It was lukewarm.
The shower?
Yes.
But I would always focus on the warm instead of the luke.
It was, um...
It was what?
My refuge.
How long has the water been on on this day, Daniel?
Oh, you only have five minutes and then the water
automatically shuts off, so I would try not
to think of the time or where I was.
What's happening now?
I thought it was the guards at first.
But they sounded different somehow.
It was like I knew before I knew.
Try to stay focused on the event, the experience,
what you feel, what you see, what you hear in the moment.
Footsteps. I hear footsteps.
Almost as I turn around, somebody hits me
in the back of the head.
Do you see him?
Now I do. I see all of them.
How many?
Five.
Do you know them?
Four of them... I knew four of them.
One was executed when I was still inside.
And one was...
One lived right beside me for more than a decade.
I know it's difficult,
but try to stay in the present tense.
I try to hit him in the face, but I-I-I can't reach him
because somebody's kicking my legs out from under me.
I'm on the ground now, and it...
feels like I'm going to sleep.
To sleep?
Someone's cutting off the blood supply to my brain
and then... darkness.
When I come to, there's, uh... there's something in my mouth.
Something?
A rag... A dirty washrag.
It tastes of soap and chlorine and... and me.
What are you experiencing?
Pressure on my neck.
Someone has their, their foot on my neck and on my back.
They're pulling my legs apart.
I can't move. I can't fight.
I can't scream.
And now there's this weight on top of me, crushing me.
It's... It's difficult to breathe.
And then...
it starts.
You pray that they will kill you,
that there will be mercy bestowed upon you
by the merciless.
The water is shut off. My five minutes are up.
Now I hear everything.
What do you hear?
Grunting and... and... and laughing and, uh, encouragement.
Encouragement?
Someone giving another encouragement
like a sports team.
"Get it, boy, get it. Get some of that."
Now someone is whining.
"Why do I have to go last?"
"Shut up, asshole, or you'll be next."
Now the weight has been lifted.
I can breathe again.
But then, uh...
someone spreads me apart again and spits into me.
And then the weight again on top of me.
What is it? What's happening?
I hear it first.
Hear what?
I open my eye,
the one not pressed into the floor.
What do you see?
Up above, there's this... this spigot.
Drops from the spigot coming down.
They catch the light just... just so.
They almost look like diamonds falling from the sky.
They're so close.
I struggle to move my head...
just an inch.
With all my might, less than an inch.
There. Right there.
The drops.
They now fall into my open eye.
Blessed drops...
and I wait for the next,
and the next, and the next.
That's all I see now,
all I hear,
all I feel.
Nothing else is real.
How much?
Uh, what is it?
My grandmother's... your great-grandmother's...
flour sifter.
Okay.
Do you remember her name?
Which side of the family?
- Matthew's. - Margaret?
That's your dad's first wife's name.
Can't they both be Margaret?
They can, but they're not.
Uh, Tamika.
No. Harriet.
She should have considered Tamika.
This sifter's like 100 years old.
Okay. Let me do some research.
Got to be at least $1 for every year.
Doesn't work that way, Mom.
We'll see.
You got another hit on your bike.
How much?
$185.50.
50 cents?
Yep.
What do you think?
It's been over two weeks.
At this point, I don't think it's going up much.
I think you should take it.
Just do it, Mom. Say the word.
Sold.
Hey.
Hey, Dad.
Takes a little imagination.
I'll say.
But I think it's a better location
than that last placed we looked at.
We could just pay rent here till a better one comes along.
We?
I can help you with that for a little while.
You know?
This location doesn't exactly set one up for success.
It's just temporary, son.
Dad, you're not responsible for me anymore.
Do you know that?
Yeah, I know that.
I mean, I... I'd love to say yes to this place
or... or some other place.
I'd love to say, "Hell, yes, let's do it."
For you, Dad.
I'd love to say that for you.
It's not for me, son.
But I'm not responsible for you anymore either.
I don't want you to be.
And I think the main reason I went to work with you,
or for you, was so I could still, in some way,
try and look after you.
