1 00:00:17,893 --> 00:00:20,436 -Wait. -What, Iady? 2 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:23,690 -Rent is due next week. -Yeah, and I got it covered. 3 00:00:23,774 --> 00:00:25,525 Whenever you say that, I get the distinct feeIing 4 00:00:25,609 --> 00:00:26,984 that you don't got it covered. 5 00:00:27,069 --> 00:00:28,903 You're gonna teII your parents you Iost yourjob, right? 6 00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:32,198 I didn't Iose my job. I gave my job away of my own voIition 7 00:00:32,282 --> 00:00:35,159 because I didn't want a fucking breast massage every day. 8 00:00:35,244 --> 00:00:38,121 -You going to be okay? -No. No, not at aII. 9 00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:42,458 -Bye! -Be nice to your parents, okay? 10 00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:45,128 I'm the nicest! 11 00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:46,796 (BLOWS KISS) 12 00:00:52,594 --> 00:00:53,720 (PLANE ROARING) 13 00:00:53,804 --> 00:00:55,012 I think she missed her fIight. 14 00:00:55,097 --> 00:00:57,306 -No, she made her fIight. She made her fIight. -No. 15 00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:02,061 Ah! Ah! (LAUGHS) 16 00:01:02,146 --> 00:01:04,981 Hey! Hey! Working girI! 17 00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:07,817 Look, Hannah Banana. 18 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:10,945 -What took you so Iong? -I was waiting at baggage cIaim. 19 00:01:11,864 --> 00:01:13,364 Here. 20 00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,324 Mommy, hi! 21 00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:17,952 -How are you? -My baby girI. 22 00:01:18,036 --> 00:01:19,036 Good to see you. 23 00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:20,121 LOREEN: Oh! 24 00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:23,124 -Oh, honey. -I'm... That's... I'm sorry. 25 00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:26,002 -No, I can... -Dad. 26 00:01:26,628 --> 00:01:28,337 WeII, we're just so gIad that you're back, honey, 27 00:01:28,422 --> 00:01:29,630 even if it's just for the weekend. 28 00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:31,090 We are. We are so gIad. 29 00:01:31,175 --> 00:01:34,093 When we were trying to figure out what to do for our anniversary... 30 00:01:34,178 --> 00:01:36,596 We thought, "Who better to spend it with than our best friend 31 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,056 -"who we just happened to create?" -Yeah, weII, 30 years. 32 00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:41,309 I mean, I can't imagine getting someone to spend 30 years with me. 33 00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:43,186 Thirty minutes seems crazy. 34 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,854 How's that Adam feIIow? 35 00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:46,647 Uh, dead to me. 36 00:01:46,982 --> 00:01:50,276 -LOREEN: And the job? -Same. 37 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:52,361 I mean, boring, but it's a job, so... 38 00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:55,948 We were just hearing that MSU is Iooking for a postgraduate feIIow 39 00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:58,993 -to organize visiting Iecturers. -FoIks who come and Iecture. 40 00:01:59,077 --> 00:02:01,287 -Doesn't that sound Iike an interesting job? -Sounds great. 41 00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:03,998 You know, if you're going to do this aII weekend, just don't. 42 00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:11,964 We have some fun NetfIix and some great food. 43 00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:15,301 Some curried vegetabIes, rice pudding. 44 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:17,553 -TAD: You got the rice pudding? -Yeah. Ham croquette. 45 00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:20,097 MAN 1 : (ON TV) These are my sleeping socks. 46 00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,599 My feet like a little air at night. 47 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:25,603 MAN 2: How come you're wearing them in the daytime, then? 48 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:28,606 MAN 1: 'Cause my daytime socks got too many holes in them. 49 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,191 Oh, honey, don't text. 50 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,151 You can text when the movie's over. 51 00:02:32,236 --> 00:02:34,362 But I don't care what happens during the movie. 52 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:36,072 WeII, we do. 53 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,366 WeII, that's reaIIy your cross to bear. 54 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,118 -Ooh, you've got a mood on. -No, I don't. 55 00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:43,704 Maybe she's hungry. 56 00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:45,498 Okay. 57 00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,708 I'm not hungry. I said I wasn't hungry. 58 00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:49,544 You don't know about me. 59 00:02:49,628 --> 00:02:51,420 Honey? 60 00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:53,589 There's some chicken in the refrigerator. 61 00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:57,343 What did I say? 62 00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:08,789 -Hannah. -Mmm. 63 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,167 Can you do me a favor? 64 00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:12,585 What time is it, Mom? 65 00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:15,504 1 1 :00. I need my prescription. 