1
00:00:03,753 --> 00:00:06,339
Aw, look at my little cubs
of anarchy.

2
00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:08,383
Are you excited
about your new bike?

3
00:00:08,466 --> 00:00:09,342
Yes.

4
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:10,802
Here you go, buddy.

5
00:00:10,927 --> 00:00:12,262
What the [bleep] is that?

6
00:00:12,387 --> 00:00:14,097
I asked for a motorcycle.

7
00:00:14,222 --> 00:00:16,599
Malloy, we both know
you're not big enough.

8
00:00:16,725 --> 00:00:18,893
Besides, this is just as cool.

9
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:21,604
I'm a big boy.
I'm a big boy.

10
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,690
I am not getting on that thing.

11
00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:26,484
Not without your safety gear.

12
00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:29,154
I look ridiculous.
Everybody's gonna laugh at me.

13
00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:31,781
Malloy, no one's gonna laugh at you.

14
00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:33,033
[Laughter]

15
00:00:33,158 --> 00:00:34,367
That's it.

16
00:00:34,492 --> 00:00:35,618
I'm gonna go set up the kill room.

17
00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:38,121
Don't forget your outside helmet.

18
00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,915
Daddy's gotta protect
his little therapy pet.

19
00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:42,167
[All gasp]

20
00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:44,294
- You're alive?
- Yes. Why?

21
00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:47,005
Oh, when you were two hours
late, we assumed you were dead.

22
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:49,716
We even wrote your obituary.

23
00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:53,678
Steve Williams.
Lived, died, fat.

24
00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:54,637
That's it?

25
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,514
Why didn't you list
any of my accomplishments?

26
00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:58,099
Uh, we said fat.

27
00:00:58,308 --> 00:01:00,060
How about the fact that
I've been ranger of the month

28
00:01:00,143 --> 00:01:01,019
for years?

29
00:01:01,102 --> 00:01:02,604
Steve, it's about time
we told you

30
00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:04,022
that award is meaningless.

31
00:01:04,105 --> 00:01:07,484
Your medal is
a snapple cap we painted gold.

32
00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:08,777
Oh, my God.

33
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,653
I haven't done anything
with my life.

34
00:01:10,779 --> 00:01:12,697
When I'm dead,
no one will remember me.

35
00:01:12,822 --> 00:01:15,366
Nobody gives a shit, Steve.
I'm out of here.

36
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:16,868
Don't forget
your bubble armor.

37
00:01:17,118 --> 00:01:18,661
I can't breathe!

38
00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:20,205
[Chuckles]
Have fun, little buddy.

39
00:01:20,288 --> 00:01:21,498
Stay in the driveway.

40
00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:22,707
[Crash]

41
00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:31,800
♪ Brickleberry ♪

42
00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:36,805
What do you onto pick for your
stupid bedtime stories.

43
00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:39,849
"Once there was a man
with a big, yellow mustache,

44
00:01:39,974 --> 00:01:42,352
and he had a curious
little cubsy wubsy

45
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,729
who kept the man's
brain demons at bay.

46
00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:47,148
Without his cuddles,
the man would have to accept

47
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:48,358
That during the war,
he made a functioning piano

48
00:01:48,483 --> 00:01:51,736
Out of Iraqi teeth and dicks."

49
00:01:51,820 --> 00:01:52,821
The end.

50
00:01:52,904 --> 00:01:54,405
At least it wasn't
the Berenstain Bears.

51
00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:55,573
I hate those jews.

52
00:01:55,698 --> 00:01:58,701
P.S. daddy will not be here
to tuck you in tomorrow

53
00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,286
Cause he going to a strip club.

54
00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:01,871
The strip club?
I wanna go.

55
00:02:01,996 --> 00:02:03,414
Whoa, slow down.

56
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:04,499
You're too small.

57
00:02:04,582 --> 00:02:05,750
You say that about everything.

58
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:08,628
Is my cubsy afraid to
be home alone?

59
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:09,879
Don't worry.

60
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:12,257
Daddy has a babysitter
all lined up for you.

61
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,135
That always works out well.

62
00:02:15,260 --> 00:02:18,138
That's what I'd do for a Klondike bar.

63
00:02:19,222 --> 00:02:20,306
Hey, Steve.

64
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:21,558
Hey, what the hell are you doing?

