This programme contains strong language and adult themes
Be accountable!
Just tell her the truth and we can all get on with our lives.
There was a little kiss.
Oh!
What is your situation with Lauren?
We had an adult sleepover.
She can't keep her bloody hands off me.
He's obsessed with me.
Our story wasn't finished in London.
Our story?
I've had a great trip with you, Lauren.
Jaz and I literally just decided we're going to go on a date.
Listen, Freddy, I feel weird dating someone younger than me.
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you as well, bro.
Look, I'm going back to Sydney for a few weeks and I just met you.
Hugo and Isabella, you look quite cute in the corner.
I am happy at the moment.
So when you sent me this long paragraph saying,
"You mean a lot to me", OK, that gives a girl hope.
Who does more of the wedding planning here?
Me. Let's be honest, it's Maeva's wedding, really. Yeah.
Maeva's wedding featuring James.
Yeah, on the invite. Come here, baby, want to kiss me?
No.
What's going on? I can't do it, Sam.
Nothing bums me out more than a girl getting treated badly by a boy.
I know there's a lot of love there between him and I.
I don't think you should entertain it any more.
I want to show you how much I love you.
Oh, my God!
Want to spill some tea, Ruby? With what? You two have kissed?
He was my boyfriend of ten years, Bella,
I do not owe you an explanation.
I've had the best time out here with you
and its honestly been, like, life-changing.
Love you.
You were kissing me days after you were kissing her.
I shouldn't be dragged into this mess!
It's annoying that you're very cute.
I feel really awkward!
You know I fancy you, that's pretty obvious right?
Please don't say I said anything.
I only ever wanted to marry YOU.
I'm going to get really sad.
We were never in something to end.
I'm not a mug, I don't need to be with a man that's a cheater.
This is so bad, I don't know how you're not having a freak-out.
What happened?!
I'm worried for our future if it's starting like this.
SONG: Millionaires by The Snuts
Come here, boy. Yes! Hello. Mm, yep, love you, boy.
James, what are you doing?
Baby, I'm telling everyone how happily married I am.
We're supposed to be on our honeymoon right now,
not in Chelsea. Isn't that your brother over there?
Oi, you absolute melons, what are you doing?!
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Freddie says it's the fastest way to get around.
No, I've got a car that says otherwise.
I know a short cut, don't worry.
Should we get married in there?
One thing at a time, sweetie.
Dog. Dog.
Marriage. Marriage.
Babies. Babies.
Wait, this is so cute. This one, how much? Add to basket.
Such a good boy.
Official dog dad.
God, it suits you, fatherhood.
Happy couple. Thank you. Very happy couple. Yeah.
You guys both looked stunning on the day, I have to say.
Yeah, you both looked amazing.
And Jack, he... Nailed it. ..nailed his speech.
My brother? Incredible speech.
Emotional. He is actually on his way, he's going to join us.
Three Taylors at the table - we're outnumbered.
We are outnumbered.
Hi, guys. Hi, guys, sorry we're late.
Freddy was staring at himself in the mirror for about an hour, so.
You were watching, so.
Is there a blossoming romance going on between the two of you?
Yeah. Well, I think so. We met in the summer.
Actually, through James.
Sorry!
We had a little summer fling.
Listen, this man is the closest thing to a boyfriend while being
a friend. I love this guy.
Aww, sweet. Freddy, how did you enjoy the wedding?
You should've been my plus one, I'm sorry.
That's fine. Jack brought a girl, didn't he.
Jack did bring a girl. Did you? Yes, a best friend.
I've sort of noticed this. Jack only has female friends.
Freddy doesn't understand the concept of girl mates.
I just think, it's just fake. You both want to sleep with each other.
I was going to give you props, actually,
because you have been seeing Jaz, who's your friend.
Problem is, she doesn't want to sleep with you
and you want to sleep with her so... That's true, yeah,
that is a problem that I have that I've overcome right?
She's a friend. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, a friend
I would want to go there with.
Obviously, look at her, she's gorgeous.
She likes a man with a chiselled jawline, I will say that.
Hugo, he's obviously good looking but he treats her like...
He was an arsehole.
How's everything with you?
Yeah, I'm good. I am good.
Nice.
Last time I saw you was obviously at the wedding.
Yeah. And I saw you...
Saw me what?
You know what I'm about to say. Quite close.
With Reza? With Rez, yeah.
I didn't leave things in Sydney on the best note
with Rez, but since coming back,
we have spoken and seen each other, we're cool.
We're good, we're great friends.
So, nothing happened at the wedding with Rez, right?
Yeah, that's... I thought we were being honest?
I am being honest. No, nothing happened.
We sometimes drink and we get close.
Yeah, but friendly kisses are fine.
Friendly kisses are fine.
Oh, OK.
I'm just trying to figure myself out.
Figure out what I want, who I want, what I want.
I am wanting to get married, like, I am looking.
You know, kind of do just want to move forward
with my life, if I'm honest. I'm here to find a husband.
Um... Anyone on that table over there?
I shouldn't be saying this, actually, should I,
because Rez will get pissed off.
We have a pink number. Oh, wait, let me see this!
I think it's beautiful. It's a strong option, I think.
I am so excited to experience a Lauren Sintes birthday.
I do love a birthday, I'm not going to lie.
The attention's on you, what's bad about that? I have invited Hugo.
