1 00:00:04,241 --> 00:00:07,517 Destinee: EVERY DAY, I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING. 2 00:00:07,517 --> 00:00:10,689 AND EVERY DAY, I'M BECOMING MORE AND MORE HELPLESS. 3 00:00:10,689 --> 00:00:17,137 ♪♪ 4 00:00:17,137 --> 00:00:19,793 Woman #1: HE CAN'T STOP. HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW. 5 00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:22,758 Woman #2: IT'S TERRIFYING TO THINK THAT AT ANY MOMENT, 6 00:00:22,758 --> 00:00:24,551 YOUR HEART COULD EXPLODE. 7 00:00:24,551 --> 00:00:29,827 ♪♪ 8 00:00:29,827 --> 00:00:35,137 ♪♪ 9 00:00:35,137 --> 00:00:37,689 Woman: I DON'T WANT TO DIE. 10 00:00:37,689 --> 00:00:39,965 I HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN TO LIVE YET. 11 00:00:39,965 --> 00:00:44,275 ♪♪ 12 00:00:44,275 --> 00:00:46,103 WHY ARE YOU JUMPING ON MY CASE? 13 00:00:46,103 --> 00:00:49,689 YOU'RE OVEREATING, AND YOU'RE YELLING LIKE IT IS OUR FAULT. 14 00:00:49,689 --> 00:00:51,275 Woman: I KNOW THAT I'M DYING. 15 00:00:51,275 --> 00:00:53,413 I KNOW THAT I'M NOT GONNA MAKE IT. 16 00:00:53,413 --> 00:00:57,448 ♪♪ 17 00:00:57,448 --> 00:00:59,413 I'M GONNA GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE. 18 00:00:59,413 --> 00:01:01,448 YOU EITHER WANT TO DO THIS OR YOU DON'T. 19 00:01:01,448 --> 00:01:04,724 OH, LORD. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. 20 00:01:04,724 --> 00:01:14,551 ♪♪ 21 00:01:14,551 --> 00:01:17,551 --Captions by VITAC-- www.vitac.com 22 00:01:17,551 --> 00:01:20,517 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS 23 00:01:20,517 --> 00:01:27,517 ♪♪ 24 00:01:27,517 --> 00:01:34,586 ♪♪ 25 00:01:34,586 --> 00:01:38,482 Destinee: EVERY SINGLE DAY OF MY LIFE IS HARD 26 00:01:38,482 --> 00:01:43,206 BECAUSE EVERY DAY, I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING. 27 00:01:43,206 --> 00:01:48,172 AND EVERY DAY, I'M BECOMING MORE AND MORE HELPLESS. 28 00:01:48,172 --> 00:01:49,655 WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING, 29 00:01:49,655 --> 00:01:52,896 I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN AND I CAN'T MOVE RIGHT. 30 00:01:52,896 --> 00:01:55,931 I FEEL STIFF. 31 00:01:55,931 --> 00:01:57,413 AND IT'S GETTING WORSE 32 00:01:57,413 --> 00:01:59,896 TO WHERE I CAN HANDLE LESS AND LESS EACH DAY, 33 00:01:59,896 --> 00:02:02,034 AND I'M STRUGGLING TO WALK NOW. 34 00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:04,655 ♪♪ 35 00:02:04,655 --> 00:02:06,448 MY MOBILITY'S REALLY LIMITED. 36 00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:09,517 I CAN ONLY TAKE MAYBE FIVE STEPS, 37 00:02:09,517 --> 00:02:12,793 AND I'M OUT OF BREATH. 38 00:02:12,793 --> 00:02:16,310 SO BEING AS BIG AS I AM IS MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE 39 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:19,586 TO HAVE A NORMAL LIFE. 40 00:02:19,586 --> 00:02:23,206 EVEN THE SIMPLEST THINGS AREN'T POSSIBLE FOR ME NOW. 41 00:02:23,206 --> 00:02:25,551 TRYING TO GET UP AND USE THE RESTROOM 42 00:02:25,551 --> 00:02:29,172 IS SOMETIMES THE HARDEST THINGS TO DO. 43 00:02:29,172 --> 00:02:31,482 AND I'M REALLY GETTING REALLY CLOSE 44 00:02:31,482 --> 00:02:35,862 TO NOT BEING ABLE TO FIT IN MY SHOWER, AND THAT SCARES ME. 45 00:02:35,862 --> 00:02:40,586 ♪♪ 46 00:02:40,586 --> 00:02:43,551 BECAUSE I COULD GET STUCK, AND IT COULD BE A WHILE 47 00:02:43,551 --> 00:02:47,620 BEFORE SOMEONE FOUND ME, SINCE I LIVE ALONE. 48 00:02:47,620 --> 00:02:51,551 SO I'VE LET MY WEIGHT GET TO A REALLY DANGEROUS PLACE. 49 00:02:51,551 --> 00:02:53,724 SO I'VE STARTED ASKING MY SISTER, NUNA, 50 00:02:53,724 --> 00:02:57,172 TO COME OVER IN THE MORNING TO GIVE ME PEACE OF MIND, 51 00:02:57,172 --> 00:03:01,482 KNOWING I HAVE HELP IF SOMETHING DOES HAPPEN. 52 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:05,413 NUNA! CAN YOU BRING ME A TOWEL, PLEASE? 53 00:03:05,413 --> 00:03:07,620 ♪♪ 54 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:09,689 PUT IT ON YOUR BED, OR BRING IT TO YOU? 55 00:03:13,448 --> 00:03:17,793 ♪♪ 56 00:03:17,793 --> 00:03:19,931 Nuna: MY SISTER'S 27 YEARS OLD. 57 00:03:19,931 --> 00:03:22,965 SHE HAS HER OWN PLACE, BUT I DON'T FEEL 58 00:03:22,965 --> 00:03:26,413 SHE'S COMPLETELY STABLE TO STAY BY HERSELF. 59 00:03:26,413 --> 00:03:29,344 SO I COME EVERY DAY TO HELP HER OUT 60 00:03:29,344 --> 00:03:31,137 BECAUSE I REALLY FEEL LIKE SHE NEEDS HELP 61 00:03:31,137 --> 00:03:33,344 WITH EVERYTHING, EVEN WALKING. 62 00:03:35,448 --> 00:03:37,517 NO, NOT YET. 63 00:03:41,068 --> 00:03:42,931 OKAY. 64 00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:45,965 ♪♪ 65 00:03:45,965 --> 00:03:47,965 Nuna: I COOK BREAKFAST FOR DESTINEE. 66 00:03:47,965 --> 00:03:50,241 WHATEVER SHE WANTS, I'LL COOK. 67 00:03:50,241 --> 00:03:53,793 EVEN THOUGH I HATE COOKING EXACTLY WHAT ALL SHE WANTS, 68 00:03:53,793 --> 00:03:56,620 'CAUSE I FEEL LIKE SHE'S GONNA KILL HERSELF WITH FOOD, 69 00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:59,413 BECAUSE THREE TO FOUR PEOPLE CAN FEED OFF HER PLATE. 70 00:03:59,413 --> 00:04:01,034 AND I TELL HER THAT ALL THE TIME, 71 00:04:01,034 --> 00:04:03,413 BUT SHE JUST DOESN'T LISTEN. 72 00:04:03,413 --> 00:04:05,241 ♪♪ 73 00:04:05,241 --> 00:04:07,482 Destinee: IT'S EXTREMELY EMBARRASSING 74 00:04:07,482 --> 00:04:09,965 TO HAVE TO ASK NUNA TO DO THINGS FOR ME, 75 00:04:09,965 --> 00:04:11,965 BECAUSE I CAN ONLY STAND A COUPLE OF MINUTES 76 00:04:11,965 --> 00:04:15,344 BEFORE THE PAIN GETS UNBEARABLE. 77 00:04:15,344 --> 00:04:17,862 AND IF I FELL, I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO GET UP. 78 00:04:17,862 --> 00:04:21,931 AND SOMETHING AS SIMPLE AS THAT COULD END UP KILLING ME. 79 00:04:21,931 --> 00:04:26,931 IT'S LIKE HAVING SOMEONE ON SOME SORT OF DEATH WATCH FOR YOU. 80 00:04:26,931 --> 00:04:31,620 AND I HATE THAT I HAVE TO BURDEN HER WITH THIS RESPONSIBILITY. 81 00:04:31,620 --> 00:04:33,724 BUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE, 82 00:04:33,724 --> 00:04:38,000 I'M LOSING MY ABILITY TO CARE FOR MYSELF. 83 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:43,517 AND THE BIGGER I GET, THE CLOSER I GET TO BECOMING BEDBOUND 84 00:04:43,517 --> 00:04:45,827 AND HAVING TO BE COMPLETELY DEPENDENT 85 00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:47,965 ON SOMEONE ELSE FOR EVERYTHING. 86 00:04:47,965 --> 00:04:50,103 ♪♪ 87 00:04:50,103 --> 00:04:52,000 BECAUSE I'M TRAPPED IN THIS ROOM, 88 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,482 UNABLE TO GO ANYWHERE ANYMORE... 89 00:04:54,482 --> 00:04:57,344 ♪♪ 90 00:04:57,344 --> 00:05:00,000 ...ALL BECAUSE I WON'T GIVE UP FOOD. 91 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:07,206 ♪♪ 92 00:05:07,206 --> 00:05:10,275 ONE, TWO, THREE. 93 00:05:10,275 --> 00:05:15,034 ♪♪ 94 00:05:15,034 --> 00:05:17,137 SO, YOU WANT ME TO GO FIX YOU A PLATE AND BRING IT IN HERE? 95 00:05:17,137 --> 00:05:18,482 -YEAH, PLEASE. -ALL RIGHT. 96 00:05:18,482 --> 00:05:20,655 -THANK YOU. -YOU'RE WELCOME. 97 00:05:20,655 --> 00:05:22,724 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 98 00:05:25,034 --> 00:05:30,068 ♪♪ 99 00:05:30,068 --> 00:05:33,310 FOOD IS THE ONLY HAPPINESS I HAVE IN MY LIFE. 100 00:05:33,310 --> 00:05:36,517 IT'S MY ESCAPE. 101 00:05:36,517 --> 00:05:39,310 AND WHEN I HAVE SOMETHING THAT TASTES GOOD IN MY MOUTH, 102 00:05:39,310 --> 00:05:42,241 ALL I CARE ABOUT IS THAT I FEEL GOOD. 103 00:05:42,241 --> 00:05:47,068 AND MY LIFE DOESN'T SEEM THAT BAD IN THAT MOMENT. 104 00:05:47,068 --> 00:05:50,137 SO ALL I WANT TO DO IS EAT ALL DAY AND EVERY DAY 105 00:05:50,137 --> 00:05:51,793 AND NEVER STOP, 106 00:05:51,793 --> 00:05:54,275 BECAUSE I NEVER WANT THAT FEELING OF COMFORT 107 00:05:54,275 --> 00:05:57,724 AND SAFETY AND LOVE AND HAPPINESS TO GO AWAY. 108 00:05:57,724 --> 00:06:00,551 ♪♪ 109 00:06:00,551 --> 00:06:02,655 AND AT THIS POINT, I'M NOT EVEN SURE 110 00:06:02,655 --> 00:06:06,275 I CAN STOP ALL OF THIS FROM GETTING EVEN WORSE. 111 00:06:06,275 --> 00:06:08,482 I NEVER THOUGHT THAT I WOULD ACTUALLY GET TO BE 112 00:06:08,482 --> 00:06:10,586 OVER 600 POUNDS. 113 00:06:10,586 --> 00:06:13,655 YOU NEVER MAKE THE DECISION TO END UP LIKE THIS. 114 00:06:13,655 --> 00:06:15,655 YOU MAKE OTHER DECISIONS THAT LEAD YOU HERE 115 00:06:15,655 --> 00:06:17,551 WITHOUT EVER REALLY REALIZING 116 00:06:17,551 --> 00:06:20,241 THAT THIS WAS THE PATH THAT YOU WERE ON. 117 00:06:20,241 --> 00:06:24,344 AND YOU'D GIVE ANYTHING TO GO BACK AND CHANGE IT, 118 00:06:24,344 --> 00:06:25,655 BUT YOU CAN'T. 119 00:06:25,655 --> 00:06:27,034 THE PAST IS THE PAST, 120 00:06:27,034 --> 00:06:29,275 AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT. 121 00:06:29,275 --> 00:06:35,241 ♪♪ 122 00:06:35,241 --> 00:06:39,068 I WAS BORN AS A BOY, AND MY MOM NAMED ME MATTHEW. 123 00:06:39,068 --> 00:06:43,206 AND RIGHT FROM THE START, MY LIFE HAS BEEN CHAOS 124 00:06:43,206 --> 00:06:46,000 BECAUSE MY MOM WAS ONLY 16 WHEN SHE HAD ME, 125 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:48,655 AND SHE WASN'T READY. 126 00:06:48,655 --> 00:06:51,896 AND SHE WAS IN A BIRACIAL RELATIONSHIP WITH MY FATHER. 127 00:06:51,896 --> 00:06:54,448 MY MOM'S FAMILY WAS VERY RACIST. 128 00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:55,793 BECAUSE OF THAT, NONE OF HER FAMILY 129 00:06:55,793 --> 00:06:57,586 WAS ABLE TO GIVE HER SUPPORT. 130 00:06:57,586 --> 00:06:59,379 THEY BASICALLY DISOWNED HER. 131 00:06:59,379 --> 00:07:01,724 ♪♪ 132 00:07:01,724 --> 00:07:04,586 OVER THE NEXT TWO YEARS AFTER I WAS BORN, 133 00:07:04,586 --> 00:07:06,931 MY MOM HAD MY TWO BROTHERS. 134 00:07:06,931 --> 00:07:10,862 BUT AFTER THAT, MY FATHER LEFT. 135 00:07:10,862 --> 00:07:14,620 SO I HAD A TEENAGE MOM WHO WAS COMPLETELY ON HER OWN, 136 00:07:14,620 --> 00:07:16,896 TRYING TO RAISE THREE KIDS BY HERSELF. 137 00:07:16,896 --> 00:07:20,689 AND IT ENDED UP LEADING HER INTO SOME BAD THINGS. 138 00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:24,689 I WAS REALLY ON MY OWN, SO I TRIED FINDING JOBS. 139 00:07:24,689 --> 00:07:27,482 BUT WITH THREE KIDS, I COULDN'T HAVE A JOB 140 00:07:27,482 --> 00:07:29,482 BECAUSE I COULDN'T AFFORD A BABYSITTER. 141 00:07:29,482 --> 00:07:32,551 SO EVENTUALLY, THINGS JUST GOT REAL ROUGH FOR ME. 142 00:07:32,551 --> 00:07:35,965 ♪♪ 143 00:07:35,965 --> 00:07:38,310 Destinee: SO EVENTUALLY, THAT LIFESTYLE CAUGHT UP WITH HER, 144 00:07:38,310 --> 00:07:40,551 AND SOCIAL SERVICES GOT INVOLVED. 145 00:07:40,551 --> 00:07:42,689 AND ALL THREE OF US ENDED UP IN FOSTER CARE 146 00:07:42,689 --> 00:07:44,275 BY THE TIME I WAS 4, 147 00:07:44,275 --> 00:07:46,724 AND MY MOM WAS FORCED TO GIVE UP CUSTODY OF US. 148 00:07:46,724 --> 00:07:48,793 BUT SHE STRUCK A DEAL THAT ALLOWED HER 149 00:07:48,793 --> 00:07:52,103 TO STILL BE A PART OF OUR LIVES AND STAY IN TOUCH. 150 00:07:52,103 --> 00:07:53,827 ♪♪ 151 00:07:53,827 --> 00:07:56,482 BUT IT WAS REALLY HARD ON ALL OF US. 152 00:07:56,482 --> 00:07:59,413 IT HURT ME A LOT TO NOT BE WITH HER AT ALL TIMES. 153 00:07:59,413 --> 00:08:02,413 FROM BIRTH, JUST NOT -- THE FAMILY NOT LIKING YOU, 154 00:08:02,413 --> 00:08:04,689 AND THEN HAVING TO BE PUT IN FOSTER CARE, 155 00:08:04,689 --> 00:08:07,793 AND THEN HAVING A LOT OF ISSUES GOING ON GROWING UP -- 156 00:08:07,793 --> 00:08:10,137 YOU KNOW, I JUST ALWAYS FELT REJECTED. 157 00:08:10,137 --> 00:08:13,344 I'VE NEVER FELT LIKE I BELONGED ANYWHERE. 158 00:08:13,344 --> 00:08:16,551 SO IT WAS REALLY HARD FOR ME AND FOR MY BROTHERS. 159 00:08:16,551 --> 00:08:20,896 AND IT JUST GOT HARDER, BECAUSE OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF YEARS, 160 00:08:20,896 --> 00:08:23,034 OUR FOSTER MOM, MAMA ROSE, 161 00:08:23,034 --> 00:08:27,931 ENDED UP HAVING SEVEN OTHER FOSTER KIDS IN THE HOUSE. 162 00:08:27,931 --> 00:08:30,000 AND WITH THAT MANY PEOPLE UNDER ONE ROOF, 163 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:32,344 THERE HAD TO BE A LOT OF FOOD. 164 00:08:32,344 --> 00:08:34,655 AND MY FAVORITE TIMES WERE WHEN WE WERE EATING, 165 00:08:34,655 --> 00:08:37,379 BECAUSE ALL THE PAIN OF BEING APART FROM MY MOM 166 00:08:37,379 --> 00:08:39,896 AND MISSING HER WOULD ALL FADE AWAY 167 00:08:39,896 --> 00:08:43,482 AS LONG AS I WAS EATING SOMETHING GOOD. 168 00:08:43,482 --> 00:08:46,379 SO FOOD STARTED TO BECOME MY ESCAPE FROM MY LIFE, 169 00:08:46,379 --> 00:08:48,068 AND THAT WAS WHEN I WAS 7. 170 00:08:48,068 --> 00:08:51,172 AND I DOUBLED MY SIZE OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF YEARS 171 00:08:51,172 --> 00:08:54,931 AND WAS OVER 150 POUNDS BY THE TIME I WAS 9. 172 00:08:54,931 --> 00:08:56,827 UP TO THAT POINT IN OUR LIVES, 173 00:08:56,827 --> 00:08:59,206 MY MOM STAYED IN TOUCH WITH US BY CALLING. 174 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:01,724 SOMETIMES WHEN WE HAD BIRTHDAYS, SHE WOULD BRING US CAKES. 175 00:09:01,724 --> 00:09:04,793 SHE WOULD BRING US CLOTHES SOMETIMES, SHOES. 176 00:09:04,793 --> 00:09:07,172 I WOULD SAY SHE CAME AROUND EVERY COUPLE MONTHS. 177 00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:10,931 BUT A COUPLE YEARS AFTER I WAS PUT IN FOSTER CARE, MY MAMA -- 178 00:09:10,931 --> 00:09:14,206 SHE HAD TO GO TO JAIL FOR A COUPLE YEARS. 179 00:09:14,206 --> 00:09:19,137 EVENTUALLY, I STARTED GETTING IN TROUBLE FROM SHOPLIFTING. 180 00:09:19,137 --> 00:09:22,448 I HAD TO DO TIME. I DID THREE YEARS. 181 00:09:22,448 --> 00:09:24,137 ♪♪ 182 00:09:24,137 --> 00:09:25,862 Destinee: SO, DURING THAT TIME, 183 00:09:25,862 --> 00:09:28,034 EVERYTHING FELT SO MUCH LONELIER. 184 00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:31,689 AND ASIDE FROM MY BROTHERS, I FELT LIKE I HAD NO ONE 185 00:09:31,689 --> 00:09:34,758 SO I NEEDED THE ESCAPE OF FOOD EVEN MORE. 186 00:09:34,758 --> 00:09:36,862 ♪♪ 187 00:09:36,862 --> 00:09:39,379 SO, I MADE IT UP TO AROUND 220 POUNDS 188 00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:40,862 BY THE TIME I WAS 12, 189 00:09:40,862 --> 00:09:43,206 AND I WAS STILL GETTING BIGGER AND BIGGER 190 00:09:43,206 --> 00:09:47,103 BECAUSE I WOULD EAT MORE AND MORE THE HARDER THINGS GOT. 191 00:09:47,103 --> 00:09:49,413 ♪♪ 192 00:09:49,413 --> 00:09:51,689 MY FOSTER MOM, MAMA ROSE, DIED. 193 00:09:51,689 --> 00:09:54,655 AND ALL OF HER OTHER FOSTER KIDS WERE SENT TO OTHER HOMES, 194 00:09:54,655 --> 00:09:56,551 SO I WAS SPLIT UP FROM MY BROTHERS, 195 00:09:56,551 --> 00:09:58,551 AND I LOST THEM DURING THAT TIME. 196 00:09:58,551 --> 00:10:01,827 WITH MY MOM GONE, THEY WERE MY ONLY FAMILY. 197 00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:04,137 ♪♪ 198 00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:06,413 SO I WAS MORE ALONE THAN EVER, 199 00:10:06,413 --> 00:10:09,103 AND I FELT LIKE I HAD ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. 200 00:10:09,103 --> 00:10:11,241 SO RIGHT BEFORE MY MOM GOT OUT OF PRISON, 201 00:10:11,241 --> 00:10:12,896 SHE TOLD ME WHO MY DAD WAS, 202 00:10:12,896 --> 00:10:14,896 AND I DECIDED I WANTED TO MEET HIM. 203 00:10:14,896 --> 00:10:17,000 AND WHEN I DID, HE REJECTED ME THAT DAY. 204 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,379 HE WAS ON THE PHONE WITH MY MAMA SAYING, "THIS ISN'T MY SON. 205 00:10:20,379 --> 00:10:22,172 MY SON WOULD WANT TO PLAY SPORTS. 206 00:10:22,172 --> 00:10:24,689 HE DOESN'T LOOK ANYTHING LIKE ME, SO THIS ISN'T MY SON." 207 00:10:24,689 --> 00:10:26,379 AND LITERALLY LIKE, A WEEK LATER, 208 00:10:26,379 --> 00:10:29,413 THEY CALLED ME AND TOLD ME HE DIED. 209 00:10:29,413 --> 00:10:31,379 I WAS DEVASTATED. 210 00:10:31,379 --> 00:10:33,206 YOU KNOW, WHEN HE PASSED AWAY, IT WAS JUST LIKE, 211 00:10:33,206 --> 00:10:35,517 "OKAY, I'M LOSING EVERYBODY ELSE." 212 00:10:35,517 --> 00:10:39,931 JUST -- I DON'T HAVE NOBODY. DIDN'T HAVE NOBODY. 213 00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:42,827 EVERYTHING JUST KEPT FALLING APART. 214 00:10:42,827 --> 00:10:46,068 THE ONLY THING I COULD TRUST TO BE THERE FOR ME WAS FOOD, 215 00:10:46,068 --> 00:10:48,931 SO I JUST KEPT EATING AND GAINING EVEN FASTER. 216 00:10:48,931 --> 00:10:50,655 AND BY THE TIME I WAS 15, 217 00:10:50,655 --> 00:10:54,413 I HAD MADE IT TO BEING OVER 350 POUNDS. 