1
00:00:04,047 --> 00:00:07,316
(心醉)

2
00:00:11,988 --> 00:00:15,124
(小虎)

3
00:00:23,433 --> 00:00:24,300
嗯...

4
00:00:25,001 --> 00:00:27,870
開始之前
我想先講一個愚蠢的小故事

5
00:00:27,870 --> 00:00:30,506
主要是關於我自己的故事

6
00:00:30,973 --> 00:00:31,774
請收我做弟子!

7
00:00:31,774 --> 00:00:33,109
今年年初

8
00:00:33,109 --> 00:00:36,512
我意外地成為了
林屋亭屯兵衛大師的弟子

9
00:00:36,512 --> 00:00:38,815
他慷慨地賜了我藝名,小虎

10
00:00:38,815 --> 00:00:44,287
然而我還有個不太光采的身分

11
00:00:44,754 --> 00:00:49,926
我是新宿流星會的黑幫成員

12
00:00:49,926 --> 00:00:51,694
我已經為他們幹了十年

13
00:00:51,694 --> 00:00:54,330
用落語來作比喻,我也算是個師父

14
00:00:54,330 --> 00:00:57,300
我白天是個說書人
晚上是個黑幫分子

15
00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:59,001
就是這麼回事

16
00:00:59,001 --> 00:01:00,269
我的弟兄們

17
00:01:00,937 --> 00:01:04,373
稱我為“落語界的化身博士”

18
00:01:06,542 --> 00:01:10,513
這是我的黑社會老大
新宿流星會黑幫的頭目

19
00:01:10,513 --> 00:01:14,383
他借給高爾夫球友400萬日元
在這筆錢收回來之前

20
00:01:14,383 --> 00:01:15,885
我無法金盆洗手

21
00:01:16,385 --> 00:01:19,188
而他那位高爾夫球友...

22
00:01:19,689 --> 00:01:20,523
就是這個人

23
00:01:21,491 --> 00:01:23,659
這是一種威脅人的新手法,對嗎?

24
00:01:24,227 --> 00:01:25,128
什麼意思?

25
00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:27,630
“什麼意思”...不好意思

26
00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:31,868
我的意思是 你們老大

27
00:01:32,468 --> 00:01:37,273
派你來威脅我

28
00:01:37,273 --> 00:01:41,244
如果你同意教我落語
你教我一個段子,我就給你十萬日元

29
00:01:41,244 --> 00:01:44,247
你想讓我用這筆錢還債?

30
00:01:44,247 --> 00:01:45,314
有問題嗎?

31
00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:48,017
已經兩個月了

32
00:01:48,985 --> 00:01:51,821
可是你一個段子也沒記住...

33
00:01:52,421 --> 00:01:55,691
喂,我覺得是你教得不好

34
00:01:56,893 --> 00:01:57,793
什麼?

35
00:01:57,793 --> 00:01:58,961
就比如打棒球

36
00:01:59,629 --> 00:02:02,765
棒球打得好也不一定會教人

37
00:02:02,765 --> 00:02:04,934
也就是說你根本不會教人

38
00:02:05,568 --> 00:02:07,470
所以你兒子才離開你

39
00:02:08,738 --> 00:02:10,106
請問這個...

40
00:02:11,274 --> 00:02:14,277
虎與浦原龍?這東西就我們這裡有

41
00:02:14,277 --> 00:02:15,945
有純色的嗎?

42
00:02:15,945 --> 00:02:19,315
最好是沒有網眼的,這裡有嗎?

43
00:02:21,184 --> 00:02:25,655
如果是純色不帶網眼的
那不就是普通的T恤了嗎?

44
00:02:26,556 --> 00:02:27,890
-店長!
-什麼?

45
00:02:28,491 --> 00:02:32,128
剛才我去付商店租金
但賬上只有315日元了

46
00:02:32,828 --> 00:02:36,132
嘟囔什麼呢!我本來是想幫你墊付

47
00:02:36,132 --> 00:02:38,701
但你已經三個月沒給我發薪水了

48
00:02:38,701 --> 00:02:39,535
是,我知道...

49
00:02:40,069 --> 00:02:43,172
你花了400萬日元去驕縱你兒子

50
00:02:43,172 --> 00:02:45,007
你不覺得這很蠢嗎?

51
00:02:45,541 --> 00:02:46,576
啊?

52
00:02:46,576 --> 00:02:49,812
如果他成為一名落語家
不就沒這些麻煩事了嗎?

53
00:02:49,812 --> 00:02:50,446
是...

54
00:02:50,446 --> 00:02:51,881
你真的了解狀況嗎?

55
00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:54,984
我們昨天只賣了一個打火機!

56
00:02:55,585 --> 00:02:59,956
算我拜託你,讓別人來設計衣服吧
你專心賣東西就好了

57
00:02:59,956 --> 00:03:02,258
我知道,你說得對

58
00:03:02,258 --> 00:03:04,727
別再讓他賣那些破衣服了

59
00:03:05,361 --> 00:03:07,129
那樣你才能把錢還清

60
00:03:08,397 --> 00:03:10,499
別再提錢了,妳個醜女

61
00:03:10,499 --> 00:03:13,869
這麼想要錢
那就去做陪酒小姐或者妓女啊!

62
00:03:13,869 --> 00:03:15,438
反正也沒男人要妳

63
00:03:15,438 --> 00:03:17,773
我知道!我不需要你來告訴我!

64
00:03:17,773 --> 00:03:20,910
你以為你是誰,還自以為很了解我?

65
00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:23,012
我兒子是個落語天才

66
00:03:23,012 --> 00:03:25,715
像你這樣的小混混永遠比不上他!

67
00:03:25,715 --> 00:03:29,652
有本事你上台落語,去逗觀眾笑啊?

68
00:03:31,220 --> 00:03:33,122
我就這樣被臭駡一頓...

69
00:03:33,856 --> 00:03:36,025
於是現在我坐在各位面前

70
00:03:38,327 --> 00:03:39,161
言歸正傳

71
00:03:39,895 --> 00:03:41,330
現在開始進入正題

72
00:03:43,833 --> 00:03:46,636
虎與龍!

73
00:04:02,952 --> 00:04:03,986
各位!

74
00:04:03,986 --> 00:04:06,255
大家買完紀念品了嗎?

75
00:04:06,756 --> 00:04:08,591
買好了!

76
00:04:08,591 --> 00:04:10,493
還有人要去洗手間嗎?

77
00:04:10,493 --> 00:04:13,029
不用了!

78
00:04:13,029 --> 00:04:14,230
什麼?

79
00:04:14,230 --> 00:04:15,164
妳好!

80
00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:19,268
你上週六有參加這個旅行團吧?

81
00:04:19,268 --> 00:04:20,836
週日也在

82
00:04:20,836 --> 00:04:23,005
是的!我很喜歡巴士旅行!

83
00:04:23,005 --> 00:04:24,607
勝鬨橋太好玩了!

84
00:04:24,607 --> 00:04:26,809
三越本店也是!

85
00:04:26,809 --> 00:04:28,878
我們要出發了,奶奶!

86
00:04:28,878 --> 00:04:31,080
走快點,妳這個老太婆

87
00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:32,848
能不能好好聽導遊的話?

88
00:04:32,848 --> 00:04:33,849
小心我弄死妳啊!

89
00:04:33,849 --> 00:04:35,418
他不會弄死妳的

90
00:04:35,918 --> 00:04:38,587
好了,各位!我們出發!

91
00:04:38,587 --> 00:04:39,355
好!

92
00:04:39,355 --> 00:04:42,191
哇,這些都是吉祥的名字!

93
00:04:43,192 --> 00:04:45,094
我們把這些都用上!

94
00:04:45,094 --> 00:04:48,030
和尚提議過的名字
他們全幫小孩取名了

95
00:04:49,565 --> 00:04:52,435
“喂!壽無限壽無限,五世不全...”

96
00:04:52,435 --> 00:04:53,969
是“不盡”,不是“不全”

97
00:04:54,537 --> 00:04:56,205
對...不盡

98
00:04:57,740 --> 00:05:01,777
“喂!壽無限壽無限五世不盡
海砂利水魚奶油燉菜”

99
00:05:01,777 --> 00:05:04,680
“奶油燉菜”是什麼東西?

100
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:06,849
喂,閉嘴,我都搞混了

101
00:05:08,551 --> 00:05:12,321
“海砂利水魚水行末雲來末風來末

102
00:05:12,321 --> 00:05:14,357
食衣住行都不缺

103
00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:17,293
紫金牛水行末雲來末風來末...”

104
00:05:17,293 --> 00:05:18,194
等等

105
00:05:21,163 --> 00:05:25,134
“食衣住行都不缺紫金牛

106
00:05:25,134 --> 00:05:28,337
水行末雲來末風來末
食衣住行都不缺...”

107
00:05:28,337 --> 00:05:29,071
等等

108
00:05:30,005 --> 00:05:31,240
怎麼一直在重複

109
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:35,211
煩死了!是“朋泊那和朋泊皮”!

110
00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:38,848
不是,是“朋泊皮和朋泊那”

111
00:05:38,848 --> 00:05:41,784
你怎麼記不對呢?
就是“朋泊那和朋泊皮”!

112
00:05:41,784 --> 00:05:43,953
-誰在乎啊?
-我們在乎!

113
00:05:43,953 --> 00:05:47,790
“壽無限壽無限五世不盡
海砂利水魚奶油燉菜”

114
00:05:47,790 --> 00:05:48,991
錯了!

115
00:05:48,991 --> 00:05:50,726
-那...
-再試一次

116
00:05:50,726 --> 00:05:52,995
“壽無限壽無限五世不全...”

117
00:05:52,995 --> 00:05:54,597
錯了!

118
00:05:54,597 --> 00:05:56,499
我們回來了!

119
00:05:56,499 --> 00:05:57,400
你們好!

120
00:05:58,701 --> 00:06:00,002
你是誰?

121
00:06:00,002 --> 00:06:01,103
他是我小弟

122
00:06:01,103 --> 00:06:03,939
白痴,我告訴過你
不要每次都來接我!

123
00:06:03,939 --> 00:06:05,608
這裡是好人家

124
00:06:05,608 --> 00:06:07,176
沒關係!

125
00:06:07,176 --> 00:06:09,278
他這麼大的時候我就認識他了!

126
00:06:09,278 --> 00:06:10,913
你現在上幾年級了?

127
00:06:10,913 --> 00:06:11,781
幾年級?

128
00:06:11,781 --> 00:06:14,283
我現在上四年級了!
我沒告訴過你嗎?

129
00:06:16,552 --> 00:06:17,553
沒有

130
00:06:18,454 --> 00:06:19,321
你是

131
00:06:20,556 --> 00:06:21,457
大學生嗎?

132
00:06:21,457 --> 00:06:22,658
是的!主修商業!

133
00:06:22,658 --> 00:06:26,796
老爹告訴我,現在的日本黑幫
都應該有大學文憑

134
00:06:26,796 --> 00:06:27,530
你的老爹?

