1
00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,006
[ laughter ]
2
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:09,474
[ murr screaming ]
3
00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:11,009
[ laughter ]
4
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:11,944
[ screaming ]
5
00:00:13,147 --> 00:00:14,479
Let's just get this started.
6
00:00:14,481 --> 00:00:16,348
Are you [bleep]
kidding me?
7
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:17,616
Who's a good cat?
8
00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:18,550
[ laughter ]
9
00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:23,421
[ cymbals crash ]
10
00:00:23,423 --> 00:00:25,557
[ laughter ]
11
00:00:25,559 --> 00:00:28,360
Narrator: With special guest,
alf.
12
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,362
The best is yet to come.
13
00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:32,264
[ laughter ]
14
00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:35,767
Today, we're attempting
to give away tickets to events
15
00:00:35,769 --> 00:00:37,169
That we can no longer attend.
16
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:39,571
But these events will be
completely terrible,
17
00:00:39,573 --> 00:00:41,105
As they've been made up
by the other guys.
18
00:00:41,107 --> 00:00:43,107
The goal is to get someone
to attend the event,
19
00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:44,643
No matter how horrible
it sounds.
20
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:48,713
And if you can't get someone
to take these tickets, you lose.
21
00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:50,382
"impractical jokers:
The movie"?
22
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:52,117
Ha.
[ blows raspberry ]
23
00:00:56,991 --> 00:00:59,658
Murr: Alright, q,
we're back on the streets.
Yes.
24
00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:02,527
You have got some hot tickets
in that envelope, my friend.
25
00:01:02,529 --> 00:01:05,798
I did notice a gleam
in the two of yours eye today
26
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,799
As I was getting
my packet of tickets.
27
00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:11,803
That gleam's from just when sal
and I look at each other.
28
00:01:11,805 --> 00:01:14,072
When did that start?
About 10 minutes ago.
29
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,607
[ both laugh ]
30
00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,342
Here we go.
31
00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:18,811
Hey, stache,
32
00:01:18,813 --> 00:01:20,545
My wife can't go to --
stache.
33
00:01:20,547 --> 00:01:22,214
[ murr laughs ]
stache?
34
00:01:22,216 --> 00:01:25,417
Your opening line was,
"stache, my wife can't go."
35
00:01:25,419 --> 00:01:28,086
What does that mean?
What does it mean?
36
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,421
We've made no progress.
37
00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:31,756
This show started with you
calling somebody "mustache."
38
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,758
[ laughs ]
39
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,360
Sorry, mustache.
40
00:01:35,362 --> 00:01:36,695
Don't call me mustache.
41
00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,630
Alright, mustache. Don't call me
clown. That's all I'm saying.
42
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:39,964
It's still all I got.
43
00:01:39,966 --> 00:01:42,501
12 years later,
you're still doing it.
44
00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:44,569
Who's this guy?
45
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,438
-Hey.
-There you go, q.
46
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:47,906
Oh.
Hey, you know what?
47
00:01:47,908 --> 00:01:49,574
My buddy doug
just canceled on me.
48
00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:50,975
We had tickets
to something tonight,
49
00:01:50,977 --> 00:01:52,177
And I'm just going to
give them away completely free.
50
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,978
You want it?
51
00:01:53,980 --> 00:01:56,648
It's
"exhume america presents
52
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,250
Let's exhume
fred astaire."
53
00:01:58,252 --> 00:02:00,385
[ sal and murr laugh ]
54
00:02:00,387 --> 00:02:03,388
Have you heard about
exhume america yet?
55
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:04,656
No.
You didn't hear?
56
00:02:04,658 --> 00:02:07,459
They dug up marilyn monroe.
They exhumed her on stage.
57
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:08,827
So tonight's
fred astaire's turn.
58
00:02:11,065 --> 00:02:12,531
No, I live right here.
I live right up here.
59
00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,966
I'm here all the time.
60
00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:18,937
[ both laugh ]
61
00:02:18,939 --> 00:02:21,005
Sal: You're living in
the big six accounting firm?
62
00:02:21,007 --> 00:02:23,475
No, no, no, the building
right -- not in that --
63
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:25,143
Wow, you really know
this town, huh?
64
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,811
[ both laugh ]
65
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:28,046
You sure you don't
want the tickets?
66
00:02:29,015 --> 00:02:30,215
No.
67
00:02:30,217 --> 00:02:33,551
[ both laugh ]
68
00:02:33,553 --> 00:02:36,221
He busted your lies.
69
00:02:36,223 --> 00:02:37,555
Excuse me.
70
00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:39,023
My friend just
canceled on me.
71
00:02:39,025 --> 00:02:40,225
I got two tickets to something.
I'm just giving them away.
72
00:02:40,227 --> 00:02:42,160
I don't even want
money or anything.
73
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:46,231
Uh, the funeral of
monsignor francis j. Harris.
74
00:02:46,233 --> 00:02:48,366
[ laughs ]
75
00:02:48,368 --> 00:02:52,704
Tonight at saint mary's church.
No? No, can't make it tonight?
76
00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:55,207
It's a hot ticket, though.
It's three nights.
77
00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:59,778
Oh, well, the body probably
won't keep that long.
78
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:02,380
[ sal and murr laughing ]
79
00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:05,450
Terrible attempt.
All fails for q.
80
00:03:05,452 --> 00:03:08,320
How have I gotten no better at
this in a decade-plus?
81
00:03:08,322 --> 00:03:10,855
[ buzzer ]
82
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,391
Alright, sal's got
some hot tickets in his hand.
83
00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:15,193
Here we go.
84
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,463
Hey. Yeah, I can't use them.
I will see. Hold on.
85
00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:20,532
Hey, do you guys
want free tickets to a show?
86
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,066
I can't use them.
I'm just going to give away.
87
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:23,401
Can I call you back?
88
00:03:23,403 --> 00:03:24,268
Okay.
89
00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:25,003
Nice. Believable.
90
00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:27,472
My girlfriend
can't make it.
91
00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,007
Yeah, tonight,
like, three blocks over.
92
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:32,544
"tyler perry presents
katy perry and matthew perry,
93
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:34,479
Starring steve perry
and joe perry."
94
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,548
[ both laugh ]
95
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,350
All the perrys
under one roof.
96
00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:40,418
It's tyler perry
and katy perry?
