1
00:00:02,602 --> 00:00:04,136
- I'm not here
to make friends.
2
00:00:04,138 --> 00:00:05,437
- I ain't gonna make
one friend.
3
00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:08,507
- I'm just here to win.
I'm not here to make friends.
4
00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:10,576
- Okay.
5
00:00:10,578 --> 00:00:11,410
- No.
6
00:00:11,412 --> 00:00:12,745
You're here to make friends.
7
00:00:12,747 --> 00:00:14,780
Making friends
is the name of this show.
8
00:00:14,782 --> 00:00:19,752
- ♪ you and me forever
9
00:00:19,754 --> 00:00:22,187
- Okay, I got to look out
for number one.
10
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:23,322
- Okay, that's not true.
11
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:24,823
You would lose if you look out
for number one.
12
00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:26,658
- Hey, look, dude,
that's your opinion.
13
00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:30,763
- Does anybody know
what we're doing here?
14
00:00:32,399 --> 00:00:34,099
- I locked down plans,
chicks, guys.
15
00:00:34,101 --> 00:00:37,202
You know, I didn't even know
this was a competition.
16
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:38,937
Just saw a sign
for making friends
17
00:00:38,939 --> 00:00:39,838
And thought that would
be cool.
18
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,207
- You see, this would be
a good time to make a friend.
19
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:44,109
- I'm jeff, by the way.
Jeff.
20
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,344
- How are you?
- Oh.
21
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:46,345
- Jeff.
Hey.
22
00:00:46,347 --> 00:00:47,146
Jeff.
How are you?
23
00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:48,714
- If anyone will be friends
with jeff,
24
00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:50,115
They will--
they will win a point.
25
00:00:50,117 --> 00:00:52,117
- I'll make an alliance
with jeff.
26
00:00:52,119 --> 00:00:52,551
- Great.
27
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:53,585
- But I will stab him
in the back.
28
00:00:53,587 --> 00:00:56,055
- That's your prerogative.
Either way, we had a friendship.
29
00:00:56,057 --> 00:00:58,924
- Does anyone go
for a light lunch with jeff?
30
00:00:58,926 --> 00:00:59,625
- Chicken salad.
31
00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:03,095
- This network will give you
1 million cash dollars.
32
00:01:03,097 --> 00:01:06,465
A lot of nos.
- Yeah, what about taxes?
33
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:08,400
- I'll pay 'em.
34
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:09,568
Look, let me just say,
you know,
35
00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:12,704
Even though
I got voted off first,
36
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:16,075
I feel like I made friends
for a lifetime.
37
00:01:16,077 --> 00:01:22,815
- ♪ you and me forever
- [whistling]
38
00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:26,518
[dubstep music]
39
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:34,827
♪
40
00:01:37,063 --> 00:01:39,131
- Here's my impression of you.
- Mm-hmm.
41
00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:41,500
- John mulaney's
a really good friend of mine.
42
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:43,402
- [laughs]
43
00:01:43,404 --> 00:01:44,536
Not bad.
- Yeah.
44
00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:46,905
Comedy central picked us up
for another season.
45
00:01:46,907 --> 00:01:47,706
- [laughs]
46
00:01:47,708 --> 00:01:52,478
You have the monotone
underlying nasal thing that I--
47
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:53,378
- Yeah.
- I think I do, right?
48
00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:55,414
- And I'm capturing
some of that casual disdain.
49
00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:59,017
You're watching kroll show.
- Yeah, 'cause I do that.
50
00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:01,420
I do, "you're watching
kroll show,"
51
00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:03,021
As if I were the host--
52
00:02:03,023 --> 00:02:03,589
- [laughing]
53
00:02:03,591 --> 00:02:06,859
- As if I were the host
of some basic cable talk show.
54
00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:08,694
- I'm nash rickey.
55
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:10,696
I feel grateful and blessed
by my lord and savior,
56
00:02:10,698 --> 00:02:12,464
Jesus christ,
to be hitting the road
57
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:14,666
With my sound man
and sober buddy, jonesy,
58
00:02:14,668 --> 00:02:18,203
As we reunite my band,
sloppysecondz...
59
00:02:18,205 --> 00:02:21,340
♪ l.A. Deli
60
00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:23,275
And also find love.
61
00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:25,010
Sponsored by the good people
at stamps,
62
00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:27,813
The rock stars
of the postal industry.
63
00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:31,884
♪ deli
64
00:02:31,886 --> 00:02:35,988
- This is...
65
00:02:35,990 --> 00:02:38,357
I haven't seen
original bass man stud cardoni
66
00:02:38,359 --> 00:02:42,828
Since our band fell apart
due to my own personal demons.
67
00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:45,364
I couldn't handle
the moderate success
68
00:02:45,366 --> 00:02:47,266
Of our party hit l.A. Deli.
