1 00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:48,173 I thought a long, long time about what to say today. 2 00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:52,177 How to pay tribute, but also tell the truth. 3 00:00:54,638 --> 00:01:00,269 It truly hurts me to think that my actions have caused anyone emotional distress. 4 00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:04,147 When I think of the pain that I may have caused, I-I just... 5 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:08,986 Well, I feel awful. Every day, I wish that I could go back in time. 6 00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:15,742 I was used to a certain culture of partying and hookups, 7 00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:19,621 and many of us never questioned it, but it is time to question it. 8 00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:22,374 And I know that I need to be the one to set an example. 9 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,585 I'm... I'm trying every day to be a better man, 10 00:01:25,669 --> 00:01:28,880 to be the man that my parents raised me to be. 11 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:32,301 And to be a positive influence at Liberty High. 12 00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:36,847 It is my sincerest hope that you will allow me to do so. 13 00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:39,349 Thank you, sir. 14 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:43,603 -Does the county accept the allocution? -We do, Your Honor. 15 00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:44,688 Prior to sentencing, 16 00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:47,774 the victim would like to exercise her right to make her own statement. 17 00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:49,192 Proceed. 18 00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:50,986 I have to admit, 19 00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:54,197 when I was asked to speak today, I didn't want to. 20 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:57,075 To stand up in front of all these people. 21 00:01:58,410 --> 00:01:59,953 But it's what Hannah deserves. 22 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:05,042 Your Honor, thank you for this opportunity to address the court. 23 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:08,128 If it's all right, for the first part of my statement, 24 00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,297 I'd like to address the defendant directly. 25 00:02:10,756 --> 00:02:12,341 - Go right ahead. - Why not? 26 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:17,346 The first weekend in September, my parents were out of town 27 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,973 and my little brothers were at their grandparents'. 28 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:23,226 I wanted to host a party 29 00:02:24,436 --> 00:02:27,356 like I thought a popular cheerleader should. 30 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,361 My boyfriend was there. 31 00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:34,946 Your friend Justin. 32 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:39,409 We had been drinking. 33 00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:45,248 We decided to go up to my room. 34 00:02:50,128 --> 00:02:53,131 I remember making out with him. 35 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:58,929 And then I... 36 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:06,395 And then I started to fall asleep or... or pass out. 37 00:03:12,776 --> 00:03:16,279 I just... I remember thinking 38 00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:19,282 that I just needed to close my eyes for a few minutes. 39 00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:26,206 Then he... 40 00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,961 Then he walked out of the room. 41 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:35,716 And then I remember waking up to you pulling off my underwear. 42 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:43,724 I remember feeling you push yourself inside of me. 43 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:48,395 I may not remember all of the details, 44 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:51,314 but I will never forget the sheer terror 45 00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:54,109 of feeling your weight on top of me, 46 00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:58,572 of not being able to breathe. 47 00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:08,832 When I opened my eyes, I was alone in the hot tub with him, 48 00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:10,500 and there was... 49 00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:15,964 The way he looked at me, there was something in his eyes. 50 00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:18,508 And I was afraid. 51 00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:22,929 I wanted to slow down, but he told me not to be a tease. 52 00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:25,724 And he pushed me down on the couch 53 00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:28,894 and said he was glad I had waited for him. 54 00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:32,731 And then he pulled off my jeans and then my underwear. 55 00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,984 And he said that if I showed my body better, 56 00:04:36,401 --> 00:04:38,153 people wouldn't think I was a lesbian. 57 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:40,405 He used a different word. 58 00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:43,992 And then he grabbed me on the inside of my thigh. 59 00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:47,954 At that moment, we were left alone, and he picked me up. 60 00:04:48,038 --> 00:04:52,876 He just picked me up and carried me behind the fence. 61 00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:56,755 And he lay down on top of me and started to take my pants off. 62 00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:58,715 I fought and I fought, 63 00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:02,469 but he was 18 and I was 12. 64 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,722 I found out later this guard had a reputation. 65 00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:07,974 When he got up from my bed and left, 66 00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:11,812 my roommate rolled over and told me it happened to most of the girls. 67 00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,105 I was a second-year associate. 68 00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:17,734 He invited me to a strategy meeting in his hotel room. 69 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,862 He answered the door in his bathrobe. 70 00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,865 I spent the evening insisting we work on the case. 71 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:26,827 At the end of that year, I was let go. 72 00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:31,832 I had been babysitting for this family for, I guess, two years. 73 00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:33,375 He was my youth pastor. 74 00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:34,709 My second cousin. 75 00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:38,255 Your Honor, when we leave this courtroom, 76 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,091 Bryce Walker gets to leave 77 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:44,636 convinced that he chose the wrong girl to have sex with. 78 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,682 I get to leave constantly looking over my shoulder 79 00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:51,226 for monsters dressed up as the popular kid, 80 00:05:52,394 --> 00:05:55,897 constantly on edge and assuming the worst in every boy. 81 00:05:56,314 --> 00:06:00,193 The sentence you decide today can tell Bryce Walker what he did was wrong. 82 00:06:00,402 --> 00:06:05,991 It can say that to every boy, every man who behaves like he does. 83 00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:11,663 And it can say to victims like me that our story matters. 