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Skyhawk One-Zero-Four, Pensacola Tower.
Shit, we're busted, Dano.
Roger, Pensacola Tower. One-Zero-Four.
We've got a local resident complaint.
Touch-and-gos unauthorized at outlying fields
without emergency crew on-site.
You're gonna have to wrap it up, sir.
One-Zero-Four leaving the pattern.
We're meeting the ladies at 1800 anyway.
It's time for a cold one.
Your stick, Wilbur. Let's take her home.
Birds! One o'clock level!
Fuck!
Wilbur!
Punch out, punch out!
Wilbur!
Two, three...
Come on, buddy. That's it, come on!
That's it, come on, Wilbur! Breathe!
Fuck!
My brains are all over my hands!
No, no, no, it's bird guts!
- Birds. - Birds? Birds?
They took out our engine. Fucking birds.
- We punched out? - Yeah.
Like a couple of Roman candles!
I should've seen 'em, Dano.
Bird strike can happen to anybody.
No! The sun went down. I couldn't see shit!
You're tired, that's all!
There's gonna be an accident investigation!
They're gonna find out I couldn't see the birds!
What the fuck are you doing?
I'll tell 'em I was in command of the plane.
That I was in the front seat. They'll check my eyes.
Not yours.
And when they figure out we lied?
They won't!
We'll never pull this off.
So what am I gonna do?
Go there alone?
Remember, five years from now,
we will be the youngest pilots
ever selected for the space program.
And then we're gonna be the first astronauts to go back to the moon. We're a team.
We either do this together or we don't do it at all.
Damn straight.
We're gonna get our wings in a week, Wilbur.
I guaran-fuckin'-tee it.
Sweet!
Shit!
Beat! Beat!
Beat Army!
Your bride is a beauty, Lieutenant.
- Thank you, Admiral. - I got to pee.
-Hi!
Congratulations on your wings.
Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
- Same old stuff. - Do you know where you'll be stationed?
No. Well, I've got a temporary stay here in Pensacola, but...
Are you going to fly F-14s, F-18s?
Well...
Hey, he's practically married.
To who?
The Navy.
Darling! You look so pretty.
Well, thank you, handsome.
- Hey. - Hey.
Look at you!
Jeannie would've been so proud of you, Will.
Dano's the one, Mama Lynch. Without him, I'd be toast.
William.
I heard you executed a textbook ejection.
Saved Dan's ass.
It's all smoke and mirrors, Admiral.
Wilbur! Shut the fuck up.
Susan wants to see you. Come on.
Lieutenant J.G. Charlie Trumbo, Naval Aviator.
Oh, my!
You ladies Vogue models?
Stewie, Stewie! Stewie, Stewie!
- To Danny boy... - Thank you!
for crashing into those gooney birds
and making me numero uno!
It is hard to believe that 34 years have passed
since Admiral Lynch and I sat on this very bar guzzling for gold.
I guess time flies if you're lucky enough to be flying!
The wings on your chest are proof
that you have accomplished something great.
You have uncommon abilities.
Now, all of us are counting on you to keep the barbarians from the gates.
To accomplish that, you'll have the support of the greatest navy on Earth
armed with the most sophisticated aircraft and weapons systems ever developed.
What does this all add up to?
Exactly nothing
without the man standing beside you.
Respect him. Protect him with your life because without him, there is no us.
And if there's no us, there's no point to any of this.
Next stop, space.
May you know only fair winds,
following seas...
And the thrill of victory!
Thank you, Admiral!
Hey, come on, pal.
Let's crash the wedding next door.
All right.
Yeah! Babe!
Lieutenant Dave Marshall...
Who made the ultimate sacrifice
in service to his country.
- He was a good shit. - Amen.
All right, fellas. Rule number one,
if you've got a situation, don't forget to fly the fuckin' airplane.
All right, what's the gouge on the test pilot billets, Skipper?
Shuttle budget's been slashed.
Too many men on the pipeline.
They'll be looking for every reason to disqualify you guys.
Athlete's foot, gingivitis, excessive ugliness,
you name it.
You don't qualify for TPS this time around, you can kiss it good-bye forever.
Come here, mama.
Okay, get the money, get the money.
Guys...
What are you doing, sweet lips?
Boner!
Stewie, Stewie, Stewie!
Fly hard.
Jesus, Stewie. You look like shit.
Come on, let's do this thing!
Maybe he should sit this one out?
He's good to go, Skipper. Come on.
