1
00:00:02,250 --> 00:00:04,953
Max, I feel like this woman on Tinder
2
00:00:04,954 --> 00:00:07,055
is lying about her age.
3
00:00:07,056 --> 00:00:10,223
If she's 78, I'm 25.
4
00:00:12,093 --> 00:00:15,896
I'd say she's 80, but that rack is 40.
5
00:00:17,065 --> 00:00:20,401
Well, maybe I can squeeze her in tonight,
6
00:00:20,402 --> 00:00:22,737
but I already got eight dates.
7
00:00:22,738 --> 00:00:26,606
With my arthritis it's
impossible to swipe left.
8
00:00:32,448 --> 00:00:39,225
Subtitle sync and corrections
by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.
9
00:00:39,587 --> 00:00:42,334
Girls, you're going to
have to close up tonight.
10
00:00:42,335 --> 00:00:45,603
I'm pretty sure I have a date with Earl.
11
00:00:49,675 --> 00:00:53,679
Han, your only friend that
isn't imaginary is here.
12
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:56,815
He's dropping my VIP passes to Game Con.
13
00:00:56,816 --> 00:00:59,184
Ned's demo-ing the brand new video game
14
00:00:59,185 --> 00:01:01,019
he created, and I'll be there
15
00:01:01,020 --> 00:01:03,989
hanging out in the cosplayer's lair.
16
00:01:03,990 --> 00:01:07,325
Is that where you don't get laired?
17
00:01:08,927 --> 00:01:13,164
Thank God I didn't tell you
it was sponsored by Virgin.
18
00:01:14,633 --> 00:01:16,301
I don't get video games.
19
00:01:16,302 --> 00:01:19,404
In my day, if you wanted
to enter another reality
20
00:01:19,405 --> 00:01:23,508
you just took acid and
went to the aquarium.
21
00:01:23,509 --> 00:01:26,345
Game Con has awesome swag bags.
22
00:01:26,346 --> 00:01:28,246
This year they're handing out iPads,
23
00:01:28,247 --> 00:01:31,049
and last year I got the Microsoft Surface.
24
00:01:31,050 --> 00:01:35,219
You are a Microsoft surface.
25
00:01:36,321 --> 00:01:39,791
Have fun at Lollapa-loser.
26
00:01:39,792 --> 00:01:43,694
I would never go to Lame Con.
27
00:01:45,397 --> 00:01:47,265
I've got to go to Game Con!
28
00:01:47,266 --> 00:01:49,334
So we can make fun of Han some more?
29
00:01:49,335 --> 00:01:53,638
Because video games really seem
to be my put-down sweet spot.
30
00:01:53,639 --> 00:01:56,107
Caroline, it's about time you knew.
31
00:01:56,108 --> 00:01:58,476
I'm really into video games.
32
00:01:58,477 --> 00:02:00,879
I've known since I was ten.
33
00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:04,983
Max, are you coming out
to me as a game woman?
34
00:02:04,984 --> 00:02:07,385
There was this arcade
35
00:02:07,386 --> 00:02:10,021
at the pizza place my
mom used to leave me at.
36
00:02:10,022 --> 00:02:13,858
Ms. Pac-Man taught me
how to swallow pills.
37
00:02:13,859 --> 00:02:16,728
All right, well, if
we're confessing things,
38
00:02:16,729 --> 00:02:18,863
I really want a free iPad, so I guess
39
00:02:18,864 --> 00:02:20,298
you'll have to be nice to that nerd,
40
00:02:20,299 --> 00:02:22,532
even if he is a customer.
41
00:02:24,435 --> 00:02:25,737
All right, we got this.
42
00:02:25,738 --> 00:02:27,005
Suck it up.
43
00:02:27,006 --> 00:02:30,007
I'm not sucking anything.
44
00:02:30,008 --> 00:02:33,276
Hey, everybody!
45
00:02:37,815 --> 00:02:39,684
Well, I guess it's true what they say.
46
00:02:39,685 --> 00:02:41,919
You can't hire my manicurist
47
00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:45,255
to put an addition on your apartment, yeah.
48
00:02:46,023 --> 00:02:47,525
Oh, you're renovating.