69
00:02:47,268 --> 00:02:49,968
♪ l.A. Deli
70
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:52,104
I'm going to find him.
71
00:02:52,106 --> 00:02:55,908
So it's 6:00 in the morning.
We got here a few hours early.
72
00:02:55,910 --> 00:02:57,109
Ever since I got sober,
73
00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:58,510
Time management
is an issue for me.
74
00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,812
Well, this was ill-timed,
wasn't it, jonesy?
75
00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:03,782
These are the struggles
that I face every day...
76
00:03:03,784 --> 00:03:04,650
That I try to overcome.
77
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:07,719
With god on my side
and my good friend, jonesy,
78
00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:09,988
Anything is possible.
79
00:03:09,990 --> 00:03:11,156
But it's still
very frustrating.
80
00:03:11,158 --> 00:03:13,125
- Wait, so a guy asked me
to go on a date on Saturday.
81
00:03:13,127 --> 00:03:14,893
I was wondering if I could go.
- Who is this guy?
82
00:03:14,895 --> 00:03:16,562
- His name's robert.
- Hey, whoa! What?
83
00:03:16,564 --> 00:03:20,532
- Well, well, well,
if it isn't stud cardoni.
84
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,801
♪ l.A. Deli
85
00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:25,837
- Nash, I go by anthony now,
okay?
86
00:03:25,839 --> 00:03:29,274
And I don't have any money
to give you, all right, so--
87
00:03:29,276 --> 00:03:30,676
- I don't need your money,
friend.
88
00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:32,344
Didn't you get
my stamped letter?
89
00:03:32,346 --> 00:03:34,546
I'm getting sloppysecondz
back together.
90
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:37,716
- No, it's Tuesday, and I have
to take my daughter to school,
91
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,750
And then I'm going to work.
92
00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:40,752
- The only work you have to do
is to slap the bass
93
00:03:40,754 --> 00:03:43,522
In the best g-damn band
in the world.
94
00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:44,423
♪ deli
95
00:03:44,425 --> 00:03:46,191
I have to make amends
for a lot of things.
96
00:03:46,193 --> 00:03:48,961
I'm sober now, and I ask
for your forgiveness.
97
00:03:48,963 --> 00:03:51,330
- Nash, your van is blocking
my driveway.
98
00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:52,331
So I'm sorry.
99
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:53,899
- Let me give your daughter
a ride to school,
100
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:55,701
And we can talk
on the way.
101
00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:58,837
♪ shotgun!
102
00:03:58,839 --> 00:03:59,338
Yeah!
103
00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:01,873
I had no intention
of dropping her off at school.
104
00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:04,209
My boy stud cardoni was in.
105
00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:06,144
Next stop, venice beach.
106
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:09,781
♪ l.A. Deli
107
00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,788
- Wow. A couple grade-15ers
playing discus.
108
00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:19,658
We really must be visiting
universities in the states, eh?
109
00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:23,128
- I never thought I'd have high
enough marks to study abroad,
110
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:24,062
In michigan, no less.
111
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,597
- You've got
to be joshing me, toons.
112
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:27,299
You're a fantastic student.
113
00:04:27,301 --> 00:04:28,233
- Aw, thanks, mikey.
114
00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:30,902
- Now where is the cabinet
of admittance?
115
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:33,939
Oh, that's right.
We're in the states.
116
00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:35,974
The admissions "ar-fice."
117
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:36,742
- [laughter]
118
00:04:36,744 --> 00:04:37,876
- But honestly,
we shouldn't joke
119
00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:39,344
About our warlike neighbors
from the south.
120
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:44,182
They've been wonderful partners
to us.
121
00:04:49,722 --> 00:04:50,455
[school bell rings]
122
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:51,590
- Thanks for your interest
in our school.
123
00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:54,259
You know, hopefully an overnight
on campus'll help you figure out
124
00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:55,761
Whether we're a match
for you or not.
125
00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:58,430
You'll be staying
with two of our undergrads
126
00:04:58,432 --> 00:04:59,598
In their dorm rooms.
127
00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:00,699
- What's a dorm room?
128
00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:01,967
- Oh, it's where
the students sleep.
129
00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:04,469
- Oh, a room share.
- Oh, I like that. Ha.
130
00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:06,805
And you'll maybe eat meals
with them in the dining hall.
131
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:10,008
- That's the cafetorium.
- Cafetor--I like that.
132
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,844
And, you know, and hopefully,
having some fun, right?
133
00:05:12,846 --> 00:05:14,513
- And how much
does the government pay you
134
00:05:14,515 --> 00:05:15,247
To go to university?
135
00:05:15,249 --> 00:05:17,182
- Uh, actually, you pay us.
Um--
136
00:05:17,184 --> 00:05:20,786
- Well, why would you have
to pay money to be educated?