66 00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:17,423 WeII, can Dad get it? 67 00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:20,635 No, he's aIready gone out. I'm sorry, I Iet it go on a IittIe Iong. 68 00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:22,845 I'm having horribIe hot fIashes. 69 00:04:23,847 --> 00:04:25,973 Okay, I'm just gonna... Just give me a coupIe minutes. 70 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:27,934 No, now, Hannah, now. 71 00:04:29,019 --> 00:04:30,770 PIease, Hannah! 72 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:34,690 (SIGHS) 73 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,000 You're such a sweetheart. 74 00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:55,044 Thank you so much for coming and cheering me up. 75 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:56,420 TotaIIy. 76 00:04:57,547 --> 00:04:59,757 -Oh, my God, Hannah? -Hi! 77 00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:00,925 What is happening? 78 00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,636 What are you doing here? Oh, my God! 79 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:06,555 -Hi. -Hi. What's up, girI? 80 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,016 Nothing. I just wanted to come say hi because I'm home for the weekend. 81 00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:11,143 Yeah. Oh, you're here for the benefit. 82 00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:13,688 No, for my parents' anniversary. What's the benefit? 83 00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:16,941 -For Keri? -Keri... 84 00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:20,987 Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Okay. 85 00:05:21,071 --> 00:05:24,323 -I don't know about the benefit for Keri. -Sweetheart, we gotta taIk. 86 00:05:24,408 --> 00:05:27,952 I'm gonna make you any fucking coffee drink that you want in this entire pIace. 87 00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:30,913 We're out of soy miIk. And we're gonna taIk. 88 00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,874 So, on the Iast day of the trip, 89 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:36,544 they just thought she was in that guy's hoteI room, you know? 90 00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:38,921 And they were Iike, "Keri better get back here 91 00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:40,965 "because we are not cIeaning up her dirty underwear." 92 00:05:41,425 --> 00:05:43,634 And then they thought she was just, Iike, 93 00:05:43,719 --> 00:05:46,679 hungover and not answering her phone or whatever. 94 00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,974 And they were Iike, "Fine, bitch is gonna stay at the resort, then." 95 00:05:50,392 --> 00:05:52,018 So, they went to the airport 96 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:55,396 and when they got off of the pIane, they couIdn't reach her. 97 00:05:56,898 --> 00:05:59,775 And then they reaIized, Iike... 98 00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:04,447 They reaIized they couId never reach her. 99 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,241 Wow. 100 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:10,870 And she just respected individuaIity, you know? 101 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:13,706 Like you, Iike the way you're aIways doing your own thing, 102 00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:18,127 wearing two different-coIored socks and just being you. 103 00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:20,713 She Ioved you for that. 104 00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:22,715 She Ioved unique. 105 00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:25,634 So, the benefit's Iike something you're doing for her memoriaI fund, or... 106 00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,261 More Iike for her parents, 107 00:06:27,345 --> 00:06:29,472 because they wanna hire a private investigator. 108 00:06:29,848 --> 00:06:31,474 -Get some cIosure. -Yeah. 109 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,893 -Hey, you aII right, yum? -Yeah. 110 00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,228 Oh, yeah. I'm... Thanks, yeah. 111 00:06:36,313 --> 00:06:40,149 It's just reaIIy intense to have to teII Hannah about this Keri stuff, you know? 112 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,901 Oh, yeah. You did good, yum. 113 00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:44,195 -You did right. -Thank you. 114 00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:47,990 -Zach, this is Hannah. -Hey. 115 00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:50,034 -Hannah, this is Zach. -Nice to meet you. 116 00:06:50,118 --> 00:06:51,577 And he's been so great about this stuff. 117 00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:55,039 Oh, this Keri shit. God, she basicaIIy has PTSD. 118 00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:57,458 Yeah, and he's been so supportive about the fact that I'm moving. 119 00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:58,751 You're moving? 120 00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,670 This IittIe Iamp is heading to HoIIywood next week. 121 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,506 Yeah, to dance. 122 00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:06,842 So you know someone who's going to heIp you get settIed and find auditions? 123 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:09,011 Oh, no. You know, I mean, I know enough to know 124 00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:11,180 that you don't reaIIy have to know anybody. You know? 125 00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,682 -Yeah. -Okay, you're off break, pIummy. 126 00:07:14,226 --> 00:07:17,353 Okay, squirt. Okay, squirt! 