65
00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:24,602
I realized I have
to make my mark in the world.

66
00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:27,147
if Reggie got famous for
making a sex tape with a horse,

67
00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:29,232
then so can I.

68
00:02:29,357 --> 00:02:31,526
Steve, that wasn't a horse.
That was Kim Kardashian.

69
00:02:31,609 --> 00:02:32,652
Ew!

70
00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:34,946
I'll figure out some other way
to make my mark.

71
00:02:35,071 --> 00:02:36,531
Hello, Guinness?

72
00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,116
I just broke a record.

73
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:40,952
I stuck 39 rolls of dimes up my ass.

74
00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:42,036
What?

75
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,413
Shia labeouf did 40?

76
00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:44,873
[Dimes hit the floor]
Damn it!

77
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,418
What's the big deal?

78
00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:50,753
It's called a fetish!

79
00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:53,173
[Crash]

80
00:02:53,756 --> 00:02:54,757
Eh, d-d-d-d.

81
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,426
Where do you think
you're going little bear?

82
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,511
Well man with the
accent I can't place.

83
00:02:58,636 --> 00:03:00,263
I am here to see the titties.

84
00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:01,389
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

85
00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:03,933
You must be at least
as tall as her c-section scar,

86
00:03:04,058 --> 00:03:05,977
or else you [bleep] off.

87
00:03:06,102 --> 00:03:07,645
But you are welcome to play

88
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:10,815
At Jorge's single mom
stripper daycare.

89
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,488
Hey, look, it's a wish machine.

90
00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:20,825
All right, Mr.
No fly list. Here goes.

91
00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:21,910
[Machine dings]

92
00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:23,536
[Mechanical breathing]

93
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:25,830
I wish I was big.

94
00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:30,501
[Mechanical breathing]

95
00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:35,131
Damn.

96
00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:37,926
See, this is why I don't
trust brown people.

97
00:03:38,134 --> 00:03:40,428
[Eerie music]

98
00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:44,849
[Humming and strumming]

99
00:03:44,974 --> 00:03:46,267
I don't know you played guitar.

100
00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:47,727
it's what I do when I'm sad.

101
00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:48,937
You're really good.

102
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,855
- Have you written any songs?
- A few.

103
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:53,733
I'd like to perform them but,
I'd be too embarrassed.

104
00:03:53,816 --> 00:03:54,734
Too embarrassed?

105
00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:57,570
Didn't you shove
$195 worth of dimes up your ass?

106
00:03:57,695 --> 00:04:00,531
Every time I fart,
it's like I hit triple 7s.

107
00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:01,950
Maybe your songs could
put you on the map.

108
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,868
I got some contacts.
I could get you a gig.

109
00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:06,204
Okay, but first, I gotta drop a deuce.

110
00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:07,580
We gotta find a coinstar.

111
00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,292
Morning, Malloy.

112
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:12,377
Good morning.

113
00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:13,503
What the [bleep]?

114
00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:15,046
What happened to you, Malloy?

115
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,131
Magic is real!

116
00:04:17,715 --> 00:04:18,758
All right, Steve.

117
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:21,094
I pull a lot of strings
to help get you this gig.

118
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:22,679
Hey, baby.

119
00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:25,431
It's my girlfriend's grandson's party,
so don't screw it up.

120
00:04:25,556 --> 00:04:27,183
Don't worry, the kids will love it.

121
00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:30,520
I'm doing a song, I wrote about guys
who work on a mountain.

122
00:04:30,645 --> 00:04:32,105
Alright.
Now go get 'em.

123
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:33,523
[Clears throat]

124
00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:38,569
♪ Mountain men
I love mountain men ♪

125
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:44,200
♪ Mountain Harry, Mountain Tom
and Mountain Ben ♪

126
00:04:44,325 --> 00:04:49,706
♪ Sharing a tent
with my favorite dudes ♪

127
00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:54,669
♪ I want to be mountin' men like you ♪

128
00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:58,047
♪ They're sweaty, hairy,
and hard as a rock ♪

129
00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,257
Steve, what the hell?

130
00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:00,466
You better play something else quick!

131
00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:01,676
Song for the kids.

132
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,636
Ooh, I've got a cute rooster song.

133
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,013
Do it!
Do it!

