1 00:00:10,227 --> 00:00:12,534 OOH. LOOK WHAT'S FOR DINNER. 2 00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:15,537 A PINK, FOUR-FOOT HOAGIE. 3 00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:16,625 - DAD, STOP. - [giggling] 4 00:00:16,755 --> 00:00:18,105 DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD. 5 00:00:18,235 --> 00:00:19,454 SHE'S PLANKING. 6 00:00:19,584 --> 00:00:20,890 YOU'RE PLANKING? 7 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:23,197 IN MY DAY, WE CALLED THAT NAPPING. 8 00:00:23,327 --> 00:00:26,113 IN YOUR DAY, THEY DIDN'T HAVE VIRAL VIDEOS. 9 00:00:26,243 --> 00:00:29,203 IF THIS THING TAKES OFF, WE COULD MAKE A TON OF MONEY. 10 00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:31,292 CHA-CHING. 11 00:00:31,422 --> 00:00:34,077 OOH, AND I'VE HAD MY EYE ON SOMETHING. 12 00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:36,601 FROM THE ACTUAL SHOOTING SET OF {\an8}HARRY POTTER, 13 00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:38,690 A COLLECTOR'S BOX OF GRAVEL. 14 00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:43,521 AND DR. MONKEY CHUNKS NEEDS A NEW STEP-A-COPE. 15 00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:45,349 LOOK, I ADMIRE THE WORK ETHIC, GUYS, 16 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:46,916 AND IF YOU COULD FIGURE OUT A WAY TO MAKE MONEY 17 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,483 BY LAYING DOWN, LET ME KNOW. 18 00:00:48,613 --> 00:00:50,659 THANKS. 19 00:00:50,789 --> 00:00:53,053 "STEP-A-COPE"? - LET IT GO. 20 00:00:53,183 --> 00:00:54,837 - HEY, DAD. - HEY. 21 00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:56,143 EMILY, HOW WAS SCHOOL? 22 00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:57,274 GOOD, I GOT A PART IN THE PLAY 23 00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:59,189 AND AN "A" ON MY ENGLISH PAPER. 24 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:01,017 WAIT, WHAT? 25 00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:02,453 I GOT AN "A" ON MY PAPER. 26 00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:04,107 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. GO BACK. 27 00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:05,761 I GOT A PART IN THE PLAY? 28 00:01:05,891 --> 00:01:07,806 REALLY? WOW! 29 00:01:07,937 --> 00:01:10,592 EMILY, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! 30 00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:13,073 ONE OF MY KIDS IS GOING TO FOLLOW IN MY FOOTSTEPS. 31 00:01:13,203 --> 00:01:15,205 THIS IS FANTASTIC. WHAT'S THE PLAY? 32 00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:16,554 OH, I'M SURE YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF IT. 33 00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:17,729 {\an8}BATTLE SCA-- 34 00:01:17,860 --> 00:01:20,558 {\an8}BATTLE SCARS: THE JIMMY BURNS STORY? 35 00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:22,299 YEAH. 36 00:01:22,430 --> 00:01:24,780 EMILY, I AUDITIONED FOR THAT PLAY IN HIGH SCHOOL. 37 00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:28,175 MY ENTIRE JUNIOR YEAR, I LIVED AND BREATHED JIMMY BURNS. 38 00:01:28,305 --> 00:01:30,612 "MY NAME IS JIMMY BURNS, AND I WENT OFF TO WAR 39 00:01:30,742 --> 00:01:32,527 "TO FIGHT THE NORTHERN DEVIL. 40 00:01:32,657 --> 00:01:36,444 "AND WHEN I CAME HOME, I HAD ME A CHANCE AT A NEW LIFE 41 00:01:36,574 --> 00:01:39,447 WITH MY BEAUTIFUL NURSE VICTORIA." 42 00:01:39,577 --> 00:01:41,144 WOW. 43 00:01:45,844 --> 00:01:47,846 WOW. - UH-HUH. 44 00:01:47,977 --> 00:01:49,413 I AM SURE YOU WERE GREAT. 45 00:01:49,544 --> 00:01:50,893 YEAH, I WOULD HAVE BEEN. 46 00:01:51,023 --> 00:01:51,937 I DIDN'T GET THE PART. 47 00:01:52,068 --> 00:01:54,462 OH, NO. 48 00:01:54,592 --> 00:01:56,159 TEDDY JOSEFEK STOLE IT. 49 00:01:56,290 --> 00:01:58,944 MR. SENIOR. MR. I-GET-EVERYTHING. 50 00:01:59,075 --> 00:02:00,859 IT'S OKAY, I'VE MOVED ON. 51 00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:03,558 I CAN SEE THAT. 52 00:02:03,688 --> 00:02:04,994 CAN I GO? 53 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:05,995 YEAH, WAIT, NO, WAIT, WAIT, W-WAIT. 54 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:06,996 WHAT PART DID YOU GET? VICTORIA? 55 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,519 BECAUSE YOU'RE PERFECT FOR IT. 56 00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:10,391 NO. 57 00:02:10,521 --> 00:02:11,870 HER EMOTIONALLY DISTURBED SISTER, AMELIA? 