1
00:00:02,293 --> 00:00:04,587
So on this sad,
and yet happy day,

2
00:00:04,921 --> 00:00:07,841
let's all raise a glass
to celebrate the retirement

3
00:00:07,924 --> 00:00:09,884
of everyone's favorite
park ranger,

4
00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:12,887
the glue that held us all
together for so many years,

5
00:00:12,971 --> 00:00:13,888
to...

6
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:14,806
Harold.

7
00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:17,267
- Who the [bleep] is Harold?
- I've never heard of him.

8
00:00:17,392 --> 00:00:20,562
Woody put him on lookout duty
in the fire tower 20 years ago

9
00:00:20,645 --> 00:00:21,896
and forgot to relieve him.

10
00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:24,566
So he spent two decades
by himself in a small tower?

11
00:00:24,649 --> 00:00:26,985
Wow, he's lucky
he didn't go nuts.

12
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:27,986
You're the devil.

13
00:00:28,111 --> 00:00:29,779
I will burn you!

14
00:00:29,946 --> 00:00:31,614
[High-Pitched]
You got to catch me first.

15
00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:33,283
[Laughs demonically]

16
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:36,327
Tequila sunrise,
hold the sunrise.

17
00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:38,204
[Glass shatters]

18
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:41,791
- It's on the house.
- Well, aren't you a sweetheart?

19
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,668
Do you really think
the bartender

20
00:00:43,752 --> 00:00:46,421
just gave you a free drink
because he's a sweetheart?

21
00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:47,922
Yeah, why else?

22
00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:49,799
Because your pants
are so tight,

23
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:51,676
I can read the mileage
on your vagina.

24
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:53,470
That is so sexist.

25
00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:56,181
I don't get preferential
treatment because of my looks.

26
00:00:56,264 --> 00:00:58,558
He gives out drinks
because he's a nice guy.

27
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,518
Can I get a glass
of tap water?

28
00:01:00,643 --> 00:01:02,312
Beat it, sea world.

29
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:05,774
[Uplifting music]

30
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:06,816
[Crunching]

31
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:07,734
[Screams]

32
00:01:07,817 --> 00:01:12,155
♪ Brickleberry ♪

33
00:01:14,032 --> 00:01:15,950
Woody, after two years
of hard work,

34
00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,744
my sanctuary
for orphan baby animals

35
00:01:17,827 --> 00:01:19,329
is almost complete.

36
00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:22,373
Will you throw me
a big grand opening party?

37
00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,709
Sure, Ethel,
whatever you want.

38
00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:26,961
Yes! See, Malloy?
It's not about my good looks.

39
00:01:27,045 --> 00:01:28,630
It's about my good ideas.
Ohh, yeah...

40
00:01:28,713 --> 00:01:30,048
Of course it is.

41
00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:32,383
Woody... Could I...

42
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:33,384
No, [bleep] off!

43
00:01:33,468 --> 00:01:34,385
Listen, people,

44
00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:35,804
now that our darling Harold

45
00:01:35,887 --> 00:01:37,388
has retired to Florida...

46
00:01:37,555 --> 00:01:39,724
I thought they locked him up
in a mental institution.

47
00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:42,060
Florida, mental institution...
What's the difference?

48
00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:44,896
Anyway, we need a new ranger
A.S.A.P.

49
00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:47,148
Now, I got some money
from Jackubowski

50
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:48,441
to shoot a recruitment video.

51
00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:49,567
It's got to be good...

52
00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:51,402
Like, Godfather III good.

53
00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:53,404
Not dog shit like them first two.

54
00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:54,948
Ethel, since you're
the only person here

55
00:01:55,031 --> 00:01:56,866
with a somewhat
human appearance,

56
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,409
you're gonna be
my lead actress.

57
00:01:58,493 --> 00:02:00,703
Woody, did you
forget something?

58
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:02,163
It's the first of the month.

59
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:03,289
Oh, yeah, that's right.

60
00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:04,666
The ranger of the month is...

61
00:02:04,749 --> 00:02:06,084
Steve again.

62
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,168
Yay.

63
00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:08,711
Now, if you'll excuse me,

64
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:11,005
I've to go to my office
for an important meeting.

65
00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:14,259
And I have to call my mom
and tell her the good news.

66
00:02:14,342 --> 00:02:16,261
[Melodic ringtone]

67
00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:17,345
Hey...

68
00:02:17,428 --> 00:02:19,305
I know that ringtone.

69
00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:21,266
Hi, mom.

