1 00:00:01,034 --> 00:00:02,586 Previously on Sister Wives... 2 00:00:02,586 --> 00:00:04,586 Mykelti is pregnant with twins. 3 00:00:04,586 --> 00:00:07,241 And so we have to have a party to celebrate that. 4 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:08,448 Hello! 5 00:00:08,448 --> 00:00:09,793 Hey, Tony. 6 00:00:09,793 --> 00:00:12,000 Mykelti's like, "Dad and Robyn are here." 7 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:13,034 Your stuff. 8 00:00:13,034 --> 00:00:14,551 Oh, thank you. Thank you. 9 00:00:14,551 --> 00:00:16,241 Well, I haven't seen Christine in months. 10 00:00:16,241 --> 00:00:17,172 Hi. 11 00:00:17,172 --> 00:00:19,896 I kept my distance and did not... 12 00:00:19,896 --> 00:00:21,172 greet Christine, 13 00:00:21,172 --> 00:00:23,655 because she told me she didn't want a relationship, 14 00:00:23,655 --> 00:00:25,689 and I don't want to push myself on her. 15 00:00:25,689 --> 00:00:27,758 Is your marriage with Kody over? 16 00:00:27,758 --> 00:00:28,965 I feel like I'm on trial, 17 00:00:28,965 --> 00:00:30,413 like I'm being cross-examined. 18 00:00:30,413 --> 00:00:33,379 It's really complicated because there's no legal marriage. 19 00:00:33,379 --> 00:00:35,034 He's not talking to me about it. 20 00:00:35,034 --> 00:00:38,241 So, I think I'm going to have to lawyer up. 21 00:00:38,241 --> 00:00:40,172 Kody and I are officially done. 22 00:00:40,172 --> 00:00:41,310 Oh, jeez! 23 00:00:41,310 --> 00:00:44,586 I'm upset that I was neglected and abandoned. 24 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:46,586 I wonder if Robyn will leave him? 25 00:00:46,586 --> 00:00:48,000 You know, I know who I am. 26 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:49,275 I'm confident in who I am. 27 00:00:49,275 --> 00:00:51,137 And he's going to wake up one day 28 00:00:51,137 --> 00:00:52,482 and be like, "Wow... 29 00:00:52,482 --> 00:00:54,793 What the hell did I just do?" 30 00:00:54,793 --> 00:00:56,827 He's going to be accountable for that. 31 00:00:57,689 --> 00:00:59,379 Whether he likes it or not. 32 00:01:28,586 --> 00:01:31,000 Are you going to come to Oma? 33 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,793 Babies. 34 00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:34,551 Oh, hi, Archer. 35 00:01:35,586 --> 00:01:36,586 Babe, I made you food. 36 00:01:36,586 --> 00:01:37,482 Hello, Ace. 37 00:01:37,482 --> 00:01:39,000 - Thank you. - Oh, my gosh. 38 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,586 Hi, boys. 39 00:01:40,586 --> 00:01:43,482 Your Oma missed you so much. 40 00:01:43,482 --> 00:01:46,586 I missed you. I didn't see you all day. 41 00:01:46,586 --> 00:01:48,896 Mykelti just barely had the twins. 42 00:01:48,896 --> 00:01:50,482 Like, Ace and Archer 43 00:01:50,482 --> 00:01:52,241 are so cute, so delightful. 44 00:01:52,241 --> 00:01:54,137 But they're really newborn, 45 00:01:54,137 --> 00:01:55,068 like, she had to have them 46 00:01:55,068 --> 00:01:57,034 Cesarean section in the hospital. 47 00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:57,896 She left pregnant, 48 00:01:57,896 --> 00:01:59,000 and less than an hour later 49 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,586 she came back with twins. 50 00:02:00,586 --> 00:02:02,172 It was amazing. 51 00:02:02,172 --> 00:02:03,689 How was your first night home? 52 00:02:03,689 --> 00:02:05,172 - It was good, It was nice. - You know that's... 53 00:02:05,172 --> 00:02:06,103 that's like a record. 54 00:02:06,103 --> 00:02:07,379 You had your Cesarean. 55 00:02:07,379 --> 00:02:08,379 I don't think it's a record. 56 00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:09,586 Yes, it is. You had your... 57 00:02:09,586 --> 00:02:11,379 You were in the hospital for one night. 58 00:02:11,379 --> 00:02:13,896 Ace and Archer are fraternal twins. 59 00:02:13,896 --> 00:02:16,586 You can definitely tell who is who. 60 00:02:16,586 --> 00:02:20,379 So, last night I was definitely hurting a lot. 61 00:02:20,379 --> 00:02:22,000 Worst night of sleep 62 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:25,344 of my entire, entire life honestly. My stomach, 63 00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:27,000 just because everything's loose in there 64 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,862 would kind of move over and slide 65 00:02:28,862 --> 00:02:30,379 so it would pull the scar. 66 00:02:30,379 --> 00:02:32,482 So, no matter how I slept, 67 00:02:32,482 --> 00:02:34,689 it hurt so bad. 68 00:02:34,689 --> 00:02:37,275 But then I'd also have to get up 69 00:02:37,275 --> 00:02:38,689 and then sit up 70 00:02:38,689 --> 00:02:40,241 so that I could hold the baby 71 00:02:40,241 --> 00:02:42,000 and try to nurse one of the boys 72 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:42,793 and Robyn helped me 73 00:02:42,793 --> 00:02:43,689 through all of it. 74 00:02:43,689 --> 00:02:45,137 Um, what did we do? 75 00:02:45,137 --> 00:02:46,379 Oh, we put a mattress pad down 76 00:02:46,379 --> 00:02:47,379 in our closet, 77 00:02:47,379 --> 00:02:48,379 Robyn slept in the closet. 78 00:02:48,379 --> 00:02:49,241 Seriously? 79 00:02:49,241 --> 00:02:50,275 And she had both boys with her. 80 00:02:50,275 --> 00:02:51,275 And then, when they would, wake up 81 00:02:51,275 --> 00:02:52,034 and be hungry, 82 00:02:52,034 --> 00:02:53,482 she brought the boys to me, 83 00:02:53,482 --> 00:02:54,965 helped me, like, sit up and stuff, 84 00:02:54,965 --> 00:02:55,896 and then I'd feed one of the boys 85 00:02:55,896 --> 00:02:57,689 and then give the boy back to, uh, 86 00:02:57,689 --> 00:02:59,275 to Robyn and she'd go back to bed. 87 00:02:59,275 --> 00:03:00,896 So, I know that some people will think, 88 00:03:00,896 --> 00:03:02,137 "Well, why are you sleeping 89 00:03:02,137 --> 00:03:03,448 in the closet? That's weird." 90 00:03:03,448 --> 00:03:04,379 But then it's just like, 91 00:03:04,379 --> 00:03:05,310 well, it's really close. 92 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:07,655 It's convenient, their closet is huge. 93 00:03:07,655 --> 00:03:09,034 You know, just... 94 00:03:09,034 --> 00:03:10,034 I could be close. 95 00:03:10,034 --> 00:03:11,034 She didn't get any sleep. 96 00:03:11,034 --> 00:03:12,172 She's sleeping right now. 97 00:03:12,172 --> 00:03:14,137 She doesn't even... and she wouldn't want it. 98 00:03:15,793 --> 00:03:17,758 Guaranteed Robyn didn't sleep at all. 99 00:03:17,758 --> 00:03:18,689 There's no way. 100 00:03:18,689 --> 00:03:19,758 But she got to hold the babies. 101 00:03:19,758 --> 00:03:21,241 That's the most important part. 102 00:03:21,931 --> 00:03:22,793 Ysabel. 103 00:03:25,379 --> 00:03:26,758 I'll trade you places. 104 00:03:26,758 --> 00:03:28,137 - Going behind you. 105 00:03:28,137 --> 00:03:29,172 Hello. 106 00:03:35,310 --> 00:03:36,862 I'm really grateful that, you know, 107 00:03:36,862 --> 00:03:37,793 Robyn could be there 108 00:03:37,793 --> 00:03:40,000 and she really was helpful. 109 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,000 It sounds, like, especially, with those... 110 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,413 those first few hours. 111 00:03:44,379 --> 00:03:46,965 I can remember when Logan was born, 112 00:03:46,965 --> 00:03:48,965 Christine was brand new in the family. 113 00:03:48,965 --> 00:03:50,793 She and Kody had just married a few months ahead. 114 00:03:50,793 --> 00:03:53,482 And I remember Christine keeping Logan for me one night. 115 00:03:53,482 --> 00:03:54,448 And that was 116 00:03:54,448 --> 00:03:55,862 the most awesome thing, 117 00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:56,827 'cause, like, I could sleep. 118 00:03:56,827 --> 00:03:58,655 And so, having somebody do that 119 00:03:58,655 --> 00:03:59,517 while you are at home 120 00:03:59,517 --> 00:04:01,448 in your own bed, resting, 121 00:04:01,448 --> 00:04:03,172 is huge. 122 00:04:03,172 --> 00:04:04,275 Look, I will say 123 00:04:04,275 --> 00:04:05,896 when it comes to the kids, 124 00:04:05,896 --> 00:04:07,241 we really hope that we can all 125 00:04:07,241 --> 00:04:09,379 co-parent together peacefully. 126 00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:10,275 So, baby slept good. 127 00:04:10,275 --> 00:04:11,586 How was Avalon with them? 128 00:04:11,586 --> 00:04:13,241 She like kind of put one of the boys 129 00:04:13,241 --> 00:04:14,862 in her arms for a second, 130 00:04:14,862 --> 00:04:16,551 and then she started crying. 131 00:04:16,551 --> 00:04:17,586 Wait. What? 132 00:04:17,586 --> 00:04:18,482 Tony had a kid 133 00:04:18,482 --> 00:04:20,000 - and I had a kid. 134 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,586 She, like, realized that we're not holding her. 135 00:04:23,586 --> 00:04:24,758 I don't know, it was sad. 136 00:04:24,758 --> 00:04:25,586 That's one of the saddest things 137 00:04:25,586 --> 00:04:26,551 I've ever heard. 138 00:04:26,551 --> 00:04:27,551 - Yeah, that was rough. Yeah. 139 00:04:27,551 --> 00:04:30,689 Our whole world revolved around Avalon. 140 00:04:30,689 --> 00:04:31,896 And she knew it. 141 00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:35,068 And in one day everything changed. 