Aww. That's nice. Yeah.
We're on good terms. Yeah. We just agreed to be friends.
OK. So, what's going on in your love life?
Can I be honest? Not much. It's a little, like,
frustrating because it feels like with Tristan,
we do one step forward, two steps back.
I got some messages from him where
he's like, "I just feel like we're not in
"the same headspace, I really like you,
"it's becoming a problem for me."
And I'm like, "Wait, wait, wait. Like, I thought we were good?"
The reaction felt a little 0-100, like, very intense. Mm.
You know, and it is sad because, you know,
I did see potential in Tristan and I and...
I did, too. ..I'm a little bit unsure now.
Just, like, for your birthday I got you a yacht and for mine,
you got me, like, a bad attitude.
MUSIC: Fantasneeze by Bombay Bicycle Club
I think you need to put the collar a bit down.
Have you ever worn one before?
When I was, like,
12 my mum used to dress me in polo necks.
You need to send her a picture of what I'm wearing today.
Should I take a picture quick now? Yeah.
Smile, say "First day at school". Hi, mum.
Also like the fact we're matching.
I know, I didn't plan it or anything.
It's good that I have a girlfriend and stylist all in one, you know?
It's great. I know, it's great.
I was trying to get a haircut yesterday and you're like,
"No, no haircut." No, I like the hair longer. You like it longer.
But hey, do what you want. Ah, OK, yeah.
So guess who's birthday is coming up. Who's? Lauren.
Oh, Lauren, how is she?
I think she's great. I haven't caught up with her yet.
Yeah. She always has lovely things
to say about our relationship, am I right?
Well, she didn't have great things to say about us but
I don't think anyone did. She didn't have very nice things
to say about your boyfriend, sweetie. Yeah, but, sweetie,
I didn't have a nice thing to say about you then either.
I've seen her bad sides. OK...
I've seen her busy kind of princess vibes - not a fan.
I do like her. I like her in small, little, tiny doses.
So what, you don't want to celebrate her birthday?
Oh, believe me, I'll be at her birthday, absolutely.
MUSIC: My Golden Years by The Lemon Twigs
He's a good boy, though. Yeah, he's a good boy.
Got any tricks for us?
Weird that you let a dog lick your face, isn't it?
Also, you do know puppies eat their poo?
So you've just had poo in your mouth. Surely not.
Yeah, they do.
No kisses for me.
Can we all talk about the fact Maeva got married?
I'm, look I'm happy for them. Look,
they finally did what they wanted to do from the beginning, so...
I'm surprised you didn't burst through the doors, like...
"I object." .."Speak now or forever hold your peace."
Ah, that would've been brilliant. I thought about it.
Oh, my God, no, can you imagine? Oh, my God.
Think how much Mile's life has changed in the last six months.
You left me, you go to Sydney.
You got the Bondi boys, which, by the way...
Yeah, who else is in this clan? ..involves Sam Prince.
Sammy P. What the hell has happened to you, mate?
We're going to have to do something about that tattoo, by the way.
Ems, have you seen this? Oh, what have you done now?
I'm a Bondi boy.
WE are the Bondi boys.
Does everyone have the tattoo?
We do not need bad tattoos to be a friendship group.
LAUGHTER Whoa! Hey. There it is.
It's a representation of my time in Sydney
and a little memoir for myself. OK.
Temp's just fully absorbed the Australian culture.
I saw you do a shoey. You did many shoeys.
Don't do it now. No, no, no, no. Come on, surely.
Miles, look, you might of grown up, but I definitely haven't.
Ew, no, no, no.
Miles is too grown up for this stuff now.
He's like, "Yeah, I love single life,
"I'm so happy being single."
All right, I did it better in Australia.
Want some? Give me it.
Oh, my God, what the hell?
Thank you. Cheers.
Enjoy the wet sock.
As much as I'd love to stay here and chat,
I've got dinner with the Bondi boys.
Which I am one of, so see you, guys.
Love you, Ems. See you, guys. Bye, boys. Enjoy.
I'm sorry, Bondi boys?
Yeah, interesting new phase Temps is in.
I know. The shoe-y? Lovely stuff.
Yeah, did he make a lot of effort with you when he was out in Sydney?
Because, I'm not going to lie,
the girls didn't make too much of an effort with me.
Did they not?
No check-ins, no nothing?
Yas checked in once, and it got to that many weeks that
I just messaged Ruby in the end. Yeah.
You know, I'm very much with Jordan and living quite an adult life,
I guess. And, like, Ruby's single now and,
like, well, I actually haven't even caught up with her.
Like, I don't really know what's going on with her.
So, I guess that's probably part of it.
I don't think it's anything to worry about.
I think it's more just, you know, they've just been away all together
and they're having a lot of fun and they're just,
you know, still on that high.
True. Let's hope so anyway.
Tristan, Lauren?
Who? Oh, yeah.
I think you know, Lauren and I have a lot of fun together, she's great.
And I think we're emotionally in different places now.
I think I put my cards on the table.
I kind of made it clear how I felt and what I wanted,
and I don't think that was necessarily how she feels.
Basically, what I said to her is "I can't keep sleeping with you
"because I will get feelings" and I have started to get them.
It's... Lauren's birthday's coming up. It is, yeah.
Are you gonna get her a gift?
Uh, that's a good question.
