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Didn't that kid from St. Mary's drown here this summer?
Yeah, but they drained the pool and shit.
Yeah, still, it's disturbing.
Dude, you're disturbing.
If you could, would you go down on yourself?
I heard Marilyn Manson can do that.
Wouldn't that be gay?
Well, is masturbating gay? It's like a handjob.
I'd totally do it.
People would probably stop reproducing.
I mean, if you can suck your own cocker, who needs chicks?
The end of the world would be, like, three dudes in an open field just--
just blowing themselves.
What the...
After the murders, I had lost every ounce of my humor.
All I could think about was that night.
The look on Chrissy's face.
She haunted me...like a bad dream.
One doesn't easily forget the smell of their high school:
a mixture of industrial-strength cleaning products,
chalk, deodorant, wet paint, and hormones.
Hey.
First day, huh?
You excited?
Look at the joy bubbling on your faces, huh?
Whoo!
Okay, I've got some syllabi for you.
Please take one, and pass it down.
That would be grand.
You'll notice on the front page there's an important piece of protocol
that I'm gonna be very strict about.
It's notes, okay?
You must all take notes on your stories.
Your memory is only so reliable.
Journalists report facts, not recollections.
Now, who's got some ideas for the first issue?
Yeah, Billingsly?
I'd like to write about the healthy food options in the cafeteria.
Okay, next?
Chambers, what do you got for me?
I-I'd like to write about the murders.
Uh, wh-what about 'em, exactly?
You know, just that night
and, um, what I saw.
My experience.
That's a pretty touchy subject, man--
Bouque, please.
I know it's touchy, all right?
But a student died, all right?
And I'm--I'm a journalist,
and you always tell us to search for the truth,
and as a--as a newspaper, we need to talk about this somehow.
And a teacher died too.
Okay, just--I don't know.
Just keep it concise, classy.
Just try not to win a Peabody out of it, okay?
All right, um, who's got--yeah?
I'd like to write about the choir-chemistry conflict.
- Hey. - Sounds rough.
I can't wait to read that when you're finished, Charlie.
Thanks, Berlice.
Uh, maybe you can copy-edit for me?
Yeah.
And who is that affecting?
Hey.
What are you doing here?
Just, uh, getting some fresh air.
How's the Schlitz?
Warm.
Flat.
Pretty good.
Think I could get a sip?
Be my guest.
- Thank you. - I found it in my dad's shed.
- I figured why not, right? - Yeah.
I didn't know you drank.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Uh, socially.
Whatever.
You know, I, uh...
I didn't get to tell you at the funeral,
but uh...
I'm really sorry about your sister.
You know, what happened to her was, uh...
You know, it's funny.
I didn't even like my sister when she was alive.
Hey, you remember that time
when we stayed up all night drinking pop
and watching "Saturday Night Live"?
I mean, those times were the best.
No, not really.
But that sounds like fun.
Um, I...
I gotta go, Charlie.
I'll see you around?
Yeah.
Oh, your--your drink.
Hello?
Sorry, wrong number.
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