142 00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:37,034 And everything became hard. 143 00:04:37,034 --> 00:04:38,344 I'm sorry, you guys. 144 00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:39,793 I'm so sorry. 145 00:04:39,793 --> 00:04:41,172 She looked at her mom, 146 00:04:41,172 --> 00:04:43,137 then she looked at her dad, 147 00:04:43,137 --> 00:04:44,551 and she realized her whole world 148 00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:45,482 was going to change. 149 00:04:45,482 --> 00:04:46,586 It's so sad. 150 00:04:46,586 --> 00:04:47,482 We're going to need to spend 151 00:04:47,482 --> 00:04:49,275 some extra time with Avalon, 152 00:04:49,275 --> 00:04:50,275 for sure. 153 00:04:50,275 --> 00:04:51,275 Oh, you got Maria here. 154 00:04:51,275 --> 00:04:52,379 How long is Robyn going to stay? 155 00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:54,586 She wants to be home for Thanksgiving. 156 00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:55,379 So, no matter what, 157 00:04:55,379 --> 00:04:56,965 I think she'll leave Wednesday. 158 00:04:56,965 --> 00:04:58,379 Thanksgiving is less than a week. 159 00:04:58,379 --> 00:05:01,172 So, I'm going to be making Thanksgiving dinner. 160 00:05:01,172 --> 00:05:03,137 'Cause it's Mykelti's year to host. 161 00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:04,379 I'm going to cook a little bit, 162 00:05:04,379 --> 00:05:06,379 hold the baby, cook a little bit, hold the baby. 163 00:05:06,379 --> 00:05:09,689 So, this year has little to do about the food. 164 00:05:09,689 --> 00:05:11,482 What is cool is, so Jessie, 165 00:05:11,482 --> 00:05:14,965 one of the labor and delivery nurses, 166 00:05:14,965 --> 00:05:16,379 she was the one that kind of took care of... 167 00:05:16,379 --> 00:05:17,482 She was one of the nurses 168 00:05:17,482 --> 00:05:18,862 that took care of Archer when he came out. 169 00:05:18,862 --> 00:05:20,482 Um, they both had their own team... 170 00:05:20,482 --> 00:05:22,448 Hey, Robyn. 171 00:05:22,448 --> 00:05:24,275 Hey. - Hey. 172 00:05:24,275 --> 00:05:25,896 I hear you slept in the closet 173 00:05:25,896 --> 00:05:27,862 with the babies all night? 174 00:05:27,862 --> 00:05:29,310 That not even your life, right? 175 00:05:30,482 --> 00:05:31,689 Nice. 176 00:05:31,689 --> 00:05:32,413 Did you sleep well? 177 00:05:32,413 --> 00:05:33,379 Did you have a good nap? 178 00:05:33,379 --> 00:05:34,344 Yeah. 179 00:05:34,344 --> 00:05:35,793 - Good. - Yeah. 180 00:05:35,793 --> 00:05:39,172 My desire and intention 181 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,379 has always been to have 182 00:05:41,379 --> 00:05:43,344 a good relationship with Christine. 183 00:05:43,344 --> 00:05:45,344 That's what I'm putting forward. 184 00:05:45,344 --> 00:05:48,448 Maybe this is kind of laying a foundation 185 00:05:48,448 --> 00:05:50,793 for future interaction, you know. 186 00:05:50,793 --> 00:05:52,275 So that it's positive. 187 00:05:52,275 --> 00:05:53,275 So, time wise, 188 00:05:53,275 --> 00:05:54,758 they're probably not too hungry. 189 00:05:54,758 --> 00:05:55,862 It's more like-- 190 00:05:56,793 --> 00:05:58,000 Yay! Yeah. 191 00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,620 - So, they're... 192 00:06:01,206 --> 00:06:02,586 Oh, I bet. 193 00:06:02,586 --> 00:06:04,000 Uh, partially, 194 00:06:07,103 --> 00:06:09,310 They really don't necessarily need the food right now. 195 00:06:11,586 --> 00:06:12,793 That's amazing. - Yep. 196 00:06:12,793 --> 00:06:14,000 That's amazing. 197 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,103 It'll help. 198 00:06:15,103 --> 00:06:16,241 So, you think they're gonna keep taking them? 199 00:06:16,241 --> 00:06:17,655 - Maybe? - Mmm-hmm. Yeah. 200 00:06:17,655 --> 00:06:19,000 Yeah, you know, it's a little bit awkward 201 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,448 that Robyn's here, of course. 202 00:06:20,448 --> 00:06:23,000 You know, we're not on... 203 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,896 the best of terms, huh. 204 00:06:24,896 --> 00:06:25,896 I wish I didn't feel awkward. 205 00:06:25,896 --> 00:06:27,586 That's just... It's just stupid. 206 00:06:27,586 --> 00:06:29,068 This is the last... 207 00:06:29,068 --> 00:06:31,310 It's not even about me at all. 208 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:34,241 Yes. 209 00:06:37,310 --> 00:06:39,689 Like the kids were, like, super unsettled. 210 00:06:39,689 --> 00:06:41,482 She's like, "They need to poop." 211 00:06:41,482 --> 00:06:43,448 And so she comes over here, 212 00:06:43,448 --> 00:06:45,310 and opens one up... 213 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,000 He did? Yeah. 214 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,586 Yes, yes. 215 00:06:50,586 --> 00:06:51,586 It was so funny. 216 00:06:51,586 --> 00:06:52,793 Good. 217 00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:53,655 He would just like, poop in another diaper, like, 218 00:06:53,655 --> 00:06:55,034 okay, we'll wait, and that... 219 00:06:55,034 --> 00:06:56,793 So, I went through, like, three diapers 220 00:06:56,793 --> 00:06:59,137 because he just kept pooping and pooping. 221 00:07:00,137 --> 00:07:01,103 - Nice. - I kept thinking he was done. 222 00:07:01,103 --> 00:07:03,103 I know that the dynamic 223 00:07:03,103 --> 00:07:05,689 between my mom and Robyn is really difficult. 224 00:07:05,689 --> 00:07:08,137 This new transition that my family is going through, 225 00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:09,137 it's, it's hard. 226 00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:11,275 But I think that it just stands up 227 00:07:11,275 --> 00:07:14,793 for the incredible character of both of my moms. 228 00:07:14,793 --> 00:07:18,551 That they are able to work with each other 229 00:07:18,551 --> 00:07:21,655 for somebody that needs them. 230 00:07:21,655 --> 00:07:23,379 When Robyn came in the family 231 00:07:23,379 --> 00:07:25,689 and it was obvious her and Mykelti had a great relationship. 232 00:07:25,689 --> 00:07:26,896 It was everything that I hoped for. 233 00:07:26,896 --> 00:07:28,379 When I was so excited 234 00:07:28,379 --> 00:07:29,965 about having a plural family, 235 00:07:29,965 --> 00:07:31,896 I was hoping that my kids would have 236 00:07:31,896 --> 00:07:33,586 a great relationship with other moms. 237 00:07:33,586 --> 00:07:34,793 It's great that Mykelti has 238 00:07:34,793 --> 00:07:36,137 a great relation with Robyn. 239 00:07:36,137 --> 00:07:37,172 It's what I've always wanted 240 00:07:37,172 --> 00:07:39,172 for my kids to have. 241 00:07:39,172 --> 00:07:40,206 But, like, you take... 242 00:07:40,206 --> 00:07:41,655 just taking the kids out of the bassinet 243 00:07:41,655 --> 00:07:42,379 and just keeping them with you 244 00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:43,793 helped so much. 245 00:07:43,793 --> 00:07:45,344 'Cause I was like, "Okay, I don't have to worry. 246 00:07:45,344 --> 00:07:46,689 I don't have to do anything. 247 00:07:46,689 --> 00:07:47,965 Robyn's got the kids 248 00:07:47,965 --> 00:07:49,000 I'm going to pass out." 249 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,206 And I solid passed out. 250 00:07:51,586 --> 00:07:52,965 Yeah, Christine was great. 251 00:07:52,965 --> 00:07:54,482 We just co-grandparented, 252 00:07:54,482 --> 00:07:57,137 and that's kind of always what I've wanted. 253 00:07:57,137 --> 00:07:58,482 I understand, and I have to respect 254 00:07:58,482 --> 00:08:00,172 that she doesn't want it the same way, 255 00:08:00,172 --> 00:08:01,448 and I know that she was 256 00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:04,241 probably just making sure that... 257 00:08:04,241 --> 00:08:06,758 she was supportive to Tony and Mykelti, 258 00:08:06,758 --> 00:08:08,172 which I appreciate and so it worked out. 259 00:08:08,172 --> 00:08:10,413 It was fine. It was great. 260 00:08:15,517 --> 00:08:18,758 I just had to leave... 261 00:08:18,758 --> 00:08:20,862 the twins and Avalon 262 00:08:20,862 --> 00:08:22,137 and Tony and Mykelti 263 00:08:22,137 --> 00:08:24,000 and I just don't want to go. 264 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,000 I have had the most beautiful experience 265 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,689 with those babies. 266 00:08:27,689 --> 00:08:29,551 The family is in a weird place, 267 00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:32,172 as I guess you would expect from a divorce. 268 00:08:32,172 --> 00:08:35,034 The struggles that we have had have been... 269 00:08:35,034 --> 00:08:37,068 so foreign... 270 00:08:37,068 --> 00:08:39,586 from what our family was. 271 00:08:39,586 --> 00:08:41,896 It's been such a sweet experience, 272 00:08:41,896 --> 00:08:43,793 being a part of all of this 273 00:08:43,793 --> 00:08:46,896 and being there... 274 00:08:46,896 --> 00:08:48,172 at the hospital, and helping 275 00:08:48,172 --> 00:08:49,586 taking care of the babies, 276 00:08:49,586 --> 00:08:53,586 and getting to bond with them. 277 00:08:53,586 --> 00:08:54,793 and... 278 00:08:54,793 --> 00:08:56,551 I just really love being a grandma. 