1 00:00:06,337 --> 00:00:08,079 (CLEARS THROAT) Your principal just called... 2 00:00:08,079 --> 00:00:09,180 It was Luke! It was Zuri! 3 00:00:09,180 --> 00:00:10,541 It was Ravi! It was me! 4 00:00:12,383 --> 00:00:14,445 I assume I'm covering for you. 5 00:00:15,616 --> 00:00:17,518 It was all of you. 6 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:19,620 Apparently you didn't turn in your money from 7 00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,492 the charity muffin sale last month. 8 00:00:21,492 --> 00:00:25,156 The muffins I slaved over a hot cab ride to the bakery for! 9 00:00:26,657 --> 00:00:29,029 We didn't turn it in because... 10 00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:30,561 Because... 11 00:00:30,561 --> 00:00:32,703 Ravi put it in the bank to earn interest. 12 00:00:32,703 --> 00:00:37,508 I suggested mutual funds, but no, those are too risky. 13 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,640 What? Okay. 14 00:00:40,111 --> 00:00:42,373 But if you're lying to me, the next time you leave your rooms 15 00:00:42,373 --> 00:00:44,675 will be for college. And wherever you two go. 16 00:00:47,648 --> 00:00:50,281 I am guessing by the unrepentant fibbery 17 00:00:50,281 --> 00:00:52,623 that none of you sold your muffins either? 18 00:00:52,823 --> 00:00:56,056 I was going to, but I couldn't find the right muffin-selling outfit. 19 00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,388 Nothing goes with bran! 20 00:00:59,090 --> 00:01:02,263 And I tried to sell mine on Butterfly Scout turf. 21 00:01:02,493 --> 00:01:04,695 Those little girls smashed my muffins 22 00:01:04,695 --> 00:01:07,638 and called me names that would make a construction worker blush. 23 00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:12,303 Oh, I just remembered. Mine are still in my room! 24 00:01:13,744 --> 00:01:16,247 Ta-da! Muffin time! 25 00:01:16,707 --> 00:01:19,680 Luke, those things are probably hard as rocks by now. 26 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:22,183 They're fine. Here, Ravi, try one. (ELEVATOR DINGS) 27 00:01:22,613 --> 00:01:23,784 Aah! A ball! 28 00:01:24,515 --> 00:01:25,616 Oh! Ow! 29 00:01:31,292 --> 00:01:34,665 Aw! I can't stand to see him like this. 30 00:01:35,366 --> 00:01:36,867 (ELEVATOR DINGS) 31 00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:38,699 Problem solved. 32 00:01:40,671 --> 00:01:43,574 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh 33 00:01:43,574 --> 00:01:47,338 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 34 00:01:47,338 --> 00:01:50,641 ♪ It feels like a party every day 35 00:01:50,641 --> 00:01:54,385 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 36 00:01:54,385 --> 00:01:57,848 ♪ But they keep on pulling me every which way 37 00:01:57,848 --> 00:02:01,422 ♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie 38 00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:05,125 ♪ My whole world is changing Turning around 39 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:08,699 ♪ They got me going crazy Yeah, they're shaking the ground 40 00:02:08,699 --> 00:02:12,503 ♪ But they took a chance on the new girl in town 41 00:02:12,503 --> 00:02:15,866 ♪ And I don't want to let them down, down, down 42 00:02:15,866 --> 00:02:17,638 ♪ Hey Jessie 43 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,212 ♪ Hey Jessie 44 00:02:23,174 --> 00:02:26,647 ♪ It feels like a party every day 45 00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:29,680 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Jessie ♪ 46 00:02:32,883 --> 00:02:35,686 Thank you so much for this luxurious picnic, Jessie. 47 00:02:35,926 --> 00:02:39,290 I have been craving some quality Ravi-nanny time. 48 00:02:39,290 --> 00:02:42,263 Aww, that's so sweet. And sad. 49 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,635 We really need to find you a play group. 50 00:02:45,796 --> 00:02:47,738 Ah! I knew it was you! 51 00:02:47,738 --> 00:02:51,171 I should hope so. We've only lived in the same penthouse for two years now. 52 00:02:51,802 --> 00:02:54,575 I mean, I know you've got my gouda. 