1
00:00:48,036 --> 00:00:50,311
Citizens of Metrocity,

2
00:00:50,476 --> 00:00:54,515
long have I waited
to give you your just desserts.

3
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Prepare to face
the unbridled wrath of...

4
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...my fantastic bargains!

5
00:01:01,556 --> 00:01:05,071
Welcome, welcome,
citizens of Metrocity,

6
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to the Evil Lair Yard Sale.

7
00:01:07,596 --> 00:01:11,350
As you know, this is my first day
as defender of Metrocity,

8
00:01:11,516 --> 00:01:16,032
and now that I'm no longer evil,
I no longer need things that do evil.

9
00:01:16,516 --> 00:01:20,350
- A Terror Teddy, awesome.
- Excellent choice.

10
00:01:20,516 --> 00:01:22,984
Now, let the browsing commence.

11
00:01:23,156 --> 00:01:26,466
Minion, we're going
to need more petty cash.

12
00:01:27,236 --> 00:01:30,194
- What's behind there, Minion?
- Nothing.

13
00:01:30,596 --> 00:01:32,746
- I knew it.
- Please, please, please.

14
00:01:32,916 --> 00:01:34,668
Can't we just keep the spider-bot?

15
00:01:34,836 --> 00:01:39,034
Minion, heroes don't drive around
in creepy spee-ider-bots.

16
00:01:39,196 --> 00:01:41,346
See? Now you've hurt its feelings.

17
00:01:41,516 --> 00:01:43,154
Spider-bot, come here.

18
00:01:43,916 --> 00:01:46,555
Damien, we do not play with laser guns.

19
00:01:46,716 --> 00:01:48,946
- Come on, Mom.
- Put it back this instant.

20
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Madame, he's merely expressing himself.

21
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Besides, it's not a laser gun.
It's a dehydration...

22
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...gun.

23
00:02:01,116 --> 00:02:04,188
Just soak her in some water,
not the toilet. She'll be fine.

24
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- That is so cool.
- Yes.

25
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Free doughnuts with every
billion-dollar purchase.

26
00:02:08,876 --> 00:02:12,471
Piece of junk? This satellite death ray
goes up to 900 million volts,

27
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and has its own GPS.

28
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Let me handle this, Minion.
For insurance purposes,

29
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I have to tell you to only use it
for barbecuing, not for evil.

30
00:02:23,116 --> 00:02:26,313
- I don't like barbecues.
- "I don't like barbecues."

31
00:02:26,476 --> 00:02:28,387
Shall we start the bidding?

32
00:02:28,556 --> 00:02:31,946
Bootwheel of death.
Sold to the soccer mom!

33
00:02:32,116 --> 00:02:34,266
Can I get seven for the flamethrower?

34
00:02:34,436 --> 00:02:37,030
Sold to the chef.
Excellent for crème brulée.

35
00:02:37,196 --> 00:02:39,312
Do I hear ten bucks
for the disguise generator?

36
00:02:39,476 --> 00:02:41,546
Sold to the woman
with the beautiful moustache.

37
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Sold to you, sir. Sold.
Sold. Sold.

38
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Sold.

39
00:02:46,796 --> 00:02:50,471
Fantastic.
The place is already looking less evil.

40
00:02:50,636 --> 00:02:54,026
Sir, now that we've gotten rid
of all your "evil things",

41
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how are we going to protect Metro City?

42
00:02:56,156 --> 00:02:58,511
Way ahead of you, Minion.

43
00:03:01,156 --> 00:03:02,509
What are you wearing?

44
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My new super-secret,
superhero super-suit.

45
00:03:05,676 --> 00:03:08,907
I designed it myself,
to copy all of Metro Man's powers:

46
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Super-boots, super-strength,

47
00:03:11,716 --> 00:03:15,470
and super-X-ray-slash-laser vision.

48
00:03:17,036 --> 00:03:20,392
Yeah, I'm not sure
if it's really... you.

49
00:03:20,556 --> 00:03:23,628
Au contraire, filet Minion.

50
00:03:23,796 --> 00:03:27,072
This is perfect for when we go
on our first patrol of the city.

51
00:03:27,236 --> 00:03:30,148
- What's that?
- It's the only thing I couldn't sell,

52
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other than the death ray.
Just a box with a button on it.

53
00:03:33,916 --> 00:03:37,465
- I don't even remember what it does.
- But it must do something.

54
00:03:37,636 --> 00:03:39,149
Maybe it opens the ja-rage door.

55
00:03:43,956 --> 00:03:45,628
Oh, dear.