49
00:02:47,526 --> 00:02:50,394
That explains the banging
and power drills I hear.
50
00:02:50,395 --> 00:02:53,397
Most of that was us.
51
00:02:53,398 --> 00:02:55,032
We got some new sex toys.
52
00:02:55,033 --> 00:02:58,469
It's like Santa's dirty workshop up there.
53
00:02:58,470 --> 00:03:00,805
See, we're splitting the boudoir in half
54
00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:03,340
so the baby can have its own bedroom.
55
00:03:03,341 --> 00:03:05,509
Its own bedroom?
56
00:03:05,510 --> 00:03:08,145
So the baby that you're
not even pregnant with yet
57
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:10,514
is doing better than old Caroline?
58
00:03:10,515 --> 00:03:14,251
No, Ming Wa wants me to
give up my walk-in closet.
59
00:03:14,252 --> 00:03:18,722
I mean, that's where my
purses and half my hair live.
60
00:03:18,723 --> 00:03:20,691
So purses and hair
61
00:03:20,692 --> 00:03:23,293
are doing better than old Caroline too?
62
00:03:23,294 --> 00:03:27,531
Uh, earwax is doing
better than old Caroline.
63
00:03:29,234 --> 00:03:30,834
Come on, Caroline.
64
00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:34,071
Let's shake these asses
and get them passes.
65
00:03:34,072 --> 00:03:35,839
Do you think I should shave my back
66
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,242
for tomorrow for Game Con?
67
00:03:38,243 --> 00:03:40,978
My mom does.
68
00:03:40,979 --> 00:03:42,679
Here are your fries.
69
00:03:42,680 --> 00:03:44,014
Ned, have you been working out?
70
00:03:45,884 --> 00:03:48,185
You know my name?
71
00:03:48,186 --> 00:03:49,753
Max, take your hand away.
72
00:03:49,754 --> 00:03:52,422
You'll kill him.
73
00:03:52,423 --> 00:03:56,026
Is there any way you can get
me into Game Con tomorrow?
74
00:03:56,027 --> 00:03:58,729
Oh! This is rich.
75
00:03:58,730 --> 00:04:00,964
The hot girls need something from the nerds
76
00:04:00,965 --> 00:04:05,301
like in science class
or any marriage in LA.
77
00:04:06,903 --> 00:04:09,406
I don't have any more tickets...
78
00:04:09,407 --> 00:04:12,709
or now a will to live.
79
00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:16,613
So... this is awkward.
80
00:04:16,614 --> 00:04:19,882
Well, puberty's a challenging time, Han.
81
00:04:28,661 --> 00:04:29,829
I did it!
82
00:04:29,830 --> 00:04:31,630
I got us in.
83
00:04:31,631 --> 00:04:34,366
Max, again, I feel like
the homeless shelter
84
00:04:34,367 --> 00:04:37,069
would be a step down for us.
85
00:04:37,070 --> 00:04:38,838
To Game Con.
86
00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:41,436
I got us jobs as booth babes!
87
00:04:42,442 --> 00:04:45,359
I'd rather go to the shelter.
88
00:04:46,012 --> 00:04:48,514
What are booth babes?
89
00:04:48,515 --> 00:04:50,749
We just have to wear these dresses,
90
00:04:50,750 --> 00:04:52,851
look hot, and hand out some flyers.
91
00:04:52,852 --> 00:04:57,022
Like a sexy Jehovah's Witness.
92
00:04:57,023 --> 00:04:59,958
Wearing that? Where's the top?
93
00:04:59,959 --> 00:05:01,794
- That is the top.
- Okay, where's the bottom?
94
00:05:01,795 --> 00:05:03,128
- You're looking at it.
- Where's the middle?
95
00:05:03,129 --> 00:05:04,396
- That's it.
- And the rest?
96
00:05:04,397 --> 00:05:07,666
Oh, right.
97
00:05:07,667 --> 00:05:10,903
Slutty boots!
98
00:05:10,904 --> 00:05:12,104
Are we really gonna show
99
00:05:12,105 --> 00:05:15,239
our vaginas for a gift bag?
100
00:05:17,209 --> 00:05:20,044
Yes, what else are they for?
