♪ MTV
RuPaul: Previously onAll Stars...
For this week's maxi-challenge,
we're playing the Snatch Game!
[laughter and applause] Feel it!
You need to impersonate two celebrities.
-Oh, my God. -[laughs]
It's Satan!
Hey, girl!
This is the closest I'm ever gonna get to a snatch.
[all laugh]
You were phenomenal.
I quit smoking today.
Well, what are you smoking?
I didn't say it was going well.
Is that my camera?
♪ Gentlemen, start your engines ♪
Pfft. Mind-blowing good.
The top two All Stars of the week are
Jinkx Monsoon and Trinity the Tuck.
Trinity, Shea blocked you last week,
so you will not receive a legendary Legend Star.
Well, shit.
This is your chance to win $10,000
and block one of your fellow queens.
Jinkx Monsoon, you're a winner, baby.
[cheers and applause]
With great power comes great responsibility.
Shea.
Ha!
[cries]
Hello!
She owns 51% of this werkroom.
Still on my ca-ca-cow, bitch.
This is how I'm feeling:
Bam, bam-bam-bam bam, bam.
Bam, bam, bam.
Bop-bop-bop, bop-bop-bop, bam.
Bam, bam-bam-bam bam, bam.
Bop-bop-bop, bop-bop-bop, bop-bop-bop, bam.
Well done, Jinkx!
[cheers and applause]
I feel good.
Girl, you just won $10,000. You better feel real good.
I feel damn good, yes.
Listen, can you give us your reasoning on why you chose Shea?
I feel like I had talked about it,
but the thing that made the most sense to me
is to block someone who already has a star.
I think Snatch Gamemight be one of her only stumbles,
so if I didn't block her now, I might not get another chance.
I think it's a very, very smart move.
Yeah.
I would have probably done the same thing.
Yeah. Not getting blocked is a huge relief,
because at this point, having a legendary Legend Star
puts a very big target on my back.
So I'm happy about flying under the radar a little bit.
You know, I'm just little old Monét X Change
from All Stars 4.
Would anyone have not blocked Shea tonight?
I would have lingered around Monét just to make her sweat.
[all laugh]
-Ooh! -Oh, dear.
Well, time for the Shea to hit the fan.
[chuckles]
Look who came to fix our plumbing.
Of course I took it as a compliment that I got blocked.
At least I know that y'all scared.
That don't mean that I like it.
This is a game of chess now.
Let's make these girls a little nervous.
Shea, that smile on your face is very menacing,
and also very scary.
What's the tea, girl?
I've learned of the platinum plunger's full potential.
-Oh, Fuck off. -Oh.
I did not know that it is the gift that keeps on giving.
Oh, what does that mean?
What the fuck does that mean?
Obviously, the platinum plunger is just the platinum plunger.
There is no secret. I made it up.
See, I smelled this.
Wait. Do these bitches know something that we don't know?
Ooh, the anxiety.
It makes me feel so much better about getting blocked.
[laughs]
That's how you play a game, bitch.
I mean, Trinity came very close to unlocking its true potential,
so if only I can carry it all the way through.
[all laugh]
You could call it mind games, whatever you wanna call it.
[whispers]
Oh, no!
But I just go with it. I think it's funny.
[laughs]
All will be revealed.
I think that the plunger is exactly where it belongs.
Oh, stop it. This is evil!
[laughs]
Jinkx, what did you do?
I don't know!
You absolutely did what you were supposed to do.
-You did. -Yeah.
Oh, God, why is she saying stuff like that?
There's clearly some rules that some ladies don't know about.
-If you wanna find out... -Get blocked?
Get the plunger.
Or maybe they're just fucking with us.
Who knows?
No, they're not, they're not, they're not.
Are they? [all laugh]
With that being said, let's get undressed.
Yeah. [all laugh]
This is like a game of Clue:
fun for all ages, but very confusing.
There's games on games--
On games on games.
But I don't play games very well,
so this is my plan of action, y'all.
Step one: look drop-dead gorgeous.
What is that?
It's called "fashion," ho.
-[laughs] -That's the easy part, okay?
The second part is to play Inspector Gadget.
What is the tea?
Oh, my God!
You scared me. [laughs]
But the thing about plans is sometimes they fall through.
So the plan is to not have a plan at all.
You following me? I don't know.
I don't even know if I'm following me.
[laughs]
Oh, my God, she's going down!
♪ RuPaul's Drag Race
RuPaul: The winner of RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars
receives a one-year supply
of Anastasia Beverly Hills cosmetics,
a cash prize of $200,000,
and will be crowned queen of all queens.
With extra-special guest judge Kirby Howell-Baptiste.
♪ RuPaul's Drag Race
♪ May the best drag queen win
♪ Best drag queen win
♪ Da da-da-da da da da
Here she is!
-We have a winner! -[laughs]
So bright under all these stars.
It is a brand-nizew dizzay in the werkrizoom,
and I am rizeddy to fuck some shit up.
[laughs]
Good morning to the legendary stars only.
Ooh.
Fuck our drag. [all laugh]
Well, bitch, out of four potential stars,
we have three.
[all laugh]
Last week was frustrating to me.
To win the Snatch Game and not be awarded for it,
call me a bitter Betty, bitch.
But now I'm not blocked,
so nothing is standing in my way. Huh.
[alarm]
She done already done had herses.
My All Stars, life's like a wheel,
and the struggle is real.
So if you wanna win it, first you gotta spin it.
Now, let me spell it out, just in case I lost ya.
You could ask for a vowel, but it's gonna cost ya.
If we are having to do a spelling bee,
girl, I have already lost.
[all laugh]
Hello, hello, hello!
-Hi! -Yes!
Werk, queen, werk.
[all laugh]
My queens!
Now, for today's mini-challenge,
we're gonna play Hung Man.
[laughter and applause]
♪ Oh, Pit Crew
[cheering]
Oh, yes, I love this game.
Not that kind of hung man.
[snap]
Although I like the way you think.
[all laugh]
This kind.
-Oh! -Oh!