Canopy's jammed. Bring the one up.
Are you in 71 Zulu?
Okay, check the rudder trim!
The rudder trim?
Yeah, I griped it yesterday,
but I don't know if maintenance got to it, okay?
Mother fuck! Plane in the water!
General quarters, general quarters.
All hands to your battle stations.
Which one was Lieutenant Kelleher's bunk?
The bottom one.
Jesus!
Standard operating procedure, sir.
SOP my ass, have a little respect!
Wilbur!
You can't take this personally.
What if that was your bunk they were cutting up?
You can bet your ass I wouldn't just stand by and watch.
Like we did last night?
Stewie guzzled half a bottle of tequila.
Maybe we should have stopped him.
Yeah, and flushed Skipper's party
and our chances for TPS right down the shitter.
I shouldn't have let him fly.
He's a big boy. He's flown rougher than that.
We all have.
Anything in the maintenance gripe sheets to indicate
- a problem with the airplane? - No, sir.
Drugs?
Married?
Wife's pregnant. Everything was fine there.
What about booze?
We all blew off a little steam last night, Admiral.
You were the best flight lieutenant I ever had, Duke,
and you are a standout skipper but you lost
two men and two airplanes in as many months.
You know they're gonna be sending a suit out
from Washington to get some answers?
Yes, sir.
How's Dan doing?
- Still number one, sir. - Good.
Yeah, yeah.
My dad gave me directions to some path
above the Bay of Naps“.
- Where he met your mom? - Yeah.
She didn't speak any English.
I think the only Italian he knew was "pizza."
Forty-eight hours later, they were married and on a plane to Omaha.
That's how it happens, at least, that's what I hear.
When you know it, you know it.
- You just ironed those. - Yeah.
Line ain't straight.
You're the one ain't straight.
Come on, Dano, I got things in store for you.
Where are you gem"?
I can't tell you, it's classified.
- Classified? Come on! - Absolutely.
You don't have that clearance, Officer.
You mean he's not tall enough?
Okay, that's not necessary.
Yeah, that's not called for.
Hey, you can get in tight spaces. I can't.
Feast your eyes on that.
Where the hell have you been?
Oh, my God. What?
You know, we were passing this little jewelry store
and the cab just stopped.
- I can't believe it! - Thanks!
I'm so excited!
- That is amazing. Congratulations! - Are you a little scared?
Shitless.
Thank you.
Congratulations, Dan.
Wouldn't she have known if something was bothering him?
Since when? We're always the last to know.
Could Stewie have ejected?
I hate to interrupt this beautiful Neapolitan blizzard,
but we just got word from Pax River.
We're down to two TPS slots for the entire air wing.
The heat's on, boys.
I have this grim feeling the only shuttle
I'm ever gonna fly is the DC to Boston.
Because you had a bolter yesterday? Big deal.
Looks like we've met the competition.
I'm telling you what, Iron Man, my dick was so hard a cat couldn't scratch it.
I'd recommend keeping your little head on deck
and your big head in the cockpit, Boner.
I was locked on your six
and the next thing I know, you're on my nose closing fast.
I thought you were on Dana's ass trackin' for guns.
I was, after I nailed Stephensen.
I called "Exit, hard left," didn't I?
I didn't hear that.
Well, you gotta get your thumb out of your ass and listen up.
Hey, hey, hey, no reason to get testy.
Iron Man, we're all your homies now, right?
Good flight, Lynch.
But Lieutenant Kelleher allowed me to...
Spare me, Gorden. You fell asleep on watch.
No liberty in New York. Period.
My mother right now is really...
Hey, next time you land in the brig. You got it?
- Yeah. - Yeah?
Yes, sir, Mr. Blackwood.
Yeah.
Gents, this is John Cokely.
- He's a safety specialist out of DC. - Hi, guys.
He's gonna be sailing with us to New York
to see if there isn't any more that we can do
to stay on top of our game.
- Welcome. Matt Blackwood. - Oh, thank you.
- Charlie Trumbo. - Charlie.
- Will Stephensen. - Hi, Will.
Dan Lynch. Hi.
Lynch.
Are you related to...
Wilbur's daddy's an admiral, too.
Goddamn it, Boner.
My daddy's a pig farmer.
Look, any suggestions, observations you guys
might have, no matter how small, please feel free to...
I got a safety tip for you, John.
- Oh, what's that? - Stay away from the sliders.