135
00:06:27,530 --> 00:06:30,733
最近銀次郎怪怪的

136
00:06:30,733 --> 00:06:31,600
怎麼?

137
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:34,303
他早上起得很早

138
00:06:35,871 --> 00:06:39,208
晚上7、8點就回家了

139
00:06:39,975 --> 00:06:41,410
而且還帶回來了紀念品

140
00:06:42,378 --> 00:06:45,347
像是雷公餅、人形燒...

141
00:06:46,048 --> 00:06:48,117
這對我來說正常的...

142
00:06:48,117 --> 00:06:52,021
白痴!少爺是新宿流星會的接班人!

143
00:06:52,955 --> 00:06:55,191
他只能和門當戶對的女人在一起

144
00:06:55,925 --> 00:06:56,759
女人?

145
00:06:56,759 --> 00:06:59,128
就是情人,山崎

146
00:06:59,728 --> 00:07:01,764
給我看著點那小子!

147
00:07:01,764 --> 00:07:04,867
那孩子跟我一樣,容易感情用事

148
00:07:04,867 --> 00:07:09,738
他可能會把女人名字紋在身上
或者在小弟弟上穿個珍珠

149
00:07:09,738 --> 00:07:10,806
真的嗎?

150
00:07:10,806 --> 00:07:13,943
我有一處很大的紋身
紋了女人的名字,就在...

151
00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:15,911
不說我的事情了

152
00:07:15,911 --> 00:07:18,147
看好少爺,阿虎!

153
00:07:18,781 --> 00:07:20,783
你是負責教育少爺的

154
00:07:21,984 --> 00:07:23,853
找機會試探下什麼情況

155
00:07:24,487 --> 00:07:26,155
對了,落語賺錢嗎?

156
00:07:26,755 --> 00:07:29,091
有利可圖嗎?一天能賺幾萬?

157
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:30,493
幾萬?

158
00:07:30,493 --> 00:07:33,229
說墊場戲的薪資已定好
第一年1000日元

159
00:07:33,229 --> 00:07:34,897
第二年1200日元,然後...

160
00:07:34,897 --> 00:07:35,631
就這麼點!

161
00:07:35,631 --> 00:07:39,335
-一天就1000日元能活嗎?
-他們倒是包吃...

162
00:07:39,335 --> 00:07:41,303
我們第二等的最辛苦

163
00:07:41,303 --> 00:07:43,772
我們不能像說墊場戲的一樣
每天都表演

164
00:07:43,772 --> 00:07:45,207
所以只能做兼職

165
00:07:45,207 --> 00:07:45,941
兼職?

166
00:07:45,941 --> 00:07:47,276
你還有別的工作嗎?

167
00:07:47,276 --> 00:07:48,544
我不喜歡上電視...

168
00:07:48,544 --> 00:07:50,746
你這張臉永遠上不了電視

169
00:07:50,746 --> 00:07:53,883
媽媽,打開電視,他上電視了!

170
00:07:53,883 --> 00:07:58,153
錢不是一切,銀次郎

171
00:07:58,153 --> 00:08:01,590
是像這樣和師兄們吃一鍋飯

172
00:08:01,590 --> 00:08:02,758
一起學習練功

173
00:08:02,758 --> 00:08:06,328
-樂得自在,對吧,媽媽?
-她不是你媽媽!

174
00:08:06,328 --> 00:08:09,398
我以前很欣賞你就像一匹孤狼

175
00:08:09,398 --> 00:08:10,132
什麼?

176
00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:12,167
但你現在沒那種魅力了

177
00:08:12,167 --> 00:08:14,169
與其說像孤狼...

178
00:08:16,639 --> 00:08:17,473
不如說像鴿子!

179
00:08:18,007 --> 00:08:20,342
一個吃了一袋廉價的種子
就興奮的人!

180
00:08:20,342 --> 00:08:21,544
你們都聽到了嗎?

181
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:24,246
他說我們像鴿子!沒人反擊嗎?

182
00:08:25,748 --> 00:08:29,151
-鴿子是和平的象徵!
-算了吧!還是看電視吧

183
00:08:29,151 --> 00:08:32,421
太燙了!

184
00:08:32,421 --> 00:08:33,689
不行!

185
00:08:33,689 --> 00:08:36,425
關鍵是不要立即跳入水中

186
00:08:36,425 --> 00:08:40,195
這樣就可以讓觀眾感覺到水有多燙

187
00:08:40,195 --> 00:08:42,131
學到了!真的學到了!

188
00:08:42,131 --> 00:08:43,632
屯太...

189
00:08:43,632 --> 00:08:44,366
來吧!

190
00:08:44,366 --> 00:08:45,901
{\an8}(極限中隊耐力遊騎兵)

191
00:08:47,169 --> 00:08:48,270
喂!媽媽...

192
00:08:50,839 --> 00:08:52,675
你好,少爺...

193
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,243
小虎?

194
00:08:54,243 --> 00:08:54,944
怎麼了?

195
00:08:54,944 --> 00:08:56,478
喂,裝什麼酷!

196
00:08:56,478 --> 00:08:59,014
你不能這樣跟師父說話

197
00:08:59,014 --> 00:09:02,184
-我想到個適合你的完美段子
-是什麼?

198
00:09:02,184 --> 00:09:03,986
還是這麼沒禮貌

199
00:09:03,986 --> 00:09:05,220
別激動

200
00:09:05,220 --> 00:09:07,790
這個段子叫《芝濱》

201
00:09:07,790 --> 00:09:11,360
是關於一對負債累累情侶的愛情故事

202
00:09:12,227 --> 00:09:14,663
討債是你的強項,對吧?

203
00:09:14,663 --> 00:09:16,131
那可不行!

204
00:09:16,131 --> 00:09:17,866
連我都沒學過

205
00:09:17,866 --> 00:09:20,269
我來教你《芝濱》!

206
00:09:20,269 --> 00:09:23,305
芝濱...

207
00:09:23,839 --> 00:09:27,142
晚安,我是小森野芝濱

208
00:09:28,277 --> 00:09:29,745
怎麼樣?

209
00:09:33,315 --> 00:09:36,552
總之我明天會在臺上表演這個段子
你記得看仔細了

210
00:09:39,688 --> 00:09:41,290
《芝濱》...

211
00:09:41,290 --> 00:09:42,625
喂,太太

212
00:09:43,492 --> 00:09:46,328
這連利息都不夠

213
00:09:46,328 --> 00:09:47,630
妳明白的吧?

214
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:48,764
就是

215
00:09:49,431 --> 00:09:51,533
利息只有區區百分之三

216
00:09:52,935 --> 00:09:57,172
既然妳丈夫不行,那就看妳的了

217
00:09:57,172 --> 00:10:01,210
就是!作為他的妻子
妳應該靠發面紙賺錢...

218
00:10:03,579 --> 00:10:06,515
不管怎樣,我們不能再等一天了

219
00:10:06,915 --> 00:10:09,184
所以去向親戚借點錢什麼的

220
00:10:09,184 --> 00:10:13,255
也許妳的親戚能借你錢
這樣“親測”簡單些

221
00:10:15,024 --> 00:10:17,026
“親測”簡單些

222
00:10:18,193 --> 00:10:19,561
閉嘴吧你!

223
00:10:20,129 --> 00:10:23,032
當黑社會就專心當黑社會

224
00:10:23,766 --> 00:10:24,967
而且一點也不好笑

225
00:10:25,567 --> 00:10:26,235
白痴!

226
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:30,572
從現在開始,就算出去收錢
也要有腦子,對吧,太太?

227
00:10:30,572 --> 00:10:33,642
現在就算是黑社會
也需要幽默感,對吧?

228
00:10:33,642 --> 00:10:36,378
不管怎樣,今天我只能拿出這些...

229
00:10:39,014 --> 00:10:40,416
妳以為我跟妳鬧著玩嗎?

230
00:10:51,927 --> 00:10:52,861
喂,銀次郎

231
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:53,762
怎麼了?

232
00:10:56,165 --> 00:11:00,369
你現在有女...

233
00:11:00,369 --> 00:11:04,273
女朋友什麼的嗎?

234
00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:06,842
我有喜歡的女孩

235
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,546
是...誰呀?

236
00:11:11,113 --> 00:11:12,314
她是巴士導遊

237
00:11:13,816 --> 00:11:18,954
她知道你的感受嗎
還是她也喜歡你?

238
00:11:19,688 --> 00:11:20,522
大哥

239
00:11:20,522 --> 00:11:21,657
怎麼了?

240
00:11:21,657 --> 00:11:24,626
問這個幹什麼?多難為情

241
00:11:24,626 --> 00:11:25,694
白痴

242
00:11:26,261 --> 00:11:30,599
身為你的大哥,我有責任多了解你

243
00:11:30,599 --> 00:11:34,036
如果我們繼續這個話題
我會認為你是同性戀!

244
00:11:34,036 --> 00:11:36,205
-什麼?
-開個玩笑罷了

245
00:11:36,705 --> 00:11:39,041
我告訴過你我不懂笑話!

246
00:11:39,041 --> 00:11:42,578
好...太危險了

247
00:11:42,578 --> 00:11:45,013
擔心什麼!聽我說!

248
00:11:46,181 --> 00:11:47,116
歡迎光臨

249
00:11:47,616 --> 00:11:49,218
{\an8}(致林屋亭屯兵衛大師)

250
00:11:49,218 --> 00:11:50,886
(日間表演:林屋亭屯兵衛)

251
00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:06,535
-可算來了
-屯兵衛先生!

252
00:12:07,035 --> 00:12:09,438
(林屋亭屯兵衛)

253
00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:10,773
嗯...

254
00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:15,310
和平常一樣,我準備了個段子
來歡迎各位觀眾

255
00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:20,382
人們常說,江戶時代的人
從來沒有多餘的錢

256
00:12:21,383 --> 00:12:22,951
他今天要講《芝濱》!

257
00:12:22,951 --> 00:12:26,955
他們覺得有必要
在一天之內用完所有的錢

258
00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:29,858
最近流傳的那些騙局

259
00:12:30,893 --> 00:12:34,897
是絕對騙不了江戶人的

260
00:12:36,165 --> 00:12:42,304
就像這樣:“你好...是我...”

261
00:12:42,304 --> 00:12:44,907
“你是誰?這裡是江戶...”

262
00:12:44,907 --> 00:12:46,975
“是我呀!”

263
00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:52,648
-“是你!好,有事嗎?”
-“我出了點事

264
00:12:52,648 --> 00:12:56,018
需要一筆錢

265
00:12:56,018 --> 00:12:59,388
你幫我轉到我的帳戶吧?”

266
00:12:59,388 --> 00:13:02,157
“真不巧!你應該昨晚打電話給我

267
00:13:02,157 --> 00:13:05,661
當時我在賽馬場贏了500萬日元

268
00:13:06,195 --> 00:13:10,799
已經太晚了,我已經沒有錢了!
去問別人吧!”

