1
00:00:08,519 --> 00:00:09,886
JOE, EMILY, LET'S GO!

2
00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:11,455
COME ON! YOUR SISTER
CAN'T BE LATE!

3
00:00:11,488 --> 00:00:13,190
SHE'S GOT A FIELD TRIP
TO THE AQUARIUM.

4
00:00:13,224 --> 00:00:15,359
- YAY!
- YAY.

5
00:00:15,392 --> 00:00:18,129
DADDY, WANT TO HEAR
MY DOLPHIN VOICE AGAIN?

6
00:00:18,162 --> 00:00:20,597
[high-pitched squealing]

7
00:00:20,631 --> 00:00:22,233
BABY,
WE WORKED ON THIS.

8
00:00:22,266 --> 00:00:24,301
NOW IF YOU'RE GONNA GO
FULL DOLPHIN,

9
00:00:24,335 --> 00:00:28,105
YOU HAVE TO MODULATE WITH SHORT
STACCATO BREATHS, LIKE THIS.

10
00:00:28,139 --> 00:00:30,674
[authentic dolphin call]

11
00:00:30,707 --> 00:00:31,775
OKAY?

12
00:00:31,808 --> 00:00:34,445
I'LL NEVER BE AS GOOD
AS YOU, DADDY.

13
00:00:34,478 --> 00:00:36,180
YEAH, I KNOW, SWEETHEART.

14
00:00:36,213 --> 00:00:38,048
OKAY, GO TO THE LITTLE
DOLPHIN'S ROOM, OKAY?

15
00:00:38,081 --> 00:00:40,384
WE GOT A LONG
TRIP AHEAD OF US.

16
00:00:40,417 --> 00:00:42,553
DAD, I FINISHED MY
MIDTERM PROJECT ON ROCK HISTORY.

17
00:00:42,586 --> 00:00:45,389
WANT TO SEE?

18
00:00:45,422 --> 00:00:47,124
YEAH. OKAY, GOOD.
NICE JOB.

19
00:00:47,158 --> 00:00:48,792
YEAH, IT'S NICE,
BUT NOT GREAT.

20
00:00:48,825 --> 00:00:51,628
I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT.
I SHOULD'VE USED MORE GEODES.

21
00:00:51,662 --> 00:00:53,197
PLEASE.
LET ME REPHRASE IT, JOE.

22
00:00:53,230 --> 00:00:55,566
I WILL LOVE IT IF YOU TAKE IT
OUT TO THE CAR NOW.

23
00:00:55,599 --> 00:00:57,268
PLEASE. GO. THANK YOU.

24
00:00:59,403 --> 00:01:03,207
NO, OLIVIA, THE ANIMAL MARCH
IS US MARCHING,

25
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:05,542
NOT ANIMALS MARCHING.

26
00:01:05,576 --> 00:01:07,178
EMILY, WE GOT TO GO.

27
00:01:07,178 --> 00:01:09,613
LIV, I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE
SIR MEOWS-A-LOT AT HOME.

28
00:01:09,646 --> 00:01:13,250
HAVE YOU SEEN HIM
IN HIS LITTLE PROTEST SWEATER?

29
00:01:13,284 --> 00:01:15,319
all: AWWW!

30
00:01:15,352 --> 00:01:16,853
NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! NO!
TAKE HIM HOME.

31
00:01:16,887 --> 00:01:18,222
EMILY, WE GOT TO GO.

32
00:01:18,255 --> 00:01:19,590
ALL RIGHT, I'LL MEET
YOU GUYS AT SCHOOL, OKAY?

33
00:01:19,623 --> 00:01:21,192
- ALL RIGHT.
- DAD, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

34
00:01:21,192 --> 00:01:23,327
WE GOT TO GO.

35
00:01:25,095 --> 00:01:26,297
OH, DAVID! WAIT!

36
00:01:26,330 --> 00:01:27,964
I NEED HELP
PICKING A HEAD SHOT

37
00:01:27,998 --> 00:01:29,233
FOR THE FAN CLUB MERCHANDISE.

38
00:01:29,266 --> 00:01:32,002
SO, "QUIRKY CHARMING" DAVID
IS SO HANDSOME,

39
00:01:32,035 --> 00:01:35,606
BUT "PENSIVE" DAVID
SEES RIGHT INTO MY SOUL.

40
00:01:35,639 --> 00:01:37,974
THEY'RE BOTH PERFECT.
IT'S ME.

41
00:01:38,008 --> 00:01:39,443
[laughing]
YOU'RE RIGHT.

42
00:01:39,476 --> 00:01:40,744
ALL RIGHT, WELL,
HAVE A GOOD TRIP.

43
00:01:40,777 --> 00:01:43,280
OH, NO. NOW, YOU KNOW THE RULE--
NO HUGS FOR DAY TRIPS.

44
00:01:43,314 --> 00:01:47,484
[sighs]
THAT'S SUCH A BOGUS RULE.

45
00:01:47,518 --> 00:01:49,353
OH, DAVID,
I'M GLAD I CAUGHT YOU.

46
00:01:49,386 --> 00:01:51,222
REMEMBER THAT BUDDY-COP MOVIE
I WROTE FOR YOU?

47
00:01:51,222 --> 00:01:53,224
YEAH, MARCUS, LET IT GO.
I'M NOT GONNA DO YOUR MOVIE,

48
00:01:53,224 --> 00:01:55,426
AND I'M SORRY IF THAT MEANS
IT DOESN'T GET MADE.

49
00:01:55,459 --> 00:01:57,994
WELL, THE STUDIO
DECIDED TO MAKE IT.

50
00:01:58,028 --> 00:02:00,364
REALLY? WITHOUT ME?

51
00:02:00,397 --> 00:02:01,398
YES, DAVID.

52
00:02:01,432 --> 00:02:03,567
DO THEY KNOW
IT'S WITHOUT ME?

53
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,370
YES, DAVID. WE SHOOT
IN FIVE WEEKS IN NEW YORK CITY.

54
00:02:06,403 --> 00:02:07,738
OH.

55
00:02:07,771 --> 00:02:11,742
WELL, CONGRATULATIONS, MARCUS.
I'M HAPPY FOR YOU.

56
00:02:11,775 --> 00:02:14,010
DAVID, I WANT YOU TO REMAIN
IN THAT HAPPY PLACE

57
00:02:14,044 --> 00:02:16,347
BECAUSE YOUR ROLE
WENT TO TED MCGINLEY.

58
00:02:16,380 --> 00:02:17,948
- REALLY?
- MM-HMM.