They're like heaven goin' down,
but they tear your ass apart on the way out.
Honestly, I look forward to seeing Susan a little bit more, you know what I'm saying?
Kind of ridiculous, I mean, we haven't seen...
Mr. Stephensen. PAO wants to see you, sir.
- I'll wait. - Nah, this could take a while.
Meet me on the pier at 2100.
Roger! I got the camera.
Can you feel it in the air, Dano?
- What? - Love. It's everywhere.
Oh, God help you!
Turn it around.
Hey, the guys from 53 got a suite at the Waldorf
and passes to the opening of a new club.
Well, knock yourself out, Charlie.
- It's gonna be ladies on tap. - Yeah, from God knows where.
Make sure you double bag that thing.
I love the way you take care of me.
Hey, guys, come on.
Hey, brother.
Hello.
I thought you were meeting your wife?
Nah, something came up.
You lost?
I've always wanted to see the Empire State Building.
Follow me.
So that's it.
No, that's the Chrysler Building.
Unbelievable.
How'd you find out about this place?
The building superintendent belongs to our parish.
We used to come up here and watch fireworks.
So what came first, the guitar or the sax?
Piano. How'd you know I played sax?
Your wedding reception. Our winging party.
We ate all of your shrimp. Molested the bridesmaids.
So, you must come from a big musical family, huh?
Yeah. I grew up in a castle in Austria.
My governess was a nun.
You're funny.
Actually, it was split-level on Long Island.
It was just me.
My dad was a Lutheran minister and my mom,
the devoted wife, until she skipped town with his brother.
- So, do you have any kids? - No. You?
One day, I hope.
Well, what about flying for the Navy?
I wanted answers. Thought I'd find them up there.
Did you?
No.
Hey, what about a magic trick?
Sure.
I thought that's where we were going?
We were, but if you're in it you can't see it.
Susan? No, he's crying.
I don't want to say "Hi." He's crying,
I can't hear shit. Susan? Hello? No, I...
Hold on, I have to put in more quarters.
Susan? Susan!
Fuck!
Will?
Looks like you could use a drink.
It's, it's that thing. Everyone experiences it.
- No. - And the first... No,
it was when I was in a glider.
This craft that's just, I mean, just soaring
above everything else
and you've just got this, this freedom.
- The sky. - It didn't work like that for me.
You're lucky. I mean, me? My dad flew,
his dad flew. I'm meant to fly.
I'm meant to be good at this.
You have no idea
until you finally pull on that throttle and pull up.
That's from the lovely lady at the end of the bar.
- Hello. - We drink these, right?
We absolutely do.
- Cheers. To her. - To her.
It sounds stupid.
- Hi. - Hello.
Where did you park your airplane?
What makes you think we have one?
Only pilots or drag queens talk with hands like that.
- You are not drag queens, yes? - Yeah.
No. No, no, no. He means no.
Right.
Our airplanes are on the carrier.
In the harbor.
- Do you like to dance? - Like to dance?
- I... I... Yeah. - Yes.
This is your first time in New York, yes?
- It's his first time. - Yes.
Come.
Okay, come on.
- Okay. Okay, okay, let's go. - Go.
She's fuckin' sexy.
Two more. So, where you from?
- Brooklyn. - Oh, yeah?
- Hey, what's up, man. - Petty Officer Gorden.
Maybe I could show you around.
That's awesome.
Next ACM I'm gonna make sure Blackwood's my bogey
and hand him his ass on a platter.
Whose ass you gonna have on a platter, Will?
I wasted my whole night waiting for you.
I'm sorry.
- Damn it. - What the fuck?
Ship's Captain must be usin' his blow dryer again.
Boner, you take my shampoo?
Yeah. It's right here.
Here ya go, big guy.
Just squeeze and apply to scalp.
What the fuck! You sick piece of shit!
He's on your six, Boner, come on, move it!
Kids.
Underway.
Fuck. I'm sorry. Sorry.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize.
Forget it.
I came to get those shots for the PAO.
That's it?
You and Blackwood have fun last night?
What'd you do?
Nothing much.
Checked out the city, couple of beers.
Oh, I forgot about this one.
Oh, God, we were so trashed.
What's up with your night vision?
Nothing.
You said it'd all cleared up.
Not everyone's perfect, Dano.
If I don't make TPS now, I'm fucked.
No space flight. Ever.
I'll see a civilian doc when we get home.
Navy arriving.
Six thousand men afraid to fart.
So, did you find our jumper?