70
00:02:21,349 --> 00:02:22,934
Mom, what are you doing?

71
00:02:23,017 --> 00:02:23,893
Hi, honey.

72
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:24,894
Ooh!

73
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:25,895
We were just, uh...

74
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:27,939
Oh, I lost my car keys.

75
00:02:28,022 --> 00:02:30,108
I was looking for them
with my dick

76
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,234
in your mom's cooch.

77
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:33,194
You're screwing my mom!

78
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:36,114
Look, honey.
It's complicated.

79
00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:37,991
No, it's not.
It's simple.

80
00:02:38,074 --> 00:02:40,577
Your mom had sex with me
to get you a job here,

81
00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,078
and every month since

82
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:43,496
so you can be
Ranger of the Month.

83
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:44,706
Even though you suck!

84
00:02:44,873 --> 00:02:46,791
What? But I earned this medal.

85
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,334
I'm not a bad ranger.

86
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,794
Yeah, just like my balls

87
00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:52,005
ain't slapping around
on your mom's ass crack.

88
00:02:52,088 --> 00:02:54,591
Oh, sorry you had
to find out like this, dear.

89
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:56,259
Oh, got them!

90
00:02:56,342 --> 00:02:58,928
Hey, hang on.
I don't drive a saab.

91
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,557
Ranger recruitment video,
take one.

92
00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:04,142
And... Action!

93
00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:07,520
Why would you want to work
at Brickleberry national park?

94
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:08,730
Here's two reasons.

95
00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:11,107
Now jump up and down
and shake that sweater meat.

96
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:12,066
Boing-Boing.

97
00:03:12,233 --> 00:03:14,402
Cut! That's not your line.
That's your direction.

98
00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:16,404
Now get them B-cups bouncin'.

99
00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:18,239
Screw this.
I'm outta here.

100
00:03:18,364 --> 00:03:19,782
Fine, I don't need you!

101
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:20,950
I don't need any of you!

102
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:22,660
Get the hell off my set.

103
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:24,787
I'll finish this crap myself.
Ow!

104
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,456
Woody's a real mother[bleep].

105
00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:31,127
[Sobbing]

106
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:35,381
[Crying]

107
00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:37,175
What's the matter, sweetie?

108
00:03:37,258 --> 00:03:38,343
What's the matter?

109
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:39,886
You're banging my boss

110
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:41,804
so I could be
ranger of the month.

111
00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:44,224
Oh, you're still upset about that?

112
00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:45,892
It's really not a big deal.

113
00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:49,062
I do anyhing with anyone for my son.

114
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,480
Always have.

115
00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:53,524
Wait...
You've done this before?

116
00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,526
Faster!
Faster!

117
00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:56,861
But the light's red.

118
00:03:56,986 --> 00:03:59,280
Don't stop.
Oh, don't stop!

119
00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:00,240
Okay.

120
00:04:02,825 --> 00:04:04,077
Great job.

121
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:05,411
You passed.

122
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:16,547
You had sex with everyone
on the opposing team?

123
00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:18,007
That was a long day.

124
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,801
Anywho, pizza for dinner?

125
00:04:19,884 --> 00:04:21,010
Jeez, mom.

126
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:22,553
You have to promise me that you won't

127
00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:25,014
sleep with anybody else
in order to help me out.

128
00:04:25,181 --> 00:04:27,100
I'm taking my life back.

129
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:28,518
You hear me?

130
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:29,978
Mom!

131
00:04:30,144 --> 00:04:31,354
Ease back, cochise.

132
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:32,855
It's just the tip.

133
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:35,984
All right, here it is,

134
00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:38,236
the finished recruitment video.

135
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:40,405
Denzel, try out to talk to the screen.

136
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:43,449
[Thunder crashing]

137
00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:47,537
[Screaming]

138
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:48,788
[Rocks blasting]

139
00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:53,751
Ha!

140
00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:58,756
[Roars]

141
00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:03,469
[Roars]

142
00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:05,138
Ugh!

143
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:06,472
[Flames roar]

144
00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:08,266
Brickleberry!

145
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:10,685
The legend continues!

146
00:05:13,646 --> 00:05:15,064
What the hell was that?

147
00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:19,193
That was three-part to million dollars
of taxpayer money well-spent.

148
00:05:19,277 --> 00:05:20,987
But it doesn't make any sense.

149
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:22,405
Hey, screw you.
It worked.

150
00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:24,032
Look at all these applicants.

151
00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:26,868
Navy Seal, Green Beret, Ted Nugent.