59
00:02:17,981 --> 00:02:19,850
LOOK, I KNOW YOU AND TED
HAVE BAD BLOOD,

60
00:02:19,883 --> 00:02:21,285
BUT SINCE OUR SHOW
WENT OFF THE AIR

61
00:02:21,318 --> 00:02:23,287
AND THEY BROUGHT
"TED PLUS TEN" BACK,

62
00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,422
IT'S NOW AMERICA'S
NUMBER-ONE SHOW.

63
00:02:25,456 --> 00:02:27,591
REALLY?

64
00:02:27,624 --> 00:02:30,126
THEY THINK THAT TED
COULD BE A MOVIE STAR.

65
00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,162
[high-pitched voice]
REALLY?

66
00:02:32,263 --> 00:02:34,565
OH, WELL,
GOOD FOR HIM, MARCUS.

67
00:02:34,598 --> 00:02:36,867
[screaming]
MY FOOT! MY FOOT!

68
00:02:36,900 --> 00:02:39,403
[screaming]
HER FOOT! HER FOOT!

69
00:02:39,436 --> 00:02:41,104
MY PROJECT!

70
00:02:45,141 --> 00:02:46,643
OH, HONEY!

71
00:02:46,677 --> 00:02:48,812
IS IT POSSIBLE
I ONLY GOT SHOE?

72
00:02:48,845 --> 00:02:51,047
SEARING PAIN
SUGGESTS NO.

73
00:02:51,081 --> 00:02:53,350
OKAY, ALL RIGHT, COME ON.
LET'S GET YOU IN THE CAR.

74
00:02:53,384 --> 00:02:55,286
JOE, THROW YOUR THING
IN THE BACK, PLEASE.

75
00:02:55,286 --> 00:02:57,153
LET ME TAKE THIS OUT,
SWEETHEART. THERE YOU GO.

76
00:02:57,187 --> 00:02:58,922
DAD, THE CAR IS LOCKED!

77
00:02:58,955 --> 00:03:00,491
YES, COME THROUGH THIS WAY!

78
00:03:00,524 --> 00:03:01,825
[car horn beeps]
GO THROUGH OVER YOUR SISTER!

79
00:03:01,858 --> 00:03:03,193
- [screaming]
- HOLD ON!

80
00:03:03,294 --> 00:03:05,061
ALL RIGHT, JUST LET HIM
IN THE CAR, PLEASE, EMILY!

81
00:03:05,095 --> 00:03:07,898
THANK YOU. OKAY.
- [shrieks]

82
00:03:07,931 --> 00:03:10,667
I'M SO--

83
00:03:10,701 --> 00:03:12,869
- [screams]
- THANK YOU.

84
00:03:16,139 --> 00:03:17,408
[engine turning over]
- [shrieks] NO!

85
00:03:17,441 --> 00:03:18,875
EVERYBODY QUIET DOWN!

86
00:03:18,909 --> 00:03:21,445
THAT WENT BETTER
THAN I THOUGHT.

87
00:03:23,314 --> 00:03:25,916
AQUARIUM, HERE WE COME!

88
00:03:28,084 --> 00:03:29,820
HELLO?

89
00:03:29,853 --> 00:03:34,691
[high-pitched squealing]

90
00:03:34,725 --> 00:03:37,694
[upbeat theme music]

91
00:03:37,728 --> 00:03:44,234
♪

92
00:03:47,538 --> 00:03:50,807
MERRY CHRISTMAS, GUS.
AND THANKS AGAIN.

93
00:03:50,841 --> 00:03:53,143
HEY, WHAT ARE
GUARDIAN ANGELS FOR?

94
00:03:53,176 --> 00:03:54,745
- [TV audience laughing]
- OH, DAVID, DON'T BE

95
00:03:54,778 --> 00:03:56,580
SO HARD ON YOURSELF.

96
00:03:56,613 --> 00:03:58,248
ACCIDENTS HAPPEN.

97
00:03:58,349 --> 00:03:59,416
EMILY'S BROKEN TOE WILL HEAL

98
00:03:59,450 --> 00:04:01,885
AND JOE GOT AN EXTENSION
ON HIS PROJECT.

99
00:04:01,918 --> 00:04:03,620
WHAT ABOUT JANIE?

100
00:04:03,654 --> 00:04:07,391
WELL, TWO OUT OF THREE
AIN'T BAD.

101
00:04:07,424 --> 00:04:10,361
YOU KNOW,
AFTER THE DAY I'VE HAD,

102
00:04:10,394 --> 00:04:12,195
I REALLY FEEL LIKE--

103
00:04:12,228 --> 00:04:14,064
A FAILURE?
A DISAPPOINTMENT?

104
00:04:14,097 --> 00:04:17,368
I WAS GONNA SAY
FROZEN YOGURT.

105
00:04:17,368 --> 00:04:21,638
BUT THANK YOU.
NOW I'M HUNGRY AND DEPRESSED.

106
00:04:21,672 --> 00:04:23,974
MAYBE I'M JUST FOOLING MYSELF,
I DON'T KNOW.

107
00:04:24,007 --> 00:04:25,709
MAYBE I'M A LOUSY FATHER.

108
00:04:25,742 --> 00:04:28,712
YOU'RE A GREAT FATHER.
YOU JUST HAD A BAD DAY.

109
00:04:28,745 --> 00:04:31,281
WAITING FOR THE CABLE GUY
FOR FIVE HOURS IS A BAD DAY.

110
00:04:31,382 --> 00:04:33,984
I RAN OVER EMILY'S FOOT!

111
00:04:34,017 --> 00:04:36,186
I'M BEGINNING TO THINK
THAT OUR KIDS' LIVES

112
00:04:36,219 --> 00:04:38,655
WOULD'VE BEEN BETTER IF,
YOU KNOW,

113
00:04:38,689 --> 00:04:40,591
I WASN'T STAYING AT HOME.

114
00:04:40,624 --> 00:04:42,459
AND THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO
WITH TED MCGINLEY

115
00:04:42,493 --> 00:04:44,428
GETTING YOUR
PART IN MARCUS'S MOVIE?

116
00:04:44,461 --> 00:04:46,397
OH, NO. NO. NO--YES!

117
00:04:46,397 --> 00:04:48,999
YES! THAT WAS PART WAS MINE!

118
00:04:49,032 --> 00:04:51,535
I JUST THINK THAT IF I WOULD'VE
STUCK TO THE ONE THING

119
00:04:51,568 --> 00:04:53,036
THAT I WAS GREAT AT,

120
00:04:53,069 --> 00:04:55,005
BEING A LOVED AND ADMIRED
TV STAR,

121
00:04:55,038 --> 00:04:57,774
THEN OUR KIDS' LIVES
WOULD'VE BEEN HAPPIER.