No. We did an expanded SAR pattern for two hours
and didn't see anything.
He's probably hiding in the fridge crying.
Probably. It wouldn't be the first time.
Lieutenant! Excuse me.
Dan, do you have a few minutes, please?
- See you later, Hals. - No problem.
So...
What do you think was the cause
of Lieutenant Stewart Kelleher's mishap?
You've read the accident report, you probably know better than I do.
Right. Right.
Okay, well...
What were the circumstances?
It was a daylight launch. The cat shot looked good,
but his plane hit the water about a hundred yards off the port bow.
Sank without a trace.
Well, what about Lieutenant Marshall's mishap last month?
What about it?
Word has it his wife was spreading her legs while he was gone.
I wouldn't know.
So, Lieutenant Kelleher had drunk too much the night before.
- I... - And if Lieutenant Marshall finds out
his wife's cheating on him...
You know, you've been the scheduling officer for the past four months.
Shouldn't you have taken them off the flight?
Lieutenant Lynch, report to the flag mess.
Sorry, John. My dad.
Of course.
Oh, by the way, heard you had a wild time
in the Big Apple the other night.
Not really.
Cokely asked me where we went last night.
You didn't say anything, did you?
No way.
Navy departing.
I need some advice.
So talk to me.
- You can't be objective. - Why not?
Because you thought I lit up the Empire State Building.
Hey, ladies, debriefing last night's secret mission?
I'm pullin' chocks. Catch ya later, Wilbur.
I saw the eye contact between you and lover boy just now.
You guys got laid in New York, didn't you?
I've gotta get some more shots for the newsletter.
Hey, I'm not lettin' you off that easy!
I need your help with the copy!
Keep it short and sweet. Stick to the facts.
Join the Navy and see the world, huh?
Pass you by.
Selecting zone five afterburner!
Show me what you got, Iron Man!
You can run, but you cannot hide!
Give 'em hell, Trumbo.
- Where the hell is he? - Right up your ass, big boy.
Trackin' for guns. I've got a lock.
- Yes! Goliath falls! - Fight's off!
No way, you're mine!
I repeat fight's off. I'm headed back to mother.
Holy shit. Now that's a first.
- What's a first? - Jesus.
You scared the bejesus out of me.
Sorry. Did Dan just nail Blackwood?
Yeah. What can I do for you, John?
Nothing, nothing. I was just hanging out.
You wouldn't know where I could get one of these?
Squadron issue only.
Oh, right.
Look, I'll talk to the supply chief.
Thanks.
Deal with it, I was right on your tail, Wilbur.
No way, Boner, I'd shaken you long before...
No, no, no!
What happened up there, big guy? Lose your balls?
Hey, hey, hey! I ever tell you guys about the time
me and my cousin had a date with a pig? Wilbur?
See, I got this cousin, Larry,
lived in Colorado and every time he'd visit, see...
Wait. Hey, we had this 600-pound sow named Debbie,
we used to take turns holdin' her while the other one
hid the sausage.
You're so full of shit, Boner.
Anyway, one time...
Actually, it was the last time cousin Larry ever visited,
see I was goin' to town on Debbie
and he was holdin' her in the corner
in the pen in the back of the barn
and all of a sudden his face just goes all long
and white as a ghost.
So I get up, turn around to see what he's lookin' at,
and there's my momma in her hair curlers
and her old pink bathrobe just staring at us.
I don't know who went down first, but we all did.
Yep, we all went down in the end.
Boner, you're stranger than fiction, man.
You should meet my cousin, Larry.
Come on, Wilbur, squeal like a pig for me.
You piece of shit, I'll fucking kill you.
- Goddamn it, Charlie, you piece of shit. - I'm gonna fart on you!
Hey, I'm sorry if I pushed you too hard out there today.
- Forget it. - No, I mean,
I could've rolled out...
Give it a rest, okay! I fucked up.
Taxpayers get nervous if they start hearing their warriors sniveling, all right?
What's up, Skip?
These just came in from Washington.
Holy shit.
We got it. We're in!
Congratulations, boys.
Sorry, man. Them's the breaks.
Oh, God, I can't believe it.
Good shit, dude.
Wilbur!
Don't tell me, they're sending a monkey in my place.
No. It's your father.
What happened?
He's at Norfolk General Hospital.
He had a heart attack.
All hands report to battle stations.
This is a drill. All hands report to battle stations.
more than 30 were injured. The ship is listing to port,
but not in danger of sinking at this time.
