>> ON THIS EPISODE OF BIG ANG...
>> THAT'S HOW YOU KEEP A GUCCI?
>> THE CLOSET'S A DISASTER, AND
IT'S MORE PACKED THAN EVER.
>> ANGELA IS HERE TO LEAVE
STUFF.
>> THIS IS GIVING ME VERY BAD
ANXIETY.
NOW THAT I HAVE THE SPRAY
TANNING SALON, I HAVE TO LEARN
HOW TO DO IT.
YOU LOOK FREAKIN' GOOD.
>> WE HAVE A NEW NIGHT HERE AT
THE DRUNKEN MONKEY--TUESGAY.
MAKE SOME NOISE FOR NEW YORK
CITY'S NEWEST DRAG QUEEN,
BIG ANG.
>> DRUNKEN MONKEY!
>> * I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* TH--TH--THE WISE GUYS
* I WANT THAT
* I WANNA HAVE FUN
* AND GET WHACKED
* OH, MY GOD
* I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* TH--TH--THE WISE GUYS
* I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* I-I-I LOVE--LOVE DIAMONDS
* I WANT THAT
* A MASSAGE, FACIAL
* AND SPRAY TAN
* A MASSAGE, FACIAL
* E-E-EVERYBODY LOVES ME
>> ON THIS EPISODE OF BIG ANG...
>> THAT'S HOW YOU KEEP A GUCCI?
>> THE CLOSET'S A DISASTER, AND
IT'S MORE PACKED THAN EVER.
>> ANGELA IS HERE TO LEAVE
STUFF.
>> THIS IS GIVING ME VERY BAD
ANXIETY.
NOW THAT I HAVE THE SPRAY
TANNING SALON, I HAVE TO LEARN
HOW TO DO IT.
YOU LOOK FREAKIN' GOOD.
>> WE HAVE A NEW NIGHT HERE AT
THE DRUNKEN MONKEY--TUESGAY.
MAKE SOME NOISE FOR NEW YORK
CITY'S NEWEST DRAG QUEEN,
BIG ANG.
>> DRUNKEN MONKEY!
>> * I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* TH--TH--THE WISE GUYS
* I WANT THAT
* I WANNA HAVE FUN
* AND GET WHACKED
* OH, MY GOD
* I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* TH--TH--THE WISE GUYS
* I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS
* I-I-I LOVE--LOVE DIAMONDS
* I WANT THAT
* A MASSAGE, FACIAL
* AND SPRAY TAN
* A MASSAGE, FACIAL
* E-E-EVERYBODY LOVES ME
>> ALL RIGHT, JOHN, WAIT.
I'M GONNA TELL HER WE'RE HERE.
HEY, ANG?
>> OH, HI, DOM.
>> WE HAVE YOUR EX-ZEBRA, NOW
HORSE.
>> OOH, I'M DYING TO SEE IT.
I USED TO HAVE A LIFE-SIZED
ZEBRA STATUE, BUT I TOOK IT TO
THE BODY SHOP TO GET IT SPRAYED
LIKE A BLACK STALLION.
OH, HE IS SO GODDAMN COOL.
I REALLY, REALLY LOVE HIM.
HE IS THE BOMB.
THIS ZEBRA HAS BEEN AROUND.
HE CAME FROM A STRIP CLUB.
HE WAS GIVEN TO ME BY A VERY
DEAR FRIEND OF MINE.
AND I'VE JUST BEEN MOVING WITH
THE ZEBRA FROM HOUSE TO HOUSE.
>> HE WENT FROM MISTER ZEBRA TO
MISTER ED.
>> I THINK HE MAKES A BETTER
HORSE THAN HE DID A ZEBRA.
>> WHAT DO YOU THINK?
>> I LOVE THE WAY HIS HEAD IS
TURNED.
>> HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S LOOKING IN
THE MIRROR.
[laughs]
>> EXACTLY.