Why don't you get her a sieve?
A what? A sieve. A sieve?
It's actually a colander. I would get slapped.
Yes, that's what I had for Christmas from James.
No way. Two tiers, though. Nice.
Two-tier sieve so she can, so she can... James, that's...
So I can steam fucking vegetables for our son.
So, married life is not like... We love each other,
we're super happy to be married with each other,
but after the wedding, you go back to your life. Yeah.
And then it's the same thing. This is where people have a honeymoon
and we still haven't had ours.
You know what he said to me the other day?
"You haven't touched me in a month." Yes.
James said, "I haven't touched you in a month"? Yeah.
That's not a thing. Maybe you should try with Maeva.
Yeah, I tried. I get batted off.
So, what we're saying is, we need a honeymoon,
and we need to touch each other more.
Yeah. Good.
I'm tired, I'm dead. I'm fucking dead.
I'm not thinking about your desire and your...your emotions.
So you're saying sleep equals sex.
So, if I get you more sleep, I get more sex. Yes.
Good. Deal. Done.
Anyway, marriage is good otherwise.
Other than that, it's going well!
Oh, so lads, we're about to introduce a new cocktail to the menu,
so I want you guys to critique.
What is it? It's a Lagerita.
Margarita meets Lager. The perfect hybrid.
Le joue, mon frere. Cheers. You guys gonna cheers?
You guys gonna have a little cheers? There we go.
Yeah, cut through that!
No, no, taste test, taste test.
Yeah, let me know what you think. Pass?
It's like a Long Island from the dark side.
Signed off.
It hit my tooth. Open wide.
How cute is this? Here you go.
Cheers. Cheers.
Guys, cheers.
To staying in! I feel like it's the new going out.
Baby, water, hydration,
because date night equals...
Date night equals champagne, not water.
No, but hydration for later.
For what?
Date night equals...
Mm.
..Maeva and James time.
You need to chill out, OK?
Do you remember when we used to go to clubs
and we used to go back together?
Now, we give a bottle to a baby every night.
Do you not reminisce?
Of course. Yeah, lots of... I want to feel, I want to feel...
Sexy? Yeah, again.
I'm open to explore more of our fantasies.
I don't have any fantasies. You do!
Have a good night's sleep. That's my fantasy.
OK, and then being woken up. The butler? I can dress up... No.
No? Breakfast in bed?
No. Followed by dessert. No?
No. Just woke up.
Just me and you in a sauna.
Oh, it's so hot, and sticky.
Yeah, sweaty.
Ugh.
You hate me right now.
We need to also figure other things out before...
Before anything like that.
OK. I need help. I need a nanny.
Well, this is what, yeah...
And I need help from you as well.
It's not just a nanny, it's not all that.
You want more sex, right?
Stop talking to me about the fucking dishwasher or
the washing machine, like, if I do something,
"She bring this in the bin."
"Oh, she put plastic in the bin."
"Oh, that's not good." Always things like that.
Excuse me if in bed I want to sleep.
We've got an account, haven't we? If not, Tris you're paying, right?
You owe me for Sydney.
I must say, it's quite nice as a foursome to have a little drink.
It's good of you to hang out with the boys. Yeah!
You can fall out and then actually get back together.
Look at us now, eh? Eh? Eh!
You and Lauren are looking pretty sweet. Not!
Lauren and I... I can't read this girl.
It's so...it's so confusing.
If I'm being perfectly honest with you, boys,
and I hate to say it,
I really just don't think Lauren's that into it with me. I agree.
I... Stop, don't be quick on the...
No, but Tristan I think you're the full package,
I think you're ready for the next step.
Lauren, on the other hand... Isn't that set.
..is so far away from that step,
and I find it very confusing that one minute she liked you,
the next minute she liked you.
Her actions speak louder than words,
and so far her actions are a shambles.
I think if you were the guy... I would know.
You would know by now and, and I love Lauren but...
I've got a gut sense... ..you'd know.
..and I don't get that.
You're in the Premier League, she's League One, I reckon.
Grassroots. She's, I think...
Let's...let's be respectful.
Do you think you could trust Lauren?
Probably not.
I just think that's a red flag.
Why's Emily actually not here?
So, I did actually invite Emily,
because obviously it's girls night, I haven't seen her in while,
but she said to me she wants to catch up one-on-one with me.
Oh. So, I think we'll have a coffee at some point but...
Yeah, it's a shame she's not here. Yeah.
You three are all single!
Yeah. Yeah.
What about Freddy? Are you guys just friends?
Everyone keeps asking me this. Do you guys text?
Yeah, we do text. We do... Other things?
No, we... BOTH: Send each other memes.
I wasn't expecting that!
At least it's not nudes.
There's...it's a friendship. It's a friendship. Yeah, yeah.
What's going on now with you and Tristan?
I'm genuinely a bit still confused.
We've not really spoken now.
I actually was with him yesterday. Were you?
Yes. Spill the tea.
I think he feels he wants more and maybe you don't.
He was like, "No, I'm looking for a girlfriend."
Yeah. I think he wants all of that with you.
Like, it's sweet hearing that, you know,
but why can't you just pick up the phone and say that, you know?
Kind of felt like he was sitting there, like, feeling a bit hurt.
He looked sad.
That makes me sad.
Do you feel like you could see yourself in a relationship with him?
