# I walked across
# An empty land
# I knew the pathway Like the back of my hand
# I felt the earth
# Beneath my feet
# Sat by the river And it made me complete... #
See you in a minute. See you in a minute.
# Oh, simple thing... #
HE CHUCKLES Have we bought it?
# I'm getting tired... #
Are you ready for a bedtime story?
Mm-hm. This is An Essexmas Tale.
Mm-hm. Yeah?
It's the night before Christmas.
Well, a couple of weeks before Christmas.
And all through Essex,
snowflakes fall from the sky,
the only sounds are carollers singing
and the gentle jingle of sleighbells in the distance.
At an Essex mansion, young children are wild-eyed with excitement.
Not far away, friends gathered at a church,
their hearts filled with peace, hope, and the spirit of the night.
Meanwhile, the girls are having a blast,
dressed to the nines.
# And if you have a minute Why don't we go? #
Some folk call them The Mean Girls of Essex,
but Father Christmas knows better than that,
so he calls them Girl Band.
Children, with their mums, visit old people's homes,
sharing smiles and stories as they work together like elves,
making Christmas crafts, paper stars, and handmade cards.
# Somewhere only we know... #
They are spreading joy and warmth
and making sure people aren't alone this Christmas.
Is it nearly Christmas?
Really close.
Outside, laughter fills the air,
as three friends speed down snowy hills on toboggans...
..their cheeks rosy from the bitterness in the air.
Ah!
Back inside, trays of mince pies and Christmas cakes are baked...
They are? ..filling the air with sweet, spicy scents
that make mouths water and hearts melt.
Out in the cold, presents are being delivered all over town.
As the night deepens, a magical star appears in the sky,
brighter than any before.
Father Christmas sees the shining light.
With a knowing smile, he whispers,
"Something wonderful is happening tonight."
The end. # Somewhere only we know. #
# The only, only, only, only, only
# The only way is up, baby
# For you and me now
# Ooh-ooh-ooh. #
# Santa's coming to town... #
I'm holding it on his hip.
On his bow! If you move that hand any closer...
Whoo! LAUGHTER
Are you sure? Go, go, go, go, go!
One, two, three! Amber!
I feel like Harry's, like, the male model,
and we're just like, "Ooh." Yeah, we are.
Aw! I love that. Aw, I love.
ALL CHEER
# Santa's coming to town... #
Pick some baubles, and we're gonna put 'em on the tree.
Ooh.
LAUGHTER
# Ding-a-ding-a-ding-a tonight... #
Yah!
SHE LAUGHS Come on!
Yeah? Deal? Shake?
All right. Good man.
Christmas.
Make a wish. Make a wish. Close your eyes.
Oh! Here you are. I'll help you.
Oh, dear!
The star's a bit heavy for the tree, I think. Oh, no.
# Santa's coming for us Santa's coming for us... #
What a difference a year makes.
I know, mate.
One minute, you can barely eat your chicken wings.
One minute, you're crying into you chicken wings.
This is so exaggerated. I think you was very upset...
not even maybe six months ago, and now you're very happy.
You're throwing it back to me, but I'm just saying,
now you're in your matching pyjamas, you're decorating a tree. Yeah.
Well, yeah, look... You're a family of three.
Yeah, we're a family of three, decorating a tree.
And that's how quickly things can change.
And, look, it's a shame that I've gotta go to Bristol this year.
I should have told you a little bit earlier
so you could have made plans. This is fun. It's cool.
Nah, I wanna hold my hands up, that was my fault.
I should have made it more clear. It's hard to tell you, though,
when we've had such a good time living here, we've enjoyed it.
Normally, we have a nice little Christmas Eve
and spend it with each other.
We normally decorate the tree ourselves and do that sort of stuff.
No, it's fine. It's only something we've done every year
for the past so many years, but it's, you know,
times are changing, things, I suppose...
I'm sure you'll be able to find someone
to give you a bit of comfort at Christmas, eh?
I've got my dog, ain't I?
Don't start playing the sympathy card.
I've got my dog. Don't start rubbing your dog's ear.
We'll be all right, boy. DIAGS LAUGHS
Look at us!
Cheers. Cheers, brother.
We are growing up!
# Rockin' around... #
DOG WHINES # The Christmas tree
# At the Christmas party hop
# Mistletoe hung where you can see
# Every couple tries to stop... # CHUCKLING
Hi. Merry Christmas.
ALL: Hi!
Are you any good at doing stars?
# We'll have some pumpkin pie... # Yes, we've got them there.
Show them what you can make. Are you excited?
I've got my stocking ready. Have you?
# Get a sentimental feeling... #
I'm not being funny, I wanna go on this scooter.
Is it rapid?
Whoo! # Let's be jolly... #
Give Grace a cuddle. Oh, thank you, darling.
Aw, you're a lovely little boy. That's lovely.
Do you mind if I put it on, my angel? Yeah, yeah.
Right, let's get going.
You want a reindeer, babe?
# Everyone dancing... #
Do you know what's nice? It's nice to actually give.
Hundred percent. Like, coming here,
you gotta think maybe not a lot of their families might not be here.
I know.And to be here to support 'em, it's made their day.
And I'm more amazed, hundred years old.
Yeah, Harry, he fought in World War II.
Inspirational. For four years.
I felt honoured to have met him.
I feel like it's made me realise
I've been born in the wrong era, girls.
Yeah, I was meant to be born in the '80s.
I need a fella like this. Yeah, no, old school.
I asked for a bubble wreath to go on here.
# You will get A sentimental feeling... #
All right, P. You all right?
Polly, you look nice. How beautiful do you look?
Thanks. I just got ready. Did you?
You look so good. Yeah.
You look very Christmassy.
Thank you. Do you want one of these?
I want...
Do you want this one? Shall I help you?
Mum, can we start making these? Come and make them with me.
Ready? Open your mouth. Ready? No, no, no, no, I don't want one.
DOORBELL RINGS
# In the new old-fashioned way. #
ALL: Merry Christmas!
Is that Jordan? Millie!
Hello, my love. JORDAN: You all right, Ame?
Oh, thank you.
How are you? Ame, you look gorg. So do you, my darling.
Milly, it's Christmas time! It's Christmas!Whoo!
And we have had presents.
Merry Christmas! Come on.
Polly! Oh, so happy to see you. Hello, darling.
How are you? You all right?
Nice to see you, darling. Yeah, you? Yeah.
Oh, how are youse? Not bad, not bad, how are you?
Merry Christmas.You look so well, and so tanned, and so...
Can you believe I got a real tan? It's the Dubai life.
Dubai, three months. Right, who wants presents, then?
Yeah! Come on, then.
All come round. Pull that.
Ooh!
Hold on, one at a time.
Oh, open it up. Read 'em, read 'em.
Polly. Polly.
Who's that one for? Go on, Ame. Go on, Ames.
Billy.
Go on, Will, you can get the next one. Come on.
Millie. And then Harry, you can get the last one.
Where's Mills? Look at that. Harry, get the last one.
What do you say? Amy, do you wanna get the last one?
SCREAMS Go on, Will.
Come on!
It's happening! Oh, my God!
I'm pregnant!
SHE LAUGHS, HE SQUEALS
So... SQUEALS
SOBBING, LAUGHTER
JORDAN:I know. I know!
Oh, my God! I'm pregnant.
I couldn't wait to tell you.
WILL:That's such good news, babe.
It's happening. I can't believe. Jordan!
We're having a baby! We done it, man.
Thank you. We asked him today.
I know, he was on the phone. I asked him.
Can you believe it? I'm pregnant.
Oh. Oh, my God.
Look at that. Open that.
POLLY: What is it? Hey! Look at that.
POLLY GASPS Wait!
Sophie, you've got a baby. I'm having a baby.
She's having a baby! Wow!
Can you believe it?
Wow. I know. You're gonna have a cousin.