122
00:04:57,808 --> 00:04:59,410
OH.

123
00:04:59,410 --> 00:05:01,912
DAVID, I LOVE YOU.

124
00:05:01,945 --> 00:05:03,279
THE KIDS LOVE YOU.

125
00:05:03,313 --> 00:05:06,783
AND I PROMISE EVERYTHING
WILL BE BETTER IN THE MORNING.

126
00:05:06,817 --> 00:05:08,419
OKAY?

127
00:05:08,419 --> 00:05:10,421
OH, AND I'M SORRY, BUT THE CABLE
GUY WILL BE HERE TOMORROW

128
00:05:10,421 --> 00:05:13,624
BETWEEN 9:00 AND 2:00.

129
00:05:13,657 --> 00:05:14,791
YOU SURE YOU DON'T
WANT TO STAY

130
00:05:14,825 --> 00:05:16,793
FOR MY WIFE'S
POT ROAST, GUS?

131
00:05:16,827 --> 00:05:18,695
EVEN GUARDIAN ANGELS
NEED TO EAT.

132
00:05:18,729 --> 00:05:21,598
[sighs] I'LL NEVER
BE THAT HUNGRY, DAVID.

133
00:05:21,632 --> 00:05:24,868
[laughing]

134
00:05:24,901 --> 00:05:26,603
NOW THAT WAS
A GREAT EPISODE.

135
00:05:26,637 --> 00:05:28,472
AAH!

136
00:05:28,505 --> 00:05:30,340
AAH! AAH!

137
00:05:30,441 --> 00:05:31,575
WHAT--

138
00:05:34,144 --> 00:05:35,546
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

139
00:05:35,579 --> 00:05:36,913
YOU CALLED ME.

140
00:05:36,947 --> 00:05:38,014
YOU THOUGHT EVERYONE
WOULD BE HAPPIER

141
00:05:38,048 --> 00:05:39,215
IF YOU NEVER LEFT THE SHOW.

142
00:05:39,249 --> 00:05:40,884
I'M HERE TO GIVE YOU
THE CHANCE TO FIND OUT.

143
00:05:40,917 --> 00:05:43,286
WHAT? HOW--
HOW YOU GONNA DO THAT?

144
00:05:43,319 --> 00:05:44,855
YOU'RE AN ACTOR.

145
00:05:44,888 --> 00:05:48,725
GUARDIAN ANGEL IS MY DAY JOB.
ACTING IS MY PASSION.

146
00:05:48,759 --> 00:05:52,629
YOU WANT TO FIND OUT WHAT YOUR
LIFE WOULD BE LIKE OR NOT?

147
00:05:52,663 --> 00:05:53,730
WELL, YEAH.

148
00:05:53,764 --> 00:05:55,499
THEN COME ON.

149
00:05:55,532 --> 00:05:58,669
WAIT--WHOA--WAIT, WAIT!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING--

150
00:05:58,702 --> 00:06:02,305
WOW, YOU JUST WALKED
INTO THE TELEVISION.

151
00:06:02,338 --> 00:06:05,075
I REALLY SHOULD'VE
READ THE MANUAL.

152
00:06:05,108 --> 00:06:06,342
WAIT--NO, NO, NO!

153
00:06:07,778 --> 00:06:10,581
MY OLD {\an8}<i>SEE DAD RUN</i> SET.

154
00:06:10,614 --> 00:06:12,716
IT'S LIKE I NEVER LEFT.

155
00:06:12,749 --> 00:06:15,486
THAT'S BECAUSE
YOU DIDN'T, DAVID.

156
00:06:15,486 --> 00:06:17,120
MY SHOW'S STILL ON TV?

157
00:06:17,153 --> 00:06:20,090
AND BIGGER THAN EVER.

158
00:06:20,123 --> 00:06:21,725
AND I'M STILL
LOVED AND ADMIRED?

159
00:06:21,758 --> 00:06:24,127
all: WE LOVE YOU, DAVID!

160
00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:27,030
WOW, HI.
THANK YOU, I--YOU REMEMBERED.

161
00:06:27,063 --> 00:06:29,766
MAKE WAY, PEOPLE.
NETWORK PRESIDENT MR. KOSTNER

162
00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,334
IS HERE TO SEE MR. HOBBS.

163
00:06:35,739 --> 00:06:37,608
KEVIN'S THE NETWORK PRESIDENT?

164
00:06:37,641 --> 00:06:39,943
YOU PROMOTED HIM
WHILE HE WAS YOUR ASSISTANT.

165
00:06:39,976 --> 00:06:43,413
EVEN THOUGH I'VE BEEN
HERE TEN YEARS LONGER.

166
00:06:43,514 --> 00:06:45,315
BOO-HOO, PATRICK.

167
00:06:45,348 --> 00:06:48,819
MMM. YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU CIRCLE
THE STAGE UNTIL WE'RE DONE HERE.

168
00:06:50,621 --> 00:06:51,988
NOT IN THE CART, PATRICK.

169
00:06:55,258 --> 00:06:56,527
[laughs]
WOW!

170
00:06:56,527 --> 00:06:58,028
HEY, I HAVE THE POWER
TO PROMOTE YOU?

171
00:06:58,061 --> 00:06:59,863
HEY, EVER SINCE
YOU WON THAT EMMY.

172
00:06:59,896 --> 00:07:01,264
I WON AN EMMY?

173
00:07:01,297 --> 00:07:03,233
OKAY, MY MISTAKE.
TWO EMMYS.

174
00:07:03,266 --> 00:07:05,235
TWO! OH, THAT IS SWEET!

175
00:07:05,268 --> 00:07:07,538
OKAY, PEOPLE, LISTEN UP!

176
00:07:07,538 --> 00:07:09,806
FOR {\an8}<i>SEE DAD RUN'S</i>
300th EPISODE,

177
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:13,677
I HAVE DECIDED TO BLOW
AMERICA'S COLLECTIVE MIND

178
00:07:13,710 --> 00:07:17,080
WITH OUR FIRST EVER
LIVE BROADCAST!

179
00:07:17,113 --> 00:07:21,284
[all cheering]

180
00:07:21,317 --> 00:07:23,419
[phone rings]
- HEY, I'VE GOT TO TAKE THIS.

181
00:07:23,453 --> 00:07:25,088
PATRICK, HUG DAVID
FOR ME, ALL RIGHT?

