1 00:00:06,037 --> 00:00:08,239 ZURI: Come on, come on, come on! 2 00:00:08,239 --> 00:00:11,612 Jessie! Do something about this. 3 00:00:11,612 --> 00:00:14,615 Zuri, Bertram is a butler, not a ride. 4 00:00:14,615 --> 00:00:17,248 You're telling me. 5 00:00:17,248 --> 00:00:18,749 Spin! Spin! Spin! 6 00:00:20,591 --> 00:00:22,353 Nothin'. 7 00:00:22,353 --> 00:00:23,624 Come here. Oh! 8 00:00:26,397 --> 00:00:28,599 I think someone needs to go to the park. 9 00:00:28,599 --> 00:00:30,801 I think someone needs to be declawed. 10 00:00:32,403 --> 00:00:34,335 You can't prove that's mine. 11 00:00:35,466 --> 00:00:36,737 (SCREAMING) 12 00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:39,340 I hate you! I hate you more! 13 00:00:41,312 --> 00:00:43,414 Ooh, like roses are gonna hurt me! 14 00:00:44,345 --> 00:00:45,546 Ow! Thorns! 15 00:00:46,617 --> 00:00:48,379 Hey! Hey! 16 00:00:48,379 --> 00:00:51,622 Come here. Come here. Get off him! 17 00:00:51,622 --> 00:00:53,053 What's happening? 18 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:56,187 I do not know! I thought we were just playing tag! 19 00:00:58,159 --> 00:00:58,759 I wonder if I can stay like this till they go off to college. 20 00:01:01,832 --> 00:01:05,065 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh 21 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:08,569 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 22 00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:12,503 ♪ It feels like a party every day 23 00:01:12,503 --> 00:01:15,776 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 24 00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:18,679 ♪ But they keep on pulling me every which way 25 00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:22,813 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 26 00:01:22,813 --> 00:01:26,457 ♪ My whole world is changing Turning around 27 00:01:26,457 --> 00:01:30,321 ♪ They got me going crazy Yeah, they're shaking the ground 28 00:01:30,321 --> 00:01:33,364 ♪ But they took a chance on the new girl in town 29 00:01:33,364 --> 00:01:37,368 ♪ And I don't want to let them down, down, down 30 00:01:37,368 --> 00:01:38,229 ♪ Hey Jessie 31 00:01:40,731 --> 00:01:40,871 ♪ Hey Jessie 32 00:01:44,435 --> 00:01:48,239 ♪ It feels like a party every day 33 00:01:48,239 --> 00:01:50,811 ♪ Hey, hey, hey hey, hey, Jessie ♪ 34 00:01:57,348 --> 00:02:01,292 Okay, my arms are getting tired and my deodorant's giving out! 35 00:02:01,292 --> 00:02:02,253 I can confirm that. 36 00:02:04,495 --> 00:02:06,657 So knock it off! 37 00:02:06,657 --> 00:02:09,560 Luke took my computer and I need it to write my social studies report! 38 00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:10,801 Well, I needed to play a video game, 39 00:02:10,801 --> 00:02:12,733 and my computer fell in the toilet! 40 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:15,166 Again? Why can't you just read a magazine in there like everyone else? 41 00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:19,410 Luke, you are grounded. 42 00:02:19,410 --> 00:02:21,442 Emma, go write your report. 43 00:02:21,442 --> 00:02:23,774 I can't until I go to the multicultural fair in Battery Park. 44 00:02:23,774 --> 00:02:25,816 Oh, yeah? Is this like that time 45 00:02:25,816 --> 00:02:26,847 you had to ride the roller coaster at Coney Island 46 00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:29,720 for your physics report? 47 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:31,522 No, and I can't believe you bought that. 48 00:02:34,285 --> 00:02:37,588 I have to do a photo essay on the different ethnic groups in New York. 49 00:02:37,588 --> 00:02:39,690 B-T-Dubbs, the fair ends in three hours, 50 00:02:39,690 --> 00:02:41,492 and my report is due tomorrow. 