Oh, my God.
JORDAN:Give Soph a cuddle. Kiss the tummy.
You gonna kiss the little tummy? Go on. How exciting.
Wow. You can touch it.
It's not getting big yet, but it'll get very big very soon.
Obviously, it's been so hard,
cos we haven't really been seeing anyone.
Like, trying to keep things a secret is so hard.
It's the biggest secret we've had to keep from everyone.
Like, it is so hard, but... I'm going to get so emotional.
I just can't believe it's happening. HARRY: It's happened.
Mate, it's brilliant.
It's just been such a long time, and I never thought it ever would.
And then all of a sudden, like, a couple of weeks ago,
I was like, "Oh, my God. Jordan, I think it's happening."
And that was it. We've known for so long, cos we found out so early.
I just can't believe it.
But I've been dying to talk to you about everything that I'm feeling.
So the answer to your question is I will have a beer,
but can we get Soph a cup of tea? Yeah.
It was so hard to come to Amy's without having Prosecco as well.
Where's your drink? Right, let's actually...
Oi. How exciting.
Shall I get you a cup of tea to cheers?Have some milk.
Soph, here you are.
Have some milk. Cheers, milk.Aw, lovely.
Aw, cheers.
Right, to baby Brook, yeah? To the calcium.
Baby Brook! CHEERING
Come on.
# We can blame it On the mistletoe. #
# The only way is up. #
# Step into Christmas... #
I hate nature. I hate nature!
How have you copped out of this?
Well, think I'm wearing one of them, boys?
LAUGHTER Emily, I can't believe...
I'll watch this one. ..you've come so close.
LAUGHING
Whoo!
Woohoo!
Oh, it's funny!
How do I get back up now, though?
Whoo! Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Emily.
Oh, my God, no, don't turn around.
No, no, no!
No! No! Oh, my God!
It's going too fast!
Do you know what, Fred, I've had enough of this.
No more, guys. Let's get a drink. I think you might have had enough.
Yeah, come on, I'm gasping. I've had enough. Let's get a drink.
# Step into Christmas
# Let's join together We can watch the snow fall. #
Guys, that was a lot.
I still can't catch my breath.
It was great to watch, I must say.
We still don't understand how you managed to get yourself out of that.
I don't know how you expected any different.
You planned all of this.
Well, I know you're glam and don't really like getting your hands dirty
but I thought you was gonna take part. It's Christmas. Yeah.
What is Christmas like at the Bentleys'?
Yeah, so, we take it in turns, don't we? We do, yeah.
Obviously, our mum and dad aren't together,
so one year, we'll go to my mum's
and spend it with her side of the family,
and then the next year, we'll go to my dad's.
But this year, we're at my grandad's with Mummy's side.
Grandad's, in the new house.
In the new house, which is really exciting. Love.
And then you're going skiing on the 27th, in't you? I'm going skiing.
Are you?So this could have actually been great practice.
To be fair, and you copped out! But you copped out.
So you're the diva in the Bentley family,
and you're the best-looking one. SHE LAUGHS
Listen, she's gorgeous. She deserves it. You are stunning.
We are actually quite alike, though. You are so so alike.
So we're both good-looking, Fred. We are both good-looking!
LAUGHTER What are youse doing for Christmas?
So, we are gonna go to Terry's.
Second Christmas, really looking forward to it,
putting up a Christmas tree as well.
Do you reckon you're gonna be getting a ring this Christmas? No!
Really?!
Fred, it's been a year and a half. It's gonna happen soon.
But hang on a minute. It's gotta happen soon.
Do you think?
With gay mathematics, that's about ten-and-a-half years,
a year and a half.
It feels like I've been with him for about ten years, not gonna lie.
It would look good on you, though. I know, a big blinging ring.
Imagine him with a ring on his finger.
He'd be like, "You all right? My name's Junaid.
"Lovely to meet you." Who wouldn't know about it?
I know! The whole...
He'd walk in like that.
He'd walk in with his hand in front of his face.
"Congratulate me! Congratulate me!" Massive banner, "I am engaged."
No-one look at him, no-one talk to him!
Oh, God. Bless Joe. Make his life hell, wouldn't it?
LAUGHTER
I think you're such a breath of fresh air.
I'm so happy you're spending time with us.Thank you.
My little sister! Stop it!
Are you single? Oh, you are single.
You're not talking to that boy any more, are you?
No, no, single, single. Like, well and truly.
I feel like you need to meet everyone, Em.
I do. I do. Don't you think?
Oh, my God, the thought of my sister going out on a date.
Saying that, though, you know Ella.
Yeah, I know Ella.
Ella called me and Joe this morning. Right.
I think she's just a bit, like, nervous about being around everyone,
and, obviously, seeing you as well.
Harry Derbidge has, again,
for the second time, publicly embarrassed me.
Shock.
Ella has then screenshotted his story and sent it to me
in one breath, and in the next breath,
she's arranging to go out for dinner with him.
I have backed this girl, put my neck on the line for Ella multiple times,
and had her back. Yeah.
And I needed her to have my back one time, and she's let me down.
Like, and it's hard for me. Yeah.
It's hard for me. It is hard for you.
Because I loved Ella. No, I know you did.
Don't get upset. No. Sorry.
But I know how... It's frustrating for me.
No, I know, and I get it, though.
I know you're more hurt than anything, Fred.
And that's what the saddest thing about this is -
you were the best of friends.
I don't know how I'm gonna feel when I see Ella,
and I don't know how Ella's gonna feel when she sees me,
and I think it's just something that's gotta be played by ear.
RAIN PATTERING I could do with a brolly.
I'm really hopeful, and do you know what,
rain means good luck!
BOTH:Does it? Rain means good luck.
There we go, then. The heavens are open. There is...
There's a 90% chance that it's raining.
FRED LAUGHS
# Last Christmas I gave you my heart
# But the very next day You gave it away
# This year, to save me from tears
# I'll give it to someone special Special... #
Darling! Hello! You look so cute.
You need to come in quick, because I think my mince pies are burning.
I mean, smells great, but there is a hint of burnt.
Burnt. I know. I know. Oh, it looks so good, Ell.
It's been a lot. It's been a lot.
You've done a wicked job.
What is it? It's a bit burnt.
Oh, no.
They're burnt. You could just cut the top off.
HE LAUGHS Or I can send them to my haters.
Yeah, who would you give that to? All of them.
BOTH LAUGH
# Someone special, special. #
I'm feeling Christmassy. I'm feeling Christmassy.
It's lovely in here, though.
You've still got a bit of flour in your hair.
Yeah, it's... Babe, it's everywhere, all right?
LAUGHS Just use it to powder.
It's not dandruff, it's flour, OK?
You look really cute. I love it.
Thanks. You're like a little dolly.
You look well. Thank you.
It's been a long time.I haven't seen you since the charity event.
I felt like my emotions were really high at the charity ball.
Yeah, you were sad. Yeah.
I didn't like that.
I feel like that whole time was a lot for me, do you know what I mean?
I felt that I needed to take time out for myself
and have a bit of a break.
Mm-hm. So for about a month, I went to Spain with my mum.
Lovely. I sat and I spoke to my mum about how I feel about myself,
and how I feel about the situation.
Bit of soul finding. Yeah.
And, like, is there anything that I need to change for me?
And just, like, a bit of reflection. Yeah.
So, what's actually happened with Freddie?
Harry asked me if I was OK. Right.
And I said to him, "Yeah, just taking time out for me,
"I'll meet you when I get back if you want..."
Mm-hm. "..for a glass of wine, right?"
I invited Dani to come as well,
so it would have been me, Dani, and Harry.
I presume that's what's riled Freddie up.
That's what's riled Freddie up.
It's sad.
It is sad, because I think when I think of you,
I automatically think of Freddie, and vice versa.