101
00:05:21,747 --> 00:05:23,215
You heard Han.
102
00:05:23,216 --> 00:05:26,651
We could get a TV,
XBoxes, your precious iPad.
103
00:05:26,652 --> 00:05:28,820
At the very least, bottled water.
104
00:05:30,890 --> 00:05:34,626
It's just so degrading to
parade around in short skirts
105
00:05:34,627 --> 00:05:36,294
and be fake nice to nerds and...
106
00:05:36,295 --> 00:05:40,198
oh, my God, that's what we do at the diner.
107
00:05:40,199 --> 00:05:43,100
Hey, girls.
108
00:05:45,804 --> 00:05:48,073
We had to fire our contractor.
109
00:05:48,074 --> 00:05:50,141
Yeah, it's just taking too long.
110
00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:53,410
It's like having sex with a guy on Prozac.
111
00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:58,950
Been there.
112
00:05:58,951 --> 00:06:01,673
And I'm still waiting.
113
00:06:02,788 --> 00:06:04,656
So we hired my cousin.
114
00:06:04,657 --> 00:06:07,925
She and I have become close
since we stopped dating.
115
00:06:09,827 --> 00:06:11,729
I mean, we were going to stay at a hotel,
116
00:06:11,730 --> 00:06:15,532
but why do that when we
can stay with friends?
117
00:06:16,234 --> 00:06:19,203
Friends? What friends?
118
00:06:19,204 --> 00:06:22,539
Not you, Caroline. Max.
119
00:06:27,311 --> 00:06:29,447
I can't believe what I'm wearing.
120
00:06:29,448 --> 00:06:34,519
This dress sets women back
further than HBO's "Ballers."
121
00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:39,190
Well, I think it's nice to be
paid to put on clothes for once.
122
00:06:39,191 --> 00:06:40,725
"Ant Thrax"?
123
00:06:40,726 --> 00:06:42,226
Oops.
124
00:06:42,227 --> 00:06:43,427
You'll have to get it.
125
00:06:43,428 --> 00:06:44,595
I can't bend over any further
126
00:06:44,596 --> 00:06:47,798
or everyone will see my PlayStation.
127
00:06:50,769 --> 00:06:55,039
Did a very slow earthquake
just hit this booth?
128
00:06:56,174 --> 00:06:58,075
Hi. Is this, like, a real dance,
129
00:06:58,076 --> 00:07:00,211
or should I go get help?
130
00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:03,547
They're not having seizures.
131
00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:06,317
I think we're supposed to dance like that.
132
00:07:17,194 --> 00:07:19,997
Max? Caroline?
133
00:07:19,998 --> 00:07:22,433
Even though you just saw us doing that,
134
00:07:22,434 --> 00:07:25,836
we are still so much cooler than you.
135
00:07:25,837 --> 00:07:29,206
Yes, but the gap's getting smaller.
136
00:07:29,207 --> 00:07:30,874
How did you two get in here?
137
00:07:30,875 --> 00:07:32,910
A continuing series of bad decisions.
138
00:07:32,911 --> 00:07:35,212
You wouldn't help us,
139
00:07:35,213 --> 00:07:37,414
so we decided to be booth babes.
140
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,082
The most recent in the continuing series
141
00:07:39,083 --> 00:07:41,718
of those bad decisions.
142
00:07:41,719 --> 00:07:45,055
Max, Caroline, I'd like
you to meet my gamer crew.
143
00:07:45,056 --> 00:07:48,357
Basically, my Han-tourage.
144
00:07:50,861 --> 00:07:54,797
You were right, this thing
was sponsored by Virgin.
145
00:07:55,866 --> 00:07:57,534
If you guys are here,
146
00:07:57,535 --> 00:08:00,270
who's watching your
grandmother's basements?
147
00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:03,740
And this is my plus-on, Eunice.
148
00:08:03,741 --> 00:08:07,042
AKA Super Nintend-Ho.
149
00:08:08,211 --> 00:08:10,247
We never met till today.
150
00:08:10,248 --> 00:08:11,781
Isn't he the cutest?
151
00:08:11,782 --> 00:08:13,583
He saved me from a burning village,
152
00:08:13,584 --> 00:08:15,185
and then he asked me to marry him.