53 00:02:54,575 --> 00:02:56,847 (SNIFFING) In the... 54 00:02:56,847 --> 00:02:59,550 South... (SNIFFING) West... 55 00:03:00,651 --> 00:03:02,353 Oh! Corner of your basket! 56 00:03:03,314 --> 00:03:04,555 Oh! 57 00:03:05,216 --> 00:03:06,687 How do you do that? 58 00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:08,759 It's cheese. It's my superpower. 59 00:03:08,759 --> 00:03:10,861 I'm not saying it's a good one, but it's mine. 60 00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:13,824 And so is this. (CHUCKLING) 61 00:03:13,824 --> 00:03:15,696 Hey! Give me back my lunch! 62 00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:19,970 No, don't put me on hold again! 63 00:03:19,970 --> 00:03:23,274 If I go over my minutes, my mom's gonna kick me off the family plan! 64 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:26,707 No, it's Max Bauer, Katie's agent. 65 00:03:27,678 --> 00:03:30,511 What you do mean she fired me? 66 00:03:30,511 --> 00:03:31,582 Oh, you mean she fired me. 67 00:03:33,684 --> 00:03:35,616 I can't catch a break! 68 00:03:36,447 --> 00:03:38,689 Uh, you are sitting in vindaloo. 69 00:03:38,689 --> 00:03:39,990 You said it, kid. 70 00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:44,595 This whole week has been one big vindaloo storm! 71 00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:49,330 Uh, forgive me, but did you say you were an agent? 72 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,602 The best in town! 73 00:03:51,862 --> 00:03:53,264 Just don't ask which town. 74 00:03:53,864 --> 00:03:55,235 Uh, this is perfect. 75 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,368 My nanny has been looking for an agent to help 76 00:03:57,368 --> 00:03:59,640 her find jobs in the business you call "show." 77 00:04:00,971 --> 00:04:02,673 Let me go get her. 78 00:04:03,314 --> 00:04:06,647 Fine! You want the cheese so bad? Eat it! Eat it all! 79 00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:08,649 (VOCALIZING) 80 00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:10,581 Unfortunately, she has stepped away. 81 00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:16,827 Look, are you gonna give us the money or not? 82 00:04:16,827 --> 00:04:18,529 Uh, not. 83 00:04:18,529 --> 00:04:21,362 Why don't you use your allowance to make up the muffin money? 84 00:04:21,362 --> 00:04:23,594 You guys clear more per week than the mayor. 85 00:04:24,635 --> 00:04:26,337 We get our allowance on Sunday. 86 00:04:26,337 --> 00:04:27,568 There's none left by now. 87 00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:28,839 It's Tuesday! 88 00:04:31,542 --> 00:04:35,676 I know! But I bought Chase Logan's autographed poster and concert-worn hat. 89 00:04:35,676 --> 00:04:37,778 (GASPS) Ooh, a hair! 90 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,580 Even his dandruff is cute. 91 00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:44,355 That dweeb pop star? Please! 92 00:04:44,355 --> 00:04:45,716 He's a dancing mop. 93 00:04:48,559 --> 00:04:50,921 You know, Mom always has fundraising parties 94 00:04:50,921 --> 00:04:52,593 when she needs money for her charities. 95 00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:53,824 That's what we should do. 96 00:04:54,525 --> 00:04:55,726 Great idea! 97 00:04:55,726 --> 00:04:57,297 We can charge kids a cover, 98 00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,299 then give all the proceeds to the school. 99 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,931 But if we throw a party here, 100 00:05:00,931 --> 00:05:04,034 then Jessie will know that we lied right to her face. 101 00:05:04,034 --> 00:05:06,577 I got it! We can have it at our house in the Hamptons. 102 00:05:06,837 --> 00:05:10,741 Great! But what are we gonna do about Nanny McGrounds-A-Lot? 103 00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:13,744 Oh, I wouldn't worry about Jessie. 104 00:05:13,744 --> 00:05:15,416 She's been banned from the Hamptons 105 00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:18,589 ever since she "fell asleep" on Channing Tatum's front lawn. 106 00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:20,951 Twice. 107 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,096 Hi, Max? Jessie Prescott. 