So, obviously, last Christmas, me and Junaid was great in ourselves
but with everyone else around that table,
it was a really hard place to be.
Mm-hm.
I'm at a point, Ella, I'm so done talking about me and Harry,
the situation that it was.
I think the only thing that, like, hurts my heart... is Amy.
Mm-hm. I don't want a row with her.
I just wanna say, basically, it's just unnecessary now.
I feel like when stuff like that is being said by Amy,
I think she thinks it hurts you both.
Yeah, it does. Look, I'm... Because it is quite spiteful.
It's mean girl. I'm not NOT gonna say it's not spiteful,
because every time I see her, I do think,
"Oh, my God, please just have a day off."
The bottom line of it is, what's the goal? Mm-hm.
Where do you want this to finish?
Probably for youse two not be together.
But it's not gonna happen. No.
For their own happiness they need to just nip it in the bud.Yeah.
# Oh, Santa's gon' come And make him mine this Christmas
# Santa's gon' come And make him mine, mine
# Oh, Santa
# Santa's gon' come Make him mine this Christmas... #
Aw, this is so lovely. I know.
# Mine Santa, if you get this letter... #
Gang! Hi! Hello!
How are we? This is my sister by the way. Emily.
Hi, my love. Lovely to meet you all.
I feel like this is my favourite thing to do this time of year.
Me too! I need a mulled wine, ASAP.
# Baby, because every time I see Christmas lights
# I feel this void inside And I just can't take it... #
Whoo! Merry Christmas!
Babes. I'm so excited to see everyone.
I've missed you. Missed you.
Hello!
# This Christmas night... #
Daniel!
Merry Christmas! Yay!
Ho-ho-ho! LAUGHTER
# This Christmas. #
Couple of hot chocolates for us, thank you very much. Thank you.
This is so different to last Christmas.
Can I firstly just say that? This is completely different vibes.
Not everyone hates you this Christmas.
ALL:Yay!
It's a positive. We've got three more friends.
This is great. About time.
Forget the past. Let's not go over it.
Let's focus on the future.
Yes. Christmas this year, amazing.
What are your plans?
We are doing my family the week before Christmas.
Stunning. Nice.
Then we're gonna go to Bristol. It's about the kids.
Yes. Course it is.
For Bear, I'm gonna go to Bristol and spend Christmas down there.
Christmas morning, we're gonna be together
in the house - tree, presents.
I'll go get my boy, come back. Santa has to come to the house.
Yeah. So we'll do all that.
I wanna put the footprints on the floor so he thinks Santa's been.
Ring a bell outside his door.
Any presents on the horizon, James? A little ring, maybe?
I could say the same for youse two. I mean... you're a lot longer.
It is true. How do you find...?
Jodie's got Bear, Joe's got Dace. Did you find it quite hard?
In the beginning, it was, wasn't it? Yeah.
It's about spending time with him. We get on so well, like.
I think the way that you done it was the best way to do it. Yeah.
It happened very naturally. That's what I said to you, though.
The more effort you put in to kids, the more they give you back.
Yeah. Yeah.
Junaid was a little bit like, "I don't know what I can do."
All you've gotta do is play with him
and let him know that you're someone he can come and talk to.
I'm not trying to move in and be his new dad. Exactly, yeah.
Cos that's what, in your mind, it's like,
"I've gotta behave like this or be like the dad." It's not that.
He's already got his dad, know what I mean?
You're just there to just develop the relationship with the child.
They get comfortable with you,
you get comfortable with them, then it's natural.
Love does always win in the end, guys.
It does. It does.
It's so true, actually. I'm feeling right Christmassy now.
Yay! Let's pull a cracker.
LAUGHTER
# Love is all we need... #
ALL: Cheers. Merry Christmas.
# Love is everything... #
I would love a candyfloss.
There you go. Thank you.
# Love is all we need... #
Oh, what shall I have?
Whatever floats your boat, babe.
LAUGHS I'll have a gingerbread man.
OK, yeah. That's all right.
You can decorate it in your own time.
CHUCKLES How are you, you OK?
Yeah, are you? Yeah, good. I'm good.
Thank you. Lovely. You're welcome.
Well, our wine date has caused a little bit of a nightmare.
Well...
..obviously, I thought it was really nice.
Sorry, let me eat. Could be a bit dry.
I'm gonna actually... I might just put it down.Yeah, put it down.
Really lovely, but I'm gonna put it down.
Just a bit dry. LAUGHING: Just a bit.
I thought they looked a bit dry, anyway.
It was like, "Ooh!" Sorry about that.
Obviously, like, I thought it was really nice of you to reach out.
I know you congratulated me, like, on my brand.
I said to the girls, "Oh, my God, Ella reached out
"said congratulations, proud of you."Yeah, course.
That is so lovely, and it meant a lot to me,
because, obviously, I felt bad that I didn't support you
in times when you probably needed it,
but you still supported me when I needed it.
Yeah. I really do appreciate that, so a nice step forward.
Yeah. Same. But now I've got ten steps back with someone else.
HARRY SIGHS
I didn't even think of anything to message and say,
"Let's catch up." "Let's go for a wine." Yeah.
I thought it was fine. It's because of the photo that was posted.
I do regret posting that.
The last thing that I wanna do is get involved
in any of your messiness. I wouldn't allow you.
I know you care about Freddie and me.I always will.
You meeting me for a glass of wine was the cherry on the cake.
I never planned to meet up with you to get under Freddie's nose.
Me and Freddie were friends.
I do care about you, Ella, and I don't wanna see you on your own.
Thank you. I care about you.
And don't think that just because I wanna sort things out
between me and you is cos of me and Freddie not being friends.
No, I was...Because me and Freddie were friends then.
I was worried about that, cos I thought,
"Is she liking my pictures because she's fell out with Freddie?"No.
That did cross my mind. That's not in my make-up.
I don't do that.
Listen, me and Freddie aside,
if you wanna go for that glass of wine, get it back rolling...
Call me. All right. Enjoy.
Thank you for my gingerbread. Oh, yeah, nice but dry.
All right.See you in a bit. See you in a bit.
# It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas... #
Does anyone else want one? Mulled wine for one.
What's going on here? Oh, would you like a slice?
Depends what's in it.
Do you know what, they're all made with love.
Oh, are they, yeah? Homemade? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah. How are you?
I'm all right. Are you? Yeah, all right, yeah.
BOTH:Good.
CLEARS HIS THROAT
# Amore. #
# The only way is up. #
# Have yourself a merry... #
Oh, my char... Oh, I burnt it. Oh, fuck, it's on fire!
Harry, it's on fire! SCREAMING
Oh, Lauren!
# A merry little Christmas now... #
CLEARS HIS THROAT
So, what one you buying, then, Daniel?
Don't know. What shall I go for?
The school cake's beautiful.
I've never been a massive lover of school cake.
Right. That one ain't for you.
What's easy?
A cookie.
A cookie. I'd love a cookie. Jordan said they're great.
Oh, did he? All right. Yeah.
I'll trust his judgement.
It's a bit hard, working on your own.
Need a hand, don't you?
Yeah. It's the first job I've had for many years.
I'll bet it is, yeah.
What's the matter, got no-one to help you?
Nah, no-one's joining me. Fell out with everyone?
No.
No? No.
Yeah. No. No. Yeah?
You know, anyway. Freddie?
Yeah. How?
Because I planned to meet Harry for a drink.
Right.
And Harry posted something of Freddie.
Thing is, when you two are that close,
I don't really understand how these things come about.
But, listen, who am I to give advice to you anyway?
Yeah. You keep mates, you just don't keep birds.
BOTH LAUGH
You had to get one in, didn't you? Sorry, I couldn't help it.
I knew you was waiting for it. I was anxious, but I just said it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, I'll take it.
How's your life?
Yeah, good. Good.
How's Oliver?
Oliver's all right, yeah. Good.
Couldn't bring him today, but... Oh, that's a shame.