279 00:08:58,241 --> 00:09:01,034 I... I'm having a very difficult time 280 00:09:01,034 --> 00:09:02,793 connecting with all of my kids. 281 00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:05,137 And, of course, twins being born 282 00:09:05,137 --> 00:09:07,689 is going to give us all something special. 283 00:09:07,689 --> 00:09:08,689 Something... 284 00:09:08,689 --> 00:09:11,172 maybe, maybe that heals, helps to... 285 00:09:11,172 --> 00:09:13,137 you know, move things forward. 286 00:09:14,827 --> 00:09:16,068 I don't know if it would heal anything 287 00:09:16,068 --> 00:09:17,172 between me and ex-wives, 288 00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:18,655 but I'm gonna have to go see 289 00:09:18,655 --> 00:09:19,724 those babies. 290 00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:21,275 I gotta see those grandkids, you know. 291 00:09:21,275 --> 00:09:23,482 So I'm gonna be excited to go see them. 292 00:09:23,482 --> 00:09:25,275 And this is going to give us more opportunity 293 00:09:25,275 --> 00:09:27,068 to open the doors with... 294 00:09:27,068 --> 00:09:28,275 my children. 295 00:09:28,275 --> 00:09:29,896 Ah, I don't know. I don't know. 296 00:09:29,896 --> 00:09:31,758 I'm gonna go home 297 00:09:31,758 --> 00:09:32,793 and not see them every day. 298 00:09:32,793 --> 00:09:33,965 I'm having a hard time 299 00:09:33,965 --> 00:09:35,000 even thinking about it. 300 00:09:36,137 --> 00:09:38,310 It's just been such a sweet, sweet experience. 301 00:09:43,172 --> 00:09:45,862 So, you want some dark meat, right? 302 00:09:45,862 --> 00:09:48,275 Robyn and I don't behave like a married couple 303 00:09:48,275 --> 00:09:50,068 when my other wives are around. 304 00:09:50,068 --> 00:09:52,448 So, we weren't acting like a married couple 305 00:09:52,448 --> 00:09:53,620 with Meri in our presence. 306 00:09:53,620 --> 00:09:56,034 I've heard Kody say multiple times 307 00:09:56,034 --> 00:09:57,000 how awkward it is 308 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,689 'cause he can't show the affection 309 00:09:58,689 --> 00:10:00,137 to Robyn that he wants. 310 00:10:00,137 --> 00:10:01,586 I just really don't want to go 311 00:10:01,586 --> 00:10:02,689 be a third wheel 312 00:10:02,689 --> 00:10:04,931 at Robyn and Kody's house. 313 00:10:20,103 --> 00:10:21,931 Okay? All right. So... 314 00:10:21,931 --> 00:10:23,379 I guess we'll worry about you later. 315 00:10:23,379 --> 00:10:24,862 This is the first Thanksgiving 316 00:10:24,862 --> 00:10:26,172 that Robyn and I are having 317 00:10:26,172 --> 00:10:28,000 with just our children, alone. 318 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:30,103 We have never had this before. 319 00:10:30,103 --> 00:10:32,172 Ooh, there's another nice piece. 320 00:10:32,172 --> 00:10:34,689 So, I had had kind of tentative plans 321 00:10:34,689 --> 00:10:36,275 to take a trip to California 322 00:10:36,275 --> 00:10:37,172 over Thanksgiving, 323 00:10:37,172 --> 00:10:39,068 and that fell through. 324 00:10:39,068 --> 00:10:42,344 Yeah, Robyn did reach out and ask 325 00:10:42,344 --> 00:10:45,379 if I wanted to go over there for Thanksgiving, 326 00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:47,000 and... I'm not going to do that. 327 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,551 That's just weird. 328 00:10:49,758 --> 00:10:51,586 Oh, my God! 329 00:10:51,586 --> 00:10:54,379 Last year, Meri was here with our Thanksgiving, 330 00:10:54,379 --> 00:10:56,000 and it was a pleasant experience. 331 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,586 But Robyn and I don't behave like 332 00:10:57,586 --> 00:10:59,172 a married couple when... 333 00:10:59,172 --> 00:11:00,758 my other wives are around. 334 00:11:00,758 --> 00:11:01,758 So... 335 00:11:01,758 --> 00:11:02,896 we weren't acting like a married couple 336 00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,241 with Meri in our presence. 337 00:11:04,241 --> 00:11:05,862 That's mostly on Robyn, to be fair, 338 00:11:05,862 --> 00:11:08,172 that's because Robyn is very sensitive to other people. 339 00:11:08,172 --> 00:11:10,000 She wants to be very careful about their feelings. 340 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:12,103 So when Meri's there with us 341 00:11:12,103 --> 00:11:13,172 at our Thanksgiving, 342 00:11:13,172 --> 00:11:14,965 I'm not close with Meri, 343 00:11:14,965 --> 00:11:17,103 And now, I'm no longer close with Robyn 344 00:11:17,103 --> 00:11:18,586 because Meri is present. 345 00:11:18,586 --> 00:11:20,689 And Robyn wants to be sensitive to Meri. 346 00:11:20,689 --> 00:11:22,137 That's it. That's nice. 347 00:11:22,137 --> 00:11:24,172 I've heard Kody say multiple times 348 00:11:24,172 --> 00:11:25,931 how awkward it is 349 00:11:25,931 --> 00:11:26,862 that I'm even there 350 00:11:26,862 --> 00:11:28,551 'cause he can't show the affection 351 00:11:28,551 --> 00:11:30,965 and the adoration to Robyn that he wants to. 352 00:11:30,965 --> 00:11:33,068 And I'm not going to inhibit that. 353 00:11:33,620 --> 00:11:36,000 You know, I'm not... 354 00:11:36,793 --> 00:11:37,931 a member of the family. 355 00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:39,068 I just really don't want 356 00:11:39,068 --> 00:11:40,586 to go be a third wheel 357 00:11:40,586 --> 00:11:42,931 at Robyn and Kody's house. 358 00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:52,586 What's wrong? What? 359 00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:55,482 What this year, this Thanksgiving, this year is about 360 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:56,931 and what we're most grateful for, 361 00:11:56,931 --> 00:11:58,931 is those babies being healthy. 362 00:11:58,931 --> 00:12:00,172 And we're just grateful for... 363 00:12:00,172 --> 00:12:01,931 that they have this little family now, 364 00:12:01,931 --> 00:12:03,275 and everybody's doing great. 365 00:12:03,275 --> 00:12:05,965 Let's get the bowls up there and put on the table. 366 00:12:05,965 --> 00:12:08,241 Ysabel's here, Aspyn and Mitch. 367 00:12:08,241 --> 00:12:10,000 And then we have Tony's family. 368 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,758 Tony's mom, Maria, 369 00:12:11,758 --> 00:12:13,344 dad, Antonio and then some 370 00:12:13,344 --> 00:12:15,137 of his siblings are here as well. 371 00:12:16,448 --> 00:12:18,000 So Gwendlyn came into town 372 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,482 with her girlfriend, Bea. 373 00:12:19,482 --> 00:12:22,275 Uh, Gwendlyn and Bea together are adorable. 374 00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,344 They are a cute couple. They're really cute. 375 00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:25,275 If they wanted to get married, 376 00:12:25,275 --> 00:12:26,551 I'd be fine with it, just saying. 377 00:12:26,551 --> 00:12:27,931 I'd be fine. 378 00:12:32,896 --> 00:12:34,448 So, this year, Logan and Michelle 379 00:12:34,448 --> 00:12:35,931 are hosting Thanksgiving 380 00:12:35,931 --> 00:12:37,241 in Las Vegas, at their house, 381 00:12:37,241 --> 00:12:38,000 they just bought a house. 382 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:39,172 We're gonna be there. 383 00:12:39,172 --> 00:12:40,275 It's gonna be very fun. 384 00:12:40,275 --> 00:12:41,344 Oh, okay. 385 00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:42,275 With the garlic cloves, 386 00:12:42,275 --> 00:12:43,172 do you want to smack... 387 00:12:43,172 --> 00:12:44,172 I want to smash them 388 00:12:44,172 --> 00:12:45,551 and put them in there. 389 00:12:45,551 --> 00:12:46,758 Paedon is Christine's 390 00:12:46,758 --> 00:12:47,793 biological son. 391 00:12:47,793 --> 00:12:48,827 And he always says to me, 392 00:12:48,827 --> 00:12:49,827 "Well, you're my other mom." 393 00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:52,448 So, I only had one boy, 394 00:12:52,448 --> 00:12:53,172 just Paedon. 395 00:12:53,172 --> 00:12:55,137 And he escaped 396 00:12:55,137 --> 00:12:56,586 living a house full of women, 397 00:12:56,586 --> 00:12:57,758 all the time. 398 00:12:57,758 --> 00:12:58,931 Rub outer... 399 00:12:58,931 --> 00:12:59,896 Like he is my kid, 400 00:12:59,896 --> 00:13:01,275 but he's not my biological child. 401 00:13:01,275 --> 00:13:02,827 But it doesn't seem any different. 402 00:13:02,827 --> 00:13:03,586 He just fits right in 403 00:13:03,586 --> 00:13:04,517 with all my boys. 404 00:13:04,517 --> 00:13:06,896 It just feels like he belongs there. 405 00:13:06,896 --> 00:13:07,931 He was always over 406 00:13:07,931 --> 00:13:08,758 at Janelle's house, 407 00:13:08,758 --> 00:13:10,551 He's definitely benefited 408 00:13:10,551 --> 00:13:11,965 from me living polygamy, 409 00:13:11,965 --> 00:13:13,068 'cause he has so many brothers now 410 00:13:13,068 --> 00:13:13,965 and he loves it. 411 00:13:13,965 --> 00:13:15,137 Him doing Thanksgiving 412 00:13:15,137 --> 00:13:16,655 with Janelle is just awesome. 413 00:13:18,517 --> 00:13:20,172 You want some of the drumstick? 414 00:13:20,172 --> 00:13:21,586 I'll have the drumstick. 415 00:13:21,586 --> 00:13:22,655 Drumstick. 