Fuckin' Habib in a dinghy!
The Cole had a crew of about 350.
It's based in Norfolk, Virginia...
We're stuffed.
President Clinton had this comment
at the White House, this afternoon.
If, as it now appears, this was an act of terrorism...
What's changed?
Everything.
What do you want, Danny?
It's like...
Me and Susan. You and Nancy.
Baseball and apple pie.
You fuckin' love each other.
It's that simple.
It's not that simple.
She's got the number one aviator in the fleet.
What the fuck does she want?
She's got a rock on her finger the size of a car.
It's complicated. It's my shit too. Mostly mine.
It's decorated like an old lady lives here.
Be nice.
Hey.
This is my wife, Tammi.
The pleasure is all mine.
- Can I take your coats? - Yes.
Hi. This is my wife, Tammi.
- Nice to meet you. - Your home is beautiful.
Thank you, but I didn't have anything to do with this.
This is Dan Lynch.
So, how do you like your quarters?
They're still being renovated.
We've been in a hotel for over a month now.
But a huge suite. So, I'm not complaining.
- But enough is enough! - Enough's enough.
Yeah.
So where exactly is Susan?
Listen, you just follow the sound of the blender
and you'll find Susan, okay?
You know what? I will take you to go meet her.
Oh, thank you.
You guys want margaritas?
- Beer. - Beer.
- Please. - Okay.
Bye.
How's Wilbur's dad?
Stable.
Where's your fiancée?
We decided to take a break.
- You okay? - Yeah.
I was hoping you'd come.
I'm gonna give this to Wilbur.
All right.
Happy birthday, Wilbur.
Thanks, man.
- Excuse me. - Beers.
Thank you.
Surprise.
Déja vu.
You are drunk!
- Come on, Wilbur. - Fuck.
Take it easy. What're you doing?
Jackass.
Hey!
How do you fit four queers on a bar stool?
You turn it over.
Help me up.
Happy birthday, old fucker.
- I'll see ya, all right. - You stink.
Please brush again.
Happy birthday, we'll see you soon.
- I hope you're driving? - Yes.
- You have fun? - I always have fun.
Later, buddy.
You bastard.
- Happy birthday, old man. - Thanks, man.
Don't kiss me, get the fuck out of here.
Hey, beautiful.
You wanna dance?
You're drunk!
Goodnight, baby.
You okay, Dano?
Yeah. Absolutely.
Wilbur, there's something...
Is everything okay with you and Nance?
Everything's fine. We're fine.
See you tomorrow.
So, you got a date with Iron Man?
You've got an appointment Monday morning.
Hey, I know you're worried about your dad.
He's gonna be fine.
What's going on with Dan and Nancy?
Are you gonna talk to me?
I'm turning in.
This is a tough place to find.
I still get lost.
Beer?
Listen.
I made a commitment to Tammi.
I gotta make it work.
How do you make a relationship work?
Look...
I didn't plan this!
You think I did?
Dudes in leather, drag queens. I've got nothing in common
- with any of that shit. - Neither do I!
Actually, I do.
I do know what it's like to fall for another man.
Cut that.
If we're careful, we can do this. We can.
To get to the top,
you have to make some sacrifices.
Leave some things behind.
Even if one of those things is yourself?
Fuck you, Lynch.
In the words of the great German poet, Rilke,
"God speaks to each of us
"Before we are Before he's formed us
"Then, in cloudy speech, But only then
"He speaks these words to each
"Driven by your senses, dare To the edge of longing
"Grow like a fire's shadow casting glare
"Don't leave me bare
"Let it all happen to you
"Beauty and dread
"Simply go
"No feeling is too much
"And only this way
"Can we stay in touch
"Near here is the land That they call Life
"You'll know when you arrive
"By how real it is
"Give me your hand"
Yes, sir, they were both there at the club.
Lieutenant Blackwood was
all over Lieutenant Lynch.
What exactly were they doing?
They were dancing, quite close.
They had their shirts off.
And...
They were touching. It was...
It was of a sexual nature, sir.
Was anyone else there besides Blackwood?
Yes, sir. Lieutenant Trumbo was also there.
- Lieutenant Trumbo? - Yes, sir.
Okay.
Listen.
If you can think of anything else, I wanna know.
- Yes, sir. - Good.
0.
No.
C.
You're acuity has improved,
but your low light response time
has deteriorated considerably, Bill.
