FASCINATION
Before we start, I want to tell you a stupid little story
which is mostly about myself.
Let me be your pupil!
Earlier this year,
I unexpectedly became a student under Master Hayashiyate Donbei,
who graciously gave me the name, Kotora.
However, I have one more identity
that I'm not proud of.
I'm a yakuza for the syndicate, Shinjuku Ryuseikai.
I've worked with them for ten years.
In rakugo terms you could say I'm a master.
So, I'm a performer by day and a gangster by night.
My brothers...
call me the Jekyll and Hyde of rakugo.
This is my master of the underworld, the head of the Shinjuku Ryuseikai gang.
Until he gets back the four million yen that he lent his golfing friend,
I cannot turn over a new leaf.
And that golfing friend of his...
is this guy.
So this is some new kind of threat, right?
- What is? - What is... I'm sorry.
What I meant to say is your boss
sent you here to threaten me.
If you agree to teach me rakugo, I'll pay a hundred thousand yen per story.
You want me to pay back my debt with that money?
Got a problem?
It's been two months already,
but you still haven't been able to memorize a whole story...
Hey, I think you're just a bad teacher.
What?
In baseball,
a great athlete doesn't always make a great coach.
My point is, you're probably a bad teacher.
And that's why your son left you.
Excuse me. About this...
The Tiger and Urahara Dragon? You can only get these here!
Do you have any plain ones?
Preferably one that's not mesh.
If it's plain and not mesh, that'd make it a regular t-shirt now, wouldn't it?
- Boss! - What?
I went to pay the store's rent, but there was only 315 yen in the bank.
You know, I was going to pay on your behalf
but you haven't paid me in three months.
Yeah, I know...
You spend four million yen just for your son's indulgences.
Are you an idiot?
If he became a rakugoka, everything would fall into place!
- Yeah... - Do you really understand?
All we sold yesterday was one lighter!
You should get someone else to design the clothes. You should focus on sales.
I know, you're right.
Have him sell that stupid clothing store.
You'd be able to pay off your debts.
Shut up about money already, you ugly cow?
If you want money, get a job as a hostess or a whore!
It's not like you have a boyfriend.
I am aware of this so don't lecture me!
Who the hell do you think you are, acting like you know me?
My son is a rakugo genius.
A thug like you will never be as good as him!
Why don't you go up on stage and try to make the audience laugh?
So, I got yelled at...
And now, here I am sitting before you.
Now,
let us begin with my story...
The Tiger and Dragon!
SHIBAHAMA EPISODE
Everyone!
Are you done shopping?
Yes!
Does anyone need to use the restroom?
We're okay!
What?
Hello!
Weren't you on this tour last Saturday? Sunday, too.
Yes! I love this tour!
Kachidoki Bridge was so fun!
And Nihombashi Mitsukoshi was cool!
We're leaving now, ma'am!
Why don't you move faster, you hag?
Can't you hear the guide?
I'll kill you!
Nobody's killing anyone.
All right everybody! Let's go!
Okay!
Wow, these are all auspicious names!
Let's use them all!
So they gave their baby all the names the monk suggested.
"Hey! Jugemu Jugemu Gokou no Surikizu..."
It's Surikire, not Surikizu.
Oh right... Surikire.
"Hey, Jugemu Jugemu Gokou no Surikire, Kaijari Suigyo no Cream Stew."
What the hell is "Cream Stew"?
Hey, shut up over there. I'm losing track.
"Kaijari Suigyo no Suigyomatsu Unraimatsu Furaimatsu
Ku Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro
Yaburakoji no Suigyomatsu Unraimatsu Furaimatsu..."
"Ku Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Tokoro, Yaburakoji no Suigyomatsu
Unraimatsu Furaimatsu, Ku Neru Tokoro ni Sumu Toko..."
Huh?
He's repeating himself.
This is so irritating! It's "Ponpoko Na no Ponpoko Pii!"
No it's "Ponpoko Pii no Ponpoko Na!"
How many times have you seen this? It's "Ponpoko Na no Ponpoko Pii!"
- Who the hell cares? - We do!
"Jugemu Jugemu Gokou no Surikire, Kaijari Suigyo no Cream Stew."
That's wrong!
- Well... - Try again.
"Jugemu Jugemu Gokou no Surikizu..."