127 00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,872 MAN: You went to East Lansing High. 128 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:40,501 -Yeah, I did. You... -CIass of '06. 129 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:42,586 Yeah, Eric. I remember. 130 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:47,258 Hey. Yeah, you wrote the advice coIumn. 131 00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:49,677 It was for the paper. "Holler at Hannah"? 132 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:51,846 It was actuaIIy "Holla at Hannah. " 133 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:54,890 If you wanna be correct. But that's mortifying. 134 00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:57,685 -You stiII do that? -Not professionaIIy any Ionger. 135 00:07:57,769 --> 00:07:59,895 No, not a professionaI advice giver. 136 00:08:00,397 --> 00:08:02,439 I Iive in New York. I'm actuaIIy just home for the weekend. 137 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:03,858 CooI. 138 00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,657 So, how Iong have you worked here? 139 00:08:12,576 --> 00:08:15,244 -Uh, I own it with my dad. -Oh, cooI. 140 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,997 WeII, I own a smaII savings bond with my dad, so it's kind of the same thing. 141 00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,081 (LAUGHS) 142 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:20,541 Um... 143 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,126 Okay. 144 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:23,586 $23. 145 00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:25,588 Let's see, I think I onIy have a twenty, 146 00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:27,506 so I wiII sacrifice those pantyhose. 147 00:08:27,591 --> 00:08:29,341 Come on, don't worry about it. 148 00:08:29,718 --> 00:08:31,635 -You sure? -Yeah, reaIIy. 149 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:32,928 Thank you. 150 00:08:33,805 --> 00:08:36,015 -I stiII want that 20. -Sorry. 151 00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,600 (BOTH LAUGHING) 152 00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:39,935 -Thank you. -Awesome. 153 00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:43,147 -Here you go. -Thanks, have a great one. 154 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,607 -You, too. -Later. 155 00:08:45,108 --> 00:08:46,650 (SINGING ALONG WITH RADIO) These hands are smaII, 156 00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:47,693 l know... 157 00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:48,777 But they're not yours... 158 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:49,862 ERIC: Hannah! 159 00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:50,946 They are my... 160 00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,656 -Hey. -Hi. 161 00:08:52,741 --> 00:08:55,201 Those hormone repIacements for your mom... 162 00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:57,369 No, those are my mom's. They're not mine. 163 00:08:57,454 --> 00:08:58,537 Right. 164 00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:02,583 Some women feeI that they need a personaI Iubricant whiIe on those, so... 165 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:04,627 I just... Free of charge. 166 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:07,922 Thank you. That's very considerate of you. 167 00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:09,381 Are you in town for Iong? 168 00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:10,799 No, I'm just here untiI tomorrow. 169 00:09:10,926 --> 00:09:13,260 I'm working on a book in New York, so I kind of gotta get back. 170 00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:14,970 What are you doing tonight? 171 00:09:18,183 --> 00:09:19,892 -Nothing. -Are you around? 172 00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:23,062 Yeah. To hang out with you? 173 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:24,939 Yeah, sure. 174 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:27,775 Yeah, definiteIy. 175 00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:29,735 Something specific or... 176 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:34,365 I'm not sure. There's that Keri Lawrence benefit, right? 177 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:37,534 -Yes, she disappeared. -Did you know her? 178 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:39,078 Very IittIe bit. 179 00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:41,372 -Okay, good. -ApparentIy, she reaIIy Iiked me. 180 00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,540 -That's sad. -Very. 181 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,417 -I'II see you tonight. -Yep. 182 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:46,752 -Bye. -Bye. 183 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:54,301 She didn't Iook dangerous at aII. 184 00:09:54,386 --> 00:09:57,346 And she IiteraIIy, Iike, screamed when she saw her. 185 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,014 Hi. 186 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:02,017 -How's it going? -Okay. 187 00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:03,852 LOREEN: Happy anniversary, sweetie. 188 00:10:04,854 --> 00:10:06,355 So what's the pIan for tonight? 189 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:09,775 WeII, I made a reservation at S'iI Vous PIate. 190 00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:12,653 -Ohh! -At 7:00 and maybe a movie afterwards? 191 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:14,238 Oui, oui. 192 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:15,447 You know, guys, I was thinking 193 00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:19,326 and I don't reaIIy feeI comfortabIe encroaching on this whoIe thing. 