>> MAYBE HE'S LOOKING AT HIS
BUTT.
[chuckles]
>> I THINK HE'S BEEN THROUGH
A LOT.
THE POOR THING NEEDS TO BE HOME.
>> NO, HE LOOKS GOOD.
WELL, THEY FIXED ALL THE DENTS
IN HIM.
>> HE HAD PLASTIC SURGERY.
>> HE GOT PLASTIC SURGERY.
IT RUNS IN THE FAMILY.
>> MY KINDA HORSE.
>> IT CAME REALLY NICE, RIGHT?
>> I LOVE HIM.
>> ANG!
>> NOW WE'RE TALKING.
NOW IT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING.
YOU'RE DOING GOOD.
>> I'M STARTING A SPRAY TANNING
BUSINESS.
I WANT THE SALON TO LOOK JUST
LIKE MY HOUSE.
I WANT IT TO BE GLAMOROUS AND
VERY COLORFUL AND BRIGHT.
I NEED TWO BLACK PATENT LEATHER
CHAIRS.
>> OKAY.
>> I ORDERED TWO HIGH-HEELED
CHAIRS.
>> OKAY.
>> HOT PINK LEATHER WITH
BLACK AND WHITE ZEBRA.
>> NICE.
>> I DECIDED TO NAME THE SALON
"BIG ANG'S SECRET" BECAUSE IT'S
GONNA BE OFFERING A LOT MORE
THAN SPRAY TAN--HAIR EXTENSIONS,
EYELASH EXTENSIONS, MAKEUP.
EVERYTHING THAT I LOVE.
WE SERVE A LITTLE WINE, PIECE OF
CHEESE, A [bleep] GLASS OF
SANGRIA.
I LIKE THAT.
>> YEAH, THEY'LL NEVER LEAVE.
>> GOOD, WE DON'T WANT THEM--
THE LONGER THEY STAY, THE MORE
THEY BUY.
>> YES, IT'S TRUE.
>> THERE'S TWO THINGS I'M REALLY
GOOD AT: SERVING DRINKS AND
LOOKING GOOD TAN.
WE'LL GET OLD PORNO MAGAZINES
FOR THE ANIMALS.
>> THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
>> WE'LL GET, LIKE, A BIG TIT
MAGAZINE.
THAT'S GOOD.
>> THERE YOU GO.
>> NOW THAT I HAVE THIS SPRAY
TANNING SALON, I HAVE TO LEARN
HOW TO DO IT.
BRING ON THE SPRAY TAN.
BIGGER IS BETTER!
>> KILO, WHAT'S UP, BROTHER?
NOW GET--
NO.
>> I WENT TO A GAY PRIDE PARTY.
>> OKAY.
>> NOBODY HAS BETTER PARTIES
THAN THEM.
>> THE BEST.
>> I MET THE BEST DRAG QUEENS
AND GO-GO BOYS, AND I WANNA DO
THAT EXACT THEME IN MY BAR ON
TUESDAYS.
>> THAT'S NOT A BAD IDEA.
>> EVERYTHING GAY.
EVERYBODY GAY.
>> YOU DOLL THE WHOLE BAR UP.
YOU MAKE IT ALL FESTIVE.
YOU MAKE IT DIFFERENT.
I THINK IT WOULD BE GREAT.
AND THERE'S NOWHERE ON
STATEN ISLAND FOR THE GAY
COMMUNITY.
I THINK IT'S A GREAT IDEA.
>> SO THAT'S IT.
WE'RE GONNA DO IT.
WE'RE GONNA TUESGAYS, EVERY
TUESDAY.
>> I LOVE IT.
>> FRANKY IS VERY SUPPORTIVE.
HE'S ALWAYS THERE TO HELP ME,
NO MATTER WHAT.
[ding]
I'M OPENING THE SPRAY TANNING
PLACE, REMEMBER?
I TOLD YOU ABOUT IT.
>> I KNOW, I HEARD.