97
00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:42,286
No, "tyler perry presents
katy perry
98
00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,623
And matthew perry starring
steve perry and joe perry."
99
00:03:44,625 --> 00:03:46,158
That's a lot of perrys.
Yeah.
100
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:47,025
Is this a prank?
101
00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,160
Yeah, it is.
Yeah.
102
00:03:48,162 --> 00:03:51,296
[ both laugh ]
103
00:03:51,298 --> 00:03:52,897
Excuse me, guys.
You want free tickets
104
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,566
To a show I can't go
to tonight?
105
00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:55,767
I got two tickets.
I just want to give them away.
106
00:03:57,437 --> 00:03:59,704
Q: Here we go.
107
00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:01,906
"gacy:
Just the clown stuff."
108
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,241
Have you heard --
oh, god.
109
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:06,578
It's going to be --
[ both laugh ]
110
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,513
Have you heard of it?
The doc?
111
00:04:08,515 --> 00:04:11,783
No, I haven't heard.
I've heard of gacy.
112
00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:13,718
This is the doc about him,
but it's not the murderings.
113
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:15,654
It's just the clown stuff.
So it's light.
114
00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:17,856
It's light.
It's, like, rated pg-13.
115
00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:20,058
A lot of people don't know
he was a really great clown.
116
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,259
For years, he was a clown,
117
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,927
And his sleight of hand
is unmatched.
118
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,462
Hella balloon animals
he makes, too.
119
00:04:24,464 --> 00:04:26,865
[ both laugh ]
120
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,733
It's tonight
if you want to go.
No.
121
00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:30,602
-Oh.
-Oh.
122
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:34,272
All that and nothing, sal.
I thought you had him.
123
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,273
Would you like tickets
to a show tonight?
124
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,875
I'm giving them away.
I can't make it.
125
00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:40,478
So it's "lil jon presents
turn down for when?"
126
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:41,613
[ q and murr laugh ]
127
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:44,348
Lil jon
plays a time traveler.
128
00:04:44,350 --> 00:04:45,617
Okay.
129
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,151
[ both laugh ]
130
00:04:47,153 --> 00:04:48,620
It's
"turn down for when?"
131
00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:50,422
"turn down for how"
is next spring.
132
00:04:50,424 --> 00:04:51,756
Why can't you go
anymore?
133
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,692
'cause my girlfriend
has to stay late at work.
134
00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:55,227
Really?
Yeah.
135
00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:57,629
I'd be like, "girl,
just get off of work."
136
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:58,630
She's a piece of shit,
but it's alright.
137
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:01,299
[ laughs ]
138
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,301
Thanks. I appreciate it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
139
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,370
Get crunk tonight, though.
You got to do it.
I will.
140
00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:06,438
Murr: She got it.
141
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,773
Till the sweat drops
down your balls. Okay?
142
00:05:08,775 --> 00:05:10,676
[ q and murr laughing ]
143
00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:14,112
-What?
-Here we go.
144
00:05:14,114 --> 00:05:15,313
Your flight's canceled?
145
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,181
But we got
these tickets for tonight, babe.
146
00:05:17,183 --> 00:05:18,716
Q: Alright, go ahead, murr.
147
00:05:18,718 --> 00:05:20,652
Alright. I love you.
Bye.
148
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:23,521
Buddy, can I ask you a question?
My wife just canceled on me.
149
00:05:23,523 --> 00:05:24,789
We're going to see
a show tonight.
150
00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,658
Do you want tickets?
It's free. Take them.
151
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,326
It's a great show.
152
00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:30,061
It's "murr live!"?
153
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,530
[ both laugh ]
154
00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:34,732
Q: Your own show.
155
00:05:34,734 --> 00:05:36,534
Do you know what
"murr live!" is?
No, I don't.
156
00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:37,802
You don't know who murr is?
157
00:05:37,804 --> 00:05:39,003
He's like a really
famous comedian.
158
00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:41,139
He's very, very funny.
Bald.
159
00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:43,875
[ both laugh ]
160
00:05:43,877 --> 00:05:46,210
You don't know murr?
161
00:05:46,212 --> 00:05:49,547
Alright.
[ both laugh ]
162
00:05:49,549 --> 00:05:51,483
Sal:
Murr, walk up to that lady
that's scratching her back
163
00:05:51,485 --> 00:05:53,485
And go, "excuse me, I noticed
you was scratching your back
164
00:05:53,487 --> 00:05:54,686
With the puerto rican flag.
165
00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:56,154
Would you like
free tickets tonight?"
166
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:57,422
[ q laughs ]
167
00:05:57,424 --> 00:05:59,223
Excuse me.
I noticed you're scratching
168
00:05:59,225 --> 00:06:00,759
Your back
with the puerto rican day flag.
169
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,827
[ sal and q laugh ]
170
00:06:02,829 --> 00:06:04,696
Puerto rican day flag?
171
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:06,030
Would you like these
free tickets to a show?
172
00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:07,899
My wife can't make it.
For what?
173
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,568
The name of it is
"void, void, void, void.
174
00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:12,370
Sample ticket.
Do not sell.
175
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,038
Void, void, void, void."
176
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,840
You're going to love it.
177
00:06:15,842 --> 00:06:17,375
You're not going to make it?
No.
178
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,910
[ both laugh ]
179
00:06:18,912 --> 00:06:20,645
I mean, it's free.
I know, I know.
180
00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:21,713
Take them.
They're going to have
181
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:24,516
Free spaghetti dinner
here also.
182
00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:26,784
Free spaghetti dinner?
Yeah.
183
00:06:26,786 --> 00:06:29,053
I don't know
if I can compete with that.
184
00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:31,856
Murr, murr, slap your arm and
go, "ah, I just got bit."
185
00:06:31,858 --> 00:06:33,858
Ah! I just got bit.
186
00:06:33,860 --> 00:06:35,259
Can you get it?
It's right there.
187
00:06:35,261 --> 00:06:36,528
Down below the shoulder --
there you go.
188
00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,563
[ both laugh ]
189
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,200
That's it. That's it.
It's lower. Lower.
190
00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:45,069
Yeah. Get the puerto rican flag
down there. That's it.
191
00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,405
You got it. Yes.
192
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,140
You sure you don't
want them?
193
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:50,475
Ah, well. Thanks.