182
00:07:30,026 --> 00:07:32,428
MAN, GUS, WORK COULD
NOT HAVE BEEN BETTER.

183
00:07:32,462 --> 00:07:34,464
AND I BET MY KIDS
ARE BETTER OFF, TOO.

184
00:07:34,565 --> 00:07:36,733
WELL, THEY ARE A LITTLE...

185
00:07:36,767 --> 00:07:38,201
OFF.

186
00:07:38,234 --> 00:07:40,804
DADDY, YOU'RE HOME!
YOU'RE HOME! YOU'RE HOME!

187
00:07:40,837 --> 00:07:43,439
OOH!
OH, WOW, WHAT A GREETING.

188
00:07:43,473 --> 00:07:45,041
AND LOOK AT YOUR FOOT.

189
00:07:45,075 --> 00:07:47,811
OKAY!

190
00:07:47,844 --> 00:07:49,079
HER FOOT'S FINE, DAVID.

191
00:07:49,112 --> 00:07:50,146
YOU NEVER RAN OVER IT.

192
00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:51,381
BUT SINCE YOU'RE
ALWAYS WORKING,

193
00:07:51,414 --> 00:07:53,717
SHE'S GOTTEN
A LITTLE...NEEDY.

194
00:07:53,750 --> 00:07:55,451
- SWEETIE--
- OH! COME SIT ON THE COUCH.

195
00:07:55,485 --> 00:07:57,588
YOU CAN TELL ME EVERY
DETAIL FROM YOUR DAY

196
00:07:57,621 --> 00:07:59,122
FROM START TO FINISH!

197
00:07:59,155 --> 00:08:02,292
YEAH, WELL, HOW DID YOUR
PET MARCH WITH YOUR FRIENDS GO?

198
00:08:02,325 --> 00:08:04,928
FRIENDS?
I DON'T NEED FRIENDS...

199
00:08:04,961 --> 00:08:08,364
♪ BECAUSE I HAVE
A DADDY LIKE YOU! ♪

200
00:08:08,398 --> 00:08:09,933
DID YOU JUST SING THAT?

201
00:08:09,966 --> 00:08:12,435
YEAH. I WROTE YOU
YOUR OWN THEME SONG.

202
00:08:12,468 --> 00:08:15,872
IT'S CALLED
* DADDY LIKE YOU!

203
00:08:15,906 --> 00:08:17,373
OH, IT'S IN MY ROOM.
I'LL GO GET IT.

204
00:08:17,407 --> 00:08:19,475
STAY HERE, DADDY.
STAY HERE.

205
00:08:19,509 --> 00:08:22,345
DON'T MOVE!
DON'T LEAVE ME!

206
00:08:23,980 --> 00:08:24,948
I'M HOME! YOU'RE NEVER
GONNA BELIEVE THIS!

207
00:08:24,981 --> 00:08:26,316
WE TOOK FIRST PLACE!

208
00:08:26,349 --> 00:08:29,219
WOW, JOE,
IT DOESN'T EVEN LOOK BROKEN.

209
00:08:29,252 --> 00:08:30,386
'CAUSE YOU NEVER RAN OVER IT.

210
00:08:30,420 --> 00:08:31,722
WHATEVER, DAD.
I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU.

211
00:08:31,755 --> 00:08:32,856
I WAS TALKING TO TED.

212
00:08:32,889 --> 00:08:34,357
TED?

213
00:08:34,390 --> 00:08:37,360
TED MCGINLEY.
YOUR NANNY.

214
00:08:37,393 --> 00:08:39,630
HEY! YOU DID IT!

215
00:08:39,630 --> 00:08:41,732
NO, TED. WE DID IT.

216
00:08:41,765 --> 00:08:43,033
HA HA!

217
00:08:43,066 --> 00:08:45,401
both: HO!

218
00:08:45,435 --> 00:08:46,770
WHAT'S HAPPENING?

219
00:08:46,803 --> 00:08:48,538
OH, HEY, DAVID.

220
00:08:48,639 --> 00:08:50,741
JOE, WE CAN'T FORGET
ABOUT YOUR DAD.

221
00:08:50,774 --> 00:08:53,744
I OWE HIM BIG TIME.
AFTER MY SHOW WAS CANCELED,

222
00:08:53,777 --> 00:08:55,211
I COULDN'T GET HIRED
ANYWHERE ELSE.

223
00:08:55,245 --> 00:08:57,547
THIS MANNY POSITION
HAS SAVED ME.

224
00:08:57,648 --> 00:09:02,518
AND...YOU KNOW WHAT
THE GREATEST PART IS?

225
00:09:02,552 --> 00:09:06,957
YOU AND I,
WE GET TO BE BEST BUDS.

226
00:09:06,990 --> 00:09:10,426
I-I-I THOUGHT WE WERE
BEST BUDS, JOE.

227
00:09:10,460 --> 00:09:13,263
DAD, DON'T MAKE IT AWKWARD.

228
00:09:13,296 --> 00:09:15,832
[knock at door]

229
00:09:15,866 --> 00:09:18,334
OH! MARCUS, YOU'LL NEVER
BELIEVE WHAT'S GOING ON.

230
00:09:18,368 --> 00:09:20,470
I'LL TELL YOU WHO'S
MOVING ON, DAVID--ME.

231
00:09:20,503 --> 00:09:22,839
I'M RELOCATING
MY FAMILY TO A COMMUNE.

232
00:09:22,873 --> 00:09:24,708
I'LL HATE IT,
BECAUSE I HATE SHARING,

233
00:09:24,741 --> 00:09:26,943
AND I LOVE LONG,
LUXURIOUS SHOWERS.

234
00:09:26,977 --> 00:09:30,847
BUT IT'S BETTER THAN SHARING
A STREET WITH YOU.

235
00:09:30,881 --> 00:09:32,515
BUT YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND.

236
00:09:32,548 --> 00:09:33,950
NOT SINCE YOU FIRED HIM.

237
00:09:33,984 --> 00:09:36,052
WHAT? WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

238
00:09:36,086 --> 00:09:38,388
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG.

239
00:09:38,421 --> 00:09:41,057
READ MY BOOK,
{\an8}<i>WHAT'S WRONG WITH DAVID HOBBS?</i>

240
00:09:44,695 --> 00:09:45,929
WHOA!

241
00:09:45,962 --> 00:09:47,297
YOU GAVE ME A KIDNEY?

242
00:09:47,330 --> 00:09:49,966
YOU FORGOT?