416 00:13:22,655 --> 00:13:25,310 I want a drink, but I don't know about that. 417 00:13:25,965 --> 00:13:27,758 I love my children, 418 00:13:27,758 --> 00:13:29,275 and we're having a nice time. 419 00:13:29,275 --> 00:13:31,344 But I miss the family. 420 00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:33,275 I miss the big experience. 421 00:13:33,275 --> 00:13:35,000 Hey, listen, very exciting 422 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,965 to have all, you here for Thanksgiving. 423 00:13:36,965 --> 00:13:38,379 This is a very nice layout.888 424 00:13:38,379 --> 00:13:40,000 Thank you, ladies, for this setup. 425 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:43,000 All the food that's been cooked, it's very nice. 426 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,344 Thanksgiving was always such 427 00:13:44,344 --> 00:13:45,517 a big deal, 428 00:13:45,517 --> 00:13:46,689 when we were all together as a family. 429 00:13:46,689 --> 00:13:48,172 We'd have 50 people over. 430 00:13:48,172 --> 00:13:50,758 Like, we never had Thanksgiving that was small. 431 00:13:51,689 --> 00:13:54,344 We originally started out with the vision888888 432 00:13:54,344 --> 00:13:55,758 of having one family,88888 433 00:13:55,758 --> 00:13:57,137 and we worked very hard. 434 00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:58,172 Even when Robyn came,888 435 00:13:58,172 --> 00:13:59,896 we tried very, very hard to...8 436 00:13:59,896 --> 00:14:02,482 still have that one family identity.888 437 00:14:02,482 --> 00:14:04,965 I never imagined that we would not ever spend 438 00:14:04,965 --> 00:14:06,448 Thanksgiving together. 439 00:14:06,448 --> 00:14:07,586 But I'm really enjoying 440 00:14:07,586 --> 00:14:08,827 this smaller Thanksgiving, 441 00:14:08,827 --> 00:14:09,448 and I'm with people 442 00:14:09,448 --> 00:14:10,827 I want to be with. 443 00:14:10,827 --> 00:14:11,758 It's actually fun. 444 00:14:11,758 --> 00:14:13,241 I'm enjoying it. 445 00:14:13,241 --> 00:14:14,137 Are you good? 446 00:14:14,137 --> 00:14:16,172 I'm really struggling 447 00:14:16,172 --> 00:14:18,758 in many ways that it still feels 448 00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:19,827 like something's missing. 449 00:14:19,827 --> 00:14:20,862 This is small. 450 00:14:20,862 --> 00:14:23,586 There's just the seven of us. 451 00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:24,586 It's quiet. 452 00:14:24,586 --> 00:14:26,000 It feels safe. 453 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,896 By safe, I simply mean 454 00:14:27,896 --> 00:14:29,241 that we are all 455 00:14:29,241 --> 00:14:31,103 in a state of respect with each other. 456 00:14:31,103 --> 00:14:35,275 Ten years ago, I was safe for everybody, 457 00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:38,758 but they weren't safe for each other. 458 00:14:38,758 --> 00:14:42,931 It shows me in so many ways the dysfunction 459 00:14:42,931 --> 00:14:44,551 of just the basics 460 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:45,758 in plural marriage. 461 00:14:47,172 --> 00:14:48,551 I've heard that Meri is not going88 462 00:14:48,551 --> 00:14:49,931 to be spending Thanksgiving 463 00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:50,758 with Kody and Robyn, 464 00:14:50,758 --> 00:14:52,000 which kind of surprised me, 465 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,172 And I wondered who she was 466 00:14:53,172 --> 00:14:54,137 gonna be spending it with. 467 00:14:54,137 --> 00:14:55,344 I hope somebody. 468 00:14:57,862 --> 00:14:59,379 I think Meri deserves a lot more, 469 00:14:59,379 --> 00:15:00,379 and I think it's time for her 470 00:15:00,379 --> 00:15:02,068 to do something different. 471 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:03,551 I've thought that for a while, 472 00:15:03,551 --> 00:15:05,068 and she still is around. 473 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,586 I don't really plan on telling anybody 474 00:15:08,586 --> 00:15:10,827 about mine and Kody's decision. 475 00:15:10,827 --> 00:15:12,758 I don't feel like it's necessary 476 00:15:12,758 --> 00:15:15,000 for me to go make a big... 477 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:16,310 announcement about it. 478 00:15:17,103 --> 00:15:19,689 I'm actually staying in town. 479 00:15:19,689 --> 00:15:21,586 It's just gonna be an easy day 480 00:15:21,586 --> 00:15:23,275 of just... 481 00:15:23,275 --> 00:15:25,275 getting caught up on work. 482 00:15:25,275 --> 00:15:27,241 Logic says that when 483 00:15:27,241 --> 00:15:30,344 a man and a woman decide they are 484 00:15:30,344 --> 00:15:32,689 not going to be married any longer, 485 00:15:32,689 --> 00:15:34,344 they also, therefore, 486 00:15:34,344 --> 00:15:36,551 don't spend Thanksgiving together. 487 00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:42,448 See, right there? 488 00:15:42,448 --> 00:15:43,551 That's what Thanksgiving's about. 489 00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:45,793 It's just these babies laying on Tony 490 00:15:45,793 --> 00:15:47,275 and sleeping, finally. 491 00:15:47,275 --> 00:15:48,655 I mean, come on, 492 00:15:49,793 --> 00:15:51,448 The kids are a week old today, 493 00:15:51,448 --> 00:15:54,000 - Congratulations, baby. 494 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,655 Happy week birthday. 495 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:57,586 I want my other children in my life. 496 00:15:57,586 --> 00:15:59,344 I don't know how to do that. 497 00:15:59,344 --> 00:16:02,896 I believe I'm grateful for the faith 498 00:16:02,896 --> 00:16:04,379 and hope that I have, 499 00:16:04,379 --> 00:16:08,103 that things get better in the future. 500 00:16:13,586 --> 00:16:15,241 So, yeah, I miss... 501 00:16:15,241 --> 00:16:16,103 I miss everyone. 502 00:16:16,103 --> 00:16:18,482 And I wish we were together. 503 00:16:18,482 --> 00:16:20,655 So, yeah. 504 00:16:24,896 --> 00:16:27,137 It's a trigger point for me. 505 00:16:27,137 --> 00:16:28,655 I'm tired of being angry. 506 00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:29,689 I just don't understand 507 00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,275 why you're not like... 508 00:16:31,275 --> 00:16:32,862 Ugh, like... 509 00:16:32,862 --> 00:16:34,137 just talking to the kids 510 00:16:34,137 --> 00:16:35,068 as much as you can, like, 511 00:16:35,068 --> 00:16:36,448 I just don't know why you're not 512 00:16:36,448 --> 00:16:38,000 reaching out to them more. 513 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:40,862 I'm having a hard time, 514 00:16:40,862 --> 00:16:43,655 not like, feeling like 515 00:16:43,655 --> 00:16:45,827 losing respect for you 516 00:16:45,827 --> 00:16:47,310 a little bit. 517 00:17:01,551 --> 00:17:04,379 So, it is Tuesday, 518 00:17:04,379 --> 00:17:06,241 the week after Thanksgiving, 519 00:17:06,241 --> 00:17:10,862 and I spent Thanksgiving here, in my bed... 520 00:17:10,862 --> 00:17:13,000 sick. 521 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,413 Meri had told us she wasn't gonna 522 00:17:14,413 --> 00:17:15,586 do Thanksgiving with us. 523 00:17:15,586 --> 00:17:17,275 She was gonna do it with her children. 524 00:17:17,275 --> 00:17:19,000 Like, I found out later 525 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,896 that she was at home sick. 526 00:17:20,896 --> 00:17:22,448 I just was like, "Oh, my gosh, 527 00:17:22,448 --> 00:17:24,000 she's right here." 528 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,137 After my conversation, 529 00:17:27,344 --> 00:17:28,689 with... 530 00:17:29,896 --> 00:17:32,379 Kody in April, 531 00:17:32,379 --> 00:17:33,551 I had already kind of made 532 00:17:33,551 --> 00:17:35,413 the... decision 533 00:17:35,413 --> 00:17:38,241 that I wasn't going to spend Thanksgiving 534 00:17:38,241 --> 00:17:41,000 with Kody and Robyn. 535 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,586 I mean, I don't know, 536 00:17:42,586 --> 00:17:45,000 exactly, what's going on... 537 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:46,655 with Meri and Kody's relationship. 538 00:17:46,655 --> 00:17:50,000 Like, I heard that they were separated. 539 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:54,724 And... I don't know where she's living. 540 00:17:54,724 --> 00:17:56,310 I really have no idea. 541 00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:58,172 I don't really talk to Meri. 542 00:17:58,172 --> 00:18:00,827 So, I'm not sure. 543 00:18:00,827 --> 00:18:04,000 I think, I think that me being sick, honestly, 544 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,344 is just my body's way of saying, 545 00:18:07,344 --> 00:18:09,482 "Hey, it's time you stop, 546 00:18:10,068 --> 00:18:13,000 and you think about this 547 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,068 and you figure it out." 548 00:18:14,068 --> 00:18:15,275 So... 549 00:18:38,275 --> 00:18:40,862 Earlier, this morning, Robyn and I 550 00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:42,034 got into a conversation 551 00:18:42,034 --> 00:18:43,551 after we got the kids to school. 552 00:18:43,551 --> 00:18:46,241 Robyn is extremely upset 553 00:18:46,241 --> 00:18:49,000 that I'm not reaching out more to my children. 