194
00:06:50,477 --> 00:06:52,010
[ laughs ]
195
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:53,878
Guys,
I'm sorry.
196
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,147
My wife just canceled
on me for tonight.
197
00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:56,881
Do you want these tickets?
I can't use them.
198
00:06:56,883 --> 00:06:59,283
The show is, uh...
-Here we go.
199
00:06:59,285 --> 00:07:01,686
..."jersey city..."
[ chuckles ]
200
00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:04,156
[ sal and q laughing ]
201
00:07:06,868 --> 00:07:08,868
Murr: Do you want these tickets?
I can't use them.
202
00:07:08,870 --> 00:07:11,270
The show is, uh...
-Alright. Here we go.
203
00:07:11,272 --> 00:07:13,406
..."jersey city..."
[ chuckles ]
204
00:07:13,408 --> 00:07:15,341
[ q laughing ]
205
00:07:15,343 --> 00:07:17,410
The show is
"jersey city [bleep]-fest."
206
00:07:17,412 --> 00:07:20,546
[ sal and q laughing ]
207
00:07:20,548 --> 00:07:21,747
Why would he say that?
208
00:07:21,749 --> 00:07:22,882
It's a great show.
209
00:07:22,884 --> 00:07:25,685
It's the "jersey city
[bleep]-fest." it's great.
210
00:07:25,687 --> 00:07:27,687
Everybody gets together.
It's a great party.
211
00:07:27,689 --> 00:07:28,688
It's like a rave.
212
00:07:28,690 --> 00:07:31,357
They only do one
[bleep]-fest a year.
213
00:07:31,359 --> 00:07:33,626
They only do one
[bleep]-fest a year.
214
00:07:33,628 --> 00:07:35,695
And it's tonight.
215
00:07:35,697 --> 00:07:36,962
Yes, totally.
216
00:07:36,964 --> 00:07:38,698
You've heard
of oktoberfest, right?
Yes.
217
00:07:38,700 --> 00:07:40,900
This is like the jersey city
version of that.
218
00:07:40,902 --> 00:07:43,636
But it's a [bleep]-fest.
219
00:07:43,638 --> 00:07:45,238
-Okay.
-Where are they from?
220
00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,240
Where are you from?
221
00:07:47,242 --> 00:07:50,109
It's a [bleep]-fest.
A [bleep]-fest.
222
00:07:50,111 --> 00:07:52,778
You guys in Italy
don't have, like [bleep]-fests?
223
00:07:52,780 --> 00:07:54,714
No.
No.
224
00:07:54,716 --> 00:07:56,516
There's no [bleep]-fest?
225
00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:57,583
Well, take them.
226
00:07:57,585 --> 00:07:59,318
Jersey city's
a great town.
227
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,654
It's the next town over.
The show's tonight.
228
00:08:01,656 --> 00:08:04,323
If she takes "jersey city
[bleep]-fest" tickets...
229
00:08:04,325 --> 00:08:06,592
Take them. They're free.
Put them to good use.
230
00:08:06,594 --> 00:08:08,261
Give them to somebody.
I don't care.
231
00:08:08,263 --> 00:08:09,929
Yeah, go ahead.
There you go.
232
00:08:09,931 --> 00:08:11,130
Whoa!
233
00:08:11,132 --> 00:08:13,132
Now that I'm married,
I go to less [bleep]-fests.
234
00:08:13,134 --> 00:08:15,201
But the jersey city one
is the best [bleep]-fest
235
00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,737
On the east coast.
236
00:08:17,739 --> 00:08:20,139
[ both laugh ]
237
00:08:20,141 --> 00:08:21,474
Ciao.
238
00:08:21,476 --> 00:08:25,010
[ sal and q laughing ]
239
00:08:25,012 --> 00:08:26,746
Narrator: Q took a loss on
his tickets,
240
00:08:26,748 --> 00:08:30,083
Making him first up
on the loser board.
241
00:08:30,085 --> 00:08:31,885
Today, we are
at dominican university,
242
00:08:31,887 --> 00:08:33,352
Sitting in a waiting room
243
00:08:33,354 --> 00:08:35,488
And having an over the top
conversation on our cellphones.
244
00:08:35,490 --> 00:08:38,758
After we hang up, we'll be given
the reason why we're so upset.
245
00:08:38,760 --> 00:08:40,893
The goal is to get the other
person in the waiting room
246
00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:43,028
To agree
that you didn't overreact.
247
00:08:43,030 --> 00:08:44,830
If they think you did,
you lose.
248
00:08:44,832 --> 00:08:48,902
I'm so overreacting!
249
00:08:48,904 --> 00:08:50,270
It's actually just
how he acts.
250
00:08:54,309 --> 00:08:56,910
Don't look now,
but it's joffrey.
251
00:08:56,912 --> 00:08:58,311
[ sal and q laugh ]
252
00:08:58,313 --> 00:09:01,180
I'm joffrey!
Hmm?
253
00:09:01,182 --> 00:09:04,183
Cole, today, I think
you're actually chauncey.
254
00:09:04,185 --> 00:09:05,718
Sal:
Ooh, I like chauncey.
255
00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:07,453
Alright,
you can grab a spot.
256
00:09:07,455 --> 00:09:09,255
Here we go, murr.
Incoming.
257
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,123
[ cellphone vibrates ]
258
00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:11,124
Hello?
259
00:09:11,126 --> 00:09:12,725
Okay, murr,
let's see you overreact.
260
00:09:12,727 --> 00:09:16,729
You've got to be kidding me.
This is devastating.
261
00:09:16,731 --> 00:09:18,864
[ sal and q laugh ]
262
00:09:18,866 --> 00:09:20,399
[ voice breaking ]
there's people in here.
263
00:09:20,401 --> 00:09:22,267
I can't talk about this now.
264
00:09:22,269 --> 00:09:23,669
Really? You have to cut
the conversation.
265
00:09:23,671 --> 00:09:25,138
I have to go.
I'm at work right now.
266
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:28,141
I can't talk --
fine. Fine.
267
00:09:28,143 --> 00:09:29,142
Wrong number.
268
00:09:29,144 --> 00:09:33,546
[ sal and q laugh ]
269
00:09:33,548 --> 00:09:35,815
Wrong number.