137
00:05:20,788 --> 00:05:21,853
- Oh, I like that. Ha.
138
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:25,257
Oh, your hosts have arrived
fashionably late.
139
00:05:25,259 --> 00:05:27,759
Mikey, you're gonna be going
over with spencer
140
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:28,660
To durnbull hall.
141
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:32,597
- Swim team housing.
Think you can float?
142
00:05:32,599 --> 00:05:33,465
- M'kay.
143
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:35,467
- [scoffs]
m'kay?
144
00:05:35,469 --> 00:05:39,604
- And toons, you're gonna be
staying in pathos hall
145
00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:40,172
With becca.
146
00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:42,274
It's a dorm for handicapped
single moms.
147
00:05:42,276 --> 00:05:43,375
It's just the two of you.
148
00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:45,410
- I'm blind.
- Cool.
149
00:05:45,412 --> 00:05:47,612
- Anyway, back to getting
acquainted, right?
150
00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:49,948
- Yeah, lets go get
some blister-ritas, pal.
151
00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:53,752
Mi casa el su--
dudes! Dudes, relax!
152
00:05:53,754 --> 00:05:57,022
We got a guest, a prospy,
staying the night.
153
00:05:57,024 --> 00:06:01,860
- I'm mikey, but all my friends
at home call me legs.
154
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:02,327
- Legs.
155
00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:04,863
What, are you on the track team
or something?
156
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:05,931
- Oh, no, no.
157
00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:06,631
Canada cancelled track
158
00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:09,434
After ben johnson shamed
our country by cheating.
159
00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:11,036
[laughter]
160
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:15,040
- I guess we're not used
to your canadian comedy.
161
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:18,043
- I get it, I guess.
162
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:19,911
[babies crying]
163
00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:21,947
- Mackerel, triplets.
164
00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:24,416
Three times the blessing.
165
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:27,753
- Yeah,
at three times the cost.
166
00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:28,854
- I admire your strength.
167
00:06:28,856 --> 00:06:31,256
I thought blind people
wore glasses.
168
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:31,823
- Oh.
169
00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:35,627
Well, my blindness was
a preexisting condition,
170
00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:39,598
So my insurance
doesn't cover it.
171
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:42,134
I had to buy the cane myself.
172
00:06:42,136 --> 00:06:44,169
- Peace out.
173
00:06:44,171 --> 00:06:44,870
[school bell rings]
174
00:06:44,872 --> 00:06:48,006
- So how are you enjoying
your time here so far?
175
00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:48,840
- Oh, it's quite cool.
176
00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:51,510
It's different
than our cafetorium, though.
177
00:06:51,512 --> 00:06:52,010
Oh, hello.
178
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:54,279
Can I have a soft boil with
the back bacon on brown bread,
179
00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:58,250
A sack of ketchup chips,
and, uh, a bag of homo milk?
180
00:06:58,252 --> 00:06:59,951
- [laughs]
homo milk?
181
00:06:59,953 --> 00:07:01,486
- Yeah, 3% homogenized milk.
182
00:07:01,488 --> 00:07:04,723
- So just get him
some regular milk, manny.
183
00:07:04,725 --> 00:07:06,057
- Sorry.
Sorry.
184
00:07:06,059 --> 00:07:08,293
- It's all right.
Manny'll take care of you.
185
00:07:08,295 --> 00:07:10,262
- You keep your milk in bags?
186
00:07:10,264 --> 00:07:13,064
- Yeah.
Well, how would you store it?
187
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:16,034
- Why don't you put 'em
in cartons?
188
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:17,402
- Because we keep it in a bag.
189
00:07:17,404 --> 00:07:19,104
- You can't keep milk in a bag.
190
00:07:19,106 --> 00:07:21,072
- Oh, hey, toons.
Where's becca?
191
00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:22,307
- Oh, she couldn't make it.
192
00:07:22,309 --> 00:07:23,775
Nursing for three takes hours.
193
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,343
- Oh, my.
- Mind if I join you?
194
00:07:25,345 --> 00:07:28,680
- Yeah.
- Actually, this table's full.
195
00:07:28,682 --> 00:07:33,351
I'm sure you'll find a good
parking spot, toon-buggy.
196
00:07:33,353 --> 00:07:36,021
- Toon-buggy?
197
00:07:37,857 --> 00:07:42,394
- Yeah, you dodo bird.
198
00:07:42,396 --> 00:07:43,695
- Hey, darren!
199
00:07:43,697 --> 00:07:46,965
They got the baked ones.
200
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,633
- [laughs]
201
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:51,036
Sorry, toons.
202
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:58,877
- This is...
203
00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:03,114
[delicate piano music]
204
00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:11,289
♪
205
00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:24,736
- We drove down to venice beach
to find drummer spit decreaux,
206
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:26,938
One of the true
wild men of rock.