218 00:10:54,413 --> 00:10:57,068 ♪♪ 219 00:10:57,068 --> 00:10:59,000 AND BEING THAT SIZE AS A TEENAGER 220 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,137 DIDN'T REALLY HELP MY SOCIAL LIFE. 221 00:11:01,137 --> 00:11:03,068 AND TO MAKE IT ALL EVEN HARDER, 222 00:11:03,068 --> 00:11:06,068 I REALIZED AROUND THIS TIME THAT I WAS GAY. 223 00:11:06,068 --> 00:11:10,551 SO THIS WAS PROBABLY THE HARDEST TIME IN MY LIFE. 224 00:11:10,551 --> 00:11:12,275 MY MOM HAD BEEN RELEASED FROM PRISON 225 00:11:12,275 --> 00:11:15,206 BEFORE I ENTERED HIGH SCHOOL, BUT SHE HAD MET SOMEONE 226 00:11:15,206 --> 00:11:18,137 AND GOTTEN REMARRIED AND STARTED A NEW FAMILY. 227 00:11:18,137 --> 00:11:20,103 SO SHE DIDN'T HAVE MUCH TIME FOR ME 228 00:11:20,103 --> 00:11:21,517 AND MY BROTHERS AT THIS POINT, 229 00:11:21,517 --> 00:11:23,931 BECAUSE SHE HAD TWO YOUNG CHILDREN TO CARE FOR -- 230 00:11:23,931 --> 00:11:27,689 MY HALF-BROTHER WAYNE, AND HALF-SISTER, NUNA. 231 00:11:27,689 --> 00:11:31,689 SO IT STILL FELT VERY MUCH LIKE ME VERSUS THE WORLD 232 00:11:31,689 --> 00:11:34,206 AND THAT I WAS STILL COMPLETELY ON MY OWN, 233 00:11:34,206 --> 00:11:39,275 BECAUSE I PRETTY MUCH WAS UP UNTIL I WAS 18. 234 00:11:39,275 --> 00:11:41,551 BECAUSE WHEN I WAS DONE WITH THE FOSTER-CARE SYSTEM, 235 00:11:41,551 --> 00:11:43,206 MY MOM LET ME MOVE IN WITH HER 236 00:11:43,206 --> 00:11:45,793 UNTIL I COULD GET A JOB AND PROVIDE FOR MYSELF. 237 00:11:45,793 --> 00:11:47,758 AND FOR A LITTLE BIT, I STARTED TO FEEL LIKE 238 00:11:47,758 --> 00:11:49,827 I ACTUALLY HAD A FAMILY. 239 00:11:49,827 --> 00:11:51,758 ♪♪ 240 00:11:51,758 --> 00:11:53,793 BUT THAT ALL FELL APART FOR A BIT, 241 00:11:53,793 --> 00:11:55,482 BECAUSE I DECIDED TO COME OUT, 242 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,689 AND MY MOM DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE IT. 243 00:11:57,689 --> 00:12:00,241 BUT THANKFULLY, SHE EVENTUALLY CAME AROUND. 244 00:12:00,241 --> 00:12:02,620 BUT THAT WASN'T THE CASE WITH THE REST OF MY FAMILY 245 00:12:02,620 --> 00:12:03,965 WHEN I TOLD THEM. 246 00:12:03,965 --> 00:12:06,586 I CALLED EVERYBODY, AND I EXPLAINED TO THEM, 247 00:12:06,586 --> 00:12:09,862 "I'M NOT HIDING NO MORE. I WANT TO BE WHO I WANT TO BE. 248 00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:11,551 I'M GAY, AND I JUST, YOU KNOW, 249 00:12:11,551 --> 00:12:14,793 HOPE THAT I CAN HAVE Y'ALL APPROVAL." 250 00:12:14,793 --> 00:12:16,689 BUT I WAS LIVING IN A SMALL TOWN, 251 00:12:16,689 --> 00:12:19,724 AND BEING GAY WASN'T SOMETHING THAT WAS ACCEPTED. 252 00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:22,206 SO I FEEL LIKE IT ALMOST COMPLETELY ISOLATED ME 253 00:12:22,206 --> 00:12:24,206 FROM EVERYONE IN MY LIFE. 254 00:12:24,206 --> 00:12:26,206 ♪♪ 255 00:12:26,206 --> 00:12:28,965 PEOPLE WHO I THOUGHT CARED ABOUT ME TALKED ABOUT ME 256 00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:32,482 AND SHAMED ME FOR WHAT I AM, AND IT HURT ME A LOT. 257 00:12:32,482 --> 00:12:34,551 SO I GOT REALLY DEPRESSED. 258 00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:37,931 AND I HAVE NOT YET BEEN HAPPY SINCE THAT DAY. 259 00:12:37,931 --> 00:12:40,827 I FEEL LIKE MAYBE IF I WOULD'VE KEPT IT TO MYSELF, 260 00:12:40,827 --> 00:12:43,448 YOU KNOW, MAYBE I WOULD'VE LIVED BETTER. 261 00:12:43,448 --> 00:12:45,931 THE ONLY PEOPLE I TRULY FEEL ACCEPTED ME 262 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:48,137 WERE MY MOM AND HALF-BROTHER ANTHONY, 263 00:12:48,137 --> 00:12:50,137 AND HALF-SISTER, NUNA. 264 00:12:50,137 --> 00:12:53,517 AND NOT ONLY WAS I GAY, BUT OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF YEARS, 265 00:12:53,517 --> 00:12:55,965 I STARTED TO LIVE LIFE AS A WOMAN. 266 00:12:55,965 --> 00:12:58,965 I DECIDED, "HEY, I LOOK LIKE A WOMAN. 267 00:12:58,965 --> 00:13:01,586 MAYBE I SHOULD TRY ON WIGS." 268 00:13:01,586 --> 00:13:04,862 AND SO ONE DAY I TRIED ON CERTAIN WIGS AND MAKEUP, 269 00:13:04,862 --> 00:13:06,379 AND I WAS LIKE, "OH, I'M SO BEAUTIFUL." 270 00:13:06,379 --> 00:13:08,517 I SAID, I SHOULD -- I SAID, "I THINK I SHOULD BE A WOMAN." 271 00:13:08,517 --> 00:13:11,379 I SAID, "I LOOK SO GOOD AS A WOMAN." 272 00:13:11,379 --> 00:13:14,724 AND WHEN I WAS 22, I DECIDED TO START LIVING MY LIFE 273 00:13:14,724 --> 00:13:16,103 AS A FULL WOMAN, 274 00:13:16,103 --> 00:13:18,448 AND I CHANGED MY NAME TO DESTINEE. 275 00:13:18,448 --> 00:13:22,310 AND I'VE BEEN A WOMAN EVER SINCE. 276 00:13:22,310 --> 00:13:25,172 AND THROUGH THAT TIME, I NEVER FELT JUDGED BY MY MOM 277 00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:27,000 OR ANTHONY AND NUNA. 278 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,551 AND IT WAS NICE TO HAVE SOME FAMILY SUPPORT, 279 00:13:29,551 --> 00:13:31,931 BUT THERE WAS STILL A LOT OF PAIN AND REJECTION 280 00:13:31,931 --> 00:13:33,275 IN MY LIFE THAT WAS HARD. 281 00:13:33,275 --> 00:13:35,241 AND I WAS, OF COURSE, STILL USING FOOD 282 00:13:35,241 --> 00:13:38,379 TO HELP DEAL WITH ALL OF THAT. 283 00:13:38,379 --> 00:13:40,724 SO I HAD STILL BEEN EATING A LOT, 284 00:13:40,724 --> 00:13:44,344 AND I HAD MADE IT INTO OVER 450 POUNDS. 285 00:13:44,344 --> 00:13:46,551 AND AS A LARGE, GAY, TRANSGENDER PERSON, 286 00:13:46,551 --> 00:13:50,724 I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE I FIT IN ANYWHERE. 287 00:13:50,724 --> 00:13:53,034 ME AND ANTHONY HAD GOTTEN CLOSE AS BROTHERS 288 00:13:53,034 --> 00:13:54,827 WHILE I LIVED WITH MY MOM, 289 00:13:54,827 --> 00:13:59,103 AND SO WE HAD MOVED OUT ON OUR OWN TOGETHER. 290 00:13:59,103 --> 00:14:01,586 SO I NEEDED TO PAY MY FAIR SHARE OF THE RENT 291 00:14:01,586 --> 00:14:04,034 AND GOT DIFFERENT JOBS AT A FEW PLACES. 292 00:14:04,034 --> 00:14:06,379 BUT THEY WOULDN'T LET ME WORK UNDER MY NEW NAME 293 00:14:06,379 --> 00:14:09,172 OR USE THE WOMEN'S RESTROOM, SO I STILL WASN'T ABLE 294 00:14:09,172 --> 00:14:12,862 TO LIVE THE TRUE PERSON THAT I WANTED TO BE. 295 00:14:12,862 --> 00:14:16,586 AND FOOD WAS ALWAYS MY ESCAPE FROM A LIFE I FELT TRAPPED IN. 296 00:14:16,586 --> 00:14:19,931 BUT WHEN I WAS 25, THINGS GOT WORSE. 297 00:14:19,931 --> 00:14:22,655 I WAS OVER 500 POUNDS AT THAT TIME. 298 00:14:22,655 --> 00:14:26,310 BUT DURING THAT TIME, MY BROTHER ANTHONY HAD TO GET SURGERY. 299 00:14:26,310 --> 00:14:28,551 IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A MINOR PROCEDURE. 300 00:14:28,551 --> 00:14:30,034 BUT WHEN HE CAME HOME, 301 00:14:30,034 --> 00:14:32,931 HE DEVELOPED A BLOOD CLOT FROM IT. 302 00:14:32,931 --> 00:14:36,310 AND IT CAUSED AN ANEURYSM THAT KILLED HIM. 303 00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:39,827 HE ENDED UP DYING IN MY ARMS AT HOME. 304 00:14:39,827 --> 00:14:42,965 WHEN THEY COULDN'T SAVE HIM, I JUST TRIED TO KILL MYSELF 305 00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:45,689 BECAUSE I JUST WANTED TO GO JOIN HIM. 306 00:14:45,689 --> 00:14:47,241 ♪♪ 307 00:14:47,241 --> 00:14:50,758 BUT I GOT SO DEPRESSED AFTER THAT THAT I COULDN'T HANDLE IT. 308 00:14:50,758 --> 00:14:53,551 FOOD COULDN'T EVEN TAKE THAT PAIN AWAY THEN. 309 00:14:53,551 --> 00:14:55,551 ♪♪ 310 00:14:55,551 --> 00:14:59,000 TO LOSE MY BABY BROTHER -- HE HAD SO MUCH LIFE IN HIM. 311 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,965 HE JUST WANTED SO MUCH OUT OF LIFE, 312 00:15:00,965 --> 00:15:04,068 AND I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD'VE WENT BEFORE HIM. 313 00:15:04,068 --> 00:15:06,448 SO I GOT SENT TO A MENTAL FACILITY 314 00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:09,068 FOR A COUPLE OF WEEKS UNTIL THEY WERE CONFIDENT 315 00:15:09,068 --> 00:15:11,172 THAT I WASN'T GONNA HARM MYSELF AGAIN. 316 00:15:11,172 --> 00:15:16,000 BUT I'VE STILL NEVER FULLY GOTTEN OVER THAT. 317 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,965 I STILL CARRY A LOT OF GUILT FROM THAT DAY, 318 00:15:19,965 --> 00:15:23,931 BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I COULD'VE SAVED HIM. 319 00:15:23,931 --> 00:15:27,275 I FEEL LIKE MAYBE IF I WOULD'VE WOKE HIM UP EARLIER, 320 00:15:27,275 --> 00:15:29,965 HE WOULDN'T HAVE PASSED AWAY. 321 00:15:29,965 --> 00:15:32,413 THAT WAS A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO, 322 00:15:32,413 --> 00:15:35,068 AND I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO PULL MYSELF OUT OF THE DEPRESSION 323 00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,000 I'VE HAD SINCE THEN 324 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,206 AND THE PATTERN OF JUST EATING. 325 00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:41,103 WHENEVER I'M FEELING BAD, ALL I KNOW HOW TO DO IS 326 00:15:41,103 --> 00:15:43,758 JUST LAY IN BED AND JUST EAT. 327 00:15:43,758 --> 00:15:47,620 THIS ROOM AND THIS HOUSE ARE MY WHOLE WORLD MOST DAYS. 328 00:15:47,620 --> 00:15:49,000 AND IN THE EVENINGS FOR DINNER, 329 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,068 MY MOM WILL COME OVER TO HELP ME COOK 330 00:15:51,068 --> 00:15:53,241 AND TRY TO GET ME TO COME OUT OF MY ROOM, 331 00:15:53,241 --> 00:15:58,137 BECAUSE SHE KNOWS I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR FOOD. 332 00:15:58,137 --> 00:16:02,448 Destinee: HEY, SUGAR BEE. HOW YOU DOING, DELICIOUS? 333 00:16:02,448 --> 00:16:04,137 ALL RIGHT. 334 00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:06,965 [ LAUGHTER ] 335 00:16:06,965 --> 00:16:08,206 HOW YOU FEELING? 336 00:16:08,206 --> 00:16:09,620 ALL RIGHT. I'M SO HUNGRY. 337 00:16:09,620 --> 00:16:11,413 -YOU HUNGRY? OKAY. -YEAH. 338 00:16:11,413 --> 00:16:14,724 -THANK YOU. -WELCOME. 339 00:16:14,724 --> 00:16:17,241 -I LOVE YOU. -I LOVE YOU, TOO. 340 00:16:17,241 --> 00:16:19,965 Destinee: I'M JUST 27. 341 00:16:19,965 --> 00:16:23,172 I HAVE SO MUCH THAT I WANT TO DO AND THAT I NEED TO DO. 342 00:16:23,172 --> 00:16:26,448 AND I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE NOW, 343 00:16:26,448 --> 00:16:30,965 WHERE I JUST LAY HERE ALL DAY AND WAIT FOR FOOD. 344 00:16:30,965 --> 00:16:33,689 AND I DON'T SEE ANY OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS 345 00:16:33,689 --> 00:16:36,482 UNLESS THEY COME TO SEE ME, 346 00:16:36,482 --> 00:16:40,551 AND IT'S MOSTLY ONLY MY SISTER AND MOM. 347 00:16:40,551 --> 00:16:42,793 WHEN I COME OVER, IT'S MOSTLY TO GET 348 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:45,241 DESTINEE OUT OF THE BED -- TO GET HER UP, 349 00:16:45,241 --> 00:16:47,482 'CAUSE SHE'S USUALLY JUST LAYING DOWN. 350 00:16:47,482 --> 00:16:49,551 ♪♪ 351 00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:52,172 YOU GONNA COME OR NOT? 352 00:16:52,172 --> 00:16:54,896 YES, I AM. 353 00:16:54,896 --> 00:16:57,827 YOU NEED HELP? 354 00:16:57,827 --> 00:16:59,689 HOLD ON. 355 00:16:59,689 --> 00:17:09,103 ♪♪ 356 00:17:09,103 --> 00:17:12,586 I FEEL LIKE ALL I'M CONSTANTLY DOING IS JUST TRYING TO ESCAPE 357 00:17:12,586 --> 00:17:17,379 ALL MY DEPRESSION AND PAIN AT THIS POINT. 358 00:17:17,379 --> 00:17:20,344 AND FOOD IS THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO TURN TO TO DO THAT. 359 00:17:20,344 --> 00:17:24,103 ♪♪ 360 00:17:24,103 --> 00:17:26,517 BUT THE THING THAT'S SAVING ME EVERY DAY 361 00:17:26,517 --> 00:17:29,344 IS ALSO WHAT'S DESTROYING MY LIFE NOW, 362 00:17:29,344 --> 00:17:34,034 TO THE POINT WHERE I CAN FEEL IT KILLING ME. 363 00:17:34,034 --> 00:17:35,482 I KNOW THERE IS JUST NO WAY 364 00:17:35,482 --> 00:17:37,620 I'M GONNA SURVIVE FOR A LOT LONGER, 365 00:17:37,620 --> 00:17:40,103 BECAUSE MY BODY CAN'T TAKE GETTING ANY BIGGER 366 00:17:40,103 --> 00:17:43,310 THAN I'VE ALREADY LET IT. 367 00:17:43,310 --> 00:17:46,862 MY SITUATION IS AT A BREAKING POINT. 368 00:17:46,862 --> 00:17:48,103 I NEED TO GET HELP. 369 00:17:48,103 --> 00:17:49,793 I NEED TO BE ABLE TO LOSE THIS WEIGHT, 370 00:17:49,793 --> 00:17:53,068 OR THEY'RE GONNA BE BURYING ME NEXT. 371 00:17:53,068 --> 00:17:56,137 BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I COULD LIVE TO NEXT YEAR 372 00:17:56,137 --> 00:17:58,758 BEING THIS BIG. 373 00:17:58,758 --> 00:18:01,965 AT THIS RATE, I GIVE MYSELF A COUPLE MONTHS. 374 00:18:01,965 --> 00:18:05,103 AND THAT'S NOT THE FUTURE I SHOULD BE FACING, 375 00:18:05,103 --> 00:18:08,758 BEFORE I'VE HARDLY EVEN HAD A CHANCE TO LIVE MY LIFE. 376 00:18:08,758 --> 00:18:11,724 SO AS IMPOSSIBLE AND HOPELESS AS IT SEEMS TO ME 377 00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:16,896 TO TRY AND CHANGE AND GIVE UP EATING LIKE I DO, 378 00:18:16,896 --> 00:18:21,379 I'M READY TO TRY AND FIND A WAY BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. 379 00:18:21,379 --> 00:18:25,862 BECAUSE IF I DON'T, THEN I KNOW I'M ABOUT TO DIE. 380 00:18:25,862 --> 00:18:28,310 SO I HAVE TO AT LEAST TRY. 381 00:18:28,310 --> 00:18:31,413 ♪♪ 382 00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:41,103 ♪♪ 383 00:18:41,103 --> 00:18:47,965 ♪♪ 384 00:18:47,965 --> 00:18:49,965 Destinee: TODAY, I'M GONNA TRY TO DRIVE TO HOUSTON 385 00:18:49,965 --> 00:18:53,931 BECAUSE I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE DR. NOW THIS AFTERNOON. 386 00:18:53,931 --> 00:18:55,517 NUNA CALLED AND SET IT FOR ME. 387 00:18:55,517 --> 00:18:58,482 AND SHE AND MY MOM ARE GONNA GO WITH ME TO HELP ME GET THERE, 388 00:18:58,482 --> 00:19:00,482 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA HANDLE 389 00:19:00,482 --> 00:19:02,758 BEING IN A CAR THAT LONG. 390 00:19:02,758 --> 00:19:05,068 IT'S ONLY ABOUT A FOUR-HOUR DRIVE, 391 00:19:05,068 --> 00:19:07,379 BUT MY LIMIT IF I TRY TO DRIVE SOMEWHERE 392 00:19:07,379 --> 00:19:10,448 IS NORMALLY AROUND 10 TO 15 MINUTES. 393 00:19:10,448 --> 00:19:12,965 SO THIS IS GONNA BE A WHOLE NEW EXPERIENCE FOR ME, 394 00:19:12,965 --> 00:19:16,000 AND I'M HOPING I CAN MAKE IT. 395 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:18,724 I KNOW I CAN'T HANDLE DOING THIS TRIP TWICE IN ONE DAY, 396 00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:22,172 SO WE'RE STAYING IN HOUSTON FOR THE NIGHT AND THEN COMING BACK. 397 00:19:22,172 --> 00:19:26,068 BUT IT'S STILL GONNA BE A LOT FOR ME, SO I'M REALLY NERVOUS. 398 00:19:26,068 --> 00:19:27,862 AND A LOT OF THINGS ARE GOING THROUGH MY HEAD. 399 00:19:27,862 --> 00:19:30,758 I'M NERVOUS THAT IF DR. NOW DOESN'T TAKE ME AS A PATIENT, 400 00:19:30,758 --> 00:19:33,344 I WOULDN'T HAVE ANYBODY TO HELP ME WITH MY WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY. 401 00:19:33,344 --> 00:19:38,068 SO WHEN I THINK ABOUT THE DOUBT AND HIM NOT TAKING ME, 402 00:19:38,068 --> 00:19:40,034 IT KIND OF MAKES ME SAD. 403 00:19:40,034 --> 00:19:42,862 ♪♪ 404 00:19:42,862 --> 00:19:44,310 -HEY, HONEY. -HEY. 405 00:19:44,310 --> 00:19:48,827 CAN YOU HELP ME FOLD SOME AND PUT THEM IN NOW? 406 00:19:48,827 --> 00:19:51,793 I KNOW THIS IS MY ABSOLUTE LAST CHANCE TO GET THE HELP 407 00:19:51,793 --> 00:19:56,379 I HAVE TO HAVE TO SAVE MY LIFE AND AVOID AN EARLY DEATH, 408 00:19:56,379 --> 00:19:58,206 SO THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS 409 00:19:58,206 --> 00:20:00,793 I'M GONNA EVER DO IN MY LIFE. 410 00:20:00,793 --> 00:20:04,965 SO I'M NOT LETTING ANY OF MY EMOTIONS AND FEARS STOP ME, 411 00:20:04,965 --> 00:20:06,896 AND THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT 412 00:20:06,896 --> 00:20:09,275 IS MY BODY BEING ABLE TO MAKE IT. 413 00:20:09,275 --> 00:20:15,965 ♪♪ 414 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:17,896 -ARE Y'ALL READY? -YEAH. 415 00:20:17,896 --> 00:20:20,689 WE JUST FINISHED PACKING. SO YOU READY FOR THAT LONG DRIVE? 416 00:20:20,689 --> 00:20:22,000 YEAH. 417 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,586 IT'S GONNA BE A BIG DAY, A LONG DAY. 418 00:20:23,586 --> 00:20:25,413 I'M READY WHENEVER Y'ALL ARE. 419 00:20:25,413 --> 00:20:28,034 I'M THELMA, YOU'RE LOUISE. I'M BONNIE, SHE CLYDE. 420 00:20:28,034 --> 00:20:30,413 -[ LAUGHS ] -LET'S GO. 421 00:20:30,413 --> 00:20:32,103 ♪♪ 422 00:20:32,103 --> 00:20:35,241 Nuna: IT'S VERY IMPORTANT FOR DESTINEE TO GO TO THIS DOCTOR APPOINTMENT 423 00:20:35,241 --> 00:20:37,862 BECAUSE SHE NEEDS THE PROPER HELP. 424 00:20:37,862 --> 00:20:40,310 RIGHT NOW, I JUST FEEL LIKE SHE'S MISERABLE. 425 00:20:40,310 --> 00:20:42,137 SHE CAN'T REALLY LIVE HER LIFE HOW SHE WANTS TO 426 00:20:42,137 --> 00:20:44,827 BECAUSE SHE'S PICKED UP ON SO MUCH WEIGHT. 427 00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:47,586 TIME TO GO, BABY. 428 00:20:47,586 --> 00:20:49,413 Destinee: MY SISTER IS TOO YOUNG TO DRIVE, 429 00:20:49,413 --> 00:20:52,103 AND MY MOM HAS REALLY BAD EYESIGHT. 