This is a before and after puzzle.
Each answer contains two different things
with one word in common.
For example, what's the t-shirt?
Now, you'll take turns choosing a letter,
and then try to solve the puzzle.
Are you ready to play?
-Yeah! -Yes!
First up, Shea Couleé.
Show me T?
T. Let's see if there's a T up here.
Would you like to give it a guess?
The clock is ticking.
[buzzer]
Up next is Monét X Change.
I would like to have a vowel, a Z.
Z is not a vowel, bitch.
[all laugh]
Is there a Z?
[buzzer] Whah. There's no Z.
Jinkx Monsoon.
Show me R.
Oh!
Mm.
Spit it out.
Um... [buzzer]
We're all very puzzled by this puzzle.
S. [buzzer.
B. [buzzer]
P!
P! Oh!
[mumbles] party.
Cuckoo crazy cunty.
Ganja shit fox.
Fist me hard in the ass.
Does it say Fist me hard in the ass?
[buzzer] I'm afraid not.
[all laugh]
None of us are being invited to game night, for sure.
Jinkx Monsoon, you are up.
N?
I got it! It's Vanna White party.
[cheers and applause]
Let's show Jinkx what she's won.
Oh, you've won nothing.
[all laugh]
Now, ladies, this puzzle is just the beginning,
because for this week's maxi-challenge,
we are throwing the Realness of Fortune Ball.
[cheers and applause]
#AllStars7.
Ladykins, you need to serve three looks each.
First category is Vanna White Realness,
classic game show hostess glamour.
Second category is Before and After.
Think Diana Ross Mathews.
[all laugh]
Eew.
[all laugh]
And third category is Realness of Fortune Eleganza
made from scratch.
And the spin of this wheel
will determine which exotic vacation destination
will be your color inspiration.
And if fortune favors you,
you can win some extra coin while you spin.
Oh!
Jinkx, you solved the puzzle, so you get to spin the wheel.
Big money, big money, big money!
No, stop, stop, stop!
Ooh!
Jinkx, you landed on
the lavender fields of Provence, France.
Shea Couleé, it's your turn.
Oh!
Oh.
Oh! [all laugh]
Shea, you've landed on the White Cliffs of Dover.
Why it gotta be white?
Well, there you go.
Yeah, go, Monét.
Oh.
What?
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
The Emerald Isle of Ireland.
Erin go bragh.
Big money, big money--oh!
The black sand beach of Hawaii.
Oh, just a gesture of a spin.
Oh.
[screaming]
The Golden Pagoda in Yangon, Myanmar.
Okay.
-Oh. -Oh.
Stop it!
Ding, ding, ding!
[cheers and applause]
$500.
Take another spin, Yvie Oddly.
Aah!
[laughs]
Oh, wait.
-No! -What? [laughs]
Oh, you fucking bitch!
-Oh! -Oh!
No! No! No!
I'm so geeked.
I feel like a kid who got their allowance.
Now, Yvie, you should know,
there is a bankrupt on the wheel.
Gag.
Let's do it.
-Oh, my gosh. -All right.
What's it gonna be?
No! Don't you dare!
[all scream]
No!
[all laugh]
Bankrupt, bitch! [laughs]
I don't give a shit what color I get.
I just want some goddamn cash.
[laughs]
Please!
Come on, bitch.
Oh, is it gonna be big money, big money?
-No! -Big money, big money?
[cheering]
That's right, Vivienne, you have won $1,000.
Yay!
Spin carefully.
Give her a color. Give her a color.
Oh!
[laughs] $500 to The Vivienne.
♪ Ah
With the exchange rate, I don't know how much it is,
but I don't care.
I've got some money.
Now, just don't get that bankrupt.
Ooh!
[cheering]
You've landed on the Great Blue Hole in Belize.
Any hole is a goal.
[all laugh]
Okay, I'm gonna try to end this game.
Okay. [all laugh]
Oh. Oh, okay.
[screaming and laughter]
All right, Trinity, back of the line.
[all laugh]
Here we go, Yvie.
Round and round it goes.
Is it gonna be pink?
[cheers and applause]
You have landed on The Pink City in Jaipur, India.
Now, Trinity, con-drag-ulations, comrade.
You've got the Red Square of Moscow, Russia.
And just so you know, I love red.
[laughs]
Okay, ladies, feel free
to use the sewing machines provided by Singer.
Werk.
Racers, start your engines,
and may the best legend win.
[cheering]
Aah!
Ooh!
Oh, these are cute.
Ooh, this one is good.
This week's maxi-challenge is the Realness of Fortune Ball.
This is pretty.
Where we have to serve three looks on the runway:
Vanna White Realness, Before and After,
and the Realness of Fortune Eleganza.
I'm getting comfy.
Yeah, girl. [laughs]
My plan is simple.
Make something that I know is gonna look good on me,
a classic silhouette.
I am not gonna use this opportunity
to sit and experiment
and try something crazy that I've never done before.
However, I don't usually wear blue, so that's a risk.
[laughs]
Someone's sewing already?
Trinity, can you keep it down, please?
I want a fucking star now!
I wouldn't call myself no Gianni Versace, honey,
but girl, she has a few tricks up her sleeve.
Or her tuck.
[chuckles]
You can't rush a ruffle.
You should try.
[laughs] I really need to.
Honestly, I have not made anything since Season 10.
The last thing I made was the sponge dress.
This could be my redeeming moment for the sponge dress.
That dress is never gonna get redeemed ever.
[laughs]
Ugh!
Raja, what are you breaking over there, a hip?
This is what the fabric came on.
Oh, werk.
You are a crafty bitch.
I'm not gonna say what I'm doing with it yet.
Maybe gonna sit on it?
That's not a bad idea.
I definitely feel pressure in this challenge
because this is something
that fans might recognize as my strength.
Raja knows how to make some shit, out of nothing.
My design is kind of ambitious, so--
It really is,
and it will be amazing if you can do it.
If I can do it, and we'll see.
When I'm creating, typically I'm at home.
There's a taxiderm peacock.