269
00:13:12,734 --> 00:13:16,638
真是不知道他們是善於理財
還是愚蠢至極!

270
00:13:17,773 --> 00:13:19,141
真好笑

271
00:13:19,141 --> 00:13:23,946
我現在給大家講個故事,在江戶時代

272
00:13:24,746 --> 00:13:28,083
有個叫芝濱的小鎮

273
00:13:28,617 --> 00:13:31,687
有一個叫魚熊的漁夫在那裡做生意

274
00:13:32,321 --> 00:13:35,691
他對魚很了解,很會賣魚

275
00:13:35,691 --> 00:13:38,227
魚鋪生意很好

276
00:13:38,227 --> 00:13:41,730
只有一個缺點,就是愛喝酒

277
00:13:42,831 --> 00:13:46,835
他一喝酒,就把生意放到一邊

278
00:13:46,835 --> 00:13:48,337
拋之腦後

279
00:13:48,337 --> 00:13:49,471
搖搖...

280
00:13:51,473 --> 00:13:52,441
晃晃...

281
00:13:53,642 --> 00:13:57,746
說著:“生意好不好無所謂...”

282
00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:01,850
就連桶裡的魚也都一樣...

283
00:14:02,351 --> 00:14:06,655
“搖搖...晃晃...”

284
00:14:07,389 --> 00:14:09,191
“喂...說你呢”

285
00:14:09,925 --> 00:14:12,761
喂,快起來行嗎?

286
00:14:13,428 --> 00:14:14,263
喂!

287
00:14:14,997 --> 00:14:15,998
喂!

288
00:14:19,668 --> 00:14:22,838
對不起師父...幾點了?

289
00:14:22,838 --> 00:14:24,439
壞了...

290
00:14:24,973 --> 00:14:26,408
睡昏頭了?

291
00:14:29,011 --> 00:14:30,746
看什麼呀?

292
00:14:31,313 --> 00:14:33,782
忘記自己老婆的樣子了嗎?

293
00:14:34,349 --> 00:14:38,153
妳是...我老婆?

294
00:14:38,153 --> 00:14:42,124
魚熊,你太過分了

295
00:14:42,624 --> 00:14:44,593
昨晚的酒還沒醒啊?

296
00:14:44,593 --> 00:14:46,495
清醒清醒好嗎?

297
00:14:46,495 --> 00:14:51,233
你說好今天會去店裡的

298
00:14:51,233 --> 00:14:52,467
店裡?

299
00:14:52,467 --> 00:14:53,402
“是啊

300
00:14:54,202 --> 00:14:57,940
已經20天沒開門了

301
00:14:57,940 --> 00:15:00,375
我估計想開都開不了了”

302
00:15:00,375 --> 00:15:04,980
“你在說什麼?
我都做你老婆多久了?

303
00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:06,782
一切我都準備好了”

304
00:15:06,782 --> 00:15:07,582
“是嗎?”

305
00:15:07,582 --> 00:15:10,919
-“那我的刀呢?”
-“也沒生鏽!我已經磨利了!”

306
00:15:10,919 --> 00:15:13,522
-“我的涼鞋丟了!”
-“我已經把它們拿出來了!”

307
00:15:13,522 --> 00:15:17,592
“看來妳的確什麼都計劃好了”

308
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,897
“喂!外面天還黑著呢!”

309
00:15:21,897 --> 00:15:24,633
“那又如何?

310
00:15:25,167 --> 00:15:29,438
等你到了河邊和商店
太陽就出來了,拜託你快去吧!

311
00:15:29,438 --> 00:15:31,907
拜託你去賣魚吧!拜託了!”

312
00:15:32,441 --> 00:15:34,576
“好,我會的!”

313
00:15:35,243 --> 00:15:38,947
他一邊說著:“真是鐵石心腸!”

314
00:15:38,947 --> 00:15:41,116
一邊出了門

315
00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:47,522
看看外面!

316
00:15:47,522 --> 00:15:49,424
-外面?
-看看有沒有人跟蹤我!

317
00:15:49,424 --> 00:15:51,760
怎麼了?你跟人打架了嗎?

318
00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:55,430
妳真是我認識的最愚蠢的女人
我不騙你

319
00:15:55,430 --> 00:15:57,599
我說過現在還太早

320
00:15:58,767 --> 00:16:00,602
你怎麼了?你瘋了嗎?

321
00:16:00,602 --> 00:16:05,007
妳先看一眼這個再說話

322
00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:06,274
這是個錢包!

323
00:16:06,274 --> 00:16:07,175
她叫道

324
00:16:08,310 --> 00:16:11,680
我到鎮上的時候,店鋪都還關著

325
00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:16,018
我當時很生氣
所以我打算直接回家揍妳一頓

326
00:16:16,018 --> 00:16:18,387
但那樣妳就會把我趕出家門

327
00:16:21,790 --> 00:16:25,927
所以我坐在水桶上抽起了菸

328
00:16:25,927 --> 00:16:29,131
但慢慢我開始想睡覺了

329
00:16:30,098 --> 00:16:33,769
於是我走到海邊
洗了把臉,讓自己清醒過來

330
00:16:45,914 --> 00:16:51,620
18、20、22、24...

331
00:16:51,620 --> 00:16:54,956
26、28...

332
00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:57,926
別數了!這是50兩!

333
00:16:57,926 --> 00:16:59,227
50兩?

334
00:17:00,629 --> 00:17:02,431
我的運氣來了!

335
00:17:02,431 --> 00:17:05,600
一定是老天爺覺得我很可憐

336
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,736
所以這就是老天爺幫助我的方式!

337
00:17:07,736 --> 00:17:08,837
但是,老公...

338
00:17:08,837 --> 00:17:11,740
給我拿些清酒!快點拿過來!

339
00:17:11,740 --> 00:17:15,043
於是魚熊君喝醉昏睡過去
接著他醒了!

340
00:17:15,043 --> 00:17:17,012
然後他的妻子撒謊騙他!

341
00:17:17,646 --> 00:17:20,882
然後那錢包...

342
00:17:20,882 --> 00:17:23,819
停...我知道這個段子

343
00:17:24,352 --> 00:17:26,721
你還是不擅長說書

344
00:17:27,689 --> 00:17:28,523
什麼?

345
00:17:28,523 --> 00:17:30,592
你說的時候沒有任何感情

346
00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:31,960
那你來講?

347
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:33,428
我又不知道段子內容

348
00:17:33,428 --> 00:17:35,697
那就閉嘴好好聽著,你個小混蛋!

349
00:17:35,697 --> 00:17:38,166
“喂,魚熊君,快起來好不好?

350
00:17:38,166 --> 00:17:39,301
醒醒!”

351
00:17:39,301 --> 00:17:40,435
-龍二?
-閉嘴!

352
00:17:40,435 --> 00:17:44,873
“你還打算睡多久呀,老公?
都日上三竿了!

353
00:17:44,873 --> 00:17:47,309
你快點去店裡吧?”

354
00:17:47,309 --> 00:17:48,977
“去店裡?別傻了!

355
00:17:48,977 --> 00:17:52,280
撿了50兩的男人還做什麼生意!”

356
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,615
50兩?

357
00:17:53,615 --> 00:17:55,584
別傻了!真是!

358
00:17:56,718 --> 00:17:59,988
妳是我老婆?妳的臉真小!

359
00:17:59,988 --> 00:18:01,223
妳有多高?

360
00:18:02,457 --> 00:18:04,626
你的酒還沒醒嗎?

361
00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:07,195
你昨晚看起來的確心情很好

362
00:18:07,696 --> 00:18:10,031
誰來付這些食物和酒的錢?

363
00:18:10,031 --> 00:18:11,533
別讓我說第二遍

364
00:18:11,533 --> 00:18:13,602
我把找到的錢包給妳了

365
00:18:13,602 --> 00:18:15,237
裡面有50兩!

366
00:18:16,004 --> 00:18:17,305
我不明白你在說什麼

367
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:18,607
等等

368
00:18:18,607 --> 00:18:21,910
就算妳很漂亮,但我還是要揍妳!

369
00:18:21,910 --> 00:18:23,678
我說了我不知道!

370
00:18:29,384 --> 00:18:32,454
在哪裡?

371
00:18:32,454 --> 00:18:35,457
該死,那50兩呢!

372
00:18:36,625 --> 00:18:38,360
那肯定是個夢

373
00:18:38,894 --> 00:18:39,728
夢?

374
00:18:41,096 --> 00:18:43,765
“我真是不知道說你什麼了
你整天遊手好閒

375
00:18:44,299 --> 00:18:48,303
腦子裡只有清酒和錢

376
00:18:48,837 --> 00:18:50,539
所以你才會做這個夢”

377
00:18:51,540 --> 00:18:53,542
“那妳的意思是?

378
00:18:54,075 --> 00:18:57,412
妳是說,我找到錢包只是一個夢

379
00:18:57,946 --> 00:19:00,081
而其實我只是喝醉了?”

380
00:19:00,649 --> 00:19:01,750
“是的”

381
00:19:04,252 --> 00:19:08,023
“多麼殘酷的夢...”

382
00:19:08,023 --> 00:19:12,661
“你向老天爺保證你會戒酒
但你卻這樣做

383
00:19:12,661 --> 00:19:13,862
所以才會遭這種報應”

384
00:19:13,862 --> 00:19:18,133
“請原諒我!如妳所說
這次我會向妳保證”

385
00:19:18,133 --> 00:19:20,702
從今天起,我保證再也不喝酒了

386
00:19:20,702 --> 00:19:22,737
從明天開始,我會盡我最大的努力!

387
00:19:22,737 --> 00:19:25,540
所以今天把酒錢給我吧”

388
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:26,575
“你保證”

389
00:19:28,743 --> 00:19:31,079
“是的!不管發生什麼
我再也不會喝酒了!”

390
00:19:31,079 --> 00:19:34,482
從那天起,他戒了酒,開始努力經營

391
00:19:36,851 --> 00:19:38,086
故事還沒講完

392
00:19:38,086 --> 00:19:41,790
然後兩、三年後
在除夕夜還是什麼時候...

393
00:19:41,790 --> 00:19:45,260
你閉嘴!你太厲害了!

394
00:19:45,260 --> 00:19:48,997
真不是開玩笑的!
我從來不知道你有這樣的天賦!

395
00:19:48,997 --> 00:19:50,432
你應該去做落語家!

396
00:19:50,432 --> 00:19:52,801
你可能會比在那家店裡賺得多

397
00:19:52,801 --> 00:19:54,936
我得回店裡去了

398
00:19:54,936 --> 00:19:57,339
繼續講完!店裡不是還有工讀生

399
00:19:57,339 --> 00:20:00,342
我知道,但問題是她...

400
00:20:00,342 --> 00:20:01,977
沒什麼

401
00:20:01,977 --> 00:20:05,013
-不要說到一半!
-跟你們講根本沒樂趣!