Yeah. He could have had a...
Oh, no, nothing, they've all got chocolate on.
Yeah. But, no, he's at home.
Cute. Yeah.
Come on, you can't do this on your own all day.
Are you gonna give me a helping hand? I'll give you a hand.
You can't stand here on your own. Shut the front door.
You got loads to sell. You can holler at people.
All right. Come on.
There's a lot to get rid of. You need some sort of deal here.
So, what, two for a pound? Two for a fiver?
It's for charity!
All right, two for a fiver.
I feel like you've got too much of an unapproachable look about you.
What do you mean?
Yeah, I might have a resting bitch face, but I'm not a bitch.
You need someone here with a smile, welcoming.
It's Christmas, know what I mean?
They're all gonna come over if you're here, let's be honest.
Bloody hell.
# I should be playing In the winter snow
# But I'ma be Under the mistletoe... #
I want a hotdog. I don't think they do hotdogs.
They do. What, a big old hotdog?
Where? A big one. I need it. Been a while.
LAUGHTER
# I'ma be under the mistletoe With you... #
It's gonna be the best Christmas ever.
I just can't believe we're gonna be parents.
Sometimes I do think, "What the fuck are we gonna do?"
I question it, yeah. I do think, "How on earth?"
Like, how do we know what we do?
You know, when you look at us, we're gonna, like, hold a baby.
I know. I know. You're good at it, but am I?
You are so maternal.
I've not been around too many kids.
You cut child's hair from birth.
But it is funny, when you talk about, like, the roles
and how we're gonna decide them, and what's gonna go on, cos...
No, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait.
No, no, no. I'm gonna put it out there,
There is no way in hell you're gonna get up at 5am.
I've admitted I'm not. HE LAUGHS
But I'll stay up till two.
Yeah, true.
And then I'll go to sleep. You can get up at five. Yeah.
And then... I mean, I'm carrying the baby for nine month, Jordan.
I know. So you can...
Don't I know it? You can do a lot.
You know you're never allowed to be tired any more? Yeah.
You're not allowed to feel unwell. I know.
You are not allowed to feel exhausted any more. I know.
Not be hungry any more. HE LAUGHS
Cos I am growing a limb, I'm growing a leg, I'm growing a heart.
If I hear the word nausea again...
I'll fucking nausea you, mate. HE LAUGHS
Hey! Girls, youse look amazing.
So do you, baby. You all right? Hello, Jode.
Merry Christmas. You OK? Hello, darling.
You all right? Yeah, good, thank you.
I've missed everyone. I know.
When was the last time we was actually all together?
It's been... Oh, God. A long time.
It feels like ages. When did we go abroad? Summer.
Portugal? No, yeah, we did after that.
Don't you think Elma looks a bit like Kate Middleton today?She does.
Classy. It's giving royal. It's giving regal.
The most unclassy here. You never dress like that, do you?
I think this is the new look, OK, Jordan?
Yeah? It suits you.
Youse three look like a girl ba... Can I say girl band?
Cos it's not the Girl Band, is it? Well, yeah, you can say girl band.
She's already in a girl band. No, I'm in multiple bands, OK?
Did you do a photoshoot thing?
How did you hear about this? Harry told me.
I heard about that, yeah. I think youse beat it.
Do you think? What do you mean?
Beat it. We're gonna beat it. Oh, we'll get a photo!
Me in the middle, then. So, how...?
Soph in the middle. Hold on, hold on.
The bag's gotta go. Hold on. We're gonna beat it.
My camera or yours? Mine.Everyone go that way.
We're gonna beat it. Ready?
Three, two, one.
I'm pregnant. GASPS
No, you're not. No, you're not. No, you're not!
I'm pregnant. No, you're not! Is she?
You're lying! Is she really?
Soph, I'm gonna have a heart attack. No, you're not.
Oh, my God, I'm having a heart attack.
LAUGHING, CRYING
Are you? Are you? Oh, my God.
I know! No, you're not.
Sophie, oh, my God. Sophie, oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Fucking unreal, innit? Can't believe it!
You're gonna be a mum! I know, I know.
Oh, my God.
I'm drinking no Prosecco. Oh, my God.
You're a fucking fibber.
No, man. I'm shaking.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
There's a baby in there, Sophie. There's a baby in there.
LAUGHING:I know! Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Can't believe it worked, it worked.
It's a Christmas miracle! It's a Christmas miracle! Look.
Do you wanna know when it's due? When? In June.
Oh, my God, you're gonna have either Gemini or Cancer.
Gemini. It's due on my mum's birthday.
When's your mum's birthday? 15th June.
Oh, my God, that's Bear's birthday.
No! Yeah.
Oh, my God! We can have a joint party.
Oh, my God. This is so beautiful.
We were pregnant at the same time. Oh, my God, this is so beautiful.
It's a winter baby, a winter miracle.
I can't believe it. I can't believe it.
Imagine what I've been going through.
Guys, I'm so happy for you.
Congratulations. Can you believe it?
I can believe it, but I can't believe it at the same time.
Can I trust you to not say anything? Not a word. Pinkie promise.
If James ask you. Give your lying face.
When James says, "What was you talking to Jordan?"
"We were having a catch-up about me and you and Christmas."
Say I got really emotional. Yeah.
I had a failed Tinder experience. Just say that. Yeah. Yeah.
Sounds believable, to be fair.
No, it is true, it happened! LAUGHTER
It's the best present ever, isn't it?
# It's Christmas time for you and I
# We'll have a good night And a merry Christmas
# It's Christmas time For you and I... #
Merry Christmas, everyone. ALL:Merry Christmas!
Merry Crimbo!
Oh, candyfloss at Christmas.
Special one for you, they light up.
Yes! Thank you.
What is that, a little glow stick, yeah?
Oh, you can use that, Lauren. What am I gonna use it for?
LAUGHTER
# And a merry Christmas time. #
Hi.
Are you OK?
Yeah, you? I'm all right.
I'm all right. Obviously...
..it's shit, all of this. Mm-hm.
And how it's got like this between me and you, cos, obviously...
we held a lot of love to each other, for each other.
We did. I think for me, I feel...
I felt disappointed.
Because Harry publicly embarrassed me on social media,
you screenshot the story and sent it to me.
Yeah, I did, because why would I look at it
and not send it to you? Of course I'm gonna send it to you.
So why didn't you let me know you was going out for dinner with him?
That weren't a plan made then, though.
It was two... It was two days later.
Two weeks. It wasn't, Ella, it was two days later.
I've got it on my phone, Fred. So have I. Dani told me.
Yeah, she was invited. Mm-hm.
I told her to come.
So I don't understand why you would...
If you feel like me and you weren't friends,
you're letting me know Harry's publicly embarrassing me,
yet arranging...I never said that me and you wasn't friends.
I haven't changed from the moment that I met you
to five years down the line.
I have still been the same person, Freddie.
Do you honestly think that, hand on your heart,
you was the same friend to me from the beginning
to the end of our friendship? Yes.
I don't feel like you've taken accountability
for the way you've made me feel. What do you want me to do,
get on my hands and knees and say,
"I'm sorry, let me worship the ground that you walk on"?
A simple sorry. I already done that.
What are you talking about? Do you think this is about that?
I loved you like my fucking sister, Ella.
I would have done anything for you. You don't show that, though.
How can you say that? I've fallen out with the whole group for you.
Off of your own back. Because you're my friend!
What aren't you getting? But you made it awkward for me, too.
You don't need to shout at me. I'm not here to shout.
I'm frustrated. I'm not here to get frustrated.
You're not looking at it from my point of view.
But I don't feel as if I needed to have your back in the Harry thing
because it's pathetic.
How many times have I told you?
Pathetic that he's publicly embarrassing me.
You knew that would make me feel, though, Ella.
We have seen this photo ten times over.