I usually have a goblet of cold white wine in my hand
and a kaftan and I luxuriate in the process.
You know what would make this feel like home right now
is a fat-ass blunt and two bottles of wine.
But I'm not at home.
It's not fun
unless there's a little bit of panic and worry, I guess.
I don't know.
I just don't like to be rushed.
Why do I have to do anything fast?
Ugh.
I'm just gonna keep going,
I'm gonna keep going, I'm gonna keep going.
Nothing happened. Okay.
[laughs]
Jinkx. [laughs]
It came unthreaded somehow.
I don't know what I did.
The Realness of Fortune Ball.
You know who's not excited about doing a ball?
Tch.
Huh.
There are some legitimate fashion icons
and bona-fide seamstresses in this room,
and I am not one of them.
Mama doesn't sew.
Welp, we're not gonna be using a sewing machine today, ladies.
[laughs]
Jinkx, now, if you had known
that this challenge was coming up,
would that have affected your decision on who you blocked?
No. I think I really lucked out, huh?
You know, at least I blocked one of the sewers.
Okay.
If I had four blocks,
there's four people I could have blocked. [laughs]
Like, there's too many good seamstresses here.
I'm not thinking I'm gonna be in the top two
with anything I could create.
What I want is for the judges to go, "Jinkx,
"it looks like a dress and you're wearing it
and you made it," you know?
Well, that's a big goal.
[all laugh]
Bitch, they over there sketching and things.
She over there thinking real hard, bitch.
[laughs]
Typically when we think of white, we think bridal,
and I've already done bridal for a design challenge.
-I love the sketch. -Thanks.
I want more of a fantasy,
and I just don't know what the fantasy is.
I wanna think outside of the box and create something different,
so I'm going through sketch after sketch...
Trying to land on something
that will make the judges go wow.
But it's proving to be quite difficult.
[RuPaul laughs, bell dings]
[RuPaul laughs]
Oh, I've done the stretch the wrong way. Aah!
[Yvie laughs]
Welcome to the design challenge.
Hey, ladies!
-Hey! -Hi, Ru!
Hi, Jinkxy, come on over.
Oh, hello.
Hi, Jinkx. You've got your legendary Legend pin.
I sure do.
Why did you choose Shea
to receive the platinum plunger?
I thought I gotta make sure
someone who already has a star doesn't get a second star
before I get my second star.
I love that strategy.
Now, in the years since you've been here,
have your sewing skills improved or--
-Not a bit, no. -Not a bit.
But I'm very good at braiding.
Uh-huh. [both laugh]
If I braid a dress,
I don't have to worry about my sewing skills.
I mean, this looks better than what it is,
which is three strips of fabric that I hastily cut.
-Sure. Yeah, yeah. -I hope this works,
because otherwise I'm gonna end up
just dipping myself in honey
and rolling around in the fabric
and hoping for the best.
So now you got green.
Yeah, yeah. I want to be seen in green, RuPaul.
Oh, my goodness.
What are you planning for tomorrow's ball?
I would have loved to live in the seventies,
like, the love, the drugs, the sex,
it would have been fabulous.
It was fabulous. It was gorgeous.
So you're gonna do a seventies look?
Yes.
Okay, good.
So, now, the first week you were in the top two,
but you haven't been given the plunger.
Why do you think you haven't been given the plunger?
Ru, that is for you and me to talk
at a Tic-Tac lunch after the show.
[laughs] Okay.
Because this season, I'm coming with strategy, Ru.
This is Drag Race Survivor.
-Well, keep it going. -Yeah.
Jaida Essence Hall, I love all these different textures.
Texture is a way to break up black
and make it something new and fun.
That is gorgeous, and that is Jaida Essence Hall.
Now, do you think you can pull that off?
That is the question of the day.
Okay.
I think that I'm taking on a lot,
but I am confident that I can do it.
Almost every single thing that I wore on Season 12
I made myself.
Wow. Now, if you can pull that outfit off,
this is gonna be fantastic.
Make this challenge the one
where you get your legendary Legend Star.
Okay! Thank you. Yeah, I'm excited.
Last week I was surprised by that Boogieman.
Boo!
I was surprised how sexy he was.
I was going for spooky, but somehow I turned it sexy.
It was a huge hit.
We usually see you go for the creepy, weird, avant-garday.
-Avant-gardee. -Eee.
Is that what you're doing with your design?
So I got pink, and I think pink
is a really, like, frilly, girly, like, ooh, color,
and I want to still capture some of that, but make it punk.
So I'm thinking of doing, like,
a pink mesh bodysuit from head to toe.
And not tuck.
And not tuck a bit.
-Uh-huh. -[laughs]
My interpretation of pink is probably not going to be
the pretty, pink, pleasing picture
that people...portray.
Ah, I did it!
Jaida, you're so quiet.
Bitch, I'm trying to get a fucking star, bitch.
[both laugh]
Okay? Imma shut up today, bitch.
I am choosing to take a very difficult route
by making this look from a lot of tiny pieces.
Bitch, I'm like edited.
Maybe I'm being too ambitious, ho.
Maybe I have bitten off more than I can chew,
but I have to step it up and get this done,
because this is a competition full of legends, baby,
and I did not come here for my legacy to be shaken.
It should be bacon.
I like bacon.
-Yeah. -Something like layer,
like, some of that one, and then do some of this one.
I love it.
And then do some more of the other one, like--
-Just like different chains. -Uh-huh, yes, yes.
All of this, all of this, all of this.
All of it, all of this, all of that, all of this, all of that.
All of it, all of it, all of it.
Whew, bitch.
-Whew. -Let me get to work, bitch. Bye.
-Monét, that's turning out cute. -Thank you.
This week's challenge is the Realness of Fortune Ball,
and in these design challenges,
you need to know how to sell your garment,
and I know I can do that with this look for sure.
Whoa, you see that little
mint chocolate chip booty over there?
[Monét laughs]
Monét, please answer the age-old question.
-Oh, God. -What that booty do?
Y'all think her ass is the biggest thing on her body,
look at her shoulders.