152
00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,661
I'll handle the hiring process.

153
00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:30,204
We need to show these applicants

154
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:32,290
that working here is serious business.

155
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:34,042
♪ Da da-da-da da daah... ♪

156
00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:35,752
Pow!
Ha-Ha, got her.

157
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,837
[Farting]

158
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,839
Welcome to hell week.

159
00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:41,758
You wanna be a Brickleberry ranger?

160
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:44,260
Well, this is your chance
to prove it.

161
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,180
But those who can't cut it,
ring the loser bell.

162
00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:48,848
Who's that?

163
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:50,683
One of your coworkers
if you make it.

164
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:52,352
You'll be seeing her every day.

165
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:53,686
Me first!
Me first!

166
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:54,687
[Bell dinging]

167
00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:55,980
[All clamoring]

168
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,815
Sorry I'm late.

169
00:05:57,899 --> 00:05:59,984
Looks like we have a winner.

170
00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,529
Woody, it's gonna difficult search,

171
00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:05,323
but I think I've found
our ranger.

172
00:06:05,406 --> 00:06:06,699
Dirk, come on in.

173
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:09,035
[Crashing, clattering]

174
00:06:09,118 --> 00:06:10,620
Meet Dirk Mahogany.

175
00:06:10,703 --> 00:06:11,913
He's a former navy seal,

176
00:06:11,996 --> 00:06:13,748
and he's the guy
who landed the kill shot

177
00:06:13,831 --> 00:06:15,083
that took down Bin Laden.

178
00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:16,459
Oh, and best of all,

179
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:20,129
he is an expert on
orphan baby animals.

180
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,297
Hey, sounds terrific.

181
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,465
Good job, Ethel.

182
00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:23,424
[Door opens]

183
00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:26,260
[Sweet, gentle music]

184
00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:28,513
Holy shit.

185
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:31,432
Hi, I'm Amber.

186
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:32,934
- Wow!
- Damn!

187
00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:35,978
[Giggling breathily]

188
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,563
I'm here about the job.

189
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:39,816
Ya, actually, we've already decided...

190
00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:40,900
That you're hired.

191
00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:42,110
Oh, goodie!

192
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,070
- What?
- Yes!

193
00:06:47,865 --> 00:06:50,076
Woody, how could you possibly
hire that girl?

194
00:06:50,159 --> 00:06:52,787
Do you know what she did
her first morning on the job?

195
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:55,206
You shot my husband!

196
00:06:55,289 --> 00:06:58,000
Oh, I thought he was a
bear attacking you.

197
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,544
He's not a bear!

198
00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:01,129
He's just Armenian.

199
00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:03,214
It's okay.
She's hot.

200
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:04,757
Bear!

201
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:07,635
Show the world there's
one less clogged shower drain.

202
00:07:07,718 --> 00:07:09,554
Amber ain't going anywhere,
Ethel.

203
00:07:09,887 --> 00:07:11,055
Good morning, everybody.

204
00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:14,016
So Ethel, how's the feel
to be the new Connie?

205
00:07:14,183 --> 00:07:16,102
Woody,
I put all my dirty panties

206
00:07:16,185 --> 00:07:18,062
in your cabin like you asked.

207
00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,647
What's my next assignment?

208
00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:22,400
Oh, pick up them pencils
I dropped on the floor.

209
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:23,317
Where?

210
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:24,819
Here's good.

211
00:07:25,862 --> 00:07:27,905
Nice and slow-like.

212
00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:29,740
This job is easy.

213
00:07:29,907 --> 00:07:31,325
Whoops!
[Laughs]

214
00:07:31,409 --> 00:07:34,328
Oh, it's like I've lotion
all over my hands.

215
00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:35,580
I have dry skin.

216
00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:37,790
Plus I beat off earlier.

217
00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:39,625
Can I have a five-minute break?

218
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,586
I need to wring out my spanx.

219
00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:42,920
Oh, God.
[Squishing]

220
00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:44,005
Whatever.

221
00:07:44,088 --> 00:07:45,673
At least Amber can't do much damage

222
00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:48,092
after she replaces crazy Harold
up in the fire tower.

223
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:49,760
Fire tower, the hell with that.

224
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,512
She has more important things to do.

225
00:07:51,721 --> 00:07:52,680
Like what?

226
00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:54,015
Whoopsie.

227
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:55,850
Denzel, you're going
to the fire tower.

228
00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:57,185
So let me get this straight.

229
00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:59,854
I'll be up there by myself
with nothing at all to do?