554 00:18:50,655 --> 00:18:51,931 I was putting pressure 555 00:18:51,931 --> 00:18:52,862 on Kody 556 00:18:52,862 --> 00:18:54,482 to work on his relationships 557 00:18:54,482 --> 00:18:55,586 with his kids, 558 00:18:55,586 --> 00:18:57,965 and it triggered him 559 00:18:57,965 --> 00:18:59,413 and it upset him. 560 00:18:59,413 --> 00:19:00,965 Well, this all just came to a head. 561 00:19:00,965 --> 00:19:02,620 Our voices are starting to raise. 562 00:19:02,620 --> 00:19:03,724 I'm not gonna sit here 563 00:19:03,724 --> 00:19:05,034 and fight with you 564 00:19:05,034 --> 00:19:08,379 and have a rift in our relationship, 565 00:19:08,379 --> 00:19:10,586 caused by these people, 566 00:19:10,586 --> 00:19:13,724 who have created the biggest rift in my life. 567 00:19:13,724 --> 00:19:14,517 I'm not... 568 00:19:14,517 --> 00:19:16,931 I'm not doing that, okay? 569 00:19:19,172 --> 00:19:20,137 So, I just decided 570 00:19:20,137 --> 00:19:21,827 I needed to take off. 571 00:19:22,689 --> 00:19:25,000 So Kody's, uh, coming home. 572 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,758 He let me know he's on his way. 573 00:19:26,758 --> 00:19:28,896 I have to talk to him more about this. 574 00:19:28,896 --> 00:19:31,103 I have to have it sink in. 575 00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:32,655 It's just something that is just 576 00:19:32,655 --> 00:19:33,724 eating at me. 577 00:19:33,724 --> 00:19:35,896 I'm so worried about these kids. 578 00:19:38,862 --> 00:19:40,689 Hey. - Hi. 579 00:19:40,689 --> 00:19:41,793 How you doing? 580 00:19:41,793 --> 00:19:43,068 Good. 581 00:19:43,068 --> 00:19:44,206 Come back. 582 00:19:44,206 --> 00:19:48,137 Mmm... maybe we can finish the conversation. 583 00:19:48,137 --> 00:19:49,586 Are you feeling a little better? 584 00:19:49,586 --> 00:19:51,172 Well, I'm a little emotional. 585 00:19:51,172 --> 00:19:52,551 - Well, I mean-- - I was just thinking 586 00:19:52,551 --> 00:19:54,275 about what you're saying, so... 587 00:19:54,275 --> 00:19:55,586 Do you mind if we talk about it? 588 00:19:55,586 --> 00:19:56,965 Are you in a place where we can talk 589 00:19:56,965 --> 00:19:57,965 about it more? 590 00:19:57,965 --> 00:20:00,758 Yeah, I... It's a trigger point for me. 591 00:20:00,758 --> 00:20:02,241 You know... 592 00:20:02,241 --> 00:20:03,896 I'm tired of being angry. 593 00:20:05,137 --> 00:20:06,793 I know. I'm tired of it, too. 594 00:20:06,793 --> 00:20:07,862 - It's hard. - I. I... 595 00:20:07,862 --> 00:20:10,000 I'm tired of feeling betrayed. 596 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,862 What has happened is in the divorce, 597 00:20:12,862 --> 00:20:14,413 in the divorces, 598 00:20:14,413 --> 00:20:16,310 the ugly finger of blame has come out. 599 00:20:16,310 --> 00:20:18,103 "Dad, you were never at my house." 600 00:20:18,103 --> 00:20:19,758 I'm sorry. I had four wives. 601 00:20:19,758 --> 00:20:21,862 I was at your house, though, because... 602 00:20:21,862 --> 00:20:24,862 the other wife was complaining that I was at your house. 603 00:20:24,862 --> 00:20:27,724 I just don't understand why you're not like... 604 00:20:29,034 --> 00:20:32,000 like just talking to the kids as much as you can, like... 605 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,965 I just don't know why you're not reaching out to them more. 606 00:20:34,965 --> 00:20:38,000 This has been going on for so long. 607 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:40,724 - They're trash talking. - No. They're hurting. 608 00:20:40,724 --> 00:20:46,103 Robyn. You saw how they were at the wedding. 609 00:20:46,103 --> 00:20:49,000 I recently went to a family wedding. The whole family was there. 610 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,793 There was so much animosity from some of my family. 611 00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:56,413 There's a couple of my kids who wouldn't even engage me at the wedding. 612 00:20:56,413 --> 00:20:58,517 Some of them wouldn't even talk to me. 613 00:20:58,517 --> 00:21:00,620 - But some of the kids have flat out rejected me. - I know. 614 00:21:00,620 --> 00:21:03,551 You saw Madison take her kids and scuttled them away from me. 615 00:21:03,551 --> 00:21:06,000 - Yeah, I saw her. - She never told me she was pregnant. 616 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:09,000 She never told me she was gonna have a baby. 617 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:10,724 The only thing that kids are upset with him 618 00:21:10,724 --> 00:21:12,310 is the way he has treated his family, 619 00:21:12,310 --> 00:21:15,068 the way he has completely, like, ditched out. 620 00:21:15,068 --> 00:21:17,896 And really, Maddy doesn't have any contact with him. 621 00:21:17,896 --> 00:21:19,862 She is very protective of her children. 622 00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:22,758 Kody has not been there since Evie was born, 623 00:21:22,758 --> 00:21:26,482 and Evie's three and a half, and she didn't want him to just drop in 624 00:21:26,482 --> 00:21:29,586 and be like, "Oh, I'm your grandpa," 625 00:21:29,586 --> 00:21:31,344 and then be like, "What? Who is this guy?" 626 00:21:31,344 --> 00:21:32,620 You know what I mean? 627 00:21:32,620 --> 00:21:35,000 It's unrealistic expectation for grandparents 628 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,793 to be in their grandchildren's lives all the time, 629 00:21:36,793 --> 00:21:43,689 especially if you move your children to an entirely different coast. 630 00:21:43,689 --> 00:21:46,413 I have work and a life in Flagstaff. 631 00:21:46,413 --> 00:21:50,655 They're purposefully leaving me out of their lives 632 00:21:50,655 --> 00:21:54,000 to punish me for a crime I did not commit. 633 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:59,172 I am only guilty of not falling madly in love with their mothers. 634 00:21:59,172 --> 00:22:02,586 - Well-- - Madison actually called Janelle 635 00:22:02,586 --> 00:22:05,413 saying, "Dad said he didn't love you." 636 00:22:05,413 --> 00:22:07,551 I know. But couldn't you, like, reach out to her? 637 00:22:07,551 --> 00:22:12,172 Every time I talk to her, she spreads gossip about me to the rest of the family. 638 00:22:12,172 --> 00:22:14,241 I never said that I didn't love Janelle. 639 00:22:14,241 --> 00:22:16,931 On the contrary, I actually said that I loved Janelle. 640 00:22:16,931 --> 00:22:19,068 This was some rumor that was created in the family. 641 00:22:19,068 --> 00:22:20,689 That's just so division. 642 00:22:20,689 --> 00:22:25,344 Our family was killed by gossip. 643 00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:29,413 Kody has this narrative about Madison, where she's such the gossip, 644 00:22:29,413 --> 00:22:31,793 but he is as big of a gossip. 645 00:22:31,793 --> 00:22:36,034 He'd always say that Meri was difficult, or Christine was or whatever, 646 00:22:36,034 --> 00:22:39,241 like, he would always say things like that to me about Meri and Christine. 647 00:22:39,241 --> 00:22:43,620 He never said it about Robyn, but he would say stuff about Meri and Christine. 648 00:22:43,620 --> 00:22:45,517 What they've done is they've got... 649 00:22:45,517 --> 00:22:52,000 There's all this contempt that they have for me. Listen, I need-- 650 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,344 I'm just having such a hard time with this. 651 00:22:54,344 --> 00:22:57,413 Well, I will work, I will reach out to, 652 00:22:57,413 --> 00:23:01,379 I will love those children who will allow me to do it. 653 00:23:01,379 --> 00:23:04,551 And in time, maybe the rest of them will come back around. 654 00:23:04,551 --> 00:23:07,310 You know... You know... 655 00:23:11,344 --> 00:23:14,000 You know that my biological father did not... 656 00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:16,000 - I know and-- - ...do what he was supposed to 657 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:18,000 as far as a dad is concerned. 658 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:20,413 Yeah, but I've not been doing that. 659 00:23:21,344 --> 00:23:24,758 When I was little, my parents got a divorce. 660 00:23:24,758 --> 00:23:30,931 He lived with one wife in another city, and then my mom lived alone. 661 00:23:30,931 --> 00:23:36,482 I remember confronting my biological father, saying, "What happened? Why?" 662 00:23:36,482 --> 00:23:39,448 All he really did was just make a bunch of lame excuses 663 00:23:39,448 --> 00:23:43,000 as to why he wasn't there for me when I was young. 664 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,896 And it just sucked. 665 00:23:45,896 --> 00:23:50,000 To Kody, I'm like, "Hey, listen. You don't want to be this guy. 666 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:53,689 I know you're hurting, but you don't want to be this guy." 667 00:23:53,689 --> 00:23:56,689 But don't you... I'm just struggling-- 668 00:23:56,689 --> 00:23:58,103 - I text one of my kids... - I'm starting-- 669 00:23:58,103 --> 00:24:01,724 ...and they send back notes saying, "You're a piece of trash. 670 00:24:01,724 --> 00:24:04,551 I would never speak to you again anyway." 