[all laugh]
Shut the fuck up.
I love my booty.
Y'all got your skinny legends, baby.
I'm a thicc icon, okay?
Small waist and big talent.
Ooh, that's my tagline: small waist, big talent.
Yes. Ooh, that's good.
Oh, Shea!
-Here comes the bride. -Right.
You know, I was telling myself I wasn't gonna go bridal, but--
When life hands you white...
-[laughs] -Right.
The materials are leading me in this direction.
I can't fight it, so I'm doing gorgeous bridal couture.
♪ Here comes the bride
♪ She is...
White.
What did you call me?
What if all of a sudden you said that
and people started really thinking that I was white,
and then my credit score went up outta nowhere?
Oh, my gosh.
I wish somebody would say it about me.
[both laugh]
Trinity, so if you're not good at math,
how are you so good at sewing?
Um, I guess a lot.
[both laugh]
Once I get past these straps,
the rest of this will go pretty fast, I think.
I have been working this tuck to the bone,
and I feel good, bitch.
Werk, Trinity.
Girl, like, you've whipped out
a full on, finished drag queen "look at my cutouts."
I'm pretty fast.
I hate you so much for it, I want you to know.
She's such a bitch.
It would be, like, really sad
if somebody, like, accidentally put an iron on that
and melted it or something.
[all laugh] Oh, my God.
Oh, look, an iron.
[all laugh]
Oh, I did it!
There's a whole-ass seam.
Is that your first seam?
It feels like it.
What if I go this way?
It almost looks like a big--like a--
like a vagina opening up.
Yes, labia majora and labia minora.
It could also be a testicle.
-Oh, it could be a testicle! -It could be a testicle!
I look around the room,
and everyone's having fun and laughing
and able to pretty much figure everything out with their look.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm sitting over here in Glue Town, USA,
population Jinkx. [chuckles]
-Jinkx? -Huh?
-How you doing? -Mm.
Do you need help?
I--you know.
Where are you at? What are we doing?
I'm just not feeling it anymore.
I mean, I came this close to just ripping everything up.
But, yeah, that's where I'm at.
I hate it, and I don't think I have time
to do something different.
When I started working on my dress,
I had a very clear vision,
and I actually thought I was handling it.
We can add another little piece up underneath it.
And then I took one big step back
and I realized I hated my dress.
Right now I just wanna get a front and back to this.
I hate it, and I hate hating it.
Okay. Hot glue.
Make sure that this seam--
-Mm-hmm, is folded in. -Well, yeah. There you go.
It looks like one big mess of rhinestones and tulle.
[laughs]
But sweet, darling Trinity
is trying to make me feel better, you know?
Bless her heart. [laughs]
Oh, I hate my dress.
[all laugh]
[cries]
[RuPaul laughs, bell dings]
[RuPaul laughs]
Good morning.
It's a new day!
Ready to have a ball.
Category is fashion?
[all laugh]
Today we present the Realness of Fortune Ball.
I got a star, I got a dress.
You just need a nap, you know.
-Yeah, I need a nap. -You need a nap.
I am feeling two thirds confident
because we have three looks to present,
and two of them are stellar
and one I made myself.
Yeah, give it to mama.
Did you sign a consent form?
-Oh! Oh! -[laughs]
Well, that woke me up.
What in bloody hell?
I think my British accent's getting better. I mean--
Is it? [all laugh]
Today is going to be a day, girl.
How's it going over here?
Good, good, good.
I had to redo this because it was a little long,
and I know you're gonna think I'm delusional,
but I really think
I'm about to sell the fuck out this outfit.
Yeah, you better werk, bitch.
I really believe in this outfit.
So we still got each other's back?
Same.
Yes, yes.
There is still an alliance between the Twinners
to not block each other.
I won't.
-Oh, uh-huh. -laughs]
But y'all know I am here to play Drag Race Survivor,
so I'm thinking about all the things,
all the moving pieces.
And I feel like Trinity and I
need to rope more people into the alliance.
-Jinkx! -Yes, Mother?
What's the alliance talking about?
[all laugh] Oh, my God.
No, you're in this conversation.
What have you got going on?
This is a fucking game, bitch.
I don't know.
I mean, it's so tempting, but--
It's a smart move.
Is it, though?
-Yes! -Yes!
And this alliance just means we will never block each other?
-That's it. That's all. -You got it. That's it.
The idea of alliances gives me reservations,
because if I were to team up with someone
and have to be worrying about what their goals are,
then maybe I'm not focusing on my own.
But imagine being in, like, that hard spot
where it's, like, one of us
is the clear person who should get blocked,
and it would be silly
not to block the person who has the most stars?
The Twinners could be entering a three-legged race
that they're not gonna win.
[laughs]
I don't think I can be in an alliance,
but I will say you were very helpful,
and I will remember that the next time I'm on top.
You've been my, like, sister I confide in.
So I'm not gonna just go blocking y'all willy-nilly,
but I don't know if I can, like, sign a devil's deal
-this early in the competition. -Bitch, I want your firstborn.
I want a blood oath.
I need the contract!
[both laugh]
-I think we have our answer. -Yeah.
Yeah, werk.
Miss Jinkx, I know what she's doing.
She has plans.
I have no idea what those plans are.
Well, listen--
-Twinner. -Twinner.
Twinner, Twinner, Twinner.
Twinner, Twinner, two chicken dinners.
[laughs]
So even though certain people have blocked me,
I'm willing to let bygones be bygones.
And I'm just checking in to see...
That's a strong alliance.
Oh, the three of us.
Okay, so then what are we just agreeing to, then?
-We just won't block each other? -Yeah, that's it.
That everybody else is fair game?
Yeah.
Like, you and I are the only two out of the three of us
that have experienced the blocking experience.
So my thing is
I feel like it really only benefits Monét in this moment,
so that's why I'm, like, hesitant.
Because she was the only one that has a legendary Legend Star
that hasn't been blocked.
What is it that Monét is guaranteeing us?
So I see what's happening.
Monét has a legendary Legend Star and no block.