153
00:08:15,186 --> 00:08:18,255
Actually, my avatar asked
154
00:08:18,256 --> 00:08:20,757
her avatar to get married...
155
00:08:20,758 --> 00:08:23,393
in the game.
156
00:08:23,394 --> 00:08:25,328
Congratulations.
157
00:08:25,329 --> 00:08:27,464
That's not sad.
158
00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:29,733
I'm gonna go get my Pixel Pie a drink.
159
00:08:29,734 --> 00:08:31,267
It's the least I can do for the man
160
00:08:31,268 --> 00:08:33,503
who pulled me from a roaring inferno.
161
00:08:35,105 --> 00:08:37,106
Hurry back!
162
00:08:37,107 --> 00:08:40,810
I should have let her burn!
163
00:08:40,811 --> 00:08:42,512
Are you kidding?
164
00:08:42,513 --> 00:08:44,113
She's your type:
165
00:08:44,114 --> 00:08:46,215
willing.
166
00:08:46,216 --> 00:08:48,484
But I can't be tied down.
167
00:08:48,485 --> 00:08:49,953
Between this VIP pass
168
00:08:49,954 --> 00:08:52,155
and my suite at the Holiday Inn Express,
169
00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:56,225
I could be the Don Juan of Game Con.
170
00:08:56,226 --> 00:08:58,795
She's coming!
171
00:08:58,796 --> 00:09:01,731
Oh, where's Han Solo going?
172
00:09:01,732 --> 00:09:04,767
Uh... the Pokémon
booth started a flash mob
173
00:09:04,768 --> 00:09:07,737
and they needed a Pikachu.
174
00:09:07,738 --> 00:09:10,438
Death Bitch!
175
00:09:14,377 --> 00:09:16,612
I knew you seemed familiar.
176
00:09:16,613 --> 00:09:19,348
You look like that new
character, Death Bitch.
177
00:09:19,349 --> 00:09:20,950
Your booth is right over there.
178
00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:22,985
It's the most popular video game here...
179
00:09:22,986 --> 00:09:26,287
after "Girlfriend Simulator."
180
00:09:31,060 --> 00:09:34,296
Oh, my God, Max.
181
00:09:34,297 --> 00:09:36,198
Look.
182
00:09:36,199 --> 00:09:40,336
Han's gamer friend nerd
is carrying you away.
183
00:09:40,337 --> 00:09:43,072
And I do not like where he has his hand.
184
00:09:43,073 --> 00:09:44,540
Ned, stop!
185
00:09:44,541 --> 00:09:45,641
Yeah.
186
00:09:45,642 --> 00:09:49,311
At least buy me drink first.
187
00:09:49,312 --> 00:09:52,580
I'm just gonna put this down.
188
00:09:53,515 --> 00:09:55,651
Ned, this is your game?
189
00:09:55,652 --> 00:09:59,488
You turned Max into
some kind of Boobarella.
190
00:09:59,489 --> 00:10:01,824
I'm sorry, you weren't
supposed to see this yet.
191
00:10:01,825 --> 00:10:05,027
I was going to invite you to
the official release party.
192
00:10:05,028 --> 00:10:06,862
If this guy's having a release party,
193
00:10:06,863 --> 00:10:09,697
it's probably into an old sock.
194
00:10:17,765 --> 00:10:19,367
By the way, I'm taking this.
195
00:10:19,368 --> 00:10:22,703
I need someone to cover my
shift at the diner tomorrow.
196
00:10:22,704 --> 00:10:24,338
I don't think you'll
need to work at the diner
197
00:10:24,339 --> 00:10:28,409
after you're compensated for
Ned stealing your likeness.
198
00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:31,245
My mom said it was fine.
199
00:10:31,246 --> 00:10:33,280
I can get money for this?
200
00:10:33,281 --> 00:10:34,354
Because I'm pretty sure
201
00:10:34,355 --> 00:10:37,589
"Grand Theft Auto" is based
on how I got to New York.
202
00:10:38,487 --> 00:10:39,854
How you doing?
203
00:10:39,855 --> 00:10:42,423
Tony Shapiro, Rock N' Roll Games.