I recommend you take a position that
doesn't require you to be on the road at night.
I'll talk to my boss.
Oh, sweetheart, thank you so much.
Of course.
- Looks like it's gonna be a fun day. - Oh, yeah.
Yo, come here. All right, turn and face, let's go.
What you got? Huh?
See, you gotta be more ready.
More ready for the heat.
See my butt, it's in your face.
What are you gonna do about that?
You're goin' nowhere.
Careful!
What do you mean, be careful? Look no hands, Mom.
Daddy!
- Hey, come here. - Hi.
Hey there, buddy.
- Dano got me a basketball. - Oh yeah? Cool.
- We need to get a hoop. - I guess so.
- How'd it go? - Good as new.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- You ready, Susan? - Yeah, where'd you go?
Just an annual.
You ready? Okay.
Come here.
Can we finish The Space Shuttle today?
Sure. After you take a nap, okay?
But right now I just want you to dream
of rockets and spaceships
and all the beautiful stars, okay?
Sleep tight, mister.
Another TPS slot opened up.
The same class you and Will are headed for.
Detailer penciled me in.
What do you think?
- Go for it. - You think so?
Absolutely.
Man, we're gonna set that town on fire!
What?
I'm staying here.
I'm going back on tour with 53.
What?
I won't see you anymore.
Look, we had a drunken night in New York,
so let's just chalk it up to experience, what do you say?
I've got your number, remember?
It's the same as mine.
What about your wife?
You said you wanted a family...
Yeah, I do!
But that's not what's happening here! Not now.
I've made up my mind.
Shit, wait, wait, wait.
- What? - I've gotta move my gear back to the BOQ.
The Q?
Tammi and I split.
No more. I'm on duty.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
I promised Attie that I would spend some time with him this evening.
Right, and I've gotta fly the avionics hop with Will and Boner.
Well, then maybe we could grab a late dinner?
I mean, you can crash at my place after the hop.
The key's above the door.
There's beer in the fridge.
All right.
I've been working on something, too.
Maybe you wanna give it a listen or...
Sure.
- Above the door? - Yeah.
John, your assumptions are based on the accusations
of an insubordinate sailor who...
Who knows more about your men than you do!
I don't think you realize how serious this is.
Okay, the CNO'S son is the target of
a gay cell which is destroying the cohesion of your squadron!
- A gay cell? - Yeah.
Blackwood. Trumbo. And that's just for starters.
You are a safety specialist, John.
A fucking civilian. Okay?
You don't have the authority to do shit.
Special Agent John Cokely, NCIS.
That enough authority for you?
How's a buff guy like you still single?
Buff? Why, thank you!
Guess I just haven't been lucky enough to meet the right person yet.
But you like girls, don't you?
Girls?
I liked girls when I was a kid.
I like women now.
Get your clothes on, Trumbo.
I would, but you're standin' in front of my skivvies.
Yeah, well,
Petty Officer Gorden told us
he saw you in a gay club in New York.
- Really? - Really.
You have anything to say about that?
Well, I do remember a lot of men
dancin' with men.
Were they homosexuals?
What exactly was Dan doing there?
- Was he there? - All right.
Can you explain this?
Well, that's embarrassing.
That's understandable.
- When you got... - No, 'cause I can promise you,
that this makes my johnson look half its actual size.
Wouldn't you agree?
Dan and his fiancée, they're still doing the dirty deed?
"Dirty"?
Are they fucking?
Look, let's just cut to the chase,
you wanna know what makes his pecker hard.
Well, I don't know and I don't give a rat's ass.
As long as he can cut the Grey Poupon when the shit hits the fan,
he can hump a tree if it revs his engine.
I'd love to sit here and chat, but I got a date,
with a very sexy airplane.
We'll be talking soon though.
- Afternoon, Skipper. Sir? - Iron Man.
Why didn't you tell me you were having problems
in your marriage?
Where'd you hear that, sir?
You... You seeing another girl on the side?
No, sir.
Look, I'm filling out fitness reports.
I need to include something about your wife
or your girlfriend in order to justify your TPS slot.
- Sir? - Cokely is crawlin' up my ass.
Either you're part of the solution, or you're part of the problem.
Understand?
Sorry, Boner.
Where's Iron Man?
He went lookin' for you.
Everything cool?
Let's roll.
Okay, try and look ahead of you, like you're looking
at a player who's gonna try and stop you, okay?
It's official. Everything's over cooked.