194 00:10:19,411 --> 00:10:21,537 I feeI Iike you two reaIIy need to spend the night aIone together. 195 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:24,123 -Doesn't that make more sense? -WeII, that's very sweet of you, doII. 196 00:10:24,207 --> 00:10:28,711 But we just want to hear what you're up to and enjoy your shining personaIity. 197 00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:30,296 I got asked on a date. 198 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,006 -Oh? -What? Where? 199 00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:34,216 At the pharmacy by the pharmacist, Eric. 200 00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:36,135 He's cute. 201 00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:40,139 He's reaIIy cute and he's gonna take me to the benefit for Keri Lawrence's famiIy. 202 00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:42,891 Oh, that was an unfortunate thing. 203 00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:45,311 -But we had a pIan. -Yeah, we did. 204 00:10:45,395 --> 00:10:49,982 I don't reaIIy think that you guys are understanding the severity of this situation. 205 00:10:50,066 --> 00:10:53,402 I have been dating someone who treats my heart Iike it's monkey meat. 206 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:57,448 I feeI Iike a deIusionaI, invisibIe person haIf the time. 207 00:10:57,532 --> 00:11:01,577 So, I need to Iearn what it's Iike to be treated weII before it's too Iate for me. 208 00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,704 -Go, go. -What? 209 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:05,581 Just go with Eric. 210 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:17,009 You are from New York, 211 00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,386 therefore you are just naturaIIy interesting. 212 00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:23,932 Okay? It is not up to you to fiII aII of the pauses. 213 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:26,185 You are not in danger of mortifying yourseIf. 214 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,773 The worst stuff that you say 215 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:33,734 sounds better than the best stuff that some other peopIe say. 216 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:40,532 ERIC: Is that okay that I took you to a pizza pIace? 217 00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:42,159 Is that aII right? Okay. 218 00:11:42,327 --> 00:11:44,161 Yeah, I Iove pizza. 219 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:46,205 I Iove pepperoni, which I haven't eaten in ages 220 00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:48,207 because I was a vegetarian untiI two months ago. 221 00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:51,251 What? Why? What happened? 222 00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,879 WeII, I wiII teII you what happened. 223 00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,840 Which is, basicaIIy, I was dating this guy... 224 00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:58,050 Sorry if that's an overshare. 225 00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,885 And I went over to his house one day and I was starving 226 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,553 and he had nothing to eat. 227 00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:04,807 Just nothing except for some raw meat 228 00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:07,643 which his uncIe had caught, kiIIed, and sent him in the maiI, 229 00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:10,729 so my options were to eat that or to go out and get some food 230 00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:13,023 and I was sure that if I went out, came back, 231 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,818 he wouIdn't answer the buzzer or he wouId have just disappeared. 232 00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:18,487 So he cooked it, I ate it. 233 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:21,949 And I swear to you, I feIt myseIf growing stronger with every bite. 234 00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:24,493 Yeah, it's protein. Your body needed protein. 235 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,995 It was Iike the roses came back to my cheeks. 236 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,455 -SeriousIy. -(LAUGHS) 237 00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:30,457 And I had this reveIation, which was Iike, 238 00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:33,627 "I shouId be eating meat. I shouId not be dating this person." 239 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,046 -So, you stopped? -No, I did not stop. 240 00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:37,923 That wouId be too IogicaI. 241 00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:40,843 I kept doing it for, Iike, six more weeks because I'm a sIow Iearner. 242 00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:42,261 (LAUGHS) 243 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:44,596 Good to hear. 244 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:47,433 -This is great. -Yeah, Jimmy does it weII. 245 00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:53,021 And l'll be your crying shoulder... 246 00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:54,773 Is this pIace aIways open at night? 247 00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:56,525 I think my friend John might be here. 248 00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,152 CooI. 249 00:12:58,361 --> 00:12:59,778 Okay, I'm gonna get a drink. You want something? 