430 00:20:52,103 --> 00:20:55,965 SO I HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO DRIVE. 431 00:20:55,965 --> 00:20:58,620 SO THAT'S GONNA MAKE THIS A LITTLE TOUGHER, 432 00:20:58,620 --> 00:21:03,103 BECAUSE THE DRIVER'S SIDE IS EVEN MORE CRAMPED. 433 00:21:03,103 --> 00:21:04,758 MY STOMACH GOES UP TO THE WHEEL 434 00:21:04,758 --> 00:21:07,517 AND ALMOST PUSHES AGAINST IT TOO MUCH, 435 00:21:07,517 --> 00:21:09,241 SO IT'S GONNA BE A TIGHT FIT, 436 00:21:09,241 --> 00:21:12,206 AND I'M NOT GONNA GET THE CHANCE TO LEAN BACK MUCH. 437 00:21:12,206 --> 00:21:14,793 ♪♪ 438 00:21:14,793 --> 00:21:16,758 BUT AT LEAST I FIT. 439 00:21:16,758 --> 00:21:21,620 I JUST HOPE I CAN LAST FOUR HOURS LIKE THIS. 440 00:21:21,620 --> 00:21:24,896 BUT IF I WANT THIS CHANCE, I KNOW I HAVE TO. 441 00:21:24,896 --> 00:21:30,724 ♪♪ 442 00:21:30,724 --> 00:21:36,551 ♪♪ 443 00:21:36,551 --> 00:21:38,965 WE FINALLY MADE IT TO HOUSTON, 444 00:21:38,965 --> 00:21:43,931 AND I'VE COME ABOUT ALMOST 300 MILES TO SEE THIS DOCTOR. 445 00:21:43,931 --> 00:21:48,000 I'M FEELING A CERTAIN PAIN IN MY LEG AND IN MY SIDES. 446 00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:52,172 I HAVE A LOT OF SWELLING IN MY LEGS AND NEUROPATHY, 447 00:21:52,172 --> 00:21:55,758 AND THE PAIN IS PRETTY BAD. 448 00:21:55,758 --> 00:21:59,275 BUT MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, I'M REALLY HUNGRY. 449 00:21:59,275 --> 00:22:01,448 WE ONLY STOPPED ONCE AT A GAS STATION, 450 00:22:01,448 --> 00:22:04,137 AND I GOT A SANDWICH AND CHIPS. 451 00:22:04,137 --> 00:22:07,034 BUT I HAVEN'T REALLY EATEN MUCH THESE LAST FOUR HOURS, 452 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:08,482 AND I'M GONNA HAVE TO EAT SOMETHING 453 00:22:08,482 --> 00:22:11,655 RIGHT AFTER I SEE DR. NOW. 454 00:22:11,655 --> 00:22:14,206 BUT ON THE PLUS SIDE, MAYBE HAVING AN EMPTY STOMACH 455 00:22:14,206 --> 00:22:18,344 WILL HELP ME WEIGH A FEW POUNDS LESS WHEN I GET ON THE SCALE. 456 00:22:18,344 --> 00:22:21,206 BUT WHATEVER HAPPENS AND HOWEVER MUCH I WEIGH, 457 00:22:21,206 --> 00:22:24,931 I JUST HOPE I GET THE HELP I NEED TODAY. 458 00:22:24,931 --> 00:22:27,551 AND THE ONLY THING THAT REALLY HAS ME SCARED 459 00:22:27,551 --> 00:22:29,379 IS THE POSSIBILITY THAT DR. NOW 460 00:22:29,379 --> 00:22:33,827 COULD SAY HE DOESN'T THINK HE CAN TREAT ME. 461 00:22:33,827 --> 00:22:36,344 DESTINEE LaSHAEE? 462 00:22:36,344 --> 00:22:38,965 IF THAT HAPPENS, IT'S GONNA BE LIKE BEING TOLD 463 00:22:38,965 --> 00:22:40,517 I'M GONNA DIE 464 00:22:40,517 --> 00:22:43,689 AND THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO TO CHANGE THAT. 465 00:22:43,689 --> 00:22:45,827 AND I'M NOT READY FOR THAT. 466 00:22:45,827 --> 00:22:52,793 ♪♪ 467 00:22:52,793 --> 00:22:56,344 I'M A LITTLE SHOCKED. 468 00:22:56,344 --> 00:22:59,758 OKAY, YOU GUYS CAN GO AHEAD AND GO TO ROOM 5. 469 00:22:59,758 --> 00:23:01,827 I'M GLAD I'M STILL IN THE 600s, 470 00:23:01,827 --> 00:23:04,172 BUT IT'S STILL A REALLY HIGH NUMBER. 471 00:23:04,172 --> 00:23:08,206 SO I'M EMBARRASSED AT HOW BAD I'VE LET MY SITUATION GET, 472 00:23:08,206 --> 00:23:11,344 AND IT'S IMPORTANT I GET THE HELP I NEED TODAY 473 00:23:11,344 --> 00:23:13,448 SO I CAN CHANGE THIS. 474 00:23:13,448 --> 00:23:15,034 ♪♪ 475 00:23:15,034 --> 00:23:17,862 -HELLO. -HELLO. 476 00:23:17,862 --> 00:23:19,241 I'M DR. NOWZARADAN. 477 00:23:19,241 --> 00:23:21,310 I'M DESTINEE. NICE TO MEET YOU. 478 00:23:21,310 --> 00:23:23,689 NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO. AND YOU ARE? 479 00:23:23,689 --> 00:23:25,965 -I'M NUNA. -AND YOU? 480 00:23:25,965 --> 00:23:28,827 -I'M CHASITY. -ALL RIGHT. HOW Y'ALL DOING? 481 00:23:28,827 --> 00:23:31,862 -I'M GOOD. AND YOU? -I'M VERY GOOD, THANK YOU. 482 00:23:31,862 --> 00:23:34,931 ALL RIGHT. YOU'RE COMING FROM, UH, WHERE? 483 00:23:34,931 --> 00:23:36,689 UH, PINEVILLE, LOUISIANA. 484 00:23:36,689 --> 00:23:38,448 OKAY. SO, HOW WAS THE TRIP? 485 00:23:38,448 --> 00:23:40,482 YOU MADE IT OKAY?YES, SIR. 486 00:23:40,482 --> 00:23:43,413 I'M JUST A LITTLE SORE, BUT I'M OKAY. 487 00:23:43,413 --> 00:23:47,724 ALL RIGHT. SO YOU ARE 668 POUNDS. 488 00:23:47,724 --> 00:23:50,517 SO, I TAKE IT YOU HAVE BEEN TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT 489 00:23:50,517 --> 00:23:52,482 AND YOU'RE HERE FOR SOME HELP. 490 00:23:52,482 --> 00:23:54,586 -I HAVEN'T BEEN TRYING. -YOU HAVEN'T? 491 00:23:54,586 --> 00:23:56,068 NO, SIR. 492 00:23:56,068 --> 00:23:59,896 SO, DO YOU WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT? WHAT IS THE PLAN? 493 00:23:59,896 --> 00:24:03,655 THE PLAN IS TO TRY TO GET YOUR SUPPORT AND YOUR HELP 494 00:24:03,655 --> 00:24:06,758 TO WHERE I CAN TRY TO GET MY LIFE BACK ON TRACK. 495 00:24:06,758 --> 00:24:08,310 OKAY. 496 00:24:08,310 --> 00:24:10,655 SO, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM THAT YOU WANT TO ADDRESS? 497 00:24:10,655 --> 00:24:12,586 BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT GIVING ME THE IMPRESSION 498 00:24:12,586 --> 00:24:15,000 YOU'RE VERY INTERESTED IN LOSING WEIGHT. 499 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:18,068 WELL, I DO, BUT I HAVE A LOT OF, UM -- 500 00:24:18,068 --> 00:24:19,655 I'VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT. 501 00:24:19,655 --> 00:24:24,655 AND I THINK I HAVE A LOT OF EMOTIONAL EATING PROBLEMS. 502 00:24:24,655 --> 00:24:26,724 ALL RIGHT. SUCH AS WHAT? 503 00:24:26,724 --> 00:24:28,931 WELL, UM, I'VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT, 504 00:24:28,931 --> 00:24:31,379 BEING TRANSGENDER AND GAY 505 00:24:31,379 --> 00:24:33,724 AND, YOU KNOW, BEING PICKED ON A LOT 506 00:24:33,724 --> 00:24:38,413 AND JUST GROWING UP JUST STRUGGLING 507 00:24:38,413 --> 00:24:41,689 AND JUST NOT BEING ABLE TO FIND A GOOD JOB AND STUFF. 508 00:24:41,689 --> 00:24:43,586 AND THE LOSS OF MY BROTHER 509 00:24:43,586 --> 00:24:46,482 IS WHERE I REALLY PICKED UP A LOT OF WEIGHT. 510 00:24:46,482 --> 00:24:48,793 OKAY. I UNDERSTAND ALL THAT. 511 00:24:48,793 --> 00:24:51,241 BUT HOW DOES ANY OF THAT JUSTIFY 512 00:24:51,241 --> 00:24:54,068 OVEREATING TO THE POINT WHERE YOU'RE HURTING YOURSELF 513 00:24:54,068 --> 00:24:56,827 AND, ULTIMATELY, SHORTENING YOUR LIFE? 514 00:24:56,827 --> 00:24:58,862 I DON'T KNOW. I THINK IT'S A LOT OF -- 515 00:24:58,862 --> 00:25:01,620 A LOT OF TO DO WITH MY EMOTIONS AND STUFF. 516 00:25:01,620 --> 00:25:03,068 OKAY. 517 00:25:03,068 --> 00:25:05,758 BUT IF YOU THINK YOU HAVE A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES 518 00:25:05,758 --> 00:25:08,034 THAT ARE A CAUSE OF YOUR OVEREATING, 519 00:25:08,034 --> 00:25:11,827 HAVE BEEN SEEING A THERAPIST TO TRY TO DEAL WITH THAT? 520 00:25:11,827 --> 00:25:13,344 NO, SIR. 521 00:25:13,344 --> 00:25:17,241 SO YOU HAVE REALLY NOT DONE ANYTHING TO TRY TO CHANGE 522 00:25:17,241 --> 00:25:19,241 YOUR EATING HABIT AND LOSE WEIGHT. 523 00:25:19,241 --> 00:25:20,862 NO, SIR. 524 00:25:20,862 --> 00:25:23,517 I ASSUME YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO TURN YOUR LIFE AROUND 525 00:25:23,517 --> 00:25:25,862 AND LOSE WEIGHT TO HAVE THE LIFE YOU WANT. 526 00:25:25,862 --> 00:25:27,620 -YES, SIR. -OKAY. 527 00:25:27,620 --> 00:25:31,206 SO, WHAT WOULD YOU WANT TO SEE IN YOUR LIFE IN 10 YEARS? 528 00:25:31,206 --> 00:25:32,827 HOW DO YOU SEE WHERE YOU'RE GONNA BE 529 00:25:32,827 --> 00:25:34,275 AND WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO? 530 00:25:34,275 --> 00:25:36,931 IN 10 YEARS, I WANT TO SEE MYSELF HAVING A FAMILY. 531 00:25:36,931 --> 00:25:40,103 I WANT TO GET MARRIED. I WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN. 532 00:25:40,103 --> 00:25:42,448 I WANT TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL JOB. 533 00:25:42,448 --> 00:25:46,034 I WANT TO JUST LIVE LIFE. 534 00:25:46,034 --> 00:25:47,724 THOSE ARE ALL GOOD GOALS. 535 00:25:47,724 --> 00:25:50,448 BUT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING TO BE ABLE TO DO ANY OF THAT 536 00:25:50,448 --> 00:25:52,517 IF YOU KEEP EATING LIKE YOU HAVE? 537 00:25:52,517 --> 00:25:54,310 NO, SIR. 538 00:25:54,310 --> 00:25:56,965 TELL ME ABOUT YOUR EATING HABITS. 539 00:25:56,965 --> 00:26:02,000 I, UM -- I TEND TO SLEEP A LOT DURING THE DAY. 540 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,448 AND THEN, LIKE, I'LL WAKE UP IN THE AFTERNOON, 541 00:26:04,448 --> 00:26:06,413 AND I'LL MAYBE EAT, LIKE, A BIG MEAL. 542 00:26:06,413 --> 00:26:09,482 AND THEN AT NIGHT, I'LL EAT A BIG MEAL, AS WELL. 543 00:26:09,482 --> 00:26:11,655 DO YOU EAT AT HOME, OR YOU EAT OUT? 544 00:26:11,655 --> 00:26:15,827 I EAT MOSTLY AT HOME, OR SOMETIMES I'LL GO EAT OUT. 545 00:26:15,827 --> 00:26:17,517 WHO COOKS FOR YOU? 546 00:26:17,517 --> 00:26:20,620 SOMETIMES I'LL COOK, OR MY MOM WILL COME OVER, 547 00:26:20,620 --> 00:26:22,206 AND WE'LL COOK TOGETHER. 548 00:26:22,206 --> 00:26:24,103 DOES SHE BRING FOOD FOR YOU? 549 00:26:24,103 --> 00:26:25,827 SOMETIMES SHE'LL BRING FOOD FOR ME, 550 00:26:25,827 --> 00:26:27,620 AND SHE'LL COME OVER AND HELP ME COOK. 551 00:26:27,620 --> 00:26:29,275 AND MY SISTER HELPS ME, AS WELL. 552 00:26:29,275 --> 00:26:31,896 AND YOU BRING THAT TO HELP OUT, 553 00:26:31,896 --> 00:26:34,379 OR ARE YOU JUST, UM, DOING THAT TO...? 554 00:26:34,379 --> 00:26:37,137 NO. WE JUST COOK, LIKE, FAMILY MEALS. 555 00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:39,827 SO, ARE YOU GONNA BE ENABLING, 556 00:26:39,827 --> 00:26:42,551 OR ARE YOU GONNA BE HELPING? 557 00:26:42,551 --> 00:26:43,862 NO, I'M GONNA HELP. 558 00:26:43,862 --> 00:26:47,413 IN FACT, WE ARE -- MY DAUGHTER, TOO. 559 00:26:47,413 --> 00:26:50,448 I HOPE SO, BECAUSE SHE'S NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS 560 00:26:50,448 --> 00:26:52,482 IF YOU CONTINUE TO ENABLE HER 561 00:26:52,482 --> 00:26:54,517 AND DON'T GIVE HER THE SUPPORT SHE NEEDS. 562 00:26:54,517 --> 00:26:58,137 SO THE DYNAMIC BETWEEN YOU ALL NEED TO CHANGE NOW. 563 00:26:58,137 --> 00:27:00,034 -YES. -OKAY. 564 00:27:00,034 --> 00:27:02,413 -ANY QUESTIONS? -NO, SIR. 565 00:27:02,413 --> 00:27:04,931 -JUST READY TO GET STARTED. -OKAY. 566 00:27:04,931 --> 00:27:07,827 WE'RE GONNA GET YOU ON A 1,200-CALORIE DIET, 567 00:27:07,827 --> 00:27:11,724 WHICH IS GONNA BE EATING 400 CALORIE PER MEAL... 568 00:27:11,724 --> 00:27:13,827 -OKAY. -...HIGH-PROTEIN, NO-CARB DIET. 569 00:27:13,827 --> 00:27:16,586 -YES, SIR. -START ON THAT IMMEDIATELY. 570 00:27:16,586 --> 00:27:20,689 AND I WANT YOU TO LOSE 80 POUNDS IN THE NEXT TWO MONTHS, OKAY? 571 00:27:20,689 --> 00:27:24,068 AND THAT'S GONNA BE A GOAL THAT WE'RE GONNA WORK TOWARD, OKAY? 572 00:27:24,068 --> 00:27:26,793 AND IF YOU DO THAT AND YOU WANT TO DO THIS PROGRAM, 573 00:27:26,793 --> 00:27:29,379 THEN I'LL APPROVE YOU FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 574 00:27:29,379 --> 00:27:30,793 OKAY. 575 00:27:30,793 --> 00:27:32,724 AND WE'RE GONNA START YOU ON PSYCHOTHERAPY 576 00:27:32,724 --> 00:27:36,034 BECAUSE IF YOU KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES 577 00:27:36,034 --> 00:27:38,689 BEHIND YOUR PATHOLOGICAL OVEREATING, 578 00:27:38,689 --> 00:27:41,689 THEN A BIG PRIORITY WILL BE THAT WE NEED 579 00:27:41,689 --> 00:27:44,413 TO GET YOUR EMOTIONAL ISSUE UNDER CONTROL. 580 00:27:44,413 --> 00:27:45,965 OKAY. 581 00:27:45,965 --> 00:27:49,379 BECAUSE WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY IS NOT GOING TO BE HELPFUL 582 00:27:49,379 --> 00:27:52,896 IF YOU STILL GOT EMOTIONALLY DRIVEN TO FOOD. 583 00:27:52,896 --> 00:27:54,275 -YES, SIR. -OKAY? 584 00:27:54,275 --> 00:27:57,068 SO THIS IS GONNA BE A VERY DIFFICULT SITUATION 585 00:27:57,068 --> 00:27:58,586 TO GET YOU OUT OF THIS.YES, SIR. 586 00:27:58,586 --> 00:28:00,034 SO WE HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO, 587 00:28:00,034 --> 00:28:02,310 BUT IT ALL STARTS WITH YOU SHOWING ME 588 00:28:02,310 --> 00:28:04,482 THAT YOU'RE WILLING TO WORK HARD TO DO THIS. 589 00:28:04,482 --> 00:28:06,931 AND YOU CAN DO THAT BY HITTING THE WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL. 590 00:28:06,931 --> 00:28:08,482 OKAY. 591 00:28:08,482 --> 00:28:10,862 IS THAT SOMETHING YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE READY TO DO? 592 00:28:10,862 --> 00:28:12,517 -YES, SIR. -GREAT. 593 00:28:12,517 --> 00:28:14,586 YOU'RE NOT GONNA BE MOBILE FOR MUCH LONGER 594 00:28:14,586 --> 00:28:16,103 WITH THE WAY YOU ARE. 595 00:28:16,103 --> 00:28:17,689 AND ONCE YOU BECOME BEDRIDDEN, 596 00:28:17,689 --> 00:28:21,758 YOUR HEALTH IS GONNA START TO DECLINE RAPIDLY AT THAT POINT. 597 00:28:21,758 --> 00:28:25,103 SO THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO CHANGE THAT IF YOU WANT. GOT IT? 598 00:28:25,103 --> 00:28:27,344 YES, SIR. I FEEL LIKE I'M READY. 599 00:28:27,344 --> 00:28:29,724 GOOD. WELL, NICE TO MEET YOU. 600 00:28:29,724 --> 00:28:32,793 AND I'LL LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING YOU IN A COUPLE MONTHS. 601 00:28:32,793 --> 00:28:34,379 THANK YOU SO MUCH. I APPRECIATE YOU. 602 00:28:34,379 --> 00:28:35,551 ALL RIGHT. 603 00:28:35,551 --> 00:28:37,034 -THANK YOU. -ALL RIGHT. NICE TO MEET YOU. 604 00:28:37,034 --> 00:28:38,517 -NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO. -THANK YOU SO MUCH. 605 00:28:38,517 --> 00:28:40,413 MM-HMM. 606 00:28:40,413 --> 00:28:45,931 ♪♪ 607 00:28:45,931 --> 00:28:48,931 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M CONCERNED RIGHT NOW THAT DESTINEE IS NOT REALLY 608 00:28:48,931 --> 00:28:53,413 THAT COMMITTED TO DOING WHAT SHE NEEDS TO TURN HER LIFE AROUND. 609 00:28:53,413 --> 00:28:56,448 SHE SEEMS RELUCTANT ABOUT EVEN LOSING THE WEIGHT 610 00:28:56,448 --> 00:29:00,068 AND TURNING AROUND THE LEVEL OF PATHOLOGICAL EATING IT TAKES 611 00:29:00,068 --> 00:29:02,862 TO GET OVER 600 POUNDS. 612 00:29:02,862 --> 00:29:07,344 TO SUCCESSFULLY LOSE AROUND 450 POUNDS AND THEN KEEP IT OFF 613 00:29:07,344 --> 00:29:10,586 IS GOING TO TAKE A LOT OF TOOLS TO ACCOMPLISH, 614 00:29:10,586 --> 00:29:14,000 ESPECIALLY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY AND PSYCHOTHERAPY. 615 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:15,965 BUT ALL OF THAT WILL BE USELESS 616 00:29:15,965 --> 00:29:19,724 IF DESTINEE ISN'T WILLING TO PUT IN THE WORK SHE NEEDS, 617 00:29:19,724 --> 00:29:23,000 BECAUSE NONE OF THIS WILL DO THE WORK FOR HER. 618 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:25,965 SO THIS IS ALL ULTIMATELY IN HER HANDS. 619 00:29:25,965 --> 00:29:29,137 AND IF SHE WANTS TO MOVE AHEAD AND GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, 620 00:29:29,137 --> 00:29:31,931 THEN SHE NEEDS TO START BY WORKING TO HIT THE GOAL 621 00:29:31,931 --> 00:29:33,413 I HAVE GIVEN HER 622 00:29:33,413 --> 00:29:35,931 AND SHOW ME SHE'S AS COMMITTED AS SHE NEEDS 623 00:29:35,931 --> 00:29:38,275 AND THAT SHE'S READY TO DO THIS. 624 00:29:38,275 --> 00:29:41,344 ♪♪ 625 00:29:41,344 --> 00:29:45,034 Destinee: I'M RELIEVED THAT DR. NOW IS WILLING TO HELP ME. 626 00:29:45,034 --> 00:29:48,344 FINDING THAT OUT HAS LIFTED A WEIGHT OFF OF ME. 627 00:29:48,344 --> 00:29:49,758 BUT I'M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED 628 00:29:49,758 --> 00:29:52,689 THAT I HAVE TO DO A DIET TO START. 629 00:29:52,689 --> 00:29:56,379 AND TO LOSE 80 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS IS A LOT. 630 00:29:56,379 --> 00:29:59,344 BUT IF THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO GET DR. NOW'S HELP, 631 00:29:59,344 --> 00:30:01,413 THEN I'LL TRY TO WORK AS HARD AS I CAN 632 00:30:01,413 --> 00:30:04,344 TO GET TO THAT GOAL BEFORE I COME BACK. 633 00:30:04,344 --> 00:30:07,379 BECAUSE IF I FAIL AT THIS, IT WILL COST ME MY LIFE. 634 00:30:07,379 --> 00:30:09,310 ♪♪ 635 00:30:12,448 --> 00:30:19,517 ♪♪ 636 00:30:19,517 --> 00:30:26,620 ♪♪ 637 00:30:26,620 --> 00:30:29,724 Destinee: THIS LAST MONTH HAS BEEN A BIT OF AN ADJUSTMENT. 638 00:30:29,724 --> 00:30:32,000 DR. NOW'S DIET ISN'T EASY. 639 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:36,241 IT CUTS OUT A LOT OF STUFF THAT I LIKE TO EAT, 640 00:30:36,241 --> 00:30:40,379 AND IT'S BEEN HARD TO CHANGE ALL THAT AND ADAPT. 641 00:30:40,379 --> 00:30:43,758 BUT I HAVE BEEN WORKING AT IT, 642 00:30:43,758 --> 00:30:47,068 AND I DO FEEL LIKE I'M MAKING PROGRESS. 