You should laugh at it and think, "Boring."
But at the end of the day, listen, at the end of the day,
it's not that I want you to stand here and say thank you
for everything you've done.
What my point is and what I'm trying to make clear is
that, naturally, whether you say for me to have your back or not,
I would have automatically had your back,
which I have multiple times in our friendship because I loved you.
And I don't care whatever you say, whether you think I've used you,
whether you think that I didn't love you.
I know I loved you, that is why I backed you.
Yeah, I feel like you loved me because of what I come with.
And what's that, Ella? And what's that?
Well, where you are now. It's not that hard to read.
Everyone says it, everyone thinks it too. No, they don't.
To you, they might not, but to me, they do.
They obviously say different for you. OK, and that's fine.
I never wanted to see you in that light.
I see you in that light now
because I feel like I don't know you any more.
My friendship with you is down in the dumps.
Yeah, of course it is. Out with the sewer.
You don't hold the cards to our friendship, for sure.
I don't want to hold no cards.
At the end of the day, I think it's very much a mutual...
I'm on a self-healing journey. That's good.
What happens is the shit takes itself out.
I cut you out, so don't get it twisted.
OK, fine, you cut me out.
So be it. Lovely. Love that from you.
I think... After someone doing so much for you.
What have you done for me? You've done nothing for me, Ella!
I'm the one that's done so much for you. I'm had your back!
What, yeah, jumping down everyone's neck cos you like an argument.
They gave you a hard time! Because you like a row.
I don't like an argument. I loved you.
And you lost a good fucking friend in me.OK.
Not the other way round. Don't get it twisted.
OK, fine. Merry Christmas, Ella.
Merry Christmas to you too, Fred. Merry Christmas, babe.
# All alone on Christmas Eve
# I don't wanna be alone I don't wanna be alone. #
# The only way is up. #
# Tangled up in tinsel with you
# Walk, talk, and deck all the halls
# Wrap each other up In paper and bows... #
Aw! Oh!
Yeah!
Aw! Oh, kiss! SOPHIE LAUGHS
Oh, go on. Go on.
Aw!
So, how are you?
I'm really good, Sam. Congratulations.
I haven't seen you since. Congratulations.
Yeah, amazing news, isn't it? It's just... I know.
Absolutely amazing. Absolutely amazing.
I've cried loads. Have you cried? Just cried all the time, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.I think it's because of what they went through
to have this pregnancy as well.
Yeah.I've been to a lot of appointments with her,
seen a lot of heartache, a lot of tests being done.
It's been a long time coming. It's been a long time coming. Yeah.
So, I'm thinking boy. What are you thinking?
Er... She's so desperate for a girl. Yeah.
Are you thinking boy? Yeah.
Really? I don't know why.
Just from when she told me, I just said to Jordan,
"It's... I think... I think boy." Yeah.
I think Jordan's gonna be pretty hands-on,
I think he's gonna be proper involved.Absolutely.
I think he'll have to get Sophie quite organised.
LAUGHTER
We know Sophie's messy. I know, she's very messy.
What's happening there? I'm already thinking about that.
She can't be messy when they've got this little one running around,
they really can't.
That's where I get brought in. Yeah.
I'll be brought to clear the mess up. Yeah.
The cleaning and the sterilising and everything.Yeah.
And she likes her sleep, she likes eight hours a night.
How's she gonna get that when she has a baby is beyond me.
No. Exactly.She doesn't have her eight hours now, she's aggy.
We're not doing very well, are we? We're not doing well, are we?
Hello. Hi!
We were just saying, wonder when you were gonna join us.
How are you? Lovely to see you.And you.
Lovely to get together for afternoon tea. I know.
How is everyone? Yeah, good.
We need a catch-up. Kids good?
Yeah. Yeah. Not bad.
We had a similar setting, didn't we? We did.
The last time we met. Oh, yeah.
The Safari Park, when I fed a giraffe.
LAUGHTER It was good.
And I met Jodie's little boy, Bear, which was really lovely.
He's so cute. Aw, lovely.
So you're not worried about losing Jodie to Essex or anything,
she's still got her roots where she is? Oh!
You know, at the end of the day, you just want them to be happy.
Course you do. Of course, yeah.
And that's all matters, isn't it, at the end of the day?
That's lovely. James seems to be becoming a grown-up, finally.
Don't be ridiculous, Debs. Come on, don't be silly.
It is just a miracle. I love Jodie.
Cos she seems to have, like, reined him in, finally.
Someone's reined him in, finally. So, yeah, we'll see.
How's Harry doing? Harry's all good.
Yeah? Is he good? He seems in a really good place now.
He does. Thank God for that.
Excuse me, ladies, I'm gonna get some tea.
Yeah, very relaxed now and all that's all gone now.
I think it's lovely, all our kids... Dan's doing really well, in't he?
Yeah, yeah, he seems to be...
He looks really like he's lost a lot weight.
I know, yeah, he's got into his fitness.
Eunice and I were chatting earlier cos Jordan and Sophie
have got to start to get themselves really, really organised.
Because... We've got something to tell you.Yeah.
What you got to tell us? It's a surprise.
Oh, go on, tell us. They've got Baby Brook on the way.
Really? Oh, my God!
Oh, my God. No way!
She's pregnant!
Yes, at last!
Finally. That's amazing.
Oh, my God, that's such good news. Well done.
Oh, my God. Finally.
I am so happy. Aw, it makes me wanna cry.
So adorable. Isn't it amazing?
Aw, so pleased.
ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER
That is so lovely.
I think we need to raise a glass to that.
You can raise your tea, that's it, well, yeah.
ALL: Cheers!
And a beautiful baby. Cheers to the nanas.
# Santa, can you hear me? #
He can sing, Em. He is... I've heard.
I need to make my own opinion on this singing voice. OK, perfect.
When's the next gig? Oh!
OK! I love this, Emily.
Welcome to Christmas!
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
THEY CHEER
Be goofy, be goofy.
# Santa, that's my only wish This year. #
So, what's been happening? Well, nothing.
Just been working, singing. Same thing, innit?
Just getting ready at Christmas, singing loads at Christmas.
Do you like Christmas? Yeah, it's good, innit?
You must be ramo at Christmas. I feel like that's normally like me.
I've literally just got rid of my shops,
and normally, Christmas is, like, the busiest time.
But you're always busy, in't you? I am always busy.
You are always busy, in't you?
Working you are, in't you? You are always busy.
I am always busy. Well, mainly just being a mum, babe.
It's good. It is good.
But do you know when you feel like you need to find your calling?
I feel like I've done lash since I was 17. I'm now 28.
I feel like that's not the passion any more.Want something else?
I feel like I've got a bigger calling, babe,
and I don't know what it is yet.
Singing. Oh, do you think I was so good?
Go for it. Listen, you would... I'll be a Priscilla tribute act.
You would nail it every time. Do you think?
Yeah, one million percent.
Do you think anyone can sing,
or do you feel like you've got to learn it?
No, I think you've got it. I just think... Listen.
A couple of little... but the thing is
it's just a bit of confidence, and bang,
you'll be out there like swimwear. I've got that, haven't I?
You have, in't you? I've got that.
Yeah, definitely. What else do I have?
Everything. Do you think?
The looks, personality. You have got the full package.
Do you think? Yeah, you've got it.
What would you give me out of ten? Solid ten.
You are a solid ten, in't you? Is that it?
But you graft hard, you work hard, you got... in't you?
Your morals are there, you've got everything,
you tick every box.
You see, with you, I know, like, we've been messaging,
we've been having a little, like, whatever,
but I feel like I am not the bird that you could just say on that day,
"Right, where are you? Come here, da, da, da."
I am quite organised, I'm quite strict.
Like, see, with my daughter, very... people get me misconstrued.
Course they don't. I'm very strict.
Like, bathtime's at that time, your dinner's at that time,
bed's at that time, like, very funny with it.
