysabel is so,
so close to Robyn's kids
and Mykelti,
832
00:38:39,166 --> 00:38:42,133
come on,
she lived with them
for a while.
833
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,667
There were hard times
and my kids were frustrated.
834
00:38:45,667 --> 00:38:48,767
But they always considered
Robyn's kids their siblings
just the same.
835
00:38:48,767 --> 00:38:50,266
Truely didn't even know
836
00:38:50,266 --> 00:38:53,133
that Dayton, Aurora
and Breanna
837
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:56,767
weren't biologically
her siblings as well.
838
00:38:56,767 --> 00:39:00,634
She had no idea
That's how combined we were.
839
00:39:00,700 --> 00:39:02,000
To the Brownies
and their friends.
840
00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:06,734
[all] Cheers.
841
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:12,467
[Kody] There's some people
in my family that feel like
they are superior to others.
842
00:39:12,467 --> 00:39:14,166
And they're like,
843
00:39:14,166 --> 00:39:17,634
"Oh, well, we're not going
to include them in our club."
844
00:39:19,166 --> 00:39:25,066
I am going to move forward
and find happiness and joy
outside of my club
845
00:39:25,066 --> 00:39:27,634
because it was my club
and I got kicked out of it.
846
00:39:28,700 --> 00:39:31,233
You know, I'm really
actually pretty happy.
847
00:39:31,300 --> 00:39:32,634
I don't even know...
848
00:39:32,634 --> 00:39:35,667
I don't even want to have
to adjust my schedule anymore.
[laughs]
849
00:39:35,667 --> 00:39:36,834
No, I know.
850
00:39:36,834 --> 00:39:40,634
So I kind of had
this two lives,
like I had this schedule
851
00:39:40,700 --> 00:39:43,100
I lived and I loved and went
to bed when I wanted
852
00:39:43,100 --> 00:39:45,767
We didn't have to follow
crazy food rules for dinner
853
00:39:45,767 --> 00:39:49,133
because he's allergic
to everything or whatever.
I don't know.
854
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,400
And so when he would
come every third day,
855
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,867
all the sudden,
it was like this
whole alter universe,
856
00:39:52,867 --> 00:39:55,467
and that was...
Like, I was willing
to do it.
857
00:39:55,467 --> 00:39:57,467
But it was hard,
and now I don't have
to do that anymore.
858
00:39:57,467 --> 00:39:59,033
It's very liberating.
859
00:39:59,100 --> 00:40:00,767
Life felt normal
860
00:40:00,767 --> 00:40:04,734
when he was there
and when he wasn't there,
it was just the situation.
861
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,867
It was plural marriage,
and as a plural wife,
862
00:40:07,867 --> 00:40:10,033
you become
a little more independent.
863
00:40:10,100 --> 00:40:12,367
You're handling things
with kids more on your own.
864
00:40:12,367 --> 00:40:17,533
But for the most part,
it was just... it was
what life was, you know?
865
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:18,834
So...
866
00:40:18,900 --> 00:40:21,667
I can't remember. [laughs]
867
00:40:21,667 --> 00:40:25,634
It has been so long
since Kody's been around
at my house.
868
00:40:25,700 --> 00:40:29,333
Like the norm is for him
to not be around.
869
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:30,767
[Christine] Isn't that
the saddest thing?
870
00:40:30,767 --> 00:40:35,967
I'd be like scrambling,
trying to fit him
into my life and like--
871
00:40:35,967 --> 00:40:37,333
See, I didn't
really mind.
872
00:40:37,333 --> 00:40:40,834
And I actually would do
plural marriage again
for the independence.
873
00:40:40,900 --> 00:40:42,233
[jolly music playing]
874
00:40:42,300 --> 00:40:44,634
So when
it's functioning correctly,
875
00:40:44,700 --> 00:40:46,033
you have
this amazing family unit
876
00:40:46,033 --> 00:40:49,100
that you're part of,
a community
that you're plugged into.
877
00:40:49,100 --> 00:40:50,266
You have a husband
and you have a great
878
00:40:50,266 --> 00:40:52,967
relationship with him and
you have everything, right?
879
00:40:52,967 --> 00:40:54,867
And then I have
all my independence.
880
00:40:54,867 --> 00:40:58,834
So to me,
plural marriage really was
a really great arrangement.
881
00:40:58,900 --> 00:41:00,834
But I'm at peace.
882
00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:02,367
I'm okay.
883
00:41:02,367 --> 00:41:03,834
-I mean--
-It's nice, right?
You're good.
884
00:41:03,900 --> 00:41:04,800
You're peaceful.
885
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:06,367
Yeah, it's not exactly
what I envisioned,
886
00:41:06,367 --> 00:41:07,867
but it's okay,
you know what I mean?
887
00:41:07,867 --> 00:41:09,300
It's okay.
888
00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:13,634
It's so strange because I see
this life I had,
and I see it over here,
889
00:41:13,700 --> 00:41:18,333
like, kind of in the, like,
in the past, and I remember
all those things.
890
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:22,467
But now it's just, like,
it's not even relevant
to me now.
891
00:41:22,467 --> 00:41:25,033
It's so weird to be
so separate from that life.
892
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:29,467
Think it's just complicated.
893
00:41:29,467 --> 00:41:31,767
It's a lot more complicated
for Janelle to leave.
894
00:41:31,767 --> 00:41:33,767
She has the ties
to the land.
895
00:41:33,767 --> 00:41:36,567
And then she has the ties
to her commitment to God.
896
00:41:36,567 --> 00:41:42,000
She's got some serious ties
that I didn't understand,
and now I get it.
897
00:41:45,166 --> 00:41:47,266
[Kody reading]
898
00:41:47,266 --> 00:41:48,767
We didn't really talk
to each other.
899
00:41:48,767 --> 00:41:50,367
Kody, Robyn...
900
00:41:50,367 --> 00:41:54,667
I nodded at Meri,
Christine and I sat together
with the kids.
901
00:41:54,667 --> 00:41:56,934
It's... civil war.
902
00:41:58,000 --> 00:42:00,066
You are set up
for an induction.
903
00:42:00,667 --> 00:42:02,200
Gonna turn it to a C-Section.
904
00:42:03,900 --> 00:42:08,166
Losing the chance to be able
to hold my child, first thing,
905
00:42:08,166 --> 00:42:10,233
I'm just having
a hard time with.
906
00:42:11,500 --> 00:42:13,233
[Robyn] Tony and Mykelti
want me there,
907
00:42:13,300 --> 00:42:14,667
and they want Christine there.
908
00:42:14,667 --> 00:42:18,433
This is the deal.
We see a lot of things
behind each other's backs.
909
00:42:19,567 --> 00:42:22,233
My plan is to play nice.
910
00:42:22,300 --> 00:42:24,767
Being there for my wife,
super important.
911
00:42:24,767 --> 00:42:27,066
Having kids come back,
best part.