402
00:20:05,013 --> 00:20:07,482
你們總是在不該笑的地方笑!

403
00:20:07,482 --> 00:20:08,817
我會安靜的

404
00:20:08,817 --> 00:20:10,986
她叫麗莎,她一直沒拿到薪水

405
00:20:10,986 --> 00:20:11,920
誰叫你說了!

406
00:20:12,754 --> 00:20:14,889
別再提錢了,妳個醜女

407
00:20:14,889 --> 00:20:17,926
這麼想要錢
那就去做陪酒小姐或者妓女啊!

408
00:20:17,926 --> 00:20:19,995
反正也沒男人要妳

409
00:20:21,029 --> 00:20:23,565
我後悔說了那些話

410
00:20:23,565 --> 00:20:25,834
她那時剛被甩,很沮喪

411
00:20:25,834 --> 00:20:28,003
我想說點什麼來補救...

412
00:20:28,003 --> 00:20:29,170
如果那樣的話

413
00:20:29,170 --> 00:20:30,672
{\an8}(原裝打火機500日元)

414
00:20:30,672 --> 00:20:31,906
我會點妳的台...

415
00:20:31,906 --> 00:20:32,974
這算什麼補救

416
00:20:33,842 --> 00:20:35,677
的確不算吧?

417
00:20:35,677 --> 00:20:36,678
妳在幹什麼?

418
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:40,815
喂!住手!

419
00:20:40,815 --> 00:20:41,950
放手!

420
00:20:46,121 --> 00:20:48,490
妳要幹什麼,妳這醜八怪!

421
00:20:48,490 --> 00:20:52,627
別再叫我醜八怪了!
每次你這麼說我都想殺了你

422
00:20:52,627 --> 00:20:55,463
你可能是在開玩笑
但我都想殺了你!

423
00:20:55,463 --> 00:20:56,665
什麼?

424
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,969
她一直在記錄我叫她醜八怪的次數!

425
00:21:00,969 --> 00:21:04,205
-每天都記在她的筆記本上
-出乎意料的認真呢

426
00:21:04,205 --> 00:21:07,008
謝謝你所做的一切,把薪水轉帳給我

427
00:21:07,008 --> 00:21:09,911
如果月底前不給我薪水,我就告你!

428
00:21:10,745 --> 00:21:13,782
敗類!去死吧!

429
00:21:17,385 --> 00:21:21,923
你不該叫她醜女,她其實挺可愛的

430
00:21:21,923 --> 00:21:24,726
就算她真的很醜,我也不會這麼說

431
00:21:24,726 --> 00:21:28,263
怎麼了?她對我來說就像妹妹一樣
這只是親密的稱呼

432
00:21:28,263 --> 00:21:30,965
對,就像你叫你的老二“兒子”一樣

433
00:21:33,702 --> 00:21:35,537
你就不能想個更好的比喻嗎?

434
00:21:35,537 --> 00:21:38,173
沒關係,她是成年人了,對吧?

435
00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:40,642
我敢說她已經找到一份好工作了

436
00:21:40,642 --> 00:21:43,178
不,我覺得不是,不可能

437
00:21:43,178 --> 00:21:45,347
根據以往的經驗

438
00:21:45,347 --> 00:21:46,181
跟男人有關

439
00:21:46,181 --> 00:21:47,182
男人?

440
00:21:47,182 --> 00:21:49,984
這又不是我一次兩次
沒有付薪水給她了

441
00:21:49,984 --> 00:21:52,253
雖然嘴上抱怨,但她還是會工作

442
00:21:52,253 --> 00:21:54,789
但是她一旦有了男朋友就不行了

443
00:21:54,789 --> 00:21:56,991
她會擅離職守,還從收銀台偷錢

444
00:21:56,991 --> 00:21:58,526
然後辭職

445
00:21:58,526 --> 00:22:01,496
-被甩了之後又會回來
-她本質不壞...

446
00:22:01,496 --> 00:22:03,298
一交男朋友就變了

447
00:22:03,298 --> 00:22:05,800
而且她對男人的品味特別差勁

448
00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:09,003
帶孩子的窮光蛋電視主持人
自稱DJ的虐待狂...

449
00:22:09,003 --> 00:22:10,739
還有受虐狂的學生!

450
00:22:10,739 --> 00:22:12,974
還有那個虐待狂學生!

451
00:22:12,974 --> 00:22:16,177
不管我怎麼警告她,她都不聽

452
00:22:17,379 --> 00:22:21,049
肯定是因為男人
如果不是因為男人,她不會因為

453
00:22:21,049 --> 00:22:22,917
不發薪水這樣的事而大發雷霆

454
00:22:22,917 --> 00:22:25,620
-按理說你應該付她錢的
-嗯...

455
00:22:25,620 --> 00:22:26,955
你“嗯”什麼?

456
00:22:26,955 --> 00:22:31,559
這樣吧!小虎
拜託你幫我看看她是什麼情況!

457
00:22:32,093 --> 00:22:34,629
她其實是個好人,所以我很擔心

458
00:22:34,629 --> 00:22:36,498
-那就付她薪水
-我說了這辦不到

459
00:22:36,498 --> 00:22:38,466
好嗎?我現在就打電話給她

460
00:22:38,466 --> 00:22:42,036
-你為什麼不自己問?
-因為沒給她薪水,我不好意思!

461
00:22:42,036 --> 00:22:46,307
我不要,我最不擅長試探這種事

462
00:22:46,307 --> 00:22:47,108
大哥!

463
00:22:48,176 --> 00:22:49,677
你在這裡幹什麼?

464
00:22:49,677 --> 00:22:51,112
這個...

465
00:22:53,581 --> 00:22:54,416
你好

466
00:23:00,455 --> 00:23:02,624
你是賣衣服的?

467
00:23:02,624 --> 00:23:05,460
你比我小兩歲,對吧?

468
00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:09,697
我是大學生,我老爹說
就算是黑社會也要有大學文憑

469
00:23:09,697 --> 00:23:10,598
這樣啊

470
00:23:11,566 --> 00:23:13,701
-賺錢嗎?
-什麼意思?

471
00:23:14,702 --> 00:23:16,671
我猜這應該比做落語家賺得多

472
00:23:17,172 --> 00:23:18,873
趕緊努力還錢吧

473
00:23:19,374 --> 00:23:21,309
銀次郎,買點什麼吧

474
00:23:21,309 --> 00:23:24,546
-這裡沒有什麼...
-別廢話,隨便買點什麼!

475
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:26,614
這可不好辦

476
00:23:27,549 --> 00:23:28,650
我會買點什麼的

477
00:23:28,650 --> 00:23:29,751
不要太為難自己

478
00:23:39,060 --> 00:23:41,563
-這個多少錢?
-我說了算了

479
00:23:43,998 --> 00:23:46,401
我不想讓像你這麼遜的人穿我的衣服

480
00:23:47,101 --> 00:23:48,102
什麼?

481
00:24:13,628 --> 00:24:15,897
(徵女服務生)

482
00:24:19,334 --> 00:24:20,235
喂?

483
00:24:21,636 --> 00:24:23,505
我可能撐不下去了

484
00:24:24,572 --> 00:24:25,740
什麼?怎麼了?

485
00:24:25,740 --> 00:24:27,408
我吃了些安眠藥

486
00:24:28,743 --> 00:24:31,379
我把我朋友的車撞壞了

487
00:24:31,379 --> 00:24:35,617
我得掏20萬日元來修理
我不想活了

488
00:24:35,617 --> 00:24:38,853
-別為這種事尋短!
-那就把錢給我

489
00:24:39,854 --> 00:24:41,756
什麼?但我...

490
00:24:41,756 --> 00:24:44,292
再從店裡收銀機裡拿點錢

491
00:24:47,328 --> 00:24:49,130
算了!我開玩笑的

492
00:24:49,631 --> 00:24:52,934
只是在這種時候
妳是我唯一可以依靠的人

493
00:24:55,270 --> 00:24:57,238
魚熊君戒酒三年了

494
00:24:57,739 --> 00:25:02,010
他有手藝,所以會有一些常客...

495
00:25:04,846 --> 00:25:08,349
在他終於還清所有債務的那一年...

496
00:25:11,052 --> 00:25:12,620
對了,是在跨年夜

497
00:25:13,555 --> 00:25:17,425
他拜訪了顧客,駐足在澡堂門前...

498
00:25:17,425 --> 00:25:19,794
我想你直接讀會更快些...

499
00:25:23,097 --> 00:25:25,466
總而言之,事情是這樣的
他的妻子承認

500
00:25:25,466 --> 00:25:29,103
她把魚熊三年前找到的錢包藏起來了

501
00:25:29,103 --> 00:25:30,572
{\an8}(龍之蘇打)

502
00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,309
店長?

503
00:25:35,743 --> 00:25:37,478
店長?

504
00:25:48,556 --> 00:25:50,291
當然了...

505
00:26:00,335 --> 00:26:01,836
這是真的嗎?

506
00:26:01,836 --> 00:26:04,405
“老公,這個錢包看起來眼熟嗎?”

507
00:26:04,973 --> 00:26:07,041
“是的”

508
00:26:07,041 --> 00:26:09,744
“這是你三年前撿到的錢包”

509
00:26:10,311 --> 00:26:13,448
“那一切不都只是個夢嗎?”

510
00:26:13,448 --> 00:26:15,783
“我騙你說那只是個夢”

511
00:26:15,783 --> 00:26:17,785
“要打要罵隨你吧”

512
00:26:17,785 --> 00:26:20,021
“別傻了!我怎麼會打妳?

513
00:26:20,021 --> 00:26:22,290
那會弄疼我的手的!”

514
00:26:22,290 --> 00:26:24,325
大哥,你看到我的錢包了嗎?

515
00:26:24,325 --> 00:26:25,159
沒有!

516
00:26:25,159 --> 00:26:27,695
在裏原宿買衣服的時候還有...

517
00:26:27,695 --> 00:26:31,432
-去哪裡了呢?
-閉嘴...

518
00:26:31,432 --> 00:26:33,101
我要說到精采的部分了

519
00:26:33,901 --> 00:26:35,703
你看,你搞得我都不知道念哪裡了

520
00:26:37,939 --> 00:26:39,273
好了,已經夠了

521
00:26:39,273 --> 00:26:40,475
我去找找看

522
00:26:43,044 --> 00:26:44,479
總而言之

523
00:26:45,446 --> 00:26:50,084
妻子欺騙丈夫
是為了讓他戒酒努力工作

524
00:26:51,052 --> 00:26:51,886
沒錯

525
00:26:53,855 --> 00:26:55,323
這絕對是個好故事

526
00:26:58,459 --> 00:27:00,628
但現實並非如此簡單

527
00:27:00,628 --> 00:27:01,829
為何?

528
00:27:01,829 --> 00:27:03,564
我丈夫是普通職員

529
00:27:03,564 --> 00:27:07,101
他沒有像漁夫那樣有手藝

530
00:27:07,702 --> 00:27:10,538
即使他想工作,但是公司倒閉...