108 00:05:26,096 --> 00:05:28,629 Uh, a fragile-looking Indian boy gave me your card. 109 00:05:31,362 --> 00:05:33,534 What agency does this guy work for anyway? 110 00:05:33,534 --> 00:05:34,965 His card says "C.A.E." 111 00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:37,668 Their agents only represent the best actors. 112 00:05:37,668 --> 00:05:39,009 Then what do they want with Jessie? 113 00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,573 I have absolutely no idea. 114 00:05:43,774 --> 00:05:46,477 Guys, I have a meeting with an agent! 115 00:05:46,477 --> 00:05:47,948 And this time, he knows about it. 116 00:05:51,782 --> 00:05:54,054 I can't wait for our Hamptons party! 117 00:05:54,455 --> 00:05:56,056 And I cannot wait to DJ! 118 00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:58,659 I have compiled a list of the illest party jams 119 00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:01,131 that are sure to get the house a-rocking. 120 00:06:02,733 --> 00:06:04,735 Has the Macarena hit the States yet? 121 00:06:06,737 --> 00:06:09,099 Guys, did you hear the horrible news? 122 00:06:09,099 --> 00:06:12,142 Don't worry, we're not gonna let Ravi play the Macarena. 123 00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:15,646 Or... "Who Let the Cobras Out"? 124 00:06:16,607 --> 00:06:18,409 It was a huge hit in India! 125 00:06:18,409 --> 00:06:21,452 Based on a very true, very sad story. 126 00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:24,885 No! Dad just lost our Hamptons house 127 00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:27,157 to Steven Spielberg in a game of rock-paper-scissors. 128 00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:31,622 How many times have we told him not to always pick "rock"? 129 00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:33,494 Word gets out! 130 00:06:33,994 --> 00:06:36,827 So, what are we going to do about raising that muffin money? 131 00:06:37,027 --> 00:06:39,600 How about we have an outdoor party? 132 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:40,801 We could have it on the roof! 133 00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:42,803 Not now, Luke! The smart kids are thinking. 134 00:06:44,835 --> 00:06:46,807 Thank you, Zuri. Not you. 135 00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:51,912 No, the roof is a terrible idea. 136 00:06:52,683 --> 00:06:56,887 What if it rains? Or snows? Or sharknadoes? 137 00:06:58,989 --> 00:07:01,752 Dodgy attitude, nervous sweating... 138 00:07:02,493 --> 00:07:04,094 You're hiding something on the roof. 139 00:07:04,094 --> 00:07:06,697 What is it? Candy stash? Stink bombs? 140 00:07:08,699 --> 00:07:09,930 (COOING) 141 00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:11,702 ALL: Pigeons? 142 00:07:13,664 --> 00:07:15,666 They have been trained to defend me. 143 00:07:15,906 --> 00:07:20,010 I have a feeling I might not be popular in high school. 144 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:24,815 And you think attack pigeons are your fast pass out of Wedgieville? 145 00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:28,519 Actually, the roof is perfect. 146 00:07:28,819 --> 00:07:31,021 All we have to do is cover up the cage of flying rats. 147 00:07:31,752 --> 00:07:33,053 "Flying rats"? 148 00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,686 They are highly trained aerial assassins. 149 00:07:35,686 --> 00:07:38,859 (SCOFFS) Dude, what could these tiny things possibly do... 150 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:40,761 Ka-kaw! 151 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,795 Hi. Are you Max? 152 00:07:44,795 --> 00:07:46,036 That's me! 153 00:07:46,036 --> 00:07:49,099 Unless you're a bill collector, in which case, I'm Tina. 154 00:07:51,201 --> 00:07:53,874 Well, I'm not a bill collector. I'm Jessie Prescott, 155 00:07:53,874 --> 00:07:55,776 and I'm ready my screen test. 156 00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:57,508 Great. Let's begin. 157 00:07:57,948 --> 00:07:59,650 Uh. Oh, okay. 158 00:07:59,910 --> 00:08:02,983 (CLEARS THROAT) Here is a monologue from my one-woman show, 159 00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:06,587 entitled The Girl Who Was Too Pretty to Get Asked to the Dance. 