671 00:24:04,551 --> 00:24:06,034 I'm not trying to do anything... 672 00:24:06,034 --> 00:24:08,068 - Well, if you sit there long enough... - ...but have a relationship. 673 00:24:08,068 --> 00:24:09,448 ...and like-- 674 00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:12,517 I'm not going to do it with the rejection every single time, 675 00:24:12,517 --> 00:24:14,620 I'm not abandoning my children. 676 00:24:14,620 --> 00:24:17,896 They have betrayed me. Inadvertently, maybe. 677 00:24:17,896 --> 00:24:19,551 But they're kids and they're trying to-- 678 00:24:19,551 --> 00:24:21,000 No. They're adults. 679 00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:22,793 - They're your kids, though. - I know. 680 00:24:22,793 --> 00:24:24,827 - They're still young. - But they have animosity. 681 00:24:24,827 --> 00:24:30,724 I do not want to talk to a person who sits there with so much contempt. 682 00:24:30,724 --> 00:24:32,103 They need you. 683 00:24:32,103 --> 00:24:33,586 They can have me. 684 00:24:33,586 --> 00:24:37,241 They just don't need to treat me like crap to get me. 685 00:24:37,241 --> 00:24:41,241 They are purposefully leaving me out of their lives 686 00:24:41,241 --> 00:24:44,344 to punish me for a crime I did not commit. 687 00:24:44,344 --> 00:24:48,000 Experience with COVID. One, two, three divorces. 688 00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:52,275 The breakup of the family, the different directions, all the secrecy. 689 00:24:52,275 --> 00:24:57,482 All this upheaval, all this damage, all this tearing us apart. 690 00:24:57,482 --> 00:25:02,793 I don't know how we fix it or when we fix it or whether we fix it. 691 00:25:02,793 --> 00:25:04,689 It's like, "We want to sit down with you, Dad, 692 00:25:04,689 --> 00:25:07,000 and blame you for everything that happened." 693 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,000 There's no respect. 694 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:14,068 I'm having a hard time, not like feeling like... 695 00:25:14,793 --> 00:25:17,310 losing respect for you a little bit. 696 00:25:17,310 --> 00:25:20,413 - Just, I'm trying to be careful, maybe honest, but-- - Well, join the club. 697 00:25:20,413 --> 00:25:21,965 Robyn, did I... 698 00:25:21,965 --> 00:25:24,000 Do you know of something I did wrong 699 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:27,413 besides, not falling madly in love with their mothers. 700 00:25:27,413 --> 00:25:30,448 Every... Okay. I'm sorry, but there's two sides to all of it. 701 00:25:30,448 --> 00:25:33,862 Okay? I know that you weren't perfect in those marriages. 702 00:25:33,862 --> 00:25:37,620 - They weren't either. Okay, I'm not, but I'm not-- - Well then, fine. 703 00:25:37,620 --> 00:25:39,344 - But let's go from there. But I don't think anyone-- 704 00:25:39,344 --> 00:25:43,275 But every one of those kids who has shut me out 705 00:25:43,275 --> 00:25:47,827 - is blaming me for what happened, or you... - Or-- 706 00:25:47,827 --> 00:25:50,000 - ...which is a bunch of crap. - That's just misguided. 707 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,000 I don't need to sit down with them and have to defend you. 708 00:25:57,896 --> 00:26:00,862 Usually after I have a date, I don't like, you know, 709 00:26:00,862 --> 00:26:02,620 say anything or anything like that. 710 00:26:02,620 --> 00:26:06,000 But I just had a date with this guy, David. 711 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:09,758 His pictures were beautiful. It was him with these eyes. 712 00:26:09,758 --> 00:26:11,172 We've already planned our second date. 713 00:26:11,172 --> 00:26:12,655 I'm just telling you that straight up. 714 00:26:12,655 --> 00:26:15,344 They need you in their life. 715 00:26:15,344 --> 00:26:16,517 They can have me. 716 00:26:16,517 --> 00:26:19,000 All they have to do is pick up the phone and call. 717 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:22,034 You want to ask the question, "What did I do to deserve this? 718 00:26:22,034 --> 00:26:23,793 What did I do wrong?" 719 00:26:33,448 --> 00:26:34,517 Okay. 720 00:26:36,172 --> 00:26:37,413 Okay. 721 00:26:38,655 --> 00:26:41,655 Usually, after I have a date, I don't, like, you know, 722 00:26:41,655 --> 00:26:43,172 say anything or anything like that. 723 00:26:43,172 --> 00:26:47,172 But I just had a date with this guy, David. 724 00:26:47,172 --> 00:26:49,724 We've been talking for, like, a month. 725 00:26:49,724 --> 00:26:55,482 I signed up for a dating website that is for people with kids. 726 00:26:56,137 --> 00:26:57,413 It's crazy. I was so excited. 727 00:26:57,413 --> 00:26:59,862 The first time that I got on, I met David. 728 00:26:59,862 --> 00:27:03,655 His pictures were beautiful. It was him with these eyes. 729 00:27:03,655 --> 00:27:05,517 Pictures do not do him justice. 730 00:27:05,517 --> 00:27:08,137 His eyes were beautiful and I told him. Oh, my gosh. 731 00:27:08,137 --> 00:27:10,068 We're walking into the restaurant and I go, 732 00:27:10,068 --> 00:27:12,068 "I just have to tell you, I think your eyes are beautiful." 733 00:27:12,068 --> 00:27:14,000 Just like that. 734 00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:18,103 And so we met up at a breakfast place and we sat down at a table. 735 00:27:18,103 --> 00:27:19,655 And he was like, "This is kind of far away. 736 00:27:19,655 --> 00:27:21,000 Let's get closer to each other." 737 00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:22,379 I'm like, "Okay." 738 00:27:22,379 --> 00:27:25,413 So we scooted our chairs closer to each other and talked. 739 00:27:25,413 --> 00:27:27,413 We just started talking about everything. 740 00:27:27,413 --> 00:27:31,827 Anyway, oh! It went so great. 741 00:27:31,827 --> 00:27:34,551 At this point, I'm still just not interested in dating. 742 00:27:34,551 --> 00:27:36,620 I was married to Kody for 30 years, 743 00:27:36,620 --> 00:27:39,862 and Kody is a complicated person. 744 00:27:39,862 --> 00:27:43,000 And there's a lot of like what Robyn used to call the roller coaster ride, 745 00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:44,931 and I don't want to do that anymore. 746 00:27:44,931 --> 00:27:49,586 I just want to be me and do me and, like, pursue my own... 747 00:27:49,586 --> 00:27:51,482 pursue my own things. 748 00:27:51,482 --> 00:27:53,034 You know, at this point, 749 00:27:53,034 --> 00:27:55,275 I can go to bed when I want, I can get up when I want, 750 00:27:55,275 --> 00:27:58,655 I can I do what I want, I can travel where I want. 751 00:27:58,655 --> 00:28:02,275 Oh, I love it. It's just fun. 752 00:28:02,275 --> 00:28:05,689 It's easy and it's fun and it's exciting 753 00:28:05,689 --> 00:28:08,310 because I can do what I want to do. 754 00:28:08,310 --> 00:28:11,448 But anyway, we just have this date and he's a man. 755 00:28:11,448 --> 00:28:14,965 He's not a guy. He's not a dude. He's a man. 756 00:28:14,965 --> 00:28:16,517 He has eight kids. 757 00:28:16,517 --> 00:28:20,448 So he goes, "How many kids do you have?" And I'm like, "Six." 758 00:28:20,448 --> 00:28:23,827 And it killed me to just tell him I had six kids only. 759 00:28:23,827 --> 00:28:25,137 We've already planned our second date. 760 00:28:25,137 --> 00:28:26,379 I'm just telling you that straight up 761 00:28:26,379 --> 00:28:28,827 He's everything I've been looking for, I'm just saying. 762 00:28:28,827 --> 00:28:31,655 I'm putting it on the line on the second date. 763 00:28:31,655 --> 00:28:34,724 But if I can't say who I am, I live polygamy, 764 00:28:34,724 --> 00:28:37,827 that's part of, like, a really big part of me, 765 00:28:37,827 --> 00:28:39,793 and Janelle's kids and my kids all together. 766 00:28:39,793 --> 00:28:41,689 I claim Janelle's kids as my kids, 767 00:28:41,689 --> 00:28:44,000 and I'm going to do things with Janelle for the rest of my life, 768 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:46,379 and he probably needs to know that. 769 00:28:46,379 --> 00:28:48,068 I'm just saying. 770 00:28:54,103 --> 00:28:57,137 I don't want to judge Kody, but at the same time, 771 00:28:57,137 --> 00:29:02,310 I feel like you just have to let your kids know you're there. 772 00:29:02,310 --> 00:29:09,413 If I were him, I would be calling, emailing, texting, 773 00:29:09,413 --> 00:29:13,000 maybe showing up flying out there, you know, whatever. 774 00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:16,655 Every one of those kids who has shut me out 775 00:29:16,655 --> 00:29:18,827 is blaming me for what happened. 776 00:29:18,827 --> 00:29:20,413 - Or you. - Or-- 777 00:29:20,413 --> 00:29:23,241 So what I do? Just say, "Okay. You can call Robyn whatever you want." 778 00:29:23,241 --> 00:29:26,551 No, you can say they can talk to me. 779 00:29:26,551 --> 00:29:29,000 I would love to work it out with each of them, 780 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:30,965 any of them that have an issue. 781 00:29:30,965 --> 00:29:33,827 Where this hate for Robyn came from, I don't know. 782 00:29:33,827 --> 00:29:36,000 But it's like if I can't protect her from it, 783 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:37,758 I'm just not going to engage it. 784 00:29:37,758 --> 00:29:39,827 She never did anything to you. 785 00:29:39,827 --> 00:29:41,413 What are you complaining about? 