643 00:30:47,068 --> 00:30:50,103 MY CLOTHES FEEL LIKE THEY'RE FITTING A LITTLE BETTER, 644 00:30:50,103 --> 00:30:51,896 AND I'M LOOKING SMALLER. 645 00:30:51,896 --> 00:30:54,517 SO I FEEL GOOD ABOUT THAT, 646 00:30:54,517 --> 00:30:56,482 AS LONG AS I DON'T LOSE MY BREASTS, 647 00:30:56,482 --> 00:31:00,172 BECAUSE MY BREASTS HELP ME FEEL LIKE A WOMAN. 648 00:31:00,172 --> 00:31:04,068 BUT OVERALL, I'M MAKING GOOD PROGRESS. 649 00:31:04,068 --> 00:31:06,620 SO ALL THAT'S REALLY ENCOURAGING 650 00:31:06,620 --> 00:31:10,000 AND HELPS TO MOTIVATE ME TO KEEP GOING. 651 00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:13,482 ♪♪ 652 00:31:13,482 --> 00:31:16,310 I'M MOSTLY MAKING A LOT OF SALAD. 653 00:31:16,310 --> 00:31:21,413 IT'S LOW-CALORIE, SO I CAN HAVE AS MUCH OF IT AS I WANT. 654 00:31:21,413 --> 00:31:25,551 AND I'M ALSO EATING A LOT OF PROTEIN. 655 00:31:25,551 --> 00:31:29,275 BUT WITHOUT SOME OF WHAT I LIKE TO EAT, IT'S BEEN HARD TO FIGHT 656 00:31:29,275 --> 00:31:33,068 ALL THE SADNESS AND DEPRESSION I HAVE. 657 00:31:33,068 --> 00:31:35,379 BUT I'M NOT LETTING THAT MESS ME UP, 658 00:31:35,379 --> 00:31:38,655 AND I'M STICKING WITH IT. 659 00:31:38,655 --> 00:31:41,620 THANKFULLY, THE EXERCISING HASN'T BEEN AS HARD. 660 00:31:41,620 --> 00:31:43,000 ♪♪ 661 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:46,379 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 662 00:31:46,379 --> 00:31:48,413 COME IN. 663 00:31:48,413 --> 00:31:49,965 HEY! 664 00:31:49,965 --> 00:31:52,103 -HEY, HONEY. -HOW YOU DOING? 665 00:31:52,103 --> 00:31:53,310 I'M GOOD. 666 00:31:53,310 --> 00:31:54,862 YOU READY TO GO FOR OUR DAILY WALK? 667 00:31:54,862 --> 00:31:57,758 -YEAH, I'M READY FOR IT. -GOOD. LET'S GO. 668 00:31:57,758 --> 00:32:00,620 I TOLD ONE OF MY OLD FRIENDS WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO, 669 00:32:00,620 --> 00:32:04,172 AND I ASKED HER IF SHE'D START DOING MY WALKS WITH ME. 670 00:32:04,172 --> 00:32:08,275 SO SHE'S BEEN COMING OVER EVERY DAY TO DO THAT WITH ME, 671 00:32:08,275 --> 00:32:11,862 AND WE JUST WALK DOWN THE ROAD AND BACK. 672 00:32:11,862 --> 00:32:17,482 THE FIRST WEEK WAS THE HARDEST, BUT I CAN GO FURTHER NOW, 673 00:32:17,482 --> 00:32:20,965 AND IT'S NICE TO FEEL THAT PROGRESS. 674 00:32:20,965 --> 00:32:22,862 SO HOW'S THE DIET BEEN GOING? 675 00:32:22,862 --> 00:32:24,724 WELL, I HAVE A GOAL OF 80 POUNDS SOON. 676 00:32:24,724 --> 00:32:28,068 SO AS LONG I JUST KEEP LOSING, I'M FINE WITH THAT. 677 00:32:28,068 --> 00:32:29,620 -THAT'S GOOD. -THAT'S MY GOAL. 678 00:32:29,620 --> 00:32:32,344 I CAN SEE YOU'RE LOSING A LITTLE WEIGHT IN YOUR FACE. 679 00:32:32,344 --> 00:32:34,137 YEAH, I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN LOSING A LOT. 680 00:32:34,137 --> 00:32:36,827 JUST KEEP YOUR FAITH. YOU'RE GONNA DO IT. 681 00:32:36,827 --> 00:32:38,379 I WILL. 682 00:32:38,379 --> 00:32:42,344 [ LAUGHING ] 683 00:32:42,344 --> 00:32:45,241 I REBUKE SATAN. 684 00:32:45,241 --> 00:32:47,344 I KNOW I ONLY HAVE ONE MORE MONTH 685 00:32:47,344 --> 00:32:50,068 BEFORE MY NEXT APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW, 686 00:32:50,068 --> 00:32:51,620 SO THERE'S NOT A LOT OF TIME 687 00:32:51,620 --> 00:32:54,517 TO MAKE THE REST OF THE PROGRESS I NEED. 688 00:32:54,517 --> 00:32:56,551 SO I'M NOT GONNA LET MYSELF SLOW DOWN 689 00:32:56,551 --> 00:32:58,241 BECAUSE WHEN I SEE HIM, 690 00:32:58,241 --> 00:33:01,448 I WANT TO MAKE DR. NOW PROUD BY HITTING HIS GOAL 691 00:33:01,448 --> 00:33:03,724 AND GETTING APPROVED FOR MY SURGERY. 692 00:33:03,724 --> 00:33:12,862 ♪♪ 693 00:33:12,862 --> 00:33:14,620 ME AND MY MOM ARE BACK IN HOUSTON 694 00:33:14,620 --> 00:33:16,862 FOR MY SECOND APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW, 695 00:33:16,862 --> 00:33:20,241 WHERE WE FIND OUT WHETHER I MADE IT TO MY GOAL OR NOT. 696 00:33:20,241 --> 00:33:22,655 AND I'M EXTREMELY ANXIOUS. 697 00:33:22,655 --> 00:33:25,068 ♪♪ 698 00:33:25,068 --> 00:33:27,482 THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT APPOINTMENT 699 00:33:27,482 --> 00:33:30,551 BECAUSE IT'S WHERE I FIND OUT HOW WELL I DID 700 00:33:30,551 --> 00:33:32,896 AND WHETHER OR NOT I HIT MY GOAL 701 00:33:32,896 --> 00:33:34,206 AND THEN WHETHER I GET APPROVED 702 00:33:34,206 --> 00:33:36,827 FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY LIKE I NEED. 703 00:33:36,827 --> 00:33:39,965 BUT I'VE WORKED SO VERY HARD FOR THIS, 704 00:33:39,965 --> 00:33:41,793 AND I'M JUST HOPING THAT ALL THAT WORK 705 00:33:41,793 --> 00:33:46,172 IS REFLECTED ON THE NUMBER THE SCALE GIVES TODAY. 706 00:33:46,172 --> 00:33:48,517 DESTINEE? 707 00:33:48,517 --> 00:33:50,448 AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT TWO MONTHS AGO, 708 00:33:50,448 --> 00:33:52,827 MY WEIGHT WAS 668. 709 00:33:52,827 --> 00:33:55,517 AND DR. NOW TOLD ME I NEEDED TO LOSE 80 POUNDS 710 00:33:55,517 --> 00:33:57,413 BY TODAY'S APPOINTMENT, 711 00:33:57,413 --> 00:34:00,379 SO THAT MEANS I NEED TO BE BELOW 588. 712 00:34:00,379 --> 00:34:09,758 ♪♪ 713 00:34:09,758 --> 00:34:13,137 I'M DISAPPOINTED IT'S NOT A BIGGER LOSS, 714 00:34:13,137 --> 00:34:16,000 BUT IT'S STILL WEIGHT LOSS AND PROGRESS. 715 00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:18,517 SO I'M HOPING THAT DR. NOW SEES THAT I'M MOVING 716 00:34:18,517 --> 00:34:20,517 IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION 717 00:34:20,517 --> 00:34:23,620 AND FOCUSES ON THAT AND THE PROGRESS I DID MAKE. 718 00:34:23,620 --> 00:34:30,241 ♪♪ 719 00:34:30,241 --> 00:34:31,517 -HELLO. -HELLO. 720 00:34:31,517 --> 00:34:33,034 -HELLO. -HOW ARE Y'ALL DOING? 721 00:34:33,034 --> 00:34:34,896 -I'M GOOD. AND YOU? -WE'RE GOOD. 722 00:34:34,896 --> 00:34:37,620 I'M JUST FINE, THANK YOU. OKAY. 723 00:34:37,620 --> 00:34:40,655 SO, YOU'RE DOWN TO 644. 724 00:34:40,655 --> 00:34:41,931 YES, SIR. 725 00:34:41,931 --> 00:34:44,862 WHICH IS A LOSS OF 24 POUNDS OVER TWO MONTHS, 726 00:34:44,862 --> 00:34:47,379 WHEN YOUR GOAL WAS TO LOSE 80 IN THAT TIME. 727 00:34:47,379 --> 00:34:48,862 I'M NOT GONNA LIE. 728 00:34:48,862 --> 00:34:51,310 I MADE A BAD CHOICE, AND I WENT TO GO GET SOME BAD FOOD. 729 00:34:51,310 --> 00:34:53,931 BUT IMMEDIATELY AFTER THAT, I FELT BAD ABOUT IT 730 00:34:53,931 --> 00:34:57,137 AND GOT BACK ON MY DIET AND STUFF. 731 00:34:57,137 --> 00:34:58,965 AND RIGHT AFTER THAT, 732 00:34:58,965 --> 00:35:01,586 I GOT HIT WITH BAD NEWS ABOUT MY MAMA. 733 00:35:01,586 --> 00:35:03,689 SHE'S BEEN HAVING A LOT OF HEART PROBLEMS, 734 00:35:03,689 --> 00:35:05,137 SO THEY'RE TRYING TO SEE HOW MUCH 735 00:35:05,137 --> 00:35:06,896 BLOCKAGE SHE HAS ON HER HEART AND STUFF. 736 00:35:06,896 --> 00:35:08,965 SO I'VE BEEN STRESSED OUT A LOT BECAUSE OF THAT. 737 00:35:08,965 --> 00:35:10,551 I'M NOT GONNA LIE. 738 00:35:10,551 --> 00:35:13,931 WELL, I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU TWO ARE DEALING WITH THAT. 739 00:35:13,931 --> 00:35:17,275 BUT STRESS IS PART OF OUR LIFE, OKAY? 740 00:35:17,275 --> 00:35:21,551 AND THERE'S NO WAY THAT WE CAN LIVE THROUGH THIS LIFE 741 00:35:21,551 --> 00:35:22,965 WITHOUT HAVING STRESS. 742 00:35:22,965 --> 00:35:24,344 YES, SIR. 743 00:35:24,344 --> 00:35:27,000 BUT WE SHOULD NOT LET STRESS MAKE US EAT UNHEALTHY. 744 00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:28,482 -YES, SIR. -OKAY? 745 00:35:28,482 --> 00:35:31,689 YOU EITHER WANT TO DO THIS, OR YOU DON'T. 746 00:35:31,689 --> 00:35:33,689 RIGHT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE YOU DON'T, 747 00:35:33,689 --> 00:35:36,517 BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT SHOWING ME THERE IS ANY REAL DESIRE 748 00:35:36,517 --> 00:35:39,724 WITH YOU TO PUT ANY EFFORT INTO SAVING YOUR LIFE. 749 00:35:39,724 --> 00:35:42,586 SO IF YOU WANT TO MOVE FORWARD, IT'S VERY SIMPLE. 750 00:35:42,586 --> 00:35:44,655 SHOW ME THE PROGRESS YOU NEED TO MAKE. 751 00:35:44,655 --> 00:35:46,103 OKAY. 752 00:35:46,103 --> 00:35:48,103 DESTINEE, I'M GONNA GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE 753 00:35:48,103 --> 00:35:51,448 TO LOSE 80 POUNDS OVER THE NEXT TWO MONTHS, OKAY? 754 00:35:51,448 --> 00:35:53,000 OH, OKAY. 755 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,758 YOU DO THAT, I'LL APPROVE YOU FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 756 00:35:55,758 --> 00:35:58,206 BUT IF YOU DON'T, THEN I'LL KNOW YOU STILL DON'T HAVE 757 00:35:58,206 --> 00:36:00,344 ANY INTEREST IN WORKING AT THIS 758 00:36:00,344 --> 00:36:02,655 AND THAT WE ARE WASTING OUR TIME. 759 00:36:02,655 --> 00:36:05,965 AND THERE WILL BE NO POINT IN MOVING AHEAD WITH YOU, GOT IT? 760 00:36:05,965 --> 00:36:07,724 -YES, SIR. -ALL RIGHT. 761 00:36:07,724 --> 00:36:09,206 I'LL SEE YOU IN TWO MONTHS. 762 00:36:09,206 --> 00:36:11,000 IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, LET ME KNOW. 763 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:12,551 -OKAY. YES, SIR. -OKAY? 764 00:36:12,551 --> 00:36:14,172 THANK YOU SO MUCH. I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU. 765 00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:16,103 ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. YOU'RE WELCOME. 766 00:36:16,103 --> 00:36:19,586 AND GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR HEART TEST, OKAY? 767 00:36:19,586 --> 00:36:21,344 -THANK YOU. -THANK YOU. I APPRECIATE IT. 768 00:36:21,344 --> 00:36:22,862 ALL RIGHT. WE'LL SEE Y'ALL LATER. 769 00:36:22,862 --> 00:36:24,724 -ALL RIGHT. I'M-A DO GOOD. -GOOD. 770 00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:26,862 -ALL RIGHT. -ALL RIGHT. SEE YOU THEN. 771 00:36:26,862 --> 00:36:28,896 ALL RIGHT. 772 00:36:28,896 --> 00:36:31,275 ♪♪ 773 00:36:31,275 --> 00:36:33,931 Dr. Nowzaradan: DESTINEE'S POOR PROGRESS OVER THE LAST TWO MONTHS 774 00:36:33,931 --> 00:36:35,758 IS VERY DISAPPOINTING. 775 00:36:35,758 --> 00:36:38,068 AND IT LEAVES ME WITH THE SAME CONCERNS 776 00:36:38,068 --> 00:36:42,275 I ORIGINALLY HAD THAT SHE'S NOT FULLY COMMITTED TO DOING THIS 777 00:36:42,275 --> 00:36:45,482 AND EXPECTS ALL THE HARD WORK TO BE DONE FOR HER. 778 00:36:45,482 --> 00:36:47,965 SHE'S BEEN GIVEN A CHANCE TO SAVE HER LIFE. 779 00:36:47,965 --> 00:36:50,206 AND IF SHE'S NOT GONNA TAKE IT SERIOUSLY, 780 00:36:50,206 --> 00:36:52,931 THEN THE SURGERY AND EVERYTHING WE DO FOR HER 781 00:36:52,931 --> 00:36:55,206 WILL EVENTUALLY FAIL, 782 00:36:55,206 --> 00:36:58,172 AND WHATEVER PROGRESS SHE MAKES WILL BE UNDONE. 783 00:36:58,172 --> 00:37:00,689 SO THERE IS NOTHING MORE WE CAN DO FOR HER 784 00:37:00,689 --> 00:37:03,310 UNTIL SHE STARTS DOING WHAT SHE NEEDS 785 00:37:03,310 --> 00:37:06,068 AND SHOW ME SHE WON'T END UP WASTING THE TOOLS 786 00:37:06,068 --> 00:37:08,241 AND OPPORTUNITY WE GIVE HER. 787 00:37:08,241 --> 00:37:11,413 ♪♪ 788 00:37:11,413 --> 00:37:13,172 Destinee: I'M NOT GONNA LIE. 789 00:37:13,172 --> 00:37:14,413 I'M REALLY DISAPPOINTED 790 00:37:14,413 --> 00:37:16,896 THAT I DIDN'T GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 791 00:37:16,896 --> 00:37:20,827 I PUT IN A LOT OF HARD WORK OVER THE LAST TWO MONTHS, 792 00:37:20,827 --> 00:37:23,000 AND I DON'T FEEL THAT WAS RECOGNIZED 793 00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:26,172 OR THAT ANY CREDIT WAS GIVEN FOR THAT. 794 00:37:26,172 --> 00:37:30,344 BUT I GUESS THE ONLY OPTION I HAVE NOW IS TO TRY AGAIN. 795 00:37:30,344 --> 00:37:32,517 IT'S EITHER THAT, OR I GIVE UP. 796 00:37:32,517 --> 00:37:34,310 AND I CAN'T GIVE UP, BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN 797 00:37:34,310 --> 00:37:37,931 GIVING UP ON EVERYTHING, INCLUDING MY LIFE. 798 00:37:37,931 --> 00:37:42,103 SO IT'S NOT REALLY A CHOICE. I HAVE TO DO THIS. 799 00:37:42,103 --> 00:37:43,275 ♪♪ 800 00:37:46,758 --> 00:37:55,655 ♪♪ 801 00:37:55,655 --> 00:38:04,655 ♪♪ 802 00:38:04,655 --> 00:38:07,103 Destinee: I'VE GIVEN MY SITUATION A LOT OF THOUGHT, 803 00:38:07,103 --> 00:38:11,379 AND I'VE DECIDED I WANT TO MOVE TO HOUSTON. 804 00:38:11,379 --> 00:38:16,000 I FOUND AN APARTMENT, AND IT'S READY FOR ME TO MOVE ON. 805 00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:19,103 SO I RENTED A MOVING TRUCK AND HIRED SOME MOVERS. 806 00:38:19,103 --> 00:38:23,551 AND ONCE I GET ALL PACKED UP, I'M HEADED THERE. 807 00:38:23,551 --> 00:38:24,862 DR. NOW TOLD ME 808 00:38:24,862 --> 00:38:26,517 I ACTUALLY DIDN'T NEED TO MOVE TO HOUSTON 809 00:38:26,517 --> 00:38:27,965 SINCE I'M ALREADY CLOSE ENOUGH 810 00:38:27,965 --> 00:38:30,793 TO BE ABLE TO DRIVE TO HIM EASILY, 811 00:38:30,793 --> 00:38:35,724 BUT THIS IS SOMETHING I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO DO. 812 00:38:35,724 --> 00:38:40,551 BEING HERE, I'M STUCK IN A LOT OF MY OLD PATTERNS AND WAYS. 813 00:38:40,551 --> 00:38:43,172 AND I THINK THE BEST WAY TO START TO BREAK THOSE 814 00:38:43,172 --> 00:38:45,448 IS TO GET OUT OF MY OLD ENVIRONMENT 815 00:38:45,448 --> 00:38:49,482 AND INTO A NEW ONE WHERE I CAN START NEW HEALTHY HABITS. 816 00:38:49,482 --> 00:38:51,620 AND I WANT TO BE CLOSER TO DR. NOW 817 00:38:51,620 --> 00:38:54,344 AND SHOW HIM THAT I'M READY TO COMPLETELY COMMIT 818 00:38:54,344 --> 00:38:57,103 TO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO DO HIS PROGRAM. 819 00:38:57,103 --> 00:38:59,241 AND ON TOP OF ALL THAT, I FEEL LIKE 820 00:38:59,241 --> 00:39:03,655 I FACED A LOT OF JUDGEMENT HERE AS A LARGE TRANSGENDER PERSON. 821 00:39:03,655 --> 00:39:06,551 AND I KNOW THAT'LL BE TRUE NO MATTER WHERE I AM, 822 00:39:06,551 --> 00:39:08,344 BUT I'LL BE ABLE TO FIND MORE PEOPLE 823 00:39:08,344 --> 00:39:11,103 THAT WILL ACCEPT ME IN A BIG CITY. 824 00:39:11,103 --> 00:39:14,068 ♪♪ 825 00:39:14,068 --> 00:39:16,448 SO AS MUCH AS I'LL MISS MY FAMILY, 826 00:39:16,448 --> 00:39:19,103 IT'S TIME TO SPREAD MY WINGS AND FLY. 827 00:39:19,103 --> 00:39:21,827 ♪♪ 828 00:39:21,827 --> 00:39:24,724 BUT AT LEAST FOR A WHILE, I'M NOT GONNA TELL DR. NOW 829 00:39:24,724 --> 00:39:26,793 BECAUSE I'M MOVING BY MYSELF, 830 00:39:26,793 --> 00:39:28,137 AND ONE OF HIS REQUIREMENTS 831 00:39:28,137 --> 00:39:31,448 IS THAT YOU HAVE SOMEONE WITH YOU TO HELP YOU. 832 00:39:31,448 --> 00:39:34,551 AND I'M GONNA BE DOING IT COMPLETELY ON MY OWN. 833 00:39:34,551 --> 00:39:37,275 MY MOM WAS GONNA GO WITH ME TO HELP ME FOR A WHILE, 834 00:39:37,275 --> 00:39:41,310 BUT SHE'S SICK RIGHT NOW, SO SHE'S NOT COMING. 835 00:39:41,310 --> 00:39:44,241 BUT I'LL TELL DR. NOW ONCE HE SEES MY PROGRESS 836 00:39:44,241 --> 00:39:47,241 SO HE KNOWS I CAN DO THIS ON MY OWN. 837 00:39:47,241 --> 00:39:52,413 ♪♪ 838 00:39:52,413 --> 00:39:57,655 ♪♪ 839 00:39:57,655 --> 00:40:00,034 -GIRL, I -- -Oh, what happened? 840 00:40:00,034 --> 00:40:01,931 I JUST GOT TO FINISH THIS, UM -- 841 00:40:01,931 --> 00:40:04,103 FINISH GETTING THIS STUFF OUT THE HOUSE 842 00:40:04,103 --> 00:40:07,000 AND TRY TO GET ON THIS ROAD. -Okay. 843 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:08,827 YOU BETTER STOP ALL THAT CRYING. 844 00:40:08,827 --> 00:40:10,931 [ Sniffles ] 845 00:40:10,931 --> 00:40:12,965 I LOVE YOU. I'M-A, UM, TEXT YOU. 846 00:40:12,965 --> 00:40:14,551 I love you, too. 847 00:40:14,551 --> 00:40:18,413 I'M-A TEXT YOU AS SOON AS I, UH, GET ON THE ROAD AND STUFF. 848 00:40:18,413 --> 00:40:20,344 -Okay. -ALL RIGHT, BYE. 849 00:40:20,344 --> 00:40:25,758 ♪♪ 850 00:40:25,758 --> 00:40:29,379 IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY, BUT IT'S WHAT I HAVE TO DO. 851 00:40:29,379 --> 00:40:33,862 ♪♪ 852 00:40:33,862 --> 00:40:35,620 BECAUSE IF I DON'T GET THIS SURGERY, 853 00:40:35,620 --> 00:40:37,931 I HAVE NOTHING -- 854 00:40:37,931 --> 00:40:41,724 NO LIFE, NO FUTURE, NO HOPE, NOTHING. 855 00:40:41,724 --> 00:40:43,965 ♪♪ 856 00:40:43,965 --> 00:40:46,586 SO I'LL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO MAKE SURE 857 00:40:46,586 --> 00:40:49,241 I GET APPROVED AT MY NEXT APPOINTMENT, 858 00:40:49,241 --> 00:40:50,862 AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR THAT 859 00:40:50,862 --> 00:40:53,413 SO I CAN START MY NEW LIFE IN THE BIG CITY, 860 00:40:53,413 --> 00:40:55,965 LIKE I'VE DREAMED OF DOING MY WHOLE LIFE. 861 00:40:55,965 --> 00:41:04,206 ♪♪ 862 00:41:04,206 --> 00:41:12,379 ♪♪ 863 00:41:12,379 --> 00:41:20,551 ♪♪ 864 00:41:20,551 --> 00:41:22,724 I'M CURRENTLY IN HOUSTON. 