204
00:10:42,424 --> 00:10:45,725
Recently divorced.
205
00:10:46,827 --> 00:10:49,396
Tony, I don't think you bargained for
206
00:10:49,397 --> 00:10:51,865
a Wharton-educated booth babe...
207
00:10:51,866 --> 00:10:53,300
and neither did I.
208
00:10:53,301 --> 00:10:55,669
But your designer stole
my friend's likeness
209
00:10:55,670 --> 00:10:57,171
without her consent,
210
00:10:57,172 --> 00:10:59,206
so we're entitled to a
percentage of the profits.
211
00:10:59,207 --> 00:11:01,775
This illustration is not so
similar that it would hold up
212
00:11:01,776 --> 00:11:03,377
in a court of law.
213
00:11:03,378 --> 00:11:06,747
Oh, my God, Death Bitch.
214
00:11:06,748 --> 00:11:08,148
That's not her.
215
00:11:08,149 --> 00:11:09,516
The hell it's not.
216
00:11:09,517 --> 00:11:10,651
Look at her, dude.
217
00:11:10,652 --> 00:11:12,952
One, two.
218
00:11:14,721 --> 00:11:18,258
Look, it's clear you guys don't
have the money for a lawyer.
219
00:11:18,259 --> 00:11:20,193
That's true. Keep talking.
220
00:11:20,194 --> 00:11:21,562
But I get you want a payday,
221
00:11:21,563 --> 00:11:23,830
so I will pay your friend to play Amorta
222
00:11:23,831 --> 00:11:27,034
and take pictures with the fans
at our photo booth tomorrow.
223
00:11:27,035 --> 00:11:28,201
You're in luck.
224
00:11:28,202 --> 00:11:31,938
The model we hired died of an overdose.
225
00:11:31,939 --> 00:11:35,108
At least she died doing what I love.
226
00:11:35,109 --> 00:11:37,511
Tony, we may look like
we've settled in life,
227
00:11:37,512 --> 00:11:38,945
but we aren't gonna settle here.
228
00:11:38,946 --> 00:11:41,281
We stand to make millions
if we take you to court.
229
00:11:41,282 --> 00:11:43,783
- No, you don't.
- That's true, keep talking.
230
00:11:43,784 --> 00:11:45,652
What do you want?
231
00:11:45,653 --> 00:11:49,623
Throw in a free iPad and I'll
deliver her on-time and clean.
232
00:11:49,624 --> 00:11:52,491
You'll get me here on time.
233
00:12:08,174 --> 00:12:11,277
Um... what's happening here?
234
00:12:11,278 --> 00:12:15,048
Is this the foreplay or the cleanup?
235
00:12:15,049 --> 00:12:17,350
Sophie's using a PedEgg on my feet.
236
00:12:17,351 --> 00:12:21,154
And it tickles.
237
00:12:21,155 --> 00:12:23,556
Yeah, you know, if you go just one day
238
00:12:23,557 --> 00:12:25,425
without shaving calluses,
239
00:12:25,426 --> 00:12:28,094
you've already lost the war.
240
00:12:29,663 --> 00:12:32,165
Yeah, well, I'm sorry for the mess.
241
00:12:32,166 --> 00:12:36,569
Uh, I had to bring down
some basic necessities.
242
00:12:36,570 --> 00:12:41,907
Yeah, like... like plates
and cups and toilet paper.
243
00:12:46,913 --> 00:12:52,451
Wait, is that a TV and
an XBox in my apartment?
244
00:12:52,452 --> 00:12:54,153
I don't know what to do.
245
00:12:54,154 --> 00:12:56,088
I've been waiting for
this day my whole life,
246
00:12:56,089 --> 00:12:58,924
and now that it's hear I'm shy.
247
00:12:58,925 --> 00:13:01,327
Yeah, this is how we watch TV.
248
00:13:01,328 --> 00:13:05,131
We get Hulu, Netflix, YouTube...
249
00:13:05,132 --> 00:13:06,899
YouSpank...
250
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:09,635
SpankBank...
251
00:13:09,636 --> 00:13:12,872
PornOnTheCob.
252
00:13:12,873 --> 00:13:15,975
Can I pop in this sweet
demo game I got today?