230
00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:02,106
- Uh... Huh.
- Sounds like my dream job.

231
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:03,566
See y'all crackers later.

232
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:05,776
But aren't you afraid
you'll go insane up there

233
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,820
all by yourself,
like Harold did?

234
00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:09,113
I ain't gonna go insane.

235
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,740
Only white people go insane.

236
00:08:10,823 --> 00:08:12,116
Y'all don't know how to relax.

237
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,952
I'll bet you go crazy
within five minutes.

238
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:16,537
Oh, whatever, man.

239
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:18,706
Well, I really miss that [bleep]
when he goes

240
00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:20,208
to the fire tower.

241
00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:21,125
Whoa.

242
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,794
We don't use that term here.

243
00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,087
Oh, sorry.

244
00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:26,714
I'll really miss that [bleep]

245
00:08:26,797 --> 00:08:28,341
when he goes to the watchtower.

246
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:32,011
Aw, I've never seen racism
be so adorable.

247
00:08:32,261 --> 00:08:34,347
Well, I'm sure Denzel
wouldn't agree.

248
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:35,389
Yes, I would.

249
00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,058
It's always wrong
when ugly people say it.

250
00:08:37,141 --> 00:08:38,226
Bye, Amber.

251
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:39,644
Bye, [bleep]!

252
00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:41,437
You know what?
Screw you guys.

253
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:44,774
I'm going to go work on my
orphan baby animal sanctuary.

254
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:45,691
Oh, I want to go!

255
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,485
I like baby "aminals."

256
00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:49,529
Anything for you, honeypot.

257
00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:51,614
Ethel, take Amber
and show her the ropes.

258
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:54,116
Ow, I love to show her the ropes.

259
00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:58,412
Wow, she's dead and she's
still hotter than Ethel.

260
00:08:58,496 --> 00:08:59,664
God damnit!

261
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,333
These are all lies.

262
00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:04,043
Lies, lies, lies!

263
00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:05,294
I didn't earn these.

264
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:07,046
My mom's vagina did.

265
00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:09,173
Well, I like your mom's vagina did.

266
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:11,676
Wait, wait, did you just beat me
to my own insult?

267
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:14,679
Steve, you just accomplished
something on your own.

268
00:09:14,762 --> 00:09:17,014
I did. I mean, I did!

269
00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:19,809
Unless my mom banged you,
so you would say that.

270
00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:22,603
No, but she did bang you
in the first placed

271
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:25,898
for a hot dog eating contest.

272
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:29,694
Huh, I guess we both swallowed
a lot of wieners that day.

273
00:09:29,777 --> 00:09:32,196
Hey, that gives me an idea.

274
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,865
I can go back and
try to earn all these things

275
00:09:34,949 --> 00:09:37,535
I've got in this life,
but for real this time.

276
00:09:37,618 --> 00:09:40,746
Mom, I want to list of
everybody you've ever banged

277
00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:42,832
in order to get me something in life.

278
00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:44,417
She's faxing it to me now.

279
00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:50,172
Who has a fax machine?

280
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,758
Oh, I was in Staples
and someone just gave it to me,

281
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,635
and I... God damnit, mom!

282
00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:56,470
I guess they found
her easy button.

283
00:09:56,554 --> 00:09:57,847
I guess they found her...

284
00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,390
Oh, I could have taken
the week off.

285
00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:03,477
Ha!
Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha!

286
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:05,354
Hee-Ya!

287
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:08,232
I did it on my own this time.

288
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:09,567
Yes, you did.

289
00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:11,193
But I miss giving your mother

290
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:13,404
fist training
in her lady parts.

291
00:10:13,487 --> 00:10:15,406
Hi-Ya!
Hi-Ya!

292
00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:17,325
Ho-Ya!

293
00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:21,829
Oh, cute, cute, cute!

294
00:10:21,912 --> 00:10:22,997
Be careful.

295
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:24,415
I rescued that poor little guy

296
00:10:24,498 --> 00:10:26,292
up to his parents
were killed by predators.

297
00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:28,336
Oh, no, the predator?

298
00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:30,838
Someone call
Arnold Schwarze-[bleep].

299
00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:33,257
That's not how you
pronounce it, at all.

300
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,134
Hey, little birdie.

301
00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:37,094
You don't need to be so sad.

302
00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:38,137
Here.

303
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,472
What did you just do?

304
00:10:39,555 --> 00:10:41,849
I gave him a zoloft to make him happy.

305
00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:44,060
You can't give a bird zoloft!