270
00:09:35,817 --> 00:09:36,882
[ laughs ]
271
00:09:36,884 --> 00:09:38,751
[ both laugh ]
272
00:09:38,753 --> 00:09:40,419
Why would the wrong
number call me?
273
00:09:40,421 --> 00:09:43,088
I'm at work right now.
It's not right.
274
00:09:43,090 --> 00:09:45,891
Well, listen, if a wrong number
gets you that way,
275
00:09:45,893 --> 00:09:47,360
Imagine if it
was really bad news.
276
00:09:47,362 --> 00:09:49,695
Sal: Oh, I think he's saying
he overreacted.
277
00:09:49,697 --> 00:09:51,964
Why did the person not
double-check the number
278
00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:53,098
Before they called me?
Why don't you just say,
279
00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:54,900
"hey, wrong number.
See you later"?
280
00:09:54,902 --> 00:09:57,770
[ both laugh ]
281
00:09:57,772 --> 00:09:59,505
Any advice
how I can calm down?
282
00:09:59,507 --> 00:10:01,907
Like, it just upsets me so much
that somebody calls --
yeah, smoke weed.
283
00:10:01,909 --> 00:10:02,908
Smoke weed.
284
00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:04,043
Smoke weed?
Yeah.
285
00:10:04,045 --> 00:10:06,379
Oh, come on.
Alright. Hey.
286
00:10:06,381 --> 00:10:08,181
You got
the right guys back here.
287
00:10:08,183 --> 00:10:09,182
Give this guy
my number.
288
00:10:09,184 --> 00:10:10,850
I didn't overreact,
did I?
289
00:10:10,852 --> 00:10:12,518
If a wrong number
upsets you like that,
290
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,652
You have a right
to be upset.
291
00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:16,455
Oh-ho-ho! You got
what you needed, buddy.
292
00:10:16,457 --> 00:10:17,790
He sided with you.
293
00:10:17,792 --> 00:10:21,527
Well, I'm chauncey, and I think
that was an overreaction.
294
00:10:21,529 --> 00:10:23,663
Chauncey,
that's not my opinion, buddy.
295
00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:25,598
[ sal and q laugh ]
296
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:28,267
Q: Ding, ding, ding.
Here you go.
297
00:10:28,269 --> 00:10:30,936
♪ whose phone is ringing ♪
♪ mine, mine ♪
298
00:10:30,938 --> 00:10:34,340
♪ whose phone is ringing ♪
♪ mine, mine ♪
299
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:36,609
♪ whose -- ♪
hello?
300
00:10:40,548 --> 00:10:43,082
Murr: Oh, there's the turn.
301
00:10:43,084 --> 00:10:44,684
Q: He's good at this.
302
00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:46,285
He cried on command once.
303
00:10:46,287 --> 00:10:49,722
Well, he's always a step away
from crying, so that's not hard.
304
00:10:51,826 --> 00:10:54,227
Do you think it's okay?
305
00:10:54,229 --> 00:10:56,495
You think that's okay
to do?
306
00:10:56,497 --> 00:10:58,964
Murr: Uh, uh, she just shot
you a look.
307
00:10:58,966 --> 00:11:02,435
This --
this can't be happening again.
308
00:11:02,437 --> 00:11:07,172
Listen to me.
Hear my words.
309
00:11:07,174 --> 00:11:10,843
This is the last time.
It's the last time.
310
00:11:10,845 --> 00:11:12,778
Goodbye.
311
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:14,447
The mcrib is back.
312
00:11:14,449 --> 00:11:16,115
[ murr and q laugh ]
313
00:11:16,117 --> 00:11:18,851
The mcrib is back.
314
00:11:18,853 --> 00:11:22,655
[ murr and q laughing ]
315
00:11:22,657 --> 00:11:25,190
It keeps coming back.
316
00:11:25,192 --> 00:11:27,793
I can't take it.
Oh.
317
00:11:27,795 --> 00:11:32,131
It just keeps coming back.
I think it's going to go,
318
00:11:32,133 --> 00:11:33,732
And then it comes back.
319
00:11:33,734 --> 00:11:36,602
It's like it's seasonal, but
they don't say it's seasonal.
320
00:11:36,604 --> 00:11:39,204
[ murr and q laugh ]
321
00:11:39,206 --> 00:11:41,074
That was mcdonald's.
322
00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:42,341
[ both laugh ]
323
00:11:42,343 --> 00:11:43,476
It was a marketing call.
324
00:11:43,478 --> 00:11:45,878
It was a marketing call.
325
00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,680
I sell the buns,
you know?
326
00:11:47,682 --> 00:11:50,283
Really?
My friends call me
sally buns.
327
00:11:50,285 --> 00:11:51,550
Sally buns.
328
00:11:51,552 --> 00:11:53,486
My name's sal.
Murr: My last name's buns.
329
00:11:53,488 --> 00:11:55,554
My last name is buns.
330
00:11:55,556 --> 00:11:57,090
They just call him
by his name.
331
00:11:57,092 --> 00:11:59,091
It's a good business
to get into, then.
It's a wild coincidence.
Yeah.
332
00:11:59,093 --> 00:12:01,160
[ both laugh ]
333
00:12:01,162 --> 00:12:03,629
The thing is, with the mcrib,
you know the shape of it, right?
Mm-hmm.
334
00:12:03,631 --> 00:12:06,098
So the buns
need to be oblong.
Mm-hmm.
335
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,833
They're hard to make.
336
00:12:07,835 --> 00:12:10,102
Why are they
hard to make?
337
00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:12,305
Because you need
a special machinery for it.
338
00:12:12,307 --> 00:12:15,775
And every time
they tell me it's gone,
339
00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:17,242
I throw the machine out.
340
00:12:17,244 --> 00:12:18,577
It's a $120,000 machine.
341
00:12:18,579 --> 00:12:21,046
Just to make
slightly different bread.
342
00:12:21,048 --> 00:12:24,783
I have spent over
half a million dollars
343
00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:26,652
On mcrib bun machines.
344
00:12:29,190 --> 00:12:30,856
[ q and murr laugh ]
345
00:12:30,858 --> 00:12:33,392
Sal --
"I am so mcpissed."
346
00:12:33,394 --> 00:12:35,528
I am mc-[bleep]ing-mad.