No!
Hello!
Hi, everyone!
Who the hell are you?
He's my little bro.
You don't have to come pick me up every time.
Normal people live here.
It's fine!
I've known him since he was this big!
So, what grade are you in now?
What grade?
I'm in the 4th grade now! Didn't I tell you?
You didn't.
Are you...
a college student?
Yes! Studying commerce!
Pops told me that even yakuza should have college degrees.
Your pops?
There's something strange about Ginjiro.
What?
He's been getting up early these days.
He comes home around 7 or 8 p.m.
And he brings a lot of gifts,
stuff like kaminari okoshi, and ningyo-yaki...
That sounds pretty normal to me...
Idiot! The young master is the heir to the Shinjuku Ryoseikai!
He can only meet a woman of similar status.
A woman?
He means a mistress, Yamazaki.
Don't take your eyes off the boy!
That kid's like me, and he does everything for love.
He might tattoo his girl's name on his body or put pearls on his genitals.
Really?
I have a huge tattoo of a girl's name on my back and...
enough about me.
You better keep your eyes on him, Tora!
You're responsible for his education.
Try to find out what it is.
By the way, is rakugo profitable?
Is it profitable? How many thousands a day?
Thousands?
Zenza have a set salary. 1,000 yen for the first year,
1,200 yen the second, and--
That's it?
- How do you survive off 1,000 yen a day? - Well, they supply us with food...
Second rank has it worst.
We don't get to perform everyday like starters,
so we work part-time.
Part-time? You have another job?
I don't like TV--
You'd never make it on TV with that face.
Mom, turn on the TV. He's on TV!
Money's not everything in this world, Ginjiro.
You share food with your brothers like this,
and train with them.
- We have fun. Right, Mother? - She's not your mother!
I used to admire the "Lone Wolf" aspect of you.
What?
You're not cool anymore.
You're not a wolf now but more like a...
Pigeon! A pigeon that gets excited over a small bag of bird seeds!
Did you all hear that?
He called us pigeons! Doesn't anyone have a comeback?
- Pigeons are the symbol of peace! - Never mind! Let's watch TV.
It's hot!
I can't do it!
The key is to not jump into the water immediately,
so you can convey how hot it is to the viewers.
I can really learn from this!
Donta! Donta!
Here goes!
Hey! Mom...
Hello there, Young Master...
- Kotora? - What?
Hey, handsome!
That's no way to talk to your teacher.
- I found a perfect story for you. - Oh! What is it?
Everything's out of the norm.
It's not that.
It's a story called Shibahama,
a heartwarming story about a couple that's up to their neck in debt...
Well, debts are your specialty, right?
That'll never work!
Even I didn't get lessons.
Hey, I could teach you Shibahama!
Shibahama, Shibahama!
Good evening, it's Komorino Shibahama!
How was that?
At any rate, I'll tell the story tomorrow on stage, so take notes.
Shibahama...
Hey ma'am.
This can't even cover interest.
You understand, right?
Yeah.
And the interest is a measly three percent.
If your husband's not gonna work, it's all up to you then.
That's right! As his wife you should make money handing out wipes...
Anyway, we can't wait a day longer,
so borrow from your parents or relatives.
Maybe your relatives could lend you some. It would be "relatively" simple.
"Relatively" simple.
Shut up already!
When you're doing yakuza work, concentrate on being a yakuza!
And your jokes are lame.
What's that supposed to mean, you idiot!
Even yakuza need a sense of humor nowadays, right?
Anyway, this is all I can give you today.
Is this a joke to you?
Hey, Ginjiro.
What?
Y-You got a girl...
g-girlfriend right now or anything?
Well, there is a girl that I like.
Uh... who?
She's a tour guide.
D-Does she know how you feel, or does she like you back?
Bro.
What?
Why are you asking? I'm really uncomfortable right now.
What do you mean?
I-It's my duty as your older brother to know more about you.
If we continue this topic, I'm going to think that you're gay!
- What? - It was just a joke.
I told you I don't like jokes!
All right, all right. That's dangerous.
Don't worry about it! Listen to me!
Welcome.
TO MASTER HAYASHIYATE DONBEI
DAYTIME PERFORMANCE: HAYASHIYATE DONBEI
- We were waiting for you. - Don-chan!