>> AND I GOT MY OWN SPECIAL
FORMULA, MY OWN COLOR, AND I'M
GONNA SPRAY YOU WITH IT.
>> I'M ALWAYS THE GUINEA PIG
WITH EVERYTHING.
>> LET'S GO.
>> PLEASE.
>> GET THE [bleep] CLOTHES OFF.
>> PLEASE.
>> MOVE IT.
>> [groans]
>> LISTEN, I DON'T REALLY KNOW
MUCH ABOUT SPRAY TANNING.
FRANKY SHOULD BE VERY
CONCERNED.
>> EVERY TIME I'M HERE, YOU
[bleep] WITH MY UNDERWEAR.
>> OH, MY GOD.
LOOK AT THOSE LEGS.
>> LOOK GOOD, RIGHT?
>> OH, MY GOD.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I CAN DO
THIS.
>> WATCH MY PEESH.
>> SHUSH.
YOU MAKE ME NERVOUS.
[spraying]
>> I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.
>> I FORGOT I HAD TO TURN THE
GUN ON.
>> YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE
[bleep] YOU'RE DOING.
>> I DO.
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
DO LIKE THAT.
>> [exhales]
>> YOU LOOK FREAKIN' GOOD.
>> ARE YOU SURE?
>> LET ME SEE THE UNDERWEAR
MARK.
AHH! AHH!
I DID IT!
>> HOW'S THE ASS? GOOD?
>> OH!
LET ME SEE THIS PART.
OOH.
>> YOU DID A GREAT JOB.
>> LOOK AT THAT.
>> OH, MAN.
>> I'M VERY EXCITED.
>> ALL RIGHT, YOU BUMP UP MY
SHIFT PAY TO $100 MORE, I'LL
WALK AROUND LIKE THIS ON GAY
NIGHT.
>> [laughs]
>> [chuckles]
>> TO GLAMOUR AND BEAUTY.
>> EVERY DAY, ALL YOU'RE GONNA
BE WEARING IS GLITTER.
I GUARANTEE IT.
>> YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS.
>> THE MOMENT OF TRUTH.
>> THEY'RE GONNA THINK I'M A
[bleep] NUT WHEN THEY SEE THIS.
>> HELLO.
>> JEN'S MAKING ME GO TO THE
CONSIGNMENT SHOP TO GET RID OF
SOME OF MY CLOTHES.
SHE'S SAYING, "GET RID OF IT.
GET RID OF IT."
I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN DO THIS.
[grunts]
>> THANK YOU.
>> SO HEAVY.
>> LET'S KEEP ONE THING IN MIND.
ANGELA IS HERE TO LEAVE STUFF
HERE...
>> IN THE STORE.
>> NOT TO LEAVE STUFF WITH US.
>> GOTCHA.
SO LET'S CHECK OUT WHAT YOU
HAVE.
>> THIS IS ST. JOHN'S.
>> YES.
>> I PAID $4,000 FOR IT.
THIS IS BRAND-NEW.
THIS IS A NICE DRESS.
SO IT WAS, LIKE, A $600 DRESS.
THIS IS GUCCI.
THIS IS BCBG.
THIS IS MISS SIXTY.
>> MISS SIXTY.
>> THESE ARE LEATHER PANTS.
>> WHOA.
I BET YOU THIS HAS SOME HISTORY.
>> ALL HER CLOTHES HAVE HISTORY.
>> I KEEP THEM.
I KEEP THEM.
I DON'T GIVE THIS.
>> SO RIGHT NOW, WE ARE AT 760.
>> SO I GET 760?
>> NO, YOU GET A CUT OF 760.
>> [exhales]
YOU ONLY GET 350.
I DON'T KNOW.
THIS IS GIVING ME VERY BAD
ANXIETY.
>> IT'S JUST CLOTHES.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M GONNA SELL IT, AND THAT'S
IT.