So who do we think is next up on the chopping block?
She's trying to build a safety net.
I ain't walking into an alliance, am I?
No, come on. Come in here.
Actually, that's exactly what you're doing.
Oh. Oh.
Ugh. A secret alliance ain't secret
if everybody knows about it, sweetie.
People are having conversations
about, you know, who not to block, so--
Oh.
Have you talked with anybody about an alliance?
About who not to block?
I have not thought about any of that.
-And, like, this is very, like-- -This is a strategy game.
Yeah, I know, but, like, I haven't thought about that.
And, like, now, like, maybe I might have to just--
The way to win the game is strategy.
-Yeah. -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mm. Well, that's something to think about.
It's a lot to think about.
But we need to get ready.
Get yo motherfucking ducks in a row.
-[laughs] -Yes, ma'am.
Wow, okay, tea.
I feel bamboozled.
I'm bewildered and beguiled
by the fact that alliances are forming.
Maybe I need one,
but I'm not trying to get into no, like, back corner drag gang
or none of that.
Just so you know, Shea is not on board.
-She's not? -Not completely.
[RuPaul laughs]
♪ Cover girl, put the bass in your walk ♪
♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪
♪ Cover girl
And what?
Welcome to the main stage
of RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, All Winners.
Michelle Visage, are you ready to play our game?
Just call me Spinderella.
-How about I don't? -Okay.
[all laugh]
Style superstar Carson Kressley, have you ever bought a vowel?
No, but I have paid for sex.
Therapy. Therapy. I'm cured!
[laughs]
And our extra-special guest judge,
the fabulous Kirby Howell-Baptiste.
I'm so happy you're here.
Now, I wanted to ask you, why do women kill?
You know, I don't know,
but I would kill to look as good as you, Ru.
[laughs]
You're so lovely.
Thank you.
This week we challenged our All Stars
to serve three prize-winning looks
at the Realness of Fortune Ball.
Racers, start your engines,
and may the best legend win.
Welcome, children,
to the Realness of Fortune Ball.
Category is Vanna White Realness.
[all laugh]
Michelle: Yay!
[applause]
-Amazing! -Wow!
Vanna: I can't believe I'm walking the runway
onRuPaul's Drag Race.
I'm serving Vanna White Realness in black sequins.
I hope Michelle thinks I'm "eloguent."
-Yeah! -Beautiful!
Hello.
Vanna White, what are you doing here?
You can't do Vanna White Realness without me.
-My goodness, you look gorgeous. -Stunning.
10s, 10s, 10s across the board.
Yes!
-Oh, thank you. -I gotta tell you,
I am a huge fan of America's game.
Now, would you like to give Drag Racea spin?
I would be honored.
Category is Vanna White Realness.
First up, Jinkx Monsoon.
[gasps and laughs]
[all laugh]
Jinkx: Oh, my God, that's Vanna White,
and she's wearing black.
This queen stole my look!
Black isn't the first color you think
when you think Vanna White,
so thank you for doing me that solid, Vanna.
Carson: Come up and buy a vowel sometime.
Michelle: Yes.
Vanna: Shea Couleé.
[gasps]
Shea: Oh!
I'm serving dipped-in-chocolate Vanna White realness.
I just feel so serene and classic.
RuPaul: I'd like to solve the puzzle. Gorgeous.
[all laugh]
Vanna: Monét X Change.
Oh! [all laugh]
-You are stunning, Vanna! -You are!
Monét: I'm serving you sexy, thicc icon Vanna White.
I have this high, high, high slit,
and I think she looks fabulous.
Carson: Oh, I ran into Monét.
She says "thigh."
[all laugh]
Vanna: Jaida Essence Hall.
[gasps and laughs]
Jaida: Vanna White is probably the first white lady
that has ever been in my household.
Ding, ding!
That's good.
We watched her every single day,
and so I know exactly how to serve her
like nobody else's business.
Would you like to solve my puzzle?
Ooh! [laughs]
Vanna: Raja.
Oh, my fucking God.
[all laugh]
Raja: I would sit with my grandmother,
and we would watch Wheel of Fortune together.
I'm sure wherever she's watching from in another realm,
that she's really quite proud of me
in my almost exact Vanna look.
I think she's coming for my job.
[all laugh]
Vanna: Yvie Oddly.
RuPaul: Ooh!
Michelle: She is ginged for the gods.
Yvie: The category is Vanna White Realness,
and this is my interpretation.
I never wear wigs this big,
and I feel like the most gorgeous bitch
in this whole studio.
[all laugh]
We're twins!
Kirby: Ginger? I hardly even know her.
Vanna: The Vivienne.
Carson: Crushing the velvet.
Oh, hi, me!
How are you? [all laugh]
We've never looked better.
Vivienne: My Vanna White realness
is this stunning, peachy velvet number.
I just feel gorgeous.
Vanna: A-E-I-O you look fabulous.
Trinity the Tuck.
Aah!
[all laugh]
Trinity: Miss Vanna White
is the only pageant queen on the TV.
RuPaul: Wow.
Michelle: Wheel of sparkle.
Beautiful.
Girl, I have so many rhinestones on this dress,
she weighs a ton.
This hair is back-teased to the 1980s.
Carson: I own all of Merv Griffin Productions.
[RuPaul laughs]
Category is Before and After.
Up first, Jinkx Monsoon
serving What Ever Happened to Baby Jane Fonda?
[all laugh]
Jinkx: I took Jane Fonda as Barbarella,
mixed her with Bette Davis as Baby Jane
to create my favorite look ever.
Carson: I'm really Fonda this.
[RuPaul laughs]
Vanna: Shea Couleé serving Gold Tooth Fairy.
Carson: She's coming for your crown.
Michelle: Girl, you better watch it.
Shea: I got the attitude.
Like, you don't wanna run into this fairy
in a dark alley.
She got her little wrench,
and she is gonna come and repossess those gold teeth,
because you've been late on your payments.
Carson: Takes a licking, but keeps on...
ticking. [all laugh]
Vanna: Monét X Change
serving Bob the Drag Queen Elizabeth.