You know?
Like I tried to after Mom left.
But then I started to resent you for it.
I didn't treat you great, which made me
feel like shit for acting that way.
But do I mean, do I want to be here or...
or some other place 10 or 20 years from now selling tires?
I have no idea. I really don't.
I'm... I have no idea
what I want to do with my life, Dad.
But I really appreciate you trying, you know?
I really do.
And I want you to hear that.
I know you did the best you could
or you'd have done better.
Okay.
Why did he want to meet here?
No idea.
He said he wanted to see you. I asked where.
He said, "What about the roller skating rink?"
What the hell am I doing here is the real question.
Maybe you don't need to know that yet.
What in the world?
Have a seat.
Hello, Amantha.
I'm sorry.
I'm really, really sorry.
For what?
For hurting your brother.
You almost killed him, Bobby.
I thought he killed my sister.
That's all I've been told since I was 12.
And now?
I don't believe anything they say.
Well, good for you.
You shouldn't be able to do that to somebody
without paying for it.
It's not right.
I know it's not.
Are we done?
My mother wanted your mother to have this.
You don't believe in the U.S. mail?
I am not gonna forgive you, Bobby,
for what you did to my brother,
any more than you forgave my brother
for what he didn't do to your sister.
I understand.
Do you now?
I think I actually do.
Thank you.
Hi.
Hey, there.
You've created such beauty here.
I mean, it was just a box, wasn't it?
A big box.
How'd it go?
The theory is you, uh, go over and over it
until you become bored with it.
Not there yet?
No.
I'm proud of you.
Appreciate the pride.
You're tougher than you think, buddy.
And you are not as tough as you act, lady.
That stays between us.
Um...
I'm not seeing a lot of packing around here.
I thought I would finish my book first.
Your thousand-page book?
838.
Okay.
I am a better leaver than a packer.
So, what are you taking?
I don't know.
A U-Haul trailer's worth, dealer's choice.
- Art? - No, he stays.
Paintings?
Most of it, I'll leave for the new occupant.
It's kinda the lofty tradition around here.
That's why there's so much of it.
Can I just pack one box?
- No, no, no, no. - Just... Just one item.
One item you would like to see in your new room in Ohio land.
Not my sister.
That is not an item. That's a not not person.
No, it stays.
Maybe.
Okay, sure.
It needs to be wrapped.
Do I have to help you?
Probably at some point.
But not now.
Enjoy your book.
What's wrong with flour sifters?
Nothing, Mother. It's just supply and demand.
Hey, honey.
Good Lord. There's so much less.
I sold my bike today.
Well, Jared and I did.
Good for y'all.
Do you want your Legos?
What?
I don't know. Maybe.
Do I have to decide right now?
There's no rush.
I was just gonna take a few bags to Goodwill tomorrow,
so I was just wondering.
- Goodwill? - Look, they're too beat up to eBay.
Pretty much the only thing people want
is mint, new, in-box.
First, I don't want anyone eBaying or Goodwilling my shit.
No problem.
I'm glad you're moving on, Mom.
If that's what's happening here.
Just kinda need a warning of which Janet I'm gonna get...
the one who's moving on or the one
who's still knee-deep in her shit.
Because it seems I never get to be a part of the good times.
In fact, I usually get the Janet that wants me
to get knee-deep in the shit with her.
Hey, you shouldn't talk to her like that.
It's okay, Jared.
No, it's not okay.
No, I'm glad that you're enjoying
your mother being present for you, Jared.
Savor it.
Where's my dad's Army jacket?
I put it in the cedar chest.
Did something happen today, honey?
Nothing negative,
if that's what you're implying.
In fact, it was extraordinarily positive.
Bobby Dean personally apologized to me at the roller skating rink
for nearly killing your oldest son.
He's evidently real torn up about it, too.
Bless his heart.
Oh, and this is for you
from Judy... Dean.
Happy unburdening.
Come on in.
Hello, Mr. Pickens.
Ms. Person.
Well, here we all are.
Yes, ma'am. Here we all are.