84 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:15,500 Thank you. 85 00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:25,176 Prosecution has put forth a sentencing recommendation. 86 00:06:25,844 --> 00:06:27,971 Does the defense have anything to contribute? 87 00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:32,434 Your Honor, this is a terribly unfortunate event. 88 00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,687 And two young lives have been changed forever. 89 00:06:36,521 --> 00:06:39,316 Bryce has lost all his scholarship offers. 90 00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:41,401 The school district has cancelled 91 00:06:41,484 --> 00:06:43,612 what might well have been a championship season. 92 00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,906 There is regret on all sides. 93 00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:50,577 We urge the court to let these two young people start rebuilding 94 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,078 and return to their lives. 95 00:06:53,288 --> 00:06:54,831 This is a tragedy all around. 96 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:58,668 As a judge, it's my role to look at both sides. 97 00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:02,839 And California law requires every judge to consider rehabilitation 98 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:05,133 and probation for first-time offenders. 99 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,427 I'd like to see these two young people 100 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:10,430 look hard at their lives and their choices. 101 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:13,016 But I don't want to do any further damage. 102 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:14,643 Mr. Walker... 103 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:20,190 I expect you to walk the straight and narrow. 104 00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:23,777 I'm sentencing you to three months probation. So ordered. 105 00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:26,488 Your Honor, three months probation? 106 00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:28,490 That's all. 107 00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:32,077 I'm angry. I'm sad. 108 00:07:32,744 --> 00:07:35,747 And I still have no idea how what happened happened. 109 00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:40,293 Talk to me about the sex doll that was found at Ms. Davis' home. 110 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,256 Or the dead rat that was inside Mr. Dempsey's locker. 111 00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:48,093 The vandalism to Mr. Padilla's car. 112 00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,095 This is bullshit. 113 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,222 What about the shooting target you sent my son? 114 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:54,557 I didn't do any of that. 115 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:57,394 We have several kids who say he intimidated witnesses, 116 00:07:57,894 --> 00:07:59,604 engaged in felony vandalism. 117 00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,607 Everyone's saying all kinds of shit, but it's not true. 118 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:04,025 Where's the gun? 119 00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:07,612 I never touched a gun in my life. 120 00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:12,826 Your Honor, Bryce Walker was released on bail within hours of his arrest, 121 00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:16,746 and Justin has been stranded in juvenile detention for almost a month. 122 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,790 I'm aware of the timeline. 123 00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:21,084 The related case is complete as of today. 124 00:08:21,376 --> 00:08:23,878 Justin's plea is in, the paperwork is done. 125 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:28,299 Understood, Counselor, but as a minor, he has to be released into custody. 126 00:08:28,383 --> 00:08:31,136 We have been searching for Amber Foley for weeks, Your Honor. 127 00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:34,639 -She's nowhere to be found. -Keep looking. Until then, he's remanded. 128 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:36,641 Bailiff? 129 00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,648 Hang on, Justin. We're working on it. 130 00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:45,066 I know. Thank you. 131 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,028 We're still learning all the ways we've been changed. 132 00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:50,488 All the things we've lost. 133 00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,075 I'm so fucking sorry. 134 00:08:57,495 --> 00:08:58,580 It's insane. 135 00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:06,212 But somehow I still feel stronger. 136 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:14,846 Wait, where's Justin? 137 00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:19,184 They'll only release him to a guardian, and the judge won't move on it. 138 00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:22,645 We've filed emergency papers, but it's a 24-hour minimum. 139 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,939 I'll take the petition to Purdy. He owes us. 140 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:27,108 Do you wanna start on the order for the school? 141 00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:28,276 Yeah. 142 00:09:28,651 --> 00:09:32,572 We're asking for a court order to force the school to protect you. 143 00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:34,491 To keep him away from you. 144 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,034 Thank you. 145 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:40,413 Mom, is your firm... I mean, are they cool with this? 146 00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:44,918 I've left the firm... to work with Dennis on cases like this. 147 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:46,336 Oh, that's... 148 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:49,422 That's cool. 149 00:09:55,136 --> 00:09:58,223 We're just starting to figure out how to go on with our lives. 150 00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,944 Coach said we could leave our lockers till the end of the year. 151 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:13,696 I'm transferring. To Hillcrest. 152 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,658 Hillcrest? You got the grades for that? 153 00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:18,409 Not exactly. 154 00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:21,663 Well, private schools need fields, too, I guess. 155 00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:27,460 Yeah. And uniforms and all that shit. 156 00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:30,588 Speaking of which... 157 00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:36,094 not all of my credits transferred, so I'll be going in as a junior. 158 00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:38,555 Which means I'll see you on the field this fall. 159 00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:42,976 -They're letting you play football? -That's right. See you at the dance. 160 00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:45,186 Wait. 161 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:50,024 So, you and Chloe? 162 00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:52,152 Yeah. Loyalty. 163 00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,113 It's a thing, huh? 164 00:10:57,740 --> 00:10:59,159 Take care of yourself, Zachy. 165 00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:05,039 I say "go on" and not "move on" because in some ways... 166 00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:08,001 we'll never completely move on from what happened. 