253
00:13:15,976 --> 00:13:18,477
It's a hyper-sexualized,
violent version of me
254
00:13:18,478 --> 00:13:20,846
who kills everyone who gets in my way.
255
00:13:20,847 --> 00:13:23,148
It's a biopic, really.
256
00:13:23,149 --> 00:13:25,985
Stick it in and I'll watch you play.
257
00:13:27,887 --> 00:13:30,589
Gosh, if I had a nickel
every time Oleg said that...
258
00:13:30,590 --> 00:13:34,393
You'd be able to afford a hotel room?
259
00:13:34,394 --> 00:13:36,295
Okay, well, I'm gonna go in the other room,
260
00:13:36,296 --> 00:13:38,097
anywhere but here...
261
00:13:38,098 --> 00:13:41,432
which now smells like
patchouli and pierogis.
262
00:13:43,402 --> 00:13:47,272
Oh, we have a sex swing now.
263
00:13:47,273 --> 00:13:49,341
Welcome to Asrieth, Amorta.
264
00:13:49,342 --> 00:13:51,410
You must kill anything that moves.
265
00:13:51,411 --> 00:13:52,878
Go.
266
00:13:56,549 --> 00:13:59,851
This chick is my spirit animal.
267
00:13:59,852 --> 00:14:02,020
All she's doing is drinking from a flask
268
00:14:02,021 --> 00:14:04,356
and punching people in the face.
269
00:14:04,357 --> 00:14:06,925
Max, she's just like you.
270
00:14:08,594 --> 00:14:09,961
Yak Girl, come!
271
00:14:09,962 --> 00:14:12,063
I need you!
272
00:14:16,902 --> 00:14:19,971
What's that silly animal thing?
273
00:14:19,972 --> 00:14:21,306
Yak Girl.
274
00:14:21,307 --> 00:14:23,508
I think she's my sidekick.
275
00:14:23,509 --> 00:14:25,410
Hey.
276
00:14:25,411 --> 00:14:29,314
That thing looks just like Caroline.
277
00:14:29,315 --> 00:14:30,515
It does!
278
00:14:30,516 --> 00:14:33,151
It looks like Caroline!
279
00:14:33,152 --> 00:14:35,153
Why did I hear my name?
280
00:14:35,154 --> 00:14:39,157
Why am I seeing a horse
thing that has my face?
281
00:14:39,158 --> 00:14:41,459
Please, Caroline, it's not
a horse thing with your face.
282
00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:43,795
It's a yak thing with your face.
283
00:14:47,866 --> 00:14:49,133
That's the sound you make
284
00:14:49,134 --> 00:14:53,071
when you have to do side work at the diner.
285
00:14:53,072 --> 00:14:55,406
Yak Girl, come!
286
00:14:55,407 --> 00:14:58,076
Hey, look.
287
00:14:58,077 --> 00:15:01,245
Max, you're riding her.
288
00:15:01,246 --> 00:15:03,214
Oh!
289
00:15:03,215 --> 00:15:04,582
Oh, no, no way.
290
00:15:04,583 --> 00:15:07,051
I'm calling that Tony jerk right now.
291
00:15:07,052 --> 00:15:08,419
So what?
292
00:15:08,420 --> 00:15:10,221
She just lets Death Bitch ride her?
293
00:15:10,222 --> 00:15:11,956
That's all Yak Girl does?
294
00:15:11,957 --> 00:15:14,992
No, she poops when you hit this button.
295
00:15:19,798 --> 00:15:22,999
Ah, Caroline can't stop pooping!
296
00:15:24,101 --> 00:15:27,404
Just like that one time at the diner.
297
00:15:28,372 --> 00:15:30,374
Tony, this is Caroline Channing,
298
00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:32,243
AKA Yak Girl.
299
00:15:32,244 --> 00:15:34,445
I am taking you to court.
300
00:15:34,446 --> 00:15:37,948
That's true. Keep talking.
301
00:15:37,949 --> 00:15:39,483
That's your big offer?
302
00:15:39,484 --> 00:15:42,686
That I dress like that and
take pictures with nerds?