RuPaul: She's coming straight from Tuckingham Palace.
[all laugh]
Monét: I'm doing Bob's
iconic neon paint drip look reimagined.
It's a very Queen Elizabeth silhouette
with a Bob the Drag Queen twist.
Michelle: I walk into the palace purse first.
RuPaul: Uh-huh.
Vanna: Jaida Essence Hall serving Bag Lady In Red.
[all laugh]
Jaida: I am giving you a demure lady,
strolling through the park, feeling like a rich bitch.
Kirby: She seems like she has a little baggage.
I have my bags attached to this beautiful structured gown,
with some delicious snacks.
Is that a Twizzler in your turban,
or are you just happy to see us?
[all laugh]
Vanna: Raja serving Olivia Newton-John Waters.
-Ooh! -[laughs]
Raja: I have chosen a look
that Olivia Newton-John is most iconic for:
the Sandy look inGrease,
combining that with John Waters' pencil-thin moustache.
Michelle: She's bouncing a lot.
I wonder if she has to Xanadoo-doo.
[all laugh]
Vanna: Yvie Oddly serving Cardi B. Arthur.
Carson: Oh, wow. [all laugh]
Yvie: Bea Arthur is not having it.
Once I pop my jacket open
and whip my hair off, I am Cardi B.
The "B" obviously stands for "boobs."
Tits out, tongue out, ass out, letting it all hang out.
RuPaul: She loves cheesecake and wet-ass pussy.
Vanna: The Vivienne serving Princess Diana Ross.
-Ooh! -Ooh!
Vivienne: This is Diana's classic suit
with an eighties disco twist.
The hair is huge, giving Diana Ross at the Super Bowl.
Michelle: The Supreme queen.
RuPaul: Yeah.
Vanna: Trinity the Tuck serving RuPaul Charles II.
Oh, dear. [all laugh]
RuPaul: Look at those knickers!
[all laugh]
Trinity: Girl, I am giving you some histrah:
RuPaul mixed with Charles II,
some king from overseas, bitch.
I don't know. He just was a dandy,
whatever that means.
Carson: She's going for baroque.
RuPaul: Yeah.
Category is Realness of Fortune Eleganza.
Inspired by the lavender fields of Provence,
it's Jinkx Monsoon.
Come on, Purple Rain.
Jinkx: This is pretty.
It's held together with hot glue and a prayer,
but if I were in a Greek tragedy
playing the goddess Athena, you'd buy that.
Community theater, maybe, but still.
RuPaul: I think she's gonna Mount Olympus.
[Carson laughs]
Inspired by the White Cliffs of Dover,
it's Shea Couleé.
Michelle: I definitely do.
Shea: I'm giving you Marie Laveau at her wedding.
New Orleans, it's humid,
so I gotta put my hair up in this gorgeous turban
and just drape my veil so elegantly over it.
RuPaul: I now pronounce you stunning.
Inspired by the green Emerald Isle of Ireland,
it's Monét X Change.
-Ooh-ah, ooh-ah! -Ooh!
Michelle: Harem? I don't even know him!
Monét: I'm serving you Irish disco fantasy diva.
The afro is right, the jewelry is right.
Baby, don't be jealous of my booty--I mean, beauty.
RuPaul: She's just now getting home
from Studio 50-whore.
[Kirby laughs]
Inspired by Hawaii's black sand beach,
it's Jaida Essence Hall.
Carson: Someone's been eating crow.
RuPaul: Yes.
Jaida: I am really feeling
this super-edgy, fantastical fantasy.
I am punishing the runway,
and I feel like a sickening, dark superhero.
Kirby: That's so Raven.
[Carson laughs]
Inspired by the Golden Pagoda in Myanmar,
it's Raja.
Michelle: Oh, Ru, I bet she can't wait
to see how this turns out.
RuPaul: Yes.
Raja: Fuck, I look great!
It is gold on gold on gold on gold.
Golden goddess.
She obviously is Miss Universe representing Myanmar.
For fuck's sake, I'd give myself a shoot.
Kirby: You know, we should just sleeve her alone.
[RuPaul laughs]
Inspired by The Pink City of Jaipur, India,
it's Yvie Oddly.
Kirby: Yvie Oddly, very cape-able.
RuPaul: Yes.
Yvie: I'm serving my best editorial ghost.
I've got this dramatic cape,
and I am flinging her everywhere.
I want the judges to look at me
and be, like, what is this monster?
[laughs]
RuPaul: You've heard of two in the pink?
Well, she got all three in the pink.
Kirby: Mm-hmm.
Inspired by the Great Blue Hole of Belize,
it's The Vivienne.
Michelle: Turquoise brings all the boys.
Vivienne: I feel like $800 million.
This dress is hugging my figure in every right place.
RuPaul is looking me up and down,
and I know she wants to wear this.
Gorgeous.
-Yes. -Yeah.
Inspired by Red Square in Moscow,
it's Trinity the Tuck.
Carson: It's the latext in fashion.
Trinity: I am giving you
the only dominatrix fantasy realness,
with a mask and long hair all in red.
Girl, I'm about to whup somebody's ass
with this little--
What is it called?
I don't know what they're called.
She is heating up the runway.
-Ooh! -Ooh!
Michelle: Guys, it's cracked!
Carson: Crack kills.
[laughs]
So, Vanna, can you stay?
I'd love to, Ru,
but I have to go to the mall with Pat Sajak
to buy some vowels.
Oh, yes.
So I'll see you later, okay?
Yeah, no, I totally understand.
Thank you, Vanna.
Thank you so much. It was so much fun. Bye.
Yay, Vanna White. [applause]
[RuPaul laughs, bell dings]
[RuPaul laughs]
Welcome, queens.
Tonight, I'll name the top two All Stars of the week
and award each of them a legendary Legend Star,
unless she has been blocked.
Now it's time for the judges' critiques,
starting with Jinkx Monsoon.
So let's start with your Vanna White look.
To me, it was a little more old Hollywood
in the 1930s and the 1940s.