51 00:02:41,492 --> 00:02:43,934 What? I cannot believe you waited until the last minute again! 52 00:02:43,934 --> 00:02:46,197 Social Studies is hard! 53 00:02:46,197 --> 00:02:49,370 When I first signed up, I thought it would be mostly social, 54 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,702 but it turns out to be mostly studies. 55 00:02:51,702 --> 00:02:54,745 You have got to learn to manage your time better, 56 00:02:54,745 --> 00:02:57,848 be more responsible, show some initiative. 57 00:02:57,848 --> 00:03:00,951 OMG! I'm turning into my dad! 58 00:03:00,951 --> 00:03:02,883 All I need is a crewcut, and a strange desire 59 00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:05,916 to have people punch me in the stomach. 60 00:03:05,916 --> 00:03:08,359 Can we talk about your weird family in the cab? 61 00:03:08,359 --> 00:03:10,461 Oh, no. A cab will take forever. 62 00:03:10,461 --> 00:03:12,493 Here. We'll take the subway and get there lickity split! 63 00:03:13,864 --> 00:03:15,596 Did you just say, "The subway"? 64 00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:19,670 And did you just say, "Lickity-split"? 65 00:03:20,531 --> 00:03:23,674 Affirmative. Now grab your stuff 66 00:03:23,674 --> 00:03:26,206 and move, move, move, you miserable maggots! 67 00:03:28,239 --> 00:03:30,441 Did your drill sergeant father also say that? 68 00:03:30,441 --> 00:03:31,612 Oh, no, that was my grandma. 69 00:03:31,612 --> 00:03:33,344 Best crossing guard our town ever had. 70 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:41,352 (POP MUSIC PLAYING) 71 00:03:57,668 --> 00:03:59,270 (SCREAMING) 72 00:03:59,270 --> 00:04:01,712 Bertram! What's wrong? What is it? 73 00:04:01,712 --> 00:04:03,974 (STUTTERING) Sp... 74 00:04:03,974 --> 00:04:05,546 Spit it out, Bertram! 75 00:04:05,546 --> 00:04:06,747 Spider! 76 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:10,351 Oh, hey. 77 00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:18,389 (CHUCKLES) That was totally worth coming in for. 78 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:32,573 Why don't you just wear a sign that says "mug me"? 79 00:04:32,573 --> 00:04:34,405 Because that would be dangerous. Would it not? 80 00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:40,451 Ew! I hate the subway. 81 00:04:40,451 --> 00:04:42,052 It smells like the inside of a camel. 82 00:04:43,354 --> 00:04:44,555 Oh, it's not that bad. 83 00:04:45,556 --> 00:04:48,919 It helps if you breathe through your mouth. 84 00:04:48,919 --> 00:04:52,323 Meanwhile, the fair closes in two and a half hours. 85 00:04:52,323 --> 00:04:53,864 Uh, we will make it, 86 00:04:53,864 --> 00:04:55,496 and we'll have plenty of time left over 87 00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:56,797 for Zuri to play in Battery Park, 88 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:59,670 and for Ravi to visit the Statue of Liberty. 89 00:04:59,670 --> 00:05:04,034 I have always wanted to meet Lady Liberty. 90 00:05:04,034 --> 00:05:06,306 She is my third favorite green person, 91 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,679 behind Oscar the Grouch and the Hulk. 92 00:05:08,679 --> 00:05:09,580 (GROWLS) 93 00:05:15,686 --> 00:05:18,919 Okay. Now remember, be polite to your fellow passengers. 94 00:05:23,424 --> 00:05:26,357 Now I know how my crayons feel when I cram them into the box. 95 00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:32,733 This is the monster we're dealing with. 96 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:35,065 See the oval pattern on its back? 97 00:05:35,065 --> 00:05:38,809 That's the trademark of the speckled recluse, 98 00:05:38,809 --> 00:05:44,044 the deadliest spider on the planet. 