160 00:08:08,859 --> 00:08:10,561 I don't want to hear you talk, 161 00:08:10,561 --> 00:08:11,792 I just need footage of your hands. 162 00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:14,765 And might I say, they are quite magnificent. 163 00:08:17,768 --> 00:08:20,871 Perfect nail beds, awesome cuticles... 164 00:08:20,871 --> 00:08:22,603 (GASPS) No knuckle hair. 165 00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:24,675 Aw... All right! Back off, Tina! I have pepper spray. 166 00:08:25,676 --> 00:08:28,078 Oh, no, no. I was just looking at your moneymakers. 167 00:08:28,579 --> 00:08:31,542 What is not clear to you about the phrase, "I have pepper spray"? 168 00:08:33,043 --> 00:08:34,645 I thought you were an agent. 169 00:08:34,645 --> 00:08:36,817 I am. For hand models. 170 00:08:36,817 --> 00:08:39,750 You know those commercials where you see hands holding something? 171 00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:42,522 I represent the people attached to those hands. 172 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,825 But your card says you work at C.A.E. 173 00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:48,198 I do! "Creative Appendage Employment"! 174 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:52,603 Oh, you probably thought it was the other C.A.E. 175 00:08:52,603 --> 00:08:53,904 Man, I wish! 176 00:08:53,904 --> 00:08:55,836 Then I wouldn't have to work out of the park. 177 00:08:56,166 --> 00:08:57,868 Sometimes squirrels take my lunch. 178 00:08:59,009 --> 00:09:01,772 Listen, Max. I appreciate your interest, 179 00:09:01,772 --> 00:09:04,615 but I moved to New York to make my whole body a star. 180 00:09:04,915 --> 00:09:07,217 Uh, you know, some of these hand modeling gigs 181 00:09:07,217 --> 00:09:09,219 pay $5,000 each. 182 00:09:11,181 --> 00:09:13,023 Get these hands a pen! Where do I sign? 183 00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:18,759 JESSIE: Bertram, can you help me? 184 00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:21,692 My agent says I need pictures of my hands for my portfolio, 185 00:09:21,692 --> 00:09:23,694 but all I have is my kindergarten hand turkey. 186 00:09:23,694 --> 00:09:26,296 Which I would really like to get off the refrigerator. 187 00:09:31,001 --> 00:09:33,073 You know, Jessie, 188 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:35,305 glamour shots are so cliche. 189 00:09:35,305 --> 00:09:36,777 They need to see your hands in action. 190 00:09:37,848 --> 00:09:39,780 No, no, no, don't pose! Act natural. 191 00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,883 Oh. Yes! Oh, nice bowl-work. 192 00:09:43,353 --> 00:09:44,785 Yes! 193 00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:47,788 Now get those dirty plates. Oh! Wonderful! 194 00:09:47,788 --> 00:09:48,759 Perfect! Like this? How's that? 195 00:09:48,759 --> 00:09:49,960 Yeah! Now put 'em in the sink. Okay. 196 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:51,762 Oh, so natural! 197 00:09:51,762 --> 00:09:54,825 Oh! Now, um, uh, start wiping down the counter. 198 00:09:54,825 --> 00:09:56,596 Um, is this, is this working for ya? 199 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:57,968 That is working great! 200 00:09:57,968 --> 00:10:00,600 You gettin' it? Good! Now, now wipe off the table. 201 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,033 Yeah, that's it. 202 00:10:03,373 --> 00:10:04,775 Really put your back into it. 203 00:10:08,639 --> 00:10:10,811 Oh, I get it. 204 00:10:15,846 --> 00:10:17,818 You got a little something on your head. 205 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,851 And I'll give you a hint, it's not hair. 206 00:10:24,755 --> 00:10:26,757 Okay, so the dance floor goes here. 207 00:10:26,757 --> 00:10:29,029 And then the DJ booth can go right there. 208 00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,661 I'm gonna paint it purple. 209 00:10:30,661 --> 00:10:31,862 Hey, kids. 210 00:10:32,763 --> 00:10:36,266 And that, my friends, is how you divide a decimal. 211 00:10:38,008 --> 00:10:41,271 Guess what? Actually, don't, don't guess. It's always insulting. 