167 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,254 Your meeting with the district psychologist went well 168 00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,132 and the reports from your diversion program are excellent. 169 00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:15,383 It was a good program. 170 00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:16,885 Tell me why. 171 00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,847 Um, well, at first, it was very difficult. 172 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:23,099 You know, the long hikes and the camping. 173 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:24,976 But after a few days, 174 00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:29,105 with everything else stripped away, you're just left to your thoughts and... 175 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:31,482 you learn things. 176 00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:33,234 And what did you learn? 177 00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:35,987 That I can choose how I respond to things. 178 00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:39,532 That even if I am feeling angry, or lonely, or whatever, 179 00:11:39,616 --> 00:11:41,409 that I'm in control of my own actions. 180 00:11:42,076 --> 00:11:46,831 I can't control what other people do, but I can control my response. 181 00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:50,793 Do you think you're ready to come back? Do you think things will be different? 182 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:52,795 Yeah, I think so. 183 00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:55,048 I'm ready. 184 00:11:58,217 --> 00:12:02,639 Principal Bolan is concerned that we keep a very close eye on you. 185 00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:04,766 I understand. 186 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:09,270 And your return won't be easy. 187 00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,064 No, I know. 188 00:12:17,612 --> 00:12:18,446 Hey. 189 00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:22,367 Hi! Hi. 190 00:12:22,617 --> 00:12:23,451 Hey. 191 00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:25,328 -You're back! -I am. 192 00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:27,747 -Wow. You look good. -Thanks. 193 00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:30,416 Yeah, apparently, natural sunlight and physical exercise 194 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,168 are, like, good for us or something. 195 00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:33,753 - Something. - Something. 196 00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:36,506 The good news is that I'm back in time for the Spring Fling. 197 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:40,093 And I was determined to make it back in time to take you. 198 00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,012 -Oh. -I mean, or we could just blow it off. 199 00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,431 -We could do something else. -Yeah, no, I mean... 200 00:12:46,307 --> 00:12:49,894 I'm-I'm going to the dance, uh, with Eric. 201 00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:52,397 Okay. Oh. 202 00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:54,148 -Cool. -Yeah. 203 00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:57,068 We're kinda dating. Just for, like, a few weeks now. 204 00:12:57,443 --> 00:13:00,822 Yeah, cool. You know, he's... Eric's a good guy, so... 205 00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:02,615 Yeah, that's cool. 206 00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:03,866 Yeah. 207 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,994 -Shoot. I gotta run. -Yeah, me, too. 208 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,037 I'm really glad you're back. 209 00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:09,330 Thanks. 210 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:10,665 Glad to be back. 211 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,126 -Bye. -Bye. 212 00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:16,587 What's up, man? 213 00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,843 And I don't say "get back to normal" 214 00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:24,595 because life will never be normal again. 215 00:13:27,181 --> 00:13:31,644 Before we start, I am distrustful of religion. 216 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,773 Okay. The service can be whatever you want it to be. 217 00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:39,819 It's just... my mother always told us we should abide, 218 00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:42,947 and have faith, accept what's coming to us. 219 00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:45,950 And I think that teaches people to be passive. 220 00:13:46,534 --> 00:13:49,704 I think abiding and acceptance is bullshit. 221 00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:53,124 -Excuse my language. -I don't disagree. 222 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,002 So tell me, 223 00:13:56,377 --> 00:14:00,506 w-why choose a church for Hannah's service? 224 00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:04,052 We, uh... we both come from religious families, 225 00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:08,306 and it's something we drifted from a bit, and thought maybe it was... 226 00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:12,727 something Hannah perhaps should have had in her life. 227 00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:13,728 We were ashamed. 228 00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:19,817 We were ashamed to have a funeral. 229 00:14:21,652 --> 00:14:22,653 Or a service. 230 00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:26,074 But then, after everything that happened, 231 00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:28,618 if there is a God, I want Him to see that... 232 00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:34,749 my little girl deserves His care. 233 00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:37,919 He will. 234 00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:40,213 He'll see that. 235 00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,257 A few of the other places we called, 236 00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:49,222 given the circumstances of Hannah's death... 237 00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:53,351 Let me assure you... 238 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,020 there's no judgment from me. 239 00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,774 Not regarding Hannah's decision 240 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:02,735 or the circumstances that led her there. 241 00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:08,074 And I hope one day you'll release yourselves 242 00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:12,662 from any shame you might still be feeling as well. 243 00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:28,469 Life is divided into "Hannah" and "after Hannah." 244 00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:31,180 I don't have anything to compare it to. 245 00:15:31,806 --> 00:15:33,141 I've lived here all my life. 246 00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:37,645 It's like asking Han Solo, "How is space?" 247 00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:41,566 Wow. You're an actual nerd, aren't you? 248 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,610 I admire that. There's courage in being a nerd. 249 00:15:51,075 --> 00:15:52,994 Memories are sometimes a relief. 250 00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:03,671 And sometimes they're torture. 251 00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:04,964 I was right. 252 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,508 You're the most courageous nerd I ever knew. 253 00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:12,263 They asked me to speak. 254 00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,057 At your service. 