99 00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:46,577 "If you've been bitten by the speckled recluse, 100 00:05:46,577 --> 00:05:48,118 "first you start to itch, 101 00:05:48,118 --> 00:05:50,581 "then you start to sweat, 102 00:05:51,622 --> 00:05:54,054 "and after you've been bitten, 103 00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:56,927 "the deadly venom floods your system, 104 00:05:56,927 --> 00:05:59,059 "and you look like this!" 105 00:05:59,059 --> 00:06:00,691 Oh! It's hideous! 106 00:06:00,691 --> 00:06:03,634 The bulging eyes, the hairy legs, 107 00:06:03,634 --> 00:06:05,796 the purple distended veins! 108 00:06:05,796 --> 00:06:08,098 Oops, that's my Aunt Shirley at the water park. 109 00:06:24,855 --> 00:06:26,156 (SCISSORS SNIPPING) 110 00:06:33,964 --> 00:06:37,768 Sorry. Excuse me. Excuse me. Forgive me. 111 00:06:38,769 --> 00:06:40,170 (MAN ANNOUNCES ON PA) 112 00:06:40,170 --> 00:06:42,473 What did he say? 113 00:06:42,473 --> 00:06:45,405 He said... (IMITATES ANNOUNCER) 114 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:47,808 Which means next stop, Battery Park. 115 00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:51,181 Good, because I'm itching to go to the playground. 116 00:06:51,181 --> 00:06:53,784 Or maybe it's just this guy's hair down my back. 117 00:06:57,448 --> 00:06:59,720 Okay, I don't know which was more hideous, 118 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:04,024 that guy dropping hair all over me, or Granny Gaga! 119 00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:06,797 At least you were not sitting at butt level. 120 00:07:06,797 --> 00:07:10,060 I was right in the line of fire. 121 00:07:10,060 --> 00:07:13,904 Okay. Anyway, here we are. Battery Park. 122 00:07:13,904 --> 00:07:16,837 No, we're up at 168th Street. 123 00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:18,168 Washington Heights! 124 00:07:18,168 --> 00:07:18,739 Uh-oh. 125 00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:22,112 Instead of going downtown, we went uptown! 126 00:07:22,112 --> 00:07:24,815 Oh, great, we're halfway to the North Pole! 127 00:07:24,815 --> 00:07:27,177 I'll have to write my report on Santa and his elves. 128 00:07:27,778 --> 00:07:29,580 Really? 129 00:07:29,580 --> 00:07:31,021 No, Zuri, she's just kidding. 130 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,184 Don't kid about Santa. 131 00:07:34,184 --> 00:07:34,625 Ever. 132 00:07:39,990 --> 00:07:41,762 (FESTIVE MUSIC PLAYING) 133 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:48,799 This music is quite infectious. 134 00:07:48,799 --> 00:07:49,940 (COUGHING) 135 00:07:51,702 --> 00:07:53,844 So is this guy's wet cough. 136 00:07:55,576 --> 00:07:58,879 The fair ends in two hours! 137 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:01,211 Don't worry. I will get you there. 138 00:08:01,211 --> 00:08:02,683 Although it wouldn't be such a rush 139 00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:04,755 if you had been responsible and done your work. 140 00:08:04,755 --> 00:08:07,217 Hey! At least I know north from south! 141 00:08:10,661 --> 00:08:11,121 What are you doing? 142 00:08:11,121 --> 00:08:13,794 Counting to ten. Just to warn you, 143 00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:14,765 I'm at eight, and it's not working. 144 00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:24,274 (ORIENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) 145 00:08:24,274 --> 00:08:27,137 We have taken the train all the way to China! 