207
00:08:26,940 --> 00:08:30,108
['80s metal]
208
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:37,148
♪
209
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:38,717
Sick stick spit decreaux.
210
00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:41,052
- Crack attack is back, jack.
211
00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:45,023
- ♪ l.A. Deli
212
00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:45,690
- [laughs]
213
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:49,227
- You have no idea who I am.
- No idea, friend.
214
00:08:49,229 --> 00:08:50,495
- It's nash rickey.
215
00:08:50,497 --> 00:08:53,765
♪ l.A. Deli
216
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:57,369
- Whoa.
I guess you are nash rickey.
217
00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:57,769
[laughs]
218
00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:00,305
- So spit, you selling stuffed
animals at the beach now?
219
00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:02,107
- No, I'm hanging out
at the beach
220
00:09:02,109 --> 00:09:03,542
With some
of my best friends.
221
00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:05,877
Purple whale,
little dinosaur,
222
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:06,578
Lawrence of a-baby-a.
223
00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:08,380
- Look, spit,
I don't have a lot of time.
224
00:09:08,382 --> 00:09:10,081
We're getting
a rock n' reunion going.
225
00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:12,951
I'm gettin' all of sloppysecondz
back together.
226
00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:13,618
I need you in.
227
00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,720
- Oh, I don't know, man.
That ship has sailed.
228
00:09:15,722 --> 00:09:18,056
- I've been trying to get
in touch with you.
229
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,024
Didn't you get my letter?
230
00:09:19,026 --> 00:09:21,459
- No, I don't have an address.
Did you email it?
231
00:09:21,461 --> 00:09:22,561
- No, I don't use email.
232
00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:25,430
Spam filters,
invalid 404 errors,
233
00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:28,466
No confirmation that somebody's
received your note.
234
00:09:28,468 --> 00:09:31,536
I like the personal touch
of a handwritten letter.
235
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:32,837
The font is your own.
236
00:09:32,839 --> 00:09:35,907
Nothing can beat a stamp
and a letter.
237
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,742
- The United States postal
service is obsolete,
238
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,778
Nash rickey,
everybody knows it.
239
00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,080
- You're speaking nonsense,
spit.
240
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,048
- That's possible.
241
00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:44,716
I fried my brain
on crack cocaine.
242
00:09:44,718 --> 00:09:45,984
- Those days are behind us.
243
00:09:45,986 --> 00:09:48,787
So I got to know, spit decreaux,
are you in?
244
00:09:52,191 --> 00:09:53,858
I'll take that as a yes.
245
00:09:53,860 --> 00:09:54,593
- Ha.
246
00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:56,895
- Spit was in,
and I was two for two.
247
00:09:56,897 --> 00:09:59,497
Next stop, san diego.
248
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,867
- One of the loveliest guys.
- Oh.
249
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:04,069
- Um--
- thanks, jonathan.
250
00:10:04,071 --> 00:10:08,039
- The nicest guys working
hollywood are key and peele.
251
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:11,242
- Welcome back
to upper peninsula state
252
00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:11,910
Closed circuit tv.
253
00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:15,046
From time to time, we wire guys
on the court, refs on the court,
254
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:17,816
Just to hear what's going on
behind the scenes.
255
00:10:17,818 --> 00:10:18,617
Check it out.
256
00:10:18,619 --> 00:10:19,551
- Hey.
- Hey, how are you?
257
00:10:19,553 --> 00:10:20,819
- How's it going, man?
Nice to meet you.
258
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,988
- I'm jeff.
- Yeah, rondy, man.
259
00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:23,521
Rondy, man.
260
00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:25,590
- Just washed my hands,
was just in the bathroom.
261
00:10:25,592 --> 00:10:26,758
It's gonna be fun today.
- All right.
262
00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:27,993
- All right.
- All right, get ready.
263
00:10:27,995 --> 00:10:28,994
[air horn]
all right, ladies.
264
00:10:28,996 --> 00:10:30,662
Shake 'em.
Don't break 'em.
265
00:10:30,664 --> 00:10:31,296
Keep it clean.
266
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:33,298
- I usually, uh--
I usually do the tipoff.
267
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:34,766
- I want to do it.
I'm gonna do it.
268
00:10:34,768 --> 00:10:36,067
- Okay.
[whistle blows]
269
00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:37,936
- All right, here we go.
270
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,871
Here we go.
Here we go.
271
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:42,073
[whistles]
that's charge!
272
00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:43,041
Not.
- That's a block.
273
00:10:43,043 --> 00:10:44,409
- That's a charge.
- No, that's a block.
274
00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:45,744
- That's what a charge--
- no, that's a block.
275
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:47,278
- Hey, man, that's a charge.
- No, that's a block.
276
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:48,713
- Hey, what--that's--
that's a charge.
