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[narrator] Previously
on Sister Wives...
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[Robyn] I know that Christine
is leaving,
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and Mykelti called me
and she was like,
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"Robyn, I think it would
be best if you came
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and you guys came
and said goodbye."
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I'm leaving in five minutes.
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This is such
an awkward moment.
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- Bye, Christine, good luck.
- [Christine] Bye. Thank you.
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So, it's very apparent
how awkward we all are,
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but Janelle and her kids
are on one side
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and Robyn and Kody
are on the other.
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None of us wanted to be here.
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You guys,
thank you for coming.
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Hey, it means a lot to me
that you came.
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[crying]
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[Robyn coughing]
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[Robyn] At this point,
after having COVID for a week,
I can't breathe very well.
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[Aurora] She could get worse.
She could get better.
We just don't know.
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So there is still that
to think about.
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You and I have been
acting like we weren't
a married couple
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for most of our
marriage, Janelle.
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Okay, I'm spitting mad now.
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The ship is sinking.
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[Meri] Janelle, and Robyn,
and Kody are gonna be
coming over here to my house,
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and we are going
to be talking.
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Janelle wants to show us
some of her plans
for her house
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that she's gonna be
putting on the property.
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- [Kody] Hi.
- [Robyn] Hi.
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- [Kody] How's it going?
- Okay.
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[Meri] But also,
this is the first time
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that we've all gotten
together and talked
since Christine left.
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And it's been, like,
over a couple of months,
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which is kinda weird for me.
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- How's it going?
- Good. How are you?
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[Kody] I'm living,
I'm breathing,
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I'm six feet over
instead of under.
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Robyn and I and our kids,
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all but Aurora, got COVID.
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And it was pretty rough.
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Just in case anybody cares,
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I'm COVID-free.
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[Kody laughing]
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- [Meri] I got COVID tested.
- [Kody] Did you test?
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- Well, yeah,
that's how I know. [laughs]
- [Kody] Jeez.
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Now that I've had it,
I'm still really weak.
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I'm still tired.
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You know, people who
only had it for three days,
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or just lost their sense
of smell,
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don't understand
what I went through.
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I joke about it,
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but I almost wanna
grab them around the throat
and like,
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"You don't know
what I went through!"
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Do you guys wanna see
my house plans?
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- Sure.
- [Kody] You guys
have all seen this, right?
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The lots, one, two, three,
four, five. There we go.
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But are we leaving that
the same that was already
decided then
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when there was five of us?
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And now there's four of us.
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- Yeah, I still wanna
get five lots...
- Okay.
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...because we can
and we should.
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We can build
something on there
and have a rental property.
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[Janelle] I have
my house plans done.
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It really isn't
anything different
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than what we have visualized
as a family months ago
for how the land is gonna be.
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I'm not really hoping
to get anyone to say,
"Oh, la-la-la,
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let's prioritize the money
and pay off the land,
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so we can finally build."
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I'm not expecting miracles.
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I'm just trying to, like,
"Hey, guys,
here, I have plans.
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I'm ready to go.
I have plans."
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When I asked Kody
about paying off the land,
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he'll say stuff like,
"I don't want you
to ask me again.
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I'm getting so mad
about you asking."
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And I'm like, "Okay."
But then I'm just
gonna keep asking.
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I just get a little bit
more time and I keep asking
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because this is,
this is my estate.
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Is everybody good with that?
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I mean, we, we still
okay doing these lots
this way.
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It's so weird just, like,
talking like this
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'cause we really
haven't talked,
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- the four of us since...
- [Meri] I... Yeah, I...
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This has not been
a discussion.
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With Christine leaving?
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- Well, yeah. Like...
- It's not a taboo subject.
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Do you guys
wanna talk about it?
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Well, it's just weird
that we're already,
like, talking about the land
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when we haven't really
touched base after...
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...she left.
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[Kody] We can talk about it.
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- You're acting weird
about it, Meri.
- I am?
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Oh, yeah, it seems like it.
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Like, do you have,
do you have something
you wanna say?
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I mean, it's totally cool.
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[laughing] You can...
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- [Robyn] It's okay. It's...
- [Kody] You can...
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He's just...
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I'm not acting weird.
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- I... I know, I can tell.
- [Robyn] Hey, it's all...
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Robyn's the one who
brought it up...
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- ...not me. [laughing]
- Well...
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I think we need to talk
more in this family.
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- [Kody] Well... [laughing]
- [Meri laughing]
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I feel like there's a big lack
of communication
in our family.
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And this is a big thing.
Come on.
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Um, this next part of my life
I want...
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- [Kody] Different.
- ...to be better.
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- With me and you,
or with everybody?
- With everybody.
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- [Kody] Okay.
- With everybody.
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Like relationships.
Like I think
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we have been sweeping
so much under the rug
for so many years
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and we need to deal
with these things.
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And Christine leaving's
like a wake-up call.
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I don't know what to say
because I just think we need
to get to pure honesty.
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- That's what I'm saying.
- But also too.
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- Okay.
- [Kody] Well, we're saying
pure honesty
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- Yes.
-'cause we've had this
fakiness about ourselves
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where we've been like, um,
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"We're such a happy family."
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And all that time,
Christine wasn't happy.
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[Robyn] One of the things
that happens in our family
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is something crazy, or big,
or painful, or hard happens,
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and we just
sort of gloss over it.
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[Janelle] You know,
I don't know what
there is really to discuss.
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I don't want
a Christine-bashing fest.
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And I don't really
need to process it.
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I think we've spent
too much time
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ignoring the struggle
we were having,
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and when we talk about
one house,
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Christine finally affirms
that we really don't want
one house.
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Well, that's what she said.
She didn't want one house.
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I mean, she wasn't
speaking for everybody, but...
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When we start talking
about the one house idea,
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Christine was very much
against it.
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And Kody had
a big conversation with her
privately about why.
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I know that he got
a lot of information
that he did not like,
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a lot of Christine's truth.
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So, and here we go.
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- There's the house.
- [child] Wow.
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- Whoa, that's a big house.
- [man] Whoa.
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[Christine]
That is a big house.
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You know what,
he can talk about this
as much as he wants
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with three other lovely ladies
in this room.
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I... I guess she was...
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She was speaking enough truth
to make me go think about it.
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The... Just how oppresive
it would be for everybody
to live together.
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Well, I mean,
I think Christine
was the most vocal
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about not wanting one house.
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Robyn said she didn't know.
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Meri was like, I don't know.
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I was the only one
who was like, "Yeah, yeah,
one house, one house."
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Everybody else was kinda
on the spectrum.
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You guys are still
not for one house.
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- [Meri laughs]
- After this year of COVID...
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[Meri] You don't have
to answer right now,
but like...
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...with the way that we have
treated each other this year
through COVID, no.
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I mean, I'm just gonna lay it
right on the table.
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I have been shocked
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at the way
the last year and a half
has gone.
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So, we would have to get
a lot of [bleep] figured out.
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Robyn is absolutely
right here.
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COVID exposed us.
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This last year and a half
has been...
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has really shattered...
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...what I, I thought
our family was.
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The sense I've got
is that we've failed
with Christine leaving.
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We're still here
and we don't need
to fail more.
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We need to fix it.
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- [Kyle] Well...
- We need to fix what
the problems are.
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All that the COVID,
and the quarantining,
and stuff like that,
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that did was reveal us.
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I know, and that's
what I'm trying to say,
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is we need to look at
what was revealed,
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and we need to work on it,
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or we're just gonna
sort of disappear as a family
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I don't know how to fix
what's going on.
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But they're not trying
to fix it either.
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This is... This is as much
pointed at me
as it is at anybody else.
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Like, are we going
to be a pod here?
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The home base. The nucleus.
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Whatever it is here
in Flagstaff.
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Or where the kids come home
like we talked about.
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Or are we just gonna...
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[sighs]
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Christine leaving...
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...has put me in
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...a very dark spot.
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[Janelle] Kody has told me
stories Robyn would share
with him
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about things Christine did,
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trying to get me on the side
of realizing
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that Christine was this
horrible sister wife,
or whatever.
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That's been going on
for years.
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So, I don't know why
all of a sudden
it's a shock
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that she should leave.
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[Robyn] You know,
I don't know
what conversations
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Janelle and Kody are having,
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but I learned a long time ago,
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00:09:01,310 --> 00:09:04,965
venting to Kody
about my frustrations
with my sister wives
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00:09:04,965 --> 00:09:07,758
actually harmed
my relationship with him.
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So I just don't do it.
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00:09:09,137 --> 00:09:11,517
[Kody] The dumb thing
is there's been plenty
of complaints
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00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:14,724
from Janelle about Christine,
and Christine about Janelle.
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00:09:14,724 --> 00:09:17,862
There's been thousands
of complaints
between the two of them.
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00:09:17,862 --> 00:09:22,172
We didn't want to be
what I was pushing us to be
all that time.
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And now, now she's gone,
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00:09:25,275 --> 00:09:29,551
and we're lamenting it
when we really didn't
wanna be what... that.
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00:09:29,551 --> 00:09:31,551
I wanted to be it, Kody.
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00:09:31,551 --> 00:09:33,310
No, you're not gonna
say that to me.
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[Meri] I don't think it's fair
for you to say
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00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:40,586
what everybody thinks or feels
'cause that's not what
I wanted.