786 00:29:41,413 --> 00:29:43,379 I just loved her. And I didn't love your mother. 787 00:29:43,379 --> 00:29:46,482 Okay, so there's the guilt. The guilt lies there. 788 00:29:46,482 --> 00:29:51,068 I'm just having a hard time with this, and I don't want to pile on. 789 00:29:51,068 --> 00:29:52,724 I know you're going through a lot. 790 00:29:52,724 --> 00:29:54,724 I know that you're going through a lot. 791 00:29:54,724 --> 00:29:57,482 I see you struggling. 792 00:29:57,482 --> 00:29:59,586 I see you angry... 793 00:29:59,586 --> 00:30:03,482 and I'm dealing with my own grief about it. 794 00:30:04,793 --> 00:30:07,793 It's just... I... Okay. 795 00:30:09,379 --> 00:30:12,275 I need to get this because I just-- 796 00:30:12,275 --> 00:30:14,344 Robyn, I'll make the effort. 797 00:30:14,344 --> 00:30:19,034 Okay, so I've spent a year here just lamenting the situation. 798 00:30:19,034 --> 00:30:24,000 When I get over that, those children who are open to me will get my attention. 799 00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:27,000 Well, don't you think you could do a little bit of communication? 800 00:30:29,862 --> 00:30:33,517 - At the wedding-- - Just to let them know it's open? 801 00:30:33,517 --> 00:30:38,068 - I tried connect with Madison. - Have you been trying to communicate with them? 802 00:30:38,068 --> 00:30:40,620 Gabriel? Yes, I have. 803 00:30:40,620 --> 00:30:42,172 - Any of the other kids? - Hunter. 804 00:30:42,172 --> 00:30:44,586 But I'm received with total contempt. 805 00:30:44,586 --> 00:30:47,034 I'm sitting here with a broken heart 806 00:30:47,034 --> 00:30:50,068 over these people who have shut me out. 807 00:30:50,068 --> 00:30:51,517 That aren't talking to me. 808 00:30:51,517 --> 00:30:54,586 You want to ask the question, "What did I do to deserve this?" 809 00:30:54,586 --> 00:30:56,931 Like, what did I do wrong? 810 00:30:56,931 --> 00:30:59,000 Divorce is hard on kids. 811 00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:00,620 - Yeah, but it's a total betrayal. - Separation is hard. 812 00:31:00,620 --> 00:31:04,103 It's not about the divorce. I'm not even talking about their mothers. 813 00:31:04,103 --> 00:31:06,517 I know, but they just... They're getting caught in it. 814 00:31:06,517 --> 00:31:12,103 They're getting fed information that is not true or is one-sided. 815 00:31:12,103 --> 00:31:14,413 Well, they can be mad at their mothers ten years from now, 816 00:31:14,413 --> 00:31:15,275 when they want a relationship. 817 00:31:15,275 --> 00:31:17,827 They need you in their life. 818 00:31:17,827 --> 00:31:19,034 They can have me. 819 00:31:19,034 --> 00:31:22,241 All they have to do is pick up the phone and call. 820 00:31:22,241 --> 00:31:26,413 All they have to do is answer when I call 821 00:31:26,413 --> 00:31:29,310 without having total contempt for me, 822 00:31:29,310 --> 00:31:36,000 This argument, this disparity in relationship with my children 823 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:40,482 is specifically in my mind because of [bleep] talk. 824 00:31:40,482 --> 00:31:43,689 There's this whirlwind of disappointment 825 00:31:43,689 --> 00:31:46,103 from the family breaking up or whatever. 826 00:31:46,103 --> 00:31:49,586 And it's like, "Well, blame Dad. Dad screwed up." 827 00:31:50,275 --> 00:31:55,482 Right. I did screw up. I gave up. 828 00:31:56,448 --> 00:31:59,000 I gave up on love because it wasn't enough love, 829 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:01,655 and I'm pretty sure they're going to say, 830 00:32:01,655 --> 00:32:07,655 "That's Dad's fault," and, well, you can blame me, and I'm fine. 831 00:32:07,655 --> 00:32:12,655 Just don't bring contempt to our conversation. 832 00:32:12,655 --> 00:32:15,862 I am so angry that when somebody opens up to me, 833 00:32:15,862 --> 00:32:17,482 I'm likely to lash out. I can't... 834 00:32:17,482 --> 00:32:21,000 Robyn, I can't even get it straight with you right now. 835 00:32:21,689 --> 00:32:23,172 This takes some time. 836 00:32:23,172 --> 00:32:27,586 I've got to get over what has happened and how I've been treated. 837 00:32:27,586 --> 00:32:29,758 You need to figure it out because it's hard on us. 838 00:32:29,758 --> 00:32:33,551 I... Listen, when the time is right, I'll finally feel forgiving. 839 00:32:33,551 --> 00:32:35,758 I think. I hope. 840 00:32:35,758 --> 00:32:38,793 But it doesn't take anything for me to just get forgiving 841 00:32:38,793 --> 00:32:40,689 - and then to not even have one of these-- - Not even like just, 842 00:32:40,689 --> 00:32:45,000 like getting on your knees and asking God for help or... 843 00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:46,310 Well, yeah. 844 00:32:46,310 --> 00:32:47,896 I'm pretty desperate. 845 00:32:48,655 --> 00:32:50,689 - 'Cause I know-- - It takes more than just that. 846 00:32:50,689 --> 00:32:54,000 It's going to take a change of heart with me. 847 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:57,758 It's all so complicated that I can't make sense of it. 848 00:32:57,758 --> 00:33:02,758 When I go to God, there's still a wall for me. 849 00:33:02,758 --> 00:33:06,517 Well, I've completely lost my religion, which is sad. 850 00:33:07,896 --> 00:33:09,034 We're sisters. 851 00:33:09,034 --> 00:33:11,000 Sisters from the same mister. 852 00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:13,551 She's a sister from the same mister, 853 00:33:13,551 --> 00:33:16,137 and he's a brother from another mother. 854 00:33:16,137 --> 00:33:20,310 I feel like Kody was a very present dad in a lot of ways. 855 00:33:22,862 --> 00:33:26,758 To truth be told, that was what made me fall in love with Kody. 856 00:33:26,758 --> 00:33:29,724 Seeing him be present with his kids. 857 00:33:29,724 --> 00:33:31,068 Does everybody remember Robyn? 858 00:33:31,068 --> 00:33:32,689 Yes. 859 00:33:32,689 --> 00:33:34,758 - Do you guys like Robyn? - Yeah. 860 00:33:34,758 --> 00:33:37,724 Well, Robyn likes us. 861 00:33:37,724 --> 00:33:42,448 But he's so hurt by some of the children's rejection and anger 862 00:33:42,448 --> 00:33:45,689 because he's just like, "Wait a minute, I was there for you. 863 00:33:45,689 --> 00:33:49,896 "Why is that your rejection of me is so drastic it doesn't fit 864 00:33:49,896 --> 00:33:51,241 what has happened?" 865 00:33:51,241 --> 00:33:53,551 Do you know anybody who's gone through three divorces? 866 00:33:53,551 --> 00:33:55,103 - In-- - No. 867 00:33:55,103 --> 00:33:57,413 - The fact that you're-- - Like really kind of almost one or two years. 868 00:33:57,413 --> 00:34:00,068 No. Like... Kody, I know-- 869 00:34:00,068 --> 00:34:01,413 I'm not looking for your pity. 870 00:34:01,413 --> 00:34:02,793 - I'm looking for understanding. - I'm not-- 871 00:34:02,793 --> 00:34:04,793 No, I'm... I am. 872 00:34:04,793 --> 00:34:07,344 - I am. - But you're losing respect for me. 873 00:34:07,344 --> 00:34:09,310 'Cause it's just... 874 00:34:09,310 --> 00:34:13,034 Is that from your own experience with your father? 875 00:34:13,034 --> 00:34:16,068 I mean, like, I have not betrayed these kids. 876 00:34:16,068 --> 00:34:20,517 I just know how much I needed my dad. 877 00:34:21,689 --> 00:34:27,620 My biological father, still, like my whole life, was very absent. 878 00:34:27,620 --> 00:34:31,896 Did not fight for the relationship, did not, um... 879 00:34:33,448 --> 00:34:34,413 care to have one. 880 00:34:34,413 --> 00:34:36,758 Still doesn't really care to have one. 881 00:34:36,758 --> 00:34:39,586 I'll see him now and then. He'll tell me how much he loves me. 882 00:34:39,586 --> 00:34:43,103 But he's very absent. 883 00:34:43,896 --> 00:34:48,068 The kids who are mad at me get together 884 00:34:48,068 --> 00:34:49,482 and they're all colluding... 885 00:34:49,482 --> 00:34:53,482 Not all, but they're colluding against me. 886 00:34:53,482 --> 00:34:55,241 - Okay. - It's a betrayal. 887 00:34:55,241 --> 00:34:59,137 - Had days where I want to talk about it. - Listen, they're hurting. 888 00:34:59,137 --> 00:35:03,172 They... Their whole family is in pieces 889 00:35:03,172 --> 00:35:05,896 and they don't know how it's going to turn out. 890 00:35:05,896 --> 00:35:08,517 That's got to be hard for them. 891 00:35:10,034 --> 00:35:12,517 Don't you see that? 892 00:35:12,517 --> 00:35:17,000 Oh, I see that and I can be forgiving of it completely, Robyn. 893 00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:19,551 It's tough in separations and divorces. 