>> THIS WAS A SUCCESSFUL DAY.
GET US OUT OF HERE, DOLL.
>> I WANNA JUST LOOK A LITTLE
BIT.
>> YOU ARE A SNEAKY BASTARD.
>> OH, SHUT UP.
LET ME JUST LOOK.
JEN KNOWS EXACTLY HOW I AM.
OOH.
>> YOU LOOK STUNNING.
THAT'S A TOP FOR YOU.
>> OOH, LOOK.
OOH, I LOVE THOSE.
I WANT THEM.
I DON'T CARE.
>> ANGELA.
>> I HAVE A PROBLEM.
I'M SORRY.
OOH, MAYBE I'LL BUY HOT PANTS.
>> YOU DON'T NEED [bleep] GOLD
HOT PANTS.
>> OKAY.
>> [laughs]
>> TONIGHT IS TUESGAYS AT THE
DRUNKEN MONKEY.
MY DRAG QUEEN FRIEND, PORCELAIN,
AND ME, WE ARE DOING THE DRAG
SHOW.
[doorbell rings]
AND THEY'RE GOING TO GIVE ME A
DRAG MAKEOVER.
AAH!
>> THE DRAG QUEENS HAVE LANDED.
>> LOOK HOW GORGEOUS YOUS LOOK.
>> OH.
>> COME IN, COME IN, COME IN.
>> I [bleep] LOVE YOUR HOUSE.
DID YOU DECORATE THIS YOURSELF?
>> YEAH.
>> OOH, GIRL.
>> I HAVE A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE.
>> CHAMPAGNE WORKS.
>> OOH, CHAMPAGNE SOUNDS
DELICIOUS.
>> THAT'S ALWAYS FANCY.
PINKIES UP.
[cork pops]
OH!
>> HERE WE GO.
TO GLAMOUR AND BEAUTY.
>> THEY'RE GONNA THINK I'M A
[bleep] NUT WHEN THEY SEE THIS.
>> HOW DRAMATIC DO YOU WANNA GO?
>> DRAMATIC.
>> LET'S DO IT.
THOSE CHEEKS ARE AMAZING.
YOU ARE A NATURAL DRAG QUEEN.
>> THANK YOU, DR. LEDERMAN.
>> [laughs]
>> MY WHOLE LIFE, PEOPLE HAVE
BEEN ASKING IF I WAS A DRAG
QUEEN.
NO, I'M NOT.
I'M A WOMAN.
STOP BREAKING MY [bleep] BALLS.
HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR YOUS
TO GET READY?
>> [scoffs]
>> WHAT, DO YOU [bleep] SLEEP
STANDING UP?
[Gothic music]
**
>> WAKE UP, READY TO GO.
>> LADIES, LET'S COVER ME IN
GLITTER, 'CAUSE I'M READY TO
SPARKLE.
>> EVERY DAY, ALL YOU'RE GONNA
BE WEARING IS GLITTER.
I GUARANTEE IT.
>> THEY ARE GOING TO DIE TONIGHT
WHEN THEY SEE YOU.
WHERE'S YOUR SHOT GLASSES?
I LOVE THAT YOU KEEP YOUR LIQUOR
NEXT TO YOUR WIENERS.
>> THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I LIKE
THE WIENERS, WHEN I DRINK THE
LIQUOR.
>> CHEERS, MAMA.
>> YOU'RE MAKIN' ME NERVOUS.
>> THE MOMENT OF TRUTH.
>> OH, MY GOD.
>> [gasps]
YOU LOOK AMAZING.
>> GORGEOUS.
>> GAY-MAZING.
>> I WENT ALL OUT FOR THIS.
THIS TUESGAYS BETTER BE A
SUCCESS.
>> STATEN ISLAND BETTER WATCH
OUT, HONEY.
>> LET'S OPEN THE FREAKIN' BAR!
>> THIS PARTY'S GONNA BE
ROCKIN'.