277
00:10:48,715 --> 00:10:50,749
- No, that's a block.
- Do what you did.
278
00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:51,483
Both: Do what you did.
279
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:53,318
- No, she--
that's--that's--no.
280
00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:54,619
But that's not what happened.
281
00:10:54,621 --> 00:10:55,320
[air horn]
- foul.
282
00:10:55,322 --> 00:10:56,588
- Oh, okay, okay.
I got it, I got it, I got it.
283
00:10:56,590 --> 00:10:58,056
I got it. Stay down.
Sit down, sit down, sit down.
284
00:10:58,058 --> 00:10:59,157
Sit down.
- You're all right.
285
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:00,258
- I got--I got it.
- You can get up.
286
00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:01,326
She can get up.
- I got it, stay down.
287
00:11:01,328 --> 00:11:02,894
- She wants to get up.
Let her get up.
288
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,029
- Okay.
Let's get some ice.
289
00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:04,963
Let's get some ice for her!
290
00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:06,731
- See, your problem is
you're coming in way too hot.
291
00:11:06,733 --> 00:11:08,867
They don't like that.
You got to come in subtle.
292
00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:10,468
You want to--
- what are you talking about?
293
00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:11,803
You talking about
hookin' up with girls.
294
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:14,539
- Hey, man.
Hey, you said it, I didn't.
295
00:11:14,541 --> 00:11:15,173
You pick one girl.
296
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:17,709
You give her the attention,
that's the way.
297
00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:18,910
- You know who I like?
- Which one?
298
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:20,111
- 15.
- 15? That's your girl.
299
00:11:20,113 --> 00:11:22,080
- Yeah.
- See, I knew, you dirty dog.
300
00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,214
I knew you were gonna
like one of 'em.
301
00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,383
- Nah, come on, man.
- 15, I saw that was your girl.
302
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:26,584
Eh, eh.
[whistles]
303
00:11:26,586 --> 00:11:27,118
Foul on 15.
304
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,020
- What are you doing, man?
- Save her, save her.
305
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,589
- No way that's a foul on 15.
No, no.
306
00:11:31,591 --> 00:11:32,857
[whistles]
take that back.
307
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,059
- Hey, man.
- Take that back.
308
00:11:34,061 --> 00:11:35,560
- I said it's a foul.
You sure?
309
00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:36,294
- Yeah, I'm sure.
310
00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:37,962
- All right, man.
Whatever you say.
311
00:11:37,964 --> 00:11:39,097
- Okay,
that's not a foul on 15.
312
00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:41,132
You're still in the game,
sweetheart.
313
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,867
- Trust me.
Trust me.
314
00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:45,303
That's gonna pay off
in dividends.
315
00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:46,771
[both snickering]
316
00:11:46,773 --> 00:11:47,439
[air horn]
317
00:11:47,441 --> 00:11:49,808
I'd give him a shot.
I'd give him a shot.
318
00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:51,276
That's all I'm saying.
319
00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:52,877
I did what I could.
Did what I could.
320
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:54,779
- What's your favorite
m. Night shyamalan movie?
321
00:11:54,781 --> 00:11:56,481
- Signs.
- No question.
322
00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:56,915
- Yeah.
323
00:11:56,917 --> 00:12:00,618
- Looks like he's got
a yellow doody on his head.
324
00:12:00,620 --> 00:12:02,053
- [laughs]
325
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:04,155
I've been thinking that
for a while now.
326
00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:06,991
- Yeah, but I--as I said,
I call it like I see it.
327
00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:09,027
Hey, doody head,
get off the court.
328
00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:13,331
- [laughing]
329
00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:15,834
[coughing]
330
00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:17,335
- All right.
[air horn]
331
00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:18,903
[whistles]
that's the game.
332
00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:19,738
That's it.
333
00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:21,139
- Sometimes what you hear
on the court
334
00:12:21,141 --> 00:12:23,174
Can be surprisingly
uplifting.
335
00:12:23,176 --> 00:12:24,943
That's it for today.
336
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:27,645
Uh, remember it's amnesty week
at the library,
337
00:12:27,647 --> 00:12:28,813
So get those books
back there.
338
00:12:28,815 --> 00:12:30,949
- I whip out eye of the tiger
by survivor.
339
00:12:30,951 --> 00:12:33,451
- Not if I get there first.
340
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:38,123
- ♪ you and me forever
341
00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:41,025
- Were you any good
at basketball?
342
00:12:41,027 --> 00:12:41,760
- No.
343
00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,027
- Did you fell pressure
as a black dude
344
00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:43,995
To be good
at basketball?
345
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:47,732
- No, because everyone else
that was good
346
00:12:47,734 --> 00:12:49,834
Was just blacker
than me anyway.