212 00:10:43,013 --> 00:10:46,977 Anyway, my new agent just got me a job on a late-night infomercial! 213 00:10:46,977 --> 00:10:48,648 Nice, Jessie! Up top! 214 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:50,420 Wha... (SCREAMS) N... Not the hands! Ow! 215 00:10:51,051 --> 00:10:53,984 Hey! Add my hands to the list of things you cannot touch. 216 00:11:00,090 --> 00:11:02,262 Hey! If she's gone tomorrow night, 217 00:11:02,262 --> 00:11:03,694 that's when we should have the party. 218 00:11:03,694 --> 00:11:06,066 You're right! Quick, everyone text all of your friends. 219 00:11:07,798 --> 00:11:08,699 (BEEPS) 220 00:11:08,699 --> 00:11:09,700 (DINGS) 221 00:11:10,741 --> 00:11:12,843 Ravi, I already know about the party. 222 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,747 Oh. Then I am done. 223 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,982 Guys, want to come to a commercial shoot 224 00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:23,914 and see these bad boys in action? 225 00:11:23,914 --> 00:11:25,015 Nope. Uh-uh. 226 00:11:25,015 --> 00:11:26,186 Meh. Pass. 227 00:11:27,417 --> 00:11:31,121 Fine. See if I ever go to one of your "talent" shows again. 228 00:11:36,026 --> 00:11:38,298 Jessie, this warm wax treatment 229 00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:42,172 will take you on a jasmine-scented journey of relaxation. 230 00:11:42,172 --> 00:11:43,333 JESSIE: Mmm. 231 00:11:47,037 --> 00:11:48,208 That'd be nice. 232 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:51,381 The last journey my hands took was into the toilet to fish out Zuri's cell phone. 233 00:11:52,142 --> 00:11:54,114 Why can't she ever drop it before she goes? 234 00:11:55,846 --> 00:12:00,090 I will now make you my special brand of stress-reducing tea 235 00:12:00,350 --> 00:12:04,224 while your eyes are covered and you cannot see anything. 236 00:12:06,496 --> 00:12:09,760 Uh, so if you hear a bunch of noise and shuffling behind you, 237 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,131 that is what it is. 238 00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:13,733 All part of the vigorous tea-making process. 239 00:12:14,404 --> 00:12:17,007 Nothing more. And when you hear the ding, 240 00:12:17,007 --> 00:12:18,969 dip your hands into the wax. 241 00:12:19,509 --> 00:12:21,411 (DINGING) 242 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:28,518 (SIGHS) 243 00:12:28,518 --> 00:12:32,052 See? Does that not feel... Dear Gods! 244 00:12:34,024 --> 00:12:35,926 Nanny mode activated! What's the emergency? 245 00:12:35,926 --> 00:12:37,487 Code red? Code blue? 246 00:12:38,428 --> 00:12:40,430 Code purple? Code purple! 247 00:12:43,133 --> 00:12:44,494 Are things not dire enough 248 00:12:44,494 --> 00:12:47,237 without you introducing a new code? 249 00:12:49,239 --> 00:12:53,173 It's not coming off! The commercial shoot is in two hours! 250 00:12:53,343 --> 00:12:55,445 If it is any consolation, 251 00:12:55,445 --> 00:12:58,809 the color of that hand really makes your eyes pop! 252 00:12:59,910 --> 00:13:01,551 I'd throttle you, but the purple fingerprints 253 00:13:01,551 --> 00:13:02,953 would lead the cops right to me! 254 00:13:13,463 --> 00:13:14,524 You're late. 255 00:13:14,524 --> 00:13:17,828 Yeah. We have a little problem. I... 256 00:13:17,828 --> 00:13:19,269 Just don't make a big deal out of it. 257 00:13:19,269 --> 00:13:22,502 Jessie, I've been in the hand game a long time now, 258 00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:24,274 and I've seen it all... (SCREAMING) 259 00:13:26,436 --> 00:13:28,478 Except that! Way to play it cool. 260 00:13:28,879 --> 00:13:30,380 (LAUGHING NERVOUSLY) 261 00:13:30,380 --> 00:13:32,012 You are gonna get us fired! 262 00:13:32,012 --> 00:13:33,513 And if I don't pay rent this month, 263 00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:35,515 my mom's totally gonna kick me out of her basement! 264 00:13:36,286 --> 00:13:40,190 Oh, that explains why you smell like mildew and old couch. 265 00:13:45,225 --> 00:13:47,227 I can't believe no one came to our party. 266 00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:48,999 We're never gonna make back that muffin money. 