865 00:41:22,724 --> 00:41:24,896 I MADE IT. 866 00:41:24,896 --> 00:41:27,172 I DROVE STRAIGHT HERE WITH NO STOPS 867 00:41:27,172 --> 00:41:30,172 BECAUSE I JUST WANTED TO GET HERE. 868 00:41:30,172 --> 00:41:31,620 THANKFULLY, THIS IS A BIG TRUCK, 869 00:41:31,620 --> 00:41:34,896 SO I HAVEN'T BEEN CRAMPED LIKE I HAVE BEEN IN MY CAR. 870 00:41:34,896 --> 00:41:39,068 ♪♪ 871 00:41:39,068 --> 00:41:41,620 BUT I'M STILL SORE FROM SITTING UP FOR SO LONG, 872 00:41:41,620 --> 00:41:44,172 AND I'M READY TO GET OUT AND STRETCH MY LEGS, EAT, 873 00:41:44,172 --> 00:41:46,000 AND USE THE BATHROOM. 874 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:49,275 BUT FIRST, I HAVE TO GET MOVED IN. 875 00:41:49,275 --> 00:41:51,137 I'M MEETING THE APARTMENT MANAGER 876 00:41:51,137 --> 00:41:53,827 TO GET THE APARTMENT I'M RENTING. 877 00:41:53,827 --> 00:41:55,827 AND ONCE I GET IN AND HAVE ACCESS, 878 00:41:55,827 --> 00:41:57,965 I'M CALLING THE MOVERS SO THEY CAN COME MEET ME 879 00:41:57,965 --> 00:42:02,896 AND UNLOAD ALL MY STUFF SO I CAN GET SETTLED IN. 880 00:42:02,896 --> 00:42:05,034 -HI. -HEY, TORY. 881 00:42:05,034 --> 00:42:07,241 I'M GOOD. AND YOU? 882 00:42:07,241 --> 00:42:09,344 YEAH, I'M READY. 883 00:42:09,344 --> 00:42:11,344 ♪♪ 884 00:42:11,344 --> 00:42:14,068 I'M GUESSING IT WILL TAKE AT LEAST A FEW HOURS, 885 00:42:14,068 --> 00:42:17,034 BUT I'M HOPING TO GET IT DONE AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE 886 00:42:17,034 --> 00:42:20,103 SO I CAN REST. 887 00:42:20,103 --> 00:42:23,689 OKAY. OHH. 888 00:42:25,689 --> 00:42:28,482 OH, YEAH? I DON'T KNOW. 889 00:42:31,758 --> 00:42:35,206 WAIT. THIS IS THE -- 890 00:42:35,206 --> 00:42:37,862 NO WAY. THIS ISN'T RIGHT. 891 00:42:44,034 --> 00:42:46,586 OH, [BLEEP]. OH, MY. THIS IS TOO MUCH. 892 00:42:46,586 --> 00:42:54,758 ♪♪ 893 00:42:54,758 --> 00:42:59,068 OH, [BLEEP] [BLEEP]. 894 00:42:59,068 --> 00:43:01,620 THIS ISN'T WHAT I WAS EXPECTING. 895 00:43:01,620 --> 00:43:03,241 THE CABINETS ARE DIRTY. 896 00:43:03,241 --> 00:43:05,482 THERE ARE SCUFF MARKS EVERYWHERE ON THE WALLS. 897 00:43:05,482 --> 00:43:08,379 AND I REFUSE TO STAY IN A PLACE LIKE THIS. 898 00:43:08,379 --> 00:43:11,448 OH, NO... 899 00:43:11,448 --> 00:43:15,068 THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS AND UNACCEPTABLE, 900 00:43:15,068 --> 00:43:20,275 AND THEY NEED TO FIX THIS, BECAUSE I'M NOT MOVING. 901 00:43:20,275 --> 00:43:22,068 ABOUT TO JUST GO TO THE HOTEL. 902 00:43:22,068 --> 00:43:24,137 [BLEEP] MUCH. 903 00:43:24,137 --> 00:43:25,448 Woman: Many concerns can be resolved 904 00:43:25,448 --> 00:43:28,310 Once our location is aware of your experience. 905 00:43:28,310 --> 00:43:30,448 [ BEEP ] 906 00:43:30,448 --> 00:43:32,586 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. 907 00:43:32,586 --> 00:43:34,620 NO ONE'S GETTING BACK TO ME RIGHT NOW, 908 00:43:34,620 --> 00:43:37,000 SO I GUESS I DON'T HAVE A PLACE TO LIVE TONIGHT. 909 00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:38,586 AND I'M TOO TIRED TO DEAL WITH THIS, 910 00:43:38,586 --> 00:43:40,655 SO I JUST NEED TO GET A HOTEL. 911 00:43:40,655 --> 00:43:46,862 ♪♪ 912 00:43:46,862 --> 00:43:50,827 ALL THIS IS NOT TURNING OUT TO BE A GREAT NIGHT IN HOUSTON. 913 00:43:50,827 --> 00:43:52,965 HOPEFULLY, TOMORROW GETS BETTER. 914 00:43:52,965 --> 00:43:57,586 [ DOOR-AJAR BELL DINGING ] 915 00:43:57,586 --> 00:44:02,137 BUT SO FAR, THIS HASN'T BEEN WHAT I EXPECTED. 916 00:44:02,137 --> 00:44:05,310 AND THE LAST THING I NEED IS ALL THIS ADDED STRESS 917 00:44:05,310 --> 00:44:07,620 WHEN I'M TRYING TO GET MY LIFE RIGHT. 918 00:44:07,620 --> 00:44:11,413 ♪♪ 919 00:44:11,413 --> 00:44:15,137 I HAVEN'T EATEN ALL DAY, AND I'M STARVING. 920 00:44:15,137 --> 00:44:17,724 AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS GET SOME FAST FOOD 921 00:44:17,724 --> 00:44:20,068 TO FORGET ABOUT ALL THIS, 922 00:44:20,068 --> 00:44:22,103 BUT I'M TRYING HARD TO DO WHAT I NEED. 923 00:44:22,103 --> 00:44:27,724 SO I CAN'T, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO MESS UP MY PROGRESS. 924 00:44:27,724 --> 00:44:31,034 I HAVE A RESERVATION FOR MATTHEW VENTRESS. 925 00:44:31,034 --> 00:44:33,413 -ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. -NO PROBLEM. 926 00:44:33,413 --> 00:44:36,379 ♪♪ 927 00:44:36,379 --> 00:44:40,137 BUT HAVING TO DEAL WITH THIS IS THE LAST THING I NEEDED, 928 00:44:40,137 --> 00:44:43,620 SO I'M DISAPPOINTED RIGHT NOW. 929 00:44:43,620 --> 00:44:48,275 AND I'M NOT SURE DOING THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA, 930 00:44:48,275 --> 00:44:51,620 BECAUSE NOW I'M ALONE IN A BIG CITY 931 00:44:51,620 --> 00:44:53,758 WITH EVERYTHING GOING WRONG, 932 00:44:53,758 --> 00:44:56,586 AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS EAT. 933 00:44:56,586 --> 00:44:59,689 AND I'M SCARED I'M REALLY CLOSE TO JUST GIVING IN. 934 00:44:59,689 --> 00:45:04,103 ♪♪ 935 00:45:08,241 --> 00:45:13,586 ♪♪ 936 00:45:13,586 --> 00:45:19,034 ♪♪ 937 00:45:19,034 --> 00:45:22,241 Destinee: I'M HEADED BACK TO THE APARTMENT COMPLEX THIS MORNING. 938 00:45:22,241 --> 00:45:23,862 THE MOVERS ARE GONNA MEET ME THERE 939 00:45:23,862 --> 00:45:26,206 AND GET ALL MY STUFF THERE TO MY NEW PLACE, 940 00:45:26,206 --> 00:45:28,827 SO I'LL HOPEFULLY BE SETTLED IN SOON. 941 00:45:28,827 --> 00:45:32,965 ♪♪ 942 00:45:32,965 --> 00:45:36,931 MAKING THE MOVE DOWN HERE HASN'T GONE AS PLANNED SO FAR. 943 00:45:36,931 --> 00:45:41,655 THE PLACE THEY HAD FOR ME WASN'T TO MY LIKING. 944 00:45:41,655 --> 00:45:43,827 OH, LORDY. 945 00:45:43,827 --> 00:45:47,137 SO I WAS HOPING THEY COULD GET ME IN A BETTER UNIT, 946 00:45:47,137 --> 00:45:50,034 BUT UNFORTUNATELY THAT'S NOT GONNA BE SOMETHING THEY COULD DO 947 00:45:50,034 --> 00:45:53,103 FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER MONTH OR SO. 948 00:45:53,103 --> 00:45:55,862 AND CONSIDERING I HAVE NO OTHER OPTIONS, 949 00:45:55,862 --> 00:45:58,448 I REALLY DON'T HAVE A CHOICE. 950 00:45:58,448 --> 00:46:01,344 AND I DON'T NEED TO BE DEALING WITH THIS, WHEN I SHOULD BE ABLE 951 00:46:01,344 --> 00:46:06,655 TO JUST FOCUS TO GET TO MY GOAL BEFORE I SEE DR. NOW AGAIN. 952 00:46:06,655 --> 00:46:10,965 BUT INSTEAD, I'M IN A SITUATION WHERE I'M REALLY STRUGGLING. 953 00:46:10,965 --> 00:46:13,862 SO THIS HAS BEEN REALLY FRUSTRATING. 954 00:46:13,862 --> 00:46:15,965 THE ONLY POSITIVE THING TO DEVELOP 955 00:46:15,965 --> 00:46:18,275 WAS THAT A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE WHO LIVES HERE IN HOUSTON 956 00:46:18,275 --> 00:46:22,068 SAID SHE'D HELP ME OUT WHILE I WAS DOWN HERE. 957 00:46:22,068 --> 00:46:24,931 HER NAME IS SANTANA. HER SISTER LIVED IN PINEVILLE. 958 00:46:24,931 --> 00:46:28,206 AND WE USED TO COME VISIT HER HERE IN HOUSTON TOGETHER. 959 00:46:28,206 --> 00:46:30,379 SO I'M REALLY HAPPY TO RECONNECT WITH HER 960 00:46:30,379 --> 00:46:34,586 AND TO FEEL LIKE I HAVE SOMEONE HERE IN HOUSTON. 961 00:46:34,586 --> 00:46:36,689 -OKAY, PULL! -PUSH! 962 00:46:36,689 --> 00:46:38,344 Man: PULL IT. PULL IT! 963 00:46:38,344 --> 00:46:41,896 Santana: RIGHT NOW, IT'S REALLY HARD FOR DESTINEE TO MOVE ALONE. 964 00:46:41,896 --> 00:46:46,034 AND SO I WANTED TO COME AND HELP OUT WITH THAT. 965 00:46:46,034 --> 00:46:48,172 I LIVE HERE IN HOUSTON, MAYBE 20 MINUTES AWAY 966 00:46:48,172 --> 00:46:49,655 FROM DESTINEE'S APARTMENT. 967 00:46:49,655 --> 00:46:53,827 SO IT'S GONNA BE REAL NICE TO DROP IN ON HER SOMETIMES. 968 00:46:53,827 --> 00:46:55,931 I THINK IT'S GREAT THAT DESTINEE MOVED TO HOUSTON 969 00:46:55,931 --> 00:46:57,586 TO BE CLOSER TO THE DOCTOR, 970 00:46:57,586 --> 00:47:00,517 BUT IT'S EVEN BETTER THAT SHE'S CLOSER TO ME. 971 00:47:00,517 --> 00:47:03,068 [ LAUGHS ] 972 00:47:03,068 --> 00:47:05,206 Destinee: NOW I JUST NEED TO GET MOVED IN 973 00:47:05,206 --> 00:47:06,758 SO I CAN RE-CENTER MYSELF 974 00:47:06,758 --> 00:47:09,379 AND GET BACK TO DOING WHAT I NEED. 975 00:47:09,379 --> 00:47:11,413 WITH EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY, 976 00:47:11,413 --> 00:47:13,068 I GAVE IN A LITTLE 977 00:47:13,068 --> 00:47:17,758 AND ORDERED SOME STUFF IN THE HOTEL THAT WASN'T ON MY DIET. 978 00:47:17,758 --> 00:47:19,862 AND THAT CAN'T CONTINUE, BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE 979 00:47:19,862 --> 00:47:22,827 ONE MONTH LEFT BEFORE I SEE DR. NOW. 980 00:47:22,827 --> 00:47:25,344 AND EVERYTHING I WANT IS COMPLETELY RIDING ON ME 981 00:47:25,344 --> 00:47:28,344 HITTING MY GOAL, AND I HAVE TO MAKE SURE 982 00:47:28,344 --> 00:47:32,551 I'M DOING EVERYTHING I SHOULD TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY. 983 00:47:32,551 --> 00:47:36,344 AND ONCE I GET MOVED IN AND THIS STRESS IS BEHIND ME, 984 00:47:36,344 --> 00:47:38,758 I'LL HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH THAT. 985 00:47:38,758 --> 00:47:41,172 -THANK YOU. -THANK YOU. I APPRECIATE YOU. 986 00:47:41,172 --> 00:47:44,827 Santana: I AM SO TIRED. LIKE, I'M EXHAUSTED. 987 00:47:44,827 --> 00:47:51,103 ♪♪ 988 00:47:51,103 --> 00:47:57,344 ♪♪ 989 00:47:57,344 --> 00:47:59,827 I'VE BEEN IN HOUSTON FOR A MONTH NOW, 990 00:47:59,827 --> 00:48:03,034 AND THE TRANSITION DOWN HERE AND BEING AWAY FROM MY FAMILY 991 00:48:03,034 --> 00:48:06,655 HASN'T BEEN AN EASY ADJUSTMENT. 992 00:48:06,655 --> 00:48:09,344 BUT LATELY, I'VE BEEN STRUGGLING WITH FEELING LONELY, 993 00:48:09,344 --> 00:48:12,620 AND I'M A LITTLE DEPRESSED BECAUSE OF THAT. 994 00:48:12,620 --> 00:48:15,310 I THINK THE MAIN STRESS WHILE I'VE BEEN OUT HERE IS MY MOM -- 995 00:48:15,310 --> 00:48:20,827 HER BEING SICK, AND JUST ME NOT BEING CLOSE TO HER. 996 00:48:20,827 --> 00:48:22,827 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M LETTING HER DOWN IN A WEIRD WAY 997 00:48:22,827 --> 00:48:24,689 AND THAT I SHOULD BE THERE FOR HER 998 00:48:24,689 --> 00:48:27,275 WHILE SHE HAS HER HEART ISSUES. 999 00:48:27,275 --> 00:48:28,793 SO WITH ALL THIS STRESS, 1000 00:48:28,793 --> 00:48:32,724 I KNOW I LET THAT TAKE A TOLL ON MY EATING HABITS. 1001 00:48:32,724 --> 00:48:34,137 I'VE DEFINITELY HAD CRAVINGS, 1002 00:48:34,137 --> 00:48:37,241 BUT I'M TRYING TO STICK TO WHAT I'M DOING. 1003 00:48:37,241 --> 00:48:40,310 IT'S DEFINITELY HARD PASSING UP THOSE FAST-FOOD PLACES 1004 00:48:40,310 --> 00:48:42,172 THAT I'M USED TO GOING TO. 1005 00:48:42,172 --> 00:48:46,379 I'LL BE LIKE, "NO, DON'T DO IT. NO, DON'T DO IT." 1006 00:48:46,379 --> 00:48:48,379 ♪♪ 1007 00:48:48,379 --> 00:48:50,551 BUT A FEW TIMES, I DID. 1008 00:48:50,551 --> 00:48:52,413 I GAVE IN. 1009 00:48:52,413 --> 00:48:54,896 SO I'M FOCUSING ON SALADS AGAIN 1010 00:48:54,896 --> 00:48:57,068 AND TRYING TO FILL UP WITH THOSE 1011 00:48:57,068 --> 00:48:59,862 AND MAKING SURE I HAVE MORE PROTEIN MIXED IN 1012 00:48:59,862 --> 00:49:03,206 AND MOSTLY WATER TO DRINK. 1013 00:49:03,206 --> 00:49:05,482 THOSE MEALS DON'T REALLY HIT THE SPOT, 1014 00:49:05,482 --> 00:49:07,034 BUT I'M STILL HOLDING OUT HOPE 1015 00:49:07,034 --> 00:49:09,724 FOR A GOOD DRESSING THAT'S LOW-CALORIE. 1016 00:49:09,724 --> 00:49:12,896 BUT FOR NOW, I TRY TO SEASON IT AS MUCH AS I CAN. 1017 00:49:12,896 --> 00:49:19,724 ♪♪ 1018 00:49:19,724 --> 00:49:22,137 I CALLED DR. NOW'S CLINIC AND TOLD HIM 1019 00:49:22,137 --> 00:49:25,793 I NEED AN EXTRA MONTH BEFORE I COME BACK TO SEE HIM. 1020 00:49:25,793 --> 00:49:29,344 I WAS TOO SCARED TO TALK DIRECTLY TO DR. NOW, 1021 00:49:29,344 --> 00:49:32,931 SO I JUST TOLD WHOEVER PICKED UP THE PHONE. 1022 00:49:32,931 --> 00:49:36,551 BUT I'M GUESSING HE WASN'T TOO HAPPY ABOUT THAT. 1023 00:49:36,551 --> 00:49:38,655 BUT WITH THIS LITTLE BIT OF EXTRA TIME, 1024 00:49:38,655 --> 00:49:42,103 I KNOW I CAN GET BACK ON TRACK. 1025 00:49:42,103 --> 00:49:44,448 SO THIS MIGHT BE A LITTLE BIT OF A DELAY, 1026 00:49:44,448 --> 00:49:47,689 BUT I'M USING THIS EXTRA TIME TO WORK HARD, 1027 00:49:47,689 --> 00:49:51,448 AND I STILL FEEL LIKE I'M MAKING PROGRESS. 1028 00:49:51,448 --> 00:49:55,862 I'VE ALSO STARTED BACK UP WITH MY WALKS AND EXERCISES, 1029 00:49:55,862 --> 00:49:59,000 AND I FEEL GOOD ABOUT THAT. 1030 00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,551 I THINK ABOUT THE LIFE I WANT 1031 00:50:00,551 --> 00:50:02,586 AND REMIND MYSELF WHY I'M DOING THIS 1032 00:50:02,586 --> 00:50:05,827 TO MOTIVATE MYSELF SOME MORE. 1033 00:50:05,827 --> 00:50:08,482 SO OVERALL, I THINK I'M DOING WELL. 1034 00:50:08,482 --> 00:50:10,793 AND I FEEL CONFIDENT THAT I'LL MAKE IT TO MY GOAL 1035 00:50:10,793 --> 00:50:12,896 BEFORE I SEE DR. NOW. 1036 00:50:12,896 --> 00:50:18,034 ♪♪ 1037 00:50:18,034 --> 00:50:23,241 ♪♪ 1038 00:50:23,241 --> 00:50:26,482 I'VE HAD SEVERE STOMACH PAIN FOR A FEW DAYS NOW, 1039 00:50:26,482 --> 00:50:30,586 SO MY MOM CAME DOWN TO HELP ME AND BE WITH ME. 1040 00:50:30,586 --> 00:50:34,551 SHE CALLED DR. NOW AND TOLD HIM WHAT'S GOING ON, 1041 00:50:34,551 --> 00:50:37,758 AND HE SAID I NEED TO COME TO HIS CLINIC NOW. 1042 00:50:37,758 --> 00:50:41,068 SO I'M A LITTLE SCARED ABOUT WHAT MIGHT BE WRONG. 1043 00:50:41,068 --> 00:50:42,896 AND ON TOP OF THAT, I DON'T FEEL LIKE 1044 00:50:42,896 --> 00:50:45,448 I'M READY TO HAVE MY WEIGHT CHECKED AGAIN. 1045 00:50:45,448 --> 00:50:48,103 I HOPE THE FOCUS STAYS ON FIGURING OUT MY STOMACH PAIN 1046 00:50:48,103 --> 00:50:50,758 AND NOT MY WEIGHT, BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL LIKE 1047 00:50:50,758 --> 00:50:54,103 I'VE HAD THE TIME I NEED TO GET BACK ON TRACK. 1048 00:50:54,103 --> 00:50:57,344 AND IF I HAVEN'T, THEN MY FEAR IS THAT DR. NOW 1049 00:50:57,344 --> 00:51:01,310 WILL TELL ME I'M DONE, AND THAT'LL BE IT FOR ME. 1050 00:51:01,310 --> 00:51:03,310 SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN, 1051 00:51:03,310 --> 00:51:05,965 AND I'M ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED RIGHT NOW. 1052 00:51:10,413 --> 00:51:18,413 ♪♪ 1053 00:51:18,413 --> 00:51:22,241 Destinee: I'M AT DR. NOW'S BECAUSE I HAVE SEVERE STOMACH PAIN. 1054 00:51:22,241 --> 00:51:24,103 BUT I'M WAITING ON HIM TO CALL ME, 1055 00:51:24,103 --> 00:51:26,793 AND I KNOW THEY'RE GOING TO WANT TO DO A WEIGHT CHECK FIRST. 1056 00:51:26,793 --> 00:51:30,620 AND I'M SCARED BECAUSE I WASN'T PLANNING ON COMING HERE TODAY, 1057 00:51:30,620 --> 00:51:32,413 AND I'M NOT READY. 1058 00:51:32,413 --> 00:51:35,103 ♪♪ 1059 00:51:35,103 --> 00:51:37,655 DESTINEE? 1060 00:51:37,655 --> 00:51:41,517 DR. NOW WANTED ME TO LOSE 80 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS, 1061 00:51:41,517 --> 00:51:43,482 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M GETTING CLOSE, 1062 00:51:43,482 --> 00:51:45,586 BUT I NEED SOME MORE TIME. 1063 00:51:45,586 --> 00:51:47,586 AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT THREE MONTHS AGO, 1064 00:51:47,586 --> 00:51:50,172 I WAS AT 644. 1065 00:51:50,172 --> 00:51:54,068 AND IF I HIT MY GOAL, I SHOULD BE AT LEAST DOWN TO 564, 1066 00:51:54,068 --> 00:51:57,379 AND I THINK I'M CLOSE TO THAT. 1067 00:51:57,379 --> 00:52:04,241 ♪♪ 1068 00:52:04,241 --> 00:52:07,379 I DON'T SEE HOW THAT'S ACCURATE. 1069 00:52:07,379 --> 00:52:10,931 I'VE WORKED TOO HARD TO SEE SUCH A LOW LOSS LIKE THAT, 1070 00:52:10,931 --> 00:52:14,379 BUT I DIDN'T COME HERE TO DISCUSS MY PROGRESS. 1071 00:52:14,379 --> 00:52:16,827 I'M HERE TO FIGURE OUT MY STOMACH PAIN, 1072 00:52:16,827 --> 00:52:19,965 AND I HOPE DR. NOW FOCUSES ON THAT 1073 00:52:19,965 --> 00:52:21,724 BECAUSE MY WEIGHT LOSS NEEDS TO WAIT 1074 00:52:21,724 --> 00:52:24,275 UNTIL ANOTHER APPOINTMENT. 1075 00:52:24,275 --> 00:52:28,068 ♪♪ 1076 00:52:28,068 --> 00:52:29,827 -HELLO. -HELLO. 1077 00:52:29,827 --> 00:52:32,000 -HOW ARE Y'ALL DOING? -FINE. 1078 00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:33,482 I'M HERE. 1079 00:52:33,482 --> 00:52:35,655 SO, HOW IS YOUR STOMACH DOING, DESTINEE? 1080 00:52:35,655 --> 00:52:37,103 ANY BETTER SINCE WE TALKED? 1081 00:52:37,103 --> 00:52:38,310 NO, SIR. 1082 00:52:38,310 --> 00:52:40,931 YOU STILL FEEL LIKE YOU'RE RUNNING A FEVER? 1083 00:52:40,931 --> 00:52:42,275 YES, SIR. 1084 00:52:42,275 --> 00:52:44,034 AND I'M FEELING -- I'M FEELING WEAK. 1085 00:52:44,034 --> 00:52:45,758 NO NAUSEA? NO VOMITING? 1086 00:52:45,758 --> 00:52:47,655 NO, SIR. 1087 00:52:47,655 --> 00:52:49,241 OKAY. 1088 00:52:49,241 --> 00:52:52,517 SO, WE NEED TO CHECK YOUR STOMACH, SEE WHAT'S GOING ON. 1089 00:52:52,517 --> 00:52:54,103 CAN I GET YOU ON THE TABLE? 1090 00:52:54,103 --> 00:52:56,620 WE'RE GONNA NEED TO PRAY BEFORE WE TRY TO GET ME UP THERE. 