I don't know what to say, sweetie,
I mean, he should've been home an hour ago.
Watch out.
Be sure you give this to Tammi.
I will.
Matt's dead.
- Tears won't bring him back. - Will, please.
We'd better get a move on.
I loved Matt.
Of course you did, honey.
That night in New York,
I didn't forget you were waiting.
I blew you off.
I was watching Attie...
He came by and we kissed,
- and everything just... - No.
We've gotta get home.
Dan! I need you to come with me.
You can circle the wagons, but you're always gonna be surrounded.
Well, well. What's goin' on here?
- We were just... - Gettin' acquainted?
Did he tell you about his bailout over Pensacola Bay?
No, sir, I didn't see anything.
That's 'cause it's been expunged.
Bird strike. Five years ago.
He had command of the aircraft,
took a direct hit after an unauthorized
touch-and-go from an abandoned airfield.
He's new at this.
There was an accident report, a thorough investigation.
The case was closed.
Then, why do you think you're here, Don?
- Dan. - Whatever.
Any ideas?
Not really.
Last week's mishap,
why do you think Blackwood lost control of his plane?
What makes you think he did?
- You're stalking me? - In my business it's called surveillance.
What were you doin' here?
- Nothing. - There you go lyin' again.
I'm not lying.
You and Blackwood were seen in a gay club in New York.
You fuckin' homo!
If you guys thought less about your dicks...
- Secure him! - Step back.
- Special Agent John Cokely. - Where's my husband?
Maybe you should take a seat.
- My kitchen? - Yes.
What do you think they might be doing there?
Talking?
Your husband and Lieutenant Lynch seem to be unusually close.
I think I can say with absolute certainty
that my husband is...
You've got to be kidding me.
I told you, I didn't meet up with them.
Do you know where they went?
Sightseeing?
"Sightseeing"? Is that code?
Pink triangles, rainbow flags?
How much more of this bullshit do I have to tolerate?
Can you identify the men in this photo, Will?
I'm pretty sure that's me, Stewie, Dan,
and Boner in Italy last year.
That is you in the middle?
We'd been to the Sistine Chapel.
We were recreating one of the murals we saw
painted on the ceiling.
And who instigated the gay orgy afterwards?
We posed for a picture. That's it.
You do realize, Will, you are subject
to certain expectations regarding your conduct?
Gimme a break. We were on leave.
There was nobody around for miles.
Pensacola bird strike. Five years ago.
Something's fishy 'bout the post mishap medical.
What are you hidin', Lieutenant?
Says that you waited in the woods six hours before the SAR team located you...
On the beach! We were on...
That you both returned with hemorrhoids.
Scared your daddy's gonna find out that you like gettin' plugged by men?
You ever punch out of a plane at 400 miles an hour?
Do your homework. Jet jocks get hemorrhoids.
I'm not gay.
We'll see about that.
Your buddy was seen engaged in a homosexual activity
with Blackwood during your last port call in New York.
He just confessed, Will.
Looks like they had a secret life that didn't include you.
Turn around.
If you're not back here by 0700
Monday morning, I'll have you locked up
where nobody will ever find you.
Where you goin'?
Gotta talk to my dad.
What the hell are you doing?
You sure you wanna throw that away?
You know, you and Iron Man weren't the only Navy guys
- in that club. - What were you doing there?
Come on, Dano, the music's better and the people are more fun.
Did Cokely question you?
I did not bilge you, buddy.
He sure was a handsome dog.
Keep it if you want.
Did you talk to Wilbur?
He's all right, he'll come around.
He's just freaked out about the accident.
What really happened up there?
Wilbur called a rendezvous.
Matt was on top,
Wilbur was in the slot.
I was joining from below.
And...
My whole life I've been waitin' for somebody.
Can't imagine how much you must hurt right now.
Fly safe.
Well, I thought,
a candlelight ceremony in the National Cathedral.
- You're kidding, you can't be serious! - Don't you think it's fitting?
I told you...
She's an actress in New York. She is blonde, gorgeous,
- darling, perfect manners. - They must be a perfect couple.
They are made in heaven.
Oh, Romi, I was just, I was wondering...
See if you could... I can't quite... I don't know why.
Can we talk?
I've already been briefed.
- Daniel. - Admiral.
I thought you were at home taking it easy?
Had enough of that, son. Full speed ahead. No other way.
- Yes, sir. - I understand you're getting
some heat from the spooks downstairs.