58 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,481 NOPE. 59 00:02:13,611 --> 00:02:17,137 I'M SCREAMING/FAINTING LADY NUMBER TWO. 60 00:02:17,267 --> 00:02:19,617 WOW. 61 00:02:19,748 --> 00:02:22,011 WOW. - YEAH. 62 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:26,363 I--OOH. SO, SO PROUD OF YOU. 63 00:02:26,494 --> 00:02:28,365 EMILY. SUPER PROUD. 64 00:02:28,496 --> 00:02:30,802 THANKS. 65 00:02:30,933 --> 00:02:31,890 HEY, BABE. 66 00:02:32,021 --> 00:02:33,501 YEAH, HELLO, WIFE. 67 00:02:33,631 --> 00:02:34,632 WHAT'S WRONG? 68 00:02:34,763 --> 00:02:36,112 EMILY GOT A PART IN THE SCHOOL PLAY. 69 00:02:36,243 --> 00:02:38,332 - [gasps] - THAT'S AWESOME! 70 00:02:38,462 --> 00:02:40,290 WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY. 71 00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,205 THE HOBBS LEGACY LIVES ON. 72 00:02:42,336 --> 00:02:46,992 SHE'S SCREAMING/FAINTING LADY NUMBER TWO. 73 00:02:47,123 --> 00:02:49,473 - OUR DAUGHTER'S AN EXTRA? - OH! 74 00:02:51,736 --> 00:02:52,737 [sobs] 75 00:02:52,868 --> 00:02:55,436 [upbeat music] 76 00:02:55,566 --> 00:03:03,661 ♪ 77 00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:16,631 OH, THIS MUST BE SO DEVASTATING FOR HER. 78 00:03:16,761 --> 00:03:21,462 I MEAN, SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY BE OKAY BEING AN EX-- 79 00:03:23,072 --> 00:03:25,335 BEING AN EX-- 80 00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:28,338 I LITERALLY CAN'T EVEN SAY THE WORD. 81 00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:29,861 HEY, SOME OF OUR GREATEST ACTORS WERE 82 00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:32,951 BACKGROUND PERFORMERS BEFORE THEY WERE STARS, OKAY? 83 00:03:33,082 --> 00:03:34,910 HARRISON FORD, ME, MEG RYAN, BRAD PITT. 84 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:37,260 - WAIT, WHAT? - MEG RYAN, BRAD PITT-- 85 00:03:37,391 --> 00:03:38,783 NO, NO, NO. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 86 00:03:38,914 --> 00:03:40,959 NO. NO, NO, NO. 87 00:03:41,090 --> 00:03:42,091 NO, GO BACK. GO BACK. 88 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:44,224 - HM? - YOU? 89 00:03:44,354 --> 00:03:45,964 YES, I WAS. 90 00:03:46,095 --> 00:03:48,576 I STARTED IN COMMERCIALS AS A BACKGROUND ARTIST. 91 00:03:48,706 --> 00:03:51,579 SO SHE GETS THIS FROM YOU! 92 00:03:51,709 --> 00:03:55,800 I WAS ABLE TO HONE MY SKILLS AS AN ACTOR, OKAY? 93 00:03:55,931 --> 00:03:58,586 FOR INSTANCE, HOW TO WAVE TO SOMEONE WHO ISN'T THERE. 94 00:04:01,937 --> 00:04:04,374 OR HOW TO FAKE TALK IN THE BACKGROUND. 95 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:21,130 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I'M MARRIED TO ANYMORE. 96 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,174 EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME. 97 00:04:22,305 --> 00:04:23,350 HEY, HEY, HEY. WHAT'S UP? 98 00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,047 WAIT FOR IT. 99 00:04:25,177 --> 00:04:27,179 I DON'T SEE WHY THIS IS FUNNY. 100 00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:31,009 [mimicking] I DON'T SEE WHY THIS IS FUNNY. 101 00:04:31,140 --> 00:04:33,185 I'M SERIOUS. GAME'S OVER. 102 00:04:33,316 --> 00:04:35,884 [mimicking] I'M SERIOUS. GAME'S OVER! 103 00:04:36,014 --> 00:04:37,929 PLEASE, MAKE HER STOP. 104 00:04:38,060 --> 00:04:41,890 [mimicking] PLEASE, MAKE HER STOP. 105 00:04:42,020 --> 00:04:44,109 LET ME GUESS, THIS IS CALLED "KEVIN-ING"? 106 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:47,896 THIS IS VIRAL VIDEO GOLD. 107 00:04:48,026 --> 00:04:50,377 YOUR KIDS ARE CRAZY! 108 00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:52,683 [mimicking] YOUR KIDS ARE CRAZY! 109 00:05:00,778 --> 00:05:03,215 THIS HAS TO BE SOUL-CRUSHING FOR EMILY. 110 00:05:03,346 --> 00:05:05,305 I MEAN, THIS-- THIS IS AWFUL. 111 00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:06,697 THIS IS AWESOME! 112 00:05:06,828 --> 00:05:08,525 ALL I HAVE TO DO IS BE AN EXTRA. 113 00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:09,700 GENIUS. 114 00:05:09,831 --> 00:05:10,962 I'M SO PSYCHED. 115 00:05:11,093 --> 00:05:12,877 I'M SO UPSET. 116 00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:15,315 FOR HER. 117 00:05:15,445 --> 00:05:17,229 WELL, OF COURSE WE'RE UPSET. 