347
00:12:49,836 --> 00:12:52,437
I had a very justified reason
to not be good.
348
00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:53,538
- Really?
- My mom's white.
349
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:54,873
You know that, right?
- No [bleep].
350
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,876
- You didn't know that?
- That's why you wear glasses.
351
00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,878
[laughter]
352
00:13:02,181 --> 00:13:06,151
- This is...
353
00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:09,487
[delicate piano music]
354
00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:13,291
♪
355
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:17,162
- Our trip all over southern
california brought us
356
00:13:17,164 --> 00:13:17,796
To san diego.
357
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:20,865
We had to pay our respects
to our beloved keyboardist,
358
00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:22,667
James st. James.
359
00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:27,639
He lived too hard,
but he will never be forgotten.
360
00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:29,908
♪ l.A. Deli
361
00:13:29,910 --> 00:13:32,310
I never meant
for sloppysecondz...
362
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:36,648
To be a dictatorship.
363
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:41,986
Return to sender,
you goddamned saint.
364
00:13:43,856 --> 00:13:48,092
James was in, but I haven't had
much luck finding love so far.
365
00:13:48,094 --> 00:13:51,229
Dillon, I wanted to talk to you
real quick and let you know
366
00:13:51,231 --> 00:13:53,164
That even though
there's clearly an attraction,
367
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,632
We can never be
together physically.
368
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:56,634
- Ew, gross.
You're old.
369
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:57,869
- And I know that's attractive
to young women,
370
00:13:57,871 --> 00:14:00,238
But we're not
on sammy hagar's cigarette boat.
371
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:02,006
- Can I please go
to school now?
372
00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:02,774
- Hey, uh, nash.
- Yeah?
373
00:14:02,776 --> 00:14:05,310
- You're not trying to do what
I think you're trying to do,
374
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:06,110
Are you?
375
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:07,712
- No, those days are gone.
376
00:14:07,714 --> 00:14:09,180
But she is a siren.
377
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:09,781
- [chuckles]
378
00:14:09,783 --> 00:14:11,282
Thank you.
She is attractive.
379
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:11,916
You hear that?
380
00:14:11,918 --> 00:14:13,418
He thinks you're pretty,
sweetie.
381
00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:16,588
['80s metal]
382
00:14:16,590 --> 00:14:17,188
♪
383
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:21,659
- Um, I'd like to give
a shout out to, uh,
384
00:14:21,661 --> 00:14:23,261
Cigarette looking
one-hitters.
385
00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:25,730
- Okay.
- It's like a james bond gadget.
386
00:14:25,732 --> 00:14:26,130
- Yeah.
387
00:14:26,132 --> 00:14:28,499
Oh, cops don't notice the
clinking noise of the cigarette.
388
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:29,167
- [laughs]
389
00:14:29,169 --> 00:14:31,002
Yeah, or the fact
that I'm lighting it once
390
00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:33,204
And then blowing out
a huge plume of smoke
391
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,473
And then putting
the cigarette into my pocket.
392
00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:37,842
- And then continuing to drive
with your knees.
393
00:14:37,844 --> 00:14:38,376
- Yeah.
394
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,577
Or that I've pulled out
my cigarette
395
00:14:39,579 --> 00:14:41,379
From what appears
to be a wooden container.
396
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:42,914
- [laughter]
397
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,754
[phone dialing]
398
00:14:49,756 --> 00:14:52,423
- Now connecting
your international call.
399
00:14:52,425 --> 00:14:54,492
[phone ringing]
400
00:14:54,494 --> 00:14:59,664
- [playing saxophone]
401
00:14:59,666 --> 00:15:01,499
Hey, it's coach teacher.
Thanks for phonin'.
402
00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:03,301
You're aware of the process.
[beep]
403
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:04,969
- Hey, it's me, toons.
404
00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:07,505
Pardon the bother,
but I hate it in the states.
405
00:15:07,507 --> 00:15:11,309
Mikey's changed,
and there's no help for mothers.
406
00:15:14,947 --> 00:15:17,815
I love you.
[beep]
407
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:21,686
- I love you too.
408
00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:24,022
- The guys all have music lit
till 5:00.
409
00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:25,657
Finally some peace and quiet
around here, huh?
410
00:15:25,659 --> 00:15:28,893
- Yeah, I can't believe how much
I ate at that midday supper.
411
00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:32,330
I feel like I understand
the freshman one stone now.
412
00:15:32,332 --> 00:15:34,265
[laughs]
- gettin' kinda tired.
413
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:36,501
Want to take a nap?
I could use one.
414
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:37,035
- Oh, okay.
415
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:39,404
Maybe I'll read from your
textbook about jazz music.
416
00:15:39,406 --> 00:15:42,740
I wonder which chapter's
about michael buble.
417
00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:43,474
- Sure.