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00:09:40,586 --> 00:09:45,517
I wanna say something here
really, really, really, really
questioning him if I should.
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00:09:46,965 --> 00:09:48,413
[sighs]
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00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:50,758
It's about my situation
with him.
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00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:52,551
And I can't decide.
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[sighs]
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00:10:02,275 --> 00:10:03,482
But I'm just going to.
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[Meri] It's interesting
hearing him talking
about this,
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00:10:19,103 --> 00:10:23,034
and the parallels
that is happening
with him and Christine,
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00:10:23,758 --> 00:10:25,827
and me and him. It's...
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00:10:26,965 --> 00:10:29,275
...kind of disturbing
because, like,
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00:10:29,275 --> 00:10:31,793
some of the things
that he's frustrated about...
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00:10:33,206 --> 00:10:35,206
...with Christine,
he did to me.
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00:10:35,206 --> 00:10:38,000
Oh, he wants to work on it
with Christine.
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But...
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00:10:41,206 --> 00:10:42,344
...not me.
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00:10:42,344 --> 00:10:45,620
If people are just tired
of trying
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00:10:45,620 --> 00:10:47,931
and they don't wanna
work it out,
then I need to know.
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00:10:47,931 --> 00:10:51,344
Robyn, I think that you and I
have had enough conversations
about this
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00:10:51,344 --> 00:10:52,724
that you know
exactly where I am,
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00:10:52,724 --> 00:10:55,517
and that I am still here
because I'm still trying.
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Six years later,
I'm still here.
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00:10:57,034 --> 00:11:00,172
Ten years, 15, 20 years later,
I'm still here.
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00:11:00,172 --> 00:11:01,241
It's what I want.
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00:11:08,068 --> 00:11:09,413
"I'm here, Robyn.
234
00:11:09,413 --> 00:11:10,586
I'm here."
235
00:11:12,413 --> 00:11:14,862
And there's silence.
236
00:11:14,862 --> 00:11:19,620
[Robyn] I love that Meri
is saying that she wants
to work stuff out as a family.
237
00:11:19,620 --> 00:11:22,551
But I'm purposely
just not saying anything
238
00:11:22,551 --> 00:11:25,862
because I don't want it
to intimidate Kody
and Janelle
239
00:11:25,862 --> 00:11:28,068
and make them feel
like they have to conform,
240
00:11:28,068 --> 00:11:31,758
so that we can really
get to the bottom
of maybe some issues.
241
00:11:31,758 --> 00:11:33,620
[Kody] I'm exhausted.
242
00:11:33,620 --> 00:11:35,586
Like, who cares.
243
00:11:35,586 --> 00:11:38,241
If you're not with me,
you're against me. Eff off.
244
00:11:39,206 --> 00:11:41,965
You know,
I'm just like that way.
245
00:11:41,965 --> 00:11:44,206
Ironically, Meri's
trying to support me,
246
00:11:44,206 --> 00:11:46,931
and I don't wanna be
in a relationship
with her anymore.
247
00:11:49,482 --> 00:11:51,793
[Robyn] So, now...
248
00:11:51,793 --> 00:11:54,448
- ...I gotta hear from you.
- I do think, you, Kody,
you focus...
249
00:11:54,448 --> 00:11:56,793
Like, you're like,
"Oh, my God, we really
wanted to be together."
250
00:11:56,793 --> 00:11:59,827
And to be honest with you,
I really don't know
if I wanna do the work.
251
00:11:59,827 --> 00:12:02,758
Like, I'm basically,
it feels like I'm being
forced to choose
252
00:12:02,758 --> 00:12:06,068
between my children
and this group.
253
00:12:06,068 --> 00:12:07,896
I don't feel like my children
are welcome.
254
00:12:08,862 --> 00:12:11,103
When... When have they
not felt welcome?
255
00:12:11,103 --> 00:12:14,241
Well, Kody's, Kody's
basically told me
they can't come for Christmas
256
00:12:14,241 --> 00:12:16,000
unless they do a big apology.
257
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,620
And they're like,
"Well, hell no.
We're not gonna do that."
258
00:12:18,620 --> 00:12:22,172
The issues between me
and Gabriel and Garrison,
259
00:12:22,172 --> 00:12:25,482
basically have to do
with lack of, uh,
260
00:12:25,482 --> 00:12:29,448
support or adherence
to the COVID protocols,
and stuff like that.
261
00:12:29,448 --> 00:12:30,931
Janelle wasn't supporting me,
262
00:12:30,931 --> 00:12:32,965
therefore they weren't
supporting me.
263
00:12:32,965 --> 00:12:36,793
I'm not gonna have
Garrison and Gabriel around
like the alcoholic family
264
00:12:36,793 --> 00:12:38,827
- acting like nothing happened.
- You have to know
Garrison and Gabriel
265
00:12:38,827 --> 00:12:42,620
are not the only children
who have problems.
266
00:12:42,620 --> 00:12:45,379
You say there's more
than just Gabe and Garrison.
267
00:12:45,379 --> 00:12:49,068
There's a general
disgruntlement among my kids.
268
00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:51,620
I think this is an indicator
that Janelle and her children
269
00:12:51,620 --> 00:12:53,448
are talking about me
behind my back
270
00:12:53,448 --> 00:12:55,068
'cause nobody's confronting me
with it.
271
00:12:55,068 --> 00:12:57,827
- [Robyn] Then, why don't we
talk about this now?
- Yeah, why...
272
00:12:57,827 --> 00:12:59,241
Why don't I even know?
273
00:12:59,241 --> 00:13:00,931
[Robyn] Why can't we talk
about this stuff?
274
00:13:00,931 --> 00:13:03,172
You... You've hardly
been around, Kody.
275
00:13:03,172 --> 00:13:06,000
You're not seeing
all the input.
276
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:07,482
You're just sort of like,
"They should respect me."
277
00:13:07,482 --> 00:13:10,689
And there's a lot more pieces
to than just telling
them that.
278
00:13:10,689 --> 00:13:12,310
I really don't know
what's going on.
279
00:13:12,310 --> 00:13:13,551
I'm trying to catch up here.
280
00:13:13,551 --> 00:13:15,655
And I really wanna understand
281
00:13:15,655 --> 00:13:19,103
because I feel like this
is something we can get fixed.
282
00:13:19,103 --> 00:13:20,241
[Janelle] You know,
I have no idea.
283
00:13:20,241 --> 00:13:22,103
Robyn's acting like
she's never heard this before.
284
00:13:22,103 --> 00:13:25,137
I think she's pretending,
possibly, that she's never
heard this before
285
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,172
'cause Kody's a blabbermouth
and he can't keep
anything secret.
286
00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:31,206
This whole confused thing
is something that happens
a lot.
287
00:13:31,896 --> 00:13:33,172
And I don't know.
288
00:13:33,172 --> 00:13:34,586
I don't know if it's for real,
289
00:13:34,586 --> 00:13:38,068
or if she's just pretending
that she's never heard
anything before.
290
00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:40,241
But Kody leaks like a sieve,
so I don't...
291
00:13:40,827 --> 00:13:42,344
At the end of the day,
292
00:13:42,344 --> 00:13:44,103
I think I'd rather be
with my kids.
293
00:13:44,103 --> 00:13:47,862
- Well, that's what
Christine's decision was too.
- No, I'm just telling you.
294
00:13:47,862 --> 00:13:50,275
- Look, you're getting upset
with me now.
- No, I'm not.
295
00:13:50,275 --> 00:13:53,000
- [Robyn] You guys.
- I'm just saying
that's where Christine was.
296
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,482
There's been a bit
of a civil war,
297
00:13:54,482 --> 00:13:55,862
the whole family in a way.
298
00:13:55,862 --> 00:14:00,275
And I'm looking at Janelle
wondering whose side she's on.
299
00:14:00,275 --> 00:14:03,517
Are you saying Garrison
and Gabe can't be around,
300
00:14:03,517 --> 00:14:04,551
- period?
- [Kody] I want...
301
00:14:04,551 --> 00:14:07,758
Or are you looking for, like,
real resolution
302
00:14:07,758 --> 00:14:09,724
where there's conversation
on both sides?
303
00:14:11,827 --> 00:14:13,758
Well, I think we need
a resolution.
304
00:14:14,448 --> 00:14:16,172
Right.
305
00:14:16,172 --> 00:14:19,068
I'm just like, "What?
What the [bleep]?"
Sorry.
306
00:14:19,068 --> 00:14:21,068
I don't even recognize...
307
00:14:22,551 --> 00:14:25,241
...this family, or whatever.
Like, I...
308
00:14:27,172 --> 00:14:30,000
Like, I don't know.
Something has really changed
for me.
309
00:14:31,655 --> 00:14:33,068
I want us to work this out.
310
00:14:34,379 --> 00:14:37,275
There's a strong pull
to just run away
and do the easy thing.
311
00:14:38,344 --> 00:14:39,586
I don't want you to do that.
312
00:14:40,965 --> 00:14:42,379
'Cause I have two worlds
pulling now...
313
00:14:43,689 --> 00:14:45,551
- ...you know?
- There should be one.
314
00:14:47,034 --> 00:14:49,137
There should be one world.
315
00:14:49,137 --> 00:14:51,862
Robyn's the only
good communicator
in this whole family.