As always I would like to see how you are all doing through laughter.
It is often said that those from the Edo period never had unnecessary money.
He's going to tell Shibahama today!
They have to use all the money they have within a single day.
Well the recent scams that have been going around
would never work on a person from Edo.
It would be like, "Hello... it's me! It's me!"
"Oh! Who are you? A man from Edo is speaking..."
"Err, well, it's me!"
"Oh, 'it's me'! Okay, what's up?"
"Well, I was in a little accident,
and I really need money.
Could you please transfer some to my account?"
"What bad timing! You shoulda called last night
when I had 5 million yen after winning at the horse races!"
"It's too late already. Of course I don't have the money anymore! Ask someone else!"
You don't know whether they're good with money or just plain stupid!
That was good.
I'll now tell you a story of when Tokyo was once known as Edo.
There was a town called Shiba.
And a fisherman named Uokuma used to work there.
He knew a lot about fish
and was good at what he did,
but he had just one flaw. He loved to drink.
As soon as he drinks, he just puts his business to the side
and forgets about it.
He just says "I don't care about work..."
And so the fish in his bucket were also like...
"Yeah... Yeah..."
"Hey... hey you."
Hey, can you please wake up?
Hey!
Oh, sorry, Master... What time is it?
Oh my...
Are you still dreaming?
What are you looking at me like that for?
Have you forgotten what your wife looks like?
You're... my wife?
How could you ask that?
Are you still drunk from last night?
Can you please wake up?
You promised that you'd go to work today.
Work?
"Well,
I haven't opened store for about 20 days now,
I don't think we can anymore."
"What are you talking about? How long do you think I've been your wife?
I've prepared everything."
"Oh, really."
"Well my kitchen knife." "It hasn't rusted! I just sharpened it!"
"I've lost my sandals!" "I've brought them out already!"
"Oh... well. You've planned for everything."
"Hey! It's still pitch black out!"
"So? The sun will be out
by the time you get to work!"
"Please go!"
"All right I will!
You demon of a wife!" he said
as he finally set out.
Look outside!
- Outside? - See if anyone followed me!
What happened? Were you in a fight?
You are the rashest woman I know, I kid you not.
I told you it was still too early.
What's wrong with you? Have you gone mad?
Why don't you look at this before you talk?
"That's a wallet!"
She exclaimed.
When I got to town, every single vendor was closed.
I was mad, so I was going to come straight home to kick your ass,
but then you'd just kick me out of the house.
So I decided to sit on the basin and smoke,
but I started to get sleepy.
So, I went to the ocean and washed my face to wake myself up, and...
Eighteen, twenty, twenty-two, twenty-four...
Twenty-six, twenty-eight...
Enough already! It's 50 ryo!
50 ryo?
Luck's on my side now!
The gods felt sorry for poor me
so this is how they're helping me out!
But honey...
Get me some sake! Hurry and bring it here!
And so Kuma gets drunk and passes out. Then he wakes up!
And then his wife lies!
And the wallet...
Stop, stop. I already know this story, man.
You still suck at telling stories.
What?
There's no emotion when you tell it.
Then can you do it?
I don't know that story.
Then shut up and listen, you shit!
"Oh, Kuma-san, can you please wake up? Wake up!"
- Ryuji? - Shut up!
"How long do you plan on sleeping, honey?
The sun's up already!
Can you please hurry up and go to work?"
"Work? Don't be stupid!
Why would I go to work when I just found 50 ryo!"
50 ryo?
Don't play dumb! Wow!
You're my wife? You have such a tiny face!
How tall are you?
Are you still drunk?
You seemed awfully happy last night.
Who's going to pay for this?
Don't make me repeat myself.
I gave you that wallet I found.
There was 50 ryo in there!
I don't know what you mean.
Hey, wait.
No matter how cute you are, I'll still kick your ass!
I told you I don't know!
Where is it?
Where's the damn money?
It must've been a dream.
A dream?
"I'm disgusted. You don't work daily,
and all you think about is sake and money.
That's why you dreamt that."
"So what are you trying to say?
Are you saying that I dreamt that I found the wallet
but in reality, I just drank sake?"
"Yeah."
"What a cruel dream..."
"You promised the gods that you'd stop drinking, but that's all you do!
You're being punished."
"Please forgive me! It's as you said. This time I will make my promise to you.