I want to continue being back in that good space with him and dating,
and for me to really let someone in takes a lot,
and that's just how I'm built.
I would like to have this conversation with him
and explain that to him, and hopefully we can just like,
get back to like being on the same page and in a good place, you know?
What was it, 45 to go? 45 to win the game.
Oh... Five, double tops?
If he gets this, man... Five, double tops. He won't.
Five!
Oh, he needs the last one!
How on earth? As if he's done that. How? This boy, man.
And that is how you play darts.
Always. Thank you, goodnight.
Mate, do not worry about it,
this guy literally has decades on us.
So, do you come as a pair now? This is my boy.
We went for a brunch yesterday with the newlyweds.
It was nice. Interesting.
Who doesn't wanna hear about your brother's sex life?
And is it good? Uh, apparently not.
I actually felt bad for you a bit. I was just like, "Whoa."
Nah, I just wanted the floor to swallow me up a little bit.
Apparently Hugo's coming, isn't he?
Hugo is coming, yeah.
Why'd you have to invite Hugo, mate?
What's your beef with Hugo, anyway?
It's literally just the way that he treated Jazz,
strung her along,
kept reassuring her there was gonna be something there,
they can pick it back up.
I just feel like no one gave Hugo any shit
for what he did in Sydney.
I talk to Jazz every day, she's my friend.
And you're trying to take Jazz out, so I get it. Simp.
You think I can't get girls without fighting their corner?
Jazz actually said when we went on our friend date,
we went out for drinks,
she said she picked the wrong guy.
All I'm saying is he's not this charming,
lovely guy who lives in a romcom.
He's not - he's a dick.
I think he is. Say how it is, Freddy.
Anyway, enough of that, let's get back on the darts.
Come on, then. Is darts a sport?
Yeah! Of course, mate! Are you sure? Is it? It's not in the Olympics.
Yeah, you're just allowed a kebab after it. LAUGHTER
How we going, boys? Ah, put him off.
Tempy, you all right? How are you brother? Hey, Jack.
Yeah, good man. Good to see you. Hello. How you going, Freddy?
How we going? Who's winning?
Uh, who do you think? Don't talk about it.
This fucking kid.
I've got EXPERIENCE on my side. Yeah?
They like to call it age, but I say experience.
Anyway Hugo, how's the...? How's the modelling?
I heard you spoke to some agencies.
Yeah, I've been talking to a few. Spoke to my agency, didn't you?
Um, yeah, briefly.
I don't think they're gonna be the direction for me.
Maybe you should go for a smaller agency.
Oh, OK.
Because you think you're a better model or prettier than me?
I don't know what this angle is. No, no, no, nothing,
I just was wondering how your modelling was going.
Trust me, don't... Darts, anybody?
Yeah, back into it? Anybody wanna play darts?
Leave the big pond for the big fish. "Big pond for the big fish."
I don't understand.
I just think that the way that you went about treating Jazz
was a bit disrespectful.
And I've apologised to her, and I just don't feel like you're
someone else that I need to give an apology to.
I'm not saying that you should apologise to me.
I'm coming at you because you fucked up, Hugo.
Jazz has told me, one -
that she thought she picked the wrong guy,
two - that you've been extremely disrespectful to her.
She probably did.
She probably did, at the end of the day, because we didn't work.
And I wouldn't have treated her like shit. OK, sure, mate...
"Sure, mate"? I wouldn't have.
I'm starting to feel like this whole situation of you coming for me
right now is trying to be like a knight in shining armour.
It's not - it's just my moral compass is clearly a lot stronger than yours.
OK.
Mate, how are you and Ruby?
Me and Ruby? We're pretty good - I'm not gonna lie.
Are you guys friends?
What is the stance? What's the status quo?
I feel like... Are you friends or are you, like, trying to be more than that,
trying to figure it out?
Uh, I'm trying to figure it out myself, to be honest with you. I just love Roobs, man.
When I was at James and Maeva's wedding,
seeing you and Ruby together, there is so much love there.
I honestly do hope that you guys find each other again
and really make it work.
Could you see yourself marrying Ruby?
It's a deep question.
I could see myself marrying her, yeah, for sure.
So, I saw Ruby the other day
and James and Maeva asked her, like,
"Where are you at? What's going on with Rez?",
and she was like, "Yeah, you know, I love Rez, we get on so well."
And she was like, "I'm looking for, like...
"I want something more now, like, I want the family, I want the kids".
And I was like, "There's a bloke who wants to give that to you."
So she wants that and you obviously want that. Yeah.
I feel like if you don't make it abundantly clear what you want,
that opportunity, that future might slip.
Yeah, but I think we've never been in a position where
it's a clean slate and there's no, like...
But you ARE in that position now. Yeah, I know.
That's why I'm not gonna ruin it by being like, "I want to marry you!"
I think what Tristan is saying is
you'll regret it massively if you don't act
and some other guy swoops her off her feet.
I kind of just expect my husband to just ring my doorbell.
You haven't thought about giving it another go with you and Rez?
The answer to that is no.
Do you think he's holding out for it a little bit?
I don't know, I just...
I know we did it so many times for so many years... Yeah.
..and it never worked.
And ultimately, I think, sadly,
there is too much water under the bridge.
Am I going to get back with Rez
and have happily ever after with him?
I don't think so.