303
00:15:42,687 --> 00:15:45,089
Well, let me just say to you, sir,
304
00:15:45,090 --> 00:15:47,057
I will need an iPad, as well.
305
00:15:53,031 --> 00:15:56,399
Somebody better go out
and get that toilet paper.
306
00:16:08,095 --> 00:16:09,430
How long till Death Bitch?
307
00:16:09,431 --> 00:16:11,766
I have to go take my medication.
308
00:16:11,767 --> 00:16:15,101
What are you taking? You got any extra?
309
00:16:16,070 --> 00:16:17,471
Right this way.
310
00:16:17,472 --> 00:16:20,173
This is so exciting.
311
00:16:24,146 --> 00:16:25,913
This will be fun.
312
00:16:25,914 --> 00:16:29,116
I haven't been paid to be a
bitch since I worked at the DMV.
313
00:16:29,117 --> 00:16:31,051
Ooh, a green screen.
314
00:16:31,052 --> 00:16:32,887
Look, I'm on another planet.
315
00:16:32,888 --> 00:16:35,489
Finally got that vacation.
316
00:16:35,490 --> 00:16:38,858
Hey, Yak Girl, come on out. Time is money!
317
00:16:44,698 --> 00:16:46,467
You okay in there?
318
00:16:46,468 --> 00:16:50,736
This is what it must be like for
Kim Kardashian to enter a room.
319
00:16:51,605 --> 00:16:53,273
All right, it's pretty simple.
320
00:16:53,274 --> 00:16:54,575
One picture.
321
00:16:54,576 --> 00:16:55,809
And don't worry if you get a boner.
322
00:16:55,810 --> 00:16:58,044
We'll crop it out.
323
00:16:58,812 --> 00:17:01,548
Could I be any more humiliated?
324
00:17:01,549 --> 00:17:03,317
I just want a photo with her.
325
00:17:03,318 --> 00:17:05,118
Not you.
326
00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:06,787
I guess you could.
327
00:17:06,788 --> 00:17:10,190
Fine, I'm probably due for a poop, anyway.
328
00:17:11,426 --> 00:17:13,193
Aah!
329
00:17:13,194 --> 00:17:15,428
I'm okay!
330
00:17:16,530 --> 00:17:18,332
Can you chop my head off?
331
00:17:18,333 --> 00:17:21,567
It'll be the best head you'll ever get.
332
00:17:26,406 --> 00:17:28,542
All right, get out of here. I killed you.
333
00:17:28,543 --> 00:17:29,743
Hold on.
334
00:17:29,744 --> 00:17:31,812
Death Bitch, say your catchphrase.
335
00:17:31,813 --> 00:17:33,847
Remember: even in death,
336
00:17:33,848 --> 00:17:36,482
you're my bitch.
337
00:17:38,519 --> 00:17:40,153
I'm really liking this identity.
338
00:17:40,154 --> 00:17:42,988
It's better than the other 17 I've had.
339
00:17:44,090 --> 00:17:45,825
Nobody wants to take a photo with me.
340
00:17:45,826 --> 00:17:49,195
I mean, baby got yak, right, Max?
341
00:17:49,196 --> 00:17:51,131
Will you just let me enjoy this?
342
00:17:51,132 --> 00:17:53,066
This is a dream come true for me.
343
00:17:53,067 --> 00:17:54,367
I'm at a game convention.
344
00:17:54,368 --> 00:17:56,069
I'm the star of a video game.
345
00:17:56,070 --> 00:17:58,037
I can kill without consequences.
346
00:17:58,038 --> 00:18:00,140
I'm pretty much peaking right now.
347
00:18:00,141 --> 00:18:01,808
Yeah, well, I have hooves.
348
00:18:01,809 --> 00:18:04,776
Can I just be upset for one minute?
349
00:18:06,679 --> 00:18:08,681
Max, hide me.
350
00:18:08,682 --> 00:18:11,684
Looks like you're doing a
pretty good job of that yourself.
351
00:18:11,685 --> 00:18:13,853
Aah!
352
00:18:13,854 --> 00:18:15,255
Seriously, help.
353
00:18:15,256 --> 00:18:17,290
Get back here, Han Solo!
354
00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:19,859
You promised we'd build our lives together.