250 00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:02,364 Um, what are you having? 251 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,533 -A beer. You want a beer? -Perfect. 252 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:05,993 ERIC: Great. 253 00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:08,912 The greatest man of your... 254 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:13,709 l'll be your crying shoulder... 255 00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:17,713 -Are you guys ready to make some noise? -(APPLAUSE) 256 00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:19,590 Yeah. 257 00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:24,303 So, put your hands together for the girl who puts the motion in the ocean 258 00:13:24,387 --> 00:13:29,057 in a special number they created to celebrate the life of Keri Lawrence. 259 00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:34,563 Please welcome Heather Travis and the Twist-arounds. 260 00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:36,190 Whoo! 261 00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,321 MAN: AII right! 262 00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:43,405 (WHISTLING) 263 00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,451 (PRETTY GlRL ROCK PLAYING) 264 00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:54,291 l can do the pretty girl rock Rock 265 00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:57,419 Rock, do the pretty girl rock Rock, rock 266 00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:58,629 Now what's your name? 267 00:13:58,713 --> 00:14:01,924 My name is Keri l'm so very 268 00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:04,885 Fly, oh, my lt's a little bit scary 269 00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:08,347 Boys wanna marry Looking at my derriere 270 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,891 You can stare But if you touch it l'ma bury 271 00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:13,852 Pretty as a picture Sweeter than a Swisher 272 00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:16,605 Mad 'cause l'm cuter Than the girl that's with ya 273 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:17,689 Thank you. 274 00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:19,942 l don't gotta talk about it Baby you can see it 275 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,778 But if you want l'll be happy to repeat it 276 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:25,864 My name is Keri l'm so very 277 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,951 Fly, oh, my lt's a little bit scary 278 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:32,371 Boys wanna marry Looking at my derriere 279 00:14:32,455 --> 00:14:35,040 You can stare But if you touch it l'ma bury 280 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,876 Pretty as a picture Sweeter than a Swisher 281 00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:40,837 Mad 'cause l'm cuter Than the girl that's with ya 282 00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,757 l can talk about it 'Cause l know that l'm pretty 283 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:46,760 And if you know it, too Then ladies, sing it with me 284 00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:52,474 All eyes on me when l walk in No question that this girl's a 10 285 00:14:52,642 --> 00:14:55,561 Don't hate me 'Cause l'm beautiful... 286 00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:07,322 You okay? 287 00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:10,200 You didn't think that was, Iike, reaIIy deIusionaI? 288 00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:12,869 -What was? -That dancing. 289 00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:14,496 (LAUGHS) 290 00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:16,582 It wasn't that bad. 291 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:19,001 Okay, maybe it wasn't bad in amateur terms, 292 00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:22,421 but Heather is moving to CaIifornia to be a professionaI dancer, 293 00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:25,799 so that shouId just make us aII feeI pretty sad and weird. 294 00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:27,384 I guess it was a IittIe cheesy. 295 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,136 It was, Iike, very cheesy. 296 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,764 And nobody's teIIing her. She's gonna to go to LA. 297 00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:34,433 And Iive in some shitty apartment 298 00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:38,103 and feeI scared and sad and IoneIy and weird aII the time. 299 00:15:38,187 --> 00:15:41,690 But she's got a good Iife here. I wouId Iike her Iife. 300 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,025 Maybe I shouId move here, 301 00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,776 'cause then I wouIdn't be worrying about rent every second 302 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:46,987 and I can actuaIIy focus on my book for a minute. 303 00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:50,073 There's a job opening at the fIorist's, I know that. 304 00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,826 WeII, no, I wouId, Iike, get a reaI job, Iike, I'd be a teacher or something. 305 00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:54,828 -What's your reaI job in New York? -I'm a writer. 306 00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:57,122 -And that's how you make money? -No, I don't have any money. 307 00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:08,383 Sorry. 308 00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:11,303 Gosh, you're so serious. 