347
00:12:35,530 --> 00:12:36,796
[ q and murr laugh ]
348
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:41,667
-The mcballs on them.
-The mcballs on them.
349
00:12:41,669 --> 00:12:43,402
Murr: Did I
mcoverreact?
350
00:12:43,404 --> 00:12:46,872
[ q and murr laughing ]
351
00:12:46,874 --> 00:12:49,274
Do you think I overreacted?
No.
352
00:12:49,276 --> 00:12:50,475
Whoa!
Oh!
353
00:12:50,477 --> 00:12:52,211
I've never tried a mcrib.
Never will.
354
00:12:52,213 --> 00:12:54,013
No?
Not after today.
355
00:12:54,015 --> 00:12:56,281
Not after today? Well, thank you
so, so goddamn much.
356
00:12:56,283 --> 00:12:59,018
I like the mcrib.
I'm glad it's back out.
357
00:12:59,020 --> 00:13:00,886
Do you know how much longer
I have to mc-[bleep]ing-wait?
358
00:13:00,888 --> 00:13:02,688
You could probably
just go home.
359
00:13:02,690 --> 00:13:04,423
It's a mcrib focus group.
360
00:13:04,425 --> 00:13:05,490
Okay.
361
00:13:05,492 --> 00:13:07,960
[ q and murr laughing ]
362
00:13:07,962 --> 00:13:10,229
Hi.
Hi.
363
00:13:10,231 --> 00:13:13,498
Alright.
You know this old chestnut.
364
00:13:13,500 --> 00:13:14,633
[ cellphone playing
"ode to joy" ]
oh.
365
00:13:14,635 --> 00:13:18,303
Uh-oh. Oh, wow.
How rude.
[ chuckles ]
366
00:13:18,305 --> 00:13:20,506
Hey. Yell-o.
367
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:21,908
Hey, bud.
368
00:13:23,510 --> 00:13:24,977
Murr: Uh-oh.
Sal: Oh, no.
369
00:13:24,979 --> 00:13:26,979
Uh-oh, q.
No, no.
370
00:13:26,981 --> 00:13:31,384
Just say that one more time.
Make sure I have it right.
371
00:13:31,386 --> 00:13:33,118
[ murr and sal laugh ]
372
00:13:33,120 --> 00:13:34,587
Listen to me.
373
00:13:34,589 --> 00:13:37,390
You don't want to make an enemy
out of me, okay?
374
00:13:37,392 --> 00:13:39,324
You already did it?
375
00:13:39,326 --> 00:13:42,527
No, I'm not living with that.
I got news for you, friend.
376
00:13:42,529 --> 00:13:44,063
You're not going to be living
with that much longer
377
00:13:44,065 --> 00:13:45,064
If you keep this up.
378
00:13:45,066 --> 00:13:46,932
-Hang up. Hang up.
-No, no, no, no, no.
379
00:13:46,934 --> 00:13:51,336
You'll be seeing me
real soon.
380
00:13:51,338 --> 00:13:52,572
My wife got bangs.
381
00:13:54,809 --> 00:13:56,409
Murr: She's got bangs.
382
00:13:56,411 --> 00:13:58,678
[ murr and sal laugh ]
383
00:14:01,314 --> 00:14:04,515
No, no, no, no, no.
You'll be seeing me real soon.
384
00:14:04,517 --> 00:14:06,317
My wife got bangs.
385
00:14:06,319 --> 00:14:08,053
[ murr and sal laugh ]
386
00:14:08,055 --> 00:14:09,221
Murr: She's got bangs.
387
00:14:13,860 --> 00:14:16,261
My wife got bangs.
388
00:14:16,263 --> 00:14:18,397
[ murr and sal laugh ]
389
00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:22,533
She cut her hair
into bangs, you mean?
She got bangs.
390
00:14:22,535 --> 00:14:23,668
And here's the thing.
391
00:14:23,670 --> 00:14:25,604
I go through the cycle
with her every five years.
392
00:14:25,606 --> 00:14:27,005
She wants bangs,
she gets bangs,
393
00:14:27,007 --> 00:14:29,074
Then she cries
'cause nobody
394
00:14:29,076 --> 00:14:31,476
Looks good with bangs.
395
00:14:31,478 --> 00:14:34,012
[ murr and sal laugh ]
396
00:14:34,014 --> 00:14:35,214
Sal: Look at
chauncey's face.
397
00:14:35,216 --> 00:14:38,417
Every woman I know
that gets bangs regrets bangs.
398
00:14:38,419 --> 00:14:40,952
Do you remember
that she has bangs?
399
00:14:40,954 --> 00:14:43,688
[ sobs ]
400
00:14:43,690 --> 00:14:44,889
Those aren't bangs, right?
401
00:14:44,891 --> 00:14:47,225
Yeah. These are bangs.
Oh, okay. Sorry.
402
00:14:47,227 --> 00:14:49,560
And I don't care
what you think of them, but --
403
00:14:49,562 --> 00:14:51,362
No, see, I don't look at those
as bangs.
404
00:14:51,364 --> 00:14:54,032
She gets those short ones that
look like an anime creature.
405
00:14:54,034 --> 00:14:56,635
Yeah, but don't you love her
regardless of, like, bangs?
406
00:14:56,637 --> 00:14:59,304
It's not like she, like,
got a facelift or something.
407
00:14:59,306 --> 00:15:01,973
[ murr and sal laugh ]
408
00:15:01,975 --> 00:15:03,775
You don't think I overreacted
to that, do you?
409
00:15:03,777 --> 00:15:05,710
Uh...
[ chuckles ]
410
00:15:05,712 --> 00:15:08,579
I wouldn't act that way.
Let's just put it that way.
411
00:15:08,581 --> 00:15:09,448
Murr: Wow.
412
00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:11,316
Yes. Overreacting.
413
00:15:11,318 --> 00:15:12,717
My girlfriend has bangs.
414
00:15:12,719 --> 00:15:14,052
How does she look?
Terrible.
415
00:15:14,054 --> 00:15:14,853
Yeah.
416
00:15:14,855 --> 00:15:16,588
[ murr and sal laugh ]
417
00:15:16,590 --> 00:15:18,523
I'm going to go outside
and smoke this plant.
418
00:15:18,525 --> 00:15:20,459
[ murr and sal laugh ]
419
00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:21,860
[bleep] you, joffrey.