From this day forth, I promise to never drink again.
I'll work my hardest starting tomorrow!
So please take care of today's bill for me. Please!"
"You promise."
"Yes! No matter what happens, I'll never drink!"
And from that day forward, he quit drinking and worked hard.
The story's not done yet.
Then two or three years later, or on New Year's Eve or something...
Shut up! You're too good!
I never knew you had such a talent!
You should do rakugo!
You'd probably make more money than at that store.
I have to get back to the store.
Finish the story! You have a part-timer working there.
I do, but thing is she...
It's nothing.
- You're not done! - It's no fun telling it to you!
You jump in and laugh at the weirdest places!
I'll be quiet.
Her name's Risa, and she hasn't been paid in months.
That's your story!
Shut up about money already, you ugly cow?
If you want money, get a job as a hostess or whore!
You're not meeting anyone anyways.
I regretted what I said.
She was depressed after getting dumped.
I tried to make it better by saying...
In that case,
I'll ask for you--
That's not better.
I didn't know what to say.
What are you doing?
Hey! Stop that!
Let go!
What the hell was that, you ugly cow?
Stop calling me an ugly cow! I want to kill you every time you say it.
It may be a joke to you, but it makes me want to kill you!
What?
She was counting every single time I called her that!
- Logging it in her notebook. - She's surprisingly organized.
Thanks for everything. Send my paycheck to my account.
If you don't pay me by the end of the month, I'll sue you!
God, you stupid ass! Die!
You shouldn't call her an ugly cow. She's pretty cute.
I would never say it even if she was ugly.
She's like a little sister to me, so it was like that.
Oh yeah. It's like calling your dick your "son."
Can't you think of a better analogy?
Doesn't matter. She's an adult, right?
I bet she's already found a good job.
Nah, I doubt that. No way.
Based on past experiences,
it's a guy.
A guy?
It's not the first time I haven't paid her,
but she still worked, even if she did complain.
But once she had a boyfriend, it's downhill from there.
She goes AWOL, steals cash from the register,
and then she quits.
- She comes back after getting dumped. - She's not a bad kid...
Guys just make her lose her morals.
And she's got the absolute worst taste in men.
A poor TV host who already has a kid, an abusive self-taught-DJ...
The student who was a masochist!
Or the student who was a sadochist!
No matter how much I warn her, she doesn't listen.
It's definitely a guy. If it wasn't, she wouldn't get so pissed
over something like not being paid.
- Actually, you should pay her! - Hmm...
What do you mean "hmm"?
That's it! Toraji-san, please help me find out what's up with her!
She's actually a good person, so I'm worried.
- Then pay her. - I told you I can't.
Okay? I'm going to call her right now.
Why don't you ask her yourself?
It'd be awkward!
That's why I can't. I've never succeeded
in subtly asking about something important.
Bro!
What are you doing here?
Oh, well...
Yo.
So you sell clothes?
You're two years younger than me, right?
I go to college. My pops says that even yakuza should graduate from college.
- Is this profitable? - What do you mean?
I guess it's more money than a rakugoka...
Do your best and pay off that debt.
Hey Ginjiro, buy something.
- There's nothing here that-- - Who the hell cares?
This sucks.
I'll buy something.
Don't force yourself.
- How much is all this? - I said forget about it!
I don't want someone as lame as you wearing them.
What?
LOOKING FOR WAITRESSES
Hello?
I don't think I can make it.
What? What happened?
I just took some sleeping pills.
I totally wrecked my friend's car,
and I need 200 thousand yen to fix it. I wanna die...
- Don't die over something like that! - Then bring me the money.
What? But I'm...
Just take money from the register again.
I'm just joking.
It's just that you're the only one I can depend on in such times.
Three years since Kuma stopped drinking,
he was a skilled worker, so he got some regular customers and...
In the year when he finally managed to pay back all his debts...
Oh right. New Year's Eve.
He went around visiting customers and stopped at a bathhou--
I think it'd be faster if you just read...
Anyway, what happens is his wife confesses
that she hid the wallet that Kuma found three years ago.
Boss?
You there?
Why am I not surprised...
Is this for real?
"Dear, does this wallet look familiar?"
"Yeah, it does."
"It's the wallet that you found three years ago."
"I thought it was just a dream."