306
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:45,936
[Groans sleepily]

307
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:47,938
Oh, no.
[Giggles]

308
00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,024
That adderall will take
the edge off.

309
00:10:50,107 --> 00:10:51,317
See?

310
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:54,695
Fly away, God's creature.

311
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:55,780
Thud!

312
00:10:57,573 --> 00:10:58,658
What a dream job,

313
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:00,701
I'm gettin' a pay for sitting on my ass
and chilling.

314
00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:02,620
Them fools think I'm gonna
go crazy in five minutes

315
00:11:02,745 --> 00:11:04,455
just because I'm up here by myself.

316
00:11:04,538 --> 00:11:06,123
I've already been up here
four minutes,

317
00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:07,750
and I ain't never felt
more sane in my life.

318
00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:09,251
Ain't that, right?
Owl made out of spaghetti?

319
00:11:09,710 --> 00:11:11,003
Don't-a worry, Denzel.

320
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:14,340
I bet you gonna be just-a fine.

321
00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:17,760
Thank you all for being here tonight

322
00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:19,136
to celebrate the opening

323
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:23,099
of the Ethel Anderson's
Orphan Animal Sanctuary.

324
00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:25,309
Hello?

325
00:11:25,393 --> 00:11:27,520
So... Do Asian people

326
00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:29,146
see the world in letterbox?

327
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:32,024
Ah...Sure, sure.
Whatever you say.

328
00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:34,485
Welcome, Amber?

329
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:35,736
We're supposed to be celebrating

330
00:11:35,820 --> 00:11:37,947
the grand opening of
my animal sanctuary.

331
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:39,448
Change of plans, fugly.

332
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,242
Now scram. You're blocking
my view of Amber.

333
00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:42,451
This is my night.

334
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,453
This is not about
some racist pill-popper

335
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,496
with nice tits.

336
00:11:45,746 --> 00:11:47,123
Aw, thanks, Ethel.

337
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:49,500
And thanks for coming
to my welcome party.

338
00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,127
You look so cute.

339
00:11:51,210 --> 00:11:53,337
Amber, you are so sweet

340
00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:54,880
for lying to Ethel like that.

341
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,382
Give me a hug.

342
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:58,008
Now one from behind.

343
00:11:58,092 --> 00:11:59,635
Enough of this bullshit, Woody.

344
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,722
We both know that she's not paid
to do any job at Brickleberry.

345
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:03,723
Sure she is.

346
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:05,850
What job would you like, Amber?

347
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,476
I like the baby "aminals."

348
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,561
Good idea.

349
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:12,481
From now on, this is
the Amber Orphan "Aminal" Sanctuary,

350
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:13,858
and you're in charge.

351
00:12:13,941 --> 00:12:15,693
Woody, you can't do that.

352
00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:17,778
Already done!
Now cut out, Nanny Mcphee.

353
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,363
You're bringing down the party.

354
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:21,574
Can I get something strong?

355
00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:23,159
Beat it, sea world.

356
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:26,787
Oh Connie, are you putting up

357
00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:28,414
more cameras in my cabin?

358
00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:29,915
No, I'm taking them down.

359
00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:31,709
I'm putting them up in Amber's cabin.

360
00:12:31,792 --> 00:12:32,752
Sorry, Ethel.

361
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:34,712
It's not you, it's me.

362
00:12:34,795 --> 00:12:36,630
I like hot chicks.

363
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,549
Hello, low point.

364
00:12:38,632 --> 00:12:39,842
What am I gonna do, Malloy?

365
00:12:39,925 --> 00:12:42,178
Because she's so hot,
I've lost all my animals.

366
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,596
Including Connie.

367
00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:45,890
She'll kill them all
if I don't do something drastic.

368
00:12:45,973 --> 00:12:46,807
Like what?

369
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,684
If it's looks they want,

370
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,936
it's looks they'll get.

371
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:54,440
Hmm, plastic surgery.

372
00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:55,483
But why, Ethel?

373
00:12:55,566 --> 00:12:56,692
You're so...

374
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:57,818
Slightly above average.

375
00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,153
I need to be a ten.

376
00:12:59,236 --> 00:13:01,363
Give me the "I Hate Myself" special.

377
00:13:03,824 --> 00:13:06,744
[Smooth, funky music]

378
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,078
♪ ♪

379
00:13:08,162 --> 00:13:10,122
Hello, boys.

380
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,540
Holy crap.

381
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,459
Did you get stung by a jellyfish?

382
00:13:13,542 --> 00:13:17,254
Oops!
I got to pick up these pencils.