267 00:13:49,359 --> 00:13:52,502 Looking back, perhaps we should not have charged 50 bucks a ticket. 268 00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:55,605 May be people are just fashionably late. 269 00:13:56,106 --> 00:13:58,438 We passed fashionably late an hour ago. 270 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,840 Now it is personal. 271 00:14:01,471 --> 00:14:03,944 I can't have Jessie punish me again. 272 00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:05,545 I've been grounded so many times, 273 00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:08,548 the last video game I played was Grand Theft Covered Wagon. 274 00:14:14,024 --> 00:14:15,255 Thank goodness! 275 00:14:15,585 --> 00:14:18,388 My party record remains as unblemished as my face. 276 00:14:20,190 --> 00:14:21,631 Yeah, thanks to me. 277 00:14:22,132 --> 00:14:25,165 People are only here because I posted online 278 00:14:25,165 --> 00:14:30,270 that Chase Logan is taking time off from his world tour to come to our party. 279 00:14:30,570 --> 00:14:32,943 He is? How do I look? 280 00:14:34,574 --> 00:14:36,476 As gullible as the rest of these suckers. 281 00:14:37,247 --> 00:14:39,049 'Cause he's not coming. 282 00:14:39,049 --> 00:14:42,082 Uh, Zuri, don't you think people are going to be really mad 283 00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:44,414 when they find out they've been lied to? 284 00:14:44,414 --> 00:14:47,617 Hey, I just handle promotions. 285 00:14:47,617 --> 00:14:50,320 This is now officially a dumb kids' problem. 286 00:14:54,224 --> 00:14:55,996 Ow, ow, ow! I think I can see bone! 287 00:15:00,030 --> 00:15:01,531 Can't we just reschedule? 288 00:15:01,531 --> 00:15:03,373 Oh, brilliant idea. 289 00:15:03,373 --> 00:15:05,976 Delaying production will only cost an extra $50,000! 290 00:15:06,376 --> 00:15:07,477 Great. So, like, Tuesday then? 291 00:15:08,578 --> 00:15:10,480 You'll just have to hide it from them. Hide what? 292 00:15:10,941 --> 00:15:14,044 Uh... My enthusiasm for this job! 293 00:15:14,044 --> 00:15:15,645 Can't wait to get started, sir! 294 00:15:17,147 --> 00:15:19,589 Just hold up the product, watch your shadows, 295 00:15:19,589 --> 00:15:21,251 and try not to get cut or burned. 296 00:15:21,251 --> 00:15:22,292 Uh, wait. Say what, now? 297 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:25,255 Okay, bring in the Kitchen Dragon! 298 00:15:27,557 --> 00:15:28,598 No, no, no... 299 00:15:32,362 --> 00:15:34,504 O-M-G! I could lose a finger! 300 00:15:34,704 --> 00:15:37,207 If you do, try and make it the pinkie. 301 00:15:37,467 --> 00:15:38,668 It's not your best finger. 302 00:15:39,569 --> 00:15:42,472 You know, I'm beginning to see why you can't afford an office. 303 00:15:42,472 --> 00:15:44,614 Or an apartment. Or a belt. 304 00:15:49,579 --> 00:15:53,323 Wow, people are ticked off that Chase Logan's not here. 305 00:15:53,523 --> 00:15:56,426 I'm glad I sent that e-mail blast from Ravi's account. 306 00:15:57,657 --> 00:15:59,329 What are we gonna do? 307 00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:02,392 Why don't we just throw Emma's Chase Logan hat on that mop? 308 00:16:02,392 --> 00:16:03,693 They have the same amount of talent. 309 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:09,639 (GASPS) I just had the most brilliant idea! 310 00:16:09,639 --> 00:16:11,671 Whatever it is, leave me out of it. 311 00:16:12,642 --> 00:16:14,274 And I'm in it. 312 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,646 (SQUEALING) 313 00:16:18,078 --> 00:16:21,211 Hey, hey, hey! Keep your oily, teenage hands off of Mr. Logan! 314 00:16:22,352 --> 00:16:24,554 I get 10 percent of the take, 315 00:16:24,554 --> 00:16:27,517 or I let these girls rip your lips off and keep 'em as souvenirs. 316 00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,491 Okay, I'm gonna read the script 317 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,693 while we film your hands using the Kitchen Dragon. Got it? 318 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:36,496 I can also add some of my own stuff. Improv a little. 