118 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:19,797 WE'RE OUTRAGED. WE'RE FURIOUS. 119 00:05:19,928 --> 00:05:23,410 FOR HER. 120 00:05:23,540 --> 00:05:25,237 SHE'S PROBABLY DOWNSTAIRS RIGHT NOW 121 00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:26,761 CRYING ON MARY'S SHOULDER, SAYING, 122 00:05:26,891 --> 00:05:28,980 "I HAVE NO LINES. NOTHING TO DO. 123 00:05:29,111 --> 00:05:30,895 ALL I HAVE TO DO IS SCREAM AND FAINT." 124 00:05:31,026 --> 00:05:32,419 I HAVE NO LINES! 125 00:05:32,549 --> 00:05:34,986 NOTHING TO DO EXCEPT SCREAM AND FAINT. 126 00:05:35,117 --> 00:05:37,032 AND GET YOUR FLIRT ON WITH JIMMY BURNS. 127 00:05:37,162 --> 00:05:39,556 AKA MATTHEW PEARSON. 128 00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:41,123 TALK ABOUT SCREAMING AND FAINTING, GIRL. 129 00:05:41,253 --> 00:05:43,038 BEST THING EVER! 130 00:05:43,168 --> 00:05:46,215 WORST THING EVER. 131 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,608 - YOU KNOW WHAT? - HM? 132 00:05:47,738 --> 00:05:49,740 I CAN GO DOWN THERE AND TALK TO THE DIRECTOR. 133 00:05:49,871 --> 00:05:51,089 MAYBE GET HER A JUICIER PART. 134 00:05:51,220 --> 00:05:54,310 MMM, DO WE REALLY WANT TO BE THOSE PARENTS? 135 00:05:54,441 --> 00:05:55,006 NO, WE DON'T WANT TO BE THOSE PARENTS. 136 00:05:55,137 --> 00:05:57,531 WE ARE THOSE PARENTS. 137 00:05:57,661 --> 00:06:00,969 SO YOU, YOU'LL GET HER A... SPEAKING ROLE? 138 00:06:01,099 --> 00:06:03,319 YEAH. I'M THINKING THE LEAD. 139 00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:06,844 WELCOME TO US. 140 00:06:11,196 --> 00:06:13,198 I KNEW I FELT PARENT ENERGY BEHIND ME. 141 00:06:13,329 --> 00:06:17,289 NO PARENTS ALLOWED UNTIL PARENT VOLUNTEER DAYS START. 142 00:06:17,420 --> 00:06:19,596 MAMMA MIA, KISS ME KATE! 143 00:06:19,727 --> 00:06:21,337 DAVID HOBBS! 144 00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:22,860 YEAH, THAT'S ME. 145 00:06:22,991 --> 00:06:26,429 - WAIT, YOU'RE EMILY'S FATHER. - THERE YOU GO. 146 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,344 YOU MUST BE HERE TO SEE YOUR MAGNIFICENT DAUGHTER. 147 00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:29,345 UH, NO, ACTUALLY. 148 00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:31,260 I'M HERE TO, UM, TO VOLUNTEER. 149 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,957 I WAS WONDERING WHEN THE VOLUNTEER DAYS START. 150 00:06:33,088 --> 00:06:37,658 WELL, WE ARE THRILLED TO HAVE YOU, SIR DAVID HOBBS. 151 00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:39,834 [inhales sharply] HAVE YOU BEEN KNIGHTED YET? 152 00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:41,313 BECAUSE YOU SHOULD BE. 153 00:06:41,444 --> 00:06:43,315 I WILL ALERT THE QUEEN. 154 00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:47,015 [as The Queen] ALERT RECEIVED! 155 00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:49,017 [chuckles] YEAH. 156 00:06:49,147 --> 00:06:53,674 YOU ARE HEREBY KNIGHTED. [laughs] 157 00:06:53,804 --> 00:06:55,458 I CAN'T BELIEVE SUCH A BIG STAR'S 158 00:06:55,589 --> 00:06:56,981 GOING TO PAINT OUR SETS. 159 00:06:57,112 --> 00:07:02,726 OR GIVE YOU A COUPLE OF BUCKS TO HIRE A PAINTER. 160 00:07:02,857 --> 00:07:06,556 WHILE I ADMIRE THAT GREATLY, I'M SURE YOU CAN AGREE 161 00:07:06,687 --> 00:07:11,605 THAT VOLUNTEERING CAN ONLY TAKE US SO FAR. 162 00:07:11,735 --> 00:07:14,129 SPLASH IS WHAT WE REALLY NEED FOR THIS SHOW. 163 00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:15,870 WOULD YOU BE OKAY 164 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:18,655 IF I BUMPED THE DAUGHTER OF DAVID HOBBS 165 00:07:18,786 --> 00:07:20,265 UP TO A SPLASHIER ROLE? 166 00:07:20,396 --> 00:07:24,313 OH, MY GOD, TELL ME. BE HONEST. GO. 167 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,402 YOU'RE THE DIRECTOR. 168 00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:27,664 YEAH. 169 00:07:27,795 --> 00:07:29,971 OH, WELL. SPLASH AWAY. 170 00:07:30,101 --> 00:07:31,451 LOOK AT YOU, 171 00:07:31,581 --> 00:07:34,497 WITH THE JAZZ HANDS. - [laughs] 172 00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:40,982 HEY. JOE, HOW'S THE VIDEO GOING? 173 00:07:41,112 --> 00:07:42,157 TERRIBLE. 174 00:07:42,287 --> 00:07:43,985 THE "KEVIN-ING" VIDEO ONLY GOT TEN HITS. 175 00:07:44,115 --> 00:07:46,378 HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? 