♪♪
Previously on The Fosters...
You'd have a better chance of getting in to the university,
if you chose a less competitive major.
The point is to just get in,
and then, you could always transfer into art.
Jude: Speaking of Mom, can we visit her grave on Mother's Day?
Hey, Dad.
I'm Natalie. Would you guys like to come over for dinner?
Sure.
We alter some your cells,
then re-insert them into your body to attack the cancer.
-Good.
It seems like it.
It's a meditation retreat.
No excuses for not going.
Emma: Drew shut down STEAM,
We're gonna keep doing STEAM off campus.
We'll let you know when and where... not.
You don't have time for me,
but you have time to be a roller derby manager.
Why not give it a try myself?
Mariana: Is Tess gay?
Is that why she made Logan's dad move out?
Tess: If you hurt him,
I tell you I will make sure that he doesn't want anything to do with you.
Now that you're almost a senior,
I just wanted to check in,
and see where your head is at about college.
Okay, well, here's my list.
All top-ten in all of their categories,
and top 25 over all.
Yeah, these are great schools.
Have you considered any less competitive options?
In addition to these?
Less, um...
No, I mean, well, my GPA is a 4.2,
and I got a 1360 on my PSATs.
Well, that can be said about most of the students
that apply to these schools.
And less than 10% actually get in.
Okay, but...
I doubt any of those 10%
are on a kick-ass roller derby team.
Although, I-I haven't quite made it on the team yet.
Tryouts are this afternoon,
but I'm pretty confident I'll make it.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Um, what happened with STEAM?
Why'd you drop out of that?
I-I didn't drop out.
I-I'm just, you know, mixing it up.
Colleges want to see you stick with something.
They wanna know what you're passionate about.
And there's a real need for a diverse perspective in STEAM.
If you focus on that,
that could be the thing that sets you apart.
Puts you in that top 10%.
♪ It's not where you come from ♪
♪ It's where you belong ♪
♪ Nothin' I would trade ♪
♪ I wouldn't have it any other way ♪
♪ You're surrounded ♪
♪ By love and you're wanted ♪
♪ So never feel alone ♪
♪ You are home with me ♪
♪ Right where you belong ♪
♪ Don't care you came before ♪
♪ I'm gonna give you more ♪
♪ I've never been so sure ♪
♪ I got that ♪
♪ You know they're coming for me ♪
♪ I got that, I got that ♪
♪ I'm good at that ♪
Ximena: Five more seconds!
♪ I got that, I got that ♪
Time!
Scariana, STEAM Engine, and Lucha Linda.
-27 laps in under five minutes.
Well done, ladies.
You made the team.
You are now full-fledged, contact-cleared Traumacitas.
Everyone else, please stay and keep training with us.
You were so close. Let's give it up for them guys!
Okay, for all my new and returning Traumacitas,
position try-outs are in two days.
I expect everyone to be here.
Either to defend the spot you have,
or try your luck in another position.
Angela: Now, go get some rest.
Great job, everyone.
You should totally go out for jammer.
You're super tough.
Oh, thanks, I might.
Wait, I-I thought you wanted to block.
Jammer sounds like fun, too. Why?
Well, I mean, it's just...
there are two spots,
and Poppy and I have been working really hard for them.
Yeah.
Totally cool. Blocker it is.
-Congratulations. -Yeah, you were awesome!
-You, too.
Hey, so we're all going to get some pizza to celebrate.
-Mariana: Cool. -I wish I could.
I got to work on my robot.
For what?
This STEAM internship over the summer.
It's for the Bandt Foundation.
It's super competitive.
They only accept 25 students all over the country.
Do you really wanna spend
the entire summer in LA, though?
In Venice Beach, and uh, yeah.
If I get into this program,
I can pretty much go to any college I want.
When do I get to see your 'bot?
-Tomorrow after school. -Okay.
Ladies, let's get measurements for your jerseys.
Hey, uh, do you think you could work with me
on my jammer tryout?