531
00:27:11,439 --> 00:27:13,841
包括他的自尊心和社會對他的看法

532
00:27:13,841 --> 00:27:15,877
並不是可以隨隨便便找工作的

533
00:27:17,412 --> 00:27:20,448
我無法想像三年後我的狀態

534
00:27:20,448 --> 00:27:21,783
所以我想說的是

535
00:27:22,283 --> 00:27:25,486
我意識到現在的人們
無法對這個故事產生共鳴

536
00:27:25,486 --> 00:27:27,522
再教我一個別的

537
00:27:27,522 --> 00:27:29,991
教你另一個故事?沒那麼容易

538
00:27:29,991 --> 00:27:32,960
別擔心,加上些技巧
即使是老故事也能讓人產生共鳴

539
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:35,263
-是你沒有說服力
-閉嘴,四眼

540
00:27:35,263 --> 00:27:37,365
簡直一副公司職員的樣子

541
00:27:37,365 --> 00:27:40,902
小虎,你最喜歡的電影是什麼?

542
00:27:40,902 --> 00:27:42,336
《南之王》

543
00:27:43,504 --> 00:27:45,206
-還有嗎?
-《小鬼當家》

544
00:27:45,206 --> 00:27:48,409
還真沒想到呢

545
00:27:48,409 --> 00:27:49,911
那是虛構的,對吧?

546
00:27:49,911 --> 00:27:51,746
落語的段子也是虛構的

547
00:27:51,746 --> 00:27:53,114
你小時候獨自一人的時候

548
00:27:53,114 --> 00:27:55,717
就從來沒有被壞人攻擊過

549
00:27:55,717 --> 00:27:57,085
-我被攻擊過
-真的嗎?

550
00:27:57,585 --> 00:28:00,988
有人在逃避還債,所以我去了他家

551
00:28:00,988 --> 00:28:03,057
-但當時只有一個孩子...
-你才是那個壞人啊?

552
00:28:03,057 --> 00:28:05,927
還真不是虛構的,這太難了師父

553
00:28:05,927 --> 00:28:10,998
小虎,你聽了我演繹的《芝濱》後
有什麼感覺?

554
00:28:10,998 --> 00:28:12,667
我又哭又笑,很是感動

555
00:28:12,667 --> 00:28:15,870
這感想也太短小精悍了
就像小泉首相一樣!

556
00:28:16,871 --> 00:28:23,111
這個故事哪一部分最讓你感動?

557
00:28:24,312 --> 00:28:26,614
他說他妻子是女神那部分吧?

558
00:28:26,614 --> 00:28:29,584
好,那就忘記其他的

559
00:28:29,584 --> 00:28:30,451
忘記?

560
00:28:30,451 --> 00:28:34,655
你現在無法

561
00:28:34,655 --> 00:28:37,291
記住並講述整個故事

562
00:28:37,291 --> 00:28:39,260
所以與其把事情搞複雜

563
00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:44,665
不如把你的重點都放在那個情感部分

564
00:28:45,233 --> 00:28:48,936
這樣,不管是上班族還是什麼人

565
00:28:48,936 --> 00:28:51,005
觀眾都能有所共鳴

566
00:28:54,041 --> 00:28:55,076
師父

567
00:28:55,076 --> 00:28:56,144
怎麼了?

568
00:28:56,144 --> 00:28:58,045
你是位好老師

569
00:29:03,451 --> 00:29:07,522
那就開始吧

570
00:29:08,456 --> 00:29:10,024
“你說得太對了!

571
00:29:11,592 --> 00:29:17,198
別說50兩,就算再多
我都能一下子花光!

572
00:29:17,698 --> 00:29:19,767
謝謝妳騙了我

573
00:29:21,002 --> 00:29:25,573
多虧了妳,我恢復了理智
現在可以過一個無債一身輕的新年了

574
00:29:26,574 --> 00:29:28,342
太感謝妳了

575
00:29:30,178 --> 00:29:31,479
妳就是女神”

576
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,115
“你不必向我致意

577
00:29:34,715 --> 00:29:36,884
來,喝一杯”

578
00:29:36,884 --> 00:29:40,354
我覺得他今天能順利講完

579
00:29:40,354 --> 00:29:43,057
-“我戒酒了”
-說得不錯

580
00:29:43,758 --> 00:29:45,693
“我發過誓不會再喝酒了”

581
00:29:46,527 --> 00:29:50,231
“現在沒關係了,你不再是一個
被酒精控制的人了”

582
00:29:55,837 --> 00:29:57,505
誰啊?正說到最精采部分呢!

583
00:29:58,005 --> 00:29:59,440
把電話掛掉!

584
00:30:00,007 --> 00:30:01,709
人家正在講愛情故事呢...

585
00:30:01,709 --> 00:30:02,844
喂?

586
00:30:03,711 --> 00:30:04,579
他竟然接電話?

587
00:30:04,579 --> 00:30:06,881
你在幹什麼?說好下午4點半碰面的

588
00:30:06,881 --> 00:30:08,916
抱歉,我正在表演...

589
00:30:10,218 --> 00:30:12,486
-非得這時候嗎?
-當然!

590
00:30:12,486 --> 00:30:13,387
我受夠了!

591
00:30:13,387 --> 00:30:16,357
只有我們兩個多尷尬
這地方根本沒開門

592
00:30:20,461 --> 00:30:21,495
掛斷了

593
00:30:27,134 --> 00:30:28,002
白痴...

594
00:30:28,569 --> 00:30:31,339
抱歉

595
00:30:31,839 --> 00:30:33,708
下次我會靜音的

596
00:30:34,942 --> 00:30:36,377
我說到哪裡了?

597
00:30:36,377 --> 00:30:38,045
“真的可以嗎?”

598
00:30:38,045 --> 00:30:39,647
太荒謬了!

599
00:30:39,647 --> 00:30:41,115
氛圍都被你破壞了

600
00:30:42,550 --> 00:30:44,285
“不行

601
00:30:44,285 --> 00:30:47,788
我不能再喝酒了”

602
00:30:47,788 --> 00:30:48,956
“為何?”

603
00:30:51,525 --> 00:30:55,496
如果你的錢包掉在原宿
為什麼會有人跑來淺草送來?

604
00:30:55,496 --> 00:30:59,066
我是說我可能把它掉在原宿了!

605
00:30:59,066 --> 00:31:01,435
意思是!我也可能把它掉在淺草了!

606
00:31:07,375 --> 00:31:09,911
我對男人的品味太差了!

607
00:31:11,245 --> 00:31:13,848
起碼妳有自知之明

608
00:31:13,848 --> 00:31:16,284
一看上眼,我就會愛上對方

609
00:31:16,284 --> 00:31:18,986
不管年紀大小!

610
00:31:19,487 --> 00:31:24,091
那我呢?我老婆剛甩了我
所以我是自由之身

611
00:31:25,393 --> 00:31:28,429
我佔有慾很強,控制不住自己

612
00:31:28,429 --> 00:31:31,232
我必須黏著人
才能感覺到這是一段戀情

613
00:31:31,232 --> 00:31:33,134
我喜歡黏人的女孩

614
00:31:33,134 --> 00:31:36,203
能不能懂點事!
她無視你就已經很客氣了!

615
00:31:36,203 --> 00:31:37,505
妳喜歡做愛,是吧?

616
00:31:38,005 --> 00:31:39,640
這位更遲鈍!

617
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,810
正常次數就行
沒有性我就沒有安全感

618
00:31:42,810 --> 00:31:44,145
辰夫...

619
00:31:44,145 --> 00:31:46,213
-我愛妳!
-誰問你了?

620
00:31:46,213 --> 00:31:50,151
妳還年輕
為什麼非得一心撲在男人身上呢?

621
00:31:50,151 --> 00:31:52,486
除了男人,妳還喜歡什麼?

622
00:31:53,854 --> 00:31:54,689
喝酒!

623
00:31:56,190 --> 00:31:58,459
從我們來到這裡之後妳就一直在喝酒

624
00:31:59,527 --> 00:32:04,231
喝酒、男人、傳訊息、卡拉OK
《鐵面無私》

625
00:32:04,732 --> 00:32:05,933
牛奶布丁...

626
00:32:07,068 --> 00:32:08,235
還有衣服

627
00:32:09,270 --> 00:32:10,504
衣服...

628
00:32:13,407 --> 00:32:18,079
如果妳喜歡衣服
為什麼不把衣服當成男朋友呢?

629
00:32:19,347 --> 00:32:21,382
什麼?

630
00:32:21,382 --> 00:32:23,417
她竟然這反應...

631
00:32:24,051 --> 00:32:26,020
可以理解,畢竟妳就這品味

632
00:32:26,020 --> 00:32:28,823
閉嘴,趕緊閉嘴!

633
00:32:28,823 --> 00:32:32,460
如果一個男人真的愛妳

634
00:32:32,994 --> 00:32:35,696
他絕不會來干涉妳的生活

635
00:32:35,696 --> 00:32:37,965
他絕不會讓妳辭職或者跳槽

636
00:32:38,532 --> 00:32:41,335
-真的?
-他們只是在利用妳!

637
00:32:41,335 --> 00:32:44,271
他們在利用妳!妳快清醒吧!

638
00:32:44,271 --> 00:32:47,742
在工作的時候找一個正常的男人約會

639
00:32:47,742 --> 00:32:49,143
應該沒那麼難

640
00:32:49,944 --> 00:32:52,013
我心裡明白這些,但...

641
00:32:52,013 --> 00:32:56,917
來,喝了它,如果妳繼續等下去
完美的男人會出現的

642
00:32:56,917 --> 00:33:01,288
一個善良、有錢並能理解妳的人

643
00:33:01,288 --> 00:33:04,792
沒錯!只要好好生活就能等到他了!

644
00:33:04,792 --> 00:33:08,596
一個懂我、心地善良
且有錢的完美男人

645
00:33:08,596 --> 00:33:10,998
-還要長得帥!
-我從沒說過應該長得帥

646
00:33:10,998 --> 00:33:16,037
今天你真讓我大開眼界!
店長,你今天真像成熟男人

647
00:33:16,037 --> 00:33:17,038
成熟男人是會付妳薪水的...

648
00:33:17,038 --> 00:33:20,107
閉嘴,我遲早會付錢給她的!

649
00:33:20,107 --> 00:33:23,611
說真的!這傢伙太小氣了!超蠢的!

650
00:33:37,024 --> 00:33:38,125
好

651
00:33:42,163 --> 00:33:45,433
我很抱歉...

652
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:47,868
讓你和我一起做這種事

653
00:33:47,868 --> 00:33:50,805
沒事,最後這不是挺好的

654
00:33:51,872 --> 00:33:52,940
來乾杯吧

655
00:33:53,941 --> 00:33:54,775
乾杯!

656
00:34:02,083 --> 00:34:05,586
對了,我一直想問你...