146 00:08:29,139 --> 00:08:33,714 You can go a long way for $2.50. 147 00:08:33,714 --> 00:08:37,117 I don't care where we are, as long as they have a park. 148 00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:38,088 And a potty. 149 00:08:39,550 --> 00:08:41,652 Jessie, we're in Chinatown. 150 00:08:41,652 --> 00:08:43,654 We got on the wrong train. Again! 151 00:08:44,895 --> 00:08:45,726 Hey! You think this is easy? 152 00:08:45,726 --> 00:08:49,099 This map looks like the human nervous system! 153 00:08:49,099 --> 00:08:51,301 Is that Staten Island or a hypothalamus? You tell me! 154 00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:55,135 I'm telling you we should take a cab! 155 00:08:55,135 --> 00:08:57,167 We'll never catch one this time of day. 156 00:08:57,167 --> 00:08:59,870 Look, If we take the right train, we can be there in 10 minutes. 157 00:08:59,870 --> 00:09:00,641 That's a big "if." 158 00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:03,874 Meanwhile, my bathroom threat level 159 00:09:03,874 --> 00:09:05,776 just went from green to yellow! 160 00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:12,953 Did you know this man is playing 161 00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:15,626 a traditional Chinese instrument called the ehru? 162 00:09:15,626 --> 00:09:18,789 If I had my sitar, we could kick it Eastern-style. 163 00:09:20,591 --> 00:09:22,032 Okay, I've finally figured out the map. 164 00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:26,597 Oh, great! 165 00:09:26,597 --> 00:09:28,098 Let's just check the map on the wall. 166 00:09:34,675 --> 00:09:37,077 Does it tell us where we are? 167 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,149 No, because someone named "Wang" feels the need to 168 00:09:39,149 --> 00:09:39,950 let everyone know where he's been. 169 00:09:39,950 --> 00:09:43,183 And that he rules. 170 00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,985 Why don't we just ask someone? 171 00:09:44,985 --> 00:09:45,155 (SCREAMS) 172 00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:49,319 ZURI: Oh, come on. 173 00:09:49,319 --> 00:09:52,863 That's the least scary thing that we've seen down here. 174 00:09:52,863 --> 00:09:54,324 Excuse me, Mr. Dragon. Hi. 175 00:09:54,324 --> 00:09:56,727 How do you get to Battery Park? 176 00:09:58,699 --> 00:10:00,671 The four train, got it. Thank you. 177 00:10:02,933 --> 00:10:04,675 Zuri, hurry! 178 00:10:04,675 --> 00:10:06,877 I'm going as fast as I can. 179 00:10:06,877 --> 00:10:09,880 It's times like this, I miss my pull-ups. 180 00:10:20,290 --> 00:10:23,353 Crickets are the speckled recluse's favorite prey. 181 00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:26,156 As soon as it goes for it, 182 00:10:27,297 --> 00:10:30,030 it's sayonara, spidey. 183 00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:32,162 He's woven his last web. 184 00:10:37,968 --> 00:10:39,139 Go! (SCREAMING) 185 00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:43,243 (COUGHING) 186 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:43,273 (SCREAMING) 187 00:10:45,816 --> 00:10:48,248 Victory is ours! 188 00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:49,279 We went all Miss Muffett on his thorax! 189 00:10:54,384 --> 00:10:56,056 Does he look dead? 190 00:10:57,728 --> 00:10:58,658 Nope. 191 00:10:59,830 --> 00:11:01,191 He looks mad. 192 00:11:01,191 --> 00:11:02,893 (SCREAMS) Run! 193 00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,267 There's a seat! Get it! 194 00:11:12,402 --> 00:11:13,974 (GROANING) 195 00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:16,276 That was the worst game of musical chairs ever. 196 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:28,288 (SNIFFS) 197 00:11:31,762 --> 00:11:32,222 Emma, you need to hold on. 198 00:11:32,863 --> 00:11:34,765 (SNEEZES) 199 00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:39,269 I'd rather fall. 200 00:11:41,972 --> 00:11:45,435 Please let this be the right train. 