176 00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:48,032 BUT MY NEXT ONE IS GOING TO BLOW UP. 177 00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:51,166 IT'S CALLED "WRAPPING." 178 00:07:51,296 --> 00:07:54,299 OH, WRAPPING. 179 00:07:55,997 --> 00:07:57,346 SHE'S A PRESENT. 180 00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:00,480 I'M A VICTIM. 181 00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:05,920 "WRAPPING." 182 00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:08,357 OH, OH. 183 00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,751 HEY. EMILY, HOW WAS REHEARSAL? 184 00:08:10,881 --> 00:08:13,536 I GOT BUMPED TO THE LEAD ROLE IN THE PLAY. 185 00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:15,103 [gasps] 186 00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:17,409 MR. PERINO DECIDED I'D BE THE PERFECT VICTORIA. 187 00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:20,021 SWEETIE, THIS IS GREAT NEWS! 188 00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:21,326 BUT I DON'T-- 189 00:08:21,457 --> 00:08:22,850 "BUT"? WHAT DO YOU MEAN "BUT"? 190 00:08:22,980 --> 00:08:25,635 YOUR DIRECTOR KNOWS TALENT WHEN HE SEES IT, OBVIOUSLY. 191 00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:29,247 GUYS, I'M NOT SURE I WANT TO ACT. 192 00:08:29,378 --> 00:08:34,122 EMILY, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND. 193 00:08:34,252 --> 00:08:38,474 YOU NEVER WANT TO ACT. YOU WANT TO BE. 194 00:08:38,605 --> 00:08:42,522 RIGHT? THAT'S YOUR METHOD. 195 00:08:42,652 --> 00:08:43,305 WHAT IF I'M NOT ANY GOOD? 196 00:08:43,435 --> 00:08:44,654 UH, WHAT? 197 00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:47,570 YOU ARE A HOBBS. YOU'RE GOING TO BE GREAT. 198 00:08:47,701 --> 00:08:49,441 THANKS. 199 00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,661 EMILY. PROUD OF YOU. 200 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:53,837 - SO PROUD OF YOU. - SUPER PROUD. 201 00:08:53,968 --> 00:08:55,970 GOT IT. 202 00:08:59,974 --> 00:09:01,889 [Southern accent] THE WAR WAS BRUTAL. 203 00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:05,806 EACH SUNRISE WAS LIKE ANOTHER MIRACLE. 204 00:09:05,936 --> 00:09:08,852 IT WAS THE THOUGHT OF HOME THAT KEPT ME ALIVE. 205 00:09:08,983 --> 00:09:11,463 I COULD HAVE NAILED THIS ROLE. 206 00:09:11,594 --> 00:09:14,118 BUT IT'S OKAY. I'VE MOVED ON. 207 00:09:14,249 --> 00:09:17,469 YEAH, I CAN SEE THAT. 208 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,080 I DON'T MEAN TO SOUND NEGATIVE, 209 00:09:19,210 --> 00:09:23,127 BUT THIS PRODUCTION SIMPLY ISN'T HOBBS-WORTHY. 210 00:09:23,258 --> 00:09:24,781 WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? 211 00:09:24,912 --> 00:09:27,436 OUR SET DESIGNER'S LAST CREDIT WAS A HOMECOMING BANNER. 212 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,438 CAN YOU DO BETTER, HON? 213 00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:32,789 DOES THIS ANSWER YOUR QUESTION? 214 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,270 IT RAISES A FEW. 215 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,576 HE'S WITH ME. 216 00:09:36,706 --> 00:09:39,840 YOU, HEADSET. 217 00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:41,493 WHAT'S YOUR NAME? - BRITTANY. 218 00:09:41,624 --> 00:09:43,234 YOU WORK FOR ME NOW, BRITTANY. 219 00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:45,628 ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE. LISTEN UP. 220 00:09:45,759 --> 00:09:47,108 I'M FLYING THIS BIRD NOW. 221 00:09:47,238 --> 00:09:50,024 YOU AND YOU, I NEED A SCRIPT BREAKDOWN AND A PROP LIST. 222 00:09:50,154 --> 00:09:52,287 YOU, I NEED AN INVENTORY OF THE LIGHTING GELS. 223 00:09:52,417 --> 00:09:54,594 BRITTANY. 224 00:09:54,724 --> 00:09:55,943 I NEED YOU TO TAKE ME TO THE NURSE'S OFFICE. 225 00:09:56,073 --> 00:09:57,031 I THINK I MIGHT HAVE PULLED SOMETHING 226 00:09:57,161 --> 00:10:00,904 WHEN I RIPPED OFF MY JUMPSUIT. 227 00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:03,080 - DADDY, HERE COMES EMILY. - OH, OKAY. 228 00:10:03,211 --> 00:10:04,734 [harsh Southern accent] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S YOU, 229 00:10:04,865 --> 00:10:05,953 JIMMY BURNS. 230 00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:09,609 I THOUGHT YOU HAD PERISHED IN THE "WO-AH." 231 00:10:09,739 --> 00:10:12,220 DADDY, WHAT'S WRONG WITH EMILY? 