56
00:03:47,556 --> 00:03:48,955
Greetings, hero.

57
00:03:49,116 --> 00:03:52,745
You've just unleashed
an unspeakable evil upon Metrocity,

58
00:03:52,916 --> 00:03:55,908
and you're really,
really not going to like it.

59
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:05,273
- Where did it go?
- I don't know.

60
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Unspeakable evil, activated.

61
00:04:13,596 --> 00:04:15,712
Sir, what was the unspeakable evil?

62
00:04:15,876 --> 00:04:18,265
I've had a lot of evil plans
over the years.

63
00:04:18,436 --> 00:04:20,427
- You forgot.
- You should've catalogued them

64
00:04:20,596 --> 00:04:21,870
- so I wouldn't have to remember.
- What?!

65
00:04:22,036 --> 00:04:25,312
- This is actually your fault.
- My fault? How is this my fault?

66
00:04:25,476 --> 00:04:26,989
I'm thinking. It could be anything.

67
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- Remember the Forget-Me Bomb?
- Yes! No.

68
00:04:29,876 --> 00:04:32,106
What about
the Encyclopaedia A-bomb-ica?

69
00:04:32,276 --> 00:04:33,994
Rock 'Em, Sock 'Em Kittens.

70
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They were as cute as they were deadly.

71
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- The Destructosaur.
- Wait.

72
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It's something beginning with M.

73
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M, that really narrows it down.

74
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Don't move.
I think I remembered what it is.

75
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It's my favourite!

76
00:04:54,396 --> 00:04:57,866
- It's the Mega-Megamind.
- Ollo!

77
00:04:58,036 --> 00:05:01,153
I transferred my evil personality
into a giant ra-bot.

78
00:05:01,316 --> 00:05:03,784
- Man, I do good work.
- Really terrific stuff,

79
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but we should probably turn it off.

80
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White suit, white cape,

81
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if it isn't my old friend, Metro Man.

82
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- He thinks you're Metro Man.
- Well, I am defender of Metrocity now.

83
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This is the perfect time for me
to debut my super-suit.

84
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Activate super-strength.

85
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Gross.
I just stepped in a pile of hero.

86
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Activate super-boots.

87
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Sir!

88
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Olé!

89
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Right. I forgot about that.

90
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Help!

91
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Time out.

92
00:05:54,196 --> 00:05:55,151
Oh, no!

93
00:05:56,436 --> 00:05:58,552
Activate super-laser vision.

94
00:06:07,076 --> 00:06:08,873
Where... Where is he?

95
00:06:11,436 --> 00:06:12,789
Sir?

96
00:06:13,796 --> 00:06:18,074
- Sir, are you in the invisible car?
- No.

97
00:06:18,236 --> 00:06:19,715
Are you a chicken?

98
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Get in.

99
00:06:24,916 --> 00:06:26,144
We're in trouble, Minion.

100
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I programmed it to never stop
until it eliminated the hero.

101
00:06:31,916 --> 00:06:33,872
It's out there, searching for me.

102
00:06:34,036 --> 00:06:35,754
Where are you, hero?

103
00:06:35,916 --> 00:06:37,395
Is it searching for me, too?

104
00:06:37,556 --> 00:06:39,592
And your mysterious friend,

105
00:06:39,756 --> 00:06:42,714
who's dressed up as Minion
for some reason.

106
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But don't worry,
we can live in here from now on.

107
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- The brain-bots can bring us snacks.
- Sir, that is crazy.

108
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We're gonna have
to face this thing eventually.

109
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Did you miss what happened out there?
The new me is an utter failure.

110
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- Well, it's clear you're no Metro Man.
- I know I'm not Metro Man.

111
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I just mean, maybe you should stop
trying to be him and just be you.

112
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Really? Is that possible?

113
00:07:09,836 --> 00:07:14,705
- But I sold all my evil stuff.
- Well... not everything.

114
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Spee-ider-bot. I don't understand.
I thought everything was gone.

115
00:07:20,436 --> 00:07:22,666
I just couldn't part
with our spider-bot, sir.

116
00:07:22,836 --> 00:07:26,954
I was thinking maybe we could
still use him to patrol heroically.

117
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Minion, you sentimental simian, you.

118
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Now, I just need a plan.

119
00:07:35,196 --> 00:07:39,314
- Wait a minute! Boingo!
- I think you mean "bingo", sir.

120
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That's what I said. Boingo!

121
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Anyone home?
Come out so I can squish you.

122
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Hey, beta box.

123
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Ready for round two, hero?

124
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Are you in the mood
for a slice of hero pie?

125
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Only if it comes à la explode.