316
00:14:51,862 --> 00:14:53,448
I'm a [bleep] communicator.
317
00:14:53,448 --> 00:14:55,379
There's a term
they use for Robyn,
318
00:14:55,379 --> 00:14:57,448
it's called
"circling the donkey."
319
00:14:57,448 --> 00:15:00,517
It's where the donkey
is roped to the grinder
and it's grinding the mill,
320
00:15:00,517 --> 00:15:03,448
and that donkey just goes
around and around
and around and around.
321
00:15:03,448 --> 00:15:05,482
'Cause Robyn gets
to the bottom of the problem.
322
00:15:05,482 --> 00:15:08,034
It's an unfair term for her,
323
00:15:08,034 --> 00:15:10,137
but the fact is
is it's a compliment.
324
00:15:12,689 --> 00:15:14,551
It's hard to be a wife...
325
00:15:15,862 --> 00:15:17,689
...when your husband
has a wife.
326
00:15:17,689 --> 00:15:18,862
We need him.
327
00:15:18,862 --> 00:15:22,000
And most men in monogamy,
they just...
328
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,689
they go do stupid stuff,
329
00:15:23,689 --> 00:15:26,103
and they date whoever,
and they're angry,
330
00:15:26,103 --> 00:15:28,827
and they're pissed,
and women suck.
331
00:15:30,931 --> 00:15:32,931
He's doing with that
while he's married.
332
00:15:34,896 --> 00:15:37,103
And I've told him several
times I feel like
333
00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:39,655
he's lining up all women
and I'm there too,
334
00:15:39,655 --> 00:15:41,724
and you're there,
and you're there,
335
00:15:41,724 --> 00:15:43,482
and he's shooting us all down
336
00:15:43,482 --> 00:15:47,896
because Christine is a woman
and he's angry and he's hurt.
337
00:15:47,896 --> 00:15:50,482
I think women bear
a very different burden
338
00:15:50,482 --> 00:15:52,551
in plural marriage
than men do.
339
00:15:52,551 --> 00:15:55,103
And I've seen men
leave plural marriage,
340
00:15:55,103 --> 00:15:58,137
feeling like, you know,
five, six wives?
341
00:15:58,137 --> 00:15:59,793
Never feeling like
they'd been loved.
342
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,758
Plural marriage isn't
all beer and skittles.
343
00:16:06,862 --> 00:16:10,931
You know, it's not for men.
344
00:16:10,931 --> 00:16:14,241
I mean, there's
a different burden
345
00:16:14,241 --> 00:16:17,000
that I don't want to sit
here and mansplain to you.
346
00:16:18,655 --> 00:16:20,310
It's just obvious
that it's difficult.
347
00:16:20,310 --> 00:16:21,689
You're going to share
your husband?
348
00:16:21,689 --> 00:16:22,931
Why would you do that?
349
00:16:23,586 --> 00:16:25,827
I'd just say to each of you
350
00:16:26,965 --> 00:16:28,965
that I want to get
this figured out.
351
00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:34,275
All right, well, I gotta
go get Savanah.
352
00:16:38,344 --> 00:16:40,275
- [Meri] I'd like to see your
house plans some time.
- I guess you can your plans
353
00:16:40,275 --> 00:16:41,620
- another time.
- [all chuckle]
354
00:16:41,620 --> 00:16:43,793
I'll show you really fast.
Savanah can wait
just a few minutes.
355
00:16:43,793 --> 00:16:45,482
I told her I was gonna be
a little late, but...
356
00:16:46,551 --> 00:16:49,310
- Oh, boy, okay.
- That's a lot of paper.
357
00:16:49,310 --> 00:16:52,517
[Kody] We're going down a road
where we were really on
358
00:16:52,517 --> 00:16:55,551
the verge of a critical conversation.
359
00:16:55,551 --> 00:16:56,689
[Janelle] So that's
what it looks like.
360
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,000
So there's garage,
361
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:00,517
and then we're gonna
put decks.
362
00:17:00,517 --> 00:17:03,310
So, here's the... Go ahead
and stand over here, Meri,
so you can see it.
363
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:05,068
And now we're
looking at plans,
364
00:17:05,068 --> 00:17:08,413
and like getting all happy
and everything like that.
365
00:17:08,413 --> 00:17:11,620
I think that was a mistake,
we should've finished
the crucial conversation.
366
00:17:11,620 --> 00:17:14,655
[Janelle] So the bathroom's
got like a hall entry,
this will be her bedroom.
367
00:17:15,655 --> 00:17:16,827
We're just going to ignore it.
368
00:17:18,724 --> 00:17:20,344
'Cause that's just what's
gonna happen.
369
00:17:24,379 --> 00:17:25,620
Do you want to give me a hug?
370
00:17:25,620 --> 00:17:27,827
You gonna sit there
and look at me.
371
00:17:27,827 --> 00:17:31,310
This is the first time
I've seen Dad since
he had COVID.
372
00:17:31,310 --> 00:17:33,793
It doesn't really make
that much of a difference.
373
00:17:33,793 --> 00:17:36,482
When he comes over,
it's more like just a visit,
374
00:17:36,482 --> 00:17:39,068
instead of like
living there, you know.
375
00:17:39,068 --> 00:17:41,379
And I made tater tots,
but they're inside,
I'll go grab them.
376
00:17:41,379 --> 00:17:43,551
I told everybody in Flagstaff
377
00:17:43,551 --> 00:17:45,379
that I would be coming back.
378
00:17:45,379 --> 00:17:48,137
And I didn't know
how hard that would be.
379
00:18:00,793 --> 00:18:03,689
Before I got COVID,
Janelle decided that she
wanted to get an apartment.
380
00:18:05,655 --> 00:18:08,206
We decided that the RV wasn't
going to be functional enough,
381
00:18:08,206 --> 00:18:10,620
and then she moved while
I had COVID, I think.
382
00:18:10,620 --> 00:18:13,793
Well, I'm going over
to her place to check out
her new apartment
383
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:14,758
for the first time.
384
00:18:17,172 --> 00:18:19,103
[Janelle] It's a very
small apartment for us.
385
00:18:19,103 --> 00:18:21,655
We've moved in and now
I'm trying to figure out
how to make everything fit.
386
00:18:21,655 --> 00:18:23,482
It is more room than the RV.
387
00:18:23,482 --> 00:18:25,068
So it's really chaotic.
388
00:18:26,034 --> 00:18:27,000
[knocking on door]
389
00:18:28,413 --> 00:18:29,344
[Kody] Hi.
390
00:18:29,344 --> 00:18:30,482
- [Janelle] Hi, honey.
- Holy cow.
391
00:18:30,482 --> 00:18:32,310
- Sorry, it's--
- [Kody] It's like moving,
isn't it?
392
00:18:32,310 --> 00:18:34,000
- Yeah, it's pretty chaotic.
- [Kody] Jeez.
393
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,275
How are you?
394
00:18:36,275 --> 00:18:37,965
- Good.
- Do you want to give me a hug?
395
00:18:37,965 --> 00:18:39,517
- You gonna sit there
and look at me.
- [Janelle chuckles]
396
00:18:40,793 --> 00:18:43,482
So this is the first time
I've seen Dad
397
00:18:43,482 --> 00:18:44,862
since he had COVID.
398
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:48,068
Uh, it doesn't really make
that much of a difference
399
00:18:48,068 --> 00:18:50,586
because he,
400
00:18:50,586 --> 00:18:53,724
he doesn't come over, um,
very, very often.
401
00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:55,793
When he comes over,
402
00:18:55,793 --> 00:18:58,965
it's more like
he is just a visit,
403
00:18:58,965 --> 00:19:01,482
instead of like being there,
404
00:19:01,482 --> 00:19:02,931
living there, you know?
405
00:19:04,172 --> 00:19:05,103
So...
406
00:19:06,172 --> 00:19:07,896
Oh, I'd love to bring
that freezer
407
00:19:07,896 --> 00:19:09,413
and set it right
where that chair is.
408
00:19:09,413 --> 00:19:12,103
- If there's a way to...
- [Janelle] If we got
a smaller table.
409
00:19:12,103 --> 00:19:15,793
But, you know, once it's all
cleared up, one side
can be my office.
410
00:19:15,793 --> 00:19:19,172
My desk, my computer,
because I don't really have
an office space.
411
00:19:19,172 --> 00:19:20,689
With the way that
our family works,
412
00:19:20,689 --> 00:19:22,344
it's always kind of
been that way.
413
00:19:23,965 --> 00:19:25,896
It's getting less
and less frequent.
414
00:19:25,896 --> 00:19:27,965
I think that's fair
in a lot of ways.
415
00:19:27,965 --> 00:19:29,758
Dad didn't like the trailer.
416
00:19:29,758 --> 00:19:32,827
So I think it was really
hard for him to be over there.
417
00:19:32,827 --> 00:19:35,344
When Janelle was in the RV,
I was splitting my nights
418
00:19:35,344 --> 00:19:38,551
between Janelle's RV
and Robyn's place.
419
00:19:38,551 --> 00:19:40,931
But I wasn't spending
the daytimes at Janelle's,
420
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:42,551
or showering there.
421
00:19:42,551 --> 00:19:45,344
There wasn't enough water,
there wasn't enough space
really for me.
