1 00:00:01,667 --> 00:00:03,367 [instrumental music] 2 00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:11,067 He ha ha! 3 00:00:12,533 --> 00:00:14,633 - Daffy! - You don't gotta shout. 4 00:00:14,700 --> 00:00:16,133 I'm right here, man. 5 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:18,400 Why are there lobsters in my swimming pool? 6 00:00:18,467 --> 00:00:20,633 Because your bathtub wasn't big enough. 7 00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:23,433 There you go. Just like the ocean. 8 00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:25,333 Why do you have lobsters at all? 9 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,800 I'm gonna sell 'em. Lobsters go for $20 a pound. 10 00:00:28,867 --> 00:00:31,833 I bet this chubber bubber will fetch 100 bucks easy. 11 00:00:31,900 --> 00:00:34,800 A relatively painless way to make a living 12 00:00:34,867 --> 00:00:36,667 if I do say so myself. 13 00:00:36,733 --> 00:00:39,533 Ow! Bla-a-ah! 14 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,900 [screaming] 15 00:00:43,567 --> 00:00:45,000 splash 16 00:00:45,067 --> 00:00:46,433 snap snap snap 17 00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:48,833 Relatively painless. 18 00:00:48,900 --> 00:00:51,433 [theme music] 19 00:01:11,633 --> 00:01:13,367 [cell phone ringing] 20 00:01:13,433 --> 00:01:15,033 - Go. - It's Tina. 21 00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:16,800 (Daffy) 'Oh, hey. Let me ask you something.' 22 00:01:16,867 --> 00:01:19,533 If someone were to turn their bedroom into a nightclub 23 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:20,733 would you be into that? 24 00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:23,033 Don't turn your bedroom into a nightclub. 25 00:01:23,100 --> 00:01:24,733 I said someone. 26 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:28,200 (Tina) Listen, there's something I gotta talk to you about. 27 00:01:28,267 --> 00:01:29,900 My dad's coming in to town. 28 00:01:29,967 --> 00:01:31,233 Oh, meet the parents. 29 00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:33,900 - How long's he here? - A week. 30 00:01:33,967 --> 00:01:35,700 But you're not gonna meet him. 31 00:01:35,767 --> 00:01:38,367 Wait a second. You didn't tell him about us? 32 00:01:38,433 --> 00:01:40,667 Yeah, I told him I have a boyfriend named Daffy Duck 33 00:01:40,733 --> 00:01:42,100 and that's all he needs to know. 34 00:01:42,167 --> 00:01:43,600 Are you ashamed of me? 35 00:01:43,667 --> 00:01:45,433 You think your dad won't like me? 36 00:01:45,500 --> 00:01:47,567 Why? 'Cause I ain't got no class? 37 00:01:47,633 --> 00:01:51,700 'Cause I ain't got no money, no job, no education? 38 00:01:51,767 --> 00:01:53,700 Yeah, all that stuff. 39 00:01:53,767 --> 00:01:55,367 Well, your dad sounds very judgmental. 40 00:01:55,433 --> 00:01:58,033 Look, Daffy, those things don't matter to me. 41 00:01:58,100 --> 00:02:00,400 You know I love you, but my dad's tough. 42 00:02:00,467 --> 00:02:02,467 He doesn't think anyone's good enough for me. 43 00:02:02,533 --> 00:02:04,167 I'll call you when he leaves. 44 00:02:04,233 --> 00:02:06,567 Hey, dad! 45 00:02:06,633 --> 00:02:08,333 So glad you made it! 46 00:02:10,667 --> 00:02:12,900 People need to chill out. 47 00:02:12,967 --> 00:02:15,300 [disco music] 48 00:02:19,267 --> 00:02:21,000 Aah! 49 00:02:22,133 --> 00:02:23,533 Hey, Bugs. What you doin'? 50 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:26,933 I'm going to the beach to set some lobsters free. 51 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,900 Oh, fun, I'd love to come with you 52 00:02:29,967 --> 00:02:31,967 but I'm allergic to shellfish. 53 00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:35,233 Uh.. 54 00:02:38,833 --> 00:02:40,400 Hey, Daffy, you and Tina wanna do something 55 00:02:40,467 --> 00:02:42,100 with me and Bugs this week? 56 00:02:42,167 --> 00:02:43,567 I'm not allowed to see Tina this week. 57 00:02:43,633 --> 00:02:45,533 - Her dad's in town. - So? 58 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:48,300 She doesn't want me to meet him. She doesn't think he'll like me. 59 00:02:48,367 --> 00:02:50,133 Well, you're gonna have to meet him at some point. 