383
00:13:17,338 --> 00:13:19,089
No. no!

384
00:13:19,173 --> 00:13:21,342
How's about you put me back in charge

385
00:13:21,425 --> 00:13:23,135
of my orphan animals?

386
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,637
How about I put you in charge

387
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,597
in getting your nipples
away from me?

388
00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:27,515
What?

389
00:13:27,598 --> 00:13:29,350
I'm hot. I'm a ten.

390
00:13:29,433 --> 00:13:31,393
I guess that makes Connie a 13.

391
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:32,812
Look, scare-a reid.

392
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:34,188
As long as Amber's around,

393
00:13:34,271 --> 00:13:36,357
she's in charge of the "aminals"!

394
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:39,777
Aww... Look how happy he is
since I took over.

395
00:13:39,860 --> 00:13:41,779
I got to buy some more pills.

396
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:44,532
The red kitty dogs love them.

397
00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:47,034
Fly away, God's creature.

398
00:13:47,117 --> 00:13:48,869
Yay!

399
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,621
Now there's two kitty dogs.

400
00:13:50,704 --> 00:13:52,498
[Screams]
[Popping, deflating]

401
00:13:53,749 --> 00:13:55,251
So far this has been pretty easy.

402
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:56,544
Gotta say, Malloy,

403
00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:59,171
I think my mom put out
for absolutely no reason.

404
00:13:59,255 --> 00:14:01,382
I could have done
all of this myself.

405
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:02,508
Williams!

406
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:04,385
You dead man, you [bleep] dick!,

407
00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:07,638
Jimmy Wisniewski?
The bully from my childhood?

408
00:14:07,721 --> 00:14:09,890
You haven't picked on me
since the 7th grade.

409
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,059
That's right Williams,
and the only reasons

410
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:13,310
I stop picking on you is because...

411
00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:14,478
My mom?

412
00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:16,021
But we were 12!

413
00:14:16,105 --> 00:14:17,898
She started screw up like a 13-year-old,

414
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:19,066
[Bleep] dick!

415
00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:21,193
Wait, she's been
sleeping with you

416
00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:23,279
for the last 20 years?

417
00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:25,114
Every wednesday at 2:30 p.m.,

418
00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:26,782
but she just cut me off,

419
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,325
a beat-down coming.

420
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:30,953
Meet me at the flagpole
at sundown, dingus!

421
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:33,330
Are you sure we can't
work something else out?

422
00:14:33,414 --> 00:14:37,543
You know,
I have my mom's tiny, soft hands.

423
00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:39,169
Good, they'll be
easier to break,

424
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:40,880
you [bleep] dick!

425
00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,631
Damn, I'm loving it here,

426
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:45,175
and I've never felt less crazy
than I do right now,

427
00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:46,594
chillin' with my new friends,

428
00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,429
spaghettI owl, Turtle-ini,

429
00:14:48,512 --> 00:14:49,847
and Beaver-oni.

430
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,766
I'm so happy to have all you
talking Italian-food animals

431
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,351
to keep me from going nuts
up here.

432
00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:56,145
Hey, want to blaze-a one?

433
00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:57,438
Hell, yeah!

434
00:14:57,521 --> 00:15:00,649
Smart-ass shit up
FettuccinI Al-Frogo.

435
00:15:01,775 --> 00:15:03,360
Hi, I'm looking
to hire a hit man

436
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:05,654
to kill a female park ranger
named Amber.

437
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:06,906
Why would I want
to kill Amber?

438
00:15:06,989 --> 00:15:08,240
She's hot as balls.

439
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:09,825
Woody, is that you?

440
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:12,369
Do you have a side business
as a hit man?

441
00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:13,662
Hit man? No.

442
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,581
This isn't Woody Johnson.

443
00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:17,124
It's Judy Wonson.

444
00:15:17,207 --> 00:15:18,375
I'm... [High-Pitched]
A woman.

445
00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:20,836
Oh, I better go make
a tuna casserole

446
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,713
and douche the ol' clam.

447
00:15:22,796 --> 00:15:24,089
I'm a woman.

448
00:15:27,009 --> 00:15:29,136
Aww screw it!
I'll do it myself.

449
00:15:30,638 --> 00:15:31,639
[Gasps]

450
00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,307
Oh!

451
00:15:33,390 --> 00:15:34,725
Now I get it.

452
00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:36,018
[Rustling]

453
00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:39,104
Ethel, what are you doing here?

454
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:43,359
Something I've wanted to do
from the minute you got here.