So I feel like I need you to be a bit more organised.
Like, if you wanna see me, you're gonna have to plan it.
Instead of going, "Ah, what do you wanna do?"
Like, you need to tell me. Course.
"Babe, this time, here, there." If I was a little bit more...
But I can do a date if you're a bit more organised.
Listen, I'll be organised. Are you?Yeah, of course.
Well, put your money where your mouth is.
Babe, I'm ready and waiting. Do you think?
One million percent, ready and waiting.
If I'm a little bit more organised...
Then we'll go from there. ..I might get through the net.
You might get through the net, babe. Yeah? Yeah.
Cheers.
Happy Christmas. Happy Christmas, my love.
Right, you gonna come with me? Yeah, I'll come. Let's go.
# I gotta go away Baby, it's cold outside... #
Bah humbug, how about that?
Joe. Yeah. Wow.
Ready? ALL:Ahh!
Mm. Tasty.
Too much, Harry, come on.
I feel like I'm at school, like I can't deal with it.
# It's cold
# Baby, it's cold outside. #
We always talk about how we feel, right? Yeah.
And it's Christmas. Yeah.
I always get emotional, I always cry.
Don't no. But... No.
Don't get emotional again this year.
No, but... I don't care if you get emotional,
but I haven't actually cried yet at Christmas, yet.
Yet. But I do want to talk to youse both
because you both, I've had the worst year in the world,
without getting upset, yeah?
Yeah. The worst year in the world.
But... with everything that went on with the business,
everything that's going on with me and Soph,
and youse have repeatedly, repeatedly, repeatedly
always been there for me, yeah? Yeah.
Christmas is for giving,
and youse have both been there for me.
That's for you, and that's for you,
I'm gonna get emotional. You got me a present?
I've got you both a present. What?
Take them two coins, and I want you both to open them.
Put your beers down. I want you to both to open them
because you have been there for me continuously.
This year especially. Wait, what do I do with that?
No, no, no, open the string, and it's a scratch card.
I thought it was a scratch card
like you get down the local. No, it's not bingo.
Hopefully, I win fucking 50 million. Scratch it, scratch the tree.
Scratch it. Scratch the tree together.
SCRATCHING
No fucking way!
No way!
Are you joking me? No, mate.
No fucking way. Really?
No way! DIAGS LAUGHS
No way!
No way, mate. Oh, are you winding me up? No?
Fucking hell.
Mate, we said, what would be the perfect thing?
DIAGS MUMBLES
We've set him off now. Jesus Christ. Fucking God.
THEY CRY
Aw, mate. I'm so happy for you, honestly.
No way.
I fucking... Well, when did this happen?
What the fuck! Look at me, man!
I mean, I'm fucking...
I was making jokes about it. You fucking...
Fucking joked about it.
No way, man. I did it.
I did it. I did it. I did it. He fucking did it.
I'm so happy for you, man.
Aw, fuck. Mate, what the fuck?
Come on. Mate, he's crying again on Christmas.No, I'm not.
I did it. What the fuck, mate?
Boys, you're gonna be Uncle Diags and Uncle Dan. Jesus Christ.
I'm having a baby. Fucking hell, man!
THEY LAUGH
# It's the most wonderful time Of the year... #
HUSHED:I'm pregnant! Yeah!
I'm having a baby!
Think I'm gonna be a good mum? I love youse.
I can't stop smiling. I feel like a Cheshire cat.
Hello! Oh, Elma.
Hello! Where am I seated? Chloe, you're there.
Wow. What?
Why am I not next to my friends? What?
I'm sitting next to Amber. Yay!
I miss you. Chlo, who are you sitting next to?
Lauren and Ella. Oh, God.
Can we swap a few name tags around? Who would you move?
Do I really want Ella in my eyeline? Absolutely not.
Amber, it is Christmas.
What's happening?
Yes, what's happening? Merry Christmas.
This is cute.
Oh, is there a card? Yeah, don't open it yet.
You have to leave it. Traitors vibe, so leave it.
You have to murder someone at the dinner table.
Murder! Who would you murder?
Mate, I'd murder Jordan.
Excuse me! You will not murder my boyfriend.
Well, welcome to your first Christmas dinner.
Strap in, darling. Strap in.
Yeah! Welcome.
Hello, everybody. Hello!
Merry Christmas. Come here, son. You all right?
Ah, I'm next to Freddie. Aw.
Your best mate. You love him, don't lie.
Ooh! You love it. Ooh!
The table looks so long.
One big happy family. Dysfunctional.
Dysfunctional. 100% dysfunctional.
Listen, he's right in the thick of it.
That's the worst place for me to be.
What would you rather - Freddie or them two?
I mean, yeah, I'll take Freddie.
Whay!
Hi, welcome to dinner.
Whoo! Well, this is cosy.
I love that suit so much.
What is going on?
What a lovely little treat you've got, darling.
It's too much. It's too much.
I'm laughing.
You're in the thick of the drama, in't you? He always is.
Yeah, I know, but this is a bad place for me to be.
CHEERING
Here's the love birds! How lovely.
What a touch.
Thought it was gonna be you, Ell. You're all right.
Yeah, we've got everyone.
Cheers. It wouldn't be the same cheers if we didn't.
Attention! Attention. Ready, er, attention!
What? Can I have everyone's attention?
All I wanted to say is on behalf of me
and as everyone likes to call us, Girl Band,
would you like to open your cards that are in front of you?
Oh, so you've done this.
CHEERING, LAUGHTER
Come on, Harry. Harry!
So cute. I love it!
No, that's too... No, don't do that. Let me see. Let me see.
Don't rip it up, Freddie. How embarrassing?
Aw, they look amazing. I'm putting it on my fridge.
Merry Christmas.
Right, at the end of the day, I don't like Harry,
so anything Harry's associated with, I don't wanna be a part of.
TAPPING It's not really glass.
Oh, speech! It's time.
Wait, wait, wait, we wanted a Christmas speech, right?Yeah.
Listen, right, Christmas is a time for us all to come together, right?
I want everyone to enjoy their Christmas dinner
and have a good day and have a drink up,
and there's a present from me in all of your Christmas crackers...
And me. And Soph.
If everyone can pull your Christmas crackers together.
Ready? One...
Go. CRACKERS SNAP
SCREAMING
Oh, my God! SCREAMING
Are you joking? We did it!
Are you joking? Are you joking?
Oh, Soph! We did it!
I'm so happy for you. Thank you.
We've got a baby coming! CHEERING
It's been the hardest journey in the world
that's ended on such a positive... Such a good.
..beautiful... Fucking hell, sorry.
ALL:Aww! JORDAN CRIES
You are... Ugh! Come on.
..hands down, the strongest woman I've ever met in my life.
We'll bring this baby into the world, the most loved baby ever,
so Merry Christmas, everyone.
ALL:Cheers! CHEERING
Come on! Yes!
# Those Christmas lights
# Keep shining on. #
# The only way is up. #
# Candy Cane Lane Bring a friend this holiday
# Bring a friend who loves to play
# We'll eat all the candy canes
# Oh, Candy Cane Lane Bring a friend this holiday... #
Oh, here's the big turkey!
SING-SONG:Time for food!
Aw, I'm having a hot flush.
That is so big!
I haven't had a Yorkshire pudding. Where did you get that?
Oh, thank you so much.
Who's got the potatoes?
You're gonna be a good dad, Jord. Look at him, carving a turkey.
Come here, son, I'll show you how to do a bird.
It looks like your one, Fred. Mine's smaller than that, girl.
When can WE have a baby? When you get me pregnant.
JUNAID LAUGHS
DIAGS:Do you know what?
This has... This has actually been mad, all this stuff.
Is it making you broody? Yeah. It actually is.
Being serious.
The euphoria of what they are going through, I want that.
You want that now. Tomorrow, you won't.