201 00:11:45,435 --> 00:11:47,838 I've always been a good girl. 202 00:11:47,838 --> 00:11:49,279 Okay, once in seventh grade, 203 00:11:49,279 --> 00:11:51,381 I stole Mindy Dropkin's chocolate bar. 204 00:11:51,381 --> 00:11:52,312 But all I had was an apple. 205 00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:56,186 And quite frankly, with her acne, I was doing her a favor. 206 00:11:56,186 --> 00:11:58,718 So please let this be the right train. 207 00:12:00,050 --> 00:12:03,193 Having a private conversation here. 208 00:12:03,193 --> 00:12:05,295 (INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT OVER PA) 209 00:12:05,295 --> 00:12:06,256 Thanks. What would we do without you? 210 00:12:15,465 --> 00:12:17,367 Ha! You had that coming. 211 00:12:21,041 --> 00:12:22,212 (ACCORDION PLAYING) 212 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:33,323 And now we are in Germany! 213 00:12:33,323 --> 00:12:35,285 This truly is a magic train. 214 00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:41,291 I think we're in Yorkville, 215 00:12:41,291 --> 00:12:43,864 a German neighborhood on the upper east side. 216 00:12:43,864 --> 00:12:47,197 Which is even farther away from Battery Park! 217 00:12:47,197 --> 00:12:49,870 When will I learn not to take directions from dragons? 218 00:12:51,241 --> 00:12:52,903 I'm never going to make the fair, 219 00:12:52,903 --> 00:12:54,945 and my whole grade depends on that report. 220 00:12:54,945 --> 00:12:57,177 You will! You'll get to the fair. 221 00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:59,379 Ravi, you will see the Statue of Liberty. 222 00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:02,112 And Zuri, I will get you to a park and a bathroom. 223 00:13:02,112 --> 00:13:04,114 I already took care of the bathroom thing. 224 00:13:05,215 --> 00:13:06,817 You don't want to know. 225 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,961 You're right. I don't. 226 00:13:10,961 --> 00:13:13,423 Okay, I'm pretty sure I've got it now. 227 00:13:13,423 --> 00:13:16,126 So we take just a few more stops, 228 00:13:16,126 --> 00:13:18,899 and then we transfer to the express train downtown. 229 00:13:18,899 --> 00:13:20,570 Next stop, an A on your paper. 230 00:13:21,932 --> 00:13:23,373 Emma? 231 00:13:23,373 --> 00:13:25,235 Where are Emma and Ravi? 232 00:13:25,235 --> 00:13:26,877 Oh, no! No, no, no! 233 00:13:26,877 --> 00:13:28,909 Open the doors! Stop the train! 234 00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:31,381 RAVI: Jessie! Jessie! 235 00:13:31,381 --> 00:13:34,184 Jessie! Jessie! 236 00:13:35,545 --> 00:13:37,047 Stop the train! 237 00:13:37,047 --> 00:13:38,818 RAVI: Jessie! Jessie! 238 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:39,850 Stop! 239 00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:47,597 If we never see them again, can I have Emma's room? 240 00:13:49,599 --> 00:13:50,560 Too soon? 241 00:13:57,167 --> 00:13:59,169 (RAVI SOBBING) 242 00:13:59,169 --> 00:14:01,271 Ravi, Jessie will come back for us! 243 00:14:01,271 --> 00:14:02,913 Calm down! 244 00:14:02,913 --> 00:14:05,345 Oh, no! We have to get out of here! 245 00:14:08,518 --> 00:14:11,321 Be careful, little boy. 246 00:14:11,321 --> 00:14:14,925 By the way, nice traveling outfit. 247 00:14:14,925 --> 00:14:17,087 You have very hard suspender buttons. 