Yeah, sure, but you and Mariana are the best contenders we got.
Yeah, I just I want it so much,
and Ximena's not convinced that I'm jammer material,
so I really got to kill it.
Okay, I'll work with you,
but don't worry. You got this.
Going somewhere?
Uh, yeah.
Grace and I got a gig opening
for Someone's Little Sister at one of their shows.
and since Grace's mom is gonna be out of town,
we're just gonna spend the weekend
working on our set.
"Working on your set."
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
No, seriously, this is...
super important to her.
It's something she's always wanted to do.
So when will you find out if the gene therapy worked?
Uh, a few weeks.
But you know, she's feeling really good right now.
-Good. -Yeah.
Hey.
Are we gonna, uh...
Are you gonna drive us to dinner tomorrow night?
With Donald and his...
Natalie?
Alright, um...
Listen, is it cool if you just go without me?
What
I-I have a lot of homework and stuff.
Come on, Callie.
I really want to go, and...
it'll be weird if I'm alone.
Please?
Whatcha reading?
The news.
Everything's so bleak.
It's like the damn world is ending.
Well, it's not a good idea to read this stuff before bed.
Hey.
Better to do something like, you know, this.
-Hmm.
Or a little of this.
-Or this. -Stop, stop. I'm just not in the mood, love.
Okay.
So, have you thought any more about
going on that couple's retreat your mom gave us?
-She did pay for it. Seriously?
It's just gonna be a bunch of old hippies running around
doing breathing circles,
and naked hikes.
Or it's time away.
Just the two of us.
I looked it up online,
and the grounds are absolutely gorgeous.
And we don't have to do anything we don't wanna do.
What? So we go, and we don't participate?
Now we're the weirdos.
Don't worry about it. I will talk to my mom.
Tell that we're just-- we're not interested,
and tell her that she should try to get money back, you know?
Good news. My mom's gone.
Bad news. My ghost is back.
So, I've had this ghost off and on since I was a kid,
and he's not, like, always around,
but he's back now.
You think I'm nuts, right?
No, no, I--
A little, but...
I'm sorry. The last thing I wanna do is ruin this weekend.
So, can you, uh...see it?
No. No, he-- he's more of a presence.
He? Oh, so it's a he.
-I'm pretty sure. Yeah. -Hmm.
Well, is he friendly like Casper?
You know what? I probably shouldn't have said anything. I'm...
Let's just practice. Forget it.
What? Grace, look. I wasn't--
No, it's fine. Just forget it.
Hey!
-Hey! Come in, come in.
-Hi! -This is really nice.
-Thank you! Thank you. -Yeah, this is...
-all Natalie here. -Oh, come on, you helped!
No, I know, but it's your place, I don't live here.
Yeah, although you should.
Considering you're here practically all the time.
Dinner is almost ready.
-It-- it smells good. -Oh, thanks. Caleb!
Our company's here.
This is Caleb, my son.
-Hey. -Nice to meet you.
-Hi. -Hey.
Your shoes were in the middle of the foyer again.
Someone could trip over them...
like me, just now.
-Oops.
Hey, can I do this six weeks STEAM internship in Venice Beach
if I get accepted?
Yeah, I don't see why not as long as it doesn't cost a ton of money.
All expenses paid.
Well, hell, sign me up.
Oh, by the way, Logan's coming over later to study.
Wait, you did not talk to him about Tess, did you?
Oh, no.
Definitely not after what Tess said to me.
What did Tess say to you?
Well, she, uh...
sorta, kinda threatened
to forbid Logan from seeing me if I said anything.
Donald has told us so much about you two.
Oh, yeah? Like what?
I... mostly things, uh, from when you were little.
Um...
What are you up to now?
Not much.
-He's a gamer.
This company pays him to play their video games.
Oh, that's cool!
They pay you to do that?
Uh, yeah.
-Wow!
Not really. I'm mostly into sports.
Baseball, basketball, soccer.