60 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:52,333 I mean, don't you plan on being with Tina forever? 61 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:53,733 I hope so. 62 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,633 Well, then, at some point you're gonna have to ask him 63 00:02:55,700 --> 00:02:57,567 for his daughter's hand in marriage. 64 00:02:57,633 --> 00:02:59,300 Do people still do that? 65 00:02:59,367 --> 00:03:01,467 Daffy, Tina's not gonna wait on you forever. 66 00:03:01,533 --> 00:03:03,667 She's a catch. You are lucky to have her. 67 00:03:03,733 --> 00:03:05,133 I mean, you ain't got no class. 68 00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:08,133 You ain't got no money, no job, no education. 69 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:10,233 - So what do I do? - I don't know. 70 00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:11,767 But if you wanna keep Tina, then you're gonna have 71 00:03:11,833 --> 00:03:14,633 to convince her dad that you're good enough for her. 72 00:03:19,367 --> 00:03:21,167 See that place over there? 73 00:03:22,700 --> 00:03:24,833 You mean that rinky-dink copy store? 74 00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:27,900 That's where I work. I'm the assistant general manager. 75 00:03:27,967 --> 00:03:30,833 Well, as far as I'm concerned, you shouldn't have to work. 76 00:03:30,900 --> 00:03:32,300 That so-called boyfriend of yours 77 00:03:32,367 --> 00:03:34,133 he should be the one taking care of you. 78 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:35,967 Dad, I like working. 79 00:03:36,033 --> 00:03:38,700 And what does this Daffy Duck do for a living, anyway? 80 00:03:38,767 --> 00:03:41,300 - Tell me. - Oh, you know, stuff. 81 00:03:41,367 --> 00:03:43,300 Stuff? What do you mean stuff? 82 00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:45,767 Are you telling me that he's unemployed? 83 00:03:47,767 --> 00:03:49,667 Dad, Daffy's a good guy. He's... 84 00:03:49,733 --> 00:03:51,767 - A lawyer? - A what? 85 00:03:51,833 --> 00:03:53,500 'Why didn't you tell me he was a lawyer?' 86 00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,567 I mean, that's fantastic. This is great. 87 00:03:55,633 --> 00:03:57,700 When am I gonna meet this wonderful person? 88 00:03:57,767 --> 00:03:59,300 Oh, you know, I don't know. 89 00:03:59,367 --> 00:04:03,033 I'm sure he's very busy being a liar. I mean a lawyer. 90 00:04:03,100 --> 00:04:05,500 Honey, a young man is never too busy 91 00:04:05,567 --> 00:04:08,400 to meet his girlfriend's father, remember that. 92 00:04:11,567 --> 00:04:15,333 I can't believe that you're dating a lawyer. 93 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:17,533 I can't either. 94 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:19,033 (Lola) 'Oh, hi, Tina.' 95 00:04:19,100 --> 00:04:21,667 So you're here to see Daffy? Is this your dad? 96 00:04:21,733 --> 00:04:24,400 Hi. I'm Lola, Daffy's secretary. 97 00:04:24,467 --> 00:04:27,667 Can I get you a cup of coffee or a banana milkshake? 98 00:04:27,733 --> 00:04:29,933 A coffee is fine. 99 00:04:33,100 --> 00:04:34,767 ding 100 00:04:36,133 --> 00:04:38,667 Uh, Mr. Duck, we have some visitors. 101 00:04:38,733 --> 00:04:39,833 (Daffy) 'I'll be right out.' 102 00:04:39,900 --> 00:04:41,567 'Let me just wrap up this call' 103 00:04:41,633 --> 00:04:43,967 'with the supreme court.' 104 00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:51,833 You must be Mr. Russo. 105 00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,900 It's such a pleasure to meet the father 106 00:04:53,967 --> 00:04:56,933 of the most wonderful woman in the world. 107 00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,733 You can call me Frank. 108 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,500 We saw your face on a bus bench. 109 00:05:00,567 --> 00:05:03,800 Oh, that was Lola's idea. Gets the firm's name out there. 110 00:05:03,867 --> 00:05:06,233 Nothing wrong with a little hustle. Am I right, Frank? 