418
00:15:43,476 --> 00:15:44,609
Or, you know, no big deal
419
00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:49,047
If you wanted to...
Lie down over here.
420
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:50,949
Come on.
Fold in.
421
00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:51,849
- [chuckles]
422
00:15:51,851 --> 00:15:53,751
[shivers]
I am pretty knackered.
423
00:15:53,753 --> 00:15:57,055
I would love a nap.
424
00:15:57,057 --> 00:15:59,123
- Look at you.
425
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:02,827
Wow, pal.
You are tight.
426
00:16:02,829 --> 00:16:05,730
Try to relax, you know.
- Okay.
427
00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:07,865
- Loosen up.
- Okay.
428
00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:11,235
- Open yourself.
- Okay.
429
00:16:16,475 --> 00:16:19,243
Pardon.
Pardon.
430
00:16:19,245 --> 00:16:20,111
Pardon!
- What?
431
00:16:20,113 --> 00:16:21,412
- Whoa!
What was that about?
432
00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:22,146
- What was what about?
433
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:24,415
- You smooched me with an
open-faced montreal mouth kiss.
434
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:26,384
- Shh, shut your mouth,
homo milk.
435
00:16:26,386 --> 00:16:28,419
If you're not gay,
what's the deal?
436
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,221
- Pardon?
I don't follow.
437
00:16:30,223 --> 00:16:32,056
- The way you talk.
- Mm-hmm.
438
00:16:32,058 --> 00:16:33,458
- Your hair.
- My hair?
439
00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:34,058
- Your manners,
440
00:16:34,060 --> 00:16:38,196
The fact that your hoody
has holes for your thumb.
441
00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:39,130
You held the door for me.
442
00:16:39,132 --> 00:16:40,531
- I always try to be
a gentleman.
443
00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:42,500
- And the nine shades of purple
you're wearing.
444
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,836
- Oh, I understand.
I'm not gay.
445
00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:45,870
I'm canadian.
446
00:16:45,872 --> 00:16:48,406
- Oh, my god.
I'm gonna kill myself.
447
00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:49,407
- Hey, spencer,
448
00:16:49,409 --> 00:16:51,976
Being a homosexual
makes you unique and different.
449
00:16:51,978 --> 00:16:55,279
And in canada,
being gay is encouraged,
450
00:16:55,281 --> 00:16:56,381
Nothing to be ashamed of.
451
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:59,550
Some of my favorite people
are different...
452
00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:00,885
Like my friend toons.
453
00:17:00,887 --> 00:17:02,286
She's different.
[gasp]
454
00:17:02,288 --> 00:17:04,022
Aurora borealis, toons!
455
00:17:04,024 --> 00:17:05,490
- Don't tell anyone
about this,
456
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:08,026
Especially my boss
at hollister.
457
00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:09,193
- [baby crying]
458
00:17:09,195 --> 00:17:12,597
- Toons, toons, I want
to apologize for how I behaved.
459
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:14,899
- I don't care, mikey.
Just get me out of here.
460
00:17:14,901 --> 00:17:16,801
I hate it here.
- Of course.
461
00:17:16,803 --> 00:17:18,202
I'm sorry for how I treated you,
462
00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:21,072
And I'll never take you
for granted again.
463
00:17:21,074 --> 00:17:22,340
- Thanks, mikey.
464
00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:24,142
I can't wait to get back
to civilization,
465
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:26,210
Seeing how single mothers
with disabilities
466
00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:27,779
Are treated here
in the states.
467
00:17:27,781 --> 00:17:30,081
- Not to mention suicidal gay
athletes who are in grade 16.
468
00:17:30,083 --> 00:17:33,217
It really makes you appreciate
the social services that come
469
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:36,687
With the robust taxation
of the workforce, eh?
470
00:17:36,689 --> 00:17:37,688
- Eh.
471
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:40,058
- Let's go.
472
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:42,994
[triumphant music]
473
00:17:42,996 --> 00:17:46,164
- [distorted speech] bye.
474
00:18:06,485 --> 00:18:07,685
- Politicians are coming out
with, like,
475
00:18:07,687 --> 00:18:09,387
Uh, we're in favor
of gay marriage.
476
00:18:09,389 --> 00:18:13,925
We are--we want to support,
um, education or--
477
00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:16,928
This is the things they say
to get voters to vote for them.
478
00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:18,529
- Uh-huh.
- Go to mars.
479
00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:20,164
That's all I care about.
- [laughs]
480
00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:21,632
- If someone said,
"we can go to mars.
481
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:24,635
We can get a mission there."
space is the coolest thing.
482
00:18:24,637 --> 00:18:26,871
- Would you watch
a reality show in space?
483
00:18:26,873 --> 00:18:27,839
- Yes.
484
00:18:27,841 --> 00:18:31,876
- This is...