255 00:16:16,559 --> 00:16:17,477 Are you gonna do it? 256 00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:21,189 I don't know what to say. 257 00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:27,361 Or if I can trust myself not to be angry. 258 00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:29,906 So, be angry. 259 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:39,373 Or if I can say what I really need to say. 260 00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:44,504 I think you can. 261 00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:49,091 But we hold on to the memories... 262 00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:55,681 ...because they're what we have left. 263 00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:04,565 You're doing great this time. 264 00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:12,782 You can look now. No more comma. 265 00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:21,999 Thank you. 266 00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:23,626 And we have an urge to remember, 267 00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:26,212 to commemorate another time, 268 00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:29,507 to hold on to this as long as we can. 269 00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:33,177 The thing I'm most afraid of... 270 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:37,848 is forgetting you. 271 00:17:40,351 --> 00:17:41,185 Then don't. 272 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:46,983 The thing I'm second most afraid of is I'll never be able to let you go. 273 00:17:50,361 --> 00:17:51,904 Do you remember the winter dance? 274 00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,407 Not the slow dance, but... 275 00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:58,995 that song where we jumped around like idiots and looked like fools. 276 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:01,497 Like absolute dorks. 277 00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:04,709 Yeah. 278 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:07,461 Why? 279 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:09,547 No reason. 280 00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,675 I just wanted you to think of that right now. 281 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:31,027 But today... 282 00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,322 we begin to let go. 283 00:18:59,597 --> 00:19:02,642 We're here to say goodbye to Hannah. 284 00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:08,606 One act does not define a life. 285 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:12,777 We celebrate the richness of her life, 286 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:16,989 even as the tragic circumstances of her death cannot be forgotten. 287 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:23,663 It does my heart good to see so many of Hannah's friends here today. 288 00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:27,041 Hannah had the biggest heart, 289 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:30,252 which she so generously shared with all of us. 290 00:19:31,754 --> 00:19:34,674 So, please, be kind to each other. 291 00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:41,180 She dreamed of going to New York to become a writer. 292 00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:48,145 I'm not sure when that dream began to feel impossible to her. 293 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:53,442 Hannah was my dream. 294 00:19:56,278 --> 00:20:01,575 And now I get to dream for Hannah as well as for myself. 295 00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:03,285 And so do all of you. 296 00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:05,913 So, please, 297 00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:09,583 dream your dreams. 298 00:20:10,084 --> 00:20:11,711 And dream them for Hannah, 299 00:20:12,294 --> 00:20:14,922 and don't let anyone take them away from you. 300 00:20:16,841 --> 00:20:18,008 Don't ever let them go. 301 00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:26,392 Hannah Baker came into my life at the end of one summer 302 00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:29,520 like a star that fell to Earth. 303 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,773 Like nothing I had seen, 304 00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:35,443 like no one I had ever met. 305 00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:40,364 She was funny, and smart, 306 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:45,161 and moody, and... and maddening, 307 00:20:45,995 --> 00:20:47,705 and beautiful. 308 00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:07,391 And... 309 00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:12,563 I loved her. 310 00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,484 I loved her so much. 311 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:22,740 And I ask her every day why she did what she did. 312 00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,243 But I get no answers. 313 00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:32,041 She took those with her when she went. 314 00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,503 Leaving me, all of us, 315 00:21:36,670 --> 00:21:41,383 angry, empty, confused. 316 00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:47,056 And I know that hurt won't ever go away. 317 00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:51,644 But there will come a day when I don't feel it every minute. 318 00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:56,357 And the anger won't be so hot, and the other feelings will fade, 319 00:21:59,610 --> 00:22:01,195 and I'll be left with only love. 320 00:22:06,617 --> 00:22:08,244 A good friend once said to me, 321 00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:11,747 "I can love you and still let you go." 322 00:22:17,044 --> 00:22:18,087 So, Hannah, 323 00:22:21,715 --> 00:22:22,550 I love you, 324 00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:26,220 and I let you go. 325 00:22:30,140 --> 00:22:31,058 And I miss you. 326 00:22:35,271 --> 00:22:36,939 And I hope that wherever you go next, 327 00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:39,775 you feel peace, 328 00:22:41,652 --> 00:22:42,778 you feel safe 329 00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:46,448 in a way that you never did here. 330 00:22:56,292 --> 00:22:57,418 Wherever you go next, 331 00:22:59,795 --> 00:23:01,255 I hope you know that I love you. 332 00:24:01,398 --> 00:24:02,358 Everything okay? 333 00:24:05,110 --> 00:24:07,071 Yeah. No, I just, um... 334 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,783 -I was just taking a minute. -Of course. 335 00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:12,785 I'll leave you to it. 336 00:24:14,203 --> 00:24:15,204 Can I ask you... 337 00:24:20,501 --> 00:24:22,419 do you believe in the immortal soul? 338 00:24:23,962 --> 00:24:24,797 I do. 339 00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:27,591 And do you think Hannah is going to hell 340 00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:30,260 because she killed herself? 341 00:24:35,641 --> 00:24:36,475 I don't. 342 00:24:37,184 --> 00:24:40,854 I think the God I believe in, a just God, 343 00:24:41,772 --> 00:24:44,400 would have mercy on a soul like hers. 344 00:24:46,735 --> 00:24:50,364 And if God forgives her, we should. 345 00:24:51,532 --> 00:24:55,536 I believe we should follow His example, sure, but... 346 00:24:57,287 --> 00:24:58,539 it's not always easy. 347 00:25:01,834 --> 00:25:02,793 And do you think... 348 00:25:05,671 --> 00:25:07,339 Does God forgive us? 349 00:25:09,425 --> 00:25:10,676 The people who let her down? 350 00:25:12,219 --> 00:25:13,137 I think He does. 351 00:25:17,057 --> 00:25:22,104 Clay, you don't have to believe in the immortal soul 352 00:25:22,813 --> 00:25:25,733 to believe that people live on with us. 353 00:25:26,608 --> 00:25:27,860 Wait, what do you mean? 354 00:25:28,986 --> 00:25:31,780 Just that... we've lost Hannah, 355 00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:34,950 but not the things she gave us. 356 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:40,873 Compassion, understanding, love. 357 00:25:43,041 --> 00:25:44,042 Those don't go away. 358 00:26:00,434 --> 00:26:02,603 How do we take care of ourselves 359 00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:04,897 and look after each other? 