1091 00:52:56,620 --> 00:53:00,068 -WHY? -'CAUSE I'M BIG AS HELL. 1092 00:53:00,068 --> 00:53:02,620 BUT WHEN YOU'RE LAUGHING, DOES STOMACH HURT? 1093 00:53:02,620 --> 00:53:04,275 NO, IT DOESN'T HURT WHEN I LAUGH. 1094 00:53:04,275 --> 00:53:07,413 WELL, THAT'S A VERY GOOD SIGN. THAT'S A VERY GOOD SIGN. 1095 00:53:07,413 --> 00:53:09,034 LET ME GET YOU UP ON THE TABLE 1096 00:53:09,034 --> 00:53:11,068 AND SEE IF WE CAN CHECK YOUR STOMACH. 1097 00:53:11,068 --> 00:53:12,620 OKAY. 1098 00:53:12,620 --> 00:53:14,758 ♪♪ 1099 00:53:14,758 --> 00:53:17,344 FROM WHAT DESTINEE HAS ALREADY DESCRIBED TO ME, 1100 00:53:17,344 --> 00:53:19,551 I DON'T THINK THERE IS ANYTHING SERIOUSLY WRONG 1101 00:53:19,551 --> 00:53:21,034 WITH HER RIGHT NOW. 1102 00:53:21,034 --> 00:53:23,241 AT HER WEIGHT, WE'RE NOT GONNA TAKE ANY CHANCES. 1103 00:53:23,241 --> 00:53:25,689 SO WE WILL MAKE SURE THERE ARE NO ISSUES. 1104 00:53:25,689 --> 00:53:29,344 BUT I'M CONCERNED THAT THE REALITY IS THAT SHE'S DIETING 1105 00:53:29,344 --> 00:53:31,655 FOR A BIT AND THEN BINGEING, 1106 00:53:31,655 --> 00:53:34,896 AND THAT'S A SOURCE OF HER DISCOMFORT AND PAIN RIGHT NOW. 1107 00:53:34,896 --> 00:53:37,655 IT MAY HAVE CAUSED SOME MUSCLE SPASM OR GAS, 1108 00:53:37,655 --> 00:53:40,448 SO THE ONLY PROBLEM I'M REALLY WORRIED ABOUT 1109 00:53:40,448 --> 00:53:46,275 IS THE FACT THAT SHE HAS HARDLY LOST ANY WEIGHT IN THREE MONTHS. 1110 00:53:46,275 --> 00:53:50,137 YOU CAN DO IT. ALL RIGHT. 1111 00:53:50,137 --> 00:53:53,034 LET'S SEE WHAT'S GOING ON HERE. ANY PAIN IN HERE? 1112 00:53:53,034 --> 00:53:56,206 -NO, SIR. -ALL RIGHT. ANY PAIN IN HERE? 1113 00:53:56,206 --> 00:53:58,068 -RIGHT HERE. -RIGHT HERE HURT? 1114 00:53:58,068 --> 00:54:00,000 -YEAH. -OKAY. 1115 00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:01,448 ANY PAIN IN HERE? 1116 00:54:01,448 --> 00:54:02,689 NOT REALLY, RIGHT THERE. 1117 00:54:02,689 --> 00:54:05,896 OKAY, JUST RELAX. RELAX. TAKE A DEEP BREATH. 1118 00:54:05,896 --> 00:54:08,034 ♪♪ 1119 00:54:08,034 --> 00:54:10,827 HOW ABOUT WHEN I LET GO? 1120 00:54:10,827 --> 00:54:12,448 OKAY. THAT'S A GOOD SIGN. 1121 00:54:12,448 --> 00:54:15,965 SO YOU DON'T HAVE WHAT WE CALL REBOUND TENDERNESS IN HERE. 1122 00:54:15,965 --> 00:54:19,344 THIS IS JUST PROBABLY A MUSCULAR PAIN, OKAY? 1123 00:54:19,344 --> 00:54:22,275 -OKAY. -OKAY. SO YOU CAN SIT UP AGAIN. 1124 00:54:22,275 --> 00:54:28,000 ♪♪ 1125 00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:30,896 ALL RIGHT. 1126 00:54:30,896 --> 00:54:32,758 SO THERE'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, 1127 00:54:32,758 --> 00:54:35,000 AND YOU GOT A LITTLE BIT OF WORKOUT IN THE PROCESS. 1128 00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:36,620 [ LAUGHS ] 1129 00:54:36,620 --> 00:54:38,655 SO I'M NOT CONCERNED ABOUT THAT. 1130 00:54:38,655 --> 00:54:41,068 HOWEVER, WHAT I AM CONCERNED ABOUT 1131 00:54:41,068 --> 00:54:43,068 IS THAT YOU MISSED YOUR APPOINTMENT LAST MONTH, 1132 00:54:43,068 --> 00:54:45,896 WHERE YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO HAVE LOST 80 POUNDS. 1133 00:54:45,896 --> 00:54:49,413 BUT INSTEAD, IN THREE MONTHS, YOU ONLY LOST 17. 1134 00:54:49,413 --> 00:54:51,551 SO I'M NOT TOO HAPPY ABOUT THAT. 1135 00:54:51,551 --> 00:54:55,068 YOU'RE STILL NOT TAKING ANY OF THIS VERY SERIOUSLY. 1136 00:54:55,068 --> 00:54:56,551 THIS IS WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO. 1137 00:54:56,551 --> 00:54:59,172 I'M GONNA SET AN APPOINTMENT WITH PSYCHOTHERAPY, 1138 00:54:59,172 --> 00:55:01,241 AND I WANT YOU TO START GOING TO THAT 1139 00:55:01,241 --> 00:55:03,310 SO THEY CAN HELP GIVE YOU SOME TOOLS 1140 00:55:03,310 --> 00:55:06,310 TO TRY TO CONTROL AND COPE WITH YOUR EMOTIONS BETTER. 1141 00:55:06,310 --> 00:55:08,689 AND IF YOU SKIP THAT AND DON'T LOSE 80 POUNDS 1142 00:55:08,689 --> 00:55:11,137 IN THE NEXT TWO MONTHS, THEN THAT WILL BE IT. 1143 00:55:11,137 --> 00:55:12,931 YOU'LL BE DONE WITH THE PROGRAM. 1144 00:55:12,931 --> 00:55:15,448 SO THIS TIME, YOU WAKE UP AND DO THIS. 1145 00:55:15,448 --> 00:55:17,827 -YOU GOT IT? -YES, SIR. 1146 00:55:17,827 --> 00:55:19,172 GOOD. 1147 00:55:19,172 --> 00:55:22,137 ALL RIGHT. YOU CAN GET DOWN IF YOU WANT TO. 1148 00:55:22,137 --> 00:55:24,034 OKAY. OHH. 1149 00:55:24,034 --> 00:55:27,793 ♪♪ 1150 00:55:27,793 --> 00:55:31,379 THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO DO THIS, DESTINEE. DON'T WASTE IT. 1151 00:55:31,379 --> 00:55:32,758 OKAY. 1152 00:55:32,758 --> 00:55:34,344 ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE IN A COUPLE MONTHS. 1153 00:55:34,344 --> 00:55:36,413 -THANK YOU SO MUCH. -MM-HMM. 1154 00:55:36,413 --> 00:55:40,655 ♪♪ 1155 00:55:40,655 --> 00:55:43,448 Dr. Nowzaradan: HOPEFULLY, PSYCHOTHERAPY WILL HAVE SOME SUCCESS 1156 00:55:43,448 --> 00:55:45,931 HELPING DESTINEE GET HER EMOTIONAL EATING 1157 00:55:45,931 --> 00:55:47,310 UNDER CONTROL ENOUGH 1158 00:55:47,310 --> 00:55:49,931 TO START MAKING THE PROGRESS SHE NEEDS. 1159 00:55:49,931 --> 00:55:52,137 BUT THERE IS STILL A BIG DISCONNECT WITH HER 1160 00:55:52,137 --> 00:55:54,344 BETWEEN WHAT SHE THINKS SHE'S WORKING FOR 1161 00:55:54,344 --> 00:55:56,724 AND WHAT SHE IS ACTUALLY WILLING TO DO, 1162 00:55:56,724 --> 00:55:58,793 BECAUSE THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON 1163 00:55:58,793 --> 00:56:01,655 SHE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO PUT FORWARD SOME EFFORT 1164 00:56:01,655 --> 00:56:03,241 FOR A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. 1165 00:56:03,241 --> 00:56:07,206 SO I STILL HAVE THE SAME CONCERN I HAD IN THE BEGINNING 1166 00:56:07,206 --> 00:56:09,310 THAT SHE'S NOT REALLY COMMITTED TO THIS 1167 00:56:09,310 --> 00:56:12,724 AND STILL EXPECTS THE HARD WORK TO BE DONE FOR HER. 1168 00:56:12,724 --> 00:56:16,586 SO IF SHE'S COUNTING ON SURGERY TO BE WHAT DOES THAT FOR HER, 1169 00:56:16,586 --> 00:56:18,689 THEN THAT IS A SETUP FOR FAILURE 1170 00:56:18,689 --> 00:56:21,275 AND THERE IS NO POINT IN MOVING AHEAD. 1171 00:56:21,275 --> 00:56:23,172 BUT IF SHE DOESN'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN, 1172 00:56:23,172 --> 00:56:26,172 THEN SHE NEEDS TO START DOING WHAT SHE NEEDS. 1173 00:56:26,172 --> 00:56:28,965 ♪♪ 1174 00:56:28,965 --> 00:56:31,965 Destinee: I WAS REALLY HOPING THAT DR. NOW WOULD UNDERSTAND 1175 00:56:31,965 --> 00:56:33,551 THAT I WAS ONLY THERE 1176 00:56:33,551 --> 00:56:36,827 BECAUSE I WAS SCARED ABOUT MY STOMACH PAIN. 1177 00:56:36,827 --> 00:56:40,068 BUT AFTER I GOT ON THE SCALE AND SAW MY WEIGHT, 1178 00:56:40,068 --> 00:56:43,344 I KNEW THERE WAS A GOOD CHANCE HE'D WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. 1179 00:56:43,344 --> 00:56:46,793 BUT AT LEAST DR. NOW IS GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE. 1180 00:56:46,793 --> 00:56:54,379 ♪♪ 1181 00:56:54,379 --> 00:56:57,172 RIGHT NOW, I'M HEADED TO MEET THE THERAPIST. 1182 00:56:57,172 --> 00:56:59,137 DR. NOW SAID THAT IT'LL BE A BENEFIT 1183 00:56:59,137 --> 00:57:00,758 TO HELP ME OUT IN THE LONG RUN, 1184 00:57:00,758 --> 00:57:03,724 SO I'M GOING TO THERAPY TODAY TO TRY TO GET SOME HELP 1185 00:57:03,724 --> 00:57:06,206 WITH SOME OF THE ISSUES THAT I'M DEALING WITH. 1186 00:57:06,206 --> 00:57:08,862 ♪♪ 1187 00:57:08,862 --> 00:57:11,482 BUT I DON'T REALLY EXPECT IT TO HELP ME THAT MUCH. 1188 00:57:11,482 --> 00:57:14,275 ♪♪ 1189 00:57:14,275 --> 00:57:18,379 AND I DON'T EVEN REALLY KNOW WHAT TO TALK ABOUT. 1190 00:57:18,379 --> 00:57:22,517 BUT AT LEAST I THINK I'LL BE ABLE TO FEEL BETTER AFTERWARDS. 1191 00:57:22,517 --> 00:57:25,482 BUT WHO KNOWS? 1192 00:57:25,482 --> 00:57:28,896 IT'S NOT THAT EASY TO JUST START TALKING ABOUT YOUR EMOTIONS. 1193 00:57:28,896 --> 00:57:37,000 ♪♪ 1194 00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:38,827 -MS. DESTINEE? -HEY. 1195 00:57:38,827 --> 00:57:40,275 -HI. -HOW YOU DOING, DARLING? 1196 00:57:40,275 --> 00:57:41,862 GOOD. IT'S A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU. 1197 00:57:41,862 --> 00:57:43,413 PLEASURE TO MEET YOU, TOO. 1198 00:57:43,413 --> 00:57:45,689 AND WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, YOU CAN GO RIGHT ON IN 1199 00:57:45,689 --> 00:57:48,586 AND HAVE A SEAT WHEREVER YOU'RE MOST COMFORTABLE. 1200 00:57:48,586 --> 00:57:50,310 OKAY. 1201 00:57:58,482 --> 00:58:01,655 SO, TELL ME A LITTLE BIT ABOUT YOURSELF. 1202 00:58:01,655 --> 00:58:03,413 WHAT WAS YOUR LIFE LIKE GROWING UP? 1203 00:58:03,413 --> 00:58:05,793 OH, LORD. 1204 00:58:05,793 --> 00:58:07,206 DISASTER. 1205 00:58:07,206 --> 00:58:09,310 MY MAMA, SHE GAVE ME AND MY TWO BROTHERS UP... 1206 00:58:09,310 --> 00:58:11,758 OKAY. ...BECAUSE SHE WAS YOUNG 1207 00:58:11,758 --> 00:58:14,172 AND SHE, UM, GOT INTO SOME TROUBLE. 1208 00:58:14,172 --> 00:58:16,448 SO WE HAD TO BE RAISED IN A FOSTER-CARE HOME. 1209 00:58:16,448 --> 00:58:19,655 SO, DESTINEE, WHAT WAS LIFE LIKE FOR YOU GROWING UP 1210 00:58:19,655 --> 00:58:21,379 IN THE FOSTER-CARE SYSTEM? 1211 00:58:21,379 --> 00:58:23,482 LORD. OH, IT WAS REALLY HARD. 1212 00:58:23,482 --> 00:58:25,896 WERE YOU IN THE SAME HOME WITH YOUR SIBLINGS? 1213 00:58:25,896 --> 00:58:27,206 YES, MA'AM. 1214 00:58:27,206 --> 00:58:30,206 -WELL, THAT'S FORTUNATE. -YEAH. 1215 00:58:30,206 --> 00:58:33,517 AND WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP LIKE WITH YOUR SIBLINGS TODAY? 1216 00:58:33,517 --> 00:58:35,827 MY YOUNGER BROTHER, HE ENDED UP PASSING AWAY. 1217 00:58:35,827 --> 00:58:37,241 AND, UM, MY OTHER BROTHER -- 1218 00:58:37,241 --> 00:58:38,896 I DON'T REALLY TALK TO HIM THAT MUCH. 1219 00:58:38,896 --> 00:58:40,620 YOUR YOUNGER BROTHER PASSED AWAY? 1220 00:58:40,620 --> 00:58:42,482 -YES, HE DID. -I'M SORRY. 1221 00:58:42,482 --> 00:58:44,103 YEAH, THANK YOU. 1222 00:58:44,103 --> 00:58:46,379 THAT MUST'VE BEEN A DIFFICULT TIME IN YOUR LIFE. 1223 00:58:46,379 --> 00:58:47,827 YEAH, THAT WAS -- 1224 00:58:47,827 --> 00:58:50,379 LOSING MY BROTHER WAS, LIKE, ONE OF THE WORST THINGS. 1225 00:58:50,379 --> 00:58:52,448 -MY BROTHER DIED IN MY ARMS. -MM-HMM. 1226 00:58:52,448 --> 00:58:54,482 AND SO EVER SINCE THAT DAY -- 1227 00:58:54,482 --> 00:58:56,344 I JUST BASICALLY WANTED TO BE WITH HIM. 1228 00:58:56,344 --> 00:58:58,896 LIKE, I DIDN'T WANT TO EXIST IN A WORLD WITHOUT MY BROTHER. 1229 00:58:58,896 --> 00:59:00,517 I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO LIVE NO MORE, 1230 00:59:00,517 --> 00:59:03,310 SO I HAD TO GO IN THE MENTAL HOSPITAL. 1231 00:59:03,310 --> 00:59:05,103 SO YOU WERE REALLY DEPRESSED. 1232 00:59:05,103 --> 00:59:06,482 I WAS DEPRESSED A LOT. 1233 00:59:06,482 --> 00:59:08,620 AND I'VE -- I'VE ALWAYS BEEN DEPRESSED A LOT 1234 00:59:08,620 --> 00:59:11,586 BECAUSE OF BEING GAY AND BEING TRANSGENDER -- 1235 00:59:11,586 --> 00:59:13,862 YOU KNOW, SOMEBODY THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE 1236 00:59:13,862 --> 00:59:16,620 JUST WOULDN'T THINK WAS NORMAL. 1237 00:59:16,620 --> 00:59:18,655 THAT HAD TO BE VERY DIFFICULT. 1238 00:59:18,655 --> 00:59:19,965 YEAH, IT WAS HARD. 1239 00:59:19,965 --> 00:59:22,620 DESTINEE, CAN YOU DESCRIBE TO ME, 1240 00:59:22,620 --> 00:59:26,034 AT WHAT AGE DID YOU FIRST RECALL 1241 00:59:26,034 --> 00:59:29,137 FEELING THAT YOU WERE NOT IN THE RIGHT BODY? 1242 00:59:29,137 --> 00:59:31,034 FIRST, I REALIZED THAT I WAS GAY. 1243 00:59:31,034 --> 00:59:33,896 BUT I THINK I WAS LIKE 21 WHEN I DECIDED TO DRESS AS A WOMAN, 1244 00:59:33,896 --> 00:59:35,379 TO LIVE MY LIFE AS A WOMAN. 1245 00:59:35,379 --> 00:59:38,275 AND SO WHAT WAS IT LIKE FOR YOU WHEN YOU FINALLY DECIDED 1246 00:59:38,275 --> 00:59:41,586 TO EMBRACE YOUR FEMININITY AND DO THAT? 1247 00:59:41,586 --> 00:59:43,862 IT WAS AMAZING TO BE ABLE TO BE LIKE 1248 00:59:43,862 --> 00:59:45,724 WHAT I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE. 1249 00:59:45,724 --> 00:59:50,241 BUT WITH THAT CAME A LOT OF NONACCEPTANCE. 1250 00:59:50,241 --> 00:59:52,068 LIKE, THE DAY I STARTED DRESSING AS A WOMAN 1251 00:59:52,068 --> 00:59:53,586 AND LIVE MY LIFE AS A WOMAN 1252 00:59:53,586 --> 00:59:55,517 IS WHEN EVERYTHING JUST WENT BAD. 1253 00:59:55,517 --> 00:59:57,517 I STILL HAVE TROUBLE GETTING A GOOD JOB. 1254 00:59:57,517 --> 01:00:00,965 I'M LIKE, "WHAT IF I GO BACK TO BEING A MAN? 1255 01:00:00,965 --> 01:00:03,000 WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'LL MAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE HAPPY." 1256 01:00:03,000 --> 01:00:04,965 DESTINEE, DON'T SAY THAT. 1257 01:00:04,965 --> 01:00:09,344 YOU HAVE TO GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO BE WHO YOU ARE, 1258 01:00:09,344 --> 01:00:11,344 EVEN WHEN OTHERS DON'T APPROVE. 1259 01:00:11,344 --> 01:00:14,827 YOU'RE ON THIS JOURNEY NOW WHERE YOU'RE BECOMING 1260 01:00:14,827 --> 01:00:17,172 MORE OF WHO YOU REALLY ARE. 1261 01:00:17,172 --> 01:00:18,551 YES. 1262 01:00:18,551 --> 01:00:20,379 SO NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS AS YOU MOVE FORWARD, 1263 01:00:20,379 --> 01:00:23,551 YOU CAN'T EVER GO BACK AND RUN AND HIDE. 1264 01:00:23,551 --> 01:00:25,448 YEAH. YEAH, I KNOW THAT. 1265 01:00:25,448 --> 01:00:27,448 MY DREAM IS TO HAVE THE TRANSITION. 1266 01:00:27,448 --> 01:00:28,896 I WANT TO TRANSITION INTO A WOMAN, 1267 01:00:28,896 --> 01:00:30,655 BUT I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO LOSE THE WEIGHT 1268 01:00:30,655 --> 01:00:33,413 AND GET SMALL AND GET LOST. 1269 01:00:33,413 --> 01:00:35,655 'CAUSE I FOUND MYSELF BEING BIG. 1270 01:00:35,655 --> 01:00:37,758 OH, DON'T SAY "GET LOST." 1271 01:00:37,758 --> 01:00:39,862 YOU'RE MORE SIGNIFICANT THAN THAT. 1272 01:00:39,862 --> 01:00:41,482 YEAH. 1273 01:00:41,482 --> 01:00:44,413 YOU'RE MORE SIGNIFICANT THAN THE BODY THAT YOU'RE IN. 1274 01:00:44,413 --> 01:00:45,724 OKAY. THANK YOU. 1275 01:00:45,724 --> 01:00:49,137 SO, I HAVE SOME HOMEWORK FOR YOU, DESTINEE. 1276 01:00:49,137 --> 01:00:52,793 BECAUSE YOU'VE GONE THROUGH TRAUMATIC LOSSES, 1277 01:00:52,793 --> 01:00:56,758 YOU'VE DEVELOPED SOME ISSUES AROUND DEATH. 1278 01:00:56,758 --> 01:00:58,068 MM-HMM. 1279 01:00:58,068 --> 01:01:00,965 AND SO I REALLY WANT YOU TO TAKE SOME TIME OUT 1280 01:01:00,965 --> 01:01:05,620 AND JUST THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU FEEL DEATH LOOKS LIKE. 1281 01:01:05,620 --> 01:01:07,620 OKAY. 1282 01:01:07,620 --> 01:01:09,689 AND THEN I WANT YOU TO ASK YOURSELF, 1283 01:01:09,689 --> 01:01:15,206 "WHO AM I? WHO IS DESTINEE?" 1284 01:01:15,206 --> 01:01:17,689 YEAH. THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION. 1285 01:01:17,689 --> 01:01:19,620 THE TYPE OF WOMAN THAT YOU ARE... 1286 01:01:19,620 --> 01:01:22,413 AND WHAT YOU WANT YOUR LEGACY TO BE. 1287 01:01:22,413 --> 01:01:23,655 YEAH. 1288 01:01:23,655 --> 01:01:25,379 THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE, MS. DESTINEE. 1289 01:01:25,379 --> 01:01:27,724 THANK YOU. I APPRECIATE YOU HAVING ME. 1290 01:01:27,724 --> 01:01:29,793 ANYTIME, ANYTIME. 1291 01:01:29,793 --> 01:01:32,448 ♪♪ 1292 01:01:32,448 --> 01:01:36,103 Destinee: I LIKE LOLA, AND I ENJOY TALKING TO HER. 1293 01:01:36,103 --> 01:01:38,965 I THINK SHE'S REALLY NICE. 1294 01:01:38,965 --> 01:01:42,206 BUT EVERYTHING SHE SAID, IT'S A LOT TO THINK ABOUT. 1295 01:01:42,206 --> 01:01:44,793 AND IF I'M BEING HONEST, I'M JUST NOT SURE 1296 01:01:44,793 --> 01:01:48,275 I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING SHE WANTS ME TO DO. 1297 01:01:48,275 --> 01:01:50,586 BUT I KNOW I NEED TO DO SOMETHING, 1298 01:01:50,586 --> 01:01:52,965 BECAUSE IF I GO BACK TO DR. NOW ONE MORE TIME 1299 01:01:52,965 --> 01:01:56,034 WITHOUT HITTING MY GOAL, THEN THAT'S IT FOR ME. 1300 01:01:56,034 --> 01:01:58,379 SO I'M NOT REALLY SURE WHAT TO DO RIGHT NOW. 1301 01:02:03,551 --> 01:02:10,827 ♪♪ 1302 01:02:10,827 --> 01:02:18,137 ♪♪ 1303 01:02:18,137 --> 01:02:19,793 Destinee: AFTER SEEING LOLA, 1304 01:02:19,793 --> 01:02:22,379 I THOUGHT A LOT ABOUT EVERYTHING, 1305 01:02:22,379 --> 01:02:24,689 ESPECIALLY THE HOMEWORK SHE WANTED ME TO DO 1306 01:02:24,689 --> 01:02:28,551 TO START TO FACE SOME OF MY EMOTIONS -- 1307 01:02:28,551 --> 01:02:32,310 THE BIG ONE BEING MY BROTHER'S PASSING. 