657
00:34:07,054 --> 00:34:07,922
什麼?

658
00:34:10,124 --> 00:34:11,358
你為什麼不去落語?

659
00:34:14,762 --> 00:34:15,863
饒了我吧...

660
00:34:15,863 --> 00:34:18,299
我不是喝多了才這麼說的

661
00:34:18,299 --> 00:34:21,469
你的《芝濱》講得太好了
我都起雞皮疙瘩了

662
00:34:21,469 --> 00:34:24,038
聽起來活靈活現,節奏明快

663
00:34:24,705 --> 00:34:26,373
不去落語真是浪費天賦

664
00:34:26,874 --> 00:34:30,144
這不是小虎嗎?

665
00:34:31,445 --> 00:34:34,148
喂,你們幹什麼?不付錢就喝酒?

666
00:34:35,149 --> 00:34:37,151
-是我老爸讓你勸我的嗎?
-喂!

667
00:34:40,121 --> 00:34:44,725
如果我回家,我老爸就能還清債務了

668
00:34:44,725 --> 00:34:46,894
然後你就可以金盆洗手

669
00:34:46,894 --> 00:34:47,795
並不是那樣...

670
00:34:47,795 --> 00:34:48,696
抱歉,但是...

671
00:34:49,930 --> 00:34:53,033
我可不像你那個超聽爸爸話的小弟

672
00:34:55,536 --> 00:34:56,370
抱歉

673
00:35:00,841 --> 00:35:01,775
妳沒事吧?

674
00:35:04,678 --> 00:35:05,513
沒事

675
00:35:06,046 --> 00:35:09,016
-有什麼我能幫妳的嗎?
-我撿到一個皮夾

676
00:35:09,583 --> 00:35:10,184
什麼?

677
00:35:10,985 --> 00:35:11,719
什麼?

678
00:35:12,319 --> 00:35:13,854
能不能讓我快速看一眼?

679
00:35:16,123 --> 00:35:18,425
警官,這是我的皮夾!

680
00:35:19,026 --> 00:35:20,427
-真的嗎?
-真的!

681
00:35:20,427 --> 00:35:23,397
得救了!太感謝了!

682
00:35:23,931 --> 00:35:26,333
如果沒有這個,我就麻煩大了!

683
00:35:27,401 --> 00:35:28,302
太感謝了!

684
00:35:29,069 --> 00:35:32,506
太感謝了!妳救了我的命!

685
00:35:34,475 --> 00:35:35,309
那個...

686
00:35:38,712 --> 00:35:40,147
你喜歡賣衣服嗎?

687
00:35:41,448 --> 00:35:43,751
當然!我幹這行就是因為我自己喜歡

688
00:35:44,318 --> 00:35:46,687
我明白了,那很好

689
00:35:50,558 --> 00:35:52,693
怎麼了?有話直說

690
00:35:53,561 --> 00:35:54,428
其實...

691
00:35:55,796 --> 00:36:00,067
你在店裡總是很暴躁

692
00:36:00,568 --> 00:36:03,637
我還以為你是強迫自己
逃避做一名落語家

693
00:36:05,139 --> 00:36:08,542
逃避做落語家
或者可能是逃避你的父親

694
00:36:09,510 --> 00:36:10,578
如果我說錯了...

695
00:36:10,578 --> 00:36:13,180
做自己真正喜歡的事有那麼棒嗎?

696
00:36:14,415 --> 00:36:15,249
什麼?

697
00:36:17,785 --> 00:36:20,421
曾經喜歡的東西不再喜歡了

698
00:36:20,421 --> 00:36:22,523
當然只好去找其他喜歡的新東西

699
00:36:24,058 --> 00:36:27,361
其實應該是我問你
你是否真的喜歡落語

700
00:36:28,362 --> 00:36:30,497
-我這麼做是因為我喜歡
-是嗎?

701
00:36:31,031 --> 00:36:35,269
我想你只是厭倦了做黑社會
然後碰巧有這機遇才開始做的吧

702
00:36:35,269 --> 00:36:36,870
對你來說很簡單

703
00:36:36,870 --> 00:36:39,707
幹不好了,可以回去當黑幫

704
00:36:39,707 --> 00:36:42,443
你和師父或老大又沒有血緣關係

705
00:36:43,244 --> 00:36:45,246
對我來說不一樣

706
00:36:46,247 --> 00:36:48,816
不像你,我不能半途而廢

707
00:36:49,316 --> 00:36:52,253
如果我要回去
我必須準備好全力以赴

708
00:36:52,753 --> 00:36:54,188
說實話

709
00:36:54,955 --> 00:36:56,824
像你這樣的混混是不可能成功的

710
00:37:17,077 --> 00:37:19,179
你對我了解多少?

711
00:37:21,849 --> 00:37:25,653
賠錢!

712
00:37:37,231 --> 00:37:40,200
這不夠!

713
00:37:48,542 --> 00:37:52,146
討厭!爸爸放屁了!

714
00:37:52,146 --> 00:37:53,814
不是我,是屯太

715
00:37:53,814 --> 00:37:55,482
讓我聞聞...

716
00:37:56,283 --> 00:38:00,387
不,媽媽!我們吃的都一樣
妳聞不出區別的

717
00:38:01,622 --> 00:38:04,858
多和諧的一家人啊!多高興!

718
00:38:04,858 --> 00:38:06,994
現在輪到我了!

719
00:38:11,031 --> 00:38:13,701
你們到底有多親密?小虎呢?

720
00:38:14,201 --> 00:38:16,670
我以為他和你在一起

721
00:38:17,237 --> 00:38:19,406
他說要和你見面,還沒回來

722
00:38:19,406 --> 00:38:20,207
噢

723
00:38:21,241 --> 00:38:22,710
等等,混蛋!

724
00:38:24,044 --> 00:38:26,580
-怎麼了,你這個臭藝人?
-整理好這個

725
00:38:26,580 --> 00:38:27,781
屯太,別這樣

726
00:38:27,781 --> 00:38:30,818
這既是你家,也是我家

727
00:38:31,418 --> 00:38:35,022
我不是以臭藝人的身分跟你說話
而是以大哥的身分

728
00:38:35,022 --> 00:38:39,393
在五秒鐘內把它撿回去!
五、四、三...

729
00:38:41,362 --> 00:38:46,166
你幹什麼?層層疊!

730
00:38:46,166 --> 00:38:49,203
-喂,小虎出什麼事了嗎?
-不關你的事

731
00:38:49,203 --> 00:38:51,772
跟我有關,他是我的弟子

732
00:38:51,772 --> 00:38:52,806
好嗎?

733
00:38:52,806 --> 00:38:55,042
我不會讓你傷害他

734
00:38:56,210 --> 00:38:58,779
他不知道吃了多少苦

735
00:38:59,847 --> 00:39:01,515
不像你!

736
00:39:01,515 --> 00:39:02,416
懂嗎?

737
00:39:03,617 --> 00:39:05,219
他的父母死在他面前的時候

738
00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:09,690
他只有12歲!

739
00:39:10,190 --> 00:39:13,260
他們因負債而自殺

740
00:39:14,161 --> 00:39:17,064
創傷太大,於是他就忘記了如何微笑

741
00:39:17,064 --> 00:39:18,499
他當時無處可去

742
00:39:19,666 --> 00:39:22,669
父母雙亡也沒有錢

743
00:39:23,937 --> 00:39:27,408
新宿流星會把他收入麾下

744
00:39:28,542 --> 00:39:32,246
他成為黑幫成員並不是自己所願

745
00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:35,516
這是他唯一的選擇!

746
00:39:36,083 --> 00:39:37,751
那傢伙...

747
00:39:40,254 --> 00:39:42,122
聽了我的段子...

748
00:39:44,191 --> 00:39:45,559
然後笑了!

749
00:39:46,460 --> 00:39:50,464
他笑了!

750
00:39:50,464 --> 00:39:52,933
層層疊...我們把它撿起來

751
00:39:53,434 --> 00:39:56,437
他向他的救星,幫派老大請求退出

752
00:39:57,271 --> 00:39:58,672
來這裡...

753
00:40:00,841 --> 00:40:03,377
他想成為一個說書人,成為我的學徒

754
00:40:03,977 --> 00:40:04,812
你知道...

755
00:40:05,679 --> 00:40:09,116
我一開始拒絕了他
因為感覺是麻煩事

756
00:40:11,051 --> 00:40:14,788
我也不知道我不是什麼大師

757
00:40:15,923 --> 00:40:17,591
但他就是不聽

758
00:40:18,692 --> 00:40:21,028
他是下了多大的決心啊

759
00:40:21,595 --> 00:40:23,430
他和你完全不一樣

760
00:40:23,430 --> 00:40:26,600
他可不是三分鐘熱度!

761
00:40:27,501 --> 00:40:31,171
他是個孤獨的人

762
00:40:33,340 --> 00:40:37,678
你離開這房子,故作獨立

763
00:40:37,678 --> 00:40:39,746
但你有時還是會回來...

764
00:40:40,414 --> 00:40:42,683
自以為是,在不經意之間

765
00:40:42,683 --> 00:40:45,853
傷害別人

766
00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:48,355
如果你繼續這樣下去

767
00:40:49,056 --> 00:40:51,792
到最後,你真的會...

768
00:40:52,626 --> 00:40:55,496
孤獨終老

769
00:40:56,930 --> 00:40:57,798
懂嗎?

770
00:40:59,967 --> 00:41:01,568
一個孤獨的人的生命結局

771
00:41:02,603 --> 00:41:04,104
就是一個人孤零零的死去

772
00:41:06,039 --> 00:41:07,341
你怎麼能...

773
00:41:07,341 --> 00:41:08,542
什麼?

774
00:41:10,744 --> 00:41:13,380
你怎麼能對你的親生兒子說這些?

775
00:41:21,288 --> 00:41:22,956
親生兒子

776
00:41:25,092 --> 00:41:27,561
不會對他的父親做這樣的事!

777
00:41:27,561 --> 00:41:29,329
爸爸,別這樣!

778
00:41:29,329 --> 00:41:30,397
別說了!

779
00:41:30,397 --> 00:41:32,933
媽媽都哭了!

780
00:41:32,933 --> 00:41:34,968
小百合

781
00:41:34,968 --> 00:41:37,070
不!對不起!

782
00:41:37,070 --> 00:41:42,576
我說過不要讓小百合哭!

783
00:41:43,076 --> 00:41:46,213
-不是我!
-誰把她弄哭了?

784
00:41:46,213 --> 00:41:48,081
誰把她弄哭了!

785
00:41:48,081 --> 00:41:49,216
啊?

786
00:41:53,053 --> 00:41:54,454
龍平?

787
00:41:54,955 --> 00:41:55,789
龍平?

788
00:41:55,789 --> 00:41:56,590
抱歉

789
00:41:56,590 --> 00:41:58,592
-龍平?
-他暈倒了

790
00:41:58,592 --> 00:42:00,994
-我用力過猛了
-快來幫忙

791
00:42:02,663 --> 00:42:03,830
對不起!