243
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,935
TURNS OUT YOU DIDN'T
EVEN NEED ONE.

244
00:09:51,968 --> 00:09:56,406
YOU'RE THE ONLY MAN I KNOW
WHO HAS A JUST-IN-CASE KIDNEY!

245
00:09:56,439 --> 00:10:00,711
WELL, JUST IN CASE I NEVER SEE
YOU AGAIN, GOOD DAY, SIR!

246
00:10:05,048 --> 00:10:08,251
OH, GOOD, HONEY,
YOU'RE HOME.

247
00:10:08,284 --> 00:10:11,021
GREAT NEWS. THE SWELLING WILL
GO DOWN IN A COUPLE OF DAYS.

248
00:10:11,054 --> 00:10:13,023
FROM, WHAT, YOUR FACE?

249
00:10:13,056 --> 00:10:15,992
NO, I PAID GOOD MONEY
FOR THIS SWELLING.

250
00:10:16,026 --> 00:10:17,828
I'M TALKING
ABOUT MY BUTT, SILLY.

251
00:10:17,861 --> 00:10:20,430
YEAH, UM, HONEY, YOU DIDN'T
HAVE TO DO ALL THIS.

252
00:10:20,463 --> 00:10:22,298
YOU WERE BEAUTIFUL
THE WAY YOU WERE.

253
00:10:22,332 --> 00:10:24,167
OH, DAVID.

254
00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:29,005
I'D CRY IF I STILL
HAD MY TEAR DUCTS.

255
00:10:29,039 --> 00:10:30,373
THERE YOU ARE.

256
00:10:30,406 --> 00:10:32,508
WHY DON'T YOU
DRAG YOUR NEW BUTT

257
00:10:32,542 --> 00:10:35,511
INTO THE KITCHEN
AND MAKE ME DINNER?

258
00:10:35,545 --> 00:10:37,413
- HEY! DON'T TALK TO YOUR--
- PFFT!

259
00:10:37,447 --> 00:10:38,749
- WAIT, WHAT--
- PFFTTT!

260
00:10:38,782 --> 00:10:40,183
DID YOU SPRING A LEAK?
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

261
00:10:40,216 --> 00:10:42,052
PFFFFT! PFFFTTT!

262
00:10:42,085 --> 00:10:43,486
I'M SHUSHING YOU.

263
00:10:43,519 --> 00:10:47,257
TRUST ME, YOU DO NOT WANT
TO PUSH HER BUTTONS.

264
00:10:47,290 --> 00:10:50,126
HUNGRY! FOOD! NOW!

265
00:10:52,929 --> 00:10:54,364
OKAY, I WANT TO GO HOME, GUS.

266
00:10:54,397 --> 00:10:56,566
- YOU ARE HOME, DAVID.
- NO, MY REAL HOME

267
00:10:56,599 --> 00:10:57,901
WHERE MY KIDS ARE NORMAL

268
00:10:57,934 --> 00:10:59,770
AND MY BEST FRIEND
HAS BOTH HIS KIDNEYS.

269
00:10:59,803 --> 00:11:01,938
COME ON, TAKE ME HOME.
LET'S GO.

270
00:11:01,972 --> 00:11:03,439
COME ON!
LET'S DO IT.

271
00:11:03,473 --> 00:11:05,475
COME ON.

272
00:11:05,508 --> 00:11:07,477
THAT'S NOT HOW
IT WORKS, DAVID.

273
00:11:07,510 --> 00:11:08,779
HEY, YOU'RE THE ONE
WHO THOUGHT

274
00:11:08,779 --> 00:11:11,181
THIS LIFE WOULD BE BETTER.

275
00:11:11,214 --> 00:11:12,248
I'M STUCK HERE?

276
00:11:12,282 --> 00:11:14,250
YEAH, WELL SO AM I.

277
00:11:14,284 --> 00:11:15,786
AND SINCE YOU'RE HOME
FOR ONCE,

278
00:11:15,819 --> 00:11:19,055
COME HELP BUBBLE BUTT
WITH MY GRILLED CHEESE!

279
00:11:21,257 --> 00:11:22,558
[lisping]
SLHE'S SHERIOUS.

280
00:11:22,592 --> 00:11:24,060
- WHAT?
- SLHE'S SHERIOUS.

281
00:11:24,094 --> 00:11:25,561
WHAT?

282
00:11:25,595 --> 00:11:27,864
SHE'S SERIOUS.

283
00:11:30,801 --> 00:11:31,935
GUS, OUR KIDS
DON'T ACT THIS WAY.

284
00:11:31,968 --> 00:11:33,169
IN THIS WORLD, THEY DO.

285
00:11:33,203 --> 00:11:34,204
HONEY, YOU'RE
NOT AROUND TO SEE IT,

286
00:11:34,237 --> 00:11:35,405
BUT THIS IS AS GOOD
AS IT GETS.

287
00:11:35,438 --> 00:11:38,074
NO, NO! IT'S--IT'S NOT, HONEY.

288
00:11:38,108 --> 00:11:39,475
THERE'S ANOTHER VERSION
OF THEM.

289
00:11:39,509 --> 00:11:40,844
JANIE IS SWEET,

290
00:11:40,877 --> 00:11:43,646
A-AND EMILY IS INDEPENDENT
AND OUTGOING, AND JOE...

291
00:11:43,679 --> 00:11:47,650
JOE IS--IS HEARTWARMINGLY
WEIRD AND LOVABLE.

292
00:11:47,683 --> 00:11:49,185
HONEY, ENOUGH
WITH THE CRAZY TALK.

293
00:11:49,219 --> 00:11:51,487
OKAY? YOU'RE UPSETTING ME.

294
00:11:51,521 --> 00:11:54,925
I AM? BECAUSE YOUR FACE
LOOKS TOTALLY CALM.

295
00:11:56,893 --> 00:11:58,995
CAN YOU SEE IT NOW?

296
00:12:00,831 --> 00:12:02,933
- NO.
- [groans]

297
00:12:04,567 --> 00:12:06,602
[both hollering]

298
00:12:06,636 --> 00:12:08,038
- I WIN!
- WHOO!

299
00:12:08,071 --> 00:12:10,841
YOU ARE GETTING FASTER,
YOUNG MAN.

300
00:12:10,874 --> 00:12:12,242
THANKS, DAD.

301
00:12:12,275 --> 00:12:14,277
WAIT, DID YOU
JUST CALL TED "DAD"?

302
00:12:14,310 --> 00:12:16,847
OH, DID I?

303
00:12:16,847 --> 00:12:17,981
DID YA?