But I gotta tell you,
I don't think I've ever seen you look more glamorous.
[laughs]
Your Whatever Happened to Baby Jane Fonda was just genius.
I agree.
Also, it was really nice to see your body,
because you have a great body, and you looked amazing.
And this one, you actually did a good job putting it together
and the way you roped it and made it kind of Grecian.
The color looks pretty on you.
I think you did a decent job
knowing that you're no seamstress.
But I have to say Trinity took some time to just help me
so I could come out here and not feel like Boo Boo the Fool.
Watch out, because this is my one weakness, y'all.
[all laugh]
Up next, Shea Couleé.
Hi.
So your Vanna White Realness was that beautiful pink gown.
I was getting a little more Audrey Hepburn
than I was Vanna,
but the gown was stunning and you looked beautiful.
Didn't give me Vanna White,
but I kind of didn't care because it was so gorgeous.
And then the second look, I totally got the story
of this hustler Gold Tooth Fairy who'd take your stuff, pawn it.
I thought it was wicked.
And then the way this is constructed,
I mean, creating a boned corset
in, like, however many hours you had, unbelievable.
To me, this look
is the definition of, like, for the culture.
Like, the head wrap is showing how beautiful, how classy,
how innovative it is and we are.
Yeah, very smart.
And actually, all of your looks were absolutely gorgeous.
Really, really well done.
Thank you, Shea.
Thank you, Ru.
Up next, Monét X Change.
-Yes! -Whoo, whoo!
Vanna White, you were giving us
kind of Wheel of Fortune after dark, you know?
[all laugh] It was, like, a little bit--
It was way sluttier than Vanna would ever do,
and I appreciate that.
Your Bob the Drag Queen Elizabeth,
the funniest moment to me was, yes, the purse first,
but you did that kind of purse first.
That's very funny and very smart.
This look is very you.
It's fun, it's celebratory.
I mean, you gave us that cold shoulder,
you gave us a cold leg, which I've never seen before.
My favorite color. Money and weed.
[all laugh] Yes!
Up next, Jaida Essence Hall.
Jaida, you don't disappoint.
Your Vanna White, you looked beautiful,
the outfit was lovely, the hair was gorgeous.
Your Before and After was really smart.
Bag Lady in Red. Who would have thought
to incorporate backpacks into a skirt?
Not me.
You invented the new cargo pant!
And then this is incredible.
Like, the details on this
and the workmanship are really fantastic.
Boy, is it a home run.
It's really, really gorgeous.
What I love about it is it also has this volcanic aspect to it.
It's gorgeous. I wish I could wear that.
I should wear that. Gimme that, gimme that.
[all laugh]
-Up next, Raja. -Hi.
When I saw you turn the corner as Vanna...
I was, like, can I buy an O, an M, and a G?
Because it was so good.
I loved the Vanna White Realness.
For me, that was instantly recognizable.
Your Olivia Newton-John Waters,
I definitely think you could have gone further with John.
I couldn't see the moustache.
I was even using my bifocals,
and I was, like, I still couldn't see it.
So I needed more John.
This look, it is spectacular.
It's too much in the very best possible way.
Stun-ning.
So gorgeous.
How you did the flounciness and the pleating
and the collar with the sleeves,
-this is, like, gobsmacking. -Thank you.
Up next, Yvie Oddly.
Hi-ho!
So Vanna White Realness,
I love green and red hair together.
It's a beautiful combination.
I really didn't get Vanna White,
but I did like what it was.
And the Cardi B. Arthur,
I mean, come on, that is so stupid.
-[laughs] -I love that.
I mean, just saying those words together is funny.
I thought that was really well done.
Cardi B. does the whole tongue out thing.
Like, the tongue and a bit of ass,
straightaway I know that's Cardi B.
This look, it's kind of like
a deconstructed kind of punk vibe to me.
Sometimes people just think punk has to be black
and it has to be aggressive,
and I like that there was a little bit of softness.
To make pink edgy is a skill. I like this pink.
I think it's really cool.
-Thank you. -Thank you.
Up next, The Vivienne.
Hi!
This dress is so gorgeous, and you love it, don't you?
Yeah, I do. Aah!
[all laugh]
So beautiful.
You look incredible.
And the fact that you, you know,
whipped this up for this challenge
is mind boggling to me.
RuPaul could wear this.
It's just really, really beautiful.
And your Vanna White Realness, it wasn't super, super Vanna,
but I was in love with it because it was so beautiful.
And then your Princess Diana Ross,
what I loved was coming out and being Lady Di
and being very shy,
and then breaking into the sort of celebratory moment.
That to me felt really Diana,
and I thought that was really special,
and to me, quite sentimental.
Thank you.
Up next, Trinity the Tuck.
I loved that Vanna White Realness.
You were selling it really, really well
You were keeping it Wheel, okay?
Because it was the essence of Vanna White.
It was gorgeous, it was opulent.
I loved that outfit.
RuPaul Charles II.
Who the fuck knows who Charles II is?
I Googled him. I know everything!
He was a king!
I really loved what you did with it.
I think you presented it really well.
This is really amazing.
You know how to do you so well.
You look kind of like a sexy superhero.
Those cutouts look like they were done by a laser machine.
How did you get the symmetry so perfect?
Somehow math was involved.
Math?
I think that they have it in some educational systems.
But in Alabama, you only learned about King Charles.
Yep. [all laugh]
-The second. -The second, bitch.
[all laugh]
Thank you, ladies. I think we've heard enough.
While you untuck in the werkroom,
the judges and I will deliberate.
You may leave the stage.
All right, now, just between us squirrel friends,
what do you think?
Now, we have to pick our top two queens,
which isn't very easy tonight.
For me, it's definitely Jaida Essence Hall and Shea.
Y'all, Jaida came to slay tonight.
She came out swinging.
That Vanna White Realness look was fantastic.
The best part about it was the stupid faces she was making
when she was presenting it.
Her Before and After,
Bag Lady in Red, how smart was that?
When I heard that, I was, like, mm,
she's gonna do, like, a bag lady, like, on the street.