-Donald: Yeah, he's a really great athlete. -Natalie: Yeah!
Sometimes I feel like more of a chauffeur,
because I'm just driving him around to all of his events,
but Donald helps out a lot.
And you, you're a-- you're a senior, right?
Where you thinking about next year?
Oh, well, I applied to a few colleges.
-Cool.
Sonoma State,
Portland State...
And UCSD. The art program.
Great. You hear back from any?
I got into Portland.
-Cool! -Congratulations!
UCSD's her first choice though.
She's an amazing artist.
-Natalie: Mm. -That's cool.
I like to draw, but I'm not that good.
That's not true, you got the um...
-Your blue ribbon. -The ribbon at the contest at school.
Honorable mention.
Yeah, well it's-- it's not nothing. I mean, it--
So where's your dad?
Um, Caleb's father and I divorced when he was very little.
He's not really into being a dad.
Yeah, that sucks when that happens.
It is one thing if she doesn't want to tell Dean, but to threaten Mariana?
I don't like it either.
Well, I'm going over there--
Lena, please.
Why are you so obsessed with the Bayfield's personal business?
-Um, so you didn't bring any books...
to a study date.
Well, I figured you got the study part down and, um...
I got the date part.
Mm.
I am not obsessed, I have tried very hard to stay out of this.
But Tess keeps dragging this whole family into it and I--
You are letting yourself be dragged.
No, I am not!
Why does it bother you so much that Tess might be a lesbian?
It's got a lot of crazy rules and characters and stuff,
but once you figure it out, it's super fun.
So, you and that guy are-- I've heard of gamers before,
but you're "gay
Yeah. My dad didn't tell you I was gay?
No, but it's cool.
We went to Hawaii over Christmas. You ever been?
I thought we could have dessert out here.
Such a lovely night.
-No. No, I've got it covered.
-You guys visit, I'll bring it out. -Great. Thank you.
-She's nice. -Yeah.
Yeah, she's a good-- good person.
How long have you been seeing her?
About a year, I guess.
Sounds like she wants you to move in here.
Yep.
I notice you're not wearing your mom's locket, huh?
Oh, yeah. Um, took it off.
My friend gave me this.
It's pretty.
All right, so tell me all about art school. You must be excited.
-I didn't get in.
Um, but I haven't told anyone yet.
-Oh, I'm sorry. -No, it's fine. I didn't think I would.
Oh, still you-- you must be disappointed.
Well, yeah, but--
Yeah, I try not to want anything too much.
It's okay, you know. I can go to Portland State.
You know?
They don't have an art program like UCSD's but...
Well, how do you feel about going out of state?
Fine.
I hear Portland's supposed to be a cool town.
So...
at least I got in somewhere.
Grace and Brandon: ♪ I see those waves crashing ♪
♪ But they can't touch us, no ♪
♪ Lightning on the mountain flashing ♪
♪ I say let it light our road ♪
♪ Tell me what is time anyway I'll be by your side ♪
♪ All the way ♪
Do you hate this song?
No, I-- I--I love it. I think it's one of your best.
I think it's too sentimental. Maybe it needs more edge or something, right?
No, I-- I don't think so.
You know, maybe our whole set does.
We should just start over.
I mean, how many chances are we gonna get to actually open up for a legit band?
Uh, I don't think we have enough time to write a whole new set.
Um... why don't we just take a break?
Yeah, a permanent one. I'm a terrible songwriter.
That's not true, Grace.
And I am wasting all of my alone time with you being terrible.
Well, I mean that part is true.
But it's not you being terrible. Okay?
What?
I feel like the ghost is watching.
Well, maybe that's his thing.
Yeah, you know what? We probably shouldn't.
Okay, yeah.
What?
What
I mean, you don't want to write music, now you don't want to--
I mean, you said it yourself. We're wasting our alone time and why?
There's no such thing as ghosts.
Okay, there's like 30 holes in this wall.
Okay, it took me a while to get the picture even.