111 00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:08,400 Well, this has been a lot of fun 112 00:05:08,467 --> 00:05:10,933 but we gotta get you checked in to the hotel. 113 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,100 Hotel? Hush. You can't stay at a hotel. 114 00:05:14,167 --> 00:05:15,833 - You'll stay at my house. - No, no, no, no. 115 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:17,967 Oh, no, really? Oh, that would be great. 116 00:05:18,033 --> 00:05:20,900 - I-I hate hotels. - Then stay at my place. 117 00:05:20,967 --> 00:05:23,267 Honey, your apartment is too small. 118 00:05:23,333 --> 00:05:24,933 That's why I was staying at a hotel. 119 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,867 No, no. I insist you stay at my house. 120 00:05:27,933 --> 00:05:30,933 What good is it to be successful enough to own your own home 121 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,433 'with a pool in an upscale neighborhood' 122 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,500 'if you can't share it?' 123 00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:35,833 Then it's all settled. 124 00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:38,667 Now come on, Tina, we've taken up entirely too much 125 00:05:38,733 --> 00:05:41,033 of this fine young man's time. 126 00:05:42,867 --> 00:05:46,633 Ahem. Lola, will you get Judge Judy on the line? 127 00:05:46,700 --> 00:05:48,267 [door closes] 128 00:05:48,333 --> 00:05:50,500 And I'll have another banana milkshake. 129 00:05:52,967 --> 00:05:54,633 Are you Daffy Duck? 130 00:05:54,700 --> 00:05:56,633 Do I look like Daffy Duck? 131 00:05:56,700 --> 00:05:58,600 I just need a signature. 132 00:05:58,667 --> 00:05:59,767 What did he order now? 133 00:05:59,833 --> 00:06:01,800 - Bring her in! - Bring who in? 134 00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:04,167 [horse neighs] 135 00:06:11,700 --> 00:06:14,600 Bugs, I'm home! Hope you didn't make a big dinner. 136 00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:17,167 I'm kind of filled up on banana milkshakes. 137 00:06:18,633 --> 00:06:21,467 My pony's here! 138 00:06:21,533 --> 00:06:23,333 - He's great. - It's a she. 139 00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:26,033 - She's great. - Why did you order a pony? 140 00:06:26,100 --> 00:06:28,000 Pony rides can be very lucrative. 141 00:06:28,067 --> 00:06:30,333 We got Gossamer living across the street. 142 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:31,967 He's got a bunch of little kid friends. 143 00:06:32,033 --> 00:06:33,467 We charge 'em ten bucks a ride 144 00:06:33,533 --> 00:06:36,133 bing, bam, boom, money in my pocket. 145 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:39,067 Well, you're the one who got rid of the lobsters. 146 00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:42,633 Where's she gonna sleep? 147 00:06:42,700 --> 00:06:45,133 Out here with Taz. Don't worry about it. 148 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:46,700 It's not your problem. 149 00:06:46,767 --> 00:06:48,867 No, wait, right now, I've got my hands full 150 00:06:48,933 --> 00:06:51,933 pretending to be a lawyer, so it is your problem. 151 00:06:54,067 --> 00:06:56,333 Why are you pretending to be a lawyer? 152 00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:59,100 Because Tina's dad is in town, and I need to impress him. 153 00:06:59,167 --> 00:07:00,167 [doorbell rings] 154 00:07:00,233 --> 00:07:01,833 That's them now. 155 00:07:01,900 --> 00:07:03,367 Oh, one more thing. 156 00:07:03,433 --> 00:07:05,367 I told him he could stay here while he's in town. 157 00:07:05,433 --> 00:07:06,700 Why did you do that? 158 00:07:06,767 --> 00:07:09,700 I can't lose Tina. I need him to like me. 159 00:07:09,767 --> 00:07:13,133 [sighs] Fine. 160 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,167 Oh, I also told him this is my house 161 00:07:15,233 --> 00:07:16,733 and you're my loser, deadbeat roommate 162 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,233 who I'm letting stay here until you get back on your feet. 163 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:23,900 I'm not just successful, you know. I'm also compassionate. 