"I tricked you and said it was just a dream."
"You can hit me as you please."
"Don't be silly! Me hit you?
I'll break my hand!"
Bro, have you seen my wallet?
No!
I had it when I was going to buy the clothes in Urahara...
Just shut up.
I'm getting to the good part.
See, you made me lose my place.
I think that's enough.
I'll look for it.
Basically,
the wife tricked her husband to make him quit drinking and become a hard worker.
Exactly.
It's definitely a good story.
But reality is not that simple.
Why not?
My husband works in an office.
He doesn't have any special skills like a fisherman.
Even when he wants to work, the company goes under...
He has to worry about his pride and how society views him.
It's not like he can get just any job.
Can't imagine where I'll be three years from now.
So what I'm saying is,
I realized that people now can't relate to this story.
Teach me another one.
Teach you another story? It's not that easy.
Don't worry. With skills, even classics can be relatable.
- You're not convincing. - Shut up, four-eyes.
You look like an office worker! Hey Kotora, what's your favorite movie?
The King of Minami.
- Anything else? -Home Alone.
Oh wow, I wasn't expecting that one.
That's fiction, right?
Rakugo stories are fiction too.
You were never attacked
by some scary men while you were alone as a kid.
- I was. - Really?
Someone was avoiding paying back his debts, so I went in his house.
- But there was only a kid... - The agressor?
It's non-fiction after all. What shall we do?
Hey Kotora, how did you feel after hearing my rendition of Shibahama?
I cried, laughed and was touched.
What a short and quick reflection. Like prime-minister, Koizumi!
What part of that story tugged at your heartstrings the most?
The part where he calls his wife a goddess?
All right. Forget everything else.
Forget?
You don't have the ability
to memorize and tell the entire story yet.
So instead of complicating things,
put everything you've got into that one emotional part.
That way, no matter if it's an office worker or what,
the audience will understand.
Master.
Yeah?
You're a great coach.
Well, then let's get started.
"You were absolutely right!
No matter how much 50 ryo is, I could use it up in a flash!
Thank you for tricking me.
Thanks to you, I've come to my senses. And can now spend a debt-free New Year's.
Thank you so much.
You're a goddess."
"You don't need to bow to me."
"Here, have a drink."
I think he's actually going to be able to finish today.
-"I quit drinking." - There he goes.
"I promised I wouldn't drink anymore."
"It's all right now. You're no longer a man who is controlled by alcohol."
Who is that? It's the best part!
Turn the damned thing off!
- He's up here telling a love story... - Hello?
He's answering it?
Where are you? We were meeting at 4:30 p.m.
Sorry, I'm in the middle of a perfor--
- Does it have to be now? - Of course it does!
I've had it!
It's weird just the two of us. The place isn't even open.
Got disconnected.
Idiot...
Sorry about that.
I'll put it on mute next time.
So where was I?
"Is it really alright?"
This is ridiculous!
You ruined it.
"No, I can't.
I will no longer drink alcohol!"
"Why not?"
Why would someone turn in a wallet in Asakusa if you dropped it in Harajuku?
I said that I might have dropped it in Harajuku!
I may have dropped it in Asakusa for all I know!
I have such bad taste in men!
So you are at least aware of that.
When it hits me, I'll fall for him
whether he's an old man or even a kid!
What about me? My wife just ran out on me, so I'm currently single.
I get possessive and I can't hold my self back
I have to be clingy to feel like it's a relationship.
I love clingy girls.
Read the room! She's ignoring you to be nice!
So you like sex, huh?
He's even more insensitive!
Well, without sex I feel insecure.
Ta-chan, Ta-chan.
- I love you! - Who the hell asked you?
You're still young, so why cling to one guy?
Is there anything else you love besides men?
Drinking!
You've been drinking a lot since we got here.
Drinking, guys, text messaging, karaoke, The Untouchables,
milk pudding...
and clothes.
Oh, clothes...
If you love clothes, why can't you think of your clothes as a boyfriend?
What?
Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for...
It's understandable, especially with your clothes.
Shut up! You shut up already!
Okay, if a guy really loves you,
he would never do anything to interfere with your life.
He'd never tell you to quit or skip your job.
- Really? - They're just taking advantage of you!
They're using you! Wake up and smell the coffee already!
Find a normal guy to date while working.