No, I will. I think... I think I do want that.
It is the best feeling ever.
So, you wanna start baby making? I think I do.
Love you. Love you.
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas.
Right, this is your first Brussel sprout, right?
He ain't gonna like it.
No, chew it and swallow it.
It's rock hard. Chew it!
DAN LAUGHS
Just chew it. Chew it. FREDDIE GAGS
Freddie! Urgh!
Right, so, Ell. Fucking hell. Yeah?
How are you doing after the last couple of days?
I feel all right. Are you?
Yeah. I actually feel all right. Do you know what I feel like?
I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.
Mm. Yeah, cos there's things
that I wanted to say, obviously, face to face.Yeah.
And not, like, over text
so nothing can be misconstrued or anything like that.
So, you're actually done?
I'll be honest, like, I do think that it does look a little bit...
This is from an outsider's point of view, obviously,
I don't actually know the ins and outs.
It does look a little bit like, erm...
..he was your best friend while it suited him,
and then he's got on the scene and got other friends
and kind of been like, "You don't really serve me a purpose any more."
Yeah, that's how I feel.
That is a little bit how it looks, I'll be honest.
See, I just don't see it like that at all.
I think you two... you two were so good,
I just think that it's so not worth this.
I don't. I just don't see no way out of it.
Oh, she's talking about it. Ella?
My ears are burning!
But saying what?
Just about both situations I suppose, I dunno.
But, listen, they're always gonna have Harry's back, though.
Like, it's hard for me cos I love you, and I love Harry, so...
This ain't about me getting anyone involved.
No, of course not, no. I'm just like...
But it's hard, do you know what I mean?
Hi.
Getting closer to the Band. Hey!
And Ella. Ha! Yeah. And the plus one.
Erm... How are you?
I'm all right. Are you? Yeah, OK.
How's that end? Yeah. Yeah, Amy's fine.
It's nice for us cos, like, this is like a lovely table
cos we're all celebrating Sophie and Jordan. Yeah.
I'm bloated now.
What are you thinking?
Just awkward. With?
WHISPERS: Amy. What do you think?
I dunno, see, I feel like I need to talk to her.
You got this.
Elma, you all right, honey? Yeah, babe.
Can I come and sit here? Is that all right?Of course.
Shit, Joe's talking to Amy.
You OK, Amy? Hey.
You all right? Yeah, good.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
How's things? You all right?
Babies all right? Yeah, thanks, it's all good.
Erm, so much has happened in such a short period of time,
and I... Look, I am sorry.
I've said sorry to Harry.
I am sorry I upset you in the process.
I think he said sorry. Yeah. He's apologising.
What is going on? I'm not sure.
I think it's something to do with Amy
talking about Joe and Junaid on socials all the time.
Yeah, but they've...
Joe and Junaid are a lot worse.
I did think a lot of you, but I just think now,
cos so much time has gone past,
I just think the online stuff's hard,
like, the constant, like, commenting on stuff,
but not solely from you, it's from everyone that was involved...
Was it...? I don't know what you're saying about the online commenting,
because you slate Harry all the time on social media.
Oh, my God, social media is literally the root to all evil.
But as a cousin, I protect Harry, and I'll always, always protect him.
Yeah, I get that. You know?
I think, right, what this is, and I am known...
Lauren, I'm so sorry. No, of course.
I love you so much, I'm so sorry, I know you love Joe, whatever.
But remember what you done with Harry.
You shit on him massively. Yeah.
I'm here to just try and move forwards.
I wanna put it to bed.
Joe, he just wants to talk besides
and tell you he apologises, and he did really love you,
and I know it's not gonna take away what happened.
I'm not expecting to be friends I just want to put it to bed.
I'm so sorry, it's been... it's quite embarrassing
because how could me and you be mates with what you done to Harry?
I don't expect to be mates.
But you're gonna say, "I'm so sorry," whatever, but...
He misses you. We're all adults at the end of the day.
He's gutted because once upon a time...
But we was only friends cos you was with Harry,
so what is all that about?
You still had a friendship.
It's also been a year and a half, and it needs to be put to bed now.
You're never gonna be my mate, Joe, so...
No, we know that. Let's leave it at that.
I know it's hard. So, what are you actually saying, then?
I'm asking to put everything to an end
and stop the social media stuff for everybody's sake.
But you do it as well, Joe. What's she done on social media?
Saying karma's gonna come and get us and...
But is she talking about you? She might be talking about anyone.
No, these two.
I'm only gonna protect Harry
cos you've got your boyfriend protecting you.
I'm only gonna protect that guy there cos he...
who I absolutely love, who's my cousin. I expect you to.
And thank you very much. All right, sweet.
Can you go now? Thank you.
You can go. Thanks. LAUREN:I think...
it's brave of you to come over and say it.
No, Joe, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, let me say one thing.
Babe. Junaid. One fucking thing.
ALL GASP You... No, hold on.
I'm saying one thing. I ain't starting on anyone.
Junaid, just leave it. No, I'm not starting.
Leave it. Just leave it. You've been...
You've apologised, that's all you can do.
It's fine. Junaid, how did he apologise?
You were sleeping together when you was with Harry.
I'm gonna protect him... You will always protect him.
And that is what you're gonna do, you're always gonna protect him.
Of course, of course, and we weren't saying that.
Junaid, listen. Listen. Listen. Genuinely. We don't want bad vibes.
He just wanted to apologise. Listen.
But sometimes, apologies don't get accepted.
That's so fine, so fine. No, but, listen, I'm not asking for...
Listen, youse two... youse two have ruined him massively,
and I've had to deal with... I had to pick the pieces up,
what you've both done to him.
And do you know what, Amy? And I totally respect that,
and genuinely, from the bottom of our hearts,
what we have done a year and a half ago, we are so, so sorry for.
We have apologised to every single person on this table.
It was nothing out of intent or maliciousness, what we done.
Joe and you, once upon a time, had a friendship
when he was with Harry, and that is it.
Babe, he was so good at a blow-dry, done, thank you.
Let's move on.
Next time you need a blow-dry, I think you should go to Joe
because everyone always says he's good at it.
Let's put it to bed. That's it. No bad vibes.
Harry, Harry, I apologised to you a few months ago...
I didn't bring this up. I know you didn't, babe.
I literally apologised to you a few months ago.
It's like... It's just... It's just, like, don't...
I have got noth... I genuinely... Junaid, just stop now. Just stop.
..have got not a bad word to say about anyone.
Can I come over? Come over. Let's have a...
Come over, Let's have a chat, please. Come over.
I know that you love him, whatever, whatever, I'm sorry, Lauren.
Listen, but I love you as well, and I get it, but the thing is...
It's too much.
I wanna sit down and say to you,
me and you had this conversation six months ago.
We've had this conversation.
And I have no bad vibes towards you at all. And it's fine, it's fine.
But since that, there's been Joe's social media posts,
going mad about me on his story. What did he post on social media?
So then everyone's protective over me.Of course.
You know Amy's protective over me. A million percent.
And you're protective over Joe. No, a million percent.
That's fine, and that's fine.
So, you can't then be going, "You're doing this on social media,"
when your fella's being worse. No, I'm...
No, but you can't... It bends three ways.
You did, about mugging me off. But you do it all the time.
You posted videos of you crying literally the other day.
No, but it's true.
He can't practise what he preaches, though.
He's having a go at people for posting on social media,
but he posted about me on social media.
I want this to end, and listen, listen, and listen,
we... listen, listen, I want this to end.
Harry, Harry. I want this to end.
CHAIR SCRAPES
Harry. Harry. ..apologise to you.
Can we sit? Listen, it's irrelevant now.
Just come, ignore it, ignore it, ignore it, ignore it.
I want it to end. I want it to end. I want it to end.
Harry, listen! Harry!
No, you're not his friend.
VOICES FADE
# The only way is up. #
We were friends. I don't want this. Harry.