792
00:42:03,830 --> 00:42:06,733
店長!我終於找到他了!

793
00:42:06,733 --> 00:42:07,534
是...

794
00:42:07,534 --> 00:42:13,040
他英俊瀟灑,閃閃發光,簡直超棒的

795
00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:15,742
-挺好
-多虧了你

796
00:42:15,742 --> 00:42:18,211
-什麼?
-你沒在聽嗎?

797
00:42:18,211 --> 00:42:20,347
-妳什麼都沒說
-我要辭職

798
00:42:20,347 --> 00:42:21,214
什麼?

799
00:42:21,214 --> 00:42:24,484
我找到那個有錢帥哥了!
他超棒!有點叛逆

800
00:42:24,484 --> 00:42:27,087
他穿的外套後面有虎與龍的圖案

801
00:42:27,087 --> 00:42:28,455
冷靜點

802
00:42:30,591 --> 00:42:31,425
什麼外套?

803
00:42:31,425 --> 00:42:35,329
我們到底該怎麼辦?

804
00:42:39,366 --> 00:42:40,200
怎麼了?

805
00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:44,538
我們該怎麼辦,小虎?這太可怕了!

806
00:42:44,538 --> 00:42:47,374
小虎!我不是告訴過你要盯著他嗎!

807
00:42:49,142 --> 00:42:52,312
你到底做了什麼?

808
00:42:57,284 --> 00:43:00,020
被老大說中了...

809
00:43:02,255 --> 00:43:04,591
你在幹什麼?

810
00:43:07,027 --> 00:43:10,631
你個白痴...

811
00:43:11,431 --> 00:43:12,799
那個導遊...

812
00:43:13,834 --> 00:43:15,202
什麼?

813
00:43:15,202 --> 00:43:17,237
他們都是我的男朋友...

814
00:43:17,237 --> 00:43:21,408
喂!妳以為妳是誰
還讓這些傢伙為妳紋身?

815
00:43:21,408 --> 00:43:25,345
好了!各位的右邊是風神

816
00:43:25,345 --> 00:43:26,513
左邊是...

817
00:43:28,015 --> 00:43:28,849
說書人先生?

818
00:43:28,849 --> 00:43:30,117
閉嘴,跟我來!

819
00:43:30,117 --> 00:43:33,253
-但我在工作
-過來

820
00:43:52,072 --> 00:43:54,241
{\an8}(芳子咖啡屋)

821
00:43:54,241 --> 00:43:58,679
我還是忘不了我在東京的生活

822
00:44:00,013 --> 00:44:03,150
雖然有點不好意思,但我必須回來

823
00:44:04,051 --> 00:44:08,522
我在家的時候我丈夫會緊張

824
00:44:09,056 --> 00:44:11,591
我不想回去做陪酒小姐...

825
00:44:12,092 --> 00:44:14,528
因為那會再次讓男人神魂顛倒

826
00:44:15,495 --> 00:44:18,565
我覺得年輕人不會坐觀光巴士...

827
00:44:19,199 --> 00:44:21,435
並且我以前經常照顧老人...

828
00:44:21,435 --> 00:44:24,137
誰管妳為什麼當導遊

829
00:44:26,373 --> 00:44:28,508
你們怎麼認識的?

830
00:44:28,508 --> 00:44:29,576
旅遊巴士上!

831
00:44:29,576 --> 00:44:30,677
對,旅遊巴士!

832
00:44:31,445 --> 00:44:32,846
出去一下

833
00:44:32,846 --> 00:44:35,816
幸好我沒留著那個錢包

834
00:44:36,383 --> 00:44:38,785
一定是上帝嘉獎我

835
00:44:38,785 --> 00:44:40,854
上天看我太可憐

836
00:44:40,854 --> 00:44:42,723
妳有他的號碼嗎?

837
00:44:42,723 --> 00:44:45,392
沒有,但我給了他我的電郵地址

838
00:44:45,392 --> 00:44:46,727
他有寄電郵給妳嗎?

839
00:44:46,727 --> 00:44:47,894
還沒有

840
00:44:49,362 --> 00:44:50,564
妳確定不是...

841
00:44:52,599 --> 00:44:54,101
在做夢嗎?

842
00:44:54,101 --> 00:44:54,835
什麼?

843
00:44:54,835 --> 00:44:57,237
把它當做一場夢,忘了它吧

844
00:44:57,237 --> 00:44:59,172
什麼?但她就在那裡!

845
00:44:59,172 --> 00:45:01,441
妳昨晚喝得太醉了

846
00:45:01,441 --> 00:45:04,911
我們又在談論男人
所以妳才做了那個夢...

847
00:45:06,947 --> 00:45:11,351
別傻了!我都跟他握手了!

848
00:45:11,351 --> 00:45:13,253
我說了那就是個夢!

849
00:45:14,287 --> 00:45:17,023
那皮夾呢?我在這裡找到的!

850
00:45:17,023 --> 00:45:18,959
妳的確把皮夾交給了警察

851
00:45:18,959 --> 00:45:22,162
然後才夢見到那個穿外套的傢伙

852
00:45:22,696 --> 00:45:23,530
不可能!

853
00:45:23,530 --> 00:45:25,899
妳還記得是怎麼回家的嗎?

854
00:45:28,101 --> 00:45:28,935
這...

855
00:45:28,935 --> 00:45:31,104
看吧!我就說這只是個夢!

856
00:45:31,671 --> 00:45:35,642
這就是妳一直想著男人的下場!

857
00:45:36,409 --> 00:45:38,378
回去工作!

858
00:45:38,378 --> 00:45:40,347
把這些破衣服都拿出來

859
00:45:41,581 --> 00:45:42,949
她也許是個寶

860
00:45:43,450 --> 00:45:46,753
但正因為如此
還有很多男人在追求她

861
00:45:47,354 --> 00:45:49,689
就像鴿子因為鳥食而興奮一樣

862
00:45:50,524 --> 00:45:52,192
你只是其中一隻鴿子

863
00:45:53,026 --> 00:45:53,960
大哥...

864
00:45:55,495 --> 00:45:58,064
我知道還有五個人,不,六個人

865
00:45:58,064 --> 00:46:00,867
和你有同樣的紋身

866
00:46:02,269 --> 00:46:03,403
你想成為一隻鴿子

867
00:46:04,871 --> 00:46:06,006
是嗎?銀次郎

868
00:46:07,641 --> 00:46:09,476
你跟我不一樣

869
00:46:09,476 --> 00:46:11,812
你是新宿流星會的接班人

870
00:46:13,446 --> 00:46:17,017
身為你的大哥,我勸你一句

871
00:46:18,285 --> 00:46:21,755
別被女人耍得團團轉
要當一個把女人耍得團團轉的男人

872
00:46:28,461 --> 00:46:29,396
明白了

873
00:46:29,396 --> 00:46:30,730
好

874
00:46:46,847 --> 00:46:47,881
阿銀去哪裡了?

875
00:46:48,615 --> 00:46:49,816
我讓他走了

876
00:46:51,351 --> 00:46:55,055
抱歉,但我不會讓
妳這樣的神秘女子接近他

877
00:46:55,622 --> 00:46:56,756
什麼意思?

878
00:46:57,424 --> 00:46:58,491
他是黑社會

879
00:46:58,992 --> 00:47:01,261
而且是我們組織的未來領袖

880
00:47:01,928 --> 00:47:04,431
我是為他們的手下
也是他的“導師”

881
00:47:05,665 --> 00:47:06,533
明白了嗎?

882
00:47:06,533 --> 00:47:07,834
別再見他了

883
00:47:07,834 --> 00:47:10,103
你是想佔有我嗎?

884
00:47:10,103 --> 00:47:12,205
佔有妳?

885
00:47:12,205 --> 00:47:15,642
我不在乎,我什麼時候能再見到你?

886
00:47:19,813 --> 00:47:22,349
-我?
-對,就是你,什麼時候?

887
00:47:22,349 --> 00:47:25,785
什麼叫什麼時候?
我們根本都沒談過見面的事!

888
00:47:25,785 --> 00:47:27,554
那你的手機號碼多少?

889
00:47:27,554 --> 00:47:28,622
妳怎麼了?

890
00:47:29,856 --> 00:47:31,124
怎麼了?

891
00:47:31,124 --> 00:47:32,692
告訴我!

892
00:47:33,260 --> 00:47:34,294
你號碼是多少?

893
00:47:51,344 --> 00:47:54,247
老虎、老虎,勇猛威武!

894
00:48:00,253 --> 00:48:03,089
我給大家講個段子...

895
00:48:03,723 --> 00:48:05,992
開始之前,各位請關掉手機...

896
00:48:05,992 --> 00:48:07,494
你還敢說我們!

897
00:48:07,494 --> 00:48:09,896
{\an8}(小虎)

898
00:48:12,565 --> 00:48:17,237
從前有個年輕的店主叫龍

899
00:48:17,237 --> 00:48:18,571
你們都記得他嗎?

900
00:48:19,406 --> 00:48:21,608
那個把狐狸精的名字

901
00:48:21,608 --> 00:48:24,577
刻在身上的蠢貨

902
00:48:25,245 --> 00:48:28,715
有個叫麗莎的女孩在他店裡工作

903
00:48:29,316 --> 00:48:32,886
她是個好女孩
但是容易立刻墜入愛河

904
00:48:32,886 --> 00:48:36,523
無論年紀大小
只要是她覺得有吸引力的人

905
00:48:36,523 --> 00:48:38,091
她都會一下子陷進去

906
00:48:38,091 --> 00:48:42,729
她碰巧遇到了一個
叫銀次郎的黑幫成員

907
00:48:43,229 --> 00:48:45,298
龍的老相識

908
00:48:45,298 --> 00:48:46,066
(沒有新郵件)

909
00:48:46,066 --> 00:48:49,135
龍覺得麗莎會再次拋下工作

910
00:48:49,135 --> 00:48:52,305
所以他說服她這一切只是個惡夢...

911
00:48:52,872 --> 00:48:55,108
我想你是對的,店長

912
00:48:55,108 --> 00:48:55,842
什麼?

913
00:48:55,842 --> 00:48:57,911
都是一場夢,對嗎?

914
00:49:00,246 --> 00:49:03,550
就當做是一場夢吧
我會暫時遠離男人

915
00:49:04,718 --> 00:49:08,722
該回去工作了!
我應該把這個掛在哪裡?店長

916
00:49:09,723 --> 00:49:10,423
那裡

917
00:49:10,423 --> 00:49:11,157
好!

918
00:49:12,559 --> 00:49:16,463
店長,明天是盤點日,對吧?
我來幫忙

919
00:49:17,063 --> 00:49:17,831
好

920
00:49:17,831 --> 00:49:18,565
啊!