248 00:14:17,087 --> 00:14:18,889 Ja, and now you have mein family crest 249 00:14:18,889 --> 00:14:20,130 stamped on your forehead. 250 00:14:21,431 --> 00:14:22,492 We have to go find Jessie! 251 00:14:22,492 --> 00:14:24,895 No. Remember, Jessie said if we're ever lost, 252 00:14:24,895 --> 00:14:27,197 stay put and hug a tree. 253 00:14:27,197 --> 00:14:27,968 I see no trees! 254 00:14:29,339 --> 00:14:32,302 May I? 255 00:14:32,302 --> 00:14:35,245 (GROANS) Your fingernails are digging into mein lederhosen. 256 00:14:39,449 --> 00:14:42,152 Okay, there's two of us, and one spider. 257 00:14:42,152 --> 00:14:44,654 One spider. Here's the play. 258 00:14:44,654 --> 00:14:46,586 You charge at him, and if he goes right, 259 00:14:46,586 --> 00:14:49,159 you hit him with this. 260 00:14:49,159 --> 00:14:51,061 What if he goes left? 261 00:14:51,061 --> 00:14:51,891 You hit him with this. 262 00:14:54,364 --> 00:14:54,894 What if he comes right at me? 263 00:14:56,666 --> 00:14:56,927 Game over. 264 00:14:59,629 --> 00:15:01,932 And where are you gonna be during all this? 265 00:15:01,932 --> 00:15:03,503 I'm going to the movies. 266 00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:05,635 Oh, no, you're not. You're grounded. 267 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:11,011 Bertram, you've already failed at life. 268 00:15:11,011 --> 00:15:12,983 I've still got all my failure ahead of me. 269 00:15:15,685 --> 00:15:17,517 See you. (GASPS) 270 00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:20,090 Ew! Spiderweb! Bertram, help! 271 00:15:20,090 --> 00:15:23,093 No! It might be on you! 272 00:15:28,698 --> 00:15:30,130 (MUSIC PLAYING) 273 00:15:37,007 --> 00:15:37,937 (PEOPLE CLAPPING) 274 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:43,143 Fritz. 275 00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:46,576 You're quite light on your feet for such a mountain of a man. 276 00:15:46,576 --> 00:15:48,618 Danke. 277 00:15:48,618 --> 00:15:51,181 Would you like to try some eisbein mit sauerkraut? 278 00:15:52,682 --> 00:15:54,284 Sure. 279 00:15:54,284 --> 00:15:54,624 Mmm! 280 00:15:54,624 --> 00:15:58,658 Mmm. Not bad. 281 00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:01,331 What is this delightful treat? 282 00:16:01,331 --> 00:16:03,263 It is my grossmutter's pickled cabbage mit pork knuckles. 283 00:16:09,299 --> 00:16:11,971 And suddenly I am full. 284 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,443 This puts the gross in grossmutter. 285 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:22,152 Where is Jessie? It has been more than 20 minutes. 286 00:16:22,152 --> 00:16:24,684 She'll find us. I'm positive. 287 00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,986 Have you not been paying attention today? 288 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,089 The woman could not find her way out of an elevator! 289 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:35,395 Okay, Jessie may not be good on the subway, 290 00:16:35,395 --> 00:16:37,097 but I know she'll come back for us. 291 00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:37,767 Emma! Ravi! 292 00:16:37,767 --> 00:16:39,029 Jessie! Jessie! 293 00:16:39,369 --> 00:16:41,631 Oh! 294 00:16:41,631 --> 00:16:43,303 Oh! Thank goodness! 295 00:16:44,634 --> 00:16:47,177 I told you they'd still be alive. 296 00:16:47,177 --> 00:16:52,212 Although I did not see the elf hats coming. 