420
00:15:21,862 --> 00:15:24,596
[ murr and sal laugh ]
421
00:15:24,598 --> 00:15:27,065
Narrator: Q blew things
out of proportion,
422
00:15:27,067 --> 00:15:29,868
So he's tonight's big loser.
423
00:15:29,870 --> 00:15:32,871
Oh, my god.
Today is a special day.
424
00:15:32,873 --> 00:15:34,939
I cannot believe
I'm saying this.
425
00:15:34,941 --> 00:15:37,608
This is ridiculous.
But we have, as a guest,
426
00:15:37,610 --> 00:15:40,745
Television legend
and celebrity chef, alf.
427
00:15:40,747 --> 00:15:43,748
Hi, alf.
Hi. Listen,
I heard you lost,
428
00:15:43,750 --> 00:15:47,018
And these guys want
to punish you, and I said no.
429
00:15:47,020 --> 00:15:49,420
No one's going to punish
my biggest fan.
430
00:15:49,422 --> 00:15:52,423
So instead, alf decided
to give you a reward.
431
00:15:52,425 --> 00:15:53,358
That's right.
432
00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,026
I got this new
cookbook out,
433
00:15:55,028 --> 00:15:59,297
And we are going to cook you
a melmacian feast.
434
00:15:59,299 --> 00:16:00,565
You lost.
This is your reward.
435
00:16:00,567 --> 00:16:02,633
You're welcome, buddy.
But here's the deal.
436
00:16:02,635 --> 00:16:04,569
We're not going to tell you
what's in each dish.
437
00:16:04,571 --> 00:16:07,172
We think it'd be more fun
if you try to figure it out.
438
00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:09,508
And I hope
you have a refined palate.
439
00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,976
There's going to be a lot of
different flavors happening
440
00:16:11,978 --> 00:16:15,046
In my mother's famous
slimeballs parmesan.
441
00:16:15,048 --> 00:16:16,647
[ laughter ]
442
00:16:16,649 --> 00:16:18,717
Can we bring out
the dish?
Q: Alright.
443
00:16:18,719 --> 00:16:19,985
Sal: Let's bring out
the slimeballs.
444
00:16:19,987 --> 00:16:21,786
One of my favorites.
445
00:16:21,788 --> 00:16:26,591
Murr: Q, it's a spaghetti
and slimeball.
446
00:16:26,593 --> 00:16:28,860
That looks
pretty good.
Sal: Yeah.
447
00:16:28,862 --> 00:16:30,995
You've got to eat this one
before it clots.
448
00:16:30,997 --> 00:16:32,663
Oh, god.
[ laughter ]
449
00:16:32,665 --> 00:16:35,734
Oh, man. I can't.
Yeah, you can,
and you will.
450
00:16:35,736 --> 00:16:37,736
Now, here's the deal. You're
going to take a bite of that
451
00:16:37,738 --> 00:16:39,338
And you're going to
try to tell us what's in it.
452
00:16:39,340 --> 00:16:40,338
And if you don't get it right,
453
00:16:40,340 --> 00:16:41,406
You're going
to take another bite.
454
00:16:41,408 --> 00:16:44,142
Alright.
[ clears throat ]
455
00:16:44,144 --> 00:16:45,210
[ whining ]
456
00:16:45,212 --> 00:16:46,811
Yeah, get the accouterment,
too. Not just the --
457
00:16:46,813 --> 00:16:47,946
Yeah, get the
whole thing.
458
00:16:47,948 --> 00:16:49,414
This is the part --
that's the
slimeball.
459
00:16:49,416 --> 00:16:50,415
Get a slimeball.
460
00:16:50,417 --> 00:16:52,417
You know,
these were all tested
461
00:16:52,419 --> 00:16:54,085
In a test kitchen.
462
00:16:54,087 --> 00:16:55,420
Here, though,
on this planet,
463
00:16:55,422 --> 00:16:57,356
I think you call it
a poison control center.
464
00:16:57,358 --> 00:16:59,424
[ laughter ]
465
00:16:59,426 --> 00:17:01,159
Oh, alf.
466
00:17:01,161 --> 00:17:03,128
Chomp, chomp.
Chomp, chomp.
467
00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:06,965
Ugh.
468
00:17:06,967 --> 00:17:08,233
What do you think?
469
00:17:12,839 --> 00:17:15,840
Obviously, spaghetti,
we got.
470
00:17:15,842 --> 00:17:16,975
The cherries, I got.
471
00:17:16,977 --> 00:17:18,577
It's the slimeball
that's a mystery.
472
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:22,781
First guess is, like,
a chicken liver?
473
00:17:22,783 --> 00:17:24,449
-That's disgusting.
-Yeah.
474
00:17:24,451 --> 00:17:27,252
[ laughter ]
475
00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:29,187
Is it a mollusk of some sort?
476
00:17:29,189 --> 00:17:31,790
Ah!
Ah!
477
00:17:31,792 --> 00:17:33,925
They have mollusks
on melmac.
478
00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:35,260
It crawls.
479
00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:37,929
This is escargot?
This is a slug?
480
00:17:37,931 --> 00:17:38,930
Oh.
481
00:17:38,932 --> 00:17:40,665
Yes, q,
the spaghetti and slimeball
482
00:17:40,667 --> 00:17:44,135
Is cherry pie filling, spaghetti
with red pepper flakes,
483
00:17:44,137 --> 00:17:46,337
And escargot.
Delicious.
484
00:17:46,339 --> 00:17:48,673
Well, can we escar-go
to the next plate?
Yes.
485
00:17:48,675 --> 00:17:49,674
Nice segue.
486
00:17:49,676 --> 00:17:51,943
Yeah.
Not bad, right?
Yeah.
487
00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:55,146
Oh, my gosh.
This looks great, q.
488
00:17:55,148 --> 00:17:56,481
This is one of alf's
specialties.
489
00:17:56,483 --> 00:17:59,017
It's disheveled
eggs.
Disheveled eggs.
490
00:17:59,019 --> 00:18:01,886
This is a reward.
Yeah.
491
00:18:01,888 --> 00:18:03,622
This is not a reward.
492
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:05,223
Alf made these dishes.
Are you kidding me?
493
00:18:05,225 --> 00:18:06,491
This is a reward,
my friend.