360 00:26:07,441 --> 00:26:08,734 And celebrate Hannah's life 361 00:26:08,817 --> 00:26:11,069 and let it remind us to hold on to each other... 362 00:26:13,739 --> 00:26:15,240 and to the precious time we have? 363 00:26:20,954 --> 00:26:22,706 Do you remember when we first met you? 364 00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:24,875 At that table over there? 365 00:26:26,084 --> 00:26:27,836 You thought we were crazy. 366 00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:32,382 No. I was just, like, terrified and amazed. 367 00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:34,968 I mean, you guys were fearless. 368 00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:37,763 I don't remember being fearless. 369 00:26:43,936 --> 00:26:47,231 This is, um... This is really inappropriate at a wake, 370 00:26:47,481 --> 00:26:49,900 especially given the whole history, but... 371 00:26:51,235 --> 00:26:53,612 I've been... I've been trying for, like, two weeks now 372 00:26:53,695 --> 00:26:56,198 to get up the nerve to ask you, um... 373 00:26:57,157 --> 00:26:59,618 if you would wanna go to the Spring Fling 374 00:26:59,952 --> 00:27:02,871 as, like, people who date? 375 00:27:03,121 --> 00:27:05,749 Because I think that we are now, but I'm not really sure. 376 00:27:07,459 --> 00:27:08,293 Um... 377 00:27:09,711 --> 00:27:11,380 I think we are. 378 00:27:11,964 --> 00:27:12,798 Yeah? 379 00:27:13,257 --> 00:27:17,845 I mean, I'm not sure how ready I am to be a person who dates, but... 380 00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:19,680 I mean, we are. 381 00:27:21,139 --> 00:27:22,474 -So, yes. -Yeah? 382 00:27:22,558 --> 00:27:24,309 - Yes. - Okay. Oh, God. 383 00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:26,854 Is it okay that I asked you out at Hannah's table? 384 00:27:26,937 --> 00:27:28,564 Oh, it's all of our table. 385 00:27:29,606 --> 00:27:31,191 And I think she'd be okay with it. 386 00:27:32,192 --> 00:27:34,820 She'd probably make you interpret some weird painting. 387 00:27:35,654 --> 00:27:38,031 Yeah, who picks the paintings? 388 00:27:38,490 --> 00:27:41,410 Yo, dude! 389 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:44,079 Oh, my God, you're crushing me! 390 00:27:45,330 --> 00:27:48,041 You're, like, down to nothing. We gotta get you on a program. 391 00:27:48,125 --> 00:27:48,959 Okay, sure. 392 00:27:49,376 --> 00:27:52,212 How the fuck did Bryce only get three months and you got six? 393 00:27:53,630 --> 00:27:54,464 Aren't you pissed? 394 00:27:55,382 --> 00:27:57,050 I guess I just wasn't surprised. 395 00:27:58,176 --> 00:28:00,554 Actually, I'm gonna take a gap year. I'm going to Europe. 396 00:28:00,637 --> 00:28:04,182 Which, I know, sounds like a cliché, but, honestly, Asia is the cliché. 397 00:28:04,266 --> 00:28:06,226 I mean, I could be going to Goa, but I'm not. 398 00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:07,394 I'm old school. 399 00:28:08,395 --> 00:28:12,149 I've actually been thinking about doing some traveling myself. 400 00:28:12,232 --> 00:28:14,192 Oh, my God, you should. You so should. 401 00:28:14,651 --> 00:28:16,612 It's annoying how smart she is. 402 00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:18,780 I don't like it when people are smarter than me. 403 00:28:18,864 --> 00:28:20,282 But it's fine because she's cute. 404 00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:22,743 It's so nice that everyone came. 405 00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:30,751 Maybe I should, uh, leave the two of you alone to catch up? 406 00:28:32,544 --> 00:28:34,379 Maybe you have some things to talk about. 407 00:28:35,881 --> 00:28:37,883 Yes. Yeah, there are. 408 00:28:38,967 --> 00:28:39,801 Okay. 409 00:28:47,684 --> 00:28:49,436 What... What things? 410 00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:54,650 So, um... 411 00:28:56,026 --> 00:28:59,529 I think my mom explained to you how she got you released into emergency custody. 412 00:28:59,780 --> 00:29:00,906 Yeah, she explained it. 413 00:29:01,657 --> 00:29:03,700 The thing is that's only temporary. 414 00:29:04,493 --> 00:29:06,787 And because you're not 18 for almost a year, 415 00:29:06,870 --> 00:29:09,581 once that expires, you become a ward of the state. 416 00:29:09,748 --> 00:29:12,000 Yeah, the... the social worker told me about that. 417 00:29:12,417 --> 00:29:13,252 Okay, yeah. 418 00:29:13,710 --> 00:29:16,838 And there's only two group homes in this county you'd be eligible for, 419 00:29:16,922 --> 00:29:19,675 and you couldn't finish school at Liberty and stuff. 420 00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:21,635 And my parents... 421 00:29:23,637 --> 00:29:25,514 I mean, me and my parents... 422 00:29:28,475 --> 00:29:31,270 wanted to see if you might want them to adopt you. 423 00:29:34,231 --> 00:29:37,693 Wait, what? 424 00:29:38,485 --> 00:29:41,905 Like, adopt you into our family. 425 00:29:42,114 --> 00:29:44,283 You mean, like, I'd be your brother? 426 00:29:44,741 --> 00:29:48,704 Well, I'm-I'm not familiar with all the lingo, but-- 427 00:29:48,787 --> 00:29:50,539 Wait. Why are you asking me and not them? 428 00:29:52,541 --> 00:29:54,751 Because it was their idea, to be honest. 429 00:29:55,752 --> 00:29:58,547 And at first, I thought it sounded, um... 430 00:29:59,715 --> 00:30:00,590 idiotic. 431 00:30:01,091 --> 00:30:04,052 And they left it up to me, 432 00:30:04,136 --> 00:30:07,514 seeing as I was the person who brought you in their life in the first place. 433 00:30:08,140 --> 00:30:09,016 And... 434 00:30:10,309 --> 00:30:12,936 maybe it's a good idea, so... 435 00:30:18,442 --> 00:30:19,276 Are you... 436 00:30:20,694 --> 00:30:22,070 Are you crying? 437 00:30:24,239 --> 00:30:26,241 You know I'm, like, really fucked up, right? 438 00:30:28,285 --> 00:30:31,121 Well... A, yes. 439 00:30:31,330 --> 00:30:33,749 But you're clean and going to meetings. 440 00:30:34,916 --> 00:30:39,838 And B, I'm also fucked up in certain ways, so... 441 00:30:45,093 --> 00:30:46,094 Okay, yeah. 442 00:30:49,306 --> 00:30:50,932 I'd like to be adopted, yeah. 443 00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:55,145 Okay. Cool. 444 00:31:11,119 --> 00:31:13,080 Everything affects everything. 445 00:31:15,123 --> 00:31:17,042 Everyone affects everyone. 446 00:31:28,678 --> 00:31:30,472 Fucking Tyler Down is back. 447 00:31:31,223 --> 00:31:32,099 So? 448 00:31:32,974 --> 00:31:34,976 So, I wanna break his head open. 449 00:31:35,769 --> 00:31:38,230 Yeah, that's a great idea at this particular time. 450 00:31:38,772 --> 00:31:41,233 The field, the thing with Marcus... 451 00:31:41,316 --> 00:31:43,527 He cost us our season. We need to do something. 452 00:31:43,610 --> 00:31:45,529 We are not gonna do a goddamn thing. 453 00:31:46,279 --> 00:31:47,447 I'm on probation. 454 00:31:48,073 --> 00:31:50,492 Right, I know. I got you. I'll take care of it. 455 00:31:52,285 --> 00:31:55,747 Your father didn't beat you hard enough, 'cause you're still a fucking idiot. 456 00:31:56,206 --> 00:31:59,251 The last time you tried to help, you almost fucked up my whole plea deal. 457 00:31:59,418 --> 00:32:00,877 Well, none of it came back to you. 458 00:32:00,961 --> 00:32:04,172 No one was gonna believe I didn't know about all the shit that you did. 459 00:32:04,256 --> 00:32:06,174 I had to give you my goddamn lawyer. 460 00:32:06,675 --> 00:32:09,928 I would've taken the fall if I had to. I kept you clean. 461 00:32:10,804 --> 00:32:13,890 What did you think would happen if you killed Clay Jensen in my car? 462 00:32:13,974 --> 00:32:16,935 I knew those kids could fuck everything up for us, and they did. 463 00:32:17,477 --> 00:32:18,854 Well, you helped. 464 00:32:21,481 --> 00:32:25,026 I... Tell me what you want me to do. 465 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:28,321 -Okay? I'll make it right. -I want you to leave it alone. 466 00:32:30,198 --> 00:32:31,450 And leave me alone. 467 00:32:32,242 --> 00:32:33,076 We're done. 468 00:32:48,049 --> 00:32:49,926 Mack said you guys had a good talk. 469 00:32:50,969 --> 00:32:53,722 Yeah. She's dating Eric now, huh? 470 00:32:56,683 --> 00:32:57,559 Yeah, that's cool. 471 00:32:58,310 --> 00:32:59,144 You're okay, right? 