1308 01:02:32,310 --> 01:02:35,724 SO WHAT I DECIDED TO DO WAS DRIVE BACK HOME TO LOUISIANA 1309 01:02:35,724 --> 01:02:39,206 AND VISIT HIS GRAVE AND TALK TO HIM SOME. 1310 01:02:39,206 --> 01:02:41,172 BUT I'M NOT GONNA TALK OUT LOUD. 1311 01:02:41,172 --> 01:02:42,793 I'M GONNA DO IT IN MY HEART, 1312 01:02:42,793 --> 01:02:46,275 AND IT'S GONNA JUST BE BETWEEN ME AND HIM. 1313 01:02:46,275 --> 01:02:49,931 I MISS ANTHONY WITH ALL MY HEART, 1314 01:02:49,931 --> 01:02:53,827 SO DOING THIS IS SOMETHING THAT'S VERY HARD FOR ME. 1315 01:02:53,827 --> 01:02:57,172 IT BRINGS UP A LOT OF PAIN AND ALL THAT GUILT OF FEELING 1316 01:02:57,172 --> 01:02:59,620 LIKE I COULD'VE SAVED HIM. 1317 01:02:59,620 --> 01:03:03,034 SO THIS ISN'T EASY AT ALL. 1318 01:03:03,034 --> 01:03:09,896 ♪♪ 1319 01:03:09,896 --> 01:03:16,724 ♪♪ 1320 01:03:24,413 --> 01:03:31,172 ♪♪ 1321 01:03:31,172 --> 01:03:37,896 ♪♪ 1322 01:03:37,896 --> 01:03:42,448 IT'S HARD TO DESCRIBE HOW MUCH I MISS HIM. 1323 01:03:42,448 --> 01:03:44,068 HE WAS ONE OF THE KINDEST 1324 01:03:44,068 --> 01:03:46,896 AND MOST SUPPORTIVE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE. 1325 01:03:46,896 --> 01:03:48,931 AND EVER SINCE I LOST HIM, 1326 01:03:48,931 --> 01:03:51,103 THERE'S BEEN THIS EMPTINESS AND DEPRESSION IN ME 1327 01:03:51,103 --> 01:03:53,931 THAT'S NEVER GONE AWAY. 1328 01:03:53,931 --> 01:03:57,275 I KNOW I'VE USED FOOD TO TRY TO DEAL WITH THAT. 1329 01:03:57,275 --> 01:04:00,758 I JUST MISS HIM SO, SO MUCH. 1330 01:04:00,758 --> 01:04:03,172 IT SUCKS TO NOT HAVE HIM HERE THROUGHOUT, YOU KNOW, 1331 01:04:03,172 --> 01:04:04,896 A LOT OF THINGS THAT I'M GOING THROUGH 1332 01:04:04,896 --> 01:04:07,793 AND A LOT OF THINGS THAT MY FAMILY'S GOING THROUGH. 1333 01:04:07,793 --> 01:04:10,724 HIS LOSS TOOK A TOLL ON ME. 1334 01:04:10,724 --> 01:04:13,206 I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE GRIEF. 1335 01:04:13,206 --> 01:04:15,206 ♪♪ 1336 01:04:15,206 --> 01:04:17,827 BUT I'M GETTING TO A BETTER PLACE. 1337 01:04:17,827 --> 01:04:21,137 BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN THE PAIN OF NOT HAVING HIM IN MY LIFE 1338 01:04:21,137 --> 01:04:23,551 WILL EVER GO AWAY, 1339 01:04:23,551 --> 01:04:28,862 AND I WISH I COULD SOMEHOW SEE HIM ONE LAST TIME. 1340 01:04:28,862 --> 01:04:32,896 HE WAS TAKEN SO ABRUPTLY. 1341 01:04:32,896 --> 01:04:35,724 YOU KNOW, I WISH THAT I COULD JUST GET A HUG. 1342 01:04:35,724 --> 01:04:38,000 YOU KNOW, I WISH THAT I COULD JUST... 1343 01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:47,344 ♪♪ 1344 01:04:47,344 --> 01:04:52,586 LOSING MY BROTHER ANTHONY WAS THE GREATEST PAIN I EVER FELT. 1345 01:04:52,586 --> 01:04:54,896 IF HE HADN'T DIED LIKE HE DID, 1346 01:04:54,896 --> 01:04:58,206 THEN I WOULDN'T HAVE ENDED UP LIKE THIS. 1347 01:04:58,206 --> 01:05:01,379 SO I CAN'T DENY THERE ARE ISSUES I HAVE TO ADDRESS, 1348 01:05:01,379 --> 01:05:05,172 LIKE THE PAIN I HAVE FROM HIS DEATH AND MY EATING. 1349 01:05:05,172 --> 01:05:07,068 I JUST HOPE THIS WAS A STEP 1350 01:05:07,068 --> 01:05:10,344 TOWARDS LETTING SOME OF IT OUT LIKE LOLA WANTED. 1351 01:05:10,344 --> 01:05:15,689 ♪♪ 1352 01:05:15,689 --> 01:05:21,068 ♪♪ 1353 01:05:21,068 --> 01:05:25,137 GOING TO MY BROTHER'S GRAVE WAS REALLY HARD. 1354 01:05:25,137 --> 01:05:29,137 AND I'M STILL A LITTLE EMOTIONAL ABOUT THAT. 1355 01:05:29,137 --> 01:05:31,379 BUT SINCE DOING IT, I'VE BEEN FEELING LIKE 1356 01:05:31,379 --> 01:05:34,379 SOMETHING IN ME OPENED UP. 1357 01:05:34,379 --> 01:05:36,965 IT'S HARD TO EXPLAIN, REALLY, 1358 01:05:36,965 --> 01:05:40,344 BECAUSE IT'S NOT LIKE ANY OF THE PAIN HAS GONE AWAY. 1359 01:05:40,344 --> 01:05:43,655 ♪♪ 1360 01:05:43,655 --> 01:05:47,000 BUT IT'S LIKE I FEEL LIKE THE POSSIBILITY OF THAT PAIN 1361 01:05:47,000 --> 01:05:50,206 NOT BEING THERE AS MUCH IS WHAT CHANGED. 1362 01:05:50,206 --> 01:05:53,551 ♪♪ 1363 01:05:53,551 --> 01:05:57,103 SO IT FEELS LIKE IT WAS A GOOD STEP FOR ME, 1364 01:05:57,103 --> 01:06:01,344 SO I WANT TO KEEP GOING AND DOING MORE. 1365 01:06:01,344 --> 01:06:04,827 BUT I HAVE TO BE ABLE TO DO IT IN A WAY THAT WORKS FOR ME 1366 01:06:04,827 --> 01:06:06,862 AND THAT I'M COMFORTABLE WITH. 1367 01:06:06,862 --> 01:06:12,965 ♪♪ 1368 01:06:12,965 --> 01:06:15,931 ONE OF THE OTHER THINGS LOLA WANTED ME TO DO 1369 01:06:15,931 --> 01:06:17,931 WAS TO GET IN TOUCH WITH MYSELF 1370 01:06:17,931 --> 01:06:21,413 AND WITH WHAT IT MEANS FOR ME TO BE A WOMAN. 1371 01:06:21,413 --> 01:06:25,137 AND PART OF THAT WAS GETTING MORE COMFORTABLE WITH MY BODY, 1372 01:06:25,137 --> 01:06:28,068 BECAUSE ONE OF MY FEARS, IF I LOSE THE WEIGHT, 1373 01:06:28,068 --> 01:06:32,275 IS LOSING MY CURVES AND MY BREASTS. 1374 01:06:32,275 --> 01:06:36,241 SO TO GET MORE IN TOUCH WITH MY BODY AND FEMININITY, 1375 01:06:36,241 --> 01:06:40,103 I DECIDED TO TAKE A BURLESQUE DANCING CLASS. 1376 01:06:40,103 --> 01:06:43,206 IT'S SOMETHING I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO, 1377 01:06:43,206 --> 01:06:46,931 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M ACTIVE ENOUGH TO HANDLE IT NOW. 1378 01:06:46,931 --> 01:06:50,413 SO I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT DOING THIS. 1379 01:06:50,413 --> 01:06:52,103 I JUST HOPE I CAN KEEP UP 1380 01:06:52,103 --> 01:06:55,793 AND THAT I DON'T GET WINDED TOO QUICK. 1381 01:06:55,793 --> 01:06:58,034 -HI! -HELLO. 1382 01:06:58,034 --> 01:07:00,344 GET COMFORTABLE. MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME. 1383 01:07:04,137 --> 01:07:05,655 -HEY! -HEY. 1384 01:07:05,655 --> 01:07:07,965 -HI! -SO GLAD YOU ALL ARE HERE. 1385 01:07:07,965 --> 01:07:11,137 SO, BURLESQUE IS, ESSENTIALLY, THE ART OF THE TEASE. 1386 01:07:11,137 --> 01:07:16,103 SO WE ARE GOING TO BE DOING A LITTLE BIT OF TEASING TODAY. 1387 01:07:16,103 --> 01:07:19,103 GET UP NOW. 1388 01:07:19,103 --> 01:07:21,034 WE'RE JUST GONNA DO A LITTLE FOLLOW-ALONG. 1389 01:07:21,034 --> 01:07:22,965 DOWN. 1390 01:07:22,965 --> 01:07:26,379 AND WE'RE GONNA GO UP, AND WE'RE GONNA GO FORWARD. 1391 01:07:26,379 --> 01:07:30,724 SO POINT YOUR TOES FORWARD AND ROLL ON UP, OKAY? 1392 01:07:30,724 --> 01:07:33,413 Destinee: I'M FEELING REALLY GOOD. 1393 01:07:33,413 --> 01:07:37,620 I DO FEEL LIKE A CONFIDENT AND SEXY WOMAN RIGHT NOW, 1394 01:07:37,620 --> 01:07:40,931 SO I'M GONNA DEFINITELY KEEP COMING TO THIS. 1395 01:07:40,931 --> 01:07:44,206 FOR SO LONG, I HAD TO HIDE WHO I WAS. 1396 01:07:44,206 --> 01:07:46,758 AND I DON'T FEEL LIKE I'VE EVER TAKEN THE TIME 1397 01:07:46,758 --> 01:07:51,275 TO TRULY EXPLORE BEING COMFORTABLE WITH WHO I AM. 1398 01:07:51,275 --> 01:07:54,275 THERE'S A LOT OF FEAR AROUND DOING IT. 1399 01:07:54,275 --> 01:07:56,827 IT'S NEVER GONNA BE EASY TO BREAK OUT OF THAT. 1400 01:07:56,827 --> 01:08:00,241 BUT BEING HERE TODAY FEELS LIKE A GOOD STEP FOR ME, 1401 01:08:00,241 --> 01:08:03,862 AND IT'S ONE OF THE REASONS I WANTED TO BE HERE IN HOUSTON -- 1402 01:08:03,862 --> 01:08:05,758 TO HAVE OPPORTUNITY AND FIND GROUPS 1403 01:08:05,758 --> 01:08:08,448 THAT WILL ACCEPT ME LIKE THIS. 1404 01:08:08,448 --> 01:08:11,965 BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE THAT OPTION IN A SMALL CITY, 1405 01:08:11,965 --> 01:08:14,275 SO I'M REALLY GLAD I'M DOING THIS, 1406 01:08:14,275 --> 01:08:16,517 AND I THINK ALL OF THIS IS HELPING ME. 1407 01:08:16,517 --> 01:08:18,724 BUT MY NEXT APPOINTMENT IS IN TWO WEEKS, 1408 01:08:18,724 --> 01:08:20,103 AND I'LL FIND OUT THEN 1409 01:08:20,103 --> 01:08:22,344 WHETHER I'M APPROVED FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1410 01:08:22,344 --> 01:08:25,758 OH, YEAH! 1411 01:08:25,758 --> 01:08:33,206 ♪♪ 1412 01:08:33,206 --> 01:08:36,551 I'M HEADED TO MY NEXT APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW. 1413 01:08:36,551 --> 01:08:39,724 SANTANA SAID SHE'D COME WITH ME FOR SUPPORT. 1414 01:08:39,724 --> 01:08:42,862 ONE OF THE TWO THINGS IS GONNA HAPPEN AT THIS APPOINTMENT. 1415 01:08:42,862 --> 01:08:46,724 I'M EITHER GONNA HIT MY GOAL AND GET APPROVED, 1416 01:08:46,724 --> 01:08:50,206 OR I'M NOT, AND DR. NOW IS GONNA TELL ME 1417 01:08:50,206 --> 01:08:52,655 I'M COMPLETELY DONE WITH HIS PROGRAM. 1418 01:08:52,655 --> 01:08:54,758 ♪♪ 1419 01:08:54,758 --> 01:08:58,103 SO HOW DO I BE ANYTHING BUT EXTREMELY NERVOUS, 1420 01:08:58,103 --> 01:09:02,310 WITH PRETTY MUCH MY WHOLE LIFE RIDING ON IT? 1421 01:09:02,310 --> 01:09:04,275 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO DO EVERYTHING I CAN 1422 01:09:04,275 --> 01:09:08,206 THESE PAST TWO MONTHS, FROM DOING THE DIET 1423 01:09:08,206 --> 01:09:10,206 TO EXERCISING 1424 01:09:10,206 --> 01:09:13,379 TO TRYING TO DEAL WITH SOME OF MY EMOTIONS. 1425 01:09:13,379 --> 01:09:15,275 SO I'M PRAYING IT'S ALL GOOD ENOUGH 1426 01:09:15,275 --> 01:09:17,379 TO GET ME TO WHERE I NEED. 1427 01:09:17,379 --> 01:09:19,344 ♪♪ 1428 01:09:19,344 --> 01:09:22,931 DESTINEE? 1429 01:09:22,931 --> 01:09:27,344 BECAUSE IT'S SO IMPORTANT I GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY TODAY. 1430 01:09:27,344 --> 01:09:32,034 IF I DON'T, I'M GONNA END UP EATING MYSELF TO DEATH. 1431 01:09:32,034 --> 01:09:33,655 AND THAT CAN'T BE HOW IT ALL ENDS FOR ME. 1432 01:09:41,379 --> 01:09:49,172 ♪♪ 1433 01:09:49,172 --> 01:09:51,275 Destinee: ME AND SANTANA ARE AT DR. NOW'S 1434 01:09:51,275 --> 01:09:54,000 TO FIND OUT IF I GOT TO MY GOAL 1435 01:09:54,000 --> 01:09:57,068 AND IF I'M GETTING APPROVED FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, 1436 01:09:57,068 --> 01:10:01,413 SO THAT MEANS I HAVE TO BE DOWN BELOW 547 IF I HIT MY GOAL. 1437 01:10:01,413 --> 01:10:07,724 ♪♪ 1438 01:10:07,724 --> 01:10:11,793 THAT'S MORE THAN I'VE LOST SO FAR COMBINED, I THINK. 1439 01:10:11,793 --> 01:10:14,000 BUT IT'S STILL NOT MY GOAL. 1440 01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:16,517 SO I'M REALLY, REALLY SCARED 1441 01:10:16,517 --> 01:10:19,275 BECAUSE I DON'T WANT THIS TO BE IT FOR ME. 1442 01:10:19,275 --> 01:10:23,034 ♪♪ 1443 01:10:23,034 --> 01:10:25,068 -HELLO. -HELLO. 1444 01:10:25,068 --> 01:10:27,793 -HOW YOU DOING? -I'M DOING GOOD, AND YOU? 1445 01:10:27,793 --> 01:10:30,379 I'M DOING ALL RIGHT. WHO'S THE FRIEND? 1446 01:10:30,379 --> 01:10:32,310 -THIS IS MY FRIEND SANTANA. -HOW YOU DOING? 1447 01:10:32,310 --> 01:10:33,655 I'M FINE. AND YOURSELF? 1448 01:10:33,655 --> 01:10:35,620 I'M VERY GOOD, THANK YOU. ALL RIGHT. 1449 01:10:35,620 --> 01:10:39,793 SO, DESTINEE, YOU'RE DOWN TO 565 TODAY. 1450 01:10:39,793 --> 01:10:42,724 SO YOU LOST 62 POUNDS OVER THE LAST TWO MONTHS, 1451 01:10:42,724 --> 01:10:46,344 TO BRING YOUR WEIGHT-LOSS TOTAL TO 103 POUNDS 1452 01:10:46,344 --> 01:10:48,241 SINCE YOU STARTED EIGHT MONTHS AGO. 1453 01:10:48,241 --> 01:10:50,379 THAT SOUND CORRECT?YES, SIR. 1454 01:10:50,379 --> 01:10:53,310 WELL, YOU DIDN'T HIT YOUR GOAL, BUT I THINK YOU'VE SHOWN ME 1455 01:10:53,310 --> 01:10:56,344 YOU'RE NOT GIVING UP AND THAT YOU'RE WORKING AT THIS. 1456 01:10:56,344 --> 01:10:59,172 SO AT THIS POINT, I THINK WE'RE GONNA GO AHEAD 1457 01:10:59,172 --> 01:11:02,551 AND APPROVE YOU FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1458 01:11:02,551 --> 01:11:04,689 -ARE YOU SERIOUS? -YES. 1459 01:11:04,689 --> 01:11:06,103 -ALL RIGHT. -NO. 1460 01:11:06,103 --> 01:11:08,344 -YEAH. -ARE YOU SERIOUS? 1461 01:11:08,344 --> 01:11:10,896 YES. OKAY? 1462 01:11:10,896 --> 01:11:13,310 [ CRYING ] 1463 01:11:13,310 --> 01:11:15,586 I'M SORRY, Y'ALL. 1464 01:11:15,586 --> 01:11:18,241 -ARE YOU SERIOUS? -YES. 1465 01:11:18,241 --> 01:11:22,379 BUT...THERE IS A CERTAIN CONDITION WE HAVE TO MEET, OKAY? 1466 01:11:22,379 --> 01:11:23,862 OKAY. 1467 01:11:23,862 --> 01:11:25,655 BECAUSE IT'S TAKEN YOU A WHILE TO GET TO THIS POINT, 1468 01:11:25,655 --> 01:11:28,310 I'M SCHEDULING YOUR SURGERY FOR TWO MONTHS FROM NOW. 1469 01:11:28,310 --> 01:11:32,000 AND I WANT YOU TO LOSE AT LEAST ANOTHER 60 POUNDS BY THEN 1470 01:11:32,000 --> 01:11:34,896 AND SHOW ME THE RECENT PROGRESS IS NOT TEMPORARY. 1471 01:11:34,896 --> 01:11:36,620 -OKAY? -OKAY. 1472 01:11:36,620 --> 01:11:39,896 BUT IF YOU DON'T LOSE WEIGHT, WE'RE NOT GONNA DO YOUR SURGERY. 1473 01:11:39,896 --> 01:11:41,275 -OKAY. -WE'RE GONNA CANCEL IT, OKAY? 1474 01:11:41,275 --> 01:11:42,620 OKAY. YES, SIR. 1475 01:11:42,620 --> 01:11:45,241 AND THEN IT'S GONNA BE ALSO VERY IMPORTANT 1476 01:11:45,241 --> 01:11:47,137 YOU KEEP GOING TO PSYCHOTHERAPY... 1477 01:11:47,137 --> 01:11:48,310 OKAY. 1478 01:11:48,310 --> 01:11:50,310 ...BECAUSE YOU HAVE A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES 1479 01:11:50,310 --> 01:11:52,724 THAT ARE GOING TO BE VERY IMPORTANT TO CONTINUE 1480 01:11:52,724 --> 01:11:56,034 WORKING ON TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN THE LONG RUN. 1481 01:11:56,034 --> 01:11:58,724 ARE YOU GONNA DO THAT?YES, SIR. I WILL. 1482 01:11:58,724 --> 01:12:01,137 ALL RIGHT. SUPER. WELL, KEEP UP THE HARD WORK. 1483 01:12:01,137 --> 01:12:02,620 YES, SIR. I WILL. 1484 01:12:02,620 --> 01:12:04,379 AND MAKE SURE TO KEEP LOSING. 1485 01:12:04,379 --> 01:12:06,241 AND IF YOU DO, WE'LL MOVE AHEAD 1486 01:12:06,241 --> 01:12:08,482 WITH YOUR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY IN TWO MONTHS. 1487 01:12:08,482 --> 01:12:10,689 I'M SPEECHLESS RIGHT NOW. 1488 01:12:10,689 --> 01:12:11,896 -ALL RIGHT. -OH, LORD. 1489 01:12:11,896 --> 01:12:14,862 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. 1490 01:12:14,862 --> 01:12:17,206 WELL, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO WORK FOR IT. 1491 01:12:17,206 --> 01:12:18,310 -OKAY? -I AM. 1492 01:12:18,310 --> 01:12:20,517 ALL RIGHT. ANY QUESTION? 1493 01:12:20,517 --> 01:12:22,551 CAN I JUST GIVE YOU A HUG? 1494 01:12:22,551 --> 01:12:24,758 SURE. OKAY. 1495 01:12:24,758 --> 01:12:26,586 -THANK YOU SO MUCH. -YOU'RE WELCOME. 1496 01:12:26,586 --> 01:12:28,068 THANK YOU. I APPRECIATE IT. 1497 01:12:28,068 --> 01:12:31,172 ALL RIGHT. YOU'RE WELCOME. I'LL SEE YOU SOON. 1498 01:12:31,172 --> 01:12:33,206 THANK YOU SO MUCH. HAVE A GOOD DAY. 1499 01:12:33,206 --> 01:12:35,517 YOU'RE WELCOME. ALL RIGHT. YOU TOO. 1500 01:12:35,517 --> 01:12:39,586 ♪♪ 1501 01:12:39,586 --> 01:12:42,000 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M HAPPY TO SEE DESTINEE'S WORKING HARDER 1502 01:12:42,000 --> 01:12:44,482 AND THAT HER PROGRESS IS STARTING TO IMPROVE. 1503 01:12:44,482 --> 01:12:47,620 EVEN THOUGH SHE DIDN'T HIT HER GOAL, LOSING WHAT SHE DID 1504 01:12:47,620 --> 01:12:50,517 SHOWS SHE'S PICKING UP THE PACE WITH HER WEIGHT LOSS 1505 01:12:50,517 --> 01:12:53,275 AND APPLYING HERSELF MORE LIKE SHE NEEDS. 1506 01:12:53,275 --> 01:12:56,758 AND A LOT OF THAT HAS TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT SHE'S TAKEN A STEP 1507 01:12:56,758 --> 01:13:00,620 TOWARDS STARTING TO DEAL WITH SOME OF HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES. 1508 01:13:00,620 --> 01:13:02,758 WE NEED TO MAKE SURE TO STICK WITH THAT 1509 01:13:02,758 --> 01:13:06,068 IF SHE'S GONNA HAVE ANY CHANCE TO MAINTAIN HER PROGRESS 1510 01:13:06,068 --> 01:13:08,551 AND KEEPING THE WEIGHT OFF IN THE LONG RUN. 1511 01:13:08,551 --> 01:13:11,379 ♪♪ 1512 01:13:11,379 --> 01:13:13,758 Destinee: I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF 1513 01:13:13,758 --> 01:13:16,344 BECAUSE I DIDN'T JUST WORK HARD THISTIME -- 1514 01:13:16,344 --> 01:13:18,931 I'VE WORKED HARD THIS ENTIRE TIME. 1515 01:13:18,931 --> 01:13:23,103 AND I FINALLY FEEL THAT WAS RECOGNIZED TODAY. 1516 01:13:23,103 --> 01:13:25,310 THIS MAKES ME FEEL REALLY GOOD. 1517 01:13:25,310 --> 01:13:27,655 SO EVEN IF I HAVE TO WAIT TWO MORE MONTHS 1518 01:13:27,655 --> 01:13:29,310 AND LOSE MORE WEIGHT TO GET IT, 1519 01:13:29,310 --> 01:13:32,931 I KNOW I CAN, BECAUSE I'VE MADE IT THIS FAR. 1520 01:13:32,931 --> 01:13:35,103 SO I HAVE NO DOUBT I'M GONNA DO THIS 1521 01:13:35,103 --> 01:13:37,137 AND WHEN I SHOW UP FOR MY SURGERY 1522 01:13:37,137 --> 01:13:39,379 THAT I'M GONNA BE WHERE I NEED. 1523 01:13:39,379 --> 01:13:44,724 ♪♪ 1524 01:13:44,724 --> 01:13:50,103 ♪♪ 1525 01:13:50,103 --> 01:13:51,724 I'M HERE AT THE HOSPITAL 1526 01:13:51,724 --> 01:13:54,689 FOR WHAT I'M HOPING IS THE DAY OF MY SURGERY. 