297 00:16:52,212 --> 00:16:55,045 Actually, these are traditional Bavarian Alpine hats. 298 00:16:55,045 --> 00:16:56,316 Right, Fritz? Ja wohl. 299 00:16:58,288 --> 00:17:00,090 I'm so proud of you guys 300 00:17:00,090 --> 00:17:02,552 for remembering what I told you to do if you ever got lost. 301 00:17:02,552 --> 00:17:04,224 You stayed calm, and you stayed put. 302 00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:09,259 Actually, I was running around like a mongoose at a cobra convention, 303 00:17:09,259 --> 00:17:11,101 but then, Emma calmed me down. 304 00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:15,235 Great job, Emma. Way to be responsible. 305 00:17:16,306 --> 00:17:19,539 By the way, (CHUCKLES) 306 00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,571 we don't ever need to tell your parents about this whole 307 00:17:21,571 --> 00:17:24,114 getting lost on the subway thing, right? 308 00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:25,745 ALL: Right! 309 00:17:25,745 --> 00:17:28,778 Ja. I hear nothing, I see nothing. 310 00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:34,784 Meanwhile, the fair closes in an hour. 311 00:17:34,784 --> 00:17:37,387 And we will make it. 312 00:17:37,387 --> 00:17:41,231 All right. This time, everybody get on in front of me. 313 00:17:41,231 --> 00:17:43,193 Bye, Fritz. Thank you for teaching us 314 00:17:43,193 --> 00:17:45,395 your colorful, and somewhat abusive, traditional dance. 315 00:17:46,136 --> 00:17:49,099 Auf wiedersehen, Fritz! 316 00:17:49,099 --> 00:17:52,372 See? Watching every episode of Project Runway does pay off. 317 00:17:57,807 --> 00:18:01,651 Remember, no matter what happens, we have to stick together. 318 00:18:01,651 --> 00:18:03,683 Right. Together. 319 00:18:03,683 --> 00:18:06,286 (BOTH SCREAMING) 320 00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:07,857 It's every man for himself! 321 00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:16,726 Did you get him? No, he's on the counter. 322 00:18:16,726 --> 00:18:18,728 What? 323 00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:21,201 Now he's on the cereal! 324 00:18:23,203 --> 00:18:25,475 Man, that thing is fast. 325 00:18:25,475 --> 00:18:26,636 Not as fast as me. 326 00:18:32,182 --> 00:18:33,483 Where are you going? 327 00:18:33,483 --> 00:18:36,346 Anywhere but here. And if this gets any more terrifying, 328 00:18:36,346 --> 00:18:37,787 I might even take the stairs! 329 00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:43,153 (BOTH SCREAMING) 330 00:18:47,197 --> 00:18:48,428 He's getting closer! 331 00:18:52,732 --> 00:18:54,434 Mr. Kipling, you saved us! 332 00:18:56,666 --> 00:19:00,340 And my therapist says you can't solve your problems by eating them. 333 00:19:04,614 --> 00:19:07,617 You are smaller than I thought you would be. 334 00:19:07,617 --> 00:19:11,281 And I did not expect Lady Liberty to have such hairy pits. 335 00:19:13,223 --> 00:19:15,355 Whee! 336 00:19:15,355 --> 00:19:17,527 We will be at the fair in five minutes. 337 00:19:17,527 --> 00:19:18,728 Told you the subway was great. 338 00:19:21,791 --> 00:19:23,593 (WOMAN ON PA) Stalled train ahead. 339 00:19:23,593 --> 00:19:26,236 We'll be stopped here for 45 minutes to an hour. 340 00:19:26,236 --> 00:19:28,338 Have a good day. 341 00:19:28,338 --> 00:19:31,571 What? You finally say something I can understand and that's it? 342 00:19:31,571 --> 00:19:34,804 I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! 343 00:19:34,804 --> 00:19:38,177 People are staring. 344 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,549 And that's saying something in New York. 345 00:19:40,850 --> 00:19:43,713 I give up. I messed up everyone's day. 346 00:19:43,713 --> 00:19:45,815 Zuri never even got to go to the park. 347 00:19:45,815 --> 00:19:47,317 Whee! Look at me! Look at me! 348 00:19:51,421 --> 00:19:52,462 Don't look at me! 349 00:19:54,864 --> 00:19:57,367 Ravi never got to see the Statue of Liberty. 