134
00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:08,474
♪ I'm in the barn,
I'm playing with my cock ♪

135
00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:11,769
♪ All the boys line up
to pet my cock ♪

136
00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:13,813
♪ He's thick, he's red,
he's got a big old head ♪

137
00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:15,606
♪ Why don't I just show you instead? ♪

138
00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:19,235
♪ Raise your hand
if you want to see my cock ♪

139
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:20,236
- Kill him!
- Let's get him!

140
00:05:20,361 --> 00:05:21,487
Run, Steve, run!

141
00:05:21,612 --> 00:05:22,488
What'd I say?

142
00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:24,282
What'd I say?

143
00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:25,700
They hate me.

144
00:05:25,783 --> 00:05:26,868
Why did they hate me?

145
00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,037
Steve, did you think
there was something...

146
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,288
Queer about those songs?

147
00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,248
I just write wholesome country songs.

148
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:33,416
See?

149
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:35,626
Farmhand jobs.

150
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:38,129
Come in my back door, bubba.

151
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:39,964
Riding the bologna pony?

152
00:05:40,089 --> 00:05:41,090
What'd I tell you?

153
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:42,300
Hmm.
You know what?

154
00:05:42,425 --> 00:05:44,093
I just think you need a change of venue

155
00:05:44,218 --> 00:05:46,971
♪ You say love ♪

156
00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:51,976
♪ Is easy ♪

157
00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:53,269
♪ ♪

158
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:58,399
♪ But love is painful ♪

159
00:05:58,524 --> 00:06:03,863
♪ But love can make you cry ♪

160
00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:08,951
♪ But love can leave you bloody ♪

161
00:06:09,077 --> 00:06:10,870
♪ It's not easy ♪

162
00:06:10,995 --> 00:06:15,500
♪ But love fills you up inside ♪

163
00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:18,211
[Crowd cheers and whistles]

164
00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:22,924
[Strums]

165
00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,133
Maybe America is ready

166
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:26,386
for my innocent,
wholesome country songs.

167
00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,638
And not dirty songs
that are all about sex

168
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:30,473
like your people's music.

169
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:32,558
And with me as your manager,
you're gonna be big.

170
00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:34,310
Everybody loved me last night.

171
00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:36,938
I got so many high fives and ass slaps.

172
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,439
Those guys over at Hogg Riders

173
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:39,941
they sure know how
to have a good time.

174
00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:41,150
They sure do, buddy.

175
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:42,860
Now you better be
moseying on out of here.

176
00:06:42,944 --> 00:06:44,529
You gotta practice up
for your next gig.

177
00:06:44,695 --> 00:06:47,073
Denzel booked me at this
place called a bathhouse.

178
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,408
That's actually a...

179
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:49,951
A place where men
can wash each other's dicks

180
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:52,036
in a heterosexual manner.

181
00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,247
Why aren't you telling
Steve the truth?

182
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:56,499
Steve thinks his songs are
all pure and innocent.

183
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:58,543
if he knew there are
about hard-core gay sex,

184
00:06:58,626 --> 00:06:59,669
he wouldn't play them.

185
00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:02,088
And you wouldn't be wearing
a new panda skin jacket.

186
00:07:03,047 --> 00:07:04,632
Oh, don't be a hater, it's faux.

187
00:07:04,715 --> 00:07:07,135
Fo-Sho real panda skin.

188
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:08,302
Ha ha!

189
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:09,303
Listen up, rangers.

190
00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:10,930
There is a problem with Malloy.

191
00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:14,350
[Motorcycle revs]

192
00:07:14,475 --> 00:07:15,852
Sup, squirts?

193
00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:17,270
- Huh.
- Cool.

194
00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:18,729
Hey, I guess magic is real.

195
00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:20,898
Malloy, what are you doing
with that death machine?

196
00:07:20,982 --> 00:07:22,525
Shut up Woody she's been tested.

197
00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:24,861
You can't ride without a helmet.

198
00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,155
Do you want a [bleep] up
Gary beauty brain?

199
00:07:27,238 --> 00:07:28,489
Don't be ridiculous.

200
00:07:28,573 --> 00:07:29,615
These things aren't dangerous.

201
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:30,908
[Motorcycle revs]

202
00:07:31,033 --> 00:07:33,077
Oh no!
I'll give her mouth-to-mouth.

203
00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:34,787
That's not her mouth.

204
00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:37,790
It's okay.
She's dead.