304
00:12:18,014 --> 00:12:20,550
[both laugh]

305
00:12:20,583 --> 00:12:23,719
COME ON, DAVID.
IT'S AN HONEST MISTAKE.

306
00:12:23,753 --> 00:12:26,289
COME ON, LET'S GO GET YOU
SOME ELECTROLYTES.

307
00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:32,495
SAY, DAVID, THIS SCRIPT
FOR YOUR 300th EPISODE

308
00:12:32,528 --> 00:12:33,864
IS PRETTY GOOD.

309
00:12:33,864 --> 00:12:35,431
DO YOU THINK THE NOSY
NEIGHBOR CHARACTER

310
00:12:35,465 --> 00:12:37,667
COULD BE A YOUNG TEEN?

311
00:12:37,700 --> 00:12:39,502
I CAN'T THINK
ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW, GUS.

312
00:12:39,535 --> 00:12:41,771
I GOT TO FIX MY KIDS.
JOE! JANIE! EMILY!

313
00:12:41,872 --> 00:12:44,407
YES, DADDY?

314
00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:45,876
YOU'VE GOT TWO MINUTES.

315
00:12:45,876 --> 00:12:49,612
OKAY, LISTEN, KIDS.
YOU GUYS HAVE THE POTENTIAL

316
00:12:49,645 --> 00:12:50,981
TO BE GREAT KIDS.

317
00:12:51,014 --> 00:12:52,682
AND AS YOUR DAD--
- I LOVE IT!

318
00:12:52,715 --> 00:12:54,918
SO, OH--YES,
I APPRECIATE THE ENTHUSIASM,

319
00:12:54,951 --> 00:12:56,319
BUT LET ME FINISH.

320
00:12:56,352 --> 00:13:00,056
AND IT'S MY JOB AS YOUR DAD
TO BRING IT OUT OF YOU.

321
00:13:00,090 --> 00:13:01,892
AND THAT'S
WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

322
00:13:01,892 --> 00:13:03,226
NOW?

323
00:13:03,259 --> 00:13:04,995
- SURE.
- I LOVE IT!

324
00:13:09,432 --> 00:13:10,901
GREAT.
NOW AFTER ALL THIS TIME,

325
00:13:10,901 --> 00:13:13,603
HE SUDDENLY WANTS
TO BE A DAD.

326
00:13:13,636 --> 00:13:15,438
AND WE'RE GONNA LET HIM.

327
00:13:15,471 --> 00:13:19,242
SO WE'RE JUST GONNA PLAY ALONG
TILL HE GETS OFF OUR BACKS?

328
00:13:19,275 --> 00:13:22,745
[sinister laughter]

329
00:13:22,778 --> 00:13:25,248
[joins in sinister laughter]

330
00:13:29,052 --> 00:13:30,954
I DON'T SEE
WHY I NEED FRIENDS.

331
00:13:30,987 --> 00:13:32,622
SEE, YOU SAYING THAT

332
00:13:32,655 --> 00:13:35,091
IS THE REASON WE'RE DOING THIS.
NOW GO OVER THERE AND SIT DOWN.

333
00:13:35,125 --> 00:13:36,426
TAKE THIS AND GO, GO, GO.

334
00:13:36,459 --> 00:13:38,728
OH.

335
00:13:38,761 --> 00:13:41,497
SO YOUR DAD SAID YOU WANTED

336
00:13:41,531 --> 00:13:44,167
TO HEAR ABOUT OUR HUMANE
ANIMAL TREATMENT GROUP...

337
00:13:45,401 --> 00:13:48,204
"H.A.T."

338
00:13:48,238 --> 00:13:51,374
I HAVE A HAT
WITH MY DAD'S FACE ON IT.

339
00:13:51,407 --> 00:13:53,243
SHE SCARES ME.

340
00:13:55,011 --> 00:13:57,447
OOH, HEY, I GOT SOME COOKIES
FOR YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS, EMILY.

341
00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:00,250
I'M GONNA GO BRING SOME IN
TO YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER.

342
00:14:00,283 --> 00:14:02,052
- OH, I'LL COME WITH YOU.
- NO, NO, NO. NO, STAY.

343
00:14:02,085 --> 00:14:05,121
STAY. SIT. SIT.

344
00:14:05,155 --> 00:14:07,357
GOOD GIRL.

345
00:14:07,390 --> 00:14:09,325
[women giggling awkwardly]

346
00:14:09,359 --> 00:14:12,395
- COOKIES!
- BOY, DAD.

347
00:14:12,428 --> 00:14:13,729
I WAS WRONG ABOUT
WHAT I SAID YESTERDAY.

348
00:14:13,763 --> 00:14:15,731
I'M REALLY LOVING
THIS ROCK COLLECTION.

349
00:14:15,765 --> 00:14:16,832
I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT.

350
00:14:16,866 --> 00:14:18,234
AND JUST THINK,

351
00:14:18,268 --> 00:14:19,569
IF I LOST ONE,

352
00:14:19,602 --> 00:14:22,038
I CAN JUST GO OUT TO THE DIRT
AND DIG UP ANOTHER ONE!

353
00:14:22,072 --> 00:14:24,374
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S THE COOL KIND OF STUFF

354
00:14:24,407 --> 00:14:26,242
THAT TED DOESN'T HAVE
TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT.

355
00:14:26,276 --> 00:14:28,178
WELL, HE'S RIGHT, JOE.

356
00:14:28,211 --> 00:14:29,445
WHEN IT COMES TO THIS
KIND OF STUFF,

357
00:14:29,479 --> 00:14:32,148
I'M DUMB AS A ROCK.

358
00:14:32,182 --> 00:14:34,417
TED, DO YOU MIND?
THIS IS OUR THING.

359
00:14:34,450 --> 00:14:36,519
YEAH. YEAH, TED.
THIS IS OUR THING!

360
00:14:40,556 --> 00:14:41,992
I'VE GOT THE DRESS ON,

361
00:14:42,025 --> 00:14:44,995
AND BOY DO I FEEL PRETTY!

362
00:14:44,995 --> 00:14:46,429
YOU LOOK PRETTY.

363
00:14:46,462 --> 00:14:48,999
SWEETHEART, I'VE GOT A TEA PARTY
ALL SET UP FOR YOU RIGHT HERE,

364
00:14:48,999 --> 00:14:50,400
YOUR HIGHNESS.
HAVE A SEAT.

365
00:14:50,433 --> 00:14:53,736
OKAY, I'VE GOT
SOME TEA FOR YOU.