You're not his friend, sit down. Junaid, just...
I want this to end. Let's all chill now. Chill now!
I want it to end, please. Chill out. Harry, sit down!
It needs to be put to bed.
It's been a year and a half. Sit down, Harry.
Harry, ignore it, ignore it. Harry, sit down.
Oh, my God, I've got gravy on me.
I just want to... Same.
Fucking hell, it's been a year and a half.
You didn't need to do that cos it's made it worse.
Listen, it's really hard.
I understand Harry's side, I understand Amy's side,
I understand Joe and Junaid's too,
and then at the same time, it's like they can't ever forget
what they have done to Harry because no-one's dropping it.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
The thing is for me, right, I'm a lot stronger,
and I won't have someone talk down to him.
You hurt the people that I love, I will fucking hurt you. I know.
Don't ever speak to my boyfriend and say "You can go now".
Of course. No.
You can fucking go. I understand.
And that's why I stood up. You're angry.
That's why I stood up. I get it.
I know you're defending me.
I ain't gonna have anyone speak to you
like you're fuck all cos you ain't.
But that was about Amy and Joe's relationship.
Because she also was hurting. I know, but she's gonna say that.
I can see the defence in her because she's got to protect Harry.
So your anger to them is gonna be different to Joe's.
I know you're together, and you're a team,
and I'm your best friends, I love you both.
Like, why is everyone bare aggy?
At the end of the day, the way I look at that situation is,
I went over to Amy, and it genuinely come from my heart.
That was unfinished business that they've never spoke about.
And they've had that unfinished business now.
Ta-ra, crack on with your life, leave him alone.
You'd think after everyone gets that good news,
they maybe would not row in front of you and the baby, but...
It's a shame, isn't it?
Cos Junaid is quite funny, but it's just Amy, isn't it?
CHATTER
No, it's nothing to worry about. No, I know.
But he's just... He can switch so bad.
Well, at least it ain't me and you arguing at the table.
I miss you a lot, Ella. I miss you. I do miss you.
So, what, like, gravy do you use, then? What's your...?
Shall I tell you the truth?
They use Bisto.
Just enjoying my wine. Enjoying your wine.
I wish I'd topped up more. Wish that bottle was back.
Next to the bottle. What do you mean?
Do you mind if I swap seats with you, girlie?
I didn't know you was gonna move my bird.
Hi. You OK?
Yeah, I'm good.
I just obviously wanna clarify a few things.
Yeah, of course.
We had our disagreement in Portugal,
we come back to Essex, I apologised for that.
Yeah.And then you're publicly embarrassing me online again
with the same picture, and it's the second time you've done it.
I think... I think you're forgetting a little bit of the chapter.
What's the chapter?
So, you apologised, which I thought was really lovely of you,
but after that, then I see you...
Dan's hair launch. And we spoke. Dan's hair launch.
You kind of give it to me a little bit.
I didn't. You ran back to people,
you was all laughing about me.
Harry, but we was never friends again. We were civil.
And then you called me Mr Victim.
"Oh, he's playing a victim again. There he goes, playing the victim."
Which you do a lot. Do you know what I mean?
But you say things... But I apologised for it.
But so... so saying sorry is fine, it's really lovely,
but don't say sorry and then go and say shitty things.
That isn't the truth, though. It is the truth.No, no.
I called you a victim prior to saying sorry.
No, you done it after. No, I didn't.
You done it after.
Why don't you just take accountability
for you making me feel like shit?
Why don't you take accountability? I always take accountability.
Everyone knows I'm the first to say sorry.
I'm gonna be honest with you, listen. I...
I should never have put that post up about you.
Yeah, you shouldn't have. And I take that accountability.
If it was the first time that you publicly embarrassed me
with that picture... Like, last year, you said sorry
for publicly embarrassing me for that picture.
A year later, you're saying sorry again,
so, for me, it doesn't feel genuine.
It's like a fake sorry. I-I...
I'm not saying a fake sorry, I'm actually saying sorry
because I feel like it's just... it was a bit muggy.
But in the same... It was very muggy.
It was, though.
Ella. Is your friendship with Freddie, like, dead in the water?
Yeah.
No coming back?
Listen, I don't want to argue with you.
I don't want your apology. I want you to leave me alone.
Leave my name out of your mouth... HARRY SCOFFS
..because all you wanna do is dig me out constantly.
All right, Fred. Bye, then. See you later.
Look, don't shoo me away. No, see you later, then.
I'm gonna stay now on purpose.
I was being nice to you, and you were getting muggy.
You wasn't. You went, "I might be sorry."
You're giving me a half-hearted apology.
I'm not interested in it. OK. OK, bye.
No, no, no, no, no, no. Sorry. All right. No.
I just... I don't want to deal with it.
No, cos you're doing exactly what I just said to both of you earlier.
You're both sassy, you're both sassy, you're...
But, listen, at the end of the day, Elma,
I'm really struggling to accept his apology
when he's said it twice. You both do it each time.
He's done it to me twice publicly.
It's fine, it's fine. Listen.
I know. I know it's fine. Don't... Listen, listen.
Careful where you're grabbing. Listen, listen, careful.
Careful. Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
Fucking hell. I reckon we agree to disagree.
Let's just draw a line under it. Merry fucking Christmas.
Oh, my God.
Listen, I just won't... I've never spoke about you behind your back.
I've always said it to your face. Harry, stay. H, come here.
I'm not talking to you. OK. Bye.
I think, Freddie, you've said what you've got to say,
now move forward.
Yeah. Clearly, you ain't gonna be friends.
Do you know what I mean? No, never.
They both know that. It's about drawing a line under it.
I've gone to his house with a lasagne and apologised,
but I left it as being civil then.
You're not a hundred percent an angel.
Oh, I've never claimed to one, babe.
But I literally am Satan, through and through. We know.
Youse two are looking cosy, anyway. It's hilarious.
You obviously ain't enough for him, though, babe.
That's why he's asking my sister out. Get back.
That's why he's asking...
You're meant to be in Dubai, though, aren't you?
You're meant to be Dubai. Why are you here?
ALL SHOUT Shut up. Shut up.
Why you getting involved? You've been chatting all fucking day, mate.
SHOUTING CONTINUES Rein it in! Rein it in.
Becks. Becks, stop.
Fucking mug.
Stop. Stop!
JORDAN: Shush, shush. Shush, right.
Oi, oi, oi, done. Done. Enough.
Enough. Fuck off.
No, no, I'm off. I've said what I've had to say.
Junaid, put him back in the cage, for fuck's sake.
Merry Christmas, everyone. Boring!
No, no, I'm done, anyway.
Piss off. Ta-da! Merry Christmas!
Right. Right! Listen! Listen. SHUSHING
To all you bastards, the ones that were shouting at each other,
we wanted today to be special.
It has been. We wanted it to be good,
and I want everyone to finish on a good note.
Love you. So, if you'd all stop fucking arguing!
Congratulations, Sophie and Jordan! Wait, wait, wait.
I wanted to finish today with a massive...You ain't having twins?
No. ..with a massive firework display.
It's outside. Go. Now.
I'm gonna cry. Fireworks make me cry.
MUSIC: 'Wonderful Christmastime' by Paul McCartney
ALL:Five, four, three, two, one!
# Simply having A wonderful Christmas-time
# Oh, oh, oh, oh
CHEERING Merry Christmas!
# Wonderful Christmas-time. #
CHEERING
ALL CHANTING:Baby Brook! Baby Brook! Baby Brook!
FREDDIE, ECHOING: 'Merry Christmas, you bastards.'
Subtitles by accessibility@itv.com
# The only, the only, the only The only, the only, the only
# The only, the only, the only
# The only way is up, baby
# For you and me now
# The only way is up, baby
# For you and me now
# Ooh-ooh-oh, ooh-ooh, oh, oh. #