485
00:18:33,579 --> 00:18:34,579
Everyone else is back in.
486
00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:37,014
Now it's time for
the final piece of the puzzle,
487
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:40,585
But it's the man who eclipsed me
in my own band,
488
00:18:40,587 --> 00:18:43,488
Guitarist mikki lixxx.
489
00:18:44,923 --> 00:18:45,690
- 'sup?
490
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:47,258
- ♪ pastrami's piling high ♪
491
00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:48,693
♪ while you're coming down ♪
492
00:18:48,695 --> 00:18:51,162
- I should've never bitten
your fiancee's pinkie off,
493
00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:53,397
And for that, I'm sorry.
- Listen, nash.
494
00:18:53,399 --> 00:18:55,500
I'm kind of way too rich now
495
00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:57,835
Off of all my terrible music
to care.
496
00:18:57,837 --> 00:18:59,437
- I'm leaving now.
- No, sweetheart.
497
00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:03,074
We're close, okay?
Hey, this is important to daddy.
498
00:19:03,076 --> 00:19:04,809
- What can I do for you?
499
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:07,278
- Well, didn't you get
my stamped letter?
500
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,647
- No, I don--
I haven't opened a--
501
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,482
I haven't opened a letter
since 1990.
502
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:14,318
- The postal system
is one of the cornerstones
503
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:15,653
Of american communication.
504
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,588
People need
to check their mail.
505
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:20,191
- You know, I'm starting to feel
some energy here,
506
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:20,825
This, like, vibe.
507
00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:22,360
We haven't all been in a room
like this since--
508
00:19:22,362 --> 00:19:24,295
- Well, that's why I brought
all of you here.
509
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:27,932
- I mean, maybe I'm insane
to think that you can catch
510
00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:29,233
Lightning in a bottle twice,
511
00:19:29,235 --> 00:19:33,838
But if there is anyone who
can make lightning their bitch,
512
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,307
It's this gang
of [bleep] and balls.
513
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:38,709
[mimics explosion]
idea bomb.
514
00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:39,377
Let's reunite.
515
00:19:39,379 --> 00:19:41,712
All: Yes!
- That's what I've been saying.
516
00:19:41,714 --> 00:19:43,548
- I am 100% in, bro.
- Yes!
517
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:47,552
- ♪ I'm gonna ride
that winged beauty ♪
518
00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:51,622
All: ♪ my lover and my cutie
519
00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:57,762
♪ on home
520
00:19:57,764 --> 00:19:59,197
[growls]
521
00:19:59,199 --> 00:20:00,631
- I got to use your john.
522
00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:03,000
- ♪ feels like
it's over, girl ♪
523
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:05,770
♪ that's when I'll be ending
my war with you ♪
524
00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:08,906
- [exhales]
well, well, well, friend.
525
00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:11,275
Looks like it's just me and you,
nash rickey,
526
00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:12,877
And I'm not gonna be coy
with you.
527
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:15,947
I've abused your body,
your mind, and your spirit.
528
00:20:15,949 --> 00:20:17,949
But I need you to listen
to me right now.
529
00:20:17,951 --> 00:20:18,482
Listen good.
530
00:20:18,484 --> 00:20:20,418
I've gotten everybody
in this band back together,
531
00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:22,019
But it all comes down
to you.
532
00:20:22,021 --> 00:20:24,222
And I got one piece of advice
for you, nash.
533
00:20:24,224 --> 00:20:26,724
This isn't the best thing
for you.
534
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,059
You need to be on your own.
535
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:30,361
And I'm sorry to you, stamps.
536
00:20:30,363 --> 00:20:34,632
You've kept america connected
for over 150 years,
537
00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:36,133
And I've let you down.
538
00:20:36,135 --> 00:20:38,502
And for that,
I am divinely sorry.
539
00:20:38,504 --> 00:20:40,404
After some serious
soul searching,
540
00:20:40,406 --> 00:20:42,840
I realized
I could not participate
541
00:20:42,842 --> 00:20:46,444
In the reunion
of my own band.
542
00:20:46,446 --> 00:20:49,614
And though I didn't get the band
back together,
543
00:20:49,616 --> 00:20:50,514
I did find love.
544
00:20:50,516 --> 00:20:55,253
It came to my own front door
six days a week.
545
00:20:55,255 --> 00:20:57,121
- ♪ this heart's with you ♪
546
00:20:57,123 --> 00:21:01,158
- ♪ l.A. Deli
547
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:03,527
- Ha, ha.
548
00:21:06,164 --> 00:21:07,665
- ♪ l.A. Deli
549
00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:12,436
♪ where the after party's
ragin' in my l.A. Town ♪
550
00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:14,705
♪ l.A. Deli
551
00:21:14,707 --> 00:21:20,177
♪ the pastrami's pilin' high
while you're comin' down ♪