But every time I think of, like,
a wife or someone I would settle down with,
it's always kind of Ruby in that place.
You must get a vibe from her if she reciprocates your feelings, right?
I think we're in the same place.
So, this is the first time I've seen you since the wedding.
Yes, thank you, Maeva.
Still, congratulations - we don't have to speak about it anymore. Congratulations. Thanks.
I wasn't there, but congrats.
Perfect. Cheers.
Do you know who got me into peppermint tea? Cheers.
You.
What was it we used to have? Teapigs before bed.
So, what's new with you?
I went and caught up with Temps and Freddy
and your brother, Jack, the other day.
It was interesting.
Freddy came after me.
All right! Yes, Freddy!
He ended up getting really petty with the whole thing.
He started bringing up, like, modelling careers.
He's like, "Don't go for agencies that are as big as mine".
His words were,
"Don't try and swim with the big fish".
Oh, God!
So I was like, if he's gonna keep trying to have beef with me,
I will keep giving it back to the big fish.
What's it like being actually married?
Um...
We went on a date the other night
and I thought I'd get lucky at the end,
but all it did was turn into an argument.
Don't just go through the motions, you know?
Well, OK, the motions were her ripping me a new one.
She says, "James, I don't want to touch you because..." Ooh!
"Because I don't want to, because I'm angry at you
"because you haven't helped feed the baby".
To solve it, I'm gonna go see a few nannies
and I've set a few appointments up.
Also, because I don't want it snowballing into a problem -
sex therapist.
Ooh! I don't want to wave a red flag... Keep it all in-house.
..but you've only just got married, sunshine.
Yeah, it's been... Where are you going to be in ten years' time?
It's not a taboo subject anymore.
Get into this century.
It's fine - a nanny and a sex therapist.
OK, wow.
You must be doing all right.
LAUGHING: This sounds extortionate. It has its cost.
Guys, I'm running late.
I need to go and meet Maeva, OK? Duty calls. Good luck sir.
Good luck with the dry streak. Good luck.
The drought. LAUGHING: Yeah.
Sounds horrible out there.
One day it'll rain.
Hello. Hello, hello.
Good to see you. Good to see you.
Long time. Long time, babe.
Thanks for coming.
Thanks for inviting me down - and with a little tea. Of course.
Have some tea. Unexpected but nice.
But, yeah, I wanted to catch up with you, obviously, because...
Because we haven't spoken for a while. I know!
It's sad! Like, we left Sydney in such a nice...space.
How do you feel...now?
How do I feel? Yeah.
I don't know, it's tough,
cos I do feel a little bit vulnerable with you,
and it's not a feeling I love.
I think we're both kind of feeling the same way, and we're...
We've been brought to this place...differently.
The truth is I DO like you, Tristan.
You know I have a soft spot for you, you know?
I adore you and I like how we are together.
The math isn't mathing, you know - why we wouldn't be, like, vibing.
That's the... You know, I felt the same way
But would you see a future with me?
I'm at a point in my life where I'm not
going to date someone I don't see that way. Yeah.
Like, I know you would be a great boyfriend,
and I know you have all these amazing qualities.
I wouldn't, like, bother having gone through all these things
with you had I not thought that. Yeah.
As soon as I've seen you I'm like...
I was like, "Oh, I'm gonna let these feelings go",
and then obviously I feel like
a gooey little melt right now, so that's... Yeah.
Aw, babe, I missed you!
Aw! Can I give you a kiss?
BREATHLESSLY: Yeah.
Yes.
You're like, "Here I go again."
I was meant to be all tough and...
LAUREN LAUGHS ..I'm not.
I've got that idiot Sam Prince who I had drinks with the other day
being like, "Lauren's a red flag for me, I can't stand her".
Sam said I'm a red flag?
LAUGHING: Coming from THE red flag.
Not that his opinion matters to me whatsoever,
but he said he doesn't trust you.
I mean, I invited him to my party,
so say it to my face, honey.
I'm scared for him. I know exactly how that conversation goes.
Thank you, Hanan.
I think that's everything. Thank you so much.
We've got a few more interviews. Thank you.
MOUTHING: No.
I think he wasn't gonna do it Maeva's way.
But at the end of this, we need to get a nanny.
I agree... Yeah? ..but it's all about the trust.
At the end of the day, it's how you get on with the person,
the feeling, and if you're on the same page.
No matter what she did - if she's Mary Poppins, I don't care.
So, who have we got...? Hello. Hi, there!
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. James. Hello!
Natalie. Hello, there. Nice to meet you, Natalie. Nice to meet you.
I read your CV and it's all great.
Well, I have to say, it's super simple.
I just need to be saved right now because I am too tired.
You need you-time.
It's just that I have my routine and I want...
I want the nanny to understand my routine.
For me, it's like it's food and napping.
I kind of want to ask the questions that I'm interested in,
because I know you'll deal with all the details. Um, evenings...
Yep. ..late evenings - how does that work from your side? It's fine.
You're answering all the right answers.
I'll be honest with you,
one of the main reasons why we're looking for a nanny right now is
because mummy and daddy need alone time. She needs...
You need couple-time. Yes.
No, that's not the point. It's not that.
WHISPERS: It is the point.
It's not because of that, James! It's MY point.
You need to stop with this!
I feel like your outfits have really improved over the last few years.