-Right, right. -And then she gave us
this quilted, chic ball skirt with backpacks.
Her Realness of Fortune, that, to me,
was one of my favorite looks of the whole night.
It was dark, it was sexy, and a little bit goth,
but not on the nose.
I think she absolutely smashed it.
But also, Shea is really here to play this game.
Her Gold Tooth Fairy was fantastic.
I love the tongue-in-cheekness of it.
It was current, it felt like now, and I--
-It's timely. -[laughs]
Very timely with the watches. Thank you, Carson.
That bridal gown that she made herself was so beautiful.
You know, when you think about the way they end fashion shows
with the bridal look, that was very that.
It was so smart,
the way she had the veil sort of knotted,
and it was brilliant.
Shea is really, I think,
one of the strongest fashion girls in the competition.
I want her to be in the top.
I'm a little torn about that Vanna look.
And then Raja
was really one of the top performances of the night.
That Vanna White Realness look, every detail, perfect.
The hair, the makeup, stunning.
The Realness of Fortune look,
it looks like a fashion illustration,
just those over-the-top ruffles.
The waist is too little and the shoulders are too big,
and it's a fantasy.
That was, like, cha-cha Liberace,
more is more.
I absolutely loved it.
But her Before and After Olivia Newton-John Waters
was 99% bad Sandy and 1% John Waters.
I will say this.
I'm completely impressed
by what Trinity did tonight, every look.
Realness of Fortune, that was incredible.
Dominatrix, sexy red dress.
I feel like that would take professional seamstresses
over a week to make.
I don't know how she whipped that out.
-She made her own riding crop. -Mm-hmm.
Trinity's Vanna White Realness,
that gown I could totally see on Vanna.
-Yes. -So I really enjoyed that.
But if you're gonna play RuPaul Charles,
why would you not do RuPaul Charles Nelson Reilly?
You could come out with RuPaul hair, an ascot.
Yeah, it was a stretch,
but again, she sold it so well,
and it was so clean, it was so polished.
I guess RuPaul Charles Manson was off the table.
-[laughs] -Oh!
That would have been funny, though!
All right, silence.
I've made my decision.
Bring back my legends.
-Where they at? -Get 'em back.
Welcome back, ladies.
Based on your Realness of Fortune runway presentations,
I've made some decisions.
The top two All Stars of the week are...
Trinity the Tuck...
Oh!
And Jaida Essence Hall.
[applause]
Con-drag-ulations.
You've each earned a legendary Legend Star.
And you are both one step closer
to the grand finale
Lip Sync Lalaparuza Smackdown for the crown.
Ladies, the rest of you may take a seat.
Well, shit.
Two legends stand before me.
Trinity and Jaida,
this is your chance to impress me,
win $10,000,
and earn the power
to block one of your fellow queens
from receiving a legendary Legend Star next week.
The time has come... [thunder]
for you to lip sync...
[echoing] for your legacy!
Good luck, and don't fuck it up.
♪ Give it to mama
♪ Give it, give it
♪ Give it to mama, mama
♪ Give it
♪ Give it to mama, mama
♪ For some strange reason ♪
♪ You done pleasin' me, like it's okay ♪
♪ Like a perm that's been left too long, it starts to burn ♪
♪ The result is it just won't take ♪
♪ So if you want to
♪ You got the green light, uh-huh, uh, uh ♪
♪ So if you want to, uh-huh, uh, uh ♪
♪ You got the green light, uh-huh, uh, uh ♪
♪ Go, go, go
♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
♪ Go, go, go
♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
♪ Go, go, go
♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
♪ Go, go, red light
♪ Ahh, green light
♪ I gave all I could give
♪ My love
♪ My heart
♪ Now we're facing the end
♪ From what you did from the start ♪
♪ My love
[all laugh]
[trombone solo]
[all laugh]
♪ You're holdin' up traffic, green means go ♪
♪ Go
♪ Go, go
♪ Go
♪ Green light
[cheers and applause]
That's how you do it, bitch!
Get them both $10,000.
Yes!
Ladies, I've made my decision.
Jaida Essence Hall, con-drag-ulations.
You're a winner, baby.
And you've earned a cash tip of $10,000.
[all laugh]
Can I borrow a 20?
I'll give you two,
and you ain't gotta pay it back. [laughs]
Trinity the Tuck, you are free to slay another day.
You may step to the back of the stage.
I got my star!
[cheers and applause]
Queens, please join Jaida on the main stage.
Jaida Essence Hall,
with great power comes great responsibility.
Using the platinum plunger...
Show us which queen you've chosen to block.
Look, y'all, I don't wanna think too hard about strategy,
because I'll confuse myself.
That's a real fact.
But at the same time,
the name of the game is making it to the top four
and getting that $200,000.
So if I gotta block a bitch, I'll do it.
You have a nice back.
That's what he said.
Pip-pip.
You look beautiful tonight.
Don't I?
[all chuckle]
Oh! [all laugh]
You know what?
I deserve this.
[all laugh]
Jinkx, next week, you can compete and even win,
but Jaida has blocked you from earning a legendary Legend Star.
[tongue pop]
Con-drag-ulations, ladies.
And remember, if you can't love yourself,
how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?
Can I get an "amen" up in here?
-Amen! -Amen!
All right. Now let the music play!
[music plays]
♪ Cover girl, put the bass in your walk ♪
♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪
[all laugh]
♪ Cover girl
RuPaul: Next time onAll Stars...
Everybody who has got a star has been blocked but this bitch.
There's five stars and two that have not been blocked.
Okay, bitch, now you getting too cute.
Too close for comfort!
For this week's maxi-challenge, you need to improv your way
through the enchanted TV court show Fairytale Justice.
[all laugh] Oh, no!
Order in the Fairytale Court!
She was howling in her pussy!
I have not drank since this morning, I swear.
[cries]
Everyone is so good, which is so, so annoying.
Bitch! [slap]
[RuPaul laughs, bell dings]
♪ Cover girl, put the bass in your walk ♪
♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪
♪ Cover girl