422
00:19:46,965 --> 00:19:50,068
[Savanah] But hopefully now
that we are moved into
423
00:19:50,068 --> 00:19:51,344
an easier place to live,
424
00:19:51,344 --> 00:19:53,068
a better place to live
in my opinion,
425
00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:55,862
that, um, he'll start coming
over a lot more often.
426
00:19:58,034 --> 00:19:59,448
[Kody] Um.
427
00:19:59,448 --> 00:20:01,827
Oh, yeah, this space
just isn't big enough.
428
00:20:03,551 --> 00:20:04,379
Right here.
429
00:20:05,517 --> 00:20:06,620
I'm an afterthought.
430
00:20:06,620 --> 00:20:09,241
Like, I'll squeeze in
wherever I'm gonna be.
431
00:20:09,241 --> 00:20:12,827
But she's filled this
house up and she
has no more room in it,
432
00:20:12,827 --> 00:20:14,896
and she doesn't have
everything in it yet.
433
00:20:14,896 --> 00:20:16,586
And she doesn't have me
in it yet.
434
00:20:16,586 --> 00:20:19,793
[sighs] Okay, for me,
the lamps are too low
for my reading
435
00:20:19,793 --> 00:20:20,896
when they're on a nightstand.
436
00:20:20,896 --> 00:20:22,793
I need a higher nightstand
for a lamp.
437
00:20:22,793 --> 00:20:25,000
- I wanna--
- [Janelle] Do you wanna just
bring it over then?
438
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,896
Yeah, I would be tempted
to bring it over,
439
00:20:26,896 --> 00:20:28,758
- but--
- [Janelle] You have
a plug right there.
440
00:20:29,413 --> 00:20:30,379
Anyway, we'll figure it out
441
00:20:30,379 --> 00:20:32,000
'cause this is about all
the bedroom furniture
442
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:33,758
- we're gonna get in here.
- [Kody] Really?
443
00:20:33,758 --> 00:20:37,137
I was really afraid that Kody
would judge this apartment
444
00:20:37,137 --> 00:20:39,103
because he really likes
nice things,
445
00:20:39,103 --> 00:20:41,620
and this apartment
is the standard
446
00:20:42,413 --> 00:20:44,344
college town apartment.
447
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:46,137
I knew it wouldn't meet his...
448
00:20:46,137 --> 00:20:49,344
His preferred standards
for living.
449
00:20:50,068 --> 00:20:52,724
Yeah, so weird, so small.
450
00:20:52,724 --> 00:20:55,172
- It's kinda fun, I feel like
we're sort of like starting...
- [Kody] Yeah.
451
00:20:55,172 --> 00:20:58,000
- ...as a... [laughs]
- A newlywed couple?
452
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,206
We're here,
and it was available,
and she took it.
453
00:21:01,206 --> 00:21:03,931
And so we're gonna
squeeze ourselves into it.
454
00:21:03,931 --> 00:21:05,758
[Janelle] Should we go get
something to eat?
455
00:21:05,758 --> 00:21:09,000
- I'm starving too,
I should eat something.
- Let's go.
456
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:09,689
Should we go?
457
00:21:10,793 --> 00:21:13,724
Yeah, I finally am not
worried about getting COVID.
458
00:21:13,724 --> 00:21:15,620
You'll go to a restaurant,
and wear your mask,
459
00:21:15,620 --> 00:21:17,448
and then we just see you
sit at a real table,
460
00:21:17,448 --> 00:21:19,413
- and eat there?
- Yeah, makes sure
I got a mask.
461
00:21:19,413 --> 00:21:21,413
All right, let's go.
That'll be fun.
462
00:21:24,793 --> 00:21:26,620
[Christine] Oh, I heard you
saw that [imitates engine].
463
00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:27,517
[woman] Okay.
464
00:21:28,413 --> 00:21:29,689
[Christine] Oh,
we can move this.
465
00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:31,896
- [woman] You know,
I just can't.
- [Christine] Oh, no bueno?
466
00:21:31,896 --> 00:21:33,241
[woman] It's okay.
Do you want...
467
00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:35,586
I've been living in Salt Lake
for like two and a half months
468
00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:39,000
and oh, my gosh,
I feel like I'm back home.
469
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,034
Like I wanted to hang out
with Aspyn, and Mitch,
470
00:21:41,034 --> 00:21:42,931
and Mykelti, and Tony,
and my mom,
471
00:21:42,931 --> 00:21:44,482
and my dad,
and my sisters.
472
00:21:44,482 --> 00:21:47,137
It's all happened,
several times.
473
00:21:47,137 --> 00:21:48,965
So how do you like
living here, Christine?
474
00:21:48,965 --> 00:21:50,758
- Oh, my gosh, I love it.
- Yeah?
475
00:21:50,758 --> 00:21:52,103
Yes, I love it.
476
00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:54,344
I was hoping that we would
see you guys all the time,
477
00:21:54,344 --> 00:21:56,413
and hopefully see Mykelti
and Tony all the time.
478
00:21:56,413 --> 00:21:58,551
And we really have.
I love it.
479
00:21:58,551 --> 00:22:00,551
I told everybody in Flagstaff
480
00:22:00,551 --> 00:22:02,655
that I would be coming back
481
00:22:02,655 --> 00:22:04,827
to hang out and to visit
and everything.
482
00:22:06,896 --> 00:22:09,689
And I didn't know
how hard that would be.
483
00:22:11,827 --> 00:22:14,000
Every time I drive
to Flagstaff,
484
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,586
I go around this corner
and up this hill,
485
00:22:17,275 --> 00:22:19,000
and there the mountain is.
486
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,862
The same mountains
that angels sang to me before.
487
00:22:21,862 --> 00:22:24,034
Yeah, mmm-hmm,
those mountains.
488
00:22:24,034 --> 00:22:27,896
[Kody] I want everybody
to see the view.
489
00:22:27,896 --> 00:22:30,000
- The magical view.
- [Christine vocalizing]
490
00:22:30,827 --> 00:22:33,000
That's the angels,
right there.
491
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,448
I just feel like it's just
this huge weight.
492
00:22:36,413 --> 00:22:37,965
I have to go back
493
00:22:37,965 --> 00:22:43,103
to a place where
there's so much heartache.
494
00:22:43,103 --> 00:22:45,413
I made tater tots,
but they're inside,
I'll go grab them.
495
00:22:45,413 --> 00:22:48,034
A week before
I left Flagstaff,
496
00:22:48,034 --> 00:22:51,275
I told Kody, and Robyn,
and Meri, and Janelle,
497
00:22:51,275 --> 00:22:55,172
that I was moving
and it was in a week.
498
00:22:55,172 --> 00:22:59,517
You never tried to have
really good relationships
with these other people!
499
00:22:59,517 --> 00:23:02,758
You wanted to renegotiate
a relationship with me.
500
00:23:02,758 --> 00:23:05,620
But you wouldn't even
have a decent one with them.
501
00:23:05,620 --> 00:23:07,689
I knew I was giving them
a lot of information,
502
00:23:07,689 --> 00:23:09,896
but I didn't know
how bad it would go.
503
00:23:09,896 --> 00:23:12,172
Are you interested
in some sort of a...
504
00:23:14,206 --> 00:23:15,758
Like trying to work stuff out?
505
00:23:15,758 --> 00:23:18,172
I think for right now,
I need space.
506
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:19,931
For right now.
507
00:23:20,827 --> 00:23:22,482
The hardest part
of the whole conversation
508
00:23:22,482 --> 00:23:26,000
was when Robyn said,
"Well, what about us?
509
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,000
What about those
that you don't have
a good relationship with?
510
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:31,551
Would you want to fix that?"
511
00:23:31,551 --> 00:23:34,620
And immediately, I was like,
"Oh, my gosh.
512
00:23:34,620 --> 00:23:37,413
No, I can't go back
in the past."
513
00:23:44,034 --> 00:23:46,344
And then I saw her kids
a couple days after,
514
00:23:46,344 --> 00:23:47,965
it was so weird and awkward,
515
00:23:47,965 --> 00:23:51,379
and I realized, her kids
think I don't want
a relationship with them.
516
00:23:52,655 --> 00:23:54,413
And now I think I understand.
517
00:23:54,413 --> 00:23:55,551
If that's how she feels,
518
00:23:55,551 --> 00:23:57,172
and that's what
she heard I said,
519
00:23:57,896 --> 00:23:59,448
no wonder it's so hard.
520
00:23:59,448 --> 00:24:00,965
No wonder
everything's so weird.
521
00:24:02,379 --> 00:24:04,827
I feel like there's
this huge chasm
522
00:24:04,827 --> 00:24:07,379
in between Robyn's
kids and me.
523
00:24:07,379 --> 00:24:09,689
In order to cross it,
524
00:24:09,689 --> 00:24:11,275
I have to build
a bridge with Robyn.
525
00:24:12,172 --> 00:24:13,482
I don't know what to do.
526
00:24:14,103 --> 00:24:15,103
I don't know what to do.
527
00:24:20,655 --> 00:24:22,068
I'm sorry I'm angry.
528
00:24:22,068 --> 00:24:24,896
- I just survived a really,
really dark place.
- I understand that.
529
00:24:24,896 --> 00:24:26,310
You don't give
a [bleep] though.
530
00:24:26,310 --> 00:24:27,344
Look at you.
531
00:24:27,344 --> 00:24:28,379
Dismissing it.