205
00:07:40,501 --> 00:07:41,544
You okay, Woody?

206
00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,672
I'd be better if a giant bear
didn't maul me in my sleep.

207
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:46,048
It stopped your snoring.

208
00:07:46,507 --> 00:07:48,468
Oh Malloy,
you destroyed the bathroom!

209
00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:49,594
Where's the toilet?

210
00:07:49,677 --> 00:07:51,679
Check under that big pile of bear shit.

211
00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:54,056
God damn it, Malloy,
you've wrecked the place!

212
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:56,225
Is that Abortia-geddon?

213
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:58,269
No, it's Abortia-geddon two.

214
00:07:58,352 --> 00:08:00,188
I told you that game was verboten!

215
00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:02,231
I even used German to make it scarier.

216
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,567
I'm big.
I can buy any game I want.

217
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,694
No more fetus games,

218
00:08:06,777 --> 00:08:09,322
No more midnight maulings,
and the motor cycle.

219
00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:10,406
Has got to go!

220
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,991
My house, my rules.

221
00:08:12,074 --> 00:08:14,827
Then I'll just move out of your house.

222
00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:15,912
Ha!

223
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:18,539
You won't make it for a second
in the real world.

224
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:21,417
You'll be crawling back,
begging me to take you in.

225
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,543
I'll never come back here.

226
00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,587
I'm done with you
and your bullshit rules.

227
00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:26,839
Little bear, you have no idea

228
00:08:26,923 --> 00:08:28,925
how miserable
you're gonna be out there.

229
00:08:32,595 --> 00:08:34,764
You girls are so hot!

230
00:08:36,557 --> 00:08:38,476
Okay, closing time!

231
00:08:39,101 --> 00:08:41,854
Here's your bill, bear.
That will be $700.

232
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,732
Oh.
I am out of money.

233
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:48,236
Get outta here!
And go get a job, you deadbeat!

234
00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,905
I don't need a job or this place.

235
00:08:54,158 --> 00:08:55,743
This is amazing!

236
00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,331
How's everybody doing?

237
00:09:00,414 --> 00:09:01,499
[Crowd cheers]

238
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:04,168
This song about my friend Pedro...
[Unplugs mic]

239
00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:06,504
Who rode my donkey
all the way to Mexico.

240
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:08,005
Without a saddle.
[Plugs mic in]

241
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:11,259
♪ Pedro's going bareback on my ass ♪

242
00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:15,846
♪ Pedro's going bareback on my ass ♪

243
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:19,642
♪ I said skin on skin
may give you an infection ♪

244
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:24,689
♪ But he slapped my ass ♪
♪ Said he don't use no protection ♪

245
00:09:24,855 --> 00:09:28,818
♪ Pedro's riding my ass raw ♪

246
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:32,738
♪ Pedro's riding my ass raw ♪

247
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:37,034
♪ He's a real man without a doubt ♪

248
00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:40,705
♪ But when Pedro's done
my ass will be worn out ♪

249
00:09:40,788 --> 00:09:41,872
Hyah!

250
00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:42,999
[Crowd cheers]

251
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:44,417
Thank you, everyone!

252
00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:48,879
Hey, get off me!

253
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,674
Hello, Denzel.

254
00:09:51,799 --> 00:09:52,800
Who the hell are you?

255
00:09:52,883 --> 00:09:54,218
I'm the head of the gay mafia.

256
00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:56,679
We control Hollywood and
all of entertainment.

257
00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:57,888
You do exist.

258
00:09:57,972 --> 00:09:59,515
Fox News was right.

259
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:01,601
Ya they're right about everything.

260
00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:02,768
We wanna help you.

261
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,895
You've taken Steve Williams
as far as he can go.

262
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,940
It's time for the gay mafia
to take him to the next level.

263
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:10,359
Stadiums, record deals, Youtube.

264
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,028
Holy shit!
Youtube?

265
00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:14,196
- You can really do that?
- Yeah!

266
00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,240
Denzel, you seem like a man
who likes money.

267
00:10:16,324 --> 00:10:18,534
If you sign a contract
with us right now,

268
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,578
we'll give you a cash signing bonus.

269
00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:22,496
I am a man who likes money.

270
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,832
And do we have to tell Steve
about the signing bonus?

271
00:10:24,915 --> 00:10:26,667
That is up to Steve's manager.