164 00:07:23,967 --> 00:07:26,033 Frank. 165 00:07:26,100 --> 00:07:28,400 What in the world is that ridiculous 166 00:07:28,467 --> 00:07:29,700 thing in the driveway? 167 00:07:29,767 --> 00:07:32,900 Oh, it's my, I mean, it's, uh, it's, uh.. 168 00:07:32,967 --> 00:07:35,967 It's my parade float. I made it out of old newspapers. 169 00:07:36,033 --> 00:07:38,567 It seemed like a good use of two and a half years of my life. 170 00:07:38,633 --> 00:07:41,333 Oh, you. You must be the deadbeat roommate. 171 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:44,333 It's awfully nice of Daffy to let you stay here. 172 00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:46,667 Oh-ho-ho, you have no idea. 173 00:07:46,733 --> 00:07:48,900 I don't have to pay for anything around here. 174 00:07:48,967 --> 00:07:51,533 Rent, food. I just take, take, take. 175 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:54,533 Ah, Daffy's a saint to put up with me. 176 00:07:56,300 --> 00:07:59,667 Wow, Daffy, You have some beautiful home here. 177 00:07:59,733 --> 00:08:02,267 Thank you very much. I like it. 178 00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,367 Let me get you something to drink. 179 00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:10,733 Mm-hmm. And what is it that, uh, you do again? 180 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:12,600 Nothing, really, I mean, I've gone months 181 00:08:12,667 --> 00:08:14,100 without leaving the house. 182 00:08:14,167 --> 00:08:16,067 'Until this morning, I was running a lobster farm' 183 00:08:16,133 --> 00:08:19,267 out of the swimming pool, but now I'm on to pony rides. 184 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:20,933 Next week, who knows? 185 00:08:21,033 --> 00:08:23,833 You see, I'm more of an idea guy than a hard-work-follow-through 186 00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:25,600 kind of guy. 187 00:08:25,667 --> 00:08:28,133 Come on. I'll show you the pony. 188 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,800 Huh. Would you look at that? 189 00:08:30,867 --> 00:08:33,433 No telling how old this is. 190 00:08:33,500 --> 00:08:35,667 Want a bite? 191 00:08:40,233 --> 00:08:41,800 I think your dad likes me. 192 00:08:41,867 --> 00:08:44,500 Are you out of your mind? Pretending to be a lawyer? 193 00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:46,600 Tina, everyone knows that a father 194 00:08:46,667 --> 00:08:49,267 wants his daughter to be with either a doctor or a lawyer 195 00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:50,967 and I couldn't pretend to be a doctor 196 00:08:51,033 --> 00:08:53,767 because the last time I did that, I almost killed someone. 197 00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:56,167 I'm gonna almost kill you. 198 00:08:56,233 --> 00:08:59,167 This is crazy. I thought you'd be happy. 199 00:08:59,233 --> 00:09:02,200 I swear I can never predict your reaction to things. 200 00:09:02,267 --> 00:09:03,667 So this is your plan? 201 00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:05,833 Just lie to my father for the rest of your life? 202 00:09:05,900 --> 00:09:08,833 I'm doing this for us, I want your dad to like me 203 00:09:08,900 --> 00:09:12,133 so that he'll say yes when I ask for your hand in marriage. 204 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:15,333 - What? - Relax. Not now. 205 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,700 One day in the future, when you have a better job 206 00:09:17,767 --> 00:09:21,033 and you can afford to give us the lifestyle we deserve. 207 00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:23,033 Well, I'm not a real wizard. 208 00:09:23,100 --> 00:09:25,000 It just says that on my business cards. 209 00:09:25,067 --> 00:09:27,133 Dad, are you sure you don't wanna stay with me? 210 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,533 No, no, no, honey. I'm fine, believe me. 211 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,333 Daffy'll take good care of me. 212 00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:33,333 You don't hear that every day. 213 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:34,900 Sorry I have to work tomorrow. 