532
00:24:28,379 --> 00:24:29,655
- Okay.
- [Kody] Would you ever have
533
00:24:29,655 --> 00:24:31,275
- any empathy for me?
- [Robyn] Janelle,
please don't leave.
534
00:24:31,275 --> 00:24:33,206
- Can we just keep talking?
- [Kody] When you're in pain,
I try to understand you.
535
00:24:33,206 --> 00:24:35,689
[Robyn] Kody, can we please
keep talking, Janelle, please?
536
00:24:35,689 --> 00:24:39,344
Janelle, this is a really
bad idea for you to walk
off on this one.
537
00:24:50,793 --> 00:24:51,931
Hey, ladies, how's it going?
538
00:24:51,931 --> 00:24:53,000
Good, how are you?
539
00:24:53,586 --> 00:24:54,655
I'm living.
540
00:24:54,655 --> 00:24:56,379
So since Christine has left,
541
00:24:56,379 --> 00:24:59,551
and, you know, obviously
she said that she wasn't
going to be here
542
00:24:59,551 --> 00:25:01,344
for the holidays this year.
543
00:25:01,344 --> 00:25:05,517
I think we're just like trying
to like figure out what
to do with the holidays
544
00:25:05,517 --> 00:25:08,103
'cause it's kind of been
a discussion.
545
00:25:08,103 --> 00:25:10,517
Well, I mean, okay, so
Thanksgiving's a week
from today.
546
00:25:11,827 --> 00:25:13,689
And I am actually going
to North Carolina.
547
00:25:16,965 --> 00:25:19,793
- So you're going to go
to Thanksgiving at Maddie's?
- [Janelle] Yeah.
548
00:25:20,931 --> 00:25:23,482
- Yeah.
- [Meri] What are you doing
for Christmas?
549
00:25:23,482 --> 00:25:25,206
- [Janelle] I'm here.
- Are you?
550
00:25:25,206 --> 00:25:26,620
- [Janelle] Yeah.
- What about your kids?
551
00:25:26,620 --> 00:25:28,068
- Who of your kids are coming?
- Where are you going
for Christmas?
552
00:25:28,068 --> 00:25:29,413
Here, here.
553
00:25:29,413 --> 00:25:32,620
- Okay.
- But my kids,
they're renting an Airbnb
554
00:25:32,620 --> 00:25:33,517
because...
555
00:25:34,172 --> 00:25:35,620
I didn't, they don't...
556
00:25:35,620 --> 00:25:36,758
I don't think they're...
557
00:25:38,379 --> 00:25:39,413
welcome, right?
558
00:25:42,034 --> 00:25:43,793
[Kody] I never said my kids
weren't welcome.
559
00:25:43,793 --> 00:25:46,758
- If they apologize,
and they're kinda like--
- No, no, no.
560
00:25:46,758 --> 00:25:50,241
I completely reversed that,
I said all we gotta do is be
able to have conversations
561
00:25:50,241 --> 00:25:51,965
so we're not sitting here
in our house
562
00:25:51,965 --> 00:25:55,448
like a bunch of alcoholics
that had a fight last night
and forgot it happened.
563
00:25:55,448 --> 00:25:56,758
Well, I don't know.
564
00:25:56,758 --> 00:25:59,034
- [Kody] I'm serious.
- Your boys are as stubborn
as you are.
565
00:25:59,034 --> 00:26:01,137
- So...
- No, I'm not being
stubborn here.
566
00:26:01,137 --> 00:26:02,586
All I want to do
is talk to them.
567
00:26:03,620 --> 00:26:06,551
So, they're getting a 'bnb?
568
00:26:06,551 --> 00:26:08,896
Yeah, 'cause everybody's
coming this year.
569
00:26:08,896 --> 00:26:12,034
- Everybody is?
- Yeah, not Maddie and Kayla,
but everybody else is.
570
00:26:12,034 --> 00:26:13,896
- Everybody is coming?
- Yeah.
571
00:26:15,275 --> 00:26:17,620
Yeah, this is absolutely news
to me that everybody's coming.
572
00:26:17,620 --> 00:26:20,758
This is just like Janelle
to sort of keep me in
the dark about the plans.
573
00:26:21,965 --> 00:26:24,310
- So--
- And I'm just
finding this out?
574
00:26:24,310 --> 00:26:26,206
Kody, you're the one
who said they can't come
575
00:26:26,206 --> 00:26:28,068
- until they apologize.
- I didn't say!
576
00:26:28,068 --> 00:26:29,896
- You said, last time
we talked you said...
- No, no.
577
00:26:29,896 --> 00:26:31,172
- ...they can't come
'til the apologize.
- Listen.
578
00:26:31,172 --> 00:26:32,862
You and I need
to communicate some more
579
00:26:32,862 --> 00:26:34,448
-'cause I...
- That's what you said.
580
00:26:34,448 --> 00:26:35,793
You said that to me
multiple times.
581
00:26:35,793 --> 00:26:37,689
They need to apologize.
582
00:26:37,689 --> 00:26:39,482
They need to show
some respect.
583
00:26:39,482 --> 00:26:43,000
I think sometimes
that Janelle has pit me
584
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:44,034
against the boys,
585
00:26:44,034 --> 00:26:46,413
or never supported me
with the boys.
586
00:26:46,413 --> 00:26:48,827
I'm... Man, I'm having
the hardest time
587
00:26:48,827 --> 00:26:51,241
not just feeling like
she's just betraying me.
588
00:26:51,241 --> 00:26:54,172
I'm not saying that
they actually have
to apologize to me,
589
00:26:54,172 --> 00:26:57,551
and I corrected that
many times already.
590
00:26:57,551 --> 00:26:59,103
And she keeps
hitting that note.
591
00:27:00,517 --> 00:27:03,137
It's almost like that's
what she's told them,
592
00:27:03,137 --> 00:27:05,000
so she can't back
off on it,
593
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,862
because they're trying
to put the heat onto me
594
00:27:07,862 --> 00:27:09,896
for what's been going
on here.
595
00:27:09,896 --> 00:27:12,206
But you told them all
until they apologize
596
00:27:12,206 --> 00:27:13,931
- they can't--
- [Janelle] Well, that's
what you told me.
597
00:27:13,931 --> 00:27:15,448
That's what you told me.
598
00:27:15,448 --> 00:27:17,620
You said until they show
respect and apologize...
599
00:27:18,413 --> 00:27:19,068
Then...
600
00:27:22,241 --> 00:27:22,931
So...
601
00:27:24,551 --> 00:27:27,000
And then after Christmas,
602
00:27:27,931 --> 00:27:30,551
Christine said that Ysabel
603
00:27:30,551 --> 00:27:34,241
and everybody are coming
home and they want to come
see the family here.
604
00:27:34,241 --> 00:27:37,896
Man, this is exactly
what I was afraid of
with Christine leaving.
605
00:27:37,896 --> 00:27:40,862
[Janelle] Kody, it just
was working out that
we had a vacation rental
606
00:27:40,862 --> 00:27:43,310
so we extended it
so Christine and her kids
607
00:27:43,310 --> 00:27:46,000
could come so they can
see, Truely and Ysabel
can see you.
608
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:47,379
[Kody sighs]
609
00:27:47,379 --> 00:27:50,068
Okay, am I the only
one that sees this
as some kind of betrayal?
610
00:27:53,965 --> 00:27:55,000
[Janelle] A betrayal?
611
00:27:56,965 --> 00:27:59,206
Christine just left.
612
00:27:59,206 --> 00:28:01,275
You don't want her
to bring the kids to see you?
613
00:28:02,379 --> 00:28:04,275
Oh, I'd like to see the kids.
614
00:28:04,275 --> 00:28:08,034
but you're talking about
everybody going to some
neutral zone?
615
00:28:08,034 --> 00:28:09,551
This is my house.
616
00:28:09,551 --> 00:28:10,758
They last I knew
617
00:28:10,758 --> 00:28:13,931
is that the boys couldn't come
until they showed respect
618
00:28:13,931 --> 00:28:15,379
and apologized.
619
00:28:15,379 --> 00:28:18,793
So they're like, "Well,
I'll guess we'll come and...
620
00:28:18,793 --> 00:28:21,103
stay with you," and I don't
have room for them.
621
00:28:22,379 --> 00:28:23,034
[Kody sighs]
622
00:28:24,586 --> 00:28:26,068
You guys are gonna
have to weigh in on this.
623
00:28:26,068 --> 00:28:28,758
I'm not going to shoulder
this whole damn thing.
624
00:28:28,758 --> 00:28:31,862
So now he's looking
for reinforcement
from Robyn and Meri.
625
00:28:31,862 --> 00:28:35,103
Let's build a united front
against Janelle
and her decisions.
626
00:28:36,344 --> 00:28:39,551
[Kody] I'm struggling here
with the Christmas scenario.
627
00:28:39,551 --> 00:28:43,034
So I'm asking Meri
and Robyn to chime in.
628
00:28:43,034 --> 00:28:47,482
Like, I can't identify what
it is specifically about
it bothering me.
629
00:28:47,482 --> 00:28:49,068
So I was like, "Is this
bothering you guys?"
630
00:28:50,551 --> 00:28:52,551
What do you want us
to comment on?
631
00:28:53,482 --> 00:28:55,275
I mean, have an opinion here.