232 00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:14,701 I DON'T KNOW. 233 00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:19,227 AND I WAITED ALL THESE YEARS FOR MY ONE TRUE... 234 00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:21,882 LOVE. 235 00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:24,580 IS SHE SICK? 236 00:10:24,711 --> 00:10:28,410 NO, SHE'S NOT SICK, BABY, BUT SHE IS DYING. 237 00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:34,155 EMILY CAN'T BE THAT BAD. 238 00:10:34,285 --> 00:10:36,679 MAYBE SHE'S NOT COMFORTABLE WITH THE CHARACTER YET. 239 00:10:36,810 --> 00:10:38,463 MAYBE SHE DOESN'T KNOW HER LINES YET. 240 00:10:38,594 --> 00:10:41,162 OUR DAUGHTER HAS THE EMOTIONAL RANGE OF A ROBOT. 241 00:10:41,292 --> 00:10:43,773 A NON-ACTING ROBOT. 242 00:10:43,904 --> 00:10:45,209 THINK ATM, 243 00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:47,951 BUT WITHOUT THE JOY OF GETTING CASH. 244 00:10:48,082 --> 00:10:51,172 THIS IS AWFUL! 245 00:10:51,302 --> 00:10:53,522 OH! 246 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:57,352 JOE, WHY'D YOU LET JANIE GIVE YOU A WEDGIE? 247 00:10:57,482 --> 00:10:59,441 OOF, FROM THE FRONT AND BACK. 248 00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:02,444 IT'S LIKE SHE'S FLOSSING YOU. 249 00:11:02,574 --> 00:11:05,403 I THOUGHT IT'D BE FUNNY. 250 00:11:05,534 --> 00:11:07,797 IT WASN'T. 251 00:11:10,582 --> 00:11:11,714 HEY, ACTRESS GIRL. 252 00:11:11,845 --> 00:11:13,585 HOW WAS REHEARSAL? 253 00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:14,586 WELL, THE PROGRAMS ARE OUT. 254 00:11:14,717 --> 00:11:17,285 OOH, GREAT. EMILY, WE ARE SO-- 255 00:11:17,415 --> 00:11:20,201 PROUD OF ME. HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN. 256 00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:21,681 LOOK, HONEY. 257 00:11:21,811 --> 00:11:23,291 {\an8}BATTLE SCARS: THE JIMMY BURNS STORY. 258 00:11:23,421 --> 00:11:25,249 STARRING EMILY HOBBS, DAUGHTER OF TV'S NUMBER-ONE DAD, 259 00:11:25,380 --> 00:11:27,121 DAVID HOBBS. 260 00:11:27,251 --> 00:11:28,600 THAT'S HORRIBLE. 261 00:11:28,731 --> 00:11:30,298 USING YOUR NAME TO SELL TICKETS? 262 00:11:30,428 --> 00:11:31,560 NO, THE PICTURE THEY USED OF ME. 263 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,737 IT'S THE SAME SIZE AS THE REST OF THE CAST. 264 00:11:34,868 --> 00:11:35,956 WHAT HAVE THEY DONE? 265 00:11:36,086 --> 00:11:38,001 DAVID, FOCUS. 266 00:11:38,132 --> 00:11:39,829 OKAY, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? 267 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,571 I DON'T KNOW, DO YOU THINK I SHOULD ASK THEM TO REPRINT IT? 268 00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,355 MAYBE WHAT SHE NEEDS IS A COACH. 269 00:11:44,486 --> 00:11:47,271 SOMEONE TO JUST TEACH HER THE FINER POINTS OF ACTING. 270 00:11:47,402 --> 00:11:49,534 SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS THE COMPLEXITY 271 00:11:49,665 --> 00:11:51,101 OF A WOMAN LIKE VICTORIA. 272 00:11:51,232 --> 00:11:53,277 UH, OOH. I CAN DO IT. 273 00:11:53,408 --> 00:11:57,325 SURE, YOU GO. 274 00:11:57,455 --> 00:11:59,196 [harsh Southern accent] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT IS YOU, 275 00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,807 JIM-MY BURNS. 276 00:12:00,937 --> 00:12:05,028 I THOUGHT YOU HAD PERISHED IN THE "WO-AH." 277 00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:12,035 WELL, UM... 278 00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:15,299 OKAY, Y--UH... 279 00:12:15,430 --> 00:12:18,999 WHAT DO YOU SAY WE PUT A LITTLE EMOTION INTO THIS? 280 00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:22,480 TRY MOVING YOUR FACE A LITTLE BIT, 281 00:12:22,611 --> 00:12:25,483 MAYBE THROW IN A BLINK. 282 00:12:25,614 --> 00:12:27,311 DAD, I DON'T THINK I'M GETTING IT. 283 00:12:27,442 --> 00:12:28,617 YEAH, UM... 284 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:32,926 WELL, NO. UM... 285 00:12:33,056 --> 00:12:34,884 YOU KNOW, HOW ABOUT-- LET ME DO IT FOR YOU. 286 00:12:35,015 --> 00:12:36,668 THIS WAY YOU CAN GET A FEEL FOR IT, OKAY? 287 00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:38,540 MM-HMM. 288 00:12:38,670 --> 00:12:40,020 [clears throat] 289 00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:41,543 [as Southern belle] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S YOU, 290 00:12:41,673 --> 00:12:43,980 JIMMY BURNS. 