214 00:09:34,967 --> 00:09:38,067 We'll be fine. It'll give your dad and me a chance to hang out. 215 00:09:38,133 --> 00:09:40,567 Uh, don't you have to work tomorrow? 216 00:09:40,633 --> 00:09:42,333 Oh, right. I'm a lawyer. 217 00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,667 What time do you usually get in to the office? 218 00:09:44,733 --> 00:09:47,067 I don't know. Usually roll in around noon. 219 00:09:47,133 --> 00:09:49,167 He's at his desk at 6:30. 220 00:09:49,233 --> 00:09:51,533 - In the morning? - Don't look at me. 221 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:55,067 I didn't tell you to become a lawyer. Night! 222 00:09:57,267 --> 00:10:00,533 - Goodnight, Frank. - 'Nighty-night, guys.' 223 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,500 Hey, Bugs, thanks for going along with the charade. 224 00:10:03,567 --> 00:10:05,533 - I owe you one. - 'Don't mention it.' 225 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,867 I'm serious, if you ever need legal advice 226 00:10:08,933 --> 00:10:10,067 you know who to call. 227 00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:13,533 - An actual lawyer. - Oh, right. 228 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,567 What are you doing? This is my room. 229 00:10:15,633 --> 00:10:17,000 If I'm gonna pretend to be you 230 00:10:17,067 --> 00:10:19,567 might as well get into character. 231 00:10:25,433 --> 00:10:28,800 Sheesh. I really am filthy, aren't I? 232 00:10:28,867 --> 00:10:31,133 [disco music] 233 00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:40,100 [chair squeaking] 234 00:10:42,367 --> 00:10:46,133 [sighs] I should have pretended to be a doctor. 235 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:48,133 I have good news. 236 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:51,433 Tina's dad went home early, and I can get back to my old life? 237 00:10:51,500 --> 00:10:53,233 No. We got our first client. 238 00:10:53,300 --> 00:10:55,733 Client? Who told you to get a client? 239 00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:57,967 I thought we agreed never to answer the phone. 240 00:10:58,033 --> 00:11:00,267 But you said you were bored. I thought you'd be happy. 241 00:11:00,333 --> 00:11:03,300 Swear I can never predict your reaction to things. 242 00:11:05,967 --> 00:11:07,667 [laughs] 243 00:11:09,033 --> 00:11:11,067 Daffy's one disturbed individual. 244 00:11:11,133 --> 00:11:13,000 - What you reading there? - My diary. 245 00:11:13,067 --> 00:11:15,167 I'm learning a lot about myself. 246 00:11:15,233 --> 00:11:17,800 [laughs] 247 00:11:17,867 --> 00:11:20,133 - I wear a toupee? - Really? 248 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,567 Well, it's a really good one. 249 00:11:21,633 --> 00:11:24,400 I mean, I would have thought that was your real hair. 250 00:11:26,867 --> 00:11:29,133 I didn't know you were a lawyer. 251 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:31,967 I am this week, so let me get this straight 252 00:11:32,033 --> 00:11:35,833 you burned the roof of your mouth on a slice of hot pizza 253 00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:38,500 and now you want to sue Pizzariba. 254 00:11:38,567 --> 00:11:40,300 Why didn't you just blow on it? 255 00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:41,667 No one told me to. 256 00:11:41,733 --> 00:11:44,033 I need to be protected from myself. 257 00:11:44,100 --> 00:11:47,167 My mouth is ruined. I can't talk no more. 258 00:11:47,233 --> 00:11:48,633 You're talking right now. 259 00:11:48,700 --> 00:11:51,700 Well, uh, I can't taste nothin' no more. 260 00:11:51,767 --> 00:11:52,800 slurp 261 00:11:52,867 --> 00:11:55,167 Mmm. This is good banana shake. 262 00:11:55,233 --> 00:11:58,700 You can really taste that banana. 263 00:11:58,767 --> 00:12:01,200 I don't know. Suing Pizzariba? 264 00:12:01,267 --> 00:12:02,867 It just doesn't seem right. 265 00:12:02,933 --> 00:12:05,333 Speedy's a decent, hardworking person. 