Well, this is your problem. There's nothing supernatural about it.
Okay, listen, if you don't understand then just--
You're right, I don't understand.
Like, what-- Are you, like, nervous about the gig?
Is that why you're sabotaging everything?
I mean, why did this ghost suddenly come back now?
I don't know!
But I'm scared.
Okay, I mean
That's allowed.
I'm scared because I only feel him when I'm sick.
What if I'm still sick?
So the first time I sensed him,
I was nine when I went to the hospital for the first time.
And then he came back the second time when I was thirteen.
And last week when they put the T cells in.
And what does it feel like, this, uh
It's kind of like a heaviness.
But he's never come home with me before
and that's why I'm freaking out. I mean, maybe-- maybe...
maybe the treatment isn't working. Maybe he knows I'm still sick.
Or maybe he knows you aren't sick anymore.
Otherwise he'd just wait for you to get back to the hospital, right?
Suddenly you're an expert in ghost rules?
Well, maybe he followed you home
because he knows that you're never gonna go back to the hospital.
Okay, so he's just gonna hang around here from now on?
No, but I mean, what if he's, you know,
ready to move on but he needs you to help.
You know, like help him go to the light or whatever.
I thought you didn't believe in ghosts.
Just because I can't feel him doesn't mean he's not here.
Okay.
Well, then if that's the case,
what do we do?
We help him, right?
Yeah.
So we're done talking about this?
You know what? There's nothing to talk about. I don't care if Tess is a lesbian.
I don't care if she's a leprechaun or a unicorn, I just wish--
What?
-Good job.
Excuse me?
Thanks to you, Logan now knows his mom is a lesbian.
-Oh, no. -I told you he was coming over.
You couldn't have kept your voices down?
He looked like he just got punched in the stomach
and then he told me he needed to go home.
It would have been so much better if I just told him like I wanted to.
Hey, what are you--
I was looking for Jesus.
Are
Well, I was thinking about it.
Well... you can't.
Why not? I mean, what if we both get it?
How cool would it be to spend the whole summer together in L.A.?
Yeah, I told you it's one of the most competitive high school internships in the country.
There's no way that they're going to accept two students from the same city,
let alone the same high school.
Well, our college counselor said I needed more STEAM stuff on my resume.
Then come back to STEAM club.
You don't have to apply for my internship.
Oh, you mean the STEAM club that you basically kicked me out of?
That is not exactly how that went down.
Sorry, and by the way, since when is this your internship?
Because I'm the one who told you about it.
This is my thing.
Okay, well derby's my thing
and I didn't have a problem with you joining that.
This is different.
Okay, well I'm sorry but it's not fair for you to tell me
I can't apply to something just because you are.
Hey.
What happened to you today?
Um--
You were supposed to come over to look at my robot?
Oh. Damn it. Um--
I'm sorry. I was-- I was helping Poppy get ready for her jammer tryout.
I totally spaced.
Yeah, well I needed your help today too
but I guess I'm not a priority anymore.
Got it.
-Good. They're good.
Yeah.
We're happy.
You know, it's funny. You said that you don't let yourself want anything too much.
But you let yourself want a family and you got one.
Yeah.
Yeah. I know your-- your mom dying so suddenly,
to be blindsided by that, you want to protect yourself.
You think maybe you're holding back?
Why do you think you didn't get in to art school?
Think...
maybe I didn't let myself want it enough
and maybe they sensed that.
Even though you did.
So... do you think if you told them that, then they'd give you another chance?
Come on, I don't want to see you
miss out on the good things in life 'cause you're playing it safe.
Do you think that's why you haven't moved in with Natalie?
'Cause you're playing it safe?
You're allowed to be happy, you know.
You don't have to pay for what happened for the rest of your life.
Did Jude come out here?
No, he's inside with Caleb, right?
No. No, he's nowhere in the house.
Do you think he just left?
Hey!
What are you doing?
Why'd you leave
Are you not gonna say goodbye? That's so rude!