455
00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:46,403
God damn, you are hot.

456
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:50,032
[Both moaning]

457
00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:51,283
Oh, yeah.

458
00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:52,284
Oh, yeah.

459
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:53,285
Yeah.

460
00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:54,244
Oh, yeah.

461
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:55,913
Oh, my God.

462
00:15:55,996 --> 00:15:57,456
[Both moaning]

463
00:15:57,539 --> 00:15:59,208
Oh!

464
00:16:03,253 --> 00:16:05,047
[Gasps]

465
00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:06,465
Jesus Christ.

466
00:16:06,548 --> 00:16:08,342
I can't believe I fell for her too.

467
00:16:08,425 --> 00:16:10,344
But that ass is so...

468
00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:13,013
No, no, no.

469
00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:14,264
[Crying]

470
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,141
Amber, are you crying?

471
00:16:16,225 --> 00:16:17,977
I thought you're the only one here

472
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:20,562
that didn't look at me
like a piece of meat.

473
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:23,273
I'm sick of getting by
on my looks.

474
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:26,068
And because I never had
to work for anything,

475
00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:29,405
I suck at everything!

476
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,448
You could be a great ranger,

477
00:16:31,532 --> 00:16:33,701
and I can help you!

478
00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:34,952
Really?

479
00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:36,161
It's not about looks.

480
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:39,164
I know for a fact that you
have greatness inside of you.

481
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,041
You think so?

482
00:16:41,375 --> 00:16:42,960
Smell for yourself.

483
00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:45,671
I don't know, Malloy.

484
00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:47,214
Are you sure your plan
will work?

485
00:16:47,297 --> 00:16:48,257
Trust me.

486
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:49,925
It's the key to street fighting.

487
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:52,136
Don't worry, Wisniewski.

488
00:16:52,302 --> 00:16:54,513
I'll try not to kill you.

489
00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:56,390
Ha-Doo-Ken!

490
00:16:57,808 --> 00:16:59,768
Ha-Doo-Ken!

491
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:01,562
Something's wrong, Malloy.

492
00:17:01,687 --> 00:17:03,188
The fireballs
aren't coming out.

493
00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:04,732
Keep trying.

494
00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:05,858
Ha-Doo-Ken!

495
00:17:05,941 --> 00:17:06,859
Ha-Doo-Ken!

496
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:08,861
Uh, Sonic boom!

497
00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:09,987
Sonic boom!

498
00:17:10,070 --> 00:17:11,655
Uh, Yoga-Flame.

499
00:17:12,239 --> 00:17:15,492
[Groaning]

500
00:17:16,493 --> 00:17:17,911
Somebody help me!

501
00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:19,580
No, no.

502
00:17:19,663 --> 00:17:21,498
It's time to take control

503
00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:22,791
of my life!

504
00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:24,793
Steve, eat this power pellet.

505
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:25,878
Okay!

506
00:17:25,961 --> 00:17:28,338
[Gagging]

507
00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:32,426
You know what, I just realized
I forgot to pack any food.

508
00:17:32,509 --> 00:17:35,095
Well that, Denzel.
You know what they say.

509
00:17:35,179 --> 00:17:37,389
Whenever you feel hungry

510
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,558
or your tummy starts
to growl...

511
00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:43,062
♪ It helps to has some tasty friends ♪

512
00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:45,564
Like me, spaghetti owl!

513
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:48,525
All: ♪ Eat us, eat us ♪

514
00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:50,986
♪ With the tastiest friends around ♪

515
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:53,113
♪ Eat us, eat us ♪

516
00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:55,240
♪ No need to go into town ♪

517
00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:56,909
♪ Because when you've got friends who... ♪

518
00:17:56,992 --> 00:17:58,118
Jesus Christ!

519
00:17:58,202 --> 00:17:59,536
What the hell are you doing?

520
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:00,662
Ah!

521
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:02,498
My eye!
I'm blind!

522
00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:03,749
What have you done?

523
00:18:03,832 --> 00:18:05,709
You crazy bastard!

524
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:06,710
What?

525
00:18:06,794 --> 00:18:08,754
You were singing a song called eat us.

526
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:10,172
It was just a song.

527
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:11,632
We thought you're our friend,

528
00:18:11,715 --> 00:18:12,925
not a sick cannibal.

529
00:18:13,008 --> 00:18:14,343
But I was hungry,

530
00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:16,136
and you all made me out of pasta!

531
00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:17,596
What's wrong with you?

532
00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:19,681
My eye!
[Wailing]

533
00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:21,767
Let's teach him a lesson.