266 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,000 I've known him for years. He lives in my house. 267 00:12:08,067 --> 00:12:10,500 How many of you are livin' over there? 268 00:12:10,567 --> 00:12:14,800 Let's see, there's me, Bugs, Speedy 269 00:12:14,867 --> 00:12:16,900 Frank, and Taz. 270 00:12:16,967 --> 00:12:19,400 Oh, and we just got a pony. 271 00:12:19,467 --> 00:12:21,700 So will you take my case? 272 00:12:21,767 --> 00:12:23,800 I'm sorry, but Speedy's a friend. 273 00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:26,067 Come on, I heard about this lady 274 00:12:26,133 --> 00:12:28,167 who burnt her tongue on a cup of hot coffee 275 00:12:28,233 --> 00:12:30,733 and she won a million dollars. 276 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:33,700 A million dollars? 277 00:12:33,767 --> 00:12:36,867 Lola, why don't you go ahead and draw up a contract? 278 00:12:36,933 --> 00:12:39,067 (Lola) 'You got it.' 279 00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:41,533 'I'm sorry. What's a contract?' 280 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:42,667 beep beep beep 281 00:12:42,733 --> 00:12:44,200 Woops! 282 00:12:47,067 --> 00:12:48,500 [instrumental music] 283 00:12:52,767 --> 00:12:55,300 - Oh, hey. Where you going? - Work. 284 00:12:55,367 --> 00:12:58,167 Work? It's Saturday. We were gonna spend time with my dad. 285 00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:01,367 Tina, you knew when you decided to date a lawyer 286 00:13:01,433 --> 00:13:03,067 that there would be sacrifices. 287 00:13:03,133 --> 00:13:07,233 For me, I'm afraid it's career, then family. 288 00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:09,767 I've always been upfront about this. 289 00:13:09,833 --> 00:13:12,067 There's nothing upfront about this! 290 00:13:12,133 --> 00:13:13,733 It's a giant lie! 291 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:16,967 I'll try to get home early, but I can't promise anything. 292 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:22,900 Dad. Bugs. 293 00:13:22,967 --> 00:13:25,133 (Frank) 'We're out here, honey.' 294 00:13:27,467 --> 00:13:29,733 [neighs] 295 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:32,600 - What are you doing? - A pony ride. 296 00:13:32,667 --> 00:13:34,767 Honey, I grew up in the concrete jungle. 297 00:13:34,833 --> 00:13:36,533 I've never been on one of these things. 298 00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:39,567 I've never seen one of these things. I mean, this is great. 299 00:13:39,633 --> 00:13:41,267 - You wanna go next? - No. 300 00:13:41,333 --> 00:13:44,033 - I'm good. - Hmm. 301 00:13:44,100 --> 00:13:47,100 So Daffy can't hang out with us today. 302 00:13:47,167 --> 00:13:48,500 He's gotta work. 303 00:13:48,567 --> 00:13:52,067 Wow. That kid really keeps his beak to the grindstone. 304 00:13:52,133 --> 00:13:54,467 Hey, Bugs, how 'bout you? You got any plans today? 305 00:13:54,533 --> 00:13:56,300 Oh, I never have plans. 306 00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:58,433 Well, that's great. Come on, let's go grab some lunch. 307 00:13:58,500 --> 00:14:01,100 - I'll drive. - Let's take the pony. 308 00:14:01,167 --> 00:14:04,500 Can you believe this guy? What a guy. 309 00:14:04,567 --> 00:14:07,033 No, I really can't. 310 00:14:08,833 --> 00:14:11,933 - Come on, Tina. - I'll meet you there. 311 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,100 Giddy-up! Yah! Yah! 312 00:14:14,167 --> 00:14:15,800 [laughs] 313 00:14:15,867 --> 00:14:18,267 Giddy-up! Yee-hah! 314 00:14:18,333 --> 00:14:20,633 [instrumental music] 315 00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:22,700 One slice of hot pizza. 316 00:14:25,367 --> 00:14:28,767 And we'll see just how hot. 317 00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:33,000 What are you doing? What's this? 318 00:14:33,067 --> 00:14:35,833 - You just got served. - You're suing me? 319 00:14:35,900 --> 00:14:37,833 On behalf of my client. 320 00:14:37,900 --> 00:14:40,500 Who is Samuel Rosenbaum? 321 00:14:40,567 --> 00:14:43,333 - Our next door neighbor, Sam. - Yosemite? 