894 00:35:19,551 --> 00:35:22,137 People drag their kids into it. 895 00:35:22,137 --> 00:35:25,896 - It's hard. It's complicated. - Robyn-- 896 00:35:25,896 --> 00:35:29,379 - The kids get very mixed up in their heads. - What do you want me to do? 897 00:35:29,379 --> 00:35:32,068 I've reached out to him. 898 00:35:32,068 --> 00:35:37,310 I don't want to judge Kody, but at the same time, I feel like... 899 00:35:37,310 --> 00:35:41,586 and I don't think Kody should be accepting it. 900 00:35:41,586 --> 00:35:46,034 I think that Kody should be camping out on their doorsteps and saying, 901 00:35:46,034 --> 00:35:47,551 "Hey, you're going to talk to me." 902 00:35:47,551 --> 00:35:50,655 Because sometimes, that's just what you got to do 903 00:35:50,655 --> 00:35:52,793 is, you know, when you care about someone, 904 00:35:52,793 --> 00:35:55,103 is just say, "Hey, you need to talk to me." 905 00:35:55,103 --> 00:36:01,344 Kody, honey, yes, your kids need you. 906 00:36:01,344 --> 00:36:04,000 They need you in their life. 907 00:36:20,172 --> 00:36:26,413 Kody, honey, yes, your kids need you. 908 00:36:26,413 --> 00:36:29,275 They need you in their life. 909 00:36:29,275 --> 00:36:31,689 I know they're angry right now, but I need you. 910 00:36:31,689 --> 00:36:34,068 Can I just have some time then? 911 00:36:34,068 --> 00:36:38,724 Can you give me enough space with this 912 00:36:38,724 --> 00:36:41,275 without losing respect for me? 913 00:36:41,275 --> 00:36:45,551 - Yeah. Yeah, I will. Yeah. - Let's just understand. 914 00:36:45,551 --> 00:36:51,586 It boggles my mind that I am being punished for a crime I never committed. 915 00:36:51,586 --> 00:36:53,344 Well, they don't understand that. 916 00:36:53,344 --> 00:36:55,413 - They think I did something? - Yes. 917 00:36:55,413 --> 00:36:58,137 What would they think I did? I didn't love their mother? 918 00:36:58,137 --> 00:37:00,724 Anything that they've been told. Okay? 919 00:37:00,724 --> 00:37:03,827 There was a lot of misunderstandings through COVID. 920 00:37:03,827 --> 00:37:07,482 Some of them thought that you wanted to be here instead of with them, 921 00:37:07,482 --> 00:37:10,965 and that's why you made the rules, which is ridiculous. 922 00:37:10,965 --> 00:37:14,758 During COVID, there's two huge mistakes I probably made. 923 00:37:14,758 --> 00:37:19,448 I wanted the boys to move out because they couldn't comply to the COVID rules. 924 00:37:19,448 --> 00:37:23,172 That just became sort of a foolish power game. 925 00:37:24,482 --> 00:37:30,310 And one of those mistakes was also not going to Ysabel's surgery. 926 00:37:31,586 --> 00:37:35,689 And that put some bad blood between a bunch of us. 927 00:37:35,689 --> 00:37:39,862 It's... In plural marriage, it's tough. 928 00:37:39,862 --> 00:37:43,000 It can get confusing for wives and kids 929 00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:45,827 when it comes to the husband and the father. 930 00:37:45,827 --> 00:37:50,000 And they can think someone is more important or someone is more loved or... 931 00:37:50,000 --> 00:37:52,344 And I know you love all your kids. 932 00:37:52,344 --> 00:37:55,689 With plural marriage, It's very difficult 933 00:37:55,689 --> 00:37:59,344 for a dad to get one on one time with kids. 934 00:37:59,344 --> 00:38:00,758 He has to be really present. 935 00:38:00,758 --> 00:38:02,896 But then, at the same time, it's still difficult 936 00:38:02,896 --> 00:38:06,137 just because of math, just because time. 937 00:38:06,137 --> 00:38:10,724 It's very natural for kids to kind of become closer to their mother. 938 00:38:10,724 --> 00:38:13,034 Just last week while I was skiing, I was up there. 939 00:38:13,034 --> 00:38:14,724 It was nice and sunny. 940 00:38:14,724 --> 00:38:16,965 - And I texted Gabriel. - Yeah. 941 00:38:16,965 --> 00:38:22,068 And I just thought, I just... I... So I reached out to him. 942 00:38:23,172 --> 00:38:24,448 Nothing yet. 943 00:38:24,448 --> 00:38:27,965 Keep trying. Okay? I'm glad to hear you are trying. 944 00:38:27,965 --> 00:38:30,862 I don't try enough. I know that. 945 00:38:30,862 --> 00:38:35,344 That's because it's not safe to go there and I'm triggering like crazy. 946 00:38:35,344 --> 00:38:36,758 I know what you're going through. 947 00:38:36,758 --> 00:38:39,724 I don't want to trigger while I'm in a conversation with them. 948 00:38:39,724 --> 00:38:44,379 I am so angry about what has happened that if I talk to my kids, 949 00:38:44,379 --> 00:38:48,931 I'm worried that they'll trigger me with an accusation. 950 00:38:48,931 --> 00:38:52,896 Really, I'll be honest with you. I don't have the bandwidth... 951 00:38:52,896 --> 00:38:59,344 yet to go to God in gratitude and try and fill my love tank with the spirit of God. 952 00:38:59,344 --> 00:39:01,275 I'm just bitter right now. 953 00:39:01,275 --> 00:39:04,724 - Okay? I'm not gonna argue. - I'm too hot-headed right now, Robyn. 954 00:39:04,724 --> 00:39:08,241 - All I'll do is more damage. - Okay. I just want to know you're trying. 955 00:39:08,241 --> 00:39:09,724 - Okay? - Okay. 956 00:39:09,724 --> 00:39:14,551 Because this needs... These relationships do need to get mended. 957 00:39:14,551 --> 00:39:18,275 You know what, Robyn? We have had such a struggle with this. 958 00:39:18,275 --> 00:39:20,068 I'd almost rather just take some time 959 00:39:20,068 --> 00:39:22,275 to get in a better place with you and me, 960 00:39:22,275 --> 00:39:25,413 because I've been in this place for a very, very long time 961 00:39:25,413 --> 00:39:28,793 and it's hurt us more than it's hurt them. 962 00:39:31,379 --> 00:39:34,000 Thank you for saying that. I appreciate that. That's good to hear. 963 00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:38,896 Well, I'm mad as hell, and I'm not meaning for it to come out on you. 964 00:39:38,896 --> 00:39:41,551 My heart is broken when I'm sitting here 965 00:39:41,551 --> 00:39:44,586 with the person that I love the most in the world. 966 00:39:45,482 --> 00:39:48,310 And my heart's still broken. What do I do with that? 967 00:39:48,310 --> 00:39:50,827 And my heart's broken, too. 968 00:39:50,827 --> 00:39:54,724 You react with this very special and sweet emotion that you have. 969 00:39:54,724 --> 00:39:57,413 I am angry. 970 00:39:57,413 --> 00:40:00,137 I'm angry out of my mind. 971 00:40:00,862 --> 00:40:02,172 The kids are... 972 00:40:02,172 --> 00:40:05,793 They are always the collateral damage when this happens. 973 00:40:05,793 --> 00:40:07,724 But I'm not trying to damage them. 974 00:40:07,724 --> 00:40:09,724 No, but just... Just keep trying. 975 00:40:09,724 --> 00:40:12,413 That's all I'm asking. Okay? 976 00:40:12,413 --> 00:40:15,827 I've had one of my kids just said, "You're an ass [bleep]. 977 00:40:15,827 --> 00:40:18,413 I'm never talking to you again. 978 00:40:18,413 --> 00:40:21,620 You manipulated me and you brainwashed me." 979 00:40:21,620 --> 00:40:26,000 Some people think that parental-child relationships shouldn't, 980 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:27,586 don't have to be reciprocal, 981 00:40:27,586 --> 00:40:30,137 but when they're adults, yeah, they do. 982 00:40:30,137 --> 00:40:31,965 I'm not gonna reach out forever. 983 00:40:31,965 --> 00:40:34,655 I'm willing to make the effort. 984 00:40:34,655 --> 00:40:38,758 But somebody else is going to have to be on the other end of that 985 00:40:38,758 --> 00:40:40,655 and make some effort too. 986 00:40:40,655 --> 00:40:43,448 I'm not going to camp out on somebody's doorstep. 987 00:40:43,448 --> 00:40:44,931 I really need the space to do... 988 00:40:44,931 --> 00:40:48,689 I'm not fixing this today, tomorrow or next week. 989 00:40:48,689 --> 00:40:51,862 - Okay. - And with the kids who are reaching out to me 990 00:40:51,862 --> 00:40:53,172 and who are listening to me-- 991 00:40:53,172 --> 00:40:56,137 Just promise me you'll keep trying at least a little bit 992 00:40:56,137 --> 00:40:59,413 until you're ready. Promise me. 993 00:41:00,793 --> 00:41:02,862 Okay. A little bit. 994 00:41:02,862 --> 00:41:07,965 Just enough, a little bit to let him know that you still care. 995 00:41:07,965 --> 00:41:10,068 - Please? - Okay. 996 00:41:10,068 --> 00:41:12,689 They need you and you need them. 997 00:41:16,896 --> 00:41:19,275 Thanks for coming down and talking to me 998 00:41:19,275 --> 00:41:20,827 before I went back in the house. 999 00:41:20,827 --> 00:41:22,586 I didn't want to go back to where we were. 1000 00:41:24,448 --> 00:41:27,586 I know those kids need their dad. 1001 00:41:27,586 --> 00:41:29,103 They need him. 1002 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:35,000 They need him to try harder. 1003 00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:37,517 It's his role. He's a dad. 1004 00:41:38,275 --> 00:41:41,241 I don't think he realizes how important that is. 1005 00:41:41,241 --> 00:41:46,517 He just doesn't grasp how important a dad is to a child. 1006 00:41:49,241 --> 00:41:50,517 Mmm. 1007 00:41:55,103 --> 00:41:57,862 Okay, so... Ahhh! David and I have gone out twice now. 1008 00:41:57,862 --> 00:42:00,827 God, he's just solid and he's real. 1009 00:42:00,827 --> 00:42:03,620 I really like him a lot. Just saying. Oh! 1010 00:42:03,620 --> 00:42:07,965 I think that Robyn definitely has a victim complex. 1011 00:42:07,965 --> 00:42:09,896 There's a lot of anger towards Robyn. 1012 00:42:09,896 --> 00:42:12,310 You know what I mean? They're leery of Robyn. 1013 00:42:12,310 --> 00:42:16,275 But I'm not hopeful for a relationship with Dad and Robyn. 1014 00:42:22,172 --> 00:42:27,482 For me, now, my prayer was just like, "Save me and Robyn. 1015 00:42:27,482 --> 00:42:30,758 Save our marriage, save us, Save the special 1016 00:42:30,758 --> 00:42:33,827 after this horrible experience of breaking up."