I love it. I don't know whether to take that as a compliment or be offended.
What's happened to the nights drinking in Raffles?
I know, I've kind of just outgrown them, to be honest.
I do like the odd night out.
I've filled my cup up with vodka. I hope you don't mind.
Do you know what?
I think when I'm a mum, watching the kids play football,
I'm going to fill mine up with white wine. Hey, hey, friends!
Here he is. Hello! Have I been replaced for our coffee walks?
No, no, don't panic. You haven't, hence why you're here. You have.
I have. I'm here now.
You're just late, because you're too busy, you know...
Well, I've just been on the ice.
What is that? It's, uh, my skates. Oh.
Very hard skates to do shoeys in, by the way, I must admit.
You can't... The blade might get in your way.
I think the shoey days have to be done now.
Also you're sweating in them, so they probably stink.
It's not a good look, is it?
Do you know what, you guys have actually -
jokes aside - got such a nice friendship.
Like, you're the cutest little duo ever. Yeah.
Maybe I need to take a leaf out of both your books.
What, find new friends? Because I've been feeling left out.
LAUGHING: I feel like my friends don't like me anymore.
I do feel you like to say,
"Oh, my friends are not reaching out to me",
but sometimes I do feel like you don't either.
No, but I have been. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I thought to myself, right,
because I do feel like I put in a lot of effort with the girls,
I thought, "Let's see if they ever message me",
just, like, as a little... Test. A bit, yeah.
Ruby didn't message me.
I had to message her about three weeks in.
I don't even know what's going on with her and Rez.
I don't know anything, and I just feel a bit left out.
I did actually get an invite to Ruby's little pamper evening.
There we go. Oh, nice. How was it?
Well, no, I didn't go, because it was...
Well, Emily...
But to be fair, she invited me, like, hours before,
literally hours, and I had already made plans.
It sounds like you and Ruby
need to have a chat in private with each other. Yeah.
I think just lay everything on the table.
I'll find out what the problem is.
Well, you know what the problem is. YOU'RE the problem.
YOU'RE the problem. Thanks, boys. MILES LAUGHS
Don't be defensive. I know how you can get.
What do you mean? Quick ans... Look at you - see?
I'm joking. No you're not. You're not joking.
LAUGHING: You're not joking.
Look at me when I'm talking to you.
I'm just trying to... I am trying to rack my brain.
Maybe because of the whole Rez stuff,
I feel like part of...
It's not part of my problem, because I'll never change.
Sometimes people don't tell me certain things in situations,
because they don't...
I'm too blunt sometimes and people don't like it. Yeah.
Do you like Rez?
Uh...define "like".
He makes my energies a bit off-kilter - that's it.
Do you think because she's been hanging around with Rez,
you've got an opinion on it?
No, I don't have an opinion on it, as such.
Listen...
MILES SNIGGERS So, what you want to say is,
"I DO have an opinion".
No. Yeah. You've seen the ups and downs of Rez and Ruby.
I don't mind them being friends.
Well, I don't actually understand them being friends.
Like, it's just being friends with an ex-boyfriend,
do you know what I mean? TEMPS SIGHS
So, what's new with you?
So, I think Emily's been catching up with some of the others.
I've not seen her myself recently.
I hosted a girl's night at mine, sort of pamper night,
and I said, "Come along, I'd love to see you, Yas would love to see you".
And she replied saying she couldn't come,
but she'd like to catch up with me sort of one-on-one,
but...it was a bit strange she didn't come, but...
Have you spoken to her much, through Sydney and stuff?
Not a huge amount. Why?
No, I'm just wondering.
I hope there's not a problem.
Why would there be a problem?
I don't know, there seems like there's a bit of a disconnect at the moment.
I met the boys the other day.
They were quizzing me about me and you.
Surprise, surprise. Surprise, surprise, baby!
Do you know what it is? They saw us kiss at the wedding. I know.
And they were like, "Ooh, wedding, kissing!"
And I was just... I was really pissed, you know?
You can't blame the booze! Joking, joking!
I would never blame the booze. You looked ravishing.
I did probably say something. I said...
They were like, "Could you see yourself ending up with her?"
And I was like, "You know, probably." RUBY WHIMPERS
No, I could see it!
Not, like, jumping the gun or anything.
And then they were like, "Listen, you know,
"you don't want someone else to come and sweep her off her feet."
And I was like, "Well, if that happens then, you know...
"..good on her."
Or equally, you know,
there could be someone in London who's super charismatic,
Persian,
moderately challenged in height but very funny.
You ARE very funny.
I wasn't talking about me, Ruby! Oh, sorry.
Oh, gosh!
What? Why are you looking at me like that?
I'm not deliberately.
I feel a bit nervous! No!
I feel like we're sort of plodding along and I'm waiting for something.
Yeah, but no, it's nice to hang out and not have,
like...to look over your shoulder and be like,
"Fuck, am I doing something wrong", or this, this, and that.
Do you know what I mean?
LIVELY DANCE MUSIC
You two - what the hell?! Yes. Yeah.
I didn't even know you were together.
You came to the wedding
and you didn't even tell us that you were with Yas.
I think, at your wedding day, I didn't...
I decided not to say, "Hey, I'm with Yas now."
You were busy dancing.
Now I feel even more guilty that I didn't invite you
to the wedding as a plus-one. No! Sorry for that.