322 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:46,700 He wants me to pay him a million dollars because my pizza's hot? 323 00:14:46,767 --> 00:14:48,967 It's supposed to be hot. Blow on it. 324 00:14:49,033 --> 00:14:51,167 It's just business, nothing personal. 325 00:14:51,233 --> 00:14:54,733 Okay, then you just got unserved. 326 00:14:56,033 --> 00:14:58,000 I'll see you in court. 327 00:14:58,067 --> 00:15:01,067 - You're not a lawyer. - Tell it to the judge. 328 00:15:02,233 --> 00:15:04,067 ♪ Tu-du du-du-du ♪ 329 00:15:04,133 --> 00:15:07,167 ♪ Duba-duba du duba-duba du ♪ 330 00:15:07,233 --> 00:15:09,000 ♪ Duba-duba du ♪ 331 00:15:09,067 --> 00:15:10,400 ♪ Tu du-du-du-du ♪ 332 00:15:10,467 --> 00:15:12,033 ♪ Duba duba du ♪ 333 00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:14,367 ♪ Duba duba du ♪ 334 00:15:14,433 --> 00:15:15,400 ♪ Tu du-du ♪ 335 00:15:15,467 --> 00:15:17,167 ♪ Dubba dub dubba-dubba da ♪ 336 00:15:17,233 --> 00:15:18,733 ♪ Dubba dub dubba-dubba da ♪ 337 00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:20,200 ♪ Dubba dub dubba-dubba da ♪ 338 00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:21,867 ♪ Da-da da-da ♪ 339 00:15:21,933 --> 00:15:23,367 ♪ Pa rap pa ra ♪ 340 00:15:23,433 --> 00:15:25,067 ♪ Pa ra-ra ra ♪ 341 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:26,633 ♪ Pa rap pa ra ♪ 342 00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:28,533 ♪ Pa rap pa ra ♪ 343 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:31,667 ♪ Pa ra ra ♪♪ 344 00:15:31,733 --> 00:15:33,233 [gavel bangs] 345 00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,833 We'll now hear opening statements 346 00:15:34,900 --> 00:15:36,933 in the case of "Samuel Rosenbaum 347 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,933 'versus Speedy Gonzales, proprietor of "Pizzariba."' 348 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,200 'Mr. Duck, you may proceed.' 349 00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:43,867 Thank you, Your Honor. 350 00:15:43,933 --> 00:15:45,567 [clears throat] 351 00:15:45,633 --> 00:15:48,100 The evidence that I will present to you today 352 00:15:48,167 --> 00:15:51,067 will prove beyond a shadow of a doubt 353 00:15:51,133 --> 00:15:53,900 that this gentleman, Speedy Gonzales 354 00:15:53,967 --> 00:15:59,033 Knowingly and willfully served my client dangerously hot pizza 355 00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:01,567 with no warning and with no regard 356 00:16:01,633 --> 00:16:04,867 for the physical and emotional trauma that followed. 357 00:16:04,933 --> 00:16:10,900 I will prove that Mr. Gonzales' carelessness was no accident 358 00:16:10,967 --> 00:16:13,900 but instead the direct result 359 00:16:13,967 --> 00:16:18,367 of his endless need for speed. 360 00:16:18,433 --> 00:16:21,633 We will show you that had Mr. Gonzales 361 00:16:21,700 --> 00:16:26,067 simply taken more time between the oven and the table 362 00:16:26,133 --> 00:16:30,800 to allow the pizza to cool, then this senseless tragedy 363 00:16:30,867 --> 00:16:32,967 could have been avoided. 364 00:16:33,033 --> 00:16:36,367 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury 365 00:16:36,433 --> 00:16:40,867 Mr. Gonzales likes to brag that he's the fastest mouse 366 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:44,933 in all of Mexico, but this is America 367 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:49,467 and in America speed can kill 368 00:16:49,533 --> 00:16:52,133 or in this case, burn. 369 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:55,167 Thank you, Your Honor. 370 00:16:58,700 --> 00:16:59,967 Tchk. 371 00:17:00,033 --> 00:17:01,600 Mr. Gonzales. 372 00:17:01,667 --> 00:17:04,467 Uh, yeah, he's not a real lawyer. 373 00:17:04,533 --> 00:17:08,300 Hmm. Well, then this case is dismissed. 374 00:17:08,367 --> 00:17:10,133 Wow, that was fast, I didn't even have time 375 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:11,433 to get business cards printed. 376 00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:13,433 What about my million dollars? 