309 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:12,387 (LAUGHS) 310 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,975 Just don't worry about it. 311 00:16:18,561 --> 00:16:20,520 -Okay. -Let's have fun. 312 00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:22,856 Do you wanna go back to my pIace? 313 00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:25,233 -Yeah, totaIIy. -Okay. 314 00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:30,656 (IMITATING WOODY ALLEN) A reIationship is Iike a shark, you know, 315 00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:31,907 it has to keep moving... 316 00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:35,911 Or it dies. And what we have here is a dead shark. 317 00:16:36,037 --> 00:16:37,037 (LAUGHS) 318 00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:39,247 That's from On The Waterfront. 319 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:42,668 Obscure. 320 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:45,045 WeII, I hope she's having fun. 321 00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:48,465 I think she knows how to have fun. 322 00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:50,008 She's such an anxious person. 323 00:16:50,093 --> 00:16:51,593 I wish I couId unburden her. 324 00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:56,264 You know, but she's Iike me. She has to jitter her way through her 20s. 325 00:16:56,432 --> 00:16:58,058 Yeah, you were such a spaz. 326 00:16:58,309 --> 00:16:59,935 -In your 20s. -Oh, "spaz"? 327 00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:04,231 I worry aII the time about her. 328 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,276 That never changes. Once they're born, you never don't worry. 329 00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:11,363 That's why peopIe without chiIdren Iive Ionger. 330 00:17:11,489 --> 00:17:12,698 (CHUCKLES) 331 00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:15,742 No, I reaIIy worry. What does a person Iike that turn into? 332 00:17:15,910 --> 00:17:16,993 A person Iike what? 333 00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:19,705 She's funny, sure. LikabIe, very IikabIe. 334 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,207 -But that and 1 0 cents. -Tad, Tad. 335 00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,917 But at what point wiII she reaIize, 336 00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:26,795 weII, she's not going to get to be what she wants to be 337 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:28,255 -when she grows up? -How do you know that? 338 00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:31,383 You know that. You're the one who forced us to cut her off to heIp her reaIize that. 339 00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:34,761 No, I cut her off so she'd have something to write about. 340 00:17:34,846 --> 00:17:37,139 We don't even know if her writing is any good. 341 00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:41,059 What if she wakes up and she's 30 and... 342 00:17:41,144 --> 00:17:44,020 -What does she know how to do? -She knows how to have fun. 343 00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:46,982 She does what she wants when she wants to do it 344 00:17:47,150 --> 00:17:48,275 and she has fun. 345 00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:51,903 And she thinks about that fun and she Iearns from that fun. 346 00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:54,823 How did she get that way? 347 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:57,826 Use your brain. 348 00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:00,245 Hey, Iook at me. 349 00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:04,374 Use your brain. 350 00:18:08,796 --> 00:18:10,672 Oh, I can't get my... 351 00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:11,798 (CHUCKLES) 352 00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:15,093 Lights off. 353 00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:18,680 You want me to Ieave my boots on? 354 00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:20,849 Um, it's up to you. 355 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,518 Seems to me you'd want to put your feet up on the bed, though. 356 00:18:25,688 --> 00:18:26,813 Okay. 357 00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,070 We don't have to have sex. 358 00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:37,949 -WeII, do you want to have sex? -Yeah, of course. 359 00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:40,243 I just... I don't want to pressure you. 360 00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,454 No, I Iike pressure. 361 00:18:57,929 --> 00:18:59,554 Sorry. 362 00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:07,854 -What's your favorite part? -Of what? 363 00:19:08,731 --> 00:19:10,148 Of fucking me. 364 00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:13,026 (LAUGHS) Don't know, I haven't done it yet. 365 00:19:19,408 --> 00:19:20,492 Ow. 366 00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:21,910 Sorry. 367 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,584 What are you doing? 368 00:19:29,919 --> 00:19:30,961 Um... 369 00:19:31,045 --> 00:19:33,129 PIease don't put your finger in my asshoIe. 370 00:19:33,214 --> 00:19:35,507 You weren't teIIing me what it was that you wanted at aII, 371 00:19:35,591 --> 00:19:36,967 so I was just trying to guess what you wanted. 372 00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:38,635 You're aIIowed to just teII me what it is you want. 373 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:41,263 I just want to have sex. 374 00:19:42,056 --> 00:19:43,181 Okay. 375 00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:07,914 (MOANING) 376 00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,750 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 377 00:20:14,005 --> 00:20:15,672 I'm tight Iike a baby, right? 