472 00:32:59,519 --> 00:33:01,688 I mean, watching out for yourself? 473 00:33:02,230 --> 00:33:05,150 Those fucking jocks were not happy about the field and the season. 474 00:33:07,360 --> 00:33:09,446 -Yeah. I'll be careful. -Good. 475 00:33:09,613 --> 00:33:10,447 And you know... 476 00:33:12,407 --> 00:33:13,241 about everything... 477 00:33:13,617 --> 00:33:16,119 Yeah. No, me, too. Yeah. 478 00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:19,206 - It got a little fucked up. - Yeah, totally. 479 00:33:20,499 --> 00:33:21,333 Hey. 480 00:33:22,417 --> 00:33:26,296 You know, being away, it was really good. 481 00:33:27,255 --> 00:33:29,841 And I realized a lot of shit, so... 482 00:33:30,091 --> 00:33:31,676 -You know. -That's good, man. 483 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:34,387 So, we're all right? 484 00:33:34,804 --> 00:33:35,805 Yeah, for sure. 485 00:33:35,889 --> 00:33:37,349 - Cool. - Yeah. 486 00:33:37,766 --> 00:33:40,018 Hey, maybe we could catch another show sometime. 487 00:33:42,145 --> 00:33:43,522 I don't know, man. I... 488 00:33:45,315 --> 00:33:46,149 I don't think so. 489 00:33:47,484 --> 00:33:51,446 But it's great to see that you're back and doing so well. 490 00:33:53,365 --> 00:33:54,282 Yeah. Thanks, man. 491 00:33:56,576 --> 00:33:58,453 I mean, how are you even not crazy? 492 00:33:58,537 --> 00:33:59,871 I just... 493 00:34:00,872 --> 00:34:04,167 It's insane, but it's, like, not a surprise, I guess. 494 00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:07,045 And I-I just feel this peace that it's over. 495 00:34:07,128 --> 00:34:07,963 So, it's over? 496 00:34:08,338 --> 00:34:10,423 No trial, no more legal stuff? Done? 497 00:34:10,799 --> 00:34:11,633 Done. 498 00:34:13,176 --> 00:34:14,010 And I'm good. 499 00:34:31,861 --> 00:34:33,196 You gonna go to this dance? 500 00:34:35,991 --> 00:34:37,742 What, the Spring Fling thing? 501 00:34:38,868 --> 00:34:41,413 -Why in the world would I go to that? -I don't know. 502 00:34:41,871 --> 00:34:43,081 It... It might be fun? 503 00:34:43,790 --> 00:34:45,000 I don't go to dances. 504 00:34:46,376 --> 00:34:47,210 You can go. 505 00:34:47,627 --> 00:34:48,545 No. 506 00:34:49,838 --> 00:34:53,341 I just thought that it'd be my first thing back 507 00:34:53,425 --> 00:34:59,180 and I could show people that I'm not, like, hiding or whatever. 508 00:35:02,934 --> 00:35:04,436 Forget it. 509 00:35:07,564 --> 00:35:08,398 Fuck. 510 00:35:09,399 --> 00:35:11,818 Fine. We'll go. 511 00:35:15,071 --> 00:35:19,367 I just thought since I hadn't heard from you after I told you about Lucas-- 512 00:35:19,451 --> 00:35:20,910 Yeah, I left you three messages. 513 00:35:21,202 --> 00:35:24,998 Yeah, and they didn't sound like you really wanted me to call back. 514 00:35:25,081 --> 00:35:27,208 Okay, okay. Seriously? 515 00:35:27,959 --> 00:35:29,836 I think you're used to people chasing you. 516 00:35:30,712 --> 00:35:32,631 And you're used to getting away. 517 00:35:35,425 --> 00:35:36,259 Maybe. 518 00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:39,596 Well, you're not getting away. 519 00:35:48,813 --> 00:35:49,814 I should be on my way. 520 00:35:52,484 --> 00:35:53,568 Thank you for coming. 521 00:35:53,652 --> 00:35:57,989 Thank you for... for having us. 522 00:35:58,823 --> 00:36:00,825 I saw the store's for lease. 523 00:36:01,910 --> 00:36:03,161 I'm moving to New York. 524 00:36:04,329 --> 00:36:05,622 It was always Hannah's dream. 525 00:36:05,705 --> 00:36:09,084 She never made it, so I'll get there for her. 526 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:11,795 I... 527 00:36:14,923 --> 00:36:18,259 I wasn't sure if I should share this with you, 528 00:36:18,343 --> 00:36:20,428 but after hearing what you said, I think... 529 00:36:22,097 --> 00:36:23,181 I think it's all right. 530 00:36:31,439 --> 00:36:35,443 I found it on one of the old computers when I was cleaning up the store. 531 00:36:39,114 --> 00:36:40,031 Hannah wrote it. 532 00:36:53,837 --> 00:36:54,963 "Reasons why not." 533 00:36:56,089 --> 00:36:57,090 You're on there. 534 00:36:57,549 --> 00:37:00,927 At least once, possibly twice. 535 00:37:01,010 --> 00:37:03,847 Did... did she call you "Helmet"? 536 00:37:06,725 --> 00:37:08,351 Yeah, she did. 537 00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:14,607 Eleven reasons. 538 00:37:15,567 --> 00:37:18,069 She came up just short. 539 00:37:19,237 --> 00:37:21,489 But she left so many out. You know that, don't you? 540 00:37:21,781 --> 00:37:26,536 No matter how many reasons there might be "why," 541 00:37:27,370 --> 00:37:28,830 there are always more "why not." 542 00:37:30,498 --> 00:37:31,332 I do. 543 00:37:40,759 --> 00:37:42,969 I wish I knew you when she was alive. 544 00:37:48,558 --> 00:37:50,059 I wish you'd known me then, too. 545 00:37:53,104 --> 00:37:53,938 Well... 546 00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:56,941 bye. 547 00:37:58,818 --> 00:37:59,652 Bye. 548 00:38:17,712 --> 00:38:19,798 Why the fuck did you come back? 549 00:38:23,009 --> 00:38:24,219 I finished my program. 550 00:38:26,054 --> 00:38:27,847 Yeah, you fucked up a lot of shit. 551 00:38:31,684 --> 00:38:32,977 I'm sorry about everything. 552 00:38:34,479 --> 00:38:37,273 -If I hurt you in any way-- -They canceled our fucking season. 553 00:38:39,025 --> 00:38:41,486 I was acting out of a lot of anger and confusion. 554 00:38:41,569 --> 00:38:43,279 -Oh, yeah? -And I'm going to do better. 555 00:38:43,738 --> 00:38:45,990 And I hope that we can learn to talk to each other-- 556 00:38:49,077 --> 00:38:51,955 God! You ruined my fucking life, faggot! 557 00:38:53,039 --> 00:38:53,873 Get up! 558 00:38:57,293 --> 00:38:59,587 I'm sorry! Please, I'm sorry! 559 00:39:01,214 --> 00:39:02,048 Hold him! 560 00:39:03,550 --> 00:39:05,343 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 561 00:39:45,300 --> 00:39:46,467 We can get better. 562 00:39:47,218 --> 00:39:48,261 We can do better. 563 00:39:49,596 --> 00:39:52,974 But we still live in a world that is out to break us any way it can. 564 00:39:54,851 --> 00:39:57,228 -Yo, so how's the car? -It's getting pretty close. 565 00:39:57,604 --> 00:39:59,689 I've been working on it every hour I'm not in school 566 00:39:59,772 --> 00:40:01,274 and some when I should be in school. 567 00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:04,444 It was a beautiful car. Hey, why don't we go to your place? 568 00:40:05,737 --> 00:40:08,573 -All right? -I think your place is closer. 569 00:40:09,032 --> 00:40:10,450 I'm in the opposite direction. 570 00:40:12,493 --> 00:40:14,913 -You don't want me to meet your family. -It's not that. 571 00:40:15,705 --> 00:40:16,789 I just need some time. 572 00:40:17,749 --> 00:40:19,667 All right. I'll see you tomorrow? 573 00:40:20,585 --> 00:40:23,755 Um, you know, I got some bullshit I gotta take care of. 574 00:40:23,838 --> 00:40:25,214 Oh, some bullshit, like a dance? 575 00:40:26,758 --> 00:40:29,093 Yeah, Alex and Jess are going. It's like a thing. 576 00:40:29,177 --> 00:40:30,970 Yeah, you see, that's bullshit. 577 00:40:31,054 --> 00:40:33,181 And I didn't wanna subject you to it, so... 578 00:40:33,264 --> 00:40:34,265 I appreciate that. 579 00:40:36,059 --> 00:40:38,102 -You'll come by after? -Yes. 580 00:40:40,647 --> 00:40:45,234 And my mom got me some game that's about being a flower or some shit. 581 00:40:45,318 --> 00:40:47,111 I'm serious. 582 00:40:47,195 --> 00:40:50,698 But I talked my dad into driving since he won't let me drive for real yet. 583 00:40:50,990 --> 00:40:53,952 -Excellent use of guilt, sir. -Yeah, I thought so. 584 00:40:55,119 --> 00:40:56,913 I beat off three times this morning. 585 00:40:58,122 --> 00:41:00,166 I don't wanna know that. Why would you tell me? 586 00:41:00,333 --> 00:41:02,001 'Cause I thought you'd be happy for me. 587 00:41:04,420 --> 00:41:08,132 Actually, I-I'm very happy for you. That's, uh, impressive. 588 00:41:08,424 --> 00:41:09,300 -Thank you. -Yeah. 589 00:41:11,386 --> 00:41:14,305 I'm worried about dancing with Jess. 590 00:41:15,181 --> 00:41:19,018 Like, I-I don't wanna go to the dance and just sit there, 'cause that's stupid. 