494
00:18:06,493 --> 00:18:08,093
Well, I didn't
make them personally.
495
00:18:08,095 --> 00:18:10,428
We have a chef in the back.
He's an italian guy.
496
00:18:10,430 --> 00:18:12,097
Sal monella.
497
00:18:12,099 --> 00:18:15,500
[ laughter ]
498
00:18:15,502 --> 00:18:17,436
So eat that.
Come on, hurry up.
Alright.
499
00:18:17,438 --> 00:18:19,037
Okay.
500
00:18:19,039 --> 00:18:21,306
Hoo.
It's stinks.
501
00:18:21,308 --> 00:18:23,508
-Oh. Oh.
-Q.
502
00:18:23,510 --> 00:18:25,043
Q: I'm gonna throw up
already.
503
00:18:25,045 --> 00:18:26,111
Check, please.
504
00:18:26,113 --> 00:18:27,846
[ sal laughs ]
505
00:18:29,925 --> 00:18:33,293
Hoo! It stinks.
Alright. Okay.
506
00:18:35,596 --> 00:18:36,863
Murr: Q.
I'm gonna throw up
already.
507
00:18:36,865 --> 00:18:38,331
[ gags ]
508
00:18:38,333 --> 00:18:40,600
Check, please.
[ laughs ]
509
00:18:40,602 --> 00:18:42,335
Just tell us
the ingredients, babe.
510
00:18:42,337 --> 00:18:43,470
That's all you got to do.
511
00:18:43,472 --> 00:18:45,939
Obviously, we got
anchovy of some sort
512
00:18:45,941 --> 00:18:47,274
On top of an egg.
513
00:18:47,276 --> 00:18:48,741
Yeah.
514
00:18:48,743 --> 00:18:50,009
Is this fish food?
515
00:18:50,011 --> 00:18:52,879
It's got
some fish food.
516
00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:55,214
What do you taste in there
for the yolk?
517
00:18:55,216 --> 00:18:56,749
It just tastes like fish.
518
00:18:56,751 --> 00:18:59,286
What you have here
is an egg yolk
519
00:18:59,288 --> 00:19:01,087
Made of toothpaste,
my friend.
520
00:19:01,089 --> 00:19:05,492
Toothpaste?
Yeah.
Yellow toothpaste.
521
00:19:05,494 --> 00:19:07,160
I'm hoping
you're enjoying it.
522
00:19:07,162 --> 00:19:09,696
I'm loving it.
Yeah.
Then we have more.
523
00:19:09,698 --> 00:19:11,764
Oh, thank you.
524
00:19:11,766 --> 00:19:12,699
Maybe we could start, like,
525
00:19:12,701 --> 00:19:15,301
A line of frozen,
like, at-home dinners?
526
00:19:15,303 --> 00:19:16,769
Absolutely.
Yeah?
527
00:19:16,771 --> 00:19:19,906
I'm not the only chef
named gordon that sold out.
528
00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:21,708
[ laughter ]
529
00:19:21,710 --> 00:19:22,975
Shots fired.
530
00:19:22,977 --> 00:19:24,377
Oh.
Alright,
let's see
531
00:19:24,379 --> 00:19:26,112
What you do
with the next thing.
532
00:19:26,114 --> 00:19:28,381
What?
What the [bleep] is this?
533
00:19:28,383 --> 00:19:30,783
This is a melmacian
classic.
534
00:19:30,785 --> 00:19:32,785
Murr: It's what
alf calls tongues casino.
535
00:19:32,787 --> 00:19:34,587
Right.
As they say on your planet,
536
00:19:34,589 --> 00:19:36,055
"mangia."
537
00:19:36,057 --> 00:19:38,858
Oh, no.
538
00:19:38,860 --> 00:19:40,393
Oh. Q
539
00:19:40,395 --> 00:19:42,128
Oh.
540
00:19:42,130 --> 00:19:44,397
Oh, god.
541
00:19:48,336 --> 00:19:50,537
Alf, I've never tried
this delicacy.
542
00:19:50,539 --> 00:19:53,673
I have heard, though,
it tastes pretty good.
543
00:19:53,675 --> 00:19:55,675
The first person I dated
in my life
544
00:19:55,677 --> 00:19:58,144
Used to eat it all the time,
and then we'd make out afterward
545
00:19:58,146 --> 00:20:00,679
And I would be
grossed out.
546
00:20:00,681 --> 00:20:02,882
That's...
547
00:20:02,884 --> 00:20:05,618
Just carry on.
Carry on.
548
00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:09,622
Carry on.
I shouldn't have told the tale.
549
00:20:09,624 --> 00:20:12,358
I can't swallow.
550
00:20:12,360 --> 00:20:13,893
Want something to wash
it down?
551
00:20:13,895 --> 00:20:16,362
Yes.
Saliva.
552
00:20:16,364 --> 00:20:17,964
Alright. What is this?
Cow tongue?
553
00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:20,699
Yes!
Very good, q!
554
00:20:20,701 --> 00:20:22,101
It's cow tongue.
555
00:20:22,103 --> 00:20:25,171
The best is
yet to come.
556
00:20:25,173 --> 00:20:27,306
Q, what we have
here for you
557
00:20:27,308 --> 00:20:29,609
Is alf's garden pizza.
558
00:20:32,113 --> 00:20:35,782
Garden of melmac.
Garden of melmac
pizza?
559
00:20:35,784 --> 00:20:36,849
Oh, lord.
560
00:20:36,851 --> 00:20:38,251
Dig right in there.
Dig right in there.
561
00:20:38,253 --> 00:20:40,887
Yeah.
Come on. Don't be shy.
562
00:20:42,723 --> 00:20:43,856
[ laughs ]
563
00:20:43,858 --> 00:20:46,058
You know he's enjoying this.
Yes.
564
00:20:46,060 --> 00:20:49,195
Yeah.
That is very attractive.
565
00:20:49,197 --> 00:20:51,464
[ gags ]
566
00:20:53,134 --> 00:20:54,867
Mm.
567
00:20:54,869 --> 00:20:58,004
Are you going to
play a tune?
568
00:20:58,006 --> 00:21:00,940
[ gags ]
uh-oh.
I take it he likes it?
569
00:21:00,942 --> 00:21:03,676
That's right.
He loves it.
570
00:21:03,678 --> 00:21:04,877
Ugh.