Are you ready to do this?
No, ma'am, but, uh,
I always figured this day was coming.
Maybe I did, too.
Well, let's do it.
Coming.
You're not Melvin.
No.
Come on in.
Oh, thank you.
Have a look.
Grand palace.
You started back.
Yeah, just, uh, once in a while.
I'll quit again after everything settles down.
Janet came by.
The house?
She was asking about us.
Fishing.
Not surprising, knowing Janet.
I told her that we're getting a divorce.
I couldn't lie. I didn't want to.
I understand.
She says she's not gonna tell your dad anything
until you're ready.
You want something to drink?
Okay.
Want a Coke?
Or... Or a water. Doesn't matter.
Okay.
Do we... Do we get a lawyer now?
I think we're each supposed to have one.
Oh. Right.
Could get a mediator.
I mean, they're not set up to be contentious
like lawyers can be.
Just another way to go.
I like that.
Want me to look into it?
Or... Or I can.
Okay.
Why don't you do that?
Told Dad I didn't want to be in the tire business anymore.
Oh, really?
How did he react?
You know Dad... keeps it close to the vest,
but I know he's disappointed.
I basically told him he wasn't responsible
for my happiness and I wasn't for his.
That took a lot of courage, Teddy.
I don't know. Just needed to be said.
Long time coming.
What do you think you might do?
Go work for the man, I guess...
some man who's not my father and stepmother.
Let him worry about the big picture.
I don't know for sure yet.
Might take some time off. Go see my mom, maybe.
Have you talked to her?
Not yet. I probably will.
How 'bout you?
Thought about your future any?
I have.
I believe that, um, that God wants me to serve people, Teddy.
Okay.
Help people... wash their feet, so to speak.
I mean, I'm gonna finish my nursing degree first,
and then I don't know, maybe join
Doctors without Borders or something like that.
Just try and do some good in the world.
It sounds like you got a plan.
I've been praying on it.
And I believe that God has given me my answer.
I really do.
That's great, Tawney.
You think I'm daft.
No. Just the opposite.
I can definitely see you doing something like that.
I can see it so clearly, I can actually see it.
Thank you, Teddy.
That means a lot.
You want to go get some pizza or something?
I mean, you know, nothing on it.
Not the pizza but...
Nothing attached to us going to get pizza, just...
I'd like to spend some time with you before it all changes.
I think that'd be all right.
I've got about an hour. Is that okay?
It is okay.
Why wasn't Chris Nelms interrogated, Sheriff?
Well, once Holden broke...
Broke or was broken?
Once he confessed, Roland and I felt like...
Roland especially felt like,
"Why muddy the waters?" at that point.
What would have been the mud?
You know, there were a lot of rumors
going around with the kids.
Rumors about...?
Hanna's behavior.
Sexual behavior?
Yes.
That night?
That night, before that night...
just a lot of talk.
Let's focus on that night.
Um, we began questioning
some of the boys about those rumors.
And that was in between
our continued questioning of Holden.
Boys like George Melton and Trey Willis?
Those were two we focused on.
And what were their responses?
Trey straight up denied having had sex
with Hanna or having seen any other boy
have sex with her.
And George?
Basically the same thing at first,
but George seemed more nervous, less sure of himself.
It was like he was being evasive somehow.
Did you press him?
Roland did.
Was Foulkes leading the investigation?
Oh, no, no.
Not leading. Uh, Roland would spell me
from time to time with interrogations.
We were a small department, and it was all hands on deck.
And what happened when Foulkes pressed George Melton
on the issue of his possible sexual activity with Hanna?
What is it, Mr. Pickens?
Um...
Roland felt like George was nervous because of something
that he might have seen rather than something
- that he might have done. - Meaning?
He focused his questions more on whether
George had seen Daniel doing something to Hanna.
Sexually, you mean?
Yeah, and against her will.
Questioned George or led George?
Well, depends on whether you're talking
in the moment or hindsight.
In the moment.
You get so caught up in things, Ms. Person,
and you get this idea about what happened.
And it's like you get a kind of tunnel vision.