126
00:08:11,476 --> 00:08:12,829
Where'd you go?

127
00:08:14,236 --> 00:08:17,194
Do you feel the taunting power
of my eyebrow?

128
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How dare you brow me!

129
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Oh, yes!

130
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Missed again.

131
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That's right, metal face,
follow me to your doom.

132
00:08:40,236 --> 00:08:43,945
OK, Minion, ready the death ray.

133
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Yes, sir.

134
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Prepare to meet your maker:

135
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Me.

136
00:08:55,636 --> 00:08:57,866
Say bye-bye, Metro Man.

137
00:08:58,036 --> 00:08:59,230
Fire, Minion.

138
00:09:00,116 --> 00:09:01,708
Minion, fire.

139
00:09:02,196 --> 00:09:05,347
- Slight problem here, sir.
- Slight problem? How slight?

140
00:09:05,516 --> 00:09:08,110
Your super-suit
smashed the death ray controls.

141
00:09:10,796 --> 00:09:13,708
What the...? Lmpossible.

142
00:09:14,476 --> 00:09:17,229
- Minion, find the remote.
- Oh, right.

143
00:09:17,796 --> 00:09:20,515
You know, we should really mark these.
Do you remember what it looked like?

144
00:09:20,676 --> 00:09:24,385
No, I don't remember
what it looked like. Try the...

145
00:09:24,556 --> 00:09:25,909
Well, it's not that one.

146
00:09:26,756 --> 00:09:30,032
- Minion, turn it off.
- Peekaboo!

147
00:09:32,516 --> 00:09:34,950
You can crawl, but you can't hide.

148
00:09:35,116 --> 00:09:37,710
What about this one?

149
00:09:37,876 --> 00:09:39,673
No. No.

150
00:09:39,836 --> 00:09:42,031
Talk about a crushing defeat.

151
00:09:42,196 --> 00:09:44,756
The old evil me is so annoying.

152
00:09:47,636 --> 00:09:49,149
Hurry, Minion!

153
00:09:51,116 --> 00:09:52,834
I can't keep this up!

154
00:09:56,956 --> 00:09:59,151
Minion! What are you doing?

155
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:01,074
I've got it, sir.

156
00:10:05,756 --> 00:10:08,714
OK, Minion, on my marco.

157
00:10:08,876 --> 00:10:10,707
I hate spee-iders.

158
00:10:12,276 --> 00:10:13,265
Marco!

159
00:10:14,516 --> 00:10:16,108
Polo!

160
00:10:18,036 --> 00:10:19,310
Oh, no!

161
00:10:26,596 --> 00:10:29,064
Goodbye, old me.

162
00:10:32,036 --> 00:10:34,504
We did it! We did it!

163
00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:36,667
Yes, we did, Minion.

164
00:10:36,836 --> 00:10:40,749
Now, let's go get the rest
of our evil stuff back.

165
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- No more school!
- We're free!

166
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No parents!

167
00:10:53,276 --> 00:10:56,188
- Booger.
- With our parents dehydrated,

168
00:10:56,356 --> 00:11:00,588
we can rule Metro City. Yes!

169
00:11:01,476 --> 00:11:04,274
Not today or any other day,

170
00:11:04,436 --> 00:11:06,506
my sugar-fuelled friend.

171
00:11:06,676 --> 00:11:09,986
- Oh, my goodness.
- I'll take that, thank you very much.

172
00:11:10,156 --> 00:11:12,624
I'd normally cart your heinies downtown,

173
00:11:12,796 --> 00:11:17,950
but I have a feeling your parents will
offer you a far more severe punishment.

174
00:11:18,116 --> 00:11:20,914
A glass of water, Minion, if you please.

175
00:11:22,036 --> 00:11:24,106
No!

176
00:11:27,236 --> 00:11:30,626
Well, sir, the weapons of justice
are back where they belong.

177
00:11:30,796 --> 00:11:33,026
Let's just hope the city
is ready for me.

178
00:11:33,196 --> 00:11:36,347
- I'd say it is, sir.
- Look.

179
00:11:37,556 --> 00:11:39,148
They made me my own signal.

180
00:11:39,316 --> 00:11:42,706
Us. They made us our own signal.

181
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:46,469
Pull yourself together, Minion!
Now, make a note.

182
00:11:46,636 --> 00:11:48,513
- It needs to be a lot bigger.
- Yes, sir.

183
00:11:48,676 --> 00:11:51,236
Let's go patrol, heroically.

184
00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:01,911
Oh, what fun!

185
00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:16,386
THE END
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ENGLISH ESL