It shouldn't be that hard.
Yeah, I know.
Here, drink up. If you keep waiting, the perfect guy will come along.
A kind, rich, and understanding guy.
Right! I just need to live my life and I'll be able to meet him!
The perfect guy that understands me, has a kind heart, and has money.
- And is hot! - I never said he should be hot.
You opened my eyes! Boss, you seem like such an adult today!
An adult would pay--
Shut up! I'll pay her eventually!
Seriously! This guy's so tight with money! So stupid!
All right.
I'm sorry
for making you come with me.
Don't worry about it. Everything turned out to be okay.
Let's make a toast.
Cheers!
Oh, I've been meaning to ask you...
What?
Why don't you do rakugo?
Give me a break...
I'm not saying this 'cause I'm drunk.
You told Shibahama so well it gave me goosebumps.
It seemed fresh and the tempo was nice and fast.
It's such a waste of talent.
Oh hey. If it isn't Kotatsu...
Hey. What are you guys doing? Drinking without paying?
- Did my old man ask you to do this? - Hey!
Well, if I go back home, my old man'll be able to pay off the debt.
And then you could quit being a yakuza.
That's not--
Sorry, but...
I ain't like your little bro who obediently listens to his dad.
Sorry.
Are you all right?
Yes.
- Can I help you with something? - I found a wallet.
What?
Can I see it real quick?
Officer, this is my wallet!
- Really? - I'm serious!
I'm so relieved! Thanks so much!
I would have been in deep shit without this!
Thanks so much!
Thank you so much! You saved my life!
You know...
Do you enjoy selling clothes?
Of course! I'm doing it because I want to.
Oh, I see. That's good, then.
What is it? Spit it out.
Well...
You're always so irritable at the store.
I thought you're just running away from rakugo.
From rakugo... or maybe your father.
If i'm wrong...
Is it that great to do something that you truly love?
What?
If you begin hating the thing you were once passionate about,
you just have to find something new.
Actually, I should be the one asking you if you really like rakugo.
- I do it because I enjoy it. - Is that so?
I think you just stumbled on it at a time when you were tired of being a yakuza.
It's easy for you.
If you can't make it, you can go back to being a yakuza.
It's not like you're related to your teacher or boss.
Well, it's different for me.
Unlike you, I won't do things in a half-assed way.
If I'm going back, I have to be ready to put my all into it.
To be frank,
a yakuza like you'll never make it--
What the hell do you know about me?
Pay for the damages!
This isn't enough!
Oh my! Father farted!
That wasn't me, it was Donta.
Well, let's see now...
No, Mom! We all eat the same things. You can't smell the difference.
What a great family! Isn't this so much fun?
Well, now it's my turn!
Just how close are you guys? Where's Kotora?
Oh, I thought he was with you.
He's not back from going to see you.
Oh.
Wait, stupid!
- What's your problem, you dirty comedian? - Fix this.
Donta, stop.
This is just as much my house as it is yours.
I'm not telling you this as a comedian, but as the eldest brother.
Put this back together within five seconds! Five, four, three...
What the hell do you think you're doing? Ow! Jenga!
Hey, did something happen with Kotora?
None of your business.
It's my business. He's one of my precious pupils.
I won't let you do anything to him.
That man has gone through so much hardship,
unlike you!
He was only twelve
when he saw his parents die right in front of him!
They committed suicide because of debt.
It was so traumatic that he forgot how to smile since then.
When he had no place to go,
no parents or money,
Shinjuku Ryuseikai took him under their wing.
It's not like he became a yakuza because he wanted to.
That's the only choice he had!
Well, that guy...
has listened to my stories...
and cracked a smile!
He laughed and ow!
Jenga? Jenga?
He bade farewell to his gang's boss, who was his savior.
And came here asking...
to be my apprentice.
I turned him down at first because it seemed like too much trouble.
I know I'm not a good person,
but he wouldn't take no for an answer.
If that's not determination, I don't know what is.
He's totally different from you.
He's not some half-baked punk!
He's such a lonely man.
You left this house to be on your own,
but you still come back sometimes...
Acting all big, and then hurting others
without even realizing it.
If you keep this up,
in the end, you'll...
be ignored by everyone.
Okay?
The end to a lonely man's life
is his lonely death.
How could you...
What?