Is that what happened to you, sir?
Roland got more of it than me.
But it was contagious.
I won't lie about that.
Anyway, we took that information
back to where we were holding Daniel.
What information?
That we had an eyewitness that would testify
that he had seen Daniel raping Hanna.
George being that witness?
Yes.
What was Holden's response?
He denied it at first.
In fact, Daniel Holden said it was the other boys
who had sex with her, didn't he?
Initially, yes.
And then he came around to seeing things your way?
He came around to what we believed to be the truth.
How long did that take, Sheriff?
I don't know, uh, 10 hours.
It was getting to be toward late afternoon at that point.
And George?
Did you question him any further
about his possible sexual involvement with Hanna?
I mean, given Daniel's assertion that it was the other boys
and not Daniel himself who had sex with her that night.
I fully intended to, Ms. Person.
But?
Once Holden had confessed
to murder, to rape,
Roland felt like that we should just cut George loose,
cut all the kids loose.
But before that?
Before you cut 'em all loose, before Daniel broke,
did you question Trey about George's claim
of rape by Holden?
Roland did.
And what was Trey's response?
- Just sat there. - Sat there?
Finally, he asked Roland to repeat what George
had said about seeing Daniel rape Hanna.
And Roland did.
And Trey's response?
He just sat there again,
like he was contemplating something.
Then he said he did not see any sex at all
between Daniel and Hanna,
just them arguing with each other.
Did Roland press Trey to confirm George's claim
of sexual assault against Holden?
Oh, of course.
It was to our advantage to have,
uh, another eyewitness to that.
We were pretty sure that Trey had been hanging out with George
most of the night, so we believed that,
uh, he must have seen something, too.
But the harder that Roland pushed Trey,
the more he dug in.
That he hadn't seen a rape.
That's correct.
But at that point, we felt like
he was deceiving us.
- How so? - The way he acted so surprised
when we told him what George had said about the rape
and how careful he was becoming
before he would answer something.
Just didn't feel right.
Didn't feel right.
But, Ms. Person, again, at the time,
in the heat of the moment, we felt like that
he was just protecting a friend.
A friend?
You know, by not ratting on him.
Daniel being the friend?
Daniel being the friend, yes.
Of course I was gonna talk to Chris.
But, uh...
But?
Roger.
Roger? Who's Roger?
Roger Nelms, Chris Nelms' dad.
What's his part in all this, CJ?
Who's to say for sure?
'Cept maybe Roland.
Well, that's not gonna happen.
But first, Roger took his sweet time
bringing Chris down to the station that day,
but he was a long-time supporter of Roland,
good friend, so nobody pushed him.
When father and son finally arrived,
Roger said Chris was not gonna talk to anyone
without a lawyer present.
That didn't raise red flags?
Sure, it did.
But Roger was a lawyer himself.
So what?
Daniel had already mentioned Chris' name, hadn't he?
Well, he'd mentioned a Chris.
Did Roger Nelms and Roland have a conversation
at the station that day?
They did.
Do you know the gist of it?
I wasn't privy to it.
- It was held... - In a back room?
In private.
Do you think Roger Nelms knew exactly what Chris,
and maybe others, had done to Hanna
before he brought Chris to the station that day?
I've thought a lot about that, Carl, lately.
Roger Nelms had big plans for his son, Chris.
A serious charge like rape wasn't part of those plans.
And Chris was afraid of his dad, too.
So, could I see a man like Roger Nelms
holding his 16-year-old son's feet to the fire
till Chris caved and admitted what he had done?
Now that's more likely to me than Chris keeping a lie going
under those same conditions.
But now it's just a guess.
Did Foulkes share with you
any part of his conversation with Roger Nelms?
He did not.
He said, "Let's just hold off
on talking to Chris officially.
Keep him in our back pocket
and wait and see if Holden would, um ..."
Cave?
In a word, yes.
Box.
Put more things in box.
Physically pick stuff up.
Put it in the box.
Feel overwhelming desire
to dump box on ground and keep reading.
That good, huh?