272
00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:28,628
That's me.
So the answer is...

273
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:30,212
Aw, hell no!

274
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:33,799
This is a huge arena.

275
00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:35,384
How did you pull this off?

276
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:37,887
I, have a few new connections.

277
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:38,971
Thanks, man.

278
00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,015
You're really helping me
make my mark on the world.

279
00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:42,683
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now put this on and get out there.

280
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,144
[Cheers and applause]

281
00:10:45,227 --> 00:10:46,937
This song is all about a guy...
[Unplugs mic]

282
00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:48,731
Couldn't make it home for Christmas,

283
00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:51,108
because the transmission
went out on his pickup truck.

284
00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,319
[Plugs mic in]
What'd he say?

285
00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:54,528
Mm-Mm-Mm.

286
00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,614
♪ Honey, tell the kids ♪

287
00:10:56,697 --> 00:11:01,118
♪ I won't be home today ♪

288
00:11:01,243 --> 00:11:02,286
♪ Got something to tell you ♪

289
00:11:02,411 --> 00:11:07,166
♪ That's really hard to say ♪

290
00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:10,378
♪ I blew a tranny last night ♪

291
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,714
♪ I blew a tranny last night ♪

292
00:11:13,839 --> 00:11:17,176
♪ This might hurt you,
but there's nothing I can do ♪

293
00:11:17,301 --> 00:11:20,304
♪'Cause I blew a tranny last night ♪

294
00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:23,933
♪ I blew a tranny last night ♪

295
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:27,436
♪ I blew a tranny last night ♪

296
00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:30,731
♪ This might hurt you,
but there's nothing I can do ♪

297
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:33,526
♪ 'Cause I blew a tranny ♪

298
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:37,279
♪ Last night ♪

299
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:41,283
Steve! Steve! Steve!
Steve! Steve! Steve!

300
00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,202
And I'm not supposed to say it,

301
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:45,746
but George Clooney had sex
right where you're standing.

302
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,832
Wow!
I need this place.

303
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,583
Great!
It's a steal at 8,000 a month.

304
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:50,835
What can I get for 4 bucks

305
00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:53,129
And a rough hand job
without bear paws?

306
00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:54,630
Nice, huh?

307
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,591
Bedroom, bathroom, kitchen,
all in one room.

308
00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:58,759
Plus...

309
00:12:00,010 --> 00:12:01,053
Central air!

310
00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:03,013
Uh, is he dead?

311
00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:05,266
Don't worry not murder,
poisonous spiders.

312
00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:07,268
- You take it?
- Guess I have no choice.

313
00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:10,980
Great. And tell your roomate
to stop giving me the stink eye.

314
00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:13,149
[Spider hisses]

315
00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:17,486
[Whistling]

316
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,488
Wow, Woody.
You're in a good mood.

317
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:20,906
Why wouldn't I be?

318
00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:23,826
'Cause we thought you'd be skunk
shit crazy now that Malloy's gone.

319
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,953
What are you talking about?
Malloy's not gone.

320
00:12:26,036 --> 00:12:27,455
He's right here.

321
00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:28,789
- Jesus!
- Aah!

322
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,666
Incoming!
Eat the women and children first!

323
00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:32,001
Aah!

324
00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:33,753
Uh-Oh.

325
00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:35,588
[Imitating gunfire]

326
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:36,881
- We need to get Malloy back...
- [Screaming]

327
00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:38,966
To calm Woody down
before he gets worse.

328
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,510
What the hell is Charlie doing in Iraq?

329
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:42,595
[Camera clicks]
Ha ha!

330
00:12:42,678 --> 00:12:45,181
We like Brickleberry Park!

331
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,701
- Why am I riding a guy again?
- Look, it's all CGI.

332
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,870
They're gonna turn that guy
into a horse later.

333
00:13:07,953 --> 00:13:09,622
That's how they did it
in Lord Of The Rings.

334
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:11,957
Don't you think this is kinda graphic?

335
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:13,918
We've got a lot riding
on Steve's success

336
00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:15,377
so let me make this clear:

337
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:17,505
Go tell Steve that we want
it to be more graphic,

338
00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:19,924
or you wind up in a ditch
with your dick in your mouth.

339
00:13:20,007 --> 00:13:21,509
More graphic it is.