How could you say all that to your real son?
A real son
wouldn't do anything like that to his real father!
Father, stop!
Stop!
You're making Mother cry!
Sayuri-chan.
Oh no! I'm so sorry!
I keep telling you not to make Sayuri-chan cry!
- It wasn't me! - Who made her cry?
I'm asking you a question!
Huh?
Ryuhei?
- Ryuhei? - Sorry.
- Ryuhei? - He fainted.
- I used too much strength. - Hurry and help.
I'm sorry!
I finally found him!
Yeah, yeah.
He's handsome and shiny all over. He's amazing!
- That's good. - It's thanks to you.
- What is? - Were you not listening?
- You haven't said anything. - I'm quitting.
What?
I found that rich, hot guy! He's great! He's a bit rebellious.
He wears a jacket with a tiger and dragon on the back.
Take it easy.
What jacket?
What the hell are we going to do?
What's wrong?
What should we do, Tora? This is terrible!
Tora! I thought I told you to keep an eye on him!
What the hell did you do?
The boss's predictions came true...
What were you doing?
You stupid...
The tour guide...
They are all my boyfriends...
Hey! Who do you think you are, getting all these guys to get tattoos for you?
All right! To your right is the Fujin.
To the left is...
Mr. Storyteller?
Shut up and come with me!
- But I'm working. - Just come here.
I just couldn't forget my life in Tokyo, after all.
I'm ashamed to admit that I just had to come back.
My husband gets nervous when I'm at home,
and I didn't want to go back to working at bars...
Because it would drive men crazy again.
I figured that young men would never ride a tour bus...
And I'm used to handling the elderly after--
I don't care about how you became a tour guide.
- How the hell did you guys meet? - On the tour bus!
Yeah, the tour bus!
Step outside for a second.
I'm so glad that I didn't keep that wallet.
God must have rewarded me for it.
He must have felt so sorry for me.
Did you get his number?
No, but I gave him my e-mail address.
Did he e-mail you yet?
Not yet.
Are you sure you weren't...
dreaming this?
Huh?
Think of it as a dream, and forget about it.
What? But she's right there!
You were so drunk last night.
We were talking about guys, so I bet you had a dream like that...
Don't be stupid! I shook his hand!
I'm telling you it was a dream!
What about the wallet? I found it right here!
You turned it in to the police,
but then dreamed up the guy in the jacket.
No way!
Do you remember how you got home from there?
Um...
See! I told you it was all a dream!
That's what you get for thinking about guys all the time!
Get back to work!
Put all these lame clothes out.
She may be a jewel,
but because of that, there are a whole lot of other guys after her...
Just like pigeons getting excited over bird feed.
You're just one of those pigeons.
Bro...
I know five other guys, no six,
that have that same tattoo that you do.
You wanna be a pigeon,
huh, Ginjiro?
You ain't like me.
You're the heir to the Shinjuku Ryuseikai.
I'm telling you this as your older bro. Don't be some guy
who gets bossed around by a woman. Be a man who bosses around women.
Okay.
Good.
Where'd Gin-chan go?
I made him leave.
Sorry, but I ain't letting some mysterious woman like you around him.
What do you mean?
He's a yakuza,
and the future leader of our group, at that.
I'm an underling for them and his "educator."
Got that?
Don't see him again.
Are you restraining me?
Restraining you?
I don't really care. When can I see you again?
- Me? - Yes, you. When?
What do you mean? This has nothing to do with our discussion.
Then what's your cell number?
What's up with you?
What is it?
Tell me!
What's your number?
Tiger, tiger, jirettaiga!
Here's a comedic story for you...
But before I start, please turn off your--.
Don't tell us that!
There was once a young storekeeper called Ryu.
Do you all remember him?
The stupid guy that engraved
some vixen's name into his skin.
Well, there was a girl named Risa who worked at his store.
She's a good girl but prone to falling in love at the drop of a hat.
She gets suckered in by anyone she finds attractive,
be it old man or baby.
Well, she coincidentally meets a yakuza named Ginjiro,
an old acquaintance of Ryu.
NO NEW MAIL
Ryu figured that Risa would forget all about work again,
so he convinced her that it was all just a bad dream...
I think you were right, Boss.
It was all a dream, wasn't it?
I've decided to believe that. I'll stay away from men for a while.