350 00:19:57,367 --> 00:19:58,798 Say, "Green card." 351 00:20:02,932 --> 00:20:06,806 Mr. Lady Liberty is even more wonderful than I dreamed. 352 00:20:06,806 --> 00:20:10,810 She/he gave me a coupon 353 00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:13,443 for a free hot dog at the Liber-dog Deli. 354 00:20:13,943 --> 00:20:15,245 What a country! 355 00:20:18,948 --> 00:20:21,691 Jessie, look around you. 356 00:20:21,691 --> 00:20:24,394 Zuri and Ravi had a great time. 357 00:20:24,394 --> 00:20:27,427 And I did get to see parts of New York I've never seen. 358 00:20:27,427 --> 00:20:29,459 Or smelled before. 359 00:20:29,459 --> 00:20:32,802 Hold up. Did you take pictures of everything you saw today? 360 00:20:32,802 --> 00:20:35,265 Yep. You want to see a rat inside a burrito? 361 00:20:35,265 --> 00:20:37,807 Pass. No. 362 00:20:37,807 --> 00:20:40,810 What I mean is you met tons of different people 363 00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:42,972 from tons of different cultures all over the city, right? 364 00:20:42,972 --> 00:20:43,843 Right. 365 00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:47,817 Here's a traditional Dominican band playing Merengue. 366 00:20:47,817 --> 00:20:50,650 This is an ehru, a two stringed Chinese instrument 367 00:20:50,650 --> 00:20:54,253 that sounds kind of like a cat giving birth. 368 00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,856 Ooh, and here's Ravi eating a German delicacy, 369 00:20:56,856 --> 00:20:58,728 pickled pork knuckles. 370 00:20:58,728 --> 00:21:01,260 And here's Ravi throwing up pickled pork knuckles. 371 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:06,766 So do a little more research tonight, 372 00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:08,968 slap on a title page, and there's your "A" paper! 373 00:21:10,470 --> 00:21:12,302 You're right! 374 00:21:12,302 --> 00:21:14,374 Thanks, Jessie! 375 00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:16,906 Oh, next week I have a paper on primates. 376 00:21:16,906 --> 00:21:18,478 Can we take the subway to the Bronx Zoo? 377 00:21:20,450 --> 00:21:22,352 You can. I'm taking a cab. 378 00:21:27,757 --> 00:21:31,591 Okay, everything's back to normal. 379 00:21:31,591 --> 00:21:34,424 Except for that big dent in the counter. 380 00:21:34,424 --> 00:21:36,966 By the way, when your parents are home don't ever move that vase. 381 00:21:38,668 --> 00:21:40,670 Hey, wanna go watch a movie? 382 00:21:40,670 --> 00:21:43,933 Sure. Anything except Arachnophobia, or Charlotte's Web. 383 00:21:48,978 --> 00:21:50,380 (BOTH GASPING) 384 00:21:53,943 --> 00:21:55,815 Remember when we read that the speckled recluse 385 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,017 could lay up to 2,000 eggs? 386 00:21:58,017 --> 00:21:58,518 Uh-huh. 387 00:21:58,518 --> 00:22:01,721 I think our spider was a mommy. 388 00:22:01,721 --> 00:22:04,824 And we got ourselves some angry orphans! 389 00:22:07,697 --> 00:22:09,959 All right, guys, keep it down. I don't want to wake Zuri. 390 00:22:09,959 --> 00:22:12,331 I'm not asleep. I just didn't want to walk. 391 00:22:14,934 --> 00:22:16,065 Well played. 392 00:22:16,966 --> 00:22:18,608 I'm starving. 393 00:22:18,608 --> 00:22:21,340 Do you think Bertram has dinner ready? 394 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:22,442 (SCREAMING) Bertram, they're on your back! 395 00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:24,814 Get it off! Get it off! 396 00:22:25,945 --> 00:22:28,878 He looks busy. 397 00:22:28,878 --> 00:22:30,079 Anyone for the Statue of Liber-dog Deli? 398 00:22:30,079 --> 00:22:32,482 ALL: Yeah! 399 00:22:32,482 --> 00:22:33,483 I'm going to order the Benjamin Frankfurter.