366
00:14:53,769 --> 00:14:55,805
I'VE GOT SOME TEA
FOR PRINCESS BELLA,

367
00:14:55,838 --> 00:14:59,909
AND SOME MORE TEA
FOR DR. MONKEY CHUNKS.

368
00:15:00,010 --> 00:15:01,844
I'M NEVER
LETTER HER GO.

369
00:15:01,877 --> 00:15:04,314
YEAH.
OKAY.

370
00:15:11,021 --> 00:15:13,023
JOE AND JANIE
ARE COMING AROUND.

371
00:15:13,023 --> 00:15:15,425
BUT EMILY'S STILL
FASCINATED WITH YOU.

372
00:15:15,458 --> 00:15:19,829
MILLIONS OF AMERICANS WOULD
AGREE THERE'S NO CURE FOR THAT.

373
00:15:19,862 --> 00:15:21,731
SHE'S STILL A SCARED
LITTLE BIRD.

374
00:15:21,764 --> 00:15:23,466
[bird cawing]

375
00:15:23,499 --> 00:15:25,101
WHAT WAS THAT?

376
00:15:25,135 --> 00:15:27,670
IT'S A SCARED LITTLE BIRD.
WE NEED TO HELP IT.

377
00:15:27,703 --> 00:15:28,838
DID YOU JUST NAIL THAT BIRD

378
00:15:28,871 --> 00:15:31,474
TO GIVE THEM SOMETHING
TO BOND OVER?

379
00:15:31,507 --> 00:15:33,343
IT MUST BE IN SHOCK.

380
00:15:33,376 --> 00:15:35,911
OH, WE NEED TO MAKE IT
A LITTLE NEST.

381
00:15:35,945 --> 00:15:39,449
EMILY, WE CAN
USE YOUR DAD HAT.

382
00:15:39,482 --> 00:15:41,651
OKAY. BUT BE CAREFUL.

383
00:15:41,684 --> 00:15:42,652
OF THE BIRD?

384
00:15:42,685 --> 00:15:45,788
I MEANT THE HAT,
BUT SURE.

385
00:15:49,259 --> 00:15:50,360
NICE WORK.

386
00:15:50,393 --> 00:15:52,062
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY.

387
00:15:52,095 --> 00:15:53,796
EVERY TIME A BIRD
SMASHES INTO A WINDOW,

388
00:15:53,829 --> 00:15:57,300
AN ANGEL GETS HIS WINGS.

389
00:15:57,333 --> 00:15:59,302
- IS THAT WHAT THEY SAY--
- I'M PARAPHRASING.

390
00:15:59,335 --> 00:16:00,670
OKAY.

391
00:16:03,473 --> 00:16:05,308
WELL, I'M OFF TO WORK.

392
00:16:05,341 --> 00:16:07,943
OKAY. IT'S ALL GONNA BE OKAY.

393
00:16:07,977 --> 00:16:09,779
I THINK THE KIDS
HAVE TURNED A CORNER.

394
00:16:09,812 --> 00:16:11,814
I'M THRILLED FOR YOU, DAVID.

395
00:16:16,086 --> 00:16:18,154
I'LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT.

396
00:16:22,592 --> 00:16:24,094
I CAN'T BELIEVE HE MADE ME
PLAY WITH ROCKS.

397
00:16:24,127 --> 00:16:25,395
[rocks clatter]

398
00:16:25,428 --> 00:16:28,831
AND I LOOKED LIKE
A TOTAL DORK IN THAT DRESS.

399
00:16:28,864 --> 00:16:31,467
DUMB BIRD POOPED
IN MY DAD HAT.

400
00:16:31,501 --> 00:16:33,603
WELL, YOU WERE RIGHT.
FAKING IT WORKED.

401
00:16:33,636 --> 00:16:35,471
NOW MAYBE
HE'LL LEAVE US ALONE.

402
00:16:37,173 --> 00:16:39,442
WELL, AT LEAST
HE TRIED BEING A REAL DAD.

403
00:16:39,475 --> 00:16:41,177
BIG DEAL. FOR ONE DAY.

404
00:16:41,211 --> 00:16:42,945
THEY WERE LYING TO ME?

405
00:16:42,978 --> 00:16:44,647
DID YOU REALLY THINK

406
00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:47,850
YOU'D MAKE UP FOR ALL
THAT LOST TIME IN ONE DAY?

407
00:16:47,883 --> 00:16:50,153
WE GOT TO GO TO SCHOOL.

408
00:16:50,186 --> 00:16:53,789
TED! CAR! NOW!

409
00:16:54,490 --> 00:16:55,658
COMING!

410
00:16:55,691 --> 00:16:57,793
GOOD LUCK WITH
THE LIVE SHOW TONIGHT, DAVID.

411
00:16:59,495 --> 00:17:00,763
[audience applauding]
- ALL RIGHT,

412
00:17:00,796 --> 00:17:02,198
COMING BACK FROM COMMERCIAL.
LAST LOOKS, PLEASE.

413
00:17:02,232 --> 00:17:04,334
PLACES, PEOPLE.
- DAVID, BABY,

414
00:17:04,367 --> 00:17:06,202
MORE PEOPLE
ARE WATCHING THIS LIVE SHOW

415
00:17:06,236 --> 00:17:07,237
THAN THE SUPER BOWL.

416
00:17:07,270 --> 00:17:08,904
AH, MAN.
YOU'RE KILLING IT, BABE!

417
00:17:08,938 --> 00:17:10,373
I COULD KISS YOU.

418
00:17:10,406 --> 00:17:11,707
BUT--PATRICK!

419
00:17:14,377 --> 00:17:17,747
AND WE'RE BACK LIVE
IN THREE...TWO...

420
00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:18,914
[upbeat music]

421
00:17:18,948 --> 00:17:22,418
DAD, I CAN'T GO
TO PROM LIKE THIS!

422
00:17:27,857 --> 00:17:30,360
NOW YOU CAN.
PROBLEM SOLVED!

423
00:17:30,393 --> 00:17:32,262
DADDY!

424
00:17:33,829 --> 00:17:35,931
HERE YOU GO, SWEETHEART.

425
00:17:35,965 --> 00:17:37,267
all: AWWW!

426
00:17:38,801 --> 00:17:40,870
I AM SO LUCKY.

427
00:17:40,903 --> 00:17:43,339
NO MATTER WHAT,
YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME.

428
00:17:43,373 --> 00:17:45,208
YOU'RE THE PERFECT DAD.

429
00:17:45,241 --> 00:17:48,178
WELL, DUH!
THAT'S MY JOB.