632
00:28:55,275 --> 00:28:57,172
This is bugging the hell
out of me.
633
00:28:57,172 --> 00:28:58,068
Am I wrong?
634
00:28:59,482 --> 00:29:01,000
What was I supposed
to do, Kody?
635
00:29:01,827 --> 00:29:03,379
What were they supposed to do?
636
00:29:03,379 --> 00:29:07,310
Oh, man, I don't know why
every time we start talking
about family stuff,
637
00:29:07,310 --> 00:29:09,103
something broadsides me,
638
00:29:09,103 --> 00:29:12,448
- and--
- Kody, you said they
could not come over
639
00:29:12,448 --> 00:29:15,379
- until they apologized.
- I think we this conversation
a little bit
640
00:29:15,379 --> 00:29:17,586
and I thought that it was
a little bit more clear
641
00:29:17,586 --> 00:29:20,310
when we were at my house
a couple of weeks ago.
642
00:29:20,310 --> 00:29:23,379
I thought that he had made
it clear that it wasn't
643
00:29:23,379 --> 00:29:25,724
"well, you just have
to apologize and then
we're good."
644
00:29:25,724 --> 00:29:27,103
I thought he had
made it clear then.
645
00:29:28,034 --> 00:29:31,379
So after Kody recovered
from COVID,
646
00:29:31,379 --> 00:29:34,448
he told me that the boys
would have to apologize
to Robyn.
647
00:29:34,448 --> 00:29:37,137
But you know what?
There's been no movement
on Kody's side.
648
00:29:37,137 --> 00:29:40,034
And I'm not going to leave
my kids here in Flagstaff
649
00:29:40,034 --> 00:29:42,137
having a separate Christmas
when I'm at Robyn's
650
00:29:42,137 --> 00:29:44,379
with her and her kids
and Kody and Meri.
651
00:29:44,379 --> 00:29:48,172
Sorry, not interested,
I'd rather be with my boys.
652
00:29:48,172 --> 00:29:52,758
You know, if I was in the same
situation as Janelle is in,
653
00:29:52,758 --> 00:29:55,724
and all of my kids
were gonna be in town,
654
00:29:55,724 --> 00:29:58,206
I for sure would want
to go be with them.
655
00:29:58,206 --> 00:30:01,862
I absolutely remember
saying that, I think you
just didn't hear it.
656
00:30:01,862 --> 00:30:04,586
I corrected that, I said
that's not a good idea.
657
00:30:04,586 --> 00:30:06,103
- Well.
- What I need to do
is just...
658
00:30:06,103 --> 00:30:07,862
- We just need to--
- We had a previous earlier
659
00:30:07,862 --> 00:30:11,379
at least one or two
conversations where you
told me the same thing.
660
00:30:11,379 --> 00:30:13,827
So, that was the information
that I was working with.
661
00:30:16,413 --> 00:30:19,517
- And this is the year--
- Please do not communicate
to my children for me
662
00:30:19,517 --> 00:30:21,724
because you and I struggle
enough to communicate.
663
00:30:21,724 --> 00:30:23,689
- I'm afraid that message
will get mixed.
- What was I supposed to say?
664
00:30:24,103 --> 00:30:25,000
"Call Dad!"
665
00:30:25,931 --> 00:30:28,241
[scoffs] There's gonna
be no conversation.
666
00:30:28,241 --> 00:30:30,965
Kody still wants to hear
the same thing from them.
667
00:30:30,965 --> 00:30:34,068
At the end of the day,
Kody still wants them
to show respect,
668
00:30:34,068 --> 00:30:36,586
and apologize especially
to this person
669
00:30:36,586 --> 00:30:40,000
in this family who's done
all these amazing emotional
things for us
670
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,793
and has just been hurt,
AKA Robyn.
671
00:30:42,793 --> 00:30:44,482
So they're doing
Christmas over there now?
672
00:30:44,482 --> 00:30:45,724
I don't know what
we're doing.
673
00:30:45,724 --> 00:30:48,931
I'm hoping that by some
God given miracle
674
00:30:48,931 --> 00:30:51,172
that you guys figure
your stuff out.
675
00:30:51,172 --> 00:30:53,586
But at this point,
yeah, I guess.
676
00:30:53,586 --> 00:30:56,310
If you were like Logan
and Hunter, I made them
hold hands
677
00:30:56,310 --> 00:30:58,551
and like walk around all day.
678
00:30:58,551 --> 00:31:00,034
I mean, it totally
worked their crap out.
679
00:31:00,034 --> 00:31:03,344
See now, you're acting like
you're not even culpable
in this situation.
680
00:31:03,344 --> 00:31:05,413
Culpable? For what?
What?
681
00:31:08,724 --> 00:31:09,586
Culpable...
682
00:31:11,068 --> 00:31:14,068
for not having
any respect for me
about COVID rules.
683
00:31:14,068 --> 00:31:17,586
Kody, you were asking
me to choose between
my children and you.
684
00:31:17,586 --> 00:31:19,379
[Kody] But you ever even
reinforced the rules.
685
00:31:19,379 --> 00:31:21,448
You never even said
these are the things
you should do.
686
00:31:21,448 --> 00:31:22,689
You actually belittled...
687
00:31:23,827 --> 00:31:25,482
the stuff I was doing.
688
00:31:25,482 --> 00:31:27,241
- I was keeping myself
from being a hypocrite.
- [Janelle] Kody.
689
00:31:27,241 --> 00:31:29,793
You did not even give us
the rules 'til two weeks
before Thanksgiving.
690
00:31:29,793 --> 00:31:32,413
[Kody] We've been talking
about that for so long before.
691
00:31:32,413 --> 00:31:34,965
You did not give me
those rules 'til two
weeks before Thanksgiving.
692
00:31:34,965 --> 00:31:36,862
- [Kody] Well--
- So from March
until Thanksgiving,
693
00:31:36,862 --> 00:31:37,931
I had no rules.
694
00:31:37,931 --> 00:31:40,586
- Those were get--
- No, you didn't!
You did too!
695
00:31:40,586 --> 00:31:41,931
That's not true.
696
00:31:42,724 --> 00:31:44,275
- Okay.
- That's a blatant lie.
697
00:31:44,275 --> 00:31:45,689
Wait, wait, wait,
stop, stop, stop.
698
00:31:45,689 --> 00:31:47,896
- Just give us--
- [Kody] Sorry,
I'm mad as hell
699
00:31:47,896 --> 00:31:48,724
because you know what?
700
00:31:48,724 --> 00:31:51,103
Everybody put
the [bleep] on me.
701
00:31:51,103 --> 00:31:54,413
- [Robyn] No.
- And then when I finally
get sick from COVID,
702
00:31:54,413 --> 00:31:57,000
[grumbles] that was
a death-like experience.
703
00:31:58,172 --> 00:32:00,413
- [Robyn] Okay--
- Oh, man!
704
00:32:00,413 --> 00:32:02,896
I sat here and just tried
to get everybody to do...
705
00:32:02,896 --> 00:32:06,724
I realized that you just
can't run from it by now.
706
00:32:06,724 --> 00:32:09,068
Plus I was trying to protect,
to protect my family.
707
00:32:09,068 --> 00:32:12,137
What if one of my little
ones had been where
I was and where she was?
708
00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:14,137
Only what, what was it?
709
00:32:14,137 --> 00:32:15,862
- Like three weeks ago?
- Okay, this is same old,
same old.
710
00:32:15,862 --> 00:32:18,344
[exclaims] I cannot believe!
711
00:32:18,344 --> 00:32:21,827
I cannot believe that
I have done all this.
712
00:32:23,310 --> 00:32:24,724
To save you!
713
00:32:24,724 --> 00:32:26,034
To save Truely!
714
00:32:26,034 --> 00:32:28,931
To save our... I did not know!
715
00:32:28,931 --> 00:32:31,896
I did not know that it
wouldn't harm them!
716
00:32:31,896 --> 00:32:35,448
I was trying to protect 'em
and I got criticism from you!
717
00:32:35,448 --> 00:32:37,344
And from the my boys,
the worst criticism!
718
00:32:37,344 --> 00:32:39,000
Zero respect!
719
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,758
You guys wonder why I'm mad?
720
00:32:41,931 --> 00:32:44,689
I've gone 18 months
being persecuted
721
00:32:44,689 --> 00:32:47,586
by my own family
for trying to protect them.
722
00:32:47,586 --> 00:32:49,413
- [Robyn] Let's not--
- My heart is broken!
723
00:32:49,413 --> 00:32:52,758
- Let's just talk--
- Christine left
because of this!
724
00:32:52,758 --> 00:32:55,482
Let's just keep talking,
even if it's intense.
725
00:32:55,482 --> 00:32:57,689
[Kody] I'm, I'm sorry...
726
00:32:57,689 --> 00:33:00,965
- I just went through this--
- You and I see it very
differently, Kody.
727
00:33:00,965 --> 00:33:02,482
And it's not all my fault.
728
00:33:02,482 --> 00:33:05,413
- This is not my fault.
- Janelle, you have
flu-like symptoms, I...
729
00:33:05,413 --> 00:33:08,758
- I had--
- You're acting like
this is my fault.
730
00:33:08,758 --> 00:33:11,448
It would've been great
to have had a back-up.