921
00:49:19,366 --> 00:49:22,268
歡迎光臨!看到喜歡的跟我說

922
00:49:22,268 --> 00:49:23,503
可以試穿的

923
00:49:25,138 --> 00:49:30,543
看到她那麼賣力工作
龍倒是越愧疚...

924
00:49:31,077 --> 00:49:32,979
店長,關於業績...

925
00:49:32,979 --> 00:49:35,015
別再一直喊我“店長”了!

926
00:49:40,754 --> 00:49:42,122
你幹什麼?店長

927
00:49:42,122 --> 00:49:43,990
我出去的時候給我好好看店!

928
00:49:43,990 --> 00:49:48,128
所以龍決定直接去銀次郎談判

929
00:49:50,230 --> 00:49:52,599
你說過你會買這一堆的,對吧?

930
00:49:52,599 --> 00:49:53,767
是的

931
00:49:53,767 --> 00:49:56,436
你說過你很想要它們
你會買下來的,對吧?

932
00:49:56,436 --> 00:49:58,038
我可沒說要買這麼多

933
00:49:58,671 --> 00:50:02,475
喂...你不是屯兵衛的兒子嗎?

934
00:50:04,444 --> 00:50:07,180
全部買下來!10萬日元全部賣給你

935
00:50:08,448 --> 00:50:09,582
請買下來

936
00:50:10,617 --> 00:50:13,453
-你也買一些!
-誰會想要這些破衣服!

937
00:50:13,453 --> 00:50:16,689
我不知道你和我兒子之間發生了什麼

938
00:50:16,689 --> 00:50:19,492
但你老爸欠我400萬日元!

939
00:50:19,492 --> 00:50:22,162
-我為什麼要買這個?
-這和我父親無關!

940
00:50:22,162 --> 00:50:23,897
我正在和你兒子說話

941
00:50:23,897 --> 00:50:25,031
那...

942
00:50:25,031 --> 00:50:25,932
什麼?

943
00:50:28,435 --> 00:50:30,003
噢,這個?

944
00:50:31,237 --> 00:50:33,139
我只是覺得這樣很酷...

945
00:50:35,008 --> 00:50:35,842
我明白了

946
00:50:40,747 --> 00:50:41,581
走了

947
00:50:41,581 --> 00:50:42,882
等等,錢呢?

948
00:50:44,150 --> 00:50:45,051
對

949
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:49,322
我要你晚點把錢送到店裡

950
00:50:49,923 --> 00:50:52,459
-為什麼?
-袋子裡有個信封

951
00:50:54,027 --> 00:50:55,695
放進信封裡再拿過來

952
00:50:57,931 --> 00:51:01,835
銀次郎雖然不知道什麼情況
但他還是

953
00:51:01,835 --> 00:51:03,937
把裝著10萬日元的信封帶到了店裡

954
00:51:03,937 --> 00:51:05,071
“有人在嗎!”

955
00:51:05,071 --> 00:51:06,039
歡迎光臨!

956
00:51:07,574 --> 00:51:09,909
原來妳在這裡工作?

957
00:51:13,046 --> 00:51:17,150
這家店的老闆
昨天讓我買了一大堆衣服

958
00:51:19,152 --> 00:51:19,986
這是...

959
00:51:20,553 --> 00:51:21,554
錢

960
00:51:21,554 --> 00:51:23,089
(二月薪水)

961
00:51:24,724 --> 00:51:26,259
徹底搞不懂了...

962
00:51:28,661 --> 00:51:29,496
我會等著...

963
00:51:31,297 --> 00:51:32,599
你的郵件

964
00:51:32,599 --> 00:51:34,334
多久我都會等

965
00:51:35,468 --> 00:51:36,302
真的

966
00:51:37,270 --> 00:51:39,272
我習慣了被男人控制

967
00:51:42,142 --> 00:51:45,278
糟糕...我在說什麼?

968
00:51:47,981 --> 00:51:49,682
謝謝惠顧!

969
00:51:52,819 --> 00:51:54,521
妳能再給我一次妳的電郵嗎?

970
00:51:55,855 --> 00:51:56,656
什麼?

971
00:51:56,656 --> 00:51:59,759
妳看...妳上次喝醉了吧?

972
00:52:00,894 --> 00:52:02,195
我根本看不懂

973
00:52:08,168 --> 00:52:09,002
好!

974
00:52:09,002 --> 00:52:12,572
一個想被控制的女人
和一個想控制的男人

975
00:52:12,572 --> 00:52:15,708
這個搭配再合適不過了!

976
00:52:16,543 --> 00:52:21,514
僱用如此優秀的女孩卻不付薪水
真的很不人道

977
00:52:21,514 --> 00:52:25,585
所以龍甚至決定給她放個假...

978
00:52:25,585 --> 00:52:27,120
想吃什麼就點什麼!

979
00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:28,555
今晚我請客

980
00:52:31,524 --> 00:52:32,392
我說,麗莎

981
00:52:32,392 --> 00:52:33,293
什麼?

982
00:52:35,962 --> 00:52:39,098
我朋友在澀谷開了家店

983
00:52:39,098 --> 00:52:40,567
是一間進口貨商店

984
00:52:40,567 --> 00:52:42,869
人手不夠

985
00:52:42,869 --> 00:52:43,636
如果妳願意...

986
00:52:43,636 --> 00:52:45,205
我不會辭職的

987
00:52:45,838 --> 00:52:49,342
我想在龍之蘇打再工作一段時間
我喜歡衣服

988
00:52:51,945 --> 00:52:53,947
-我能來杯燒酒嗎?
-好的

989
00:52:55,882 --> 00:52:59,485
抱歉,我要去看演出

990
00:52:59,485 --> 00:53:01,221
你們想喝多少就喝多少

991
00:53:01,221 --> 00:53:04,524
有個特別的開場表演,我不能錯過

992
00:53:10,296 --> 00:53:11,130
抱歉

993
00:53:11,130 --> 00:53:12,098
為什麼?

994
00:53:12,865 --> 00:53:16,069
很多事我都要道歉

995
00:53:16,069 --> 00:53:17,503
免得妳再打我

996
00:53:17,503 --> 00:53:20,673
“我?打店長你?

997
00:53:20,673 --> 00:53:23,977
別傻了!那會弄疼我的手的!”

998
00:53:23,977 --> 00:53:27,714
畢竟,我欠你一個人情
因為你,我才認識了銀銀

999
00:53:28,248 --> 00:53:30,283
如果你沒有騙我

1000
00:53:31,017 --> 00:53:34,153
我還會變得黏人

1001
00:53:35,588 --> 00:53:39,092
銀銀會恨我的

1002
00:53:40,260 --> 00:53:41,995
“你真是男神

1003
00:53:42,562 --> 00:53:45,164
謝謝你騙我!”

1004
00:53:46,666 --> 00:53:49,569
不管銀銀有多性感

1005
00:53:50,336 --> 00:53:52,672
如果他恨我,一切都會付諸流水

1006
00:53:53,906 --> 00:53:56,909
我要好好珍惜他
這次他不會再逃走了...

1007
00:53:58,811 --> 00:54:01,648
我會讓他珍惜我的

1008
00:54:04,150 --> 00:54:05,018
麗莎...

1009
00:54:07,987 --> 00:54:09,155
妳叫他“銀銀”?

1010
00:54:09,155 --> 00:54:11,291
對,我叫他“銀銀”!

1011
00:54:11,958 --> 00:54:12,792
我知道

1012
00:54:13,326 --> 00:54:14,160
我知道

1013
00:54:15,561 --> 00:54:18,564
我知道!好!喝酒吧!

1014
00:54:22,935 --> 00:54:23,770
好!

1015
00:54:30,109 --> 00:54:31,744
我還是不喝了

1016
00:54:31,744 --> 00:54:32,645
為什麼?

1017
00:54:32,645 --> 00:54:34,914
“我不希望它再次成為一個夢”

1018
00:54:45,692 --> 00:54:48,761
說得好,黑幫老大!

1019
00:55:15,455 --> 00:55:17,890
喂,菜鳥,有片鴿子羽毛沒掃

1020
00:55:20,893 --> 00:55:21,894
嘿!

1021
00:55:25,832 --> 00:55:28,334
小虎介紹我在這裡工作

1022
00:55:28,334 --> 00:55:29,535
真的嗎?

1023
00:55:30,136 --> 00:55:31,971
好好努力,還清債務!

1024
00:55:35,608 --> 00:55:37,043
等等!

1025
00:55:37,043 --> 00:55:39,479
銀銀!等我!

1026
00:55:39,479 --> 00:55:41,280
妳太慢了!

1027
00:55:41,280 --> 00:55:43,883
這是你的義大利肉醬麵!

1028
00:55:45,284 --> 00:55:46,919
小虎

1029
00:55:47,453 --> 00:55:51,791
《芝濱》的故事幾乎都被你修改了

1030
00:55:51,791 --> 00:55:55,595
但觀眾很喜歡,所以我覺得挺好

1031
00:55:57,196 --> 00:55:58,097
謝謝師父

1032
00:55:59,932 --> 00:56:03,836
這是這個月的學費

1033
00:56:03,836 --> 00:56:06,606
好,謝謝

1034
00:56:11,511 --> 00:56:13,479
好,都在這裡了

1035
00:56:21,154 --> 00:56:24,390
非常感謝,我一定會還債的...

1036
00:56:24,390 --> 00:56:26,025
你就不能裝在信封裡嗎?

1037
00:56:26,626 --> 00:56:29,195
好的先生,我下次記得準備一個

1038
00:56:29,195 --> 00:56:33,566
我會的,對不起,我就放在這裡了

1039
00:56:37,403 --> 00:56:40,206
小虎,你提到的那個...

1040
00:56:40,206 --> 00:56:42,074
叫龍的店長...

1041
00:56:42,074 --> 00:56:43,543
這不關你的事!

1042
00:56:43,543 --> 00:56:44,677
討債身分還沒轉過來嗎?

1043
00:56:54,954 --> 00:56:58,524
我聽說你講《芝濱》講得很好
麗莎告訴我的

1044
00:57:00,560 --> 00:57:02,295
可以這麼說

1045
00:57:02,295 --> 00:57:03,362
我為你感到高興

1046
00:57:04,397 --> 00:57:05,498
謝謝

1047
00:57:08,868 --> 00:57:10,870
我要為上次的事道歉...

1048
00:57:11,370 --> 00:57:13,139
-我不知道
-不用放在心上

1049
00:57:13,139 --> 00:57:14,040
好,再見

1050
00:57:14,040 --> 00:57:17,176
急什麼?

1051
00:57:18,611 --> 00:57:22,548
嗯...挺尷尬的,這是個情人旅館

1052
00:57:22,548 --> 00:57:23,549
(明星才能)

1053
00:57:25,184 --> 00:57:26,219
小虎!

1054
00:57:28,955 --> 00:57:31,390
我們以前見過嗎?

1055
00:59:35,014 --> 00:59:38,985
{\an8}字幕翻譯:馬媛媛