319 00:16:37,627 --> 00:16:39,629 Or not. Good collaboratin' with ya. 320 00:16:39,629 --> 00:16:40,670 (BUZZER RINGING) 321 00:16:41,671 --> 00:16:44,574 Take one! And action! 322 00:16:45,535 --> 00:16:47,607 "Presenting the all new Kitchen Dragon! 323 00:16:48,178 --> 00:16:50,280 The only appliance you'll ever need!" 324 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:53,012 We don't want to see your face. We hired your hands. 325 00:16:56,246 --> 00:16:59,549 "Simply twist the dragon's neck to turn it on." 326 00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,551 (WHIRRING) 327 00:17:02,592 --> 00:17:05,555 "It slices and dices!" And tickles. 328 00:17:18,068 --> 00:17:19,739 Any chance I can cut something square? I... 329 00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:23,173 (BUZZER RINGING) 330 00:17:23,173 --> 00:17:24,614 Why aren't you using both hands? 331 00:17:24,614 --> 00:17:28,578 Because it's so easy to use, I only need one! 332 00:17:30,580 --> 00:17:32,222 More chopping, less talking. 333 00:17:32,222 --> 00:17:33,683 (BUZZER RINGING) 334 00:17:37,087 --> 00:17:39,559 "And it's the safest kitchen appliance you'll ever use." 335 00:17:42,192 --> 00:17:44,534 No, no, no! No, no, no! No! Uh... 336 00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:54,774 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Ow, ow! Ow! 337 00:17:56,846 --> 00:17:59,379 Whoa, this is heavy! Whoa, this thing is intense! 338 00:18:05,355 --> 00:18:07,257 (WHIRRING) 339 00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:11,521 Cut! (BUZZER RINGING) 340 00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:15,325 (CLEARS THROAT) Any notes on the scene? 341 00:18:18,168 --> 00:18:20,500 Yes! You're fired! 342 00:18:21,171 --> 00:18:22,572 Any other notes? 343 00:18:23,573 --> 00:18:27,177 Oh, uh... Oh, but, uh, we're still gonna get paid, right? 344 00:18:27,437 --> 00:18:28,778 Please? If I don't give my mom 345 00:18:28,778 --> 00:18:31,681 some cash, then she's gonna give the basement back to the dog. 346 00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:37,447 Is this a bad time to ask you 347 00:18:37,447 --> 00:18:39,519 if you can reimburse me for the manicure I had to get? 348 00:18:41,351 --> 00:18:42,752 Can I at least have one of those steaks? 349 00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:49,659 Jessie! Amazing news! 350 00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:51,461 The clients aren't happy 351 00:18:51,461 --> 00:18:54,304 you pointed out some fatal design flaws in their product, 352 00:18:54,304 --> 00:18:56,706 but they think you're really pretty. 353 00:18:56,706 --> 00:18:58,908 And they want you to star in the Kitchen Dragon safety video! 354 00:18:58,908 --> 00:19:00,210 Sold separately. 355 00:19:01,271 --> 00:19:03,213 That's great! Will they use my face? 356 00:19:03,213 --> 00:19:06,276 Yes! As long as you don't stick it in a bucket of paint. 357 00:19:06,276 --> 00:19:07,917 I can't make any promises. 358 00:19:08,518 --> 00:19:09,679 You don't know my kids. 359 00:19:11,521 --> 00:19:13,483 Hey! Hey, stay back! 360 00:19:13,483 --> 00:19:15,555 This thing is packed with dust mites! 361 00:19:18,328 --> 00:19:19,659 People, please! 362 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:22,432 Despite the fact that he's on every talk show, 363 00:19:22,432 --> 00:19:23,893 shot a documentary about himself, 364 00:19:23,893 --> 00:19:26,366 and posts selfies all over the Internet, 365 00:19:26,366 --> 00:19:28,398 Chase is a very private person. 366 00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:32,902 We can't hold back these Logan lovers forever! 367 00:19:32,902 --> 00:19:34,844 They want Chase Logan, 368 00:19:34,844 --> 00:19:36,546 I'll give 'em Chase Logan. 369 00:19:36,806 --> 00:19:38,548 (ALL SCREAMING) 370 00:20:03,973 --> 00:20:05,635 Yes! Killed it! 371 00:20:07,537 --> 00:20:08,608 Uh-oh. 372 00:20:14,584 --> 00:20:17,247 Okay, this is what we have been training for: 373 00:20:17,247 --> 00:20:19,489 an angry mob of popular kids! 374 00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:22,552 Fly, my pretties! Fly! 375 00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:30,400 I got a feeling Ravi's pigeons are about to make it rain! 376 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,832 Ka-kaw! Ka-kaw! 377 00:20:33,433 --> 00:20:34,834 (SCREAMING) 378 00:20:39,969 --> 00:20:41,711 No refunds! 