No, honestly!
Anyway, at the end of the day, even if you had,
like, a past and, like, you know,
shit happened and that makes you stronger sometimes...
Exactly. ..so it's good. I mean, you are now married.
Well, yeah, and we went through hell... Yeah. ..so, you see?
It works. And you're happier than ever?
Yeah, it's...
Yeah, of course, of course.
God, you're not selling the marriage dream. No, I'm not.
I am NOT selling the marriage dream.
Your lovely husband was telling me that you're getting a nanny.
Yes, I hope that's gonna help us because we need more time together.
Also, James mentioned a sex therapist, as well.
What?! A what?
I think it was kind of just part of the... What did he say?
He was like, "We're looking for a nanny,
"but also we're looking for, like, a sex therapist".
QUIETLY: What?
It's the first time that I hear this sex therapist thing,
and to me it's like... It's the first time you've heard it? James hasn't mentioned it to you?!
He never mentioned to me that we needed... Oh!
James never mentioned to me that we needed a sex therapist.
I'm so sorry...and I don't want to be involved.
Are you annoyed at me?
No, I'm annoyed at him.
OK, please don't say I said anything, please.
SNIGGERING: They're married. Please.
Of course, you know I'll tell him.
But don't say it was me. Say it was another guy.
But he knows it was you. Who else was at the pub? Hugo - blame it on Hugo.
So he told Hugo we need a sex therapist?! YAS LAUGHS
Oh, God.
It's a big thing to say. Like, you don't say those things.
We just got married, OK? I'm just tired.
You don't mention sex therapist.
It's like, it's embarrassing for me.
I would be so angry.
So I expect to see you on the dance floor. I WILL be on the dance floor.
I'll be popping and locking - don't you worry. No, don't. Oh, yeah.
Oh, the big fish!
Good to see you, mate. Hello. Hi.
Hello. How we doing? If it isn't Chelsea's next top model.
Oh, he's still coming at it. Nice to see you again.
I love this. Yeah, good to see you, bro.
I love so much that you have my back... No worries.
..but, like, what I've heard is
there was some, like, modelling comments.
Obviously you're both here now. Let's talk about it.
Oh, come on, it's a bit of chat.
If you're trying to, like, impress Jazz with coming for me, like,
I just don't think that's the angle.
I wasn't doing it because I fancy Jazz.
I think we could have a friendship, but, like, mate,
if you're gonna keep on wanting to talk shit about me, that's not gonna fucking happen.
I'll stop talking shit about you if you don't give me a reason to.
I won't give you any reasons to if you don't dig up things that are solved in the past.
Yeah, yeah, just... In the future, just behave yourself.
Emily's here. I can just sense an energy.
For sure.
I'm just intrigued at what...she wants to talk about.
Oh, a shot. Perfect.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
Hello, hello! Hey!
Hey, happy birthday! Cheers.
# Happy birthday to you... #
Aw, how are you guys? Good, how are you? I'm so good.
Are you having a fun birthday? I am. Thank you for coming. Thank you for having us.
I must say, this is a great party. Yeah. Thank you.
The drinks, the shots - very good.
So, I did want to unpack some things with you.
Tristan... I love unpacking - please.
Tristan mentioned to me that you told him, like,
I was a red flag and untrustworthy.
Like, I don't understand what I've done
to you to kind of get this behaviour.
Yeah, I did say that.
I could see he wasn't very happy and I just,
I think there's a massive difference, obviously,
with you two.
Like, hey, he likes gardening, you like Gucci,
and I just, I couldn't see those... YAS LAUGHS
I couldn't see those collaborating, really.
Tristan seems to be, like, ready for marriage.
Obviously, from what I see,
I think you're probably not in that headspace.
I just don't know how we go from, like, rekindling in Sydney
to marriage, you know, in such a short amount of time.
Not marriage! Hey, not marriage but, like... Call me crazy - I need more time.
That's why I have had these strong opinions. I said a few other things.
But listen...
What did you say? What else did you say?
HE HEMS AND HAWS
I mean, I said... I don't want there to be, like, whispers, you know?
What did you say?
I said that Tristan's like Premier League
and you're like League One, but you're still pro.
I don't even know what that means. It's just like...
Like, still pros... Sorry, where do you get these analogies?!
What does that mean in English? It basically just means, like,
Tristan's kind of ready and you're just, like, not so ready.
That sounds like you're saying Tristan's better.
No, no, full commitment, and then there's, like, less commitment.
That's what it is. Oh, OK, I was about to fight you.
Listen.. God, you're good at wangling yourself out of things.
Hey, I just want to own it.
I apologise. I want to move forward.
I can hear you squirming from here. Tristan! Oh!
Oh, wow! Happy birthday. Surprise! Surprise!
Sam did say this analogy that I didn't really understand.
Do you mind explaining it?
Oh, did you...? Yeah.
The Premier League... Premier League, League One thing. It was like... What does that mean?
See, I'm not a football person, but I imagine it would be comparing...
..me as a real designer bag, and you as a fake designer handbag.
Wow! That is... That's not... That's harsh.
Is that not, like....? No, I really don't...
My analogy was... Listen, I'm just... I mean, laughable, first of all.
You know, I don't love that.
Listen, you guys seem happy,
so maybe focus on your business
and stay out of mine...yeah?