571
00:21:04,879 --> 00:21:06,479
So what are
you thinking?
Alright.
572
00:21:06,481 --> 00:21:09,482
First of all,
it's delicious.
573
00:21:09,484 --> 00:21:11,951
[ laughter ]
574
00:21:11,953 --> 00:21:13,486
Another winner.
575
00:21:13,488 --> 00:21:16,423
Alright, obviously,
we have some grass.
576
00:21:16,425 --> 00:21:17,624
That's right.
577
00:21:17,626 --> 00:21:18,825
We do have grass
in the garden.
Okay.
578
00:21:18,827 --> 00:21:20,627
And then this
is what was getting me.
579
00:21:20,629 --> 00:21:23,296
The shell
of whatever this bug is.
580
00:21:23,298 --> 00:21:26,699
I don't know.
Is this crickets?
Yes, it is.
581
00:21:26,701 --> 00:21:29,101
You have pizza sauce,
grass,
582
00:21:29,103 --> 00:21:30,437
And grasshoppers.
583
00:21:30,439 --> 00:21:32,371
Alright, q,
one final dish, bud.
584
00:21:32,373 --> 00:21:33,706
You're doing great.
585
00:21:33,708 --> 00:21:35,441
I just want to give you
a warning.
Okay.
586
00:21:35,443 --> 00:21:37,910
This is going to change
your whole perspective.
587
00:21:37,912 --> 00:21:39,111
Is it really?
Yeah.
588
00:21:39,113 --> 00:21:42,449
You're not going to want
to do this show anymore.
589
00:21:42,451 --> 00:21:44,450
I hear the fire
department's hiring.
590
00:21:44,452 --> 00:21:46,486
[ laughter ]
591
00:21:51,259 --> 00:21:52,925
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
592
00:21:52,927 --> 00:21:54,994
And where does this recipe
come from?
593
00:21:54,996 --> 00:21:55,995
Again, melmac.
594
00:21:55,997 --> 00:21:58,098
[ laughter ]
595
00:22:00,201 --> 00:22:01,468
Get that in there.
596
00:22:01,470 --> 00:22:02,801
Uh-oh.
597
00:22:02,803 --> 00:22:05,071
One final dish.
Everything with everything.
598
00:22:05,073 --> 00:22:06,605
How many ingredients
are in this?
599
00:22:06,607 --> 00:22:08,475
It doesn't really
matter.
600
00:22:08,477 --> 00:22:10,076
[ sal laughs ]
601
00:22:10,078 --> 00:22:13,513
Oh, my. Yeah.
602
00:22:16,017 --> 00:22:19,018
Don't overblend it.
603
00:22:19,020 --> 00:22:23,622
There's still needs to be
little lumps in it.
604
00:22:23,624 --> 00:22:24,823
Sal: Alright.
605
00:22:24,825 --> 00:22:25,958
What am I supposed
to do with this?
606
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:27,159
You're supposed
to drink that,
607
00:22:27,161 --> 00:22:28,627
And when you finish drinking it,
we're done.
608
00:22:28,629 --> 00:22:31,297
Murr: That's it, buddy.
Simple punishment.
609
00:22:31,299 --> 00:22:32,499
Sal: It's so cute.
610
00:22:32,501 --> 00:22:34,166
You know that this is everything
with everything.
611
00:22:34,168 --> 00:22:37,036
So in this concoction right now,
we have toothpaste,
612
00:22:37,038 --> 00:22:39,638
Sardine,
dried fish flakes,
613
00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:44,443
Escargot, grasshoppers,
grass, and cow tongue.
614
00:22:44,445 --> 00:22:47,446
The best. This is
the culmination of everything.
615
00:22:47,448 --> 00:22:49,716
Yeah.
It could be
the culmination of your career.
616
00:22:49,718 --> 00:22:52,651
[ laughter ]
617
00:22:52,653 --> 00:22:53,887
Try it. You'll like it.
618
00:22:55,857 --> 00:22:57,123
Drum roll, please.
619
00:22:57,125 --> 00:22:58,291
[ drum roll ]
620
00:23:00,862 --> 00:23:02,194
[ laughs ]
621
00:23:02,196 --> 00:23:03,730
Down the hatch,
as they say.
622
00:23:03,732 --> 00:23:05,998
Up the lid.
623
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:08,401
[ gags ]
624
00:23:08,403 --> 00:23:10,403
It's a success.
625
00:23:10,405 --> 00:23:12,671
[ laughter ]
626
00:23:12,673 --> 00:23:14,473
He didn't even
drink it yet.
627
00:23:14,475 --> 00:23:16,875
The smell is outrageous.
You threw up?
Legit?
628
00:23:16,877 --> 00:23:20,413
The smell is out--
[ gags ]
629
00:23:20,415 --> 00:23:23,882
No, thanks.
I just brushed my teeth.
630
00:23:23,884 --> 00:23:26,753
Murr: Alright, q.
Here we go, buddy.
631
00:23:26,755 --> 00:23:28,154
Sal: Here we go.
632
00:23:28,156 --> 00:23:31,958
Alright, buddy.
Alright, alright.
633
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:33,092
Watch out.
Get out of --
634
00:23:33,094 --> 00:23:35,027
Oh!
[ laughs ]
635
00:23:35,029 --> 00:23:37,630
[ vomits ]
636
00:23:40,501 --> 00:23:42,368
It was in my mouth.
It was in my mouth.
637
00:23:42,370 --> 00:23:44,036
[ gags ]
q: What do I
got to do here?
638
00:23:44,038 --> 00:23:45,905
Don't stand near me
and dry heave.
639
00:23:45,907 --> 00:23:47,373
I didn't know
I was going to do it.
640
00:23:47,375 --> 00:23:48,707
It comes out
involuntarily.
641
00:23:48,709 --> 00:23:50,243
You're dry heaving
over my right shoulder.
642
00:23:50,245 --> 00:23:53,312
[ gags ]
oh.
643
00:23:53,314 --> 00:23:55,582
I would get out
of spraying distance.
644
00:23:55,584 --> 00:23:57,516
[ vomits ]
645
00:23:57,518 --> 00:24:01,187
You know, it's great to be
doing highbrow comedy again.
646
00:24:01,189 --> 00:24:02,689
[ laughter ]