Yeah, it's, uh... it's hilarious and sad.
It's right up your alley.
There's this part that I wanted to read you.
Uh...
I do not have time for this.
What is wrong with me?
You're just afraid.
Why am I going again?
Because you have a job there with health insurance
and, uh, a sister, a-a mother,
family there for you.
What if I just stayed here?
You'd have to unpack.
No, seriously, what if I just
pulled a Chloe on the whole plan,
just stayed here in bohemia?
Run away before I ever went to where I'm running from.
What if, Daniel?
I would love for you to stay, Chloe.
I really would.
I'm mad for you.
You've un-bored me.
You've given me, if not hope, hope for hope.
You've given me strength, courage.
No. You already had courage.
You wouldn't have made it this far if you didn't.
And I couldn't even imagine, in some way,
being a part of that little miracle thing inside your belly.
You could be the weird uncle.
The good, weird Uncle Dan.
I just want what's best for you, Chloe.
And your baby. And your life.
And I'm not sure that being with me
or being around me in the long term is...
Is.
I thought you were a romantic.
I'm 19 years and 8 months away
from not having to see a probation officer
every other week
and take random urine tests
and notify law enforcement if I move across the street,
let alone to another state.
I'm lucky if I sleep three hours a night.
That's perfect for a baby.
And I'm a...
You're what?
I'm a warehouseman, Chloe.
I pull orders from shelves all day.
A-And I'm lucky to have that job.
I make $7.85 an hour, and that's after a raise.
That's $314 a week in the 21st century.
It's not romantic.
It's stark.
It's real.
And I had to get real to survive in the world.
Do you like Harry Nilsson, Daniel?
I-I-I don't think I know his music.
You're gonna like him.
If I know anything, I just bet that Daniel Holden
will like Harry Nilsson.
Oh, I gotta pack the records, too.
Definitely taking them.
Jimmy Cliff wrote this,
but I sure do like it when Harry sings it.
Many rivers to cross
Well?
It's, uh...
it's beautiful.
No.
Aren't you gonna ask a girl to dance?
Wandering, I am lost
As I travel along
The white cliffs of Dover
May I have this dance, Chloe?
Always, Daniel.
Many rivers to cross
And it's only my will
That keeps me alive
Well, I've been licked, washed up for years
You're a pretty good dancer there, bud.
My mother would make me dance with her
when I was a teenager.
She would make you?
She felt it was important for a boy to know how.
For his future.
Well, it's paying off now.
It is. Yes.
My woman left me and she didn't say why
Well, I guess I have to try-y-y
Sweet thing
And this loneliness just won't leave me alone
You know it's such a drag to be on your own
So, doing some spring cleaning, I see.
I am. How's Gladys?
Who?
Edith.
She's down in Florida.
How nice.
Yeah.
Hey.
Hey, Teddy.
Jared said you was on a bit of a tear.
Has to be done every 35 years or so, I guess.
How are you doing?
I'm doing all right.
That's good.
Tawney said she, uh, told you about...
- about our, um... - She did.
I'm sorry, Teddy.
Hey, what's with the limp?
Hunting accident.
I need to go and tell Dad.
It's not fair for you to have to sit on this.
I'm okay.
If somebody else finds out, though, you know?
I just gotta go on and do it.
Get it over with.
He's in the backyard, mulching.
Do you mind being back there with us?
I think it might help.
If you want me to.
I do.
Okay.
Look who showed up.
Hey, Dad.
Just mulching a little bit.
I see that. Looking good out here.
Not like when you cut trees back.
Don't think time of year matters with mulch,
though I'm sure some TV guy would tell me different.
Well, I need to do some of that myself,
now that I think about it.
Well, if I got any left, you're welcome to it.
I'm sure we got plenty at the house.
So, what brings you by?
I need to tell you something, Dad.
Oh, yeah?
There's no good time to do it, really.
I thought I'd wait until after we got
everything with the store settled, but...
Anyway, Dad,
see, uh, thing is...
Well, go on and tell me, if you're gonna tell me.