291 00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:46,722 I THOUGHT YOU HAD PERISHED IN THE WAR. 292 00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:47,897 RIGHT? 293 00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:52,946 - YEAH. - ALL RIGHT. 294 00:12:53,076 --> 00:12:54,425 [shouting] I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S YOU, 295 00:12:54,556 --> 00:12:56,036 JIMMY BURNS! 296 00:12:56,166 --> 00:12:59,779 I THOUGHT YOU HAD PERISHED IN THE "WO-AH!" 297 00:13:01,650 --> 00:13:05,610 EMILY, YOU KNOW, LOUDER DOESN'T NECESSARILY MEAN BETTER. 298 00:13:05,741 --> 00:13:09,353 IT-IT JUST MEANS LOUDER. 299 00:13:21,409 --> 00:13:23,019 HOW'D IT GO? 300 00:13:23,150 --> 00:13:26,806 [monotone shouting] DOES THIS ANSWER YOUR QUESTION? 301 00:13:29,286 --> 00:13:32,637 HONEY, MAYBE WHAT SHE NEEDS 302 00:13:32,768 --> 00:13:34,161 IS A SOFTER APPROACH. 303 00:13:34,291 --> 00:13:37,381 ONE WITH PATIENCE. A WOMAN'S TOUCH. 304 00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:40,123 ALL RIGHT, I'LL GIVE IT A SHOT. 305 00:13:40,254 --> 00:13:42,125 LOOK, NOT SO FAST, OKAY? 306 00:13:42,256 --> 00:13:45,128 STEP ASIDE. 307 00:13:45,259 --> 00:13:47,478 [painfully slow] I THOUGHT YOU 308 00:13:47,609 --> 00:13:50,786 HAD PE-RISHED IN 309 00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:54,311 THE "WO--AH." 310 00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:02,885 [forced chuckle] 311 00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:07,977 SO? 312 00:14:08,108 --> 00:14:09,370 AHH! 313 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:13,287 I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN THROUGH A "WO-AH"! 314 00:14:13,417 --> 00:14:15,202 RIGHT? 315 00:14:15,332 --> 00:14:17,334 WOW! 316 00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:22,078 DAVID, MAYBE WE'RE MAKING THIS MORE ABOUT US. 317 00:14:22,209 --> 00:14:23,863 MAYBE WE WANT IT MORE THAN SHE DOES. 318 00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:26,953 WE'RE TRYING TO HELP HER, AMY. 319 00:14:27,083 --> 00:14:30,086 WE'RE FAILING, BUT WE'RE TRYING. 320 00:14:30,217 --> 00:14:32,567 THEY'RE TRYING BUT THEY'RE FAILING. 321 00:14:32,697 --> 00:14:34,264 SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST QUIT? 322 00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:35,483 I CAN'T. 323 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:37,180 IT WOULD BREAK MY PARENTS' HEARTS. 324 00:14:37,311 --> 00:14:38,703 I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA-- 325 00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:40,314 WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO. 326 00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,577 MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST TELL HER SHE'S NOT CUT OUT FOR THIS. 327 00:14:42,707 --> 00:14:45,972 WHY CAN'T THEY SEE THAT I'M JUST NOT CUT OUT FOR THIS? 328 00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:48,322 CAN'T DO THAT. THAT WOULD BREAK HER HEART. 329 00:14:48,452 --> 00:14:50,193 YOU SHOULD SEE HER ON STAGE WITH THIS BOY, MATTHEW. 330 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:51,978 SHE LOOKS SO HAPPY. 331 00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:54,894 I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN I WAS JUST SCREAMING AND FAINTING. 332 00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:56,591 WELL, IF YOU HAVE A BETTER IDEA, 333 00:14:56,721 --> 00:14:58,071 I WOULD LOVE TO-- 334 00:14:58,201 --> 00:15:01,248 - HEAR SOME GOOD NEWS? - YES, PLEASE. 335 00:15:01,378 --> 00:15:03,467 NOBODY EVER COMES TO OUR HIGH SCHOOL PLAYS. 336 00:15:03,598 --> 00:15:05,992 I BET IF WE CHECK OUT THE TICKET SALES, THEY'D BE-- 337 00:15:06,122 --> 00:15:09,256 all: [incredulous] SOLD OUT? 338 00:15:09,386 --> 00:15:11,562 EVEN AN UNDERSIZED PICTURE OF ME WORKS MAGIC. 339 00:15:11,693 --> 00:15:13,390 [groans] 340 00:15:16,567 --> 00:15:19,222 JUST PULL IT. 341 00:15:19,353 --> 00:15:22,225 YOU PULL IT. 342 00:15:22,356 --> 00:15:23,792 I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU'D DO ANYTHING FOR YOUR DAUGHTER. 343 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:27,796 ALL RIGHT, FINE. COVER ME. 344 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:30,886 SIR DAVID! [gasps] 345 00:15:32,496 --> 00:15:34,237 WE MAY HAVE A PROBLEM WITH LADY EMILY. 