340
00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,803
Hey Steve, smack your horse
on the ass a few times.

341
00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:25,429
Whatever you say, Denzel.

342
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:28,140
Now pretend your shaking
a thick ketchup bottle

343
00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:29,266
On your face.

344
00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:31,310
- Like this?
- No, it's stuck.

345
00:13:31,393 --> 00:13:32,978
You gotta shake it harder!

346
00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:34,897
Oh, the cap is still on.

347
00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:36,440
Try to take it off with your butt.

348
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,776
This is gonna be a cool video.

349
00:13:42,863 --> 00:13:44,532
Congratulations, Denzel.

350
00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:47,535
We've booked a huge concert for Steve
at Brickleberry Amphitheater.

351
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:48,661
Ooh, that's great.

352
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,287
Now I'll be able to pay off this.

353
00:13:51,163 --> 00:13:53,874
We'll need Steve to debut
a hot single at the concert.

354
00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:55,042
Done.

355
00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:57,711
We're also gonna need him
to promote the concert on Ellen.

356
00:13:57,795 --> 00:13:59,505
Oh no.
Steve can't do tv.

357
00:13:59,588 --> 00:14:00,631
He doesn't even know his songs...

358
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,132
Oh!
I mean all right!

359
00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:05,219
Which has less calories?

360
00:14:05,344 --> 00:14:07,346
The chicken-zilla
or the beef St. Helens?

361
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:08,597
Like it matters.

362
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:09,682
Why don't you just get a yummy meal?

363
00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:11,809
It comes with a mirror,
so you can find your cooch.

364
00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:12,935
Marroy!

365
00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:14,520
You mean to customers.

366
00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:15,479
You fired!

367
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,231
I need this job, man.
I have bills to pay.

368
00:14:17,314 --> 00:14:19,024
Oh, wah.

369
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:20,150
You fired!

370
00:14:21,902 --> 00:14:24,780
By the way, I jerked off
in the silly sauce.

371
00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:26,365
Enjoy.

372
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:29,493
[Upbeat music]

373
00:14:29,577 --> 00:14:30,578
Please welcome

374
00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:33,163
Country music icon Steve Williams.

375
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:36,208
[Applause]

376
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:40,462
♪ ♪

377
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:42,256
Steve, you're a brave man.

378
00:14:42,339 --> 00:14:44,717
Thank you sir.
So are you, Alan.

379
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:47,219
Uh, we are just so honored

380
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:50,264
to have the first gay country
music artist on our show today.

381
00:14:50,639 --> 00:14:52,725
Oh!
Kenny Chesney's here?

382
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,393
[Laughter]

383
00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:56,228
You are such a hoot.

384
00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:58,814
We have a little clip
of your latest music video.

385
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,317
I hope I can awkwardly dance to it.

386
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,360
No, shit.
Not the video.

387
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:05,738
You want to tell us anything about it?

388
00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:08,699
I opened an invisible bottle
of ketchup with my butt.

389
00:15:08,782 --> 00:15:10,868
Amazing.
Let's roll the video.

390
00:15:10,951 --> 00:15:12,119
[Country music]

391
00:15:12,202 --> 00:15:13,078
Oh, my God.

392
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:15,331
What am I doing?
that's not ketchup!

393
00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:18,042
Why would they squirt that on me?

394
00:15:18,125 --> 00:15:19,793
Close your mouth, Steve!

395
00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:20,920
No!

396
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,463
Aah!

397
00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:23,672
Why?

398
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,424
[Upbeat music]
Why?

399
00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:29,720
Hey!
What are you doing?

400
00:15:29,803 --> 00:15:32,222
Kicking you out!
You're late on your rent!

401
00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:34,016
Seriously?

402
00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:38,771
- Seriously?
- Ahh.

403
00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:40,522
Uh, yes, sir.

404
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:45,819
I wish you were here
to tell me a bedtime story.

405
00:15:46,153 --> 00:15:47,404
Once upon a time,

406
00:15:47,488 --> 00:15:50,532
I stabbed my [bleep] Pimp to death

407
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:52,910
With a broke-off buick antenna!

408
00:15:52,993 --> 00:15:54,536
Good night, baby.

409
00:15:55,537 --> 00:15:57,373
Look, Steve, I just wanna...

410
00:15:57,456 --> 00:15:59,041
No.
I don't wanna hear more of your lies.