Time to get back to work! Where should I put this up, Boss?
Over there.
Okay!
Boss, is this tomorrow's inventory? I'll take care of it.
All right.
Ah!
Hello! Let me know if you find anything you like.
We have dressing rooms.
She was working so hard now that Ryu started feeling bad...
Oh, Boss. Regarding the sale--
Shut up with the "Boss!"
What are you doing, Boss?
Just watch the store while I'm gone!
So, Ryu decided to go straight to Ginjiro to negotiate.
You said you would buy all this, right?
Yeah, I did.
You said you wanted them bad and you'd buy them, right?
I never said I wanted them bad.
Hey... aren't you Donbei's son?
Buy it all! I'll give it all to you for 100 thousand yen.
Please buy them.
- You buy some too! - Who'd want these lame clothes!
I don't know what happened between you and my son,
but your old man owes me four million yen!
- Why would I buy this? - This isn't about my father!
I'm talking to your son right now.
That...
What?
Oh, this?
I just thought it would be cool...
Oh, I see.
Later.
Wait, the money?
Oh yeah.
I want you to bring it over to the store later.
- Why? - There's an envelope inside the bag.
Put it in that and bring it over.
Without a clue of what was going on, Ginjiro brought the envelope
with the 100 thousand yen to the store.
"Excuse me!"
Welcome!
Oh, you work here?
Um, the owner of this store made me buy a whole bunch of clothes yesterday,
here's...
the money.
FEBRUARY'S SALARY
I don't get it at all...
I'll be waiting
for your e-mail.
I can wait for however long.
It's true.
I'm used to being controlled by men.
Oops... what am I saying?
Thank you for your purchase!
Can you give me your e-mail again?
Huh?
See... You were drunk last time, weren't you?
I couldn't read it at all.
Okay!
A woman that wants to be controlled, and a man that wants to be in control.
The criteria couldn't fit any better!
To hire such a fine young lady without paying her is cruel.
So Ryu even made the choice of presenting her with a big break...
Order anything you like!
It's my treat tonight.
Um... Risa.
Huh?
My friend owns a store in Shibuya.
It's an import goods store and they're shorthanded on people...
If you want...
I won't quit.
I want to work at Dragon Soda for a bit longer. I love clothes.
- Can I get a shochu? - Okay.
Sorry, I have to run a few errands.
Stay and drink all you like.
Yeah, there's a particular opening act that I can't miss.
I'm sorry.
For what?
For a lot of things. I have to apologize before I get beat up by you again.
"Me? Hit you, boss?
Don't be silly! I would break my hand!"
After all, I owe it to you for hooking me up with Gin-gin.
And if you hadn't tricked me,
then I would have been clingy again.
I would have scared Gin-gin away.
"You're a god.
Thank you for tricking me!"
No matter how hot Gin-gin may be,
it would all go down the drain if he hated me.
I'm going to treasure him, so this time, he won't get away...
I mean, I'm going to have him treasure me.
Risa...
You call him Gin-gin?
Yup, I call him Gin-gin!
I see.
I see! Okay! Let's drink!
Alright!
- Actually, I won't drink after all. - Why?
"I wouldn't want it to become a dream again."
Good job, Yakuza!
Hey there newbie, you missed a pigeon feather.
Hey!
I've been working here through Kotora's introduction.
Really?
Do your best, and pay back that debt!
Wait!
Gin-gin! Wait for me!
You're too slow!
Here's your meat sauce spaghetti!
Well, Kotora,
you messed up most of the original form of Shibahama,
but the audience sure liked it. So, I think you did a good job.
Thank you, sir.
Well, here's this month's lesson fee.
All right. It's all here.
Thank you so much. I will be repaying this--
Can't you put in in an envelope?
Yes sir, I'll remember to prepare one next time.
I will. I'm sorry. I'll leave it right here.
Well, Kotora, that storekeeper
named Ryu that came up in--
That's none of your concern!
Still in collector mode?
I heard that your Shibahama went well. Risa told me.
Yeah, I guess you could say so...
I'm happy for you.
Yeah, thanks.
I need to apologize for last time...
- I didn't know. - Don't worry about it.
Okay. See you.
What's the big rush?
Well... it is awkward and this is a love hotel.
Tora-chan!
Oh? Have we met before?