346 00:15:34,368 --> 00:15:39,068 YOU'RE JUST FIGURING THAT OUT NOW? 347 00:15:39,199 --> 00:15:40,504 SHE WON'T COME OUT OF HER DRESSING ROOM. 348 00:15:40,635 --> 00:15:42,637 [orchestra begins] 349 00:15:42,767 --> 00:15:45,335 [playing {\an8}When Johnny Comes Marching Home] 350 00:15:45,466 --> 00:15:49,209 ♪ 351 00:15:50,993 --> 00:15:52,429 HONEY, YOU OKAY? 352 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:53,953 - OKAY? - YEAH? 353 00:15:54,083 --> 00:15:56,346 I AM AWESOME {\an8}AND OKAY. 354 00:15:56,477 --> 00:15:58,827 CAN'T YOU TELL? 355 00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:02,265 HOW ARE YOU GUYS? 356 00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:04,920 HONEY, IT'S TOTALLY NATURAL. ALL ACTORS GET STAGE FRIGHT. 357 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:08,706 WELL, NOT ALL. 358 00:16:08,837 --> 00:16:11,231 I DON'T HAVE STAGE FRIGHT. 359 00:16:11,361 --> 00:16:12,754 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU GUYS THAT 360 00:16:12,884 --> 00:16:17,063 I DON'T WANT TO BE AN ACTRESS! 361 00:16:17,193 --> 00:16:19,282 I ONLY AUDITIONED TO BE AN EXTRA TO SPEND TIME WITH MATTHEW, 362 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:20,936 AND THEN, SOMEHOW, I END UP IN THE LEAD. 363 00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:22,982 HOW COULD THAT POSSIBLY HAVE EVEN HAPPENED? 364 00:16:23,112 --> 00:16:26,420 - DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT. - WHO KNOWS? 365 00:16:26,550 --> 00:16:28,509 HONEY, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TELL US? 366 00:16:28,639 --> 00:16:29,858 ARE YOU KIDDING? 367 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:31,425 YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN SO EXCITED ABOUT ME FOLLOWING 368 00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:34,602 IN YOUR ACTING FOOTSTEPS. 369 00:16:34,732 --> 00:16:36,169 I WAS AFRAID I'D DISAPPOINT YOU. 370 00:16:36,299 --> 00:16:39,346 WE THOUGHT YOU WANTED THIS. 371 00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:41,435 WHATEVER YOU DECIDE TO DO, WE COULD NEVER EVER 372 00:16:41,565 --> 00:16:43,263 BE DISAPPOINTED IN YOU. 373 00:16:43,393 --> 00:16:44,829 WE LOVE YOU. 374 00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:47,006 THANKS, MOM. LOVE YOU, TOO. 375 00:16:47,136 --> 00:16:48,181 [knock at door] 376 00:16:48,311 --> 00:16:49,704 [breathless] FIVE MINUTES TILL CURTAIN. 377 00:16:49,834 --> 00:16:54,013 AND FYI, YOUR OTHER KIDS ARE ORGANIZING A FLASH MOB. 378 00:16:54,143 --> 00:16:57,712 SO THERE'S THAT. 379 00:16:57,842 --> 00:16:59,322 I GOT THAT. OKAY. 380 00:16:59,453 --> 00:17:01,933 THANK YOU. 381 00:17:02,064 --> 00:17:04,110 [sighs] 382 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:05,502 EMILY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS. 383 00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:06,982 DAD, I'M A HOBBS. 384 00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:08,592 I'M GONNA FINISH WHAT I START. 385 00:17:08,723 --> 00:17:10,768 THAT'S MY GIRL. 386 00:17:10,899 --> 00:17:13,641 MM! 387 00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:15,556 ALL RIGHT, LISTEN, 388 00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:18,646 AT THE END OF THE DAY, ALL ACTING REALLY IS 389 00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:21,997 IS JUST TWO PEOPLE TALKING TO EACH OTHER, RIGHT? 390 00:17:22,128 --> 00:17:24,347 SO WHEN YOU GET ON THAT STAGE, 391 00:17:24,478 --> 00:17:28,438 ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS LOOK INTO MATTHEW PEARSON'S EYES 392 00:17:28,569 --> 00:17:31,006 AND JUST PRETEND YOU'RE THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. 393 00:17:31,137 --> 00:17:33,704 THAT I CAN DO. 394 00:17:33,835 --> 00:17:35,445 THANKS, DADDY. 395 00:17:35,576 --> 00:17:37,708 OKAY, BABY. 396 00:17:37,839 --> 00:17:40,494 GIVE ME A HUG. MM! 397 00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,757 ALL RIGHT. 398 00:17:42,887 --> 00:17:44,106 [fire alarm rattles] 399 00:17:44,237 --> 00:17:45,803 MR. HOBBS! 400 00:17:45,934 --> 00:17:48,458 MATTHEW? YOU--YOU OKAY? 401 00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:50,678 UH, YEAH, YEAH. I'M JUST A LITTLE NERVOUS. 402 00:17:50,808 --> 00:17:51,679 OH. 403 00:17:51,809 --> 00:17:54,203 IT DOESN'T SHOW. 404 00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:57,728 I CAN'T DO THIS. I CAN'T GO OUT THERE. 