591 00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,187 And it doesn't get me closer to kissing her. 592 00:41:21,270 --> 00:41:24,273 So I wanna dance with her, but I think I'll just fall over. 593 00:41:24,691 --> 00:41:27,986 No, just, um, lean on her. 594 00:41:28,236 --> 00:41:31,114 What, like, a middle school slow dance? That's so dumb. 595 00:41:31,197 --> 00:41:34,617 No. Just, you know, like, let her help. Make it seem smooth. 596 00:41:35,034 --> 00:41:37,412 Okay, yeah, that makes sense. 597 00:41:38,371 --> 00:41:40,498 You know, I am sick of your "poor-me" attitude. 598 00:41:40,581 --> 00:41:43,292 This one's easy. Come on, get up. 599 00:41:44,168 --> 00:41:46,337 No. This is embarrassing. 600 00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:48,006 This is embarrassing? 601 00:41:48,715 --> 00:41:50,883 -Yeah. -Yeah, okay, you've done worse. 602 00:41:51,592 --> 00:41:53,511 Come on, put the controller down. Let's go. 603 00:41:54,303 --> 00:41:55,847 Come on. 604 00:41:56,764 --> 00:41:58,349 I have to school you... 605 00:42:00,727 --> 00:42:03,813 -Okay. -My mom made me do some dance... 606 00:42:03,980 --> 00:42:05,857 Don't-- Never mind. Don't even worry about that. 607 00:42:05,940 --> 00:42:07,984 So, good hand on her waist. 608 00:42:08,818 --> 00:42:11,487 -Left hand on her hip. -Yeah. 609 00:42:11,571 --> 00:42:13,906 She'll hold it and just lean into her. 610 00:42:14,282 --> 00:42:16,284 -Okay? -What about--? 611 00:42:16,576 --> 00:42:18,327 Just try stepping. There you go. 612 00:42:18,870 --> 00:42:19,996 All the way in there. 613 00:42:20,913 --> 00:42:21,748 Yeah. 614 00:42:22,582 --> 00:42:23,416 See? 615 00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:26,252 The song will have to be pretty slow, shouldn't it? 616 00:42:29,422 --> 00:42:31,966 So, it turns out the sushi place doesn't in fact deliver, 617 00:42:32,050 --> 00:42:34,594 so my dad and I are gonna pick it up. You wanna come? 618 00:42:36,512 --> 00:42:38,097 Nah, I'm... I'm good here. 619 00:42:39,807 --> 00:42:41,184 These are kind of addictive. 620 00:42:41,434 --> 00:42:42,643 Yeah, right? 621 00:42:45,897 --> 00:42:46,731 You okay? 622 00:42:48,524 --> 00:42:49,442 You seem weird. 623 00:42:50,818 --> 00:42:51,736 I think, maybe... 624 00:42:54,405 --> 00:42:55,239 I'm happy. 625 00:42:56,365 --> 00:42:57,200 Oh. 626 00:42:58,910 --> 00:42:59,744 Cool. 627 00:44:43,764 --> 00:44:47,351 Well? How was the first day back? 628 00:44:48,019 --> 00:44:49,979 Good. It was good. 629 00:44:50,062 --> 00:44:53,399 It was, um... like, I had to adjust to everything, but it was great. 630 00:44:53,900 --> 00:44:57,278 Yeah, there's a new guidance counselor, and she's totally smart, so... 631 00:44:59,488 --> 00:45:01,699 -I think it's gonna work, Mom. -That's great. 632 00:45:02,575 --> 00:45:04,660 Oh, that's so great, Tyler. 633 00:45:07,121 --> 00:45:09,457 Oh. We are so proud of you. 634 00:45:45,534 --> 00:45:48,371 Now bring that around to the right. No, no, no, the big end. 635 00:45:49,121 --> 00:45:50,748 -The big end. -That's what I'm doing. 636 00:45:50,831 --> 00:45:53,000 That's not what you're doing. Oh, my God, start over. 637 00:45:53,084 --> 00:45:56,212 - Would you fucking relax? - You-- You don't listen! 638 00:45:57,380 --> 00:45:58,714 You are so uptight. 639 00:45:59,006 --> 00:46:01,717 I am not uptight. It was your idea that we should wear ties. 640 00:46:01,801 --> 00:46:03,135 It's not even a formal dance. 641 00:46:03,219 --> 00:46:06,013 And if you wanna wear a tie, you should follow my instructions. 642 00:46:07,848 --> 00:46:09,225 We really need to get you laid. 643 00:46:10,810 --> 00:46:12,603 Shut up. Start over. 644 00:46:13,938 --> 00:46:15,231 Seriously, Jensen. 645 00:46:15,481 --> 00:46:18,025 Okay? You help me tie a tie, I will help you get laid. 646 00:46:18,442 --> 00:46:19,485 I don't need your help. 647 00:46:20,277 --> 00:46:23,197 I-- I know. I was just... I was just saying. 648 00:46:26,993 --> 00:46:28,327 I mean, you've had, like, 649 00:46:29,745 --> 00:46:31,539 a lot of sex, haven't you? 650 00:46:32,248 --> 00:46:35,292 Yeah, I've... I've had a good amount. 651 00:46:46,470 --> 00:46:48,055 So, how do we survive? 652 00:46:48,806 --> 00:46:51,934 How do we bring light to a world that seems only dark? 653 00:46:53,769 --> 00:46:57,148 This is the first dance I haven't DJ'd in two years. 654 00:46:57,815 --> 00:46:59,191 So now you get to dance. 655 00:46:59,442 --> 00:47:01,736 Dude, people become DJs so they don't have to dance. 656 00:47:02,611 --> 00:47:04,989 I thought it was because you had great taste in music. 657 00:47:05,281 --> 00:47:06,782 That's just my gift to the world. 658 00:47:50,367 --> 00:47:51,285 Good evening. 659 00:47:54,163 --> 00:47:56,457 Good evening. Did-- Did you do this? 660 00:47:57,374 --> 00:47:59,752 I got him a guest pass. Apparently, you forgot to. 661 00:48:04,173 --> 00:48:06,050 I didn't go to dances when I was in school 662 00:48:06,133 --> 00:48:08,177 because I felt so awkward dancing with girls. 663 00:48:09,220 --> 00:48:11,680 It may seem like high school bullshit to you, but to me, 664 00:48:11,764 --> 00:48:14,016 it's finally being able to dance with my boyfriend. 665 00:48:15,101 --> 00:48:16,018 If he will. 666 00:48:16,393 --> 00:48:17,394 Of course I will. 667 00:48:18,020 --> 00:48:20,147 After bitching about the DJ. 668 00:48:23,984 --> 00:48:25,361 Yeah, me, too. 669 00:48:27,780 --> 00:48:28,614 Hey. 670 00:48:29,281 --> 00:48:30,116 Hey. 671 00:48:33,828 --> 00:48:34,787 You guys look good. 672 00:48:35,454 --> 00:48:37,414 Thanks. Yeah, I bedazzled the cane, so... 673 00:48:39,333 --> 00:48:40,251 I didn't, really. 674 00:48:40,584 --> 00:48:42,461 Well, if we have to do this, let's do it. 675 00:48:43,629 --> 00:48:44,505 Okay. 676 00:48:45,005 --> 00:48:45,881 All right. 677 00:48:45,965 --> 00:48:47,007 -You ready? -Yep. 678 00:48:47,091 --> 00:48:48,384 All right. 679 00:49:01,856 --> 00:49:04,066 -Tony. Caleb. Hey! -Hey, what's up? 680 00:49:04,150 --> 00:49:06,068 -Hi. This is Tamika. -Hey, Tamika. 681 00:49:06,152 --> 00:49:06,986 -Hi, Tamika. -Hi. 682 00:49:07,069 --> 00:49:07,987 She's my girlfriend. 683 00:49:08,070 --> 00:49:09,864 Oh. 684 00:49:35,639 --> 00:49:37,183 You sure you don't wanna sit down? 685 00:49:37,641 --> 00:49:40,728 No, I don't wanna sit. I wanna dance. I just need to work up to it. 686 00:49:41,395 --> 00:49:44,481 -You want a drink? -You know they're non-alcoholic. 687 00:49:44,565 --> 00:49:46,317 Yeah, but any chance for sugar. 688 00:49:51,447 --> 00:49:53,282 You would've been really good for Hannah. 689 00:49:54,700 --> 00:49:55,784 I'm just saying. 690 00:49:57,328 --> 00:50:01,373 Yeah? You know, if I didn't fuck it up like I fuck up everything else. 691 00:50:02,166 --> 00:50:05,002 Dude, you do not wanna be having that contest with me. 692 00:50:08,964 --> 00:50:10,883 I'm really sorry you couldn't talk to me. 693 00:50:13,344 --> 00:50:15,012 Come on. We gotta go in for this one! 694 00:50:15,095 --> 00:50:17,014 Okay, but it's full contact. 695 00:50:17,223 --> 00:50:18,682 This dance desperately needs it. 696 00:50:18,766 --> 00:50:20,184 -Yeah! -Fuck this. Let's go. 697 00:50:22,645 --> 00:50:25,689 Jensen, come on. Are you about kicking ass or are you not? 698 00:50:26,774 --> 00:50:27,608 I'm... 699 00:50:32,112 --> 00:50:32,947 I am. 700 00:50:35,324 --> 00:50:36,158 I totally am. 701 00:50:40,287 --> 00:50:41,121 Hey, come on. 702 00:50:43,832 --> 00:50:46,835 If Jeff Atkins were here, he'd say, "Get your asses up and come on." 703 00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:52,174 Guys, come on! Come on! 704 00:51:10,567 --> 00:51:12,778 How can we find joy in our lives... 705 00:51:13,988 --> 00:51:15,406 in this world after Hannah? 706 00:51:34,049 --> 00:51:35,759 Compared to them, I look all right. 707 00:51:42,808 --> 00:51:44,893 How do we take what hurts most? 708 00:51:46,103 --> 00:51:49,231 Take the darkness and turn it into light? 709 00:51:56,572 --> 00:51:58,574 I think the answer is we love each other. 710 00:52:06,915 --> 00:52:07,916 Easy to say. 711 00:52:08,834 --> 00:52:10,711 But what do we do when it's hard to love? 712 00:52:35,903 --> 00:52:36,987 You want a real drink? 713 00:52:40,199 --> 00:52:41,492 No, thanks. I'm good. 714 00:52:49,291 --> 00:52:52,628 - Brings back memories, huh? - I heard you were transferring. 