1527 01:13:54,689 --> 01:13:56,827 BUT I HAVE TO GET MY WEIGHT CHECKED FIRST TO SEE 1528 01:13:56,827 --> 01:13:59,482 IF I HIT THE GOAL DR. NOW GAVE ME, 1529 01:13:59,482 --> 01:14:02,862 SO MY NERVES ARE ON EDGE, 1530 01:14:02,862 --> 01:14:07,275 AND I'M JUST HOPING I MADE IT TO WHERE I NEED. 1531 01:14:07,275 --> 01:14:09,379 BUT OVER THESE PAST TWO MONTHS, 1532 01:14:09,379 --> 01:14:13,379 I'VE NOT ONLY WORKED TO STICK TO MY DIET AND EXERCISES, 1533 01:14:13,379 --> 01:14:16,103 BUT I'VE CONTINUED TRYING TO FACE ALL THE THINGS 1534 01:14:16,103 --> 01:14:19,103 I'M SUPPOSED TO BE WRESTLING WITH. 1535 01:14:19,103 --> 01:14:21,689 AND I'M HOPING IT'S CONTINUED TO PAY OFF TODAY 1536 01:14:21,689 --> 01:14:23,310 WITH WHAT I SEE ON THE SCALE. 1537 01:14:23,310 --> 01:14:27,413 ♪♪ 1538 01:14:27,413 --> 01:14:29,344 I SURE CAN. 1539 01:14:29,344 --> 01:14:32,413 ♪♪ 1540 01:14:32,413 --> 01:14:34,586 AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT TWO MONTHS AGO, 1541 01:14:34,586 --> 01:14:36,620 I WAS DOWN TO 565, 1542 01:14:36,620 --> 01:14:40,896 AND DR. NOW WANTED ME TO LOSE ANOTHER 60 POUNDS. 1543 01:14:40,896 --> 01:14:44,413 SO I NEED TO AT LEAST BE DOWN TO 505 TODAY, 1544 01:14:44,413 --> 01:14:47,206 BECAUSE I HAVE TO GET MY SURGERY. 1545 01:14:47,206 --> 01:14:53,172 ♪♪ 1546 01:14:53,172 --> 01:14:56,137 OH, THANK GOODNESS. 1547 01:14:56,137 --> 01:14:58,655 I LOST ONE MORE POUND THAN LAST TIME. 1548 01:14:58,655 --> 01:15:06,275 ♪♪ 1549 01:15:06,275 --> 01:15:09,896 BUT ALL THAT MATTERS IS THAT I HIT MY GOAL. 1550 01:15:09,896 --> 01:15:12,482 SO I SHOULD BE GETTING WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1551 01:15:12,482 --> 01:15:15,137 ♪♪ 1552 01:15:15,137 --> 01:15:18,758 AND I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF FOR HOW FAR I'VE COME. 1553 01:15:18,758 --> 01:15:22,862 AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR DR. NOW TO FIND OUT. 1554 01:15:22,862 --> 01:15:24,827 Woman: LAY BACK FOR ME, PLEASE. 1555 01:15:24,827 --> 01:15:27,034 ALL RIGHT. 1556 01:15:27,034 --> 01:15:31,931 ♪♪ 1557 01:15:31,931 --> 01:15:34,379 -HI, DESTINEE. -HEY, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1558 01:15:34,379 --> 01:15:37,034 YOU HIT YOUR WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL. 1559 01:15:37,034 --> 01:15:40,000 -YES, SIR. -ALL RIGHT. 1560 01:15:40,000 --> 01:15:42,344 SO, ARE YOU READY FOR YOUR BIG DAY? 1561 01:15:42,344 --> 01:15:43,586 YES, SIR. 1562 01:15:43,586 --> 01:15:46,000 SO, OUR PLAN IS TO DO SLEEVE GASTRECTOMY. 1563 01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:48,655 SO THAT'S GONNA HELP YOU A LOT TO LOSE WEIGHT. 1564 01:15:48,655 --> 01:15:50,482 -OKAY. -AND SOME OF THE TESTS SHOW 1565 01:15:50,482 --> 01:15:52,793 THERE MAY BE AN ISSUE WITH YOUR APPENDIX, 1566 01:15:52,793 --> 01:15:54,931 SO WE'RE GONNA TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR APPENDIX. 1567 01:15:54,931 --> 01:15:56,827 IF THERE IS ANY PROBLEM, WE'RE GONNA TAKE IT OUT. 1568 01:15:56,827 --> 01:15:57,965 OKAY? YES, SIR. 1569 01:15:57,965 --> 01:15:59,655 -ALL RIGHT. -I HAD A QUESTION. 1570 01:15:59,655 --> 01:16:01,068 YEAH. 1571 01:16:01,068 --> 01:16:04,103 IF YOU DO, AM I ABLE TO KEEP IT IN A JAR AS A MEMENTO? 1572 01:16:04,103 --> 01:16:07,931 NO, YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO KEEP IT BECAUSE THERE'S A FEDERAL LAW 1573 01:16:07,931 --> 01:16:10,310 THAT ANYTHING COMES OUT OF A BODY 1574 01:16:10,310 --> 01:16:14,034 CANNOT BE RETURNED TO PATIENT OR ANYBODY. 1575 01:16:14,034 --> 01:16:17,206 EVEN WHEN WE TAKE A BULLET, THE PATIENT CANNOT HAVE THE BULLET. 1576 01:16:17,206 --> 01:16:19,379 WELL, THEY TAKE A BABY OUT. 1577 01:16:19,379 --> 01:16:22,137 A BABY IS DIFFERENT. 1578 01:16:22,137 --> 01:16:24,482 SO WE'LL TAKE A PICTURE FOR YOU. 1579 01:16:24,482 --> 01:16:26,000 -OKAY. -GIVE YOU A PICTURE. 1580 01:16:26,000 --> 01:16:27,827 ALL RIGHT. WE'LL GET YOU FIXED UP. 1581 01:16:27,827 --> 01:16:30,000 -THANK YOU. -MM-HMM. 1582 01:16:30,000 --> 01:16:37,379 ♪♪ 1583 01:16:37,379 --> 01:16:40,448 I'M GETTING A LITTLE NERVOUS NOW THAT I'M GOING IN, 1584 01:16:40,448 --> 01:16:42,862 BUT I'M STILL MOSTLY EXCITED. 1585 01:16:42,862 --> 01:16:45,344 THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT STEP FOR ME 1586 01:16:45,344 --> 01:16:48,896 BECAUSE IT'S GONNA HELP ME LOSE A LOT MORE WEIGHT. 1587 01:16:48,896 --> 01:16:51,172 I'M JUST LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEW DESTINEE 1588 01:16:51,172 --> 01:16:52,655 AT THE END OF ALL THIS. 1589 01:16:52,655 --> 01:16:54,965 -ALL RIGHT. COME ON OVER. -OKAY. 1590 01:16:54,965 --> 01:16:58,344 -THERE WE GO. HOW YOU DOING? -I'M FABULOUS. 1591 01:16:58,344 --> 01:17:02,310 THIS IS GONNA HELP CREATE A NEW ME, AND I CAN'T WAIT. 1592 01:17:02,310 --> 01:17:06,793 ♪♪ 1593 01:17:06,793 --> 01:17:08,517 Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY WE ARE ATTEMPTING TO DO 1594 01:17:08,517 --> 01:17:11,310 A GASTRIC SLEEVE PROCEDURE ON DESTINEE. 1595 01:17:11,310 --> 01:17:13,344 UP TO THIS POINT, IT'S BEEN A BIG STRUGGLE 1596 01:17:13,344 --> 01:17:14,931 FOR HER TO LOSE WEIGHT. 1597 01:17:14,931 --> 01:17:17,655 SO THIS SURGERY WILL HELP HER A GREAT DEAL. 1598 01:17:21,103 --> 01:17:24,241 ALL RIGHT. ROOM LIGHT OFF. 1599 01:17:24,241 --> 01:17:29,068 BECAUSE WHAT THIS OPERATION DOES IS REDUCE THE STOMACH BY 90%, 1600 01:17:29,068 --> 01:17:33,344 LEAVING A SMALL, NARROW TUBE THAT LOOKS SIMILAR TO A SLEEVE. 1601 01:17:33,344 --> 01:17:37,310 SO THE PATIENT'S FOOD INTAKE IS PHYSICALLY LIMITED, 1602 01:17:37,310 --> 01:17:39,655 AND THE PATIENT IS LESS HUNGRY. 1603 01:17:39,655 --> 01:17:45,034 ♪♪ 1604 01:17:45,034 --> 01:17:47,344 SO THIS OPERATION WILL GIVE THEM 1605 01:17:47,344 --> 01:17:50,931 AN OPPORTUNITY TO LOSE EVEN MORE WEIGHT. 1606 01:17:50,931 --> 01:17:52,482 SO THIS SURGERY WILL BE 1607 01:17:52,482 --> 01:17:55,689 A VERY IMPORTANT TOOL FOR HER ONCE WE FINISH. 1608 01:17:55,689 --> 01:17:57,379 BUT IN ADDITION TO THAT PROCEDURE, 1609 01:17:57,379 --> 01:18:00,586 WE MAY ALSO NEED TO REMOVE HER APPENDIX. 1610 01:18:00,586 --> 01:18:04,068 HER TESTS HAVE SHOWN SHE MAY HAVE SOME ISSUES WITH IT. 1611 01:18:04,068 --> 01:18:06,103 AND IF THAT TURNS OUT TO BE THE CASE, 1612 01:18:06,103 --> 01:18:07,655 WE WILL NEED TO REMOVE IT 1613 01:18:07,655 --> 01:18:10,000 TO PREVENT IT FROM GETTING ANY WORSE 1614 01:18:10,000 --> 01:18:12,448 AND BECOMING LIFE-THREATENING FOR HER. 1615 01:18:12,448 --> 01:18:14,482 BECAUSE ANY LITTLE ISSUE COULD EASILY 1616 01:18:14,482 --> 01:18:16,586 PUSH HER BODY OVER THE EDGE 1617 01:18:16,586 --> 01:18:18,724 AND END UP BEING TOO MUCH FOR HER TO HANDLE, 1618 01:18:18,724 --> 01:18:20,551 EVEN WITH SURGERY, 1619 01:18:20,551 --> 01:18:23,931 BECAUSE DESTINEE'S STILL AROUND 500 POUNDS. 1620 01:18:23,931 --> 01:18:28,172 AND ANY OPERATION ON A PERSON THAT SIZE IS VERY HIGH-RISK. 1621 01:18:28,172 --> 01:18:30,517 SO IF THERE ARE ANY CONCERNS WE HAVE, 1622 01:18:30,517 --> 01:18:33,034 WE MAY HAVE TO END THE SURGERY EARLIER 1623 01:18:33,034 --> 01:18:35,241 TO PREVENT A LIFE-THREATENING SITUATION 1624 01:18:35,241 --> 01:18:37,793 FROM DEVELOPING WITH HER. 1625 01:18:37,793 --> 01:18:40,517 BUT HOPEFULLY, THAT WON'T BE THE CASE TODAY. 1626 01:18:44,034 --> 01:18:46,103 [ MONITOR BEEPING ] 1627 01:19:02,896 --> 01:19:10,000 ♪♪ 1628 01:19:10,000 --> 01:19:13,068 ALL RIGHT. TURN THE ROOM LIGHT ON. 1629 01:19:13,068 --> 01:19:17,620 ♪♪ 1630 01:19:17,620 --> 01:19:20,724 OKAY. ALL FINISHED. 1631 01:19:20,724 --> 01:19:23,931 DESTINEE'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL. 1632 01:19:23,931 --> 01:19:27,206 WE COMPLETED HER GASTRIC SLEEVE WITHOUT ANY ISSUE. 1633 01:19:27,206 --> 01:19:30,068 AND LUCKILY, HER APPENDIX IS STILL HEALTHY ENOUGH 1634 01:19:30,068 --> 01:19:32,655 TO WHERE WE DIDN'T NEED TO REMOVE IT. 1635 01:19:32,655 --> 01:19:34,931 SO WE'RE GONNA GET HER TO RECOVERY ROOM NOW. 1636 01:19:34,931 --> 01:19:37,655 AND THEN WE'LL GET HER HOME IN A FEW DAYS, 1637 01:19:37,655 --> 01:19:41,724 BUT DESTINEE WILL NEED TO BE ON A LIQUID DIET FOR ABOUT A MONTH. 1638 01:19:41,724 --> 01:19:45,482 AND IN THAT TIME, SHE SHOULD LOSE ANOTHER 35 POUNDS. 1639 01:19:45,482 --> 01:19:48,551 AND THEN SHE SHOULD LOSE AT LEAST 25 POUNDS A MONTH 1640 01:19:48,551 --> 01:19:51,137 UNTIL SHE GETS CLOSE TO HER TARGET. 1641 01:19:51,137 --> 01:19:53,413 BUT THE ONLY WAY SHE'S GOING TO HAVE A CHANCE 1642 01:19:53,413 --> 01:19:55,344 AT STAYING ON TRACK LONG-TERM 1643 01:19:55,344 --> 01:19:58,758 IS IF WE MAKE SURE SHE KEEPS GOING TO PSYCHOTHERAPY 1644 01:19:58,758 --> 01:20:01,517 AND WORKING ON HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES. 1645 01:20:01,517 --> 01:20:04,275 IF SHE DOESN'T, IT WILL ONLY TAKE ONE HARD MOMENT 1646 01:20:04,275 --> 01:20:07,172 TO SEND HER RIGHT BACK TO USING FOOD TO COPE. 1647 01:20:07,172 --> 01:20:09,413 AND IF SHE DOES THAT, SHE CAN SLOWLY STRETCH 1648 01:20:09,413 --> 01:20:10,862 HER STOMACH BACK OUT. 1649 01:20:10,862 --> 01:20:13,413 SO THIS SURGERY IS A VERY IMPORTANT 1650 01:20:13,413 --> 01:20:15,275 AND HELPFUL TOOL FOR HER, 1651 01:20:15,275 --> 01:20:18,275 BUT THE MAIN BENEFIT IS THAT IT SUPPRESSES 1652 01:20:18,275 --> 01:20:20,275 HER PHYSICAL DRIVE TO EAT 1653 01:20:20,275 --> 01:20:23,413 SO SHE CAN FOCUS ON DEALING WITH HER EMOTIONAL DRIVE 1654 01:20:23,413 --> 01:20:25,344 TO PATHOLOGICALLY EAT. 1655 01:20:25,344 --> 01:20:26,551 BUT IF SHE DOESN'T DO THAT, 1656 01:20:26,551 --> 01:20:29,758 THIS SURGERY WILL INEVITABLY FAIL, 1657 01:20:29,758 --> 01:20:31,413 AND SHE WILL END UP RIGHT BACK WHERE SHE STARTED. 1658 01:20:37,793 --> 01:20:45,241 ♪♪ 1659 01:20:45,241 --> 01:20:52,655 ♪♪ 1660 01:20:52,655 --> 01:20:55,068 Destinee: I'M BACK IN LOUISIANA TODAY TO SEE MY FAMILY, 1661 01:20:55,068 --> 01:20:57,000 SINCE I'VE MISSED THEM, 1662 01:20:57,000 --> 01:20:59,172 AND TO SHOW THEM HOW WELL I'M DOING. 1663 01:20:59,172 --> 01:21:01,896 ♪♪ 1664 01:21:01,896 --> 01:21:04,103 BUT I'M MEETING MY SISTER AT THIS NAIL SALON 1665 01:21:04,103 --> 01:21:07,586 TO REWARD MYSELF FOR ALL MY HARD WORK. 1666 01:21:07,586 --> 01:21:09,931 THE LADIES WHO WORK HERE ARE MY FRIENDS, 1667 01:21:09,931 --> 01:21:11,241 AND THEY HAVEN'T SEEN ME 1668 01:21:11,241 --> 01:21:14,000 SINCE BEFORE I STARTED MY WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY. 1669 01:21:14,000 --> 01:21:16,793 SO IT'LL BE FUN SEEING EVERYONE'S REACTION, 1670 01:21:16,793 --> 01:21:19,275 BECAUSE I'VE COME A LONG WAY. 1671 01:21:19,275 --> 01:21:21,000 SISSY! 1672 01:21:21,000 --> 01:21:24,620 MISSED YOU. 1673 01:21:24,620 --> 01:21:26,241 YOU LOOK GOOD. 1674 01:21:26,241 --> 01:21:27,827 GIRL... 1675 01:21:27,827 --> 01:21:30,758 -FEELING IT, FEELING IT. -I AM. 1676 01:21:30,758 --> 01:21:32,551 Destinee: I'M FINALLY IN THE 400s, 1677 01:21:32,551 --> 01:21:35,310 AND THAT'S BEEN REALLY EXCITING. 1678 01:21:35,310 --> 01:21:37,172 I'VE LOST ANOTHER 35 POUNDS 1679 01:21:37,172 --> 01:21:40,931 BEING ON THAT LIQUID DIET FOR THE LAST MONTH. 1680 01:21:40,931 --> 01:21:44,517 SO I'M STAYING ON TRACK, AND DR. NOW IS PROUD. 1681 01:21:44,517 --> 01:21:47,793 AND I'M JUST FEELING FANTASTIC. 1682 01:21:47,793 --> 01:21:49,724 I'M PROUD OF YOU, THOUGH. 1683 01:21:49,724 --> 01:21:51,793 THANK YOU. IT'S A BIG CHANGE. 1684 01:21:51,793 --> 01:21:54,344 I FEEL A LOT BETTER. YOU KNOW, LIKE I'M A SEXY BAE. 1685 01:21:54,344 --> 01:21:57,241 [ LAUGHS ] 1686 01:21:57,241 --> 01:22:00,655 AND I'M REAL EXCITED ABOUT LOSING EVEN MORE HERE SOON 1687 01:22:00,655 --> 01:22:03,862 AND GETTING TO MY TARGET WEIGHT IN THE NEXT NINE MONTHS. 1688 01:22:03,862 --> 01:22:06,448 AND I KNOW I CAN DO THAT. 1689 01:22:06,448 --> 01:22:07,827 WELL, THANK YOU FOR COMING. 1690 01:22:07,827 --> 01:22:09,620 THANK YOU SO MUCH. THANK YOU, HONEY. 1691 01:22:09,620 --> 01:22:12,379 I'M STILL WORKING WITH LOLA, AND I'M DOING THE HOMEWORK 1692 01:22:12,379 --> 01:22:15,758 SHE'S GIVING ME BECAUSE I SEE HOW IMPORTANT IT IS 1693 01:22:15,758 --> 01:22:17,931 SO I CAN START TO TAKE CONTROL BACK 1694 01:22:17,931 --> 01:22:20,758 INSTEAD OF GIVING IT UP TO FOOD. 1695 01:22:20,758 --> 01:22:22,689 I NEVER WANT TO GO TO THAT PLACE AGAIN 1696 01:22:22,689 --> 01:22:24,586 NOW THAT I'VE LEARNED THAT IT'S POSSIBLE 1697 01:22:24,586 --> 01:22:27,655 TO FACE A PAINFUL OR EMOTIONAL SITUATION 1698 01:22:27,655 --> 01:22:29,931 WITHOUT RUNNING TO FOOD. 1699 01:22:29,931 --> 01:22:32,827 SO I'M INCREDIBLY THANKFUL TO BE WHERE I'M AT, 1700 01:22:32,827 --> 01:22:35,482 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M LIVING MY BEST LIFE. 1701 01:22:35,482 --> 01:22:43,310 ♪♪ 1702 01:22:43,310 --> 01:22:51,103 ♪♪ 1703 01:22:51,103 --> 01:22:53,344 THIS PAST MONTH, I DECIDED IT'S TIME 1704 01:22:53,344 --> 01:22:56,413 I START TO PURSUE SOME OF MY DREAMS. 1705 01:22:56,413 --> 01:23:00,172 AND I MADE A LIST OF THINGS I ALWAYS WANTED TO DO, 1706 01:23:00,172 --> 01:23:02,586 AND I STARTED TO PUSH MYSELF TO GO OUT THERE 1707 01:23:02,586 --> 01:23:05,448 AND DO THEM ONE BY ONE. 1708 01:23:05,448 --> 01:23:08,103 ONE OF THE FIRST ONES WAS GET A JOB, 1709 01:23:08,103 --> 01:23:11,482 BECAUSE I CAN GET AROUND A LOT EASIER NOW 1710 01:23:11,482 --> 01:23:13,517 AND I HAVE THE STAMINA TO BE OUT 1711 01:23:13,517 --> 01:23:17,275 AND TO BE RELIED UPON, LIKE I SHOULD. 1712 01:23:17,275 --> 01:23:20,275 I'M DOING FOOD DELIVERIES, AND I'M LOVING IT SO FAR 1713 01:23:20,275 --> 01:23:22,724 BECAUSE IT'S GETTING ME OUT EVERY DAY 1714 01:23:22,724 --> 01:23:25,206 AND I'M MEETING NEW PEOPLE. 1715 01:23:25,206 --> 01:23:26,724 SO I REALLY LIKE IT, 1716 01:23:26,724 --> 01:23:29,137 AND IT FEELS GOOD TO BE EARNING A PAYCHECK AGAIN. 1717 01:23:29,137 --> 01:23:34,344 ♪♪ 1718 01:23:34,344 --> 01:23:36,620 IT MAY SOUND SILLY, BUT LOSING THE ABILITY 1719 01:23:36,620 --> 01:23:38,931 TO PROVIDE FOR MYSELF WAS A HUGE BLOW 1720 01:23:38,931 --> 01:23:42,448 WHEN I COULD NO LONGER WORK BECAUSE OF MY SIZE. 1721 01:23:42,448 --> 01:23:45,758 SO TO BE ABLE TO DO THIS FEELS WONDERFUL. 1722 01:23:45,758 --> 01:23:49,931 ♪♪ 1723 01:23:49,931 --> 01:23:53,724 SOME OF THE OTHER THINGS I WANT TO DO TAKE A LITTLE MORE TIME, 1724 01:23:53,724 --> 01:23:57,551 BECAUSE ULTIMATELY I WANT TO MEET SOMEONE AND START A FAMILY. 1725 01:23:57,551 --> 01:24:00,379 BUT RIGHT NOW, MY PRIORITY IS GETTING HEALTHY 1726 01:24:00,379 --> 01:24:02,965 AND FINISHING DR. NOW'S PROGRAM. 1727 01:24:02,965 --> 01:24:05,275 SO I'M COMPLETELY COMMITTED TO THAT. 1728 01:24:05,275 --> 01:24:07,241 ♪♪ 1729 01:24:07,241 --> 01:24:09,931 AND DR. NOW SAYS IF I KEEP UP MY CURRENT PACE, 1730 01:24:09,931 --> 01:24:13,793 I COULD BE READY FOR MY FIRST SKIN-REMOVAL IN FOUR MONTHS. 1731 01:24:13,793 --> 01:24:16,931 SO THAT'S MY NEXT BIG GOAL. 1732 01:24:16,931 --> 01:24:21,137 Destinee: FOR COLIN? THANK YOU. 1733 01:24:21,137 --> 01:24:24,758 AND I'M EXCITED ABOUT HOW MY BODY IS CHANGING. 1734 01:24:24,758 --> 01:24:27,103 I MAY LOSE SOME CURVES WHEN I GET SMALLER, 1735 01:24:27,103 --> 01:24:30,758 BUT I GET NEW ONES AT THE SAME TIME. 1736 01:24:30,758 --> 01:24:32,068 JUST A FEW YEARS AGO, 1737 01:24:32,068 --> 01:24:36,172 I WASN'T SURE I EVEN WANTED TO KEEP LIVING. 1738 01:24:36,172 --> 01:24:41,068 NOW I'M EXCITED ABOUT MY FUTURE AND THE LIFE I COULD HAVE. 1739 01:24:41,068 --> 01:24:44,379 AND I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO MESS THAT UP, 1740 01:24:44,379 --> 01:24:47,448 SO I'M LISTENING TO EVERYTHING DR. NOW HAS TOLD ME TO DO, 1741 01:24:47,448 --> 01:24:50,551 AND I'M MAKING SURE TO KEEP SEEING LOLA CONSISTENTLY. 1742 01:24:50,551 --> 01:24:52,793 Woman: YOU'VE ARRIVED AT YOUR DESTINATION. 1743 01:24:52,793 --> 01:24:55,793 I HAVE AROUND 250 POUNDS LEFT TO LOSE, 1744 01:24:55,793 --> 01:24:59,172 SO I'M ALWAYS HALFWAY TO WHERE I NEED. 1745 01:24:59,172 --> 01:25:03,103 BUT I KNOW THIS LAST HALF WILL BE EVEN HARDER TO LOSE, 1746 01:25:03,103 --> 01:25:07,068 BUT I'M NOT AFRAID OF THAT, AND I'M READY FOR IT. 1747 01:25:07,068 --> 01:25:09,413 I'M NOT MAKING ANY MORE EXCUSES 1748 01:25:09,413 --> 01:25:12,482 OR AVOIDING ANYTHING I NEED TO FACE, 1749 01:25:12,482 --> 01:25:16,655 'CAUSE I KNOW I CAN HAVE THE LIFE I WANT. 1750 01:25:16,655 --> 01:25:18,206 THAT'S WHAT'S GUIDING ME NOW, 1751 01:25:18,206 --> 01:25:20,931 AND THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA FOCUS ON. 1752 01:25:20,931 --> 01:25:22,758 AND I MAY NOT KNOW ALL THE THINGS 1753 01:25:22,758 --> 01:25:24,482 THAT ARE WAITING FOR ME, 1754 01:25:24,482 --> 01:25:26,172 BUT WHATEVER IT IS, 1755 01:25:26,172 --> 01:25:29,551 AS LONG AS I'M LETTING LOVE WIN OVER FEAR, 1756 01:25:29,551 --> 01:25:32,103 I HAVE NO DOUBT IT'S GONNA BE INCREDIBLE. 1757 01:25:32,103 --> 01:25:32,241 AND I CAN'T WAIT.