405 00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:59,513 I'D RATHER GO TO AN ACTUAL WAR 406 00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,341 THAN STEP OUT THERE IN FRONT OF ALL THOSE PEOPLE. 407 00:18:01,471 --> 00:18:04,431 I-I DON'T WANT TO MAKE EMILY LOOK BAD. 408 00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:07,260 EMILY HOBBS? 409 00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:09,523 TELL HER I'M SORRY. 410 00:18:09,653 --> 00:18:10,785 NO, NO. WAIT, MATTHEW. 411 00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:12,395 WAIT A MINUTE! 412 00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:16,095 - CUE THE STORM CLOUDS. - STORM CLOUDS. 413 00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:19,924 [thunder rumbling] 414 00:18:20,055 --> 00:18:22,405 - AND CUE THE SUN. - SUN. 415 00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,408 [playing {\an8}When Johnny Comes Marching Home] 416 00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:28,455 ♪ 417 00:18:28,585 --> 00:18:30,413 IT'S A NEW DAY DAWNING, JIMMY. 418 00:18:30,544 --> 00:18:33,590 I'M SO GLAD YOU ARE FINALLY HOME FROM THE-- 419 00:18:33,721 --> 00:18:35,940 WOAH. 420 00:18:36,071 --> 00:18:39,030 I'M SURE YOU'RE SURPRISED, VICTORIA. 421 00:18:39,161 --> 00:18:42,033 WAR DOES STRANGE THINGS TO A MAN, 422 00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:46,560 CHANGES HIM-- LITERALLY. 423 00:18:46,690 --> 00:18:50,085 I KNOW YOU DIDN'T EXPECT TO SEE ME LIKE THIS. 424 00:18:50,216 --> 00:18:53,436 UH, YEAH. 425 00:18:53,567 --> 00:18:55,656 TURNS OUT PRIVATE PEARSON WAS A YELLOW BELLY, 426 00:18:55,786 --> 00:18:58,920 WENT AWOL. 427 00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:02,315 THE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU HAD THE COURAGE 428 00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:05,274 TO GO ON WITHOUT HIM. 429 00:19:05,405 --> 00:19:07,363 SO WHATEVER YOU WERE GOING TO SAY TO HIM, 430 00:19:07,494 --> 00:19:09,757 YOU CAN SAY TO ME. 431 00:19:09,887 --> 00:19:13,064 JUST LOOK IN MY EYES. 432 00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:16,677 [deep breath] 433 00:19:16,807 --> 00:19:19,854 I HAVE RECEIVED YOUR NUMEROUS LETTERS, JIMMY BURNS, 434 00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:22,596 AND I WAS SHOCKED TO LEARN OF YOUR INJURIES. 435 00:19:22,726 --> 00:19:26,252 BUT I KNEW, ONE DAY, YOU WOULD RETURN TO ME. 436 00:19:26,382 --> 00:19:28,558 NO MATTER HOW PAINFUL YOUR WOUNDS, 437 00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:31,779 OR HOW HORRIBLE YOUR SCARS, 438 00:19:31,909 --> 00:19:34,695 IT WAS THE DEPTH OF YOUR SOUL THAT I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON. 439 00:19:36,436 --> 00:19:39,569 NOW THAT WAS WORTH COMING HOME FROM THE WAR. 440 00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:44,922 WELL, YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN MY INSPIRATION, JIMMY BURNS. 441 00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:50,754 [cheers and applause] 442 00:19:54,889 --> 00:19:56,456 EMILY, YOU WERE FANTASTIC. 443 00:19:56,586 --> 00:19:58,327 I KNOW! WEIRD. 444 00:19:58,458 --> 00:20:00,199 I HAD NO IDEA I HAD IT IN ME. 445 00:20:00,329 --> 00:20:02,201 I DID. I'M SO-- 446 00:20:02,331 --> 00:20:03,376 - PROUD. - [laughs] 447 00:20:03,506 --> 00:20:04,899 I KNOW, DAD. 448 00:20:05,029 --> 00:20:06,857 [cheers and applause] 449 00:20:06,988 --> 00:20:09,469 YES! THAT'S MY BABY! 450 00:20:09,599 --> 00:20:12,472 FOLLOWING IN MY FOOTSTEPS! 451 00:20:12,602 --> 00:20:15,649 I GREW THAT! 452 00:20:15,779 --> 00:20:18,217 - DADDY. - YEAH, I'LL TALK TO MOM. 453 00:20:18,347 --> 00:20:20,349 THANK YOU. 454 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,091 [remixed on video] THE IMPORTANT THING 455 00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:24,223 IS COUR--COURAGE. COURAGE. 456 00:20:24,353 --> 00:20:25,876 COUR--COUR--COUR-- COURAGE. COURAGE. 457 00:20:26,007 --> 00:20:28,401 COURAGE. 458 00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:31,795 THIS IS A MOCKERY OF THE PERFORMING ARTS. 459 00:20:31,926 --> 00:20:35,321 BUT WE HAVE 250,000 HITS ALREADY! 460 00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:36,583 [remixed] YELLO--YELLO-- YELLO--YELLOW BELLY. 461 00:20:36,713 --> 00:20:38,280 REALLY? 462 00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:39,499 [on video] COURAGE. YELLOW BELLY. 463 00:20:39,629 --> 00:20:42,284 WO-AH.