715 00:52:53,629 --> 00:52:54,463 Yeah. 716 00:52:55,339 --> 00:52:56,590 Yeah, I'm gonna start over. 717 00:52:58,884 --> 00:52:59,802 Lucky you. 718 00:53:03,972 --> 00:53:05,182 I'm gonna miss this. 719 00:53:07,518 --> 00:53:08,352 All of it. 720 00:53:13,232 --> 00:53:14,525 You remember freshman year? 721 00:53:14,858 --> 00:53:16,985 The night before our first day, you stayed over. 722 00:53:18,112 --> 00:53:21,532 We stayed up talking about how we were gonna be kings of this fucking school. 723 00:53:24,368 --> 00:53:25,244 Yeah, I remember. 724 00:53:27,663 --> 00:53:28,789 I'll always remember. 725 00:53:33,585 --> 00:53:34,461 Me, too, brother. 726 00:53:39,550 --> 00:53:40,384 Justin. 727 00:53:43,429 --> 00:53:45,556 - You okay? - He's fine. 728 00:53:46,557 --> 00:53:49,768 I can't touch him. Or you, or I go to jail. 729 00:53:50,936 --> 00:53:52,813 Funny. I don't have that problem. 730 00:53:56,358 --> 00:53:57,651 You're a good kid, Clay. 731 00:53:58,068 --> 00:54:00,612 You need to get laid, but you're a good kid. 732 00:54:12,708 --> 00:54:13,584 You all right? 733 00:54:14,751 --> 00:54:15,627 Yeah, I just... 734 00:54:18,130 --> 00:54:20,591 I'm gonna go use the bathroom for a quick minute, okay? 735 00:54:20,674 --> 00:54:21,884 I'll... I'll be right back. 736 00:55:20,317 --> 00:55:21,693 Yeah. 737 00:55:21,777 --> 00:55:23,278 - Whoo! - One more, guys. 738 00:55:23,362 --> 00:55:24,196 I can't... 739 00:55:48,470 --> 00:55:49,304 Oh, shit. 740 00:55:50,222 --> 00:55:51,098 I gotta find Clay. 741 00:58:09,069 --> 00:58:11,154 What are you doing alone in the dark? 742 00:58:12,948 --> 00:58:13,824 It's creepy. 743 00:58:16,451 --> 00:58:18,120 I'm not alone anymore, am I? 744 00:58:20,914 --> 00:58:22,165 What's with these mats? 745 00:58:23,166 --> 00:58:25,252 They must have had a wrestling meet yesterday. 746 00:58:25,585 --> 00:58:26,962 Wait, we have a wrestling team? 747 00:58:27,337 --> 00:58:30,215 -You were a cheerleader. -Not for the wrestling team. 748 00:58:31,466 --> 00:58:33,093 And I was a shitty cheerleader. 749 00:58:34,678 --> 00:58:35,637 Yeah, you were. 750 00:58:37,973 --> 00:58:40,100 -What? You said it. -Still. 751 00:58:46,148 --> 00:58:47,274 You look beautiful. 752 00:58:50,986 --> 00:58:51,820 Sorry. 753 00:58:53,363 --> 00:58:55,741 -For saying I look beautiful? -Yes. 754 00:59:00,996 --> 00:59:04,833 So you're, like, living with Clay for real now, huh? 755 00:59:07,502 --> 00:59:08,336 Yeah. 756 00:59:09,671 --> 00:59:10,797 They're adopting me. 757 00:59:12,799 --> 00:59:16,011 Which, like, why anyone would wanna do that, I don't know. 758 00:59:16,762 --> 00:59:17,596 I do. 759 00:59:30,567 --> 00:59:31,777 Do you ever think about it? 760 00:59:34,946 --> 00:59:36,156 Doing what Hannah did? 761 00:59:37,699 --> 00:59:38,533 No. 762 00:59:39,534 --> 00:59:40,368 I don't. 763 00:59:42,746 --> 00:59:44,581 With everything that happened, I... 764 00:59:46,875 --> 00:59:48,585 I never thought that was a way to go. 765 00:59:52,089 --> 00:59:53,632 I've had some shitty days. 766 00:59:55,467 --> 00:59:56,301 But... 767 00:59:58,595 --> 01:00:01,181 -I always wanted to live. -Yeah. 768 01:00:02,849 --> 01:00:05,018 -I wanted to be alive. -I know. 769 01:00:39,261 --> 01:00:41,888 Cy, you better look at this. I just got this text. 770 01:00:44,933 --> 01:00:46,143 Jesus, Mack. 771 01:01:00,949 --> 01:01:02,576 We can't let him do this. We have to stop him. 772 01:01:02,659 --> 01:01:04,828 We need to get out of here. We need to call the cops. 773 01:01:05,078 --> 01:01:06,788 -Agreed. -If we do, his life is over. 774 01:01:06,872 --> 01:01:09,749 His life is over either way. He's either going to jail or he's dead. 775 01:01:09,958 --> 01:01:12,252 Tyler doesn't wanna die. I know he doesn't. 776 01:01:12,919 --> 01:01:13,753 Where's Tony? 777 01:01:13,962 --> 01:01:15,922 -What's going on, guys? -Have you seen Jess? 778 01:01:31,897 --> 01:01:33,023 -Jess-- -Don't. 779 01:01:33,106 --> 01:01:35,859 -Please? -What? What do you want? 780 01:01:37,694 --> 01:01:39,279 -I don't know what to do. -Really? 781 01:01:39,613 --> 01:01:42,532 -You don't know what to do? -Jess, I'm pregnant. 782 01:01:48,330 --> 01:01:50,624 The next time someone is in desperate need... 783 01:01:54,211 --> 01:01:56,171 and they're about to make a terrible mistake, 784 01:01:57,422 --> 01:01:58,256 what do we do? 785 01:02:04,012 --> 01:02:05,305 Justin, find Jessica. 786 01:02:05,388 --> 01:02:08,099 Get everyone you can. Lock the doors, stay inside. 787 01:02:08,433 --> 01:02:09,601 And don't call the police. 788 01:02:09,935 --> 01:02:10,894 I gotta find Tony. 789 01:02:12,145 --> 01:02:13,563 What the fuck? Clay! 790 01:02:17,484 --> 01:02:18,944 Do we look the other way? 791 01:02:19,861 --> 01:02:22,364 Do we just protect ourselves or do we help them? 792 01:02:26,701 --> 01:02:29,079 Do we do whatever we can to save them? 793 01:02:33,124 --> 01:02:35,377 I think I know what Hannah would want us to do. 794 01:02:39,506 --> 01:02:40,340 Tyler! 795 01:02:41,424 --> 01:02:42,425 Tyler, what are you... 796 01:02:43,343 --> 01:02:44,177 what are you doing? 797 01:02:51,184 --> 01:02:52,811 Get out of here, Clay. Go home. 798 01:02:53,645 --> 01:02:55,814 No. No, I... 799 01:02:56,189 --> 01:02:57,774 Don't... Don't do this, Tyler. 800 01:03:00,735 --> 01:03:02,028 You need to leave right now. 801 01:03:02,737 --> 01:03:06,116 Tyler, please, listen to me. You don't wanna do this. 802 01:03:06,491 --> 01:03:07,492 I... I know you don't. 803 01:03:08,785 --> 01:03:10,620 You don't fucking know anything about me. 804 01:03:11,162 --> 01:03:14,291 No. No, I do. I do know because I hurt, too. 805 01:03:14,749 --> 01:03:17,419 I'm pissed off. I didn't realize how bad it was for you. 806 01:03:17,502 --> 01:03:18,920 And I'm sorry that I didn't. 807 01:03:19,004 --> 01:03:20,297 - Clay! - I should've-- 808 01:03:20,380 --> 01:03:21,673 Hey, g-go back inside. 809 01:03:21,756 --> 01:03:23,800 -Jesus, Clay! -Go inside! 810 01:03:25,969 --> 01:03:27,220 Get out of my fucking way. 811 01:03:27,304 --> 01:03:29,806 Tyler, please. Don't do it. 812 01:03:31,266 --> 01:03:33,351 -I have to. -No, you don't have to. 813 01:03:34,894 --> 01:03:35,812 You can turn around. 814 01:03:36,396 --> 01:03:39,065 You can go home. 815 01:03:40,859 --> 01:03:42,193 Everybody knows already. 816 01:03:42,360 --> 01:03:44,571 The only people that know are people who know you, 817 01:03:44,654 --> 01:03:45,989 and they wanna help you. 818 01:03:47,324 --> 01:03:48,742 -Bullshit. -No, look. 819 01:03:49,451 --> 01:03:51,953 Tyler, they know you're hurting, we all are. 820 01:03:52,037 --> 01:03:54,456 And I don't know what to do about it, either. 821 01:03:55,040 --> 01:03:56,666 Okay? I tried hurting other people. 822 01:03:56,750 --> 01:03:59,377 I tried hurting you, and it didn't fucking help, man. 823 01:04:00,253 --> 01:04:02,464 It doesn't do any good. Listen to me. It doesn't! 824 01:04:06,217 --> 01:04:08,511 Tyler, listen. You don't get out of this alive. 825 01:04:08,595 --> 01:04:09,888 And I don't want you to die. 826 01:04:18,146 --> 01:04:19,606 I-I don't want you to die. 827 01:04:26,738 --> 01:04:28,573 If you think this is the way, 828 01:04:29,783 --> 01:04:31,993 if you really think this'll change a goddamn thing 829 01:04:32,619 --> 01:04:34,579 and not just be another fucking tragedy 830 01:04:34,662 --> 01:04:37,415 that adults cry about for a week and then forget, 831 01:04:37,499 --> 01:04:39,709 if you really think this is gonna be different, 832 01:04:44,923 --> 01:04:46,091 then do what you gotta do. 833 01:04:56,601 --> 01:04:57,602 Come on, Tyler. 834 01:05:05,026 --> 01:05:05,860 Please? 835 01:05:12,742 --> 01:05:14,327 There's nothing else I can do. 836 01:05:21,251 --> 01:05:22,085 There is. 837 01:05:25,088 --> 01:05:26,256 We'll figure it out. 838 01:05:27,298 --> 01:05:28,133 Okay? 839 01:05:31,344 --> 01:05:32,345 I swear. 840 01:05:47,402 --> 01:05:49,362 -What the fuck? -That's Tony. It's okay. 841 01:05:49,571 --> 01:05:50,738 It's Tony. We're gonna go. 842 01:05:52,282 --> 01:05:53,116 Get in the car! 843 01:05:53,408 --> 01:05:54,242 Let me help you. 844 01:05:54,742 --> 01:05:55,869 Come on. It's okay. 845 01:05:56,953 --> 01:05:57,954 Fuck. Go, come on. 846 01:05:58,121 --> 01:05:59,164 Come on. Get in the car. 847 01:06:04,794 --> 01:06:05,628 Clay! 848 01:06:07,464 --> 01:06:08,298 Clay! 849 01:06:09,716 --> 01:06:11,634 - Fuck. - Are you okay? 850 01:06:12,802 --> 01:06:13,636 No. 851 01:06:16,890 --> 01:06:18,183 This is fucked up, right? 852 01:06:26,524 --> 01:06:27,358 Yeah. 853 01:06:52,592 --> 01:06:56,888 For help finding crisis resources, visit 13reasonswhy.info.