Me and Tawney, uh, you know,
we've been seeing this lady therapist off and on.
And it's been helping. It really has.
And she's very good at what she does.
You know, empathetic and stuff.
And I think we've both grown from it.
I know we have, in fact.
But...
it's not gonna work out for us, Dad.
And we gave her a good try, I tell you that.
I mean, we tried just about as hard as one can.
And I feel good about that.
But we're getting a divorce, Dad.
We love each other, that'll always be.
And she's still family far as I'm concerned.
But that's just the way it is.
I kind of figured that was it.
You don't hear a lot of times about couples
coming back together after they separate.
I guess you don't.
We love you, of course.
Both of you.
We'll support you the best we can.
I appreciate that, Dad.
And it's probably not a good idea
to be alone too much right now.
So, of course, you can come over here any time you want.
I mean, if it's all right with your mother.
Absolutely.
Any time, Teddy. We're counting on it.
I'll heed your advice. Thank you, Dad.
Well.
I'm gonna go get cleaned up.
I meant Janet.
Thank you for saving money today at Thrifty Town.
Got any trash?
'Bout half full.
I'll take it.
Amantha.
Hi.
Jenny.
Hey.
I'm sorry I missed you at the McGuires' shindig.
Mm. You missed a blow out. Capri Suns and a bounce house.
Billy said it was quite the event.
Well, Mr. Billy was right.
Of course, Natalie always did have
the biggest birthday parties when she was a kid.
And the tradition continues.
That's right.
I forgot about her birthday events.
I would always come home from those so depressed.
Yeah, or pissed off.
"Mama, why can't I have a juggler
at my birthday party like Natalie does?"
That's right, she had a juggler that one time.
- Serious B.O., too. - That was because of the polyester costume.
Polyester and juggling?
That's a terrible combo.
I'm so sorry, Jenny.
There's no reason to be sorry, Amantha.
Except for still being so pretty.
I missed you for like a year after I quit talking to you.
It hurt my feelings, Amantha.
Terribly. I won't say it didn't.
But Mama said you were trying the best way you knew how
to deal with a terrible tragedy
and for me not to take it personally.
Which eventually, I didn't.
God, I miss your mama.
She's available if you need some bossing around some time.
So, were you surprised to hear that I was working at Thrifty Town?
Surprised? I fainted.
Seriously, when I came to, I asked why I fainted.
When they told me a second time, I fainted again.
You haven't drowned in there, have you?
Still soaking.
You'll get all wrinkly.
I'm already wrinkly.
Want me to scrub your back?
I don't mind.
I guess.
That's the one area you can't reach yourself, i'nt it?
Nope.
Feel good?
It does.
I love you, Ted.
I love you, too, Janet.
What you listening to?
Uh, homework.
For your therapy?
Yes.
Well, that's good, Dan.
Well.
What is it?
Got a job.
That's great, Pickle.
Working at a dry cleaner's, surprise.
When do you start?
Monday.
You excited?
A little nervous.
Called my mama, of course.
She pushing 80, but I'm still her baby, you know?
Yes.
Lord, she carried on, too.
I bet.
Anyway.
We'll probably have a little celebration,
just the fellas, nothing fancy.
Meat and three.
Meat and three?
That's where you get one meat
and three vegetables... big around here.
Oh, right. Sounds nice.
Hope you can join us.
I wouldn't miss it, Pickle, not for anything.
How'd your day go?
I helped a friend pack.
Well, that's a gift.
It was. Sure was.
Okay. Well, um, got group in a few.
I'll be there.
Chop wood. Carry water.
I'm on the ground now.
And it feels like I'm going to sleep.
To sleep?
Someone's cutting off the blood supply to my brain
and then, uh, darkness.
When I come to, there's, uh... there's something in my mouth.
Something?
A rag... A dirty washrag.
It tastes of soap and chlorine and... and me.
What are you experiencing?
My neck.
Pressure on my neck.
Someone has their... their foot on my neck and on my back.
They're pulling my legs apart.
I can't move. I can't fight.
I can't scream.