Nothing I can't handle, sir.
Well, I'm gonna check into it.
Don't let the bastards get you down.
Yes, sir. Thank you, Admiral.
Gorden says you were all over Blackwood in that night club.
He saw us dancing. Period.
And you don't remember anybody else in that club,
other than Blackwood?
You sure you don't wanna make this easy for yourself?
So you break up with your lady after eight years?
That must've been difficult.
She's a lot of things I thought I wanted.
Things my family wanted me to want.
Life would be a lot simpler if you'd just accept who you are.
Hell, it took me years, but I found my peace. Eventually.
So you're gay?
No. I'm black.
Hey, hey.
Go back to sleep.
We don't brief for another hour.
Agent Cokely called.
He said you implicated Will. He wants names or...
- He's a liar. - I don't know what to believe.
Have you spoken to Nance?
Just call her. Dan, I'm sure she'd be happy to come down here.
They'll see you're with a woman and...
No!
It's okay to have sex with a man
as long as it's an isolated incident.
It's true. It's in the rags.
Don't you see that's what this was?
- An isolated incident. - Susan!
I was in love with Matt.
Dan. I'm so sorry. I didn't...
I'm so sorry!
Take a seat, Daniel.
If I may, Admiral, I'd like to start by...
That'll be all, Special Agent.
Sir, I'm the only person that knows...
I have copies of everything right here.
You're dismissed.
Sit down, son.
Your lack of judgment has put me in an impossible position.
- Yes, sir. - Not to mention the Navy.
Yes, sir, I know.
That punk out there believes all three mishaps can be
attributed to some kind of perverse cult.
- Sir, you should... - Best not to talk right now, son.
If the press got hold of this it would tarnish the Navy irreparably.
So...
I'm gonna take care of this thing so we can get on to more
pressing matters and pretend this never happened.
Given that you had no intention of
setting up house
and that you do not identify yourself in that way
or with that group, et cetera.
Sign this affidavit indicating it was an isolated incident.
Blackwood coerced you into the damn place,
forced you into lewd behavior...
- That's not true! - The facts are unimportant!
This is damage control.
I went there willingly.
We danced together.
You're a disgrace to the uniform.
That was it, son?
No, sir.
We are warriors paid to defend this country
not spill our guts and frolic in the daisies!
What the hell are you doing?
Daniel, please, just sign it.
No, sir.
Personnel will have my letter of resignation.
- Daniel! - Sorry, Dad.
Mommy?
Go back to bed, sweetheart, I'll be up soon, okay?
For months I've had the same dream, night after night.
A Casualty Assistance officer tells me that
- your plane was lost at sea... - I'm a good pilot.
Nothing's gonna happen to me.
The Honor Guard just buried your dad next to your mom.
Come on, Will, didn't it destroy you?
- I have my own way of... - Bullshit!
Bullshit.
I'm so sick of this sensitive man crap.
Where would this country be if we fell apart every time someone died?
It's part of my job to keep it together.
We're about to sell your parents' home...
And you... Will!
Dan.
I wanted to catch you before you left town.
This is for Attie. His birthday.
Would you come in for a while?
Susan, we gotta get this stuff out of here,
there's an open house in the morning.
- Susan, thanks anyway. - No, no, that's okay.
Susan, you're going nowhere. We gotta pack this stuff...
Dan, you two can talk for a while.
How can we talk when he won't even look at me?
- Yes, he can. Will? - Come on, buddy.
Last chance.
Say it.
I know you want to.
Come on.
Say it.
- Say it, you fucking coward! - Faggot!
No, he didn't mean it. Will...
Would you just talk to him? Please, Dan.
There's nothing left to talk about!
Fuck you! I'm the guy who's always been there!
I'm your best buddy!
Then where the hell have you been?
I've been silenced and harassed and humiliated.
My career's in the shit-can and I don't have a single person to turn to.
What the fuck are you moaning about?
What the fuck have you lost?
You!
I lost you.
Where do I fit in now?
It was my fault.
It was just like the birds.
I should've seen him.
Maybe he should've seen you.
I'm done flying, Dano.
What about all our plans?
Our kids?
I tried so hard to stop it.
I'll threaten to go to the media if they don't reinstate you.
There's gotta be some way to fix this.
No. It's over.
I'm not hiding anymore. No more lies.
What are we gonna do?
I don't know.
What do you want me to say?
Just tell me what to say.
Say anything. Ask me anything.
Just don't stop talking to me.