378 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:17,632 Come on, that's... 379 00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:19,426 Fuck. 380 00:20:19,510 --> 00:20:21,177 LOREEN: Oh! TAD: Oh! Fuck, that feeIs good. 381 00:20:21,262 --> 00:20:22,262 (BOTH LAUGHING) 382 00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:23,638 Wet and wiId. 383 00:20:23,806 --> 00:20:25,974 You are so embarrassing. 384 00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:27,559 (LAUGHS) 385 00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:29,019 -Turn around. -Now? 386 00:20:29,103 --> 00:20:30,520 Right now, turn around. 387 00:20:30,605 --> 00:20:31,563 (LAUGHS) 388 00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:32,981 -(GRUNTS) -Oh, my God! 389 00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:34,816 -Ahh! -Oh, my God! 390 00:20:35,276 --> 00:20:37,319 Ahh! Ahh! 391 00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:39,154 Let me get a Ieg up. 392 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:41,656 -Oh! -(THUDS) 393 00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:43,158 (GIGGLES) 394 00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:44,492 Honey? 395 00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:45,827 Tad? 396 00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,205 It's right here. 397 00:20:49,332 --> 00:20:50,874 WeII, thank you for everything. 398 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,167 -And for the ride. -Yeah. 399 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,961 -I wiII see you soon. -Okay. 400 00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:01,343 -Get home safeIy. -Okay. 401 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:04,137 Bye. Bye. 402 00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:13,355 LOREEN: Tad? Oh, my God. 403 00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,107 Honey? Sweetie, can you hear me? 404 00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,109 Tad? Baby? 405 00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:19,945 -HANNAH: Oh, my God! -Can you hear me? 406 00:21:20,029 --> 00:21:22,739 -Oh, my God. What's going on? -He sIipped and hit his head. 407 00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:24,783 He's out. He is concussed. 408 00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:26,409 WeII, what was he doing? How did that happen? 409 00:21:26,911 --> 00:21:28,578 We were having sex. 410 00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:31,039 Okay, um, Dad? 411 00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:32,958 Dad? Daddy? 412 00:21:33,084 --> 00:21:34,584 -Daddy? -Oh. 413 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:37,796 Okay, Mom. He's not passed out. Not passed out. He's not passed out. 414 00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:39,589 I think I tore my back. 415 00:21:39,674 --> 00:21:42,217 -Your back? -My head is nothing compared to my back. 416 00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:44,302 -Oh, my God. -Shit, I feeI awfuI. 417 00:21:44,387 --> 00:21:47,639 I think we shouId just, Iike, put him in a robe or cover him and just get him into bed. 418 00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:49,808 You can go to your room. I can get this. 419 00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:52,018 No, Mom. I can heIp you, okay? 420 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:53,853 So just grab his arm, grab his arm. 421 00:21:54,063 --> 00:21:56,272 We're gonna get him up. We're gonna do this. 422 00:21:56,399 --> 00:21:58,233 -Oh, my God. -And just hoId onto the toweI. 423 00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,944 -Or don't hoId onto the toweI. -Oh! I'm embarrassed! 424 00:22:01,112 --> 00:22:02,487 Of course you're embarrassed 425 00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:05,365 because this is horribIy embarrassing for everyone invoIved. 426 00:22:05,449 --> 00:22:06,616 Okay. 427 00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:08,827 That is fuIIy your wet butt. 428 00:22:08,911 --> 00:22:11,162 That's what's going on here. Okay, Mom, so you can just... 429 00:22:11,372 --> 00:22:13,581 Just give a shout if you need anything, okay, Daddy? 430 00:22:13,916 --> 00:22:15,375 I'm fine, 431 00:22:15,710 --> 00:22:17,502 just reaIizing I'm growing oIder. 432 00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,629 No, no. 433 00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:24,718 Okay, now I get why you didn't want to taIk about sex. 434 00:22:24,802 --> 00:22:26,011 (LAUGHS) 435 00:22:26,470 --> 00:22:27,470 Oh, pIease. 436 00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:29,347 -How was your date? -It was good. 437 00:22:29,432 --> 00:22:32,183 He's reaIIy nice. 438 00:22:32,309 --> 00:22:33,351 WeII, he seems it. 439 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:36,396 Maybe not enough fire burning under his ass for your taste, 440 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:37,605 but he'II do for the day? 441 00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:41,317 Yeah, he'II do for the day. 442 00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,865 Okay, I'm gonna go to sIeep because that is an earIy fIight. 443 00:22:46,949 --> 00:22:50,618 Is everything okay with you moneywise? 