377 00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:16,267 Why didn't you tell me you weren't a real lawyer? 378 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:19,233 - Aah! - Get them out of my courtroom. 379 00:17:19,300 --> 00:17:21,567 Tsk tsk tsk. Gringos. 380 00:17:23,467 --> 00:17:26,167 [instrumental music] 381 00:17:26,233 --> 00:17:28,467 What's the problem? You went up the stairs. 382 00:17:28,533 --> 00:17:30,333 Wish you didn't have to go, dad. 383 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,800 Oh, me, too, honey. It was such a fun trip. 384 00:17:32,867 --> 00:17:34,100 Attagirl. 385 00:17:34,167 --> 00:17:36,633 Sorry you didn't get to spend much time with Daffy. 386 00:17:36,700 --> 00:17:39,533 Yeah, you know, honey, um, it seems to me that, uh 387 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,767 you don't get to spend much time with Daffy either. 388 00:17:41,833 --> 00:17:43,267 Huh? 389 00:17:43,333 --> 00:17:47,467 Sweetheart, I used to think that you needed a guy with a good job 390 00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:50,333 good education, someone who could support you 391 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:54,833 but what good is any of that stuff if you never see the guy? 392 00:17:54,900 --> 00:17:58,033 Seems to me that Daffy is always working 393 00:17:58,100 --> 00:18:00,667 and besides, you can support yourself. 394 00:18:00,733 --> 00:18:03,000 You're smart. You've got a good job. 395 00:18:03,067 --> 00:18:05,867 What you need is someone fun. 396 00:18:05,933 --> 00:18:08,633 Someone who keeps life interesting 397 00:18:08,700 --> 00:18:11,500 someone who makes you laugh 398 00:18:11,567 --> 00:18:13,733 someone a little crazy. 399 00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:15,133 neigh 400 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:17,400 Someone like Bugs. 401 00:18:17,467 --> 00:18:19,400 - Bugs? - Bugs? 402 00:18:19,467 --> 00:18:20,800 Frank, you got it all wrong. 403 00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:22,433 I made up the whole thing, so you'd like me. 404 00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:25,100 I'm not a lawyer. This isn't even my house. 405 00:18:25,167 --> 00:18:27,733 This is Bugs' house. I'm the deadbeat roommate. 406 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:31,100 I'm the one who ain't got no money, no job, no education. 407 00:18:31,167 --> 00:18:33,167 I'm the one for Tina! 408 00:18:33,233 --> 00:18:35,567 Wait a second. You lied to me? 409 00:18:35,633 --> 00:18:38,600 He was afraid if he was himself, you wouldn't like him. 410 00:18:38,667 --> 00:18:39,867 I was too. 411 00:18:39,933 --> 00:18:42,567 - Dollface, do you love him? - Mm-hmm. 412 00:18:42,633 --> 00:18:44,833 Well, then that's all that matters. 413 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,033 And how 'bout you? 414 00:18:47,100 --> 00:18:48,567 You got any other secrets 415 00:18:48,633 --> 00:18:50,733 that you're not telling me about? 416 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:52,633 Huh? 417 00:18:55,533 --> 00:18:58,033 [laughs] 418 00:18:58,100 --> 00:19:00,533 Ah, boy, I like this guy. 419 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:03,333 I'm watchin' him, but I like him. 420 00:19:04,533 --> 00:19:06,433 Me too. 421 00:19:08,533 --> 00:19:09,833 So get this. 422 00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:13,067 Tina's dad likes the real me more than the fake me. 423 00:19:13,133 --> 00:19:15,467 Does that mean I can stop pretending to be you? 424 00:19:15,533 --> 00:19:16,967 Yeah. Thanks again. 425 00:19:17,033 --> 00:19:18,833 Man, it was kinda fun, actually. 426 00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:22,233 Though I wasn't quite sure what I was supposed to do with this. 427 00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:23,800 [whistles] 428 00:19:23,867 --> 00:19:25,600 [squeals] 429 00:19:25,667 --> 00:19:28,033 My killer whale! 430 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,733 [disco music] 431 00:19:49,867 --> 00:19:51,800 [theme music] 432 00:20:15,567 --> 00:20:17,400 That's all, folks.