All this time, I just assumed that Donald didn't reach out to us because he was too depressed
or something about what he did to Mom.
It turns out he was just too busy with his new family.
Yeah, Donald should have reached out to us. Absolutely.
We learned a long time ago that we can't count on him.
But no matter what,
you can always count on me. Okay?
How? You're not even gonna be here.
I heard your conversation on the porch.
-Jude, come on. I-- -You're going to Portland.
Can we just get back in the car, okay?
We can talk about this at home.
I'm gonna walk. I want to be alone.
Okay, so this very legitimate website that I have here
says that you should talk to the ghost like you would a child
or a misbehaving pet.
Okay.
Ghost, this is Grace.
You shouldn't have followed me here. Bad ghost!
Uh, but don't condescend.
You know? Be-- Be firm, but kind, you know?
Just in case the ghost may be traumatized.
Oh, from what?
-Death. -Right, okay.
I'm sorry about that, ghost.
Um, I know you've been through a lot,
but trust me, I've been through a lot too.
You've been with me through most of it, but, um--
But she doesn't need you anymore.
Uh, you don't have to look out for her.
She's got an army of T-cells running through her blood stream for that.
And, uh, she has me.
I-- I know that we got off on the wrong foot, ghost--
Do ghosts have feet?
I--
Anyway, um--
But I-- I won't let anything happen to her.
I promise.
-Okay, now we do the sage thing. -Oh.
Do you want to read the ancient banishing spell?
Um, sure.
Okay. Switch.
"Ashes to ashes,
"dust to dust.
"Let the wind take you,
"meandering spirit, beyond this impasse
and on to where you belong."
Did it work?
I think so. Um...
I'm not sensing him right now but I mean, I guess he could come back.
Oh, that's what the salt's for.
Oh.
Oh, uh, what about the windows?
Well, I just used it all. I mean, do you really think he's gonna come back?
No. No, um...
You know, we should probably have sex right now. Just in case.
-Uh-huh, okay, yeah.
Sorry about UCSD.
Me too.
You're a great artist.
They're dumb.
Maybe they are.
I guess I just thought that...
you'd go to college nearby
and live at home.
Portland's really far away.
And we just got here.
Home,
I mean.
That's why I can leave.
You know, it's not just me and you anymore.
You have all these people
to look out for you who love you as much as I do.
I mean, almost as much as I do.
But...
you go off to college and...
this is it.
This is the last time we're gonna live together.
Jude, you're my brother.
This is my home, I will always come back.
It's not like we're gonna be any less close.
What was it Mom used to say?
We're two sides of the same coin.
I'm sweet and you're spicy.
Exactly.
I can't be without my sweet side for too long.
♪ This heart of mine ♪
♪ Lover to most ♪
All right, who's trying out for jammer?
Wish me luck?
Luck.
Okay? But you don't need it, remember? You put in the work.
-You got this. -Okay.
That's it
We've got two slots.
I mean, if no one else wants it, we don't need to have tryouts I guess.
I'll give it a shot.
Ximena: All right, newbie. I like your attitude.
What are you doing?
It's not fair to tell me that I can't try out for something just because you are.
Okay, ladies, show me how fast you can take off on your toe-stops.
Ximena: Toes down... go!
♪ ♪
Grace: ♪ I see those waves crashing ♪
♪ But they can't touch us, no ♪
♪ Lightning on the mountain flashing ♪
♪ I say let it light our road ♪
♪ Tell me what is time anyway ♪
♪ I'll be by your side ♪
♪ All the way ♪
This is like, really working now, right?
Yeah.
It really is.
I think-- I think, um...
the treatment's working, too.
I think I'm getting better.
Ximena: Let's see you jam through these five blockers.
Good bounce, good bounce!
-Yes!
Mariana, that's gonna be tough to beat!
Poppy, you're up.
Stay on your feet!
What was that?
I just want to help.
Don't!
Nice work, but Mariana still got the top time.