430
00:17:48,178 --> 00:17:51,080
[all laughing]

431
00:17:55,918 --> 00:17:58,087
UM...

432
00:17:59,622 --> 00:18:02,458
BUT I'M, UH, I'M NOT
THE PERFECT DAD.

433
00:18:02,492 --> 00:18:05,695
NO, NO! IT SAYS
RIGHT HERE YOU ARE.

434
00:18:05,728 --> 00:18:08,097
I'M SORRY, I--
I CAN'T DO THIS.

435
00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,001
WHAT'S HAPPENING?

436
00:18:12,034 --> 00:18:15,205
HE'S--HE'S GONE ROGUE.
JUST STOP THE SHOW.

437
00:18:15,238 --> 00:18:17,507
SEE, THE FACT
OF THE MATTER IS

438
00:18:17,540 --> 00:18:20,876
THAT LIFE IS NOT
ABOUT BEING PERFECT.

439
00:18:20,910 --> 00:18:24,347
IT'S, UM, IT'S ABOUT RUNNING
OVER YOUR DAUGHTER'S TOES

440
00:18:24,380 --> 00:18:27,717
AND WRECKING YOUR SON'S
SCIENCE PROJECT

441
00:18:27,750 --> 00:18:31,254
AND LEAVING YOUR SIX-YEAR-OLD
AT HOME ALONE.

442
00:18:31,287 --> 00:18:33,389
audience: OH!

443
00:18:33,423 --> 00:18:35,658
SHE'S FINE. UM...

444
00:18:37,327 --> 00:18:39,829
BUT WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT

445
00:18:39,862 --> 00:18:41,697
IS THAT YOU'RE THERE FOR THEM.

446
00:18:41,731 --> 00:18:45,401
AND...THAT THEY KNOW
YOU'RE THERE FOR THEM.

447
00:18:49,239 --> 00:18:50,373
I GOT TO GO.

448
00:18:52,041 --> 00:18:53,643
THE MAN MELTS MY HEART.

449
00:18:53,676 --> 00:18:57,647
I'M GONNA HAVE TO FIRE HIM,
BUT HE MOVES ME.

450
00:18:57,680 --> 00:19:00,082
PATRICK, CRY FOR ME.

451
00:19:00,115 --> 00:19:01,651
[crying]

452
00:19:04,820 --> 00:19:06,622
- WHERE YOU GOING?
- HOME.

453
00:19:06,656 --> 00:19:09,259
EVEN IF I CAN'T
GO BACK WHERE I STARTED,

454
00:19:09,259 --> 00:19:10,993
MY WEIRD KIDS NEED ME.

455
00:19:11,026 --> 00:19:13,429
WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE A SHORTCUT?

456
00:19:15,965 --> 00:19:18,968
- DAD! GET OUT OF THE WAY.
- YOU'RE BLOCKING THE TV.

457
00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:23,873
EMILY. YOUR FOOT.
IT LOOKS TERRIBLE!

458
00:19:23,906 --> 00:19:25,941
OW! OW! DAD, QUIT IT!

459
00:19:25,975 --> 00:19:28,143
AND JOE, YOUR ROCK PROJECT,
IT'S--IT'S--

460
00:19:28,177 --> 00:19:31,614
IT'S BACK TO BEING
ABOUT BORING ROCKS!

461
00:19:33,349 --> 00:19:34,450
TED'S NOT HERE, IS HE?

462
00:19:34,484 --> 00:19:38,921
- TED WHO?
- OH! MUSIC TO MY EARS!

463
00:19:38,954 --> 00:19:40,456
[laughing]

464
00:19:41,991 --> 00:19:43,593
I THOUGHT
YOU COULDN'T FIX THIS.

465
00:19:43,626 --> 00:19:46,629
I DIDN'T, DAVID.
YOU DID.

466
00:19:46,662 --> 00:19:50,366
ONCE YOU REALIZED
WHERE YOU NEEDED TO BE.

467
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:51,367
- DADDY?
- YES!

468
00:19:51,401 --> 00:19:52,802
- ARE YOU FEELING OKAY?
- OH...

469
00:19:52,835 --> 00:19:55,671
'CAUSE DOCTOR MONKEY CHUNKS
CAN GIVE YOU A CHECK-UP.

470
00:19:55,705 --> 00:20:00,209
JANIE. NO, GIVE ME A HUG,
MY BEAUTIFUL LITTLE PRINCESS.

471
00:20:00,310 --> 00:20:01,644
OH, I'M SO--AMY!
- I'M HOME.

472
00:20:01,677 --> 00:20:05,047
AMY! DON'T EVER CHANGE
THAT FACE!

473
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:06,816
I LOVE IT.
- OKAY.

474
00:20:06,849 --> 00:20:08,484
LOOK AT THAT.
THAT'S CONFUSION, RIGHT?

475
00:20:08,518 --> 00:20:09,819
YOU'RE CONFUSED.
I GET IT.

476
00:20:09,852 --> 00:20:10,853
I CAN SEE IT WRITTEN
ALL OVER YOUR FACE.

477
00:20:10,886 --> 00:20:11,854
I LOVE IT.
AND THE BUTT?

478
00:20:11,887 --> 00:20:12,955
DON'T EVER CHANGE THE BUTT.

479
00:20:12,988 --> 00:20:14,123
IT'S THE PERFECT SIZE.

480
00:20:14,156 --> 00:20:16,025
- OOH! INAPPROPRIATE!
- GROSS!

481
00:20:16,058 --> 00:20:18,027
EARMUFFS!

482
00:20:18,060 --> 00:20:21,263
OH, COME ON. GUYS,
I WANT YOU TO KNOW SOMETHING.

483
00:20:21,297 --> 00:20:23,566
I AM NEVER
GOING ANYWHERE.

484
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:25,401
BECAUSE NOW I KNOW

485
00:20:25,435 --> 00:20:27,903
WHAT A DIFFERENCE
I MADE IN YOUR LIVES.

486
00:20:27,937 --> 00:20:29,204
YOU KNOW WHAT'D BE
REALLY DIFFERENT?

487
00:20:29,238 --> 00:20:30,473
WHAT?

488
00:20:30,506 --> 00:20:32,675
IF YOU STOPPED
TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF.

489
00:20:32,708 --> 00:20:34,377
[chuckles]

490
00:20:34,410 --> 00:20:36,746
THE WORLD
IS A MAGICAL PLACE.

491
00:20:36,779 --> 00:20:39,081
[groaning]

492
00:20:39,114 --> 00:20:41,250
HE IS SO WEIRD.