731
00:33:11,448 --> 00:33:12,862
Kody, I was doing
what I could.
732
00:33:12,862 --> 00:33:15,241
I was walking a line
between my adult children
733
00:33:15,241 --> 00:33:17,413
and you, and everybody else.
734
00:33:17,413 --> 00:33:20,310
I was following all
the CDC guidelines.
735
00:33:20,310 --> 00:33:22,517
Kody's acting like
I was a COVID denier.
736
00:33:22,517 --> 00:33:24,137
I was not a COVID denier.
737
00:33:24,137 --> 00:33:26,034
I followed all the CDC rules.
738
00:33:26,034 --> 00:33:28,827
I wore a mask.
I washed my hands.
I was careful.
739
00:33:28,827 --> 00:33:30,965
I'm vaccinated,
for crying out loud.
740
00:33:34,758 --> 00:33:36,896
I don't have to stand here
and defend myself.
741
00:33:36,896 --> 00:33:39,034
This is the same old argument.
742
00:33:39,034 --> 00:33:43,896
I don't need to be
beaten into submission,
made to kowtow.
743
00:33:43,896 --> 00:33:46,344
I'm just not.
I just don't need this.
744
00:33:46,344 --> 00:33:47,724
In the last 18 months,
745
00:33:47,724 --> 00:33:50,137
I've realized that
I'm pretty good.
746
00:33:50,137 --> 00:33:51,793
I'm independent.
747
00:33:51,793 --> 00:33:54,655
And I'm not gonna stand
here and be yelled at.
748
00:33:54,655 --> 00:33:55,896
I just don't need it.
749
00:33:55,896 --> 00:33:57,655
I don't deserve it,
I don't need it.
750
00:33:59,172 --> 00:34:01,655
[Janelle] I don't really
wanna be here anymore.
751
00:34:01,655 --> 00:34:04,379
[Kody] Well, you know what,
the running from our problem,
752
00:34:04,379 --> 00:34:07,206
is just gonna keep us
standing at that bridge
753
00:34:07,206 --> 00:34:09,482
with the torch, Janelle.
We gotta figure this out.
754
00:34:09,482 --> 00:34:11,034
And I'm sorry I'm angry.
755
00:34:13,758 --> 00:34:17,551
- I just, I just survived
a really, really dark place.
- I understand that--
756
00:34:17,551 --> 00:34:18,827
You don't give
a [bleep] though!
757
00:34:18,827 --> 00:34:21,206
- Look at you, dismissing it!
- Okay...
758
00:34:21,206 --> 00:34:23,172
- [Kody] Would you ever
have any empathy for me?
- [Robyn] Please don't leave.
759
00:34:23,172 --> 00:34:24,310
[Robyn] Can we
just keep talking?
760
00:34:24,310 --> 00:34:26,137
[Kody] When you're in pain,
I try to understand you.
761
00:34:26,137 --> 00:34:28,068
Kody? Can we please keep
talking, Janelle? Please?
762
00:34:28,068 --> 00:34:31,586
Janelle, this is a really
bad idea for you to walk
off on this one.
763
00:34:41,241 --> 00:34:43,482
[Robyn] Can we please keep
talking, Janelle? Please?
764
00:34:43,482 --> 00:34:46,482
[Kody] Janelle, this is
a really bad idea for you
to walk off on this one.
765
00:34:46,482 --> 00:34:49,068
Well, all you're doing
is yelling at me.
766
00:34:49,068 --> 00:34:51,827
[Robyn] So if
he stops yelling,
767
00:34:53,413 --> 00:34:54,793
can we keep talking, please?
768
00:35:01,758 --> 00:35:03,137
I have a few more minutes.
769
00:35:04,344 --> 00:35:06,413
- [Robyn] Will you stop--
- [Kody] I really apologize,
770
00:35:06,413 --> 00:35:08,517
but every time we start
talking about this stuff...
771
00:35:08,517 --> 00:35:10,448
- [Robyn] I know.
- ...I'm, like, on
the verge of losing it.
772
00:35:10,448 --> 00:35:11,724
I know you are, I know.
773
00:35:11,724 --> 00:35:13,689
'Cause I know
the weight of it, now.
774
00:35:13,689 --> 00:35:15,241
- I know you do.
- More than I ever did.
775
00:35:16,068 --> 00:35:17,206
Okay, so...
776
00:35:18,517 --> 00:35:21,310
...the 2020, the COVID,
777
00:35:21,310 --> 00:35:23,482
there was a lot
of disagreements, okay?
778
00:35:23,482 --> 00:35:26,310
So is there a way
to come back from it,
779
00:35:26,310 --> 00:35:28,103
I guess is the question.
780
00:35:28,103 --> 00:35:31,655
I started all of this
discussion about
vacation rental,
781
00:35:31,655 --> 00:35:33,724
because, Kody, you told me
782
00:35:33,724 --> 00:35:38,000
that the boys were
not welcome until they
apologized to everybody
783
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:39,862
because they had
been so abusive.
784
00:35:39,862 --> 00:35:42,034
- And so--
- No, just me and Robyn.
785
00:35:42,034 --> 00:35:43,965
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah. Mm.
786
00:35:43,965 --> 00:35:45,827
No, why is he
talking about me?
787
00:35:45,827 --> 00:35:47,482
He doesn't need to be
talking about me.
788
00:35:47,482 --> 00:35:49,689
I don't know why
he's bringing up my name.
789
00:35:49,689 --> 00:35:53,068
They were literally accusing
her of the dictates
790
00:35:53,068 --> 00:35:54,413
that I was putting out there.
791
00:35:54,413 --> 00:35:55,862
Hey, you know what? I can't...
792
00:35:57,241 --> 00:35:59,413
Robyn wasn't asking
for the apology.
793
00:35:59,413 --> 00:36:00,586
This is me,
794
00:36:00,586 --> 00:36:02,724
originally asking for apology,
795
00:36:02,724 --> 00:36:04,931
but, just saying,
let's clear the air.
796
00:36:04,931 --> 00:36:07,793
Let's not act like something
didn't go wrong here.
797
00:36:07,793 --> 00:36:09,448
Maybe it's just too raw.
798
00:36:09,448 --> 00:36:12,655
Maybe this year,
we actually do skip
Christmas together.
799
00:36:12,655 --> 00:36:15,482
From experience,
the more you, uh,
800
00:36:15,482 --> 00:36:18,517
just ignore situations and you
don't have conversations,
801
00:36:18,517 --> 00:36:19,793
and you don't work on it,
802
00:36:19,793 --> 00:36:21,517
the further and further
you grow apart.
803
00:36:21,517 --> 00:36:23,137
I think a lot of people
804
00:36:23,137 --> 00:36:26,344
put a lot of blame
on Robyn in our family.
805
00:36:26,344 --> 00:36:30,137
I think there's been
different times in all
of our lives where, like,
806
00:36:30,137 --> 00:36:32,896
we've been the one
that it's been easy
to pin all the blame on.
807
00:36:32,896 --> 00:36:34,931
You know,
I see that with Kody.
808
00:36:34,931 --> 00:36:36,620
You know, and I see
that with me.
809
00:36:36,620 --> 00:36:40,275
And I've seen it
with different people
throughout the years.
810
00:36:40,275 --> 00:36:43,517
I think we've all
taken our turns being
the one blamed.
811
00:36:43,517 --> 00:36:46,689
I know I've had blame
for things in the past.
812
00:36:46,689 --> 00:36:49,482
But there's gotta be
a place where eventually,
813
00:36:49,482 --> 00:36:52,793
as a family, I mean,
whatever, you know,
814
00:36:52,793 --> 00:36:54,655
- different parts
of the family--
- I think we were all willing
815
00:36:54,655 --> 00:36:56,000
to just come together,
816
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:58,482
and just sort of be
the best of it at Christmas,
817
00:36:58,482 --> 00:37:00,827
but then Kody started being,
like, "Well, they can't come."
818
00:37:00,827 --> 00:37:03,379
- And--
- No, Janelle, because,
I feel like we've had years,
819
00:37:03,379 --> 00:37:05,482
this is what happened, okay?
820
00:37:05,482 --> 00:37:07,137
I mean, COVID's
just a battleground.
821
00:37:07,931 --> 00:37:09,724
But Christine just left.
822
00:37:09,724 --> 00:37:11,482
Here's what I think
is so interesting.
823
00:37:11,482 --> 00:37:14,241
He always wants to fall back
to this, "I've been divorced."
824
00:37:14,241 --> 00:37:17,620
And I'm, like, dude.
You were a participant
in this divorce.
825
00:37:17,620 --> 00:37:19,517
It wasn't like
it broadsided you.
826
00:37:19,517 --> 00:37:21,241
You've had a lot of rejection
827
00:37:21,241 --> 00:37:23,103
over the last year
and a half, Kody.
828
00:37:23,103 --> 00:37:25,827
And so now, with this
thing with Christine,
829
00:37:25,827 --> 00:37:29,103
it's making it more,
like, in your face.
830
00:37:29,724 --> 00:37:31,551
And that's hard.
831
00:37:31,551 --> 00:37:33,413
You want people
around you to pick sides
832
00:37:33,413 --> 00:37:34,724
'cause you're going
through pain.
833
00:37:36,103 --> 00:37:38,758
[Kody] I, literally,
ladies, I'm really sorry.