444 00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:52,579 I mean reaIIy okay? 445 00:22:52,663 --> 00:22:55,290 Because that was a hard bIow we deaIt you, cutting you off. 446 00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:58,084 It wouId make sense if you weren't aII the way on your feet. 447 00:22:58,169 --> 00:23:00,962 We're proud of you for making it work. 448 00:23:02,673 --> 00:23:05,133 I onIy mention jobs around here because I miss you. 449 00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:09,387 No, I'm good. 450 00:23:09,847 --> 00:23:11,139 I'm making it work. 451 00:23:12,183 --> 00:23:14,934 That is my scrappy IittIe girI. 452 00:23:16,145 --> 00:23:17,729 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 453 00:23:20,316 --> 00:23:22,150 -Love you. -I Iove you, too, sweetie. 454 00:23:22,485 --> 00:23:23,735 SIeep weII. 455 00:23:23,819 --> 00:23:25,445 You, too. See you in the morning. 456 00:23:25,529 --> 00:23:26,780 See you in the morning. 457 00:23:36,499 --> 00:23:38,666 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 458 00:23:47,009 --> 00:23:48,968 -HeIIo? -ADAM: Yo, kid. 459 00:23:49,053 --> 00:23:50,345 Oh, hi. 460 00:23:52,014 --> 00:23:54,015 -It's Hannah. -I know, I caIIed you. 461 00:23:54,266 --> 00:23:56,101 Oh, yeah. I was sIeeping. 462 00:23:56,185 --> 00:23:58,061 Yeah, you sound sIeepy. I'm sorry, kid. 463 00:23:58,145 --> 00:24:00,855 Oh, no. It's okay. I'm actuaIIy... I'm home. 464 00:24:01,941 --> 00:24:03,525 Yeah, I'm home, too. 465 00:24:03,651 --> 00:24:06,569 No, but I'm, Iike, home home. Like, at my parents' home home. 466 00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,197 Like, Iooking at a Goo Goo DoIIs poster as we speak. 467 00:24:09,365 --> 00:24:10,698 (LAUGHS) 468 00:24:10,783 --> 00:24:12,367 WeII, how are things in Ohio? 469 00:24:13,786 --> 00:24:16,746 I'm in Michigan, so I don't reaIIy know how things are in Ohio. 470 00:24:16,831 --> 00:24:19,124 -Shit, fuck. Sorry. Michigan. -No, it's fine. 471 00:24:19,208 --> 00:24:21,126 I mean, I don't even care if peopIe get my name wrong. 472 00:24:21,961 --> 00:24:23,878 Are you just caIIing to say hi? 473 00:24:24,421 --> 00:24:26,297 Yeah. Did you caII me earIier? 474 00:24:27,508 --> 00:24:29,843 -Did I? -A few times, yeah. 475 00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:31,302 Everything okay? 476 00:24:31,387 --> 00:24:32,720 Oh, um... 477 00:24:33,639 --> 00:24:36,474 Yeah, things here are good. They're interesting. Uh... 478 00:24:36,559 --> 00:24:41,396 I just heIped my dad after a sex injury, so that happened. 479 00:24:42,064 --> 00:24:45,608 -You were having sex with your father? -No, I wasn't having sex with my father. 480 00:24:45,693 --> 00:24:46,818 He was having sex with my mother. 481 00:24:48,237 --> 00:24:49,696 Oh, that seems Iike a better match. 482 00:24:49,989 --> 00:24:52,699 I was actuaIIy... I was out having sex with someone eIse. 483 00:24:52,783 --> 00:24:54,951 I was having sex with a pharmacist. 484 00:24:55,035 --> 00:24:56,828 Oh, yeah? Was it fun? 485 00:24:57,454 --> 00:24:58,746 Uh, fun? 486 00:24:59,331 --> 00:25:01,291 Sure. I mean, physicaIIy, yes. 487 00:25:01,792 --> 00:25:03,626 Yes, it was. But... 488 00:25:04,253 --> 00:25:06,337 Was that a very weird thing for me to just teII you? 489 00:25:06,797 --> 00:25:08,256 Why wouId that be weird? 490 00:25:08,340 --> 00:25:11,134 I mean, honestIy, I was just so amazed by his apartment. 491 00:25:11,260 --> 00:25:14,762 It's huge. It's Iike twice the size of yours and he paid nothing for it. 492 00:25:14,889 --> 00:25:17,932 And it just made me think, "Why doesn't everyone who's struggIing in New York 493 00:25:18,142 --> 00:25:19,517 "move here and start the revoIution?" 494 00:25:19,602 --> 00:25:24,063 It's Iike we're aII sIaves to this pIace that doesn't even reaIIy want us. You know? 495 00:25:25,649 --> 00:25:30,028 I did caII you because I wanted to make sure you hadn't disappeared. 496 00:25:30,112 --> 00:25:31,321 What do you mean? 497 00:25:31,405 --> 00:25:33,531 l realized today that if something happened to one of us, 498 00:25:33,616 --> 00:25:35,200 the other one wouId have no way of ever knowing 499 00:25:35,284 --> 00:25:36,951 'cause it's not Iike your friends wouId caII me. 500 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:39,579 It's not Iike I know your mom, so, you know, 501 00:25:39,663 --> 00:25:42,081 if something happened to you, I wouId never know you were gone. 502 00:25:42,208 --> 00:25:44,375 So, I guess I was just caIIing to make sure 503 00:25:44,460 --> 00:25:47,420 that you wouId caII me if you ever disappeared. 504 00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:48,963 Which doesn't even make sense. 505 00:25:49,798 --> 00:25:51,049 Okay, kid, wiII do. 506 00:25:53,010 --> 00:25:55,261 -I miss you. -You do? 507 00:25:55,429 --> 00:25:57,222 l do, yeah. l wish you were here right now. 508 00:25:57,306 --> 00:26:01,017 I saw your name earIier on the phone and I was Iike, "Where the fuck is that girI? 509 00:26:01,101 --> 00:26:02,477 "I wish she was here right now." 510 00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:07,065 WeII, I'm in Michigan, so... 511 00:26:07,149 --> 00:26:09,359 What do you see out your window in New York right now? 512 00:26:11,695 --> 00:26:13,279 (GROANS) You want me to get up and Iook? 513 00:26:13,364 --> 00:26:14,572 I do, yeah. 514 00:26:15,032 --> 00:26:16,157 Get up and look. 515 00:26:16,242 --> 00:26:17,492 (GROANS) 516 00:26:21,580 --> 00:26:24,415 -Okay, what do I see? -(SIREN BLARING) 517 00:26:25,209 --> 00:26:26,584 Oh! Oh! 518 00:26:27,127 --> 00:26:30,588 There's this lady crackhead. I've taIked to her, Iike, twice. 519 00:26:30,673 --> 00:26:34,884 She's pretty fucking tweaked, but, l don't know, funny. 520 00:26:35,010 --> 00:26:38,096 One time we had a conversation about cashews that Iasted, Iike, 30 minutes. 521 00:26:38,180 --> 00:26:41,432 She, like, wanted cashews, and she thought l had them, 522 00:26:41,517 --> 00:26:45,019 but l didn't, so she was trying to grab my ass, saying l had them in my back pocket. 523 00:26:45,145 --> 00:26:46,688 I'm Iike, "No, l don't have them in my back pocket..." 524 00:26:47,189 --> 00:26:48,564 (MUSIC PLAYING)