534
00:18:21,850 --> 00:18:22,935
We'll eat him.

535
00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:24,728
Get back, all of you!

536
00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:27,231
I'll torch every single one of
you delicious mother[bleep]s.

537
00:18:27,397 --> 00:18:29,399
Oh, man!

538
00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:31,068
Whoa!

539
00:18:31,151 --> 00:18:32,444
Oh, shi...

540
00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:35,739
Could you tell me
when he hits the ground?

541
00:18:35,823 --> 00:18:37,950
I'm no longer have a depth perception.

542
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,078
The coyote says...

543
00:18:41,161 --> 00:18:43,080
A-roo!

544
00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:44,623
That's right.

545
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:46,959
You're on your way
to being a great ranger.

546
00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:48,085
Yay!

547
00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:49,461
I think we're ready

548
00:18:49,545 --> 00:18:51,213
for the plant or animal coloring book.

549
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:52,589
Be right back.

550
00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:53,882
Oh, in the meantime,

551
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:56,135
study these forest flash cards.

552
00:18:58,053 --> 00:18:59,388
Oh, my God.

553
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:00,889
That's a...

554
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:07,729
Fiery! And it's right where
the sanctuary is!

555
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:09,231
This is it, Amber.

556
00:19:09,314 --> 00:19:12,609
It's time to be a great ranger.

557
00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,278
Amber, where'd you go?

558
00:19:14,361 --> 00:19:16,655
I was thinking we could
do arts and crafts next.

559
00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:18,615
We can work out on our scissoring.

560
00:19:18,699 --> 00:19:21,577
Did someone say,
"scissoring?"

561
00:19:24,371 --> 00:19:25,747
[Camera clicks]

562
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,166
You know Malloy, it feels good,

563
00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,334
to find let him take control of my life.

564
00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:30,544
What are you talking about?

565
00:19:30,627 --> 00:19:32,129
Your mom's been banging Wisniewski

566
00:19:32,212 --> 00:19:33,088
for a half an hour.

567
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,215
Suck that, you [bleep] dick.

568
00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,176
Yeah, but I called her.

569
00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:38,510
It was my decision.

570
00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:40,262
That's taking control.

571
00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:42,097
Next week, regular time?

572
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:46,894
Mom, I now realize

573
00:19:46,977 --> 00:19:49,313
that you were only banging
everyone because you love me.

574
00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:51,565
Thanks for [bleep]-ing my life up.

575
00:19:51,648 --> 00:19:54,526
All the way to the top.

576
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,820
Top of the world, Steve.

577
00:19:56,904 --> 00:19:59,531
You're a fat poor ranger
and your mom's a dirty whore.

578
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:02,910
Amber!
Amber?

579
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,286
Has anyone seen Amber?

580
00:20:04,369 --> 00:20:05,787
Ethel, I...

581
00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:07,289
I think we lost her.

582
00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:09,208
I did it!

583
00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:11,335
I saved them!

584
00:20:11,418 --> 00:20:13,045
Whoa.

585
00:20:13,128 --> 00:20:15,297
Did I get burned a little?

586
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:17,216
I can't really feel anything.

587
00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:20,135
It's not... Bad.

588
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:21,178
Here.

589
00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:22,679
Ooh, much better.

590
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,264
You were right, Ethel.

591
00:20:24,348 --> 00:20:26,308
I can be a great ranger.

592
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:28,518
So, um...

593
00:20:28,602 --> 00:20:31,230
Thank you for your bravery, and, um...

594
00:20:31,313 --> 00:20:32,272
Amber, you're fired.

595
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:33,482
Oh!

596
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,442
Because I have a couple of burns?

597
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:37,569
No, because I can see
through your face.

598
00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:40,030
Ethel, tell them what you told me,

599
00:20:40,113 --> 00:20:41,740
that it's not about looks.

600
00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:44,326
It's abourt what's on the inside.

601
00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:46,203
You know what, Woody?
Amber's right.

602
00:20:46,286 --> 00:20:47,371
Looks or no looks,

603
00:20:47,454 --> 00:20:49,331
she does belong at Brickleberry.

604
00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,333
And I know the perfect place for her.

605
00:20:51,792 --> 00:20:53,543
All: ♪ Eat us, eat us ♪

606
00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,963
♪ We're the tastiest
friends around ♪

607
00:20:56,046 --> 00:20:58,340
♪ Eat us, eat us ♪

608
00:20:58,423 --> 00:21:00,259
♪ No need to go into town ♪