411
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,459
You made me a fraud.

412
00:16:00,542 --> 00:16:02,127
Nothing against gay sex,

413
00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:03,629
I mean, it's on my bucket list,

414
00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:06,548
but these songs were innocent,
and you betrayed me.

415
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:07,675
I'm sorry, Steve.

416
00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,343
I just wanted to help you
leave your mark.

417
00:16:09,426 --> 00:16:11,011
I promise
I'll never lie to you again.

418
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:13,347
It's too late.
I quit

419
00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:14,431
You can't quit!

420
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:16,767
Oh, yeah? They said
I couldn't spell either,

421
00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:21,730
but watch me l-e-v-e.

422
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,732
You're not going anywhere.

423
00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:25,234
Who are these effeminate thugs?

424
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,486
Oh, uh, I may have signed
your life away to the gay mafia

425
00:16:27,569 --> 00:16:28,737
Without telling you.

426
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,155
That's an omission of fact.
Not a lie.

427
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:31,407
Big difference.

428
00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:32,533
That little freak-out on Ellen

429
00:16:32,616 --> 00:16:34,034
Better not mean trouble
for your concert,

430
00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:36,704
because if you don't show up with a
new single, you are both

431
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:42,751
♪ Dead ♪

432
00:16:43,419 --> 00:16:44,712
If I'm gonna get a death threat,

433
00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:46,422
I do prefer show tune-style.

434
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,924
Oh.
We've searched for hours.

435
00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,009
Where could he be?

436
00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:51,176
[Metal banging]

437
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,886
Stupid machine.
I hate you.

438
00:16:52,970 --> 00:16:54,096
Malloy!

439
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:55,681
I never thought I'd say this,

440
00:16:55,764 --> 00:16:56,890
but I'm really happy
to see you guys.

441
00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:58,100
I hate being big.

442
00:16:58,183 --> 00:17:00,394
I know exactly what you mean.

443
00:17:00,477 --> 00:17:02,771
I said "big," not "Kathy Bates."

444
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:04,440
Woody needs you.

445
00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:06,150
He's gone crazy without you around.

446
00:17:06,233 --> 00:17:07,317
There's nothing I can do.

447
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:09,361
This machine only grants
one wish per customer.

448
00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:10,696
I can make a wish.

449
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,699
[Harp music]

450
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:15,951
Oops, sorry.

451
00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:18,078
That's the first thing i
popped into my head.

452
00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:20,080
Connie, this isn't about you.

453
00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:23,000
[Harp music]

454
00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:24,752
Oh, it didn't work.

455
00:17:24,835 --> 00:17:25,961
Yes, it did.

456
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,588
Guess who's HPV-free.

457
00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:28,589
Give it a week.

458
00:17:28,672 --> 00:17:29,715
We need to get Woody.

459
00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:31,383
He's the only one
who would use his wish

460
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:32,843
to make Malloy small again.

461
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:36,722
[Harp music]

462
00:17:36,805 --> 00:17:38,140
Oh, Ray-Ray, you alive!

463
00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,683
Oh, I'm so happy.

464
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,393
I get to kill you again mother[bleep]!

465
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,478
Oh!
Ooh! Ooh!

466
00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:44,396
Woody!

467
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,690
Oh, he could be anywhere.

468
00:17:47,941 --> 00:17:50,569
[Suspenseful music]

469
00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:53,280
Say hello to my little friend.

470
00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:54,281
I'll say.

471
00:17:54,364 --> 00:17:56,200
Hey, the water's cold, all right?

472
00:17:56,283 --> 00:17:58,577
We all know I'm packing 12
when I'm hanging right.

473
00:17:58,660 --> 00:17:59,995
Now prepare to die!

474
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:01,872
[Imitating gunshots]

475
00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:03,040
[Grunts]

476
00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:04,583
You'll never take me alive!

477
00:18:04,666 --> 00:18:07,086
Um... Bang?

478
00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:08,629
[Screams]

479
00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:11,882
Come on, man,
you got another song in you.

480
00:18:11,965 --> 00:18:14,468
Okay,Okay, I can do this.

481
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:17,888
♪ I wanna put my butt ♪

482
00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:19,848
♪ In your butt ♪

483
00:18:20,307 --> 00:18:21,391
We're [bleep].