379 00:20:41,711 --> 00:20:46,416 And any items left here overnight become property of the establishment! 380 00:20:48,718 --> 00:20:50,520 Ravi, you saved us! 381 00:20:51,481 --> 00:20:54,454 Well done, Bradley Pooper and James Vanderbeak. 382 00:20:55,985 --> 00:20:58,528 Well, I'd say our party was a big success. 383 00:20:58,528 --> 00:21:00,660 We made a ton of money and we got out clean. 384 00:21:01,591 --> 00:21:04,634 I'm gonna need a word with Bradley Pooper. 385 00:21:09,599 --> 00:21:11,671 So, according to Mrs. Chesterfield, 386 00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:14,474 you had a pigeon poop party on the roof? 387 00:21:15,675 --> 00:21:17,807 To be fair, that was not our original theme. 388 00:21:19,609 --> 00:21:21,451 The truth is, none of us sold our muffins, 389 00:21:21,451 --> 00:21:23,313 so we threw a party to raise the money! 390 00:21:23,683 --> 00:21:25,715 What? So you did lie about the muffins! 391 00:21:25,915 --> 00:21:28,057 She didn't know about that! 392 00:21:28,057 --> 00:21:29,789 Way to go, blabbermouth. 393 00:21:32,592 --> 00:21:36,025 Forgive me. My mouth is as incontinent as my pigeons. 394 00:21:36,726 --> 00:21:38,328 Okay, that's it! 395 00:21:38,328 --> 00:21:41,030 No more TV or Internet for the rest of your lives. 396 00:21:41,671 --> 00:21:44,574 And your grandkids have lost their jetpack privileges! 397 00:21:45,605 --> 00:21:48,608 Yours, too. (HUFFS) Yeah, like I'm gonna have kids! 398 00:21:49,679 --> 00:21:51,511 Well, what you're all going to do 399 00:21:51,511 --> 00:21:52,942 is go up and clean that roof. 400 00:21:52,942 --> 00:21:54,544 You can't make us! 401 00:21:54,544 --> 00:21:55,985 Oh, yeah? 402 00:21:56,416 --> 00:21:58,688 I got a Kitchen Dragon here and I'm not afraid to use it. 403 00:21:58,688 --> 00:22:00,550 Okay, okay! We're cleaning, we're cleaning! 404 00:22:03,493 --> 00:22:04,694 (LAUGHING) 405 00:22:04,694 --> 00:22:06,496 It is the only appliance I'll ever need. 406 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:13,933 So, just sign here, and your Kitchen Dragon contracts will be official. 407 00:22:14,704 --> 00:22:16,666 Make sure you read the fine print. 408 00:22:16,666 --> 00:22:19,469 This butler gig was only supposed to be a summer job. 409 00:22:22,972 --> 00:22:25,575 So I guess this is it, huh? 410 00:22:26,416 --> 00:22:29,649 Now that you're big-time, you'll probably need a whole-body agent. 411 00:22:31,120 --> 00:22:32,722 I'm gonna miss you. 412 00:22:32,722 --> 00:22:34,353 You were the best client I ever had. 413 00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:35,685 I only had one job. 414 00:22:35,685 --> 00:22:37,557 That's one more than my other clients have! 415 00:22:38,628 --> 00:22:41,761 The truth is, I'm not a very good agent. 416 00:22:42,061 --> 00:22:43,563 At least that's what my mom keeps saying. 417 00:22:44,834 --> 00:22:48,968 Wait! Max, you're a great agent. 418 00:22:49,699 --> 00:22:51,641 You believed in me when no one else did. 419 00:22:51,641 --> 00:22:53,743 And she means no one else. 420 00:22:53,743 --> 00:22:55,505 Nobody. Zilch. 421 00:22:55,505 --> 00:22:57,647 Zero-point-zero people. Yeah, we get it! 422 00:23:00,580 --> 00:23:04,854 Look, you got me my first commercial, you fought for me. 423 00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:07,417 So if you want to represent me, 424 00:23:07,417 --> 00:23:10,420 from head to toe, I would love for you to be my agent. 425 00:23:10,590 --> 00:23:11,621 Really? Mmm-hmm. 426 00:23:11,621 --> 00:23:13,162 That's awesome! Okay! All right. 427 00:23:14,794 --> 00:23:16,696 Oh! You guys wouldn't happen to have an unused 428 00:23:16,696 --> 00:23:18,498 office-shaped room available... 429 00:23:18,498 --> 00:23:20,399 No! No more people! 430 00:23:21,070 --> 00:23:22,572 That finger! 431 00:23:22,572 --> 00:23:24,003 It's so commanding! 432 00:23:24,003 --> 00:23:26,135 Shave that knuckle hair and I can make you a star, kid! 433 00:23:26,736 --> 00:23:29,839 Really? You mean I'd never have to wash another dish?