Emma, let's see what you got.
What the hell, Emma?
You started out strong, but that contact cost you valuable seconds.
All right, everyone. The results are in.
With the fastest combined times,
our first jammer is Mariana!
And joining her by a one second margin:
Emma!
-Yeah, Emma!
You were really good out there. You'll get it next time.
I'm so sorry.
It's fine.
Do you want something to drink?
Do you want... water?
-Mm-hmm.
Okay.
So, what's up?
I just, um...
I was rude to you and Natalie, and--
No. No, no, no. You don't apologize. You wanna sit down?
Uh, yeah.
Have a seat.
Uh, did-- Was it the--
So Caleb thought that
you were mad because I didn't tell him that you were gay
and it's not that I think there's anything wrong with that at all.
It's just Jude, I don't know if it's my place
to say something or not say something or--
You can tell anyone.
Okay, that's good to know.
I just...
I kind of assumed you didn't want to be a dad.
Or couldn't be.
But then I saw you with Caleb--
No, no.
No, Jude--
Don't worry about that, I'm not Caleb's dad.
And I'm not trying to be Caleb's dad.
Why not?
What do you mean?
Caleb doesn't have a dad who cares about him.
You're practically there all the time.
Why shouldn't you be a dad to him?
Well, how would you feel about that?
I think I'd feel worse for Caleb
if you were, like, holding back because of me.
Oh.
It's okay.
Hey, are you mad at me?
Why'd you try out for jammer?
Is it because you're pissed at Mariana for applying to your stupid internship?
It's not stupid.
And why shouldn't I go out for jammer if she's gonna go out for what she wants?
Because it's not about Mariana, Emma.
It's about Poppy,
who you just royally screwed over.
I mean, after everything that she's been through with her parents,
she needed this.
What about what I need?
What, you need to be jammer?
No.
I don't want to be jammer.
Why not?
I want Poppy to have it.
She's not gonna want something she didn't earn.
That's not how this team works.
Okay, we compete against ourselves, not each other.
We empower our sister to do her best,
even if her best is better than ours,
because we're badasses here.
You have nothing to feel bad about.
I'm sorry.
Don't be.
You earned it.
Apply for the internship.
It's cool.
Helen! Hi.
Do you have a minute?
Yeah, of course.
So I got my rejection letter.
Yes, I'm sorry it didn't work out.
Yeah, I want to appeal the decision.
That's something I can do, right?
Yeah, but you should know that very few appeals are successful.
Okay, I want to try.
Yeah, I realized that in my application and my portfolio,
I was holding back a little.
I just don't think that I showed just how much I really want to be a part of this program
and I'd love another chance to prove that.
Well, I have seen you struggle to put yourself out there.
And I promise I am working on that.
But can I be frank with you?
Sure.
The reason you didn't get in to the program wasn't because you didn't want it enough.
And it definitely wasn't because you lack the talent.
It's because the passion, the fire I see you have for helping Ximena,
that's what's missing in your art.
But I can fix that, right?
Maybe, or maybe you shouldn't fix it.
Maybe you should go where the fire is already stoked.
What do you mean?
I mean... maybe art isn't your true calling.
Is Stef here?
Why?
Because my son is very upset
and I need to speak with her.
No.
Excuse me?
You're not talking to my wife, you're not talking to my daughter,
or anyone else who you're trying to drag into your mess.
You need to keep your business on your side of the fence.
And if you want to come out, you need to do that by yourself.
We have got...
our own problems to deal with in this house.
So just please leave us alone.
Yeah, okay. Sorry.
♪ Yeah, that's my love ♪
♪ Like a ghost ♪
♪ Does she know everything I say ♪
You have-- you have feelings for her?
No.
I don't, I have...
I have feelings about her...
about me.
What about
About everything. My life.
Are you not happy with our life?
That's not it.
I'm unhappy with me.
Let's just go away.
Let's do the couples thing, the retreat that my mother got us.
Please?
♪ ♪