>> MAKE SOME NOISE FOR NEW YORK
CITY'S FIERCEST, NEWEST DRAG
QUEEN, BIG ANG!
>> YES!
>> HAVEN'T HAD YOUR FILL OF
>> LET'S OPEN THE FREAKIN' BAR!
[cheering]
>> I'M NOT EVEN IN THE BAR YET,
BUT FROM THE NOISE ON THE
STREET, I COULD TELL THIS
PARTY'S GONNA BE ROCKIN'.
[dance music]
*
>> MAKE SOME NOISE FOR NEW YORK
CITY'S FIERCEST, NEWEST DRAG
QUEEN, BIG ANG.
[cheers and applause]
>> BIG THUMBS-UP!
>> I AM SO IMPRESSED.
I WALK IN AND THE PLACE IS
PACKED.
>> CHEERS, EVERYBODY.
>> WHOO!
>> MWAH.
>> I LOVE YOUR OUTFIT.
>> YOU LOOK FABULOUS.
[laughs]
SNAP THAT [bleep].
[fan snapping]
>> OW!
>> WHAT, BITCH?
>> I'M VERY EXCITED, BECAUSE WE
HAVE A NEW NIGHT HERE AT THE
DRUNKEN MONKEY CALLED TUESGAYS,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
AND FOR THE GRAND OPENING, THE
LOVELY ANG AND HER SISTER
DECIDED TO DRESS UP AS LIL' KIM
AND SNOOKI.
SO IT'S ALL GOOD.
MAKE SOME NOISE FOR BIG ANG,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
[cheers and applause]
[dance music]
**
[cheering]
**
>> THIS DRAG SHOW WAS ON AND
POPPIN'.
I'M LOVING EVERY MINUTE OF IT.
THESE DRAG QUEENS COULD DANCE.
>> NO?
IT'S LIKE A BIG CLUSTER[bleep]
OF NONSENSE.
NOTHING I HAVE EVER SEEN BEFORE.
BUT ANGELA DEFINITELY DID IT
RIGHT WITH THIS NIGHT.
[cheers and applause]
>> I LOVE THE GAY COMMUNITY
BECAUSE THEY LOVE TO SPEND THEIR
MONEY, THEY LOVE TO HAVE FUN,
AND THEY COULD PARTY ANY DAY OF
THE WEEK.
>> ANGIE, WHICH ONE HAS A BIGGER
[bleep]?
>> all: [chanting] LINDA! LINDA!
LINDA! LINDA! LINDA! LINDA!
>> EVERYBODY'S HAVING SUCH AN
AMAZING TIME.
AND SURE ENOUGH, THERE'S LINDA
ON THE BAR DOING BODY SHOTS.
>> YEAH!
[cheers and applause]
>> WHO'S YOUR MAMA?
[techno music]
*
>> TUESGAYS IS BETTER THAN I
COULD EVER EXPECT.
IF I HAVE TO BE DRESSED IN DRAG
EVERY TUESDAY FOR A PARTY LIKE
THIS, I WILL.
>> GIVE IT UP FOR ANGELA.
[cheers and applause]
DRUNKEN MONKEY!
>> NEXT TIME ON BIG ANG...
NEIL AND I GOT MARRIED SO FAST I
NEVER GOT AN ENGAGEMENT RING,
BUT NOW I WANT TO GET ENGAGED.
NEIL, WAKE UP AND SMELL THE
COFFEE.
IF YOU DON'T GET THE RING, IT'S
OVER.
I JUST SPOKE TO A.J.
HE'S GONNA COME HOME.
SO I WAS THINKING OF THROWING A
BIG POOL PARTY.
>> WHERE'S THE PARTY AT?
>> LOOK WHO'S HERE!
>> AAH!
HI, DRITA.
>> I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING
I GOT FOR YOUR SISTER.
>> OH, MY GOD.
YOU'RE GONNA GIVE HER A REAL
HEART ATTACK.