Deal. Think we made a deal. All right, I'm gonna go and enjoy my party.
Enjoy. Happy birthday. All right, yeah?
LIVELY DANCE MUSIC
Hold this, yeah? Oh, are you doing my bow tie?
Yes, yeah. OK. Come here. Head up.
Are these the famous parties that you've... They are.
..spoken about so highly?
They are. You stay later, the more debaucherous it gets. Oh, yeah.
Look at that. Yeah?
Yeah, but just don't... It's meant to be messy.
No, just don't look in the mirror.
Not once have I ever done something right by you. Take that off.
Looks so shit.
It looks better like that anyway.
Here she is - beautiful wife. Hello. Hey, baby girl!
Mm-mm-mm.
I just spoke to Sam... Mm-hm.
..and Yas,
and they told me you spoke to Sam
saying that you wanted to see a sex therapist.
Yeah, yeah...because I think it will help us.
We're open to trying everything
and anything to help our relationship.
But you don't talk about this to everyone here.
We just got married.
You know what, I'm not going to lie to you, James, when people come to me
and they're like, "How's married life?", it's shit.
But that's embarrassing for me to hear,
for you to tell everyone, because it's not just shit.
But it's the truth.
No, you're tired. It's not shit.
Yeah, but you see, you put the blame on me.
Let me say my piece. We're going to get a nanny, that's going to make you less tired.
I know that. And we're going to go talk to a sex therapist,
because I think, for our relationship, it's a good thing to do.
I don't WANT to go to a sex therapist. But Maeva, what's the problem?
I don't want to go to a sex therapist. You think it's a taboo subject but it's fine.
It is...
We've done role play before, we've done many things before.
What's the problem with that? Can you stop doing that?
Jack, Maeva and I make love.
You need to really stop being like this.
You really need to stop being like this. What's the problem?
It's so irritating. I'm warning him.
All the time, just because you don't have enough sex in your life,
you have to act like a, like a.... SHE IMITATES DOG PANTING
Stop. I hate this.
I've got this for 50 years.
Oh, you don't need to. You don't need to.
You know divorce? No. Have you heard about it?
We are ending this conversation,
I am not going to see a sex therapist. OK, you watch.
It's embarrassing. It's...
Me, me, me...
Maeva, yes. ..going to see a sex therapist?
The only thing I'm asking is to sleep a little bit. That's it.
I find you so attractive right now.
Cheers. This is so nice. Well, more champagne.
Not as much as James and Maeva's wedding, though.
Do you remember me, like, driving in Beau's car?
No, no, no. Why did I think that was a good idea?
The car is built for nought to two.
So maybe at our wedding, we have a few of those.
Our wedding? Is that what you said?
Hello. Hey, Emily. You look lovely. Hi!
Old school. Are you well?
Old school?
Would you mind if I spoke to Ruby?
Not at all, I'll get us a drink. See you later.
I've missed you. I've missed you too!
I just kind of wanted to communicate to you
because I've been told I need to start communicating,
and I just feel a little bit left out.
I just feel like I haven't...really spoken to you too much,
seen you loads.
The last thing I want to do is for you to feel left out.
It is a two-way street,
and I think I could definitely pick up the phone more.
I don't think this needs to be, sort of...
I don't think this is necessarily, like,
all my fault, that maybe we've not spoken as much.
I don't think that's all on me.
I feel very shut off from you,
in the sense that I don't even know what's going on. Like, I don't know what's going on with Rez,
I don't know what's going on with anything.
In terms of Rez and I, there's nothing romantic going on.
He's been there for me, that is done.
We're not ever getting back together or anything but...
Yeah, no, I just keep hearing, like, random things about you and Rez,
like, snogging at James and Maeva's wedding
and things like that, and I'm like, "She has not told me any of this."
Well, I guess I've not seen you.
Were you snogging at their wedding?
We were hammered and had a kiss.
LAUGHING: Christ.
You can't be... You can't kiss your friends.
I guess. Does it matter?
Not really. I'm just...saying.
Kiss who I want.
Yeah, yes, you can. It's up to you, obviously,
but I don't want you to feel like, as well,
you can't tell me certain things.
But then you've just said, "You can't kiss your friends",
so it's like, why would I then tell you? No, I know.
I'm just getting quite defensive energy from you.
Because you seem so frosty with me. Frosty?!
Yeah, I don't really understand what the problem is.
You're giving me, like, you just don't...that you don't care.
Well, I do care.
I'm a bit confused
and maybe that's translating into, "I don't care."
Is that it?
I don't... Yeah, I don't really have anything...
I don't really know what else to say. OK.
Don't worry about it, then.
I have such a lovely,
good-looking boy in front of me, who wants to be with me.
I have got feelings for you. Sorry, I'm gonna get really sad.
Don't. I'm just, like, terrified to go into a relationship with someone.
I feel like I would wanna date someone athletic,
a little bit older than me. Older.
See, I've just ticked all those boxes, haven't I?
Just don't hurt her. That's it.
That's not a thing at all you should be saying to me.
I had a weird call from one of my mates, and he went,
"Is that Sam Prince still with Yas?"
What happened?!
I was so hammered and I went back to the house.
Whose? I don't know her name, Yasmine!
We were NOT in a good place. We weren't together.
But no one knew that. I'm not a mug.
I don't need to be with a man that's a cheater.
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