484
00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:22,601
To do now honourable thing

485
00:18:22,684 --> 00:18:24,144
is to change our names
and start a new life.

486
00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:27,064
Good thing I keep a couple
of emergency disguises just in case.

487
00:18:27,731 --> 00:18:29,650
Steve, what in the hell
are we supposed to be?

488
00:18:29,733 --> 00:18:31,985
Duh. The Lone Ranger
and Tauntaun.

489
00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:33,237
We'll blend right in.

490
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,239
Steve, Steve Williams?

491
00:18:35,322 --> 00:18:36,573
Uh, no.

492
00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:37,741
I'm a Tauntaun.

493
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,535
[Babbles]

494
00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:42,663
My entire life I've been
bullied for being gay.

495
00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:45,457
I was about to end it all
before I heard your music.

496
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:47,668
You're my hero.

497
00:18:47,751 --> 00:18:49,211
You're telling me your life was saved

498
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:50,504
by the song butt love?

499
00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:52,005
Be quiet, chemotherapy.

500
00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:54,091
This kid just gave me
an idea for a song.

501
00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:55,425
What's your name, son?

502
00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:56,677
Billy Black.

503
00:18:56,844 --> 00:18:58,178
[Cheers and applause]

504
00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:01,014
My biggest fan inspired me
to write a touching new song.

505
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:02,933
Come up onstage here, Billy.

506
00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:04,518
[Cheers and applause]

507
00:19:04,601 --> 00:19:06,478
Billy, I promise it gets better,

508
00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,897
eventhough sometimes
people can be cruel.

509
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:11,191
This school up to you Billy Black.

510
00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:13,527
[Soft country music]

511
00:19:13,610 --> 00:19:15,404
♪ ♪

512
00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:18,991
♪ I'm so sorry, Billy ♪

513
00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:21,160
♪ bBack, people suck ♪

514
00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:25,330
♪ It's not your fault, Billy ♪

515
00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:27,332
♪ Black, people stink ♪

516
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:31,503
♪ Don't worry,Billy ♪

517
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:34,298
♪ Black, people are animals ♪

518
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:38,886
♪I'd like to tie 'em to my pickup truck ♪

519
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:42,264
♪ And drag 'em down the road ♪

520
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,474
Gay riot!

521
00:19:45,767 --> 00:19:47,936
That's it.
You guys are finished.

522
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,479
[Crowd yells and boos]

523
00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:52,691
[Screams]

524
00:19:53,233 --> 00:19:54,067
Oh, man.

525
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:55,986
What kind have been
named Billy Mexican?

526
00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:00,240
I'll give you anything you want.

527
00:20:00,324 --> 00:20:01,575
Just don't kill me!

528
00:20:01,658 --> 00:20:02,826
Ow!

529
00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:04,286
Cubsy wubsy.

530
00:20:04,369 --> 00:20:05,621
Is that you?

531
00:20:05,704 --> 00:20:06,705
Woody!

532
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:08,665
Woody, I was wrong.

533
00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:09,917
Being big sucks.

534
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,251
Please wish me smaller.

535
00:20:11,335 --> 00:20:13,670
Anything for you, little buddy.

536
00:20:15,839 --> 00:20:18,842
[Harp music]

537
00:20:19,801 --> 00:20:21,094
I love magic.

538
00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:23,305
[Harp music]
Ah, shit, what's happening?

539
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:24,223
Aww!

540
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:27,893
My cubsy wubsy is even cuter
wuder when he's tiny whiney.

541
00:20:27,976 --> 00:20:30,437
Goddamn irony.
Magic sucks.

542
00:20:32,439 --> 00:20:33,732
That was a disaster.

543
00:20:33,815 --> 00:20:35,651
Why did they hate my song so much?

544
00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:36,902
Don't sweat it, Steve.

545
00:20:36,985 --> 00:20:38,487
You just need a change of venue.

546
00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:42,658
♪ I'd like to tie 'em to my pickup truck ♪

547
00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:45,869
♪ And drag 'em down the road ♪

548
00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:47,955
[Crowd cheers]

549
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:49,414
Denzel was right.

550
00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,584
His angry cansurpicians
love my Billy Black song.

551
00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:53,877
All: Heil, Steve!

552
00:20:53,961 --> 00:20:55,462
Hi back to you!

553
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:57,214
Aah!