355
00:18:19,860 --> 00:18:23,596
We shared that Hot Pocket
"Lady in the Tramp" style.
356
00:18:23,597 --> 00:18:24,931
Uh, miss?
357
00:18:24,932 --> 00:18:26,532
There's gotta be better people out there.
358
00:18:26,533 --> 00:18:29,669
Have you tried literally anyone else?
359
00:18:29,670 --> 00:18:33,940
I convinced my sister to
sign me out for this weekend,
360
00:18:33,941 --> 00:18:37,443
so you are not gonna stop
me from seeing my Han.
361
00:18:37,444 --> 00:18:41,314
Back off, Amorta!
362
00:18:41,315 --> 00:18:43,282
Uh, Han, you're on your own.
363
00:18:43,283 --> 00:18:45,084
I can't ruin this costume.
364
00:18:45,085 --> 00:18:48,287
I'm gonna need it the next time
I have to get out of jury duty.
365
00:18:48,288 --> 00:18:49,455
Oh, no, I'm a goner.
366
00:18:49,456 --> 00:18:51,023
She's gonna eat me alive.
367
00:18:51,024 --> 00:18:53,342
You should have seen her go
to town on that Hot Pocket.
368
00:18:53,343 --> 00:18:55,127
Out of the way, Han. I'll show you all
369
00:18:55,128 --> 00:18:57,862
I can do more than just poop.
370
00:18:59,165 --> 00:19:01,400
Oh.
371
00:19:06,505 --> 00:19:07,940
Uh, Yak Girl?
372
00:19:07,941 --> 00:19:11,242
Your heinie quarters are showing.
373
00:19:12,411 --> 00:19:14,079
Got it.
374
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:18,015
This is gonna make the girl
I'm catfishing real jealous.
375
00:19:29,128 --> 00:19:30,162
Hey, Earl.
376
00:19:30,163 --> 00:19:32,831
Hey, Caroline. Hey, Max.
377
00:19:32,832 --> 00:19:35,132
Hey, Max.
378
00:19:37,302 --> 00:19:39,771
Hi, Max. Hey.
379
00:19:39,772 --> 00:19:41,240
Look at that.
380
00:19:41,241 --> 00:19:44,542
I have the exact same antlers.
381
00:19:45,510 --> 00:19:46,878
That's not me.
382
00:19:46,879 --> 00:19:49,648
You can tell by how fast she's moving.
383
00:19:49,649 --> 00:19:52,250
Know what's not moving fast?
384
00:19:52,251 --> 00:19:53,986
Our construction.
385
00:19:53,987 --> 00:19:56,822
Yeah, we had to fire Oleg's cousin.
386
00:19:56,823 --> 00:20:00,459
Turns out the sexual
tension was still there.
387
00:20:00,460 --> 00:20:03,528
Hey body... not so much.
388
00:20:03,529 --> 00:20:06,164
Yeah, so it's gonna take
at least another week.
389
00:20:06,165 --> 00:20:07,899
A week?
390
00:20:07,900 --> 00:20:12,136
There goes the "no sex while
Max and Caroline are awake" rule.
391
00:20:13,371 --> 00:20:17,641
That wasn't sex you were
having in front of us?
392
00:20:19,044 --> 00:20:20,478
Max, Caroline,
393
00:20:20,479 --> 00:20:22,314
I don't know how I'll ever repay you
394
00:20:22,315 --> 00:20:24,049
for getting Eunice off my back.
395
00:20:24,050 --> 00:20:25,717
I do.
396
00:20:25,718 --> 00:20:29,820
Sophie and Oleg are staying
at your place for a week.
397
00:20:32,157 --> 00:20:37,162
I was thinking an extra baked
potato with your shift meal.
398
00:20:37,163 --> 00:20:38,663
Yeah, Han, um...
399
00:20:38,664 --> 00:20:42,466
how much bouncing can your bed take?
400
00:20:44,102 --> 00:20:46,337
You're killing me, Max.
401
00:20:46,338 --> 00:20:48,373
Yep, even in death,
402
00:20:48,374 --> 00:20:50,807
you're my bitch.
403
00:20:55,622 --> 00:21:02,972
Subtitle sync and corrections
by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.