834
00:37:38,758 --> 00:37:41,931
I just got caught
in my emotion here.
835
00:37:41,931 --> 00:37:43,758
[Robyn] I think, I don't--
836
00:37:43,758 --> 00:37:45,137
No, the thing, Robyn,
837
00:37:45,137 --> 00:37:47,275
I knew better than to do this,
and all of a sudden,
838
00:37:47,275 --> 00:37:49,655
- I'm sitting there
realizing if you pick her...
- But if you were--
839
00:37:49,655 --> 00:37:52,586
- ...then I won't
accept you. [laughs]
- But Kody, listen.
840
00:37:52,586 --> 00:37:54,862
If you hadn't
just gone through
841
00:37:54,862 --> 00:37:56,793
the last year
and a half to two years
842
00:37:56,793 --> 00:37:58,068
with COVID with your kids,
843
00:37:59,206 --> 00:38:01,344
that wouldn't hurt like it is.
844
00:38:01,344 --> 00:38:02,965
Marriages are complex,
845
00:38:02,965 --> 00:38:05,000
but the relationship
between parent and children,
846
00:38:05,689 --> 00:38:07,586
is really complex too.
847
00:38:07,586 --> 00:38:09,758
I mean, I have my own, just,
848
00:38:09,758 --> 00:38:12,344
vast complexities
with my parents.
849
00:38:14,206 --> 00:38:17,000
Yeah, I have my own
daddy issues.
850
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:18,241
So now I've passed that on,
851
00:38:18,241 --> 00:38:19,965
and my sons have daddy issues.
852
00:38:20,862 --> 00:38:21,931
I have no idea.
853
00:38:21,931 --> 00:38:23,620
Maybe I haven't told them
enough I loved them.
854
00:38:23,620 --> 00:38:25,241
I'd sacrifice
my life for them.
855
00:38:26,689 --> 00:38:29,482
[exhales] I thought I was
making huge sacrifices.
856
00:38:29,482 --> 00:38:31,620
I was making huge sacrifices.
857
00:38:33,172 --> 00:38:35,000
And I'm sure everybody else
is having heartbreak.
858
00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:37,517
I'm sure Garrison and Gabriel
are having heartbreak.
859
00:38:39,103 --> 00:38:42,896
They probably wish
I was as loyal to them
860
00:38:42,896 --> 00:38:45,758
as I wish that
they were to me.
861
00:38:45,758 --> 00:38:47,793
And we've kinda been
at war with each other.
862
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:52,068
I think it got worse when,
uh, we talked about,
863
00:38:52,068 --> 00:38:54,137
when Christine wanted
to talk about moving to Utah.
864
00:38:55,827 --> 00:38:57,586
It's like, if we were
all moving to Utah,
865
00:38:57,586 --> 00:39:00,241
would we still
be staying together?
866
00:39:00,241 --> 00:39:02,034
Would the family actually
be on one page?
867
00:39:02,034 --> 00:39:05,482
I don't know, 'cause Kody,
at that point, you were, like,
868
00:39:05,482 --> 00:39:09,586
like, this plural marriage
is flawed and it's a problem,
869
00:39:09,586 --> 00:39:11,724
and this isn't fair,
and this is stupid,
870
00:39:11,724 --> 00:39:14,827
and they, my wives
don't wanna be together.
871
00:39:14,827 --> 00:39:16,586
He's convinced that
the plural marriage is--
872
00:39:16,586 --> 00:39:18,586
[Kody] No, I'm not talking
about plural marriage.
873
00:39:18,586 --> 00:39:21,896
I'm talking about wives
in a relationship through
plural marriage.
874
00:39:22,862 --> 00:39:24,206
I, I'm...
875
00:39:25,793 --> 00:39:27,758
...I'm cynical.
876
00:39:27,758 --> 00:39:31,965
So you feel like in order
to have a functional
plural marriage,
877
00:39:31,965 --> 00:39:35,172
the wives have
to all be best friends,
no ifs, ands or buts?
878
00:39:35,172 --> 00:39:36,310
Listen.
879
00:39:36,310 --> 00:39:38,448
Okay, I don't know if all
of you have played chess,
880
00:39:38,448 --> 00:39:41,000
but if a man's, if a king's
on a chess board,
881
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:42,862
he's nothing without a queen.
882
00:39:44,103 --> 00:39:46,172
But can you imagine
if a guy has three queens?
883
00:39:46,172 --> 00:39:49,034
Now, those three queens
have gotta work together.
884
00:39:49,034 --> 00:39:50,724
So if the king
has three queens,
885
00:39:50,724 --> 00:39:53,344
he can rule the world,
or at least, that chess board.
886
00:39:53,344 --> 00:39:54,551
But guess what?
887
00:39:54,551 --> 00:39:56,896
The queens are always
attacking each other.
888
00:39:56,896 --> 00:39:59,724
And we've just seen
that play out completely.
889
00:40:00,965 --> 00:40:02,103
With Christine.
890
00:40:02,103 --> 00:40:04,310
We went through that process,
891
00:40:04,310 --> 00:40:08,689
of putting our best foot
forward, and being optimistic.
892
00:40:08,689 --> 00:40:11,344
Saying, our lives are great,
we love plural marriage,
893
00:40:11,344 --> 00:40:14,517
the sister wife relationship,
and that bond is very special.
894
00:40:15,724 --> 00:40:17,517
When it really
might not have been.
895
00:40:17,517 --> 00:40:19,000
And so here I am,
896
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,793
in a dark place,
with plural marriage.
897
00:40:21,793 --> 00:40:24,586
Really questioning
whether it's a good idea,
or if it works or not.
898
00:40:25,793 --> 00:40:28,068
Maybe we've done something
wrong along the line.
899
00:40:28,068 --> 00:40:30,413
We've certainly,
like, asked God
900
00:40:31,034 --> 00:40:32,793
to guide us and help us.
901
00:40:33,827 --> 00:40:35,896
I don't wanna
blame plural marriage.
902
00:40:38,413 --> 00:40:40,655
But it just hasn't worked
very well for us.
903
00:40:43,275 --> 00:40:44,896
I wasn't gonna
miss an opportunity
904
00:40:44,896 --> 00:40:47,000
that all my children almost
are gonna be home.
905
00:40:48,241 --> 00:40:49,241
Yeah.
906
00:40:52,206 --> 00:40:54,000
[Janelle] So this gonna
be one of those things
907
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:55,413
where you're gonna have to,
908
00:40:55,413 --> 00:40:58,206
you guys are gonna
have to work it out with
a counselor or something.
909
00:40:58,206 --> 00:41:00,655
Because I can't be in
the middle of it anymore,
910
00:41:00,655 --> 00:41:01,931
'cause it's wrecking us.
911
00:41:03,620 --> 00:41:05,586
They get to pick and choose
who they hang out with,
912
00:41:05,586 --> 00:41:07,517
but I don't. It's weird to me.
913
00:41:10,551 --> 00:41:11,551
Well...
914
00:41:16,275 --> 00:41:17,655
[Kody exhales]
915
00:41:22,068 --> 00:41:23,344
Anyway, I'm sorry.
916
00:41:24,482 --> 00:41:25,482
It's all right.
917
00:41:32,413 --> 00:41:35,241
[Janelle] I just
think we've never
had divides this deep,
918
00:41:35,241 --> 00:41:36,793
and now Christine has left,
919
00:41:36,793 --> 00:41:39,448
and that's obviously a very,
very big departure
920
00:41:39,448 --> 00:41:42,241
from what our family has
looked like for many years.
921
00:41:42,241 --> 00:41:45,620
This is, like, the ultimate
test of our family.
922
00:41:45,620 --> 00:41:48,068
Can we hold it together
with all of this?
923
00:41:49,482 --> 00:41:52,310
[Sukanya Krishnan] Next time
onSister Wives, One on One...
924
00:41:52,310 --> 00:41:55,793
I'm in this place that I might
reconcile with Meri,
925
00:41:55,793 --> 00:41:58,586
and Christine lost
her [bleep] that day.
926
00:41:58,586 --> 00:42:00,482
That's a lie. That's not me.
927
00:42:00,482 --> 00:42:02,931
I never knew about
that moment with him.
928
00:42:02,931 --> 00:42:04,586
I think he has
a favorite wife,
929
00:42:04,586 --> 00:42:07,827
and that's why all
of this is like it is.
930
00:42:07,827 --> 00:42:09,310
Is Robyn the favorite wife?
931
00:42:09,310 --> 00:42:11,241
You know, that's the most
unfair question.
932
00:42:11,241 --> 00:42:12,793
They handed him to me.
933
00:42:12,793 --> 00:42:16,724
And said, "we don't
wanna spend time with
him," basically.
934
00:42:16,724 --> 00:42:20,137
Janelle, this is a really
bad idea for you to walk
off on this one.
935
00:42:20,137 --> 00:42:23,000
He acts like he's the only
person who's been rejected.
936
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:24,413
Where does the relationship
stand now?
937
00:42:25,137 --> 00:42:27,034
I'm separated from Janelle,
938
00:42:27,034 --> 00:42:28,758
and I'm divorced
from Christine.
939
00:42:28,758 --> 00:42:31,482
- Kody and I have separated.
- What?
940
00:42:31,482 --> 00:42:33,586
[Krishnan] This is
Sister Wives: One on One.